The Misadventures of Rapidsnap: Fighting with Myself

For two bucking weeks. Two bucking weeks I tell you. I was plagued by that crazy pink party mare. If she wasn't appearing out of nowhere at random times, it was to leave notes or random gifts reminding me of the party I'm supposed to attend was drawing closer and that I'm not to miss it. To be honest, I didn't mind the gifts too much, as the cupcakes she left a few times were rather nice.

The random appearances on the otherhoof, well I lost track of the amount of times to pop out of nowhere, usually at the worst possible moment. Honestly, that mare had no sense of privacy much to my shock and annoyance when she popped up out of my toilet when I was about to take a leak, it was embarrassing enough that she saw me well, I leave it there for you to think about it.

It got worse however, she randomly popped up when I went to visit my parents. Much explaining was to be done to my folks after they asked me twenty questions about this apparent mystery pink marefriend I kept from them. It took me three days to explain that I was not in any sort of relationship with her, though that wasn't helped when she brought up about seeing my thing when she appeared in my toilet.

Fortunately, I think, there was times when she appeared when there was no audience, like actually appearing alongside me in my bed when I woke up. Sitting up in my own bed screaming is not a way I want to wake up again. I admit she is a pretty looking mare, but she isn't the type for me and too crazy for me to deal with too. To be honest I'm amazed I didn't end up going crazy from her appearances, fortunately despite her habit of popping out of things, she didn't cause any damage, which is fortunate considering I just got myself a camera worth 550 bits to replace the ones destroyed by them idiotic guards.

I have to admit, in hindsight I'm glad it happened as this camera has gotten me a few good shots for work in the past week and a bit. Mind it had been a busy week, and I really needed a break, and I reluctantly decided to go to this party just so I could get this damn mare off my back.

“You know Pinkie, you don't have to actually be on my back. I am heading to your party as of this moment.” I complained.

“Oh I know silly,” she beamed. “But your back is so comfy and you're so lovely, warm and cuddly.”

I groan and roll my eyes, not helping I thought. “Anyway,” I interjected. “Aren't you meant to be preparing for the party.” And possibly give me some peace and quiet for the rest of my journey I mused.

The Pink pony brought a hoof up to her muzzle and pondered. “I suppose you're right. But I had to make sure you were coming as I really wanted you to be there.”

“And what is so special about me attending?” I asked her.

“Well you aren't go to know as it's a surprise,” she grinned as she started bouncing. “Though I suppose since I know you are on your way, then I will leave you be and see you really really soon and we can have lots of fun and have a really great time.”

“Yeah, whatever Pinkie,” I replied unenthusiastically, though I sudden realise I was all by myself again, that damn mare done her disappearing trick again. Never mind, at least I can enjoy this rare train journey now, not often I get the train, only because I tried to escape to Canterlot to hide from her, and that didn't work. I just wanted to rest as I darted around the city to hide from that pink menace, but I learned there's no escape from her. Sighing, I settled down in my seat and drifted off to sleep.

I woke up when I felt the train brakes applying, blinking I look out the window and saw Ponyville appear on the horizon. Hmm seems like a nice place. I was disrupted from my thoughts when the train tannoy crackled into life. “Next stop Ponyville where this train terminates. All change please.”

I stretch out my legs and wings with the bones in them giving a satisfying crack. As soon as I was done, I headed for the exit to the carriage. As the train drew into the station, I noticed it wasn't a fancy affair, just more functional, there was a few ponies on the platform, no doubt heading to Canterlot or waiting for friends arriving. The train halted and the doors opened, well I'm here I thought to myself as I stepped onto the platform. Suddenly I realised something, I had no idea where I was supposed to be heading, I knew the party was taking place in Ponyville, but I didn't know exactly where. My mind when into a slight panic. Oh crap oh crap oh crap, I'm in a town I don't know and I'm going to get lost. I wandered out to the front of the station to see if anyone could help me, or even see if the pink pest was outside waiting for me. Looking around, I couldn't see her, typical just when I want to see her, she isn't here.

I scan the crowd of ponies outside the station, most people seem occupied with their own friends and relatives, it would be rude of me to interrupt them so I decided against asking them. I keep scanning the ponies around me to see if someone, oh my what a specimen, those muscles and that plot and he's all alone. Smiling, I beat my wings and fluttered over to him. “Excuse me?” I enquired. “I wonder if you be able to assist me.”

The red stallion looked at me with a neutral look on his face. “Eeyup,” he replied.

His one worded emotionless reply surprised me for a moment, before I remembered what I was going to ask him. “Eh yeah good, erm could you tell me where I, well I've told that I come to here to go to a party,” I awaited his answer, but I'm sure I could sense he was trying to work out my question, I looked at his ears expecting some smoke to come out to suggest that his brain overloaded, but what I got was a new voice interrupting the silence.

“Big Mac?” The voice whined. “How long are we going to be waiting for. Ah got to get back to the clubhouse to arrange with Scootaloo and Sweetie Belle for what we are doing at tonight's party.”

I blink at the mention of party and quickly question the filly. “Say young one, this party. It isn't being hosted by Pinkie Pie by chance.

The yellow filly eyed me curiously. “Why wouldn't it be held by Pinkie Pie?” She spoke. “Pinkie Pie's responsible for all of the parties around here, why are ya asking?”

“Well to be honest,” I said sheepishly. “I kind of been told to come to come to a party here in Ponyville by Pinkie Pie, except she... well she hasn't told me when and where it was.”

Excitement spread across the face of the filly as she proceeded to repeatedly jump on the red stallions back, he on the otherhoof looked rather unmoved, I was beginning to wonder if he was some sort of robopony or part of the Royal Guard, taking into consideration on how silent and unflinching he was to this filly's hyperactivity.

“Me and ma friends are also going to the party too,” the bouncing filly beamed.

“Great.” I replied whilst putting on a fake smile. Yeah great I thought, I've got an invite to a party for foals. I looked at her sadly, “well, I'm not sure if I'm still going or not...” I tried to think of a plausible excuse, but at this moment my brain wasn't providing me with any. “I'm only really came he because I made a Pinkie Promise that I would turn up.”

The filly's eyes widened as she gasped. “Yah know you shouldn't break one of Pinkies Promises, ain't that so Big Mac.”

“Eeyup,” came the stoic reply.

I stared at him and muttered under my breath. “You know it's possible to say more than one word.” I hear a rather low growl and looked up to find him glaring at me causing me to gulp a little.

The filly continued unaware of the change in the stallions mood. “Mah big sis Applejack once broke a Pinkie Promise, and she ended up fearing for her life. She thought Pinkie was going to murder her or something.”

I gulped even more loudly than previously. “So how, how did she get out of it?” I asked shakeably.

“Ah think it was something to do with breakfast. Ah think ya probably better off asking her about it all at the party tonight,” she answered.

“Oh I see,” I replied feeling a bit downcast that there was no escape, well providing that this Big Mac doesn't throttle me first. “Oh,” I cried remembering what I needed to know. “Where and when is the party taking place?”

“Oh yeah, it's at Sugarcube Corner over in the market place.” she replied happily.

“Oh right, I have a few hours to kill beforehoof,” I pondered. “Guess I have a look around the place. Thank you for your help erm...”

“Oh mah names Apple Bloom, and this is mah big brother Big Mac,” she relied eagerly. “Say if ya looking for places to visit, swing on by Sweet Apple Acres and me and mah friends can show you round the place.” She gasped suddenly, “that's it, maybe me and mah friends can get our Cutie Marks as tour guides.”

“Huh? What do you mean?” I questioned as I looked towards her brother who was still glaring at me. “Actually never mind, I may see you both at the party, I've erm... got to go and have a little fly around and stretch my wings.” Maybe avoiding being beaten by Big Mac and possibly having a cloud nap I thought silently to myself.

“Oh ah see.” Apple Bloom said as her mood deflated in front of my eyes.

Oh buck, oh buck, her brother is going to kill me, gotta fly. “Yeah, erm see you around.” With this I launched from the ground as fast possible to avoid any incoming attack, and flew over some buildings and out of sight. That was too close I thought, I've just recovered from being beaten up by the Royal Guards, I don't want to endure another beating. Sighing, I decided I needed to take a nap, so decided to look around for a cloud to nap on, spotting a few in the southern part of the town. Smiling at the prospect of a cloud nap, I headed for the nearest one and flopped myself onto it. “Hmm, this is comfy,” I muttered to myself as I drifted off to sleep.

Suddenly I woke up feeling winded and in a lot of pain. I suddenly realised that I was no longer on the cloud I was napping on and instead was free falling to the ground. Fortunately though, I had managed to get my bearings and get my wings out to enable me to glide to another nearby cloud to recover.

I scan my surroundings to see what had disrupted my nap and destroyed my cloud bed in the process. Annoyingly I couldn't see any sign of what caused the situation, all I could see in my vicinity were other clouds and the only other pegasus pony I could spot remotely near me was a mail mare who was closer to the ground than to myself. Grumbling to myself for not finding the answer, I laid back down on the cloud and looked over the town below me.

Hmm, I thought. This Ponyville doesn't seem to be a place that is interesting, to be honest it seems pretty dull, well to a pegasus like me that is. I was disrupted from my thoughts when my stomach started to rumble. Sighing at the fact I had was hungry which meant I had to head down into the town below to get some food..

I raised myself up and leaped off the cloud with my wings spread out wide as I swooped down towards the market place making a few lazy circuits of the town in the process. Whilst doing so, I noticed a few more locations that may occupy me. One being a bowling alley on the edge of the town. Wow, I thought. I've actually found something that could occupy me until the party later.

Unfortunately whilst I was distracted, I failed to realise that I had entered into the market place and heading straight towards one of the stalls. I turned my head to realise that it was less than a metre away and crunch. I hit the side of the stall muzzle first and I yelp with the pain as I crash onto the ground.

“Urgh,” I groaned. “That bucking hurt.” Whilst lying in an undignified heap on the group, I became aware that somepony was standing over me.

“Yah alright there sugarcube?” came a friendly southern voice. “Yah took quite a tumble into the side of mah stall there.”

I looked up to see an orange mare wearing a Stetson, which from underneath were two emerald green eyes looking over me with some concern. “I, erm, yeah I think so,” I replied trying to get up from where I was. “Just give me a few moment and I be fine.”

“Ah glad yah seem alright, but shouldn't you get checked out at least to make sure you ain't hurt yahself,” she replied showing even more concern.

Rubbing my muzzle, I looked at her. “Yeah, maybe, I'm not sure, I probably fine,” I reply. “Oh wait was that your stall I crashed into.”

“Fortunately there's nothing for yah to worry about, yah didn't do any real damage to mah stall,” she smiled. “Nothing ah cannot mend and a few bruised apples on top of that.”

“Oh crap, I'm so sorry about that,” I replied to her sheepishly. “It's my fault, I wasn't looking where I was going, is there...”

“Ah said don't worry bout it sugarcube,” she interrupted me. “When yah have a pony like Rainbow Dash around here, the ponyfolk here get used to things like this. “Ah lost count on how many times she has crashed on mah farm, though she seems to crash into Twilights property more.

“Oh.” Is all I could verbally respond with, I was more worried that my past was starting to catch up with me. If that Rainbow pony was living around here, there was only a matter of time before I would end up bumping into her, especially since the last time I saw her was when I was in court about providing her with alcohol when she was under the drinking age. Feeling something poking me, I left my thoughts again.

“Say sugarcube, yah sure you sure you alright?” Came a southern voice. “Yah kind of got a vacant look on ya face.”

“Oh was I?” I replied. “I'm sorry, I never realised. Just I was thinking to erm... how my erm... oh yeah, I was thinking back to how my cloud suddenly disappeared. You didn't see anything did you?”

“Sorry sugarcube, ah didn't see anything like that today,” she replied. “To be honest I haven't seen many other Pegasi flying around today aside yahself and Rainbow. The only other ones that seen were the mailmare Derpy, oh and some lightish blue...”

“Soarin?” I interrupted.

The orange mare looked at me and was looking rather annoyed at me for interrupting her. “If yah let me finish, I was about to say a lightish blue mare. Ah know fine well it ain't Soarin because he always stops by my stall for some of mah apple pie,” she said proudly.

“Oh I see.” I replied sadly whilst feeling a bit disappointed that it wasn't Soarin that crashed into me. However I didn't dwell too long on this as my stomach rumbled to remind me it was hungry. I looked up at the mare with a little bit of a blush. “Say erm... sorry I didn't catch your name.”

“Mah names Applejack sugarcube,” she replied with a pleasant smile. “And what may your name be?”

“Oh, it's Rapidsnap,” I responded. “Anyway do you know where I can get some grub around here?”

“Are yah blind,” she points towards her stall that I had earlier crashed into. “Yah got all sorts of apple products available right here, and no one knows apples like the Apple family.”

“Oh I see,” I quietly replied. “To be honest, I don't particularly want anything apple based to eat today.”

“Look sugarcube, no pony comes to Ponyville without sampling apples from the Apple family farm,” she said Sternly.

“Well!” I retorted. “It looks like I'm going to be the first. Now if you don't mind me asking, where can I get some mangos.”

“Mangos?” She spluttered and starts to glare at me. “Mangos? Am ah hearing you right. You are asking me to tell you where you can get some bucking mangos? What the buck are yah? Are yah one of them bucking batpony things?”

“Erm... no actually.” I growled, “and I believe they preferred to be known as thestrals. Also mangos are nice and juicy for which I'm glad some of my thestral friends introduced me to.”

“Yah actually friends with them batponies?” She spat. “It ain't right, do yah drink blood with them too?”

“Hey!” I snarled back at her, noticing that we were start to get the attention of other ponies visiting the market. “Just because I'm friends with them, doesn't mean that I copy everything they do.” I start glancing around hoping for something to ease the tension or to help me escape, as I didn't particularly want to have a fight with an Earth Pony.

The enraged orange mare stormed right up to me and spoke directly into my ear. “If I didn't have to set a good example for being one of the elements, Ah would be kicking your bucking flank right now.”

“Look.” I spoke back into her ear. “I didn't come to this town to upset people or to get into fights. I do however don't like it when somepony insults another pony because of their race. How would you like it if I called you a mud pony.” She reacted badly to that.

“No, you look here,” she hissed. “Ah don't need feather brained ponies like you telling me that bat ponies should be treated with...”

“Applejack!” shouted Pinkie as she popped up out of a tub of apples.

The orange mare flinched and spun around to face the pink pest. “What the hell do yah want Pinkie?”

“Jackie, I just wanted to tell you that since we have so many ponies attending the party tonight,“ she babbled out. “That we are moving it from Sugarcube corner to the ballroom in Twilights Castle. Oh hi Rapidsnap, I was just about to come and tell you this next.”

I just looked at her and shook my head. “How on Equestria did you do that? I asked.

“Yah asking too many questions for mah liking,” Applejack snarled as she rounded on me. “Yah not some sort of changeling spy are yah, cos they hang around with them bat...”

“Jackie?” Whined Pinkie, “why are you being so hostile towards Rapidsnap.”

“Cos, he's acting all strange,” she interjected. “What sort of pony prefers mangos over apples. Also ah told you, ah don't like being called that name.”

“Oh Applejack,” said Pinkie sadly. “You should stop being so stubborn and learn that everypony is allowed to be different, Can you imagine how boring it would be of we were all the same. It be like uninteresting and dull and nothing will be a surprise as we all like the same things. Oh Applejack I would hate to live in a place like that,” she cried as she burst out into tears.

I looked at Pinkie as she sat there crying whilst Applejack tried to comfort her. I Smiled awkwardly at the sight. “Well since you two are busy,” Applejack's head shot up me and gave me a fierce look. “Yeah, I'm just going to go now and get something else to eat... bye.” I quickly turned and trotted off into the the market in the search of food.

Two tasty mangos and one yellow mare running away and screaming “Aargh Batpony” later I reached the entrance to the bowling alley. For a small town, I was surprised at how big the place was, actually scrub that, I was surprised it had one in the first place.

Stepping into the foyer I was hit with the strong smell of varnished wood, as the place echoed to the sound of balls rumbling down the lanes which was soon followed by crashing of pins as the ball collided with them. I stand there taking in the scene before me whilst trying to remember the last time I went bowling. Must have been a few years ago when Cloudsdale briefly had a bowling alley itself. Unfortunately the place was closed after a few days due to a couple of incidents which mainly consisted of bowling balls dropping through the clouds dropping onto unsuspecting ponies on the ground below.

I looked around the bowling alley and noticed the place was reasonably busy with a mix of different pony races. I had wondered how the other races bowled since I've only seen other Pegasi bowl, do they have something to combat the unicorns magic or something. How do earth ponies bowl with no wings or magic?

Suddenly I realised I was just standing there in the foyer like a total lemon, I trotted over to the main desk, as I approached the mare staffing it turned and smiled at me. “Good Afternoon Sir,” she called cheerfully. “How may I assist you today?”

“Oh, hi yeah I would like to have a few rounds of bowling please.” I replied.

“How many players would you like to book it for?” she questioned.

“How many?” I asked confusingly whilst looking around. “It's just me.”

“You want a lane for one person,” the mare said looking at me as if I just insulted her mother. “Isn't it a bit strange to come bowling on your own. Do you not have any friends or something?”

I shifted nervously under her stare. “I have got friends,” I stammered trying to hold back my tears. “It's just that... it's just that I they... well I don't think they want to... they don't want to be around me.” That was it, I couldn't hold back any longer, the dam was broken and the tears came out. I only wanted to keep myself occupied by a few rounds of bowling, but here I was being reminded that I was here on my own with no friends who want to be around me. I felt as if I was being judged by this mare, I just turned and galloped towards the exit crying.

I barrelled through the doors and collided with a light blueish mare who was just about to enter the place, we tumbled onto the ground in a heap. “Oh sorry sorry,” I cried as I helped picked up this mare. I quickly checked her over to see if she was fine, and I noticed she was also a Pegasi.

“It's fine,” she grumbled. “Just watch where you are running.”

“Yeah, yeah I'm sorry,” I mumbled. “I've got to go.”

“Hey are you okay?” She asked.

I looked at her and quickly closed my eyes. “No I'm not,” I quietly reply before launching off not hearing her reply. I just wanted to get out of there and just hide myself away. I needed to get myself sorted before the party. I zoomed up into the sky and searched for a cloud to hide, fortunately there was plenty of options, so I made a beeline for a big clump of clouds and dived head first into it and cry my eyes out.