The glass shatters countless times, though you are certain you only dropped it once.
She came in your window. She must have, as she's standing in the corner with her back facing the open glass and the adjacent wall - the curtains flap silently against her back. You cannot see her face, as the darkness means she is illuminated only barely from behind, and you didn't bother to turn the kitchen light on. You know that she is female from the set of her shoulders, and the way she carries her weight.
You think you're probably about to die. That she is a thief or a serial killer who had been prowling the streets for her next victim, deciding upon the only apartment with open windows in late October. You live on the fourth floor, she must have been determined. Or desperate. The fire escape had been rusted shut for years.
She draws something out of her coat - a weapon, you suppose. You can feel shards of glass resting precariously close to your hooves; if you move, you'll surely slice yourself open, but it's seeming much more favourable than the alternative. As you consider your escape route, tilting your center of gravity forward a little, she speaks.
"There will be no need to injure yourself. It's quite unnecessary."
You glance down at your hooves stupidly, as if there will be a way she could have known, before realizing you are very much standing behind a kitchen island and that she can't possibly see more than your upper body. You're considering checking the reflections in the glass kitchen cabinets before you realize that she definitely heard and probably saw you drop the glass.
The dark mare in your apartment mutters something under her breath. A horn dimly lights up with a pale blue glow, but doesn't cast enough light to make out her face. She appears to be fiddling with her weapon - you hear the sound of a match striking a few times and think immediately of a gas torch, but then her front half bursts into light like a new flame and you start violently. You feel glass pricking the underside of your hoof. Held aloft in her magic is an ornate golden candlestick, which hovers lazily by her side.
"Hello," she says pleasantly, pushing her narrow glasses up her nose, before settling her legs together primly. Your first thought is that you've never seen someone wearing a tailcoat in person before. You stare at the perfectly-pressed garment, rather unabashedly eyeing her up and down. When your eyes settle on her face, you squint very hard to make sure they aren't misleading you.
Though the candlelight throws her entire figure into a yellowish haze and draws odd shadows across her cheekbones, you're certain her blue eyes actually shimmer, though not in the way you've known those from the Crystal Empire to have. They gleam menacingly at you, framed by long eyelashes, behind red glasses. You guess that her coat is probably white away from the candlelight. Long purple hair is expertly, carefully curled around her face and across one shoulder.
Your second thought is that you don't think she is carrying a weapon. The horn on her head isn't particularly sharp, and you can't imagine a unicorn headbutting you to death anyway. "You're in my apartment," you blurt out, on the off chance she's disoriented and accidentally scaled the wall and climbed in your window dressed in her finest evening wear. She raises her eyebrows at you. The action is so smooth as to seem mechanical.
"I am, yes."
She reaches up to remove her glasses, the delicate silver chain on the arms swaying slowly, and peers at you. "I will admit, I was expecting you to be a bit more resistant." She sounds almost disappointed. "Most would be disappearing down the road by now. Of course, it never does any good, but I cannot deny myself the pleasure of a good chase every now and then." She allows her glasses to hang by their chain around her neck.
"Nevertheless, it does make things rather more tidy. I am sorry about the glass." You gape at her soundlessly, no longer trusting in your ability to say anything intelligent. She takes a few fluid steps towards you, sets the candlestick down on your kitchen island, and opens her coat once more. From the inside pocket she draws a small black notebook. She opens it to a seemingly-random page.
"Twilight Sparkle," she reads, "lives alone. Works as a barista at a small coffee house. Not religious, not particularly invested in politics or sports. No extracurricular activities. No close friends. Enjoys reading, and," - a pause, to look up from the book - "has a particular fondness for cats."
You scowl now. "Do you take notes when you stalk me?"
She laughs. "Of course not." The small notebook is turned to face you, revealing the blank pages. "I have long since memorized everything about you. The book is just for show, it makes me look organized." It is quickly tucked back into the coat. You watch it go, not quite believing what you're hearing. "What do you want?" you force out eventually. She makes a noise indicating she'd been waiting for you to ask.
"My name is Diamond," she says with a small bow. "I am here to collect your soul."
Your hindhooves slide backwards across the tiles, glass skittering musically across the surface. She is a serial killer. She has to be. "I'll call the police," you threaten weakly, glaring at her. She seems so intimidatingly casual about the whole situation, so when she smiles wryly at you in response, you swallow, and your eyes dart to your kitchen phone. "I brought the candlestick in lieu of other forms of lighting. I do so sincerely apologize, but I believe you will find your apartment's electronics non-functional for the duration of our conversation."
"You cut my wires?"
"There is no need to dirty my hooves with such a task. No, I have simply....turned them off, for lack of a better term."
Sure enough, the signal light on the phone is off. She follows your gaze. "It was not my intention to alarm you. This is simply a very important conversation, and I did not want to be interrupted."
"If you're going to murder me, stop beating around the bush and get on with it."
The being named Diamond huffs out a sigh. "I am not here to kill you. Kindly calm down." She adjusts white gloves you hadn't noticed she was wearing, no longer looking at you. You get the distinct impression that you exasperate her. Edging an inch towards the front door, you start speaking again, hoping desperately to distract her. "Correct me if I'm wrong, but the collection of ones' soul implies I will soon no longer have a use for it." The corner of Diamond's mouth quirks upward. "No, you are correct."
She suddenly looks up at you, and you freeze where you are. "The fact is simply this: you have one month to live. At the crux of that time, I will collect your soul."
When you wake, you spend a good five minutes just staring at your ceiling, listen to the gentle hush of rain falling outside. You're warm, it's Saturday - you don't have to be anywhere, don't have to speak to anyone. It's a nice feeling, one that you rarely get to enjoy. Maybe you'll finish that book you've been reading, curl up next to the radiator with a blanket. You are cheerful as you sit up in bed, untangling yourself from your thick comforter - and freezing in place as you see the pristine white unicorn sitting in the easy chair by your window. She is busy writing in a small notebook, and does not look at you as she intones "Good morning."
You're very tempted to throw your alarm clock at her, before she raises her head and offers you a muted smile. You think better of it.
"Diamond," you near-grunt, scowling at her. "Or whatever your name was."
She seems pleased that you remembered, because she closes her notebook and stashes it in her coat, giving you her full attention. "Well done! What else do you remember?" Her tone is slightly condescending. It only makes you more irritated. You turn back to the alarm clock that was almost a weapon, dragging a hoof down your face as you go. It's almost 11; you slept for far too long. Your good mood has completely vanished, along with any hope you had of a peaceful, solitary day at home.
"Fuuuuuuck," you slur.
"Language, Twilight."
You ignore her, and totter your way sleepily to the attatched kitchen to make yourself a strong cup of coffee. Your head already hurts. Diamond seats herself comfortably at the island, polishing her glasses with a small silk cloth and otherwise leaving you to your business. After several long moments of silence, invaded only by the soft gurgling of the percalator behind you, you say "Why are you still in my house?"
Diamond raises her glasses with magic, peering at the light through the glass to ensure they are pristine, before setting them on her face. You get the distinct feeling she considers your question far too stupid to dignify answering, so you turn back to your coffee and strain yourself to remember something - anything - she had told you the previous night. Something about your imminant demise, and your soul?
"Getting warmer," comes Diamond's voice from behind you. Again, you ignore her.
As your coffee finishes percolating, you come to the conclusion that Diamond isn't real, and is a stress-induced hallucination that will disappear if you relax. It soothes you somewhat, quashing down the rising panic in your chest. You pour your coffee, adding only a small measure of milk, and relish as the warmth spreads from the mug to your hooves. You inhale the aroma, and are beginning to feel a little more normal when Diamond tuts. "I expected better from you," she says, as you make your way to your living area and sink into a couch. She claims the recliner opposite and studies you over the rims of her glasses.
Though you try your utmost to pretend she isn't there, a small part of your attention remains affixed to her as you nurse your coffee and stare at the TV before you. There's a cartoon on you're not really enjoying, as it features a lot of rather annoying whip sound effects. They grate against your patience, but you pretend to be invested in the program. Diamond watches you, only blinking occasionally, and from the corner of your eye you see her expression is calm and calculating, her brilliant blue eyes dulled somewhat. While she is lost in thought, the program released several particularly-irritating whiplash sounds, and you promptly change the channel. Diamond huffs out a small sigh, and murmurs "This may be more difficult than I first thought."
Leaning forward and resting her chin on her forehooves, she studies you very closely and intensely, and speaks slowly. "Why do you think I am here? I would like to see you formulate your own answer."
Though you itch to answer something rude, you carry on pretending she doesn't exist. Diamond continues anyway, as if she is speaking to herself.
"I know you are afraid, but you are running from your problems instead of confronting them. You have always done this. It is not right. They always come back in the end, do they not? You can never escape them."
In your head, you snap at her that she doesn't know your life, and are aware of how childish that sounds. You're glad you didn't say it out loud. You take a gulp of your coffee and try to pay attention to the nature documentary on the TV. Lemurs sure are weird-looking.
Anger contorts her features for all of a second before she's out of the chair with unnatural speed, her mane flying about her face.
"Very well. Since you have made it clear you do not intend to listen to me, I shall show you the exact consequences of ignoring me," she says harshly, and her eyes blaze with fury. Space around you shimmers, like a water ripple, before tearing and melting away into inky blackness. You are still holding your coffee cup as you squeeze your eyes shut, a sinking feeling of vertigo overtaking you.
When you open them again, you and Diamond are standing in an entirely-monochromatic world, devoid of sound or wind. It is an abandoned neighborhood that you don't recognize, with broken windows and torn door hinges. An air of misery and stillness clogs your nose and throat, as if time has stopped completely on the crux of some awful event. You are sitting in the middle of a road with cracks like canyons, the tarmac beneath you hard and uncomfortable. Not a single thing around you is alive. You didn't even jolt. Oddly, it feels as though you have been sitting here forever.
"There are things," the tall unicorn says from beside you, "that you cannot ignore." She looks down at you, impassive, though a hint of irritance still gleams in her eyes.
You open your mouth to deny something, anything, but you know this is real. The dread you feel is too pressing. You do not belong here. "Why are you showing me this?" you manage to choke out, holding your mug close, clinging to the only scrap of reality you still have. "What is this place?"
Diamond simply starts walking down the empty, cracked road, without looking back at you. It takes you a moment to find your balance, but when you do, you hasten to follow after her. She is calm now, if not a little wistful. "This is where you shall end up, if you do not set your life in order during your final month. It is a place where the soul goes to be judged, and occasionally, to disappear into the void if it is not at peace. This is a purgatory, and it will be your final resting place, should you take no action to prevent it."
As you pass by the ruined houses, you catch glimpses through doorways; of beds containing ordinary-looking ponies, sitting around staring into space, as if lost. Their colours are muddy and dulled, their eyes vacant, but their faces are troubled - waiting. A violent shiver travels up your spine. Diamond follows your gaze.
"They are those who have been here the longest. They do not see each other, nor their surroundings. It is a terribly lonely fate, to be trapped forever in one's own mind."
The clicking of your hooves on the road echoes strangely in the open space. Diamond's pace does not make any sound. She has retained her colour, a bright splash of white and purple in a mess of gray. Not even you were fortunate enough to escape the murky filter of this unsettling world - the hoof you keep securely around your coffee mug is as grey as everything else.
"This is horrible," you whisper, moving closer to her. "Who would ever dream of such a place?"
Diamond hums absently in response.
"It is what it is, and it exists because it is necessary." She leads you through a broken gate to what once may have been a park, but is now full of countless headstones. "Souls that were resigned to the aether. They could not find peace, and therefore could not be judged." You stare at them blindly. The taller unicorn allows you a moment of reflection, before she says "Have you seen enough?"
You nod slowly, almost comatose, and Diamond once again submerges the landscape in darkness. Colour floods your vision, overwhelming your senses. You feel dizzy and sick as you return to your living room, but a chill remains on your skin and refuses to leave with your shaking. Across from you, back in the chair, Diamond sits stiffly and regards the coffee table solemnly. When she speaks, it is still in the softer tones. "You have only a month to live, and there are issues you must sort before you go, lest you leave a long trail of suffering in your wake. You need not do it alone. This is why I am here. Do not shirk my assistance, for I will be here whether you insist on ignoring me or not." This final statement tears your eyes from the wall to her in disbelief.
"Why? What do you want from me? Why do you know these things about me?" Your own voice sounds frenzied and slightly crazed to your ears, and you clutch your coffee cup closer like a lifeline. Diamond's shoulders sag, and she leans back in the chair once more.The action, though it should be inconsequential, seems oddly resigned, as if Diamond is not enjoying this any more than you are. Indeed, you notice that her forehead has become creased with distress, and feel a sudden surge of guilt and anxiety. It's real. You don't even believe in the afterlife, and you know it's real. You're going to die in a month's time.
You wonder if Diamond is Death itself.
"No," she says quickly, "I am merely an agent. What I want is for you to pass peacefully into utopia, where you belong. That is my job. The state your life is in at the moment will prevent you from doing that. There are people you must make amends with, decisions you must make. I came here to help you in that regard, and when the time comes, to collect your soul and ferry it beyond. That is all." She seems relieved to have told you this, for a tiny smile tugs at the corners of her mouth, and the lines on her forehead recede a little. You process this sluggishly, staring into the brown dregs of your coffee as if they contain the answers you want. 24 hours ago, you were fine. You had no idea your days were limited. Fear and irritation rise in your throat like bile. "It's far too early for me to die," you say, as much for your benefit as for hers. Diamond says absolutely nothing to combat or confirm this, merely waits for you to continue.
"I.....it's true there are people I really should contact. Square out old fights, rekindle lost friendships. I've been meaning to, but......it never seemed like the right time, and......."
"Do not be afraid, Twilight Sparkle. It is not too late."
"....and I figure I should do it sooner rather than later." You nod to yourself. "I will allow you to help me."
"Excellent."
"But I have no intention of dying nor allowing you to collect my soul."
She shrugs. "Baby steps. Acceptance is a journey, not a destination."
"You ought to quit being professionally spooky and get into the travel guide business."
Diamond looses an abrupt and short laugh, which shocks you so badly that you start, and what's left of your coffee threatens to slop over the rim. Her eyes sparkle with mirth. "Perhaps," she says with a proper smile this time. You feel emotionally drained, though you can't have been awake for longer than an hour - but as you look over at your kitchen, you see the time on your microwave indicates that many hours have passed. Sure enough, the sun is setting behind the cloud cover outside your window when you look. Asking Diamond occurs to you, but you are honestly so afraid of what you just experienced that you decide to let it lay. You don't really want to know more about what just happened. Your companion seems to sense this.
"You will not have to face that place we visited. Not now that you have accepted my help," she attempts. To her credit, it does comfort you a little.
"Now, onto business." From her coat, Diamond withdraws what appears to be a folded piece of paper. It unfolds in her hooves, extending into a list. "Here is recorded the people you must contact and settle your affairs with, as well as other things you must do to ensure your soul's safe passage beyond purgatory." The list is long; you can see the relatively small hoofwriting as the gloomy, dying light from outside shines over her shoulder and through the paper. "That many?" you ask incredulously.
Diamond smiles wryly. "Your silence has hurt a lot of people who once called you dear, Twilight Sparkle."
You grumble, and she laughs again. A pattern is emerging and you don't like it one bit. "Yeah, yeah. Laugh it up."
Diamond uses her pale blue magic to re-fold the list. "We shall begin tomorrow. For now, I imagine you must be rather shaken. I will leave you for tonight. Please do try not to worry over your passing too much, for I will say this: when fate calls, none may escape it. You did nothing to bring about this early departure, it is simply the way things are. How you act in your final month will determine how others remember you. Use the time wisely."
As the last words leave her mouth, she stands, and disappears through the door to your closet. Childishly, you follow after a moment and open it to see that she is nowhere to be found. She has left you alone to ponder her words, and consider what she showed you.
And you really, really don't want to.
But you're certain of one thing - it's too early for you to die. There is too much you wanted to do in life, places you wanted to go. Setting your coffee mug on the table, you spend the remainder of the evening ruminating on your couch about your life thus far, despite Diamond telling you not to.
You know there is no way you'll be able to sleep.
You don't mean to, but you pass out as the glow of dawn hushes over the horizon. Your joints ache from sitting still for so long, and the cushion beside you lures you ever closer, and before you know it you're waking up at noon to the faint sound of someone vacuuming somewhere. Your apartment smells like tea. You wonder sleepily if you even own tea.
As you sit up, your hair stuck to the side of your face and a textile imprint from the cushion on your cheek, you realize someone has covered you with the thin blanket you keep folded on the armchair. It's still raining outside, the glass doors to your balcony have been left open to allow a fresh breeze into the room. Stupidly, slowly, you stare at the empty kitchen island and the cabinets beyond. It takes your brain a full 10 seconds to process that something about it has changed. Where there used to be the familiar clutter of dishes and bread and assorted newspapers, now exists a clean emptiness.
You've been burgled, you reason sensibly. Someone's broken into your flat and stolen all your garbage, but mysteriously left your TV and also covered you with a blanket because you looked cold.
What the hell.
Climbing off the couch, you realize the vacuuming you heard earlier was coming from inside your flat, and that someone is using it in your bedroom. Following the cord down the hallway, you nudge the slightly-ajar door open to find Diamond inside, cleaning your room. Suspended in her baby blue magic is a feather duster and a cloth, both of which are dusting down and wiping every surface in the room while she tends to the carpet. She doesn't see you at first, or if she does, she ignores you, but you take your sweet time staring at her from the doorway. She's shed her fancy waistcoat and gloves completely. Her red-rimmed glasses, usually hanging from a silver chain around her neck, are nowhere to be found. Diamond looks so normal it shocks the words right out of you. You would almost believe she was just a normal strange unicorn aggressively deep-cleaning your apartment.
“Hey,” you croak, your voice thick with sleep, “the heck are you doing?”
It's too quiet beneath the vacuum, you think, but she hears you anyway - of course she does. She turns off the vacuum and tucks a strand of her lovely violet hair behind her ear.
“A clear environment makes for a clear mind, darling,” she lilts, “and you're going to have to do a lot of thinking these coming weeks.” The feather duster comes to attack your nose, and you swat it to the ground and squint at Diamond. She beams back. Too bright.
“You're a morning person, aren't you.”
“I'm a life person, dearest Twilight.”
“Ugh.”
You turn and skulk off to the kitchen to make yourself coffee, unplugging the vacuum cleaner as you go. Was this going to become the norm? Would you constantly wake up to this overly-cheerful unicorn using your appliances? Did she really throw out all of your coffee?
You glare down into the pristine, empty tin, which smells vaguely of dish detergent. Not a single crumb of coffee is left in any of your cupboards. She has replaced it with tea - your nose had been right.
“Diamond!” you growl. She near prances out of the hallway in response, an amused expression on her face. “You threw out my coffee.” It's an accusation, and you mean it as such. Your jaw snaps shut after the last syllable leaves your mouth. Diamond's amused smile only grows wider.
“I did. Coffee is dreadful for your health, darling, especially if you drink it several times a day. Do you know what that does to your teeth?”
You drop the empty tin onto the counter, defeated. You can live without coffee. If she's trying to get under your skin, you reason, she'll have to try harder.
Diamond inhales deeply beside you, her side brushing yours. “Don't you just love the smell of a clean house? Breathe it in, Twilight. That's the smell of sanitation.”
You glower at your reflection in the shiny back wall panel of your kitchen. Diamond has her head tipped back and her eyes closed in bliss, ignoring you, like her own cleaning job on your flat was worthy of a standing ovation.
“Smells like a lemon farted in here,” you retort, brushing her off. She tuts back at you.
“Now, now, darling. That is no mood to start your first day of work in. Today is the day we begin reshaping your life! The situation calls for a little more enthusiasm, wouldn't you say?” After a moment, her cheer evaporates, and she seems to realize her words aren't having the desired effect. Her gaze becomes measured, careful, though her expression is almost condescendingly blank. “It will not be a terribly enjoyable thing. I did not want you starting this task in a bad mood. I apologise if I overstepped.”
You're taken a bit aback by this, and immediately feel an instinctual desire to apologise in turn, but you swallow it. This is your apartment and your life. Your rules. “Yeah, well,” you mumble off-handedly, “just don't touch my stuff without asking.” She smiles in return, a small thing that doesn't touch her eyes, and you suppose it's the best apology you’re going to get. Oh well.
Diamond waits patiently for you to wake up without the aid of coffee, a feat that takes you almost an entire hour, before sitting you down at your kitchen island. She takes the stool across from you and unfolds a familiar list on the bench. “I've upset that many people?” you wonder incredulously, twisting your neck around to try to read the upside down letters. The taller unicorn snorts.
“No, some of this is notes I have taken on you. In actuality, there are only….seven people you must see.” She turns the list around for you to read.
Catch up with Rainbow Dash.
Visit your parents.
Apologise to Sunset Shimmer. Reconcile.
Find where Pinkie Pie moved to. Visit her. Apologise.
Call Cadence. Congratulate her on her foal.
Visit Celestia. Explain.
You flinch upon reading the words. A long silence passes between you. In your peripheral vision, you see Diamond watching you carefully. “This is a whole lot of things I don't want to do,” you manage weakly, looking up at her. She is resting her hooves on the counter, her chin atop them, looking at you with a twinge of sympathy gracing her features. The familiar crease has returned to her brow.
“I know.”
For the first time, you feel as if she does know, maybe just a little bit. If she really has been watching your life, does she understand the pain this list causes you? Does she know how bad reading those things makes you feel?
“Yes,” she says quietly, and you stare down at the list to avoid looking at her any longer.
“I don't know how to deal with any of these things,” comes your eventual murmur, your mane falling into your downcast eyes, obscuring her from your view. “Some of them happened years ago.”
From behind your hair, you hear nothing. Eventually the silence starts to bother you, so you look up - and find her watching you still, her face sad. “I did not promise it would be easy,” she says to you softly, “and worse yet, I did not promise you any of your apologies would be accepted. I wish I could. You must try anyway, Twilight. Please,” she adds onto the end. A glimmer of what you think is fear dances across her pale blue eyes, but it's gone before you can fully register it. Her face goes back to an expression you are far more familiar with - a carefully-composed mask of indifference. She now looks properly like the pony who broke into your house two days ago, and you snap out of your trance, ashamed you allowed her to see weakness.
“So you're saying I have to waste my time apologising to these ponies, who may just throw it back into my face anyway?”
“Yes.”
“What's the point? How would that help me at all? I'm pretty sure that would make me feel worse, actually.”
Diamond heaves a great sigh and puts her head in one hoof, like you are a foal throwing a tantrum. Anger dances warm across your cheeks. You bite your tongue. Using her magic, she folds up her list again and pins it to your fridge with a magnet. “I believe you will understand in time. For today, a visit to Cloudsdale is in order.”
The day they brought Cloudsdale down to the ground was the day the world got a little bigger. Weighed down with the demands of an entire nation’s weather, it became impractical to keep it in the sky, and impossible to hire help from the earth ponies, who had no means to walk on clouds - the unicorns were unwilling to donate that much magical energy towards cloudwalking spells. Rainbow Dash, as you remember it, had always been annoyed with the decision. At the time, she and Fluttershy had come to blows over it, and after the race card was played, their friendship ended. You really doubt they've spoken to each other since in the 3 years passed. Guilt washes over you as you think about this. After all, it’s been 3 years since you spoke to either of them, so you are no better. Diamond stands beside you at the bus stop, holding an umbrella over the two of you with her magic. Rain patters on the semi-transparent plastic above your heads. She had acquired a thick, woolen scarf from somewhere while you weren’t looking. You wouldn’t call the weather cold exactly, but a bite was definitely present in the air.
“Aren’t you the least bit concerned about someone seeing you?” you hiss to her. “I mean….should your kind just be…..walking around? In public?”
Diamond huffs. “Give me some credit, Twilight. Do I not look like a normal unicorn?”
She raises an eyebrow at you, as if daring you to answer. You make a point of looking her up and down very slowly, squinting. She scoffs, and you fight back a smile.
“Alright, if you must know, my existence is shrouded in an anomalous effect which causes regular ponies to simply not notice me unless I interact with them myself. To everyone else, I may as well be a tree, or a sign post. I am here, but I am on a level of their subconscious they do not normally notice.” As if proving her point, the bus rolled up to the stop, and the driver did not acknowledge Diamond at all as they stepped on. When she cleared her throat and paid for her ticket, the stallion behind the wheel looked at her with dazed eyes, handing her the small piece of paper as if he was in a dream.
“That’s…..really weird,” you say, climbing onto a double seat near the back of the bus. It puttered off down the cobblestone street, occasionally jostling its passengers. After a brief pause to tuck her ticket into her scarf, Diamond sits down next to you, seemingly unbothered by the swaying of the bus.
“I suppose it is, but it’s necessary. How would you explain my presence to Rainbow Dash?”
“I could go alone.”
“I don’t think you can do what’s necessary without me.”
“Wow, thanks for the vote of confidence, Diamond.”
She frowns then, and you can see your shortness has at least miffed her a little. “Sorry,” you mumble, pinning your eyes firmly out the window in shame.
It’s a short ride to the lake where Cloudsdale now resides, resting peacefully on the water. The clouds had soaked up enough moisture that they had become heavy, and as a result, no spells were needed to traverse its streets. A large stone bridge connects the island to the shore, and as the bus nears it, you can see the steady stream of ponies coming and going. Many of them are weather factory workers, but plenty are just normal citizens going about their business. It was true that most considered Cloudsdale to be a part of Canterlot now, but it was still proudly a pegasus town. Diamond readies her umbrella as the two of you move for the side doors, and step carefully into the rain as the bus pulls up near the bridge.
You don’t remember exactly where Rainbow Dash lives. She used to own her own place outside Ponyville, but after joining the Wonderbolts, she moved into the city for the sake of convenience. You remember her describing her new condo to you, insisting you come visit her there. You’d never gotten the chance; you lost touch with her soon after. You are about to ask for directions when Diamond points up the main road.
“It is this way.”
Wordlessly, you follow her. You doubt she’d tell you why she knows where Rainbow Dash lives, and you’re not sure you care to know, anyway. She kind of freaks you out. You spy her looking back at you from the corner of her eye for a heartbeat, and remind yourself to keep your thoughts in check. Diamond leads you to a large, handsome building just off the main road. “I suppose I’m not surprised a Wonderbolt lives here,” you sigh, tipping your head back to look at the highest floor of the condo. Diamond jerks her head towards the intercom, and you creep towards it, already afraid. For a moment, there is no answer to the subtle buzz the shiny golden PA makes, but eventually you hear a click, and a familiar voice calls out to you.
“Twilight?”
You grin sheepishly - of course a building this expensive would have a camera system. You can hear Rainbow Dash laughing through the speaker.
“Oh my god, you look exactly the same. Come on up!”
She buzzes you through to the lobby, and together with Diamond, you ride the polished elevator to the 15th floor. Rainbow Dash’s door is the only one in the hallway, and it’s already open when the elevator doors slide apart. She is grinning ear to ear, leaning against the doorframe.
“Well it’s about time you came around!” she exclaims, sweeping you up in a very feathery hug before you can so much as open your mouth. You can hear Diamond giggling quietly behind you. Rainbow eventually releases you from the hug, but holds you at leg’s length, scrutinizing your face for a bit with a very determined frown on her face. “Yep, she says eventually, “exactly the same. You haven’t changed a bit.” Another dazzling smile splits her face in two, and she ushers you into her flat, chattering excitedly about whatever’s in the sports’ section of the newspaper this week and settling you on her living room sofa. Diamond follows you silently, and sits down on your right. You try your hardest not to draw attention to her, because Rainbow Dash is carrying on blissfully without noticing her at all. She speaks to you as if you never left, telling you about her job, cracking jokes, and then laughing at them. In turn, she asks you about your life, and you try to be honest - you tell her about your cafe job. As you chat, you notice she has grown her mane out over the years, and she no longer brags about herself nearly as much as she did when you last knew her. You may not have changed, but she sure has.
“Still love being a Wonderbolt?” you ask her, smiling in spite of yourself. She tosses her head back and barks out a single laugh.
“Sh’yeah! Every time we perform together, it’s like….I dunno, it’s like it’s the first time all over again, you know?” Rainbow stares into the middle distance, lost in her thoughts. “Nothing could ever beat that feeling.”
“I remember your first performance with them.” You had been so proud of her - all of you were. “Fluttershy cried.” Immediately after the words leave your mouth, you snap it shut, swearing internally. You should not have brought Fluttershy up. Diamond looks at you, but you refuse to meet her eyes. To your surprise, Rainbow just laughs some more.
“No way! Really?” She leans towards you. “Nobody ever told me that! She looked fine after the show!”
You feel your eyebrows raise in shock, and you see confusion dawn on the pegasus’s face, but before you can analyze it, the front door opens. There’s a quiet jangle of keys being set down on a surface, some rustling (you assume it’s a paper bag), and then the pony you least expected to see walks around the corner into the living room and stares right at you in horror.
It’s Fluttershy.
Your mouth hangs open like a fish. Fluttershy’s jaw is clenched tightly. “I heard voices,” she says, clearly to Rainbow, but her eyes never leave you. To her credit, Rainbow Dash tries to break the ice.
“Yeah! Isn’t it great, Shy? Twilight came to visit!”
Fluttershy says absolutely nothing, but continues to pin you in place with her stare. You suddenly feel very unwelcome, but Rainbow carries on talking like nothing happened. “We were just talking about my shows, what we’ve been up to all these years. Hey, I know! Shy, why don’t you join-”
“Leave.”
This time, you know she’s speaking to you. Nothing could have prepared you for how angry she looks. This is not the Fluttershy you were friends with three years ago. Rainbow’s head jerks back and forth, from Fluttershy in the doorway to you on the sofa, in rapid succession, like one of you is going to lunge and she might miss it. Next to you, Diamond makes a sudden motion that startles you, and your head turns to her before you can stop it. She is looking at you meaningfully, and perhaps a little urgently, and you understand what she’s getting at. It’s time to go. As you stand up, Rainbow also takes to the air, hovering in front of Fluttershy.
“Come on, Shy, let’s just sit down and talk about this. It all happened years ago. We can get through this, right? Let’s talk about it together, as old friends.”
“Leave,” she says again, leaning around Rainbow Dash to glare daggers at you. The blue pegasus looks terribly forlorn, like she wants to say something, but nothing comes out of her mouth. With Diamond trailing silently behind you, you skirt around Fluttershy and Rainbow Dash and make for the door. You hear Rainbow speaking to Fluttershy in a low, frantic voice back in the living room as you close the front door behind you and climb back into the elevator. The trip down to the lobby is silent. Diamond fetches her umbrella from the rack beside the glass doors. For once, she says absolutely nothing, and you appreciate the quiet. You have absolutely no idea how you feel right now.
As you push the doors ajar, you hear frantic hoof-steps behind you, and Rainbow comes barrelling from the staircase towards you at full-pelt. “Twilight!” she yells, breathing hard. “Wait!” You pause in the doorway, keeping your face carefully blank. Diamond is already outside ahead of you. Rainbow stops to catch her breath for a second, then rushes out “I’m so sorry! About Fluttershy. I should have explained things to you earlier.” Her face is so sad, any biting remark you may have been considering dies off. You just look at her passively.
“It’s alright," you tell her. Both of you know it isn’t alright, but one of you had to say it. The blue mare you once called your friend looks at her hooves, ashamed.
“We…..we made up. A few months after you…...you know. And after that we kind of got really close, and one thing lead to another, and…..yeah.” She fumbles for words, exactly like she always has. You feel it coming before Rainbow says it, though - something final hangs in the air, and you know this isn’t going to end the way you were beginning to hope for.
“She really hates me, doesn’t she?”
Rainbow Dash does not deny it. She shuts her mouth and looks guiltily at you, but also past you. She does not look you in the eye anymore. So that’s it.
You force a smile. “I guess an apology won’t change anything.” You meant it as you apologising to Fluttershy, but the double meaning isn’t lost on Rainbow, because she flushes to her ears and looks as though she might cry. How time has warped the pony you used to know. When did she become so humble? You suppose, with slight bitterness, that it was probably Fluttershy’s influence.
“She doesn’t hate you, Twi,” she tries. “She’s just angry. A lot happened after you left.”
“So I see.”
Rainbow Dash looks over her shoulder, back at the elevator, as if she’s considering running. Worrying her lower lip with her teeth, she turns back to you. “You had three years, Twi. Three years and not even a letter to say hi. Why’d it take you so long? Why’d you have to wait so long to come see us? You could have- she might have been-”
A pause. “Things might have been different. WE might have been different.”
You smile at her again, and she winces. You know it doesn’t reach your eyes and she isn’t fooled. “Bye, Rainbow.” Her ears droop.
“Later, Twi.”
When the door closes behind you, Diamond is right there, holding the blue umbrella above your head to shield you from the rain. You do not cry. After all, Rainbow Dash had not been your friend for three years. You had only confirmed what you already knew - they had moved on, without you, and didn’t need or want you back in their lives.
“Is this what you wanted?” you say to Diamond, suddenly angry. “Do you want to see me suffer as I upset people? Is that it?” The main street, populated before your arrival, is now mostly empty as the rain continues to pour down and the sun sets. You turn on her, standing in her way. You expected her to be annoyed with your accusation, but she just looks sad. Like Rainbow.
“No,” she says softly. It is almost lost under the din of the rain. “Never.”
“Then what? Why are you here? Who are you? You owe me some goddamned answers!” Your voice rises to a shout, red seeping into the edges of your vision. It isn't fair.
“This didn’t need to happen. None of this needed to happen. You made me come here and see that and do that to Rainbow Dash and none of it needed to ever happen! You could have left me alone to die like a normal person!” You are yelling at her now. The rain pelts you mercilessly. Diamond’s face never shifts, she just keeps holding that same, muted sadness you’re coming to hate. It looks like pity. You hate pity.
After several heartbeats of her not saying a word, you turn abruptly and run off into the rain without her. Raindrops fall in your face; you can barely see where you’re going through your blurry eyes, but you somehow make it to the bus stop and onto the bus. It takes an eternity to reach your home. Diamond is not there, and you are glad for it. You shower, moving sluggishly through your flat on autopilot, before collapsing into your bed. You don’t really dry your mane properly, just leaving it tangled about your head like a storm across your pillows.
Your final thought before you drift off is that you are glad you will not have to live with the shame for long.
