Vengeance, Card Games and Magic
Chapter... What number are we up to now?
Previous ChapterNext ChapterIn the deep dark lair of Morgie93, Sydney, Australia…
“All your important files have been deleted. Have a nice day!” Tom’s laptop beeped out, oblivious to the problem it has caused. [My real name’s Tom by the way.]
“Why the frigging ‘ell did you do that for, Mum?” He shouted in an agitated tone.
His bitchy mother had wiped all of his work and notes for his fan fiction, suspecting it to be pornographic photography (even though text files are completely different from .jpgs). “You were on those social networking sites talking to those weirdo horse-wankers about that subliminal mind-fucking Japanese cartoons.” She started ranting unnecessarily. “Even though we are encouraging you to become less anti-social, we are wiping out every single piece of work you have done for the past three months out of sheer prejudice and arrogance. God is not happy and he will send you to hell for your satanic worship!”
“Do you have a problem with Yu-Gi-Oh and My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic? You are such a prejudicial crazy lady!” Tom shouted at the religious nutter, trying his best not to cuss in front of them (or at all for that matter)...
“Boy,” His ‘extremely big-boned’ father bellowed at him. “You better start praying to the lord. I fear that the devil has brainwashed your mind with these TV shows to convert you into one of those gay poofters.”
Tom couldn’t stand all this crap anymore. “If you want to be all religious and judgemental, go back to the medieval times where you can repent all you want. Leave the future for those who want to embrace it!”
“That is it!” Tom’s mother has another go at him. “You are hereby grounded from everything! No forks, no knives, no TV, no electricity, no privacy whatsoever and you shall be going to church every Sunday for the next three years!”
“Screw that! You might as well isolate me in my room until the ‘Devil’ leaves my body.”
“Done and done!” His father responded to the outcry. (Thank someone for reverse psychology!) “Now go away and shut up, demon spawn. You better hope you anus can handle the Devil’s cock up it for the illegal crimes you committed. Now excuse me whilst I download them American shows off the whatchamacallit sites.”
Marching off to his room, Thomas heaved his shoulders, carrying off his computer as he commented under his breath. “Yes, because actually having a social life is a much more heinous act compared to Internet piracy. Go and bugger yourselves. You’re the reason why the world can’t advance to it’s full potential.”
Going onto his phone after slamming the wooden slab of wood separating him from who he thought belonged in that institute from ‘One Flew Over The Cuckoo’s Nest’, he pulled up the rough outline that he used to write the chapters.
“It’s going to be all right! I just need to get focused again and pull all the information from my head. Let’s begin!”
[Thank you Ma and Pa! You get to feature in this story now as exaggerated forms of what you act like! What you did was very nice *wink*. Your fictional deaths will be quite amusing! (People are now thinking that you’re some sadistic creep.) They forced me to go to church and for that they deserve it! (That isn’t so bad…) For eighteen hours straight! You don’t know what it’s like, Brain. You don’t know… (Here’s what you’ve been waiting for. Begin the chapter so we can’t hear him sobbing.)]
Vengeance, Card Games and Magic.
Writer, Producer, Job Seeker: Morgie93
Human Suggestion Box: obsidianreaper
Master Chief Editor: RustyBucket
Chapter... what number are we up to now?:
Something Old, Something New, All Cliché.
The next morning…
The Game Shop, Domino City
Yugi woke up in his bed just like any other morning. He rubbed the sleep from his eyes and pulled the curtains back. He then sighed at the sight of the crystal clear, blue sky.
"It feels as though it was just yesterday that I was with Yami."
Of all the people coping with the loss of Yami, it was Yugi Mutou who handled it the worst. He had been crying for the first couple of weeks after his friend finally went to the afterlife. Yugi didn't just lose a good friend; it felt like he lost a part of himself, the cooler and sexier part. But life still goes on without him though, and he wouldn't want Yugi crying for his sake. All the excitement in their lives had left them since Kaiba decided to stop showing his face in public. At least Yugi had his friends with him, not to mention he now runs the Game Shop and gets all the girls. That very last part was a lie, Yugi was… I have no idea how old he is and still a virgin.
"Hey, Yugi!" a voice with a strong Brooklyn accent shouted at the window, "Is there any chance dat you could possibly open the store doors so I could, oh I don't know, start working perhaps?"
Yugi walked towards the window and looked out to see his best friend Joey standing outside the store.
"Give me a minute to get dressed and I'll open up the store." Yugi shouted out in response.
He quickly looked at his watch and realized that it was about five minutes to opening time. There was no time to waste so without any further delay, Yugi changed into his usual attire, styled his hair in the same spiked manner it always is, grabbed his deck and made his way down to open the store.
On his way down, he passed Grandpa reading the newspaper, it was probably the obituaries or something based on an archaeological discovery somewhere.
"Grandpa! It's good to see you out of the basement again."
"Yugi, there's something I want to show you." Grandpa replied in his old man voice.
"Not now, Grandpa! The store's about to go into hours now, it can wait until lunch break. And if it's that Black Luster Soldier poster again, you'll be seeing your own name in the obituaries soon enough."
"But Yugi it's about th-"
"I said not now, I have to open the store before Joey tries to kick down the door again. If it's about your heart attacks, I don't really care!"
And with that, Yugi continued down the stairs to the ground floor. From there, he opened up the doors to the store and Joey then comes in with posters, shipment orders and numerous letters.
"I see you stopped by the post office. What was the sudden rush to get here for Joey?" Yugi asked the blonde man.
Joey immediately dropped everything he was carrying to present a single letter to his friend. The sound of glass, plastic and metal breaking resonated throughout the room as it all impacted on the floor, destroying anything of major importance. He would pick that up later.
"Guess who decided to send you a letter." Joey said giving the envelope to his employer.
The envelope looked quite elegant: silver writing, no rubber stamp marks and something else that gave away who sent the letter. The KaibaCorp ensignia on the back.
"Kaiba." Yugi said to himself.
"I knew you woulda found that interesting" Joey replied to Yugi's response, "Let's see what he has to say after last time!"
Cut to last time…
“Kaiba, I’m sorry I made you read that story but may I ask why am I chained to a wall?”
Seto Kaiba slowly entered the basement brandishing a butcher’s knife and wearing a blood-soaked apron. In a dark, evil and distorted voice he said, “Did somebody say… Cupcakes?”
Back to the story…
Tearing the side of the envelope, a handwritten letter falls out of the side. Opening it up, Yugi read out exactly what was there:
"'Dear Yugi Mutou,
It has been a while since we last met. You must be missing me. If you have been reading the papers recently, you might have realized that I lead an excavation site in Egypt. I got you a souvenir, I'll give you a guess to what I found. There is something else I want to show you. Come over to my mansion at 6pm. Transport will be provided for you and your friends outside the store. I expect to see you all there.
Signed, the most powerful person alive, The God-damn Kaiba-Man
P.S. There is definitely NOT going to be a duel occurring, bring your decks and duel disks with you regardless for no logical explaination. And tell the furfag to yiff in hell for me.'
Wow, I half-expected that he would have typed up this letter, being the techno geek he is. But trust him to still be the arrogant, self centered bastard we all know and hate."
"I guess some things never change,'" Joey added on, "So what should we do now?"
"Well," Yugi replied, "Every time that Kaiba wants to see me it usually ends up in a duel and then the world is suddenly in danger. We save the world, rub it in his face and the cycle goes on. But being the gullible idiot who believes he has actually changed, I think we should go."
"But Yug, what about last ti-"
"Do you want to stay here and look after Grandpa instead?"
"...No" Joey whimpered in fear of losing the minimum wage that was his only source of income which wasn’t gambling or begging on the streets.
"Then let's get going! The writer is practically losing sleep over trying to script this chapter. Not to mention trying to make the story more funny which he’s kind of failing at."
The breaking of the fourth wall resulted in Joey letting out a "Nyeh?" to show his confusion of the reference to the irresistibly handsome writer.
[(Riiiiiight! And I am the Tsar of Venus! How are you?) A Russian king, eh? Uh… Vodka, vodka, vodka. (Gasp! Вы умственно отсталые, товарищ? {Are you mentally handicapped, comrade?}) …Sandvich? (You didn’t understand a word I just said, didn’t you?) I didn’t quite catch that, could you type it into this dodgy online translator for me?]
"Never mind, you go get everyone else while I convince Grandpa to come with us."
"Why do you have to bring him along?"
"Do you know what happened last time we left him here?"
"On second thought, after he got kidnapped and beaten up for Kaiba, had his soul stolen by Pegasus and started the whole series, he should go with us. After all, his days are numbered."
"Good, let's meet up at noon to get going to Kaiba's place to leech money off him…I mean ask to borrow stuff that I won’t return.”
*****************************
Twilight's place, Ponyville
'What was that magical disturbance last night?' Twilight questioned herself, 'There is no way that could have been normal...What being has the power to disrupt all magic everywhere? Unless... No. H-he can't be back! I must inform the princess at once!'
Without hesitation, she pulled out an inkwell, quill and some manuscript. There was no time to get Spike out of bed for this.
Dear Princess Celestia,
As you already know, there was some magical disturbance, which occurred last evening at 6:49pm. I have come to the conclusion that this was the work of Discord. I would request that extra security measures are taken to prevent his return.
Sincerely, your faithful student,
Twilight Sparkle
"Twilight, its 3am" a sleepy voice said from the doorway. Her head slowly turned to meet the small shadowy figure from the hallway. Spike, her number one assistant, slowly walked into the dimly lit room. "Why are you up so late?"
"You felt that surge of magic at dinner, surely you did, Spike?"
"Well... maybe I did feel a little squeamish. But it was probably a cold breeze. You can try to piece everything together later, once you get some sleep"
"But Spike, who knows when he'll cause another surge like this!"
The little dragon didn't pick up on the pronoun and just sighed, "You're becoming paranoid again, and you remember last time, don't you?"
Twilight knew all to well as to what happened. She got a warning from herself in the future not to worry about the future. This ended up causing the whole problem to occur as her future self's message got cut off. After a week of pacing, obsession and a lack of sleep, the day of the 'disaster' came. Realizing that she fretted over nothing she went back in time to prevent this scenario from happening. Ironically she became the cause of the problem. How did the loop in time even start? Time traveling is quite confusing.
[Agreed.]
[Sketch…]
[Get out, now.]
"This is completely different!" Twilight said, trying to get back onto the matter at hand. "Do you know anything that can cause a disturbance like this?"
Spike rolled his eyes, realising that he had no chance of getting her to sleep. He yawned, "Well, good luck with whatever it is then. Now, if you excuse me, I am going back to sleep"
And with that he walked back out of the room, closing the door behind him.
'Maybe he is right,' Twilight thought, 'I probably need as much rest if I am going to find Discord. But what if it wasn't him? What if it was something more sinister and evil? What if...' Twilight lost all concentration and instantly fell asleep onto the pile of books upon her desk.
Later that morning,
Twilight woke up just like any other morning. As she was doing her morning routine, the thoughts from last night kept resurfacing. There was no way to suppress these urge to find out what is going to happen. It continued on at breakfast, eating a bowl of oats and milk in the kitchen.
Then she finally snapped, "Why must this ridiculous notion plague my mind consistently!"
And as if right on cue, Rainbow Dash bursts through the window and crashes head first into some bookshelves in the library. Twilight immediately drops the spoon she was using and rushes into the next room. All she could see in the library was piles of books completely scattered around the place. Twilight then focused her magic and levitated the books back in their shelves in a neat and orderly fashion.
Sure enough, her rainbow-maned friend was sitting upright against the wall, rubbing her head.
"You should use the door more often, Dash." Twilight said, knowing that her friend would make a speedy recovery. "You're lucky that I keep that window open."
The cyan coated pegasus merely shrugged and got back up on her hooves. "It just takes too much time and effort to fly down and open the door." She replied to Twilight. "Anyway, everyone is busy except you and there's nothing for me to do!"
"Well... I don't know if I should tell you this... But then again..."
"Oh come on, Twi. Since when have I let you down?"
'Rainbow Dash has has a good point' Twilight thought, 'She does represent the element of Loyalty but then again she has at times tried to avoid social interaction. Maybe I went too far when I began hitting on her. How will she react to this though...? I guess I'll find out soon enough.’
"Okay, I'll tell you. Just don't go spreading the word around, this is only my thesis."
"Kay, what is it?"
"Do you remember feeling something, I don't know, unusual last night?"
"Now that you mention it, I did feel a bit tingly at around 7, but what does that have to do with anything?"
"I think that some evil entity has arrived in Equestria. The only being that we know of capable of a disruption like that is..."
"Discord..."
"Exactly"
"B-but we stopped him last time!" Rainbow Dash stuttered, "We can take him on!"
"I have already sent the princess a letter on securing the Elements and fortifying Canterlot. The only thing we have to worry is when and where he will strike next."
"Let me guess, you want me to go around all of Equestria just for the possibility that he'll turn up at any given moment?!??"
"Not all of Equestria. Discord would probably attack either Canterlot or Ponyville first. All I want you doing for now is to watch the skies and Ponyville from above. Nothing that strenuous."
"Okay then, see you later!" And with that, Rainbow Dash opened up her wings and flew up through the window she entered. Twilight looked back to her library and sighed.
'I suppose I should get to reading up on magical disturbances... and find out what he's planning. And maybe a little… something else just to keep things interesting. After this one, I wonder where I left that copy of Lesbian Vampony Slayers at?'
From the stairwell, Spike peered over the ledge to see Twilight headfirst into a first edition copy of Stequine Hawking’s ‘Quantum Physics and the Influences of Magic’. That crippled, yet highly intelligent middle-aged pony is a blessing to Equestria, even though he rides around in a flying talking chair. He sighed to himself, knowing that she would be at the books for at least half the day. This sparked up an idea in the little mind of his. Spike retreated quickly to his room and pulled up a mirror in front of him. Whilst flexing his barely visible biceps, he talks to his reflection.
“Lookin’ good Spike, lookin’ real good!”
Walking away to admire his secret photo of Rarity, the face of Dan Green gradually appears in the mirror’s reflective surface.
“Yes you are, little lizard man, yes you are.”
*****************************
Kaiba's Mansion, 8:13pm
"It's great to meet up with you again," Kaiba lied through his teeth, wincing at the sound of him being nice. "You've certainly accomplished a lot!"
"Well being store owner of the year was pretty good" Yugi replied, oblivious to Kaiba's sarcastic comment, "Though it's not as big as Duel Monsters Champion, I still made it into 'The Times' magazine for most successful small buisness."
"It was nice that you invited us to dinner!" Joey added on, stuffing his mouth with well steamed lobster, "Now cut to the chase, and what is it that you really brought us here for?"
"I just came here for the food!" Tristan said, resulting in an intimidating glare from Kaiba. After a few, brief moments, the host finally spoke.
"Allow me to provide you with a little 'entertainment' for this evening. I'd ask for everyone to make his or her way to the elevator. You can all come back to the table later" 'But not you, Yugi' Kaiba thought, trying to suppress his evil smile and look nice to prevent suspicion. Another hundred puppies dead on top of the billions that he has killed with that smile…
[Sketch…]
[That’s not what I was going to say. Keep their number out; we’re going to need them later.]
[It’s for…you know who…]
[No! Stop going off topic with obscure referencing!]
[(Please kill this one.) Do you wish to die brain? (Maybe…) Shut up!]
[To anybody and everybody, you might want to skip the part where Téa speaks, because no one really likes her.]
[Sketch, did you get my message?]
[Shut up! I always wanted to say that! (Doctor Who and The Voyage of the Damned? Talk about obscure…)]
"Excuse me," Téa asked Kaiba, breaking him from his current train of thought, "But can you tell me where the bathroom is?"
"It’s down the hall, take a right, then go through the sixth door on the left and type in the password: 9999. The door will stay open for eight seconds before closing in on itself. Deadly quantities of VX gas automatically start filling the room after five minutes. There is a respirator under the toilet bowl of each cubicle for severe cases of diarrhoea and constipation. Break the mirror of the bathroom to reveal a hidden escape route, which leads to Middle Earth. Find Gandalf and get him to give you his staff. Use it to summon the Killer Rabbit of Petoria and wipe out all the Jedi Llama Templars. Kill the guy who cut the hair of the guy who clipped the toenails of the girl who sold the crack to the hermaphrodite that taught the the guy who hypnotised that man which killed JFK, help The Doctor save the Earth for the one billionth and first time and order me a Royale with Cheese from a Mongolian McDonalds. Get me the Pinkie Pie keychain toy while you’re at it to complete my collection. Once you get back from Medieval France, tell Grüber and Hans that I will discuss the new KaibaCorp logo with them on Tuesday. Climb down the elevator shaft and Jigsaw will await you. After shooting him dead, cut off his head with this herring. That is everything that you need to know before embarking on this perilous journey. Got it?"
"Umm... Okay!" Without anything more to say, she ran off down towards the facilities. By the time she reached the door, everyone else was already inside the elevator, heading off to see the 'entertainment' Kaiba had prepared. Lined with fancy new carpets and marble walls that have a golden tinge to it, the elevator helped show off Seto’s wealth. It was a shame the elevator music wasn’t any good. {Elevator music here.}
In a few minutes time, the doors of the elevator opened and everyone stepped out into a cleaner version of what was now his workshop. Most of the spare parts and blueprints were put into boxes which had been lined up against the wall. The only thing in the room apart from them was the workbench, plenty of beanbag chairs and something covered by a thick cloth at the very back of the room.
"Ladies and gentlemen," Kaiba announced, "Welcome to my bachelor pad!"
"It looks more like a dump." Serenity replied, making Kaiba angrier than he already was.
"You could always go back to my place and see what a real pad looks like" Duke said, in an attempt to try and woo her. {Play this every single time that Duke speaks unless told otherwise by the story in order to simulate the uncontrollable levels of swag.}
"Not on my watch she ain't!" Joey intervened, "While I'm around, no one gets to date Serenity unless I say so!"
"But Joey!" Serenity protested, "I’m a big girl now! I should be able to make my own decisions as an independent woman in society!"
"Did you hear me? No one!"
"Anyway," Kaiba said, trying to get his revenge over and done as quick as possible, "Let's get on with the evening. Before I pull the cover off my latest project, I would like to give Yugi a little present."
Going over to the desk, he picked up the remote as well as the Millennium Puzzle. Placing the remote in his pocket and holding out the other towards Yugi.
"A little souvenir I found in Egypt, consider it your birthday present."
Yugi took it from Kaiba and put it around his own neck, 'Just like old times... He really has changed! Looks like someone owes me $50!'
[Oh crap! I guess I have to pay him now... Or not if his plan works… (You’re rooting for Kaiba?) That’s disgusting! Leave before 4Kids finds out the perverted things you think about. (What did I say?) Everything!]
"Kaiba, this is the kindest thing you have done for me. In fact, it's probably the most selfless thing you have done for anyone." Yugi grew slightly weary of the rich egomaniac. “Are you really Seto Kaiba or is it that gay clown impersonator from Season 1?”
"Silence, dweeb! Wait, I mean yes. And to prove it, why don't you pull the covers off the machine for me then? I’m far too rich to do manual work for myself."
"Sure thing pal, since we're the best of friends now, right?"
"Yes, friends..." 'This is really killing me!' Kaiba groaned in his mind, 'At least it will all be over soon.'
Yugi walked over to the concealed contraption and proceeded to pull the covers off it. The Dimensional Gateway System had been shined and shaped to make it look better than it was. The unnecessary decorations obviously compensating for something Kaiba will never get… All he needed to do now was turn it on.
"What is that thing?" Yugi asked, wondering why it is so super special awesome to Kaiba.
"Behold! The Dimensional Gateway System! Trademarked and uncopyrightable by KaibaCorp. But you can call it your worst nightmare!"
"Well, the name need to be worked on and- Wait, WHAT!!!"
And just as he planned, Kaiba turned on the DGS. The same mysterious orb of light appeared in the middle of the arc.
"Say goodbye to your friends, Yugi. I'm sure you will find some new ones in a world where all of Michael Bay’s films are reality. Tell Shia LaBeouf I said hello." Kaiba shouted triumphantly. Surely nothing could ruin his finest hour, or Yugi's last!
"Not on my watch, Kaiba!" Joey said as he ran and body tackled the crazed egomaniac into the portal with him.
The DGS glowed a bright red and then the orb within the gate opened forth, filling the room with a harsh, cold light. Everyone else in the room averted their eyes as the bright display of light continued to shine into the room. Yugi managed to catch a glimpse of his best friend and that bastard, Seto Kaiba, fall through what looked like a tunnel before the blinding flash. The lights died down after a few moments whilst the orb in the centre of the machine continued to glow.
Yugi collapsed onto his knees and started to cry, "Why Joey! He had more to live for! It should have been me! How could you do this to me!"
[Because I am the goddamn narrator! That plus I need to compensate for what self-esteem I apparently am supposed to have. (Bagging you out is my job!) Continue.]
"Uhh... Who are you talking to Yugi?" Duke asked, oddly enough his theme music wasn't playing when he spoke this time.
"To the monster who took Joey away from Serenity! Most of all, me! Who else am I going to hang out with now? Téa?!!"
[If you keep whining like a bitch then maybe I will make you hang out with her! (Personality snap much?) Sorry, I just get in the zone]
"Does this mean I can date Serenity now?" Duke asked Yugi, looking back at Serenity and bringing back his swagger music. {Here it is again.}
"No way! Joey would have obviously let me date her." Tristan intervened. “We should have burnt this witch a long time ago.”
"I weigh more than a duck, therefore I am not a witch. And that's not true! Serenity loves me more than anyone else here in this room."
"Haven't you been paying attention? Joey got taken away by Kaiba!"
"Um, hence I said 'in this room' you moron!"
"...Serenity still loves me more!"
"Does not!"
"Does too!"
"Stop it!" Serenity shouted at the two men whining over her, "If you really cared about me, you would stop fighting and try to find my brother!"
"And my brother, right?" Mokuba optimistically added, hoping the rest of the cast would provide sympathy for him losing his brother as well.
[Ahem...Shut up, Mokuba. I'll make YOU hang out with Téa now! (Definitely not sadistic.) Silence, fool! (Yes Master Marik, anything you say.) Marik is here? He’s way too early! (Jokes aren’t of first nature to you, are they?) I was born without a funny bone. (Very humorous.) That’s the name of the bone they say I wasn’t born with!]
"After all the things that bastard has put us through, you'll be lucky if we bring him back at all!" Yugi said, downright pissed that the little pest opened his mouth.
"He might be necessary for the plot to continue!"
"Come on!” He reassured Mokuba, “Since when have we ever needed to follow the plot line yet alone have a plot? Besides, what does he have that no one else has?"
"A way to get back with the remote control."
"Does it have extra batteries or something?"
"Not that I am aware of..."
“What was the last thing he used that thing for?”
“To watch Battleship on bu-“
"That settles things, we're ditching Joey. No questions asked."
[Hell no! Michael Bay films are not that bad! (Transformers?) That was okay… (Cowboys & Aliens?) Getting worse… (Battleship.) … (Tom?) …It’s not as if they will end up in a Michael Bay film. Besides, I worked too hard on this thing for Yugi to pussycat out! He leaves me no choice! I must send in… *shuddering in fear* her.
(Deploying in 3…
2…
1…
… Guess I came in too fa-)]
"I'm sorry guys," Téa said from within the elevator shaft, "It took me a while to guess the combination to the bathroom. They also ran out of Pinkie Pie figurines. I'll be down in a minute."
"Okay new plan," Yugi hastily said, "Everyone into the portal. NOW!"
"Don't you mean Dimensional Gateway System?" Mokuba corrected the generalization on the writer’s behalf as a foolish attempt to avoid punishment, unbeknownst to him.
[(Stop writing like that, you sound like a self-glorifying bastard.) Am I? (Okay, no more paraphrasing from Australian plays for you.)]
"Because of that comment, you stay here with Grandpa and keep Téa out. Open the portal again when she leaves to get us out."
"But Yugi! You don't understand!"
"No, it is you who doesn't understand! It's Téa! Move it, you guys!"
"Yugi, are you sure this is a good idea?" Duke questioned the logic behind this idea.
"I want you listen to my new friendship speech I wrote for you guys after my adventures in going to the bathroom." Téa's voice shouted out again, this time her voice was getting closer.
"I take that back, I see how smart it actually is."
"Last one in is a rotten egg!" Tristan jaunted Duke as he pushed him to the side and swan dived into the orb in the centre of the metal arc. The orb let out another flash of light, not as intense as the first one. Seconds later, the light reduced to the glow that the machine desperately tired to sustain.
"Someone had to go in first." Duke merely shrugged, trying to maintain his high levels of swag. "Serenity, do you want me to go in with you..."
"Too late for that, Duke." Yugi pointed out towards the portal as Serenity stepped into the orb and light enveloped the room once again. When the light receeded, both of them ran to the portal as the elevator began to retract its door. A new burst of light instantly blinded Téa, allowing Mokuba to disable the Dimensional Gateway System.
Once the DGS had been turned off, Mokuba wished he had gone with the others...
"Since no one else is here, I'll just tell you and Yugi's grandpa the new friendship speech I wrote!” Téa shouted out. “It’s two hundred and eighty-three pages long in font size one!”
"Someone please kidnap me.” Mokuba said to himself, "Anyone?"
From that miserable basement, only the snores of Grandpa, slumped back in the 60’s beanbag could be heard as the sound of Téa’s voice was too much to bear and made the writer not add it into the description.
*****************************
Airspace above Ponyville, Some time in the early morning but still at night.
[What? How should I know exactly when things happen? (You wrote it down and you’re too lazy to think of a time?) The fan fiction writes itself, I just mould it into a fine piece of art. (You failed at art in Grade 8!) Fifty percent is not a fail. After my arson experiment, there is no longer art at the school, only ashes and cremated bodies. (What the fu-)]
'Why am I even doing this? It's not like anything big happens when we get involved...'
Rainbow Dash was lying on a stray cloud lazily moving across the sky. She was tired of staring over everyone, even though she wasn't going to do anything productive today. It's quite interesting what one sees in Ponyville in the middle of the day, more so at night.
'Oh well. I could go back tomorrow and pick up where I left off. Nothing bad is going to happen overnight!'
With a beat of her wings, Rainbow Dash left the cloud and headed home for the night. Not many ponies noticed as two flailing figures fell from what was a hole in the sky. One of them drifted off towards town whilst the other continued it's descent into the thick foliage that was the Great Wilderness.
Now going over to Sydney, Australia for no reason, 10:42am (Not this world’s Sydney)
Marik Sebastian Ishtar and Florence Bakura are waiting for a cab out the front of Sydney International Airport.
[Side note: Sydney's public transport is as good as Greece's economy. The train system is quite reliable! *Wink to all of previous said note* (Subtle in-joke is very funny, wink.) Yes it is.]
"Jeez, you think that they couldn’t be any more tighter on border security there! I mean, they took my stash of Butterfingers away from me for no logical explanation. And the cavity searches, that was way too much to handle for me. Come on Florence! The taxi will be here soon!"
"I don't really care about your boring sob stories Marik, and please don't call me Florence! It’s bad enough we waited there longer than the Zorc and Pals Christmas special ran for. I don’t want any more trouble today!" He said in his usual British-like voice.
Marik, oblivious to his partner in crime’s reply, continued on talking. "It was nice of Kaiba to give back your gaydar and my rod back. After all, you still need to look sexy when traveling. You could use the extra bit of sun on you when we go to the beach and completely ignore what the lifeguards tell us to do. We may end up on television!"
"Do you realise how stupid that sounds? They might as well have a program dedicated to stories that don't even matter along with one on airport security, police officers on patrol and fat people running on treadmills. It’s why the TV here is free. And yes Marik, I definitely want to go and sunbathe to look like a lobster afterwards. Go for all I care, get terminal skin cancer from the hole in the bloody ozone layer and die in a hospital bed."
"They just say that to make pasty British people like you happy."
"For the last time, I'm not British, I'm just gay!"
"Fine then, I might as well play Bloodlines in the hotel until you finally decide to go."
"Ungh, this vacation couldn't get any worse..."
Suddenly, a wild ute with a dead crocodile strapped down to the roof pulled up in front of the two as some of the orange dust flew off the tyres. Then a man wearing a bush hat shouted out in a brain-dead like tone.
"G'DAY MATE!!! DO YOUSE NEED A LIFT TO THE HOTEL?"
"Oh bullocks," Florence swore to himself, "It just got worse..."
[Yes, Australians say youse. I think I know what I'm doing here. (You obviously don’t.) You shall be loboticised with a rusty nail if you don’t pipe down! Not you readers, just brain.]
Now we'll go over to Manehatten, Equestria
[(Why?) ‘Cause I feel like it!]
Lyra Heartstrings and Bon Bon departed the train station and stepped onto the side path of the congested streets. The overwhelming pollution from the trains made things harder for the newcomers to breathe the air.
"Wow, The Big Apple," Lyra gasped, "We finally made it!"
"And the train service was excellent!” Bon Bon added on, "It kind of makes you take that for granted how good things are here."
"You said it, now we just need to check in at the hotel, drop our luggage off and then off to the human convention!"
"But Lyra! This was supposed to be our vacation together! You promised to stop this obsession of yours."
"This is a once in a lifetime opportunity!"
"Funny how there happens to be one every year in a different place. Last year was Trottingham, before that was Canterlot and three years ago it was Fillydelphia!"
"My works on Humans in Equestria is being presented at the convention!"
"You mean those cute little stories on how they end up in Equestria for no logical explanation? As if that is a fresh idea."
"I'm going to be well known throughout the community! I may get more recognition for my work!"
“You’ll get plenty of recognition from that human ‘puppet’ you designed. We all know what it’s for Lyra. Don’t hide from the truth!”
“It’s just a horn warmer! Did you know that twenty-seven percent of body heat is lost through a unicorn’s horn. With this idea however, I will obtain wealth beyond imagination!”
"Why can't you realise that I love yo-"
"Not now! I think I see the hotel! Come on!"
Bon Bon sighed to herself, "This vacation couldn't get any worse..."
[(I don’t like it… Too much happiness… Not enough reality thrown into the mix.) There’s smog, crowded streets and trains, what more is there that you want me to add? (Political campaigns that lead to the events of the Adjustment Bureau.) And you made fun of my references, disgraceful.]
*****************************
Going over to Sydney in yet another dimension...
[(¿Qué?) Our world brain, and don’t say what in Spanish, people can’t bother translating back and forth. (Oh! Oh.)]
"Yes Saker, I'll get the next chapter over to you soon enough...
No...
Yes, I completely screwed that section up…
…Then blame the bloody pope for providing the arrogance my parents have while you’re at it!
...Saker, SAKER! ...Just shut up for a second while I explain the new chapter to you...
Yes, that is what exactly happens...
Don't worry about the fourth wall, they can't physically breach it...
What do you mean that it needs more bacon?!!
...Alright! I will write us into the story! Mono has to come with us...
I don't care if Chris attempted to kill you with that piece of cardboard. He's tagging along and that’s that! Although, he does next to nothing, he's apart of the production team...
As if that will ever happen!...
…Greece recovering from their economic problem? I thought you said the story being true could happen...
Foreshadowing? What’s that?...
I'm sending the chapter to you now...
Okay, see you Monday...
If I haven’t died yet."
Morgie quickly hung up before his friend could further delay the release of the chapter onto the website he is going to post on. Gazing back at the semi completed chapter, he muttered to himself in thought.
"Now, where was I...?”
Then abruptly, his stomach produced a low grumble from the lack of food after eight days of re-writing. Raising his hands in the air, he shouted, ”By the power invested in me by the Gods of Fan Fiction and Card Games, I summon the Pizza Hut delivery guy!”
In a brilliant show of electrical static discharge, the pizza delivery guy appeared in his room, holding two bottles of Mountain Dew and a stack of pizzas from the cloud of smoke coming from the power socket overloading with awesomeness. Mother of all utility bills this quarter, check.
“Mr Morgan, is it?” He asked in a confused manner, “Here are your four extra large Pepperoni pizzas along with the Mountain Dew. That comes down to fifty-seven, eighty-four plus tip.”
“No problem good sir. Let me get my… oh.” Thomas halted his sentence as he opened up his wallet; only to find it filled with I.O.U.’s from his parents. They put his allowance in the offertory again! What pissed him off was how Jewish his parent’s mosque was with eight mandatory offertories of twenty dollars or more. And they’re meant to be Roman Catholic, not some weird religion like Taoism.
[(How did you top your religion class with all of that crap?) I used logic as my answer to everything.]
Regardless, there was no way he could pay the pizza dude back.
Grabbing his green briefcase, he sent the case flying into the pizza guy’s skull, rendering him unconscious and causing slight fractures in the bone. Using a hammer space portal directly from the briefcase, Tom opened it up and sent the man into the endless void within. After the initial shrieks of terror subsided, he opened the greasy lid of the pizza container and consumed a slice of the meaty, cheesy and oily wonder that was his pizza with gusto.
“Italian people are geniuses! Apart from Mussolini, inventing taxes, killing Catholics and then becoming Catholics, they’re okay in my book.”
[Attention all, we now have outro music!
(Really? This German crap? Put something good on!) Later, Uncle Fabio has business to attend to. (What the fucking he-)
It's so confusing! It's so crazy! It's so cliché! It's the Super Mario Brothers Super Show! (No, it is not and take off the fake moustache, you’re only fooling Tristan.) Okay… Anyrandomnoun, I made this slightly funnier in 34.8 days flat. I am evil for having that extreme stereotype of what the world thinks of Australia based off Jack Atlas by LK. (LK being LittleKuriboh for people who don’t know. He’s the guy that Morgie over here stole ideas from). Those are all lies! I merely borrowed them and placed them into a story. Kanye West does that with all his songs and you don’t see any lawsuit cases against him or a loss of loaylties. Like I said, this is a crossover of a fan-based parody of a children’s card game and a children's show supported by grown men and women. (Nothing weird about that; I don’t see how your parents hate this kind of stuff.)
To add interest, Anthony Saker (Sketch, I think…), Chris Monoghan (obsidianreaper. He stole that name, didn’t he?), and I (Morgie93, The most special one of them all.) will be in the story! (They got permission, so it’s legal now.) Even though we get ki-No spoilers for you! That's right, I ain't tellin' you nothin'! Not even why Marik, Florence, Lyra and Bon Bon are in this. (Despite what obsidianreaper clearly said about avoiding any Bakura related fan fiction.) Yeah, well forget what he said! It will help the story become more random and shall provide more in jokes. One more thing, don’t get mad, but most of what I said in the first chapter’s Authour’s Notes was a lie. Beavis and Butt-head along with a few others will be in the story.
Next chapter... This is going to be very interesting. There’s currently more space for that than the inside of my brain. (Hey! Insults and negative comments do count for something!) Nah, I'm not that strapped for ideas. (Unlike your wallet in terms of money.) Not cool.
Until next time,
Morgie93, away!
(By the way, this guy is a quarter Italian but the intelligence he inherits belongs to me!
Signed, Morgie93’s Brain)
P.S. {The part I was too lazy to add into the commentary earlier} Just don’t mind the PMSing bitch that is brain [ ( ) ] or Sketch’s weird statements < >. It’s that time of the month for her all the time. That’s meant for brain not Sketch by the way; he’s too awesome to insult.
Here's a fancy YouTube clip to end with as a present. Ha ha! New Zealanders.]
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