The voices

        With Twilight in the room with him Colt couldn’t very well be alone with his thoughts…

        “You could just sit outside and watch the door, I’m not jumping out the window you know. I can’t fly or perform magic.” Colt requested as Twilight watched him from her chair with Spike next to her, munching on some jerky.

“I don’t expect you to commit suicide, I expect you to calm down enough for some introspection, and hopefully realize how your actions have been incredibly childish, disrespectful, and even violent.”

“God, when did you adopt me?” Colt asked sarcastically.

“When you made it clear that you cannot go without adult supervision.” Twilight answered simply.

“Fine, I hope you find that chair comfortable cause you’re gonna be here a while.” Colt said as he pulled out his phone and put in his ear buds. ”Now I can’t hear you.”

While the fact that they had wires was an oddity to her, given the context of sound blockers, Twilight interpreted the objects as ear plugs of some kind. That was fine, she merely had to make sure he wasn’t going to be aggressive.

With his phone is his hand now he hit play on his music library which contained eighteen hours of music, his ear buds began to play the music and it echoed throughout the quiet room.

Twilight, for her part, could only assume that the noise she could hear would only be louder for Colt, completely ruining his request for silence. Sighing, Twilight cast a noise nullification spell around herself and Spike, blocking the noise out, and she began to dictate a letter to Celestia about the Anon’s recent behavior.

Spike sent the letter and several minutes passed before a bright light enveloped the room, blinding everyone in it, including Colt despite the fact that he was looking away. Eventually the light faded to show a very upset-looking Celestia, soon followed by Princess Luna.

        Colt just turns up the music and tries to pretend he isn’t there. Unfortunately, this dismissive behavior was noticed by Luna. She lifts Colt up off the ground and brings him eye to eye with her. Now staring the creature in the masked face, Luna snorted heavily, anger very clear on her face.

“Just let me die already.” Colt stated submissively.

Luna snorted again. “Make good on your threat and I would certainly oblige!”

“Or we could skip the whole self defense thing and sweep me under the rug and pretend I never happened.” Colt suggested.

“There is no self defense in justice.” Celestia informed calmly. “Nor would killing you help any of us. We are not going to simply forget you either. We will send you back if possible, but until then you will follow our laws, you will treat others as you want to be treated and you will not ever deliver another death threat to any of my subjects. Do I make myself clear?”

“Fine…” Colt submitted “Anons don’t kill anyways.”

“Then don’t make threats that imply you will!” Luna yelled at the masked face of Colt.

“I didn’t mean it like that, I meant that things often get out of hand and things end badly which is why I wanted to walk away and stop creating a problem, but Twilight insisted she follow me.” Colt stated.

“Actually, as I recall reading...” Celestia levitated Twilight’s most recent letter to her face and began to read. “Twilight was reprimanding you for making insults and refusing to be civil. You then consider the reprimanding to be uncalled for and then say ‘This is how murders happen’ heavily implying that what had just occurred is reason to kill another sapient being in cold blood.”

“I was meaning that I was going to be the victim...Anons have been targeted before, even by those who protect us. I was afraid of what she could do, she has magic, I’m a man in a mask.”

“You certainly showed little regard for that earlier.” Twilight scoffed. “You continued to be a pain. You didn’t start acting like any sort of victim until I told somepony what you had done!”

“Fine, throw me in jail if you want. I’ll accept my sentence.” Colt said.

“You will not be thrown in jail, you will be reformed.” Celestia said calmly. “You will learn to treat others with respect, and to take responsibility for your actions. You will study our laws and follow them like any citizen of Equestria. As of now, you are considered a subject of ours and therefore will be treated as such. Should you disobey the laws you will be punished. And any mentions of somepony being killed by another will be dealt with very harshly. Are we understood?”

“Fine, only if she never uses magic on me again.” Colt bargained.

“That’s fair.” Twilight agreed. “Just realise that the only reason I used magic in tandem with disciplinary action was because you refused to cooperate and insisted on acting like a total jerk.”

“Aren’t there rules for using magic on non-magic users though? You could easily blast me to bits probably.” Colt said nervously.

Luna scowled and dropped Colt to the floor as she teleported away without a word. Twilight spoke up with “I have plenty of control over my magic. In fact, the amount of magic needed for any kind of killing spell would be astronomical, impossible for any normal unicorn. As for using magic to simulate things such as shaken foal syndrome... for one you are not an infant and seem to be mostly developed, therefore simple violent shaking wouldn’t cause any real damage. Getting on a roller coaster would jostle you more violently than I did.”

“Fine, but if you ever try that again I’m jumping and hoping for the best.” Colt stated as he pointed towards the window.

Twilight glared. “It, and its like, will never happen as long as you are civil and respectful to others.” Twilight said. “Remember, all I’m doing is replying to your actions. If you are rude without reason, you are going to be treated like a petulant child. If you are kind and courteous, you will be befriended. You get what you give.”

Celestia nodded, face expressionless.

“One last question...What can I refer to you as since Twi here won’t let me think of one on my own?” Colt asked the diarch.

“Anything that can’t be misconstrued as an insult of course. Simply think before you speak.” Celestia advised.

“Can I call you mommy?”

Celestia pauses, again at a loss for words. “Any... particular reason why you’d want to call me that?”

“Because calling you daddy would be awkward.” Colt said, eliciting a short laugh from Spike.

“Yes, I suppose it would...” Celestia admitted, giving a warm smile but no laugh or chuckle.

“Also as a quick lesson in anon culture, we playfully insult each other as a way to talk, even among friends we add little jokes in for the fun of it with no ill will behind it. I’m stuck in my ways and forgot that I’m not home anymore.” Colt admitted.

“That... is a very broken system.” Twilight pointed out. “But I suppose it’s alright as long as you’ve learned your lesson. You just need some time to adjust, and that time will be given of course, but for now I’d like it if you just apologized for calling me.... Twihard. It sounds insulting somehow but it makes no sense, really.”

“Do you want to know why I dubbed thee ‘Twihard’?”

“I guess I could have worded that as a question a bit better, but yes, I would.”

“On the internet spawned a famously bad series of books about sparkling vampires and werewolves and one of each falls in love with a female anon, it’s die-hard fans are sometimes referred to as Twi-hards, for their devotion to a bad romance novel series. Your name being twilight made me think of that.”

“That... makes no sense. Why would a vampire or a werewolf... do anything but hurt another creature, let alone fall in love...” Twilight argued in confusion.

“Yeah, and don’t even get me started on the story that came out of it’s fandom...ugh, so bad.” Colt shuddered. “It’s about a mental billionaire who convinces a girl to sign a contract to be his sex slave which included whips, chains, and paddles….Please tell me my world isn’t the only one that has crappy books.”

“I’ve... read some ridiculous children’s stories but I’ve never encountered one like that before...” Twilight said, getting a little green in the face.

“That’s just messed up.” Spike added.

“Wanna read it for laughs? I got a copy of it.” Colt asked.

“Ah, no, no I’m fine.” Twilight insisted.

“Well, it seems I’m not needed here. I’m glad we came to a peaceful solution.” Celestia said as she teleports away.”

“Damn, I wanted to see if she wanted to read it, I read it and found it hilariously bad, I got over a thousand books if you wanna read sometime.” Colt offered.

“As long as they’re not anything like those books, sure.” Twilight smiled before noticing the clock. “Oh, school's almost out. We should get there in time to meet Cheerilee if we leave now.”

“Most aren’t, my favorite series follows a powerful wizard who’s going to a school to learn magic and along the ways saves old family friends from wrongful imprisonment and defeat the dark wizard Lord Voldemort.”

“That sounds... interesting. I assume since it’s fiction they have a different magic system than ours?”

“I have no idea, I don’t know much about your magic other than your picking me up and shaking me.” Colt replied calmly.

“Wait, you have your own magic system? How does it work? Is it similar to griffon magic?” Twilight asked. “Come, I’ll show you to the schoolhouse, we can talk as we walk.”

“Fine, but in my world there is no magic, it’s not real, we use technology to survive.” Colt answered,”And griffons haver magic? I thought they were just animals?”

“While some are rather barbaric, it’s mainly from their carnivorous nature. Pygmy Griffons are the only subspecies of Griffon that has have magic similar to ponies. The rest of them are fairly magicless and therefore have integrated with ponies in order to advance in society, the isolationist griffon colonies usually take the longest to form proper cities due to a lack of interactions with ponies.”

“Huh, works for me, and I do have one thing to say about earlier…” Colt began, “I’m ...sorry”

“Excuse me?” Twilight pardoned herself, having not heard the apology.

“I said that I’m sorry.... It’s just that this was a lot to take in and well...I don’t think before I speak…” Colt admitted not looking at Twilight.

“That’s fair I suppose.” Twilight mused, walking along the dirt path to the schoolhouse. “Just don’t act like... like...”

“A total and utter prick?” Colt finished her thought.

“I wouldn’t use those exact words, but that’s accurate.” Twilight said. “Though I must insist that you hold your tongue a bit more when in school. Just because you know vulgar language doesn’t mean you have to use it.”

“Fine...Also how old are you and Spike? H looks like he’s five, but he said he had a graduate level education, are you both eggheads?”

Twilight scowled at the nickname but did nothing else besides respond. “We are not eggheads, we are well-read. I’m twenty-four, and Spike is sixteen.”

“What stunted his growth then? Shouldn’t he be at least a little taller than that?” Colt asked.

Twilight gave Colt a look, confused for a moment. “Ah, right, you don’t know much about dragons. For one, they mature physically very slowly since their lifespan is hundreds of thousands of years. Also, since Spike was raised as a pony and not a dragon he’s never developed the hoarding mannerism that other dragons have. If he had, by this point he’d be several stories tall if it was severe, maybe about four-and-a-half meters tall if it were kept in check. After a brief episode however, dealing with hoarding not being kept in check he’s given up any opportunities he’s given to grow up any faster than what he considers natural progression.”

“I feel bad for Spike though…” Colt said looking away from Twilight.

“Why’s that? He’s doing perfectly well if you ask me. His mental state is, compared to other dragons, thousands of years beyond other dragons his age... supposedly.”

“I just feel bad for the kid since he’s going to outlive his friends here. I’ve been to many funerals, it doesn’t get any easier losing a friend.”

“I’d rather we not talk about that, especially to Spike. He’s still a child as smart as he is, and as such I don’t feel comfortable having to explain to him that he’ll end up being forced to make new friends.”

“Fair enough. So… are we almost there? These shoes are kinda old and don’t provide much comfort when walking.”

“That red building over there is the school.” Twilight said, indicating said building over the next small hill. “And if you need shoes we can always go to a farrier later.”

“What’s a farrier? I’ve never heard that term before.” Colt asked.

“A farrier is somepony who makes shoes specifically for the individual so they’ll fit perfectly and offer protection for quite a few years.” Twilight suggested.

“Also I need some more clothes if I’m going to be here for a while, maybe a suit, an anon is nothing without a suit.”

“Very well, I know somepony who can help with that. But for now, we’re here.” Twilight said, presenting the building as they entered.

“Okay, I’m going to button up my coat before we go in though… I don’t think my shirt is school appropriate.” Colt said.

“Well, how bad is it?” Twilight asked.

“How bad is what?” asked a light cerise pony with a two-toned pink mane and tail.

“Nothing!” Colt said quickly.

“Oh, hello. Are you my new student?” Cheerilee asked with a warm smile.

“Indeed he is!” Twilight responded happily. “And I’d be glad to tutor him if the need arises.”

“Why, thank you Twilight that’s very nice of you. So, your name is Anon?” Cheerilee aimed the last part at Colt.

“What subjects do you teach exactly or are you a jack of all trades kind of teacher?” Colt probed.

“Well, there are a few courses I’ve studied but don’t teach as a profession such as biology and such. I’m a grade school teacher, so I’m technically overqualified for my job but out here in this little valley town I’m the best they have.” Cheerilee smiled, rolling her eyes.

“Do you teach calculus? I need to brush up on my math skills.” Colt asked.

“I know it, but do I teach it? Heavens no, my class is still in third to fourth grade, they aren’t ready for a full course on calculus.” Cheerilee explained.

“Okay, I’m mostly interested in history though, how much of that do you cover?” Colt inquired

“I teach plenty of history, though you’d need to catch up with the class, I’m willing to have you enrolled tomorrow but keep in mind that you will be behind, so I suggest you take Twilight up on her offer to tutor you.” Cheerilee suggested. “I’m sure there’s lots for you to learn before you catch up.”

“Okay, can you give me some names of books you guys use so I can catch up? Twi, you have general education books right?”

Twilight blinks before facehoofing. “Right, I forgot you haven’t seen my library... Yes I have multiple copies of textbooks on subjects of all kinds for all age groups.”

“Sweet, maybe we can do a book exchange, you get to read some of my books and I get to read some of yours.” Colt offered.

“Maybe after you’ve caught up with the other children.” Twilight replies.

Cheerilee pulls out a piece of parchment and hands it to Twilight. “Here are all the subjects and lessons I’ve already covered. Anyways, I need to get home soon. My garden needs attention and there are a few weeds to take care of.”

“Okay, do you have any carnivorous plants, like a pitcher plant or a venus fly trap?” Colt asked.

“No, our climate doesn’t allow them to grow here.” Cheerilee replied. “I don’t have any exotic flowers in my garden actually, I prefer low-upkeep plants since I don’t spend much time in my front yard anymore.”

“Okay.” Colt said.

“Well, I have books that cover all of these so I should be able to help Anon catch up, it may take a few long study sessions though.” Twilight said, scanning the list and tucking it under her wing to carry.”

“Well I have math on lockdown but the rest I would like to learn, mainly english and grammar skills.”

“English?” Cheerilee asked confusedly, she looked to Twilight who shrugged in response. “Is that... a language?”

“That’s what we’re speaking right now, unless you have another name for it.”

“Well, we call it Equestrian, mainly because it originated from early Equines, who passed it along to other species and it has become the most widely-spoken language in the country and is even spoken in surrounding areas.” Cheerilee educates. “The other popular languages are- oh, sorry, I didn’t mean to get off-topic, I guess that’s what happens when you’ve been teaching for twelve years.”

“It’s okay, I get off topic a lot.” Colt admitted

Cheerilee left the schoolhouse followed by Twilight and Colt and the three split up, Cheerilee heading to her house and Twilight taking Colt around Ponyville.

“I’d like you to meet my friends, the first one is-”

“Hello!”  A pink blur launched from absolute nowhere latched itself onto Colt for a ‘welcome hug’ before bouncing off onto the ground revealing a very pink, vibrating pony.

“Holy shit! Where’d you come from?!” Colt asked.

“I came from over there!” Pinkie says, holding out a hoof to point in the general direction of the Pie family rock farm.

“Okay then...And what’s your name?” Colt questioned the pink pony.

“I’m Pinkie Pie, the premier party pony, and you are in need of a party welcoming you to Ponyville!”

“What kind of party? Will there be vodka?”

“For a welcome party, are you crazy? I’m inviting the entire town, including foals. I only made that mistake once and I swore to Granny Pie that I’d never do it again, I mean can you imagine how much damage hard drinks can do to a kid? Have you ever seen one drunk? It’s so sad when you realize you let it happen, no not even Berry Punch lets her kids drink and she and her husband own a bar! Have you been to the Frothy Mug yet? It’s amazing, I go there all the time, Berry is such an amazing mare. She can mix a drink that’ll make your brain go ker-splooey with how sweet it is, or so sour your nose implodes! What do you like? Sweet or sour? Or both? I’ve tried both and I ended up-”

“Hey Twi, wanna hit the bar later?” Colt interrupted.

Twilight pondered for a moment. “Well, maybe, but something light, you’re going to be studying later.”

“Kay, so Pinkie, what do you do for a living?” Colt questioned.

“I’m a baker, like the Cakes, they own Sugarcube corner and I rent the upstairs room. I’ve been told that if I didn’t get my cutie mark for throwing parties I’d get one for baking. What do you think it would look like? Maybe a cupcake or the MMMMM or a-”

“What’s a cutie mark?” Colt asked.

“I’ll cover that later, actually.” Twilight said. “For now, just a simple explanation will do. A Cutie Mark is, in very basic terms, a symbol on a pony’s flank that displays what they are best at or meant to do. There’s a lot more to it than that but the details can wait.”

“So it’s like a tattoo? I got two of them then if that’s the case.” Colt said as he rolled up his sleeves revealing two tattoos on the upper part of each arm.

“Well, no, a Cutie Mark is earned, it’s not as easy to get as a tattoo. Furthermore, a Cutie Mark is a sign of maturity. If you ask me anypony who pays to have their body irreversibly marked for the sake of having one is like defacing your own body.”

“Well, I like them so that’s all that matters.”

“So what does Error 404 mean?” Pinkie asks, looking at Colt’s left shoulder.

“It’s a computer joke, error 404 means that a file wasn’t found, so error 404 tattoo means the tattoo file wasn’t found.” Colt explained the best he could.

“I still don’t get it...” Twilight said, confused.

Pinkie Pie shrugs, smiling. “Well I guess you’re not supposed to, the ponies I know who get tattoos, do it for themselves to enjoy. If others like it then that’s just a boon.”

“Yup! The other one is the eye of one of my old pets, sadly she died of intestinal problems.” Colt said.” So I got it in memory of her.”

“Isn’t that a bit morbid?” Twilight asked, quirking an eyebrow. “Who wants to remember that somepony died?”

“I don’t think so, I had her ashes in a miniature urn back home. She was my favorite pet even though she almost bit off part of my hand.” Colt explained.

Pinkie coughs. “Anyways, I better go set up your party.  I’ll see you later!”

“Okay, so who’s next?”

Twilight ushered Colt further down the path. “You said you need a suit. Well while Pinkie is setting up your party we’ll go see Rarity. She designs and makes clothes for a living.”