Red and Black 2

"So… why do you have tentacles?" the zebra asked, looking at Ember warily. "Last time we met, you didn't sport such… things."

Ember frowned. "Same reason your brother went mad, except I didn't make a deal," she replied. "I was stupid enough to get drunk."

The zebra nodded and turned to Koto. "Whatever happened to your horn?" he asked. All that garnered was a flinch and ears folding back.

"I say we just relax for right now. It's what the sauna is for, right?" Patient interjected, causing the others to look at him. Silence hung for a few seconds before everyone nodded. "Alright then." Then someone began knocking on the door from the other end. He turned to the door and hollered, "Come in."

The door opened, and in cantered the smallest changeling with mule-like ears Patient had ever seen. This one was unusually pale; stark white instead of ebony black, further accentuated by a broken horn and a foal-sized body. It was more emaciated than even Patchouli, with knees bulging out and spinal vertebra jutting along the back. Its red ribs, carapace, wings, mane and tail were the only things that dared keep some semblance of color. The icing on the cake was a split grin stretching from ear to ear, and blackened eyes housing glowing, beady orbs.

The door slammed shut behind the changeling. It cantered over, seemingly unaware of the gaping stares it received, and proceeded to sit next to Patient. "First day of relaxing… and yet the stares are worth it," it chirped in a raspy, barely feminine, and echoing voice.

Ember scooted away from the changeling, and towards Tenmei. "Patient… give her a wide berth," she muttered. Patient didn't need to be told twice; he scooted away from the changeling as well.

“Uh… hi?” Patient attempted to give the smallest resemblance of a creeped out smile. The changeling nodded to him, and would have smiled back if it were not carved into her face.

Her orbs fell onto him and glimmered a bit. "Hello to you too." Patient noticed a small necklace adorning the changeling's neck; how he missed it, he wasn't sure. But it had three heads, six wings, and two horns.

"What is that?" the zebra asked, looking towards the necklace. The changeling lifted a brow, and the zebra lifted a hoof to gesture to the jewelry.

The changeling turned to the necklace and nodded. "Oh, this thing. Just means I'm a colonel of the Valkyrie Brigade. This was the only thing that would fit me," she replied. She turned back to Patient and added, "Lance decided to give me a break. You expect me to fight much by myself?"

Patient shook his head; the logic of that decision was so painfully obvious he wondered how the Royal Court wasn't in on this yet. "What's your name… and what are you?" he asked.

"This is gonna sound strange, so bear with me." Once the changeling was sure she had everyone's attention, she sighed deeply and answered, "Katie Rubywing, frost wraith."

Ember blanched. "Don't have the shoes, don't have the shoes…" she muttered. Katie rolled her orbs.

"They're at the gates. It's fine." Katie lifted a hoof and waved it dismissively. "Why bring my weapons if I came here to have a good time?"

Patient simply nodded. “You know what, after the shit that I saw at the changeling hive, and the shit I saw in Asgard, I’m not even surprised anymore,” he said in a monotone voice, then added an exasperated sigh after that.

"You sound like you took a cheese grater dildo to the ass," Katie snarked, her head tilting a little to the side.

“I think the only one who’s took something like that was that one alicorn that Ember—” Patient was cut off when a tentacle uncoiled and suddenly thrust itself into his mouth.

Ember rapidly shook her head, her eyes twitching. "No, no, no… nononononononono… no. Don't want that going around and being common knowledge… NO."

Katie's wings spread and buzzed. Patient noticed she had four instead of the usual two. "No need to be upset now. No tears need be shed; you only need to dream. Every hit squad knows how you came to be as you are," she stated rather unhelpfully. Her orbs shifted to look at Koto and she added, "Except maybe the Task Force."

Ember's face drained of its color, and her jaw soundlessly dropped open at the implications. Katie went on, her tone taking on an amused note, "Oh, yes. Only other ones who don't know are the Canterlot elite and the upper crust families scattered 'round Equestria." Ember sat there, still stunned and pale. "All they know is you have tentacles and a third eye, at best."

The zebra nudged Tenmei with a hoof, who then nudged Ember, which caused the tentacle in Patient's mouth to slip out with the grace of a wet, limp noodle.

“Why the fuck do you taste like ramen?” Patient asked immediately after, disturbed only by the sensation on his tongue. Ember couldn't answer, as the implications of Katie's remark still took precedence in her head.

"Is she alright?" the zebra asked, looking at Ember with a concerned frown.

“She’ll need a minute,” Patient reassured the zebra.

"On dirait qu'elle a besoin de plus d'une minute,” Koto chimed in with a worried look.

”It looks like she needs more than a minute.”

"Well… why not take it easy today?" Katie chirped. She lifted her forelegs without toppling forward and added, "So… how was your day today?"

“My whole body hurts,” Ember simply put.

*********

The hours waned, and the sun started setting when the group left the spa with their weapons and parted into groups to do things. Katie went with the zebra, but why Patient didn't know nor care about. Koto and Tenmei went elsewhere, to the far side of town.

Patient and Ember found themselves in the other side of Canterlot; close to the palace and standing in a line of ponies who were gathered in a fancy post office. The columns around them were painted in gold, while the floor was deep violet. The counters had silver and brass accentuating moons and suns, and the post-office workers had half-lidded eyes that suggested they were bored out of their minds.

Many eyes darted to Ember, though thankfully their owners kept any comments they had to themselves. Ember fixed her gaze towards the front of the line, where an unruly unicorn stallion was yelling at a worker and waving a poor orange tabby cat with a stamp on its forehead in unsteady magic.

“Just ship the damn cat already! Ship it to the Bahamares!” the stallion yelled, his voice slurred so much it reminded Patient of when Charlotte decided to have some booze. His unkempt lime green mane and dark purple coat, which held roots that were neither color, did little to suggest anything to the contrary. "I don't care if you have to lop off its legs and pass it off as the friggin' cat the Brigade has! JUST SHIP IT, DAMN YOU!"

The worker frowned with ears folded back, eyes fixed on the cat as it began mewing in protest. "S-sir… I-I may need to call security…" he stammered.

Patient groaned internally and approached the customer. “I know someone who can ship the cat without having to mutilate it.”

“Oh you do? That’s freakin’ awesome man! Why don’t you take him? His name’s Phobos!” the stallion proclaimed, unsteadily turning around to face Patient with such a vacant, vapid gaze he had to stiffen to keep from stepping back. Without warning, he thrust the orange tabby cat to Patient and stumbled out of the building. Ember watched him until he left, and snorted before turning to Patient as he found a cat on his withers.

Phobos meowed again before rubbing his head against the back of Patient's neck, removing the stamp stuck to him in the process. Patient's horn glowed, and in a flash of light he conjured a sealed envelope that had an address, a stamp, and even a small wax seal on the back. Then he conjured a small, open bag filled with bits.

“Please send this to Ponyville. It’s for my fiance,” he told the post-office clerks, who nodded and threw his letter in a hopper. The one with folded-back ears turned to Phobos.

"Sir… could you take the cat? I think the poor thing's suffered enough. Here, a can of food, free of charge." The worker levitated a can of tuna from behind the counter, one perforated with dents that did not bust it open. "That… crazy stallion threw it all around…"

Patient took the can and handed the bits over in exchange. With a nod, he turned to Phobos, who meowed at him with a purr. Ember heard hoofsteps outside the building, faint but noticeable all the same.

The two wandered back outside, where Tenmei and Koto were waiting on them. Koto immediately noticed Phobos and squealed, running over to pick up the cat with her hooves. “Kare wa tottemo kawaii!”

Phobos meowed and licked Koto on the nose, garnering a giggle in response. Patient wondered why there were only two atomic harmony bombs dropped.

Tenmei donned a grin and turned to Patient. "Ydych chi wedi gweld y ceffyl meddwi?”

”Have you seen the crazy drunk stallion?”

Patient widened his eyes and nodded, blowing air out of his lips. “Yeah.”

"He wanted the cat to be sent to the Bahamares. I don't know what he was on about," Ember chimed in, shaking her head. Her face hardened. "But the fact that he's here… means I need to do something." When Patient turned to her, she elaborated, "I have a feeling I'll be in deep shit tomorrow."

"Ydych chi'n gwybod iddo?" Tenmei asked, turning to Ember with a brow raised.

”Did you know that guy?”

Ember looked to the sky and glared as an airship sailed across it, sporting the purples and golds that were more or less all around Canterlot. "I've a feeling… a gut feeling at that…" she trailed off.

Phobos meowed again. Patient turned to regard Koto and Tenmei. "Give the cat to Patchouli, and this can of tuna." He magically gave Tenmei the tuna can and added, "Tell her the cat's a friend." The two exchanged glances and nodded, and Koto shifted to let Phobos climb into her withers. With that, they were off, cantering down a street to deliver the cat.

Patient turned to Ember. "So… why'd you drop out of high school?" he asked.

Ember closed all three of her eyes and sighed. "A handful of ponies… drove me to do it," she replied bitterly. "And if my hunch is correct… they're likely here to bitch at Celestia like no tomorrow."