Author's Note

So this is my first ever chapter of my first ever story, please give me any pointers on where to improve on my writing and I hope you enjoy

This is what Johnny Looks like till I can get an artist to draw him all art belongs to the artists

Hell of a Wakeup

God Damn... my everything… never drinking… again

A man groaned as he covered his eyes to prevent more sunlight from hitting his face but to little avail as he was now awake.

“I thought I closed those blinds before bed”

The man then rolled over to release something was strange about his king size bed, apart from the cold air hitting his prone form, instead of feeling his comfortable bed beneath him.

He felt cold, damp, rocky grass and also a branch stabbing him in the back of the neck.

“What the fuck? Why is my bed covered in wet grass… wait this isn’t my bed” The man thought before he sat up quickly and looked around only to be dumbfounded by the fact he wasn’t in his room, wasn’t in his apartment… he was in the middle of a dense, dark forest.

“Holy Shit I am in a forest, how did I get into a forest… the closest forest to my place is 30 kilometers… oh shit, oh fuck… Johnny came your shit” He said slapping himself only to groan as he remembered about his bad hangover.

“Fuck, I am never drinking… again… ever” he growled as he climbed to his feet and stretched resulting in several pops and cracks. “Okay John, what did you did you do last night mate?” he asked himself as he ran his hand through his charcoal black hair.

“Okay so first, pre-drinks at Mark’s place… then we took the train to Doug’s place to celebrate the new year, had some more alcohol… ummm then Doug started the barbecue just as HE turned… I left and then… fuck did I black out and go walkabout?”

he asked as he looked around at his surroundings before noticing that there was in a small clearing by a river so John walked over to it and knelt down by it before he removed his aviators and placed them in his pocket before he cupped his hands and used them to scoop up some of the ice cold water and wash his face to wake him up more before he replaced his glasses.

“Best check what I got on me,” Johnny said as he felt around his pockets and pulled out his mobile phone which he checked to see it had 79 percent battery, no reception and that it was 3:30 pm.
"Majorly overslept" he grumbled as he placed the phone by him before he pulled out his wallet and checked to see if everything was in order.

“Bank card, Licence, roughly three hundred and ninety five dollars and my house key” he muttered before placing it down by his phone before he unslung his backpack and opening the first pocket it to find a change of clothes, Phone charger, Headphones, Inhaler, Painkillers, Empty water bottle, candy bars, Antihistamines, Gum and two bottles of whiskey.

After inspecting the bag's outside, he nodded and pulled out the painkillers, bottle and gum before he refilled the bottle and took some of the painkillers to help with his headache and some gum after he downed the pills before he refilled the water and placed the bottle and painkillers back in his bag and grabbed his phone and wallet. " I think all my important and fragile things are in the second pocket" he mutters to himself but didn't open to check.

“Okay, let’s check if I got any texts last night,” Johnny said as he unlocked his phone and checked but shook his head. “Nope nothing new” he sighed before placing the device and wallet back into his pocket and pulled his bag on before he rose to his feet.

“Okay let’s follow this river then” Johnny muttered as he began walking along the bank downstream while he tried his best to remember the night before only to have a surge of pain rush through his head causing him to drop to his knees and hold his head in pain from overworking his sore head.

“WHY CAN’T I REMEMBER GODDAMMIT !” He shouted at the top of his lungs.

"I wasn't even that drunk....unless...” He was saying before a loud snap was heard causing him to quickly turn towards the sound to see a large rooster.

“Now where did you come from?” Johnny asked the farm animal as it hissed at him. “Wait, what? Chooks can’t hiss” he said as it rose up on its crocodile-like tail and hiss again.

“OKAY WHAT THE HONEST FUCK!” The man shouted before the beast launched itself at him and tackled him before it glared into his eyes through its blood red eyes straight into the man’s soul only for the creature to blink in confusion as it moves it’s face closer to Johnny’s aviators only to quickly hop off him and squawk at him. Feeling bold the man got to his feet and spread his arms out wide.

“You want some Colonel ?” He growled at the bird as it suddenly bolted into the depths of the forest leaving the man confused, pissed off and slightly hungry.

“If the guys new I just got tackled by a mutant chicken, I would never hear the end of it” he groaned before checking himself over to find the bird had sliced his jacket slightly causing him to growl.

“YEAH YOU BETTER RUN, OR NEXT TIME I’LL FRY YOU UP!”

Johnny shouted before his stomach growled so he unslung his backpack and pulled out one of the candy bars and quickly consumed it and placed the empty wrapper back in his bag.

“So now what? Should I wait for rescue? No, I doubt I am anywhere local seeing as that doom Chicken is around, um make camp? No, I have fuck all supplies so I guess I should continue following the river and hopefully, I find someone… and hopefully, they speak English” He said as he continued to follow the river.

(Half an hour later)
“Ahh fuck that is the stuff” John moaned in relief as he ‘Watered’ a bush before he pulled up his pants and zipped them up making sure he didn’t get his junk, as he was busy fixing up his attire, he heard a faint noise to his left causing him to look up and listen carefully to the sound of silence, no birds, no bug just the sound of the river gently flowing. “I could have sworn…”

“AHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!"

“The fuck?” He asked himself as he took off towards the female scream, ignoring a small voice in his head telling him to run in the opposite direction.

“Fucking Christ my chivalry is gonna get me killed”

He muttered as a second scream was heard but this time sounded like one of Terror and pain causing Johnny to double his efforts and run faster before he burst through the tree line to see another river and above was a glistening white castle carved into the very mountain itself high above.
“Okay, it’s official, I am somewhere far away from home"

(Within said Castle)

Sitting upon the throne room of the castle sat a tall Alicorn mare, her coat was that of fresh snow, her eyes violet diamonds, elegant swan-like wings adorn her back fitted through the beautiful silk with a dress that gently hugged her form in a failed attempt to hid her massive bosom and wide hip.

Her mane flowed in a none existent wind gently waving the blue, green, lilac and pink that made it up, an ivory spear-like horn adorned her forehead with a magnificent golden crown resting atop her head. A golden yoke-like necklace around her neck completed the secret meaning behind the two, One to show her of noble birth and magnificent wealth, the other to represent that even though she was royalty she was also a servant to her people.

Many knew not of the symbolism of the two aside from her fellow princess....her family, Celestia Lux Solaris was at her wit's end.

Since day court had started it had been filled to the brim with greedy nobles demanding this and that. Every day it’s like this she mentally sighed Everyday they come in here and demand this or that with not even a thought about who or what it might cost.

It's days like this that I just wish for something to happenThe elegant Princess.

As if on cue a ripple of magic passed through her making her shiver.

What was that? She whispered to herself curiously

What ever it was it was enormous

"Auntie?" A whiny voice snaps her from her train of thought “Are you listening to me?"
The princess of the sun stared down at the stallion in front of her with a gentle smile “I’m sorry Blueblood but something has come up".

The stallion in question gave a look like she had just issued his execution "WHAT COULD BE MORE IMPORTANT THAN ME?" He shrieked ignoring her nephew’s outburst she turned to the guard at the base of her throne.

"Corporal Forge," The Princess asked the unicorn guard causing the guard to turn and salute her.

"Remove every pony from the throne room even the guards then inform my sister, the captain of the Wonder bolts as well as Discord to meet me here within the hour."

"What of you your highness" the guard questioned nervously

Celestia smile turn to a grim frown "I will see if I can find the location of the anomaly" All the guards saluted as the cleared the nobles from the throne room, once the room was clear, Celestia summoned a pair of scrolls and used her magic to write down to different letters before she rolled them up and sent them away, once away she looked out the window and sighed loudly “Please" she begged quietly " Can this not be a threat for once!"