The life and times of Lafayette Ryder (Sex & violence)

Pinkie, happy to see me, hops in the air and hangs there for a second. In that second she whispers something in my ear that forces me to sit back down and cross my legs. Damn Pinkie, who knew you were such a naughty filly.

***

“Sure, that sounds great. But you’re still upset about your friends aren’t you?” I nod. “Remember what I told you earlier?” I nod and her expression turns sultry. “You up for it? My room’s just upstairs.” I look to my left and right, Everypony is preoccupied with the party, no one will notice if I’m gone for a few minutes, or a half hour.

“You got any whiskey?”

“I have a whole liquor cabinet full of Applejack Daniels, is that OK?”

“That’ll work, what the hell lets go.”

Checking once more to ensure that nopony notices my retreat I smile softly and follow Pinkie’s bouncing cotton candy clump of a tail up the stairs, through a hallway and to a messily painted pink door with polka dots and sparkles. Traumatic memories of terrible vampire movies fill my mind as I crouch and walk into the room but I instinctively suppress them when I see what lies in wait for me. Spread-eagled and on her back Pinkie is resting against the foot of her bed with seductive smile on her sweet, pink lips and a full bottle of booze held tightly between her hooves.

“Wanna play with me?” She coos and winks at me and passes over the bottle.

“I’d love too,” I whisper enthusiastically as I kneel down in front of Pinkie, “But I want to be on bottom!” I bring the dark bottle of smooth whisky to my lips and gulp the intoxicating contents away, but before I can empty it Pinkie whisks it out of my hands and finishes it for herself. I laugh heartily and stretch myself out of a brightly colored mat on the floor that, like everything else in this room, is covered in polka dots and glance up at Pinkie. “My body is ready!” I joke.

Pinkie giggles merrily and moves away from the bed; before I know it she’s straddling my lower back, wriggling her plump hips to and fro, and pawing at the sides of my chest. Smiling like an idiot I twist my torso around to face hers and wrap one long arm over and across her slender neck. She arches back violently and snickers like a giddy schoolgirl when I moan beneath her. I adjust and readjust my legs until we’re no longer on top of one another but rather lying sideways atop each other. She gasps shallowly as her hoof grazes my groin and grimace but she doesn’t slow a bit. In no time at all her rump is resting on my chin and her muzzle at my belt. I snort as I laugh and then begin to contort my body until my arms are around her waist and my face is merely an inch from hers. She smiles, embarrassed, as she grinds her hips against mine in an attempt to turn her entire body a hundred and eighty degrees while still keeping a hoof close to my sweaty chest. By now we’re both close to finishing and I can’t keep it up much longer, but to my surprise neither can she. Pinkie grunts and groans as I reposition myself one last time, I wrap one arm around her waist, a leg around her neck, and push mightily to keep up. She gasps in surprise and while trying to reach a back hoof up and over my head collapses into a giggling, giddy pile of pink in my lap. I shout out in victory and relax a bit, slowly untangling my long limbs from my new partner’s comparatively small figure. Pinkie, exhausted and delighted, burrows her head into my heaving chest and sighs.

“That was sooooooooo much fun.” Her voice barely audible over our combined gasps for breath.

“Yeah,” I agree, “we should invite Twi and Dash to join us next time.”

“And Rarity and Applejack,” Pinkie exclaims in a sudden burst of bliss-fueled energy, “and maybe Fluttershy or Big Mac! Or,or,or,orrrrr we could get Princess Celestia to play with us!”

“Naw,” I shake my head, “I don’t picture the ruler of an entire nation as being the kind of pony who likes playing Twister for fun.”

“True,” Pinkie nods, “But maybe we could get her to play Monopony, or Hungry, Hungry Hydras, or how about Dungeons and Dragons!”

“D and D…” I deadpan, “you guys seriously have that here?”

“MmmHmm!” Pinkie assures me.

“Well now I know what I want for my birthday!” I laugh.

Together Pinkie and I get up and head back downstairs.

***

Twenty five minutes after leaving with Pinkie we sneak back downstairs. I look around, perfect, no one noticed our absence. I’m still a bit tipsy from the booze but I’m not drunk enough for it to be obvious. I give my party loving friend a kind nod and return to my other friends to enjoy the rest of the celebration