Chapters “AUTHENTIC READY TO PLAY SETO KAIBA ANIME DECK! PERFECT FOR COLLECTORS AND PLAYERS ALIKE! VERY LIMITED STOCK!”
Isn’t amazing how your perception of things can drastically change depending on your circumstances? As I stood right now, surrounded by an army of cat porcelain figurines and with the smell of mothballs and lavender viciously assaulting my nostrils, that ad was the second stupidest thing in the world. The first stupidest thing? Me, for coming here, of course.
As I contemplated the possibility of escaping through the nearby window, the little old lady came back into the living room, tightly holding a small pile of sealed cards in her right hand and with a joyful smile across her face. “Here you are, sonny.” She announced with great fanfare. “An authentic, ready to play, Seto Kaiba anime deck!”
The little old lady handed me the pile of cards, which I proceeded to examine closely. The top and bottom cards were placed with the back facing outwards, making it impossible to tell the contents of the pile without ripping the seal open, but beyond that they seemed to be in perfect condition. I smiled and asked tentatively. “Can I check them?”
She replied cheerfully. “Nope!”
I suspect my smile must have vanished faster than a fart on a storm, because she was quick to add. “There’s three copies of that dragon with blue eyes, one of the obelisk thingy and some more stuff.” I nodded very slowly. My mind was already working on a way to politely tell this little old lady that, as dumb as I was for replying to her ad and coming here, I wasn’t born yesterday, when she said. “It took me a month to build this one.”
No. Don’t you dare, little old lady. It’s bad enough you look just like my grandmother, God bless her soul, but don’t you dare try that with me. Alas, regardless of my attempts to Jedi Mind Trick her, the little old lady gave me the good old puppy dog eyes and said softly. “I’m afraid my pension is not enough these days.”
Wham. It’s a one hit knock out. I pulled out a hundred bill from my pocket, which she swiftly snatched from my hand and put inside her small, gaudy purse. “Thank you, sonny,” she said sweetly and extended her right hand towards me. Somehow, I found myself smiling genuinely as I accepted her handshake. At best, I got myself a nice deck of cards. At worst, I helped a little old lady add more cat porcelain figurines to her collection, I guess. Either way, that was my last thought before the whole world suddenly went blank.
I woke up with a jolt. My chest heaved as my eyes anxiously scanned the thinly lit room around me. I did a quick pat to make sure everything was in place. Wallet? Check. Pants? Check. Organs? Check. Alright. I stood up slowly and kept a crouching position while examining my surroundings. The room was espacious, but lacked any kind of windows; the only source of light being a single bulb on the ceiling. A basement perhaps? There were four wooden shelves on the walls to my sides, filled to the brim with all kinds of books, a blackboard covered with equations I simply could not decipher and a table with two chairs. Last but not least, there was a pair of pantyhose covered, slender, shapely legs in front of me.
My mind was filled with questions. Where was I? Did I get kidnapped? Did the little old lady really had such damn fine legs? Wait a minute. That wasn’t the little old lady from before, that was a schoolgirl. A schoolgirl? Yeah, at least that’s what I thought when I saw her attire. Brown shoes, a purple mini-skirt and a white shirt covered by a darker jacket all buttoned up. She seemed to be in her early twenties and was very pretty, with her pale skin and long, straight dark hair with a single purple stripe. The pretty girl looked at me studiously with her light brown eyes behind a pair of black rimmed glasses.
I suppose this is the part where I break the silence with a witty line or a ferocious declaration, but all that came out of my mouth was a short “uhh”. The pretty girl produced a pen light which she turned on and held in front of me, moving it left and right, up and down; my eyes followed her movements almost subconsciously. She turned the light off and let out a sigh of relief. The pretty girl adjusted her glasses and cleared her throat. It reminded me of a nerdy student about to begin her presentation. “Please don’t be afraid,” she said calmly. “You are in Equestria now. My name is Twilight Sparkle and I summoned you here.”
Have you ever seen one of those comedy movies with the record needle scratch sound effect? Yeah, it felt exactly like that. Twilight Sparkle? The pony? Seriously? Did I get kidnapped by a cosplayer? Admittedly, it didn’t bother me that much, with her being so attractive and with those amazing legs, but a bit of forewarning would have been nice. I mean, you just can’t kidnap a guy when he’s in the middle of a transaction with a little old lady and expect him to roleplay with you just like that. I stated flatly. “You’re a human.”
Twilight shook her head. “I am an Equestrian.” She crossed her arms over her chest. “Our species are very similar, but there are still differences, starting with the innate ability to use magic.” She waved her hand dimissively. “But that’s not important right now.” Her demeanor suddenly turned very serious. “Tell me, do you know how to play Duel Monsters?”
I quirked my eyebrow in a way that would’ve made Dwayne Johnson proud. Duel Monsters? As in “Yu-Gi-Oh!”? Okay, stop. Stop it. This was getting way too silly for my tastes. I stood up fully, dusted myself and looked at Twilight intently. She was only slightly shorter than me. I asked sternly. “Can you please explain to me what’s going on first?”
Twilight stood firm. “Answer my question, please.”
I let out a breath of frustration and massaged the bridge of my nose. “Look, I don’t see what does knowing how to play a card game have to do with anything.”
A voice suddenly caught my attention. “Well, for one, you’re not going to need these if you don’t know how to play.” A young boy approached Twilight shuffling through a pile of cards. My cards. He wore white sneakers, blue jeans and a green shirt with a purple jogging hoodie over it. His hair was short and messy, of a pale green color, the same as his eyes.
Twilight swiftly chastised him. “Spike! You shouldn’t go around taking other people’s stuff!”
Spike? The baby dragon? This was some seriously dedicated cosplaying. Once again I found myself commenting flatly. “You’re a kid.”
Spike’s expression turned sour. He raised his index finger. “Number one, I’m ten years old.” Then the middle one. “And number two, I am a Dragonute.” He put extra emphasis on that last word. It was then I realized his pupils were slit, like that of a reptile. Those must have been some expensive contact lenses. Spike noticed my surprise and gave me a roguish grin that displayed a pair of especially developed fangs and made me take a step back. Right. I wish I had this much money to invest on my hobbies.
Twilight quickly cut him off. “That’s enough, Spike. Just give him his cards back.”
Spike protested. “But Twilight, he’s got a lot of rare cards here! Including three Blue-Eyes White Dragons!” Really? Cool. Guess the little old lady did not scam me after all.
Twilight snatched the cards and examined them. “I can’t believe it,” she muttered in awe. “I thought only Princess Celestia was in possession of these…”
An interesting bit of trivia, sure, but not important right now. I raised my right hand and called drily. “Excuse me, but I’m still here, you know.”
Twilight apologized sheepishly and, with a wave of her hand, levitated the pile of cards back to my hands. My jaw dropped. “That was magic.” I muttered. Holy shit. This was not a joke, this was the real deal. Not caring too much about my reaction, Twilight nodded and said. “Let’s start again from the beginning, shall we?” She put her hand over her chest and declared. “I am Twilight Sparkle, personal student of her highness, Princess Celestia, and this is my faithful assistant, Spike.” He puffed his chest outwards with pride. Twilight continued. “I was the one who summoned you here from the Earth with my magic…” She paused, her expression softened considerably. “Because we are desperate.”
I nodded slowly. The whole “desperate” thing did not exactly do wonders for my ego, but I imagined she had her reasons, so I kept my mouth shut and let her continue. “You see, one thousand years ago, a cruel tyrant known as King Sombra took over the Crystal Empire in the north of Equestria.” I nodded again. “The Crystal Empire” part one, got it. “He was defeated and vanished by the combined efforts of the Royal Sisters, Princess Celestia and Princess Luna…” Yeah, I remember that awesome combined magical attack. “But, as a final curse, he made the empire disappear along with him.” Okay, we’re following the plotline of the show so far. “Now, he has returned and is using his magic to force every single one of his subjects to fight for him.”
I blinked twice. “The Cutie Re-Mark” part one? I tilted my head slightly, Twilight’s clothes seemed too fit to hide a pair of wings, plus she hasn’t referred to herself as a Princess. Does this mean she didn’t become one? I went ahead and asked. “What does this have to do with Duel Monsters?”
Twilight’s expression turned grim. “With Princess Celestia and Princess Luna on the front lines, we quickly took the advantage, but something happened…” I listened attentively. “King Sombra started summoning monsters, powerful creatures that quickly turned the tide of the battle in his favor.” Twilight put her hand inside the pocket of her jacket and pulled out a pile of cards. “It didn’t take us long to realize they were the very same monsters depicted in these cards.” She flipped the one on top of the pile, revealing the Black Magician . “Duel Monsters, a game created using the notes of the ancient wizard, Starswirl the Bearded, as a basis; we tried to fight Sombra on equal terms with it…” Twilight confessed ruefully. “But the results have been less than satisfactory.”
There was a moment of silence were the gears in my head worked at full capacity to process the information. I finally dared to ask. “Is that why you brought me here?”
Twilight nodded. “I traced the origin of the game to the Earth and, seeing how it’s a much more technologically advanced world than Equestria, I was hoping to bring somebody who could help us in this battle or at least obtain some powerful cards.”
That made sense, except for one thing. “Why me? I mean, there are hundreds of professional players back on the Earth…”
Twilight bit her lower lip. “Well, you see…”
Spike quickly interjected. “Think about it like this.” He took a bunch of gems from inside a small vase on the nearby shelf and held them in front of me. “These gems are humans and my pocket is the Earth.” He put the gems inside the pocket of his hoodie. “The pocket is too small, which means I can only take them out one by one. Now, I know there’s a one hundred percent chance I will get a gem, but I won’t know which kind until I pull it out.” Spike picked an emerald and threw it inside his mouth with a flick of his thumb, chewing it contently with minimal effort before swallowing. “Get it?”
I nodded. “So, in short, it was pure luck?”
Twilight admitted embarrasedly. “Yes.”
I took a deep breath and tried to cool myself. That happened. “Okay, so, what are my options now?”
Twilight and Spike shared a glance. Then, she looked at me solemnly. “If you want, I can send you back to the Earth. In that case, you will have to leave your cards with us.” I could tell from her tone that was not a request. She continued with some hesitation. “Or, if you feel confident in your skills, you can help us fight…”
I put my clenched right hand over my mouth and glared at the floor. Alright, let’s try to analyze this situation in the most logical way possible. Presently I am located on an alternate version of Equestria where ponies are humans, sort of, and I am being asked by Twilight Sparkle herself to fight on a war using a card game as a weapon. Yep. Assuming I am not currently allucinating from inhaling the mixture of mothballs and lavender inside the little old lady’s house and this is all real, I don’t have any particular reason to take part in this conflict. Hell, even if I decided to go home, they would keep my cards, which would surely help them greatly. So, whatever option I pick, I would end up aiding them, right? Right?
I glanced at Twilight, who kept her eyes locked on me. She didn’t look angry, scared or even anxious. No, she had this aura of strenght and dignity, as if she was ready to keep going forward no matter what fate threw at her. Oh my God. This is what those heroes of legend felt when they embarked on a perilous quest for the sake of a woman, isn’t?
I lowered my arms, took a breath and said with all the confidence an office drone like me could possibly muster when faced with such a daunting task. “I’ll help you.” And for he first time since I arrived here, Twilight smiled. A pure and sincere smile that made her features glow and my heart skip a beat. She said softly. “Thank you.”
Spike grinned and gave me a thumbs up.
Feeling positively awesome, I clasped my hands together and asked enthusiastically. “What now?”
Twilight adjusted her glasses with a grin. “First of all, we will conduct a test duel.”
I frowned slightly. “Test duel?”
Twilight nodded. “As thankful as we are, we need to make sure you are properly familiarized with the way Duel Monsters is played here.”
“Oh right.” I chuckled sheepishly.
Twilight snapped her fingers and levitated a white Duel Disk from one of the nearby shelves towards my hands. I examined the device with fascination; it looked exactly like the mass production model from the Battle City arc. “That’s a Duel Disk.” She explained. “It absorbs the excess magical energy from its surroundings and focuses it to create solid holographic projections with a maximum level of interactivity.” Amazing. I tried to imagine what could become of the game if we had something like this back on the Earth. Twilight continued her lecture by pointing out the slots for the deck, extra deck and graveyard, as well as the monster, spell and trap zones; and how to play each card.
I imagine I must have looked like an eight years-old opening his birthday presents when I smiled and said. “Wow.” At least judging from the way Twilight giggled at my reaction. She asked with amusement. “Don’t you have these on your world?” Sure we did. They are made of cheap plastic, awkward to play with and make you look like a gigantic dork. I shook my head and replied. “Nope, we don’t.” Twilight tilted her head with a mixture of curiosity and disappointment. She went ahead and announced. “Spike will be your opponent.” He already had his Duel Disk adjusted around his right arm.
Spike smirked to me and said. “Don’t worry, I promise I won’t beat you too badly.” Almost as if his spirit was contagious, I found myself smirking too as I adjusted the Duel Disk around my left arm, it was surprisingly light and comfortable. I taunted back. “Show me what you got, Spike.”
Twilight declared we would duel outside and Spike took up the stairs with enviable speed. I followed her from behind, my eyes inevitably locking on her legs and going up until reaching her nicely shaped ass. They way her skirt swayed to the sides with every step she took, giving me occasional glimpses of her ass-cheeks, was practically hypnotic. I shook my head and mentally chastised myself.
We emerged into the main room of the Golden Oak Library. I stood in awe at the beautifully carved room; the shelves filled with books and scrolls, the ornate decorations on the walls, the stairs leading upwards; truly it was something out of an epic fantasy adventure. However, my amazement was soon replaced by confusion when Twilight opened the door and I saw we were surrounded by a deep, dark forest. The Everfree Forest. I looked around in shock. “I-Is this were you live?”
Spike put on his hood on and looked away while Twilight nodded slowly. “Our hometown, Ponyville, was taken by Sombra’s forces.” She informed grimly. “I managed to teleport our whole home inside this forest, the Everfree Forest, at the last minute. Fortunately for us, the enemy forces won’t venture this deep.”
I put my right hand over my forehead. It was crazy enough that every character seemed to be a human, or something similar, but now Ponyville was already taken? What happened to the remaining Mane Six then? Was King Sombra this powerful on the show? Did Duel Monsters truly give him that much of an edge? And what else could have possibly changed?
Twilight’s words broke me from my trance. “I’m sorry; I didn’t ask your name.” I pondered for a second, smiled and said. “Call me Joe.” She nodded. “Are you ready to begin?”
I nodded silently and inserted my deck into the Duel Disk; the device activated and unfolded itself in spectacular fashion. My deck was even shuffled automatically, a feature I was thankful for since I suck at card shuffling. A holographic display appeared above us, showing our life points as 4000. I frowned. Not 8000? This changes everything.
Both, Spike and I, drew our initial hands of five cards. He motioned with his head and said. “Go ahead, take the first turn.” I nodded and drew my first card. It suddenly dawned on me I hadn’t checked the contents of the deck yet. Hopefully all the times I’ve watched Seto Kaiba play will pay off. I placed a card on the disk and announced the summon of my first monster. “Cyclops !” The one-eyed, dark-skinned giant materialized on my side of the field. The sound of its breathing, the heat and smell emanating from its body; it truly felt like the monster was real. I gulped hard. Even with its lackluster stats, the Cyclops was thrice the size of a phone booth and had ripping muscles that made me feel it could tear off my arms like they were made of plastiline. I muttered to myself. “No wonder Sombra could back them into a corner.” I set a card and finished my turn.
With a wide grin, Spike drew the first card of his deck dynamically. “I summon Masked Dragon!” The serpentine dragon appeared with a loud hiss. He pointed with his index finger and declared the attack of his monster. “Heat Glare!” The Masked Dragon’s eyes glowed and my Cyclops immediately burst into flames, taking my life points down to 3800. I instinctively shielded my face, the heat of the flames feeling very real. Spike chuckled in satisfaction and declared. “Turn end!”
I could feel my heart beating furiously on my chest. My blood boiled and my hands trembled yet my lips twisted into a big smile. This was exciting! There was no other way to describe it! All that pointing, posing and yelling; it all made sense now! I drew a card and immediately activated my set Resurrection of the Dead to bring Cyclops back. The one-eyed giant clawed its way from the ground into the surface. I declared fiercely. “I sacrifice my Cyclops! Come, Sword Stalker of Revenge !” A demonic looking warrior appeared, his thorn and tattered wings billowing behind him like a cape as he swinged his sword menacingly. I continued by playing an equip spell. “Giganticize !” The Sword Stalker roared as his muscles burst and his attack points went from 2000 to 4000.
Spike did not seem bothered at all. No surprise there. I may be a casual player, but I know how Masked Dragon works. I declared the attack of my Sword Stalker of Revenge, his blade slicing through the dragon like a hot knife through butter. Sure enough, Spike summoned a dragon from his deck, calling its name with enthusiasm. “Black Dragon's Hatchling !” I blinked in surprise. This could only mean one thing. As Spike’s life points went down from 4000 to 1400, the Sword Stalker’s muscles shriveled and his attack points became 1000. I set a card and finished my turn.
Spike shouted. “Draw!” He picked a card from his hand and held it above his head, announcing his move dramatically. “I sacrifice my Black Dragon’s Hatchling!” Here it comes. The Black Dragon’s Hatchling burst into flames, transforming into its adult form. A jet-black dragon with scales sharpened like swords and eyes that shone like the finest rubies. “Come, Red-Eyes Black Dragon!” Sweat dripped from my forehead as I felt the heat emanating from its mouth and the smell of sulfur that made my nose itch. The dragon roared fiercely, making me flinch. Spike smiled with pride and asked. “How do you like it?” If my memory served me well, the Blue-Eyes White Dragon represented “power” while the Red-Eyes Black Dragon represented “potential”. I smiled back and said. “Very fitting for you, Spike.”
Spike nodded towards my weakened Sword Stalker. “Don’t you think you rushed a bit by playing Giganticize?” He smiled mischievously. “Or do you have a trap prepared?” Without waiting for an answer, Spike summoned Mirage Dragon. The serpent-like golden dragon appeared next to him from a cloud of mist. Spike pointed at it with his thumb. “As long as this guy is here, you won’t be able to activate traps in battle.”
I smiled. “I know.” My Sword Stalker let out a pitiful moan, his body withering and dissolving into a cloud of black dust as I activated my trap card. “Deck Destruction Virus of Death !” One of Seto Kaiba’s signature cards. By sacrificing a dark monster with 1000 or less attack points, I can destroy all of my opponent’s monsters with 1500 or more attack on their field, hand and every single one they draw during the following three turns. The black cloud enveloped the two dragons and they fell dead like flies. Spike flinched and wordlessly dumped his entire hand into his graveyard. I tilted my head in surprise. That certainly went better than expected.
“Draw.” I did not waste any time in summoning Gargoyle Powered and ordering a direct attack. The crimson demon slashed Spike across the chest, making him fall on his ass and taking his life points down to zero. I did not even have to bring the Blue-Eyes White Dragon, in the end. As the monster vanished, I fell on my knees, exhausted. Spike hopped back on his feet, pulled back his hood and approached me with a sullen look on his face. He put both hands inside his pockets and said. “That was luck, you know.” I laughed meekly and said. “That’s part of the game too, you know.”
Twilight approached and complimented us for our performance. I smiled and asked tentatively if that meant I was “qualified”. She adjusted her glasses, smiled and said. “I’ll give you a passing grade.” I laughed. Harsh. I stood up, dusted myself and said. “What now?”
Twilight’s expression turned somber. “Now we head for Ponyville.”
Once again, I found myself completely captivated by Twilight. And no, it wasn’t just because of her luscious legs. Or her amazing ass. Or her breathtaking beauty. No, no; it was the way she moved. It reminded me of an accomplished conductor leading an orchestra. The way she made the books and scrolls float around her, opening and closing, arranging themselves back and forth between shelves in different combinations at the behest of the sharp, precise waving and pointing of her delicate hands; until only a select few were left, neatly piled on a small, circular table. Spike had disappeared just a moment ago into one of the adjacent rooms; between that and Twilight’s focus on her task, I decided the best thing I could do was remain silent. Not that it bothered me; like I said before, I was completely enthralled by her display of magical prowess.
It wasn’t until Spike returned a couple of minutes later, carrying a metal tray with three thick sandwiches and three glasses filled with water, that I broke off from my trance. Without even taking her eyes away from a small scroll, Twilight got hold of a sandwich and a glass of water with her magic, while I accepted mine from Spike with a smile and a soft thank you. I glanced at the contents of the sandwich discreetly. There was a lot of green there. The bread crunched as I took a bite and munched slowly. Much to my surprise, it tasted surprisingly good. I swallowed and said. “This is great, Spike. What does it have?” He cleared his throat, raised an index finger and recited. “Sun-dried tomatoes, arugula, shredded cheese and black olives, between two slices of lightly toasted whole wheat bread.” I nodded. Thank God. For a moment I was afraid I was going to end up with my mouth filled with hay, grass or flowers. Spike turned his nose up and declared. “Not to boast, but it’s one of my finest recipes.”
It suddenly occurred me to ask. “Do you eat meat?” He shrugged and replied that gems, fruits and vegetables were enough for him. “That and Equestrians don’t eat meat.” Interesting. First the magic and now this. I wonder what else do “Equestrians” have in common with the ponies from the show. My thoughts were cut off when Twilight suddenly declared. “Done.” She commanded swiftly. “Spike, go get our supplies, please.” He nodded, finished his meal in three bites and gulped down the glass of water, almost choking in the process, before taking to the stairs upwards.
I glanced at Twilight, daintily wiping her mouth with a napkin, while trying to pick up the pace with my own food. I both, wanted and needed, to know more about this world and its inhabitants, but her demeanor made things difficult. She was far more reserved than I expected and did not ask anything beyond the most important questions. Not that I blamed her, considering her circumstances, but it made me I feel hesitant to ask. What if I blurt something I am not supposed to know, like a name or a place, and she ends up thinking I’m a spy or something worse? I had to tread carefully. I took a drink of water after finishing my sandwich and asked casually. “Say, do you think it’s a good idea, Twilight? To take on a whole town with just three people?”
Twilight adjusted her glasses. “Don’t worry, I have a plan.” You don’t say? Fortunately for me, she continued unprompted. “Ponyville is a rural town and one of the major providers of food and rations for our forces.” She explained further. “Mostly apple derived products from Sweet Apple Acres.” The Apple family farm is still there, good to know. “I have been keeping an eye on the town’s levels of activity and nothing has changed beyond the fact all the food now goes for King Sombra.” She gritted her teeth. “No reinforcements or added magical defenses; just the townspeople forced to work for him against their will.” Twilight finished by stating. “There’s only one person there we need to worry about.” I nodded. So, King Sombra left somebody in charge? I attempted to steer the conversation towards the rest of the Mane Six. “Still, shouldn’t we try to gather a few more allies? Isn’t there another place where we could go ask for help?”
Twilight shook her head. “The capital city of Canterlot is close enough, but I doubt they would be able to spare soldiers between fighting on the front and trying to keep the city safe.” Alright. Time for the last question. “Any friends we could contact?” She removed her glasses and massaged her eyes. “My friends and I got separated in our efforts to contribute towards the fight.” She admitted sadly. “I haven’t seen them in a while.” I gulped. That’s enough for today. Damn it. How do the guys at the movies and novels do it? How do they know what to say to make their friends and allies feel better in moments like these?
Twilight extended her right hand and materialized a dark purple coat she put on. I smiled in amusement. She was one wand away from looking like a Hogwarts student. Twilight looked at me up and down and said. “I think you should wear one of these too.” Without waiting for an answer, she snapped her fingers and a blue coat of a similar design to hers appeared on my hands. I blinked in surprise and said. “Thanks.” The coat fit like a glove. Not only that, but it went perfectly with my black shoes, blue trousers and darker button shirt. Who would have thought being an office drone would have the benefit of making me look like the Duelist Kingdom version of Seto Kaiba with just a single extra piece of clothing? Now all I need is the looks, education, money, resources, etc. Baby steps, I guess.
Spike came down the stairs with a backpack easily twice his size. He didn’t seem bothered by the weight, curiously enough. Between his speed and this, it made me wonder if he was naturally stronger thanks to his race. I looked at Twilight and asked. “Do you have a map of the forest?” She finished adjusting a Duel Disk around her left arm, smiled and said. “Even better.” Twilight whistled softly and a small, brown owl came flying into the room through the open window, posing itself on her shoulder. My eyes widened as I recognized the bird. Twilight smiled and pointed at him. “Joe, this is Owlowiscious.” Then at me. “Owlowiscious, this is Joe.” Owlowiscious greeted me with a short hoot.
Without thinking, I leaned forward to better look at Owlowiscious, opened my mouth and, with my voice raised an octave, said. “He’s so cute.” Twilight stifled a laugh. Spike was far less restrained about it. What? Can’t a man have a weakness for cute things?
The canopy of trees formed a perfect dome above, allowing only half of the rays of the sun to touch the dirt trail, where we steadily made our way. Owlowiscious lead us, occasionally flying way ahead then coming back several seconds later to inform us the path was safe by means of a cheerful hoot.
I walked with Twilight at my side and Spike behind us. Despite the chorus of chirps and rustling of leaves coming from seemingly everywhere around us, I could not help but feel disappointed. Don’t get me wrong, I wasn’t hoping for a Manticore or a pack of Timberwolves to attack us so I could fend them off by throwing my trading cards at them, but after a while of walking around the Everfree Forest seeing nothing beyond trees and rocks, well, it gets kind of boring. I turned to Twilight and attempted to make some conversation. “Say, Twilight.” She turned to me. “You mentioned a couple of names back then.” I made a gesture with my hand, as if I was having some difficulty remembering them. “Starswirl and the Princesses?”
Twilight’s face lit up. “Starswirl the Bearded is the most important conjurer of the pre-classical era.” She kept going like an excited child talking about her favorite subject. “Not only he created more tan two hundred spells, but he also had the ability to travel through different worlds and all the information he documented from his visits has been employed to greatly advance research on nearly every single conceivable field, from agriculture and engineering to medicine and thaumaturgy.”
For some reason I pictured an old man with a long, white beard smiling mischievously and introducing himself as Starswirl the Bearded, before saying something along the lines of “Oh, but I believe on Earth you knew me as Philippus Aureolus Theophrastus Bombastus von Hohenheim !” followed by a joyful laugh. Twilight quickly added. “He also has a shelf in the Canterlot library of magic named after him!” I smiled and said. “You seem to know a lot about him.” She grinned cutely and said. “I’m a big admirer of his work.” From behind us, Spike muttered. “Understatement of the century.” Twilight shot him a glare. I tried to keep the conversation going. “And what about the Princesses?”
Twilight pondered for a moment, then began narrating. “Once upon a time, in the magical land of Equestria, there were two regal sisters who ruled together and created harmony for all the land.” Wait a minute. “To do this, the eldest, Princess Celestia, used her powers to raise the sun at dawn; the younger, Princess Luna, brought out the moon to begin the night.” Is she really telling me the story of “The Mare in the Moon”? “Thus, the two sisters maintained balance for their kingdom and their subjects.” Awesome. I smiled with delight. “But as time went on, the younger sister became resentful. Equestrians relished and played in the day her elder sister brought forth, but shunned and slept through her beautiful night. One fateful day, the younger sister refused to lower the moon to make way for the dawn. The elder sister tried to reason with her, but the bitterness in the young one's heart had transformed her into a wicked being of darkness: Nightmare Moon.”
Okay. Not really different from what I already know. “She vowed that she would shroud the land in eternal night, subject Equestrians to a perpetual slumber and torment them with endless nightmares.” I gulped. That took a turn for the dark. “Reluctantly, the elder sister raised her hand towards the younger and the two clashed in a battle that shook both, land and sky.” I nodded dumbfounded. “In the end, the elder sister defeated the younger, and banished her permanently in the moon. The elder sister took on responsibility for both, sun and moon, and harmony has been maintained in Equestria for generations since.”
Twilight looked at me expectantly. It was a good start, but I still had to play dumb. “So, Princess Celestia and Princess Luna are the rulers of Equestria, who keep the peace and harmony by, among other things, controlling the cycle of the sun and the moon respectively?” She nodded in approval. “Very good.” I felt like a little kid getting a listening comprehension test. “But you mentioned Princess Luna was fighting King Sombra’s forces. What happened to Nightmare Moon then?” Twilight smiled nostalgically. “It was predicted Nightmare Moon would return on the longest day of the thousandth year since her defeat, which was also the thousandth year of the Summer Sun Celebration.” Here we go again. “Princess Celestia had entrusted me with overseeing the preparations for the celebration on Ponyville, as well as making some friends.” She chuckled at the last part. “Just as I expected, Nightmare Moon returned that very night, announcing herself to the whole town before retreating towards the Castle of the Two Sisters, her and Celestia’s old home located here, on the Everfree Forest.” Right. Everything looks like it’s going to play exactly like in the show, then the sudden twist hits me like a slap on the back of the head. “My friends and I gave chase, fought Nightmare Moon and managed to defeat her, purifying the darkness and reverting her back into Princess Luna.” Told you. I raised a hand. “You fought her?” Twilight nodded. “I mean, you really fought her?” I made a few punching motions. She smiled in embarrasement. “Well, I fought using my magic, but yes.”
Wow. Seriously. They beat the darkness out of her. Literally. I suddenly felt very thankful for the fact they had turned to settle this conflict by playing a card game. Still, something seemed amiss here. The Elements of Harmony. Twilight did not mention them at all. Does this mean Celestia and Luna did not find them? Did they defeat Discord without them? Or they simply do not exist and neither does the Spirit of Chaos and Disharmony? Moreover, if my memory served me well, Nightmare Moon headed towards the Castle of the Two Sisters because that’s where she was hoping to find and destroy them. But if the elements do not exist here, or haven’t been awakened, then why did she go there? Was she looking for something else? My musings were interrupted when Twilight tripped on a small root and fell right on her ass. “Ouch.” I extended my hand and helped her stand up, while discreetly taking a peek between her legs. Guess some habits from high school aren’t as dead as I believed them to be.
The rays of the sun intensified as we reached the edge of the forest, welcoming our presence like a shining red carpet. Spike had taken the lead, with Owlowiscious comfortably perched atop his backpack.
Twilight must have noticed my silence and the distant look in my eyes, because she called my name. I replied with a soft, questioning “hmm” before turning to look at her with a smile. She paused for a second and said. “I wanted to apologize.” I tilted my head in confusion. “I was the one who brought you here yet I have been practically ignoring you all this time.” I smiled nonchalantly and said. “That’s okay; I don’t think I would be interested in socializing either if I were in your shoes.” Twilight nodded. “Thank you, Joe.” She put her hand over her chest. “Trust me when I say I would love to hear more about you and your world once we put an end to this war.” I chuckled embarrassed. I’m afraid she would get bored with me pretty fast.
Twilight smiled and asked. “Do you have a family? Friends?” I nodded. “Mother, father and a younger brother; several cousins, aunts and uncles, childhood friends; pretty much the whole package.” She nodded slowly and asked. “Do you live with them?” I replied. “I live alone. My parents are on a trip with my brother, my friends are busy with their jobs and I’m on three weeks of vacation starting from today.” Just in case, I added. “So, I don’t think anybody will be notice my absence for a while.”
Spike suddenly announced. “We’re here!” As Twilight and I hurried up towards the exit of the Everfree Forest, I let out a small, ashamed sigh. The truth is, before she called my name, I wasn’t exactly pondering about the mysteries of this world, the nature of magic or even new strategies to defeat future foes. Nope. Remember that small peek I took? Yeah, well, turns out Twilight is not wearing panties. And her pantyhose are not exactly the kind that does much to conceal her naughty bits. Oh, and she has her pubic hair neatly trimmed in the shape of a small triangle. Yep. Let’s see you try to keep that out of your mind.
Ponyville was visible in the distance. Spike took out a small, portable telescope from his backpack and handed it to me. I placed it over my right eye and observed. Funny. The whole town looked nowhere near as bad as “The Cutie Re-Mark” part one showed; somewhat desolate, yes, but no houses on deplorable conditions or Sweet Apple Acres turned into a factory. Hmm. Twilight did say they had the advantage until Sombra started bringing monsters to life. That would certainly explain it. Just then, I spotted a tall, robust man steadily pulling a wagon. His whole head was fully covered by a brutal looking, jet-black helmet with two visors in the shape of thin, glowing lines; giving it the appearance of a pair of eyes narrowing menacingly. There were more men, women and children; every single one of them wearing the same helmet. They moved from one side to another, carrying boxes, barrels and bags filled with apples, other fruits and vegetables. Seeing them reminded me of a colony of ants. No, they were more like automatons. I gulped and handed Spike the portable telescope back.
Twilight informed. “Those helmets are dark magic artifacts King Sombra uses to control the minds of others.” I nodded grimly. On the show, those things may have looked cool or even silly, but here they were downright terrifying. I went ahead and asked her. “What’s the plan?” She stood in silence, with her eyes locked on Ponyville for a long time, enough to make me think she did not hear me. Just before I opened my mouth, she turned to me and said. “They know about Spike and me, but not you. We’ll distract them, and then you can go in.” That’s it? It sounds a bit too simple. I nodded and watched puzzled how Twilight detached her Duel Disk from her arm and put it inside the backpack. Spike did the same and the two of them marched towards the town. Owlowiscious hopped and perched himself on my right shoulder. Things only got more confusing for me when I saw they made no attempts to hide or be stealthy. They just walked right into Ponyville, stood on the middle of the street and raised their hands.
One of the “drones” saw them and immediately dropped the box she was holding. Several others followed. The way they moved in unison sent a chill down my spine. Soon, Twilight and Spike were completely surrounded. My heart was beating furiously inside my chest. It felt like they were about to jump and start tearing them apart like a pack of wild dogs on a couple of deer. But, contrary to my expectations, the drones merely escorted Twilight and Spike deeper into Ponyville, while forming a tight circle around the two of them.
Was this my cue to act? Owlowiscious hooted and took flight. I ran straight into Ponyville and followed the crowd from a safe distance while hiding between the houses. More and more drones appeared until it seemed the entire population of Ponyville was marching on a parade. It was then I noticed the smaller details: the flowers and plants withering and dying, the abandoned carts and the dust and dirt that covered the windows. Not only that, but several of the drones looked like they should have changed their clothes a couple of days ago. Where were they taking them? My answer came in the form of countless apple trees. Sweet Apple Acres, huh? The whole place seemed like it had received far more attention than the rest of the town. The crowd stood around the main entrance of the farm house, completely blocking any possible way of escape Twilight and Spike could’ve had. I ducked behind a pile of bales of hay and watched attentively.
A young girl came out of the farmhouse, flanked by an elderly woman and a child, both wearing the black helmet. She wore brown boots, blue jeans and a short sleeved, white shirt; a high-crowned, wide-brimmed brown hat covered her head. Her long, blonde hair, tied into a ponytail, fell down her back like a golden cascade. She had nothing to envy Twilight in the beauty department. Her skin was pleasantly tanned, obviously from working on the farm, while her tight jeans and shirt emphasized her toned thighs and ample breasts, giving her quite the hourglass figure. She looked at both, Twilight and Spike, grinned and said with a noticeable accent. “How mighty kind of you to finally pay us a visit, Twilight.”
I couldn’t believe my eyes. Applejack? There was no doubt about it. But what was with her expression? Her grin was feral and her emerald green eyes were filled with animosity. I kept watching as Twilight confronted her. “That’s enough, Applejack! This is not like you!” Applejack crossed both arms over her chest and asked mockingly. “Oh, really?” Twilight insisted. “The Applejack I know is a friendly and honest person who would never think of turning Ponyville into this—this labor camp!” Spike nodded fiercely in agreement.
Applejack snorted. “Don’t make me laugh, sugarcube.” She spread her arms. “Ponyville is better than ever! Everybody is workin’ for Sweet Apple Acres in perfect harmony! There’s no arguin’ or foolin’ around, only the feelin’ of a job well done.” Applejack shook her head. “Ah’ thought you of all people would understand that, but ah’ guess you just need the right motivation.” She snapped her fingers and six drones leapt on Twilight and Spike, taking away the backpack from the later and holding them both from their arms and shoulders. I watched horrified as two more drones approached carrying each one a black helmet. Spike called fearfully. “Twilight?” She stood firm and assured. “It’s okay, Spike.” They did not make any attempt to resist.
My hands were shaking. Was this part of her plan too? Or did she make a mistake? What the hell was I supposed to do now? Release some sheep to cause a stampede? Ride a cow and charge towards the crowd? Bombard them with apples? A sudden whimper got my attention. A scruffy and dirty dog sat next to me, looking with exhausted eyes. I frowned as I recognized the animal. “Winona?” Her ears perked up at the sound of her name and she wagged her tail weakly.
It was as if a switch flipped inside my head. I stood up fully and shouted. “That’s enough!” The drones froze and turned in unison, watching me intently as I marched towards them. Spike blinked in surprise while Twilight smiled confidently.
Applejack quirked an eyebrow and said. “Ah’ don’t think I’ve seen you before.” I said drily. “My name is Joe.” She chuckled. “Are you lookin’ for a job, Joe? We got plenty of vacants!” I wordlessly activated my Duel Disk. Cut me some slack, will you? The whole “witty lines” thing is harded than it seems. Applejack glanced at Twilight. “Ah’ figured you would have a plan, but ah’ gotta say ah’ was expectin’ somethin’ more impressive.” Twilight did not say anything.
I gritted my teeth and growled. “Why don’t you let your cards do the talking?” Applejack laughed out loud. Oh, come on! I’m pretty sure nobody laughed at Kaiba or Yugi when they said stuff like that! She made a gesture and the old lady at her side handed her a Duel Disk, which she adjusted around her left arm. As she walked forward, the crowd spread open, forming a circle around us. Twilight and Spike were still firmly held in place. Applejack ignited her Duel Disk and our life points appeared above us at 4000 each. She smirked and said. “Ah’ don’t mind taking a break once in a while.” We drew our initial hand of five cards. “And as soon as I’m done with you, we’re all goin’ back to work.” With that declaration, she drew her first card and immediately summoned Amazoness Sword Woman . The tall woman swinged her large blade single-handedly once before letting it rest casually over her broad shoulders. Applejack declared the end of her turn.
An “Amazoness Deck”? Interesting. I knew one or two things about them. I drew a card and examined my hand. Minotaurus , Saggi the Dark Clown and La Jinn the Demonic Spirit of the Lamp ; Hypnotism , Cyclops and one copy of my Blue-Eyes White Dragon. I made a mental note of trimming the deck later before summoning my first monster. “Minotaurus!” The tall, half-man half-bull appeared on the field with a loud bellow.
Amazoness Sword Woman’s effect would transfer all the battle damage to me, true, but with a difference of only 200 attack points, it was a small price to pay for the field advantage. I ordered the attack of my monster. “Axe Crusher!” The Minotaurus’ axe easily cut through the amazon’s sword and body; shards of her broken blade flying everywhere, with a single one of them grazing my left side and taking my life points down to 3800.
A sudden sharp pain assaulted my side. I couldn’t even scream. The cards fell from my hands as I held my left side tightly and dropped on my knees. What the hell? I knew this thing was pretty realistic, but it wasn’t like this when I dueled Spike! From the sidelines, Twilight said urgently. “It’s an illusion, Joe! It’s not real!” Not real? I looked at my right hand. Blood. You have to be kidding me. Not real? How the hell can this not be real when I’m feeling the warm and wetness of my blood with my own hands?
Applejack chuckled. “Hey now, you ain’t workin’ for me if you can’t take a bit of roughing, partner!” She went ahead and began her turn. “Draw! Amazoness Chain Master !” The muscular woman appeared on her side of the field, holding a chain with a large spike on one end and glaring at me. Applejack continued by playing Amazoness Curse Master , swapping the attack values of our monsters. She ordered her monster. “Chain Dance of Death!” The Amazoness Chain Master swung her chain overhead and lauched it forward with astonishing speed, nailing the Minotaurus on the ribs.
The attack took another 200 points of my life, leaving me with 3600, but as I doubled over and struggled to breathe, I could’ve sworn I lost a million. Applejack said something, don’t ask me what. I was so focused on bearing the pain that her voice, as well as that of Twilight and Spike, was like a whisper to me. I needed to defend. That was the only thing I could think of. I slowly picked up my cards and drew one from my deck. Clone Reproduction . Good. I set it and put Saggi the Dark Clown face-down. I muttered. “I’m done.”
Applejack swiftly drew a card. “I think I’m goin’ to put you on toilet cleanin’ duty.” She activated the spell Bait Doll . Damn it. My Clone Reproduction was forcibly activated and destroyed. She shuffled Bait Doll back into her deck and summoned Amazoness Pet Tiger . The large, one-eyed feline roared as its attack points went up to 1900. I shut my eyes and gritted my teeth. First came the sound of my monster getting ripped to shreds, then the pain of the chain hitting my back and putting my life points on 2100.
How did this happen? One minute I was walking tall and now I’m curled up and with my head nearly touching the ground. I glanced at Twilight and Spike. What was she trying to tell me? “Dark magic! It’s King Sombra’s specialty! It’s stimulating your brain to create the hallucination of pain!” He did some kind of illusion stuff on the show too, right? I found myself staring at their faces. Their expressions of worry, pain and fear. Then the realization hit me like a fist. They had dueled like this themselves, didn’ they? They had experienced this kind of pain. I picured them both on the ground, in pain and struggling like I was right now. A feeling of shame, followed by anger came over me.
I took a breath. One, two, three. Left leg first, then the right one. I stood up once again with both arms at my sides and declared. “Not yet.” Twilight and Spike smiled in relief. I shouted. “Draw!” I examined my newly drew card. It would do. I set a monster face-down and finished my turn.
Applejack chuckled. “Not bad. I’ll promote you to pickin’ apples.” She drew a card, summoned Amazoness Sage , increasing the attack points of her Amazoness Pet Tiger to 2300, and commanded. “Rip him to shreds!” I smirked as my face-down monster was revealed. “Magic Lamp !” The Pet Tiger made a sharp turn and charged at the Amazoness Chain Master, who launched her chain at the last minute and snatched the Blue-Eyes White Dragon from my hand, before the tiger took her down with a single slash to the neck.
Applejack didn’t seem bothered by her life points going drastically down, from her initial 4000 to 1700, thanks to the battle damage and the cost of the Amazoness Chain Master’s effect. She waved the Blue-Eyes White Dragon card with a smirk and taunted. “I’m definitely callin’ this little fella on my next turn!” Damn it. That was a smart move. She must have seen it when I dropped my cards.
I looked at my deck. So this is how it’s going to be? Betting everything on a draw with my life and that of dozens of people at stake? What did Kaiba say in moments like these? Shit, I don’t remember. I held the top card of my deck and pulled with all my strenght. “DRAW!” I looked at the card and smiled. Guess all those fancy moves do pay off. I summoned La Jinn the Demonic Spirit of the Lamp with the effect of my Magic Lamp and sacrificed them both. “Come, Blue-Eyes White Dragon!” Seto Kaiba’s best monster appeared on the field with a roar that shook the ground. Its scales shone under the light of the sun like the finest diamond. Twilight and Spike stood in awe at the majestic beast, and I finally understood why Kaiba likes to plaster it on everything he owns.
Applejack gritted her teeth. “Ah’ can’t believe it!”
Imagine every single upset you had in your life. The kind you bottled up because you had no choice or figured it wasn’t worth it. Maybe dealing with a particularly nasty customer or that reckless cyclist that nearly made you crash. Imagine taking all those emotions and releasing them at once with just two words. “BURST STREAM!” The Blue-Eyes White Dragon reared its head back and fired a stream of lightning, completely disintegrating the Amazoness Pet Tiger. Applejack staggered backwards, her life points going down to 600. I played Hypnotism and declared. “It’s over, Applejack! You won’t be able to stop my next attack!”
Applejack glared at me and drew a card, examining it briefly before smirking and taunting. “Oh yeah?” She summoned a second Amazoness Sword Woman and declared her attack on my Blue-Eyes White Dragon. I closed my eyes. Twilight and Spike called my name. The pain coursed all over my body. I could not fail. My father would not forgive me, my mother would be heartbroken and my brother would be angry beyond words. My friends would miss me. Spike would probably be upset he didn’t get to duel me again. Twilight…no, I don’t want to think about it. I opened my eyes. We both now had 600 life points left. Applejack was in shock. I asked. “Anything else?” I took her silence as a reply, drew my card and pointed my finger at her Amazoness Sage. “Burst Stream.” Lightning flashed and the sound of thunder echoed as my Blue-Eyes White Dragon attacked.
I sat down, my body feeling like a sack of gravel, and looked at my right hand. Not a single drop of blood. Guess it was an illusion after all. I looked up, my Blue-Eyes had vanished and Applejack had been knocked down. All around us the inhabitants of Ponyville came back to their senses, the black helmets having been shattered into countless pieces. Was it the power of my Blue-Eyes White Dragon?
Twilight hurriedly went to check on Applejack while Spike did the same for me. "Joe! Are you okay?" I nodded and smiled. Damn it. I was just too tired to say something cool.
I wiped the fog from the mirror and stared at my reflection. Not a single scratch or mark on my sides or my back. Yet it felt so real. I tied the towel to my waist while thinking about all cards out there that could inflict direct damage to my life points; like Torture Wheel and Fire Ball . What would happen if my opponent used those? Would I feel the pain of my bones breaking or my flesh burning? And what if I lost?
A voice from the other side of the bathroom’s door interrupted my thoughts. “Joe? I’m leaving your clothes on the bed.” I quickly replied. “Thank you, Big Mac.”
Big MacIntosh was a tall and robust young man with tanned skin. He had short reddish hair and the same emerald green eyes as his sister, Applejack. Mac wore brown work boots, blue jeans and a short sleeved, red lumberjack shirt. Despite his size, that made you feel like he could pick you up and threw you over the horizon, he carried himself in the same calm and easy-going way he displayed on the show.
The guest room was barely furnished, with only a single bed, a nightstand and a small wardrobe. Nonetheless, it was quite cozy. I even had my own bathroom, complete with sink, toilet and a showerhead. All in all, it was pretty much all I could ask for.
Just like Mac said, every single piece of my clothing, the coat Twilight gave me included, was neatly folded in a pile on the bed. I could even smell the perfume of the soap they used to wash it. Apple scented, of course. I smiled appreciatively. After yesterday’s incident, Applejack insisted I had to stay and rest in her house. The fact the Golden Oak Library was in the middle of the Everfree Forest made her offer difficult to resist.
Still wrapped in a towel, I approached the nearby window, from where the light of the morning sun illuminated nearly every corner of the room. I could see the tall and thick trees, their branches filled to the brim with big, juicy apples. The whole field was so full of life. No wonder Applejack often contented herself with sitting down and gazing at them for hours.
I turned around and almost had a stroke when I saw three young girls of about fourteen years-old standing in front of me. Both of my hands instinctively grasped the knot of my towel. The Cutie Mark Crusaders? Yeah, ponies or not, there was no way I could mistake them. Applebloom, who I had met yesterday, had long, bright red hair tied with a pink ribbon and amber colored eyes. She wore brown shoes, blue jean shorts and a yellow shirt. Curiously enough, she lacked the tan her older sister and brother had. Scootaloo had short, messy purple hair and brown eyes. She wore grey sneakers, green gym shorts and a black shirt. She had a band aid on both knees and elbows. I guess scooter accidents happen. Finally, Sweetie Belle had long, curly light purple hair and light green eyes. She wore sandals and a pure white sundress that went down below her knees.
Applebloom announced cheerfully. “Girls, this is Joe.” She then pointed at her companions. “Joe, these are mah’ friends, Scootaloo and Sweetie Belle.” I meekly waved at them with my right hand, while keeping a firm grasp on the towel’s knot with my left, and said. “Hi, girls.” Applebloom put both hands on her hips, puffed out her chest and said with pride. “See? Ah’ told you we had a human living in our house!” Right. Where’s my share of the admission ticket sales?
Scootaloo and Sweetie Belle approached me from the sides. The former with both hands crossed over her chest and a frown of suspicion on her face, and the later with both hands behind her back and tilting her head with curiosity. Sweetie Belle said. “Are you sure he’s from another world? He doesn’t look too different to me.” I felt a pair of hands moving my towel around. “Whoa!” I jumped against the wall, once again grasping the knot of my towel with both hands. Scootaloo blinked in bewilderment and said. “He doesn’t have a Cutie Mark.” Both, Applebloom and Sweetie Belle looked at me with a mixture of surprise and fascination.
I asked. “Cutie Mark?” I already knew about them, but since I still had to play dumb, the question seemed appropiate. Applebloom replied. “Yep! They show our special talent.” Sweetie Belle added. “And every Equestrian has one.” I nodded slowly. Now that I think about it, I haven’t seen a single Cutie Mark since I arrived here.
Scootaloo must have mistaken my thoughtful silence with disbelief since she said. “Here, look!” Much to my surprise, she turned her left side towards me and pulled down her shorts below her knees. “See? This is my Cutie Mark!” Applebloom followed suit, pulling her shorts down to her knees, and Sweetie Belle was last, lifting her skirt up to her waist.
Now, I would like to tell you how I immediately noticed they all had the Cutie Marks they obtained in “Crusaders of the Lost Mark”, but I believe the order my brain processed the information went like this. They all had really cute asses. Scootaloo was going commando, Applebloom was wearing white cotton panties, which she pulled down along with her shorts, and Sweetie Belle was wearing bright pink panties.
So yeah, for nearly ten seconds I, an adult man, stood dressed with only a towel and being practically flashed by three teenage girls. I’m pretty sure you could’ve cut my awkwardness with a plastic butter knife. I nodded slowly and said. “Cool.” The girls all covered themselves and I began breathing again. I shook my head and said. “We, humans, do not have Cutie Marks like you.” The three girls looked at each other in confusion. Sweetie Belle asked. “How do you know what your special talent is?” I shrugged and said. “Trial and error, I guess.”
Scootaloo asked. “What’s your special talent then?” I dunno. Paperwork? Before I could answer, Applebloom said enthusiastically. “If you don’t know, we can help you!” I blinked. The three girls looked at each other, nodded and struck a pose. They declared altogether. “We are the Cutie Mark Crusaders!” Applebloom said. “Our speciality is helping others find their special talents!” Sweetie Belle added. “No matter how difficult it gets!” Scootaloo finished. “Or how long it takes!” I nodded with an amused smile. That was catchy. “Thank you, girls. But I’m pretty sure my special talent is Duel Monsters.” That wasn’t very accurate. I haven’t participated on a single tournament or played with anybody beyond my brother, who won two thirds of all our games, but I needed to say something to get these three out of my back. As fascinating as this conversation was, I was still wearing nothing beyond a towel.
The girls deflated. Applebloom noted. “That explains how you beat mah’ sister.” Suddenly, Scootaloo snapped her fingers in realization. “Wait! That means you can teach us everything there’s to know about the game!” What? Sweetie Belle nodded quickly. “All your secret combos and tactics!” I haven’t even finished checking this deck yet! The girls looked at me with pleading eyes. I sighed in defeat. “Sure.” The three of them cheered loudly. Applebloom pointed a finger at me and declared. “We’ll get ready and come back for you, okay?” I nodded. Satisfied, they rushed out of the room. I let out a breath of relief. Thank God. It was getting cold in here. That and the last thing I needed was somebody coming in and asking me to take a seat over there.
Now fully dressed, I went down the stairs and into the kitchen, where I found Twilight and Spike sitting around the dining table and waiting for me. She was not wearing her coat or her glasses, her jacket was partially unbuttoned and she looked somewhat dishveled. He wasn’t much better, resting his head on the table with both arms hanging lazily at his sides.
Spike grinned widely. “Hey, Joe.” I grinned back and we bumped fists. Twilight smiled. “Hi, Joe.” She tilted her head and asked. “Feeling better now?” I nodded as I took a seat between the two of them. The table was filled with plates containing several kinds of apple dishes, from slices of apple pie and apple fritters to apple dumplings and apple crisps; plus two glass jars filled with water and apple juice respectively.
I immediately thought of Granny Smith and how she asked me if I liked apples. She was an elderly lady around her eighties; filled with wrinkles and with her long, white hair neatly tied into a bun. She wore sandals with yellow socks up above her knees, a light green skirt and a white shirt with the sleeves rolled up to her elbows. Finally, she also had an orange handkerchief tied around her neck. Despite her advanced age, Granny Smith brimmed with energy and had a strenght you wouldn’t expect from a thin, little old lady. Suffice to say my right hand needed five whole minutes to fully recover from her friendly shake.
Twilight told me Applejack was busy and she would join us shortly. She rested both arms over the table and said solemnly. “In the meantime, I imagine you must have several questions.” Spike quickly raised his right hand. He whined. “Can we please eat first, Twilight?” She chidingly called his name and he groaned. Twilight let out an exasperated sigh, but before she could say anything else, her stomach growled audibly. I stiffled a chuckle. She blushed slightly and explained. “We were busy putting the Golden Oak Library back in place, so we haven’t had anything to eat yet.” I smiled sympathetically. “It’s okay, why don’t we eat first then talk?” Spike took my words as his cue and began wolfing down on the apple dumplings before Twilight called his name again and he apologized. Or at least that’s what I thought; it was difficult to understand him with his mouth full and all. Smiling in amusement, I grabbed an apple fritter, took a bite and munched. Yep. It looked good and tasted even better. I couldn’t help but feel embarrassed for receiving this much kindness and hospitality in such a short time.
We enjoyed the food in silence for a while. Once it seemed everybody was satisfied, Twilight calmly wiped her mouth and began explaining unprompted. “As you probably guessed, Applejack was the one who drove us out of Ponyville two weeks ago.” I took a gulp of apple juice, wiped my mouth and listened attentively. “She had left to deliver an order of half a dozen apple barrels to a garrison of Royal Guards stationed at the nearby town of Hollow Shades, but when she came back, she was different and, what’s worse, accompained by Sombra’s forces.” She crossed both arms over her chest. “The attack took us by surprise and we had no choice but to retreat deep into the Everfree Forest.” I leaned forward, resting both arms over the table. Twilight continued. “After watching you duel Spike, I came to the conclusion the best course of action was to distract her so you could sneak in and challenge her directly.” I nodded and asked tentatively. “What about the duel I had with her?” Her expression turned grim. “What you experienced back then was a Game of Darkness.” I frowned in bewilderment. A Game of Darkness? Like the ones used by Dark Bakura and Dark Malik to torment his opponents? Twilight explained. “It happens when a Duel Disk absorbs enough dark magic.” I put my right clenched right hand over my mouth and glared at the table. Unbelievable. First the card game, then the Duel Disks and now the Ancient Egyptian Magic too? What else could there be?
My concentration was broken when Spike asked meekly. “You’re not angry, are you, Joe?” I tilted my head and looked at him puzzled. “Twilight did not mean for you to get hurt or anything.” He added. “She just didn’t see it coming.” I blinked and turned to Twilight. She was looking down, biting her lower lip with an expression of shame. Did she feel guilty for the pain I felt on that duel?
I smiled and said. “I’m not angry.” I scratched the back of my neck in embarrassement. “In fact, I’m kind of honored.” Both, Twilight and Spike, looked at me in confusion. “I mean, the whole plan would’ve fallen apart if I decided to run away instead of following you or if I had lost the duel, right? But you still choose to trust me, a guy you knew for less than a couple of hours, with your lives and the fate of the entire town.” I shrugged and grinned. “How could I possibly feel angry after receiving those sentiments?” Damn, that was cheesy; I’m going to need a lot of practice before pulling another speech.
Spike grinned proudly and slapped me on the back. Ouch. Twilight gave me that glowing smile of hers that made you feel like getting lost in her eyes. She said. “Thank you, Joe.” I felt my cheeks heating up. “It was nothing.” Just in case, I went ahead and asked. “Does Applejack know how to use dark magic?” Twilight shook her head. “Definitely not, but it would be possible to achieve the same results by infusing a Duel Disk with said magic. Still, that’s not the thing that baffles me the most about this incident.” I frowned and asked. “What is it?” She looked at me. “Applejack was not wearing a helmet, remember?” I blinked. That’s true. Twilight continued. “I have no doubt she was under the influence of dark magic, but I have no records of King Sombra controlling others by different means.” I scratched my chin as I pondered. “So, either Sombra learned some new magic.” Twilight finished my sentence. “Or that was the work of somebody else.”
A sudden bark caught our attention. Winona came running into the kitchen. The dog’s fur was pristine and was she was full of her usual energy, perhaps even moreso. Soon, Applejack came jogging behind her. “Sorry ‘bout the late, everybody!” My jaw dropped. It’s amazing how different people look when they’re not trying to kill you with a card game. She was far more beautiful now with that cheerful smile across her face instead of the hateful grin from yesterday. Not only that, but her arms, legs and ass were in much better shape than what I thought. Her white shirt was tied up, revealing her well defined abs. All in all, she could easily pass for a Mixed Martial Arts fighter. Last but definitely not least, she was soaking wet, to the point that her shirt had turned practically transparent. “Ah’ was busy fixin’ the sprinklers!” That certainly explains it.
Applejack sat down, took a big gulp of apple juice straight from the jar and asked. “Did you sleep well, Joe?” I nodded rapidly. Look at her face. She’s got a pretty face. Look at it. “Great! Ah’ was afraid the room may have been a bit too bare for your like.” I shook my head rapidly and said. “It was perfect, Applejack. I really appreciate what your family has done for me.” She smiled. “You’re welcome, sugarcube. It’s the least we could do after you helped us.” I gulped and clenched my fists. Her pink, puffy nipples were perfectly visible and contrasting beautifully with her tanned breasts. Applejack grabbed an apple fritter and took a bite out of it. She spoke with her mouth half full. “Everybody’s been workin’ hard to put Ponyville back in shape, and ah’ been tryin’ to help as much as ah’ could.” I know! Think about card games. There’s the Black Magician Girl —damn it, not that one! She swallowed and sighed. “It’s the least I could do.”
Twilight frowned with concern and asked. “Have you managed to remember anything else about that day, Applejack?”
Applejack looked down and shook her head. “I don’t remember anythin’ sides of wakin’ up and findin’ out ah’ had turned into a consarned slave driver.” She gritted her teeth and slammed the table with her right hand, making the three of us jump in our seats. I have no doubt she could have easily broken the thing in half if she tried.
Twilight bit her lower lip, Spike gulped and even Winona let out a whimper of sympathy. I gritted my teeth. Mind control was certainly troublesome in the show, but I never thought about how terrible it would be for those affected. My brain worked at full capacity to think of who could have done such thing. Was it Discord? The Changeling Queen? Sirens? Was I dealing with the unknown here? Or just the familiar in a different way?
The kitchen was in silence. I shook my head. I needed to say something to change the mood. “Hey, Applejack.” All the presents turned to look at me. “Twilight told me how you once fought a terrible enemy called Nightmare Moon.” Applejack nodded. “Eeyup! It was a hard fight, but we won with some good ol’ teamwork.” I made a couple of punching motions and asked. “It’s true you beat her into submission?” Applejack laughed loudly. Success. “Well, ah’ ain’t one to boast, partner.” She turned sideways on her seat and lifted her amazing legs up. The pose reminded me of one of those pin up girls. Damn it, why did I have to forget my cell phone? “But ah’ made sure to show her what "Bucky McGillycuddy" and "Kicks McGee" could do!” We all shared a good laugh. Nice to see that, hooves or not, Applejack still gave her legs those nicknames.
The Cutie Mark Crusaders came running into the kitchen, all of them with a Duel Disk adjusted to their left arms. Sweetie Belle announced. “We’re here!” Scootaloo lifted her Duel Disk with a grin and said. “It’s time to duel!” Applebloom finished. “Eeyup!” Applejack lifted an unamused eyebrow and asked. “Did you three finish your chores?” They flinched simultaneously and she grumbled. I quickly interjected. “I’m sorry, Applejack. It’s my fault; I promised I’d play with them.” Applejack smiled. “Alright, you three can have a break.” The Cutie Mark Crusaders cheered and I mouthed a “thank you” to Applejack.
Twilight smiled. She asked. “Shall we watch, Spike?” He grinned and nodded.
After taking a minute to retrieve my Duel Disk, we set up behind the farm house. While the Cutie Mark Crusaders were deciding the order of play, I glanced at our audience. Applejack’s shirt looked like it wasn’t drying anytime soon, even in this pleasantly warm weather. She had both arms crossed, resulting in her breasts being pushed upwards. My God. How am I supposed to concentrate with those puppies looking at me? I chuckled and shook my head. Sweetie Belle stood in front of me, ready to play. We ignited our Duel Disks, drew our initial five cards and our life points appeared above us at 4000 each. I smiled and said. “Ladies first.”
“Thank you!” Sweetie Belle drew a card, examined her hand carefully and set a single card before finishing her turn.
That’s it? I drew a card with a smirk and activated the spell Fusion , combining my Minotaurus and Kentauros into a single monster. “Minocentaur !” The half-minotaur half-horse appeared on the field rearing back and letting out a loud bellow that made several birds on the nearby trees fly away. I noticed Sweetie Belle gulped and looked at me intently. Did she have a trap prepared? Let’s find out. “Direct attack!” With a mighty swing of its axe, my Minocentaur got Sweetie Belle’s life points down to half. She immediately activated her set card. “Scapegoat!” Four horned furry balls appeared on the field with a chorus of cute cries. What was that? Did she got scared and forgot to activate her card to protect her life points? I looked at the remaining cards in my hand. Bell of Destruction , Defense Sealing and The Flute of Summoning Dragon. I could finish this on her turn with my Bell of Destruction. Nah, there was no need to be cruel. I’ll wait for my next turn and use Defense Sealing on a goat token. “Turn end!”
Sweetie Belle drew a card and smiled widely. A good draw, I guess? She immediately summoned Maha Vailo . What was she planning? She declared loudly. “I activate Power of Unity !” That card! My eyes widened as Maha Vailo’s attack skyrocketed up to 6050. Sweetie Belle pointed a finger and ordered. “Holy Lightning!” Black clouds formed above us as Maha Vailo raised his hands and summoned a lightning bolt which he directed at my Minocentaur. I had to cover my eyes as my monster was vaporized along with my whole 4000 life points.
Applejack whistled. “Whoa Nelly!” Spike cringed and Twilight watched attentively in silence. I couldn’t believe it. A one turn kill? I huffed angrily. Calm down. It was just a stroke of luck. Sweetie Belle high-fived both, Scootaloo and Applebloom; the later whom now stood before me. I re-shuffled my deck. We both drew five cards, our life points flashing at 4000 each. Now I was getting serious. “I’ll go first! Draw!” I played my Magic Lamp face-down. Try something funny, Applebloom, and you’ll be getting a nasty surprise. “Turn end!”
Much to my surprise, Applebloom played a monster face-down, a set card and finished her turn. The confident smile across her face made me doubt. No! Not now. Not in front of everybody! I shook my head and swiftly drew a card. I revealed my Magic Lamp and summoned La Jinn the Demonic Spirit of the Lamp with its effect, before sacrificing it to summon Judge Man. “Crush it, Judge Man!” The tall, mace-wielding warrior charged forward and attacked Applebloom’s monster; revealing the Nimble Flying Squirrel . The tiny rodent was decimated instantly, yet a loud shriek from beyond the grave increased Applebloom’s life points by 1000. She took two copies of her squirrel from her deck and played them face-down. I scoffed and ordered the attack of La Jinn. The demonic spirit breathed a stream of fire that incinerated the squirrel on the right, leaving not a single stray hair. Applebloom’s life points went up to 6000. I flared my nose. “Turn end!”
“Mah turn!” Applebloom smirked. She sacrificed her squirrel. “Twinheaded Beast !” From a wall of fire emerged a centaur with two heads like that of a lion. Its whole body was covered by flickering flames. Applebloom continued by playing Wild Nature's Release , bringing her monster’s attack points to 3600. “Double Fireball!” The Twinheaded Beast created a ball of fire on each hand, hurling them at terrific speed and decimating my two monsters in the blink of an eye. I braced myself as the flames rolled over me, taking my life points down to a mere 800. Before I could even lower my arms, I head Applebloom’s voice. “Trap card open! Cattle Mutilation !” She replaced the Twinheaded Beast in her field with one in her hand and attacked again. My life points went down to zero. I gritted my teeth. My blood boiled and I wanted to take this damn deck and hurl it on the roof of the farm house. How could this be?
Scootaloo was my last opponent. It took me several breaths to calm down. As before, I re-shuffled my deck, we drew our initial hands and our life point counters stood at 4000 each. I took the first turn again. I drew a card, examined my hand and smiled in satisfaction. Third time’s the charm. I summoned Dragon's Ruler and activated The Flute of Summoning Dragon. This was it! My strongest combo! The warrior clad in an armor made of dragon bones blew the flute, calling two Blue-Eyes White Dragons from my hand. How do you like it, huh? Sweetie Belle and Applebloom stood in awe, and so did Applejack and Spike. Scootaloo gulped and Twilight frowned. Okay, maybe I overdid it a bit, but after what happened in the last two games, can you blame me? I pointed forwards and declared with a confident smirk. “Turn end!”
“Draw!” Scootaloo drew a card dynamically and held it upwards. “I activate Power Bond !” The fusion spell for machines? She continued. “I fuse two Cycroid into Pair Cycroid !” A red tandem bicycle with cartoonish eyes and arms appeared on the field. I narrowed my eyes as I tried to remember the monster’s effect. Unfortunately, I never cared much about Vehicroids. Scootaloo pointed her right fist towards me and declared. “Direct attack!” Ah, that was it. The Pair Cycroid spun its wheels with alarming speed, kicking up a cloud of dirt and launched itself towards me. I crossed both arms in front of my face. It was a risky play; she probably had a card to protect herself, but I had a copy of Magic Removal in my hand.
Imagine my surprise when Scootaloo said. “Limiter Removal!” The Pair Cycroid attack points went from a boosted 3200 to 6400. Let me tell you, there are few things more humillating that getting one-shotted by a cartoon bicycle. My Blue-Eyes White Dragon vanished without having moved a single claw; almost like if they had been played only to provide a show.
Spike put both hands behind his head and groaned. “Aw man!” Applejack chuckled and commented amused. “Now that was unexpected!” The Cutie Mark Crusaders congratulated each other before striking a victory pose while Winona ran in circles around them, barking and wagging her tail.
My legs wobbled. Three consecutive one turn kills at the hands of three teenage girls. Was I dreaming? But it wasn’t over. Twilight walked up to me and called my name. I looked at her; she had a Duel Disk around her left arm. “Stand up, Joe. I want you to duel me.”
“I want you to duel me.” Right now? Isn’t there, like, a saying about this? Don’t kick a man while he’s down or something? I pointed at my Duel Disk and asked. “Can I make some adjustments to my deck first?” Twilight replied drily. “Would that make any difference?” I raised both eyebrows in disbelief. “Yes?” She shook her head slightly. “You didn’t need to make adjustments before dueling Spike and Applejack.” Yeah, well, it’s still three loses against two wins; one and a half if you consider the fact Applejack had me by the balls during the majority of the game. Twilight quirked an eyebrow. “Are you sure it was the deck and not you, Joe?” I frowned. She continued. “Weren’t there any other plays you could’ve made? Any cards you could’ve used to defend yourself?” I blinked. Bell of Destruction . Nah, there was no need to be cruel.
Twilight glanced at the Cutie Mark Crusaders. The three girls remained silent, as if they were witnessing a teacher rightfully scolding a classmate. “The plays made by the girls were nothing too complicated. In fact, they were some the most basic combinations available for those cards.” Twilight crossed both arms over her chest. Somehow, she seemed taller. “You underestimated Sweetie Belle, Joe. After that, you kept rushing in like an angry bull.” My mouth opened and closed like a fish gasping for air. Evidently her lecturing skills were as sharp as in the show. “A duelist’s greatest enemy lies in his own mind. Fear, anger, etc.” I lowered my head in shame. I did not like to lose. Who does? But getting trounced without being able to do almost anything was a sore spot for me. Twilight concluded with a single statement. “You will never achieve victory if your thoughts get clouded by those emotions.”
I was about to apologize when Applejack interjected. “Or a girl’s wet shirt.” I turned around sharply and saw her looking away, whistling innocently. Applejack then glanced and, when she saw I was looking at her, grinned widely. Oh my God. She had noticed. Twilight unsuccessfully tried to hold back her laughter. Even the Cutie Mark Crusaders were laughing. Spike looked around puzzled before shrugging and deciding he might as well laugh too. I covered my face with my right hand. Even with the lack of a mirror, I could tell my skin had taken a shade of red that had nothing to envy the apples around us. Just as I was wondering if my pants would fall down too, I felt a hand on my shoulder. “Don’t get upset, sugarcube.” Applejack told me with a comforting smile. “We were just teasin’ you.” She winked and added. “Sides, ah’ don’t mind if you want to look.” Applejack went back to the sidelines as I stared dumbfounded. Wow. I closed my eyes, took a deep breath and exhaled. My anger and frustration disappeared, and I found myself smiling widely.
Twilight chuckled in amusement and asked. “Are you ready, Joe?” I re-shuffled my deck and answered. “Bring it on!” Spike and The Cutie Mark Crusaders cheered for both of us as we drew our initial hands; our life points appearing briefly above us at 4000 each. I drew my first card and activated Cost Down, discarding a card to lower the level of all my monsters by two. “Next! Sword Stalker of Revenge !” The demonic warrior appeared swinging his sword with a wide grin of anticipation on his face. I set two cards. “Turn end.”
Twilight drew a card between her delicate fingers. She examined her hand carefully. “Rapid-Fire Magician .” I frowned. Twilight had showed me the Black Magician when we first met. It wouldn’t surprise me if she were a magician user. Twilight followed by playing Mallet of Luck , shuffling her whole hand into her deck and drawing a new one. “Spellbook Organization.” She looked at the top three cards of her deck, rearranged them and put them back. “Angel's Charity .” Twilight drew three cards and discarded two, Spell Absorption and Serial Spell. For every spell Twilight played, the Rapid-Fire Magician fired a magical bolt, taking away 400 of my life points. I shielded myself as the magician kept firing; alternating between his scepters like a cowboy handling two revolvers.
The assault continued. Twilight played Pot of Greed, drawing two cards, followed by Spell Reproduction, discarding Spell Economics and Sage's Jewel , to get Pot of Greed back from her graveyard. She played Pot of Greed again to draw two cards, which she immediately set, leaving her with a single card in her hand. I let my arms down in exhaustion as the Rapid-Fire Magician ceased his barrage, twirling his scepters and casually resting them over his shoulders with a smug smile on his face. Unbelievable. She got my life points down to 2000 in just one turn and using the effect of a single monster. I grinned. My heart was pounding. Just like in my first duel here.
Twilight calmly declared the end of her turn. I drew a card and examined my situation. Her monster was no match for mine. Her sets cards, however, were an entirely different matter. Still, I pointed my finger and ordered. “Take him down!” My Sword Stalker charged forward and Twilight activated her set Dimension Magic . I knew it. She offered her Rapid-Fire Magician and from the iron maiden emerged a light-skinned man. He wore a blue robe with red trims and held a sapphire scepter on his right hand. His expression was solemn yet confident. Twilight called the monster’s name with pride. “The ultimate wizard! Black Magician !” The Black Magician made a gesture; the iron maiden quickly swallowed my Sword Stalker and disappeared under the ground.
Undaunted, I activated one of my set cards. “Resurrection of the Dead !” A pillar of light erupted in the middle of the field and my Blue-Eyes White Dragon emerged. Twilight smiled approvingly. “I take that was the card you discarded to play Cost Down?” I nodded. To my surprise, she chuckled and said. “That won’t help you!” Twilight raised her right hand upwards. “Trap card open! Magical Explosion !” The Black Magician raised his scepter; multiple orbs of green light appeared circling around him. “I can only activate this card when my hand is empty.” My eyes widened. All those spells were not just to activate the effect of her Rapid-Fire Magician. “And it inflicts 200 points of damage for each spell card in my graveyard!” I did a quick checking. She had ten spell cards in her graveyard.
The Black Magician pointed his scepter forward with both hands and unleashed a stream of emerald magical energy that went past my dragon and hit me fully, kicking up a cloud of dust and even making me stumble backwards a few feet. Twilight declared. “It’s over.” I suppose I could have declared the activation of my trap card, but comebacks are much more dramatic when you let your opponent and the audience figure out what happened. Twilight noted in surprise. “You still have 600 life points left.” I pointed at my open trap card. “Holy Elf's Blessing .” I smiled and said. “I believe it’s your turn now.”
Twilight did not draw a card. Instead, she put her hand over her deck and said. “I surrender.” Both of our monsters vanished. I blinked puzzled. “But, why?” She smiled. “You already learned your lesson.” I quirked an eyebrow. “Lesson?” She nodded. “You corrected every single one of your mistakes and that’s enough for me.” I smiled and nodded. This Twilight may not be a Princess, but she certainly seems to have picked up a lot of Celestia’s teaching methods.
Scootaloo pumped her fist. “That was awesome!” I looked away in embarrassment. Sweetie Belle suggested enthusiastically. “How about a rematch?” Applebloom nodded rapidly. “We can make it you two against the three of us!” Me? Teaming up with Twilight? Before I could even start fantasizing about summoning Master of Dragon Knight with her, Applejack stomped her foot, getting the attention of all the presents. With both hands on her waist and a stern gaze on her face, she motioned with her head towards the farmhouse.
The Cutie Mark Crusaders let out a collective groan and marched inside with their heads down, escorted by Winona. I gave a smile of sympathy. Applejack said. “Ah’ know, but there’s still work to be done and we need all help we can get.” She sighed and added. “That and bein’ busy keeps those two from gettin’ too worried about their sisters.” I asked. “Sisters?” Twilight explained. “Sweetie Belle and Scootaloo are the little sisters of our friends, Rarity and Rainbow Dash respectively.” My eyes widened. “Really?” Applejack nodded. “Ah’ volunteered to take care of them while our friends went away to help with this whole war business.” I nodded. Scootaloo was Rainbow Dash’s actual sister here. Awesome. It made me happy knowing that there was at least one version of Equestria where she had her wish granted.
Twilight said casually. “I need to talk with Applejack for a bit, Joe.” She smiled and suggested. “Why don’t you go take a look around Ponyville? We’re still putting everything back in place, but I believe you’ll find it’s a beautiful little town filled with lots of friendly people.” I chuckled. Girl talk. Got it. “Spike will accompany you.” He grinned, pointed a thumb towards his chest and said. “I’ll give you my super-special-deluxe Ponyville tour.” I smiled and nodded. Looking at both, Twilight and Applejack, I waved with two fingers and said. “We’ll see you later then.”
We walked less than twenty steps when Twilight said playfully. “Make sure you don’t get distracted by a girl’s wet shirt!” I flinched. Applejack quickly added. “Or her short skirt!” Oh, come on! Am I that obvious? I fasten my pace, flustered. Spike called. “Wait for me, Joe!”
When not under the control of dark forces, Ponyville was a beautiful little town, colorful and vibrant. Everybody was working hard to clean up the place after the last two weeks and, as a result, I was almost completely spared of curious glances.
“I just want you to know, Joe.” I looked at Spike. “That I have no idea what the girls were joking about and only laughed because it got contagious.” I quirked an eyebrow. Really? He did not seem to be lying. Guess he’s still young for certain things. I smiled. “Thanks, Spike.”
I kept looking around. The fact there were far more female Equestrian than male ones was apparent. Funny. Ever since I arrived here I haven’t seen a single woman whom I could call ugly; they were all attractive in varying degrees. Even Granny Smith, with all those years piled on her, was clearly a looker on her younger days, and the Cutie Mark Crusaders will undoubtely grow up to be quite beautiful themselves.
Spike pointed his index finger finger towards a nearby house and announced. “That’s Quills and Sofas.” He explained enthusiastically. “That’s were Twilight sends me to buy her weekly supply of quills.” I nodded absentmindedly. What would the remaining Mane Six look like? After meeting Twilight and Applejack, I had high expectations. Particularly for Rarity and Fluttershy, considering the later’s brief modeling career. And the Princesses? In the show, their bodies were substantially different from most ponies. How would this translate into a human shape? Taller? Slender? Better endowed, perhaps? I shook my head. What would Batman say? Think clean thoughts, chum.
“That’s the Costume Shop!” I turned towards the house Spike was pointing to. “Did you know Twilight and I had to hide inside the window there once?” “The Ticket Master”, huh? Maybe I should try asking about the Grand Galloping Gala in the future. I tried to see if I could recognize any of the “background ponies” from the show, but all the bustle made it difficult. That and I did not want to look like a creep by staring too much.
We kept walking at a leisurely pace, with Spike pointing at different buildings and talking briefly about them. From the Joke Shop and the Bowling Alley to The Hay Burger and the Day Spa. I stood looking at the last one. How many times did the Mane Six went there to get massages, baths and other kind of treatments? And every single time they wore nothing beyond a bathrobe or just a towel. Spike broke me from my trance. “I think it’s closed for maintenance.” I blurted. “O-Oh, that’s a pity. Maybe next time.”
Our path took us to a tall, lavishly decorated building that stood out like an exquisite diamond among lesser gemstones. Spike pointed at it and announced with fanfare. “Welcome to Carousel Boutique, where every garment is chic, unique, and magnifique.” Heh. “A Dog and a Pony Show”. I smiled in amusement. How very fitting for Rarity. Just looking at the doorway made me feel like a peasant. Spike continued. “This is the house of our friend, Rarity. She went to Manehattan to assist in the war.” I nodded. Just like in the show. Spike looked wistfully at the house. He sighed. “I—we haven’t seen her in a while.” I put my hand over his shoulder, smiled sympathetically and said. “Don’t worry, Spike. I’m sure we’ll meet her again soon.” He smiled and nodded.
We resumed our tour. I looked up at the clear blue sky and closed my eyes, enjoying the gente breeze on my face, when I was suddenly struck from behind. The attack was swift and brutal, taking me completely by surprise and knocking me down. I heard Spike calling my name in shock. Bearing the pain in my back, I quickly stood up, keeping a crouching stance while trying to assess the threat. Did King Sombra send reinforcements? An assassin perhaps? How many of those wear mail carrier uniforms anyway? Wait a minute. That’s not right. It was a young girl, probably around her twenties, with long, messy blonde hair that went down her shoulders. She was quite attractive. The shorts of her uniform revealing her thin, shapely legs; her shirt partially unbuttoned and offering some decent cleavage. But what truly caught my attention was her eyes. They were amber colored and, how to put this charitably, crossed. I shook my head to get off the daze. Could she be?
The girl quickly blurted a series of apologies. I smiled and waved my hand, assuring her nothing was broken. She let out a breath of relief, checked her bag and, once she made sure nothing was lost, closed her eyes as if she was trying to concentrate. My jaw dropped. Wings. Traslucent, grayish feathery wings had sprouted from her back. I stood in awe as she flapped them once and took to the skies. Spike approached me. “Are you okay, Joe?” I pointed with a trembling finger and exclaimed. “She flew!” He nodded. “Yeah, that’s our mail carrier. She’s a bit on the ditzy side.” I kept watching as the girl flew away with my mouth open.
Spike chuckled, probably feeling like he was dealing with a child who had just discovered the existence of clouds, and explained. “It’s magic. It grants some Equestrians the power to fly and influence the weather.” I nodded rapidly. “Others, like Applejack, are stronger and can tend crops more easily.” He raised a finger. “Finally, you’ve got the likes of Twilight, who can focus her magic in more complex ways through her hands.” I smiled in amazement. They have the same abilities as Pegasi, Earth Ponies and Unicorns. I put a solemn face and said. “Why thank you, Professor Spike.” He did an exaggerated bow. “You are welcome, youngster.” We shared a laugh.
I wonder if anybody has ever tried to take a bite out of Sugarcube Corner. Not that I would blame them; the roof was so exquisitely decorated that it truly made you feel like they used cake frosting to build it. There was a tall, thin man sweeping the doorway. He had short orange hair, light green eyes and a bit of stubble across his face. He wore black shoes, blue pants and a white shirt. Spike greeted him. “Hi, Mr. Cake!” He greeted back and smiled apologetically. “I’m sorry, we’re doing some cleaning and we’re not open yet.” Spike waved his hand. “Nah, it’s okay. I just wanted to introduce you to my friend, Joe.” That was my cue. I approached and extended my hand. “It’s a pleasure.” Mr. Cake shook my hand energetically, introducing himself as Carrot Cake with a big smile across his face. He gave a vibe of pure kindness, just like in the show. “I heard about you! You’re the human Twilight called here, right?” Spike answered. “That’s right.”
Mr. Cake tightly held my hand with both of his and said. “Thank you for helping us, Joe!” I felt my cheeks heating up. “N-No, I mean—it was a team effort and you’re welcome.” Just then, a visibly pregnant woman came out of the house, asking whom he was talking to. She was shorter than me and slightly chubby, with light brown eyes and her pink hair stylized upwards. She wore slippers, a long brownish skirt and a white sweater. The woman greeted Spike, whom greeted her back with an enthusiastic “Hi, Mrs. Cake!”, and looked at me in surprise. “Oh dear, are you that human we’ve heard about?” Spike answered once more. “The same.”
Much like her husband, Mrs. Cake took my right hand between hers, introduced herself as Cup Cake and thanked me profusely. I shook my head. “I-It was nothing, Ma’am.” Mr. Cake hurriedly whispered in her ear. “Honey, you should be resting!” She frowned slightly. “It’s just a minute, Sweetie.” He bit his lower lip and gestured towards her belly. She sighed. “Fine, at least let me get the boys something to eat.” Mr. Cake shook his head. “Nuh-huh! I’ll do it!” With those words, he rushed into the house. Mrs. Cake giggled. “Sorry, boys; he just worries too much.” I gulped. “N-No problem.” Was it getting hot here? Yeah, as you probably guessed, Mrs. Cake was very pretty, and she had this sweet disposition that made you feel she could calm a raging dragon. That and her breasts were huge. I mean it. Don’t ask me how did she walk with those, I was too busy trying not to think about the size of her areolas and if her nipples were inverted. Fortunately for my blood pressure, Mr. Cake came out holding two big, tasty looking cupcakes. Like his wife’s breasts. Damn it, son.
Mrs. Cake gave Spike and I a cupcake each. “It’s not much, but make sure to come back another time and we’ll prepare a full course meal just for you.” Mr. Cake nodded. We exchanged goodbyes and continued our path through Ponyville.
I took a bite of my cupcake. It was really good. No wonder Pinkie could eat a dozen of these things. Spike finished his in record time. He commented casually. “Mrs. Cake is having twins.” Yeah, I don’t think I can blame Mr. Cake for that. “They are very nice, hardworking people; our friend, Pinkie, rents them a room.” Time to feing ignorance again. “Oh?” Spike nodded. “Yeah, she’s a talented baker and party planner.” He sighed. “Things have been quiet since she left for the frontlines.” I asked. “The frontlines?” Spike nodded. “Twilight said something about keeping up the morale of our troops.” So, no rock-breaking Pinkie then? I finished my cupcake. “Do all your friends live here, Spike?” He shook his head. “Rainbow Dash lives in Cloudsdale.” He pointed a finger towards his left. “Fluttershy lives in a cottage at the edge of the town, but she too left for Manehattan to help Rarity.” I see. It made sense. They may have been able to defeat Nightmare Moon together, but since there were no Elements of Harmony, they had to work with their individual skills this time.
Something in the distance caught my eye. A large, blue tent with a sign displaying a red cross above the entrance. What was it called? A field hospital? What was that thing doing there? I ran towards it. Spike called my name before chasing after me. The windows were covered, making it imposible to see inside. I saw a beautiful nurse with blue eyes and her pink hair tied into a bun. Nurse Redheart? She had a file pad and was taking notes with a look of tiredness on her face. I approached her. “Excuse me, nurse?” She looked up and blinked. “Oh, you’re that human, aren’t you?” Spike came running, took a breath and said. “Yes he is!” I nodded and asked. “Did something happen here?” Nurse Redheart seemed to ponder for a moment before lifting up the covers of the window to let me take a look.
The tent was filled with people of all ages, but mostly elders and children. Several of them were resting on beds, a few even with IV injections on their arms. Nurse Redheart explained. “We set up this hospital here to better perform check-ups and treat those suffering from exhaustion.” She commented grimly. “We Equestrians are a hardy race, but I fear that, had you arrived a week later, things would have been much, much worse.” She did not need to elaborate. I felt a chill going down my spine. Nurse Redheart smiled softly. “So, in behalf of these people, I thank you for your help.” I nodded solemnly. “You’re welcome.”
The remaining of the tour was quite silent. Spike asked with concern. “You’re not upset, are you?” He added. “It wasn’t your fault, you know.” I sighed. “Yeah.” I know it wasn’t my fault, I did my best and we should look at the bright side and blah, blah, blah. But guess what? I was upset. The smiling faces of Mr. and Mrs. Cake kept flashing in my mind. The duel with Applejack was too close. What would have happened if I lost? Would they have worked until they bodies collapsed? Would Applejack spend the rest of her life as a brainwashed slave driver or she would wake up to find the whole town dead at her hands? What about Twilight and Spike? The Cutie Mark Crusaders? Granny Smith? Big Mac? Everybody? I gritted my teeth. All those lives in my hands, all that responsibility on my back and I staggered.
The sun was already setting when we arrived to the Golden Oak Library. The light bathed the giant tree, giving the impression it was genuinely made of gold. Spike asked meekly. “Looks better here than on the middle of a dark forest, doesn’t it?” I smiled fondly. If I had to choose between the Golden Oak Library and the Friendship Castle, I would pick the former every time. “Much better.”
We made our way inside, where we found Twilight surrounded by floating scrolls and maps. Owlowiscious was perched atop the stairs, from where he greeted us with a loud hoot. With a single gesture, Twilight neatly put her reading material back in place and greeted. “Welcome back.” She smiled expectantly. “So? What did you think of Ponyville, Joe?” I paused for a moment and said. “It’s everything you said, Twilight, and much more.” She smiled in delight. “Great!”
I asked expectantly. “What’ll be our next move?” Twilight adjusted her glasses. Her expression turned serious. “I’ve spoke with Applejack and we decided we won’t achieve anything if we stay here.” Does that mean what I think? She continued. “We are going to leave Ponyville, find our friends and face this threat together.” Awesome. I nodded with a smile. Twilight sighed. “Joe, I want you to know things will get more difficult from now on. That Game of Darkness you experienced? It will most likely happen again.” She looked right into my eyes. “I can send you back to the Earth if you want.” I blinked. “Don’t get me wrong; even if you decide to leave, Ponyville, all of us will be eternally grateful for what you did here.” She gave me a small smile. “I’m not even going to ask you to leave your cards with us.”
Here we are again, huh? I chuckled and shook my head. “After today, I have no doubt I want to stay here until the very end.” I drew the first card of my deck without looking and lifted it for them to see. “Even if it’s only by playing this game, I will do my best for the sake of this world.” Whew. I think that came out pretty good. Owlowiscious gave me a hoot of approval. Spike cheered. “Oh yeah!” He patted me on the back. Ouch! Twilight took off her glasses, stepped forward and hugged me. Whoa. She stepped back, smiled tenderly and said. “Thank you, Joe.” I swear if she does that again my heart is going jump out of my mouth. I nodded. “I-It’s nothing…” I glanced at the card I drew. Blue-Eyes White Dragon, eh? I swear I will not stagger ever again.
That night I was sitting on my bed, surrounded by my cards and with the light of a single bulb on the ceiling as my only company. I have to say the little old lady that sold me the deck made a superb job getting nearly every single card Seto Kaiba had used. Unfortunately, this had the downside of adding up to a grand total of sixty cards. Not exactly the best number in a game where the minimum number for a deck is forty. I picked up my Vampire Lord; it seemed another card had gotten stuck to it. I peeled them carefully. Giant God Soldier Obelisk ? Interesting. I bet I could build something decent with this.
A sudden knock on the door got my attention. “Joe? Are you awake?” Applejack? I replied. “Yes.” She asked. “Can I borrow your shampoo? Applebloom emptied mine and hers.” I swiftly grabbed the bottle of shampoo from the bathroom, opened the door and said. “Here you go.” Now, if we were to get a lesson from this, it would be make sure to check you have everything you need before stepping into the shower. Applejack obviously didn’t, since she was wearing nothing beyond a white towel. Her left arm was firmly pressed over her breasts while holding the knot of her towel. She took the bottle with her right hand and said. “Thanks, partner!” She was soaking wet. The water droplets glistened over her tanned skin and her long blonde hair sprawled wildly over her back, shoulders and forehead. All in all, she looked like a water nymph from the Greek myths.
I recovered from my daze quick enough to lean forward and peek as she jogged down the hallway. The towel was a bit short and, as a result, I could see the lower half of her ass cheeks, swaying rhythmically as she went inside her room. I closed the door and looked at the pile of cards on my bed. Yep. I was definitely going to build something good. But first, I went inside the bathroom and locked the door.
The train station was particularly small and rustic, even for a town like Ponyville. It was located a five minute walk distance of the Golden Oak Library. Twilight looked at me and assured. “The train will be here soon.” I smiled. She explained. “From here it will take us about six hours to reach Manehattan.” I nodded. Twilight was full on “Hogwarts mode” once again, complete with coat, glasses and bike shorts below her skirt that went down slightly above her knees. I glanced at Applejack, talking animatedly with Spike; she had switched her tight, white sleeveless shirt for an orange lumberjack one with the sleeves rolled up her elbows. I chuckled. I didn’t know if I should be sad or thankful for this fashion change.
As we waited patiently under the pleasant morning sun, I saw a mixed-breed, black dog approaching the station. It reminded me of Winona, the first time I saw her; scruffy and exhausted looking. I muttered. “Poor thing.” Twilight tilted her head and her eyes widened in recognition. She called immediately. “Applejack!” I looked between the two of them, unable to comprehend what was going on. Applejack swiftly approached the dog, holding it carefully between her arms. “What the hay are you doing here, Albus ?” I quirked an eyebrow puzzled. Albus? She called. “Spike!” He did not even need to be told what to do and took a canteen from his backpack, which he handled to her. Appejack poured the water on her palms, from where Albus drank enthusiastically and happily wagging his tail.
I turned to Twilight. “What’s going on?” She explained. “That’s Applejack’s cousin’s dog.” Cousin? Which one of them? She continued. “Braeburn from the town of Appleloosa.” Really? I didn’t know he had a dog. I frowned and commented tentatively. “I have a feeling that’s not exactly near here.” Twilight nodded. “Something’s wrong.” She shared a look with Applejack. No words were necessary; it was obvious Manehattan would have to wait.
Let’s see, we’ve got plenty of rocks, lots of cacti, some tumbleweed and sand as far as you can see. Yep. Apparently deserts remain pretty much the same no matter how magical your world is. I turned my attention to the inside of the train. Albus had fallen asleep on Applejack’s lap. She caressed the pup’s head softly with her right hand while tightly clenching the left one. I gulped; first her family and town, and now her cousin. It wouldn’t surprise me if she took it personally. Spike shuffled his deck absentmindedly while Twilight had both arms crossed over her chest, looking at nothing in particular. She suddenly broke the silence. “We should keep our Duel Disks ready; we don’t know what to expect.” I nodded. You don’t have to tell me twice. I doubt there’s much I could help with beyond playing card games. I turned to look out of the window again and something caught my eye. “Bisons!”
Twilight smiled. “They live around this area. I believe the species exist in the Earth too.” I nodded and asked. “Do they talk?” She quirked an eyebrow puzzled. “I’m sorry?” I pointed a finger towards the window. “The bisons; do they, you know, talk? Like us?” Twilight tilted her head and said. “Uh…no.” Applejack snickered. “How are bisons goin’ to talk?” I replied sheepishly. “Oh, you know…I just thought that since magic exists in this world and…nevermind.” Twilight, Spike and Applejack shared a laugh. Another difference between the show and this world to add to the list, I guess. I smiled. Maybe I should start keeping a “broken grim silence” count too.
Deja vu: the feeling that you are doing something that you've done before. That sounds about right. Appleloosa was small, colorful and, just like Ponyville back then, nearly deserted. The silence was unsettling. We approached carefully, avoiding the main path, while following the lead of Albus. I could see the apple orchards in the distance. Behind a small barn we found a young man, with tanned skin, orange hair and emerald green eyes, moving a bale of hay. He wore brown boots, blue jeans and a yellow, sleeveless shirt with a sleeveless, leather brown jacket over it. He took off his high-crowned, wide-brimmed brown hat and wiped the sweat from his forehead. Albus’ bark got his attention. He looked up and, before he could even say a word, got jumped on by the pup. He held his dog, which affectionately licked his face, and said. “Albus! You rascal! Where have you been?”
Applejack called. “Braeburn!” He smiled widely with a mixture of happiness and relief. “Cousin Applejack! You have no idea how good is to see you!” She grinned. “Ah’ suspected somethin’ was afoul when you sent your pup to Ponyville alone.” Braeburn put Albus back on the ground and patted his head affectionately. He admitted. “Nah, he did that on his own.” Albus barked. Braeburn said. “Thanks, partner.” Applejack nodded. She pointed at us. “You remember Twilight Sparkle and Spike, right?” Braeburn smiled. “Sure do!” She then pointed at me. “This fella here is mah’ friend Joe.” Braeburn swiftly took my hand and shook it vigorously. “Howdy, Joe!” He said enthusiastically. “Welcome to A-A-A-ppleloosa!” He took a breath. “Sorry, ah’ haven’t had much time to rest lately.” I smiled sympathetically. “Thanks, Braeburn.”
Twilight said. “Can you tell us what happened here, Braeburn?” Applejack added. “Ah’ second that.” Braeburn sighed. “A couple of days ago, this bunch of rotten, no-good-doers took over our town.” We looked at each other in disbelief. Braeburn continued. “They had fancy Duel Disks just like yours and started callin’ these horrible critters to fight. We tried to duel them and everythin’ but…” he cringed. “It hurt for real.” Twilight, Spike and I shared a look. Could it be a Game of Darkness? Braeburn finished. “They call themselves the Cattle Rustlers gang.” I blinked; the bulls from “The Good, the Bad and the Ponies”? Applejack did not waste any time. She said fiercely. “Just tell us where they are and we’ll kick ‘em so hard they’ll have to look up to look down.” Braeburn nodded.
Making sure to avoid the main path, we reached the edge of the apple orchards, staying hidden behind a nearby cart. I frowned. No wonder the town was so deserted; most of the inhabitants seemed to be working here, harvesting apples, filling barrels and--wait a minute. I pointed in bewilderment. “Those are horses.” Braeburn nodded. “Yep!” I added. “You have horses pulling your carts.” He looked around him awkwardly, like if he had been accused of commiting a felony, and replied. “Uh…yes?” Twilight quirked an eyebrow puzzled. “I remember reading about this species having been domesticated by humans since older times.” I said. “Uh, yes, I mean, that’s true, but I didn’t think I would see them here.” Braeburn blinked twice. “Why’s that?” Applejack rolled her eyes. “Don’t mind him, Braeburn.” She added. “Joe is being silly today.” Oh, give me a break. And I’m not he one sharing my name with a pony who had a song about how silly she was.
Braeburn pointed towards a couple of burly guys resting under the shade of a tree. “There.” They both wore black boots and blue jeans. One of them had a red shirt, the other a grey one. Both had an activated Duel Disk around their left arm, with a single card on the monster zone each. While they lay comfortably, two large beast men wielding wooden clubs kept a close eye on the workers. I muttered. “Barbarian #1 and #2 .” Braeburn explained. “The darker skinned one is Buffalo Bull, and the one with the top black hat and moustache is Angus McSteer.” He gritted his teeth. “They take turns keeping an eye on us while their boss, King Longhorn, spends his time on the Salt Block livin’ the big life at our expense.” Applejack stomped her foot. She declared. “That’s all ah’ need to know!” Twilight suggested. “We need a plan.” Applejack adjusted her Duel Disk on her left arm. “Ah’ got yer plan right here, Twilight.” She called. “Come with me, Spike!” He jumped in surprise, but quickly put down his backpack and adjusted his Duel Disk around his right arm. As we watched them march forward, Braeburn asked hesitantly. “Will they be okay?” Twilight smiled confidently. “Don’t worry.” I leaned over the cart to watch more comfortably. It was time to see what those two were really capable of.
Applejack yelled. “Get up, you dirtbags, so we can knock you back down!” Spike nodded. “What she said!” Both, Buffalo Bull and Angus McSteer, looked at each other with a smirk and calmly stood up. Damn it, those guys were huge! If I didn’t knew better, I could’ve sworn they were professional powerlifters. Hell, even Big Mac looked unassuming next to them. The Barbarians disappeared as they took the cards from the disks and re-shuffled their decks. Evidently this was not the first time they dealt with people standing up to them. Several of the townspeople stopped working to watch with trepidation on their faces. Applejack instructed. “You take Mr. Moustache.” Spike nodded.
The four of them stood at the ready; their life points flashed above them at 4000 each. They declared simultaneously. “Duel!” Angust McSteer took the first turn, drawing his initial hand plus one and summoning a large, humanoid steer with prominent tusks. Between its constant snarling and reddish skin, it gave the impression its whole body was scalding to the touch. “Great Angus !” I snorted. Talk about appropiate. He set a card and finished his turn.
Spike grinned and drew his six cards energetically. “I summon Troop Dragon !” A bipedal, green winged dragon materialized in front of Spike. It wore leather armor and held a sharp looking spear in its claws. “You think you’re hot stuff? Take this, Fire Dragon's Blazing Bullet !” The dragon took a deep breath and spit a fireball that incinerated the Great Angus, followed by a direct attack that took Angust McSteer’s life points down to 3300. Spike pointed a finger and declared. “You turn!” Not bad. He managed to drew first blood and set up a defense with just a two card combo.
Applejack ripped the six cards from the top of her deck and did not waste any time declaring her first move. “Amazoness Village !” Several wooden huts emerged from the ground around her. She continued by setting two cards and summoning Amazoness Fighting Warrior . The musclebound amazon clashed her fists together as her attack points went up by 200. Applejack declared. “Turn end!” A monster that protected her from battle damage, a field that ensured a replacement in case said monster was destroyed and two set cards. This Applejack was not like the one I faced before.
Buffalo Bull chuckled as he drew six cards and immediately played Legendary Capital Atlantis . Applejack grumbled as the Amazoness Village was washed away by a large wave. Thanks to the effect of his field spell, Buffalo Bull could summon Genocide King Salmon without a tribute. The giant, demonic-looking fish jumped out of the water, its attack points going up to 2600, before returning to the murky depths. Buffalo Bull ordered the attack of his monster. The Genocide King Salmon jumped out once more, catching the Amazoness Fighting Warrior’s body with its oversized jaws and dragging her down. I gulped as the water turned red. Buffalo Bull declared the end of his turn with a sneer.
Angust McSteer cracked his neck, drew a card and activated Premature Burial from his hand. His life points went down by 800, to 2500, and Great Angus was back on his side of the field. He normal summoned a second copy of Great Angus. Spike took a couple of breaths and braced himself for the onslaught. The first Great Angus broke the neck of Spike’s Troop Dragon with a single, brutal backhand. Spike gritted his teeth in pain, his life points having gone down to 2900, but quickly replaced it with a second copy in defense position. Angust McSteer declared a second attack, forcing Spike to bring his third and last Troop Dragon to the field. Suddenly, the two beasts were engulfed by a pyre that went taller than the surrounding apple tres. The flames flickered and swirled, slowly but surely taking the shape of a humanoid. Angust McSteer called the monster’s name. “Devil of Menacing Incandescence !” He activated his face-down card, Kickfire , before finishing his turn.
No wonder the townspeople did not want to face these guys; they weren’t half bad and had a knack for causing damage. Applejack drew a card and activated her set Amazoness Willpower to bring back her Amazoness Fighting Warrior. “Ah’ summon Amazoness Holy Warrior !” Despite not having a physique as impressive as her comrade, the long-haired, blonde amazon exhuded an impressive aura of strenght. Her attack points went up to 1900. Applejack activated Amazoness Fighting Spirit from her hand and declared the attack of her Holy Warrior. “Slice it!” The Genocide King Salmon jumped to intercept the attack and was swiftly cut in two. Buffalo Bull growled as his life points went down by 300. Applejack activated her second set card. “Queen's Selection !” Amazoness Trainee materialized from her deck. What the young girl lacked in stature and musculature, she compensated with ferocity. Both, her and the Amazoness Fighting Warrior, charged at Buffalo Bull from the sides and stroke his midsection with a kick and a punch respectively; lowering his life points to a mere 700 and making him double over in pain. Applejack set the last card in her hand and taunted. “Feelin’ like givin’ up yet?”
Buffalo Bull roared. “Draw!” His anger turned into joy when he saw his newest card. “Lightning Vortex!” He discarded a card to pay the cost. Applejack shielded her eyes as several lightning bolts fell over the field, vaporizing all of her monsters. Buffalo Bull summoned a second Genocide King Salmon. “Kill her!” The demonic fish jumped on Applejack, but much to our surprise, she merely took a step aside and avoided the attack. The water at her feet turned blood red and Buffalo Bill’s life points went down to zero. He yelled in disbelief. “What was that?” Applejack pointed a thumb towards her open Skewer Pitfall and said. “You shoulda watch your step.” Buffalo Bull roared, threw his Duel Disk aside and charged like an angry bull. I couldn’t believe how fast it happened. Applejack turned around, glared over her shoulder and launched a straight back kick, hitting Buffalo Bull on the stomach with her heel. His body bounced back like if he had crashed with a steel beam. He let out a barely audible squeak and fell face first on the ground, unconscious.
The townspeople murmured among themselves in amazement. Braeburn whistled. “That’s mah’ cousin!” I glanced at Twilight, who had her attention focused on Spike. He drew a card and Angust McSteer immediately sent Kickfire to the graveyard to inflict 2000 points of damage to him. Twilight gasped as the flames rolled over Spike; his legs wobbled, but he did not fall. Spike coughed and said. “You’re going to need more than that to burn me.” He looked at his newest card and his lower lip curled in disappointment. Was it a bad draw? He sighed. “I was hoping to finish this with one of my own.” He shrugged, switched Troop Dragon to attack position and activated Forced Transition . Angust McSteer’s eyes widened in shock as Spike’s Troop Dragon and his Devil of Menacing Incandescence switched control. Spike summoned Spear Dragon and casually ordered the attack of both of his monsters, taking down his opponent’s life points down to zero. He pumped his fist. “Oh yeah!”
Still, it seemed that foul play was something all the Cattle Rustlers adhered too, as Spike soon found himself about to be pummeled by a very angry bandit. Before I could shout a warning, Twilight had already teleported between Spike and Angust McSteer, stopping the later’s fist with just the tip of her left index finger, glowing with an intense purple light. I watched astonished as Twilight pressed her glowing right palm on the bandit’s chest and sent his body flying like a ragdoll against a tree. Satisfied, she dusted her hands and asked. “Are you okay, Spike?” He nodded rapidly. “Uh-huh!” I made a mental note of not making these girls angry.
The crowd of townsponies exploded in a chorus of cheers and whistles. Applejack raised a hand and said. “Alright, everybody, let’s rope up these two and get your town back!” You know, as wrong as it sounds, I never imagined marching into town with a mob while carrying two tied up, and unconscious dudes on a cart could be so exciting. We reached the Salt Block in no time. Applejack asked. “Is this the place?” Braeburn nodded. “Eeyup!” She cracked her knuckles. Twilight interjected. “Wait a minute.” She turned to Braeburn. “Are there other people inside?” He exchanged a few words with two fellows and nodded. “There’s Sheriff Silverstar and the people handlin’ the Salt Block.” Twilight turned to Applejack. “They may try to hurt them if we just barge in.” Applejack scratched her chin. “Ah’ reckon’ you got a point there.” After a moment of silence, Spike raised his hand. “What if I get in there and make them chase me outside?” Twilight bit her lower lip in concern. “I don’t know, Spike. That sounds too dangerous.” Spike crossed both arms over his chest and pouted.
I asked. “How about I go?” They turned to look at me. I explained myself. “I’m not from around here and I bet I would draw much less attention than two pretty girls or a kid.” Spike narrowed his eyes. He said drily. “Ten years-old.” I apologized. Applejack asked. “Are you sure ‘bout that, Joe?” I nodded. It was time for me to do something. Twilight put a hand over my shoulder and said. “Don’t hesitate to call if things get ugly.” I nodded. “Thank you, guys.”
The smell of tobacco assaulted my nostrils as soon as I stepped inside. The whole place was nice, if a bit humble, but the cloud of smoke and the lack of patrons made it difficult to appreciate. A young man played music on a piano with a look of absolute exhaustion and boredom on his face. I caught the immediate attention of the barman and a couple of waitresses, but they did not say a word and hurriedly returned to their cleaning duties. Then I saw them. Three men as burly as the ones we met previously, sitting comfortably around a small, round table; playing cards, smoking and drinking. Two of them were dressed casually, with brown boots, jeans and black shirts. One had a handkerchief around his neck; the other had it covering the lower half of his face. But the one who caught my attention was the man sitting on the middle of those two. Unlike his comrades, he wore a fine-looking gray suit, black polished shoes and a high-crowned, wide-brimmed hat of the same color. Between his long, black sideburns and prominent jaw he reminded me of a gorilla. King Longhorn, undoubtely. He glanced at his mug and said loudly. “Oh dear, it seems my mug is empty.” Another man approached. He had short brown hair, blue eyes and a nice moustache. He wore the same boots, jeans and shirt as seemingly everybody around here, with a sleeveless blue jacket on top. Despite the frilly pink apron I suspected he was forced to wear, he still carried himself with dignity while refilling King Longhorn’s mug. “Thank you, Sheriff Silverstar.” King Longhorn added with a condescending smile. “You’re as attentive as always.” Sheriff Silverstar’s nose flared, but he retreated without saying a word.
I felt like the protagonist in one of those old western movies. I cleared my throat. “Good day, gentlemen.” What was that saying? If you’re going to challenge a man to a card game it costs nothing to be polite? The three of them turned to look at me. King Longhorn quirked a bemused eyebrown. “Can we help you, Mister?” I smiled. “Joe. I’m a traveling duelist and a gambler.” The last word seemed to pique his interest. He tilted his head. “A pleasure to meet you, Joe. I am King Longhorn.” He waved his hand towards his companions. “These are my associates.” The man with the handkerchief around his neck nodded. “Jersey Shore.” The one with the handkerchief covering the lower half of his face looked me up and down. “Doc Holstein.” I nodded. King Longhorn leaned forward with both arms over the table. “What brings a traveling duelist and gambler to Longhorn Town?” Humble. “I heard there were some very skilled players on this town and, in my experience, where there are good players, there are rare cards.” I took my Blue-Eyes White Dragon from my deck and showed it to them. “Do you fancy a little gamble, gentlemen?”
King Longhorn’s eyes gleamed with greed. He stood, picked up a Duel Disk from a nearby table and adjusted it around his left arm. He waved his hand. “After you.” In hindsight, turning my back to a bunch of bandits wasn’t probably my best decision, as I quickly found myself being picked from the neck of my shirt and held like up like a misbehaving puppy. King Longhorn walked in front of me with a smug smile across his face. “I have an idea to make this game more interesting.” He patted my Duel Disk. “You give me all of your rare cards to upgrade my deck before we play. What do you say?” They way he looked at me made it obvious the only difference between answering “yes” or “no” was the amount of teeth I would be keeping in my mouth. I took a breath, put two fingers on my mouth and whistled as loud as I could. My whole world suddenly turned white. The wooden ceiling was replaced by a cerulean sky and I screamed as I fell, only to be caught by a pair of strong arms. “Nice of you to drop by, Joe.” I felt my cheeks heating up. “Thank you, Applejack.” I asked meekly. “Can you please put me down now?” She chuckled and complied. And that’s the story of my first teleportation experience.
In the blink of an eye, the whole town had got the Cattle Rustlers surrounded. Twilight held Jersey Shore and Doc Holstein down with her magic while the townspeople firmly tied them up. Now only King Longhorn remained. He looked around him in shock, like a mouse trying to find an escape route. Sheriff Silverstar came out of the Salt Block, ripped his apron and declared fiercely. “King Longhorn, you’re under arrest for assaultin’ the townspeople of Appleloosa, vandalizin’ their property and smokin’ on a non-smokin’ establishment!”
The crowd cheered loudly. King Longhorn gritted his teeth. He stood tall and growled. “Really now?” He activated his Duel Disk. “And who among you, yellow-bellied chickens, will have the guts to put me in a cell?” My legs practically moved by themselves. I declared. “I’ll be your opponent.” Twilight asked with concern. “Are you sure, Joe? This is going to be a Game of Darkness.” I nodded. Have you ever had one of those days were everything goes your way and you feel like you could take on the whole world? It was just like that. I lifted my left arm and activated my Duel Disk dramatically. King Longhorn snorted. I smiled and said. “I have an idea to make this game more interesting.” He frowned. “If you win, you and your associates are free to go.” Braeburn turned to Applejack. “Is your friend bein’ silly again?” She chuckled. “Nope.”
King Longhorn laughed. “Aren’t you a confident one?” He smiled sinisterly. “I will break you.” I scoffed. “Let your cards do the talking.” King Longhorn’s nose flared. Hey now, he didn’t laugh at my line. Cool. Our life points appeared above us at 4000 for each. “Draw!” I drew six cards and summoned a favorite of Seto Kaiba. “Blood Vorse !” I set a card. “Turn end!”
“Draw.” King Longhorn calmly drew six cards and summoned Beast Striker . A yeti-like monster wielding a large metal hammer appeared on the field. That’s it. I declared the activation of my set card. “Clone Reproduction !” A copy of Beast Striker appeared on my side of the field in attack position. King Longhorn did not seem impressed. He discarded a card to activate the effect of Beast Striker and summon Moja from his deck. A small, black furry critter with big, round eyes appeared drawing a few snickers from the crowd. Damn it. As much as I hated to admit it, there were a lot of cards with effects I simply did not remember.
King Longhorn replaced the Moja card on his disk with one from his graveyard. The furry critter let out a cry and doubled over like if it had a tummy ache. Several more people in the crowd laughed, until its body started to grow; bigger and bigger until it became as tall as Appleloosa’s clock tower. A mountain of long, black fur with four skeletal limbs sprouting from the base of its body. The monster’s face twisted into a horrifying skull-like shape with glowing red eyes. King Longhorn called the monster’s name loudly. “King of the Beasts !” He seemed to be enjoying the shock and fear his creature caused in the people around us. He played Poison Fangs and commanded. “Crush him.” The King of the Beasts lifted one of its limbs and stepped on my Blood Vorse like a cockroach, my life points going down by 1100. I gritted my teeth. The damn thing hit like a truck. I think. I mean, I’ve never been hit by a truck. King Longhorn set two cards and finished his turn.
I drew a card and played Silent Dead to bring my Blood Vorse back in defense position. “I sacrifice my two monsters!” I held the card upwards before placing it on my disk. “Shine! Blue-Eyes White Dragon!” My monster appeared with a roar that shook the Salt Block’s windows and kicked up a gust of wind that lifted Twilight’s skirt. Those damned bike shorts. The crowd stood in awe at the sight of my dragon. Yeah, I don’t think I have a deep, ancient connection with the Blue-Eyes like Seto Kaiba did, but I’m not going to get tired of summoning it anytime soon either. I pointed a finger. “Blue-Eyes! Your target is Beast Striker! Burst stream!” King Longhorn laughed. Well, shit. His Beast Striker snarled like a rabid monkey, its attack points going up to 3100 and, with a mighty swing of his hammer, struck down the Blue-Eyes. My dragon let out a pitiful growl and fell with its tongue hanging down from the side of its jaw. I felt the pain all over my body, like a fever that makes every single one of your muscles ache. Damn it! Spike is a kid and he took it like a man! I growled under my breath. Do you want to make them worry? Scream your name in fear? I stood firm. My life points had gone down to 1700. Turns out King Longhorn had activated Berserking and Howl of the Wild . With that combination he could break my defenses and inflict damage simultaneously. I set a card. “Turn end.”
King Longhorn calmly drew a card. He said loudly. “I hope you don’t forget about our agreement! Once I win, me and my boys are free to go!” Hmm. What would Kaiba say? I know. “Of course I haven’t.” I smirked. “In fact, if you win, you can have both, my deck and my life too.” The shocked murmurs of the crowd filled the air. Braeburn turned to Applejack. “How ‘bout now?” She did not reply. King Longhorn laughed. “You really want to get out of this hole by digging, don’t you?” I chuckled. “What hole are you talking about? I can bet anything I want because my victory was assured the very moment I drew my first card!” Spike cheered. “You tell him, Joe!” His words were like a spark igniting a fire and soon the whole crowd was cheering and calling my name. Aw shucks. Applejack smiled at Braeburn. “Told ya.” I glanced at Twilight. She smiled at me, and then turned to watch King Longhorn attentively. His left eye twitched. He snarled. “I will tie you to a horse and drag you all the way around this measly town before hanging you from the clocktower.” Getting more creative, aren’t we? King Longhorn ordered the attack of his King of the Beasts, but I countered by playing Attack Nullification . I could see a throbbing vein on his forehead. He yelled. “Turn end!”
I drew a card, set a monster face-down and another card. “I end my turn.”
“DRAW!” King Longhorn looked at his newest card and laughed victoriously. “Cyclone !” My face-down Curse of Darkness was immediately destroyed. He activated the effect of Berserking, empowering his Beast Striker, before gleefully declaring its attack. “Kill him!” I lifted my hand and called the name of my monster. “Magic Lamp !” King Longhorn stared in shock as his own Beast Striker shattered the skull of his King of the Beasts with a well placed hammer strike. His life points went down to 2150. He glared furiously at me. “DO YOU THINK THIS IS OVER?” He discarded a card to activate the effect of Beast Striker and summon a copy of Moja from his deck, which he immediately sacrificed to bring King of the Beasts back from the grave. “Do you think you can beat this combo? Go ahead and try!”
“Draw!” Funny. The crowd had gone silent in anticipation. I played Pot of Greed. Do I need to say what does it do? It was time for one of my favorite combos. I special summoned La Jinn the Demonic Spirit of the Lamp. “You can only activate the effect of Berserking during my Battle Phase, don’t you?” King Longhorn flared his nose. Figures. I played a card from my hand. “Enemy Controller ! By sacrificing a monster I can take control of one of yours!” My Magic Lamp disappeared and the King of the Beasts was dragged to my side. I said drily. “This is how your combo breaks.” I sacrificed my two monsters. “Once more! Blue-Eyes White Dragon!” My dragon appeared full of pride and shining brightly. I commanded swiftly. “Burst Stream!” My Blue-Eyes reared its head back and breathed a stream of energy that incinerated the Beast Striker, leaving not a single stray hair. My hand was empty. I crossed both arms over my chest. “I end my turn.”
With a trembling hand, King Longhorn drew a card. He stood looking at his only two cards in a stunned silence. I quirked an eyebrow. “You have nothing?” I chuckled. “It’s okay, you can surrender.” Bad choice of words? He crumpled his cards, let out a primal scream and charged at full speed towards me. Guess he’s like a bull deep down. I pointed a finger. “Burst Stream!” My Blue-Eyes’ attack fell on King Longhorn like a pillar of light. Once it dissipated, we saw the bandit leader lay sprawled on the ground, his fine suit looking charred. He coughed and squeaked. “Ouch.” I took a breath. It was over. Braeburn threw his hat into the air. “Yee-Haw!” His fellow Appleloosians followed him in the celebration. I smiled in embarrassment as they flooded me with thanks, praises and congratulations. We bumped fists with Spike. Applejack threw her right arm around my neck and squeezed. “Dagnabbit, Joe! You really know how to put a show!” I laughed meekly. She smelled of apples and freshly cut grass. By the way, Twilight smells of lavender. What? Oh, like you wouldn’t. Speaking about Twilight; I looked around and spotted her kneeling next to King Longhorn.
Twilight said firmly. “I know you can’t use dark magic. So tell me, who gave you this Duel Disk?” King Longhorn mumbled incoherently. She frowned and asked again. He gulped. “P-Princess Celestia.” Twilight narrowed her eyes. “Don’t lie to me.” She pointed her glowing index figer at his face. I felt like she was threatening him with a knife. “It’s true! I-I swear! S-She came to us, gave me the Duel Disk and told me to use its power as much as I wanted!” Sheriff Silverstar quickly intervened. “Whoa there, Missy!” He frowned sternly. “Ah’ don’t like him either, but that’s not how we handle justice here in Appleloosa.” Twilight apologized drily. She stood up and watched in silence as they took King Longhorn away.
I approached her. “Twilight.” I asked tentatively. “I know I haven’t met Princess Celestia, but it is possible that…?” She swiftly cut me off with a glare. “Absolutely not!” I flinched. “S-Sorry.” She took off her glasses and massaged the bridge of her nose. “I’m sorry, Joe. It’s just that…I’m genuinely at a loss here.” I put my hand on her shoulder. “It’s okay. We’ll figure it out.”
We had no choice but to reject Braeburn’s invitation to stay for the rest of the day; it was already past noon by the time we solved the problem with the Cattle Rustlers and we wanted to reach Manehattan as soon as possible. That didn’t meant we had to reject the half a dozen of freshly baked apple pies they offered us as a token of thanks, mind you. And so, we found ourselves back on track and enjoying a small victory feast.
I took a bite of a slice. Amazing. It had the right amount of sweetness and the filling practically melted in your mouth. This certainly explains why Chief Thunderhooves was quicky to put an end to fight between this tribe and the Appleloosians after tasting one, even if it was slammed against his face at full speed.
We touched the subject of our duels. Spike whined about not being able to deal the finishing blow with his prized Red-Eyes Black Dragon. Applejack smiled sympathetically. “I’m no expert, Spike, but when you wanna harvest more apples, you go and plant more trees, if you get what I’m sayin’.” Spike protested. “But Twilight has only one Black Magician in her deck.”
Twilight quirked an eyebrow. She adjusted her glasses and explained in her best teacher tone. “A fact which is balanced by all the drawing, searching and re-arranging effects of the monsters, spells and traps I’ve carefully selected after weeks of research and testing.” She turned her nose up with a proud smile. Applejack chuckled.
Spike rolled his eyes and looked at me. “What about you, Joe? How do you manage to pull your Blue-Eyes White Dragon to deal the finishing blow?” That was a good question, actually. I mean, my Blue-Eyes didn’t help me when I played with the Cutie Mark Crusaders, sure, but in the two occasions where stakes where high, I managed to turn the tables with their aid. Heart of the Cards maybe? I decided to keep it simple. “I’ve got three copies, remember?”
Spike pondered for a moment then looked at Twilight. She frowned. “If you need more money you can look for a job.” Applejack flicked the tip of her hat with her thumb and smiled. She said. “We can always use an extra pair of hands at Sweet Apple Acres.” Heh. I’m definitely keeping that in mind for the next time she decides to fix the sprinklers. Spike pouted. “Come on, Twilight! Can’t you use your special card?”
Twilight’s eyes widened. “Spike! The Royal Treasury is not for buying trading cards.” He crossed both arms over his chest. “Not even when we’re using them to help others?” Twilight froze. Touché, huh? I put my hand over Spike’s shoulder and said. “Remember, Spike, that restriction breeds creativity.” He looked at me. “I could give you all the cards in the world, but if you don’t polish your skills, it would amount to nothing.” Spike curled his lower lip in doubt, but finally admitted. “Yeah, I guess you’re right.” Twilight gave me a thankful smile.
I decided to change the topic, just in case. “Say.” I began casually. “The way you girls took down those bandits was quite impressive.” Applejack crossed her legs, put her hands behind her head and leaned back with a proud grin on his face. “What can ah’ say? Years of applebuckin’.” I looked at Twilight and added. “You looked like you weren’t even trying.” She adjusted her glasses and explained. “Magic manifests differently for each one of us, but always under three categories.” She extended her thumb. “Earth Magic, for increased physical strenght and farming skill.” Her index finger. “Sky Magic, for the ability to fly and control the weather.” Her middle finger. “And Mind Magic, for specialized spells, enchantments and matter manipulation.” I nodded attentively. “As is the case with Applejack and her years of applebucking, our magical proficiency can be increased with training and studying.” I smiled. I wonder if they have a means to measure their magic. Spike, what does the scouter say about her power level? Heh. “Moreover, our magic is also influenced by our special talents.”
I interjected. “The ones indicated by your Cutie Marks, right?” Twilight nodded aprovingly. I thought about my first encounter with the Cutie Mark Crusaders. Would Twilight and Applejack show me her Cutie Marks if I asked? Yeah, I don’t think I’m going to try that anytime soon. “For example, Applejack’s special talent improves her harvesting skills when it comes to apples.” Applejack pointed her finger at me. “And that’s why you ain’t goin’ to find better ones in all of Equestria than those of Sweet Apple Acres.” I smiled at her declaration. “And what about yours, Twilight?” She answered. “My special talent is magic.” Spike muttered. “I thought it was giving lectures.” Twilight shot him an unamused glare. I quickly asked. “What kind of magic?” She gave me an amusingly cocky smile. “All kinds of magic.” I quirked an eyebrow. “Oh? Does that mean there’s not limit to what you can do?” Twilight looked away flustered. “Maybe, I mean, talent helps, but it’s no substitute for hard work.”
A thought suddenly came to my mind. “Don’t you have some kind of term to distinguish between each other depending on the magic you have?” You know, like Pegasus and Unicorn? Not that I expected them to use those. Twilight cleared her throat and began. “Long ago, before the rule of the Princesses, Equestrians were divided in three factions and engaged in a constant struggle for power.” I nodded. That sounded like Heartwarming’s Eve. She continued. “Each side would use their magic to try to gain advantage over the others; be it controlling the weather, raising the sun and the moon or tending to crops.” Right. This was the part where the Windigos come in, wasn’t it? “The tensions kept escalating until war became inevitable.” I gulped. I have to stop trying to second-guess these history lessons. “It was at this point, the darkest one in the history of our world, that Celestia and Luna descended.”
I found myself picturing two radiant winged figures appearing over a battlefield, heralded by a chorus of trumpets, and announcing themselves by declaring “fear not” in a voice that shook the earth and the sky. “Wielding the magic of the three factions, the Princesses swiftly put an end to the conflict and brought everybody together under their rule.” Twilight finished. “Ever since then, we all refer to each other as Equestrians, regardless of the nature of our magic.”
Fascinating. I smiled. “Seems the Princesses have done a lot of good for this world.” Applejack nodded. “Eeyup! Princess Celestia gave the Apple Family a piece of land for our orchard.” Spike added enthusiastically. “It’s thanks to her that I met Twilight!” Twilight smiled nostalgically. “Princess Celestia was the one who invited me to her School for Gifted Wizards and made me her personal student.” She added firmly. “And Princess Luna works hard every day, protecting our rest and dreams, to atone for her past deeds.” Twilight looked at me directly into the eyes. “Do you understand, Joe? We wouldn’t be here if it weren’t for them." I nodded solemnly. No wonder she got so angry at King Longhorn’s words.
A loud thumping noise coming from the roof of the car got our attention. We listened attentively for a moment. Nothing. I shrugged. “A bird?” Just as we were ready to dismiss the whole thing, there was a second noise coming from the door. I asked. “Doesn’t that door lead outside?” Both, Twilight and Applejack, quickly stepped into the hallway, facing towards the door with Spike behind them. I readied my Duel Disk. You know, I hope nobody ever asks us about our combat roles. I mean, Twilight’s the wizard, Applejack the brawler and Spike the child with untapped potential. Me? I play a freaking card game.
We tensed as the doorknob twisted. Finally, the door burst open and a dark figure came inside the passenger car shouting. “Oh yeah!” Kool Aid Man? No! My eyes widened in shock. That long, messy rainbow colored hair sprawled over her shoulders and forehead; Rainbow Dash! She was a head shorter than me and wore a worn out, dark blue flight suit with black combat boots and fingerless gloves of the same color. The suit had a symbol of a lightning bolt on each shoulder.
I watched with a wide smile as Twilight, Applejack and Spike welcomed her with hugs. Rainbow Dash returned the gesture, albeit breaking it off a bit too quickly if you ask me. Applejack asked cheerfully. “What are you doin’ here, Rainbow?” Rainbow Dash grinned. She replied sarcastically. “Oh, I don’t know! How about looking for you, guys?” Spike said excitedly. “We were looking for you too!” Twilight smiled widely. “This is amazing! I was afraid we would have to travel for days to find you, but you got to us first!” She asked. “What’s the situation in the north?” Rainbow Dash chuckled. “Can I take a seat first?” Twilight squeaked in embarrasment and pointed to the seats we were using.
Rainbow Dash stopped walking and looked at me up and down with her brown colored eyes. I smiled and extended my right hand. “Hi.” Spike quickly introduced me. “This is Joe. He’s a human from the Earth!” She nodded and patted me dimissively on the shoulder. “Cool.” Wow. That was cold. Not even cool, just plain cold. I decided to make nothing out of it. Rainbow Dash sat down with a sigh of relief. Applejack took the space next to her while Twilight, Spike and I sat in front of them, with him on the middle. Rainbow Dash declined Applejack’s offer of a slice of pie and began talking unprompted. “So yeah.” She cleared her throat. “About the mess up there, we’ve reached kind of a stalemate.”
Twilight blinked puzzled. “A stalemate?” Rainbow Dash nodded quickly. “Yep. The ground troops are not moving an inch and us in the air just go around doing recoinnassance stuff.” She shrugged. “Sometimes there’s a fight between summoned monsters, but that’s it.” Twilight rubbed her chin thoughtfully. “Weird.” She elaborated. “King Sombra’s approach had been very aggressive so far, why would he decide to slow down right now?” Rainbow Dash poined her finger enthusiastically. “That’s what I’ve been thinking about!” She leaned forward in a conspiratorial manner. “What if—get this—King Sombra is not interested in the rest of Equestria?” I frowned.
Twilight, Applejack and Spike looked at Rainbow Dash like if she had declared she could make smoothies with mud and rocks as ingredients. Applejack asked in bewilderment. “What the hay are you talkin’ about, Rainbow?” Rainbow Dash waved her hand dimissively. “I know it sounds crazy, but hear me here, okay? We were the ones who attacked him first!” Applejack shook her head exasperated. “And?” Rainbow Dash rolled her eyes. “And maybe he will stop fighting if we do the same!” Spike scratched his head in confusion. He asked. “You’re saying that we should let him be?” Rainbow Dash nodded quickly. “Exactly! We forget about this war, get everybody home and build a wall or something to keep him out of our turf!”
Applejack’s left eye twitched dangerously. “Ah’ don’t know what kind of air you’ve been breathin’, Rainbow, but let me tell ya somethin’.” She flared her nose. “Just a couple of days ago, all of Ponyville fell under the control of that son of a hydra for two whole weeks!” She raised her index and middle fingers for emphasis. “And if it wasn’t for Joe here, we wouldn’t be telling it!” I gulped in embarrasment. That was a lot of credit to take. Thanks, Applejack. Rainbow Dash cringed, but stood up. Her whole body was trembling. “That only shows I’m right and we won’t gain anything with fighting!” Now it was Applejack’s turn to stand up. She growled. “Don’t tell me to just forgive and forget, Rainbow Dash!” Spike and I glanced at each other in worry. I felt like I was trapped in a small cage with two lioness about to fight with each other.
Fortunately, Twilight stood up between the two of them and said sternly. “That’s enough, you two.” She looked at Rainbow Dash. “I understand your point, Rainbow. But what about the inhabitants of the Crystal Empire?” Rainbow Dash shrugged. “What about them?” Twilight’s mouth fell. She asked indignant. “What do you mean with that? Don’t you care that they are being enslaved?”
Rainbow Dash shouted. “Don’t give me that, Twilight! How many of us know people from there? Not only that, how many of us have even heard about this Crystal Empire before the war?” She shook her head. “You don’t know what it feels like! Living in some camp surrounded by nothing but frost and darkened skies! Waiting for something, anything to happen so you don’t die of boredom and worry for your friends and family!” She pointed her thumb at her chest. “The Crystal Empire can fall into an ice pit for all I care!”
Twilight stood frozen in shock. Spike mouth fell. Applejack gritted her teeth and grabbed Rainbow Dash by the front of her shirt. It all happened in the blink of an eye. Rainbow Dash grabbed Applejack by the front of her shirt, bend down her knees and spun around, performing a shoulder throw that sent the apple farmer flying and crashing into the other side of the hallway like an empty potato sack.
Both, Spike and I, hugged each other in fear. Rainbow Dash sharply turned around and pointed her finger towards Twilight. She growled. “We are all going to get down on the next stop and go back straight to Ponyville!” But before Twilight could respond, Applejack was already back on her feet, holding Rainbow Dash by her shirt once more, and this time with her right fist aiming at Rainbow’s face. Oh shit. Rainbow Dash swiftly caught the punch with her left hand while holding Applejack’s left arm with her right. Both girls remained locked on that position, struggling with such strenght that the metal floor sank under their feet. Thinking quickly, Twilight held them both and, in a purple flash of light, teleported out of the passenger car.
Where did they go? The whole car shook. Spike pointed a finger upwards and declared. “They’re on the roof!” He quickly ran towards the door. Oh God. Don’t tell me she’s being under some kind of mind control too. I looked around and spotted Spike’s Duel Disk on the seat. That gave me an idea. I grabbed the disk and bolted outside. The train was going at full speed through the desert around Appleloosa. I spotted a ladder to my right and, after taking a deep breath to gather courage, I held myself firmly and started going up. The car shook again. I thought about about the Cattle Rustlers and how Applejack and Twilight made short work of them. I felt a chill going down my spine. I reached the top and saw Twilight and Applejack facing Rainbow Dash, who had her wings spread open; beautiful, traslucent blue wings that looked like they were made of ice. She reminded me of a bird of prey trying to intimidate a foe.
A gust of wind hit me in the face, throwing me off balance, but Spike quickly grabbed me by the neck of my coat and helped me to get on the roof. Now, before we continue, let me tell you something. All those movies where you see the guy walking on the roof of a moving train? They’re bullshit. The damn thing moves so fast and vibrates so much that even kneeling makes you feel the slightest breeze will knock you down.
I handed Spike his Duel Disk. “Throw it at Rainbow Dash!” He protested loudly. “Seriously? Do you know how expensive this thing is?” I insisted. “Just do it, please!” Spike bit his lower lip, but did as I asked. The Duel Disk flew like a frisbee towards Rainbow Dash and she easily caught it with her right hand. I shouted. “Rainbow Dash! I challenge you to a Duel!” Twilight and Applejack looked at me in surprise as I crawled my way through the roof of the passenger car. “If you win, we’ll go back to Ponyville!”
Twilight waved her hands in a circle and created a purple, magical field around the cart that greatly lowered the force of the wind. Whew. Applejack lifted me up with ease. “Thanks.” I took a few breaths to recover and said. “I take you haven’t been able to hold much of a conversation.” Applejack looked away. Twilight shook her head. I nodded. “Is she under the influence of dark magic or something?” Rainbow Dash’s face was red and she was breathing heavily. Twilight frowned. “I don’t think so.”
Rainbow Dash glared at me and her wings vanished. She adjusted the Duel Disk around her left arm, took a pile of cards from a pocket on her right leg and placed it on the appropiate slot. No words were necessary. We activated our disks simultaneously and our life points appeared above us at 4000 each.
I drew six cards, summoned X-Head Cannon in attack position and set a card. “Your turn!”
“DRAW!” Rainbow Dash ripped the six cards from the top of her deck and immediately played Fusion to combine Featherman and Burst Lady from her hand. She called the new monster name angrily. “Elemental HERO Flame Wingman !” Flame Wingman soared through the sky, beyond Twilight’s magic field and above the clouds. Rainbow Dash pointed her finger. “Flame Shoot!” At her command, Flame Wingman launched himself down with his body enveloped by flames like a meteor. Shit. I’ve watched enough Yu-Gi-Oh! GX to know where this was going. I braced myself, covering my face with my arms. The onslaught of flames pushed me backwards, but did not hurt. "Fusion Cancel!" My eyes widened in shock as Flame Wingman separated, with Featherman and Burst Lady taking his place, ready to strike. I quickly activated my face-down card. "Holy Elf's Blessing!" The combined attack of the heroes of air and fire took my life points down to a mere 300. I heard Spike exclaimed. “Whoa! That was brutal!” You said it, bud. It was almost a one-turn kill. Phew. I did not see the Elemental Heroes coming, but this fast and aggressive play style was exactly what I would have expected of Rainbow Dash.
Behind me, Twilight gasped. Evidently the fact I was not writhing in pain after the attack was enough to clue her this wasn’t a Game of Darkness. Applejack asked worriedly. “Rainbow, what happened to you? What’s wrong?” Rainbow Dash shook her head. “None of your business!” She looked at me, set a card and said. “Play!”
“Draw!” I nodded in approval. “Y-Dragon Head !” My monster appeared on the field with a mechanical roar. I followed by playing Resurrection of the Dead to bring back X-Head Cannon. Alright. My Y-Dragon Head went in first, vaporizing Burst Lady with an electric beam, while X-Head Cannon blasted Featherman with a shot of its cannons. Rainbow Dash’s life points went down to 2900. She activated her face-down Hero Signal . “Come, Sparkman !” Sparkman emerged from her deck with a crack of thunder. I lifted my right hand and declared. “XY Union!” My Y-Dragon Head equipped itself to my X-Head Cannon, increasing its attack up to 2200. I set a card. “Turn end.”
Rainbow Dash drew a card and activated Miracle Fusion , fusing Featherman and Burst Lady in her graveyard to bring back Flame Wingman, followed by equipping Sparkman with Spark Gun . I frowned. This was her second turn and she had already emptied her hand. What was she in a rush for? Sparkman fired a spark blast at my X-Head Cannon. The mechanical monster screeched as it was forcefully changed to defense position. Rainbow Dash fiercely declared the attack of Flame Wingman. “You’re done for!” Flame Wingman launched a fireball at my monster, but only succeeded at destroying Y-Dragon Head. Rainbow Dash’s eyes widened. I explained. “When a monster equipped with a union monster is destroyed, I get to destroy the union instead.” She gritted her teeth and cursed her forgetfulness. “Spark Flash!” Sparkman destroyed my X-Head Cannon with a single lightning strike. Rainbow Dash grunted and said. “I’m done!”
It was time to end this. “Angel's Charity !” I drew three cards and discarded two. "Pot of Greed!" I drew two cards. I continued by playing Soul Absorption , followed by Soul Release to banish my Resurrection of the Dead, X-Head Cannon, Y-Dragon Head and the discarded Z-Metal Tank from my Graveyard and increase my life points to 2300. “Dimension Fusion !” My life points went down to 300. Rainbow Dash summoned Featherman and Burst Lady in defense position, while I brought my X-Head Cannon, Y-Dragon Head and Z-Metal Tank. I declared loudly. “XYZ Fusion!” My three monsters broke apart and combined spectacularly to form an impressive battle machine. “XYZ-Dragon Cannon !”
I discarded the last card in my hand and my XYZ-Dragon Cannon fired every single one of its barrels, decimating Flame Wingman. “Hyper Destruction!” Sparkman followed suit, lowering Rainbow Dash’s life points to 1700. She growled. “Is that all you have?” I gritted my teeth. Why did it have to be like this? Why I can’t play fun games with the good guys while beating the bad guys to the ground? I pointed at my set card. “Trap card open! Return from the Different Dimension !” My life points went down to 150. The air around me warped as X-Head Cannon, Y-Dragon Head and Z-Metal Tank returned to the field. Rainbow Dash was helpless. My Y-Dragon Head and Z-Metal Tank destroyed her Featherman and Burst Lady, respectively, while my X-Head Cannon attacked directly, pushing her back and lowering her life points to zero. The monsters vanished.
Rainbow Dash fell on her knees and let out a cry of frustration. She slammed both fists on the roof of the car, leaving a dent on the metal. What strenght. Twilight and Applejack quickly approached her, while Spike stood next to me. Twilight asked. “Rainbow, are you okay?” Rainbow Dash was crying. Her sobs were barely audible, but her eyes were swelling with tears. She repeated between hics. “He told me he would give me wings.” I quirked an eyebrow. Doesn’t she already have those? Both, Twilight and Applejack, held her tightly. Applejack said softly. “There, there…”
After a swift teleportation courtesy of Twilight, we were back inside the passenger car. Applejack had taken Rainbow Dash to the toilet to clean herself up; leaving Twilight, Spike and I silently waiting in our seats. I turned to her and asked. “Do you know what Rainbow Dash was talking about back there?” Twilight nodded gloomy. She asked. “Do you remember her sister? Scootaloo?” I nodded. “A girl of her age should be already able to manifest her wings and fly freely.” Should? I asked in shock. “Does that mean she can’t?” Twilight sighed. “Yes and no. She can manifest her wings and, while perfectly functional, they are simply too small to allow her to hover over the ground even.” I covered my mouth with my hand. Unbelievable. I asked if there wasn’t a way to fix that. Twilight curled her lower lip. “It is possible to create wings using magic, but they are quite fragile and would require somebody with advanced magical knowledge to cast and maintain.” She added in defeat. “We were hoping that getting her Cutie Mark would solve the issue, but it wasn’t the case.”
I bit my lower lip and asked tentatively. “Would…one be able to help her with dark magic?” Twilight adjusted her glasses and smiled slightly. Funny. She looked like a teacher dealing with a curious child trying not to offend with his questions. “The thing with dark magic is, Joe, that it’s fueled by negative emotions. Anger, hate, sadness, etc. It will give you power, but eventually consume you, both in mind and body.” I nodded and muttered. “Quicker, easier, more seductive.” Twilight blinked and smiled bemused. “I understood that reference.” Spike lifted a hand and added. “Me too!” I chuckled. Guess Starswirl the Bearded had a lot of stuff on his archives.
Applejack came into the car, followed by Rainbow Dash. She declared cheerfully. “We’re back, everybody!” My jaw fell. Rainbow Dash had ditched her flight suit completely and now sported black tight shorts and a tank top of the same color. She didn’t have much in the breasts department, sure, but her muscles were amazingly defined, like those of an olympic marathoner, and constrasted noticeably with the soft features of her face, creating a beauty that would probably cause more than a single car accident if she went jogging on the street.
Rainbow Dash sat down with a heavy sigh. She looked at us, at the floor, then at us again. She opened her mouth, closed it and gulped. Applejack smiled in amusement. After scratching her head in frustration, she finally blurted. “Im sorry, guys.” Twilight placed her right hand over Rainbow Dash’s shoulder, a gesture Spike imitated, and said. “It’s okay.” I remained silent. I certainly did not feel comfortable attempting a gesture like that myself.
Rainbow Dash smiled, looking like the entire weight of the world had been lifted from her shoulder and said. “Thank you, everybody.” She sighed. “Guess you wanna know what happened back there, huh?” We nodded simultaneously. Rainbow Dash chuckled. “Yeah.” She cleared her throat. “I was doing some scouting when a sudden snowstorm caught me by surprise and forced me to land.” She gritted her teeth. “That’s when I met him.” Spike whispered. “King Sombra?” Rainbow Dash nodded. “I fought him, of course.” She admitted reluctantly. “And he kicked my ass.” She shook her head. “Just when I thought I was done for, he told me he didn’t care about Equestria, only for the Crystal Empire.” Rainbow Dash gulped. “And that if I kept you away from the northern territory, he would leave us alone and…give me wings.”
I bit my thumb. How diabolically cunning. Offering her a great reward for a seemingly small favor that would benefit those close to her too. I frowned. On one hand, I’m sure King Sombra wasn’t this devious in the show or the comics. On the other, this world was so similar yet so different it made me doubt of everything I knew.
Spike exclaimed angrily. “What a slimeball!” Rainbow Dash nodded. She said softly. “He had wings too, you know. Big and scaly.” We looked at her in surprise. “Once he finished talking to me, he spread them and shoot to the sky.” She made an upwards gesture with her hand to emphasize her point. “After that, I came looking around for you.” Nobody spoke for a while. What could we possibly say? Chew her on? How many of us were in a position to do that?
“Hey, Joe!” I snapped of my trance to find Rainbow Dash looking at me with rouguish grin that could have charmed a Buckingham Palace Guard. She chuckled. “Sorry about before, yeah?” I nodded. “N-No problem.” Twilight, Applejack and Spike watched us with amused smiles across their faces. Rainbow Dash extended her right hand towards me. “What do you say we try again?” I smiled and shook her hand. “I’m Rainbow Dash, Wonderbolts reserve, frequent breaker of the sound barrier and all around awesome.” Applejack rolled her eyes and said. “Oh boy, here we go.” Twilight and Spike giggled. I went and asked. “Wonderbolts? Who are they?” Rainbow Dash leaned back on her seat, putting both hands behind her head and spreading her legs comfortably. She said casually. “Oh, just the most elite team of fliers in all of Equestria.” I nodded slowly. “Whoa.” Rainbow Dash chuckled. “I know, I know.” God bless your ego, Rainbow Dash. I have a feeling she wouldn’t have liked to know my awe wasn’t due to her qualifications, but because of her cameltoe, that was acting like an industrial magnet to my eyes.
“Say, Joe!” I shook my head rapidly. I swear I wasn’t fantasizing about burying my face on your crotch! She grinned and asked. “Would you like to see something awesome?” I dunno. How many things would be more awesome than seeing you wearing a tank top and tight shorts? I shrugged and said. “Sure.” Rainbow Dash stood up and walked towards the door leading outside the passenger car; my eyes locking themselves on her perfectly toned ass. My right hand opened and closed by itself. Applejack laughed. “Easy there, partner! It looks like your eyes are ‘bout to pop from your skull!” I felt my face burning. Twilight did not even bother trying to supress her laughing while Spike looked around puzzled. God bless your purity, bud. I desperately tried to change the topic. “W-Where did Rainbow Dash go?” Twilight pointed at the window next to us and said. “Look!”
My eyes widened in awe. Rainbow Dash was out there, running next to our car, kicking up a cloud of dust with each step and leaving rainbow colored trail behind her. I exclaimed. “S-she’s not even flying!” She looked at us and waved casually. Applejack chuckled. “That girl never changes.” She put her hat on the seat and walked towards the door. I glanced her, then at Twilight. “Don’t tell me she’s going to…” Yep. A mere ten seconds later Applejack had caught up with Rainbow Dash. Her stature allowed her to take longer strides and keep up the speed of her friend. I laughed. “This is incredible!” I felt like I was watching a race between the Flash and Superman.
Twilight stood up without a word, took off her glasses and disappeared with a flash, reappearing out there next to Rainbow Dash and Applejack. She wasn’t as fast as them, sure, but every time they left her behind she would teleport ahead.
Spike and I watched transfixed. I asked. “Aren’t you going out there too?” He smiled. “Maybe in a couple of years.” Suddenly, there was a flash of light and the three of them appeared back on the hallway of the passenger car, laughing and panting. Rainbow Dash hugged both, Twilight and Applejack, she muttered. “I missed you, girls.” They returned the gesture and Spike quickly joined them in their group hug. I smiled fondly. Even in this world, their friendship remained as strong as ever.
Rainbow Dash had a talent for storytelling. “Pow! Right in the kisser! You should have seen her face, Joe!” Yep. “She was all like, “Grr! You will pay for this with your life, insolent mortal!” The truth is, I definitely wanted to know more about how the girls managed to defeat Nightmare Moon without the aid of the Elements of Harmony, and I figured she would be the most inclined to tell me the story. “I made this “come here” motion with my hand and said, “Bring it on, you mule!” Even if she narrated in a way that made it seem she was fighting all by herself.
It was close to evening and the sun still shone brightly over Manehattan. I briefly wondered if Celestia and Luna also dictated the length of the days here in Equestria, with their influence over the sun and the moon respectively. Not that it bothered me, I hated those months in which the night arrived earlier. No offense, Princess Luna. I looked around the street. Interesting. There weren’t any cars, but horse drawn carriages instead. Most of them were taxis, with their unmistakable yellow color; others were larger, pulled by two or more horses. Finally, there were a few with a Victorian design. I smiled. All the bustle made me feel right at home.
Next to me, Rainbow Dash continued to narrate enthusiastically. “Then Nightmare Moon spread her huge black wings and shoot them forward like arrows! Shhwaff!” She crouched and made a couple of ducking motions that reminded me of a profesional boxer. “But I dodged her attack and held her like this!” She suddenly grabbed me in a bear-hug, lifting me above the ground like I weighed nothing. “Then I spread my wings and shoot upwards at full speed! Shmm!” Much to my surprise, she smelled really nice; like sea breeze.
Rainbow Dash released me. Damn, I wouldn’t had minded if she wanted to hold me like that for the remainder of the trip. She pointed a finger upwards. “I kept going up and up, above the clouds! Nightmare Moon said “Fool! Do you think the freezing air will be enough to stop me? Your body will succumb before mine!” She grinned confidently. I nodded fascinated. This girl had a smile that made you feel she could conquer any obstacle that stood in her way. “I told her “Who said I wanted to freeze you? I’m just gaining speed!” So I made a somersault and dive bombed!” She traced an arc with her right hand, followed by doing a circling motion downwards with her index finger. “PEGASUS ROLLING CRASH! FWOOSH!” I’m pretty sure I’ve heard that one somewhere else. “I jumped away at the last second and Nightmare Moon crashed on the ground! BOOM! The whole castle shook and there was this crater the size of a house—no, make it two houses!”
I glanced behind me and saw Applejack rolling her eyes while Twilight smiled sheepishly. Spike seemed to be enjoying the tale, though. I smiled and asked. “So did you take her down with that attack?” Rainbow Dash admitted. “Well, no.” She added confidently. “But I estimate I took about fifty percent of her health.” Applejack commented drily. “What would we do without you, Rainbow.” I smiled and asked. “Lose about eighty percent of our coolness?” Rainbow Dash grinned. She tilted her head at me. “See? Joe here gets it.” Applejack laughed and slapped me lightly on the back of the head. Ouch.
As we made our way through the city, there were plenty of reactions from the passersby; including giggles, looks of disapproval, amusement and, of course, whistles. No points for guessing who drew most of these. Not that I could blame them, honestly. Rainbow Dash casually asked Twilight. “Where did you say we were going?”
Twilight checked a small notebook she pulled from a pocket on her coat and replied. “The Ariadne Mill. That’s where Rarity is working and the closest to our current location.” She turned a page. “From there, we can get a taxi to take us to the Golden Fleece Farm, where Fluttershy volunteered.” Rainbow Dash nodded. “Got it.” Sure enough we arrived outisde an old, two-story building with a brick exterior, about two dozen of windows and a single chimney constantly spewing out smoke towards the sky.
Rainbow Dash looked at the textile mill building and frowned. “Are you telling me Rarity is working there?” She snorted. “Honestly, I can’t see her setting a single foot inside without anything less than a hazmat suit.” Spike lifted a hand and calmly interjected. “This is Rarity, remember? I bet she’s sitting comfortably on the management’s office and coming up with all sort of ideas to improve the uniforms designs.” He put both hands on his hips with a smile of pride across his face. Applejack chuckled. “Little Spike is right. Knowin’ Rarity, Ah’ bet she’s givin’ orders left and right as we speak.” Twilight adjusted her glasses. “Let’s go.”
Inside, we were greeted by a chorus of of machinery whirring and the sight of a crowd of men and women working on seaming, folding and packing uniforms similar to those Rainbow Dash wore, as well as hats, coats, gloves and other kinds of winter clothing. I looked around and asked. “So, where do we start?” Twilight immediately approached a young man pushing a cart filled to the brim with blankets and asked about Rarity. The man pointed a finger behind him and returned to his duties after a brief “thank you” from Twilight. And there was Rarity, wearing a baggy, grey uniform; her hair tangled and messy, and a look of exhaustion all over her face, as she worked on a small, sewing station. I cringed. So far, everybody seemed to have avoided their darker fates from The Cutie Re-Mark. I mean, Ponyville was pretty much the same and Rainbow Dash wasn’t missing a wing or part of her ear, but it seems it wasn’t the case with poor Rarity.
Spike called her name loudly. “Rarity!” She looked up and made eye contact with them. Rarity put both hands over her mouth with a gasp, her eyes swelling with tears and tackled Twilight, Applejack, Rainbow Dash and Spike simultaneously. Then she cried. Loudly. I mean it. Pretty much every other worker around us turned to watch in bewilderment.
Twilight held Rarity in her arms. The tears and snot continued to stream down Rarity’s cheeks as she bawled, occasionally toning it down to a few hics, before starting again. It was heartbreaking. And slightly embarrassing. We just stood there, patiently waiting for her to let it all out. In the meantime, I managed to discern a couple of words between all her sobbing, including “Sweetie Belle”, “Opal” and, of course, “the worst possible thing”. The workers eventually stopped paying attention and returned to their jobs.
At last, Rarity calmed down. She whispered softly. “I missed you all so much.” Twilight nodded. “So we did.” Applejack assured. “And you don’t have to worry, sugarcube. Sweetie Belle and Opal are fine.” She looked at Rainbow Dash unamusedly. “So is Tank, thanks for askin’.” Rainbow Dash giggled sheepsihly. Rarity nodded. “Thank you, Applejack.” Spike added meekly. “I cleaned the dried leaves around your boutique.” Rarity patted him affectionately on the head. “Thank you, Spike-Wikey.” He blushed. She admitted. “I can’t believe you all came to visit me.” Twilight cheerfully clarified. “It’s more than that, Rarity. We’re reuniting the whole team to fight against King Sombra.” Rarity’s eyes widened in shock. She looked around her and was met with firm nods from Applejack, Spike and Rainbow Dash. Twilight asked. “Will you join us?” Rarity dried her tears and stood up. She flicked her hair and answered firmly. “Of course.”
Rainbow Dash clashed her fists together enthusiastically. “Alright! Time to go after Fluttershy!” Rarity’s eyes widened in shock. “Please tell me you did not walk all the way here dressed like that.” Rainbow Dash glanced down at her tight shorts and tank top and shrugged. “Uh, yeah? My uniform was kinda done for, so…” Rarity frowned disapprovingly. “I understand you are proud of your physique, Rainbow Dash, but would it kill you to behave in a more ladylike way?” Rainbow Dash crossed both arms over her chest and rolled her eyes. Oy vey. I cleared my throat, getting their attention. Twilight squeaked in embarrassment. “Ah! Rarity, this is Joe. He’s a human from the Earth who has been helping us all the way here.”
I greeted softly. “Hi, Rarity.” She looked me up and down, shrieked and hid behind her sewing station. I blinked. Okay. I’m well aware I’m not getting a place in the Hollywood’s most handsome actors list anytime soon, but I think that was a bit of an overreaction. Spike held his index finger in a “one minute please” gesture and asked Rarity. “What’s wrong?” She whispered hurriedly. “Why didn’t you tell me there was a human with you?” Applejack shrugged. “We just did.” Rarity groaned in exasperation. “Look at me, Applejack! I’m an unsightly mess! You can’t possibly expect me to introduce myself to a visitor from another world like this!” Rainbow Dash slapped her forehead. Twilight looked between her and me awkwardly. “I…don’t think Joe will mind, Rarity.” I smiled. I endured being tortured with a card game; I think I can do the same with unkempt hair.
Rarity whispered conspiratorially. “Maybe, but then he will return to his world and share his experiences. His family and friends will ask and he will gladly tell them about the wonders of Equestria and the good of its inhabitants.” Her expression turned darker. “Surely somebody will inquire about the negative aspects and he will casually mention this shabby girl he met on a textile mill. The word will spread, every time adding more and more unflattering descriptors until the entire population of the Earth knows me as the hideous abomination that lurks in the sewers and alleys of Manehattan!” Rarity finished her speech by lifting both arms dramatically. Twilight sighed in defeat. “How about we take a rest before continuing with our search?” Rarity pondered it for a moment. “Fair enough.” With an elegant wave of her hand, she levitated a large, violet trunk with golden handles and a diamond pattern from behind her sewing station; carefully placing it so as to block my sight of her. “Let’s make haste.” Applejack, Spike and Rainbow Dash performed a collective sigh. I smiled sympathetically. Man, I felt like the main character of a RPG, traveling all over the world while recruiting quirky allies.
Using her “special card”, Twilight booked us two rooms in the Golden Hind Hotel. A smaller suite with two beds and a single bathroom for Spike and I, and a larger suite with two double beds and two bathrooms for her and the girls. Hmm. So, instead of being a princess, this Twilight has access to the Royal Treasury? Not a bad trade, if you ask me.
The rooms were located next to each other. Twilight suggested we met here, on the hallway, in about one hour. Rarity whined. “One hour? Do you expect me to get ready in such a short time, Twilight Sparkle?” Twilight replied solemny. “I want to find Fluttershy as soon as posible.” Rarity curled her lower lip and nodded. “Very well.” She declared dramatically. “For the sake of Fluttershy, I shall make the best of the time I have.” With those words, she went into her room, her trunk floating behind her. Spike quickly said. “I call dibs on the bathroom, Joe!” He ran into our room. Applejack shrugged. “The last one is a rotten apple, ah’ guess.” Twilight removed her glasses and said. “One hour.” The two of them went inside their room. Rainbow Dash shrugged. “You heard them.” She suddenly stopped under the doorway, looked over her shoulder and said suggestively. “Hey, Joe. If you don’t feel like waiting for Spike to finish, we can always shower together.”
Oh, ho, ho, ho. Aren’t you witty, Rainbow Dash? But that won’t work on me this time. I smiled and said. “Sure!” She chuckled and, without turning to face me, removed her tank top. My eyes widened. Oh God. Not only she was well toned, her pale skin was incredibly smooth too and her back had a perfect curvature that made me want to trace a line with my tongue all the way from her waist to the back of her neck. What? I think at this point it’s quite clear that I’m not made of ice. “You coming in?” My legs wobbled. How was that saying? Humility in victory, dignity in defeat? I gulped as discreetely as I could and calmly replied. “I think I’ll wait until Spike is finished. Thank you.” Rainbow Dash chuckled. “Suit yourself.” The sound of the door closing behind her echoed in the hallway. Damn it. I’m gonna need a cold shower.
Have you ever caught sight of something, or better yet, somebody and lost track of everything that was going on around you? Yeah. Let me tell you, Rarity wasn’t kidding when she said she would make the best use of her hour. Instead of oversized work shoes, she wore elegant, wide fit pointed black shoes. A pair of black jeans hugged her slender, shapely legs and ass nicely. She was more voluptuous than Twilight and Rainbow Dash, but not Applejack. I suspected this was the result of a nice balance between her natural physique and an exercise routine. Her white silk shirt was partially unbuttoned and slightly transparent, allowing me to make out the shape of the black bra holding her medium sized breasts. Her long, curly purple hair was fashioned into a ponytal resting over her left shoulder; a single strand between her sapphire blue eyes, their colors heightened by her milky white skin.
Spike said dreamily. “You look amazing, Rarity.” She smiled and thanked him. Damn. No wonder he developed a crush on her at first sight. It wasn’t just her looks. Her posture, eyes and expression; everything exuded confidence and charm.
Rarity looked at me with a pleasant smile and extended her hand. “It’s a pleasure to meet you, Joe.” She turned her nose slightly upwards. “I am Rarity, profesional designer and fashion entrepreneur.” I nodded dumbfounded and accepted her shake. “Uh-huh.” Her hand was so smooth and delicate that I unconciously held a soft grasp on her fingers and she took it back. Rarity smiled knowingly. Jesus. I felt like my cheeks were on fire.
Rainbow Dash asked. “Hey, what about me?” She kept the combat boots, but now wore blue jeans and a tight, sleeveless black shirt. Courtesy of Rarity, I imagine. Now, I’m not sure if she had unfolded her wings to look cooler, but I blurted absentmindedly. “You look like an angel.” Rainbow Dash tilted her head puzzled. “Thanks?” She whispered to Twilight. “What’s an angel?” Twilight explained. “In human beliefs, they are spiritual beings of superior power and wisdom.” She added with a mischievous smile. “They are often represented as winged, human-like creatures of extraordinary beauty.” Rainbow Dash blushed. “Oh…” Rarity giggled. “Oh my, I think I’m a bit jealous.” Applejack laughed. “Got you there, sugarcube.” Rainbow Dash looked away with a grumpy face. Now who would have thought she would look so cute when angry? I’m definitely keeping that one in mind for later.
After leaving Spike’s backpack and Rarity’s trunk at our rooms, we left the hotel and took a large taxi towards our next destination, the Augean Sheep Farm, where we would find Fluttershy. The sun was setting over Manehattan, bathing the city with its light and giving the buildings a nice orange hue that made them look like they were made of bronze instead of concrete and steel. I sat next to Twilight and Spike, with him in the middle, while Rarity, Applejack and Rainbow Dash sat in front of us. We were all outfitted with Duel Disks.
Rarity asked casually. “Beautiful, isn’t?” I nodded and said. “It reminds me of my home.” She smiled in surprise. “Do you live in a big city?” I nodded again. Rarity declared. “Next to Canterlot, Manehattan is the height of sophistication, elegance and culture.” She looked away wistfully. “Hopefully I will be able to open a boutique of my own here.” So no “Rarity For You” here yet? I wonder if she opened her boutique in Canterlot. I asked. “Shouldn’t you be aiming for Canterlot first?” Rarity waved her hand with a haughty giggle. “Oh, I already did.” She added softly. “With a bit of help from Princess Celestia.” I narrowed my eyes slightly. “Help?” She smirked. “Let’s just say that saving the world from an eternal night has its benefits.” I blinked in surprise and looked at the others. Applejack grinned and said unprompted. “A new barn.” Rainbow Dash shrugged. “Tickets for the Wonderbolts.” What a twist. Spike pointed with his thumb at Twilight. He smirked. “Access to the Royal Treasury.” Twilight protested with embarrassment. “I did not ask for it, okay?”
I laughed. Stained glass windows are nice, but this was a proper reward, if you ask me. I commented. “Nice to see you all got what you deserved.” Applejack nodded. “Eeyup! Ah’ bet the Princess will reward you too when this is all over.” I scratched the back of my neck embarrassed. “Me? Oh, no, no—I’m not looking for a reward—I mean, I agreed to do this because Twilight asked.” Rainbow Dash grinned widely. “Something tells me that skirt of hers played a part in convincing you.” Twilight’s face turned beet red. Revenge is a dish best served cold, I guess. Spike looked at me puzzled. “What does Twilight skirt have to do with anything?” I felt the heat rising on my cheeks. “N-Nothing!” I shook my head rapidly. “I-It’s just a silly joke.”
Rarity declared dreamily. “A knight fighting for the sake of a lady! How romantic!” Twilight’s blush deepened. Applejack pushed her hat over her face, unsuccessfully trying to muffle her laughs; Rainbow Dash was far less subtle about it. Spike still found laughter contagious, by the way. Now, maybe it was because I had already reached the human limits of embarrassment and ultimately came to a full circle, but I found myself strangely calm. I confessed. “You know, when I arrived here, I was very confused and somewhat nervous.” I paused to make sure I had their attention. “But after my first duel, I became very excited.” I patted my Duel Disk. “At least until we arrived to Ponyville.” Applejack cringed and looked down. “It was then I realized how much there was a stake...and how much I want to protect this world and everybody here.” I took a deep breath and said firmly. “Not just because they deserve to be protected, but because of my pride…as a man.” I was met with looks of approval. Phew. For a moment, I was afraid of coming out as old fashioned.
Rarity crossed her legs and leaned forward, resting her chin over her hand. She looked at me intently and I could see myself reflected on those beautiful eyes of her. She asked softly. “Will you protect me too, Joe?” My heart jumped. I quickly put my hand over Spike’s shoulder and said. “Of course we will.” He puffed his chest out and declared. “Yeah!”
Twilight giggled, Rainbow Dash chuckled and Applejack mouthed a “nice save” to me. Rarity smiled warmly and said. “Thank you.”
Applejack, Rainbow Dash and I waited on the taxi while Rarity, Twilight and Spike went inside the Golden Fleece Farm looking for Fluttershy. I scratched my chin thoughtfully. “A sheep farm, huh?” Applejack nodded. “Eeyup!” She explained cheerfully. “Fluttershy has a talent for dealin’ with critters of all kinds and, bein’ the good gal she is, she wanted to do somethin’ to make the whole deal less stressful to them.” I smiled and nodded. To be honest, I was more curious about her job. Would she be shaving sheep like in the show or something else? Applejack added. “She’s a really kind girl; I bet you would like her, Joe.” Rainbow Dash smiled mischievously. “And not just for her personality!” I looked away flustered. They bumped their fists triumpanthly. I had a feeling they were not going to stop anytime soon.
Just then, Rarity, Twilight and Spike came back running to us. Spike exclaimed. “S-She’s gone!” Rainbow Dash frowned. “What do you mean “she’s gone?” Rarity took a second to regain her breath and explained. “The manager told us she hasn’t seen Fluttershy in three days.” Rainbow Dash and Applejack cried in unison. “What?!” I gritted my teeth. Again? What the hell is going on here? Twilight told everybody to calm down. She asked. “Rarity, when was the last time you saw Fluttershy?” Rarity’s eyes widened. “Three days ago…”
Rainbow Dash flared her wings. I swear it looked more impressive every time she did it. “That’s it! I’m going to look for her!” Applejack quickly placed a hand on her shoulder. “Hold yer horses, Rainbow! Splittin’ won’t do us any good!” Rainbow Dash slapped Applejack’s hand away. “I can circle this whole city in less than three minutes! So, unless you know where to look for, you better stay out of my way!” Both of them glared at each other. Rarity quickly interjected. “Wait! I know of a place!” She added. “It's the only place where Fluttershy could have gone.”
Rarity bit her thumb. She asked worried. “So you haven’t seen her, Coco?” Coco Pommel shook her head with aprehension. “I’m sorry, Miss Rarity.” She was a cute, petite girl; to the point you could have easily mistaken her for a teenager. Coco had short, cyan colored hair and the softest blue eyes. She wore brown shoes and knee high white socks; a light brown mini-skirt and a white shirt all buttoned up, with a lavender sailor collar and a red tie. Now, I’m aware it wasn’t the appropiate time, but seeing Coco with such a sad face made me want to hold her in my arms and assure her everything was going to be fine.
Rainbow Dash let out a growl of frustration. “Can we do it my way now?” Twilight shook her head. “We cannot risk splitting the group, Rainbow.” Rainbow Dash flared her nose. “So what? Do we just walk around asking? Did you bring a picture? Huh?” She snarled. “It’s been three days, Twilight! Three freaking days!” There was a moment of grim silence. Coco meekly suggested. “You could…try with the Dark Dueling Circuit.” I frowned. “What’s that?” Twilight whispered to me. “In Equestria, gambling is strictly forbidden when it comes to Duel Monsters, but that doesn’t stop some people.” I nodded. Rarity asked in shock. “There’s one of those in Manehattan?” Coco nodded. “From what I’ve heard, they not only deal with money and rare cards, but information too.” We looked at each other. Applejack declared. “Sounds like a plan to me.” Rainbow Dash added firmly. “Count me in.”
Coco pleaded. “Let me go with you.” Rarity shook her head. She held Coco’s hand between hers. “No, darling, you have already helped us enough and we need you to stay here at home in case Fluttershy comes back.” Coco nodded. Rarity smiled thankfully and looked at us. “Let’s go.”
At last, the night fell over Manehattan, the full moon standing proudly among the sea of stars at the height of the sky. However, even with their light and that of the lamps and adjacent buildings, the level of activity on the streets had diminished greatly, contrary to my expectations for such a big city. Was it because of the ongoing war?
Now on foot, we followed Rarity around for a while when Rainbow Dash asked. “Do you know where’s this place, Rares”? Rarity shook her head. “No, but I have done plenty of research on Manehattan, including places to avoid, and it’s simply a matter of finding the right person to ask.” She suddenly stopped and pointed with her index finger towards a small, darkened alley. “There.” I squinted. There was a tall, thuggish-looking man standing against the wall under a flickering lamp. He wore brown boots, grey jeans and a jacket of the same color, partially open to expose his prominent pectoral muscles. Spike asked hesitantly. “That guy?”
Rainbow Dash crackled her knuckles. “Great! Just give me five minutes and I’ll have him tell me even his mother’s shoe size.” Rarity placed a hand over Rainbow Dash’s shoulder. “Now, there’s no need to do that. You catch more flies with honey tan vinegar, remember? Stay here.”
We watched as Rarity headed towards the alley alone, her hips swaying seductively. Spike gulped. “Shouldn’t I go with her?” Applejack assured. “It’s okay, Rarity can take care of herself.” Rainbow Dash added. “That and we can get there in the blink of an eye if something happens.” Twilight nodded. Rarity approached the man, hands behind her back and leaning forward slightly as she tilted her head and asked as charmingly as posible. “Excuse me, Sir? Could you help me?”
The man looked at Rarity from bottom to top, lingering a bit too long over her chest. He grinned widely. “Good night to you, sweetheart.” The man stood up and adjusted his belt. “What can I do for you?” Rarity lowered her voice slightly, as if she was trying to share a secret. “I was told there was a…place around here where one could duel discreetely, and I was wondering if you would be so kind as to point me in the right direction.” She fluttered her eyelashes. The man chuckled in amusement and tilted his head towards the street. “Two blocks down there’s an alley with a small, rusted door.” He whispered. “Knock three times, show the guy a rare card and you will be let in.”
Rarity smiled sweetly. “Thank you very much for your help, Sir.” Just as she turned to leave, the man swiftly got a hold of her left wrist. “Now wait a minute, sweetheart.” He grinned lewdly. “I don’t know you, but where I come from that kind of information deserves a handsome reward.” He extended his index finger and poked Rarity on the left breast. It happened on the blink of an eye. With an speed that reminded me of a pouncing lioness, Rarity slapped the man’s hand away from her wrist. She said harshly. “Where I come from, we’re taught to do good without expecting anything in return.” The man scoffed. “Feisty, huh?” He attempted to grab her from the collar of her shirt, but Rarity stepped aside and her open hand struck the man on the ear like a whip. He yelled in pain and stumbled. The man shook his head, decided all bets were off and threw a fierce punch.
Spike gasped. I watched mesmerized as Rarity lifted her arm across her face, so the point of her elbow was on the course of the incoming fist. Crack! The sound of the man’s fingers breaking echoed across the alley. Without even giving him time to scream, Rarity delivered a swift kick to the man’s groin that made me wince and left him on the ground. I gulped. Those movements weren’t just the product of a couple of self-defense classes or even the experience of past catfights. No, that was some serious martial arts expertise. How can I tell? Let's just say I have some of that myself.
Rarity daintily jogged back to us. She patted her hair tentatively and let out a small sigh. Spike exclaimed astonished. “Rarity, that was…” She interrupted him. “Crude, darling, I know. But, sometimes, a lady has to get her hands dirty.” I chuckled. Man, I love the kind of woman who can kick ass.
Two blocks later, we ventured into a small, dark alley filled with empty boxes and thrashcans. It didn’t took us long to find the door, the only one on the stone wall filled with all kinds of crude drawings. Applejack asked. “Knock three times and show a rare card?” Rarity nodded. I stepped forward. “Leave it to me.” I knocked three times. A panel slid open in the door and I flashed whoever stood behind my Blue-Eyes White Dragon. The panel slammed shut and the door creaked slowly open.
Inside the small, grungy room sat a burly man dressed fully in black. He closed the door and motioned us towards a second door. Applejack kept a sharp eye on him as we crossed the doorway. Suddenly, Twilight’s eyes widened and she sharply turned around to glare at the doorkeeper. He grunted. “Rules.” She shook her head with a grumble of frustration. I asked. “What’s wrong?” She replied. “A mind magic seal.” She clarified. “My magic is being blocked.” Rarity added. “Mine too.” Applejack said. “We better stay on our toes.”
We walked down the hallway. Rarity let out a soft gasp and tightly held my left arm. I watched with mild amusement as she looked up and down, desperately trying to avoid stepping on one of the many puddles on the floor while simultaneously avoiding the drops leaking from the industrial pipes above us.
A third door awaited us at the end. Rainbow Dash pushed it open, letting the light and noise flood the hallway. The first thing we saw was the large steel cage on the middle of the huge, open squared room, surrounded by a dozen rows of fully occupied wooden benches on each side, where two men were dueling against each other. One of them ordered the direct attack of his Blood Vorse, lowering the life points of the other to zero and sending his body slamming against the metal bars. The people around the cage yelled and whistled furiously. We could not help but watch in awe.
Rainbow Dash approached a chubby man sitting near us and said. “Hey! I’m looking for a girl! She’s tall, well endowed and has long pink hair!” The man laughed loudly. “You and everybody else, my friend!” Rainbow Dash frowned. “I’m not your friend, buddy!” Now it was the guy’s turn to frown. “Well, I’m not your buddy, pal!” Before Rainbow Dash could reply, Applejack stood between the two of them. She pushed Rainbow Dash aside and apologized to the man. Applejack shook her head. “Dagnabbit, Rainbow, you ain’t gettin’ nowhere like that!” Rainbow Dash grumbled.
We watched as the loser of the previous duel was dragged out and a scrawny, sleazy looking guy with a mullet and a colorful suit took the center of the cage. He patted his microphone tentatively before announcing. “Welcome, my friends, to the third night of the “Duel Queen Challenge!” The crowd exploded in a chorus of cheers and whistles. “For those of you who are new, allow me to explain the rules!” He cleared his throat. “You have to defeat the Queen’s loyal protectors one by one in order to be granted an audience! And if you defeat her, you will get the prize of fifty thousand bits!” He winked exaggeratedly. “Plus, she will give you a very private dueling lesson, if you get my drift!” The room was filled with the whistles and cheers of the crowd. Twilight frowned and commented. “I don’t think I like the sound of that “private lesson.” Rarity added. “Neither do I.”
The announcer pointed a finger towards the ceiling. “And now, let’s give a warm welcome to our Duel Queen!” The whole room vibrated with the howls and cheers of the crowd as a young girl entered the cage flanked by two burly men wearing black clothes and a bespectacled man with curly pinkish hair wearing an expensive looking blue suit. I narrowed my eyes. Where do I have seen that guy before?
Spike pointed a finger. “Isn’t that Fluttershy?” I blinked in shock. Holy shit. She was as tall as Applejack, with pale skin and long pink hair that fell freely over back and shoulders while her light green eyes glanced around her timidly. Rainbow Dash’s growled. “You gotta be kidding me!” Fluttershy wore a white, shoulderless dress with a long skirt that went down her ankles and evening gloves of the same color. She took the microphone and said. “Um…I want to thank everybody for participating and encourage you to do your best.” The men in the crowd whistled and shouted all manner of things; from “I love you” and “marry me” to far more detailed descriptions of their most primal urges. I gritted my teeth. It wasn’t just the soft, attractive features of her face; Fluttershy’s bust could easily compete with that of Mrs. Cake and the dress was obviously tailored to emphasize that, resulting in a cleavage that made you feel that you could get lost there. I shook my head; now was not the time for that.
Rarity shivered. “This place makes me feel dirty merely by standing here.” The announcer took the microphone back and Fluttershy was escorted outside the cage. Rainbow Dash called her name. Fluttershy turned to look over her shoulder, but the bespectacled man quickly put a hand on her back and lead her into a separate room. Rainbow Dash was fuming. Twilight quickly stood in front of her. “Calm down, Rainbow Dash! We can’t just rush in!” Rainbow Dash protested. “Why not? I bet AJ, Rarity and I can take them on!” Twilight shook her head. “What if the crowd turns against us? What if there’s a riot?” She continued. “My magic is sealed and Spike is too young.” He pouted but said nothing. “And Joe is a human, remember? Equestrians, even those without magic, are far stronger than them on average.”
I curled my lower lip thoughtfully. Certain ants can lift fifty times their own body weight with their jaws alone. That’s about the same as a human lifting a truck with his teeth. Now, ponies on the show are capable of some amazing feats; breaking the sound barrier, pulling a train behind them, etc. If those capabilities were translated into a human form, it would be natural to end up with a race of “super” individuals. And, if this principle goes for the other sentient species too, that means the Cattle Rustlers were dudes with the equivalent strenght of a bull. In conclusion, I'm at a severe disadvantage here.
Applejack put a hand on Rainbow Dash’s shoulder. “Let’s beat them at their own game.” Rainbow Dash nodded, took out her deck and inserted it on her Duel Disk. “Let’s kick some ass.”
The announcer declared. “Alright! Those of you who wish to take the challenge, please talk to our representative!” He pointed towards an old man sitting on a stool near the corner with a notepad in hand. “And for those who want to watch, make your bets!” Nearly every single one of the presents ran towards a nearby booth, administered by two young women backed by three burly men, firmly clenching bags filled with bits. Guess this is were the real business was. I told the girls I was going to inscribe us.
An underground duel. I would be lying if I said I wasn't excited. The old man greeted me cheerfully. “Are you here to take the challenge, Sonny?” I nodded. “Me and my five friends.” The old man adjusted his stool. “Very well, here’s the deal.” He lifted a bony finger. “The Queen has five bodyguards and you’ve got to beat them all to reach her, ‘kay? So, let’s say you go first. If you win, you keep dueling until you lose and then one of your friends takes your place. If five of you lose, then’s it’s the end of the road. Got it?” I nodded. “Great.” He licked the tip of his pencil and asked. “Your names?” I replied. “I’m Joe.” He quickly interrupted me. “Listen, Sonny, you’re new here, aren’t you?” I nodded puzzled. “You don’t need to give me your real name, but you need to come up with something catchy.” The old man tilted his head towards the cage. “We’re trying to put up a show here, you know.”
After racking my brain for a couple of minutes trying to come up with acceptable names, I returned to the group and explained the rules. Shortly after, we were led to the bench reserved for the challengers, located right next to the cage. The announcer declared. “Now that we’ve got our challengers, it’s time to greet our Noble Knights!” Five men dressed in flashy clothes came into the room, drawing plenty of cheers and claps from the crowd. They sat on the bench opposite to us; all of them looking very smug. Rarity commented with an expression of distaste. “Heavens! Look at those outfits! It’s like they came from robbing a garage sale!”
The announcer continued. “Let’s determine the first match!” The same old man from before approached the announcer with two small bags, one on each hand. The announcer picked a piece of paper from inside of each bag without looking. “Let’s see…” He unfolded the first and declared dramatically. “Oh! Our first knight is none other than Black Flare Smith! The invincible!” The crowd roared. One of the “noble knights” stood up. He was a young man with wild orange hair, dressed entirely in shades of red and black. He entered the cage and lifted his left arm, with his Duel Disk attached, as if it were a sword. The announcer looked at the other piece of paper. “Versus Angelface!” The girls, plus Spike, looked at me. I tilted my head towards Rainbow Dash. She chuckled softly and went inside the cage without a word. We cheered as she stood face to face with her opponent.
Black Flare Smith pointed a finger and declared. “You should know even Celestia would bow down to me if I opposed her!” Rainbow Dash scoffed. “I’ll make sure to pass the message next time I see her.” The announcer asked. “Are you ready?” Both players activated their Duel Disks, their life points briefly appearing above them at 4000 each. “It’s time to duel!” The crowd exploded with cheers, whistles and jeers.
Rainbow Dash went first. “Draw!” She took six cards from her deck and summoned Featherman in attack position. The hero announced his presence with a mighty battle cry. Rainbow Dash set two cards and ended her turn. “Come on!”
Black Flare Smith drew his six cards and examined his hand briefly. He shook his head. “You already lost.” He activated Dual Summon , followed by Angel's Charity , drawing three cards and discarding two, before summoning Witch of the Black Forest in attack position. The announcer asked. “Ohhh! Could it be?” Black Flare Smith lifted a finger. “Come! Chaos Emperor Dragon - Envoy of the End !” He banished the discarded Killer Tomato and Shining Angel from his graveyard. My eyes widened in shock as the monstrous dragon appeared on the field with a roar that shook the whole room.
Twilight exclaimed “It’s the “Yata-Garasu Lockdown Combo!” Rarity asked. “What’s that?” Twilight explained. “He’s going to use the effect of the Emperor Dragon to wipe out both player’s field and hand then attack with Yata-Garasu to lock Rainbow Dash’s plays! It’s a very powerful combination made with some of the rarest cards!” Rarity gulped. Unbelievable. I never expected to see the combo that got those cards banned back on the Earth here. Sure enough, Black Flare Smith payed 1000 life points, his Emperor Dragon shone like a miniature sun and exploded, erasing every card on the field, forcing both players to discard their hand and taking Rainbow Dash’s life points down to a mere 700. Black Flare Smith used the effect of the Witch of the Black Forest, calmly taking Yata-Garasu from his deck and summoning it in attack position.
The announcer shouted. “Yes! It’s Black Flare Smith’s signature play, my friends! This duel is oficially over!” The crowd roared. But Rainbow Dash didn’t look concerned at all. Black Flare Smith asked. “Any last words?” She grinned confidently. “Bring it on!” He scoffed. “Fine! I’ll peck you to death! Go, Yata-Garasu!” The three legged crow flew like an arrow, but much to the shock of the presents, it crashed against an invisible wall that sent it stumbling backwards and cawing loudly in protest. The announcer stammered. “W-What happened?!” Rainbow Dash picked a card from her graveyard and showed it. “Necro Gardna !” She smirked. “By banishing this fella I can negate a single attack!” The announcer’s jaw fell. “Unbelievable…the invincible combination has been blocked!” Murmurs of disbelief filled the room. Black Flare Smith’s left eye twitched. He growled. “Fine.” Yata-Garasu returned to his hand as he finished his turn. “See if I care! You’re done for anyway!”
Rainbow Dash chuckled. “Did I rain on your parade?” She held the first card of her deck between her index and thumb, took a breath and pulled with such strenght she wiped up a gale. “Elemental HERO Bubbleman !” Incredible. Rainbow Dash used the effect of Bubbleman to draw two cards and normal summoned Burst Lady . “Combined attack! Bubble Burst Shot!” Black Flare Smith braced himself as he took the attack from the two heroes and his life points went down to 1000. He growled. “I’m still here!” Rainbow Dash said. “Not for long.” She activated Instantaneous Fusion , combining Bubbleman and Burst Lady into Steam Healer . Rainbow Dash ordered casually. “Steam Blast.” Steam Healer reared his large mechanical hand backwards and launched a stream that sent Black Flare Smith bouncing against the metal bars and his life points down to zero.
Applejack threw her hat in the air. “Yee-haw!” Twilight, Rarity and Spike cheered loudly. The announcer muttered in disbelief. “The winner is Angelface…” The crowd fell silent. Rainbow Dash looked around, spread her arms and said. “Come on! Are you not entertained?” I chuckled. Considering they probably bet against us, I doubt it.
Rainbow Dash loved attention. Thank you for that stunning revelation, Captain Obvious. What’s next? Twilight loves to read? Outrageous! Quit the sarcasm and hear me out, okay? It’s one thing to stand before a cheering crowd; it’s a completely different thing to have that same crowd boo and insult you at the top of their lungs. I never imagined I would see her enjoying the latter; but there she was, a victorious smile across her face, and waving her hands as if telling the spectators to go ahead and yell some more.
The announcer stepped into the cage and tried to calm down the audience while a couple of the burly guys in black dragged Black Flare Smith outside. I commented. “It seems he was hit pretty hard.” Twilight explained. “Duel Disks have a function to regulate the damage inflicted by the holographic projections. At the minimum you won’t feel anything, but at maximum…” She gestured towards the cage. “It’s not a “Game of Darkness”, but it packs a punch.” I nodded.
Those guys we saw dueling when we came here first must’ve had their disks set to maximum damage input too. Rainbow Dash probably adjusted hers after seeing them. I looked at Twilight and suggested we follow her example. She said. “We already did.” I blinked in surprise. “Oh? Mine then?” Twilight glanced at my Duel Disk, her eyes glowing in the faintest purple for a second. “The seal in this place is not strong enough to block me completely.” She declared. “Done.” I quirked an eyebrow. “That’s it?” She nodded. “Your Duel Disk is special. I can adjust the damage output remotely.” I thought for a moment, and then punched my palm in realization. “Oh! You gave me it in case I turned out to be untrustworthy, right?” I smiled approvingly. “That was quite clever.”
Much to my surprise, Twilight cringed. “I…didn’t mean to deceive you, Joe.” I shrugged. “I know you didn’t.” She shook her head. “No, you listen to me.” Her pleading tone caught me by surprise. I decided to keep quiet. Twilight looked down. “I’m sure you have noticed the extent of my magic, right?” She admitted shamefully. “Back then, I could have used my full power to free Ponyville, but I didn’t…I couldn’t bring myself to risk hurting others.” I gulped. “That’s why I sought help from the Earth and, after you agreed, I came with the whole plan on the spot.” She elaborated. “Spike and I would be “captured” to distract Applejack, make her lower her guard and ensure she wouldn’t send the townsfolk against us, then you would challenge her and the shock from the Duel Disk would bring her back to her senses…” I nodded slowly. So that was the whole plan, huh?
Twilight kept looking at the ground with apprehension. I sighed. “Didn’t we already have this talk?” Twilight looked at me. I said casually. “I wasn’t angry then, I’m not angry now; if that’s what you’re thinking.” She asked meekly. “Not even a little?” I laughed. “Nope. In fact, now that I know you held back and took such a gamble for the sake of everybody in Ponyville, I think I trust you more.” Twilight’s eyes widened. She said. “T-Thanks…” I shook my head. “It’s nothing. Plus, that certainly explains why the attack of my Blue-Eyes was so powerful.” Twilight looked away with a thoughtful frown on her face. She muttered. “Yes.” Huh? Did I say something wrong?
The sudden uproar from the crowd got our attention. We looked at the cage, where a young man with small, shifty eyes had taken Black Flare Smith’s place. He too, was dressed fully in black, with red stripes like those of a tiger all over his clothing. His hair was quite long and stylized into four thick locks going downwards, two at the back of his head and the other two at the sides. The announcer introduced him with great fanfare. “The Duelist without mercy! They call him “Death’s Ambassador”! He is…Dark Reaper!” The crowd cheered loudly. Rainbow Dash didn’t seem impressed.
Spike commented. “I wonder if he’s better than the other guy.” Rarity’s nose wrinkled. “Hopefully his dueling skills won’t be inversely proportional to his fashion sense.” Applejack yelled. “You kick his ass, Rainbow!” Rainbow Dash pushed a button on her Duel Disk and her deck was re-shuffled automatically. Both players stood at the ready with their life points displaying at 4000 each. The announcer declared loudly. “It’s time to duel!”
Dark Reaper pointed with his finger and declared. “I WILL DESTROY YOUR VERY SOUL!” Ow. I think I just cut myself from all that edge. He drew six cards, summoned Axe Dragonute and activated Ectoplasmer . He gleefully declared the end of his turn. Axe Dragonute let out a howl, its body crumbling like a rag doll as its soul emerged, circling around Dark Reaper a couple of times before launching itself forward at Rainbow Dash, who crossed both arms in front of her, but still got pushed back a few feet. Her life points lowered to 3000.
Spike cringed at the sight of Axe Dragonute’s empty husk disappearing like smoke. “That was just cruel.” Rarity comfortingly patted him in the back.
Rainbow Dash drew six cards and eyed the Ectoplasmer card warily. She played a monster face-down and declared. “Done!”
Dark Reaper drew a card, played a monster face-down and set a card. “Turn end.”
Rainbow Dash drew a card, set two and finished her turn.
Rarity commented. “She’s being especially careful.” Twilight explained. “Ectoplasmer forces both players to sacrifice a face-up monster at the end of each of their respective turns.” Rarity nodded. Twilight added. “Unless she’s got a way to destroy it, the best she can do now is wait for the right moment to launch a counterattack.”
Dark Reaper drew a card and grinned. He flip summoned Stealth Bird , dealing 1000 points to damage to Rainbow Dash, and then snapped his fingers to make the large bird of prey, with feathers like the azure sky, fold its wings and turn face-down once again. Dark Reaper continued by summoning Killer Doll of Malice . The devilish puppet appeared on the field with a loud cackle. He activated Nightmare's Steelcage and finished his turn. A wicked spirit burst from the mouth of the Killer Doll of Malice, swiftly attacking Rainbow Dash and putting her life points on 1200.
The announcer yelled enthusiastically. “That’s Dark Reaper to you! All those who oppose him shall meet their doom!” Rarity bit her lower lip. “Let’s just hope the right moment comes soon.”
Rainbow Dash scoffed. “Draw!” She looked at her newest card, smiled in approval and declared loudly. “Final turn!” She flip summoned Featherman and played Fusion to combine him with Wildman on her hand. “Elemental HERO Wild Wingman !” The newest hero materialized with a gale that forced several people in the crowd, including us, to cover their eyes. “Wing Impulse!” Rainbow Dash discarded two cards and Wild Wingman vanished Ectoplasmer and Nightmare Steelcage with a single flap of his wings. Dark Reaper flinched, causing Rainbow Dash to smirk and say. “You have seen nothing yet!” She activated the effect of the discarded Necrodarkman in her graveyard to summon Edgeman without a sacrifice. “Power Edge Attack!” I watched with amusement as the crowd grew silent, leaving only us cheering. Edgeman sliced through the face-down Stealth Bird, inflicting 900 points of damage, while Wild Wingman delivered a powerful backhand slap to Dark Reaper’s face, making him fall on his ass and getting his life points down to 1200.
Spike exclaimed. “She’s trouncing him!”
Rainbow Dash pointed to one of her face-down cards. “Fusion Cancel !” Wild Wingman split back into Featherman and Wildman, both ready to attack.
Applejack chuckled. “At this rate she’s gonna take them all out by herself.”
Suddenly, Dark Reaper smirked, much to our shock and surprise. “Got you!” He activated his set card, Just Desserts , and exclaimed. “DIE AND GO TO TARTARUS!” Rainbow Dash did not even had time to react before the trap inflicted her with 1500 points of damage, snatching the victory from her hands.
The crowd roared as the announced declared. “What incredible comeback!” Dark Reaper stood up slowly, took a deep breath and composed himself. He taunted. “That’s what you get for opposing The Reaper.” The announcer pumped his fist. “The winner is Dark Reaper!” Rainbow Dash kicked the cage in frustration. “Shit!” She returned to the challenger’s bench. A few people among the crowd, not content with just cheering for the winner, laughed and jeered at her. She stood before us, let out a sigh and apologized.
Applejack shook her head. “Don’t say that, sugarcube. You beat one and gave the other a run for his money.” Rarity added. “You showed them we are not to be trifled with.” Twilight adjusted her glasses. “Most importantly, we already have a good idea of what kind of deck he plays. He won’t take us by surprise.” Rainbow Dash smiled. “Thanks.” She sat with a heavy sigh and muttered. “My other set card was Instantaneous Fusion , you know.”
I nodded impressed. Spike counted with his fingers and exclaimed. “That makes five attacks on the same Battle Phase! The guy just had a stroke of luck!” Rainbow Dash lowered her head and muttered. “Uh-huh.” Oh, come on now. I reached and grasped her hand. “Cheer up a bit, okay? Remember you are not alone in this mess.” She looked at me, quirked an eyebrow and said drily. “If you’re going to use my loss as an excuse to hold my hand, at least try to pick up better lines.” I blinked in surprise, quickly let go of her hand and apologized.
Rainbow Dash smiled mischievously. She laughed. “Just kidding! Do you really think I’m that much of a sore loser? Besides.” She winked. “You can hold my hand anytime you want, Joe.” I closed my eyes. The giggles of Twilight, Rarity and Applejack, plus Spike’s snickers, told me everything I needed to know about the color my face had taken. I looked at Rainbow Dash. “That was for the nickname thing, wasn’t it?” She nodded. “Yup!” I chuckled. Figures. Oh, and before you ask, her hand was soft and delicate, much to my surprise.
Applejack clapped her hands together. “Alright! Who’s next?” Twilight tilted her head towards the cage. “That’s still for them to decide.” The announcer picked up a new piece of paper. “The next challenger is…Thunder Thighs!” Once again, I found myself as the center of the girls’, and Spike, attention. I pointed at Applejack with an innocent smile. Rainbow Dash laughed. Applejack grinned, stood up and playfully slapped me with her hat before making her way into the cage.
The old man from before approached the announcer and whispered something into his ear. The announcer’s eyes widened and he said cheerfully. “My friends! It’s time to take this challenge to the next level!” The crowd exploded in a chorus of cheers and whistles. We looked around bewildered. What the hell was with these people? One of the burly dudes in black entered the cage, approaching Applejack and carrying a pair of black, thick metal collars. She eyed them warily. “What the hay are those things?” The man answered. “I need to put these around your legs.” Applejack quirked an eyebrow. “Yer kiddin’ me, right?” The man shook his head. “You need to do this if you want to play.” Applejack glanced at Dark Reaper, who had a cocky smile across his face. She grumbled. “Fine.”
Rarity asked. “Twilight, what are those things?” Twilight shook her head. “I don’t know.” She squinted. “They look like some kind of rudimentary magical devices.” I gritted my teeth. Wasn’t there an episode of GX that involved shock collars being used for duels? What if those things are the same? I asked. “Could they be dangerous?” Twilight bit her lower lip hesitantly. “It’s really hard to tell from here.” Rarity asked tentatively. “Shouldn’t we cancel the whole ordeal? Just in case?” Rainbow Dash shook her head. “I’m not leaving here without Fluttershy.” Before Rarity could protest, Rainbow Dash looked at her with a confident smile. “Hey, let’s trust Applejack on this one, okay?” Rarity curled her lower lip and nodded.
The announcer explained. “What you’ve got there, Miss Thunder Thighs.” He pointed at the collars, firmly grasped around Applejack’s legs, over the tibia. “It’s one of the many nifty toys we use to make things more interesting around here!” He added with a grin. “But don’t worry! You will find out what does it do soon enough!” Applejack flared her nose. The announcer declared the start of the duel and both players’ life points appeared briefly at 4000 each.
Dark Reaper went first. He drew his initial hand of six cards and quickly summoned Giant Virus in attack position. "Turn end!"
“Mah’ turn!” Applejack energetically drew six cards from her deck. She summoned Amazoness Trainee , followed by playing Amazoness Village . The whole area inside the cage changed into a dense jungle and the attack points of the Amazoness Trainee went up by 200. “Chain Catch!” The Trainee swung her chain with great dexterity and entangled Dark Reaper’s monster, slamming it against the ground and dissolving it into dust. He gritted his teeth in annoyance and placed the monster card in the bottom of his deck. His life points went down to 3300.
Twilight commented. “When the Trainee destroys a monster in battle she sends it back to the deck, not the graveyard.” Spike added. “That means the Giant Virus effect is useless!” Rainbow Dash looked at Rarity. “See? I told you Applejack could handle it.” Rarity smiled and nodded. I frowned. They didn’t notice, but the bespectacled man from before was watching the duel. He stood on the opposite side of the cage, behind the rows of benches and flanked by two of his burly dudes in black. I bit my lower lip thoughtfully. That cold detached look. I’ve definitely seen this guy before.
The attack points of Amazoness Trainee went up by another 200. Applejack set a card and finished her turn.
“Draw!” Dark Reaper summoned Giant Orc . The tall, ripped orc appeared swinging its bone club menacingly. He commanded. “Crush her!” Applejack smirked and activated her set card. “Chain-Attached Boomerang !” The weapon in the hands of the Amazoness Trainee transformed, increasing her attack points by 500. “Time to lasso it up!” The amazon launched the boomerang and the chain tied itself around the neck of the Giant Orc. The orc tried to resist, but the Amazoness Trainee deftly held her ground and forced it to kneel. Dark Reaper grumbled and set a card. “Turn end!”
Applejack drew. “Amazoness Pet Tiger !” The beast materialized with a loud roar, its attack points going up to 2100. The Amazoness Trainee gently petted it on the head. “Take it down!” The Amazoness Trainee jumped and delivered a swift axe kick to the Giant Orc’s head. Its eyes went blank and it fell on its face, disappearing. Dark Reaper sent the Giant Orc card back to the bottom of his deck. Applejack followed with the attack of her Amazoness Pet Tiger. It jumped and slashed Dark Reaper across the chest, taking his life points down to 1900. She declared. “I’m done here!”
We watched the duel attentively. The attack points of the Amazoness Trainee had gone up to 2600 after destroying the Giant Orc, and with the Amazoness Village in play, Applejack had quickly taken the lead. Still, something seemed amiss. Dark Reaper played very defensively on the previous game, but now he was the complete opposite. Rainbow Dash crossed both arms over her chest. “Damn it, I can’t believe I lost to that guy!”
Dark Reaper took a couple of breaths to recover. “My turn! Draw!” He quickly played his newest card. “Pot of Greed!” He drew two cards and smiled triumphantly. “Nightmare Steelcage!” The large, rounded cage appeared above Applejack and her monsters. “Now…” Dark Reaper set a second card, activated Ectoplasmer and summoned Killer Doll of Malice. Applejack shook her head. “You really are a one trick pony, aren’t you?” Dark Reaper grinned widely. “You’re about to experience the true terror of this combo!” He pointed with his finger. “Turn end!” The wicked spirit emerged from inside the doll and lunged at Applejack like a wild animal. She stiffened and shrugged the damage, much to our awe. Applejack opened her mouth and was about to say something when, suddenly, she let out a cry of pain. Her legs wobbled. “W-What the…” She yelled. “These things are squeezin’ mah’ legs!”
Dark Reaper exclaimed. “Bingo! Every time you take damage, those collars will tighten their grip, until…” He lifted a hand and clenched it, making a squeezing sound with his mouth. The audience cheered. My jaw fell. What the hell? Spike’s eyes widened in shock. Rarity gasped. Twilight and Rainbow Dash immediately stood up to protest. The announcer raised both hands placatingly. “Easy there, girls! Nobody’s forcing her to play, alright?” He turned to Applejack. “As a challenger, she’s free to give up and leave anytime she wants.”
I growled. “Son of a bitch! Now I get it!” Spike asked. “What do you mean?” I explained. “The Giant Virus in attack position and then the Giant Orc; he wanted to damage her life points as soon as possible. I bet he wants to intimidate her and make her lose her concentration.” Spike exclaimed. “What a cheap move!” Rarity cried. “We have to get her out of that cage!” Twilight bit her lip hesitantly. Rainbow Dash shouted. “Applejack!”
Applejack looked at us, tipped her hat and nodded. Rainbow Dash said cheerfully. “That’s what I’m talking about!” Applejack turned to glare at Dark Reaper. She declared firmly. “I ain’t done yet! Draw!” She looked at her newest card and smirked. “Cyclone !” The Nightmare Steelcage disappeared in the blink of an eye. Applejack summoned Amazoness Chain Master . The attack of the Pet Tiger increased to 2500. She decided to seize the opportunity. “Time to buck this tree down!”
Dark Reaper extended his hand. “Hold it!” He pointed at his two set cards. “I’ve got Magic Cylinder and Dimension Wall here.” He smiled smugly. “You know what they do, don’t you? Are you sure you want to attack?” A bluff? Applejack narrowed her eyes. “Really now.” She pointed her finger. “Amazoness Chain Master! Chain Strike!” The amazon twirled her chain and launched it straight at Dark Reaper. He laughed. “Dimension Wall! Don’t say I didn’t warn you!” The space in front of him warped, creating a hole where the tip of the chain disappeared, emerging right behind Applejack and hitting her for the full 1700 points of damage. She stumbled forwards, gritting her teeth in pain as the collars around her legs squeezed harder. Dark Reaper smirked. “Wanna try again?”
Spike suggested. “I-It could still be a bluff…” Rainbow Dash growled. “Damnit! If she attacked now he would be toast!” Rarity shook her head rapidly. “But if he’s saying the truth, then Applejack will…” Twilight bit her thumb and kept watching without saying a word.
Applejack breathed heavily. She glanced between her monsters; Dark Reaper’s set card and the cards in her hands. With a sigh, she declared. “Ah’ end mah’ turn.” The soul of the Amazoness Chain master abandoned her body to strike Dark Reaper. He laughed. “Spell of a Pained Soul !” The attacking spirit swerved and turned to Applejack, the damage knocking her down on her ass and taking her life points down to 750. The crowd roared. The announcer joked. “And this is why they say the best lies have a bit of truth in them!”
Dark Reaper calmly drew a card. The Killer Doll returned to his side of the field. He asked, in the same tone a parent would use with a child. “Well? What’s going to be?” He tilted. “If you want to give up just go ahead and said so.” Somebody in the crowd yelled at Applejack to give up. Soon, more and more people joined until it seemed the whole crowd was chanting those words.
Applejack looked at her deck. She clenched her teeth and, after what felt like an eternity, let out a sigh of defeat. “Ah’ give up.” The cards on the field vanished as the crowd roared. Applejack yelled. “Somebody get these cornsarned things outta mah’ legs!” The same burly man from before took away the collars, allowing her to step out of the cage. The announcer declared. “That’s the second victory in a row for our Death’s Ambassador! Hope you have a nice walk home, Thunder Thighs!” Applejack walked back to us slowly, like a person whose legs had fell asleep, while ignoring the laughs from the crowd. She slumped on the bench, took a deep breath and yelled. “SHIT!” We flinched. Applejack said softly. “Sorry, everybody. Ah’ couldn’t get us a win.”
Rarity shook her head and said consolingly. “It’s not your fault, darling. Nobody expected them to use such underhanded tactics.” Rainbow Dash added. “Yeah, even I would have some trouble with those things on my legs!” Applejack massaged her legs. “Yeah.”
Spike exclaimed angrily. “They were practically cheating!” Twilight adjusted her glasses. “It’s a mind game.” She explained. “The pain from the devices breaks your concentration, makes your more susceptible to make misplays and fall for their bluffs. Not only that, but by giving the option of surrendering anytime, they avoid the “cornered animal” effect.” Spike nodded. I put my clenched fist over my mouth and looked at the cage, where the announcer was randomly picking another paper to decide who of us would play now. I thought about Applejack, the collars squeezing her legs and the crowd yelling at her to give up; she must have felt as if the whole world was against her. I gritted my teeth. Would I be able to hold my own when the time comes?
Applejack’s voice broke me off my thoughts. “Hey, Joe!” She grinned. “Ain’t you goin’ to hold my hand?” I smiled and said as casually as I could. “Well, I was thinking more about giving you a leg massage.” She laughed. Guess that’s one way to lift the mood. Just then, Spike pointed out. “The announcer guy is going to read a name!”
Sure enough, he lifted a finger and called loudly. “Lady Diamond!” Rarity smiled and stood up unprompted. Admittedly, it wasn’t a difficult guess. Spike asked worriedly. “A-Are you sure, Rarity? I could take your place, if you want!” She tenderly patted him in the head. “Thank you, Spikey-Wikey, but I can handle this.” We wished Rarity good luck and she made her way into the cage, drawing plenty of wolf-whistles in the process. Spike stood up on the bench and glared around, trying to look as intimidating as possible. Unfortunately, the people in the audience weren’t impressed with by a kid with fangs and slit pupils, so he ended up drawing just a few chuckles here and there. I smiled sympathetically. Spike sat down back with a huff.
Rarity took her place in the cage, activated her Duel Disk dramatically and declared. “I’m ready.”
The announcer nodded and motioned for one of the burly dudes to approach. Much to our surprise, however, the man had brought a different device. It was black metal harness with a contraption consisting of two masks aligned at the height of the user’s head. Rarity looked at the device with shock and repulsion. “W-What is that thing?” The announcer smirked. “Why, you didn’t think we would use the same toys all the time, did you?” The audience cheered. “This, Miss Lady Diamond, is our little Venus Flytrap.” He explained. “Every time you take damage, the device will close a bit, and once your life points reach zero…” He slapped his hands together, making Rarity flinch. “But don’t worry!” He assured cheerfully. “The nails on the inside are too short to cause fatal damage! And on the bright side, you’ll have a damn fine costume for Nightmare Night!” Several people in the audience laughed.
I glanced at my side. To say Applejack, Rainbow Dash and Spike were fuming would be an understatement. Even Twilight, who had proposed this approach in first place to avoid violence, looked ready to bash some heads. Me? I would be lying if I said I wasn’t worried, but this was Rarity we were talking about. She was a tough cookie. Besides, I wanted to see what kind of cards and strategies she used.
The announcer quirked an eyebrow. “Well?” Rarity calmly held her hair aside, allowing the burly man to put the device around her neck. The announcer declared. “It’s time to d-d-duel!” Both players’ life points flashed above them at 4000 each.
Dark Reaper smiled sinisterly. “When I’m done with you, there won’t be enough makeup in the whole world to hide your face.” He drew his initial hand of six, summoning Killer Doll of Malice and activating Ectoplasmer, followed by Nightmare Steelcage. Rainbow Dash protested. “How many times is he going to play the same damn cards?” Dark Reaper snapped his fingers. “Turn end!” The effect of Ectoplasmer activated, sacrificing the killer doll to inflict 800 points of damage to Rarity. The contraption around her head closed slightly. Spike called her name worriedly, but Rarity showed no fear. Dark Reaper smirked. “Just remember to yell if you want to stop and get off!”
Rarity let out a loud “hmph”. She declared. “Your petty tricks will not work!” Dark Reaper snorted. “Really now? Petty tricks? Give me a break, Grandma!” Rarity’s left eye twitched slightly. I gulped. It was like the distant thunder signaling the coming of the storm. She drew her six cards swiftly and activated Angel's Charity , drawing three cards and discarding two. She examined her new hand carefully, set a single card and finished her turn.
Dark Reaper drew a card. The Killer Doll of Malice returned to the field. He played a monster face-down, set a card and finished his turn. “I am the Master of Death!” Rarity reeled backwards from the attack, her life points going down to 2400. We watched nervously as the contraption closed nearly to half around her head.
Rarity drew a card and said calmly. “You are nothing but a ruffian without the slightest taste in fashion.” She slid a card in her Duel Disk. "Harpie's Feather Duster! " Dark Reaper's backrow was wiped out in a gale of green feathers, much to his shock.
Spike pumped his fist. “Yes!” Applejack chuckled. “Look at that! She cleaned all his spells and traps!” Rainbow Dash shouted. “Serves you right, Dork Reaper!”
Rarity snapped her fingers, revealing her set card. “Hysteric Party !” My eyes widened in surprise. A Harpie deck! She discarded a card and lifted her right hand, calling dramatically. “Come, Sisters of the Wind!” A fierce whirlwind whipped up around Rarity, enveloping the whole cage and making everybody around shield their faces. “Aello , Ocypete and Celaeno ! My Harpie Ladies!” The wind subsided. We stared in awe at the three buxom, scantily-clad harpies surrounding Rarity. They had green feathery wings for arms and large talons with claws that looked like they could disembowel a horse with minimal effort. Yet these animalistic traits did little to diminish their beauty. Rarity crossed her arms daintily. The Harpy Lady #1 embraced her around the neck from the right, while the Harpy Lady #2 did the same around the waist from the left. Finally, the Harpy Lady #3 embraced Rarity’s legs from the right. You know, if it wasn’t from our circumstances, I’m pretty sure my mind would be going places right now.
I commented. “He’s still got a face-down monster.” Twilight assured me. “Don’t worry, Joe. Knowing Rarity, I bet she has the right card in her hand to deal with that.”
Sure enough, Rarity summoned Harpie's Pet Baby Dragon . The three harpies immediately surrounded the cute, little dragon with big round eyes, petting and cooing over it. Spike giggled at the scene. Rarity explained. “With three Harpies under my control, my Pet Baby Dragon gains the ability to destroy a card on your field.” Dark Reaper cringed. The Harpy Lady #1 pointed at his face-down monster and gave the baby dragon an encouraging pat on the back of the head. The Pet Baby Dragon took a deep breath and spit a fireball that incinerated the face-down monster. “Now dance for me, my harpies! A dance of victory!”
Dark Reaper raised both hands. “Wait, wait! I—uh—I’m sorry I called you grandma!” Rarity put a hand over her ear. She said with a raspy voice. “I’m afraid I can’t hear you, dear!”
It happened too fast. The three harpies lunged at the terrified Dark Reaper simultaneously, striking with their talons from all directions, shredding his clothing and slicing his hair locks cleanly. His life points went down to zero. The announcer looked at the passed out Dark Reaper and declared baffled. “The winner is Lady Diamond…”
The monsters vanished from the field and the contraption around Rarity’s neck went back to its initial position. She let out a small breath of relief and patted her hair tentatively. We cheered loudly over the groans and mutters of protest from the rest of the audience. Now the score was even and the real battle began.
