Author's Note

So, this chapter has been a work in progress for a very long time. I tried to make this chapter as best as I could. Anyway, I put alot of work into this, so I hope you like it. And before you ask, I have no idea why some of this is in bold. If you know how to fix it , don't be afraid to let me know in he comments.

Escape from Nowhere

Escape from Nowhere

The Last of the Soul Crusaders

Chapter 3

Dreams suck. Bad dreams suck even more. I had one last night, obviously. In it, Rainbow and I were approaching Celestia’s throne room. As we entered the antechamber, I saw Twilight blocking our path to the throne room.

“There’s no way in Tartarus you are getting past me!” She yelled. She was clad in much more armor than our encounter in the bar.

“After all she’s done, you’re really still with Celestia?” Rainbow cried.

“Celestia will crush you beneath her hoof, better that you die here, to spare you the pain of her anger.” Twilight screeched, her eyes were empty, devoid of all color.

“Do you even know what she’s done? Or are you just another worthless drone in her legion. A legion that my father helped to build. THE SAME PONY THAT SHE KILLED IN COLD BLOOD!” I screamed, all the anger and hate I held in over the last thirteen years instantly vented. I bolted towards her, my coltanas shining like the sun. That really should have been my cue to duck. I was blown backwards, my back hit the wall behind me. My vision was reduced to a tunnel of darkness. Rainbow continued to charge Twilight. The next three minutes passed in flashes of my vision. In each one, Twilight and Rainbow were engaged in a violent hoof fight. Flash after flash, I drew closer, I was dragging myself towards the fight. Then one flash showed Twilight walking towards me, all I could see of Rainbow was a lifeless corpse. Twilight lifted me off the ground, a haze of purple energy surrounded me.

“Your turn!” Her voice was cold as steel and hard as granite. Every muscle in my body tried to muster the strength to repel her attack. But to no avail. The knife plunged into my heart and with it a sense of failure.

I woke up, with a start, to Rainbow trying to chop down a tree.

“What are you doing?” I asked.

“Seeing as how you wanted to sleep in and I wanted to get the hell out of here, I decided to start building the raft we need to get to Horseshoe Bay.” She replied.

“And you're going to do that how?”

“Ugh, I am going to cut down some trees and lash them together with vines. Since you're awake, go find some oars and vines for me.” I chuckled,

“Yes, Your Highness.” Rainbow threw a piece of bark at me.

“Just go get them, smart-ass!” I got up started to walk towards the forest when an idea popped up into my head. I stopped and took a long stretch, took a few steps, groaned, took a few more steps, coughed. I looked at Rainbow. She wore an inpatient look on her face. “Hurry... the fuck... up.” she said, clearly holding back the urge to hit me. I batted my eyes at her.

“Angry, mistress Rainbow?” I asked with a playful tone to my voice. She slowly walked up to me. She stopped right in front of my face and narrowed her eyes. I am not afraid to admit, I did not mind her being that close to me.

“If you don’t get those oars and vines, I will shove this tree so far up your ass, you’ll be pissing sap for a year.” She growled. I decided to fuck with her on this.

“I already do, pumpkin.” I quipped and trotted away. I could feel her shocked expression a mile away. Collecting logs and vines reminded me of the farm my father owned. Yes, yes, yes, typical lonely hero was raised on a farm, whatever, I didn’t choose it. (Yell at Osiris, not me!) For whatever reason I missed the farm where Celestia slit my father's throat and ordered the guards to “have their way” with my mother. Needless to say that she didn’t walk away from that. She wasn’t even a Crusader. She didn’t deserve that fate.

By the time I got back to our camp I had a nice armful of logs and vines, just as the Maîtresse insisted. Ah, look at me speaking fancy. Rainbow had just felled the tree and dragged in line with three others she had cut down. I was impressed. I left not half an hour ago, she had only one tree down then. She knew her way around hard labor, what I was still trying to figure out is why that turned me on. Apparently, I wasn’t very good at hiding that.

“My god.” I mumbled. I was mortified when I realized she heard me.

“What did you say?” She asked, confused. I felt my eyes grow tenfold.

“Absolutely not, I did not say anything at all.” I droned.

“No, I’m pretty sure you-”

“NoIdidn’tsaythat. Hey,howaboutwegettoworkgettingoutofthisforest?” I blurted out, trying to change the subject. I quickly started lashing the logs together and carving out the oars. I did all of this while trying drastically to not make eye contact with Rainbow.

“Look, if you’re tired then just let me take over!” She groaned.

“Uhh, what?” I asked.

“You complained back there, you said ‘my god’ like you were all tired.”

“Oh yeah, I am tired but I’ll be fine.” Thank god she misinterpreted that. I have got to get better at hiding things. I’ve been doing it for thirteen years. Why did Rainbow have to make it so hard. Wait, that sound better in my head.

Moving on, our little naval catastrophe was about ready. Now to see if it was halfway sea-worthy. I dropped the raft, aptly named The Rainboom, into the river that would take us to Horseshoe Bay.

“I guess it’s almost ready, question is, are you?” I asked.

“What do you mean?” Rainbow asked.

“Do you really think you’re ready to fight your best friends?”

“They’re ready to fight me, so I guess I have to be ready to fight them.”

“You know, if I had any choice, you wouldn’t be involved in this.”

“What, you don’t like me?”

“No, I just don’t like putting you in danger. A timberwolf almost killed you yesterday. It’s obvious I can’t protect you.” Rainbow walked up to me, she put her hoof under my chin.

“I know that there is no pony better suited to take care of me. If I didn’t appreciate your company, trust me, I wouldn’t even still be here.”

“Sure, I guess you’re right.” I looked at The Rainboom, “We need to get this thing down river. Celestia will eventually send troops into the forest.” I grabbed the oars and Rainbow sat at the forward end. As we drifted down the river, I kept a close eye on both bank of the river. I was narrow enough for timberwolves to board, yet wide enough for archers or unicorns to tear us apart. My suspicions were about to be confirmed. Directly to my port bow, a bolt of magic was launched into the sky. Then, all Tartarus broke out. Arrows rained down, some were ablaze with magical fire. Archers emerged from the treeline on both sides of the river, arrows ready. I managed to deflect some of the arrows back at the archers.

“They’ve blocked the river.” Rainbow yelled. I looked downriver. Archers were felling trees in our path. I needed to move the trees, then cripple their firepower if we were going to survive this. I jumped ashore. I advanced towards the trees downriver, killing archer after archer on the way. Some of them managed to get some hits on me, but nothing serious. I managed to get to the logs. I needed to move them, without using magic, and before The Rainboom rammed into them. They were lodged between the banks of the river, The Rainboom would capsize if it made contact. I grabbed a bow off the ground and wedged in between the ground and the edge of the log. I was going to use the bow as a wedge to shove the log out of position. I pulled and pulled on the bow. My hooves were screaming in agony. I never thought I’d come free, but eventually the log broke free of the mud and freely floated down the river. The Rainboom was safe, now to take down all of these archers. I raced downriver to try to board The Rainboom. I was parallel to the raft when I saw Rainbow steering towards me.

“Come on, just jump!” She yelled. Against every instinct in my body, I leapt towards the raft. I landed on my shoulder and very nearly broke it.

“Get us out of here!!” I heard Rainbow shriek. I was hesitant to use magic until now. And now seemed the best time to use it. I launched a shockwave in every direction, shielding Rainbow of course, knocking down every archer within a mile. The archers would no longer trouble us. I scrambled to the aft end and dipped my hoof into the water. I used an acceleration spell and advanced the flow of the river. Soon we were out of the haze of arrows and drawing closer to Horseshoe Bay. Arrows littered the deck of The Rainboom.

The next day or so, passed without incident. We meandered down the river without much conversation. Then we were graced with a magnificent sight. Horseshoe Bay, teeming with ships and ponies of all sorts. One of these ships would surely get us to Manehattan, voluntarily or not. I spotted a particular ship I liked, a Stallion O’ War. I counted one hundred and sixty guns, eighty per side. Her crew had to be over eight hundred strong. Commandeering it would be difficult. I beached and dismantled The Rainboom. Rainbow and I walked around the dock, picking out ships that could serve our purpose. The ship I liked proved to be the best for our task. And best of all, she wasn’t even christened yet.

I trotted up to the captain of the vessel.

“How much to charter for Manehattan?” I asked, a slight accent in my voice to make me sound the part. The captain gave a hearty laugh.

“More than you’ve got fella, this here is the finest vessel ever to grace Equestrian waters. But, you are in luck. We’re headed to Manehattan as our maiden voyage. If you’d the crew, you’d get a free trip to the Big Apple. Can I count you and yer lady friend in?” I looked at Rainbow and made me decision.

“No that won’t be necessary” I mumbled. I got close to him and kicked him in the chest, knocking the wind out of him and tossing him into the bay. I grabbed his jacket and hat as he fell. I put them on and looked around. Nopony noticed. I trotted up to Rainbow, who was trying to haggle a few apples off of a merchant. I kissed her, straight on the lips. It was part careful plan, part gambit so that I could actually kiss her and get away with it. I looked at her and said.

“Come on las’, let’s get you to my ship.” I said. I put my hoof around her shoulder and lead her towards my newly acquired Stallion O’ War.

“What the fuck was that?” Rainbow whispered. From what I could hear, she wasn’t angry, just confused. A part of me leapt with joy.

“Just a clever ploy. Nothing more.” I said. Of course, I didn’t mean it.

“Oh… ok” She said, she sounded sad. We walked up the plank towards the ship. Some of the sailors looked at me with confused expressions.

“Where’s my first mate?” I yelled.

“Here Cap’n!” I heard a rough voice reply.

“Meat me in my quarters!” I yelled back.

“Aye Cap’n!” I looked at Rainbow.

“You’re coming too.” We entered my new quarters. It was dark, yet oddly cozy. A map of Equestria was spread on a table in the corner. My first mate was there too. He looked at me, obviously confused at the change in crew.

“Cap’n?” He asked.

“There’s been a change of plan. I was a close friend of the former captain. He told me that Celestia’s gone mad. He told me to lead this ship to Manehattan.”

“Wait, Cap’n. You said was?”

“Aye, he’s dead, Celestia’s guards killed him for ‘insubordination and madness’.”

“Blasphemy! Cap’n Garrick was nothing but the sanest of ponies! What shall we do now, Cap’n?”

“This vessel can’t bombard Canterlot from the coast, but we can bombard Manehattan…”

“Are ya thinkin what I’m thinkin Cap’n?”

“Aye, I reckon I am. Set course for Manehattan. We’ve got a world to save.”