Hi! I'm Pinkie.

Can you keep a secret?

I represent the Element of Laughter, and boy do I love it. I laugh...a lot. But dont worry. Im not laughing at you. At least not yet.

Enough of that, lets begin.

I'll make it a story. You better enjoy. Ha ha.

I open the door. A pretty pink door at the front of Sugarcube Corner. It's Rarity. I smile...meniacingly. I lead the product of Rarity's work indoors and offer her some food. She frowns with what she has left of her mouth.

"Whoops," I giggle. "Forgot about your... you know,"
She makes a gurgle with her mouth and twitches her ear impatiently.
I smile and cheerily say, "I guess I have to feed you then, dont I."

I take her by the leash tied round her neck and lead her to my kitchen. On the table, set in neat piles, are notebooks upon notebooks filled with ingredients gathered by myself and Gummy. Oh Gummy, you were a loyal one. Sorry it had to end this way. You tasted good.

I seated the pony on a cushion and prepare her tube for food. Removing a cork stopper, I pour in a green smoothie I had prepared earlier, into the opening of the large rubber tube. Watching the pony cluelessly twitch her ears and tap her hoof I unlatch a door to the cellar. This is where I keep my tools.

Noises waft through the air, making the room feel occupied by a ballroom filled with ponies. The mare begins to breathe faster and louder, making whimpering noises in the process. "Dont be scared," I say happily. "You are not going down there... Yet." I laugh and jump at the thought of my midnight activity.

She jumps up and begins to quiver, Beginning to bolt to the direction of the front door.I had never seen a pony do that before. I run after her and buck her away from the door. She moans in pain and begins to plead with me with muffled words. I dont care, Dragging her by the ear I bring her to my cellar and begin to lecture her on the rights of a feeble minded pony such as her.

"You messed up real bad this time, girlo." I giggle "You cant leave yet, the fun has just begun!" I tie her to the wall with chains and staple her ears shut to prevent her from hearing what I say next.

"Now, mares and colts," I announce to my audience. "Today I shall be demonstrating what happens to a pony who does not abide by my rules!"

The audience laugh and talk amongst themselves. I turn on the stage lights I had set up earlier and examine the audience. In the front row I clearly see my fellow element holders. In the second row, some griffins. In the third some animals. And beyond that, i make out Zecora and the Timber Wolves. In the final row sits discord and his friend Lord Tirek.

"Time to party!" The crowd bellows.

I walk over to the pony and remove the staples on her ears.
"Time to shine" I whisper.

I walk back and take a breath. I begin. I kick her head. She creates a muffled scream and the crowd cheers on. I repeat this until I hear her skull crack and her brains fall all over the floor. The blood gushes from her head and creates a large pool of blood on the ground. I laugh. And Laugh. And laugh. I cant stop. Everyone joins in. I watch through my tears as the remains of the ponies head litter the floor and stain the wall.

I walk off stage to take a breath and get some refreshments for the audience before I continue. I take some cookies and milk and pass them out to the crowd.

Returning to the stage I fumble in a closet near the pony and retrieve a large chain saw. Starting up the chainsaw I glance at the crowd, Still laughing and making kind remarks about my work.

I sawed off the last of the stump that held the head. Putting down the saw I fumbled in the closet once again but this time looking for a knife.

The ponies body was now limp and was no longer breathing. I took the knife and began cutting the stomach of the pony revealing her insides. I placed a jar beneath her rectum and begun forcing all her excrements into the jar.

This will make a great chocolate cake. I thought.

I continued by draining her bladder into another jar, I was going to make lemonade out of that later on.

Once I completed the task I continued by removing the rest of the internal organs. I laughed and laughed but the audience did not. The fun had ended. I scuttled over to my machine and set the needle to the start. Once again the audience began to talk and laugh again.

I ran to the stage and picked up the chainsaw. Sawing the legs off was next. This was my favourite part.

I took the limbs out of the chains. Taking all of my treasures, I went off to the kitchen to begin cooking my famous goodies, only this time they would taste better than ever. Before I left I took a look at my still laughing audience. They sat there, as still as ever. My dear plushies. I would see them again next week.

At the cook off the next day I won 1st prize. My voice was all over the intercom...

"Hi! I'm Pinkie!"

HA HA HA HE HE HA HA HE HA HE HAAA HEEE HAAAAA

Author's Note

Proofread and Edited by rainbowspirals