Not Your Typical Monster

     I arrived at the town, Ponyville. The name itself makes me retch. As I entered the town my mind decided to tell me that my *cough cough* naughty bits were hanging out. Oh, how wonderful, I hope it's a social norm.

     "Hello! I'm Pinkie Pie..." I ignored the rest because I was more focused on where this pink beast came from. I reentered the conversation at, "What's your name!"

     "My name is Viral Anomaly. Would you kindly move your ass, I'm kinda not in the mood?!" I yelled, the days events finally taking over.

     She sniffled, then she bounced back to happy over-coked mode.

     "Somepony is grumpy, I guess I better make your party extremely awesome!" The only reason I understood her was because of the virus because she talked a mile a minute.

     I just ignored her and began to look around town, ready to gouge my eyes out with a teaspoon due to the color. Key word teaspoon, an average spoon is too pointy. I then heard a sound that surprised me, the sound of something flying really fast accompanied by a loud bang.

     I jumped onto the roof of the house next to me, ignoring the awe struck faces in the streets, and began to sprint to where it landed. The tree it landed had windows and a balcony, one such window sporting an abnormal hole. Everything was a blur (being able to sprint at 90mph tends to do that) and arrived at the tree.

     The sign by the door labels this place as a library, perfect. I jumped from my perch, almost crushing an orange pony with a cowboy hat and no wings or horn: earth pony. She jumped scared of the loud thump next to her.

     "Sorry ma'am." I said, it's better to make a good image than a poor one. She nodded, then looked down, noticing the crater at my feet. "Sorry about that, I need to lose a few pounds I guess."

     I started walking towards the door and she followed, fuck she must be suspicious.

     "What's yer name colt?" She asked with a stereotypical southern accent.

     "Viral Anomaly, yours?"

     "Ahm Applejack, ya ever heard of Sweet Apple Acres?"

     I searched the memories and found it. "Yep, you work there?" I asked.

     "Ah basically run it. Say, what are ya getting here?" She waved here hoof towards the library that was quickly getting closer.

     "I am looking at books about flight and history books. You?" I remembered the name of this country, Equestria*retch*.

     "Are ya alright?" She asked. Fuck I actually retched.

     "Yep, just a slight hangover, a little going away party from home." I hope this doesn't bite me in the ass later.

     "OK, don't throw up on Twilight's books, she'll go bonkers."

     "OK"

     "To answer your question, I'm checkin on ma friend Rainbow Dash, she crashed into the darn place agin."

     She opened the door, and I was instantly met with a blue blur to the face.