As the shop sat in silence, the two occupants slumbered. Peaceful smiles on their faces as the world around them didn't matter.

That was before a shrill chiming woke them. Jumping from the seat, he launched the now screaming mare a cross the room. "W-What's the haps?" He mumbled, his voice groggy and slurred. "The fuck is that noise?"

Getting up from the floor, the mare groaned. "What was that for?" She asked. Her pink mane poking out at various angles.

Looking down at the desk in front of him, he spotted the source of the noise. Something that wasn't there before he had gone to sleep. A rotary pone. Listening to it chime for another minute, he reached a hand as he lifted the receiver from its cradle. Bringing it up to his ear, he spoke. "Hello? This is... This is a shop with trinkets, how can I help?"

"Yes hello, is this Barry?" The voice was sharp, almost sending the phone on a fritz as it whined. He held it away from his head. Trying not to go deaf.

"Who?" He asked. An eyebrow raised.

"Barry, is this the human named Barry?"

"You've got the human part right, but I don't know anybody named Barry."

"Well whatever your name is. I'm your boss."

"Cool. What do you need boss?"

There was a moment of silence on the other end of the line as the person. His eyes were drawn to the mare as she trotted towards him, stopping to move a hoof to her mane, trying to fix the bed head she had received laying on the human.

"Didn't you say your name was Barry before you fell asleep?"

He shrugged. "It really isn't though, ever since I ended up here I've never found out what my name was."

The voice on the other end of the line coughed, catching his attention. Putting the phone back up to his ear, he spoke. "Yeah?"

"So that's it? You're not going to ask any questions?"

"Yeah, what do you need me to do?"

"What if I was the one who brought you here?"

"Couldn't care any less than I already do. I've been here for years, even if I did find out where I came from, what good would that do?" He shook his head and sighed. "It'd only make me want to know what home was like. I would want to find out why I was picked and not someone else."

"You've thought about this before haven't you?" The mare asked.

He let the hand that held the phone drop to his side. The curled wire that connected the receiver to the rest of the phone dangled by his knee. "I've had enough time in Equestria to think about what I want in life. Trying to find out where I came from and why I was here would be the biggest waste of my time."

"Truly?" The phone asked. The voice on the other end different this time. Instead of a near shriek, it was soothing and sounded as if the one on the other end was a singer.

"I guess. I have a roof over my head, clothes on my back, and food to eat. Admittedly, I wish I could afford more than one pair of clothes, but I got use to wearing the same thing ever day."

The mare's face blanched in disgust. "I don't even wear clothes and that just sounds disgusting."

He shrugged. "I have a spell that can clean them." He hummed. "So what did you call for, boss?"

"I wanted to tell you that we're moving. And by we and mean you and the mare."

"Whoa whoa whoa, what do you mean move?"

"And why am I being moved as well?"

The phone chimed. "Why? Because it's time to hit a new group of ponies. The rich are careless with who they hurt. The feelings they feel can be a good thing, but they took it to far. Tainted the meaning. And it's time to give them a reminder of who they are."

"Alright." He muttered, unsure of what to think. "You said I'm taking..." He turned his head to look at the mare before him. "I don't even know your name."

She smiled. "Bored. Bored Core."

"Aren't you the life of the party," he mocked.

"Not like that," she laughed. "I used to be a digger back on a rock farm."

"Rock farm? Let me guess, they farm rocks."

She nodded in reply.

"So I'm taking Bored with me, why is that?"

"In all the time you've worked for me, she's the first one you haven't even tried to make an offer to. I thought that was interesting." The voice said simply. "I thought that she'd be the first friend you could ever make in this line of work. For the first time, you actually ended up owing someone something."

"So? It was just bag of Bits." His upper lip twitched.

"A bag of Bits is just as powerful as a favor. You'd know what Bits can do to a person. With enough money, you could tell Celestia herself to lick the bottom of your shoe."

He laughed. "Oh, no amount of money can corrupt someone who's seen the evils of greed first hand. You can wave that bag of Bits all you want, she'd never bend."

"You've seen what money can do, does that mean you'd never bend?" The voice's laughter chimed like bells swinging in the wind. "Don't answer that. I already know since I am the one paying you after all."

"There's a difference–"

"Is there?"

The room fell silent as he sneered at the phone. The muscles in his jaw writhed under his skin as he ground his teeth.

"Both you, and Bored here will be moving into a small mansion in Canterlot. You'll have to lay low after every favor you collect. The nobles love their gossip. And if word gets out, you'll have the Royal Guard crashing down your door."

"But you pay me after every favor, how am I supposed to get enough Bits to get stuff like food? I could barely feed myself, let alone another."

Humming was heard from the phone. "Think of this as a raise. You've lived the life of a beggar, wandering around and scraping the bottom of the barrel as the world moved on without you. This little shop here was a step up. You could live somewhat comfortably, but you had to work for it." A sigh. "Once you get to Canterlot. Have some fun. I think you said something along the lines of, Be happy for the both of us."

"That was just something I said to make a sale." He said, a smile stretching across his face.

"That was said after you gave her the necklace."

He had no reply.

"There are those who say the original of something can't be an imitation. But I say the original is the ultimate fake."

"What kind of fucking drugs are you on?"

The phone clicked as the person on the other end hung up.

"Well that's great. I got a raise." He said, slamming the phone onto the table a moment later. When plastic met wood, the phone shattered. "Fuck!" He yelled, his hands held the sides of his head.

"Isn't a raise good?" Bored asked, confused at his reaction.

"Good? No. Great? Hell yes. But do you know what Canterlot is like?"

She shook her head.

"Canterlot is a place where elitists fester and conglomerate. Me being what I am fucks me over because those little shits only buy from, and I quote, the best of the best." He said, his voice taking on a mocking tone as he pinched his nose for the last line. "Wait." He looked towards Bored. "That's why she wanted me to bring you. You're a pony, they'll buy stuff from you."

"Don't they trade with nobles from other races as well? I'm pretty sure you being you won't be a problem."

"From other nations? Yes, but once they leave and go back to their own country, those little fuckers talk all kinds of trash, there's a reason why most of Equestria's nobles aren't anything except ponies. Cause if you ain't a pony, you're just a filthy commoner." Moving around the desk, he ducked from view, rattling was heard as he rummaged through the desk.

"What are you doing?" Bored asked.

"Looking for a list."

"A list?"

"Yeah, a list. I think I told you that some of my customers run away?"

"You didn't." She said as she trotted over to where he was crouched. Jumping as he rose quickly holding up a notepad.

"Here we are. Well yeah, some don't like that they owe me something, and they end up running away."

"What do you do?"

"I find them."

"That's it?"

"That's all you need to know. Yes." He tossed the list onto the table.

Bored placed her hooves up on the table as she began to read it. It wasn't just a list of names like she thought it would be. The page that she read held information on a single pony. Height. Coat color. Mane color. It even had a crudely drawn picture of what the cutie mark looked like. The cutie mark she saw was a compass rose, the major directions on it were a golden yellow. While secondary points were a light purple.

Name: ???

Sex: Male.

Coat: ???

Mane: ???

Eyes: Blue.

Location: Unknown. But is most likely to be living in Canterlot if the accent and clothing were anything to go by.

Item: A Golden Credit Card

"This is really creepy, you know that?" She looked at him, her eyebrows furrowed.

"Okay?"

"Like, why do you even have this?"

"I don't take lightly to being stolen from."

She looked back at the list, flipping through the pages as she eyed the extensive writing. "I thought they ran away."

He nodded. "They can change names, change the color of their coats, even dye their manes. But the moment I see that cutie mark. I know it's them. There can be ones that are the same, just different colored, but that's something you can't change."

"What about makeup?"

He looked at her. "What?"

"Ponies can use makeup to change their cutie marks. Just cover them up and give themselves something else. Even with the accents thing, ponies can just get lessons and change them."

He didn't respond.

Looking over, Boring's eyes widened at the sight of the seething human, silently flailing his arms.

"Fine!" He screamed. "Fuck it! Forget the list!" His hands tugged on the hair atop his head. "Let's just go to Canterlot!"

She winced as the human brought a foot to the door, kicking it open and off of its hinges, throwing it into the streets of Manehattan. Ponies gathered and stared at the enraged human. They all hurried away as he stepped out of the shop.

"You're acting like a foal." She said, following him out the door. "So what they ran away. You've had ponies who didn't run away right?"

"It doesn't matter." He said gruffly.

"But–"

She froze as the human stopped and turned around, bending at the waist as he got at eye level with her. "Because of those ponies I've had days where I thought it'd be for the best if I just quit doing what I was doing and started robbing people. In my time of being here, I've thought about a lot of things. Never have I ever contemplated doing something like that. If I didn't want people to steal my shit, why would I want to steal someone else's stuff?" He sighed. "You ponies love to talk about peace. But in the end, you're just as human as me and I'm just as pony as you. We're greedy, we're selfish. The only difference is that you ponies don't come with in betweens. You're absolutes. A thief here can't feel remorse because he's destined to be a thief."

She shook her head. "That's not–"

He pointed at the cutie mark on her flank. A stone with lightning cracking it in half. "Absolutes. You are what you are. You can't just change that. Sure a thief can stop stealing. But the mark on his flank keeps him becoming good at anything else." He straightened his back out and turned around. "Those were the very same words I told someone when they tried to become something they could never be."

He began walking. His shoes dragging on the pavement with every step. She followed, keeping pace as her hooves clicked and clopped.

"He tried to stop stealing, not because he felt bad, but because it was getting dangerous for him. Ponies were wising up to how he did things. And he didn't want to spend the rest of his life rotting in prison." He smiled, chuckling as the memory played in his head. "The first time I met him, he was actually trying to steal stuff off the ropes in the shop. Saw him just dangling there, I think there was a golden inlaid scroll in his mouth. I asked him why he was trying to steal the scroll and not the jewelry."

"Why was he trying to steal the scroll?" Boring asked.

"Pretty sure it was because he thought the scroll would go for more. Unicorns apparently pay top Bits for enchanted stuff. Especially old enchanted stuff."

"Did you end up giving him something?" She wondered.

He nodded. "Not right then and there. I just told him to go before the guards were called. He came back when he heard rumors from his friends about me. They told him I could get him riches without needing to steal anymore. So he came to me. We made a deal, and that was that. I haven't called in my favor and he continues to struggle with the world of politics."

Bored smiled for a moment, before frowning and turning to look at him. "Wait, how does any of this connect with ponies running away or not?" She asked.

"The ponies who run away from the deals we make are trying to deny who they are. Just like I deny who I am when I pick the moral high ground in situations that'd benefit me to take the low road. I can say that I'm not greedy. I can think that I'm not selfish. But in the end, I'm only human. And I have wants and needs. Dreams and aspirations. By doing what I'm doing now, I'm denying my own happiness while allowing others to flourish. Letting them realize that the happiness they want doesn't come from material possessions. I'm the same as those ponies who ran away, wanting nothing but riches to my name. So I need to remind them of their place in this world."

"I still don't see how those two subjects connect."

He groaned. "In the end. I get what I want. But it's not what I need. The ponies who ran away are no different than the ones that stayed. In the end. They get what they need. But not what they want. It's all just a matter of time. And the ones who run away remind me of me, because I'm constantly running away from the glaring fact that I need to realize that I'm not special."

"So do you still think you're special?" Bored asked with a smile, trying to hold back laughter.

"Oh hell yes." He patted himself on the chest with a hand. "I'm the only human on this god-forsaken planet after all." He laughed. "Every planet should have at least one human on it. Or else who's going to show everyone what perfection looks like?"

"So what does that make me if you're so perfect?" She glared with feigned anger.

"A close second?" He shrugged before hissing as she kicked his ankle. "Little shit," he said as he hopped on one foot and held the other in his hand. "Last place for you." Placing his foot back down, he continued walking.

Beginning their journey to Canterlot with a laugh, the both of them walked the rest of the way to the train station in silence. Only to head back as he realized he forgot to pick up the Bits he had been payed.

"Don't you have to check in with your boss?" He asked as he entered his previous home. Walking into the darkness as he avoided the still hanging items.

"What are you talking about? I'm my own boss."

He shrugged. "Alright then."

Looking at the desk, he noticed the phone that had been there was gone now. Replaced by a heavy bag of Bits. Bigger than any of the previous bags he had received. A note hanging the string that tied it shut.

"Huh," he mumbled as he tore the note from the string, unfolding it before he read it. "Congratulations on the raise, Barry." He sighed. "Like hell I'm gonna be called Barry. I'd rather just be called something like Human." His eyes widened as the name on the paper, replaced by the very word he said he'd go by. "You cheeky little shit," he muttered. Only to groan as it changed again, glaring at the words before dropping the paper. Taking the bag in hand, he turned around and left the shop. Closing the door behind him, the shop was left in darkness as the world outside moved on. The items hanging on the ceiling disappeared one by one. Leaving nothing but the room itself and the paper the human had dropped.

Congratulations on the raise, Bitch.

Author's Note

Beginning of part two. Ask any questions you might have. Let me know what you think.