The mane six watches death battle.by deadmanx513ChaptersAkuma VS Shang tsung.(edited)Rogue VS Wonder Woman.Goomba VS Koopa.Haggar VS Zangief.Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles Battle RoyaleZitz VS LeonardoYoshi VS RiptorFelicia VS TaokakaKratos VS Spawn.Bomberman VS Dig Dug.Vegeta VS Shadow.Mario VS SonicLuke Skywalker VS Harry Potter.Chun-Li VS Mai Shiranui.Master Chief VS Doomguy.Eggman VS Wily.Zelda VS PeachThor VS Raiden.Link VS Cloud.Batman VS Spider-Man.Pikachu VS Blanka.Goku vs Superman.He-man vs. Lion-O.Shao Kahn vs. M. Bison.Ryu Hayabusa vs Strider Hiryu.Ivy vs Orchid.Terminator vs Robocop.Luigi VS Tails.Pokemon Battle royale.Fulgore vs SektorGodzilla VS Gamera.Batman VS Captain AmericaTigerzord VS Gundam EpyonRyu VS ScorpionDeadpool VS Deathstroke.Kirby VS Majin BuuRagna VS Sol Badguy.Gaara vs Toph.Boba Fett VS Samus Aran RemasteredprologueSamus Aran VS. Boba Fett.(edited)Starscream VS Rainbow Dash.Fox McCloud vs Bucky O'HareIron Man VS Lex Luthor. (Flash Notion version)Akuma VS Shang tsung.(edited)After the girls had collected their desired snacks and were able to convince Pinkie Pie that she didn’t need to grab every sweet that was in the kitchen and just grab a few of her favorite treats so the could make their way back to the ballroom. “So, what do you y’all think will happen in the next episode?” Applejack questioned, as they made their way down the hall. “I don’t really know for sure, but I bet it will have a bad guy in it!” Rainbow Dash claimed, puffing her chest out in pride. “Uh-huh...” muttered the farmer, as she gave her rainbow friend a flat look. “If I could be so bold to ask, but what gives you that idea?” questioned Rarity, with a raised brow. “Was it because of the preview?” Fluttershy asked, meekly. “Yup! Only a bad guy would say, you’re soul is mine!” explained the rainbow speedster, doing a poor imitation of the voice she made. The others nodded, finding her logic sounded. As they continued their way to the ballroom door, but stop when they heard not only Twilight and Spike's voice, but two others as well. Curious, they quickly opened the door and were surprised to see the two rulers of Equestria, Princess Celestia and Princess Luna, sitting with Twilight, and seem to be having a good chat if the small amount of laughter where anything to go by. “Oh! You guys finally made back.” smiled Twilight, as she waved her friends over. “Uh… yeah, we had to keep Pinkie Pie from taking every sweet from the kitchen and all that.” Applejack explained, with a sheepish look, ”Though if we knew the Princesses were coming over, we would’ve hurried up.” she clarified, as she and the rest of the group each picked a seat and sat down. “*chuckle* Do not fret, Applejack, we don’t mind waiting for our friend's.” chuckled Celestia. Celestia was also an Alicorn who has a white coat with a very slight pink tinge, purple eyes, and a flowing violet, azure, green and cyan translucent mane and tail. Her cutie mark was of the sun. “Our sister speak the truth, young Applejack! We shall always wait for our dearest friends as they take their time getting snacks!” proclaimed Princess Luna, proudly. Like her sister and Twilight, she is also an alicorn with a dark blue coat, teal eyes, and like her sister also had a translucent blue mane with a translucent blue border. Her cutie mark was of a crescent moon placed over a black background. “While that’s wonderful to hear Princess, but umm... if it’s ok to ask. Why are you here?” Fluttershy asked nervously, but a warm smile from Celestia help calm her nerves greatly. “It’s no problem, my little pony, and to answer your question, Luna and I wanted to see this show from another world.” the Sun Princess explained, causing most of the group to nod in agreement with her reasoning, but Rainbow Dash raised her hoof, “Yes, Rainbow Dash?” she asked. “Well, it’s cool and all that you two want to watch with us, but don’t you have like, day court and stuff?” questioned the blue mare, causing her friends to agree with that as well. “Don’t worry about that, I have my nephew, Blueblood looking after things for me,” Celestia said. “Now, let us desis with the chatter and watch a battle between two great warriors!” cheered Luna soon followed by everyone else. This was enough prompting for Twilight to start the next episode. PLAY. Interlude (*Cues: Invader - Jim Johnston*) Wiz: Street Fighter, Mortal Kombat. Kings of the fighting genre. And every good fighter needs awesome villains. Boomstick: Like Akuma, the ultimate badass of martial arts. Wiz: And Shang Tsung, the sorcerous vanguard of doom. “Seems you were right on this one, Dash.” Applejack slightly praised. “Heh, told you so.” bragged Rainbow, which earned her a few eye rolls from her friend’s. Boomstick: He's Wiz and I'm Boomstick. Wiz: And, it's our job to analyze their weapons, armor, and skills to find who would win a Death Battle. Akuma (*Cues: Street Fighter IV - Old Temple*) Wiz: Akuma, master of The Fist. Known as Gouki in Japan, he is a living weapon, ten times stronger than nearly every other Street Fighter. Boomstick: Plus, he looks friggin' awesome, I totally want me some red, glowing eyes. When an image of Akuma showed up, everypony had to do everything in their power to to not run and hide from the walking demon in human skin. The only ones not cowering where Celestia and Luna, both giving the walking killing machine either a stone cold look from Celestia and a worried and… nostalgic look from Luna? Wiz: Akuma has dozens of powerful special attacks including the Gou Hadoken. a powerful blast with precision control. He can even use the almighty Shinku-Hadoken, which is, basically, a giant fireball of death. Boomstick: Man, if I ever fire a Hadoken in real life, I'mma die happy. “That's quite impressive, even some of the top unicorns in canterlot have a hard time using elemental magic.” Twilight praised as she was awed by the fact that their are some creatures that have mastered elemental attacks that easily. “Awww yeah! Now that's a cool move!” cheered Rainbow Dash, along with Pinkie and Spike agreeing with her. Gou Hadoken Total Control Can Fire Multiple at Once (That impressed quite a few in the crowd.) Shinku-Hadoken Can be Charged Usable in Midair (Zanku Hadoken) Wiz: Akuma also uses the Shoryuken uppercut, a teleport ability, a swift multi-striking hurricane kick, and the Hyakkishu, A.K.A the Demon Flip. Special Moves And Attacks Gou Shoryuken "Dragonfist" (Spiked like that one.) "Air Slashing" Hurricane Kick (Rainbow Dash instantly fell in love with that move.) Teleport (That gained a few wide eye’s.) Hyakki Shuu "Demon Flip" (*Cues: Hideyuki Fukasawa - Volcanic Rim Orchestral*) Boomstick: Also, Akuma's got tons of different Super Arts, but two really stand out. First there's the "Kongo...Kokuretsu Za... how do you say that? Wiz: No idea. “Huh? I thought Wizzy would know that word?” questioned and confused Pinkie Pie, getting a few nods in agreement as everyone, even the Princesses looked over towards Twilight, who in return gave them a flat stare. “... What? Just because we're smart, doesn't mean we know every little thing.” snarked the Princess of friendship. Boomstick: Well, I'm pretty sure that's Japanese for ‘Fuck You Up!’ 'Cause basically, Akuma punches the ground and things explode. Announcer:K.O. Boomstick: He shattered a whole friggin' island just by punching it. Holy shit! “WHAT THE BUCK!” cursed Applejack, as the others gasp at the insane feat of strength, “Not even the strongest earth ponies could do that!” Wiz: But that's not the deadliest move up his nonexistent sleeve. (Akuma uses his deadly move against Dan Hibiki and his health depleted afterwards) The Shun Goku Satsu, also known as the Raging Demon, literally means "Instant Hell Murder." The ponies and one dragon could only stare in awe as they saw Akuma’s most powerful move and could only hope they are never on the receiving end of something like it. Boomstick: Man, I'm going to totally name my first kid that. The Raging Demon at full power is fatal, this guy's a freakin' onslaught of pain! Wiz: That's right, Boomstick. Akuma lives for one thing, and one thing only: fighting. He travels the world day and night searching for worthy opponents. He's an unstoppable human Holocaust, losing only once to his brother Gouken, but after a brutal rematch… They could only gasp in horror as they saw the aftermath of the two brothers battle. But Luna was the worst off as her vision started to get blurry as the image changing only so slightly. The only differences were that instead of Gouken laying in a bloody heap, it was instead her own sister Celestia, and the mark on the was was replaced by a blood red crescent moon. “It’s just like one of the plans I made when I was still Nightmare Moon.” panicked the Lunar Princess, as she was finding more and more in common with the walking apocalypse. She was also started to violently shake and break into a cold sweat as she imagined this happening if she was never stopped back then when she was, Nightmare moon. But, she soon felt the warm embrace of her sister’s wing wrap around her and when she looked up she saw her sister’s warm smile beam down at her. Feeling her with warmth and helped wash the dark memories away. Boomstick: Oh hey, look! He can fingerpaint! “Not funny!” growled out Rainbow Dash, while the others in the group settled with just glaring at the T.V. Wiz: It was rumored that Akuma sacrificed his soul to a demon in exchange for the strength to defeat Gouken, but this has been declared non-canon. “Um... that’s good I guess?” guessed Fluttershy, really not seeing it make much of a differences with how Akuma acts anyway. Luna just sighed in relief in the fact that it was at least one less thing they had in common. Boomstick: Akuma's got one major problem, though. His stamina is absolutely pathetic. He can dish out the pain, but he sure can't take it. “Figures. A ruffian can’t handle the same pain that he causes others with.” snarked Rarity, showing her displeasure with Akuma. Wiz: It's crucial for Akuma to have total control over the fight. He takes an extremely offensive approach. Always moving, always attacking. Boomstick: Yeah, screw defense! Give me more ways to hurt people! “Now that doesn't seem real smart if you ask me.” remarked Applejack, gaining a few nods in agreement. Akuma: I am Akuma, and I will teach you the meaning of pain! When the analyzing was over Twilight quickly pushed pause so everyone could discuss. After a quick discussion, the group agreed that while Akuma’s past was a dark one that each member had different reason to dislike, no one could deny his strength and skill. Seeing as the group was done talking, Twilight quickly hit play. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Shang Tsung (*Cues: The Temple (Classic) - Mortal Kombat Trilogy*) Wiz: Shang Tsung is the cunning sorcerer from Outworld, and scheming pawn of Shao Kahn. He's extremely adept in magic and a well-rounded fighter. “While we can respect a warrior who tries to be well balanced, it’s the whole scheming part that has us worried.” stated Luna, feeling like she was not going to object. Boomstick: This guy can shoot flaming skulls, which is totally awesome, but, where the heck does he keep them? I mean seriously, how many skulls can a person carry around with them? “Ugh! I rather not think about that.” gagged Spike. Already not liking this guy. Flaming Skulls Can attack in Rounds of One, Two, or Three Fire Damage Swift & Deadly Unlimited Supply of Human Skulls (That got a few faces in the group to go green.) Wiz: Tsung can teleport around the battlefield with the special move called, "Hot Escape". Boomstick: Wah! Sucker punch, bitch! Hot Escape Teleport Ability Extremely Fast Wide Range Burns victims when Appearing Close Enough Sucker Punch This earned a few snickers from Rainbow Dash, Pinkie, Spike, and even from Luna herself found Boomsticks little comment funny. Wiz: He can morph into whomever he wants, giving him tons of different skill sets, it's like fighting a hundred different foes combined into one. Morphing Can change into Anyone He Knows Copies Abilities and Stats of Subject Enables Hundreds of New Strategies “It’s like fighting a souped up changeling!” pointed out Pinkie Pie, which caused everyone to shudder at the thought of someone like Chrysalis, having an even stronger shapeshifting power. Boomstick: Man, I wish I could morph into anybody I wanted. I can have some fun with that! He also has a razor sharp Straight Sword, though he usually keeps it hidden for a surprise attack. Straight Sword About Three Feet Long Secretly Hidden Of Unknown Make Prefers Fists & Magic Over Swordplay Rarity shuddered as she had a feeling on what Boomstick meant by “fun”. Wiz: Shang Tsung possesses one other strange, but useful ability. Long ago, when he was caught cheating in the Mortal Kombat tournament, he was cursed, by the elder gods, to rapidly age until an untimely death. The only way to prevent this fate is to absorb the souls of his victims. “He does what?!” everyone screamed, stunned at the horrifying new knowledge on their second fighter. This knowledge even caused Rarity to almost faint and to cause the sisters of the sun and moon to bristle in anger. “ONLY THE MOST FOUL OF CREATURES WOULD DEVOUR THE SOULS OF ANY OTHER LIVING BEING!!” screamed the Night Princess, in her full canterlot voice. Forget about any hesitation before, Akuma was now the warrior she would be rooting for. Soul Steal Sustains Youth Restores Energy & Health Gains Opponent's Memories & Skills Uses Skills for Morph Boomstick: He can literally eat your soul. Your soul! Not only can this heal him, but he gets the memories of the souls he devoured. “He’s no better than a parasite living on borrowed time by leaching it from others.” commented the Sun Princess coldly, as everyone else would either nod in agreement or continued glaring at the screen. (*Cues: The Soul Chamber (Classic) - Mortal Kombat Trilogy*) Wiz: This helps him copy the move sets of other fighters when he morphs. “Man! And we compared him to the changlings, now I feel bad for comparing them to this creep.” ranted Rainbow Dash. Boomstick: So really, his curse became his deadliest weapon. Good punishment there, gods. “Let’s decide to never make that somepony’s punishment ever.”muttered Twilight with her fellow rulers nodding in agreement. Wiz: Shang Tsung has lived and fought for over a thousand years. His sorcery, powers, and brutal Fatalities are rivaled by few, and he's claimed the title of Grand Champion of Mortal Kombat several times, Almost bringing about the winning streak necessary to allow Shao Kahn to invade, Earthrealm, key word being "almost". “Oh? This should be good.” grinned Rainbow Dash. Boomstick: Yeah, unfortunately for Shang Tsung, he pretty much sucks at actually accomplishing his goals. He's super powerful, but like most villains, he can never get around some goody-two-shoes standing in the way of global take-over. That caused quite a few to laugh at the thought of the mighty Shang Tsung, being no better than some of the villains that they've faced. Wiz: His only notable victories have included treachery and deceit. But, keep in mind, Tsung's not fighting any ordinary meat-heads. He's fighting demons, sorcerers, and gods, and even in defeat, he somehow keeps coming back more lethal than ever. They would give the man that, he was facing against some high odds and was still around causing trouble. Almost reminded the three alicorns of a certain centaur. Shang Tsung: You... will... DIE! Wiz: Alright the combatants are set, but before we end this debate, I need some cash to buy more rats for genetic testing. Boomstick and ponies: What? ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ While the trailer played out the group were quick to discuss about the fighters and who they would be rooting for. For Team Akuma it was Rainbow Dash, Pinkie Pie, Spike, And even Luna. For Team Shang Tsung… well no one wanted to root for him and the rest of the group settled with just enjoying the show. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Death Battle (*Cues: The Tower (Classic) - Mortal Kombat Trilogy*) Akuma walks on the stage when Shang Tsung suddenly appears behind him from his Hot Escape technique. Akuma jumps away to the other side of the battlefield, and prepares to fight. FIGHT! (*Cues: TGS '08 PV BGM - Street Fighter IV*) Tsung shoots a Flaming Skull, which Akuma dodges by jumping over. He shoots two Hadoukens in the air, and Tsung blocks them. Akuma attacks Tsung's feet, and knocks him even more off balance by hitting him with a hurricane kick. and knocks him in the air with a Shoryuken uppercut. While in the Air, Akuma hits him a few time and finishes the combo with a Shinku-Hadouken. Tsung lays on the ground and Akuma tries to finish him off, but Tsung transform into a fighter known as Scorpion. (*Cues: Unknown Theme*) Akuma stops and decides to see if this form is powerful enough to fight against, allowing him to get back up. “What the buck are you doing Akuma!? Finnish him off!” screamed Rainbow Dash, along with the rest of team Akuma. Scorpion: COME HERE! “Ooooh! I hope we get to see this guy in the future episode!” chreered Pinkie Pie. Shang Tsung throws the rope dart at Akuma and drags Akuma over towards him. He uppercuts Akuma, cueing the "Toasty Guy", Dan Forden, to appear in the right corner of the screen. Dan Forden: TOASTY! That caused quite a few members of the group even the two immortal Princesses off guard, they all soon laughed at the randomness of it. Shang Tsung then keeps him in the air by hitting him with flaming skulls that burst out of the ground. Akuma falls behind him and throws him to right. He them teleports behinds him and kicks him, which Tsung blocks. He fires a Hadouken, but Tsung uses Hot Escape to get away, then reappears and slashes Akuma with his sword. He then grabs Akuma and tries to steal his soul, which heals some of his health and drains some of Akuma's. Akuma breaks out of it by hitting him with a Hurricane Kick. Tsung runs toward him, but Akuma catches him off guard using the Kongo Kokuretsu Zan, which knocks him in the air. He then teleports over, hits him a few times, and then throws him. Tsung then lands on his feet and transforms into Akuma. “This is going to be so awesome!” muttered Spike, with stars in his eyes. (*Cues: Hideyuki Fukasawa - Volcanic Rim Orchestral Again*) The two prepare for battle. Everyone was on the edge of their seats wondering who would win this battle. The real Akuma or the imitation. (*Cues: Theme of Gouken vs Ryu - Street Fighter IV*) The two Akuma's then jump in the air and they attack, blocking each other's moves. One of the Akuma knocks the other into the ground and then tries to finish him off using the Kongo Kokuretsu Zan. However, the other Akuma grabs him and finishes him off with a Shun Goku Satsu. As one of the Akuma's stands with his back to the screen with the iconic Heaven Kanji confirming the kill, it is then shown that the Akuma lying dead on the ground is Shang Tsung, who shortly turns back into his original form, releasing his souls. Everypony cheered. K.O.! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Results (*Cues: Street Fighter IV - Volcanic Rim Opening Version*) Boomstick: Oh man, that was way too close! “I'll say!” Applejack agreed, while wiping a nervous sweat from her brow. Wiz: No kidding, Boomstick! Akuma's raw power and speed pressed a distinct advantage early on. But, Tsung's own cleverness and wide array of skills quickly even the odds. “It really pays off to make sure to have a few tricks up your sleeve.” added Twilight. Boomstick: It looked like Akuma had the whole thing wrapped up, but Tsung's morphing trick saved his ass. Wiz: Akuma's pride for battle almost cost him his life, as he stopped to see if his new face was worth a challenge. “That arrogance almost cost Akuma.” Rarity added in, while everyone gave a small glance towards their rainbow mane friend. Seeing her making a similar mistake if she was ever in a fight. “What?” asked the blue mare, when she started to notice everypony staring at her. Boomstick: After switching up strategies, Tsung managed to steal enough of Akuma's soul for some extra health and new abilities. Wiz: But, it wasn't enough. In the end, Akuma's skills as a fighter proved unmatched. Everyone had to agree with that, an imitation hardly ever beats the real thing. Boomstick: I mean, Tsung loses to Liu Kang all the time, and compared to Akuma, Liu Kang's the nicest guy in the world. There was no way he could take Akuma's constant punishment. The girls couldn't help but laugh at the smiley face that was placed over someone who they guess was Liu Kang’s face. Wiz: As Tsung isn't used to winning anything on his own, he wasn't perfect on delivering the final blow, leaving him wide open for the experienced Akuma to unleash his greatest weapon. Boomstick: The Raging Demon of Instant-Hell-Murder-Awesomeness! “Yeah!” cheered a certain blue mare. Wiz: And so Shang Tsung fell once again releasing his devoured souls, again. Boomstick: Looks like Tsung's all souled out! Ha ha, get it, Wiz? “*giggle* I get it Boomy!” giggled out Pinkie Pie, as the rest of the group could only facehoof at the lame pun. Wiz: The winner is Akuma. The members of team Akuma cheered none louder than the Princess of the Night herself. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Boomstick: next time on death battle! Everyone lean forward, exited on who the next set of fighters would be. The music was composed of angelic choir along with brass instruments. The contestant was a female warrior wearing a skin tight outfit that's red and blue with stars on them as well wearing metal bracelets on her wrists and wearing a golden tiara on her head showing the signs of royalty which caught the attention of the three Princesses in the room. She sports long black hair that flows past her shoulders. Her face is beautiful to the male and even to the female eye and she also had the most beautiful yet piercing blue eyes. Than an unknown feminine voice made itself known shortly after. Unknown: Goodnight Sugar. Preview END. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ “Well guys, do you think we could squeeze one more episode for the Princesses before we call it a day?” ask the Princess of Friendship, gaining nods of agreement from her friend’s. “While that's great to hear, but I think we all should take a small break before we start the next episode.” suggested the Sun Princess, as she got up to stretch her limbs. Everyone agreed with the two sisters and started to make their way back to the kitchen to restock on snacks. Everyone, but, Luna who told everyone she needed to use the restroom for a sec and was given some directions to find it from Spike. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~( Bathroom no. 21.)~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ As Luna finished splashing some water on her face she grab a towel and dried herself and released a shaky sigh as she looked at the mirror in front of her. And like all ways, she saw the image of Nightmare Moon in her reflection. Always there to mock her and remind her of her mistakes. But, the only difference was now Akuma stood next to her inner demon, arms folded and a dark glare was being sent in her direction. But Luna did not falter and sent a glare right back at them causing the two phantom to give a look of surprise at the Princess of the Night. “I know why you two are here.” stated the princess. “You're here to make me remember the monster I once was.” she continued as the two specters settled with giving her a calm look. “Well, I say you're wasting your time!” she yelled at the two images. “I’m tired of being held down by this guilt!” the lunar princess ranted. “I AM PRINCESS LUNA! RULER OF THE NIGHT AND GUARDIAN TO MY FRIENDS! I AM NO LONGER THE MONSTER NIGHTMARE MOON AND NEITHER WILL I BECOME A DEMON LIKE AKUMA!” declared Luna as she took a moment to catch her breath and then took a quick glance towards the mirror. The two phantoms stood there for a few agonizing seconds that seem to go on forever. But to Luna’s surprise they gave her a smile and vanished from the mirror's surface now only showed Luna’s surprised face staring back at her. She stood there for a few more seconds, before a smile made it’s way onto her face as she closed her eye’s and took a long relaxing breath. “*sigh*… Finally, it’s over.” stated Luna, as she left the bathroom and started to make her way back to the ballroom and to reunite with the people she loved the most. She never notices the soft white glow the coverd her for a split second. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Chapter 3 END. (Next time: Rogue VS, Wonder Woman.) Rogue VS Wonder Woman.When Twilight’s group made their way back from the kitchen they quickly noticed Luna was already in her seat waiting for them. She gave off an air of peace and serenity that had not been there before, and had not been seen by her sister Celestia in years. “You seem in high spirits sister?” noted celestia with a warm smile. “Yes sister we- I mean I’ve done a little bit of thinking and I came up with a decision that I am most proud of.” replied Luna with a smile that could match her sister’s in warmth. The smile on celestia’s face just grew even bigger and warmer in response as she took a seat next to her sister and embraced her in a one wing hug. The rest of the group could only smile as they saw the two sisters show of affection towards each other. They then proceeded to make their way to their own seats while Twilight started up the last episode for today. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Interlude (*Cues: Invader - Jim Johnston*) Wiz: Superheroines. Millions have been drawn to these modern myths of comic book lore. Spike perked up at the word comic and started to get more excited for the episode. Boomstick: Or you could, uh, just be drawn to the way they're drawn. “I have a feeling I won’t like boomstick in this episode.” muttered Rarity. Wiz: Like Anna Marie, the Rogue… ‘The Rogue?’ thought the group. Boomstick: ...and Diana Prince, the Wonder Woman. Wiz: He's Boomstick and I'm Wizard. Boomstick: And we're here to watch two chicks duke it out! CATFIGHT! That caused the group to facehoof at boomstick. ‘Sweet~!’ Spike cheered inwardly. Wiz: It's our job to analyze their weapons, armor, and skills... Boomstick: And maybe a few other things. “Sigh… it’s going to be one of those moments.” muttered Rarity. Wiz: ...to find out who would win... a Death Battle. “Oh my even mr. wizard is getting annoyed.” noted Fluttershy. Rogue (*Cues: X-Men (2000) - The X-Jet*) Wiz: Rogue has possessed a variety of different powers over the years. For this duel in particular, we will use the most well known version; the original iteration from the comics and television show. Her deadliest weapon is her own skin. With just a touch, she absorbs a person's memories, talents, personalities, and abilities, whether superhuman or not, to use them herself. Power Absorption Activated throughout contact Absorbs memories, talents, personalities & abilities Temporary transfer Can use copied abilities Can be lethal with prolonged contact “No backstory for her?” Twilight asked. “Her powers must make her feel very lonely,” Fluttershy said sadly. “Though I have to say I wish to know how she makes her mane look so marvelous!” pipe in Rarity. Admiring the mutants wild yet beautiful locks. Boomstick: Too bad it knocks them out cold, and if she holds on long enough, it's game over. “What a terrible power to be burden with at such a young age.” stated Celestia sadly. Luna also gave the young woman a pitying look. Wiz: Tenacious foes like Juggernaut can resist it, but in the end, nobody is safe from Rogue's parasitic touch. For every second of contact, Rogue can keep these powers for a full minute. Though sometimes, there's unforeseen side effects. (*Cues: X-Men Theme - Hard Rock Remix*) Boomstick: She held on to Ms. Marvel for so long she absorbed her powers permanently. Now, she's got super strength, speed, and near invulnerability. Not that I blame her, though. I'd be holding' on to Ms. Marvel for as long as I could! Plus, then when she's unconscious I could... Ms. Marvel's Powers Super Strength ( Applejack liked that.) Flight at subsonic speed (and Rainbow Dash cheered when she heard that.) Near-Invulnerability Enhanced Reflexes Telepathic Resistance Seventh Sense “MOVING ON!” yelled Twilight while covering Spikes ears. Wiz: She also gained a seventh sense, the ability to unconsciously predict her opponent's' moves. “Now that’s a mighty fine ability.” AppleJack praised. Boomstick: But her seventh sense doesn't seem to always work. That or the writers just forgot about it 'cause, uh, Rogue gets her ass kicked a lot. “So much for a super power.” snarked Rainbow Dash Wiz: For plot convenience. Boomstick: And damn, she's got a hot ass. “What?” Everyone said at the same time. Wiz: What? Boomstick: Hey, that counts as a superpower in my book, Wiz! While she's not invincible, she doesn't have any real weaknesses either. She's a classy southern belle, who I'd like to take out to dinner. “Awww that’s kinda sweet.” cooed Rarity. Finding it sweet that boomstick thought Rogue as a classy lady. Wiz: Who can fly, lift buildings, and kill people just by touching them. Boomstick: Never mind! “Chicken!” mocked the blue speedster. Rogue: Ain't that enough? ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ The group had to admit that Rogue was a strong warrior and from what they saw a great hero as well. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Wonder Woman (*Cues: Wonder Woman (2009) - Ending Theme*) Wiz: To the uneducated nerd, Wonder Woman may seem a cheap clone of Superman. Boomstick: With Superboobies! “Uge…” groaned out Rarity while Rainbow Dash and Pinkie Pie laughed. Wiz: But in reality, she's a whole different story. Created from earth, born by god's, trained by ancient warriors… Master Combatant Trained since childhood Skilled at armed & unarmed combat Prefers fists over blades Best of the Amazons “Truly a fine warrior,” Luna said Boomstick: Maker of Wonder Bread! designer of the Wonderbra! Wiz: Boomstick, that's not true! Boomstick: See, I can do it to Wiz! “Hahahaha!!! Good one Boomy!” laughed Pinkie. Wiz: Wonder Woman is the incredibly powerful and near invincible ambassador of Themyscira, and self-appointed protector of the Earth. Boomstick: And she dresses like a stripper... a patriotic stripper! The girls wisely decided to ignore that little comment. Wiz: Diana Prince has been trained by the Amazons as a master combatant since childhood. She dueled the best of the best for the right to be crowned Wonder Woman. Her unearthly powers are divine, granted by ancient Greek gods and goddesses. From Demeter, she received superhuman strength and durability. Powers from Demeter Superhuman Strength Superhuman durability (resists all but blades & bullets) Magic Resistance Enhanced Healing Factor (*Cues: Justice League - Main Theme*) Boomstick: 'And you know that bitch Mailman god with the wingy shoes? Wiz: Hermes? Boomstick: Whatever. He gave Wonder Woman the ability to fly and move at hypersonic speed. Powers from Hermes Flight up to Mach-5 speed Superhuman reflexes (faster than Superman) Superhuman speed (VP to hyper-sonic) Wiz: She was given numerous other powers from enhanced senses, animal rapport, and blessings of wisdom and empathy. Other Powers Enhanced sight, smell, hearing, touch, & taste Multilingual Increased wisdom Superior Empathy Animal rapport 'Other useless stuff' “She can commune with animals?” questioned Fluttershy. Eyes sparkling in wonder. Boomstick: Aside from the obvious cannons rested right below her neck, she's got a pretty bizarre mix of weaponry. Her Lasso of Truth is a piece of unbreakable string that, well, makes you tell the truth. Lasso of Truth Forged by Hephaestus Unbreakable Infinitely elastic Forces the prisoners to tell the truth “Now that’s my kind of weapon,” Applejack said, thinking of all the uses she could use it for. Hippolyta: What other depraved thoughts must you be thinking? Col. Steve Trevor: God, your daughter's got a nice rack. Boomstick: Hell yeah, she does! At this point rarity could only cover her face with her hooves in frustration, while spike patted her shoulder. Wiz: She uses her tiara as a long range throwing weapon, using its razor sharp edge to slice open her enemies' throat. Boomerang Tiara Returns after each use Razor-sharp edges Can cut through most substances “Maybe we should get something like that, sister ” Luna said. Celestia looked at the tiara with a thoughtful look. Boomstick: Wonder Babe here uses the Bracelets of Submission, indestructible steel gauntlets forged from the remains of Zeus' legendary Aegis. These babies can block all sorts of attacks. Bracelets of Submission Indestructible Formed from the Aegis of Zeus Blocks blades, bullets, beams, & other attacks Can discharge lightning Wiz: She has persevered throughout the years, fighting a huge variety of foes, even killing the Greek God of War, Ares. Boomstick: Hear that, Kratos? A chick beat you to it! The group wondered who this Kratos person was or why the name brought a chill down their spines. Wonder Woman bashed the edge of the shield down to Mad Harriet. Wonder Woman: Let's see you smile now! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Wiz: Alright the combatants are set. let's end this debate once and for all. Boomstick: But first, I need singles from my very own stripper, thanks to Godaddy. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ \While the trailer played out everyone was discussing about the challenges and who they thought would win. On team Rogue we have Applejack, Rainbow Dash, Pinkie Pie, and Spike. And on team Wonder Woman. We have Twilight, Celestia, Luna, Rarity, and Fluttershy. With the teams set, everyone settled back down and let the trailer play through. Boomstick: Now it's time for a catfight Death Battle! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Death Battle (*Cues: Rogue's Theme - X-Men vs Street Fighter*) Rogue is shown flying in the sky. The Invisible Jet descends in background and Wonder Woman flies out. She kicks Rogue in the face, both Superheroines fly down to the ground. FIGHT! “Well that escalated quickly…” Twilight deadpanned. (*Cues: Unknown Theme*) Wonder Woman throws her tiara at Rogue, runs behind her, and roundhouse kicks her. The kick sends Rogue flying, Wonder Woman then flies after her, kicking her multiple times before dashing behind her again and punching her. She grabs a dazed Rogue with the Lasso of Truth and slams her on the ground numerous times, drags Rogue near her, and uppercuts her in the air. She darts around the airborne Rogue with a flurry of punches. “Whooowy! She ain't letting up for a second!” marveled Applejack. (*Cues: X-Men Theme - Hard Rock Remix*) When she punches Rogue in the face however, she absorbs some of Wonder Woman's powers, she absorbs more of her powers when she takes off her glove and touches her leg. While Wonder Woman breaks free, Rogue strikes her from behind, elbows her in the neck, and sends her soaring with a quick kick combo. Wonder Woman throws out her Lasso of truth again, but Rogue grabs it, tugs it, and slams her on the ground. Rogue flies behind her again and launches her tiara again, but Rogue blocks it, -propelling it back on her head- kicks her in the air and uppercuts her. Wonder Woman stops Rogue with several punches, but her finishing kick is blocked and she is knocked in the air. “That’s right! Her power works as long as her skin makes contact with the enemy.” realised Twilight. (*Cues: Wonder Woman (2009) - Ending Theme*) Rogue flies after her in the air, and is responded by a commotion of punches, Rogue blocks on of them and delivers some of her own, which is later black by Wonder Woman. She is then knocked down to the ground by a dive kick delivered by Wonder Woman. Both combatants fly down to the ground. Woman Woman dashes towards her with a flying kick, but it is interrupted by Rogue, who grabs her. “Here it comes!” yelled Rainbow Dash. Rogue: Good night, sugar! Rogue proceeds to plant a kiss of death upon Wonder Woman's lips, killing her. K.O.! Rogue then strikes a pose. Results (*Cues: X-Men (2000) - Main Theme*) Boomstick: Woo-hoo-hoo! This goes down in history as the best DEATH BATTLE! ever! Wiz: Poor Wonder Woman was more than a match for Rogue, but then she touched Rogue's face. “And that’s when it was all over for Wonder Woman.” commented Celestia. Boomstick: Wonder Woman is a trained fighter, so naturally she would strike her opponent's weakest spots, like the neck, stomach, joints and, well, the face. Wiz: In the end, her failure was a result of her thorough Amazonian training. “Sometimes it’s not wise to stick to the most basic strategy.” Luna commented “Indeed it’s always good to think outside the box.” added in Celestia. Boomstick: And her stripper outfit! Her leg was just begging the be grabbed there. Though personally, uh, I might have grabbed elsewhere. “... no comment.” muttered Rarity. Wiz: Wonder Woman's powers may be godly, but Rogue's taken similar powers before, so there's no reason to say she couldn't here. Adding Wonder Woman's strength and speed to Rogue's own power gave her a huge advantage, drastically turning the tide. Boomstick: A few high flying combos and our favorite X-Girl had Wonder Woman on the ropes. “Wonder woman just couldn't handle that kind of power.” commented Fluttershy. Wiz: And with her combined reflexes, speed, and seventh sense, she outmaneuvered Wonder Woman with one fatal kiss. Boomstick: Rogue sure "made out" in this fight! Again the group grond at Boomstick pun. Though like always Pinkie Pie was the only one who found it funny. Wiz: The winner is Rogue. Boomstick: Next time on Death Battle! Some 8-bit music starts to play and what we see is a field with strange floating blocks with question marks on them. A red, mushroom shaped creature with, legs angry eyes and a mouth enter the field. Shortly after, a four legged turtle also enters. FIGHT! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ‘Well it’s been fun but I bet we can all agree that we need to take a break from the show and get back to it tomorrow.” stated Twilight. Her statement was met with nods and words of agreement. As everyone parted ways and twilight and spike turn in for the night. The two sisters chose to fly their way back to canterlot instead of just teleporting their. “So sister, did you have fun with this show so far?” questioned the sun princess. Enjoying the breeze blowing through her mane. “Oh yes dear sister! Not only was the show entertaining but also helped me in certain things as well.” stated Luna as she twirled in the air. Enjoying this new feeling of freedom. “I can see that.” Celestia commented with a smile. Overjoyed with the fact that her sister had finally moved on from her guilt. “It was also nice to see a fellow princess do battle like that.” she added in. “Agreed! It reminds me of the days when you and me did battle against foul creatures and mad ponies that sought world domination.” agreed the night princess. Her eye’s glazed over with the memories of great battle and the taste of sweet victory. “Those were the days…” sighed the princess of the sun. memories of intense but rewarding battles playing through her head. The two sisters spent the next few minutes flying in silence. “HELP!!!” screamed a voice. Taking both sisters by surprise and snapping them both from their days dreams. They quickly look towards the direction they heard the voice saw a herd of ponies running through the forest covered in ash and soot. “What in harmony’s name?…” muttered Celestia. But before she had to think any harder on the strange site, her and her dear sister heard a roar that could rival the sound of thunder. Turning towards the new sound they spotted a small village in the distance.But they also spotted what was causing all of this chaos as well. For they saw placed right in the center of the small settlement, was a large dragon with sea green scales and large spikes on it’s back leading down it’s tail. From what they could tell it was at least as tall as the ponyville clock towar. Before Celestia could question further about a dragon being in equestria and attacking her people, she felt her sister lay a hoof on her shoulder. Turning her gaze towards her sister she saw that Luna had a small grin on her face. “What do you say sister? For old times sake?” the lunar princess ask, pointing at the giant dragon. All she got from her older sister was a similar grin in response. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ( With the dragon.) ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ “GAHAHAHAHA!!!” bellowed the green behemoth as he let loose another stream of sickly green flames onto another building. “LOOK AT THE LITTLE PONIES RUN! GAHAHAHAHAHA!!!” laughed the green beast as he knocked down a clock tower with one swing of his tail. But his twisted sense of fun was cut short as he notice something casting a shadow over him. Looking upwards he spotted two figures descending from the sky towards him and when he focused his sights on them he was able to make out what they look liked, and to his horror he saw that the two figures where the very rulers of the ponies he was just tormenting. Said princesses rocketed towards the scaled brute. Eye’s burning with fury and horn’s charged with potent magical energy, ready to bring down justice down onto the unlucky villain. ‘Oh shit.’ thought the dragon, right before his world exploded into a symphony of pain and regret. CHAPTER 4. END. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Next time Goomba VS Koopa. Goomba VS Koopa.We find our heroes the next in the ballroom getting ready to continue their watching spree of DEATH BATTLE. But their progress was halted by a certain blue pegasus. “OH COME ON TWILIGHT! Can’t we just skip this one!?” complained Rainbow Dash. “For the last time dash, NO!” Twilight yelled. Getting frustrated with her rainbow maned friend’s constant whining. “You just got to grit your teeth and bear it Dash.” added in Applejack. The blue speedster let out a load groan of frustration as the rest of the group took their seats in front of the television. “Aaaand start!” sang Twilight as she clicked play. Interlude (*Cues: Invader - Jim Johnston*) Wiz: The Mushroom Kingdom is a world that houses many strange and interesting creatures, like the Goomba, a walking brown mushroom with fangs. “A mushroom?” Applejack asked, confused by this fighter. “With fangs?” Fluttershy asked, equally confused as her blonde friend. “Teehee that’s funny.” giggled Pinkie Pie as she handed out some cupcakes to her friends. Boomstick: And the Koopa, that stupid turtle who always gets himself killed. “WHAT?” Rainbow yelled, mad that the host was disrespecting a turtle. Her little outburst caused her to drop her cupcake. Wiz: Every video game has its share of basic endless common enemies, and you can't get anymore common than these two. Boomstick: But which is the best of the worst? He's Wiz and I'm Boomstick. “This is gonna be lame,” Spike said, grabbing a handful of gems and shoving them in his mouth. Wiz: And it's our job to analyse their weapons, armor and skills to find out who would win a Death Battle. Goomba (*Cues: Melty Molten Galaxy - Super Mario Galaxy*) Wiz: The Goomba's used to be steadfast allies of the Mushroom Kingdom. After years of oppression due to their low intelligence and short stature, they betrayed their own mushroom brethren and became the backbone of Bowser's vast army. “They would betray their own brethren?” Twilight questioned. “Those no good varmints!” raged applejack. Disgusted that they would turn their backs on what Applejack saw as their family. Rainbow Dash also glared at the goombas on the sole fact that they would betray someone and join the bad guy. Boomstick: The Goomba's main combat strategy is just to walk directly into its opponents. While this isn't the smartest thing to do, it takes some real "spores" if you know what I'm sayin'. Plus, they also have these vampire fangs, but they don't ever seem to use them, and... thinking about it, why does a mushroom even have a mouth? Basic Combat Strategies: Charges into opponents Not very strong Adapts well to various environments Useless Fangs “That’s their strategy? Walk into their opponents?” Twilight said, her eye twitching a bit. “Even I find that dumb.” Pinkie Pie surprisingly deadpanned. Wiz: When available, the Goomba will, use the green Goomba's Shoe to get the jump on its foes, easily able to hop over twelve feet in the air. Goomba's can also sprout wings becoming Paragoomba, capable of barely sustained flight. Goomba's Shoe: Gives jumping ability Cannot be pierced by Spikes or Spinies Also called "Kuribo's Shoe" Can be stolen easily “Oh great this losers can can fly know.” snarked rainbow dash with even Fluttershy nodding in agreement. Annoyed that this little creatures were pretty much mocking the one thing all peguses took pride in. Boomstick: And when flyin', the mushroom thing can bomb victims below with Micro-Goombas. You know you're a badass when you throw babies as weapons! “NO IT DOES NOT!!!” screamed the terrified group, quickly growing to hate the goomba’s. Paragoomba Wings: Enables slow flight Better suited for hovering Easily clipped Can drop Micro-Goombas as living bombs Baby Killers Wiz: The traditional Goomba may seem a useless pawn, but these troopers have been know to accomplish the impossible. The girls and one dragon could only gawk at the sight of a goomba holding a baseball bat without arms or magic. Boomstick: Wait a minute, is that Goomba playing baseball? With no hands? Oh my God, it has telepathy powers! Wiz: Telekinesis? No, it doesn't. Boomstick: Well then how's it holdin' it?! “That’s what we would like to know.” Rarity said. Telekinesis Powers?: Can use baseball bats w/o hands & arms Not really, they're just weird like that... Wiz: Goomba's are unwaveringly brave, never backing down from a fight and always ferociously charging into battle without hesitation. Though, sometimes their stubborn courage can backfire. “Sounds like someone I know.” snarked Applejack. Giving her blue friend a flat look witch she returned in full. Boomstick: Yeah, you'd think it would stop walking when impending death is directly in front of it. Everyone facepalmed at that one. Wiz: After dissecting a ...voluntary Goomba myself, I discovered it's brain to be less than half the size of an acorn, proving what we've always known... Boomstick: Goomba's are fuckin' morons. After that quick review of the goomba’s, everyone admitted that the goomba’s where lame. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Koopa (*Cues: New Super Mario Bros. Wii - Castle Theme*) Wiz: Bowser's second most common foot soldier is the Koopa Troopa, the Turtle Warrior. Boomstick: Like Ninja Turtles!? “Awesome!” yelled Pinkie. Wiz: No, not Ninja Turtles. Boomstick/Pinkie Pie: Awh... “Those sounds awesome!” cheered rainbow dash, with everyone agreeing that ninja turtles did sound surprisingly cool. Wiz: While the Goombas are the backbone, the Koopas are prevalent enough to have Bowser's army named the "Koopa Troop". “Aw ya! Of course a turtle would be cool enough to have a troop named after them!” cheered Rainbow Dash, getting a few laughs from her friends. Boomstick: Koopas have their own set of Paratroopa wings that can fly for several minutes with no problem. “Well at least it’s better than the goombas” Applejack commented. Paratroopa Wings: Enables slow flight Decent aerial control Easily clipped Not exactly the best flyers Wiz: Koopas are also fairly skilled in Tennis, Baseball, Basketball and Go-kart driving. “That turtle is pretty talented,” Twilight said “Wonder if Tank could do some of those things?” Rainbow asked, imagining her pet playing all kinds of sports with her. Other Skills: Various Sports Running Banks Creating seaside resorts Go-Kart Racing Ruining safaris Forming lame gangs Boomstick: Are you sure it's not a Ninja Turtle? Wiz: Their best offence is also their finest defence, the Koopa shell, made of a tough steel-like substance capable of withstanding over 200 pounds of pressure. Boomstick: As an offensive weapon, the Koopa shell can destroy almost anything! It's a living torpedo of pain! Koopa Shell: Extremely durable Withstand over 200 lbs. Demolishes anything that is destructible Bounces off walls Comes in a variety of collectible colors “AWESOME!!” yelled the blue speedster. Wiz: There seems to be a common misconception that it takes Mario two hits to kill a Koopa. Actually, it only takes one. There just happens to be this durable shell in the way. However, this leads to the Koopa's greatest weakness. When Mario jumps on a Koopa's back, rather than retaliating, it retreats into its shell. Why? Boomstick: 'Cause they're a bunch of pussies! “They really cowards.” Rarity commented, even fluttershy was braver than this cowardly creatures. Wiz: That's right, Boomstick. The Koopas are cowards, afraid to face a dangerous foe. Some run from danger but most just hide in their thick shell. “Man I feel bad for tank being the same species as this chickens with shells.” Spike dryly commented Boomstick: Then again, if I were carrying an impenetrable fortress on my back and... some large Italian man was trying to murder me, I'd probably hide in it too. “I would have to agree with Mr. Boomstick there.” agreed fluttershy. Wiz: But you'd think as soon as Mario picked up the shell, it would a perfect time to counterattack, right? And even when they're flying after a good kick, they refuse to stick their feet out and stop themselves. Boomstick: Well... eh... ah, yeah, you're right, they're bitches. “Agreed.” everyone said. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ After the analyzing was done. It was pretty quick to see who was on which team. Goomba: no one. Koopa: Rainbow Dash Pinkie Pie. Everyone else: neutral. Now that the “teams” were set, twilight quickly hit play. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Wiz: Alright, the combatants are set, let's end this debate once and for all. Boomstick: It's time for a Death Battle! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Death Battle (*Cues: Super Marioland Theme - Remix*) The Koopa emerges from a Warp Pipe and calmly walks through the field. When he meets the Goomba, he stops. FIGHT! (*Cues: King Bowser - Super Mario Galaxy*) The Koopa and the Goomba both sprout wings, becoming the Paratroopa and the Paragoomba. They take to the air and fly into each other 4 times. After flying in a circle, the Koopa tries to hit the Goomba by doing something similar to the Spin Dash from Sonic the Hedgehog, but misses. As the Goomba smiles, the Koopa ricochets of a wall and hits the Goomba, who falls under a Thwomp, which he manages to avoid, He also avoids 3 more Thwomps but gets hit again by the Koopa, who is squashed under a fifth Thwomp. The Goomba lands near a cannon, followed by the Koopa. As they both fly up, the cannons fire at them both. As they dodge the cannonballs and Bullet Bills, they trade a few blows. The Koopa tries to hit the Goomba using the trick he tried earlier, but mises and continuously ricochets of the walls again. When he stops, 6 Bullet Bills fly up, but the Goomba stops them by dropping Micro-Goombas onto them. After dodging 2 more Bullet Bills, the Goomba and Koopa are high in the air. As they fly into each other some more, the Angry Sun attacks the Goomba and the Koopa. While the Koopa successfully evades the Sun, the Goomba is hit and loses his wings. Luckily, he lands in a Kuribo's Shoe. As the Koopa descends, the Goomba hops towards his opponent in the shoe. The Koopa hides under a line of Breakable Blocks as the Goomba hops on the Blocks above him. The Koopa tries to escape by flying to the right then quickly flying into the pipe, but the Goomba hits the Koopa, knocking him into the Pipe. The Goomba hops after the Koopa, but gets attacked by a Piranha Plant emerging from the pipe. The Koopa (who lost his wings from the attack) come out the other end of the pipe, to meet a group of Red Goombas who live underground. The Goomba appears and hits the Koopa, causing him to hide in his shell. As the Red Goombas dance victoriously, the Goomba spots a pool of Lava near the Koopa. The Red Goombas continue to dance as the Goomba advances towards the Koopa and kicks him, causing him to slide towards the lava. Luckily, the pool of Lava is small enough for the Koopa to slide over it and hit a block, causing him to slide into the Goomba and the Red Goombas. Unfortunately, he also slides into a much larger pool of Lava, reducing him to a skeleton (Dry Bones ). “That… was… AWESOME!!!” screamed rainbow dash. While everyone was stunned on how intense the battle was Double K.O.! Results (*Cues: Desolate Path - Super Mario 64*) Boomstick: Oh man, I thought this was gonna suck! That was awesome! Who knew those little fuckers could fight like that? “A’ll say!” a stunned Applejack commented. Wiz: The Goomba's arsenal proved effective enough, but its own stupidity became its downfall. “Good tools are are mere toys in the hands of a simpleton.” Twilight said. Boomstick: Then the Koopa wussed out and kept to the safety of his shell, not stopping in time to avoid the Giant Pool of Lava Death. “A huge blunder on his part.” deadpanned Rarity. Wiz: Even the Koopa's tough shell can't protect it from fire. “Poor things.” whimpered fluttershy. Boomstick: You might say this battle really heated up in the end. Cue facepalm and one laughing fit from Pinkie. Wiz: This battle is a Draw. END. Boomstick: Next time on Death Battle. The main Six and Spike are now expecting a more exciting fight and they seem to have their wish granted. What they see are two manly, shirtless hulking men that looked like they were overdosed with testosterone with epic facial hair and are now being pitted against each other in earth shattering battle. “.....” The girls and one drake stared at the scene after seeing that epic trailer. “NEXT EPISODE NOW!!!” the rest of the group yelled as twilight hastily hit play. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ CHAPTER END. Next episode Mike haggar VS. Zangief Haggar VS Zangief.The group quickly gathered around the tv with a fresh set of snacks and drinks. All were excited to see the two titans clash, but twilight was quick to notice that her southern friend Applejack looked a little hesitant to watch the next episode and constantly looked towards the clock when she thought no one was noticing, “Is there a problem Applejack?” Twilight whispered as she walked up to her blond friend. Said mare jump, not noticing her lavender friend approaching her. Quickly giving her a awkward smile Applejack traid to come up with an excuse on why she was acting so funny but croumbled under the Princess of friendships stare. “Sigh… sorry Twi I don’t mean to ruin everyone’s fun, but i’m just a little distracted with some things back at the farm.” admitted the blond mare “Oh? Whats wrong AJ, if there somthing going on you know me and the girls will always help.” offered the young alicorn with a smile, which earned her one in return. “Well you see Twilight me and my family have been dealing with… well you see.” stuttered the blond mare at the end. “Yes?” urged Twilight. “We've been dealing with a… bugbear.” Applejack admitted in defeat. “A bug bear!?” hissed Twilight quietly as to not alert their other friends. “Shhhh! Quite! It’s not that big of a deal.” Applejack said hastily “No big deal!? Don’t remember how much trouble a bug bear gave us?” whispered Twilight. “A’h remember what that old varment did but this isn’t the same!” argued Applejack. “This is a young bugbear. It’s barely half the size of the first one and me and Big Mac can chase it off ourselves.” she explained. “But by the time we do it’s already torn down one of our tree’s and ate all of the apples on it.” she explained further with a sigh of frustration. “So that’s why you’ve been nervous? Twilight questioned. “You're worried that it will attack the farm again while you're gone?” “Ya… and i was wondering after this episode, that it would be ok for me to run back to my farm real quick and check up on things?” asked a hopeful Applejack. “... Sighe. Fine, but it this keeps up then me and the rest of the girls are helping.” declared Twilight. Giving her apple friend a hard look, as to dare her to challenge her decision. After that was done the two made their way towards the rest of their friends and Twilight hit play. Interlude (*Cues: Invader - Jim Johnston*) Wiz: Capcom has produced hundreds of deadly warriors, but few can best these two hulking leviathans. Boomstick: Haggar, the mayor elect of Whoop ass… Why would he spank a donkey?” questioned a confused Pinkie Pie. Wiz: ...and Zangief, Russia's red Cyclone. “So cool!” praised rainbow dash. Boomstick: These two wrestlers have never met in person but their rivalry is legendary and it's about time they duked it out! “Their rivalry is legendary but they never met?” questioned Spike. “It must mean their fans are the one’s who keep arguing and fighting over who’s best.” explained rainbow Dash. All too familiar on how crazy some fans get over their idols. (Scootaloo was still in trouble for picking a fight with a girl who thought Lightning Dust was cooler than Rainbow Dash.) Wiz: I'm Wizard and he's Boomstick and it's our job to analyse their weapons armour and skills to find out who would win a Death Battle. Haggar (*Cues: Muscle Bomber/Saturday Night Slam Masters - Mike Haggar (Original CPS1 Arcade Version*) Boomstick: Standing 6 foot - 7 and weighing 266 pounds, 30 of which is probably in his manly mustache, it's Mike Haggar! “That’s an awesome mustache,” Spike said, awed by the magnificent facial hair. “I’ll say.” cooed Rarity as she fanned herself. Totally stunned by the muscles on the first contestant. Wiz: For many years, Haggar was a champion wrestler of Slam Masters until being elected mayor of Metro city, a metropolis overrun with street gangs. “And he's a mayor? Mayor Mare better watch out,” Pinkie said, wondering if he’s better than their own mayor. Boomstick: Too bad there aren't more badasses in office. Most mayors would just put up laws against crime or increase the police force but Mike takes matters into his own hands. Background Height: 200 cm / 6'7" Weight: 121 kg / 266 lbs. Fighting Style: American Wrestling & Scottish Backhold Mayor of Metro City, former wrestler “I would so vote for him if he was running for mayor,” Rainbow said, imagining Haggar running Ponyville. “As would I, darling. It's refreshing to see a higher authority fight for their city,” Rarity said American Wrestling Grabs Holds Twists Quick Strikes Submissions Tie-Ups Wiz: Haggar is a former pro American wrestler, specializing in grabs, holds and quick strikes. He's of Scottish ancestry and proud of it, even having a scottish flag on his gym. It's likely he has also trained in Scottish backhold wrestling, which involves bear hugging an opponent and keeping your balance while overpowering theirs. Scottish Backhold Focused on Balance Grappling Pressure Sustained Grip No ground work involved “Hmmm interesting.” Applejack remarked, as the wheels started to turn in her head. Boomstick: Haggar's got a devastating move set ranging from Suplexes, Body Splashes and his own invention, Spinning clothesline double lariat, which Zangief stole for his own use. To even the score, Haggar copied Gief's spinning piledriver. When Haggar isn't overpowering people with his pure manliness, his weapon of choice is a blunt pipe. Hey, he's a mayor that kicks ass and recycles. Notable Moves Suplex Piledriver Backflip Drop Body Splash Spinning Clothesline Lariat Spinning Piledriver Steel Pipe Favored melee weapon Decent Projectile “That’s good!” Fluttershy commented. (*Cues: Unknown Theme*) Wiz: Even after his victorious election, Haggar continued his vigorous training. Boomstick: By Piledriving Sharks! “WHAT?” everyone screamed in either excitement, Rainbow and Spike, to awe, Rarity and Applejack, or in terror for the rest. “This guy's my hero,” Rainbow and Applejack said at the same time. Wiz: It appears Haggar wrestles Bull Sharks, one of the deadliest sharks on Earth. These can grow up to 11 feet long and weigh up to 500 pounds. Wrestling these proves Haggar's proficiency in the Scottish backhold, as he keeps his balance against the thrashing sharks until he can piledrive them into the beach. Bull Sharks 7-11 ft. long 500 lbs. Very dangerous Swims near shores often Wrestling demonstrates Scottish Backhold “And he piledrived one of those ghastly creatures?” Rarity asked, not sure what to believe. Next to her, Fluttershy felt bad for the poor animal. Boomstick: Next "Jaws" movie needs more Haggar! Wiz: Unfortunately, during his time as mayor, Haggar was undoubtedly forced to prioritize politics over training. It's likely he didn't have much time to learn new techniques or train against many other wrestlers. As a result, he uses moves and skills from an older era. “As the life of a ruler.” commented Twilight. Knowing the pains of not practicing your craft as much as you used too. Boomstick: They seem to work pretty damn well! Wiz: He certainly hasn't lost his touch. Announcer: "Mike Haggar, the candidate who puts people first." Haggar growls and kills a Bald Eagle who has perched on his arm. “Birdie NO!” cried out fluttershy. Zangief (*Cues: Zangief Theme (Atomic Fusion Remix) - Street Fighter II*) Wiz: Zangief stands 7 feet tall at 350 pounds, weighing in as one of the strongest on the Street Fighting circuit. Background Height: 214 cm / 7'0" Weight: 181 kg / 400 Ibs Hobbies: Wrestling, cossack dancing, vodka drinking Fighting Style: Russian Wrestling & Sambo Boomstick: And as a testament to his manliness, check out that wicked shin hair! Rarity shuddered at the amount of hair. Wiz: Zangief is a champion wrestler in Russia, using push and pull techniques to throw his opponents off balance. He also specialises in Sambo, a combination of wrestling and martial arts. He's not skilled in leglocks and chokeholds but his grappling, submissions and groundwork are second to none. Russian Wrestling: Grabs & holds Tie-Ups Throws from Tie-Ups Push & Pull opponent to throw off balance Counter-Attacks when foe loses balance Boomstick: Zangief's best moves include his double Lariat, Atomic Suplex, flying Power bomb and a wicked backhand called the Banishing Flat, a move Zangief learned specifically to counter projectiles! Zangief... Hates... Projectiles! Sambo: Mix of wrestling & martial arts Uses tactics from Vikings, tartars, & golden horde Grappling, ground work, & submissions No leg locks or chokeholds “He would hate twilight then.” a cheeky Rainbow Dash said. Getting said lavender alicorn to roll her eyes at her friend. Wiz: His signature move is the Spinning Piledriver, which he learned after getting caught in a cyclone while piledriving a bear. Notable Moves: Double Lariat Flying Power Bomb Atomic Suplex Body Splash Banishing Flat Spinning 'Screw' Piledriver “B-but that's not scientifically possible,” Twilight said, trying to wrap her head around this impossible feat. “Well he did it,” Pinkie said as she munched on a cupcake. “Hmmmm I could use that…” muttered Applejack as she kept her full attention on screen. Boomstick: That's the most awesome thing I've ever heard! “I know,” Spike, Rainbow and Applejack said in amazement. Wiz: Actually, wrestling bears has been Zangief's favourite training exercise since he was a kid. Supposedly, he wrestles Grizzly bears, but these are not native to Russia. It's far more likely he wrestles Ussuri Brown Bears, which can weigh up to 1500 pounds, well over twice the size of a full grown Grizzly. Ussuri Brown Bears Up to 1500 lbs. Twice as large as grizzly bears Rarely in packs Occasionally he wrestles polar bears “That bigger than Harry,” Fluttershy muttered. Boomstick: Holy shit! He piledrived one of those into a Tornado!? “What a beast!!!” screamed a ecstatic Rainbow Dash. Wiz: Battling such a massive beast corresponds with his Russian wrestling training perfectly, forcing the bears to lose their balance and knocking them out cold! Zangief is a loyal Russian through and through, always fighting for his country rather than personal gain. He is often employed by the Russian President as the country's official fighting representative. That said, Zangief is pretty dimwitted, more a follower than a leader. He fights with instinct rather than reason. “Well at least he cares for his people.” fluttershy added. Boomstick: All the more reason to get out of his way! Zangief: (Attacks the Duck Hunt Dog and piledrives it) Mmmmhhh! Me Zangief broke you! “Not the puppy!” cried fluttershy. Wiz: Alright the combatants are set. Boomstick: The Unstoppable-Force against the Immovable-Mayor! Wiz: Let's end this debate once and for all. Boomstick: Wait up, first I gotta pay for my lazor guided Kitten Cannon. "What!?" The girls screamed in disbelief. This guy was going shoot kittens out of a cannon?! How mosterouse! Wiz: Lazor what? Boomstick: Thanks to Netflix. Suc it up you babies this kitten cannon is important to me! (sound of a cannon shooting and then the screeching of a cat) ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ As the trailer played out everyone was quick to choose sides. On team Haggard: Twilight, Fluttershy, Rarity. And on team Zangief: Spike, Pinkie Pie, Rainbow Dash. Applejack liked them both so she was rooting for them both. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Boomstick: It's time for a Death Battle! Death Battle (*Cues: Intro Theme - Saturday Night Slam Masters*) Zangief and Haggar stand in a deserted street. Haggar stretches his muscles and rips his shirt while Zangief removes his cape, points upwards and laughs, and drinks a bottle of beer before crushing the bottle. “Things are about to go down.” a wide eyed Rainbow Dash commented FIGHT! (*Cues: Lobby Screen - Street Fighter IV*) Haggar and Zangief both grab each other and look each other in the eyes before Zangief throws Haggar behind him. He tries to attack Haggar with a flying kick, only to get blocked. He tries to punch him, but his punches get blocked too. (*Cues: Unknown Theme*) After dodging Zangief's lariat, Haggar suplexes him, attacks him with a lariat and kicks him. Zangief suplexes Haggar twice and piledrives him before throwing him across the street. “This is getting intense” Twilight stuttered. As Zangief advances, Haggar kicks him and attacks him with a steel pipe but Zangief counters with the Banishing flat, knocking him into a building, which Zangief enters to finish the duel. As they fight, they also go upstairs. A couch, a globe, Princess Peach, a Dragon ball, Big the Cat and Pedobear get thrown out the building. “What kind of crazy building are they fighting in!?” yelled a confused spike. (*Cues: Historic Distillery Stern - Street Fighter IV*) Haggar and Zangief's fists hit each other and Haggar tries and fails to hit Zangief but Zangief suplexes Haggar near a window and, after a few blocked punches, throws himself at Haggar, sending them both out the window. “Watch out below!” screamed Pinkie Pie. Zangief tries to pile drive Haggar into the pavement, but then Haggar begins to turn the tides and tries to piledrive Zangief, then Zangief tries to piledrive Haggar, then Haggar tries to piledrive Zangief. This goes on for a while until they both hit the pavement. As the dust clears, Haggar and Zangief are both seen lying down on the pavement. But Haggar has blood around his head, indicating his death, then, Zangief stands up, points both arms upward and laughs triumphantly. K.O.! Results (*Cues: Ultra Street Fighter IV - The Next Door: Indestructible (Instrumental)*) Boomstick: Aahh.. a great man has fallen today... “Me too.” mourned everyone as they wiped away strays tears. Sad that such a great man had died. Wiz: Haggar and Zangief's similar moveset appeared evenly matched, anticipating each other's moves and countering with their signature attack. Boomstick: He's led a long productive life, kicking ass, ruling Metro City and keeping the beaches safe from rogue sharks… “Stop it! I’m going to cry.” wailed Rainbow Dash. Wiz: Not only is Zangief almost 100 pounds larger than Haggar, he's also 13 years younger and been training all his life. “Youth and experience always wins out in the end.” muttered a sad Applejack. Boomstick: I'm gonna miss that wonderful mustache! “US TOO!!” everyone cried as they all became a blubbering mess. Wiz: Zangief's youth and lack of political agenda were enough to give him a slight edge. “Sniff… that's also another strong factor as well.” commented Twilight sadly. Boomstick: Poor Haggar. He may piledrive sharks, but Zangief's bears were three times larger and probably twice as dangerous! Sure Haggar can grapple a half ton shark without falling over, but if Zangief can push around 1500 pound bears as a hobby, Haggar didn't stand a chance. Wiz: He definitely put up a great fight though. Everyone agreed with that full heartedly. Boomstick: That, he did. He just found his window of opportunity. Wiz: The winner is Zangief. Everyone cheered for the red cyclone of Russia, but quieted down as the next battle was about to be announced. Boomstick: Next time on Death Battle. The next contestants weren't two… but four! Four anthropomorphic turtles with different colored mask where shown on screen with the following message. BATTLE ROYALE. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ As soon as the episode was over, Twilight hit pause so everyone could get up and stretch and move about. “Well girls before Twi starts the next episode, A’h need to make a quick run back to the farm to check on things.” Applejack said. “Well don’t keep us waiting too long Applejack.” replied Rarity. “Also try to bring some cider for the next episode.” requested Rainbow Dash. “Haha. sure thing girls.” the southern pony said as she made her way back home. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ (later at sweet apple acres) ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ We now find ourselves in Sweet Apple Acres. The only place to find a tasty apple in all of ponyville. To which a certain monster would agree to. For we now see a creature devouring the fruit from one of the Apple Family’s pride and joy Apple tree’s. It appears to be a hybrid between an insect and a bear. It possesses a bear's body with the fur coloring of a panda, along with two additional arms, as well as insectoid antennae, wings, and the stinger of a hornet, and it was currently stuffing it’s face with the livelihood of a certain blond mare. “I knew I would find you here today while the farm was unguarded.” Applejack said, as she marched her way towards the gluttonous monster. Said monster could only stare at the approaching blond pony before letting out an amused chuckle. It then tossed the apple it was eating aside and charged it’s soon to be dinner. But Applejack was ready for this and when the greedy creature took a swing at her, she quickly ducked under the first swing and then she turned her back to the beast and reared her legs back and then she bucked the monster right in the face with all her might! Launching it into the air, where it was too stun to use it’s wings to fly. Not letting this chance pass by, applejack jumped into the air and quickly wrapped her legs around the beast and did the impossible. She started to spin in mid air, faster and faster until her and the bugbar where nothing but a blur that crashed into the ground, kicking up a cloud of dirt. Once the dust settled the scene we are treated to was of the bugbear’s defeat! As it laid there unconscious and with a large lump and it’s head right where it’s cranium made contacted with the ground. And our hero stood over the beast with a triumphant grin plastered on her face. But fatigue quickly caught up to her and she soon fell on her rump in exhaustion. But her grin was still in place because she was too proud of what she did to let some sore muscles get in the way of her happiness. “Hahaha! How do like them apples? I did it!” Applejack cheered to heavens. But unbeknownst to her, in the very heavens where the masters of the sacred piledriver that she imitated in her fight with the bugbear. Looking down at her with proud smiles. “It seems we have a worthy successor to our art my Russian friend.” said the mustached mayor of metro city. “BWAHAHAHAHA!! True my friend! Little pony makes mother Russia proud with that battle with monster bear!!” laughed the red cyclone in pure joy. “HA agreed!” laughed Haggar, as he and Zangief made their way through the pearly gates, Knowing that there was someone out there to carry on their legacy. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ CHAPTER END. NEXT TIME, TMNT BATTLE ROYAL! Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles Battle RoyaleIt didn’t take long for Applejack to get freshen up and to grab a barrel of cider, mutch to the enjoyment of Rainbow dash and now that she was back, twilight quickly it play to start the last episode for today. Interlude (*Cues: Invader - Jim Johnston*) Wiz: Leonardo, Donatello, Michelangelo, Raphael. The Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles were grown from ooze and raised by a warrior rat in the sewers of New York to be the world's most fearsome fighting team. “.... what?” muttered Twilight. Boomstick: Lots of superheroes have some weird origin stories but this one is plain ridiculous! “It does sound pretty farfetched,” Spike said, as he looked at the somewhat strange team. “And The Power Ponies don’t?” Twilight deadpanned while rolling her eyes. “It’s a bit more believable than this,” Spike muttered, believing aliens were more realistic than mutant turtles. Wiz: Their greatest advantage in battle is their family bond and teamwork. But, on their own, which Turtle is deadliest? “I don’t like the sounds of this,” a nervous Applejack said. Starting to get a bad feeling about this episode. Boomstick: He's Wiz and I'm Boomstick. Wiz: And it's our job to analyse their weapons, armor and skills to find out who would win a Death Battle. Leonardo (*Cues: Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (1987) - Main Theme (MARCH REMIX)*) Wiz: Leonardo, the leader of the team is smart, strategic with a strong sense of honor. “Sounds almost like Twilight,” said Pinkie Pie. “More like my brother,” Twilight muttered, imaging Shining’s reaction to the blue masked turtle. Background Height: 5'2" Weight: 180 lbs. Master of Ninjitsu, Bushido, & Swordsmanship Leader & Strategist Favorite Color: Blue Skilled in using environment Boomstick: Too bad he traded his sense of humour for that sense of honor. This guy always means serious business. His weapon of choice is the Ninjaken swords: Shorter, sturdier and straighter than an ordinary Katana, and designed for swift deadly strikes! Out of all the Turtles' weapons, the Ninjaken is the only one specifically designed to murder people! What's better than one Ninjaken? Two, Damnit! Ninjaken Sword 2' long blade Designed for swift, deadly, offensive strikes Also called Ninjato Commonly referred to as Katana Invented in Hollywood “It was pretty rare to see any royal guard wielding two weapons back in canterlot,” commented Twilight. Wiz: In many timelines, Leonardo's the one who ultimately defeats the Shredder, though always with plenty of help. As leader, he is usually the one with a plan. He spends most of his time training his body and mind under his Master Splinter's instruction and follows Bushido, a strict Samurai code of honor and duty. At one point, he even fought and killed a sort of physical embodiment of the Devil. Skill Set Expert strategist Sword master Strong both physically & mentally Serious devotion to training & family Bushido code “He must be powerful if he can defeat that scary thing,” Fluttershy stuttered, feeling scared of the picture of the devil. Boomstick: Giving Keanu Reeves a much needed break! “Don’t know who that is but he sounds like he could be in an action movie!” said Pinkie Pie. mutch to the confusion of her friends. Wiz: However, Leonardo finds it difficult to accept failure. Should things go horribly wrong, his concentration can quickly slip away from him, leaving him sloppy and imprecise. “Accepting defeat can still teach you,” Rarity said, glancing at Applejack. Applejack groaned and said, “You try to do the impossible one time and you’ll never let me live it down.” Boomstick: Leo doesn't like to lose. “Well tough! Even I know I’ll lose one day,” Rainbow Dash said. Showing a surprising amount of maturity that impressed her friends. Leonardo (1987 cartoon version): "Quit clowning you guys! This is serious!" ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ The girls could agree the leonardo was a great warrior but he really needed to let go of all the stress and pressure he puts on himself. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Donatello (*Cues: Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2 (1991) - Cowabunga*) Wiz: Donatello is the brains of the bunch. “So Twilight then?” Rainbow asked, looking at her friend. Boomstick: He does machines! Background: Height: 5'2" Weight: 180 lbs. Master of Ninjitsu & Bojitsu Brains & Technician Favorite Color: Purple Wiz: Right, Boomstick. Somehow, he learned to operate and manipulate both Human and alien technology without any formal education or budget whatsoever. He also speaks 100% fluent Techno-babble. Rainbow grinned and said, “Definitely Twilight.” She was then hit with a pillow by said pony. “I’m not that bad,” Twilight said, looking at her other friends for support but saw that they were looking away from her. “Well not all the time,” she muttered as Pinkie boops her. Donatello: "The resulting intermit multi-polar flux should create the Electromagnetic Pulse!" “Did anypony understand that?” Spike asked, scratching his head as his friends shrugged. Boomstick: What the hell did I just hear? All that gibberish means he's probably trained less than the others, devoting more of his time for Science! “Man~ sounds like one of egghead’s lectures.” groaned out Rainbow Dash. Wiz: Fortunately, his useful Bo Staff makes up for his lack of constant training. Durable Oak and Six feet long, the Bo gives Donatello far more attack range than his other brothers. Bo: 6' long staff Durable Oak Longest reach of all the team's weaponry Rocksteady's worst nightmare “That could help you from staying away from danger,” Twilight said, thinking of the times Shining trained with the guards. Boomstick: The range is nice, but it takes a lot of time and patience to kill anybody with a stick! “I don’t want to know how he knows that,” deadpanned Rarity. Wiz: He's no expert strategist, that's Leonardo's turf, but Donatello's considered the most level-headed of the Turtles. Even with his time spent tinkering, he's still a very capable warrior, easily keeping up with his brothers and even killing the Shredder in an alternate dimension. Skill Set: Level-Headed Bojitsu Master Master Technician & Programmer Rumored I.Q. of 637 Fluent in Techno-Babble Boomstick: An ass-kicking nerd? I don't believe it. “HEY!” yelled Twilight, with puffed cheeks, which caused her friends to laugh at the cute sight. Donatello (2003 cartoon version): "Eh, I'm making this up as I go." ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ The girls had to say that while Donatello had the smarts, he probably wouldn't when with someone like Leo who could out think him in a fight. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Michelangelo (*Cues: TMNT: Turtles in Time - Big Apple, 3 AM*) Wiz: Michelangelo is the youngest of the turtles. He's lazy, undisciplined and easily distracted. He spends his free time playing video games, watching TV, reading comic books and eating pizza. Background: Height: 5'2" Weight: 180 lbs. Master of Ninjitsu, Nunchakus, Oriki-Gusari, & Whirling Pizzas Party Dude Favorite Color: Orange “Sounds like a fun guy,” rainbow dash said, with pinkie and spike nodding in agreement. Boomstick: That turtle is fucked up! Wiz/everyone: What? Boomstick: Come on, you can't tell me that that turtle is not on drugs! “What’s boomstick talking about? He looks fine to me.” commented Rarity, starting to get annoyed at what she considered bullying on the boomsticks part. Wiz: I don't know, I always thought he was dropped as a kid. “That’s a horrible thing to say Mr. Wizard!” gasped out Fluttershy. Boomstick: Okay, look! He has all the signs! Strange eating habits, inability to pay attention, incoherent phrases... Everyone took a side glance at Pinkie Pie, who was eating her weight in cupcakes. Wiz: Moving on, his weapon of choice... Boomstick: The bong! “What?” everyone said at the exact same time, wondering what the item was. Wiz: No, the Nunchaku, isn't really a weapon at all. It's a farming tool for threshing grain. These "weapons" are unnecessarily overcomplicated clubs with the effectiveness of a tattered flyswatter. Yet SOMEHOW, Michelangelo has been able to blunder his way through fights to victories he really doesn't deserve! “Are they really undermining the poor fella’s victory’s!?” yelled Applejack. Getting real sick of the two host uncalled hatred for the poor turtle. Nunchucks: Also called 'Nunchakus' Overcomplicated Looks Cool? Maybe? Farming Tool Good for strangling Obviously, Mikey strangles foes off-screen Boomstick: He even beat Raph once. “Well that’s an accomplishment right there,” Twilight said, happy to know the orange masked turtle has a victory under his belt. “Ya! You jerks can at least give him that!” yelled spike. Wiz: Sure, I get it, swing chuks around gives him momentum to hit with them, blah, blah, blah, but in the end, a baseball bat will give you the same effect and more with much less effort. Seriously, who came up with these things? They're preposterous! “They look useful,” Rainbow grumbled as she crossed her hooves. “Ya and I bet there’s a great man out there who could use them!” added Applejack. “COUGH!!BRUCE LEE!COUGH!!” "coughed" Pinkie Pie. Boomstick: You're prepostemous! “And he's insulting Michelangelo's intelligence?” deadpanned Twilight. Wiz: And, for some reason, in all his infinite wisdom, the great master Splinter gave the most complicated weapon to the retard of the group. WHY? “Why are they bullying Mikey?” Fluttershy asked, not seeing anything wrong with the turtle. Sure he wasn’t the brightest but that didn’t give the hosts the right to bash him. Boomstick: Mikey's not gonna win this fight, is he? Wiz: He'd better not. “Whats with all the hate!?” screamed Rarity. Michelangelo (2007 movie version): "Ho ho, someone's cranky!" ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ The group could agree no matter what, Michelangelo would be a great warrior. No matter what some people say. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Raphael (*Cues: I Beam Fight - TMNT*) Boomstick: Raph is cool but crude! Hell, forget crude, this guy's borderline psycho! Wiz: Sure to throw the first punch, Raphael is certainly the most vicious of the team. He's constantly butting heads with the others and challenging Leonardo's leadership. Background: Height:5'2" Weight: 180 lbs. Master of Ninjistu & Sais Hot-Tempered brawn Favorite Color: Red Everyone in the room looked at Rainbow when Wiz said the first line. Feeling everyone’s eyes on her, Rainbow Dash said, “I don’t do that.” “You accused me of being a spy, hit a dragon the first chance you got and rushed into many other situations without a plan,” Twilight deadpanned as everyone agreed. Boomstick: He uses twin Sai, which is like a combination of a pitchfork, dagger and Wolverine's claws! Sai: Dagger-like truncheon Used against swords Primarily offensive Traps & controls an opponent's weapons For stabbing, not slicing “This wolverine guy sounds awesome!” Rainbow dash said. “I would like to see him in an episode,” commented Pinkie Pie. Wiz: Like the nunchuk, they also humbly began as a farming tool but were re-evaluated to counter the oppressive samurai. “Wow, so the farmers used a simple tool as a weapon?” Twilight exclaimed, wondering if other farming equipment could be used as a weapon “So wait, they give this guy a free pass on his weapons but not Mikey?” asked a confused Spike. Boomstick: They're best used as a close ranged defensive weapon. The triple prongs are designed to block, trap and control an opponent's weapon, while using the pummel to beat the enemy into submission. Raph's Sai can even snap swords! “That quite the weapon to be used in different ways,” Rarity said, amazed by the versatility of the weapon. “I’d use them,” Rainbow said, liking the snapping swords part. Wiz: Raphael is not exactly the smartest fighter, usually rushing into a brawl without a plan and just overpowering a foe. Because of this, Raphael spends much of his time honing his combat skills. It is very likely he is physically the strongest turtle. Skill Set: Vicious & Brutal Sai Master Arguably the toughest of the team Hot-headed with common fits of rage Enjoys fighting Boomstick: Also, this guy's in some serious need of anger management! “Oh?” everyone questioned. Wiz: He is naturally hot-headed and sometimes loses control of his rage. He is much more vicious than the other turtles and, at one point in the comics, even became the Shredder himself. “Ok I’ll at least admit that Dash would never do that,” Applejack said. She could never see her friend turning into one of their enemies. Raphael (90s movie version): "Damn!" Wiz: Alright the combatants are set. Let's end this debate once and for all. Boomstick: Wait a minute, Wiz, I gotta rent the latest Ninja Turtles game first. Wiz: We've have it, we just did all this research with it. Boomstick: Gamefly! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ As the trailer played out the group had to admit that they couldn’t choose a side for this one. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Boomstick: It's time for a Death Battle! Death Battle (*Cues: 1987 TMNT Sewer BGM*) In the sewers of New York, the turtles face each other and they draw their weapons. “I have a bad feeling about this,” squicked out Fluttershy. FIGHT! (*Cues: Unknown Theme*) Leonardo goes after Michelangelo and both trade blow for blow. Meanwhile, Donatello faces Raphael and Leo backflips past them. As Michelangelo attacks him, Leo stabs him with his swords, then leaps over him and slices off his arm, followed by his head. “Oh sweet celestia!” cried out a green face Spike (*Cues: Mouser Arsenal - TMNT 2K3 Game*) Don and Raph continue fighting. Both seem evenly matched until Don throws Raph past Leo. Leo tries to attack Don, but Don leaps on a stack of crates and begins hitting Leo in the head with his staff. “That's a smart plan,” commented Twilight (*Cues: Stars Align - TMNT*) Raph gets up and knocks the crates down, sending Don flying backwards onto the floor. Raph proceeds to stab Don with his sai 24 times. For lands sakes he’s your brother!!” cried Applejack. Unable to handle seeing a family literally tear each other apart. He then faces Leo, They both fight each other and Raph knocks Leo into the water. As Leo resurfaces, Raph jumps into the water. They both trade blows with their weapons. Both seem to be at a stalemate until Raph catches Leo's swords with his sais. Eventually, the sais break Leo's sword and then both stab the other. Raph, however, is stabbed in the throat while Leo's wound isn't fatal. Raphael: DAMN! Raphael falls below the surface of the water, which is coloured red by his blood. Leo sits down in the water and looks at the sai in his body. K.O.! Results (*Cues: Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (1987) - Main Theme (Rock/Metal Cover)*) Boomstick: Woah ho ho! Somebody call an ambulance! Or a vet, I don't know. “Not funny,” a downtrodden Pinkie Pie muttered out Wiz: There is a reason why Leonardo is the leader of the team. Not for strength or speed, but for strategy. Leonardo understands the strengths and weaknesses of the other turtles. His biggest threat was Raphael's sword snapping Sai, so he attacked the weakest of the group first. “Poor Mikey…” whimpered out fluttershy. Boomstick: This means Leo let Donny beat the hell outta Raph, who couldn't compete with Don's range. By the time Raph got his revenge, Leo was in way better shape for the final duel. “A cunning strategy,” Twilight said, she didn’t like it but it still was well thought out. Wiz: And I can hear all the fanboys raging "But Raph won in the movie! He should win here! Nyah nyah!" No! Four reasons. One: The result of the fight was specifically plot constructive, which is rarely accurate. Two: Leonardo absolutely decimated Raph in the fist fight beforehand. Three: Leonardo didn't want to fight at all. If he did, he would've killed Raphael right here. “Unlike now,” muttered Rainbow dash, with a downward glance. Boomstick: Tilt the blade, slide left, bam, no more Raph! Wiz: And four; That whole movie doesn't make much sense to begin with. Why should this? “True,” agreed everyone else. Boomstick: But, hey, Leo can still die from that stab, right? Wiz: Doubtful for several reasons. Turtles proportionally have smaller vital organs and far more muscle mass than humans, meaning there's little chance Raphael actually hit anything important. Leo's actually been stabbed plenty of times in the series and walked away, and all four turtles have been trained in Chi Kung and can control their breathing and heart rate to survive extreme conditions. “I guess since he’s technically a turtle his animal biology still stayed the same after they mutated,” Twilight said a bit uncertainly. Fluttershy even agreed as there wasn’t anything to suggest otherwise. Boomstick: Looks like Leo got the point of this battle. No one could even muster a reaction from that joke. It was just in poor taste. Wiz: The winner is Leonardo. END! Boomstick: Next time on Death Battle. Leo may taste victory now, but the fight is just beginning. The girls were curious that Leo was gonna fight someone else this time. His opponent appears to be some large anthropomorphic toad/frog. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ As soon as the credits started to play, twilight hit the power button, leaving the room in a awkward silence. “Um, that was nice. But i need to go back home and take care of my animal friends. And I need to pack my saddlebags,” Fluttershy quiety said as she walked towards Twilight’s front door. She felt that she should spend more time with her family, especially her younger brother. “Ya A’H think I'll head back to the farm and give Big Mack a break on the choirs, just so he and I can spend time with Apple Bloom,” muttered out applejack, as she made her way out the door. “Come Spike, I think we need to start writing some letters and when we're done we can go out for some ice cream,” suggested Twilight. Getting a slow nod from her little brother/son in all but blood, as they made their way towards the library wing of the castle. Planing on sending more leaders to her brother and sister for now on. The rest of the group also left with thoughts of spending time with their sibling’s on their minds. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ CHAPTER END! NEXT TIME ZITz VS. LEONARDO! Zitz VS LeonardoThe next day everyone met back up in the ballroom determine not to let last episode to ruin the fun that they were having and to not let it keep their moods down. “All right girls! are you ready to give this show another chance?” asked Twilight as she got everything set up for another marathon of death battle. “YEAH!” was the group agreement of her friends. With no further delay and with the encouragement of her friends, Twilight quickly hit play and sat back with her friends to enjoy the show. Interlude (*Cues: Invader - Jim Johnston*) Boomstick: Last time on Death Battle, the Ninja Turtles battled to find the deadliest of the team, and good old Leo used cunning strategy and swordplay to come out on top. “But the cost was too great,” muttered everyone. Wiz: But the fight isn't over yet. Leonardo must face his most powerful imitator, Zitz, the leader of the mighty Battletoads. “Now that's an odd name,” commented Spike. “Though not as crazy as Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles,” countered Twilight. Getting a nod from her dragon assistant. Boomstick: He's Wiz and I'm Boomstick. Wiz: And it's our job to analyze their weapons, armor, and skills to find out who would win a death battle. Zitz (*Cues: Battletoads & Double Dragon - Main Title*) Wiz: Zitz was computer engineered as one of three ultimate amphibian warriors in a gladitorial video game reality show called Battletoads. This accidentally opened a dimensional gateway to another galaxy. Every time the game began, the galaxy became the battletoad arena for their superhero war against the Dark Queen and they… “I’m getting confused,” Pinkie said while holding her head in her hooves. “Same here, sugarcube,” Applejack said getting a bit of a headache from the explanation. Boomstick: Whoa, whoa, whoa, what? “Even I’m confused,” Twilight said, not fully understanding what Wiz said. Wiz: Three nerds made a video game, got sucked through it into another galaxy, and became toad superheroes. “Ok that’s easier to understand,” Rarity said, now understanding the story. Boomstick: Yeah, got it! “Me too!” Agreed Pinkie Pie. Wiz: Zitz was originally colored yellow, to differentiate him from Rash, but he is now officially a blue-green hue. He leads the Battletoad team with a laid back yet strategic attitude. Background: Real Name: Morgan Ziegier Height: 6'8" Weight: 196 lbs. Leader & Strategist Superhuman Strength Was originally yellow, but is now blue-green “Why change his colors?” Rainbow asked, not seeing anything wrong with being yellow. “Who knows? I’m wondering how he can lead a team as a strategist with a lazy attitude,” Spike wondered. Boomstick: He chooses to go with my personal favorite battle strategy: “Boomstick has a battle strategy?” questioned a surprised Twilight along with an equally stunned group. (*Cues: Battletoads in Battlemaniacs - Ragnarok Canyon*) Boomstick: beat the shit out of everything that moves! And as a Battletoad, Zitz can shape shift his body into various weaponry: Giant fists, heavy weights, ram horns, you name it. “Of course,” Twilight facepalmed as the rest of her friends laughed. Wiz: Unlike his teammates, Zitz has used his inventive genius to mechanically advance his weaponry far beyond those of his fellow toads. By combining technology and brawn, Zitz has added blades, saws and drills to his arsenal. Shape-Shifting: Can transform body into weaponry Giant fists, boots, horns, hammers, weights, etc. Technologically Advanced Added drills, blades, saws. spikes, & dozers “Well at least he’s smart enough to improve his arsenal,” commented Rarity. “And their transformation is better than that Shang guy’s,” Rainbow said as everyone agreed with that. Boomstick: This guy could be the world's best handyman, if he always wasn't getting sucked into an alternate dimension every time someone turned on a video game. “That must be really inconvenient,” Fluttershy said. Wiz: Despite almost having no actual combat training, Zitz has proved strong enough to power through some of the toughest games ever made. And yes, the games excruciating difficulty is canon as it was specifically programmed by the Battletoads themselves. “Huh?” everyone said, wondering how that’s possible. Boomstick: Yeah, try and wrap your brain around that one. “Trying to… not working out so well,” muttered Pinkie Pie, getting a headache from thinking too much. Zitz: I'm a big bad mother of all toads! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ The group had to say even though Zitz was pretty strange, he at least had a really good chance of winning. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Leonardo (*Cues: Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (1987) - Main Theme (Rock/Metal Cover)*) Wiz: We briefly covered his abilities last episode, but there's plenty more to Leonardo. He's trained in Ninjitsu and Bushido all his life, shaping his body and mind to master close combat, swordsmanship, honor and the art of invisibility. “At least they’re not being lazy with this,” Twilight said, glad they weren’t going to repeat the same things from the last episode. Boomstick: He's also the strategist of the turtle team, who are now all dead. Sooo... yeah. Background Height: 5'2" Weight: 180 lbs. Master of Ninjitsu, Bushido, & Swordsmanship Leader and Strategist Skilled in using Environment Favorite Color: Blue. Duh. “Don’t remind us,” muttered a sadden Rarity. Getting some nods of agreement from her friends. Wiz: Leonardo is especially skilled in use of environment to outsmart and outmaneuver an opponent. He is also the only Ninja Turtle in any timeline who has studied under two masters, Splinter the rat, and the Ancient one. “He’s really is starting to sound like you Twilight,” Spike realised. Boomstick: Hey Wiz, look! It's an Asian Yoda! What? Leo wields two Ninjaken swords, which are best for swift deadly strikes and are designed with the idea that a good offense, is the best defense. They're usually mistaken as katana in the shows and comics, even though they are obviously straight, rather than curved. Ninjaken Also called Ninjato Shorter and Straighter than Katanas Designed for Quick, Deadly Strikes 2 Ft. Long Blade A Hollywood Invention Wiz: The Ninjaken is, in fact, an invention of Hollywood, as there is no historical evidence of the weapon's existence. “That weird,” Spike said. “Almost every weapon has some kind of history to it.” “Did you get that one from one of your comic’s?” teased Rainbow Dash. “No, we have a book or two on weapons and their uses in the library,” Spike said, making Rainbow shut her mouth and lightly glare at the dragon. Boomstick: Like the moon landing! “They’ve landed on their moon!?” gasped out Twilight. Wiz: Shut up! While he usually relies on his brothers' solid teamwork, he has proven to be a very effective warrior on his own too, defeating all sorts of enemies like ninja robots, giant monsters, war-torn aliens and even the Shredder. “He truly is a great warrior,” admitted Twilight as everyone agreed with her. Leonardo: (swiping his sword at a foot ninja) Gotcha. (then kicks the foot ninja) Wiz: Alright the combatants are set. Let’s end this debate once and for all. Boomstick: But first, our shameless advertisement from our friends “go” ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ As the ads started to play, everyone was quick to choose a team. On team Zitz was Spike, Pinkie and Applejack. And on leo’s team was Twilight, Rainbow, and Rarity. Fluttershy was going to be neutral on this one. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Death Battle Zitz jumps over a wire fence and walks forward as Leonardo jumps out of the sewer. Zitz turns to face his opponent. “Go Leo!” cheered Rainbow Dash. FIGHT! Zitz uses his ram horns to knock Leonardo into the fence and, as Leo bounces off, Zitz kicks him with an iron boot and then punches him away with a giant fist. Leo recovers just in time to avoid Zitz' drill attack and kicks him twice, only to get countered by a giant fist and a spiked wall. After pummeling Leo some more, Zitz throws him towards the wire fence, “Man Zitz isn't letting up!” gasped Applejack. (*Cues: I Beam Fight - TMNT*) only for Leo to flip onto his feet and defend himself from Zitz' giant fist. Leo hits Zitz twice and stabs him once, but Zitz turns into a weight to defend himself from Leo's swords. Eventually, Leo jumps into the sewer as Zitz returns to his normal form and jumps into the sewer. “He’s now in Leo’s home turf,” said Rainbow Dash. seeing that her fighter now had the home field advantage. (*Cues: Battletoads & Double Dragon - Next Level (Remix)*) As Zitz scouts around for Leo, the turtle jumps out of a hole in the wall, stabs Zitz with his sword and jumps away. Leo tries this again, but Zitz grows a chainsaw tail, which Leo dodges. Zitz gives chase and finds that Leo has disappeared. Leo jumps out of the wall and hurts Zitz. Enraged, Zitz attacks the wall that Leo jumps back into through the hole. This distraction allows Leo to swim through the water and then slice Zitz in half. “Ouch!” hissed out Rarity as she could almost feel that last one. K.O.! Results (*Cues: Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (1987) - Season 8-10 Closing Credits Theme*) Boomstick: Damn. “Ya got that right, partner,” Applejack muttered to herself. Wiz: Zitz was more than a match for Leonardo in a simple brawl, using his brutal arsenal to overpower him; But when it came to using the environment, Zitz couldn't handle Leonardo's ninja skills and his lack of training left him frustrated and unsure of what to do. “This is why ninjas are awesome. I hope we’ll get an episode on ninjas,” Rainbow yelled while pumping her hooves up in the air. “That would be super awesome. Maybe they could have magic and animal helpers,” Pinkie said, bouncing around as if the floor was a trampoline. Boomstick: While Zitz is a strategist, he always relies on his brute force and once Leo went in stealth mode and turned the tides, Zitz decided to just bring the whole sewer down. Hey, c'mon, Leo fights all kinds of mutants and monsters at least once a week. “Really? I wonder what else Leo fights,” Spike said, trying to picture the blue masked turtle fight all sorts of monsters. Wiz: Of all the toads, Zitz certainly stood the best chance with his technologically advanced weaponry, but while the Battletoads are known for accomplishing impossible odds, so are the Ninja Turtles. Leonardo made quick work of Zitz as soon as he had the chance. “Strategy and cunning wins over a short temper and brute force,” commented Twilight. Boomstick: In the end, Zitz just needed to pull himself together. "Tee hee!" giggled Pinkie Pinkie Pie Wiz: The Winner is Leonardo. Boomstick: Again. END. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Boomstick: Next time on Death Battle! The girls see a cartoonish looking Green dinosaur standing next to a giant green Pipe. “Awww~ how cute!” coed Fluttershy. But suddenly a vicious Raptor jumps out of the Pipe and roars at the poor creature, who could only whimper and curl up in fear. “Oh my gosh!!” screamed Pinkie Pie, as she grabbed the controller from Twilight’s magical grip. “Hey!” protested said mare in anger. “No time! NEXT EPISODE NOW!” yelled the party mare as she hit play. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ CHAPTER END! NEXT TIME, YOSHI VS. RIPTORE! Yoshi VS RiptorAfter the exciting episode of Leonardo and Zitz, we find our heroes in- “NO TIME FOR AN INTRO MR. NARRATOR!!” Pinkie Pie screamed, pressing play on the remote she took from Twilight. Wait what!? NO DON’T YOU DA-!! Interlude (*Cues: Invader - Jim Johnston*) Boomstick: Who doesn't like dinosaurs? No one, cause they're awesome? Wiz: Like Yoshi, Mario's happy-go-lucky steed… “So adorable,” Fluttershy said, gushing at the cute little dinosaur. Boomstick: ... and Riptor, the Dino Warrior with a Killer Instinct. “Now that’s a beast right there,” Rainbow said as Applejack and Spike nodded in agreement. Spike started to imagine himself looking like Riptor and saving Rarity. Wiz: I'm Wizard and he's Boomstick and it's our job to analyze their weapons, armor, and skills to find out who would win a Death Battle. Yoshi (*Cues: Yoshi's Island - Flower Garden Theme*) Wiz: Yoshi is a cheerful and friendly dinosaur whose race happens to be among Bowser's most hated enemies. Why? Fluttershy raised her hoof and shyly said, “Cause they're happy?” Boomstick: 'Cause they're so Goddamn happy all the time! “Hooray for happiness,” Pinkie said, waving her hooves in the air. Everyone laughed or giggled at Pinkie’s little cheer. Wiz: Yoshi is considered one of the fastest characters in the Mario universe and has a higher and stronger jump than Mario. Despite his cute and cheery demeanor, Yoshi's powerful enough to put down this goliath single-handedly. He's able to keep up with experienced fighters like Solid Snake, Link, and even previous Death Battle champion, Samus Aran. Background: Bowser's first nemesis High, strong jumps Can resist knock-back Naturally skilled in basic combat & speed Constantly followed by incredibly happy music “I doubt it,” Applejack said, thinking the critter won't last long against the giant dinosaur. “Hush, Applejack. We should see what they can do before passing judgment,” Rarity said, making her farmer friend roll her eyes. Boomstick: And either he doesn't have any ears or he's really freaken' patient, 'cause he somehow put up with that whiny-ass Baby Mario! “Awww,” everypony said as Spike pretended to gag. Baby Mario cries. “That is pretty annoying,” Spike said, not liking the baby's screech. “SPIKE. It's only a baby and it's only natural that they cry to tell us what's wrong,” Twilight said, a bit disappointed to hear her son/brother say something like that. “Sorry,” muttered Spike. Boomstick: If it were me, someone would've found him in a dumpster after the first level! Also ,while young Yoshis are dumb enough to run off cliffs, they learn quickly over time, eventually driving go-karts, playing sports and surviving the greatest death trap ever created: Mario Party! “Who in their right mind would want to attend that party?” Rarity asked, seeing some of the dangerous games being played. “Now that’s my kind of party,” Rainbow said, thinking that she and Applejack could use that for the next Iron Pony Competition. “Wonder if I should make a party like that?” Pinkie said, watching all the games closely. She's always up for new games to use during the parties she plans. Wiz: Yoshi has a large arsenal of eggs to use as lightweight projectiles and can even create a giant egg shell to use as an all-encompassing shield. Boomstick: What is it with creatures from the Mario universe using their babies as weapons? Is it that effective? I'm gonna have to test this out. Maybe some sort of Baby Launcher… Yoshi Eggs: Maneuverable Projectiles Light-Weight Can carry up to 6 eggs Different eggs create different effects Made from the souls of devoured enemies “WHAT?” everyone yelled, including Spike. “What’s with the people of that world and using their babies for battle!?” screamed Twilight in total disgust. Wiz: Boomstick! That's a terrible idea! Any time you'd want to reload, you'd have to wait nine months. Anyway, Yoshi's greatest asset is his stomach. “Wiz just lost some of my respect,” Rarity said emotionlessly, appalled at the idea of the launcher. “Though I am interested in what's so special about the little guy’s stomach,” Applejack muttered. Boomstick: Yeah, Yoshi's got a bad eating problem, and devours everything in sight with his long stretchy tongue. He can swallow almost anything, even fire. “Wow, and I thought I had a huge appetite,” Pinkie said, amazed at Yoshi's ability to eat almost anything. “And that’s saying something,”snarked Rainbow Dash. Wiz: That's right, Boomstick. Yoshi has the strangest digestive system I've ever come across. Certain meals can grant him special abilities. Otherwise, after consuming a foe or item, Yoshi...uh...ejects an egg spawned from the subject. The egg may have special properties from said object, or contain the victim within. Digestive System: Long, stretchy tongue Can eat almost anything Can get special abilities or produce eggs Can trap enemies in eggs Has Trouble swallowing Koopa Shells “H-how is that possible?” asked a confused Twilight. Boomstick: Wait, is that how he makes eggs?! Are there any female Yoshis? “That’s… a very good question,” admitted Spike. Wiz: I don't think they're male or female. Yoshis may be asexual. Boomstick: That poor miserable creature. “I’ll say…” muttered the young drake. Yoshi: "Oh ho ho, Yoshi got right stuff!" ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ While Yoshi might not win and the group had some issues with how his kind did with their kids, the group had to agree with Fluttershy. Yoshi was freaking cute. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Riptor (*Cues: Riptor's Theme - Killer Instinct*) Wiz: Riptor was genetically engineered by Ultratech to be the perfect combination of human intelligence and animal brutality. Background Height: 7' Weight: 700 lbs. Genetically Engineered Designed to be smart & Vicious, but backfired Only 4 years old, so has little combat training “Why would someone make such a monster?” gasped out Rarity. Boomstick: His tools of death are his teeth, claws and impaling tail and he knows how to use them well, pulling off insanely bloody combos. And when he's not fighting up close, he can spit a fiery acid! Combat Teeth, claws, & tail Fiery acid projectile Rushes opponents w/combos “Ok, I wouldn't want to fight that thing,” Rainbow said, holding her hooves up protectively. “Same here,” Applejack said, knowing a fight between her and this critter would end badly for her. Wiz: Riptor's only 4 years old and yet, already, he's a nearly unstoppable killing machine. Boomstick: That's one ass kicking toddler! “IT’S A BABY!?” everyone screamed, completely terrified. Wiz: He has reached a point where his human emotion and reasoning conflict with his predatory instincts, often confusing him to the blind point of rage and aggression. “So he becomes nothing but a living killing machine,” stated Twilight. Boomstick: Riptor may look, sound and act like a Velociraptor, but he's really something else entirely. He's twice as big and twice as slow and I don't think Velociraptors could shoot acid. They were awesome enough without it! With a limited amount of combat training, Riptor relies on his Raptor instincts in a fight. Raptors were pack hunters, preferring to plague their victims with stealth, speed and secrecy, though they were no pushovers by themselves. On their own, they usually just rush their opponent and overpower them with ultra combos, and if "Jurassic Park" has taught us anything, it's that Raptors are clever sons of bitches! Velociraptor Instincts Brutal & cunning First incapacitates victims Hunted in packs Stealthy Alone, they rushed & overpowered opponents The group was speechless at Boomstick’s little lesson on velociraptors. “And here i thought he wasn’t educated at all,” Rarity said, trying to process the idea of Boomstick saying something smart. “I guess even he knows a thing or two,” Applejack said, nodding dumbly at this point. Wiz: Wow, Boomstick, I didn't know you knew so much about dinosaurs. “Us too,” Spike said, still shocked at Boomstick’s speech. Boomstick: Yeah, I always wanted me a pet Raptor. I was gonna call him Barney after I found out what irony was. “Oh poor Boomstick just wanted a animal friend,” whimpered Fluttershy. Killer instinct announcer: "Supreme victory!" Riptor feasts on the remains of her prey. Wiz: Alright the combatants are set let's end this debate once and for all. Boomstick: First I need to get some money to convert my Kitten Cannon into a Baby Launcher. “Don’t you dare!” Fluttershy growled out, surprising her friends. Wiz: You've got to be kidding me. Boomstick: from Squarespace, who doesn't who necessarily has Baby Launchers. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ As the AD’s played out the girls and one drake were quick to form their teams. On team Yoshi: Fluttershy, Pinkie Pie, and Twilight. And on team Riptor: Rainbow Dash, Applejack, Rarity, and Spike. Now that the teams were set everyone went back to watching the TV right when the trailer just ended. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Boomstick: Right now, It's time for a Death Battle…ahem. Death Battle (*Cues: Overworld Theme - Super Mario World*) Yoshi is happily dancing when Riptor emerges from a pipe and roars, scaring Yoshi, who begins cowering. “Yoshi NO!” cried out a terrified Fluttershy. FIGHT! (*Cues: Yoshi's Island Theme - Super Smash Brothers Melee*) Riptor begins by attacking Yoshi repeatedly and knocking him back. Announcer: AWESOME COMBO! “WHOOO! Look at Riptor go!” cheered Rainbow Dash. As Riptor advances, Yoshi throws three eggs at her, but these do very little. Yoshi then forces out a large egg and throws it at Riptor, causing a baby Yoshi to appear. Baby Yoshi: Yoshi! Riptor attacks the baby Yoshi and bites its head off. “NOOOOO!!” everyone cried out. Yoshi screams and runs off but is stopped by a Koopa Troopa. He eats the Koopa Troopa and spits him at Riptor, who deflects it but Yoshi protects himself with his egg shield. Riptor attacks the shield until it breaks and then proceeds to attack Yoshi some more, only for Yoshi to counter. Announcer: C-C-C-C-COMBO BREAKER! “Yay! Yoshi!!” Pinkie Pie cheered, waving around some green Pom-Poms. Yoshi Ground Pounds Riptor who spits acid at him but Yoshi eats the acid and traps it in an egg. He then throws the egg at Riptor, covering her face with acid. Riptor roars in pain and tries to attack Yoshi again but Yoshi eats her and forces her out as a giant egg. As the egg falls off the cliff which Yoshi is standing next to, Riptor manages to break free, but all too late. Riptor falls down into a pink car with flame patterns on it with only her legs sticking out. K.O.! Results (*Cues: Alpina Blue - Yoshi's Story*) Boomstick: NOOO, my car! “BWAHAHAHAHA!!” laughed Rainbow Dash, along with everyone else. Wiz: Yoshi couldn't compete with Riptor's tough and brutal viciousness, but his varied arsenal ultimately produced a winning move. “Sometimes the most random of abilities can be the key to victory,” lectured Twilight. Boomstick: Riptor's a friggin' beast in a fist fight but while Yoshi looks all cute and stuff, he's actually a deadly devouring machine, like my ex-wife! “It’s not very gentlemanly to talk about a lady like that,” muttered Rarity. Wiz: That raptor mind of Riptor's might be cunning and clever but tooth and claw can only accomplish so much. Yoshi's bizarre digestive system rebounded the acid spit, blinding Riptor and leaving him vulnerable. “And also leaving the poor guy in excruciating pain,” added in Applejack. Boomstick: Riptor may be smart but Yoshi can drive cars and show me another dinosaur who can do that! “Challenge accepted!” declared Pinkie Pie. Wiz: Even with a velociraptor's strong sense of hearing and smell, Riptor's confused and vengeful mind wasn't able to process the change of tactics fast enough. Even so, he was already finished. “Oh?” everyone wondered. Boomstick: Even if that conveniently placed cliff hadn't had been there, Riptor would have lost his whole face pretty quick to the acid. He just didn't have the stomach for this dino - mite Dino - Fight. Everyone groaned at that joke. Wiz: What? Boomstick: I'm clever! “Agreed!” laughed Pinkie Pie. Wiz: The winner is Yoshi. END ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Boomstick: Next time on Death Battle. In the darkness they see a female figure. She… looks like a cat? The cat girl is standing there with her back turned. She has thick blue hair with white streaks and has white cat ears poking out of the hair. Her eyes are emerald green and has a white cat tail. The most weird feature is that she's was not wearing any clothes and is bare skin but has white fur in swirling patterns on her back, stomach, lower abdomen and breasts. Her entire forearms, hands, legs and feet are completely covered in fur and where large for her body. Then they see another figure but not much. A hoodie wearing girl who also has cat ears but her face under her hood has a sharp toothy smile and red eyes that sparkled with a weird mix bloodlust and innocents. The Cat Girl turns to the audience. Cat Girl: Meow! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ “Umm could we start the next episode right now?” asked a red face Spike, trying to act like he wasn’t really as interested as he actually was. The girls could only giggle at the young drake’s attempt to playing cool, resulting in Spike’s blush to grow even brighter almost making his head look like a cherry. Feeling like her number one assistant was embarrassed enough as it is, decided to hit play and spare him anymore embarrassment. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ CHAPTER END! NEXT TIME Felicia VS Taokaka Felicia VS TaokakaWe see our group of watchers seated in front of the television, preparing to finish the finale episode of the day. “Sorry but we're skipping this intro as well,” interrupted Pinkie Pie yet again. Wait what!? NO, NOT AGAIN YOU LITTLE PINK SH- Interlude (*Cues: Invader - Jim Johnston*) Boomstick: Catfight! “Oh dear celestia,” muttered Rarity. Wiz: It literally is Boomstick. Not only do we have two ferocious females in the ring today, but they're also, well, cats. Boomstick: Felicia, the popstar demon cat chick lady. “A demon?” Twilight questioned. Wiz: And Taokaka, BlazBlue's speedy vigilante. Boomstick: He´s Wiz and I´m Boomstick... Wiz: And it´s our job to analyze their weapons, armour and skills to find out who would win a DEATH BATTLE. Felicia (*Cues: Felicia's Theme - Marvel vs Capcom 3*) Wiz: As a catwoman, Felicia faced discrimination all her life. She was raised by a nun and became a successful pop-star, a passion that would ultimately lead her on a quest to bring humans and cat-people together to make children happy. Background: Height: 5'6" Weight: 128 lbs. Raised by a nun Happy-Go-Lucky attitude Superhuman Strength, Speed, & Endurance “She wants to have her kind accepted?” Twilight said, impressed by the cat-woman’s goal. “And she just wants to make children happy,” Fluttershy quietly said, wishing she could meet her. “That’s a noble goal for her,” Rarity said, dabbing a handkerchief under her eyes. Hearing about Felicia’s goals brought some tears to her eyes. Boomstick: What the hell? I thought we were talking about a deadly demon warrior and... is she naked?! This gave the girls and dragon something to think about. Is she classified as naked. Wiz: Yes. “Ok?” Rainbow said, unsure what else to say. Boomstick: But, she's a cat. “Is he going were I think he’s going?” Rarity asked, feeling very uncomfortable. Wiz: Yes… “We know that. Is Boomstick trying to go somewhere with this?” Applejack said, trying to understand Boomstick’s questions. Boomstick: Hmmm... do you think it'd be wrong to- “OH good god, Boomstick!” Twilight screamed as she covered Spike ears. Much too young drakes annoyance Wiz: Yes! Felicia is a Darkstalker, a creature of the night, and naturally possesses supernatural strength, speed and agility. She can also use her unique cat senses to sniff out enemies from extreme distances. “She sure beats wynona's nose,” commented Applejack. Boomstick: She can tear into her foes with the sharp claws restin' in her big-ass paws, each several inches long and capable of tearing through all kinds of armor. “Those would cause some damage,” Rainbow said, eyeing those long pink nails. “She must take very special care of her nails,” Rarity said, wondering what products she uses if any at all. Wiz: To top it off her tail is extremely strong, able to lift her entire body on its own. She's undeniably one of the faster darkstalkers, and can get around the battlefield with her unpredictable Rolling Smash, Delta Kicks and Rolling Buckler. Combat: Long, Pink Claws Strong Tail Speed-Based Combo High-Damaging Grapples Can charge Energy at will Natural Athlete Special Moves: Rolling Smash Delta Kick/Cat Spike Hell Cat Grapple Rolling Buckler Links to Various Attacks Sandsplash: Short Range Low-Middle Height Also called Litter Box Kick “Ah ya! Speed for the win!” cheered Rainbow Dash, voice full of pride. Boomstick (Singing): Felicia... she can really move... Felicia... she's got an attitu-ude- (*Cues: Night Warriors Darkstalker' Revenge: The Animated Series - Intro Theme Instrumental*) Wiz: Yes Boomstick, we get it, she's like Sonic. Anyway, as a darkstalker, Felicia has a natural affinity for magic, able to use it in the form of her only ranged attack: kicking sand “Kicking sand… really?” Deadpanned Twilight. “I wanna know who this Sonic dude is,” said Rainbow Dash. wondering why the name struck a chord with her. Boomstick: At least she's litter box trained “Is that a racist remark?” Rainbow asked her knowledgable friend. Twilight simply shrugged her shoulders, unsure of the answer to that. Wiz: As she was raised by a nun, even becoming one herself, she has little to no combat training, preferring to focus on her singing career and running an orphanage. As such, she relies on her lethal feral instincts in a fight. “That could lead her to losing this match.” remarked Applejack. Boomstick: But these same instincts also lead her to be easily distracted by ferocious enemies like butterflies, rolling balls of yarn and paper that crinkles. “That’s really sad ….Oh a bit,” Pinkie said, reaching for the shiny bit on the floor. Wiz: The other darkstalkers consider Felicia to be one of the weakest of their kind, but with the help from her friends, she somehow manages to hold her own against demon lords, spell casters and all-powerful aliens. “That’s quite the list she’s got there,” Rarity exclaimed, liking that the cat-woman wasn’t some push over. Boomstick: That's one cat you don't want to cross. Felicia: I sure could use a catnap. Felicia then turns into her cat form. “Awww kitty!” cooed Fluttershy. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ The group had to admit that Felicia was a good person and a strong warrior. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Taokaka (*Cues: Catus Carnival - BlazBlue Calamity Trigger*) Boomstick: That chick wearing a cat hoodie? “Looks like it to me,” Rainbow said, taking a bite out of a cupcake. Wiz: No, that's a special cloak to fit her Kaka body. “Cough cough,” Rainbow started to choke on her cupcake as Applejack slapped her back. The hit caused Rainbow to cough up the cupcakes as she said, “WHAT!” Boomstick: Her what body? Wiz: Taokaka is a vigilante of the Kaka tribe, a catlike people descended from genetically engineered living weapons. Her genetics, provide her with a natural fighting instinct. She is the guardian of the Kaka, implying that she is the best fighter of the group. Background: Height: 5'5" Weight: 93 lbs. Descended from Genetically Engineered Weapons Guardian & Vigilante Incredibly Stupid “Well it’s good that she uses her strength for her home and her people,” said Twilight. Boomstick: While she may be a good fighter, she's one dumb cat. “What?” everyone questioned, confused with boomsticks remark. Wiz: Unfortunately, Tao has an incredibly severe case of ADHD. While she hunts bounties with the intent of improving her fighting skill and bringing money to her family, she often winds up completely forgetting about her mission at the worst of times, often even befriending her would-be targets. Everyone facepalmed at the tidbit of information. Boomstick: She has twelve retractable dual-edged blades on her hands and feet. While they´re not very long, they can transform from basic claws to hook-size and saw-blades. Damn, I don´t even want to think what those things would do to my couch. Combat: Total of 12 Retractable Razor-Sharp Blades Speed-Based Combos Expert Air Control 'Dancing Edge' Drive is Extremely Fast Seithr: Uses Instinctively Uses for Special Attacks 3 Powerful Fast, Distortion Drives Astral Heat Limited Amount Available Rarity shuddered at the thought. Knowing how bad it is with just opal causing her furniture unneeded damage. Wiz: Tao's genes allow her to instinctively access and utilize Seithr: a raw, powerful energy seething through the air. Tao can use Seithr to empower and transform her claws, as well as to execute incredibly vicious attacks. However, there is only so much Seithr in a given space, and once she runs out, Tao will lose many of her deadliest attributes. Boomstick: Also, apparently Tao likes to carry around a lot of random shit, which she then uses as projectiles during a fight: bowling balls, apple cores, pillo-- a pillow? Really!? “Oh, wonder if I can do that?” Pinkie asked, grabbing a pillow. With the pillow in her hooves, she moved her hooves to the side and somehow cocked it like a gun. Wiz: She's the fastest of the BlazBlue cast, darting around the arena with incredibly fast combos. However, she's also the weakest stamina-wise and doesn't have very many defensive options. “She’s like a glass cannon,” Twilight said, letting everyone know what Wiz meant. Boomstick: But, if you want to kick her ass, you gotta catch her first! Taokaka: Aah! It's the boobie lady! Wiz: Alright the combatants are set. Let's end this debate once and for all. Boomstick: After the thing people bitch about in the comments. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ As the ads roll, the girls and dragon were discussing on who they would be rooting for. For Team Felica, we had Fluttershy, Spike, Rarity and Twilight. As Applejack, Rainbow Dash and Pinkie were for Team Toakaka. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Boomstick: It's time for a Death Battle. Death Battle (*Cues: Darkstalkers 3 - Felicia's Ending Theme*) On a wooden bridge, a pink butterfly flies toward Felicia, who is wearing her nun attire and is watering plants. Felicia notices it and takes off her robes, then begins following it. She then leaps at it four times before accidentally bumping into Taokaka. Felicia jumps back while Taokaka is agitated. Taokaka: Alright! “CAT FIGHT!” cheered Spike. FIGHT! (*Cues: Calamity Trigger - BlazBlue Calamity Trigger*) Taokaka charges at Felicia, unleashing a long combo before knocking her into the air, then slamming her into the ground with her hook claws. She charges again when Felicia uses her rolling smash to jump onto her attacker, then unleashes a combo of her own. Felicia then knocks Taokaka into the air, jumps upward, slashes her a few times before grabbing her and throwing her to the ground. Felicia lands and Taokaka attempts to counter, but her attack is blocked, leaving her wide open to Felicia's delta kick. Felicia then uses rolling smash and moves back and forth, hitting Taokaka repeatedly before she jumps upward and catches Felicia. Taokaka proceeds to stab Felicia multiple times with her claws before Felicia completely reverses it with her hell cat grapple, concluding by throwing Taokaka. Taokaka: Boing! Taokaka has her hands on the ground and her tail in the air while Felicia in her fighting stance as well. “This is getting intense,” muttered Rainbow Dash, as she leaned in further to watch the insane fight. (*Cues Felicia's Darkstalkers 3 Ending Theme again*) Then the butterfly from before returns, grabbing both of their attention. The two repeatedly leap at it and as the butterfly approaches Felicia, Taokaka slashes it with her claws. “Are they… “ trailed of Rarity. Lost for words. “Eyup!” replied Applejack. Taokaka: Whoops! Felicia is upset. Felicia: No, no, no! Felicia then lunges at Taokaka, letting out a cat-like roar, and unleashes a combo on her. The two trade combos until Taokaka is slashing at thin air, forgetting where Felicia is. Felicia lands on “SHIT!” cursed a surprise Rainbow Dash. Taokaka and slashes at her face before knocking her back with a kick. Taokaka gets into a one-legged stance when Felicia uses rolling smash. She catches Felicia off-guard using her saw blades, knocking her back. Felicia uses sandsplash, but to no avail as Taokaka jumps right over it, trapping her in a combo and knocking Felicia into the air. She strikes Felicia multiple times, keeping her in the air, then lands. Taokaka then takes out her claws and jumps upward. Taokaka: Taokaka boom! The strike is so devastating that it slices Felicia in half, seperating her top and bottom halfs of her body. Taokaka is then shown dancing. K.O.!. Taokaka: Nya ha, nya ha, nya ha! Taokaka then sits down on the ground. Taokaka: Now I'm bored. Results (*Cues: Bright - BlazBlue*) Boomstick: Felicia just got put down! “Poor Miss Felicia,” Rarity said, feeling sad that a kind soul lost the fight. Fluttershy lowered her head, trying to head the tears threatening to run down her face. The thought of Felicia not being there for the children was heartbreaking for soft spoken mare. Wiz: But this one was very close; based on their move sets, Tao appeared to have a slight speed advantage. Though, Felicia had the endurance of a Dark Stalker, Tao's superior agility eventually gave her the win. “Speed does tend to beat endurance sometimes,” Twilight said, knowing it first hand. “Ponies like me and Tao can dish out damage faster than our opponents can handle,” bragged Rainbow Dash. Boomstick: Not to mention she's got freakin' razorblades for claws! Felicia just took her final meow. “That joke was CATastrophe!” giggled out Pinkie Pie, getting a frustrated sigh from all her friends. Wiz: The winner is Taokaka. END. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Boomstick: Next time on Death Battle! (cue God of War III Theme) The girls were awed as they see a masculine figure standing under a raging storm, they can hardly see him. The camera changes and they see up close to his face; All they see is an angry and avenging with a hint of bloodlust look in the the fiery eyes he displays which also intimidates the girls and had spike hide behind a equally scared Twilight. Then they see a male figure shrouded by a red cape and he's wearing a skintight, black suit, with white streaks on the chest and mask. The suit is also decorated with chains, spikes and skulls giving him a deadly appearance.. The music indicates these two fighters are cold blooded killers even destroyer of worlds. The title says it all. Kratos vs Spawn ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ “Hooo wee! That was a fun episode,” Applejack said, taking off her hat to wipe her brow. “I’ll say. It was awesome to see characters use their speed in a fight,” Rainbow Dash said, hovering in the air while throwing a few punches. “I sure wish we could learn a little bit more about them though,” Fluttershy quietly added in. getting nod of agreements from everyone. Suddenly a bright light started to shine from the corner of the room right where twilight placed the box that once contained the Death Battle DVDs. “What in tarnations!” Applejack said, getting ready to fight if she needed to. “Whatever it is, it needs to cut it out!” And as soon as the light started it ended just as quickly, leaving the group confused on what just happened. “Is that supposed to happen Twilight?” asked a scared Fluttershy. “Well only way to find out!” yelled Pinkie as she ignored the screams of protest from her friends as she tore the box open. She looked inside the box in silence. “Ooooh! Guy’s you need to take a look at this!” yelled the party pony, as she started to dig through the box. “What is it, darling? More dvds?” Rarity asked, curious of what’s inside the box. “Nope! Even better!” cheered the pink pony, still having half of her body inside the box. “Are those comics?” Twilight asked, squinting her eyes a bit. Next to her, Spike had a huge smile on his face when comics were mentioned. “And posters. There’s even a Haggar one,” Pinkie said, holding a large poster of said wrestler on it. The girls walked towards the box and took a look inside. “Oh my, there seems to be comics on each of the contestants of the show,” Rarity said while pulling out a stack of Darkstalkers comics. “Awesome. There’s some on the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles,” Rainbow excitedly said, holding a huge stack of TMNT comics. “You gotta let me read them once I’m done,” Pinkie said, balancing some Wonder Woman comics on her head. “Um, I’ll read these if nopony minds,” Fluttershy stuttered, holding a moderately sized stack of Mario comic with Yoshi on the cover. “I’m gonna enjoy these,” Applejack said, holding a few Street Fighter comics. “As will I,” Twilight said, levitating a few Metroid mangas out of the box. “I wonder If we’ll get anything else if we continue watching the show?” The others look at her curiously as Spike searches through the box for any comics he could read. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Chapter end- Next time: Kratos vs Spawn Kratos VS Spawn.The next day we find our group of young watcher at the ballroom yet again, but this time yet again they are accompanied by the two rulers of Equestria. Princess Celestia and Princess Luna were able to make time out of their busy schedules to watch a few more episodes of Death Battle with their young friends. “Thanks for the intro Mr. narrator,” whispered Pinkie Pie. No problem. “I’m glad you two could join us again,”Twilight said with a smile. Happy to be able to spend time with her mentor again. “Me and my sister will always make time for our friends,” Celestia said as she gave her former apprentice a quick nuzzle. One that Twilight was more then happy to return. “Agreed! We also appreciate that you're willing to share the gifts that you all got from the magic box,” added in Luna as she waved around her new street fighter comics. Even Celestia quickly put away her poster of haggar while sporting a small blush. “Well let’s start the next batch of episodes!” said Twilight, getting some cheers of agreement from her friends. Interlude (*Cues: Invader - Jim Johnston*) Wiz: Of all the warriors who have entered this arena, none can compete with these two titans of death. Kratos, the Ghost of Sparta who single-handedly annihilated Olympus… “This Kratos sounds like a powerful warrior,” Luna said, thinking of the few battles from a thousand years ago. Celestia had a slight flashback to her fight with Knightmare Moon but shook her head to rid her of those thoughts. Boomstick: ...and Spawn, who managed to dethrone both Satan and God. “He must have be powerful to defeat a god,” Rarity said, trying to imagine someone with that kind of power. Wiz: I'm Wizard and he's Boomstick, and it's our job to analyze their weapons, armor, and skills to find out who would win a Death Battle. Kratos (*Cues: God Of War III - Brothers Of Blood *) Wiz: Kratos is a demigod, raised among the Spartans as their greatest warrior, until one day, his people were threatened to be overrun. It was then he stuck a deal with Ares, the God of War. Ares would give him the strength to protect his people; in return, Kratos would serve as Ares' champion warrior. “I’m not sure how I feel about this?” Background Over 6' Tall A Spartan Warrior Hold the Rank of Captain Self-Centered Anti-Hero Superhuman Strength, Speed, & Endurance Boomstick: Kratos became super-powerful and really vicious, but was tricked by Ares into killing his own family. But hey, he saved some money on child support and divorce! “Not. Funny,” Everyone growled out, even the princesses thought the joke was very poor in taste. Wiz: As the white, hot ashes of his family clung permanently to his skin- Boomstick: Just like Michael Jackson! Wiz: -his quest for vengeance against the gods of Olympus began. As a demigod, Kratos possesses great strength, speed, and endurance. He can survive a pummeling from a Titan and best the power of Hercules. “He went up against that?” Rainbow yelled, surprised at seeing Kratos fighting the giant titan. “You’d have to be crazy to try that, Rainbow,” Applejack said, not liking how easily the so called ghost defeats his enemies with ease. Boomstick: Kratos wields the Blades of Exile, twin short swords bound to his arms by chains. The blades have a hook design that Kratos can use to cut right through his enemies, or snag them and whip 'em around. Blades of Exile Dual Short Swords Wielded with Chains Seared to Arms Hooked Design Made from the Remains of the Blades of Athena (*Cues: Kratos' Theme - God of War*) Boomstick: And like most badass weapons, they can somehow emit fire. “I would so want those,” Spike said, awed by the design and the fire. He imagined himself using those swords the beat some diamond dogs and saving Rarity from them. “Even if it meant having them bound to your arms?” Celestia asked in her motherly tone, causing Spike to think about it before shaking his head. “Naw! I’ll settle with my own fire,” replied spike. Wiz: Kratos is well trained in sword combat and possesses what may be the most powerful sword the Greek gods have to offer - the Blade of Olympus. Everyone could only marvel at the beautifully made blade. Boomstick: After Kratos killed Ares, Uhhh, spoiler!, he was made the God of War. But Zeus tricked him into putting all his godly powers into this sword, making him mortal once again. “At least he got his revenge,” Twilight said, feeling a little conflicted on whether or not it’s a good thing or not that was a good thing. “Look at it this way Twi, he’s not under Ares’s control anymore,” Rainbow said, making Twilight agree with it. Wiz: And making the Blade of Olympus a deadly harbinger of death to even the toughest Olympians. His most versatile defense is his Golden Fleece, armor capable of blocking powerful blows and deflecting magical attacks. Blade of Olympus Can Kill Gods & Titans Contains God Powers Fires Blue Energy Waves About 5 Feet Long “A weapon that can even kill these greek gods? That wasn’t a smart thing to do,” Rarity said, not understanding why they would try to do that. Kratos was able to kill a god, it wasn’t like he couldn’t do it again. Golden Fleece Gold Armlet Blocks Attacks Deflects Projectiles & Magical Attacks Strong Enough to Counter the Blade of Olympus “That would have helped during the changeling invasion,” Celestia said, wishing she could have reflected that one blast back at Queen Chrysalis. Boomstick: But there's a whole lot more to this guy's arsenal, like the Bow of Apollo, which can shoot a rapid stream of arrows or charge up deadly fire arrows. “Almost sounds like a bow starswirl tried to make one time,” commented Celestia. “Really!? How did that turn out?” asked Twilight. Interested on how a project from her hero worked out. “The results were… explosive,” muttered out celestia. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Flashback 1500 years ago ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ “What in Tartarus name happened Starswirl!?” Screamed Celestia. While pointed towards the now burning castle. As her servants and sister trying tried their best to put out the flames. “I can fix this! I can fix this!” yelled Starswirl in fright. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Bow of Apollo Can Rapid-Fire Arrows Charged Fire Arrows Does Not Drain Kratos' Magic Limit Quick with a Long Range Wiz: Then there's the Claws of Hades, which mercilessly rip the souls out of their victims, though tough opponents like Kratos can resist them. Claws of Hades Used like Blades of Exile Spiked Chains & Hooks Rips Souls from Victims Can be Resisted Can Summon Souls “That’s a pretty scary weapon,” Fluttershy stuttered, feeling scared of a weapon that can rip a soul from the body. “Scary isn’t the word I’d use,” Twilight said, wondering who would make such a evil weapon. “It seems like something that Sombra would have used,” Celestia muttered just loud enough for her sister to hear. Luna silently nodded as Sombra would use this weapon without hesitation. Boomstick: The Nemean Cestus are giant ultra-strong gauntlets which can stun foes with brutal shockwaves. Nemean Cestus Giant Metal Gauntlets Lion-Like Appearance Originally Owned by Hercules Incredibly Strong Can Create Shockwaves which Stun Foes “Wonder if those could help he harvest more apples?” Applejack asked, thinking the shockwaves they make could hit a couple of trees at once. Wiz: The Boots of Hermes give him superhuman speed, and when battling the infamous Icarus, he ripped those huge wings off the old fool's back and took them for his own, giving him powers of flight. “He ripped the wings off the guy? That’s brutal,” Rainbow said, hugging herself with her wings. Fluttershy could only whimper in response. Boots of Hermes Greaves with Small Wings Improved Running Speed Can Run Up Walls Icarus Wings Can Glide & Fly Huge 18' Wingspan Slowly Falls Apart During Flight Ripped From Icarus' Back Boomstick: Holy crap, that's a lot of weapons! I like this guy! “He’s the very definition of overkill,” Snarked Rarity. Wiz: Kratos is not invincible, but he is very difficult to kill. Boomstick: Hell, he can't even kill himself! The group winced at the image of Kratos stabbing himself with the Blade of Olympus. Wiz: In his rage, he tore apart the ranks of Mount Olympus and slaughtered every god upon and below it... except for Aphrodite. Boomstick: For obvious reasons! “Sigh… dammit Boomstick,” muttered Rarity in frustration. Wiz: In doing so, he ultimately brought about the end of the world. Without the power of the gods to keep the chaos in check, the apocalypse had arrived, and its vanguard was Kratos. Ares: I was trying to make you a great warrior. Kratos: You succeeded. Kratos impales Ares with the with his sword. Spawn (*Cues: Spawn in the Demon's Hand - Opening Sequence (Arcade Version)*) Wiz: Al Simmons was trained to be a deadly, stealthy soldier and assassin, and proved numerous times he was the best of the best. But when his morality got the better of him, his boss terminated his contract... permanently. Background Height: 6'2" Weight: 450 lbs. Skilled Assassin Superhuman Strength, Speed, & Durability Composed of Necroplasm Regeneration Healing “My word. That’s horrible,” Rarity cried out, thinking of how horrible it must be to die and look like that. Boomstick: That's when Simmons met Malebolgia, one of the Demon Lords of Hell, who struck a deal with him: He'd get to see his wife again if he became captain of Hell's armies. He agreed and was reborn as a Hellspawn. But as with most Demons, it tricked him, leaving Spawn with a fate worse than death. And of course, Spawn swore revenge! “Poor thing,” cried out Fluttershy. (*Cues: Spawn The Eternal - Track 6*) Wiz: Being a Hellspawn, he has superhuman strength and speed. He is nearly invulnerable and can use his own powers to heal and regenerate. Boomstick: In addition, Spawn can feed off the evil auras of others for the same effect. It really saves him on Band-Aids! Wiz: He wears a living parasitic-symbiotic suit named Leetha of the 7th House of K. Leetha of the 7th House of K Symbiotic Suit Limited by Imagination Can Create Chains, Spikes, Claws, Shrouds, etc. Has a Mind of its own Feeds off Necroplasm or Natural Evil Energies Boomstick: Leetha has ridiculous powers. Basically, anything she or Spawn wants to happen can happen. The suit can create and control chains, claws, spikes, and morph itself into pretty much anything Spawn wants, like a badass cape that can drag enemies and protect Spawn from all sorts of danger. “Wow, that suit sounds useful,” Pinkie said, wondering if the suit comes in pink. “I’m not sure if that suit is evil or not,” Twilight muttered to herself. Wiz: The suit has a mind of its own, and can operate while Spawn focuses on other parts of the battle. It is strong enough to easily smash through brick, and fast enough to block bullets. However, Leetha feeds off necroplasm energy when using the suit's powers, a hellish matter which Spawn is entirely composed of. If Leetha uses too much, Spawn will be sent back to Hell. However, like Spawn, Leetha can also feed off the evil and sin of others. “Well, that’s good?” Fluttershy said, thinking that it helps Spawn fight monsters. Boomstick: Spawn's also got tons of magic powers. He can teleport, transform, blow things up, turn invisible, alter matter, talk to animals, fly with his cape, read minds, and open portals to Heaven and Hell. Ho-oly crap! Magic Can alter matter Communicate with animals Flight & Teleportation Necroplasm Projection Healing the sick & even resurrecting the dead Elemental Control “H-He can do all that?” Twilight stuttered, knowing she has a hard time using more than half the stuff on the list. “So we found a guy better than you in magic?” Spike asked, smiling at his friend/sister/mother. “Now spike, no teasing.” Celestia chasted. Wiz: And he can control the elements, often using fire and water to defeat swarms of enemies. However, even with all these godlike abilities, Spawn usually resorts to his most primitive weapon. As he was trained in Special Forces for so long, Spawn is most comfortable using a gun. He is an expert in the use of nearly any firearm imaginable. Expert Marksman Weapon of Choice Least Effective Weapons Skilled with all types “At least he doesn’t solely rely on his magic alone,” Rarity said, knowing many do learn anything outside their craft. “Tis a lesson many can learn from,” Luna said in agreement. Boomstick: Only two things can break through Spawn's defenses and hurt him: Necro-magic and holy weapons forged in Heaven. In addition, he can only die if he's beheaded. “Decapitation!!!” sang out Pinkie Pie in a bloody scream, that would make a certain roady proud. Specific Weaknesses Magic Necroplasm Holy Weapons forged in Heaven His Dwindling amount of Necroplasm Can only die through Beheading “Those are quite specific weaknesses he has,” Applejack said, wondering if Kratos can even stand a chance to Spawn. Wiz: Spawn killed all sorts of powerful enemies - assassins, cyborgs, vampires, ghosts, Angels, Demons, other Hellspawn, rampaging deities, even Satan and God. Yes, that old lady is the God. Boomstick: Really? God looks like my nanna... Am I a demigod? “Harmony I hope not,” begged Rarity, feeling sorry for whatever fools worship him. Wiz: And after being granted unlimited power from the Mother of all things, Spawn banished God and Satan from the Earth, which he wiped clean and rebuilt in his own image. He then willingly sacrificed his own God powers and eventually returned to his Hellspawn form. Boomstick: Ah, why the hell would he do that! He must've been really bored! “There are more things than power boomstick,” lectured Twilight. Spawn blows up a wall. Spawn: Knock, knock! “Who’s there?” giggled Pinkie Pie. Wiz: Alright the combatants are set. Let's end this debate once and for all. Boomstick: But first, let's take your commerical break from Jackthreads. Over you, Boomstick! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ As the ads started to everyone decided to be neutral on this one. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Boomstick: It's time for a Death Battle Death Battle (*Cues: God Of War II - Colossus of Rhodes*) In an ancient underground palace lit by torchlight, Kratos marches up a staircase before turning around to see Spawn appear in a flash of green flame behind him, whipping out his Blades of Exile. “Here we go,” muttered Twilight. FIGHT! (*Cues: God Of War III - Poseidon's Wrath*) Spawn doesn't move a muscle as Leetha summons several chains to attack Kratos, which he blocks and slices through for a few moments. Eventually, Spawn pulls a large gun and starts shooting Kratos, who defends himself by crossing the Blades in front of him. He quickly swipes a Blade to disarm Spawn, but misses his next swing as Spawn teleports behind him, landing a blow before getting stabbed by a Blade. He is dragged forward only to be kicked back by Kratos. “Already getting bloody,” commented Celestia. Spawn lands at the foot of the stairs and barely dodges a leaping attack by Kratos. He follows Spawn into the next room, but doesn't see his opponent. (*Cues: Spawn in the Demon's Hand - Smelter (Admonisher Stage)*) Spawn lowers his invisibility and leaps from the wall he was hanging on the kick at Kratos. Spawn's punches send Kratos airborne, then uses his teleportation and speed to deliver more blows to get Kratos flying. “Whooo” cheered Rainbow Dash. Flying quickly, Spawn sees Kratos at the foot of another staircase, and hurls a ball of energy at Kratos, which he sends back at Spawn. Kratos hooks Spawn and brings him down the stairs, then uses his Nemean Cestus to knock Spawn into the next room. “This is getting brutal,” muttered Applejack. The blow's force pushes Spawn to the edge of a gap between two sections, which he floats over as Kratos reaches him, laughing and shooting more energy blasts at Kratos. He deflects them away with the Golden Fleece before summoning the Icarus Wings and tackling Spawn to the other side. While Kratos hangs on the ledge, Spawn leaps up and prepares to deliver a blow with the line "You're pissing me off" just as Kratos grabs him with the Blades and they both fall into the pit. (*Cues: God Of War - Minotaur Boss Battle*) The two land safely at the bottom, Kratos pulling out the Bow of Apollo and shooting arrows at Spawn behind the defense of his cape, finally charging up the next arrow. Spawn uses his elemental control to make the flame engulf Kratos, then launches a necroplasm grenade in the fire, exploding in bursts of smoke. “Such power,” gasped out Luna. (*Cues: God Of War III - Overture*) Kratos, however, jumps from the blaze with the Blade of Olympus in hand, nearly striking the teleporting Spawn, then easily cutting through Leetha's chains and stabbing Spawn through the chest. He remains still for a moment before teleporting off the Blade, behind Kratos, and holding him in the air by his head, draining his evil energy in a flash of green. “That doesn't look good,” whimpered out Fluttershy. Spawn: DIE! Spawn then creates a large spike in his hand through Kratos' head, killing the Ghost of Sparta. Everyone winced at the brutal display and Spike had to rush to one of the bathrooms. K.O.! Results (*Cues: Unknown Theme*) Boomstick: Aaahhhh, man - here's comes the rage from the God of War fanboys! “(shiver.) Fanboys…” shuddered Rainbow Dash. She saw the horror that was know as fanboys while at a Wonderbolts race and a Daring Doo convention. At least she had a good friend that one time who wasn’t that bad. Wiz: Kratos is a very difficult one to beat, but Spawn's magical prowess and near-indestructible body proved too much for him. Boomstick: Yeah, normally, that last attack would've meant the end for his opponent, but not Spawn! “Only decapitation can truly kill spawn,” added in Luna. Wiz: And while much of Kratos' arsenal was forged by Olympians, Olympus is composed of Earthly elements, and is not another plane of existence like Heaven, so it stands to reason none of the Olympian weapons would kill Spawn. Boomstick: Except the Blade of Olympus, but it wasn't enough. “So Kratos was doomed from the start,” muttered Applejack. Wiz: Plus, Spawn and his suit had plenty of evil energy to feed on during the fight, since Kratos is literally covered in his past sins. “With such large source of sin there was no way spawn could lose,” Twilight realised. Boomstick: Well, that was one Hell of a fight! “Well it seems boomstick joke didn’t get better from the last time we were here,” drawled out Luna. Wiz: The winner is Spawn. END. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Boomstick: Next time on Death Battle. Slayer of Dragons This caught the groups attention, especially a young drakes, who gulped nervously Explosion Extraordinaire This one caught Pinkie’s attention, if her jumping up and down with a huge grin was any indication. The group wondered who this two fighters where and what beings of such titles would look like. They are… two funny looking characters that you would never guess where a slayer of dragons or a bomb expert . everyone had their jaws dropped, not in awe, but shock. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ “Well that truly was an intense battle,” commented Celestia. Wiping her brow from the instance showdown she just witness. “I have to agree with you there sister.” agreed Luna. “I’m just happy we don’t have to worry about a being like Kratos rampaging around our lands,” said Celestia in relief. Getting a nod from Luna, both happy that they didn’t have to fear a being that would stop at nothing to kill them and everything they built for. “PRINCESSES!!!” yelled a gruff voice that surprised the two royal sisters and caused them to turn towards where the voice came from. But as soon as they did they came face to face with the very person they were talking about. The ghost of sparda himself, Kratos! “AAAAAAAHHHHHHH,” the princesses screamed as they began to feel a little light headed as the room was spinning. The next moment they saw nothing but a black void as they passed out. A familiar voice started to giggle and said, “Look what the magic box gave us, it’s a full budy standee of Kra-Kra. Isn’t it cool?” A familiar pink furred and pink maned face popped out from the side of the standee and asked, “Princesses? You okay?” The only response she got where her friends facepalming. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Chapter end! Next time Bomberman VS Dig Dug. Bomberman VS Dig Dug.After they were able to awaken the two sisters and were able to have Pinkie Pie apologize for scaring them, everyone sat back down and watch the next episode. “That was a pretty lazy into Mr. author,” Pinkie Pie scolded. Bite me. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Interlude (*Cues: Invader - Jim Johnston*) Wiz: Today, two experts of destruction and masters of terrain will fight to the bitter end. Boomstick: White Bomber, the Bomberman... Wiz: And Taizo Hori, aka Dig Dug. Boomstick: He's Wiz and I'm Boomstick. Wiz: And it's our jobs to analyze their weapons, armour and skills to find out who would win a Death Battle. Bomberman (*Cues: Unknown Theme*) Boomstick: Bomberman is a psychopathic cyborg slave forced to duel other slaves to the death in dimly-lit maze-like arenas for the entertainment of alien terrorists. “Holy cow!! That’s so awesome!!” cheered rainbow dash. Completely floored that the lame looking creature could be so cool. Wiz: No, no, not that Bomberman, Boomstick. “Awww…” moned everyone in disappointment, all except Fluttershy who sighed in relief. (*Cues: Classic Mode/Standard Battle (Original) - Bomberman Generation*) Wiz: White Bomber, the Bomberman, an alien robot warrior from the planet Bomber who belongs to an intergalactic police force protecting the galaxy. “So this fellas a space cop?” questioned Applejack Boomstick: Oh... well, his method of saving those planets is blowing the shit out of them, so he's alright with me. “B-but how is that saving anyone!?” screamed Twilight. Wiz: Right! Bomberman cares little for the environment he is supposedly protecting, making him an unpredictable opponent. “Doesn't seem like the kind of person we would have upholding the law,” commented Celestia. Getting a nod of agreement from her sister and from everyone else. But no one notice pinkie pie looking out of the ballroom window, then sneaking out the door while everyone was distracted by the show. Background: Alien Robot Warrior Generate Bombs Defender of the Galaxy Uses explosives to save helpless planets Young & Naive Boomstick: Bomberman's answer to every problem is... explosions! Got a locked door? Blow it up! Behind on taxes? Blow them up! Have a naggy wife? Blow her ass up too! His arsenal consists of bombs, bombs, and more bombs, which usually take about two or three seconds to detonate. And while the explosions start off small, they can be upgraded to destroy an entire acre all at once. Plus, he can charge a bomb up to over four times its size for maximum destruction. Bombs: 2-3 second detonation Cannot be defused Upgradeable Can be kicked or thrown Can be powered up by being held “Those are some truly dangerous weapons,” said Luna Wiz: While blasting his way through planet after planet, Bomberman finds numerous power-ups buried beneath the earth. “I hope that's not the reason why he ends up blowing up planets,” Rarity said. Hoping that the bomberman was not killing off planets just to get more power. (*Cues: Battle Game - Bomberman Jetters*) Wiz: Bomb Up gives him extra bombs, Accelerator increases his running speed, Armor gives him temporary immunity, the Explosion Expander gives his bombs a power boost, and Bomb Kick and Power Glove let him kick and throw bombs at his own leisure. Boomstick: And when he picks up Super Bombs, you know he means business. I'm talkin' T2: Judgement Day business. Power-Ups: Accelerator Armor Explosion Expander Bombkick Power Glove Super Bomb The group could only gulp at the wide variety of ways the white bomber could lay waste to their planet. Wiz: Bomberman can also hatch and tame wild Rooeys, kangaroo-like creatures which give White Bomber a distinct advantage in battle. “Their so cute!” cooed Fluttershy, completely falling for the cute creatures and wishing she could make friends with them. Boomstick: Each Rooey has a different ability, though generally they are very fast, have incredibly good jumping skills, can step over bombs, and sacrifice themselves for Bomberman if need be. Kind of like Yoshi. “Nooo!” Cried Fluttershy. Rooeys: Easily Tamed Super Speed High Jumps Can step over bombs Sometimes called 'Looeys' or 'Louies' Wiz: Which brings up Bomberman's weakness: his own weapons. If White Bomber's careless, he can easily get caught in his own explosion or trap himself between a wall and his dropped bombs. “It’s for those reasons we never let our royal guard handle any explosives,” explained Celestia. “We don’t want a repeat from 1500 years ago,” Luna deadpanned. Boomstick: Yeah, Bomberman's pretty good at blowing shit up, but he's not so hot when it comes to defusing his own explosives, but he's survived through a crap-ton of games, leaving behind many smoldering piles of rubble that used to be planets, towns, and families Bomberman: I did it! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ The group wasn’t sure what to think of The white Bomber, but they could agree that he was dangerous. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Dig Dug (*Cues: Dig Dug Game Room Theme - Namco Museum Vol.3*) Wiz: Dig Dug is an expert excavator and executioner. He consistently traverses the underground to slay dragons. His real name is Taizo Hori, which literally means "I want to dig". He is also the father of the more recent phenomenon, Mr. Driller. “This guy actively hunts dragons!?” gasped out Spike. Background: Real Name: Taizo Hori Honorary Chairman of the Driller Council Father of Mr. Driller Ex-Husband of 'Kissy' from Baraduke A.K.A. Alien Sector Boomstick: Dig Dug has two loves in life: diggin' and killin'. His main weapon is one of the most cruel and deadly weapons I've ever seen. It's pretty much a cross between a bike pump and a harpoon. “Oh sweet celestia…” Twilight was quick to figure out what that weapon did. Wiz: An odd weapon, which I would normally question the efficiency of... “As would I,” Rarity agreed. Not understanding what was so deadly about it. Boomstick: But when he stabs you with it... you're gonna wish you die any other way than what Mr. Dig Dug has planned for you. Now everyone was starting to get an uneasy feeling about the Pump weapon. Wiz: The average human body can only take around 15 pounds per square inch of air pressure before death is assured. Every time Dig Dug pumps, over 10 PSI is injected into his victim, quickly immobilizing them. Two or three pumps later, Dig Dug's target combusts. “Mother of me,” Celestia whispered out. Boomstick: That is one horrible way to die. Imagine after being impaled, you're then slowly filled with air until you explode. Oh man, this guy is sick. Pump: 15' Harpoon-like hose Forcefully inflates foes Stuns enemies for a short time Injects 10 psi per pump Pumped until the victim explodes “WHAT SICKO USES SOMETHING LIKE THAT!?” screamed Rainbow dash, as she held onto a frightened Fluttershy. Wiz: Dig Dug also has a jackhammer, which he uses to burrow through the earth at an unimaginable speed. He has total control over his terrain and can maneuver through the ground just as easily as walking through an empty field, climbing and crawling without slowing down. “This monster can dig far greater than any diamond dog,” muttered Rarity. Jackhammer: Burrows in 4 directions Instant start up Fast & Efficient Can tear apart islands (that terrified the group beyond words.) Boomstick: That jackhammer can even force entire islands to split apart, but the strangest thing is the sound it makes. You'd think a jackhammer would sound like this... (*jackhammer sound*) Everyone winced from the loud noise of the Jackhammer. Boomstick: But Dig Dug's sounds like this. (*Dig Dug walking sound*) That actually got some raised brows from the group. Wiz: Actually, Boomstick, that sound seems to occur each time he takes a step, not just when he's drilling. Boomstick: So... what? It's his feet? Man, that would get really annoying. No wonder this guy is a psycho. “Still not a good reason to kill his enemies like that.” growled out Twilight. Wiz: Dig Dug possesses great physical endurance, climbing and digging tirelessly for unprecedented amounts of time, and yet he is easily defeated when tackled by a tomato with eyes. Boomstick/everyone: What? Wiz: Yes, Dig Dug battles both ferocious dragons and living tomatos. “That’s… so stupid,” deadpanned Luna. Boomsticks: Who in the hell thought walking tomatoes with goggles were on-par with fire-breathing ghost dragons? “YA!” yelled an enraged Spike. Angry at the fact that his people where compared to a Fruit with eyes The group sees Dig Dug sneak up on a unsuspecting dragon and then attaches his weapon onto the poor creature. “Oh god no…” muttered Spike (*Pumps dragon three times*) “Nononono!” the young drake cried out. (*Dragon explodes*) “NOOOOO!” screamed Spike, as Twilight was Quick to embrace the poor child, (*Dig Dug level complete jingle*) Wiz: Alright the combatants are set, let's end this debate once and for all. Boomstick: But first, I spilled some coffee on my space dinosaur t-shirt and I need to get another but wheeere? Wiz: Why aa Bustedtees of course. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Everyone was stunned at the brutal way dig dug would beat his enemies and worried for the white bomber. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Boomstick: But right now, It's time for a Death Battle! Death Battle (*Cues: Stage Theme - Bomberman NES*) Bomberman is riding a Rooey across Dig Dug's field when they suddenly cross Dig Dug. FIGHT! (*Cues: Battle - Bomberman 64*) Dig Dug fires his harpoon, which the Rooey gets out of the way of, then it dashes into Dig Dug six times. After the last hit, Dig Dug sees a bomb dropped by Bomberman and quickly burrows into the ground. The explosion destroys a block and reveals an Explosion Expander, which Bomberman goes for. Dig Dug sneaks up underneath Bomberman, stabbing his harpoon into the Rooey. After four pumps, the Rooey explodes, leaving Bomberman on the ground. He then quickly gets up, lifts up a bomb, charges it twice, then drops it into the hole. Dig Dug sees it and runs away once again. The explosion destroys more blocks, revealing four power-ups: Accelerator, Explosion Expander, Bomb-Up, and Bomb Kick. Bomberman walks over and picks all four of them up before following Dig Dug's trail and kicking a bomb in his direction. (*Cues: Masker - Bomberman 64*) Dig Dug turns around and uses his harpoon to deflect it. Bomberman then kicks it, with the cycle continuing until Bomberman throws another bomb. Both flee as the bombs' both create huge plus-shaped explosions, destroying many blocks, underneath them the Super Bomb, which Bomberman grabs. Dig Dug continues fleeing, digging his way upward towards the surface as Bomberman holds the Super Bomb in his hand, charging it to four times its size, before throwing it. The explosion from it is so great that Dig Dug, who nearly made it, is in the air with no blocks around him, causing him to fall down in front of Bomberman, who has another Super Bomb for him. (*Cues: Boss Intro #2 - Bomberman 64*) As Bomberman charges it twice, Dig Dug quickly fires his harpoon at Bomberman, causing him to drop the Super Bomb, then pumps him twice before digging underneath to escape the inevitable explosion. Bomberman slowly recovers, then turns to see his Super Bomb about to go off. His “Oh he done Bucked up!” cried applejack. eyes turn large and cartoonish as he lets out a scream before the Super Bomb explodes, leaving a huge hole in the ground. Dig Dug then looks over at the newly-made hole, seeing that his opponent was obliterated by his own weapon. K.O.! Results (*Cues: Dig Dug REMIX - Trailer Theme*) Boomstick: Yeah, explosions! “YA!!” cheered Rainbow Dash. Wiz: Dig Dug is a difficult opponent for anyone to beat, not for brute strength but maneuverability. Dig Dug had complete control over the terrain right off the bat, while Bomberman was forced to rely on his power ups for success. “The fact that he had to resort to his top weaponry was a huge sign that he was out class from the start,” lectured Twilight. Boomstick: Taking the fight into the ground gave Dig Dug a huge advantage. “And you never fight an enemy on their terms,” added Luna, remembering Commander Hurricane’s lessons back before the whole Nightmare Moon incident. Wiz: Even after if it looked like Bomberman took the lead, Dig Dug proved he could control his opponent just as much as he can control his environment. Boomstick: Bomberman sure went out with a bang. Everyone groaned at that lame pun. Wiz: The winner is Dig Dug. END! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Boomstick: Next time on Death Battle. The group see a bipedal animal like figure walking out of the smoke. He's some kind of hedgehog wearing red and white shoes, white gloves and two rings, each wrapped around his wrist. His fur is grayish gold with red stripes and he glowed with some kind of aura like energy that was as bright as the sun. He speaks in a intimidating, chilling voice. ????: I am Shadow, the ultimate life form. Then they see a man with an arrogant look on his face. He's wearing some kind of strange outfit that could be armor and his spiky hair was glowing gold as well as his eyebrows that could put gold to shame in brilliance. He's also surrounded by an aura like energy. He also speaks in an arrogant voice but deadly voice. ?????: And I, am the Prince of all Saiyans! Vegeta vs Shadow. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ “Well that was yet another interesting episode,” commented Twilight “Yeah it was pretty cool. The explosions, the chase and everything was just right,” Rainbow said, lazily hovering in the air. “And it seems the box gave us a few plush toys of the characters,” Rarity said, holding a plushie of Bomberman in her magic. As everyone had their own plushie, Twilight noticed that there were two extra plushies inside the box. Confused by the extras the box gave, Twilight looked around to see if any of her friends didn’t get one. A quick head count showed her that someone was missing. “Where’s Pinkie?” Twilight asked her friends. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ With Pinkie Pie ~~~~~~~~~~~~~ We find Pinkie Pie outside Twilight’s crystal castle talking to …...Bomberman? What the fuck? “So you’re telling me your organization wants me to join them?” Pinkie Pie asked the white bomer. Bomberman nods happily. “Wowsers, I can be the first party pony in space,” Pinkie said, dancing happily. “Sign me up.” Bomberman made a happy sounding noise which mostly likely meant his approval. He pulled out a bomb shaped badge from… somewhere and gave it to Pinkie. He gave the party pony a happy little wave as he was surrounded by light and disappeared from sight. Most likely returning to his planet or to an arena to dispense justice to evildoers and planets. “Bye-Bye, Bomb-bomb,” Pinkie said, waving goodbye to her new destructive friend. She looked at her newly acquired badged, smiling at the thought of new adventures she’ll have in the near future. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ CHAPTER END! NEXT TIME VEGETA VS SHADOW! Vegeta VS Shadow.After the girls were able to locate there wayward pink friend, they hurried back to the ballroom to finish off the last episode of the day. “See that's a much better intro,” complemented Pinkie Pie. Whatever… I don’t live for your approval. “Wow, you’re grumpy today. Anyways next episode,” Pinkie said as the episode started. Interlude (*Cues: Invader - Jim Johnston*) Wiz: Antiheroes. Walking a mysterious gray line between good and evil. Boomstick: They do what they want, however they want, when they want. Wiz: Vegeta, Prince of the Saiyans and rival to Goku… “A prince joins the fight?” Luna said, shocked that another member of royalty would fight. Boomstick: And Shadow, the Ultimate Life Form and rival to Sonic “How is a hedgehog a ultimate lifeform?” questioned Rainbow dash Wiz: I'm Wizard and he's Boomstick and it's our job to analyze their weapons, armor, and skills to find out who would win a Death Battle. Vegeta (*Cues: Hell's Bells - Dragon Ball Z*) Wiz: Born a prince to warrior-like Saiyan race, Vegeta's people were slaughtered by an evil tyrant named Freeza, who molded Vegeta into a deadly, ruthless killer. Over time, however, Freeza's iron grip over him led Vegeta to rebel, ushering Freeza's final defeat with the help of fellow Saiyan Goku. After struggling with adapting to life on Earth, Vegeta eventually became one of the planet's strongest defenders. “His whole race was destroyed?” Twilight yelled, scared of the alien who could annihilate a planet. “And was used by that despicable being,” Celestia angrily said, thinking of the Nightmare use her little sister. Boomstick: He even got hitched to Bulma, breaking poor Master Roshi's heart. Vegeta can move and fly at hypersonic speeds, he can survive underwater and in far outer atmospheres for long periods of time. He even has an endurance to survive a nuclear freakin' blast. “At least he’s married now,” Rarity said, slightly jealous the a prince found his princess. Background: Height: 5'5" Weight: 123 lbs. Saiyan Prince Elite Warrior Class Trained in Martial Arts Current Leader of the Z-Fighters (*Cues: Vegeta Powers Up - Dragon Ball Z*) Wiz: Vegeta can use a natural inner energy called ki to create devastating attacks. Boomstick: His trademark attack is a purple laser called the Galick Gun. “Oooh, did he say garlick gu-” asked Pinkie, before getting shushed by Twilight for interrupting. Wiz: His Big Bang attack unleashes a huge explosion of energy covering up vast distance, and can be narrowed to a beam for concentrated accuracy. “Such destructive power,” muttered Celestia with a hint of fear. Boomstick: He can launch a volley of energy bullets, pounding his foe with dozens of blasts, but his most devastating move is his Final Flash attack, a huge golden beam that can destroy whole planets. Wiz: Vegeta's ki is quite versatile and not limited to these four attacks. He is never without a weapon. Ki Attacks: Galick Gun Bang Beam Big Bang Attack Final Shine Energy Blast Volley Final Flash “Why would he need a weapon when he can use awesome laser beams,” Rainbow said, liking all his attacks. Boomstick: But wait! There's more! “There is!?” asked a flabbergasted Spike. Wiz: That's right! Vegeta can reach to the legendary status of Super Saiyan, a near indestructible form of which increases his power output by 500%. “Woah,” everyone said, amazed by his transformation. “He can change his hair color? And he doesn’t need some dye? That’s unfair,” Rarity said, slightly jealous Vegeta can change his image. Boomstick: And he can take this form to the next level for yet another 500% increase. That's a lot of power in math. Super Saiyan: Can reach levels 1 & 2 500% increase per form Can be activated any time Sustained through energy Nearly indestructible Level 2 drains more energy than Level 1 “Bow before Math!” yelled Twilight in her own version of the canterlot voice. Wiz: The Super Saiyan form is sustained through Vegeta's remaining energy. Also, despite reaching the level of Super Saiyan Four, he was only able to do so with Bulma's Blutz Wave Machine, and cannot do so naturally. Boomstick: And in Death Battle, we don't allow help from spouses. “That seems a little unfair,” Fluttershy said, believing that love can do many incredible things. “But it’s a part of the rules,” Applejack said, as her shy friend nodded to show she understood the rules. Wiz: Vegeta is cocky, arrogant, and proud. He seeks to be the best and is willing to fight the best to do so, even allowing his opponents reach power levels much greater than his own. Boomstick: Well, this has led to him dying twice so far, he's still around somehow kicking ass and being a dick. “Sounds like Rainbow Dash if we don’t keep her ego in check,” snarked Applejack. Getting a pout from said blue pegasus. Vegeta: I am a Super Saiyan! (screen flashes as Vegeta prepares attack) And you can burn in Hell! Shadow (*Cues: Throw It All Away (Instrumental) - Sonic Adventure 2*) Wiz: Built by Prof. Gerald Robotnik with alien DNA, Shadow the Hedgehog was created to be the Ultimate Life Form. Despite being a powerful, living weapon, Shadow's initial purpose was to provide genes capable of curing the deathly ill, specifically, Gerald's granddaughter, Maria. But before Shadow could be shared with the world, tragedy struck. “Why,” everyone cried as a few tears ran down their faces. Even Spike and the princesses were crying a bit as they lowered their heads in sadness. “What kind of monsters would harm a child?” Rarity asked, blowing her nose on a tissue. “The worst kind,” Celestia coldly said, secretly hating any form of child abuse or murder. Boomstick: Then Shadow went crazy and tried to destroy the Earth for revenge, but he ended up saving the day instead. Though people are still getting sick on Earth, so uhh... guess he kinda forgot about that whole living cure thing, huh? Background Height: 3'3" Weight: 77 lbs. Bio-Engineered Ultimate Life Form Nearly Indestructible Hypersonic Speed Martial Arts Skills “Guess the whole revenge thing made him forget his original purpose,” Spike said, weakly laughing at that. Wiz: Shadow can move at hypersonic speeds and survive underwater and in space. “Guess Dashie might have just lost her title,” Pinkie said giggling. “Seems like it, sugarcube,” Applejack said, laughing at her speedy friend. “I could so beat this ‘ultimate lifeform’ hooves down,” Rainbow said, glaring at the black hedgehog on the screen. Boomstick: He's even tough enough to survive a fall to the Earth from the moon, and that's one long ass fall. “How can a little hedgehog survive a fall like that,” Fluttershy wondered. Wiz: Well, it wasn't exactly the moon, but Shadow survived a fall of about 200,000 miles. By the time he hit the ground, he was falling at a rate of over 6,000,000 feet per second. Boomstick: I feel sorry for whatever was around when he landed, some guy just walking along and ... (indistinctly) OH MY GOD! “BOOOM, ow my leg!” screamed Pinkie Pie, before going into a giggling fit. (*Cues: All Hail Shadow [Orchestrated by YannickJason]*) Wiz: Right. Shadow possesses a natural link to the chaos force, a never ending pool of unbelievable energy. “Wow, that means he has more power than all of the unicorns combined,” Twilight said in awe. Boomstick: He can fire several different energy based projectiles like Chaos Spears and Beams. But his most powerful attack is Chaos Blast, a huge explosion which annihiates everything around him in seconds. Chaos Force Chaos Control Chaos Spear Chaos Blast Other Energy-Based Attacks Can be used to defend, heal, fly & warp Wiz: He can also manipulate time and space with Chaos Control, though depending on the situation using this technique to its fullest takes time and is impractical in combat. Also, Shadow wears two Inhibitor Rings, which are stricting his access to the chaos force to maintain control, should he remove them, his power increases immensely, but is somewhat uncontrollable and quickly tires him out. Inhibitor Rings Restricts Chaos Power Maintains Precision Control When removed, his powers increase exponentially When removed, his stamina drops quickly “Holy list of super powers Batman!” gasped out Pinkie Pie. “Who’s Batman?” asked a confused Twilight. “Meh you’ll find out in a few episodes,” waved off Pinkie, confusing her friends further. Boomstick: His chaos power also increases depending on the number of Chaos Emeralds he has, and when he gets seven of them, ha, he goes super. “Soooo… a rip off of super saiyan?” questioned Rainbow dash. Wiz: Super Shadow is the pinnacle of his powers, receiving a 1,000% power increase. “But it seems to jump to the same power level of super saiyan,” added in Applejack. Boomstick: He can fly, move near the speed of light, and is totally invincible. Super Form 1000% Power Increase Automatic Flight Unlimited Endurance Invincible Duration based on a time limit “... ok I give up,” said Rainbow Dash as she hung her head in defeat. Wiz: Despite this, Shadow's super form can only last a few minutes. Boomstick: But, considering his super speed, a short time to him is a long time to his opponents. Shadow: That's not all, I'm full of surprises. Wiz: Alright the combatants are set, let's end this debate once and for all… oh wait, let me get a new book first. Boomstick: An audio book? Wiz: From audible.com Boomstick: for people who are too lazy to read or are blind! Thought as why I got em. (ads play.) Death Battle (*Cues: Androids Steal Truck - Dragon Ball Z*) Shadow is skating from his hover shoes in a green field. He then stops in front of Vegeta, whose back is turned. Shadow: There you are! I knew I sensed an extraordinary power around here. Vegeta: Well that certainly sounds like me. (He turns to Shadow) Ummm...who and what are you? “He’s a hedgehog silly!” giggeld Pinkie Pie Shadow: I am Shadow the Hedgehog. (Shadow stands at fighting pose) The Ultimate Life Form! Vegeta: Ultimate Life Form? A weird looking rat, is an Ultimate Llfe Form? HAHAHAHA! That's a laugh. Word of advice, freak: you're little on the short side if you're trying to be threatening. Shadow: Funny. I was going to say the same thing about you. “Oh snap,” Rainbow said, high amused by the pre-battle banter. Vegeta: You've just sealed your fate, fool. “Seems the prince can’t take a joke,” snarked Applejack. FIGHT! (*Cues: Hyperbolic Time Chamber - Dragon Ball Z*) Shadow launches a kick at Vegeta, but the latter catches the former's feet, kicks him off. Vegeta then charges a blast of purple Ki energy in his hands before blasting it at Shadow. Vegeta: GALICK GUN, FIRE!! After being hit by a strong attack, Shadow's still standing from the blast, exhaustingly. Vegeta: Pathetic. Before you die, let me show you a True Ultimate Life Form! (*Cues: Super Saiyan Vegeta - Dragon Ball Z*) “This is some sick beats!” Rainbow dash Commented Vegeta powers up immensely, aura surrounding him, and his dark, gravity defying hair now glowing blonde, becoming the legendary status of Super Saiyan. Vegeta: Hehe! Tell me hedgehog, does a lab rat like you experience fear? “So coool!” cheered the blue mare. (*Cues: Mephiles' Whisper - Sonic the Hedgehog (2006)*) Shadow: You have... no idea... WHO YOU'RE DEALING WITH! (*he leaps up in mid-air and surrounds himself with all seven Chaos Emeralds*) Vegeta: What's this? “Is that one of the chaos emeralds?” Twilight asked, trying to get a better look at it. After he taps into the power of the seven Emeralds, he turns from a black to a yellow lime coloured hedgehog with a bright glow and aura with invincible godlike powers, becoming Super Shadow. Shadow: Behold the true power I possess! Vegeta: Wow... what a ripoff--- (*Super Shadow tackles Vegeta*) GAH!!! (*Cues: BOSS: HEAVY DOG - Shadow the Hedgehog*) Vegeta gets attacked by Shadow, blocking from a melee receiving from the arrogant, bioengineered hedgehog. Afterwards, Shadow side kicks Vegeta, leaving projectiles of Chaos energy after hitting Vegeta seven times, and from hitting by the energy left by Shadow, Vegeta then land crashes at the ground. Shadow then launches a barrage of his Chaos Spear at Vegeta, but Vegeta jumps up and knees Shadow to the abdomen, kicked him, and then launches a volley of Energy Bullets. But when the smoke clears, Shadow is gone. Vegeta: Wha-Where did he go? Shadow: Right behind you. Vegeta charges a blast of energy at concentrated accuracy, but before he can blast it at Shadow, the latter snaps his finger, teleports the former underwater. Vegeta: (voiceover) ... The hell? How did I get here? (*annoyed groan*) “He did that with the snap of his fingers,” Spike said, shocked at how fast Shadow could teleport someone. Shadow: Hmph. That was easier than I thought, I guess I'm better than... SHIT! “Huh? Him cursing seems… forced,” commented Pinkie Pie. (*Cues: Androids Steal Truck - Dragon Ball Z again*) Vegeta: Graaah!!! Vegeta suddenly jumps out of the water, his body full of energy Vegeta: Cheap trick! Teleporting me underwater, Coward! Cut the act and give up already! You're nothing compared to me! Shadow snaps his finger again, this time teleports Vegeta to the Earth's moon. “And now he’s on the moon?” Twilight stuttered, impressed at the distance Shadow could use his teleport ability. Vegeta: Goddamnit. Shadow watches from distance. Shadow: Hmph. Vegeta: Playtime's over, runt! (*Cues: Destruction - Dragon Ball Z*) Vegeta punches the surface of the moon, pushing it closer to Earth. “Did he just punch the moon out of orbit!?” Screamed Luna. Shadow: No! Is he insane!? “No, he just really hates to lose.”explained Rainbow Dash. Shadow takes off his inhibitor rings, glows bright red, shouts "CHAOS... CONTROL!", and then teleports the moon back to it's place. Shadow: Yes. I did it! Vegeta: Congrats, furball. Shadow: It's time to end this! Shadow glows bright red, shouts "CHAOS... BLAST!", then clenches his entire body before throwing out his arms like wings. But it doesn't affect Vegeta, because Shadow's Super form wears off. “That’s not good,” Rarity said, knowing Shadow had a limit to his super form. Shadow: Uh-oh. Vegeta: Sayonara. Vegeta fires the Final Flash at Shadow, vaporizing the latter into the same shade of his quills, smoke. K.O.! Results (*Cues: Heroic Trunks - Dragon Ball Z*) Boomstick: Oh, somebody call PETA, we're down a hedgehog! “What’s PETA?” questioned Rarity. “Sounds pretentious,” Fluttershy surprisingly Snarked. Wiz: With Super Shadow's godly power and invulnerability, the question wasn't if Vegeta could kill Shadow, it was if Vegeta could survive Super Shadow. “He did die two times if you remember correct,” Rarity said, realizing what the hosts were suggesting. Boomstick: But Vegeta's proven time after time he can take one hell of a beating and lasted long enough for Shadow to turn back to normal, giving Vegeta the opening he needed. Wiz: His loud mouth certainly helped him in his past, too. “Agreed,” the group said, Boomstick: Looks like Shadow's time was up. Wiz: The winner is Vegeta. END! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Boomstick: Next time on Death Battle. They see a red cap with an M on it and Blue eyes. They then see a familiar chubby man they've heard about him many times through previous fighters backstories, and now he's the next combatant. They then see a blue hedgehog with green eyes, red and white shoes, a cocky smirk that reminded some of them of a certain blue mare, and they see him running across the fields at high speeds. It was the same hedgehog that was fighting alongside Shadow. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ “Hey I just noticed something,” Rainbow said, getting everyone’s attention. “What’s that Dash?” asked Applejack “I haven’t seen Starlight in a while,” Rainbow said, causing her friend’s eyes to go wide. “Well she’s been at the Crystal Empire visiting Sunburst,” explained Twilight before she adopted a confused look, “though she was supposed to be back by now.” “Wasn’t she suppose to to be there for a week?” Spiked asked, scratching his head in confusion. “She should have been back yesterday at the latest,” Twilight said, remembering the time of her arrival. “I wonder where in the world is Starlight Glimmer.” wondered Pinkie Pie while wearing a red oversized fedora. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~With Starlight Glimmer.~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ We cut to a scene in the middle of a tundra where a train has fallen off it’s tracks. The passenger carriages were all either crushed, ripped apart or on fire as a small pile of debris started to move. Suddenly a pink furred, purple maned with an aqua streak pushed the debris off of her. “Thank harmony, I was conveniently the only one on the train,” Starlight said, gasping for breathe. “Ok, now I need to get to the nearest town.” ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Back with the group ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ “Meh she’ll be fine. She probably wanted to stay an extra day or two. She’ll be back before we know it,” shrugged Twilight. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ CHAPTER END. NEXT TIME MARIO VS SONIC. Mario VS SonicWe see our group and two sisters gathered in front of the TV preparing to finish the last episode for the day. “Ok everyone let’s watch the final episode for today,” declared Twilight getting a few nods of agreement. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Interlude (*Cues: Invader - Jim Johnston*) Wiz: Their rivalry is legendary and their fame unmatched. After battling for over two decades, this epic duel will finally meet a decisive end. “Two decades!?” everyone marveled. “This must be some rivalry,” Celestia said, shocked that it would take them twenty years to settle a fight. Boomstick: I've been waiting for this forever! “Guess Boomstick wanted to do this one?” Applejack said, wondering what they’re in for. “Everypony has something they want to see,” Rainbow lazily said. “Personally I would love to see a battle royale that doesn’t involve families killing each other,” she said, as everyone but the princesses nodded sadly. Wiz: Mario, the whimsical Italian plumber... “A plumber? How could a plumber be able to put up a fight?” Rarity asked, a little underwhelmed “Never underestimate a plumber,” warned Pinkie Pie. while she was wearing a red hawaiian shirt. Boomstick: ...and Sonic, the hyperactive hedgehog. “So this is Shadow’s rival?” spike asked, already seeing a major difference in the two hedgehogs. “Heh he doesn't look tough at all,” Rainbow dash added in. Wiz: I'm Wizard and he's Boomstick, and it's our job to analyze their weapons, armor and skills to find out who would win a Death Battle. Mario (*Cues: Buoy Base Galaxy - Super Mario Galaxy*) Wiz: Mario is one of the star children and possesses many special abilities with the intent of protecting his home, the Mushroom Kingdom. Even as a baby, he was obviously destined for greatness. Boomstick: When you've got an army of dinosaurs serving you before you can even speak, you know you're gonna do great things. “Aw, look at him with the Yoshis,” Fluttershy said, cooing at both baby Mario and the Yoshis. Wiz: He is well known for his incredible athleticism and unmatched jumping ability. “But he seems so… plump,” Rarity commented. Making sure to word it nicely as to not come off as rude. Boomstick: Who says white guys can't jump? “Huh? Sounds like something i used to hear earth pony guards say about unicorns back in the castle,” noted Twilight. “Sigh… guess i have to have a talk with the guards about racial profiling,” facehooved Celestia. Wiz: Plus, he's a powerhouse, with the strength to lift heavy objects and crush enormous castles. He also uses his bare fists to smash solid brick. Background Height: 5'1" Can Jump Over 20 Feet ( that surprised the group, that such a plump person could jump that high.) High Stamina Superhuman Strength Superhuman Durability Skilled Combatant “Wooowy! The only one I know who can smash brick is Big Mac and Pinkie’s sister!” marveled Applejack. “Ooh! I should get Maud to join us sometime!” cheered Pinkie pie. Boomstick: With his jumping skills and weight, he can pound and crush his foes into oblivion, and if he needs some extra firepower, well, he's got his entire arsenal of power-ups! Wiz: His first power-up is the Fire flower. With it, Mario obtains pyrokinetic abilities. “A flower?” Luna asked, “How would a flower help him?” “We’ll find out in a moment, Luna,” Celestia said, taking a bite out of a piece of cake. Boomstick: Really? I always thought the flower was just really spicy. “That's a Spicy Meat-a-BALL!” said Pinkie Pie, while wearing a thick fake mustache. (*Cues: Bowser's Lava Lair - Super Mario Galaxy 2*) Fire Flower Grants Pyrokinesis Can Create & Manipulate Fire Bouncing Fireballs Ends After Absorbing 1 Deadly Blow Wiz: He can create and manipulate fire to produce a variety of devastating attacks. “Interesting,” Twilight muttered, wondering if this flower really exists. “Interesting? I say awesome, I wish I could do something like that,” Spike said excitedly. Being a dragon, Spike liked to see all kinds of different fire attacks. “And i must say, I’m quite interested in how it changes his outfits colors,” added in rarity. Fascinated with how the plumber’s outfit changed colors as soon as he touched the flower. Boomstick: He's also got this frog suit thingy. While wearing it, Mario can jump even higher, swim even faster, and breathe underwater. The only problem is no one's really gonna take him seriously wearing that thing. Ha ha! Ah, look at him! Frog Suit Increases Jump Height Increases Swimming Speed Can Breathe Underwater Resists Water Currents for Better Control Looks Absolutely Ridiculous! Everyone laughed at how silly the Italian plumber looked in the suit. “I wish I could see the look on his enemies face when they see him,” Rainbow said, causing everyone to laugh at the mental images they got. Wiz: Several different power-ups have granted Mario flight before, but none as well as the Cape Feather. With it, Mario can fly for an unprecedented amount of time. “Whoa! This guy can fly now!?” asked a shocked Rainbow dash. “Flying seems to be the norm lately with a lot of this battles,” chimed in Applejack. Cape Feather Wears a Yellow Cape Can Fly for Unprecedented Amounts of Time Can Deflect Projectiles Razor-Sharp Edge Boomstick: The Metal Cap turns Mario's entire body into indestructible living steel. But while Metal Mario's extremely heavy, his strength and speed are boosted, giving him ten times more power and just as much agility as before. “Something that coats you in steel but makes you faster as well?” asked a confused Twilight, who was about to go on a long lecture about how that’s impossible but a comforting hoof from her mentor calmed her down. “Remember my former student, there are types of magic out there that i don’t even know about,” said the princess of the sun to her former student, who nodded in understanding. Metal Cap Becomes Living Metal Nearly Indestructible Incredibly Heavy Power Increase Speed and Maneuverability Remain Unchanged Wiz: The Starman envelops Mario into a blinding aura of compressed energy, granting increased speed and complete invulnerability for a short time. Touching a normal enemy in this state will instantly kill the foe. And while it's not technically a power-up, Mario has a hammer that can crush almost ANYTHING. Starman Invulnerable Increases Speed Instantly Kills Foes Short Time Limit “That star power almost looks like our Rainbow power,” Fluttershy said, getting a few nods in agreement when the rest of the group saw the similarities. Though i’d like to see this Star power can take out a centaur who has all the magic of Equestria,” challenged Rainbow dash. Not willing to admit something could beat their Ace in the hole. Boomstick: It seems like Mario's always popping 'shrooms to get more power. And with the Mega Mushroom, he gets GINORMOUS, mowing down people, plants, environment, hell, everything! “I could throw a GIANT monster party with those!!” yelled the Pink party pony in excitement. “Let’s never let her get her hooves on those mushrooms,” Spike said to the rest of the group getting everyone to agree it would be a bad idea. Mega Mushroom Mario Grows Giant Invulnerable Can Smash Through Almost Any Obstacle Lasts for a Short Time Wiz: Mario has battled a larger variety of enemies than any other video game hero. Whether a foe is large or small, scary or goofy, dumb or deadly, nothing has ever proved too much for him. “Oh my! He really is a great hero to defend his kingdom,” praised Celestia. With her younger sister agreeing with her. “Quit true dear sister, and in a way he reminds me of our own heroes.” Luna agreed while looking at the young group of ponies and one dragon with a smile, getting one from her older sister as well. Boomstick: Except for keepin' track of his woman. She's always gettin' kidnapped and he's always showing up at the wrong castle. Somebody needs to throw a GPS tracking bracelet on that bitch! The girls decided to not comment on the that little line. Wiz: He is fairly impulsive and not much of a strategist, preferring to quickly fight his way through problems before thinking things through. While twilight would usually talk down about those kind of strategies, she has learned threw her time living with her friends had taught her that different strategies worked for different people and her way wasn’t always the right way. Boomstick: But that doesn't matter, Italy's greatest hero can power through anything! That was something the group could agree on after hearing about Mario's feats in this episode. Mario: "It's-a me, Mario!" “Hi Mario!!” everyone welcomed, before busting out into laughter. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ After hearing about his skills and history, the group agreed that mario was indeed a great hero and they couldn't wait to see who he was battling. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Sonic (*Cues: Sonic 3 & Knuckles - Robotnik Theme (Orchestral)*) Wiz: Sonic the Hedgehog is the fastest thing alive, and a freedom fighter battling to save the world from the tyrannical Dr. Ivo Eggman Robotnik. “The fastest thing alive?” questioned Rainbow Dash, narrowing her eyes at the blue hedgehog. “Well he is Shadow's rival,” Spike reminded the blue mare. Confused on why she was getting so hostile with the Blue blur, when she freely admitted that Shadow was faster than her. “Ya but Shadow is a really cool dude, unlike this blue loser!” pouted the Blue mare. “Is it just me or is Rainbow Dash acting weird?” Applejack whispered to Rarity “Beats me,” answered Rarity, just as confused. Boomstick: He's not so bad for a tree-hugging hippie. “What's wrong with tree hugging?” asked Fluttershy innocently. Wiz: Sonic's most notable ability is his speed. He can easily break the sound barrier in mere seconds. While his top speed is unknown, he has clocked in an average of 765 mph. Background Height: 3'3" Weight: 77 lbs. Age: 16 Freedom Fighter Top Speed: Unknown Average of 765 mph Figure 8 Technique “Big deal! You girls have seen me do that before,” ranted the Blue mare. The group agreeing with her after seeing it for themselves multiple times. “But they said that’s not his fastest speed though,” twilight said only to reserve a glare from the rainbow mare before she went back to glaring at the screen. Not only confusing the lavender princess but the rest of her friends as well. Though the two princesses couldn't help but smirk at the young blue mare with knowing looks, and amusement dancing in their eyes. Boomstick: Holy crap! This guy must blow through shoes. “What are this “shoes” boomstick speaks of?” asked Luna, while the others wondered as well. Wiz: He can further increase his speed with his trademark figure 8 technique. “Wow his legs are moving so fast it looks like an infinity symbol!” Marveld Twilight. “Pfft big deal.”snarked Rainbow Dash. Boomstick: But he's not just fast on his feet. He can curl up into a spiky ball and rip through his opponents with the spin attack. “Huh? But hedgehogs can’t do that…” muttered Fluttershy. “Well he’s not an ordinary Hedgehog,” commented Spike. Wiz: His homing attack rockets toward an opponent and can hit multiple times. “Doesn't beat flying though,” bragged Rainbow Dash, getting a few eye rolls for her constant remarks against the blue runner. Boomstick: And with his spin dash, he can reach top speeds almost instantly. How does this guy not vomit? “Probably from a lot of pratice,” Luna theorized. Attacks & Techniques Spin Attack Spin Dash Homing Attack Light-Speed-Dash Martial Arts (that caught Dash’s attention.” Can Burrow Underground (*Cues: Sonic 3 - Final Boss Theme (Orchestral)*) Wiz: During his adventures, he has used a variety of different shields to improve his abilities. Each shield can deflect minor projectiles and have environmental advantages, though they will disintegrate after blocking a deadly blow. “Well at least they do their job,” Celestia commented. “Maybe they would still be worth learning on how to make?” Questioned Luna. getting a nod from her sister. Boomstick: The Fire Shield can absorb, well, fire and heat, though it can't survive underwater. No shit! But with it, Sonic can use a fiery dash attack. Fire Shield Impervious to Fire & Heat Fiery Makeup Disintegrates in Water Mid-Air Dash Attack “That’s pretty cool.” Applejack said. “Don’t you mean “Hot”?” giggled Pinkie Pie, only to get groans from her friends in return. Wiz: The Lightning Shield can't survive in aquatic environments either, but it gives Sonic a mid-air jump for further aerial control. “Interesting.” Twilight said but Rainbow Dash rolled her eye’s Lightning Shield Impervious to Electricity Electric Makeup Disintegrates in Water Magnetic Field Mid-Air Jump Boomstick: And with the Bubble Shield, he can breathe underwater and control his jumps with a powerful bounce. Why do we keep mentioning water, you may ask? 'Cause he can't freakin' swim! Bubble Shield Can Breathe Underwater Water and Air Makeup Bounce Attack Bouncing Can Increase Jump Height “Ha! What kind of loser can’t swim!” Rainbow was quick to mock, maybe a little TOO quickly some of her friends thought. “Man dash, why do you gotta hate the guy so much? It’s almost like you li-!!” Applejack rant died in her throat as a look of realisation makes it’s way on her face, before it’s quickly replace with a look of amusement. “What’s with that look A.J?” asked the blue mare. Wondering why her southern friend was giving her a smug look. “Y-you, snrk! Y-you l-l-l-l- HAHAHAHAHA!!” laughed the apple mare as tears of mirth ran down her cheeks as her laughter went to hysterical levels. “My word Applejack, what's the matter with you?” question Rarity while the others wondered what was up with the cowpony. “S-she LIKES him!” laughed the farm mare as she fell into another fit of laughter. The rest of the mane six and spike stared wide eyed before turning their attention towards Rainbow dash to see her glaring at Applejack while also sporting a huge blush across her face, proving the farm mares claim. “Not. A. Word!” growled out the blue mare but it was for not, as her friends busted out laughing along with their southern friend and even the two sisters giggled at the pout Rainbow Dash was now sporting. Wiz: Sonic's ultimate power-up, however, isn't a shield at all. After absorbing thousands of power rings during his adventures, Sonic has become an embodiment of chaos. That got some concerned looks from everyone in the group as soon as the word “Chaos” was used. (*Cues: Solaris Phase 2 - Sonic the Hedgehog (2006)*) “Wowzers this song is cool!” cheered the pink pony while the others in the group were enjoying the inspiring song. Wiz: Using the power of the seven Chaos Emeralds, Sonic can tap into their incredible power and summon the form of Super Sonic. “Just like Shadow!” declared Spike. “Oh my~ seems like you chose yourself a Golden boy there,” teased Rarity. Wich only to serve to make Rainbow Dash’s blush to grow bigger. Boomstick: Super Sonic can fly, breathe underwater, and is completely invulnerable. “Seems like both Shadow and Sonic share the same abilities when in super form,” commented Celestia. Wiz: Not to mention his speed is increased a thousandfold. Boomstick: But as with most things that are unbelievably powerful, it has a time limit. Without a steady supply of power rings, it can't even last a full minute. Super Form 1000% Power Increase Automatic Flight Unlimited Stamina Invincible Positive Energy Aura Duration Based on a Time Limit “So he’s got to make it count,” said Luna with a coagulating look. “Hopefully it will net him the win…” muttered Rainbow dash. Wiz: And when the form finally subsides, Sonic returns to normal at peak physical form, regardless of his condition prior to the transformation. “Well at least it has an upside when it ends,” Twilight said. Happy to see for once a super mode doesn't leave you drained. Boomstick: While Sonic's always risking his life saving the world from all kinds of dangerous robots and demi gods, he's kind of a dick. “Huh?” everyone said. Wiz: Sonic is cocky, arrogant and addicted to action. He gets cranky and unstable when he's cooped up for too long. “Oh wow! You two were just made for eachother sugarcube,” laughed Applejack along with the others. “Oh man…” groaned out the blue mare hiding her blushing face behind her hooves as fluttershy gave her back a few comforting pats. Boomstick: And if you ignore him, hah, he'll straight up leave you! “Wow sounds like your guy is a little needy,” teased Twilight. Getting a glare in return. Wiz: But despite his rough personality, he'll do whatever it takes to save the day. “He’s a hero through and through,” awed Fluttershy Sonic: "Ooh, I'd like to hang, but I've gotta juice!" runs off Wiz: Alright the combatants are set, let's end this debate once and for all. Boomstick: But first, I gotta get me some rocket boots so I can run like Sonic. “I want some too!” yelled Pinkie Pie. Wiz: What? Where are you gonna get the money for rocket boots? Boomstick: Netflix? ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ As the trailers played out the group was quick to choose sides. For team Mario we have Twilight, Spike, Celestia, Applejack, and Fluttershy. And for team Sonic we have Pinkie Pie, Luna, Rarity, and Rainbow dash. Who was being teased by everyone about supporting her crush. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Boomstick: But right now, it's time for a Death Battle! Death Battle (*Cues: Airship Theme - Super Mario Galaxy*) Sonic is calmly sitting in a field when Mario emerges from a pipe. As Sonic leaps back, Mario jumps down in front of him. Sonic: Alright, Chubby! Let's settle this! Mario: Let's-a go! FIGHT! (*Cues: Sonic 3 - Final Boss Remake Orchestrated / Rock*) Sonic attacks Mario with fast combos and sends him onto the pipe he emerged from. Mario produces a fire flower and becomes Fire Mario. Sonic dodges the fireballs that Mario throws at him but gets hit by Mario's fire slide. Mario: Wah-ha! Mario hits Sonic a few times, then grabs him and spins around in a circle while holding him. Rainbow Dash and the group winced with every hit that the red plumber landed. Mario: Here we go! Mario throws Sonic against the pipe. Mario then uses his cape to throw Sonic upwards, allowing him to knock Sonic to the floor, spin him around in a lariat of fire, and throw him backwards. Mario then releases a massive storm of flame, the Mario Finale, but Sonic is unscathed by his flame shield. Sonic used his flame dash attack to hit Mario six times. Mario counters Sonic's dash with his hammer. “This two are evenly match,” muttered Celestia as she watch the two fighter treading hit blow for blow. “Their not giving their opponent even an inch in this fight,” added in luna. (*Cues: Final Bowser Battle - Super Mario Galaxy 2*) A short montage of the fight begins. Sonic throws a punch and Mario dodges it, but Sonic then hits Mario with his homing attack in the air. Mario then uses his Super Jump Punch at Sonic, and afterward Sonic is standing impatiently next to Tanooki Mario's statue form. “It’s just going back and forth with this two,” muttered Twilight. Getting sucked in by the battle. Rainbow dash just gave a worried glance towards her chosen fighter(cough crush cough). After the montage, Sonic is running as Cape Mario flies after him. Sonic activates his thunder shield and dashes over to a volcano with a sad face. Both the hedgehog and the plumber end up inside the volcano, staring at each other on opposite sides. A Bob-omb is caught between them. Alarmed, the Bob-omb informs several other Bob-ombs that their home is being apparently invaded by intruders. “Uh-oh…” everyone squeaked out in fear, all except the Pink party pony who was looking at the Bob-omb with childlike glee. Mario: Mama mia! “Yay! EXPLOSIONS!!” screamed the pink pony in glee. The Bob-ombs exploded, sending Mario and Sonic flying. Sonic lands in a lake but activates his Bubble shield to keep him breathing. However, Frog Mario ground pounds him, deactivating his shield. Sonic tries to jump out of the water, but no avail. “YOU JERK!” yelled the enraged blue mare. (*Cues: Out of Breath - Vivid Sounds x Hybrid Colors: Sonic Colors*) As soon the song plays, knowing he couldn't stay down any longer due to lack of swimming, Sonic tries to run out of the water before he drowns, but his efforts are futile much to Rainbow dash's horror. . Frog Mario swims up into the surface, until... “What's going to happen?” whispered Fluttershy. Sonic: Now I'll show you! (*Cues: Sonic The Hedgehog - Final Boss (Bak.R)*) Super Sonic hits Frog Mario and emerges from the lake. Team sonic cheered as they saw their fighter continue to fight even when it looked like he was done for. Super Sonic: How's that plumber? “YAAAA!! GO SONIC!!” Rainbow cheered, completely ignoring the groups laughter at the mares cheering. Mario: (*gets his Metal cap out*) Woohoo! “Oh… there's that.” muttered the blue mare as she saw the Plumber pull out one of his aces. Mario slaps on his metal cap, becoming Metal Mario. (*Cues: Metal Mario Theme - Super Mario 64*) Super Sonic tries to attack him, but Metal Mario grabs him and throws him aside. Super Sonic tries a few more attacks but to no avail. After Metal Mario sidekicks Super Sonic away, he produces a power star. “Metal cap and a power star?” muttered the princess of friendship. Truly a deadly combo,” added in Luna. (*Cues: Starman Theme - Super Mario Galaxy*) Using the combined powers of the metal cap and the power star, he attacks Sonic with the Mario Tornado, only for the power to suddenly wear off. “The powers must of overloaded each other,” explained Twilight. “Well that's good for sonic,” Rarity says relieved. Super Sonic: So you're tougher than I thought, huh? Now it's time for me to finish... this... “What he doing?” everyone wondered Mario produces a Mega Mushroom and becomes Mega Mario. “Crap…” team sonic muttered. Super Sonic/ Rainbow Dash: Whoa... (*Cues: Sonic 3 - Final Boss Theme (Orchestral)*) Super Sonic continuously attacks Mega Mario, but his attacks do very little. Instead, Mega Mario punches Super Sonic away and the power of the Chaos Emeralds wears off, causing Super Sonic to return to peak physical bluish form. Sonic/Rainbow Dash: Uh-oh. “Well at least he’s not exhausted anymore,” Fluttershy said. Sonic falls to the floor. His only option is to run as Mega Mario gives chase after he uses the Figure 8 technique. Sonic: You're too slow! “Go sonic go!” yelled Rainbow Dash while the rest of the team cheered for the blue blur. “Go Mario!!” cheered Team Mario. Sonic outruns Mega Mario, who returns to normal size, albeit a bit dizzy. “Oh no…” muttered Twilight. “What’s happening Twi?” asked Pinkie. Not understanding why Mario looked so dizzy. “While Mario might have more forms that grant him invincibility then sonic, none of them recharge him like sonic’s super form!” explained Twilight mutch to the horror of her teammates. “So you're saying…” trailed off spike, dread slowly feeling his voice. “While sonic just got a recharge, Mario is running on empty right now,” concluded Celestia. Mario: D'oh! After Mario was worn out, Sonic then returns back to the red capped plumber. “He’s got this!” Luna yelled in excitement along with Rainbow Dash. Sonic/Rainbow dash: Now's my/you’re chance! Sonic knocks Mario back and forward with the spin attack, while mid-air, Sonic then Axel Kicks Mario to the ground and spindashes the back of the downed plumber. The blue speedy hedgehog then jumps off of the bloodied red capped plumber. "hisss ooh" everyone winced at the brutal death and hearing Marios scream. K.O.! Results (*Cues: Greenhill Zone - (Videogame Orchestra)*) Boomstick: Now that's what I call a Death Battle! “Yeah, it was awesome how Sonic was fighting Mega Mario,” Rainbow said, throwing a few punches in the air. “Y’all had to root for your coltfriend, huh?” Applejack asked with a grin on her face. “SHUT. UP,” Rainbow growled, getting tired of the joke while blushing. Wiz: Their power-ups seemed evenly matched, countering blow for blow. Boomstick: Mario was even capable of countering the unstoppable Super Sonic! “That was a bit nerve wracking,” Rarity said, fanning herself. Wiz: But with their arsenals exhausted, Mario was no match for Sonic's natural speed. Even if they had used their lesser known power-ups like the ice flower or Super Emeralds, there's no reason to say the result would be any different. “You can only rely one power for so long,” Celestia said, having seen that happen before. Boomstick: Looks like Mario just couldn't keep up. this time it was both Pinkie AND Rainbow Dash who laughed at Boomstick's Joke. Wiz: The winner is Sonic the Hedgehog. END! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Boomstick: Next time on Death Battle! the screen is filled with mist as beautiful music started playing and an image of a lightning bolt appears on screen then a the scene switches to a young boy with black hair, glasses and a lighting bolt scar on his forehead. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ “Thank you Twilight for having us over again,” Celestia said while Luna nodded quietly. “Of course, Celestia. We’re always happy to have you over,” Twilight said, smiling a bit. “I wish you didn’t have to leave so soon,” she said, as her friends voiced their agreement. “We wish we could as well but we’re needed at the castle. Our nephew can only handle so much until even he snaps,” Luna said, imagining the blonde pulling his hair and wishing for his aunts to return. That caused a few ponies to snicker at that. Just as the princesses were about to leave, the box near them started to glow causing the sister to look at it curiously. The others had excited looks on their faces as Pinkie ran over and opened said box with the enthusiasm of a foul on hearth's warming day. “What’s inside the box this time?” Twilight said as the princesses looked on curiously. Pinkie stood up and said, “More comics and hats!!!” she cheered as she put on a copy of Mario’s hat. Red M and all that. Apple snickered and said, “Rainbow should get the comics. Ain’t right to keep her away from her crush.” This caused everyone in the room to snicker at the blue speedster. “Ha ha ha. Very funny,” Rainbow grumbled as she took the comics and a Sonic hat from the box. She then flew out an open window and towards her home as the others all said their goodbyes. With everyone gone, Spike went to Twilight and asked, “Hey, Twi. Have you heard anything from Starlight yet?” “No I haven’t, but I’m sure she’s fine. Besides what can go wrong for her?” Twilight asked, unaware she jinxed her friend/student. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Where in the world is Starlight Glimmer? ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ We find Starlight wondering in the frozen tundra of the Crystal empire as she tried to hold on to a worn out map. The cold was getting to her while the harsh winds made it a bit difficult to read the map. “Ok~ was I supposed to make a right at the mountain of doom or a left at the lake of frozen tears?” asked the cold mare as she tighten the jacked she brought with her and mad her way towards an ominous looking mountain in the distance. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ CHAPTER END! NEXT TIME LUKE SKYWALKER VS HARRY POTTER. Luke Skywalker VS Harry Potter.Twilight let out a huge yet sad sigh as she just stared at the window. The reason for her current state was that all her friends were busy for the day. Applejack had to tend to her farm, Rarity needed to work on some orders, Fluttershy had to take care of her animal friends, Rainbow was strangely absent while Pinkie was planning a party. “Oh come on, Twi. We can still watch an episode if you want,” Spike said, poking her sides. “I know Spike, but it’s not the same without our friends being here,” Twilight said, not moving an inch. “Twi, you have to stop mopping. So what if we don’t have any of our friends here. It’s not like a solution is just gonna knock on our door or something,” Spike said, waving his arms in the air. Then suddenly, as if god heard their plea, a loud yet rapid knocking noise was coming from their front door. Twilight looked at Spike with a look that screamed “”Really?” “It’s probably just Derpy delivering the mail,” Spike said, walking towards the door. Once he was a foot away from the door, it suddenly opened and knocked Spike into the wall. A pony walked through the doorway wearing a purple hat and cape as she said, “The Great and Powerful Trixie ...would like to know where her friend is.” Twilight shook her head and looked at the new arrival. “What do you mean Trixie?” Twilight asked confused. The blue showpony said, “I’ve been waiting for the last three days for Starlight to return from her trip. I’ve heard nothing from her and thought you might of.” “Sorry Trixie, but we haven’t heard anything from her,” Twilight said, wondering what her friend/student was doing at the moment. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~where in the world is Starlight Glimmer~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Starlight could only gawk as she stared at the never ending horizon of sand in front of her. A completely different terrain from the snowy landscape we saw her in beforehand. “HOW!?” the young mare cry’d. Completely confused on how she ended up in the DESERT of all places. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ “She’s probably having fun wherever she is,” Spike said, waving his hand dismissively. “Who’s having fun?” two voices said behind Spike. Looking back at the doorway, the three see two ponies just standing there. The first one was a black and white striped mare wearing a few pieces of gold jewelry with a mohawk. The other one was a creamed colored mare with a red mane that had a purple stripe. The most distinct features of this mare was that she had a black sweater and a braid for the top of her head. They were Zecora, the resident potion maker, and Moondancer, Twilight’s old friend, respectively. “Zecora! Moondancer! It’s good to see you, but why are you two hear?” asked the princess of friendship. “Hello Twilight, I came to drop off some more potions for you and to see if your alright.” rhymed the Zebra sage. “And i came over for a surprise visit,” said Moondancer with a smile as she adjusted her glasses. “And I guess I wasted my time coming here,” muttered Trixie. While Twilight was trying to think on what to do with the three unexpected visitors. But before she could think of anything, spike tapped her shoulder to get her attention. “Why not let them stay?” Spike asked, gaining everypony’s attention. “They can watch an episode with us and it could be fun to see how they react to it.” “Well…” Twilight said, feeling a bit unsure. “C’mon, it’ll be fun,” Spike said, grinning happily while holding his arm out wide. Twilight thought it over for a moment, trying to weigh the pros and cons. She did want to see the next episode and her friends did say they’ll watch it later. Besides it would be nice to spend time with some of her other friends. With that in mind, Twilight looked at new guests and nodded. “Your right Spike,” Twilight said smiling. “How about it, do you want to watch a show with us?” The three mares gave her a questioning look before they decided to see what the Princess of friendship wanted to show them. And once they all made it to the ballroom, twilight was quick to get them to seat in front of the television and hit play. Interlude (*Cues: Invader - Jim Johnston*) The three mares jump at the sudden intense music and marveled at the title screen. Twilight and Spike couldn't help but laugh a little at their reaction. Wiz: Every generation has idolized a Sci-Fi hero. “So it’s a battle between heroes?” questioned Trixie not really sure she wasted to see two heroes kill each other, The other two mares unknowingly thinking the same thing. Boomstick: Like Luke Skywalker, Legacy of the Jedi… “That’s a really mystic sounding title,” commented Moondancer. Getting a nod from the other two unicorns and one drake, but Zecora was giving the screen a strange look.” Wiz: ...and Harry Potter, the Boy who lived. “Why does that title feel like it has so much sadness behind it?” asked Twilight. Boomstick: He's Wiz and I'm Boomstick. Wiz: And it's our job to analyze their weapons, armor, and skills to find out who would win a Death Battle. Luke Skywalker (*Cues: Star Wars Rogue Squadron III - Mission Complete*) Wiz: As the orphaned son of Darth Vader, Luke Skywalker carries the blood of the most powerful sith lord ever known. He was raised by his aunt and uncle, who kept him safe by disguising his true powers before being taught by a wise old mentor in the ways of the force. The girls and one drake could not help but feel bad for someone who lived their life not knowing one day, they would have a great Burden thrust upon them. “The poor soul has such a great burden,” muttered Moondancer. “It’s truly sad to see someone struggling, while also greatly Hurting.” rhymed Zecora. “The great and sadden Trixie agrees,” added in Trixie. Background Height: 5'7" Weight: 169 Ibs Raised as a Farmer Prosthetic Right Hand Son of Anakin Skywalker, the Chosen One Married to Mara Jade Boomstick: Luke's weapon of choice is the Lightsaber, a combination of my two favorite killing tools: swords and lasers. Lightsaber Custom Built Approx. 4 Ft. Blade Cuts Through Most Objects Based on Kenobi's Saber Expends No Heat or Energy Until Physical Contact Uses Form V (Djiem So) “Ooh~,” marveled Twilight. Eyes sparkling with a need to study it. “Oh boy, seems like Princess has found a new toy to study,” snarked Trixie. “(giggle) reminds me of the time a new spell would be shown to us in class back in school,” giggled MoonDancer. Getting a few laughs from Spike and Zecora. Wiz: Despite having little formal training, Luke advanced in lightsaber combat much faster than any other Jedi. “So a natural born prodigy huh?” MoonDancer asked. Zecora was about to answer her but before the zebra could utter a single word the world froze and all color was gone. “Deadman what are you doing?” the disembodied voice of Trepp asked. “I’m just going to tweak a few things in this world to get the story flowing!” replied the angry voice of said hot head (HA get it!?). “You know that will just catches Harmony's attention a lot sooner right?” questioned the Bored Chaos god. “DON’T CARE!!!” the crazed god screamed in replied, much to his blue friend’s annoyance and with the sounds similar to someone snapping their fingers. The world’s color returned and everything started to move again, and finally Zecora continued to speak. “Only natural when he has the blood of a powerful warrior in his veins,” explained the zebra without rhyming. Boomstick: He even took down a freakin' TIE fighter with it, only a month after he blew up the Death Star. What a badass! “Such skill in such a short amount of time!?” Twilight yelled. It took her years of training to get her where she was right now. “Even the great and powerful Trixie is impressed,” marveled Trixie. Getting nod of agreement from everyone else. Wiz: Luke is a master of Form V (Djiem So), an aggressive combat stance with defensive postures, specializing in both perseverance and pressuring an opponent. “Sounds pretty aggressive.” commented Moondancer. “My kind of fighting style,” commented Trixie with a smirk. Boomstick: Despite what you might think, the lightsaber isn't just for killing; it also works pretty damn well for defense. “So a weapon that beats our weapon’s by a mile is also a good shield?” Deadpanned Trixie. Wiz: Even so, Luke's most instrumental tool is his unrivaled connection to the Force. He can apply it in three aspects: Control, Sense, and Alter; controlling all aspects of the body, sensing and utilizing his surroundings, and altering the environment. The Force Surrounds All Living Things Control - Manipulating the aspects of one's body Sense - Recognizing & immersing in environment Alter - Manipulating subjects & environment This caught the three magic user’s attention, a different form of power was something rare to hear about. Boomstick: Like the mind trick thingy! Oh man... the terrible things I would do with that. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~meanwhile with Rarity.~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ “GODDAMENT BOOMSTICK!!!” screamed an enraged Rarity, scaring a confused Sweetie Bell who was wondering why her big sister was screaming to the heavens with such rage. “And who the heck is Boomstick?” the little filly asked herself as she watch her sister continued to yell profanity into the air. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ (*Cues: Star Wars Episode VI - Sail Barge Assault*) Wiz: When injured or exhausted, he can push his physical limits with the force body ability, and use flash burn to neglect pain until he can mend his wounds with force heal. “What a wide variety of skills to heal oneself,” Zecora said impressed. “It’s good to see someone take the time to learn something that can save one’s life,” agreed Moondancer. Boomstick: Also, Luke uses the force to move things with his mind, with almost no limits! “So like our levitation?” asked the three magic users, not noticing the annoyed look Zecora was sporting after hearing that question. Wiz: Finally, Luke can use Shatterpoint to identify any possible weakness or fracture in a subject. Add just a little pressure with the force... Boomstick: ...and BOOM! They explode faster than a Firestone tire! That made the girls and one dragon pale a little at such a vicious power. Force Abilities Force Persuasion Increased Senses Increased Speed & Strength Force Choke Telekinesis Shatterpoint Wiz: Luke has defeated a wide variety of foes, ranging from stormtroopers to deadly Sith lords, one of which Luke had to construct a second Lightsaber to beat. Boomstick: His shorter red Shoto Saber was made to counter the Sith Luminous' Lightwhip, and it worked pretty damn well. “It always good to think and plane, as to better get around any situation,” Trixie said. Getting a surprised look from Twilight and Spike. “Wow Trixie! That was really wise,” complemented Twilight. Spike nodding his head in agreement “Well of course! You need to do this kind of things when you work as a performer,” bragged Trixie. Wiz: He still carries it, though prefers a single blade over two handed combat. “Well at least he still has it for emergencies,” Zecora said. Shoto Saber Shorter, Red Blade Approx. 2 Ft. Blade Used in Jar'Kai Form Used Sparingly Boomstick: Ha, Ha, penis joke. Anyways, Luke doesn't have an obvious weakness, aside from some pretty serious daddy issues. He doesn't carry a blaster, but unlike other stupid Jedi, he isn't afraid to use one. “Wish more heroes would be willing to do that more,” grumbled Spike. Remembering a few times in his power pony comics where one of the heroes refused to even use a simple pipe to defend themselves when they lost their powers. Wiz: While Luke is no fan of violence, he certainly will not pull any punches. “Just means he won’t be the first to throw the first punch,” commented Moondancer. “Well at least he’s not some hot headed buffoon,” said Trixie. “I wanna learn how to use the force,” Twilight added in. getting a smirk from Zecora after she heard the young alicorn voice her need to learn about the mysterious power of the Force. Luke Skywalker: I am a Jedi, like my father before me. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ The group had to admit that luke was a really strong warrior and Twilight even said he was a well rounded fighter. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Harry Potter (*Cues: Harry Potter - Hedwig's Theme*) Wiz: As an orphan, Harry Potter carries the talents of the most powerful dark wizard ever known: Lord Voldemort. He was raised by his aunt and uncle, who kept him safe by disguising his true power before being taught by a wise old mentor in the ways of magic. “Why does the sound familiar,” Trixie deadpanned. Boomstick: Now why does that sound familiar? “That’s what Trixie said you dumb exploding stick!” snarled Trixie, getting a few laughs from the rest of the group. Background Height: N/A [Tall] Weight: N/A [Skinny] Born July 31, 1980 Half-Blood Wizard Accidentally Cursed to Carry Voldemort's Powers Married to Ginny Weasley Wiz: Harry wields an 11 inch phoenix core holly wand. He has learned many spells and is exceptionally skilled in charms. Wand Length: 11 in. Make: Holly Core: Phoenix Feather Described as "Nice & Supple" Brother to Voldemort's Wand Boomstick: His trademark attack is the disarming charm, Expelleraptamus... or whatever. Wiz: Expelliarmus. Boomstick: ...Which can either knock a weapon away or throw the opponent through the air. “A pretty useful skill to use when you want to end a fight without bloodshed,” said Zecora. “Or to make it easier to kill an opponent who can’t fight back.” countered Trixie darkly. Getting ones like Moondancer and Spike to feel uncomfortable and and those like Zecora and Twilight nod in understanding. Wiz: The Confundus charm temporarily confuses the target, “That could of helped in some situations,” grumbled Twilight thinking about all the times it could of help to just zap her opponents into confusions. (*Cues: Fireworks - Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince (End Credit Version)*) Wiz: Stupefy stuns people, and the shield charm protects Harry from all attacks. “Simple enough,” commented Moondancer as she watch the list of spells being shown on TV. Boomstick: And he can summon anything he wants to him with Accio. *clears throat* Accio money! Accio loose women! Damn! The group didn’t even want to comment on the last one… ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ With Rarity… Again. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ “RAAAAAAAA!!!” screamed Rarity, filled with a sudden rage and flipped the table she was working on. “What now!?” cried Sweetie Bell. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ “Though the money part doesn't sound too bad,” mumbled Trixie. Charms Expelliarmus [Disarms] Confundus [Confuses] Stupefy [Stuns] Protego [Shields] Patronus [Shields from Dark Creatures] Accio [Summons Objects] Wiz: His firebolt is a racing broom that can reach 150 miles per hour in less than 10 seconds. “Meh Rainbow Dash can go faster,” commented Spike, getting some questioning looks from the rest of the group. “What? Just thought if rainbow dash wasn’t her to say it, i might as well do it for her.” explained the young drake. Firebolt Broomstick 0 to 150 mph in 10 seconds Braking Charm Perfect Balance Streamlined Ash Individually Selected Twigs of Aerodynamic Perfection Boomstick: That's even faster than Wiz getting shot down by a woman! That got a round of laughter from the group. Wiz: Right!... wait, no! Back to spells! Harry is also experienced in curses. He destroys objects with Reducto, slashes enemies with Sectumsempra, and controls minds with Imperius. “My kind of spells,” grinned Trixie before getting smacked in the back of the head by a glaring Princess. “No killing magic!” she told a pouting Trixie. Boomstick: And then there's the killing curse... abra cadabra. Wiz: Avada Kedavra. “Ok even i don’t want to learn that spell,” Trixie admitted. “Though it begs the question on why harry knows it.” wondered Moondancer. Boomstick: Oh. That magician wasn't trying to kill me. I guess I should probably go apologize to his family. While most of the group where wide eyed at that little tidbit, Trixie could only facehoof at boomstick stupidity. Curses Reducto [Destroys Objects] Sectumsempra [Slashes] Oppugno [Objects Attack] Imperio [Controls Minds] Crucio [Causes Pain] Avada Kedavra [The Killing Curse] Wiz: While Harry's never used the killing curse, it is implied that he can. It is an instant kill and unblockable. “Well at least it’s only implied,” Moondancer sighed in relief. Boomstick: Unless it hits a wall... or a sword... or anything really. “Unblockable, my flank,” Moondancer said, thinking that was stupid. If a spell is unblockable then it should be unblockable. Wiz: Almost all magic requires a line of sight and eye contact to perform. The killing curse is no exception. “Makes sense, even the most potent of spells have a limit,” explained Twilight. Boomstick: Harry also knows appara... teleporting, and can do it without a wand. “Pretty impressive for someone without a horn,” Trixie admitted. “Even Twilight has a hard time with it,” Spike said as Twilight playfully glared at him. Apparition Teleportation Long Range Instantaneous Does Not Require a Wand Possibly Easier to Do With a Wand Wiz: His training in Occlumency defends his mind from any sort of mental attack or illusion. “Really wish i had that kind of training…” muttered Twilight. Remembering the illusions that Sombra left as a trap, that nearly beaten her. Occlumency Prevents Mind Control & Mind Reading Has Not Mastered, but is Adequate Unconventionally Uses a Fond Memory as a Shield Boomstick: And he's got all sorts of other spells, but I seriously doubt the tickle charm's gonna help him much in the fight, so let's move on. “Pinkie could make it work,” Spike said causing the mares in the room to nod their heads in agreement. Wiz: Harry owns the Cloak of Invisibility, an unrelenting Deathly Hallow that hides the wearer from sight and cannot be detected. “Trixie could use a cloak like that,” Trixie said, marveling at the design. She made a note to see if she could do that to her own cloak. Cloak of Invisibility The Third Deathly Hallow Does Not Wear Out Hides the Wearer Cannot Be Detected Unless the Wearer Allows it Boomstick: Unless he makes a noise or pokes his foot out. Wiz: Harry is a quick draw with his wand and has performed many great feats at very young ages. He has also mastered non-verbal spells. “He would of been a top student along with me and Moondancer back in Celestia’s school of gifted unicorns,” commented Twilight. Getting a nod from the glasses wearing unicorn in agreement. Boomstick: By the time he was 17, he was beating up way more experienced wizards. In the battle for Hogwarts, he had no problem kicking a ton of Death Eater ass. Not to mention, Lord Voldemort himself. Everyone was quite impressed with the skill that some at such a young age had. Wiz: Afterwards, Harry became head of the Dark Wizard Hunting Aura office, even though he is technically a Hogwarts drop-out. Boomstick: He never did finish that seventh year, but I guess if you killed the lord of ultimate evil, you'd get a G.E.D. "Can't argue with that," commented Trixie much to the annoyance of a certain alicorn princess. Harry uses his wand on a candle in a jar, which creates a huge fire. He then uses another spell to put it out. Harry: Crudicio! Wiz: Alright the combatants are set, let's end this debate once and for all. But first, let me recommend Carbonite. Boomstick: For all your Han Solo freezing needs. Wiz: Uh, no Boomstick, it's a website. Boomstick: What? ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ The group agreed that harry was a skilled magic user and had a good chance at winning. And as the ads played everyone quickly form teams. On team Luke we had Twilight and Zecora. And on team Harry, we had Trixie, Spike, and Moondancer. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Boomstick: But right now, it's time for a Death Battle! Death Battle In Cloud City, Luke is standing when he notices Harry Potter walking towards him with his wand drawn. He activates his Lightsaber while Harry stops in his tracks. "This should be good,”Trixie said. FIGHT! Harry: Avada Kedavr... Just as Harry is about to use the killing curse, Luke uses Force Persuasion to stop him. However, Harry manages to break free using occlumency. He then prepares once again to cast the killing curse. “That was smart, trying to stop the battle before it even starts,” commented Twilight. “Too bad Harry has trained against mind control,” added in Trixie. (*Cues: Star Wars Episode III - Battle of Heroes*) Harry: Avada Kedavr... Harry is once again interrupted by Luke, who uses Force Push to knock him back. Luke then leaps towards Harry with his Lightsaber swinging, but Harry uses apparition to teleport away from him. When he reappears, Harry proceeds to fire non-verbal spells at Luke, which he deflects with his Lightsaber. Luke leaps at Harry once again, but he teleports out of the way again. “Man the only time i somepony teleport that much was when Twilight was fighting tirek,” said Spike. Remembering seeing his Sister figure fight the evil centaur in the distance while hr and the rest of the mane six were stuck in a steel cage. Harry: Expelliarmus! He fires that, as well as a few more non-verbal spells, but Luke blocks all of them before using the Force to knock Harry's wand out of his hand. Luke charges at Harry, who teleports to the wand. Harry: Accio Firebolt! “He summoned his broom?” Moondancer questioned. Luke throws his Lightsaber at Harry. Harry: Protego! Protego deflects the Lightsaber, which Luke leaps up to catch. He is suddenly hit by the firebolt, which knocks him back to the ground while Harry is lifted onto it and rides off on it. Harry flies by multiple times while firing his non-verbal spells, all of which Luke is able to deflect or block. Luke then manages to catch Harry and the Firebolt with the Force and causes them to crash downward into the roof. Afterwards, Harry disappears with the aid of the Cloak of Invisibility while Luke is unable to detect his opponent's presence. “Smart,” everyone admitted. (*Cues: Star Wars Battlefront II - Anakin Skywalker/Darth Vader Theme*) Harry: Confundo! Luke throws his lightsaber in the direction where he hears Harry. Harry: Stu... Harry teleports out of the way of the incoming lightsaber. Harry: Stupefy! “Almost reminds me of my battle with Starlight,” commented Twilight as she was reminded of one of her most frustrating battles. Luke rolls to avoid stupefy, then catches his lightsaber and uses Force Push, knocking the Cloak of Invisibility off of Harry. Luke then uses Force Choke, lifting Harry into the air and stopping him from casting any verbal spells. Luke throws his lightsaber towards Harry, who casts a nonverbal spell, which manages to hit the lightsaber’s handle, destroying it. “Well there goes his weapon,” gloated Trixie, but the two members of team Luke just calmly watches the screen. (*Cues: The Battle of Hoth (Part 2) - Star Wars Episode V*) Afterwards, Harry is freed. Harry: Avada Kedavra! Luke rolls once again, evading the killing curse. Harry fires multiple non-verbal spells at Luke, who blocks them using the Force. Harry: Sectumsempra! Luke is caught off-guard by the attack and is left with a wound to his side, “Ha check and mate princess!” gloated Trixie while Moondancer was surprised she beat her alicorn friend in something. “I wouldn't be so sure trixie,” Zecora cutted in with a smile. “Huh?” the three members of team Harry said in confusion. “Just watch,” Twilight said with a smile similar to Zecora’s. but then uses shatterpoint. Over on Harry's forehead, Luke finds the weak point he needs in Harry's iconic lightning bolt scar. Harry's wounds begin to expand, eventually causing blood to spurt from it. Harry screams in agony as Luke takes out his shoto saber with the Force, then throws it at Harry, killing him. Winced at the brutal method that Luke tuke to win. “Man that’s brutal,”Spike winced out, still hearing Harry’s screams in his mind. K.O.! Results (*Cues: Star Wars Episode IV - The Throne Room*) Boomstick: Man, Harry did a surprisingly good job keeping Luke at a distance. “Smart thing to do when your opponent has a sword that can cut through anything.” Zecora said Wiz: But Luke fought smart and tried to finish Harry off quickly with Force Persuasion, but Harry was able to resist thanks to occlumency. "Again a smart move on his part,” Twilight repeated. Boomstick: Then Luke used Force Choke to stop Harry from casting spells. Wiz: And although Luke can dodge the Avada Kedavra, the instantaneous Sectumsempra curse caught him off-guard. But with Shatterpoint, Luke discovered an exploitable flaw. The group still winced at the brutal attack from earlier. Boomstick: That famous lightning bolt scar, which Forced Harry to lose the battle. “... stupid,” muttered Trixie at hearing Boomsticks pun. Wiz: The winner is Luke Skywalker. END. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ (this episode didn’t have a preview for the next battle.) ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ After the episode was done each of the three members said their goodbyes to their lavender friends and one little Drake, and Twilight handed out some gifts that the Magic Box produced. For the three magic users: they each got the complete set of the Harry Potter books. For Spike: he was given a few star wars comics. And Zecora was given a crystal Necklaces that was supposed to be like the ones that force users used to make lightsabers. And with that Twilight waved her friends of as she made her way to her room to start reading her new set of books. ~~~~~~~~~~~~ an hour later, Zecora’s hut. ~~~~~~~~~~~~ As Zecora made her way into her hut she quickly made herself some herbal tea and sat down near the fire. Enjoying the calm atmosphere that she was wrapped in. After taking a sip of her tea, she let out a soft chuckle as she closed her eye’s. “How odd, I didn’t think when I woke up today i would be seeing a show that featured ANOTHER force user,” Zecora idly commented as a cylinder shaped object floated near her and with a loud hiss a green blade shot out of it. “I wonder how old master Yoda is doing,” wondered Zecora as she took another sip of her tea. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Chapter end! Next time, Chun-li vs Mai shiranui. Chun-Li VS Mai Shiranui.We find the full group back together at the usual spot ready to continue watching the otherworldly show and maybe learn something about themselves and- “You're rambling again Mr. narrator,” interrupted Pinkie Pie. Wait no! We’re not doing this again! “Sorry but last chapter was late so we need to move on,” she apologised. B-but life lessons! “We’re not here for life lessons!” she yelled. “We’re here to see fighters kill each other or in the reader’s case, watch Rarity go crazy because of Boomy’s pervy commentary on today’s fighter!” she continued. B-but!!! “No buts! We’r skipping to the story!” the pink pony said as she grabbed the remote. Son of a BI-!!! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Interlude (*Cues: Invader - Jim Johnston*) Wiz: When it comes to fighting, combatants come in all shapes and sizes. Boomstick: And I'm liking the shapes and sizes on these two. “Oh sweet Celestia no,” Rarity whispered in complete horror. Wiz: Chun-Li, the strongest woman in the world… “I wouldn’t mind fighting her,” Rainbow said, taking the title as a challenge. Boomstick: And Mai Shiranui, the queen of fighters. “A queen!? Maybe we should of brought the princesses over,” Pinkie Pie suggested. “You know to continue that whole royalty joke the author thought he was clever by using?” she said cheekily towards the reader. Bite me. Wiz: He's Boomstick and I'm Wizard and it's our job to analyze their weapons, armor, and skills to find out who would win a Death Battle. Chun-Li (*Cues: Street Fighter II - China Street Beat: OcRemix*) Wiz: Chun-Li, first lady of the fighting game. Boomstick: Famous for abusing the Thigh Master. “What’s a thigh master?” Applejack said, getting nothing but shrugs. Wiz: Chun-Li is a detective for Interpol, and has gone through a rudimentary police combat training. She has also trained with Gen, a friend of her father's and legend of the Chinese Fighting Underworld. “A detective, huh,” Rarity said, taking a good look at her. “She doesn’t look like one but I love her outfit.” “It is fancy looking,” Spike said, blushing as he imagined his crush wearing the outfit. Boomstick: But she never did finish her training with him. Does anyone ever finish their training? Seriously! Well, I guess it's not totally her fault, after Bison killed her dad, Gen just kinda disappeared on her. What a dick! “What kind of teacher just walks out on his student when they need them most?” seethed Twilight. Angered at the fact that Chun-li’s teacher would do that. Rainbow Dash was also glaring at the screen, she would never stop teaching Scootaloo how to fly unlike this guy who walked out his student. Wiz: Since then, Chun-Li's been chasing after Bison for vengeance. She has trained in defense of Tai Chi, and is skilled in a fast-paced kickboxing variant of Kenpo. She prefers speed over strength, using a combination of rapid strikes to pressure an opponent. Background Height: 5'6" Weight: Secret Detective for Interpol Trained with Gen Skilled in Tai Chi & Kenpo Bust/Waist/Hip: 34" / 22" / 35" “Vengeance is never the answer,” Twilight said, shaking her head sadly. “Her fighting styles seem interesting though.” “If we can learn them, I wouldn’t mind knowing a few moves,” Rainbow said, liking Chun Li’s speed. Boomstick: And if you can't tell by looking at 'em, her legs are pretty damn powerful. She can even kick people through solid brick. Still, her strength doesn't just lie in those legs. She's strong enough to toss things around as big as a couch. “She’d be welcomed in the Apple household,” Applejack said, feeling she could get along with the fighter. “She could help me with my animal friends,” Fluttershy (*Cues: Chun-Li's Theme - Steet Fighter Third Strike China*) Wiz: Her main attacks include the unbelievably fast Lightning Legs, the unpredictable Axe Kick, and the physics defying Spinning Bird Kick. “Holy cow! I gotta admit that’s an interesting way to fly,” Rainbow said. Not caring that it looked silly, anyone who can pull that off was cool in her book. Boomstick: I wouldn't mind taking a ride on that helicopter! “Sorry mister but you're not allowed on this ride,” growled out Rarity. Attacks Lightning Legs Axe Kick [Hazanshu] Spinning Air Kick Stomp Kick Spinning Bird Kick Senretsu Kyaku Wiz: She can also focus her natural Ki energy to create the Kikoken, a slow, limited ranged attack. “At least she has a ranged attack,” Pinkie said, not looking to impressed with the attack. Boomstick: And the Kikosho is basically a super version of that: an enormous ball of energy strong enough to stop a speeding car. The group didn’t know what a car was but it still sounded impressive. Ki Attacks Kikoken Kikosho Wiz: Her detective skills were instrumental in taking down the criminal organization, Shadaloo; and after the tournaments, Chun-Li became a martial arts teacher. However, she has yet to win any major tournament, and failed to kill Bison to avenge her father. She was able to rescue one of her students from Urien, but turns out Urien let her win, wanting only to test her skills. “She defeated a criminal organization? That’s pretty cool,” Spike said, imaging her as a hero. “It’s nice to see that she’s teaching others. It feels good to know that you’re helping the younger generation learn how to defend themselves,” Twilight said, seeing herself in Chun Li somewhat. Boomstick: Also, it seems Chun ends up having to be rescued a lot, usually by Guile. “Teehee I smell shipping~” Rarity sang. Wiz: Oddly enough, her most noble award is placing sixth in an International Shooting Competition, despite rarely carrying a gun. “That’s impressive for a gal who barely carries a weapon on her,” complemented Applejack. Feats Took down Shadaloo Christened the "Strongest Woman in the World" Honorary X-Men member Martial Arts Teacher Never Defeated Bison Defeated Urien [Kind of] Boomstick: Well, I guess things wouldn't be too fair if she brought a gun to a Street Fight. Round One... BANG! WINNER! “Wish we could do that with our rainbow power’s.” muttered Fluttershy. Wiz: Despite this, Chun-Li is certainly capable of holding her own, and has been consistently proven to be one of the toughest contenders in the Street Fighter tournaments. Chun-Li: You ready for this? ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ After a close discussion, the girls agreed that Chun Li was strong despite having a few flaws. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Mai Shiranui (*Cues: Flame Dragon God 'Theme of Mai Shiranui' (Arranged) - Fatal Fury Special*) Wiz: Mai Shiranui is... well... Boomstick: Holy crap, look at those things! Rarity was half tempted to pull out the bottle of wine she brought with her right her and now. Wiz: Mai is a ninja of the Shiranui Clan and has been trained by both her grandfather and the perverted, yet famously deadly, Jubei Yomato. “And her grandfather trusted her with that shameless lecher.” demanded Rarity. Boomstick: He brought a whole new meaning to 'wax on, wax off'! This confused everyone as they didn’t understand what that meant but Rarity felt like she should be angry anyway. Wiz: She has extensive training in the Shiranui Ryu fighting styles. From her grandfather, Mai learned the Koppo-ken technique, specializing in pressure points and bone snapping. With Jubei, Mai trained in close-combat Judo. Boomstick: Mai's pretty fast, but focuses on single powerful strikes to punch through an enemy's defenses. The only downside to this is if she misses one, she's left wide open. (chuckles) “Don’t think I didn’t catch that one Boomstick!” yelled Rarity, feeling a head Height: 5'5" Weight: 106 Ibs Shiranui Clan Ninja Trained by Grandfather & Jubei in Hoppo-ken & Judo Bust/Waist/Hip: 87" / 55" / 91" (*Cues: Goenitz Theme - The King of Fighters 2002 Unlimited Match*) Wiz: Her Flying Squirrel Furiante and Deadly Ninja Bee attacks help her control the field of battle, and she uses clever fake-outs to trip up her foes. “So she uses speed and tricks to take out stronger opponents,” analyzed Twilight. “Sounds like a fighting style i can get behind,” commented a grinning Rainbow Dash. “Sure ya just don’t to impress sonic?” said cheeky Applejack. Getting a frustrated yell from her rainbow friend. Attacks Flying Squirrel Furiante Deadly Ninja Bees Folding Fan Fandango Windmill Waster Hacho San [Fan Throw] Bushin [Shadow Images] Boomstick: And she has an unlimited amount of Steel Fans she can throw, which I guess she keeps in her non-existing bra. “How does she do that?” Twilight asked, trying to understand what magic Mai was using. “Boomstick,” Rarity growled, getting even angrier than before. Seeing his crush like this, Spike scooted away from her slowly. Wiz: That's right… “What?” everyone asked stunned. Boomstick: Really? I was just making a joke about her giant boobs. The temptation to down her wine bottle was getting stronger. Wiz: Speaking of her... outfits... Boomstick: Or lack thereof... “Shut. it!” Rarity gritted out. “She looks like she’s going to explode at any moment,” Spike whispered to the rest of the group. Wiz: While it's unrestricted, it isn't exactly form-fitting either. However, as a testament to her training and balance, it doesn't seem to bother her. “Doesn't bother me either…” Spike muttered under his breath. (*Cues: Esaka (Japan Team Theme) - King of Fighters '96*) Wiz: She wears it for Kunoichi, a female ninja method of sexually distracting a foe before striking. Boomstick: ...I'm sorry, what? I was distracted. Spike was thankful that his friends were watching the show, so they don’t see his blush. Wiz: Never mind. Butterfly Fans Steel Unlimited Supply Used in Close-Quarters & as a Ranged Projectile Flammable Boomstick: Okay, Mai can create fire and explosions, and she can control whatever fire she's created. “That could be useful,” Rarity said, happy to hear something that can’t be sexualized by Boomstick. “It does seem better than Chun Li’s chi attacks,” Twilight said, after seeing Mai’s skills with her fire power. Pyrokinesis Creates Fire & Explosions Ryu En Bu Attack Burning Mai Attack Channels Fire Through Clothes & Objects Wiz: Mai consistently enters the King of Fighters tournaments to support herself, her Self proclaimed fiancé, Andy Bogard. However, she has yet to win any major tournament, nor has she ever made a great impact in taking down the bosses. Feats Mastered Stealth & Ninjitsu Does Well in Tournaments Formed the Women's Team Never Won a Tourney Has Only Made Minor Impacts in Plots “So she’s a lower tier fighter then her friends.” Twilight theorized. “I’m sure she helps out as much as she can,” said Fluttershy. Boomstick: Or taking down Andy! “Stop talking like that!” Screamed Rarity. “Wow Rarity almost sounds like your little bit jealo-” Applejack teased before her words died in her throat when Rarity gave her the most bloodthirsty stare ever. “If you even think of finishing that sentence Applejack I will go down to you house and replace everything with goudy city theme objects and have Pinkie Pie paint your farmhouse!” threaten Rarity to a frighten Applejack. “Ooh! I even have some glitter paint to!” cheered the Pink Pony. causing Applejack to pale even further. Wiz: She always does well, though, even joining Andy's award winning team in 1999. Boomstick: Even so, she ends up having to be rescued a lot, usually by Andy. But for some reason, I don't seem to mind. Mai Shiranui: Mai Shiranui of the Shiranui School must teach you a lesson. Wiz: Alright, the combatants are set, let's end this debate once and for all. Boomstick: It’s time for a death battle! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ On teams chun li's team: Twilight, Rarity, and Applejack On mai’s team. Everyone else. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Death Battle (*Cues: Flame Dragon God 'Theme of Mai Shiranui' (Arranged) - Fatal Fury Special*) Mai Shiranui awaits her opponent in the middle of a deep forest. Chun-Li walks up and Mai gives her a respectful bow. “At least Mai is respecting her opponent.” Fluttershy said. FIGHT! Chun-Li starts off with a Kikoken, but due to the slow movement and limited range of the projectile, Mai easily rolls under it and starts delivering a fast barrage of low strikes and the Folding Fan Fandango, ending with a drop kick to knock back Chun-Li. She pauses for a moment before charging in to finish off her opponent. “Mais already starting of strong,” Twilight said as they all watched the battle continued. (*Cues: Chun Li's Theme - Marvel vs Capcom 3*) However, Chun-Li recovers and springs to her feet, kicking Mai in the face. She then flips over Mai's attempted Ryu En Bu Attack, and throws her back. Just as Mai gets back up, Chun-Li charges in with her Axe Kick, followed by several hard blows, and her Lightning Leg Attack. “And here comes Chun-li showing off those legs!” Applejack cheered Realizing that close-combat with Chun-Li is not favorable, Mai gets some distance and throws out three of her Hacho San (Butterfly Fans) with the third being powered by her pyrokinesis. She also leaps in. Chun-Lin blocks first two fans but is unable to block the third fiery one and Mai's simultaneous fire strike from above, taking both hits and an extra strike. Mai then attempts a fake-out with her Flying Squirrel Furiante, but Chun-Li anticipates the move and lets loose with a powered-up version of her Lightning Legs, causing Mai to take heavy damage and knocking her down. Chun-Li charges in but Mai manages to recover, flips over Chun-Li and trips her with a sweep kick. “This is getting so intense!!” yelled Spike as everyone else was sweating from the fight. Mai changes her strategy and begins leading Chun-Li in a chase up the tall trees. Each time they pass each other they exhange blows, but Mai manages to get another pyrokinetic strike, knocking Chun-Li down. Chun-Li retaliates and catches Mai off-guard with her Spinning Bird Kick. Mai is left dazed on a large tree limb, as Chun-Li lands and pauses to build up her ki to finish off her opponent. This is Chun-Li's final mistake as it is just enough time for Mai to recover and roll out of the way. Chun-Li's Kikosho Attack misses, and Mai uses her legs to grab Chun-Li's head, slam her into the tree limb, and then kick her into another tree. As Chun-Li falls, Mai follows her down in a fiery rolling attack, slamming into her opponent as she hits the forest floor. With Chun-Li standing in a fiery daze, Mai uses her pyrokinetic powers to engulf Chun-Li in a huge explosion of fire, leaving nothing but a charred skeleton, similar to Mortal Kombat's Scorpion's Fatality. Everyone look wide eyed at the brutal death. K.O.! Mai: Nippon Ichi! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Results Boomstick: Boobs win! “Sigh… just, just buck it.” sighed a defeated Rarity, too tired to get angry anymore. Wiz: Chun-Li maybe a bit tougher and quicker than Mai, and her professional training even prepared her for the fake out ruse. However, her arsenal pales in comparison to that of Mai's, with her pyrokinesis and steel fans, Mai had superior range and energy-based attacks. “She had the clear advantage from the beginning.” stated Twilight. Boomstick: And while Chun's a beast in close corners combat, her straightforward approach was a bad match up against Mai's ninja training. “Even I have to admit even I would have to play dirty against a pony with mai’s skill.” said Applejack. Wiz: It was certainly a close match, but Mai's nimbleness and firepower eventually won out. Boomstick: Chun-Li's never looked hotter. “Even i found that in poor taste,” muttered Pinkie Pie. Wiz: The Winner is Mai Shiranui. END! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Boomstick: Next time on Death Battle. They see an open field. They see a flying jet like vehicle fly overhead, they unexpectedly watch the vehicle "transform" as it shapeshifts into a more humanoid form. They also see a blur zoom past it and lands into the ground the creates a dust cloud. They were unable to see who the figure is as the video ends. STARSCREAM VS. RAINBOW DASH!!! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ The room was oddly silent after they saw the preview for the next battle. It took them a moment for their tiny little brains to process that the blue speedster of their group was gonna be on Death Battle. “AWWWWW YEEEAAAHHH! THIS IS GONNA BE AWESOME,” Rainbow yelled feeling very excited at the news. “But, how?” Rarity asked confused by this. “Rainbow’s gonna fight?” Fluttershy asked, hiding behind her hair. “A giant robot?” Applejack asked, not faring any better than her friends. “Yeah, it’s gonna be awesome,” Rainbow said, floating in front of her friends. “What’re you doing on the show!?” Her friends yelled. Rainbow covers her ears and said, “Can you not yell so loud? I’m right here.” “Darling, aren’t you even the least bit curious of why you’re on the show?” Rarity asked, worried for her friend. “Nope,” Rainbow said, not caring one bit. After she said that, her friends began yelling at her for her careless attitude This lasted for a couple of minutes as Applejack saw Spike and Twilight just sitting on the couch calmly. “Why’re you two just sitting there? Aren’t you the least bit curious why Rainbow is the show?” “Not really. This is obviously a part of the multiverse theory,” Twilight said, as if it was the simplest thing in the world. Everyone looked at Twilight and said, “Multiverse theory?” “Yeah. Multiverse theory means that there’s an infinite number of worlds where they’re different in some way or form. It’s like the world I go to and see Sunset or the world were Celestia and Luna were evil,” Twilight said, calming her friends down somewhat. “Well I don’t care about this theory. I refuse to see a friend of mine fight to the death,” Rarity said, walking towards the door. “I hear ya Rare. You can watch the episode if you want, I just don’t feel comfortable watching it,” Applejack said, following Rarity as Fluttershy nodded ad followed Applejack out the door. The four that stayed behind just stared at their retreating friends. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ CHAPTER END! NEXT TIME RAINBOW DASH VS STARSCREAM!!! Master Chief VS Doomguy.It’s a new day as Rainbow and her friends made their way to Twilight’s castle. Opening the door, they started to walk towards the viewing room as it was dubbed. “Hey Dash, you know what’s we’re in for?” Applejack asked, looking at the floating pegasus curiously. “What do you mean?” Rainbow asked, not looking at them but flying ahead of them. “She means did you see who we’ll be seeing this time,” Rarity said, giving Rainbow a dry look. It was a simple question considering what they’re gonna be doing in a few minutes. “Oh, that. All I can saw is that they have armor and weapons. Kinda hard to explain,” Rainbow said, furrowing her brow. Once they reached the viewing room, they saw Twilight and Spike talking to a familiar stallion. The stallion had a white coat and a blue mane that had a light and dark blue streak in it. His cutie mark was a dark blue sheild with a pink star on his flank. He looked up and waved at the girls who just arrived. “Hi girls,” the stallion said, putting his hoof down. “Your highness/Prince Shining Armor,” the girls said at once. The stallion, Shining Armor, chuckled and said, “Please just call me Shining. We’re all friends here.” He really didn’t want to be treated like a noble at the moment. “Be that as it may, may I be bold to ask why you’re here?” Rarity asked, taking a seat on the couch. “To tell the truth, Twilight sent me a letter a few days ago and here I am,” Shining said, pulling Twilight in for a hug while she hugged him back. The girls were quiet as the memory of the teenage mutant ninja turtles fight was still fresh in their mind. The fact that Twilight was hugging her brother tightly was proof that she still thought of the fight as well. Twilight then separated from her brother and said, “By the way, do you know where Starlight is?” Shining was confused for a moment then said, “Starlight left a day before I got your letter. She didn’t come back yet?” “That’s weird. Where could she be?” Twilight said as her friends were wondering the same thing. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ where in the world is Starlight Glimmer?~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ We find Starlight walking through a dangerous path on the side of a mountain. She tried not to look down as a rickety looking bridge came into view. “Finally! Now i just need to cross the bridge and then it’s a straight line back home!” cheered Starlight as she made her way towards the bridge, but she was stop by a figure jumping in front of her path. “Halt!” screamed the figure. Who was actually an old looking goat with a brown coat, a long shaggy beard, and his right eye. “Stop! Who would cross the Bridge of Death must answer me these questions three, ere the other side he see.” the old goat said as he gave Starlight Crazed look. “And what happens if i get any of them wrong?” questioned Starlight, nervous at the odd Goat. “Then you are cast into the Gorge of Eternal Peril!” yelled the crazed Goat with a mad grin, and to prove his claim a random boulder flew up into the air and landing in the gorge. Starlight hesitated for a mere sec before she gave the mad goat a stern glare. “Very well you old goat! Ask me your questions and I’ll answer them without fail!” she declared. Mutch to the old goat’s delight. “First! What... is your name?” asked the old goat. “Starlight Glimmer,” She said, confused by the easy question. “What... is your quest?” the old goat asked dramatically. “To find my find my way home and be with my friends,” Starlight answered without hesitation, causing the old goat to grin. “What... is the airspeed velocity of an unladen swallow?” the old goat said with an unnerving grin that only grew wider as Starlight looked down with an unsure look on her face. “I don’t know what you mean,” Starlight said, confusing the old goat. “Do you mean An African or European swallow?” she asked. “Huh? I-- I don't know that. YAAAAAAA HOO HOOHOO HOO EE!!!” screamed the goat as he was thrown off the ledge by his own magic, and as Starlight looked down to only see the deep darkness of the casm she could only let out a sigh of relief. “Thank goodness hanging out with fluttershy always has some random animal facts of the day,” said the mare as she made her was across the bridge. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ “She’s probably fine. Now let’s start the episode,” Pinkie said as Twilight pressed play on the remote. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Interlude (*Cues: Invader - Jim Johnston*) Wiz: When the aliens invade a thousand years from now and our hyper-advanced technology isn't enough, our last hope will inevitably be placed in the hands of the lone space marines. “Sounds like use during the monster of the week,” Rainbow Dash joked. Getting some laughs from the group except Shining Armor who was looking at the floor with a frown. “I wish you girls wouldn't even need to deal with those kind of dangers,” he whispered to himself. Boomstick: Like the super soldier, Master Chief ... That caught Shining Armor’s attention as he was interested on mad this guy a “super” soldier. Wiz: ...And Doomguy , the Bane of Hell itself. “He seems scary,” Fluttershy muttered, holding a pillow in front of her like a shield. Boomstick: He's Wiz and I'm Boomstick. Wiz: And it's our job to analyze their weapons, armor, and skills to find out who would win a Death Battle. Master Chief (*Cues: Halo - Brothers In Arms*) Wiz: At the young age of six, John-117 was abducted by the UNSC to be part of the Spartan-ll program. “They abducted children?” Fluttershy yelled, feeling angry that someone out there would do that to a small child. Boomstick: The worst daycare ever. “More like a living Tartarus for those poor kids,” Applejack said with a glare. Wiz: At fourteen, he underwent the program's augmentation procedures, dramatically increasing his strength, speed, vision, intelligence, and reflexes. Boomstick: When he was done, his bones were nearly indestructible and he could beat up and kill way more experienced marines. At fourteen! Man, that's one harsh puberty. “Wow,” Shining said, shocked that an experienced soldier could be beaten by a child how was experimented on. “Wish I could have done that when I was younger.” “Abducted?” Twilight asked confused by her brother’s words. “No, I mean beat up experienced soldiers. Would have made boot camp easier I think,” Shining said, chuckling a bit. Spartan-ll Augmentations 15x Stronger Skeleton Muscle Increase 300% Increased Reflexes Better eyesight & Perception Boosted Tissue Growth Lactase Recovery Decrease Heightened Memory, Intelligence, & Creativity (*Cues: Halo 3 - Last of the Brave*) Wiz: Upon reaching the rank Master Chief Petty Officer, John began a thirty year campaign leading the Spartans against three different threats: The Insurrection, The alien Covenant, and the Flood. As a Spartan, he wears Mark VI Mjolnir armour. This technological marvel links directly to John's brain, so his actions controlled on thought BEFORE movement. Simultaneously, the suit itself multiplies Chief's already enhanced physical capabilities. “Fascinating!” Twilight said as she she pulled out a quill and paper and started so write down the info on screen in a rapid pace. Boomstick: The suit weighs half-a-freakin' ton, yet the guy still jumps around like he's on the moon. “I don’t think even I could move in that,” Applejack said, eyes wide at the weight of the suit. “I think not even Maud could move as fast as she usually does in that,” Pinkie Pie said knowing while her sister could still move in a set of that armor, she would be slowed down considerably. Wiz: The helmet's Heads Up Display includes a motion tracker with an eighty foot radius. Also, the suit projects a recharging energy shield. “Wish we had that in the Royal Guards. Could have made a few missions easier,” Shining said, imagining himself in the armor. Mark VI Mjolnir Armour Brain linked reactive circuits Force Multiplying Circuits Titanium Alloy Plating Heat Resistant Motion Tracker 5 second regenerating energy shields Weight: 1000 lbs Boomstick: The Chief's first sidearm is the M60 Magnum. (*Cues: Leonidas - Halo 2*) Boomstick: This scoped, high powered pistol uses 12.7 millimeter armour piercing rounds with the precision accuracy of over 400 feet. I don't care what kinda armour you're wearin', three headshots from this baby, and you're done. “Jeez that could do some damage to Dragon Scales,” said Spike as he shuddered at the thought of getting shot by the Chief’s handgun. Weaponry Side Arms M6D Magnum Ammo: 12.7 mm Range: 400 ft Scope: 2x Wiz: His other sidearms include the SMG and frag grenades. M7 Submachine Gun Ammo: 5 mm Range: 155 ft M9 Frag Grenade Kill Radius: 16ft “Those grenades could have helped during the changeling invasion,” Shining said, thinking of how much easier it would have been. Boomstick: His standard firearms include the rapid fire Assault Rifle, the more precise Battle Rifle, and the M90 shotgun, a pump action deathdealer that uses Soellkraft 8 gauge shells... Wiz: ....Which are so impossibly dangerous, they are banned world wide to the point of near extinction. “Oh my~ and he has something that dangerous,” Rarity asked. Standard Firearms MA5C Assault Rifle Ammo: 7.62 mm Rate of Fire: 650 RPM BR55HB SR Battle Rifle Ammo: 9.5 mm Range: 3100 ft M90 Shotgun Type: Pump Spread: 15 Pellets Ammo: Soellkraft 8-Gauge Shells Boomstick: But even that's not enough killin' power for the Master Chief. The M41 rocket launcher holds 2 rockets at once and his sniper rile was designed for killin' giant alien infantry from long distances. The shells can pierce tank armour or rip people in half. And then there's Chief's killer app: The Spartan Laser. “That's such a cool name,” gushed Rainbow Dash. “But man he’s carrying enough firepower to take out a group of dragon” muttered Spike in fear of ever being on the chiefs bad side. Wiz: With a three second charge and a 5 shot limit, it does have it's faults. Buuuuut.... Boomstick: Think of it kinda like a laser pointer... that points things INTO OBLIVION! The group laughed at Boomsticks joke. (The Spartan Laser obliterates a hulking alien soldiers and a giant turret.) “Woah,” Shining, Spike, Rainbow and Twilight said quietly. “If the guards had that, we wouldn’t have to worry about any dangerous beasts attacking us,” Rarity said, amazed by the weapon’s firepower. “That’s better than my cannon,” Pinkie said, watching the destruction in awe. Heavy Weaponry M41 Rocket Launcher Ammo: 102 HEAT Charge Rockets Scope: 2x SRS990-S2 AM Sniper Rifle Ammo: 14.5 mm Fin-Stabilized Range: 7545.9 ft Night-Vision Mode M6 Spartan Laser Shot Limit: 5 John-117's Most Powerful Weapon Wiz: Master Chief can only carry two or three weapons at a time. However, he seems to posses extraordinary luck and can usually find exactly the weapon he needs somewhere nearby. Boomstick: He finds weapons on the ground more often than you can find change on a sidewalk. “He’s got some incredible luck,” Rainbow said Wiz: He can also use special equipment in the field. The overshield triples the strength of his armour's shields, and active camouflage will cover him in an aura of light bending energy, creating the illusion of invisibility. “Now that’s something my men could use,” Shining said as he imagined his soldier’s with that kind of gear. Boomstick: Plus the bubble shield is a portable force field that projects the Chief from all projectiles, though people and vehicles can pass right through. How the hell does that work? “Almost sounds like your shield Shiny,” Twilight said getting a nod from her brother. “Ya, but unlike that one mine prevents anything from getting in,” stated Shining Armor. Special Equipment Overshield Active Camouflage Radar Jammer Regenerator Deployable Cover Power Drain Bubble Shield Wiz: But even THAT'S not the last of Master Chief's vast arsenal. When the elites allied themselves with the UNSC during the Human/Covenant War, the two sides traded some of their weaponry, giving John access to plasma pistols, plasma rifles, and the Type-51 carbines. “He even has alien weapons?” Shining asked, feeling a little jealous that the Chief can use other worldly weapons. Sangheili Weaponry Type-25 Plasma Pistol Type-25 Plasma Rifle Type-51 Carbine Boomstick: Not to mention my favourites, the sticky plasma grenade and the lethal energy sword. “Oooh! I wasnt some of those grenades for work!” said an excited Pinkie Pie. “Why would you need those to bake sugarcube?” asked a confused Applejack. “Not for my first job silly but for my new job in the future!” she explained, getting even more confused looks from her friends before they all decided to not questioned it. Type-1 Plasma Grenade Kill Radius: 13 ft Sticks to Targets Wiz: The Type-1 Energy sword is one of the few weapons John has yet to master. It features two, four foot energy blades that can actually block bullets. “The pegasus would use a sword like that easily,” Rainbow said, liking another sword like a lightsaber. “Even unicorns can use them, darling,” Rarity said, knowing anypony could possibly use the sword. Type-1 Energy Sword Length: 4.15 ft Weight: 5.2 lbs Boomstick: Really? Man, that would've been useful in the games. Wiz: The Master Chief has consistently proven to accomplish the impossible. He's an expert in combat strategy, can run 50 miles an hour, has defeated three entirely different armies multiple times, destroyed an entire covenant armada single handedly, and prevented galactic genocide.... TWICE. “He defeated three armies?” Fluttershy asked, feeling small compared to the green armored man. “Destroyed an armada single handedly? He’s a one man army,” Shining said, having a newfound respect for the Chief. Boomstick: And one time he fell from orbit, holding on to nothing but a flimsy piece of metal, landing without a scratch, and was up kickin' alien ass just a few minutes later. Why? Because he can. “So cool~!” Rainbow dash gushed as she found another person to look up to. Background Height: 7'0" [w/ armor] Weight: 1,287 lbs [w/ armor] UNSC Marines SPARTAN-II Defeated 3 Armies Destroyed Halo 04 & The Ark Super Soldier Top Speed: 50+ mph Hood: Master Chief, you mind telling me what you're doing on that ship? Master Chief: Sir, finishing this fight. “Oh my,” Rarity said, feeling a blush form on her face at the rough yet powerful voice. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ The group felt that the Master Chief deserved his title. Even Rainbow Dash said how cool he was while Shining felt the Chief was a true soldier. He wished someday he could protect his family and kingdom like the Chief did for his world. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Doomguy (*Cues: Doom - Main Theme*) Boomstick: The original, ass-kicking, demon-slaying, first person badass, and one of my personal heroes: Doomguy! “Oh dear…” Rarity said worryingly, scared at the thought of someone that Boomstick looks up to. Background Height: 6'2" Weight: 230 lbs. U.S. Space Marine Captain Prefers a Run-&-Gun Strategy Defeated Hell 5 times Top Speed: 57 mph Wiz: After disobeying his commanding officer, and beating him to death, Doomguy's career took a drastic turn when he was sent to the desolate moons of Mars, which so happened to house a magical gateway to the bloody bowels of Hell. “What kind of soldier would kill his commanding officer?” Shining yelled, ready to rant when the box glowed and a crumpled piece of paper was thrown out. Twilight grabbed the paper with her magic and uncrumpled it. Taking a moment to read what’s on the paper, she turned to her brother and said, “It says here that the commanding officer told Doomguy to kill innocent civilians.” That caused Shining to calm down a little bit but was still a little angry at Doomguy, just a tiny bit. Fluttershy was slowly losing her fear for Doomguy when she heard that. Boomstick: Mexico! “I don’t know what that place is but it sounds like it has some really good food,” Pinkie said. Wiz: (slow to respond) No. Boomstick: And when Hell tried to kill everybody, Doomguy killed them back. “How can you kill something that was already dead?” asked Twilight. “Who cares, it’s awesome,” Rainbow said, feeling pumped. Wiz: He wears the Mega armor, a shielding combat suit almost twice as strong as typical security armor and can endure dozens of normally fatal plasma blasts. “Simple but effective.” Shining said. Mega Armor 2x's stronger than regular armor Non-Regenerating Energy Shields Max Armor & Shield Charge is 200% Boomstick: He carries a huge arsenal of murder machines, all at once! “An advantage over the Chief,” Twilight said, knowing the Chief can only carry 2 weapons at a time. Wiz: Using a backpack with experimental warp technology, Doomguy is able to hold all his weapons simultaneously. “Sounds like Pinkie’s Hair,” deadpanned Rarity as she saw said mare Pull out a cupcake and eat it. Boomstick: I'm pretty sure his pistol uses the same technology, since he never has to reload! “It would be useful if i could get some crossbows that didn't need to reload,” pondered Shining Armor. Boomstick: And when things get tight, his chainsaw will rip and tear through anybody! Rgggghhhh! Not the chainsaw! Yes the chainsaw! Rgggghhh! (pause) And his chain gun mows down everything in seconds. While normally they would be disturbed at Boomstick’s murder fantasies, the group couldn't help at his over dramatic acting. (*Cues: The Demons from Adrian's Pen (Orchestral) - Doom*) Wiz: Oddly, the chaingun uses the same .5 mm ammo as the handgun, and is relatively ineffective against strong body armor. “Sounds like it won’t do much damage to the chief's armor,” commented Spike, getting a few nods in Agreement. Sidearms Pistol (Ammo Capacity: 200 Bullets) Chainsaw (A.K.A.: Great Communicator; gas powered) Chain Gun (Ammo: 5mm, rate of fire: 525 rpm, Full-Auto Dispenses Accuracy) Boomstick: Well, that's stupid. Luckily, Doomguy has his trusty pump-action shotgun! It holds sixteen shells and fires seven pellets a shot, with a spread range so ridiculous he doesn't even have to aim! But apparently one overpowered shottie isn't enough! So Doomguy got himself a super shotgun: a heavy double-barreled devastator that fires a huge spread of twenty pellets. Good luck dodging that! “Huh for some reason everytime i hear the word shotgun i get the urge to punch some lazy fella who’s also orange.” said a confused Applejack. Wiz: He also wields a plasma gun and a rapid fire rocket launcher that can hold fifty rockets at once. “Who designs these things and where can I find him?” Shining and Twilight said at the same time. Shining wanted to get the guards outfitted with these things while Twilight wanted to know the inner workings of these weapons. Standard Firearms Shotgun (Pump Action; Spread: 7 Pellets) Super Shotgun (Sawn off and break open, spread: 20 Pellets) Plasma Gun Rocket Launcher (Ammo Capacity: 50 Rockets, Rocket Speed: 40 mph) Boomstick: What the hell! Who designs these things? Wiz: But even that pales in comparison to Doomguy's ultimate weapon. This caught the group's attention especially Twilight and her brother. Boomstick: It's the king of cannons, the doomsday bazooka that lays waste to everything: It's the Big Fucking Gun 9000! (Doomguy launches a giant green ball that explodes when it hits, Killing everything on screen.) Everyone was awed by the destruction on the screen. Wiz: The BFG fires enormous rounds of plasma. Upon impact the resulting detonation releases trace-rays across a wide varying blast radius. This ¨gun¨ is strong enough to annihilate the gargantuan Cyber-Demon in a mere two or three shots, and the unprecedented range of its splash damage ensures no-one is getting away unscathed. BFG 9000 Plasma Blasts Slow-Moving Projectile Huge Blast Radius Can be charged Obliterates everything Boomstick/Twilight/Shining: (moans with pleasure) Wiz: Wait a second Boomstick, you're not going to believe this but the BFG is not Doomguy´s deadliest weapon. “What, more?” Rarity said, unconvinced that Doomguy needs anymore weapons after that last display. Boomstick: Yes! More! “Ya give us more!” the two sibling said. “Those two are acting like foals in a candy store,” Applejack muttered to the others as they snickered to themselves. Wiz: Behold the Unmaker, a portable death ray that puts everything else to shame. Boomstick/the siblings: Gimme! Gimme gimme gimme! Wiz: There's just one catch. The Unmaker's beams are so powerful because they actually feed off the demonic energy of the target, so it's ineffective against anyone who isn't from Hell. “Still worth it for Tartarus,” Shining said bouncing in his seat as Twilight did the same thing. Unmaker Laser Beams Up to 3 simultaneous lasers Paralyzes demons Demon-Tech in origin Feeds on Demonic Auras Deadly only to the Demons of Hell Boomstick: Dammit! Well, I guess it doesn't really matter when you already have a backpack full of things to kill people with. Give me the BFG any day. “Agreed,” said Rainbow Dash. (*Cues: The Imp’s Song - Doom*) Wiz: Now Doomguy isn't exactly a super soldier, but his strength and speed are far greater than a normal man, due to the use of power ups. Boomstick: The Berserker power up completely heals him and increases his strength ten full. And the Invincibility and Partial Invisibility power ups do, well, exactly what you think they would. Power-Ups Berserk Megasphere Radiation Shield Light Amplification Visor Partial Invisibility Invulnerability Wiz: Doomguy rarely relies on strategy, always preferring to mow down his enemies as fast as he can. The two sibling had to frown at, feeling that Doomguy needed to put more thought into his actions. Boomstick: It's more fun that way. Wiz: He's defeated the armies of Hell five separate times. He even walked right knee-deep into Hell itself to avenge his pet rabbit Daisy. “He fought through hell for his bunny?” Fluttershy said, seeing Doomguy in a new light. She felt she would do the same thing if anything happened to Angel Bunny. He can run up to fifty-seven miles an hour, even outrunning his own rockets, and can spot invisible enemies. “This guy’s a killing machine,” gasped out Applejack. Boomstick: He's no normal man. He's Doomguy! The group watches Doomguy punch some kind of cybernetic, demonic brain monster until it collapses and explodes. Wiz: Alright, the combatants are set, let's end this debate once and for all. But first, a message for our sponsors, Squarespace. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ As the trailer played out, everyone was quick to form their team. On team Chief: Twilight, Shining armor, Rarity, and Applejack. And on team Doomguy: Rainbow Dash, Spike, Pinkie Pie, and Fluttershy. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Boomstick: It's time for a Death Battle! Death Battle (*Cues: Blow Me Away - Breaking Benjamin*) Doomguy is seen walking around the stage that has a warthog and a few crates while Doomguy is carrying a shotgun. Suddenly, Master Chief walks into the area with a loaded pistol. “The atmosphere is so intense,” Rarity commented. Sweating from the intense staredown. “Things are about to get load!” Spike cheered. FIGHT! (*Cues: Intermission from Doom - Doom*) Master Chief pulls out an assault rifle and begins unloading on Doomguy, but it is doing no damage. A firefight erupts and Doomguy is rapidly switching through his weapons, shooting each time. Chief takes cover, but it is no use, as Doomguy pulls out his rocket launcher and rapidly shoots rockets at him. “Master chief better get out of their!” Applejack yelled. (*Cues: Halo - Rock Anthem For Saving The World*) Chief over-dramatically dodges them all with somersaults and barrel rolls and grabs one of the soaring rockets. He chucks it back towards Doomguy, stunning him. While stunned, Chief grabs the Warthog and chucks it at Doomguy, revealing an Energy Sword and an invisibility power up. While Doomguy is trying to shoot the Warthog out of the air, Chief switches the assault rifle for the sword and goes invisible. Doomguy finally gets the Warthog downed, but he notices Chief is nowhere to be found. “Did you see that!? He threw that thing at Doomguy!” Rainbow yelled in disbelief. “And his luck really kicked in with the whole finding a weapon and power up,” Twilight added in. (*Cues: Doom - Sign of Evil*) He then pulls out his chaingun, jerks around, and begins to fire, revealing Chief, who is using the sword as a shield to dodge them. Doomguy, seeing how the Chaingun is doing nothing, pulls out the shotgun and blast Chief back into a crate, revealing an invincibility power up. Doomguy gets the power up while Chief uses a rocket launcher and sniper rifle to stop him, but no dice. The invincibly wears off and Doomguy fires his BFG, but out of the explosion is a plasma grenade. It sticks onto Doomguy's shoulder and blows him into bloody chunks. “No!” cried Fluttershy as she saw Doomguy become a gory mess. “There there Fluttershy, it’ll be ok,” Pinkie said soothingly. (*Cues: This is the Hour - Halo 3*) The smoke from the BFG round fades away and reveals an unscathed Master Chief, who used a bubble shield to stop the BFG round. Chief walks over to Doomguy's bloody chunks and teabags them. The group gave a deadpanned look as the chief did the universal gaming sign of fuck you. K.O.! Results Boomstick: It's about time we had a good old-fashioned gunfight! “It was quite flashy i have to agree,” Rarity said. “And loud,” whispered Fluttershy. Still sad about Doomguy’s death. Wizard: Doomguy may have an enormously destructive arsenal, but, unfortunately, his weapons lack versatility. “Sometimes power isn’t enough.” lectured Shining armor. Boomstick: I hate to admit it, but Chief can take and dish out more punishment than Doomguy. “Doomguy is still just a man with a lot of weapons while master Chief was modified to be a super soldier,” Spike Stated. Getting a proud smile from Twilight because of his analyzing skill. Wizard: And while defeating Hell sounds awe-inspiring, Doomguy's enemies weren't that much different from Master Chief's. “Ya they both fought things that were bigger and meaner than a human,” agreed Rainbow Dash. Boomstick: This fight was nuts! (laughs) “HA!” Pinkie Pie laughed as everyone groaned in frustration. Wizard: The winner is the Master Chief. END! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Boomstick: Next time on Death Battle Two mad scientist looking old men appear on screen before the screen goes black. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Turning off the TV, Twilight turns towards her friends as her brother slid off the couch and onto his hooves. “Gotta say, that was fun but I need to go,” Shining said, looking at Twilight. Before she could say anything, a bright light came from the box as Shining looked at it curiously. “Is that the box you told me about?” “Yup, the box gives us some stuff after each episode,” Twilight said, walking over towards the box and opened it. Looking inside, Twilight saw a bunch of toys, shirts and a few sweatbands. There was even a plush toy that had a tag on it. “So what did we get?” Rainbow asked, wanting to see what cool stuff they get this time. “Some toys, shirts and sweatbands. There’s even something in here with Fluttershy’s name on it,” Twilight said, looking confused. “So, what? Like a blanket or something?” Rainbow said, feeling a bit curious. “No, I mean it literally has her name on it. A tag I mean,” Twilight said, levitating a plush toy of Doomguy towards Fluttershy. Fluttershy looked at the plush curiously before taking it into her hooves. She quietly said, “Yay,” as she gives the plush a hug which then plays the Doomguy’s theme song. The others split the stuff as Shining and Spike get a few figures and a Doom shirt in their sizes. Rainbow gets a Master Cheif shirt made for pegasus and some sweatbands that say “Rip and Tear” on them. Applejack got a mini replica of Doomguy’s Shotgun and Rarity had a statue of Master Chief in an epic pose. Everypony else got toys and shirts in their sizes. “Well I need to go. Have to get back and see Cadance and Flurry Heart,” Shining said while giving Twilight a hug. He walks towards the door giving the girls a wave goodbye. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ As Shining Armor sat down in his seat in the royal crystal train, he couldn't help but think about the show he had just watched with his baby sister and her friends. ‘To think there are such powerful soldiers out there fighting in grand battles that makes the changeling invasion look like a schoolyard fight between kids,’ thought Shining Armor feeling like he was completely outmatched by some real soldiers. 'But' he thought, pulling out his journal and a quill, HE started to draw out some designs for new sets of armor that were based off the Chief’s. 'Doesn't mean I can’t learn from this,’ he thought as he continued working on his designs. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ CHAPTER END! NEXT TIME, EGGMAN VS DR. WILEY. Eggman VS Wily.As the girls put away their new gifts from the magic box they all gathered around the tv for the finale episode for the day. Interlude (*Cues: Invader - Jim Johnston*) Boomstick: It's no secret that scientists are, well, crazy as hell. But these two take it way too far! “So it’s a battle of the eggheads?” Rainbow Dash teasingly asked getting a pout from Twilight. Wiz: Dr. Ivo Robotnik, aka the Eggman... “That’s ...a strange name,” Twilight said, confused. “Wait isn’t that the guy who wants to beat sonic?” Applejack asked.. “What!?” yelled Rainbow dash before glaring at the screen. Boomstick: ...and Dr. Albert Wily, aka Einstein without rogaine. “Another strange title,” Fluttershy said, clutching her Doomguy plushie. “We’ll need wait and see how this goes, darling,” Rarity said, giggling at her friend’s little position. Wiz: In this scenario, both Doctors will be leading their mechanized armies to see who is the deadliest robot commander. “(Gasp!) ROBOT WARS!!!” screamed an excited Pinkie Pie. Boomstick: He's Wiz and I'm Boomstick. Wiz: And it's our job to analyze their weapons, armor and skills to find out who would win a Death Battle. Dr. Eggman (*Cues: Dr Eggman's Theme - Sonic SatAM*) Wiz: Dr. Eggman is the obese, yet strangely athletic, evil mastermind responsible for terrorizing the world of Sonic the Hedgehog, in his quest to rule a global empire. His engineering mastery has led to a massive army of unique robot warriors using the strangest fuel source, kidnapped animals. “WHAT!?” screamed mostly everyone in the group before they turned a worried flance towards Fluttershy, whose mane was covering her face as she held her Doomguy Plushie with a tighter grip. “That…” whispered Fluttershy. “Uh… you okay there sugarcube,” asked a worried Applejack. “That… that…” whispered Fluttershy a little bit louder. “Ummm. Fluttershy?” Pinkie asked getting a little bit scared now. “That… THAT NO GOOD SON OF A-!!!” screamed an enraged Fluttershy as she went on a tirade of cursing that left the rest of the group stunned speechless, even the two chaos gods that were watching them were surprised by the outburst from the gentle mare. Boomstick: He's PETA's worst nightmare! Background Real Name: Ivo Robotnik Height: 6'1" Weight: 282 lbs. I.Q.: Over 300 Phd: Unknown & Probably Fake Ruler of the Eggman Empire Endorses Animal Cruelty Wiz: His army is based around speed and defense, including Moto Bugs, Caterkillers, Buzz Bombers, Egg Pawns and SWATbots. Robot Infantry Motobug High Speed Scouts Caterkiller Covered in defensive fights Buzz Bomber Quick Flyers with Laser Guns E-1001 Egg Pawn Impressive arsenal, but dumb SWATbot Well-Rounded, but fragile Rarity had to suppress a shudder at the insect based machines. “(giggle) they look funny!” laughed Pinkie Pie. Boomstick: But Eggman's got way more than that! His Egg Fleet is a huge armada of Battleships, led by the Massive Egg Carrier, which supports a huge front mounted laser cannon. Everyone was amazed at the ships. “With those ships, he could beat Ember’s army easily,” Spike said, eyes wide in amazement and fear. Egg Fleet Composed of Hundreds of Flying Warships Mako Shark Gunship Sawfish Battleship Manta Ray Ship Egg Carrier Length: 2588 ft. Numerous Missile Launchers Front-Mounted Laser Cannon (*Cues: Sonic 3 and Kunckles - Robonik Orchestral remix*) Wiz: The Eggman army is spearheaded by his deadliest robot warriors, the Badniks. The EggRobo is a smartbot crafted in Eggman's own image and designed to carry out tasks Eggman himself would normally do. Badniks EggRobo Designed for Tactical tasks Can Pilot vehicles “Pretty clever building a machine to cut half the work for you,” Twilight said Boomstick: What's this guy's deal with eggs? “That’s a good question. What is his deal with eggs?” Applejack asked, wanting to know the answer. Wiz: On its own, Silver Sonic appears slow and bulky but it is powered by a Chaos Emerald, making it a much faster and more practical machine. Silver Sonic Can fly with Rocket Shoes Powered by a Chaos Emerald “Silver Sonic?” Rainbow said in disappointment. Fluttershy knowing how Rainbow Dash talks and is, quietly said, “Uh oh.” Boomstick: Then he made another robo-hog, Mecha Sonic, who focuses on firepower over speed! Wiz: Mecha Sonic can even absorb Chaos energy to attain a short lived Super Form. “That’s pretty impressive,” Rarity said. Rainbow Dash just grunts while glaring at the Sonic imitation. Mecha Sonic Slower and tougher than Silver Greater Focus on Firepower Can Absorb and Use Chaos Energy Boomstick: But Eggman wanted more than just Sonic bots. Mecha Knuckles can glide and vomit giant rockets... Mecha Knuckles Fires Large Rockets “Knuckles? That name sounds Nice,” commented Applejack. Wondering why that name struck a chord with her. “Why would anyone want to make a robot that vomits rockets?” Rarity said, disgusted at the imagery those words brought. Wiz: And E-101 Beta remains one of Eggman's most versatile machines. “How so?” everyone wondered. Boomstick: He's a flying robot with Super Speed, teleportation and a reflector shield! He shoots homing missiles and Kamehameha's and has one of my favorite defensive abilities ever, the backhand! “That’s pretty versatile for a robot,” Twilight said, writing down a few notes. E-101 Beta Mk. II Can fly and teleport Homing missiles Wide RoE laser beams Wiz: The Shadow Androids are fast and durable and typically fight in groups of three. However, their design is so complex, they sometimes glitch in close combat. And speaking of glitches, despite being an absolute genius, Dr. Eggman appears to suffer from a peculiar personality disorder that sent him through several different "phases". Shadow Android Has Shadow's Physical abilities Fires small rockets “Now he’s ripping off Shadow!” ranted Spike, getting nods from everyone. Boomstick: Let's just hope that Scratch and Grounder phase doesn't show up today. Scratch and Grounder “Wow, they look useless,” Pinkie said, a little disappointed at them. Wiz: But none of Eggman's creations have ever been as deadly or as successful as his ultimate killing machine... Boomstick: Hyper Metal Sonic ! “WHAT?” Rainbow yelled, flying a bit higher as she glared at the robotic monstrosity. “Uh-oh…” everyone else muttered. (*Cues: Final Boss Theme - Sonic CD*) Wiz: Metal Sonic was specifically designed to be better than Sonic the Hedgehog in every way and was a complete success. Metal can move much faster than Sonic, easily reaching near mach 5 speeds. Metal's abilities include Sonic's spin dash and homing attack, along with the impenetrable Black Shield. “There’s no why this hunk junk is better then Sonic!” yelled Rainbow Dash. “Ya gettin a little bit angry there for your boyfriend Dash?” smirked Applejack, getting a few laughs from the rest of the group but Rainbow Dash just ignores them and keeps her attention on the screen. Boomstick: He's also got a chest laser, rocket powered flight and the Maximum overdrive attack, where he overloads his circuits to create a glowy energy field that'll burn through pretty much anything! “That’s more deadly than dragon fire,” muttered a nervous spike. (*Cues: Sonic 3 - Final Boss Orchestral Remix*) Wiz: And that's not all. Somehow, Eggman managed to make Metal Sonic an ever evolving force. Metal has the uncanny ability to scan and copy data from others, flawlessly replicating their abilities. “That might be a problem,” Pinkie said, munching on some popcorn. Boomstick: Damn, Eggman sure stepped up his game! “I'll say!” gasped Twilight. Wiz: Obtaining enough power can transform Metal into a number of more impressive forms, all of which increase his abilities immeasurably. “Yet this loser still lost to the original,” grinned Rainbow Dash. “Because Sonic never gives up!” cheered Pinkie Pie and Spike as all three of them cheered. Boomstick: The only downside to giving Metal Sonic a super brain is Eggman sometimes has trouble keeping him in line. “That’s dangerous to give a robot the ability to think for itself,” Twilight said, thinking Eggman isn’t that bright. “At least you won’t try and make some kind of robot, egghead,” Rainbow said teasingly. Metal Sonic Top Speed: Mach 5 255 cc 4 Valve Fusion Engine Max Output - 55 ps/600 rpm Max Torque - 7.54 kg-m/4000 rpm Weaponry Sonic's abilities Black Shield Chest Laser Maximum Overdrive Scan and Copy Ability Wiz: But even with his metallic minions waging his war, Dr. Eggman is perfectly willing to step into the battlefield himself. He pilots the Eggmobile, a fast single man pod with twin mounted Machine Guns. The Eggmobile's most vital function, however, is its universal compatibility to operate almost all of Eggman's machines. “That’s pretty clever to make something like that,” admitted Twilight as she was writing all this down. “Now darling, don’t go and make an evil army on us,” teased Rarity. Getting an eye roll from her alicorn friend. Boomstick: Like the humongous Death Egg Robot with its spiked rocket arms and lasers! Egg Mobile A.K.A. 'Eggo-Matic' Universal Compatibility Attachable Wrecking Ball 2 Machine Guns Mounts "Death Egg Robot" Flight Rocket Arms Laser Cannon Wiz: Eggman is vicious and clever. He's an expert at playing his opponent's right into his hands. At the same time, though, he can be overly obsessive to the point of overlooking some important factors in an effort to concentrate on a single goal. But while this can be a perilous game for Eggman, it also makes him dangerously unpredictable. “Kind of reminds me of Starlight back when she was evil,” commented Spike. Still wondering how she thought messing with the past of the bearers of the elements of harmony wouldn’t have disastrous results. Eggman: A nice dream. But dreams are meant to be... He uses his rocket boots to fly out of the hole as Antoine runs in fear. Eggman: ...BROKEN! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ After Eggman’s segment was over the girls agreed while he did have some powerful machines but single mindedness and lack of forethought made him more likely lose. That and Fluttershy was still glaring daggers at the screen. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Dr. Wily (*Cues: Unknown Theme*) Wiz: After being continuously out-shined by his insensitive colleague, Dr. Light, Dr. Albert W. Wily turned to a life of crime in an attempt to achieve fame and power. The group felt bad about the old man constantly being out shine and the jealousy that comes from it can eat away at a pony. Background Full Name: Dr. Albert W. Wily Age: 57 Ex-Professor of the Robot University of Technology PhD: Electronics Engineering Knows Ninjitsu Boomstick: How did he plan to get so famous, you ask? By taking over the world! “OF COURSE!!!” yelled Pinkie Pie while wearing a red peaked cap with a gold skull with wings pin on it. Wiz: Whether through his own engineering or impressive hacking, over the years, Wily developed a large, diverse robot army built on the ideals of both solid defense and ranged firepower. Mets, Sniper Joes and Bladers make up the bulk... Boomstick: With Hotheads and Elephants, oh my! “Those do seem like more rounded foot soldier,” said Twilight. “Not only are they stronger but they have weapons to counter their weaknesses,” she continued. “Better than Eggman’s,” Fluttershy said bitterly, liking the fact that Dr Wily at least doesn’t use poor innocent animals as part the robots. Robot Infantry Met Defensive Hard Hats Sniper Joe Defensive shield Blader Flying Recon Robot Hothead Throws Fire, but Cannot Move Paozo Vacuum Powered Action Wiz: Wily is a mastermind in more than just hardware. His Roboenza virus is a deadly disease for robots, making them unstable and violent with no regard for human life. The group had to shudder at such a weapon that could turn even the most docile of machines into killing machines. Roboenza Virus Created by Wily Only Affects Robots Makes Robots Violent & Unreasonable Precursor for Wily's Maverick Virus Boomstick: But Wily's weirdest bot is definitely the Yellow Devil, a giant pulsating yellow blob thing that pulls itself apart and uses its own body as a weapon. “That robot seems to be quite versatile and dangerous,” Rarity said, feeling that it would be a challenge to beat this thing. “And a constant source of rage for gamers,” Pinkie said, her friends look at her weirdly. Yellow Devil Height: Approx 20 ft Can Shapeshift Dismantles and Uses Own Body as a Weapon Immune to Cold Weak to Fire & Electricity Near-Indestructible Body, but the Eye is Vulnerable (*Cues: Guts Man Theme (Techno Remix)*) Wiz: Wily's army is led by his Robot Masters. Guts Man was a civil engineering machine remade as a powerhouse who can lift over two tons. “Guess he would have to be strong if he was made for construction,” Twilight said, secretly writing down some more notes. “(whistle) wish i had that fella working at the farm,” said Applejack, thinking about how both Big Mac and Gutsman could get the harder jobs done in no time. Robot Masters Guts Man Super Arm; Lifts Over 2 Tons Immune to cold Boomstick: Metal Man was made specifically for killing things. You can tell 'cause he's got evil red eyes! “Eeeep!” squeaked Fluttershy as she hid behind her Doomguy plushie. Metal Man Metal Blade; 8-Directional Death Designed for combat Weak to his own weapon Wiz: He wields ceramic titanium Metal Blades, one of the deadliest weapons in video game history, and is made of lightweight material, making him quick-footed. “But is he faster than me,” Rainbow said, challenging the robot. “No but 10 bits say he makes you into confetti!” Pinkie Pie said with a cheerful Smile scaring the rest of the group. Boomstick: Slash Man is fast and agile and wields the Slash Claw, a portable alien blade that's designed to destroy asteroids! (pause) OK. “How and why!” asked a confused Twilight who was wondering why someone make something like that. Slash Man Slash Claw; Destroys Asteroids Red Adhesive; Traps enemies Wiz: Magnet Man is a tactical fighter who uses homing Magnet Missiles and the Magnet shield to outmaneuver enemies. And then there's Sheep Man. Originally designed to actually herd sheep, he was reprogrammed by Wily to turn into clouds, get bored easily and fall apart when hit by rubber baseballs. “Magnet Man’s missiles could be used to disarm any enemy,” Rarity said, seeing those missiles as a useful projectile for the guards. Boomstick/Rainbow Dash: What the fu- Magnet Man Magnet Missile; Homing Sheep Man Originally designed to herd sheep; Electric powers Wiz: Napalm Man is a walking weapon. Boomstick: And a robot Master after my own heart. He likes blowing shit up so much, that he built his own weapons museum, and then blew it up! “Yay! Explosions!” cheered Pinkie Pie. “Pinkies scaring me,” Spike said to an equally nervous Twilight. Napalm Man Napalm Bomb; A Bouncing Bomb Missiles: Numerous types Wiz: Pharaoh Man possesses a large arsenal of mysterious powers including fireballs, energy waves, teleportation, a magic shield and levitation. “A robot using magic?” questioned Twilight confused on how it could do that. Boomstick: And he's also known for being a little punch-happy! (Pharaoh man punches MegaMan, showing while MegaMan Might now have his powers he still doesn't have any of his fucks.) “HA!” laughed Rainbow Dash. Pharaoh Man Pharaoh Shot; Controls Fire Energy Levitation Eye Shield Wiz: But Dr. Wily's Ultimate Robot Master is none other than Bass, “Cool name,” admitted Rainbow Dash. (*Cues: Megaman 7 - Bass Theme (Remix)*) Wiz: a direct Imitation of his Nemesis, Mega Man. Boomstick: He even has a robo-dog helper called Treble. “Aww,” Fluttershy said, thinking he’s not so bad. Wiz: Bass is powered by Bassnium, an extremely potent and unique energy source. Boomstick: Bassnium? You just made that up. Wiz: I wish I did. “Hey if it works it doesn’t matter what it’s called,” Applejack said. Boomstick: Well, he wields the Bass Buster, an arm cannon that has both rapid fire and Charge shot settings. Wiz: He is programmed to be able to copy any action he has seen. If he gets a hold of another's weapon, he can use it to the same effectiveness as the original owner. “That’s deadly!” gasped Twilight. Thinking of a machine that could pick up any weapon and wield them like a master. Boomstick: He can also fuse with Treble using the Super adapter creating... Super Bass! This made everyone look at Bass in awe as they thought of fusing with their own pets. The thought brought some giggles as they agreed tit was a silly idea. Wiz: Bass is extremely powerful but fairly brash and arrogant. He seeks to prove he is the strongest robot warrior there is and will even disobey Dr. Wily's orders if he thinks they impede his goal. Though he will not kill his creator, he has occasionally attacked him. “So just like Metal Sonic,” Spike asked “At least he won’t kill his creator,” Fluttershy said, still not liking he would hurt Dr Wily. Bass Bass Buster Charge Shot Rapid Fire Jet Booster Powered by Bassnium Super Adapter Copy Ability (*Cues: Wily Machine (Arranged) - Mega Man 9*) Boomstick: That's when Wily busts out his personal fighting vehicle! Wiz: The Wily Machine has gone through several variations... Boomstick: ...Even a dinosaur! “COOOL!” cheered Spike along with Pinkie Pie and Rainbow Dash. Wiz: Though Wily's favorite appears to be machine #8. Boomstick: Good old 8 can fly, launch missiles and has a triple barrel laser cannon and a Boomerang Buzzsaw. “That truly is a vehicle of death right their,” shuddered Rarity, imagining that thing flying over ponyville. Wily Machine 8 Houses Wily Capsule Rocket-Powered Flight Missile Launcher Boomerang Buzzsaw Tri-Barrel Laser Blaster Large Laser Cannon Within Skull Wiz: It also houses Wily's personal transportation, the Wily Capsule. Boomstick: Which makes the worst sound you've ever heard in your life! (cue Wily Capsule sound) Boomstick: Make it stop! MAKE IT STOP! (groan) Surprisingly, everyone agreed with Boomstick, even Rarity. “Oh sweet celestia make it stop!!” cried Rarity, as everyone was covering their ears. Wiz: Wily designs and commands his robots with long term strategy in mind and, as a result, often keeps his team as flexible as possible, though this means each robot has specific exploitable weaknesses. As a unit, Wily's team is prepared for anything. “That’s what you need in an army, solders that can work together and cover the other's weakness,” lectured Twilight. “Learn about that for your Robot army?” teased Rainbow Dash getting some laughter from the group. Twilight rolled her eyes as she smiled at her friends. Dr. Wily: I will create Chaos, destroy everything, and the best part, ooh, the very best part is... He prepares to activate his laser. Dr. Wily: ...I have finally gotten the best of Dr. Light! *laughs maniacally* Wiz: Alright the combatants are set, let's end this debate once and for all. Boomstick: But first, we got an advertisement from… uh... Wiz: Actually, Boomstick, we don't need to do those anymore. Boomstick/everyone: Really? Wiz: Absolutely. Boomstick: Freedom! It's time for an addless Death Battlllllllleeeeeeexceptforthebeginningunlessyouradvantagewhichreallyhelpsussupportthisshowsowecanmakemorethingsfighteachothertothedeaththankyouweloveyou! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ They girls quickly decided not to choose side.Though Fluttershy was hoping that eggman lost. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Death Battle (*Cues: Sonic 3 - Final Boss Orchestral Remix*) The armies of Both Dr. Eggman and Dr. Wily confront each other, with Dr. Eggman and Dr. Wily leading in their Eggmobile and Wily UFO respectively. “Robot war!” cheered everyone. FIGHT! (*Cues: Last Battle - Hard Destruction Mix*) Eggman: Attack!!! For the Eggman Empire! Wily: Fool! My firepower is superior! Attack! “To war!!” yelled Spike and Dash, as Pinkie blew on a war horn. Applejack winced at the horn. Three Buzz Bombers fire at four Mets but thanks to their protective hard hats, the Mets are protected and destroy the Buzz Bombers. Three Moto Bugs charge at a Paozo, but get bowled over by a ball thrown by the Paozo. Two Sniper Joes jump over the Paozo and begin to destroy a group of Egg Pawns until only two of them are left standing. Three SWATbots appear to aid the Egg Pawns but they cannot get through the Sniper Joes' shields. Instead, the Sniper Joes return fire and destroy the Egg Pawns and SWATbots. “Eggman’s foot soldiers are getting destroyed,” commented Rarity. “Good…” whispered Fluttershy as she glared at the robots that used poor animals as fuel. Wily: Haha! Your minions are outmatched! “Don’t brag just yet buster,” warned Applejack. Feeling like Wily just jinx himself with that little boast. Eggman: No matter. Get a load of this! E-101 Beta appears. Beta: Target confirmed. The group shudders at the intimidating robot. (*Cues: Crazy Robo ...Boss: E-101R - Sonic Adventure*) Beta flies over Wily's ground forces and destroys most of them with his lasers. He then backhands some Slicers into each other and swats the last one into the Camera. Four Mets are destroyed by a bomb dropped by the EggRobo. A trio of Shadow Androids dash past a duo of Hotheads, who begin lobbing lava rocks at them. Silver Sonic and Mecha Sonic show up and use their spindash moves to destroy the Hotheads. “And Eggman has sict his trump cards at Wily,” Pinkie Pie Said. “And man are they making short work on Wily’s bots!” added Rainbow Dash with a grin. “But that just means Wily’s just going to send his robot master now,” stated Twilight as she put her full focus onto the screen. (*Cues: We're the Robots - Mega Man 9*) Wily: Robot Masters! Go!!! “See!” Twilight said smugly. Getting a few eye rolls from her friends. Napalm Man, Metal Man, Slash Man, Guts Man and Pharaoh Man appear and begin to destroy Eggman's forces. Metal Man and Slash Man team up and fight back-to-back to destroy an Egg Pawn, three Buzzbombers, a Caterkiller and a Moto Bug. Magnet Man uses his powers to pull in Beta and the EggRobo before destroying them with his Magnet missiles. Mecha Sonic battles Pharaoh Man but Pharaoh Man's teleportation skills and Eye Shield successfully defend against him. Pharaoh Man then destroys Mecha Sonic with a yellow blast. Guts Man destroys Mecha Knuckles by throwing a Moto Bug at him. “It’s pure chaos out there,” said Applejack as she marveled at the wanted destruction and random explosions. “Ya… isn’t it beautiful?” asked Pinkie Pie as she at some more popcorn while wearing some 3-D glasses. Meanwhile, Napalm Man is chasing Silver Sonic whilst firing Missiles at him, but is hit by a blast which was fired by Metal Sonic, who is using his Black Shield. “It’s him…” muttered Rainbow Dash as she glared at Sonic’s copy. (*Cues: Sonic 3 - Final Boss Remake Orchestrated / Rock*) The group shuddered at the spine chilling music that started playing which caused Fluttershy to hug her plushie even harder. After deactivating his shield, Metal Sonic scans Napalm Man, claiming his abilities, then destroys Napalm Man's body, before flying over Sheep Man, (*Cues: Dr. Eggman's Theme - Adventures of Sonic the Hedgehog*) “This guy…” muttered Rarity with a blank stare. who is surrounded from both sides by Scratch and Grounder. “Those morons,” Applejack deadpanned. Scratch: Ba ha ha ha! Both Scratch and Grounder collide with Sheep Man, forming a dust cloud. Scratch: Watch out! I got him! Grounder: No, I got him! As the dust clears, Sheep Man is missing. "where'd he go?" spiked asked. Grounder: I thought you had him! Scratch: I thought YOU had him! “Idiots!” the two mares said at the same time as they both face hoofed. “Even I find them annoying.” deadpanned Pinkie. Sheep Man attacks the pair using lightning which knocks their heads off. As he descends to the floor, Grounder's head lands on Scratch's body and Scratch's head lands on Grounder's body. Suddenly, Silver Sonic destroys Scratch, Grounder and Sheep Man. “Good riddance.” everyone muttered. (*Cues: Stardust Speedway (Bad Future) - Sonic CD*) Silver Sonic then got destroyed by Bass, dropping the Green Chaos Emerald. Treble also stands at Bass' side. “Awww doggie!” cooed Fluttershy (*Cues: Magician's theme - The House of the Dead*) Bass: Oh yeah. I'm a badass. “Meh you're pretty cool I’ll give you that.” Rainbow said cheekily. “But he’s no Sonic huh?” grinned Applejack. Getting a glare from the blue mare. “SHUT! IT!” growled out Dash through gritted teeth. Wily: About time you showed up, Bass! The two of them notice the Chaos Emerald lying on the ground. “Uh-oh,” everyone said as they knew what kind of trouble that little gem can do. Wily: Wait. What's that Green thing? "Your downfall if you don’t do something,” said Rarity. Metal Sonic takes the Chaos Emerald and begins to transform into Neo Metal Sonic. “Too late,” said Spike with a worried look. Wily: Well... Good luck, Bass! “I can’t really blame him” Twilight said Wily proceeds to fly off. Bass: Finally! A worthy challenge! Several yellow blobs fly past Bass in Metal Sonic's direction. Bass/everyone: ?!? The blobs fly past Metal Sonic, who is still transforming, and form into the Yellow Devil. After Metal Sonic completes his transformation, the Yellow Devil entraps him with his hand. Eggman then flies in with the wrecking ball attached to the Eggmobile and attacks the Yellow Devil. Eggman: No! Get back, blob thing! “Go back at giving mega man players panic attacks when they hear your theme!” yelled out Pinkie Pie. Bass jumps over and shoots the chain supporting the wrecking ball. Eggman flies away as a Shadow Android attacks Bass with a homing attack, but Bass retaliates by shooting it while it is in the air. “I have to give Bazz some credit there that was a sweet move there.” admitted Rainbow Dash. Eggman: This is a disaster. Call in the Egg Fleet! Wily: Not so fast, Fatso! (*Cues: Boss Battle: Death Egg Robot - Sonic Generations*) Wily is inside his Wily Machine 8. Eggman laughs as he lowers his Eggmobile into his Death Egg Robot, then closes the top of it. The Wily Machine fires 5 blasts at the Death Egg Robo, who hits the Wily Machine with its spiked fists, only for it to fire two missiles at it. Meanwhile, Neo Metal Sonic escapes the Yellow Devil's clutches and takes out Guts Man and Slash Man. The Yellow Devil is knocked back by Metal Sonic then destroyed by two bombs. Bass runs in. “Man look at that fella go!” yelled a surprised Applejack as everyone sees Metal Sonic wipe the floor with the robot masters. Bass: Dr. Wily! Look out! Metal Sonic attacks the Wily Machine until it explodes. Wily flies out and lands in front of the Death Egg Robo. Wily: Wait! I admit defeat! Please spare me! “Not happening,” Twilight said. Knowing a villain like Eggman wouldn't Spare someone. The Death Egg Robot steps on Wily. Most of the group had to wince at eggman's lack of hesitation in killing his enemies. “See?” Twilight said with a flat tone. Eggman: Ho ho ho! Sucker!!! The Death Egg Robot steps backward and sees that it is a fake Wily. Eggman: What? It's a Dummy! Wily: Look who's talking. “(snort) ok I have to admit that’s pretty funny,” laughed Rarity of all ponies. (*Cues: Wily Machine Remix - Mega Man 9*) Eggman turns his robot around and sees Wily Machine 9. Treble walks forward, only to get knocked backwards by Metal Sonic and into Bass. Metal Man throws four Saw Blades at Metal Sonic, who uses his Black Shield to absorb them and send three of them to destroy Metal Man. Bass tries to shoot Metal Sonic from behind but Metal Sonic teleports behind him and attacks him. “Thouse two are really going at it!” cheered Spike as he took some offered popcorn Pinkie Pie Wily: Dumb robots! Why do I always have to do everything myself? Wily opens up his machine's mouth, which then launches a capsule of Roboenza at Metal Sonic, which shatters, unleashing a purple haze. “Did he just use the stuff that makes a robot into a killing machine?” asked a scared Fluttershy. “Yes. yes he did,” deadpanned Rarity as she was wondering what was going on in Wily’s mind. Wily: Ha! That's Roboenza! Looks like I win! Eggman: Not yet! Behold the almighty Egg Fleet! Up above Eggman and Wily, the Egg Fleet is in the sky, which consists of Mako Shark minor ships, Sawfish Battleships and the Egg Carrier. Eggman: Now it's over! I've won! As Eggman laughs, the Roboenza virus begins to take its effect over Metal Sonic, whose eyes glow bright red. Metal Sonic: Kneel before your master! “Ok… that’s scary,” Rainbow Dash said as a shudder goes down her spine. (*Cues: Born Again - Mega Man 9*) Metal Sonic proceeds to flies upward towards the Egg Fleet and begins to absorb them, beginning to transform. Eggman: Metal!!! What are you doing?!? “He’s gone berserk!” yelled a panicked Twilight. Bass: Oh no... Come on, Treble! Bass jumps into the air and uses the Super adapter to become Super Bass. As Metal Sonic's transformation nears its end, Bass shoots at him a few times, only to get blasted out of the sky by Metal Sonic's missiles. Metal Sonic completes his transformation into the Metal Overlord and destroys Bass with a laser, along with a Shadow Android, a Buzz Bomber and Pharaoh Man. He then goes on to destroy Dr. Eggman and his Death Egg Robot. Wily escapes Wily Machine 9 before it is destroyed by Metal Sonic. However, he is not quick enough to avoid Metal Sonic's onslaught of lasers and is eventually destroyed, then the screen goes White. Everyone could only stared wide eyed at the complete destruction of the city. K.O.! Results (*Cues: Boss Battle: Perfect Chaos Pt. 2 "Perfect Chaos REVIVAL!" - Sonic Generations*) Boomstick: Well, that world's fucked. Our bad. “You don’t say?” deadpanned Applejack. Wiz: So... I suppose technically Wily won because he used the Roboenza, which ultimately meant the end for Eggman. “Well he’s not wrong,” Twilight said, scratching her chin. Boomstick: But... then he died too... and that's technically Eggman's robot, soo… “Yeah, can’t be his win if he’s dead,” Rainbow said, trying to figure out the outcome of the battle. Wiz: Then the winner is... uh... Boomstick: Metal Sonic? Wiz: Metal Sonic. “Uh, I guess so?” Applejack asked unsure of what to say while looking at the others.Her friends just shrugged at that. “Metal Wins!” yelled Pinkie Pie as she threw confetti in the air. END! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ After the battle, the girls walked over to the glowing box to see what they got this time. As Twilight opened the box, there were comics inside as she grabbed them with her magic. “So more comic, Twi?” Applejack asked, getting a few for Applebloom. “Yeah, but at least we get some interesting stuff,” Twilight said, taking a few of both Sonic and Megan Man comics. “Yeah and it’s cool to have comic no one else would have,” Rainbow said, putting a bunch of Sonic comics in her saddlebag. “I’m sure you like those comics for another reason,” Rarity sang, giving Rainbow a sly look. This caused Rainbow to blush then fly out of the castle faster than Pinkie catching a promise breaker. Everyone laughed as Fluttershy said, “Well this was fun but I need to go back home. Angel Bunny must be hungry.” She flew towards the door while the Doomguy plushie was on her back like a tiny jockey. “I need to get back and take care of a few chores,” Applejack said, waving goodbye while walking out the door. Soon all her friends said their goodbyes and left the castle as Spike and Twilight were the only ones left. Spike got off the couch and asked, “So did this episode give you any new ideas for your project?” “I got a few ideas with this episode and these comic just might help as well,” Twilight said, walking over towards a bookcase and pulling a book out of the self. The book slowly returns to its original position as the bookcase began to swing open revealing a dimly lit stairway. Twilight walked down the stairs as Spike followed and reached some kind of Lab. In the center was a table with a white sheet covering something.as Twilight walked towards the table. “You still have a problem with it?” Spike asked, staying near the door. “Yes and I’m hoping that with everything we saw, I can fix the problem it’s having,” Twilight said, moving the white sheet to show a robot face with a small visor were its eyes should be and a rainbow wig. Flicking a switch, the robot seemed to come to life and said, “Crush, Destroy, Kill, Swag.” Flicking the same switch, the robot powered down as Twilight said, “Wish I knew why It said that.” ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ CHAPTER END! NEXT TIME ZELDA VS PEACH! Zelda VS PeachThe door to Twilight’s castle opened as her five friends walked in. Once they were inside, they made their way to the viewing room to be greeted by Twilight and Spike already there. “Howdy, Twi, Spike,” Applejack said as the others voiced their own hellos. Spike waved at them as Twilight grumble a half hearted hello. “Are you alright, darling?” Rarity asked, concerned for her friend. “Just didn’t sleep last night,” Twilight said, yawning a bit. “What had a lot on your mind silly filly?” Pinkie asked, bouncing over to the couch and taking a seat. Twilight didn’t say anything as she thought about last night. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ “Crush, kill, destroy, sw-w-ag,” the robot said, stuttering a bit. “WHY CAN’T I FIX YOU?” Twilight yelled, hitting her robot with a wrench in frustration. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ “You can say that. But how about you get us some snack and we can watch the next episode,” Twilight said, feeling herself wake up a bit. “That sounds like a grad idea, Twiley,” a familiar cheerful voice said from the doorway. Everyone turned to see Princess Cadance. “Cadance,” Twilight said, rushing over to her sister-in-law. “Sunshine, sunshine, ladybugs awake, clap your hooves and give a little shake,” the two said while doing their little dance. After the dance, they hugged each other as Twilight’s friends just watched. Once they separated from the hug, Twilight said, “What’re you doing here, Cadance?” “Well, I needed so time away from Flurry Heart and decided to visit,” Cadance said, following Twilight into the room. “Really?” Twilight asked, excited to have Cadance over. “Yes and Shining told me about the show. So I figured I could see you and this show that Shining liked,” Cadance said, taking a seat. “Oh, before I start the episode, do you know what happened to Starlight?” Twilight said, feeling a bit worried for her friend. “I’m sorry Twilight But the train she was on crashed in the middle of a tundra. I had my guards searching the wreckage and they told me that they found no body,” Cadance said, trying to calm down her sister-in-law. “Where could she be?” Twilight asked herself. “I wouldn’t worry Twilight. If Starlight can hold her own against you, then she can handle walking to the next town,” Spike said, grabbing a cup. “You sure Spike? Starlight might be hurt,” Twilight said, panicking a little bit. “Relax, Twilight I’m sure she’s fine,” Spike said. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ where in the world is Starlight Glimmer?~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "I AM NOT OK!" screamed Starlight as she fired another magic bolt at another living pony skeleton as a horde shuffled over towards her. "All trespassers shall be punished in the name of our mistress nightmare moon!" hissed out one of the lich's in the horde. "CELESTIA BUCKING DAMMIT!!!" yelled the mare as she shot another volley of magic blast at the demonic horde. Who knew walking through a grave that was near Everfree forest to get there faster would be a bad idea? "The undead? Really?" The disembodied voice of Trepp asked with a hint of boredom. "Heh what can I say? You can't beat the classics," commented Deadman as the two chaos gods watch the young mare fight her way through another obstacle the the Deadman had placed before her. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ “You’re probably right,” Twilight said, pushing play on the remote. Interlude (*Cues: Invader - Jim Johnston*) Wiz: Today we're pitting two of the most worthless damsels in distress against each other. “That seems a bit harsh,” Spike said, taking a bit out of a gem. Boomstick: If they're not getting kidnapped, they're always nagging at you to do stuff. Wiz: Princess Zelda, from the realm of Hyrule… “That’s quite the elegant dress,” Rarity said, taking every detail of the dress. Boomstick: ...and Princess Peach, of the Mushroom Kingdom. “I love the dress,” Pinkie said, shoving a cupcake in her mouth as Rarity took a scroll and quill to sketch the dress down. She wants to see if she can recreate them for herself or maybe a fashion line. “So it’s a battle between princesses? That’s interesting,” Twilight said “This would have been a good episode for Aunt Celestia and Luna,” Cadance said giggling a bit. Wiz: I'm Wiz and he's Boomstick, and it's our job to analyze their weapons, armor, and skills to find out who would win a Death Battle. Zelda (*Cues: Ocarina of Time - Zelda's Lullaby (Orchestrated)*) Wiz: Being a descendent of the house of Hyrule, Princess Zelda has spent her entire life governing her kingdom. Despite having a king, the majority of royal decisions are actually made by her. “You know that has me thinking why do we call Celestia and Luna princesses instead Queens?” asked Applejack. “Well from what aunty Celestia told me was that during the whole Sombra situation and a lot of other bad Ponies that had the title of King and Queen made the titles themselve look at with disdain during the early rean of the two sisters,” Cadence explained in great detail. “So…what you're saying is Sombra and some other losers made being called king and queen a bad thing?” Rainbow Dash simplified getting a nod from the princess of love. “Exactly Rainbow Dash!” praised the pink princess with a big smile. Getting a bashful blush from the blue mare. “Huh? And I thought it was to sell toys,” said Pinkie Pie with a shrug, getting a few odd looks sent her way. Boomstick: Talk about a control freak. And why do they let her get away with it? I mean, she's lost her kingdom to the forces of evil more times than I can count! “So what? Three time?” snarked Rarity. Getting a chorus of laughter from the rest of the group Wiz: Between being waited on hand and foot, Zelda has spent some time training with her modest arsenal. “At least she can fight,” Rainbow said, not feeling to impressed with Zelda. Background Full Name: Zelda Hyrule, Princess of Destiny Race: Hylian 7th Sage/Maiden Descendent of the Goddess, Hylia Blessed with Wisdom of Nayru Stubborn & Feisty Noble & Wise Boomstick: Bows, magic, musical instruments. She also has a sword and dagger, but has little experience with them. Her weapon of choice is the bow, which she wields with deadly accuracy. Plus, she can use her magic to turn an ordinary arrow to the powerful Light Arrow, perfect for killing evil. “I should look to see if there’s a spell like that in the archives,” Cadance said to herself as the others were awed by Zelda’s powers. “Those arrows would make things so much simpler,” Rarity said, shaking her head. Those arrows could have helped them during the Changeling invasion if they would work. “They could've easily stop that mean old Sombra from hurting any ponie,” added in Fluttershy as she held her Doomguy plushie tighter while she remembered the evil monster that called itself a king. Weaponry Royal Sword Dagger Light Bow (Weapon of Choice) Light Arrow (Destroys Evil, can even damage phantoms) Wiz: Speaking of which, Zelda is an incredibly potent spellcaster. While most of her magic is for use out of combat, she is more than capable of holding on her own. She can teleport with Farore's Wind, shield herself with Nayru's Love, and cast pyrokinetic projectiles with Din's Fire. Magic Minor Telekinesis Prophetic Dreams One-Way Telepathy Farore's Wind Nayru's Love DIn's Fire Healing Spells “Strange names. Do they mean something?” Applejack asked getting no answer from her friends. Boomstick: Also, she can talk... with dead people. “Eeep!” squeaked Fluttershy. Wiz: Spirits. Boomstick: Like Boos? “What are Boos?,” asked Rainbow Dash. (*Cues: Legend of Zelda: Skyward Sword - Ballad of the Goddess*) Wiz: Zelda is also the bearer of the Triforce of Wisdom, a testament to her astute mind. This greatly enhances her magical prowess and gives her the power to dispel evil. She is even skilled enough to create long-lasting disguises. She used the guise of Shiek to evade Ganon's tyranny for over seven years. “That must of been hard, hiding away as you kingdom fell into the hands of some maniac,” sad Twilight Sadly. Boomstick: Wait, that's a chick?? But where's her...um... “Don’t you dare ask that Boomstick,” hissed out Rarity. Wiz: It SHOULD be noted however that the forms of Sheik and Tetra are nothing more than disguises, and abilities attributed to them would naturally be available to Zelda. Triforce of Wisdom 1/3 of the Triforce Enhances Magical Ability Leads Bearer to Wise Decisions Protects Bearer from Evil Creates Faultless Disguises (Sheik of the Sheikah, Tetra the Pirate Captain) Boomstick: Yeah, but why would you want to toss tiny needles at people when you can shoot fireballs with your mind? “Agreed,” said everyone. Wiz: While Zelda is clever, mystically powerful, and helps battle Ganon when necessary, she repeatedly relies on the aid of others. Her success at avoiding capture can be largely attributed to her guardians and sanctuaries. “Sounds like she can’t do anything for herself,” grumbled Applejack. “How does she get anything done?” asked Spike. “While I can understand keeping the rulers safe and all but aunty Celestia taught me all i know in magical combat and I've even saw her and aunty Luna train in the their private training room,” said Cadance. Getting a little annoyed with the more she heard about the princess. Boomstick: She's really good at getting other people to do stuff for her. “Uge… those kind of nobles,” sighed an annoyed Twilight. Never liking some of the snooty nobles in canterlot that would get the royal guards to do their dirty work for them. Wiz: Right, she is a master manipulator. She can always convince a naive young hero to do her dirty work for her with little or no reward. Feats Escaped Capture as Sheik for 7 Years Leader of the 7 Sages Never Questioned by her Subjects Briefly Trained in Combat with Link Often Helps Finish off Ganon Usually Relies on Guardians & Sanctuaries “Now that's just not right!” ranted Rainbow Dash, thinking that not rewarding someone for doing your job was a huge load of bull. “You could've at least thrown him a party.” added an annoyed Pinkie Pie. Boomstick: How many times does this guy have to save you? Put out already! “I already did,” Cadance said to herself with a silent giggle thinking about her brave knight back home and the time he would save her and get a “reward” for his brave deeds. For some reason Twilight felt a little sick and embarrassed for some reason and she doesn't know why. Link: You called for a hero, princess? Zelda: Yes! But I guess you'll have to do. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ The girls and one dragon thought that while Zelda had the powers and equipment. They believed that she lacked experience to actually fight. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Peach (*Cues: SSBM - Princess Peach's Castle*) Wiz: At first glance, Princess Peach appears to be your standard meek and helpless damsel-in-distress. “Oh?” everyone said hoping to hear about a princess that was more active in her role in defending her kingdom. Boomstick: And that's pretty damn accurate. Being a member of the Royal Toadstool family, Peach spends most of her time getting herself kidnapped, or baking cakes in the kitchen like any good woman should. The girls didn't know what to be madder at. Boomstick’s comment or the fact that Peach was going to be another let down. Wiz: Despite being a wealthy princess with a royal guard more than capable of defending the castle, she has been kidnapped over a dozen times. Background Full Name: Princess Peach Toadstool of the Mushroom Kingdom Favors Technique over Power Classy & Graceful Resourceful & Athletic Generous to a fault Has been playable in 39+ of her 57+ games “How many time?” asked a wide eyed Twilight and Cadance. “Oh boy,” groaned out Spike as he knew he was going to have to keep the two princesses calm during this one. Boomstick: Yet somehow, while still behind bars, she can send mail to Mario through outer space containing items and extra lives. Hey lady, next time, just send yourself! “That seems really ridiculous and that's coming from me!” yelled Pinkie Pie. “How is that even possible?” questioned an annoyed Twilight. Wiz: Peach is an extremely athletic and capable fighter. She has participated in a variety of different sports, including soccer, basketball, and kart racing, and has survived every Mario Party. And as we've said before, Mario Party is no walk through the park. “At least she seems to keep herself in shape and stays active,” complemented Rarity, impressed the delicate looking princess could survive a death trap like mario party. Boomstick: Peach's unique array of weaponry includes a tennis racket, golf club, frying pan, and turnips! Which she can apparently pull out of her... “Boomstick!” yelled Rarity as Twilight covered Spike’s ears. “You know at this point i've seen so much from this show should you even care what i hear at this point?” deadpanned Spike. Wiz: She ALSO wields Perry the Parasol, an umbrella capable of powerful strikes and magical properties. Weaponry Tennis Racquet Golf Club Frying Pan Turnips (Can be plucked from any location) Perry the Parasol (Can transform to suit terrain, stun enemies) Peach Bomber “It looks cute,” whispered Fluttershy as she stared at the happy looking parasol. Boomstick: Oh, and one of her most valuable weapons is her ass! She can hit someone with that thing so hard that something down there explodes. “Sigh…” Rarity could only shake her head in annoyance. “Dem peaches,” said Pinkie Pie. biting her lip and wear a pair of sunglasses. (*Cues: Mario Strikers Charged - Peach's Theme*) Wiz: Peach also wields a form of magic called Heart Power. With it, she can float in midair for an indefinite period of time, cast healing spells, and summon lambs from the sky to put her foes to sleep. “Those seem like… interesting powers.” commented Twilight not really knowing how to feel about the last one. Boomstick: Don't pet that sheep, or you might wake up in a stranger's van. Even though the group didn’t know what a van was they at least get the joke and found it in poor taste. Wiz: And ever since being touched by the Vibe Scepter, she can channel her emotions into raw mystic power. When she rages, she becomes invulnerable but slows tremendously. Boomstick/Rainbow Dash: Hold up! Touched by the WHAT NOW??!! “Oh Celestia no,” whispered Rarity in dread. Wiz: The Vibe Scepter. It took a second for the rest of the girls to get what was the big deal about the name but when they did there face’s turn beat red. “Oh my,” squeaked out a beet red Fluttershy. Boomstick/Rainbow Dash/Pinkie Pie: (*laughs*) “Really?” asked Applejack as she gave a flat look to her two immature friends. Rarity could only cover her face in her hooves as she gave of a pained groan. Wiz: Oh.... (*clears throat*) But Peach's magic reaches its climax with- “Of sweet harmony,” groaned out Twilight. “Heh heh…” Cadence chuckled nervously. Boomstick/Rainbow Dash/Pinkie Pie: (*laughing uncontrollably*) Wiz: ...with her mega strike technique, Empress Peach, a kick so powerful, it splits a soccer ball into three separate ones, delivering enough force to score three times. Boomstick/ Dash and Rainbow: (*continues laughing*) STOP! I CAN'T TALK! “Stop laughing!!!” screamed a crimson faced Rarity. “NEVER!!” laughed the two laughing mares. Vibe Powers Joy: Wind-Powered Flight Gloom: Increases Speed & Damaging Tears Calm: Creates a Healing Bubble Rage: Invulnerability & Increases Weight Mega Strike Empress Peach Wiz: Peach's Heart Power also naturally dispels evil magics, which is the actual reason why Bowser always kidnaps her. “Huh, makes sense it’s like if someone tried to capture us back when we had the elements of harmony,” said Twilight. Boomstick: Really? I thought it was because of... well... “Don’t. You. Dare,” Rarity gritted out. Wiz: Peach has assisted Mario in battles several times, once even saving him from Bowser on her own. Even so, she still needs rescuing on a daily basis, and her gratitude usually only goes as far as a kiss and a cake. “Well at least she’s willing to fight,” commented Applejack. “And she gives Mario a reward at the end,” added in Fluttershy. Boomstick: What's with all these princesses not puttin' out? Give it up already! “Shut up boomstick,” the two princesses in the room said in a flat tone. Feats Eager to Assist in Battle whenever she can. Once saved the Mario Bros. from Bowser Single-Handedly Survived every Mario Party Can Never avoid a kidnapping Awful Employer Bakes really good cakes Peach: Listen everybody! Let's bake a delicious cake... for Mario. “The cake better not be a lie,” growled out Pinkie Pie. Wiz: Alright, the combatants are set. Let's end this debate once and for all Boomstick: It's time for a Death Battle! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ While both combatants were interesting in their own ways the group decided to go neutral on this battle. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Death Battle Peach gently lands with her umbrella onto a wooden bridge in the Mushroom Kingdom as Zelda teleports in front of her. FIGHT! (*Cues: Super Mario RPG - Through the Tree Stumps and Mushrooms (Remix)*) Peach pulls two turnips out from the bridge and throws them towards Zelda, who deflects them back at her with Nayru's Love, causing them to hit Peach. She then begins crying and runs towards Zelda, who begins slipping due to Peach's tears leaving a trail of tears on the ground, then Peach jumps back and uses Peach Bomber, knocking Zelda back. Zelda then teleports behind Peach and kicks her into the air, then casts Din's Fire multiple times, knocking her further into the air. Zelda then teleports by Peach, kicking her multiple times, before kicking her downwards toward the ground. Zelda then teleports back onto the bridge and uses a charged strike, knocking Peach further back, who shouts. “Wow for a dainty little thing this Zelda can put up a fight,” Applejack said surprised at the ferocity that the the two princes were showing. Peach then gets up and uses Heart Power to summon a Sleepy Time Sheep, which appears in front of her, flies upward into the air, then downward towards Zelda. Zelda uses Nayru's Love once again to deflect the sheep back at Peach, who then knocks it back into the air with a swing of her umbrella. “Sheepy no!” cried Fluttershy as she saw the poor sheep fly off in the atmosphere. Zelda then teleports in front of Peach and slaps her, to which Peach slaps Zelda back. The two then trade slaps until Zelda is dazed, allowing Peach to bring out a frying pan and hit Zelda with it, bouncing her back twice. “Peach is not letting up,” Twilight said surprised at the skill that Peach was showing. (*Cues: Final Demise - The Legend of Zelda: Skyward Sword*) Zelda gets up and prepares her bow and light arrow and Peach goes into a rage, walking slowly towards Zelda while surrounded by fire. Zelda then fires the light arrow at Peach, which cancels out Peach's vibe power, then causes the wooden bridge to shatter into tiny pieces. “Not the smartest thing to do,” Fluttershy said Dryly. Both Peach and Zelda begin falling, with Peach's fall controlled with the umbrella. Zelda teleports above her and begins firing Din's Fire multiple times while repeatedly teleporting, most of which miss, but one strikes Peach when she attempts deflecting it with her frying pan. Zelda then teleports in front of Peach, which Peach anticipates, and she begins striking Zelda with her umbrella and slaps, ending with her swinging her umbrella, knocking Zelda upward as Peach lands gracefully to the ground. “Gotta admit that Peachy can really fight!” cheered Pinkie Pie. (*Cues Staff Roll from The Legend of Zelda: Skyward Strike*) Peach then uses Heart Power, regenerating her four hearts. Zelda heals herself as well, regenerating her twelve hearts, then begins casting Din's Fire once again, which Peach counters by throwing turnips. Meanwhile, the Sleepy Time Sheep, which had been knocked into the air by Peach earlier, has now begun falling back down at increasing speeds as Peach and Zelda continue throwing their projectiles. Eventually, the sheep finally lands on Zelda, putting her to sleep while standing before disappearing. “Ok I call shenanigans on that!” yelled Spike. “Yay~ sheepy came back!” cheered Fluttershy. (*Cues: Mario Strikers Charged - Peach's Theme*) Peach: Alright! “Here we go!!!” yelled Rainbow Dash getting pump for the finisher. Peach then makes a huge leap backward, gains her Empress Peach wings, then flies toward Zelda and delivers the Mega Strike to her head. This causes Zelda's head to explode bloodily, as she cries out. Peach then lands, with her opponent decapitated. The group could only stare wide eyed at the brutal kill by the Mushroom Princess. Peach: Did I win? “Ya… in the most brutal way possible,” deadpanned Applejack. K.O.! Results (*Cues: Super Mario RPG - Forest Maze*) Boomstick/Rainbow Dash: GOOOAAAL!!! “Rainbow Dash!” yelled Pinkie Pie. “What?” asked a confused Rainbow Dash with a raised brow. “Too soon,” said Pinkie Pie while wearing red rim sunglasses. Wiz: Zelda's offensive arsenal is relatively limited and predictable compared to Peach's quirky repertoire. “Not only was it lacking but those light arrows only really hurt evil beings,” Twilight lectured. Boomstick: And while most of Peach's attacks aren't fatal, the mega strike, Empress Peach, gave her a leg up. “Already to the puns Boomstick,” asked Pinkie Pie a little disappointed at the host for jumping to the puns jokes. Wiz: See, a soccer ball is typically a kept add up to 12 psi, but since Peach's mega strike creates 2 more, it has enough force to add up to 24 pounds per square inch, or about 165,000 newtons per square meter, as of 1,000 newtons of can cause decapitation and 15 psi can shatter the human skull, the mega strike is so over-excessive it didn't just kill Zelda, it obliterated her. “Too much math…” groaned out Rainbow Dash as she held her poor head. “You can never have too much Math!” yelled Twilight as she held up a math book. Boomstick: She got kicked in the face really hard and it went boom. “Thank you,” said Rainbow Dash with a voice full of gratitude. “Spoilsports,” pouted Twilight. Wiz: Yeah, in layman's terms, I guess... Boomstick: Peach sure fleeced Zelda in this fight. “Better!” chirped Pinkie Pie happily. Wiz: The winner is Princess Peach. END! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Boomstick: Next time on Death Battle. It was dark. They heard thunder and saw lightning. When a lightning bolt struck, they saw a silhouette… in the shape of some kind of hammer. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ “That was interesting,” Cadance said, getting off the couch and onto her hooves. She saw Twilight and her friends walk towards a box as she said, “Is that the box that gives you stuff?” “Yeah and it gives us some awesome stuff like comics, shirts and stuff,” Rainbow said, hovering over the box. Twilight opens the box as Rarity lets out a happy little squeal. Inside the box were a bunch of dresses that Peach and Zelda wore. “Oh, these dresses are marvelous,” Rarity said, grabbing a dress and inspecting it. “Ugh, is there anything else in there?” Rainbow said, moving away from the box a bit. “Nope, that seems to be all that’s in there,” Twilight said, moving a few more dresses away. “Then I’m outta here,” Rainbow said, flying out the window. “Well today was interesting,” Cadance said, flying back home. “I’m gonna need to train once I get home. Don’t want to end up like Peach or Zelda,” she said, thinking of where to start on her workout. Maybe Shining would have an idea. Thor VS Raiden.The girls were sitting in the viewing room while Pinkie and Spike were in the kitchen, getting some snacks for everyone. The others were discussing who could be the next combatants. “So all we know is that either one or both use a hammer,” Rainbow said, scratching her chin. “Maybe. It could be just one of them,” Applejack said, speaking her own thoughts. “Then what can the other fighter have?” Twilight asked, looking at her friends. “It is possible that the other combatant can use lightning,” Rarity said, causing everypony to look at her. “If you remember, the trailer showed a lightning bolt.” Before anypony could say anything, the room was filled with a bright light that blinded everypony. When the light died down, the occupants of the room saw none other than Princess Celestia standing there. “Princess Celestia,” Twilight said, running up to her mentor. “Hello, Princess Twilight,” Celestia said, smiling at her former student. “What’re you doing here? Not that I mind,” Twilight said, smiling bashfully. “I had a bit of free time and thought that I could watch another episode with you and your friends,” Celestia said, walking over to the couch. “We’d be happy for you to join us,” Twilight said as her friends nodded and Pinkie with Spike came out of the kitchen with snacks. “Hey princess,” Spike and Pinkie said greeting their guest. Celestia gave them a smile as she said, “Now that everyone’s here, we can can watch the episode, right?” “Of course,” Twilight said,grabbing the remote and pressing play. Interlude (*Cues: Invader - Jim Johnston*) Wiz: The gods of thunder may endure eternal rule, but in the ring together, they are anything but immortal. “Oh my!” where seeing a fight between gods!” gasped out Rarity. “So coool~!” cheered out Rainbow dash. Boomstick: The mighty Thor, prince of Asgard... “A god and a prince?” asked Applejack, surprised at the title combo. “He seems nice,” whispered Fluttershy. While everyone was talking about the prince of Asgard no one noticed Celestia giving a surprised look at the first fighters introduction. Wiz:...and Lord Raiden, defender of Earthrealm. “So he’s a guardian god,” commented Celestia. Shaking of her previous shock. Boomstick: He's Wiz and I'm Boomstick. Wiz: And it's our job to analyze their weapons, armor, and skills to find out who would win a DEATH BATTLE. Thor (*Cues: Thor (2011) - Sons of Odin*) Boomstick: In Norse mythology, Thor is the god of thunder, strength, healing, and...oak trees? Well regardless, he was badass enough to get his own comic book. “What’s wrongs oak trees?” said Twilight with a glare. Still sore about what happened to her old home. Background: Real Name: Thor Odinson the Mighty Height: 6'6" Weight: 640 lbs. Secret Identity: Dr. Donald Blake Skilled Surgeon & Medic Guardian of Midgard A.K.A. Earth Superiority Complex Wiz: Thor Odinson was conceived between the Allfather and Earth's Elder Goddess with the intent of creating the strongest man in the universe. He can lift over a million tons, move at supersonic speeds, never feel exhaustion, survive the vacuum of space, and talk with frogs. “I’m surprised that you're not angry at another pony faster than you?” questioned Applejack getting a blank stare from Rainbow Dash. “Well I can’t can’t really compare to a god now can I?” said Rainbow Dash showing a great amount of maturity and humility. “That was quite mature of you Rainbow Dash,” praised Celestia with a motherly smile. Getting a bashful look from the blue mare. Boomstick: He's immune to poison, burns and electrocution, and he can survive the heat of the Sun, or even a planet-bursting explosion. Well, I guess that's what happens when God bangs the Earth. “I'll say! Them are some mighty fine genes that boy has,” Applejack said with amazement. “Ok I can easily say this guy can beat me any day of the week.” gulped out Rainbow Dash. she might be prideful but even she knows when to pick her battles. Wiz: While Thor is not invulnerable, he is augmented by his godly status and a fraction of the all-powerful Odin Force sealed within Mjolnir, his enchanted hammer. “Fascinating!”said Twilight as she took dawn notes on Mjolnir in her notebook mutch to the amusement of her former teacher. Superhuman Abilities: Super Strength Supersonic Speeds Self Sustenance Inexhaustible Stamina Nigh-Invulnerability Super Breath Immunity to Ailments Boomstick: That's his weapon??? That thing is way too tiny! I mean, if he was the god of mending fences or something I guess I could say - "The thing still looks like it could do some damage," said Rarity. not understanding why Boomstick was making fun of Thor's hammer. Thor smashes the Rainbow Bridge with Mjolnir causing a great explosion. “WHOA!!!” most of the group yelled as the sound from the explosion was blasting through the speakers, nearly knocking them back from the volume. The only one who wasn’t blown back was Celestia who just stared with a small smile and a look of nostalgia in her eyes. Boomstick: WHOA! Oh shit! Never mind! (*Cues: Thor(2011) - Prologue*) Wiz: Mjolnir is mystically bound to Thor, and obeys him as if it were alive. And if it were any larger, it would be too heavy to wield. “Learning a lot Twilight?” asked Celestia with a mirthful smile, all she got was a quick nod from the young alicorn who was too focused on writing down what she was seeing. This caused Celestia to let out an amused smile as she patted Twilight’s mane. Boomstick: So it's not the size of the hammer, it's how he uses it! “Darn it boomstick! you couldn't help yourself could you?” ranted Rarity. But a winged hug from the sun princess help calmed her down. Wiz: It was forged by dwarves using the core of a dying star, which went supernova and killed all the dinosaurs. “That's so super duper extra cool!” Pinkie Pie cheered. “Heck ya it is!” agreed Rainbow dash. Boomstick: Yeah. Forget anything that I said earlier. I'm liking the dino-slaughtering hammer. Where can I get one? “Ya where!?” asked Rainbow Dash, Pinkie Pie, and surprisingly Twilight as well and with a look of child like glee. Wiz: Mjolnir can only be wielded by Thor. Boomstick/the three mares : Aww. Wiz: Although there is a work-around. Red Hulk once carried the hammer into space because Thor was still holding onto it, which may be one of the dumbest technicalities ever. “That’s an odd loophole.” commented Rarity thinking a weapon should be heavy to an enemy even if the wielder was still holding it. Mjolnir: Bound to Thor Literally means 'Crusher' Forged from a Starcore Momentum Based Flight Unbreakable Anti-Force Energy Blasts God Blast (Summons his energy into a beam capable of slaying immortals) Boomstick: But Mjolnir is not the only thing in Thor's arsenal. He wears the Belt of Strength which -surprise! - doubles his already powerful might. “Ahhhh~ it’s always good to see accessory at work,” said Rarity “Wouldn't mind having that belt,” Applejack said as she eyed the belt on screen imagining that belt helping her make work at the farm a lot easier. Megingjord: Nordic Title: Megingjord Belt of Strength Doubles Thor's Physique Wiz: And naturally, as the god of thunder, Thor can manipulate the weather. Storms, tornadoes, the wind. He can even summon deadly bolts of lightning. “Oh my it’s like he’s a super Pegasus,” commented Fluttershy as she was starting to enjoy this fighter even though he was big and tough looking she couldn't help but feel calm when looking at him. “More like a pegasus god!” awed Rainbow Dash. Boomstick: He also has some control over the earth. He can make earthquakes that span entire continents. “And now add Earth pony god on that growing list of magic,” deadpanned Applejack. Godly Powers: Weather Manipulation Wind-Powered Flight Earthquake Control Immortality Warrior's Madness Berserk State Healing Powers Wiz: Thor has fought and defeated many of the most powerful warriors in the Marvel universe. He's mastered enough martial arts to box Captain America to a standstill, and even overpowered the Hulk. Although, in the past, he could lose his powers when separated from his hammer. “That’s an odd weakness?” commented fluttershy. Boomstick: Which is pretty stupid, considering his main method of attack is throwing the damn thing. “And that’s the worst thing to do,” deadpanned Spike. Wiz: But through some convoluted magic absurdity, this is no longer a problem. In fact, he has no specific physical weaknesses, though he suffers from a superiority complex. Arrogant and eager to fight, he often ignores even the most perceptible risks. most of the group stayed silent as they all turn their attention towards Rainbow dash. “... welp i guess Dash is a demi-god,” joked Applejack electing a few laughs from the group except said blue mare who was glaring at them. “Oh buck the lot of you!” yelled the annoyed speedster. “Naw you should save that for sonic,” joked Pinkie. Getting even more laughter from the group. Feats: Master Marksman Top Flight Speed: Mach 32 Martial Arts Mastery (Viking, Celtic, Saxon, German, & American fighting styles) Overpowered the Hulk Can Destroy Adamantium Escaped a Black Hole Strongest Asgardian, aside Odin, lifted the Midgard Serpent Boomstick: I like him! Thor hits a Frost Giant with Mjolnir, knocking him into an icy wall. Thor: Next? “So coool~!” everyone said. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ The group agreed that thor was a powerhouse and if he could control his arrogance he could win. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Raiden (*Cues: Parotoe - Mortal Kombat Theme (Metal)*) Wiz: According to Japanese legend, Raiden is the god of thunder and storms who, when angered, devours the stomachs of children as they sleep. “WHAT!?” screamed the girls as they all turn green in the face at the thought of a monster that eats children's guts. Boomstick: Mmm, child haggis. Just like Mom used to make. Well, whenever he's had his fill of defenseless, sleeping children, I guess he decided to protect the Earth from evil. “Why would his mom make haggis out of kids?” whispered out Fluttershy. But not getting answer from her friends who were still stunned at the last part. Wiz: Raiden is the defender of Earthrealm, and a key leader into shielding it from the forces of Shao Kahn's Outworld. “Who’s this Shao Kahn we keep hearing about?” asked Rainbow Dash. they heard about him from Akuma vs shang battle and now here. “Meh no one to worry about until season 2.” said Pinkie Pie. getting a few confused looks from her friends. Background Full Name: Lord Raiden Height: 7' Weight: 350 Lbs. Age: Eternal Protector of Earthrealm Martial arts mastery Jujitsu, Nan Chuan, Judo, & Taekwondo Boomstick: He's a master of several fighting styles, and amps them up with powerful electric attacks. He sometimes wields a wooden staff, but generally prefers his fists. “All ways good to have a weapon as a backup,” commented Spike. Wiz: From the mobile kicks of Tae Kwon Do, to the anti-armor combat of jujitsu, Raiden's wide variety of fighting styles complement each other perfectly to take down any kind of opponent. “Always have a plan for any situation,” said Celestia. Writing that one down,” said an excited Twilight as she was happy to see even a shred of her old mentor teaching again. Boomstick: This thunder god used several lightning-charged special attacks, like the Vicinity Blast, Electric Fly, and the Shocking Touch. Not to mention, when finishing his foes, he discharges so much electricity into them that they combust. The sheer power of these lightning attacks apparently overload his brain, causing him to spout out random gibberish in mid-attack. Special Moves Lightning Shots Vicinity Blast Shocking Touch Electric Fly Electric Slide Teleport Fatalities Raiden uses his Electric Fly on Jax. That got the group laughing at that random scene. (*Cues: Mortal Kombat - Eternal Life (Metal)*) Wiz: As an eternal god, Raiden is entirely composed of ethereal energy, and can morph into various forms of electrical force. With this trait he gains teleportation, flight and unlimited endurance. The girls found those skills to pretty neat. Boomstick: And like any other thunder god, Raiden has all sorts of control over the weather and lightning. “So same power as thor?” Rarity asked “Though he seems to be lacking in the whole Earth shaking powers” commented Applejack. Wiz: Raiden has so much power he can even achieve scientifically impossible things, like channeling electricity through insulated wood. Boomstick: Haha, take that physics! “No! Not physics!” cried out the purple alicorn. Wiz: He is one of the most powerful characters in the Mortal Kombat universe, and has successfully defended Earth for centuries. He eventually became the all-powerful Elder God of Earthrealm, but relinquished this power in order to protect the people of Earth. “He did what?” the group asked. Godly Powers Ethereal energy composition Weather manipulation Electricity manipulation Flight Healing powers Immortality Eventually reincarnated after death Boomstick: Wait, what? That doesn't make any sense. “He’s right! Why would raiden do that?” asked a confused twilight. Wiz: While he is an immortal, formless god, he is not indestructible and has limits. In order to fight among others, he must take a form susceptible to mortality. So he tosses his immortality aside to protect the people of earthrealm.” said Celestia with good amount of respect in her voice. Boomstick: But he still retains all of his godly powers and is tough enough to effortlessly smash through solid concrete. “Dang!” gasped out Applejack. Wiz: Through his numerous success in defending Earth against impossible odds, Raiden has proved his greatest attribute to be his leadership and wisdom in battle. He is a cunning and daring strategist, willing to make whatever sacrifices is necessary to achieve victory. “Lives aren't just pawn in a game of chess,” said Fluttershy as she gave the screen a weak glare. Feats Most powerful Mortal Kombatant Held off limitless-power Kano Has mastered 750 varieties of Jujitsu Was the last man standing against the Deadly Alliance Defeated the Houan necromancers Can channel electricity through wood Went toe-to-toe with Superman Effortlessly lifted a Plane Boomstick: Like this guy! That guy! And all of these guys! Raiden: a physical example of sacrificing others for the greater good. “It’s not the greater good if innocent lives are the cost,” countered Twilight said with narrowed eyes. Raiden: Hehehe...sorry. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Wiz: Alright, the combatants are set. Let's end this debate once and for all Boomstick: It's time for a Death Battle! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Team Thor: Celestia, Rainbow Dash, Rarity, Applejack, Pinkie Pie. Team Raiden: Twilight, Spike. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Death Battle Thor stands in an empty field. Then Raiden appears in a shower of electricity. Both take fighting poses. FIGHT! (*Cues: Liquid Tension Experiment - Acid Rain*) Raiden shoots two bolts of electricity as he moves away. Thor effortlessly blocks them, then throws Mjolnir. Raiden disappears and Thor's weapon comes back to its owner. Raiden then appears behind Thor and unleashes a combo, then uppercuts Thor in the air where he continues his assault. Raiden then teleports and attacks from multiple angles, managing to stay ahead of his opponent, before throwing Thor to the ground and knocking him away with Vicinity Blast. Thor hits the ground, then stands back up. “Thor looks like he’s not even hurt,” said an awed Fluttershy. Thor: Have at thee! Thor uses Mjolnir to summon lightning. Thor: Mighty Spark! He fires a blast of lightning at Raiden, but he manipulates it for his own, and rebounds it. Thor then stops it with Mjolnir and jumps toward a tree, uprooting it, then punches it. It flies toward Raiden, who disintegrates it with a blast of electricity. Thor then slams the ground, summoning an earthquake, which causes Raiden to stumble. Afterward, Raiden jumps, then flies away. Thor accepts it as a challenge, and flies toward him. They rush at each other, and collide, summoning a massive discharge of electricity, but it turns out that Thor has kicked Raiden with both of his feet. Raiden then flies back-first into a mountain wall, but gets back up and starts running. "I'm surprise that Raiden could get up after that," commented Rainbow Dash. Amazed at the durability the the older looking god had. "I could only do that when I had all of the Alicorn magic in Equestria and even then I couldn't just get up like it was nothing," gawked Twilight. Thor throws Mjolnir again, but Raiden teleports away, causing Mjolnir to hit the mountain before returning. Raiden resumes running, then, knowing Thor is coming right towards him, turns around and fires two electric bolts while jumps. Thor knocks both aside and then kicks Raiden into the air, followed by a powerful blow with his knee. Raiden flies downward, first hitting a rock formation with his back, then lands to the ground. But Thor suddenly lands to the ground, causing Raiden to stumble. Thor then grabs onto Raiden, headbutts him, then slams him to the ground. “He’s making sure Raiden can’t get away and have time to think,” Stated Celestia as she had her eyes focus on every detail. "It's a brutal but efficient strategy," added in Twilight. (*Cues: Frost Giant Battle - Thor (2011)*) He jumps back into a safe distance and summons a tornado. Raiden disappears, and reappears inside the tornado. He fires a barrage of bolts, which catch Thor off-guard, who is unable to block them all. Raiden then uses a huge discharge of electricity, stunning Thor. Raiden teleports to Thor, who is still stunned, but as Thor recovers and is about to attack, Raiden uppercuts him far into the air. Raiden follows Thor and the two clash with a flurry of blows, ending with Raiden grabbing Thor and unleashing his Shocking Touch... which has no effect on Thor. “At this moment Raiden new… he done bucked up,” Pinkie Pie said with a very soothing voice that could lull a dragon to sleep. Thor: Away with you! He slams Raiden downward, who falls to the ground. Everyone had to wince at least a little at the brutal slam. Thor: Feel Heaven's wrath! He summons a massive electric blast to fire at Raiden. Raiden sees it coming, and in the aftermath, has absorbed all of its electrical power. Raiden then flies upward with Electric Fly, but Thor swings Mjolnir below Raiden's stomach, destroying his lower body. Thor grabs takes Raiden above the clouds and throws him upward. “Whoa!” yelled Applejack at the brutal scene. “Finnish him!” yelled Pinkie Pie with a crazed look in her eyes. Thor: Farewell! The thrown Raiden leaves the earth and flies through space until reaching the Sun. Raiden then melts away, causing a tiny shockwave on the Sun's surface. Most of the group could only stare at the godly display of strength with everyone almost lost for words. “Fatality!” laughed Pinkie. K.O! Results (*Cues: Thor (2011) - Yggdrasil*) Boomstick: That seemed a bit overkill. I liked it! “And it was awesome!” yelled Rainbow Dash. Wiz: Raiden is a clever and versatile combatant, but was completely overpowered by Thor's strength. “Even i can admit that sometimes brawn can beat brains,” Twilight said. Boomstick: It also doesn't help that Raiden's main weapon, electricity, was completely useless. Add in Thor's hammer and game over. “It’s like throwing fireballs at a dragon,” Spike commented. Wiz: Remember, Mjolnir was forged using the core of a dying star. When a star dies, it collapses into a super condensed neutron star. Even the smallest portion of this star can weigh 1,000,000 tons. Raiden stood little chance against a blow like that. “No arguments here,” everyone said. Boomstick: Well, at least Raiden finally found his place in the sun. (cue facehoof) Wiz: The winner is Thor. END! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ After the battle, everyone gathered around the glowing box. “C’mon box. Let’s see some good stuff today,” Rainbow said, hovering in the air. “Aw, didn’t you like what we got yesterday?” Pinkie asked innocently causing the others to giggle. “What, no, I just want to see what we get today,” Rainbow said quickly. “Settle down girls. The box stopped glowing,” Celestia said, pointing out the now not glowing box. Twilight nodded and open the box to reveal more comics and a couple of hats for everyone. “Sweet,” Rainbow said, grabbing a few comics and a hat of Thor. “I wonder if this could go with that one outfit I’m working on,” Rarity said, picking up one of Raiden’s hats. She was trying to see if it could go with the dress that Chun Li inspired her. As everyone took a few things, Celestia cleared her throat and said, “Goodbye everyone.I will say I had fun and can’t wait for the next time.” She then teleported back to her room and walked over to her vanity mirror. Celestia channeled her magic from her horn into the mirror itself as it started to warp until the image of a man appeared. “Ah Celestia, it’s been awhile,” A blonde haired man said from the mirror “That it has and you wouldn’t believe what I just saw,” Celestia said smiling. “Oh?” “I saw you and and elder god fight on this show,” Celestia said matter factly. “Hopefully they got my good side,” the blonde showing off his pearly white teeth with a smile. “You always ask that, Thor,” Celestia said, rolling her eyes. “And I was able to use it to swoon you, my dear,” Thor, the blonde, said while laughing heartily. “Yes, that was back when you had good pick up lines,” Celestia said giggling to herself. “You wound me my dear.” The blond god of thunder said with a fake look of pain, getting a few laughs from the two but soon a serious look crossed his face . “I must ask how is SHE doing?” Thor asked in a concerned voice. Celestia had a sad smile on her face and said, “I haven’t seen her for so long. My student has told me that she’s been making friends and enjoying her life for the most part. I just wonder what she’s doing right now.” “She’s probably having fun with her friends like she should be,” Thor said while laughing. “I’m sure she’s also causing her own brand of trouble two,” said the white mare with a small smirk. “HAHAHA! No doubt! She does take after us after all!” laughed the Asgardian. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ at the human world~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ In a small family owned bakery on another world, a group of friends sat at a table while drinking their coffees. All except for one person. Looking at her drink, a red and yellow haired girl asked, “What’s this?” One of her friends, a bushy pink haired girl, said, “Why that’s a triple chocolate cappuccino, Sunset. Just try it.” The girl, now named Sunset, grabbed the cup and inspected it. After taking a long sniff, she brought the cup to her lips and downed the hot beverage in one gulp which impressed her friends. “Well?” the pink haired girl asked. Sunset just sits there for a moment before throwing her cup onto the floor causing it to shatter. “I’ll have another!!” Sunset said loudly. The rest of her friends and the owners of the bakery could only sigh as Sunset did this with every new thing she tried. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Chapter end! Next time Cloud vs Link. Link VS Cloud.“So you haven’t found Starlight yet?” Twilight asked her brother. After hearing it from her brother, she slumped against couch and was feeling even more worried than before. Shining, who was sitting on the couch with Twilight, shook his head and said, “We had the guards looking at the crash site and had them cover a two mile radius from the site. All they found were some hoof prints leaving the site.” “So there’s a chance she didn’t…,” Twilight said, not wanting to finish the thought. Shining scooted over and gave Twilight a hug, calming her down a bit. “Hey, I’m sure Starlight’s okay. She’s smart and from what Spike told me, can hold her own against you. So don’t worry,” Shining said, comforting his sister. “I just miss her, BBBFF,” Twilight said, hugging her brother a little tighter. ~~~~~~~~~~ where in the world is Starlight Glimmer? ~~~~~~~~~~ We find Starlight sleeping near a campfire that she had setted up after her fight with the undead warriors of nightmare moon. The young mare slept restlessly from the cold and wounds dealt to her from some of the creature getting too close to her. As the young mare slept a figure slowly rose from the flames of her camp fire revealing itself to be the chaos god Deadman who then made his way towards her, only stopping when he was standing over her. As he stared down at the battered mare who was breathing heavily the chaos being simply tilted his head and a sound like breaking glass could be heard in the far distance. Starlight soon started to breathe more calmly in her sleep and her wounds started to vanish as if they never happened and then a blanket appeared on her causing the young mare to smile in her sleep. Seeing his work done Deadman vanished from the camp leaving the sleeping mare unaware of her meeting with a chaos god. (the void) As deadman appeared back into the black void of space he was met with the blank stare of trepp. “That was unnaturally nice of you.” stated the board god as he gave his fiery friend a curious look. The mad god could only shrug. “I might be a Trickster but I’m not a sadist.” he stated as the two turn their attention back to the main group of interest. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ “I’m sure she’ll be back before you know it. So dry those tears,” Shining said, nudging his sister slightly. Twilight giggled and nudged him back. “We interrupting something,” a southern voice asked. Shining and Twilight looked towards the door to see Applejack and the others standing there, looking at the two curiously. “No, we were just having a sibling talk,” Twilight said, feeling a bit better, “Anyways, you girls ready for the next episode?” “You betcha Twilight,” Pinkie said, bouncing towards the couch. Once she sat down, she put her hooves into her mane and pulled out a box of donuts. Opening the box she said, “Want one?” Everyone declined as Spike came waddling in with a bowl of jewels and a couple of other snacks. “You didn’t start it, right?” Spike asked, taking a seat in a bean bag chair. “We were just about to start,” Twilight said, pressing the play button. Interlude (*Cues: Invader-Jim Johnston*) Boomstick: They're two of the most iconic swordsmen in video game history, known for taking on things way out of their league. Wiz: Link, the champion of Hyrule... "wow only great knights are given the title champion," Shining said. impressed with the young looking worrier. Boomstick: And Cloud Strife, guardian of the lifestream... and orphans. "That's great," Said Fluttershy as she looked at the spikey haired swordsman with admiration. Wiz: Since both combatants use vast player-customizable arsenals, in this scenario they will wield what they are most comfortable taking into battle. Boomstick: They use the weapons they choose to bring into their fighting games. However since standard skills, weapon traits and armor aren't specified in Dissidia and Smash, we're taking those from their whole story. Wiz: And remember in Death Battle, there is no outside help allowed. Boomstick: Aww, but Boomstick, they have summons and they're cool, and fairies, and their– SHUT UP! This is our show, and this is the the way we do it! Wiz: I'm Wizard and he's Boomstick, and it's our job to analyze their weapons, armor, and skills to find out who would win a Death Battle. Link (*Cues: Soul Calibur II - Link's Theme*) Wiz: Link is the multi-incarnated hero of the Hyrule Kingdom. Humble and brave, he has defeated the forces of evil for ten generations. Boomstick: Each fairy hero is linked... Haha! ...to each other. "HA I get it!" laughed Pinkie Pie. Wiz: No, Boomstick, he's not a fairy. Boomstick: Pointy ears, tights, magic, and look at that hair! Fairy! "I don't get it," Fluttershy muttered confused. Wiz: Each incarnation of Link bears the Spirit of the Hero, bestowing the unbreakable will and combat prowess of each previous owner. Background Age: Around 17 Height: 5'7" Bears the Spirit of the Hero Left-Handed Multi Incarnate Humble & Brave Skilled in Boxing & Sumo Wrestling Boomstick: And he's got over ten links of learning to work with, he's an expert with tons of weapons and magic, especially his iconic Master Sword. When the group saw the blade in question they were for a lost of words when they laid eye’s on the Masterpiece of a weapon. It was a double-edged arming sword with a narrow ricasso and a wide, shallow fuller that runs almost the entire length of the blade The symbol, which are three triangles that form together, is seen engraved in the lower part of the blade and a yellow gemstone embedded in the blue crossguard which resemble outstretched wings wings. “It’s… beautiful,” whispered Twilight as she stared at the blade. “If i had a blade like that then Sombra and Chrysalis would've never been a problem,” said Shining armor as he imagine how the sword would of made them into mince meat. “Oh my~ that blade needs to be put on a pedestal so the world can see it!” gushed Rarity as she loved the elegance of the sword. Wiz: This double-edged blade was forged by the goddess Hylia to slay powerful demons. It repels evil and deflects light-based magic. “So it can defend against light and darkness.” Spike said amazed that there was such a diverse weapon. “I gotta admit it’s pretty cool.” said Rainbow Dash. Boomstick: And when Link's in top shape, he can shoot beam thingies out of it. Why this changes when he takes a hit, I don't understand, but hey, LASERS! “Maybe he needs to be at full health to handle it?” suggested Fluttershy. “That or the creatures were worried it would break the game if they didn’t put that drawback in,” commented Pinkie Pie. Wiz: When low on energy, the Master Sword can still launch the Skyward Strike by calling on help from above. In addition, it utilizes three magical medallions. Master Sword aka Goddess Sword Crafted by the Goddess Hylia Repels evil Indestructible Sword Beam/Skyward Strike Deflects light energy magic Medallions Bombos - Launches fire Ether - Freezes foes Quake - Makes earthquakes (*Cues: The Legend of Zelda: A Link Between Worlds - Hyrule Castle*) Wiz: However, the Master Sword is far from Link's only weapon. The group leaned in to hear more about the green clad worrier’s arsenal. Boomstick: He's got some deep pockets. He somehow carries around a boomerang and tons of bombs, along with a hookshot which helps him zip line his way around and brings things to him. Man, that really would've helped to get that last beer all those times on the couch. Probably still be married. Rarity could only shake her head at Boomstick’s comment while Pinkie was bouncing around and talking about all the cool bomb’s Link had. “I wouldn't mind having something like the hookshot,” mumbled Spike imagining having something like that to get around and make up for his lack of wings. Weaponry Boomerang (Attacks up to 5 times; always returns) Bombs (5 second fuse; Water Bombs; Bombchus) Hero's Bow (Fire Arrows; Ice Arrows; Light Arrows; Silver Arrows) Hookshot/Clawshot Wiz: Doubt it. Link is an excellent archer, and uses the Hero's Bow in conjunction with several arrow types. However, much of Link's arsenal is more suited to exploration than combat. “True but it still gives him a good set of equipment that can help him in different situations,” said Applejack, liking the fighter more she heard about him. “Well said Applejack,” complemented Shining armor getting a nod of thanks from the farm mare. Boomstick: Which is why he hides behind several layers of defense, like the Red Ring, which reduces injury by 75%. “Now that’s something i wouldn't mind having,” said Fluttershy as she imagined not having to worry about getting hurt as easily. Wiz: The Golden Gauntlets brace his arms against intense pressure, though do not increase striking power. He also carries three different pairs of boots. Boomstick: Three, huh? Told you he's a fairy. Everyone chuckled at that. Wiz: The Iron Boots weigh 130 pounds, the Hover Boots float in midair, and the Pegasus Boots with attached Roc's Feather increases Link's speed and agility to superhuman levels. “Awww ya! Of course the best boots are called the Pegasus Boots!” bragged Rainbow Dash. getting some eye rolls from her friends. “Though i have to wonder who made thouse boot’s” wondered Twilight. Boomstick: But his best defense is the Hylian Shield. Yet again the group were impressed with the craftsmanship that was put in when making this shield. (*Cues: The Legend of Zelda: Skyward Sword - Staff Roll*) Wiz: Originally forged from the Thunder Dragon Lanayru, the Hylian Shield is completely indestructible. “It was made by a Dragon!?” gasped out spike as he started liking the shield more and more. “Not only that but made by a Thunder Dragon!” added in Twilight with a voice filled to the brim with amazement. “Why’s that amazing twi?” asked Rainbow Dash as the rest of the group wondered as well. “Thunder Dragons are a rare and strong sub species of dragons that breath out lighting instead of fire and are immune to fire and Lighting but are very secluded and live far away from other species, even other dragons.” lectured Twilight. Armor Red Ring (Defense +75%) Chain Mail Shirt (Riveted) Golden Gauntlets (Bracers can withstand over 1000 tons) Boots (Iron Boots; Hover Boots; Pegasus Boots & Roc's Feather) Hylian Shield Bomstick: Link also has a little help from the goddesses, via the Triforce of Courage. This tiny golden triangle embodies his ability to beat overwhelming odds. “Such a small symbol is the source of his power?,” Rarity commented. Wiz: He is a puzzle solver, analyzing and exploiting his opponent's' weaknesses even when there is only one possible means of winning. But while Link has the necessary tools to take on any opponent, his over-reliance of inventory over pure skill leaves him vulnerable. “So take away his equipment and he’s pretty much helpless,” said Applejack. “Seems like a very severe weakness,” commented Spike Boomstick: Still, anyone who can fight a guy three times his size, while wielding a sword twice as large as he is, is a badass in my book. With so many weapons and skills, there are few who can stand a chance against the Hero of Hyrule. Plus, if he dies, we can always just clap and bring him back to life. Feats Bears the Triforce of Courage Puzzle Solver Has Single-Handedly beaten Armies Fought a huge variety of foes Z-Targeting=Very Fast Reactions Strong enough to throw armored Gorons Wiz: HE'S NOT A FAIRY! “Hahahahahaha!” laughed Rainbow Dash and Pinkie. Link pulls the Master Sword out of the pedestal. Cloud Strife (*Cues: Final Fantasy VII - Mako Reactor*) Wiz: Cloud Strife, guardian of the Lifestream, is no ordinary swordsman. “What is the life stream?” Twilight asked. “Sounds beautiful” said Fluttershy. Boomstick: There's no way around it. He's a fucking super soldier, but damn, he's in desperate need of a haircut. “It is quite odd looking,” commented Rarity as she stared at the golden spiky mess of hair on top of Cloud’s head. Wiz: Impulsive and moody, Cloud strove to join the illustrious Shinra organization. Instead, he was forcefully exposed to Mako poisoning, a raw energy drained from the planet itself. Background Age: 24 Height: 5'7" Superhuman Strength & Speed Retains Zack's Memories & Skills First Class Soldier Training Impulsive & Moody Inferiority Complex “His group betrayed him?” Fluttershy gasped. Horrified that somepony was used by his own group. Boomstick: And somehow it gave him all the memories of his dead buddy, Zack, including his First Class soldier training. Thanks, convenient planet poison. The group was sadden to hear that not only did the organization that he work hard to join betray and use him, but he also lost his best friend. No powers and skills will ever be able to make up for what he lost. Wiz: That's not all Cloud inherited from his friend. His main weapon is Zack's Buster Sword, a colossal single-edged blade. With his strength, Cloud can swing this much faster than any normal human. The group’s jaws fell to the floor when they laid their eye’s on what was a monster of a blade that was six feet long, with a single-edged large blade approximately two foot wide, with The handguard colored gold and has swirl designs, the part of the blade bearing the two holes is raised slightly and sectioned off from the rest of the blade, and there are etchings engraved on the blade near the handguard. “So AWESOME!” scream Rainbow Dash as she imagined fighting monsters with it. “Might want to tear your eyes away from that sword or your boyfriend might get jealous,” mocked Applejack but the only response she got from the blue mare was her taking a notebook out of her saddle bag and start writing down in it. “Um darling what are you writing?” asked Rarity but before she could get a response from the blue mare they were interrupted by boomstick. Boomstick: Holy shit! Look at it! That's a man's sword right there! “Totally agree Boomstick!” yelled Dash as she completely dodge the question. “darn it.” Rarity said as she realised Rainbow Dash just outwitted her. Buster Sword Length: 6' Width: 2' Base Power: 19 Base Accuracy: 96% 2 Linked Martial Slots Single-Edged Broadsword Passed Down between Angeal, Zack, & Cloud Wiz: The Buster Sword contains two slots for materia, condensed Mako that grants magical abilities. However, since their creation damages the planet, Cloud has limited his materia use. “Sad that he’s limit on his arsenal but i can respect somepony who protects his planet like that,” said a impressed Applejack. Boomstick: He typically carries the Firaga materia, which shoots fire at things. And in the second slot, we're giving Cloud his most iconic materia, Thundaga. This materia can shoot electricity and summon lightning bolts. “Fascinating!” said Twilight with a childlike glee as if she was a foul that just saw a new toy. Materia Fire/Firaga Level (Fire, Fira, & Firaga attacks; Projectile Based Pyrokinesis; Use Slightly decreases Strength) Lightning Bolt/Thundaga Level (Thunder, Thundara, & Thundaga attacks; can summon lightning from the sky; can launch bolts of electric magic; use slightly decreases strength) (*Cues: Final Fantasy VII - Bombing Mission*) Wiz: Cloud has an encyclopedia worth of anger issues, which actually works to his advantage. He can channel his rage into extremely powerful Limit Break attacks. “I think this is the first time that anger can actually be a good thing,” Spike said as he remembered where anger was the last thing that was needed. Boomstick: These emo-charged Limit Breaks range from paralyzing foes with Cross Slash to launching meteors from his sword. But his deadliest move is the Omnislash, a move so quick and powerful, it practically guarantees victory. The group was stunned when they saw Cloud zoom towards his enemy and unleash a barrage of slashes before finishing off with a powerful downward slash. “Whoa…” everyone said. Wiz: As he doesn't carry any other materia, Cloud obviously wears Ziedrich armor. While this magical band has zero materia slots, it grants the wearer an extraordinary amount of defense, and halves damage received from elemental, magical and physical effects. “Now that’s some mighty fine armor! Applejack said. Impressed with what it could do. “Again some armor i wish my men had.” lamented Shining armor. Boomstick: Also, Cloud wears a ribbon, which makes him immune to all status effects like burns and stuns. Well, I guess that makes it worth wearing a freakin' chick accessory. “I actually find the ribbon quit fetching!” Rarity countered. Armor Ziedrich (Defensive Stregth: 100%; Magic Defensive Strength: 98%; 20% power increase; halves damages; 0 materia slots) Metal Pauldron Ribbon (grants immunity to status ailments including burn, ice, poison, etc.) (*Cues: Unknown Theme*) Wiz: Cloud is brash and aggressive, but not the brightest fighter. He often relies on overpowering opponents through sheer ferocity and brute strength. “My kind of guy- and shut the buck guys!” Rainbow shouted before anyone could say a word. Boomstick: Like a badass! You don't need to think too hard when you're strong enough to cut through freakin' skyscrapers. Cloud's single handedly taken down quite a few powerhouses, like the giant Bahamut SIN, and planet-busting Sephiroth. He's even been completely impaled and shrugged it off like it was nothing. Multiple times! I mean, look at this shit! Feats Defeated Sephiroth/Jenova 3 times Killed Bahamut SIN Works Best as Point Man in a Team Focuses on Overpowering Foes Has Survived Several Longfalls Shrugged of Impalement Multiple times The group gawk at the amount of punishment that Cloud was able to shrug off like it was nothing and get right back into the fight. Wiz: It's impossible to deny, Cloud's superhuman abilities make him one of the deadliest swordsmen in video game history. Boomstick: Even if he looks like a girl. Cloud cries over Zack's death. That got the group quit teary eyed at the seen and Even fluttershy was hugging her doom guy Plushie even tighter trying not to cry. Wiz: Alright, the combatants are set. Let's end this debate once and for all. Boomstick: It's time for a Death Battle! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ On team Link: Twilight, Spike, Rarity, Applejack. And on team Cloud: Rainbow Dash, Pinkie Pie, Fluttershy. And shining decided to be neutral on this one. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Death Battle (*Cues: Those Who Fight/Fighting (Metal) - Final Fantasy VII*) Link and Cloud face each other, swords drawn in a large Screwattack arena. “Whoa!!! 3D graphics!” screamed Pinkie, as the rest of the group where just as surprised at the new look. FIGHT! Cloud charges at Link and tries to swing his Buster Sword, but Link blocks with his Master Sword. Cloud is sent backwards, while Link is sent into the air. While in the air, Link fires two Sword Beams at Cloud, who deflects them. Cloud then jumps into the air, performs a flip and smashes his Buster Sword into the ground, causing a shock wave to go straight at Link, who blocks the attack with his Hylian Shield, but gets launched back. Cloud charges at Link and they both swing at each other. Cloud uses Cross-Slash on Link who blocks with his Hylian Shield and on the last swing Link rolls under Cloud. “Wow this is getting intense!” awed Twilight as she saw the two blond swordsmen go blow for blow. “That shield is going to be tricky for cloud to get through though,” said Rainbow Dash as she watch said shield protect its wielder from harm. (*Cues: Powerglove - Power, Wisdom, Courage*) Link strikes Cloud with a Spin Attack, who is sent flying back. Cloud uses the Thundaga Materia and fires multiple shots at Link, who runs and blocks them with the Master Sword. Then Link jumps and performs another Spin Attack, deflecting the Materia. Cloud jumps into the air and fires a huge Thundaga at Link from above. Link uses his Master Sword to absorb the Thundaga and as Cloud lands, Link fires a Thundaga-fueled Skyward Strike at Cloud, who gets hit and is sent flying. “Now that's using your head their!” cheered Applejack getting cheers of agreement from the rest of team Link. “Grrr! Go get him cloud!” yelled Dash, as Pinkie waved a flag with Cloud’s name on it, (*Cues: Final Fantasy VII: Advent Childern - Tenrai - Divinity II*) As Cloud remains in the air, Link takes his Hero's Bow and fires arrows at Cloud, who deflects them with his Buster Sword. Cloud lands and charges at Link, who charges an Ice Arrow. Once Cloud is close enough, he fires it, freezing Cloud, but thanks to Cloud's Ribbon, he immediately thaws out. Cloud charges Link at swings, but Link dodges and throws a Boomerang, leaving him defenseless for a moment and allowing Cloud to deliver a series of sword strikes on him. Cloud then proceeds to use Climhazzard and Link attempts to counter with his Master Sword. Cloud eventually performs a mighty upswing, knocking the Master Sword out of Link's hands and forcing him to hide behind his Hylian Shield. Cloud delivers blow after blow on Link's Hylian Shield. (*Cues: The Legend of Zelda: Skyward Sword - Staff Roll*) Then the Boomerang from earlier comes back and hits Cloud, stunning him for a few seconds. Link uses his Hookshot and retrieves his Master Sword. Link then swings at Cloud, sending him flying. In the air, Cloud uses his Firaga Materia and fires a few shots at Link. Link puts on his Pegasus Boots, begins to increase his speed, and runs with his Hylian Shield outstretched. Dodging the Firaga, Link stops and runs up a pillar. Link launches himself at Cloud, striking him with another Spin Attack. Link lands on a platform above the ground, while Cloud lands on a small ring on a pillar. Cloud then uses Meteor rain, sending meteors at Link. “Run Link!” screamed team Link as most of team Cloud was cheering at clouds attack. (*Cues: Final Fantasy VII - Battle in the Forgotten City*) Cloud: Stars, rain down! “Oh my.” fluttershy blushed at clouds soft voice. Link uses his Hylian Shield and blocks every meteor. While Link is distracted blocking the meteors, Cloud charges and strikes Link with his Buster Sword, sending Link into the air. “GOOO! CLOUD!” Cheered Pinkie Pie while Waving around Pom-Poms. Cloud: This ends here! Cloud then performs his ultimate technique: the Omnislash Version 5, on Link, who manages to block the majority of the attack with his Hylian Shield. Once Cloud goes for the final strike, Link uses Z-Targeting to execute a well-placed sword swing, striking Cloud in the middle of the final blow and causing him to slam into the ground. “That was a move only master swordsmen can pull off,” said Shining in awe of the green clad swordsman's skill. (*Cues: Gerudo Valley - Legend of Zelda 25th Anniversary Symphony*) As Cloud falls to the ground on his knee, succumbing to his wound, Link throws a flurry of Bombs. The bombs explode, sending Cloud flying in the air, and with help from the Triforce, Link performs the Fatal Blow, piercing through Cloud. Link lands with his Master Sword buried into the ground as Cloud's lifeless body falls shortly after. Link then gets up and walks away. Team Link cheers as Clouds team sigh in defeat and Rainbow comforts a sadden Fluttershy who looked to be on the verge of tears. K.O.! Results (*Cues: The Legend of Zelda - Main Theme Orchestra*) Boomstick: Whoa! Chalk one up for the fairy guy; that was awesome! “Ya that was a good use of bombs,” admitted Pinkie Pie. still sadden that Cloud had lost. Wiz: In what might be the closest duel in Death Battle history, Link's combination of arsenal and strategy were just enough to defeat Cloud's brute force. “This time strategy was the most deadly weapon,” commented Twilight as she got a nod from her brother. Boomstick: Not to mention his items helped him match Cloud's superhuman abilities. Wiz: Cloud may be powerful, but Link's Golden Gauntlets were stronger. In Ocarina of Time, Link used them to lift – and throw – an enormous column of granite. As granite weighs 166 pounds per square foot, this means Link can withstand over a thousand tons of pressure, surviving any of Cloud's assaults. “Those gloves and shield were just too deadly of a combo to get through,” Applejack Stated. “Ya without those gloves Link's arm would of been torn or broken if he tried to block one of clouds attacks.” stated Shining Armor. Boomstick: Cloud should've had his mind on more than just the Master Sword. Wiz: The winner is Link. END! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Boomstick: next time on death battle! The group sees the camera slowly zoom back as they soon see a mark that looked like a spider. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ “That was so awesome. Did you see those moves?” Rainbow said, pointing at the TV. “Yeah Rainbow, we just saw it,” Applejack said, rolling her eyes. “Still it was exciting to see those two duke it out.” “The fight was great. Now let’s see what we got from the box,” Spike said, running over to the box. He stands by the box with an excited look on his face as the box began to glow. Spike opened the box just as the other got there and showed them what was inside. Everyone looked inside and saw a bunch of figures, a couple of orbs and a few bottles. “Sweet. I gotta have this,” Rainbow said, grabbing a figure of Cloud. “Same here,” Spike said, taking a figure of both Link and Cloud. He walked towards the couch as he was already playing with them. “Oh, there’s even a ribbon,” Rarity said, using her magic to grab the red ribbon. As she was looking it over, she said, “I’m gonna need to make a new ensemble for this.” “Only you would make a new dress for a ribbon,” Applejack said, rolling her eyes. Beside her, Fluttershy was trying one of the ribbons to her Doomguy plushie while humming a little song. “What’re these? ...They look like ….materia,” Twilight said amazed, levitating the rest of the orbs in front of her. Seeing the dangerous glint in her eyes, Applejack cleared her throat and said, “Now sugarcube, don’t do anything reckless.” “I’m only gonna study them and these bottles. Maybe we could use them without destroying our world,” Twilight said, grabbing the bottles and putting everything in a bag for later. “Guess I’ll take this. It looks like a pretty good replica,” Shining said, levitating a replica of the hylian shield. It looked like a very detailed replica and it was the only thing left in the box. “Anyways I should get going. I’ll see you next time Twilight, Spike, girls,” Shining said, waving goodbye to everyone. Later; at the crystal empire. Shining opened the door to his and Cadence’s room to see his wife and daughter on their bed. Walking towards them, Shining said, “I’m back.” Cadence turned around and said, “Shining, when did you get back?” “Just a little while ago and had a good time with Twiley,” Shining said, putting his saddle bags and shield down. Cadence saw the shield as Flurry Heart crawled towards the edge of the bed. “Did you get that from Twilight’s box?” Cadence asked, curious about the shield. Unaware to them, Flurry Heart started to breathe a bit heavily. “It’s just a prop from the fight today,” Shining said, holding it up as Flurry Heart just sneezed and fire a magic beam at him. Seeing the danger, Shining did the one thing he was trained to do at a time like this. He held the shield in front of him and closed his eyes, waiting for the beam to hit the shield. Standing there for a moment, Shining felt the force of the beam then opened his eyes to see Cadence with her mouth open as Flurry clapped her hooves and shot another beam at him. Shining held the shield but didn’t close his eyes as he watched the beam hit the shield and push him back a bit. The surprising thing was that the beam sputtered once it hit the shield and turn into a bunch of sparks. Looking up at his wife, Shining said, “I’m keeping this.” ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ CHAPTER END! NEXT TIME BATMAN VS SPIDER MAN! Batman VS Spider-Man.It was the next day as Spike lead Rarity and everyone else to the viewing room. “You girls ready for the next episode?” Spike asked looking back at his friends. “I’m always ready,” Rainbow said, throwing punches in the air. “I just hope we see some more cool fights.” “While I don’t share Rainbow’s enthusiasm, I wouldn’t mind seeing more of the contestants. I could always use more ideas for my boutique,” Rarity said as she muttered the last part to herself. They were just about to enter the viewing room as Fluttershy was busy playing with her Doomguy Plushie. “Well, why don’t we start up the next ...episode?” Applejack said as they saw a strange sight before them. They stood in the doorway and saw Twilight sitting on the couch with ...Mare-do-well facing away from them? That was strange. Twilight saw her friends and said, “Hey Spike, girls. C’mon in.” “Uh, Twi. Who’s that?” Applejack asked, pointing at the masked pony on the couch. Said pony looked at Applejack with their head tilted to the side, confusing the farmer mare more than she was before. “Well I think it’s Pinkie Pie,” Twilight said, beckoning them over. Not sure of what’s going on, the ponies and dragon walked into the viewing room and took a seat on the couches. Applejack looked at Twilight and said, “Not to question you Twi, but you sure that’s Pinkie?” “She’s been here for a while and she did keep one of of those costumes,” Twilight said sounding sure of herself. The others shrugged as Twilight started the next episode. Interlude (*Cues: Invader - Jim Johnston*) Wiz: They're the guardians of the night. The superhero saviors of the lone and helpless. “Well that explains why Pinkie’s wearing the mare-do-well outfit,” said Applejack as she gave a side glance towards the disguised party mare. “...” said mare stayed silent as she kept her gaze towards the tv. Boomstick: Bruce Wayne, the Batman. “Why a bat?” Rarity asked, trying to hold back a shudder thinking about bats. “It will probably tell us during his segment,” stated Spike getting nods of agreement. Wiz: And Peter Parker, the Spider-Man. “(Groan) now spiders too?” whimpered Rarity, already thinking this episode was going to be horrible for her. “But Rarity spiders aren't really all that bad,” commented Fluttershy as she placed her Doomguy Plushie which was wearing a little cape and domino mask over it’s helmet, right next to her. Boomstick: It's no secret that given time for prep, both Batman and Spider-Man can defeat pretty much any opponent. That was an impressive claim that boomstick was boasting for the two fighters. Wiz: Which is why we're pitting them each other only with their standard equipment; gladiator style. Boomstick: He's Wiz and I'm Boomstick. Wiz: And it's our job to analyze their weapons, armor, and skills to find out who would win a Death Battle. Batman (*Cues: Batman (1989) - Main Theme*) Wiz: The Dark Knight is a master of the shadows, using intimidation as a weapon, he patrols the streets of Gotham City. Everyone except Pinkie Pie shuddered at the intimidating figure known as the Batman, even Rainbow Dash and Applejack felt like little fillies that just saw the boogeymare and poor fluttershy was hugging her Doomguy Plushie in fear. Boomstick: You know you're doin' something right when people are terrified at JUST your shadow. Pinkie Pie nodded her head as the rest of the group were busy being terrified of Batman’s shadow. Background Age: 41 Height: 6'2 Weight: 210 lbs Secret Identity: Bruce Wayne Net Worth: $6.9 billion Orphan 12 master's degrees Wiz: After his parents were murdered by the common thug, Bruce Wayne dedicated his life to fighting the criminal underworld. He achieved 12 master degrees, studied 127 martial arts, and perfected escape artistry. Given enough time, he can escaped any conceivable trap. The group had to hold back some tears when the saw the image of a young Bruce Wayne kneeling over his deceased parents. “How could something like that happen to a child?” Twilight asked. Wiping away her tears and hugging a teary eyed Spike. Even Pinkie who was still doing the silent act tipped her hat in respect and fluttershy was hugging her Plushie while tears traveled down her cheeks. The rest of the group stared down in sadness. “Well at least he’s fighting to keep others from going through what he did,” said Rainbow Dash. getting nods of agreement from everypony. Boomstick: Batman pushed himself to the limits of the human body: He can bench press 1,000 pounds and has great aim and reflexes. “My word! He truly has pushed himself to the limit,” gasped out Rarity. Skills Knows 127 martial arts Peak human conditioning Bench press: 1,000 lbs Leg press: 2,500 lbs Master acrobat and athlete Can survive in a vacuum for 27 seconds Genius intellect and strategist Master escape artist Ventriloquist Expert Detective “127 martial arts!” gasped out Rainbow Dash, extremely impressed. “And that strength.” marveled Applejack. (*Cues: The Dark Knight Trilogy - Main Theme*) Wiz: The Batsuit was designed to be the ultimate flexible, combat armor. The group marveled at the armor and how it had little to no weakness. “If only Shiny was here to see this.” said Twilight marveling at the fine suit. Boomstick: While the pointy ears are a bit much for me, the armor can stop knives and gunfire. “I like the ears though…” muttered Fluttershy muddered. Not understanding why Boomstick wouldn't want to look like a cute bat. Wiz: His memory cloth cape can be used as a glider and the entire suit is lined with a 200,000 volt electro network. “Sweet! He can glide too!” Spike said imagining having that cape and gliding around ponyville. “Wouldn't it be dangerous if his friends touch the suit and got zapped?” asked Applejack, not wanting to be on the receiving end of that shock. Boomstick: I guess when you're a billionaire, you can afford to turn yourself in a freakin' human taser. Batsuit Weight: 200 lbs Nomex reinforced fabric Fire-resistant memory cloth cape Bladed Gauntlets Steel-toed boots Nosepiece gas filter 200,000 volt electrode network Designed to evoke fear “Billionaire!?” yelled Rarity in shock. He was richer than all of her most well paying clients combined. Wiz: The gadgets from Wayne's never ending funds don't stop there. His utility belt carries DOZENS of different tools that can practically get him out of any situation. “There's more!?” cried a surprised Twilight. How much equipment does somepony need? “Yes more!” Rainbow Dash cheered. Wanting to see more gadgets that Batman had in his arsenal. Boomstick: That belt has pretty much EVERYTHING. Grappling hooks, explosives, beer. Maybe not that last one, but mine would. “Of course it would…” muttered Rarity with a blank stare. “Did he say grappling hook!?” Spike said excitedly. With Pinkie Pie showing a gleam of interest in her eyes. Wiz: Notable gadgets include a gasmask, tear gas, smoke pellets, a Kryptonite ring, remote detonated plastic explosives, and his trademark grapple gun. He also carries a large supply of collapsible shurikens. “Japony also have shurikens and from what I’ve looked up they can be extremely deadly,” lectured Twilight. “Maybe i should get some…” muttered Spike but a look sent his way from Twilight quickly told him that the answer is no. Boomstick: The batarangs! And if throwing razor sharp objects at people isn't enough, he's got several types! Like, the electric shock, knock out dart, and grenade. While everyone else was gawking at the different types of batarangs, Pinkie was keeping her focus on the Utility Belt and just stared at it with a gleam in her eye. Utility Belt Grapple gun Gas mask Tear gas Smoke pellets Bolas Tracers Transponder that summons bats Batarangs Wiz: Despite having the build of an olympic athlete, the caped crusader's greatest feat are attributed to his detective skills. He can anticipate attacks through muscle movement and can memorize the smallest detail, even the shape a cheek he's punched. And while Batman is only human, his achievement stand among gods. The group could only stare in admiration and feel inspired by batman’s feat’s. “So cool~.” Rainbow Dash said with nothing but admiration in her voice. Not missing a chance to crack a joke Applejack quickly said, “hope Sonic doesn't see ya goin all star struck at another guy,” she joked getting a few chuckles from the rest of the group except Rainbow Dash. The only response she got was for Rainbow Dash to take out her notebook again and start jotting something down and then putting it away. Confused Applejack was about to ask what that was all about but was interrupted by Boomstick. Boomstick: He's a founding member of the team of superheroes known as the Justice League. And he's even fought Superman! “He’s part of a superhero team!?” said an excited Spike. Thinking of his favorite Power Ponies comic. “Who’s this superman though?” asked Applejack, getting a shrug from the masked Pinkie Pie for an answer. “Maybe we’ll see him in death battle someday?” suggested Rarity, getting a few nods of agreement. Feats Solved numerous unsolvable crimes Invites near-death experiences Can best metahumans in combat Does not uses firearms Singlehandedly defeated Superman & the Justice League Only non-powered founder of the Justice League Wiz: But while Wayne has no exploitable weaknesses, he is not perfect. His mental stability has often been called into question. This got the group worried, wondering what was wrong with Batman’s mental health. Boomstick: Well, let's see. His parents were killed in front of him as a child, he uses his money to beat the shit out of people dressed as a giant bat, and keeps employing 12 year old sidekicks. Yeah, he's clearly not all there. “I can see their point on why everyone thinks he’s insane,” muttered Applejack. “Though the fact he channels it to fight for the innocent makes him an even greater hero.” Twilight said with everyone agreeing with her on that. Weaknesses No exploitable physical weaknesses Has to be rescued more than any other Justice League member Mental stability barely in check Wiz: But he IS a survivor. He endured being broken in half, fighting the other members of the Justice League, complete disintegration, and being stranded in the past as a living time bomb of galactic destruction. Boomstick/everyone: Wait, WHAT?! Even Pinkie Pie had to tilt her head in confusion. Wiz: Yet he somehow pulled through every time. Boomstick: Why? 'Cause he's the goddamn BATMAN. Thug: WHERE ARE YOU?! Batman: Here. Batman takes out the thug. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ After the first half was done the group quickly gushed how cool Batman was and agreed he truly did deserve to be called hero. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Spider-Man (*Cues: Spider-Man (2002) - Main Theme*) Wiz: The friendly neighborhood Spider-Man protects the streets of New York City. Boomstick: Once Peter Parker was a wimpy nerd with no friends. The group had to feel bad for Peter not having any friends. “I wonder why he doesn't have any friends he looks like a sweet young Stallion.” said Rarity, wondering why such a sweet boy couldn't make any friends. “He’s actually kind of cute,” Twilight whispered under her breath so nopony would hear her. Then he was bit by a radioactive spider that gave him weird bug powers, and now he's a radioactive superhero....with no friends. But after some practice and superheroing, he finally got himself laid. A lot, actually. Rarity was about to make a comment about Peter sleeping around until the Magic Box glowed for a sec and then shot a paper ball into a surprised Rarity’s hooves. “Hey it’s like that time with Shining and the whole Doomguy thing,” Rainbow Dash said getting surprised looks from the group as they all waited for Rarity to unscramble the paper and start to read. “So what does it say Rarity?” asked Fluttershy. After a few seconds Rarity stopped reading and neatly folded the piece of paper with a sadden look before releasing a sadden sigh. “It says that while Peter has had a lot of girl friends through the years, they never lasted for varying reasons, one of them being Peter’s enemies hurting him through the people he loved.” said Rarity with a single tear going down her face. The rest of the group was stunned silent but they soon bowed their heads in silence. Feeling sad for the spider themed hero and his tragic love life. Background Age: 25 Height: 5'10" Weight: 165 lbs. Secret Identity: Peter Parker I.Q.: 250 Orphan Science Major (*Cues: The Amazing Spider-Man Game - Main Theme*) Wiz: A clever photographer and science major, Spider-Man is not only incredibly powerful, but also a genius in strategy and science. Using these skills, he created two wrist mounted web shooters which let him swing around the city. “Wow sounds like Twilight’s dream guy,” teased Spike jokingly expecting Twilight to simply roll her eyes at the joke. He wasn’t expecting for her to turn beet red with a monster size blush. “Oh this is pure gold! First Dash and her crush on the blue hedgehog, and now you with your crush on Spider Man.” laughed Applejack along with the rest of the group much to the young alicorn’s charging. “Stop it!” yelled an embarrassed Princess as she covered her blushing face with her wings. Boomstick: You know, if he was SO smart, wouldn't he make the webs shoot out of his butt like a real spider? Wiz: NO, NO. First of all, it doesn't come out of their butt, it comes out of their- “Oh don’t you dare!” yelled Rarity. but it was too late as Boomstick did the worst. Possible. Thing! He sang! Boomstick: (to the tune of the Spider-Man song) ♪ Spider-Man! Spider-Man! Craps some webs like a spider can! ♪ “Dammit Boomstick!” screamed Rarity as the rest of the group laughed at the host’s terrible singing. (*Cues: Marvel vs. Capcom 3 - Spider-Man Theme*) Wiz: (rough) Each web shooter cartridge can hold a large amount of pressurized web fluid- Boomstick: AND SO CAN HIS GIRLFRIENDS! Haha! I'll be here all week. The group snickered at the joke while Rarity could only sigh in frustration, while Twilight and Fluttershy blushed at the joke. Wiz: (annoyed) .....and features a rotating carousel to replace the empty ones. “(cough) ok then! That’s… smart thing to do and keeps him from running out anytime soon in battle,” said Twilight as she fought down her blush. Web Shooters Twin Wrist-Mounted Carousel Loaded Webbing dissolves in 1 hour Web fluid cartridges pressurized at 300 psi Webbing is strong enough to restrain The Hulk Boomstick: His spider powers give him superhuman strength, speed, agility and durability. He can run up to 200 MPH, lift over 10 tons, and take a freakin' grenade to the FACE! The group were shocked at how strong Spider-man was and how much punishment he could take. Wiz: He can also knock out a dinosaur out cold with a single punch. “Awesome!” cheered Spike and Rainbow Dash while the others were impressed. Boomstick: Haha, suck it, Denver! Wiz: Also, by altering his body's electron attractions, Spider-Man can crawl along any surface. But his most advantageous power is the Spider-Sense. The group leaned in wondering what could be better then all of his other powers. Boomstick: It acts kinda like a warning signal, like caller ID when your ex-wife's calling for alimony. “I highly doubt it works like that…” muttered Rarity with a deadpanned tone. Wiz: Actually, the Spider-Sense is much more than a simple alarm. It gives Peter omnipresent detection to his surroundings. This is why he swings around New York without looking where he shoots his webs. And unlike his human senses, it is not affected by gases or toxins unless specifically tailored to the Spider-Sense itself. However, it's up to Spider-Man to recognize and react to his warning, so it can be tricked if he doesn't think he's in danger. “While it does have it’s fair share of weaknesses it’s still Peter’s most powerful ability,” Twilight said. (*Cues: The Amazing Spider-Man - Saving New York*) Boomstick: Still, combined with his speed, Spider-Man is almost untouchable. He can even dodge automatic fire. “Sweet!” said Rainbow Dash always liking it when speed is involved. Wiz: His unique martial art, The Way of the Spider, utilizes the Spider-Sense to its fullest. Spider-Man can go toe-to-toe with the most advanced masters of combat, even while blindfolded. “I have to admit Peter know’s what he’s got and knows how to use to it’s fullest.” complemented Applejack. Spider Powers Wall Crawling Superhuman Strength (Bench Press: 10 ton; Top Speed: 200 mph) Superhuman Speeds & Reflexes Superhuman Stamina & Durability Foreign Chemical Resistance Spider Sense Boomstick: No wonder other superheroes don't like this guy. I mean, the freaking Spider-Sense does everything for him! Now the group had to disagree on that one. Yes the spider sense was a huge advantage over others but Spider-Man still had to train to use it to it’s fullest potential. Feats Has defeated The Hulk Member of the Fantastic Four & the Avengers Developed unique ways of the spider martial art Has more girlfriends than any other superhero Destined teacher of Hope Summers, the Ultimate Mutant Wiz: Speaking of which, somehow, Spider-Man once tried to join the Justice League, but was rejected by Batman. “Ouch.” everyone hissed out. Must of hurt being denied to join a team of other superheroes. Boomstick: Ouch. I bet he wishes he can fight old Bats in a battle to the death - OH-HO, WAIT! “So it’s personal,” stated Fluttershy. Wiz: For all of his amazing powers, Spider-Man is not invincible. His bright and colorful costume makes stealth difficult, his durability has limits, and the oddly specific ethyl chloride pesticide is his Kryptonite. Also, any enemy with his speed comparable to his can outmatch his Spider-Sense. Weaknesses Durability has limits Spider Sense can be tricked of disruption by specialized drugs Arguably naive Anti-Spider Pesticide Ethyl Chloride “Those don’t seem that bad.” commented Spike Boomstick: Still, if those are only his limitations, how come he sometimes gets shot by a stray bullet? Wiz: Lazy, lazy writing. Mary Jane: Wait! Who are you? Spider-Man: You know who I am. Mary Jane: I do? Spider-Man: Your friendly neighborhood Spider-Man. END! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Wiz: Alright, the combatants are set. Let's end this debate once and for all. Boomstick: It's time for a Death Battle! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ On team Spider-Man: Twilight, Rainbow Dash, Spike. And on team Batman: Rarity, Fluttershy, Pinkie Pie, Applejack. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Death Battle (*Cues: Batman Returns - The Final Confrontation*) Spider-Man swings onto the rooftop of a building and waits. Batman then appears by jumping out of the shadows of the rooftop exit door. Spider-Man: You've got a black belt in stupid if you think you're gonna beat me. “Go get him Spidey!” cheered Rainbow Dash. FIGHT! Spider-Man shoots two webs, which Batman blocks immediately. Spider-Man shoots his webbing at Batman which pulls the caped crusader towards Spider-Man and hits Batman rapidly with multiple punches and kicks, but Batman knocks Spider-Man back with more powerful hits. Spider-Man bounces off the ground and lands on his feet, recovering instantly from Batman's furious attacks. “Batman is really letting him have it!” said Applejack in awe. “But Spider-man can take the hits,” countered Spike. Batman throws two batarangs, which was aimed at Spider-Man, one of which Spider-Man dodges and the other was simply threw away with Spider-Man's webs. Batman then throws an explosive batarang, striking the floor beneath Spider-Man's feet. Spider-Man however, simply believes that he missed him accidentally. “Run Peter!” yelled a worried Twilight. Spider-Man: It's just not your day pal... “And that smart mouth is gonna get ya killed,” stated Rarity. The batarang then explodes which sends Spider-Man high into the air, and Spider-Man then lands near the rim of the building. While Spider-Man was recovering from the explosion, Batman jumps behind him as the Spider-Sense picks him up and throws a smoke bomb just as Spider-Man turns around. While it does not affect the web slinger, Batman uses the smoke jump at Spider-Man and land a couple of hits on him, then knocks him back towards where he was. Fluttershy winced from hearing Batman beat Spider-man to a pulp. Spider-Man is now right at the edge of the building, where Batman throws bolas at him, wrapping around Spider-Man's torso. Spider-Man struggles to break free from the bolas, but then an explosive at near his feet explode, which was likely put there by Batman when the smokescreen was still up. “Man this guy really is sneaky!” gasped out Spike. Not even noticing that Batman had put down the explosive in the first place. Spider-Man is thrown off the top of the building from the force of the explosion. He starts to spin as he falls and then shoot a web at the building's walls to pull himself forward and stick to them. But the moment he touches them, Batman swings in with his grappling gun and kicks him straight through the glass, shattering the glass into pieces. “Bat’s is just letting up!” said a nervous Rainbow Dash. with Twilight next to her giving the screen a worried look. As Spider-Man bounces and tries to recover, Batman uses his grappling gun again and disappears on to the ceiling. Once he recovered, Spider-Man looks around the building for Batman. Suddenly, a batarang then flies in from the broken glass and breaks all the light bulbs, making the room completely dark. Batman tries to sneak up on the wall crawler, but triggered Spider-Man's Spider-Sense which alerts him. He then shoots a web from his left hand from his web shooter, bringing The Dark Knight down to the ground and making Batman visible to Spider-Man. “Ya! Spider sense for the win!” cheered Spike and Rainbow Dash, while Twilight let out a sigh of relief. The two continue to fight from inside the building. Spider-Man rapidly attacks Batman furiously, but Batman notices his pattern, and then Batman counters Spider-Man's quick attacks with more stronger, powerful attacks. Eventually, Spider-Man shoots his webs at Batman and web rodeo slammed him against the window, cracking some of the glass from the other side of the building. Spider-Man leaped across the room to Batman, ready to attack. Batman suddenly uses his bat transponder to summon a swarm of bats to come in, breaking the rest of the glass and pushing Spider-Man back, while also distracting him. Spider-Man then rushes up to him and kicks Batman out the window. Spider-Man: Pardon moi! Team Spider-Man cheered as they thought their fighter had won. Suddenly, the Dark Night's grappling hook snares Spider-Man's foot, quickly making our web shooter fall from the building as well. “Ya! Don’t let the varment win!” cheered Applejack as the rest of team Batman sighed in relief. He then starts shooting his webs again at The Dark Knight, pulling himself towards him to continue the fight. They both fall through the air, continuing to trade blows. Spider-Man pushes Batman downwards to try and make him hit the ground first, but Batman uses his glider to get back up to Spider-Man, put him underneath his foot and slam him against a bystander's car and smash it. Spider-Man lays down, trying to recover, as Batman jumps away from the vehicle which then, unsurprisingly, explodes sending Spider-Man flying through the air. “He really likes making things blow up huh Pinkie Pie? Asked Rarity, but only getting a silent nod from the disguised mare. When he gets back on his feet, Batman shoots his grapple gun, which Spider-Man ducks, evading Batman's attack. The two lunged at each other to attempt to attack, but Spider-Man is then electrocuted by Batman's 200 volt suit and knocked away by Batman, uncontrollably knocking down to the ground multiple times. Team Spider-Man winced as they saw their fighter get beaten mercilessly. While team Batman cheered for their Fighter. The Bat then throws two explosive batarangs, one which Spider-Man avoids, but as the second one flies away Spidey uses his web shooter to catch it saying "Whoopsy", throwing it back and hitting Batman, who shields himself, with his cape, from the explosion but is knocked back. Just as he recovered, Batman was suddenly hit by a web in the face, losing his sight and leaving Batman vulnerable. Spider-Man: Having fun yet? “Ya are ya?” snarked Rainbow, getting a scared gulp from team Batman. Spider-Man then shoots a barrage of webs, which hit Batman as Spider-Man shoots more webs at a more faster pace. Batman is eventually pushed into a giant web, which was created by the shoots that missed, and has his body constricted by the ones that hit him and couldn't break free of the webbing (which the webbing is strong enough to hold The Hulk or a person but dissolves in 1 hour). Spider-Man then shoots a load of webbing at once behind him to create a slingshot. “Nooo! Wined Rarity as she could see that Batman wasn’t going to win. Spider-Man: It's all or nothing! “GOOOOO!!!” cheered Twilight along with Spike and Rainbow Dash. Spider-Man pulls back on it and then rockets forward from the force and goes into a kick position. He nails Batman and separates his upper body and head from his limbs which are still caught in the web trap. Spider-Man/Rainbow: Loooossserrrr! “DAMN!” cried Applejack and Rarity, as Fluttershy covered her eyes from the gory seen. He lands, with Batman's torn up, bloody body sliding after him. Spider-Man: Sorry about that. Web Swing! Spider-Man then web swings away from the scene. K.O.! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Results (*Cues: The Amazing Spider-Man - Saving New York*) Boomstick: Damn that was brutal! Show it again! “Please don’t,” whimpered Fluttershy wishing she didn't just see that brutal victory. Wiz: Despite Batman possessing more skill and knowledge, Spider-Man's abilities ultimately overpowered his arsenal. “There's only so much that you can prepare for,” stated Twilight. Boomstick: To be fair, Bats might have been able to deal with Spidey's strength and speed, but that damn Spider-Sense changes everything! Wiz: Right, the Spider-Sense counters surprise and stealth, Batman's most valuable weapons. The group nodded in agreement. Batman relaid on those two things and when they were taken away, he lost a good chunk of ways to fight. Boomstick: But how could Batman lose to a wimpy Spider-Nerd, when he defeated the entire Justice League on his own? “What does being a nerd have anything to do about it?” asked the alicorn Princess with narrowed eyes. Wiz: Many of Batman's greatest achievements have required weeks or months of preparation and planning, which can hardly be compared to the one-on-one confrontation of a Death Battle. Keep in mind, if we have given Batman prep time, the same would be done for Spider-Man. “Learning about your enemy could go a long way,” Rarity said, agreeing with Wiz’s statement. Boomstick: And all of Wayne's money, and the Commissioner's men, couldn't put Batman together again. Everyone face hoofed at that terrible rhyme. Wiz: The winner is Spider-Man. END! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ “That was an intense battle,” Twilight said, getting off the couch. Everyone else copied her movement and started to walk towards the box. “Yeah, it was awesome,” Rainbow said, flying in circles. “Spider-man was dodging left and right but Batman wouldn’t let him go. That was my kind of fight.” “It was interesting but I think we should see what the box gives us today,” Rarity said, pointing at the glowing box. Everyone looked at the box as Pinkie grabbed the top and lifted it up. Looking inside, everyone saw a bunch of comics that everyone took. “Alright, can’t wait to see Spider-man kick some flank,” Rainbow said, putting the comic in her saddle bag. “Is there anything else?” Rarity asked, feeling a bit annoyed she was getting comics yet again. They did give her some ideas for dresses and suit but she wanted to get something a bit more useful like her ribbon. Twilight looked in the box and used her magic to pull out some kind of bracelet while Spike reached inside and pulled out some kind of claw. “Is that…” Rainbow said, looking at the items that her friends were holding. Twilight was looking at the bracelet while turning it every way she could until she saw a strange button. Pushing the button, Twilight was shocked as a webline shot out and stuck to the wall. Spike looked at the claw as he began to smile. Looking around the room, Spike pointed the claw at the door and pulled the trigger. The claw flew towards the doorknob and stuck to it while dragging Spike. The girls closed their eyes as Spike collided with the door, breaking it. Spike got back up and said, “I’m okay. Just need to practice.” “That’s not fair. Twilight gets a web shooter and Spike gets a grappling claw. You sure there’s nothing else?” Rainbow asked, wanting to get something awesome. She saw Pinkie hold up a belt and faste it around her waist. Suddenly the door slammed open as a familiar voice said, “Sorry I’m late. I had to help out at Sugarcube Corners.” Everyone turned towards the door and were shocked that Pinkie just walked into the room. Fluttershy, holding onto Super Doomguy Plushie, looked confused and asked, “What did you say, Pinkie? If you don’t mind.” “I was helping the Cakes, so that’s why I’m late. You didn’t start the episode, right?” Pinkie asked, looking ready for something “If you were helping the Cakes darling, then who was here with us?” Rarity asked, slowly turning to where ‘Pinkie’ was standing. The masked mare, seeing everyone looking at her, put her hoof next to the belt and pulled out a small ball like object and threw it towards the ground. The ball hit the floor and filled the room with a white smoke cloud. A moment later, the smoke cleared up and everyone saw the masked mare disappeared as they had one thought running through their heads. ‘Who was that?’ Later The masked mare appeared on a balcony at Canterlot Castle. She pulled off her mask to reveal the face of Princess Luna to the world. “Now my night time activities will be more fun,” Luna said, using her magic to undo the belt. Levitating the it in front of her, she said, “I will say that Batman has good tastes in these gadgets … He wasn’t bad looking himself.” said the princess of the night with a small blush. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Chapter end! Next time Pikachu vs Blanka Pikachu VS Blanka.Everyone just stood where they were, trying to figure out what just happened. They just saw Mare-Do-Well, who they thought was Pinkie Pie, use a smoke pellet and disappeared from sight. “That was strange,” Spike said, summing up everyone’s thoughts. “Yeah, um do you girls want to watch another one?” Twilight asked, addressing her friends but looked at Pinkie the next moment. “We could watch the episode again if you want to see it, Pinkie,” Twilight said, being nice to her hyper friend. “I can watch it later. Now start the next episode,” Pinkie said, bouncing towards the couch. The others just looked each other and shrugged helplessly. After they all took a seat on the couch, or cloud for somepony, Twilight pressed play on the remote. Interlude (*Cues: Invader - Jim Johnston*) Wiz: When you think of an electric charged combatant, these two always come to mind. Pikachu, Ash's first Pokémon... “Awwww~!” cooed Fluttershy when she saw the little yellow mouse. Boomstick: ...and Blanka, the man-beast of Brazil. “Now that’s a beast!” said Rainbow Dash after seeing the green beast. Wiz: I'm Wizard and he's Boomstick, and it's our job to analyze their weapons, armor and skills, to find out who would win a Death Battle. Pikachu (*Cues: The Matter's Settled - Pokémon anime*) Wiz: Standing barely over one foot tall, and weighing less than a newborn baby, Pikachu is the quick-footed electric mouse Pokémon, and the first under the command of Ash, a 10-year old trainer from Pallet Town, because you don't need puberty to travel the world by yourself. “Awwwww!” everyone gushed once everypony got a good look at the electric mouse Pokemon. “Look at it’s chubby red cheeks!” gushed Rarity. “I bet starlight would love to see this!” Twilight said still wondering where her friend/student was. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~where in the world is Starlight Glimmer~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ We find our unlucky mare traveling through the forest with a look of annoyance on her face as she made her way towards the exit that would lead her back home. “Finally i’m almost home,” Starlight said in relief as she walked closer towards her goal. But a large figure, a gray manticore ump out in front of her and much to Starlight’s amazement and annoyance it started to speak. “Halt!” the Manticore bellowed. “Yon interlopers are trespassing on the ancient forest of the Everfree! If ye wish to make it out alive, first, ye must complete seven unworldly quest, each, more difficult than the--” but it’s speech was cut short as a boulder slammed into the mystic beast, courtesy of a annoyed Starlight Glimmer who was glaring daggers at the fool who dared waste her time. “I got your quest right HERE!!!” screamed the mare as she slammed the boulder into the Manticore over and over again. After venting out her anger starlight made her way towards the exit, not caring for the beaten beast that she left behind, and after a short walk Starlight was greeted to the site of the clear blue skies and the luscious green fields. But more importantly she saw the town of Ponyville and the Castle of friendship in the distance. “Finally I’m home.” Starlight said with tears of joy running down her face, and after wiping them away she soon started galloping her way towards her destination. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Boomstick: Pikachu is now Ash's most loyal and trusted companion, but he sure didn't start that way. He was actually, kind of a dick. Then again, if a 10-year old was trying to trap me in a tiny ball and make me fight other creatures to the death, I'd probably fuck him up too. “I could understand that,” said Rainbow Dash. imagining doing the same thing if someone was trying to tame her. Background Height: 0.4 m / 1'4" Weight: 6.0 kg / 13.2 Ibs Ability: Static Pokédex number 25 Dislikes his Pokéball Likes ketchup Can absorb and use more electric power than a normal Pikachu Wiz: Being so small, Pikachu has low stamina and physical strength, but more than makes up for it with speed. However, his EV training was arbitrary and inconsistent. “What?” everyone said, not understanding what Wiz said. Boomstick: EV what now? “Ya what Boomstick said.” commented Rainbow Dash. Wiz: Effort Value training. Every time a Pokémon wins a battle, one of its abilities improve depending upon the opponent. Taking the first seasons of the show into account, we have compiled an estimation of Pikachu's statistics upon reaching his maximum level. By defeating so many Spearow early on, Pikachu's speed is off the charts. Statistics HP: 182 = Below average Attack: 144 = Average Defense: 108 = Below average Sp. Attack: 123 = Average Sp. Defense: 80 = Below average Speed: 291 = Above average “Oh ya! Another speedster!” cheered Dash. “But it suffers by being a glass cannon though,” said Twilight. (*Cues: Pokémon - Champion Red Remix*) Boomstick: The little lightning rat isn't just quick. He's got two incredibly powerful weapons built into his face! Those aren't just rosy cheeks, they're electricity sacks, which he uses for attacks like his trademark Thunderbolt, and when that won't do the trick, he can use the extra-fast Quick Attack to surprise his foes, or Iron Tail, which turns his tail hard as steel. Electro Ball is a projectile that, for some reason, deals more damage the slower an opponent is. But when things get serious, he'll bust out his greatest attack. The Volt Tackle. The group steared in awe as Pikachu starts accelerating at incredible speeds and is enveloped in a golden electric aura as he charges towards and slams against the enemy pokemon which creates a devastating impact. “So cool!” cheered Pinkie Pie. “That was so awesome!” Spike said with a starry eyed look. Wiz: The Volt Tackle strikes with the force of a mouse-powered megaton warhead, but there's a catch. Pikachu receives recoil damage equaling 33% of the total damage dealt. This move cannot be used lightly. “That seems like a very steep drawback,” Rarity commented. Seeing it as a last resort kind of attack. Move Set Thunderbolt Type: Electric (Special Attack) 10% chance of paralyzing target Thunder Type: Electric (Special Attack) 30% chance of paralyzing target Low accuracy Quick Attack Type: Normal (Physical Attack) Increased priority over opponent's attack Iron Tail Type: Steel (Physical Attack) 10% chance of lowering target defenses Electro Ball Type: Electric (Special Attack) Deals more damage to slower targets Volt Tackle Type: Electric (Physical Attack) Deals 33% recoil damage to Pikachu 10% chance of paralyzing target (*Cues: Pokémon - Gotta Catch 'Em All (Orchestra Version)*) Boomstck: Well that's dumb. It's like, "Hey I can kill you, but I'm gonna blow off my arm!" “So it’s more of a last resort move?” Spike asked Twilight who nodded. “It seems like it but Pikachu needs to be careful with the recoil,” Twilight said, thinking the move can make or break the tiny mouse. Ash: That's kinda weird. Wiz: Regardless, Ash's Pikachu is astounding. He's like a living battery, weaponized. Not only can he discharge an enormous amount of power, he can also absorb electricity and use it against his foes. In fact, he can conduct more wattage than any normal Pikachu, making him one of the toughest of his kind. “So he’s a cut above the rest of his kind.” said Applejack, impressed with the little guy. “I know how that feels,” bragged Rainbow Dash, getting a few eye rolls from the group. Feats Strong against flying & water foes Developed Thunder Armor move Developed Counter Shield move Developed spin dodge Beat Drake's Dragonite with help Defeated Brandon's Regice alone Team Rocket's worst nightmare Boomstick: Yeah, but he's got his limits, get too much electricity stored up and BOOM! No more Pikachu. “Eeep!” squeaked Fluttershy. Turning green at the thought of Pikachu exploding. Wiz: It's true. Pikachu is still a tiny mouse Pokémon with very clear limits. And even though he has long since reached his maximum potential, he refuses to evolve into the vastly superior Raichu due to some pretentious excuse of love and acceptance. What a waste of potential, can you imagine how powerful he could be as a Raichu? Weaknesses Small and fragile Little solo battle experience Susceptible to overcharge Poor defenses against ground-based attacks Weak special attacks against dragon, electric, grass, & ground foes Refuses to evolve “I agree! He would be able to eliminate a lot of his weaknesses if he evolved and got stronger,” Twilight afreed. “Wonder why he doesn't after staying in that form for so long?” wondered Spike. “For merchandise?” said a confused Pinkie Pie. Boomstick: But Pikachu's accomplished quite a lot of impressive feats on his own. He's beaten legendary Pokémon and developed new fighting techniques like the Counter Shield and Midair Spin Dodge. He may be the size of a squirrel, but he's one tough fighter. Pikachu: Pikachu! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ The group had to admit for such a little guy, Pikachu was a tough little guy and some ponies like Fluttershy hoped he would win. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Blanka (*Cues: Blanka's theme - Metal Cover*) Wiz: As a child, Jimmy Blanka was a pale-skinned Brazilian boy. That is, until the horrific plane crash... Boomstick: Like "Lost"! “What’s Lost?” asked Spike. “Sounds like something with an interesting setup but with a very disappointing ending,” deadpanned Pinkie Pie. Wiz: Of which he was the sole survivor, stranded in the Amazon. Trapped in an area filled with dangerous predators, he was forced to camouflage himself day and night. After many years of this, his skin absorbed enough chlorophyll to turn a permanent green hue. The group felt bad for Blanka having to go through that at such a young age. “The poor dear…” Rarity said with a sadden voice. Boomstick: Really? I always thought he was just some kind of jungle monster beast guy. Background Height: 1.92 m / 6'3.5" Weight: 98 kg / 217 Ibs Real name: James "Jimmy" Hobbies: Hunting, electrical work Previously pale skinned Friends with Dan & Sakura Survived in Amazon for years Wiz: Despite his appearance, Blanka is actually extremely passive and gentle. However, piss him off and he enters an unstoppable bloodlust. “That’s… extreme,” Applejack said. “Well at least his time in the wild didn’t make him a hostel all the time,” added in Fluttershy. Boomstick: Well, that seems like a pretty drastic change. Wiz: But before he was old enough to fight the predators himself, he was forced to live off of electric eels as his primary food source. After years of this diet, he developed a high resistance to electricity and somehow gained the ability to produce similar electric shocks. “B-but that’s scientifically impossible!” shouted Twilight. “Uh-oh the egg head is cracking again,” said Rainbow Dash. worried that another want it need it situation might happen. Boomstick: Be right back! Getting eels! “No Boomstick NO!” shoutet Pinkie Pie. “Yes Boomstick YES!” cheered Rarity, with a hopeful smile on her face. Wiz: No, Boomstick, it doesn't work like that. Plus, we kind of have a show to do. “Listen to your friend,” begged Fluttershy. Boomstick: Fine, but afterwards, I'm proving you wrong. “Go for it! I’m rooting for you!” Rarity said supportively, but her friends could tell the smile on her face was anything but kind. Wiz: Okay. Blanka eventually found his way to civilization by complete accident, and found a friend in Dan Hibiki, the absolute worst Street Fighter on earth. "I don't know who this Dan is, but he sounds disappointing" Twilight said with a flat look. "He is a disgrace to the color pink." growled Pinkie. (thank whiteoak019 for the joke.) Boomstick: Ahh, Dan, couldn't get any real people friends, so you had to resort to jungle Frankenstein over here. “That’s… pretty sad,” deadpanned Fluttershy in a dry tone. Wiz: After arriving in the city, Blanka entered the second World Warrior Tournament, and discovered he was one of the most agile competitors there, leaping and ducking around his opponents with ease, like a jungle monkey, which is basically what he is. The group was impressed with how agile the burly being was. Boomstick: He uses a self-taught martial art which he learned while fighting...friggin' crocodiles and jaguars, that's what! “Awsome!” Dash and Pinkie cheered with star struck looks in their eye’s. “The poor animals…” whimpered out Fluttershy. Wiz: He has several unique attacks, like the Beast Roll, with which he hurdles through the air like a bullet, obliterating all laws of physics. Twilight’s eyes began to twitch at the blatant disrespect to physics. Move Set Amazon River Run Rock Crusher Electric Thunder Beast Roll Vertical Beast Roll Backstep Beast Roll Boomstick: I dunno which jaguar or crocodile taught him that move, but shit, I want it! That aside, he's also got a few super moves. The Ground Shave Roll is a chargeable spin attack, and with Shout of Earth Blanka can fire off a wave of uncontrollable electric energy. But you really gotta watch out for the Lightning Cannonball, where he rockets forward as spinning ball of electric death. Blanka hits Balrog with Lightning Cannonball. Announcer: K.O.! The group were stunned by the deadly and flashy move and Fluttershy was getting a little worried for Pikachu’s chances at winning. Super Moves Grand Shave Roll Chargeable spin attack Shout of Earth Can electrify the ground or shoot a bolt straight up Lightning Cannonball Electric spin attack Wiz: Blanka is a deadly fighter and obviously an extremely tough survivor. However, his greatest weakness comes from his lack of formal training. In fact, the only training he's ever had was under the tutelage of...guess... Boomstick/everyone: Don't say it... Wiz: Dan Hibiki. Everyone face hoofed at the extreme misfortune of being trained by that loser. Boomstick: That's like anti-training. “That poor son of a gun,” said Applejack, Feeling bad for poor blanka. Weaknesses Preferably docile Susceptible to cold Never won a tournament Only formal training came from Dan Hibiki (the worst Street Fighter character by far.) Wiz: And yet, he has proven his combat skills time and time again. Though he did not win the World Warrior Tournament, he was picked from hundreds to represent Brazil, and through it, rediscovered his mother and hometown. At long last, Blanka had come home. The group shed a few tears of joy when they saw the scene of Blanka hugging his mother after so many years of being separated from each other. Feats Grew up alone in the Amazon Honed skills against predators Found his long-lost family Local hero Represented Brazil in the second World Warrior tournament Immune to most viruses Boomstick: Most terrifying family reunion ever. “Still sweet though,” Rarity said wiping away a few tears. The group smiled warmly as they saw Blanka plays and jumps around with children while he laughs. Wiz: Alright, the combatants are set. Let's end this debate once and for all. Boomstick: It's time for a Death Battllllleeeee! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ On team Pikachu: Fluttershy. Team Blanka: everyone else. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Death Battle (*Cues: Pokémon - Lance Battle Final (Remastered)*) Pikachu and Blanka face each other in a forest, presumably the Amazon. FIGHT! Blanka attacks Pikachu and knocks him backwards. Pikachu then jumps back and attacks him with a Thunderbolt, but no dice. “Uh-oh,” whimpered Fluttershy. Blanka/Rainbow Dash: "Not good enough!" Blanka attacks Pikachu with a Beast Roll, and knocks the electric mouse out of the air and down to the ground, but Pikachu quickly gets back on his feet and charges at Blanka with a Quick Attack, flying by him numerous times and then hitting him head on. “The little guys determin I’ll give him that,” complemented Applejack. “But let’s see how far that takes him,” said Twilight. Pikachu follows it up by quickly jumping back into the air, and starts to spin as he hits Blanka in the head with an Iron Tail. He then charges at Blanka, picks him up and starts to roll him backwards to throw him upwards, only for Blanka to quickly get back down and do the same. “It’s pretty even right now,” commented Spike. However, just before Pikachu hits the ground, Blanka uses his Electric Thunder move to attack Pikachu, but Pikachu retaliates with a Thunder attack. “Nice move but his electricity based attacks aren't doing the full damage against Blanka,” stated Rainbow Dash. (*Cues: Street Fighter IV - Survive the Jungle (Blanka's Theme)*) Blanka is knocked backwards, while Pikachu lands on his feet, and quickly follows it up with another Thunderbolt, but Blanka simply blocks it again and charges at Pikachu with another Beast Roll. Pikachu charges at him as well, but uses the midair spin dodge technique to go right by him. “That was some quick thinking!” awed Rarity, impressed with Pikachu’s quick thinking. Blanka stops rolling, wondering where his opponent went as Pikachu charges up and fires an Electro Ball. Blanka looks through his legs behind him, only to get hit by the attack and fall down. “Yay~!” cheered Fluttershy thinking that Pikachu had just one. (*Cues: Burning Battlefield - Pokemon Anime*) Pikachu gives a peace sign as Blanka jumps back up and rockets forward at Pikachu with a Lightning Cannonball, to which Pikachu attacks back with a Volt Tackle. ‘This is it!’ everyone thought as they saw the two moves collide. The attacks collide and electricity is flying everywhere. The camera zooms in to see both Pikachu and Blanka firmly keeping their attacks going. The group leaned in wondering who would win this battle of power. But soon after, Blanka grabs Pikachu and bites his head off much to Fluttershy’s horror. Blanka then pulls out a blender and puts the rest of Pikachu's body in it. The man-beast drinks what's been made, belches (with a few sparks in it), and then starts scratching his chin. K.O.! The group was stun at the unusual victory. But most of them snapped out of it when they noticed Fluttershy glaring at the screen. “Sugarcube calm down before you do something reckless,” warned Applejack. But her effort was for not, as Fluttershy flew towards the tv, fully intent on breaking it. “GET HER!” screamed Rainbow Dash as everyone quickly dogpiled on the yellow mare and held her down but the usually shy mares strength was proving to be to much for the group. “PLUSHIE!” Spike yelled to Twilight who used her magic to grab the Doomguy plushie and have go in front of Fluttershy and giving her a hug, calming her down and making her hug it back. “Yey. unconditional love,” said the yellow mare as she hugged her Plushie hader. The rest of the group sighed in relief as they all got up and went back to their seats. (thank Alphamon_Ouryuken for the joke.) ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Results (*Cues: Pitch-Black Jungle - Street Fighter IV*) Boomstick: You know, I've always wanted to eat a Pokémon. What? They look delicious! Spike secretly agreed. Wiz: Pikachu may be powerful, but he can't compete with Blanka's ruthless skill. “Blanka just wouldn't give him the breathing room,” Spike stated. Boomstick: Even though Pikachu was clearly quicker on his feet, his attacks had little effect. Blanka can resist the electric attacks, and the Iron Tail's a steel-type move, which, as we all know, is weak against electricity. Pikachu's only option was to outmatch Blanka's physical strength and stamina, which was just too much for the little guy. Fluttershy just held her Plushie closer after thinking about the brutal battle that just happened. Wiz: And despite keeping a clear head, Pikachu rarely shows any exemplary competence or aptitude on his own. Many of his greatest achievements are actually a result of his trainer's quick thinking or downright luck. “If he was able to act more independently he might of won,” Twilight theorized. Boomstick: Everything was going well, until Pikachu lost his head. “Even I found that in poor taste,” commented Pinkie Pie dryly. Wiz: The winner is Blanka. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Boomstick: Next time on Death Battle. Everything was dark and nothing is happening. "Is the tv broken?" Rainbow Dash asks. But before anyone could respond, they started to hear unfamiliar chanting. ???: Kaaaaaaaaaa meeeeeeeeee haaaaaaaaaa meeeeeeeeee- They see the light starting to brighten up as they also see something that is forming a shape but can't make it out clearly enough. ???: HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!! The light burst even brighter and they now see a symbol that is an emerald shape with the letter "S" inside it. The screen fades to white and complete silence. Until the silence was broken by our two host. Boomstick: HOLY FUCKING SHIT! Wiz: OH MY GOD! Boomstick: SOMEONE GET ME A MOTHERFUCKING TABLE TO FLIP! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ “Well that was something,” Spike said, walking over to the box. “Yeah, I’m just glad that nothing bad happened,” Twilight said, looking back at Fluttershy who was hugging her Doomguy plushie. She repressed a shudder at the thought of Fluttershy about to blow up. “Yupper runny. Now let’s see what’s inside….” Pinkie said, moving her hoof to the box as the top moved a bit. Pinkie stopped and tilted her head to the side. “Um, is something wrong?” Fluttershy asked, wondering why Pinkie stopped. “I think the box moved,” Pinkie said, not sure of what was going on. Twilight rolled her eyes and said, “Sure it did, Pinkie. Now can you open the box.” Pinkie was about to say something when Fluttershy few towards the box and slowly lifted the lid. Fluttershy took a look inside as the lid flew off, making her back off a bit. After a moment of waiting, they saw a small yellow and black thing jump out of the box and land in front of Fluttershy. The thing had a pale yellow coat with a black tip ears and a black tail with pink cheeks. It’s tail was black and bent as it moved around. The creature looked around then looked at Fluttershy before walking over to her. Fluttershy’s eyes went wide as the creature stopped a foot in front of her and waved at her. “Chu~” cooed the little creature. Trying to get the young mares attention. Fluttershy picked up the little critter and hugged it as it hugged her back. “What is that?” Rarity asked, confused just like the others. As she said that, the box glowed while Twilight looked inside and saw a thin red rectangular object with a glowing blue center. Picking it up, Twilight looked at it and said, “What’s this?” The object extends and said, “Pichu, the Tiny Mouse Pokémon. A pre-evolved form of Pikachu. Despite their size, Pichu release bursts of electricity that can shock even humans. However, Pichu are unskilled at controlling their electricity, and sometimes release it by accident when surprised, or when laughing and shock themselves.” it explained before folding back up. Fluttershy stopped hugging the Pichu as she looked at it and said, “You’re a pokemon? Yay.” “And this is some kind of device that has information on Pokemon,” Twilight said, before she was hit with a paper ball. Unraveling it, she said, “And it’s called a Pokedex. …...Dibs.” “Seriously, you girls get the good stuff. Please let there be something good in there,” Rainbow said, flying to the box. She was a bit disappointed to find comics, a few mangas and a red hat with goggles on them. “I’ll take the hat, if you don’t mind. I have an outfit that this would go well with this,” Rarity said, picking up the hat and putting it on her head. “Guess i’ll take some more comics,” Rainbow grumble as the rest of them divide the comics and mangas evenly. Pinkie took some of the Pokemon mangas as Rainbow and Applejack took the Street fighter comics and Spike had a few of each. “Well girls, I guess i’ll see you tomorrow for the next episode,” Twilight said, sitting on the couch to try the pokedex. “Alright Twi, we’ll see you later,” Applejack said, walking towards the door. She was just about to open the door when it slammed open causing everyone to jump out of the way or in freight. After their hearts calmed down, they saw their friend Starlight Glimmer standing their with her mane a mess and her coat dirty. “I’m back!” Starlight yelled as her friend all ran to her and gave her a hug. “Starlight, we’re so glad to see you,” Pinkie said, giving her a bear hug. “I figured Pinkie. Now please let me go, you’re starting to hurt me,” Starlight said, feeling the hug starting to hurt. “OK,” Pinkie said, letting go of Starlight and causing her to land on shaky hooves. As Starlight straightened herself up, Twilight walked forward and gently wrapped her hooves around Starlight’s neck while a few tears ran down her face. “I was so worried,” Twilight said, as Starlight returned her hug. “Well I’m back so you don’t need to anymore,” Starlight said, gently nuzzling her friend. After a few moments, Starlight separated and said, “You won’t believe the time I had getting here.” “Um Starlight, why didn’t you just teleport here?” Twilight asked, causing Starlight’s eyes to twitch. “Yeah and why didn’t you fly? You could have gotten here faster than walking,” Rainbow said, causing Starlight’s eyes to twitch even more. Starlight just stood there, twitching violently as her friends were getting worried. “You okay, Starlight?” Twilight said as Starlight just fell to the floor in a twitching mess. With her friend on the floor, Twilight used her magic to lift her up and said, “Let’s get you in a bed,” while walking up stairs to her room. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Chapter end! Next time GOKU VS SUPERMAN!!! Goku vs Superman.“Extra couch,” Twilight said, moving a new couch next to the one they already had. “Check,” Spike said, using a quill to write something on a scroll. “Snack table,” the young alicorn said as she place the last plate of snacks on the table that was placed near the couches. “Check,” the young drake said as he checked another item off the list. “And finally Starlight Glimmer,” the princess of Friendship said, looking towards said mare who was seated in front of the tv. Just now finishing the Pikachu, Blanka battle. Starlight could only laugh at her friend’s little joke as she watched the credits. After that, Starlight got up and said, “I can’t believe I missed this. It must have been fun to watch this with your friends.” Starlight looks at the floor in sadness as she felt something wrap around her back. Looking to the side, Starlight saw Twilight hugging her as she said, “Don’t think like that. You’re here now and we can enjoy them together with OUR friends.” Starlight nods and returns the hug, enjoying the warmth it brought. Suddenly the door slams open as a raspy tomboyish voice said, “We’re here to see some action.” The two mares turned to see Rainbow Dash and the rest of the girls walking through the door as they made their way into the room. “Hey, egghead. What’s with the extra couch and snack table?” Rainbow asked, hovering near the table while looking at the extra couch. “I don’t think we need that for just Starlight.” Twilight chuckles and said, “Not exactly.” “Did you invite somepony over then?” Applejack said, sitting at the end of the first couch. “I’m wondering that too, darling. With Spike either sitting next to you or in his beanbag chair, it doesn’t seem like we need an extra couch for one pony. A seat, maybe,” Rarity said, taking a seat next to Applejack. “We would like to know. If you don’t mind,” Fluttershy said, holding Doomguy Plushie in her hooves. “Well, you see ….I kinda,” Twilight began to say when a bright light filled the room, causing everyone to close their eyes. When the reopened them, they saw the princesses and Shining Armor standing in front of them. “Greetings, my little ponies,” Celestia said as everyone in the room bowed to her. “Please, we’re all friends here.” “What’cha doing here, princess?” Pinkie Pie asked, looking at them curiously. “You here to watch the next battle with us?” Celestia looked to the side, to see Twilight and Cadance do their dance, and said, “That is correct Pinkie. Twilight sent me yesterday, inviting my sister and I to watch the next battle.” “And Twilight send us a letter asking us the same thing. We even got Sunburst to baby sit Flurry Heart while we’re here,” Shining said, getting a hug from Twilight. “When we got the letter, we couldn’t say no.” “Now let us start this battle. I for one would like to see if they’re worthy of being ‘awesome’ as they say,” Luna said, taking a seat on the couch with everyone else doing the same. Twilight levitated the remote in front of her and pressed play. Interlude (*Cues: Invader - Jim Johnston*) (fades...) (*Cues: Goku vs Superman Theme from ScrewAttack's Death Battle - The Synthetic Orchestra*) Wiz: Born to dying races and sent to brave new worlds, these two alien saviors are legendary. The group where getting more and more interested after hearing that. “So it’s going to be a battle of two outworldly being?” asked an excited Twilight as she wondered what this two would bring to the table in this fight. “Huh? That’s funny,” said Spike. “What is?” Cadence asked the young drake. “Well it’s funny, the first episode of the show was about two people from space and now the first season ends with two people from space,” explained the drake. Causing the main group member to think back and realise that he was right. “Giggle! Your right Spiky!” said a giggling Pinkie Pie along with everyone else found amusing as well. Boomstick: And everybody wants to know who would kick whose ass in a fight. And I mean everyone. “This must've been a very sought after fight for the people that this show was made for.” commented Celestia. “It just makes it even more thrilling just thinking about who this two fighter are,” added in Luna Wiz: Goku, the tenacious Super Saiyan... Boomstick: ...and Superman, the Man of Steel. “Those are some awesome titles,” Rainbow said as everyone nodded in agreement. Wiz: To ensure no questions are left unanswered, we will be acknowledging every official resource for both combatants, though the original writings hold precedence. No mistranslations allowed. Also, as he was retconned and rebuilt in 1986, we will be examining the modern Superman. “Why though?” questioned a confused Shining armor. Boomstick: Considering Supe's pre-86 could make up new superpowers on the fly and destroy entire solar systems by sneezing, probably a good idea. He's Wiz and I'm Boomstick. “Uh-oh…” muttered Starlight as she saw her friend/slash treacher’s eye start to twitch at the absurd feats of power. ‘She’s not going to have a good time,’ the mare thought as she hoped this episode would not set Twilight off. Wiz: And it's our job to analyze their weapons, armor and skills to find out who would win... a Death Battle. Title sequence Screwattack presents... in collaboration with: Kanzenshuu Superman homepage The Dao of Dragon Ball SuperSite.com Team Fourstar Starring: "MasakoX" "It'sJustSomeRandomGuy" Animation by Jordan Lange Theme music by Blank Robinson Synthetic Orchestra Written and hosted by Ben Singer and Chad James Directed by Ben Singer Goku vs Superman “This is gonna be awesome~!” sang Rainbow Dash as she dug into her popcorn. Goku (*Cues: Dragon Ball - Makafushigi Adventure Instrumental Theme*) Goku is shown jumping upwards into the air at a stump of wood, then hits it, breaking it into smaller, even pieces of wood. He lands back on the ground while the wood perfectly stacks into a pile. “That was so cool!” cheered Spike wondering if he could do the same thing. “That was quite impressive,” complemented Rarity as the rest of the group also applauded after seeing such skill. Wizard: Kakarot was born to a low-class Saiyan warrior on the planet Vegeta. He narrowly escaped the extinction of his entire race when he was sent to Earth with a single, simple mission… Boomstick: Destroy everything! Then he conveniently bumped his head and forgot about it all. “Well that’s relief…” whispered Fluttershy. “But what kind of barbarians sends children out to kill?” questioned a disgusted Rarity “A baby should never be put through that,” muttered out Cadence as she imagined someone doing that to Flurry Heart. Wizard: Dubbed Goku by his adopted grandfather, his life revolves around combat. He cares little for anything else, unless food is involved. They watch a younger Goku eat a restaurant out of business. Goku: Can I have another bowl, please? (*friends/everyone fall over in shock*) “And I thought Pinkie Pie had an appetite,” muttered a shock Twilight. “Oooh~! I wonder how many cupcakes he could eat?” asked an excited Pinkie Pie. “I’d rather not find out,” muttered Spike feeling that it would take all of the cupcakes in ponyville to even get him half-way full. Background Full Name: Son Goku Birth Name: Kakarot Age: 53 [Body = 45] Height: 175 cm / 5'9" Weight: 62 kg / 137 Ibs Occupation: Radish farmer Masters: Muten Roshi, Korin, Popo, Kami, North Kai, Old Kai (*Cues: DB Raging Blast 1&2 - Ultimate Blast Soundtrack*) Boomstick: At 12 years old, he was trained by Master Roshi in Kame-Sennin Ryu, which pushes a person to superhuman levels. “Hmmm wonder if the royal guards could go through that type of training?” pondered Shining. “I think only my brother could handle that kind of physical labor,” commented Applejack. Training w/ Grandpa Gohan Kung-Fu & basic ki training w/ Roshi [Kame-Sennin Ryu] Intense labor develops superhuman ability w/ Korin Trains endurance & opponent anticipation w/ Kami & Popo Senses, meditation, & precision w/ King Kai Kaio-Ken Advanced ki training & 10x gravity Wizard: Complementing his Saiyan biology, Goku’s superhuman strength, speed and senses skyrocketed. He developed numerous fighting techniques including the fast-moving After-Image and the Dragon Throw, his trademark grapple. “Now those are fighting moves huh AJ?” Rainbow Dash asked her southern friend who only gave her a shrug as an answer. “I’m pretty comfortable with my fighting style,” said the southern mare. Fighting Techniques After-Image (Zanzoken) Dragon Throw Mimicry Rock, Scissors, 'N' Paper (Janken) Fist Shockwave Fist of Eight Hands (Hasshu-ken) Boomstick: At fifteen, he was already so powerful that the only worthy teachers left were gods... and a talking cat, but mostly GODS! He was only a kid and his power level was already enormous! “Talking cat?” said Fluttershy as she imagine a wise cat teaching her and her Doomguy plushie in the ways of martial arts. Vegeta/Pinkie Pie: It’s over 9,000!! Boomstick: Not yet! “Huh?” everyone said, looking confused at Boomstick’s interruption. (*video fast-forwards through the Dragon Ball Z series*) Boomstick: Okay, now it is. Nappa: What?! 9,000?! (*Cues: Dragon Ball Z - Main Theme*) Wizard: FALSE! In the Japanese manga, Goku’s power level at that time was 8,000. But it doesn’t even matter because power levels are absurd. “The entire point of introducing them was to show how unreliable and meaningless they were.” [Kanzenshuu] By relying on power levels, the villains constantly underestimated the heroes. Therefore, using them to judge Goku’s abilities is pointless. Besides, the Daizenshuu says that— Boomstick/Rainbow Dash: Dai-what now? “Even I’m confused,” commented Twilight trying to say the word in her head. Wizard: The Official Dragonball Encyclopedia. It states power levels eventually become immeasurable, not because they are so high they can’t be measured, but because the characters, and hopefully the audience, have realized just how futile these numbers are. “MY FAVORITE MEME IS A LIE!!!” cried Pinkie Pie in total Despair. (thank Alphamon_Ouryuken for the joke.) Raditz: I’m still ten times stronger than you are! Goku: That may be true, but strength isn’t the only thing that matters. “Yes will is another factor as well,” said Celestia as she gave goku approving look. (*Cues: DBZ - The Dragon Theme*) Wizard: We cannot judge Goku by his power level, nor can we through power scaling, the theory that he can achieve the same feats as lesser Dragon Ball characters. Goku’s abilities are tailored to his personal training and experiences, not to mention anatomy. Shows Frieza against Super Saiyan Goku, telling that the planet will blow up. The group shudder when they saw the tyrant for the first time. The cold smile and ruthless look in his eyes put any villain the girls had face to shame. Frieza: I can breathe in space... and you can’t. “(gasp!) But space is a vacum!” cried Pinkie Pie. “Vacuum…” corrected everyone else with a flat tone. Boomstick: However, Goku does have a knack for mimicking ki techniques. Wizard: “Ki is metaphysical, made up of things such as vigor, courage and being in one’s true mind.” [Kanzenshuu] “Sounds like they should be part of the elements,” Rainbow said, imagining a few more elements of harmony. Boomstick: It’s basically a kind of natural life force energy and is a fundamental component of Daoist medicine and martial arts. Oh, and uh, it’s NOT magic! “What!? But how can they do all those things without magic!?” yelled a confused Twilight as she tried to rap her head around the concept of someone not using magic to do those things. Wizard: Dragonball creates a very distinct difference between ki and magic. Ki is dependent on the physical ability of the user. “So i guess earth ponies could learn it,” said shining armor thinking out loud. (*Cues: Dragon Ball Z - Battle Theme*) Wizard: And magic-users like Babidi are clearly using something different. Goku harnesses and manipulates his ki energy— Boomstick: - into badass lasers and stuff, like ki blasts, energy barriers and the Destructo Disc, which he totally stole from Krillin. The Solar Flare blinds opponents and the Spirit Bomb puts energy from other things into a giant death ball... that takes freaking forever to make. “Those attacks look powerful,” Cadance said in awe. “The destructo Disk seems like my kind of attack," said Rarity “I should try the Solar Flare sometime,” Celestia muttered to herself. Unknown to her, Twilight was writing down these attack to see if they can recreate them later. Wizard: And energy taken from sentient beings must be voluntary. The Spirit Bomb is fueled by positive energy which is only effective against those filled with negative energy, AKA evil. In the Super Android 13 film, Goku actually absorbs the ki gathered from the Spirit Bomb, becoming one with it, transforming and manipulating the energy himself. “That attack. We need that attack,” Shining Armor said, imagining it helping them out in the near future. Ki Attacks Ki Blast Destructo Disk (Kienzan) Solar Flare (Taiyo-ken) Ki Barrier Kiai Cannon Spirit Bomb (Genki Dama) Dragon Fist Boomstick: But his two best moves are the Dragon Fist, where he super-charges his punch with a golden ki dragon and the one and only Kamehameha: a giant focused beam which every kid in the world has always wanted to do. Don’t lie, you’ve tried it. “Woah,” Spike, Rainbow and Shining said in complete awe by the Dragon Fist. But everyone had that same reaction when they saw Goku’s signature attack. Kamehameha Means "Turtle Destruction Wave" Concentrates ki into a single point Requires some time to charge Variants Jet - Propels Goku Bending - Directed in midair Super - Planet busting power Twin Dragon Shot - Releases as spheres Continuous - Rapid-fire 10x - Max output in Super Saiyan 4 After-effects blasts victim later Wizard: Goku also uses ki for telekinesis and high-speed flight. He can even sense the power and location of other ki sources and then teleport directly to them with Instant Transmission. “They can teleport too?” Twilight yelled, trying to comprehend how they can do this without magic. Boomstick: Which is light speed! (*Cues: Dragon Ball Z - Prologue & Subtitle II*) Goku: You dematerialize and travel as a mass of light. Wizard: Again, false. This is another mistake in translation. According to the original manga, “Instant Transmission is… well… instant.” [Kanzenshuu] Its only flaw is that it requires concentrated focus. “That’s faster than Rainbow Dash,” Starlight said, amazed at the extent of this technique. “A lot of things are faster than me now a days,” muttered an annoyed Rainbow Dash. “Like your boyfriend?” snarked Applejack, which got Rainbow Dash to yet again grab her notebook and start to write something down. “Ok seriously Dash what is that notebook for,” asked an annoyed Rarity. “Oh this? It’s just my revenge notebook,” answered Rainbow Dash with a shrug which got some confused looks from the guest and a cold chill going down the main group’s spine. “Revenge notebook?” asked a nervous Fluttershy. “Yep! Every time someone teses me about my crush on sonic i write it down and after a while the one who teased me the most will get pranked.” Explained Dash as she gave the group a terrifying grin. ‘Crap baskets,’ everyone else thought. Goku: (in his mind) It’s no good. I can’t concentrate. (*Cues: DBZ: Ultimate Tenkaichi - The Warrior*) Wiz: Also, he can read minds. “Unicorns can’t do that,” Starlight said, having studied a good number of Twilight’s books. Boomstick: Wait, what? Is there no limit to this ki thing? “That's what we would like to know,” commented Cadence, getting a few nods of agreement from the group. Ki Manipulation Telekinesis Flight Ki Sense Instant Transmission (Shunkanido) Telepathy Mind Reading Wizard: There is. Goku draws from a finite pool of ki energy. So to increase his power, Goku perfected the art of Kaio-Ken. This amplifies Goku’s ki, multiplying his strength, speed, defense and so on. “So he needs to be smart with how he uses it,” Rarity said just loud enough for everyone to hear. “It seems so but this Kaio-Ken looks like it could turn the tides of battle if used correctly,” Luna said, liking the technique. Boomstick: Only one problem: it puts a giant strain on his body and can even kill him. Footage from Tree of Might, fighting against Turles. Goku: Kaio-Ken... TIMES TWENTY!! “That needs to be used sparingly then,” Applejack said, knowing what it's like to push herself more than she should. Kaio-Ken Taught by North King Kai Multiplies ki and physical power Too much strain can be fatal Multiplication amount is controlled Goku's highests multiplication: 20x Wizard: But Goku does not have to rely solely on his ki. He wields the Power Pole, “a magical staff which expands and contracts” [Daizenshuu 7]. “And he uses a magical staff?” Twilight said, getting a bit of a headache from this. “One that extends, Twilight. Didn't we have one like that,Sister?” Luna asked, looking at Celestia. “I don’t believe so. Maybe we should check the old armory later and see,” Celestia said, thinking of what they could find in there. Inventory Power Pole (Nyoi-Bo) Indestructible Extends & contracts on command Limitless reach Boomstick: When he’s hurt, eating a Senzu bean heals him up and to get around, he rides the Flying Nimbus, a flying cloud which probably tastes like cotton candy. “Wish I had those beans. Then I wouldn’t have to be in the hospital so much,” Rainbow grunted while crossing her hooves. “You could avoid it if you stop doing your stunts so close to town,” Applejack said cheekily, getting a glare from her daredevil friend. “I so want a cloud like that. I could go anywhere and have a snack at the same time,” Pinkie said, imagining all the adventures she could do. “I doubt it would taste like cotton candy, darling,” Rarity said, trying not to crush Pinkie’s dreams. Flying Nimbus (Kinto-Un) Flies at Mach 1.5 Exclusive to people with a pure heart Senzu Beans Instantly heals wounds & broken bones Restores ki Stored in a belt pouch (*Cues: DBZ - Goku Super Saiyan Theme*) Wizard: Still, the Kaio-Ken was Goku’s trump card for some time until a fateful battle with the tyrant Frieza, who pushed Goku past his limits to achieve the legendary form of Super Saiyan. The group was in awe as they saw Goku turn in the legendary super saiyan form. “I know we saw this form with vegeta and all but the way goku did it was just way cooler,” commented Shining Armor in awe. “Truly a form like that deserve being called legendary!” cheered Luna. Boomstick: There are four different levels of Super Saiyan, each drastically boosting his power. Wizard: Like the Kaio-Ken, each form does burden his body, though Goku has trained to minimize this. The group sighed in relief, happy that Goku was able to master the form. Boomstick: Super Saiyan 3 multiplies the already combined power of Super Saiyan 2 by four, but comes at a horrible price: that hair! Oh, and it pretty much destroys his body while he’s using it, but MY GOD, THE HAIR! “Good gracious!” gasp out Rarity before fainting. Applejack rolled her eyes before shaking her drama queen of a friend awake. Wizard: Fortunately for Goku, the life-sapping Super Saiyan 3 would be trumped by his final transformation: Super Saiyan 4. This form alters his body to better endure the 4000x power increase. “4000x POWER INCREASE!!!” screamed the group while Twilight started to foam at the mouth and started to twitch violently. “Twilight!” screamed a worried Starlight. “ Shouldn’t we help her!?” she yelled at the group. “Meh she’ll be fine.” shrugged Rainbow Dash. “Just give her a moment to calm down,” added Cadence, showing the young unicorn that Twilight’s behaviour was a normal occurrence to the rest of the group. Boomstick: Complete with pink fur and eye shadow. Fear the ultimate form! That got a few chuckles from the group and was even able to calm down Twilight. Wizard: With each transformation, minus full-power Super Saiyan 1, Goku loses some self-control, becoming more violent and instinct-prone. Transformations Great Ape (Ozaru) Base power x 10 Full Powered Super Saiyan Base power x 50 Super Saiyan 2 Super Saiyan 1 power x 2 Super Saiyan 3 Super Saiyan 2 power x 4 Super Saiyan 4 Super Saiyan 3 power x 10 (*Cues: DBZ - Super Saiyan 3 Power Up*) Footage of SS4 Goku facing against one of the Shadow Dragons in GT. Goku: When I’m at this power level, it’s hard for me to listen to reason. I just lose control. “Eeep!” squeaked Fluttershy as she hid behind her doomguy Plushie. “That could lead to some trouble if Goku isn't careful,” commented Celestia with worry in her eyes. Wizard: Goku’s greatest strength is his tenacity and never-give-up attitude. “He does not fight to defeat others. He fights to defeat himself.” [The Dao of Dragonball] However, this may also be his greatest weakness. Boomstick: He prefers a fair fight, eager to see his opponent’s maximum potential. “That’s a bad idea. Letting your opponent power up could lead to one's destruction,” Luna said, shaking her head. King Kai: He’s about to reach his maximum. This could be your last chance. Goku: I want him to reach his maximum. I want to fight him when he’s at his best! “Even I Would rather just finished a bad guy instead of letting him get powered up.” commented Dash, seeing what Goku was doing was stupid. Wizard: But, when the whole world is at stake, well... hindsight is 20/20. Boomstick: And although he’s more than tough enough to survive in a vacuum, he clearly needs oxygen, so no breathing in space. Wizard: Plus, well… Goku’s not very bright. Despite some basic schooling from Roshi, Goku has never had a day of certified formal education in his life. It took him years just to learn how to drive. Boomstick: But why the hell would Goku need to drive a car? “They do look fun,” Shining and Spike said, thinking it would be cool to have those cars in town or the empire. Wizard: Even so, Goku understands his weaknesses. To him, a formal education would just be a waste of time. He is already a genius when it comes to martial arts. “Might as well stick to your strengths i gauss,” said Spike. Boomstick: And even if he does get the hell beaten out of him, he improves with every fight. “Hax! I call hax!” yelled Pinkie Pie. Weaknesses Avoids unfair advantages No formal education Sometimes too forgiving Super forms drain energy Limited amount of ki Wizard: And that is what Goku is all about. He thrives on becoming stronger and bursting limits and has overcome every obstacle in his way. The group felt nothing but respect For Goku. Boomstick: Even marriage. “Awwwww~!” the group awad as they saw Goku and Chichi’s wedding. Wizard: Goku might just be the greatest martial artist in fictional history. The group now sees Frieza bruised and terrified when Goku goes Super Saiyan. The group smiled seeing the once arrogant ruler now terrified. Frieza: What…. What are you?! Goku smirked and said: I am the hope of the universe. I am the answer to all living things that cry out for peace. Frieza is trembling even more at Goku's speech which is now giving the group hope and confidence. Goku: I am protector of the innocent. I am the light in the darkness. I am truth. The volcano is erupting as if to emphasise his point. Goku then erupts in a golden aura with a determined and fearless look on his face and shouts the final part of his speech to the heavens. Goku: Ally to good! Nightmare to you! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ The group were in awe after seeing the warrior known as goku and were now desperate to see how his opponent would stack up. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Superman The group watch in horror as a school bus falls in a nearby river as kids panic and begin to drown. “Someone has to save them!” screamed a panicked Luna and the rest of the group where nearly at the edge of their seats as they saw the children panic and scream. Mrs. Ross: My son was in the bus. the bus is then somehow pulled to shore. The one who saved the kids was a young boy who was wet and the look on his face showed hints of fear for what he did as the kids stare at him in both confusion and hints of fear. “Oh thank Harmony.” sighed Cadance in relief as her husband patted her back soothingly. “That young boy was truly brave to go out of his way to save them,” Celestia said with nothing but respect in her voice. Getting nods of agreement from the others. He saw what Clark did. (*Cues: Smallville Score - Trials*) Wizard: Kal-El was born to a high-class scientist on the planet Krypton. He narrowly escaped the destruction of his homeworld when his father sent him to Earth with the goal of preserving human life. The group now see a infant Kal-El be sent away in a small space shuttle before his home planet explodes into dust due to the unstable core. “So sad…” whimpered a Fluttershy as the rest of the group felt bad for both Goku and Superman. “It really sucks that these guys both lost their homes at such a young age,” muttered Rainbow Dash. Boomstick: Well, what a coincidence… except for the whole saving human life thing. “His father was truly a kind man to wish for his son protect another race of life,” Starlight said with a large amount of respect shining in her eyes. “I’m just glad that we're not seeing another race of creatures that do nothing but conquer other planets.” said Rarity. Still not liking the fact that the Saiyan race sends infants to kill all life on another planet. Boomstick: After landing on Earth, he was found and raised by the Kents, who decided to name him Clark. And weren’t they surprised when they found out he was an alien with superpowers. The group look in awe as they saw a young Clark lift up a truck with no effort at all. “That boy puts Big Mac’s strength to shame,” said Applejack, as she saw the young child’s godly strength. “We’ve only seen that kind of strength with fully grown Miniatures,” gasped out Twilight. Completely in awe seeing a child out muscle one of the most physically gifted races in their world. Wizard: After discovering his true heritage, Clark refused to accept his Kryptonian side. He subconsciously developed mental barriers that blocked him from attaining his full power, which he would work to uncover throughout the rest of his life. “It must have been hard to accept that you were an alien and not a human,” Starlight said, feeling sorry for the boy. To know you’ve been living a lie your whole life can cause anypony emotional stress. Background Alternate Identity: Clark Joseph Kent Birth Name: Kal-El Age: 39 Height: 6'3" Weight: 225 lbs. Married to Lois Lane Occupation: Pulitzer Prize winning Investigative Reporter Boomstick: Stupid power-limiting brain. Wizard: After graduating college in two years and traveling the world as a secret superhero, Clark moved to the city of Metropolis as an investigative reporter and donned the red and blue to publicly announce his presence as the Superman, defender of truth, justice and the American way!... until he renounced his American citizenship. “He still protects them. At least he does that,” Spike said with everyone nodding in agreement. Boomstick: Mild-mannered Clark kept his identity a secret with the brilliant disguise of nerdy glasses and wimpy demeanor... Superman, as Clark Kent, opens a bottle of champagne, but spills it. Clark Kent: Oh, I'm sorry! I'm sorry! Boomstick: ...proving that people only see what they want to believe. Wizard: Boomstick, that’s surprisingly profound. “Yes it is,” Cadance said with her aunts and husband looking shocked. “He does this sometimes,” Twilight said, her eyes wide. “How can he be smart enough to say things like that, yet sound like a disgusting pig?” Rarity muttered to herself, getting surprised from Boomstick’s explanation. Boomstick: *burps* Since then, his power’s been pretty inconsistent, mostly due to the writers doing whatever the hell they please. Rarity hmmped while sticking her nose up. “Wonder what they mean?” Celestia said, intrigued by the Man of Steel’s powers. (*Cues: Christopher Drake - All-Star Superman*) Wizard: Well, there is a legitimate explanation. Superman’s powers are dependent on the ultra-solar rays of the sun. By absorbing yellow or blue sunlight, his power rises; however he cannot absorb sunlight from a red star. So, if “you take away a yellow sun, you slowly take away Superman’s powers.” [Superman Super Site] Power Source Solar Radiation Constant Power Absorption Healing Factor Yellow Sunlight increases power (2700x-5500x) Red Sunlight has no effect (2700x) Blue Sunlight doubles increase (5500x; adds new abilities) Boomstick: He’s solar-powered! They call him the world’s first superhero but sounds more like the world’s first hippie to me. That got some snickers from the less mature members of the group while the rest just rolled their eyes. Wizard: Now, the intensity of solar radiation disperses the further away it gets from its source, so the closer Superman is to the sun, the more solar radiation he’ll absorb. “Sounds like your kind of hero dear sister,” teased Luna getting a playful shove from her sister. Boomstick: So he gathers more power the higher he gets? He IS a hippie. This brought on more laughter as some of the mature members rolled their eyes but chuckled. Wizard: In the Justice League series, Our Worlds at War, Superman actually spent fifteen minutes INSIDE the sun. When he resurfaced, he was powerful enough to effortlessly move planets. “HE DID WHAT?” Twilight asked as her hair began to ruffle up. “He spent fifteen minutes inside the sun,” Celestia said in a small voice. “We wouldn’t stand a chance against him,” Rainbow said as everyone shuddered at the thought of fighting Superman. Boomstick: He can also hear sounds millions of miles away, see through anything but lead, and spot things moving faster than light. Wizard: He can see at a subatomic level and hear through the vacuum of space… somehow. At this point Twilight was becoming a twitching mess. (*Cues: Justice League: Crisis on Two Earths - Opening Credits*) Wizard: He can even see your soul. Boomstick/everyone: What?! Wizard: It happened. Super Sense Super Hearing X-Ray Vision (with the exception of lead) Telescopic Vision Microscopic Vision Electro Magnetic Spectrum Vision Theta Vision (can see a person's aura) Boomstick: Well, weird abilities aside, Superman can freeze his enemies in ice or create hurricanes just by breathing, and to top it all off, he shoots laser beams from his eyes. “So cool! I want a laser face too!” cheered Pinkie Pie while the rest of the group was stunned silent from the SMALL list of powers in Superman’s arsenal. Wizard: His heat vision can be expanded to encompass anything within Superman’s sight and reach temperatures hotter than the sun. “Hotter than the sun…” muttered everyone, scared at the thought someone could launch an attack of that power with such ease. Boomstick: He can incinerate entire planets in a staring contest. “How can somepony have so much power!?” cried Spike in total disbelief. Wizard: However, “heat vision drains his power faster than any other ability.” [Superman Homepage], especially when he amps it up. Superman creates a huge beam of heat vision, taking out an army of Doomsday-like creatures. “... I think i just peed a little,” Squeaked Rainbow dash in fear. “I think we all did,” muttered Shining Armor. Wiz: And with precision, heat vision can reach microscopic levels invisible to the human eye. Powers Flight Super Strength Super Speed Healing Factor Super Breath Arctic Breath Heat Vision (Maximum Temperature: Unknown; drains solar power quickly) Superman: Heat vision, focused through your pupils like a scalpel… instant lobotomy. Superman slaps Manchester Black. “HA!” laughed everyone. (*Cues: Superman: The Animated Series - Main Theme*) Wizard: Superman can vibrate his body fast enough to phase through attacks, even turn invisible. By vibrating to just under light speed, Superman can use the infinite mass punch. This speed causes the relative mass of his fist to increase immensely and hit with the force of a supernova. At this point Celestia was in the same state as her former student after hearing some of the things superman can do. “Impossible…” muttered the two was they slowly turn into a twitching mess. “Ok is that normal?” asked a concern Starlight. “No but it’s quite fascinating,” answered Luna as she poked her twitching sister with a stick. Infinite Mass Punch Acceleration to near light speed creates relativistic mass Impact equivalent to 10 Octillion Megatons Uses a lot of energy Planet busting Speed force regulates durability if necessary, ensuring survival Boomstick: Which explodes at a force of 10 octillion megatons! Thanks fact-of-the-day calendar. Wizard: In comparison, this is the Tsar, the most powerful bomb mankind has ever tested: 50 megatons. Boomstick: So that punch is like 200 septillion super-nukes. That’s 24 zeroes, bitches! “Too many ZERO’S!!!” screamed an over dramatic Pinkie Pie. (*Cues: Superman Doomsday - Main Title*) Wizard: Superman is not only strong, but a genius with a super-brain that can process information thousands of times faster than an average human. He is capable of strategic fighting, even while traveling eight times the speed of light. “W-what!?” stuttered out Rainbow Dash. Genius Intellect Super Brain Perfect Photographic Memory Technological Genius Master Tactician Can read & memorize DNA Taught all remaining Kryptonian knowledge by Jor-El Boomstick: He’s an expert in disabling opponents through pressure point combat and once fought demons in Valhalla alongside Wonder Woman and Thor… for 1,000 freaking years! Everyone was stunned at that tidbit of information. “That is the coolest thing i’ve ever heard… of all time.” muttered out an awe struck Starlight. Wizard: He’s even learned to protect his mind from telepathic attacks. Superman: I heard your telepathic shout before, but my mind is protected from anything deeper by a series of psychic blocks. Manchester Black: Best I’ve seen, too. Wizard: He also studied two Kryptonian martial arts: Torquasm-Rao and Torquasm-Vo. Boomstick/Rainbow Dash: Orgasm-what now? “Oh my!” gasped out fluttershy with redden cheeks. Wizard: Torquasm-Rao is a hard martial art in which Superman enters the theta state, a real-life phenomenon in which a person becomes extremely receptive to information and instinct. Torquasm-Vo is a mental martial art with which Superman can fight off mind domination and illusions or even counterattack. “Now that's something i would like to learn,” said Spike. Wondering how strong he’d be if he mastered those skills. Boomstick: In order to master all his powers, Superman needed to break through his own self-created mental blocks, like how when he was younger, he believed he needed to eat food and breathe oxygen like humans, when he can really just survive on solar energy alone like some weird plant man. “I think we’ve found your perfect match aunty Celestia,” giggled out Cadence. Getting a few rounds of laughter from the rest of the group even Celestia herself couldn't help but laugh as well. Wizard: And thanks to some intense training from Mongol II, he managed to tear these barriers down and become the true Superman, capable of amazing feats. Boomstick: Yeah, like when he obliterated an F5 tornado with a round of applause... Martial Arts Pressure Points with Batman Hand to Hand with Wonder Woman Boxing with Wildcat Psychic Barrier with J'onn J'onzz With Mongol II (worked to uncover full potential) Torquasm-Rao & Torquasm-Vo (enhances and protects body and mind) (*Cues: John Williams - Superman Theme*) Boomstick: Or when he was the filling for a planet sandwich, or held a mini black hole in his hand... oh, or the time he dragged the freaking Earth around. Superman has survived some pretty crazy things. Like when Koldgast hit him with 15 supernovas to the face. “i-but-HOW!?” screamed Twilight in a fit of frustration. Koldgast: That was like 15 suns exploding in his face! Boomstick/Pinkie Pie: I/He just said that! Wizard: Exaggeration? Maybe, but he has survived other supernovas before. When he takes a hit, his super-dense molecular structure and bio-electric aura protects him and his suit. “Hmph! Wish I had an aura that protected me and my wonderful dresses from harm,” commented a frustrated Rarity. “Then ya should've been born in Remnant then!” said Pinkie Pie, completely breaking the fourth wall in the process. Boomstick: Holy crap, he sounds invincible! “He truly does,” said a intimidated Luna. (*Cues: Superman/Batman: Public Enemies - Opening Theme*) Wizard: Not exactly. His solar energy can be depleted over the course of a battle, if he takes too much damage or remains out of sunlight for too long. This is how the monster Doomsday was able to kill him. Oh, sorry, not kill, put him into a “healing coma”. Boomstick/Pinkie Pie: (*coughs*) Cop-out! Wizard: He also has several specific weaknesses, like the famous Kryptonite, radioactive fragments of his homeworld which bring him to his knees. “Any prolonged exposure will eventually kill him.” [Superman Super Site] He also has no special resistance to magical attacks. “Those seem like major weaknesses,” commented Applejack. Boomstick: And he always gets all hung up on doing the right thing, even if it makes his life miserable. Wizard: He does not fight for himself, but to protect others. Even the buildings in Metropolis are more valuable to him than his own life… (Superman punches Captain Marvel to the hospital, the building crumbling down) most of the time. The point is, Superman spends more time defending the city than actually improving his own abilities. (after they show Superman damaging the city during a fight) "Wow, reckless much?" commented Rainbow Dash, getting a flat look from Twilight. "Big talk considering what happens when you're not paying attention while you're flying." deadpanned Twilight with a flat look directed at the blue mare. “Shots fired!” gasped out Fluttershy. Rainbow Dash smirked at Twilight "Oh hi pot, my name is kettle, cast any “want-it, need-it" spells lately?" she snarked back. Causing everyone else to stare wide eyed at the the blue mare. “... gonna need a Senzu for that one,” muttered a wide eyed Pinkie Pie. (thank Alphamon_Ouryuken for the joke.) Weaknesses Reliant on constant solar radiation Kryptonite (severely weakens muscles, eliminates stored solar power) Magic (includes enhanced weapons) Spends more time protecting others than improving skills Boomstick: But remove all those pesky feelings about saving people and look out! They see Batman struggling to hang on to a powerful god-like being named Darkseid who effortlessly gets Batman off of him and throws him into the ground. Darkseid: Can't you see that it's hopeless? Suddenly, Superman flies towards him and punches him into the wall and grabs his throat. Superman: That man (Batman) won't quit as long as he can still draw a breath. None of my teammates will. Me? I got a different problem. Superman starts pummeling Darkseid against a wall which is slowly giving in with each punch. Darkseid is now punched out of the wall and is now outside. He slowly gets up and sees Superman walking towards him. Superman: I feel like I live in a world made of cardboard. Always taking constant care not to break something. To break someone. Never allowing myself to lose control or someone could die. Darkseid tries to punch him but Superman blocks it and counters with his own punch which sends him back even further. Superman: But you can take it, can't you big man? What we have he is a rare opportunity for me to cut loose and show you just how powerful I really am. Wiz: alright, the combatants are set, let's end this debate once and for all. Boomstick: It's time for a Death Battttlllleeee! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ On team Goku: Rainbow, Dash Pinkie Pie, Spike, Luna, Fluttershy. On team Superman: Twilight, Starlight, Rarity, Applejack, Shining Armor, Cadence, Celestia. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Death Battle Just an average day in Metropolis. Man: Look! It's a bird! Man 2: It's a plane! What they see is a plane with a damaged wing flying towards them. Man: It's gonna kill us! “Well that escalated quickly,” muttered Cadence. Everyone starts to panic and run away. Man 3: I hate Mondays! “So does a certain orange cat,” grinned Pinkie Pie. Superman flies in, then sees to the plane. Superman: *humming Superman theme* Don't worry, folks, this looks like a job for Super -- WHOA! The plane nearly hits a nearby window cleaner. “Watch it!” hissed out Twilight. Superman: I got it! I got it! (*Cues: Earth Music - Dragon Ball Z*) Then it switches to a news reporter, who talks about Superman's heroics. At the Kame House, Goku's friends are watching it on TV. News reporter: Earlier today, Superman heroically rescued Metropolis from disaster once again. The man of tomorrow saved a downed airliner which would've crashed- Krillin: Superman, huh? Wow, he looks really strong. Vegeta: What, that pretty boy ass clown? Oh please. I could kill him with my eyes closed... even faster than that stupid transforming hedgehog. “Glad to see the prince hasn't changed one bit,” remarked Luna with an amused look as the rest of the group chuckled at her comment. Chi-Chi: Just look at him... wearing his underwear on the outside. I bet it chafes... “I have to agree with her it does look uncomfortable,” muttered Rarity. Goku: Don't be so sure... Chi-Chi then looks out a window at Goku, who is outside looking at the water. (*Cues: Goku & Gohan In The Time Chamber - Dragon Ball Z*) Goku: I sense him. He's strong... stronger than anyone I've ever fought. Chi-Chi: Are your serious? Goku then happily picks up Chi-Chi. Goku: Finally... someone as strong as me! Vegeta: (off-screen) SCREW YOU!!! The group couldn't help but laugh at the Saiyan prince’s outburst. Goku holds up Chi-Chi while spinning in a circle as the two of them laugh. “Awwww~!” everyone said as they watched the heartwarming scene. Master Roshi: I heard he's an alien! Goku: An alien? Goku, shocked at the news, accidentally lets go of Chi-Chi, who flies off-screen. “Bye Chi-Chi~!” sang Pinkie Pie as the rest of the group looked in stunn silence as they saw Goku’s wife fly off screen. Goku: It's only a matter of time before he destroys the planet! “Umm Goku buddy I think you might have the wrong idea,” said a nervous Shining armor. Goku then gears up for battle. Goku: Nimbus! Goku then flies off on his Nimbus from his current location to Superman. (*Cues: Superman: The Movie - Prelude and Main Title March*) In Metropolis, Superman is standing on top of the Daily Planet when he hears the nimbus coming from a far distance. He then turns and sees Goku riding the Nimbus, who stops and turns to face him. Goku: Hey there. Superman: Uh... hello. Goku: You look pretty strong. Let's fight! “T-that’s one way to start a fight I guess,” muttered a dumbfounded Starlight. Superman: Fight? Well, that's not really what I do... (*Cues: Hand in Hand Fight - Dragon Ball Z: Budokai 2*) Goku then charges up a ki blast and fires it at Superman, who knocks it away. Superman then flies forward, knocking Goku off the Nimbus. Both then land onto the streets below. Goku: Oh boy! This is gonna to be fun! Superman: You're insane! “No… just really likes a good fight,” muttered Rainbow Dash. FIGHT! Goku flies forward and punches Superman, then proceeds to go on the offensive, forcing Superman to block his blows until Goku teleports behind him and kicks. Goku then jumps onto the side of a building and flies at Superman, who punches him so hard that he flies through multiple buildings. Superman then flies after him and delivers a fast combo on Goku, knocking him to the ground. Superman: You're outmatched! Give up! (*Cues: Goku Battles - Dragon Ball Z*) Goku then use his Kaio-Ken technique. Goku: Kaio-Ken! Superman: Kaio-what? (*grunts*) “HA! Classic,” laughed Pinkie Pie. Goku punches Superman into the air, flies after him, kicking him further back, then fires another ki blast, which nearly knocks Superman to the ground. Goku then lands to the ground and fires a large volley of ki blasts at Superman. Superman: Uh huh. “It’s kind of intimidating how unimpress he seems with Goku’s attack,” muttered Applejack. Superman uses his super-speed to evade all of them, then suddenly strikes Goku, stunning him. He then proceeds to deliver a large flurry of blows to the dazed Goku before his final strike sends Goku into a wall, paralyzed. (*Cues: Superman Returns - Chip Off Old Block*) Goku: Wha... what? I... I can't move... Superman: So... you're an alien too, huh? Goku: What did you do to me?! Superman: Pressure points. Didn't work at first, but my X-ray and Microscopic vision let me find your body's weak points. “That’s scary,” whispered Fluttershy. As Superman continues talking, Goku uses telekinesis to lift up a Senzu upward to his mouth from a pouch full of beans. “Hey aren't those…?” asked Spike. “SENZU BEANS!” yelled Pinkie Pie. Superman: You won't be going anywhere... what is that?! Goku then eats the Senzu bean, recovering him from his paralysis, then floats as he holds the bag in his hand. Goku: Ah... Senzu bean! Want one? Superman: No. (*Cues: Superman Returns - Drop In The Bucket*) Superman incinerates the bag with his heat vision. “Now that was just plain rude,” commented Cadence. Superman: I'm ending this... now! Superman flies towards Goku to punch him, but his punched is stopped by Goku's hand as he becomes Super Saiyan. Superman: What?! “You're in trouble now blue boy! Cheered Rainbow Dash Goku then unleashes a massive combo on Superman, eventually side kicks him far back. Superman: Okay Blondie! What's going on?! “Big trouble if you don’t finish the fight quickly,” said Celestia. Goku flies towards Superman, whose attack he anticipates, but when Superman strikes, Goku suddenly disappears. Realizing that Goku was behind him, Superman prepares another punch, but is interrupted by Goku's. Goku: I... am Son Goku! Goku punches Superman into the air. Goku: And I... Goku flies upward towards Superman. Goku: ...Am a Super Saiyan! Goku punches him downward, with Superman crashing back-first into the top of a building. Goku then prepares his Kamehameha Wave. (*Cues Goku's Super Saiyan theme*) Goku: Kame... Hame... Haaaaaa!!! “AWESOME!!!” cheered Rainbow Dash. Goku's Kamehameha Wave blasts through what turns out to be the LexCorp building, blowing it up. Afterwards, Superman still stands in the rubble unscathed. “T-that didn’t even leave a scratch on him,” stuttered out Luna in fear. Superman: Well... this might take a while... (*Cues: Superman Returns - Kryptonite*) Suddenly, Superman begins feeling weak, due to a piece of Kryptonite left over from the remains of LexCorp. “Of all the places for that stuff to be!” groaned out Shining Armor while his wife patted him on the shoulder. Superman: What? *groans in pain* No... not now... Goku flies in to attack, but then notices that something is wrong. Goku: Huh? Goku then lands to the ground. Goku: Hey, what are you doing? “Dying,” whimpered out Fluttershy, feeling bad for the man of steel. Superman: I... no... Goku: Is that rock hurting you? Superman: Kryp... tonite. *groans in pain* Goku then charges up a ki blast and then proceeds to fire it at the Kryptonite, destroying it. The group smiled at Goku for giving up an easy win to have a fair fight. Goku: There. Okay, let's go. Superman: What... why? Goku: I wanna beat you at your best. It's no fun if it's not fair. Superman: Gee, thank... In the middle of his thanks, Goku kicks Superman into the air. “HAHAHAHAHA!” laughed most of the group. Afterwards, Goku and Superman are clashing at super-fast speeds across the entire city. His final strike knocks Superman back and then Goku proceeds to leap forward using two buildings, knocking Superman towards the ground. (*Cues: DBZ Budokai 3 - Twist Of Fate*) Goku then charges at Superman on foot, using his After-Image Technique to create illusions of himself, who run in a circle around Superman. Unfazed, Superman walks forward and punches, knocking Goku back. The two then zip across the city, trying to catch each other, until Superman sneaks up on Goku, hitting him with a car. “Ouch!” winced Applejack. “I’d say that was game if it wasn't for the fact Goku has faced worst,” commented Starlight. Superman: Next time, watch your blind spot. Goku then goes Super Saiyan 2, destroying the car. Superman: Huh... déjà vu. Goku fires more ki blasts at Superman, who takes them out by using his heat vision. Both fly past each other as Superman uses his heat vision, managing to hit Goku's back. “It’s the unstoppable force vs. the immovable object with this two,” muttered Twilight in awe. (*Cues: Superman Returns - Rough Flight*) Superman then rips out a lamp post from the ground and hits Goku with it, knocking him into the air. Goku then takes out his power pole and sees the lamp post flying towards him. He swings the pole, knocking the lamp post away, then proceeds to fly towards Superman and unleash a combo on him utilizing it, knocking Superman back. Superman: That... feels... like... Goku: Power Pole extend! Superman is suddenly struck by the expanding power pole, which forces him into the side of a building. Goku then flies at him with a punch, knocking Superman through the building. Superman: *groans* Magic. “Go magic!” cheered the magic users in the room. Goku: The game's not as fun when you're losing, is it? Superman: Game? You think this is a GAME?! I haven't even begun to play. “Ok superman is getting scary now,” muttered Spike, not liking how angry the man of steel was getting. “Oh he just need a party to cheer him up,” suggested Pinkie Pie. Superman then flies into the air and flies off into the distance. Goku then focuses, anticipating where Superman will fly to, then uses Instant Transmission. (cue Hyperbolic Time Chamber theme) He arrives at a wasteland from the opposite side of the world, where he takes his Power Pole back out, then swings it downward while expanding its size, which hits the flying Superman, knocking him back. Goku then swings his extended Power Pole, which Superman catches with his hand. Superman then slams Goku into the ground with it, then throws the Power Pole far out of the atmosphere. Goku then transforms into Super Saiyan 3. “Oh dear sweet Celestia! That hair!” scream Rarity as soon as she laid eye’s on Goku’s new look. “Not the power pole!” criad Twilight, wanting to see more at the unique item. (*Cues: Buu Is Fighting - Dragon Ball Z*) Superman: Oh great. Not another... Superman is interrupted by a punch from Goku, who then delivers a flurry of kicks, and finishes by using his Dragon Throw, grabbing Superman by the legs. He spins, repeatedly knocking Superman into the ground, before throwing him, destroying an entire large rock formation. Superman then flies at Goku on the offensive, with Goku blocking a flurry of punches. Goku: (thinking) He can even keep up with Super Saiyan 3. What makes him so strong? “Years of writers doing whatever they want?” suggested Pinkie Pie. Goku teleports and places his hand on Superman's head, trying to read his mind. Superman: Attacking my mind, huh? He knocks Goku back, then strikes him a few times, knocking him into the air, finishing by knocking Goku to the ground, creating a crater. Goku sees Superman about to fly towards him. Goku: Solar Flare! The screen goes bright, but Superman is unfazed, holding Goku by the throat. Superman: My turn... “Nothing seems to faze him,” whispered a intimidade Celestia. Feeling completely outclass by both fighters. Superman creates a huge beam of heat vision, intending on ending the fight right there. But then a strange deformity begins occurring around him. Superman: I've got a bad feeling about this... The deformity then begins to conclude, ending with the day turning to night and Super Saiyan 4 Goku appearing before him as lightning strikes in the distance. Superman: Here we go again... Goku: It's over Superman! No one is stronger than Super Saiyan 4, my ultimate form! Superman: Ultimate form, huh? About time you ran out of hair styles... “Snrk! Ok I got to give the big blue boy scout this, that was good one,” snickered Rainbow Dash. Both begin floating upward, then finally fly towards each other. The two clash at unprecedented speeds before Goku does a two-leg kick, knocking Superman down. “This is getting crazy,” shouted Luna as she traid her hardest to keep up with the two fighters. “This puts as my fight with tirake to shame…” muttered Twilight as she now felt like a little filly compared to the two warriors in front of her. (*Cues: Super Namek Theme - Dragon Ball Z*) Superman then uses his freeze breath to try to halt Goku in his tracks, but Goku manages to make it through and delivers a few kicks that knock him into the ground. Instantaneously, Goku teleports towards Superman, then places his hand by Superman's face as he fires off a ki blast. Superman then begins to reach his limits. At this point the group where at the edge of their seats and those like Pinkie Pie and Rainbow Dash where going through snakes as they kept their full attention on the screen. (*Cues: Ginyu Transformation Theme - Dragon Ball Z*) Superman: Don't have much left in me. Have to get above those clouds... “That’s right! Because of the storm clouds caused by Super Saiyan 4 Superman has been cut off from his power source!” exclaim Twilight. “That means Goku has a chance!” cheered Spike and Pinkie Pie. Superman flies upward, intending to leave the planet for the sun. Goku sees this and chases him. “Go Superman!” shouted Team Superman hoping that the man of steel can get to past the clouds. Goku: Oh no you don't! “Nooo! Stop him Goku!” orders Rainbow Dash. Superman then exits the earth towards the sun as Goku flies upward while preparing a Kamehameha. Goku: Ka... me... Ha... me... Haaaaaaa!!! Goku fires his 10x Kamehameha, as Superman turns and fires a huge blast of heat vision towards him. The two beams are at a near-standstill. “Ha! Superman got’s this!” cheered Cadence. Goku: Kai… “... no,” muttered Twilight and Starlight. Goku: O… “No,no,no!” growled out Celestia and Shining armor. Goku: KEEEEN!!! “NONONONONONO BUUUCK!!!” screamed Luna as the rest of team Superman saw what was going to happen soon. Goku's Kamehameha Wave then overpowers the heat vision, pushing back Superman into the sun. Goku then reverts back to his normal form, exhausted. Goku: *breathes heavily* Phew. That's... it. Good... fight. As Goku prepares to fly back to Earth, he suddenly sense his opponent. (*Cues: Goku's Spirit Bomb - Dragon Ball Z*) Goku: *gasp* Wait... he's... there's no way... he's still alive! It's... it's the Sun. He's using the Sun. But I'm... I'm drained. “Oh no…” whispered Fluttershy as she held her Doomguy Plushie closer. Goku then raises his hands upward. Goku: Sun! Lend me your energy! As Goku is creating a Spirit Bomb, Superman is inside the sun, absorbing its energy. As Superman begins to exit the sun, Goku goes Super Saiyan and absorbs the Spirit Ball's energy. (*Cues: The Fortress Falls - Smallville*) Goku then uses this energy to create a large fiery beam of ki energy, which Superman flies towards. With his power near its maximum, Superman flies straight through the beam and slams Goku into the core of the planet. Goku then goes Super Saiyan 4 and flies towards Superman with one last attack. Goku: Dragon... FIST! “GO GOKU/SUPERMAN!!!”both teams screamed as they saw the the very planet itself fall apart before this two power houses. Superman then prepares his infinite mass punch as the two connect. The two opposing forces are so powerful that the entire Earth is obliterated in an instant. Goku shouts as he is destroyed by the Infinite Mass Punch as the screen goes white. Superman is shown floating in space, appearing lifeless. Then thanks to the sun's energy, Superman opens his eyes, having survived. K.O.! Superman flies away as Goku's boot is shown floating in space and its being over to next season. “... this is going to cause some flame wars,” muttered Pinkie Pie. Results (*Cues: Superman Theme (Metal Version)*) Boomstick: It’s over! It’s finally over! We never have to hear about it again! Wizard: Indeed. Superman may not be as tenacious as Goku, but sometimes, tenacity only prolongs the inevitable. Boomstick: Superman’s powers insane. He can even patch up holes in reality with just his own static electricity. “WHAT!?” screamed Twilight as soon as she was able to shake off the shock from the battle. Wizard: Goku did not understand Superman’s connection to the sun and would not think to teleport him to a red star. Even if he did figure it out, he would run the risk of teleporting him to a blue star, which actually increases Superman’s power. “Not like supes needed it anyway…” muttered Spike. Boomstick: And if Goku destroyed the sun, the supernova would blast all the way past Mars and incinerate him. “There was no real way to win,” muttered Rainbow Dash. Wizard: So it ultimately comes down to who is stronger, faster and tougher. STRENGTH Wizard: The force needed to move an object out of the sun’s orbit by 1% is about one thousand times less than the object’s mass. The Earth weighs in just under 6.6 sextillion tons. This means that Superman is strong enough to move 6.6 quintillion tons. Boomstick: But since his solar power can rise infinitely, this is nowhere near his maximum strength. Scientist: You’re lifting 200 quintillion tons. That’s three times your record. The group could only look in stun silence at the redicuise show of strength. SPEED Wizard: While being timed by Max Lord, Superman flew to the sun and back in less than two minutes. That’s 9.4 billion km/h. “Holy buck,” muttered a Rainbow Dash. Boomstick: Not to mention he was fighting Wonder Stripper the whole time. Rarity just gave a frustrated sigh at Boomstick’s nickname for Wonder Women. Wizard: True, so it’s likely he can go faster. According to Batman, he can fly at least 17 billion km/h. At this point Rainbow Dash had just decided to accept that she was no longer the fastest. Boomstick: And nobody argues with Batman! “Agreed!” Luna quickly Agreed. DURABILITY Boomstick: The Man of Steel can survive the impact of multiple supernovas, each with about ten octillion megatons of force. (*Cues: Yobi Samasa Re Ta Toshi - Dragon Ball Z: Burst Limit*) Wizard: So, Superman’s feats and skills are definitively measured. However, Goku’s are not and are difficult to judge. Not only does Dragonball heavily abuse cinematic time, but Goku’s final adventures in Dragonball GT are incredibly inconsistent due to his untimely transformation into a child. From the wish from Pilaf from the black-star dragonballs, accidentally turned Goku from an full-grown Saiyan to a Saiyan child. Goku: Wow, the room got a lot bigger somehow. “Is there anything this Dragon balls can’t do?” asked Starlight, wondering if this things had a limit. “Not sounding really inappropriate?” suggested Pinkie Pie. Wizard: As ki is dependent on the physical body, his child form likely could not handle his own ki, sending his power into flux. Goku: It can't take it. It's too weak. My older body was more developed. Boomstick: And obviously, we’re not using future Goku ‘cause that would require a ridiculous amount of assumptions. Not to mention we’d have to use future Superman, who’s pretty much God. So, like Superman, we need to judge Goku in his prime. “Makes sense,” agreed Twilight. Wizard: After experimenting with dozens of different theories, we discovered an iron-clad method to finding Goku’s limits, which we call the Gravity Formula, based around his training in increased gravity. Due to his style of training and Saiyan heritage, Goku increases his abilities proportionate to the amount of force he trains under. King Kai: Saiyans are born with the unique ability to fight anywhere. “This Saiyans were truly a powerful race,” complemented Luna with a large amount of respect in her eyes. Wizard: While in base form, Goku could lift just under 40 tons. This is equivalent to 586x normal Earth gravity, which we will use in the Gravity Formula along with the Super Saiyan multipliers to calculate Goku’s maximum potential. “Oh joy… more math,” muttered Rainbow Dash. “Oh joy Math!” cheered Twilight as she clapped her hooves in excitement. STRENGTH (*Cues: DB Raging Blast 1&2 - Ultimate Blast Soundtrack*) Boomstick: Multiplying the 40 tons by the Super Saiyan forms means he can lift up to 160,000 tons in Super Saiyan 4, strong enough to pick up a continent... or my ex-wife. Ha ha! “... dammit Boomstick,” muttered Rarity, getting real sick of his jokes. SPEED Boomstick: Right after Goku trained on King Kai’s planet, which has gravity 10x stronger than Earth's, he flew across Snake Way Road as fast as possible to save his friends. It took him 28 hours, impressive since that’s 1,000,000 kilometers long. “I’ll say!” said an impressed Rainbow Dash. Wizard: Except it’s filled with curves and Goku flew straight over it, so how far did he actually travel? By comparing Goku’s height to a single spike, we can measure each curve. We can then remove those curves from the overall length. So it turns out that Goku actually flew 307,000 kilometers, nearly 11,000 km/h. “That shatters every flying record in Equestria history,” muttered Celestia. Boomstick: To see how fast his base form is at the end of the series, we run the Snake Way number through the gravity formula to find that his top speed clocks in at over 2 1/2 billion km/h, over 2x the speed of light. DURABILITY (*Cue: Dangerous Mind - DBZ Ultimate Tenkaichi*) Wizard: We can determine Goku’s durability through this bomb, which the brilliant Dr. Gero designed to kill Goku at age 25, when his maximum potential was Kaio-Ken x4. Bulma: That was intended for Goku. Android 16: It was intended to be a last resort. “Talk about going out with a bang!” joked Pinkie Pie getting a few groans from her friends. Boomstick: Scans of the bomb display a TNT measurement of 657. “Bulma says the bomb could destroy the Earth, so this is likely measured in quadrillion megatons, since it takes at least 53 quadrillion megatons of force to destroy the Earth. Wizard: So in his final form, Goku can survive up to nearly 35 sextillion megatons. The group was yet again stun by this info. KI POWER Boomstick: Goku doesn’t rely solely on his physical abilities. He amplifies his strength and durability with ki. Wizard: But even though his ki reserves cannot be measured, we can determine his maximum output. See, his ki attacks do not force him backward unless he allows them to. Boomstick: Even when firing upward at full power, the ground beneath him remains untouched. Wizard: Therefore, according to physics, his maximum output is at most equal to the amount of force he can withstand. Boomstick: Luckily, we just calculated that with the Gero bomb. “My heads starting to hurt” muttered Spike. CONCLUSION (*Cues: Smallville Score - A Hall of Heroes*) Wizard: Alright, now that we’ve determined Goku’s maximum potential, let’s compare it to Superman’s. STRENGTH – Goku – 160,000 tons (w/o ki) – Superman - >6.6 quintillion tons SPEED – Goku – 2.5 billion k/ph – Superman - >9.4 billion k/ph DURABILITY – Goku – 34.7 sextillion MT – Superman - >10 octillion MT Boomstick: HOLY SHIT! Not even close. “It’s almost unfair!” shouted Twilight one of the few in the room to understand all the math and science used just now. Wizard: Now we can keep throwing feats and equations around, but in the end, numbers cannot measure what Goku and Superman are capable of. They are both ultimate heroes, solutions to daunting problems and achievers of the impossible. The difference is at the core of their character. Goku has never been invincible; he has very clear limits and must overcome those limits to solve the problems at hand. That’s the whole point. On the other hand, Superman’s story is not about the fight to become the best, but of an immigrant facing the challenge of home versus heritage. After accepting his alien side, Superman has reached his full potential, which under the endless power of the sun is essentially limitless. In short, “Superman is as strong as he needs to be.” [Superman Homepage] So what happens when you pit a man with the power to break any limits against another who has no limits in the first place? Well, only one has limits to give at all. “That was quite Deep Wizard,” said Celestia impressed. Boomstick: Goku just Kaio-can’t keep up with the Man of Steel. “And Boomstick had to ruin it with a pun,” remarked Luna with a deadpanned look. Wizard: The winner is Superman. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ END. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ “That ….was ….epic,” Rainbow said, after the credits rolled. “Those two were the toughest one we saw,” she said, rising in the air a bit. “That it was young Rainbow. I dare say that even myself and my sister would have trouble fighting those two,” Luna said, getting off the couch as everyone else made their way towards the glowing box. “Agreed sister, but I believe we should push those thoughts away and see what this box gave us,” Celestia said, standing in front of the box. “Yeah, let’s see what cool stuff we got,” Spike cheered from Twilight’s back. “I would like to know as well. If you don’t mind,” Fluttershy said, hugging Doomguy Plushie as his theme song came on. The royals gave the plushie a strange look as the song came on but shrugged a moment later. Twilight opened the box, expecting to see toys, comics or even a few gadgets. But all Twilight saw were just a bunch of thin wrapped things inside. Using her magic, Twilight lifted them out and saw that they all had a name on them. Giving each one to their respective owner, everyone looked at them curiously. “What are these things?” Rarity asked, inspecting her gift carefully. “Maybe it’s chocolate,” Pinkie said, grinning wildly. She started to rip off the wrapping paper wildly until she saw what it was and started to shake happily. “This is so super mega awesome cool,” she said, bouncing on her hind hooves. “What is it, Pinkie?” Twilight asked, gazing at her friend curiously. “Yes, what’s got you in such a happy mood?” Rarity asked, her eyebrow raising from her friend’s strange behavior. Well stranger than her normal behavior. Pinkie didn’t say anything but turned her thing around to show them. What they saw was a beautiful portrait of Pinkie is firing a happy White Bomberman out of her party cannon while munching on some pizza with Mikey. “Woah,” the younger members of the group said as the older ones looked impressed with it. Soon everyone was tearing off the wrapping of their respective packages and gazing at what was inside. “This is ...it’s beautiful,” Rarity said, showing everyone her own portrait. In Rarity’s portrait showed herself making a dress for Wonder Woman as she tried them on while Felicia played with Opal. “I need to find a spot to mount this.” “I reckon I need to do the same,” Applejack said, showing them the picture of her and Chun Li bucking and kicking apple trees while Mike Haggar catches the apples with two baskets. “I should show the family this.” “I really like this. It’s really nice,” Fluttershy said, as she look at her portrait of Doomguy is hugging her and his bunny while Pikachu rests on her head. “Whoa! Check this one out guys!” Spike yelled as he look at his portrait which had Yoshi and him are standing over a beaten, unconscious Shang Tsung, with Spike holding up his grapple-hook triumphantly. “A lot of thought must of went into this,” said Twilight as she looked at her portrait which had Spider-Man swinging through the city with Twilight and Harry Potter flying next to him. Shining Armor and Cadence smiled as soon as they saw their portrait which showed The two are standing atop a hill ready to battle, on Shining's side is Master Chief and Link, and on Cadence's side is Samus Aran and Rogue. Shining is wearing Master Chief's armor (minus the helmet) and holding Link's shield, Cadence is wearing Samus Aran's light suit (again, no mask). “I shall mount this on my wall poste haste!” declared Luna as she stared at her portrait, the portrait had Luna standing on the edge of a building overlooking the city in her Mare-Do-Well outfit (Unmasked). Next to her is Batman, Zelda (as Sheik), and Spawn. “I agree with you on that idea sister,” said Celestia as her Portrait had her is flying through space with Thor, Superman, and SS4 Goku. “It seems like Dash like her’s,” laughed Applejack as she saw the blue mare with a goofy smile on her blushing face as look at a portrait of Sonic and her floating above Starscream's destroyed remains in their Super and Rainbow forms. Giving each other a fist/hoof bump. It also had an autograph written on it. Don't look back, you've got no regrets, cause time won't wait for you, you choose to go your own way. Sincerely, Sonic the Hedgehog. PS: Congrats on the win, Dash! Remember, your story only ends when you stop running! “Awesome,” whispered a love struck Rainbow Dash as she stared at the portrait. (thank you Alphamon_Ouryuken for the gift ideas.) “So what did you get Starlight?” asked Twilight but she did not receive a response. Looking at her friend curiously, Twilight saw Starlight holding some paper in a magical aura while glaring at it. Being the curious mare, Twilight grabbed the paper and saw that it was a written letter for her silent friend. “Dear, Starlight. I hope you enjoyed the trip I planned for you as it took so long to make those twists and turns just right. That was a little punishment for trying to mess with time so don’t do it again. Have a nice day! With love Deadman,” Twilight said out loud, looking at Starlight nervously. “Are you okay, Starlight? If you want to talk we can….” Starlight looked up to the sky and screamed. “DEADMAN YOU NO GOOD MOTHER-!!!” ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ With the chaos duo. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ “DEADMAN YOU NO GOOD MOTHER(Twilight:Language!)!!!!!” Trepp looked up from his book and dryly said, “I’m guessing you have something to do with that.” Deadman finished taking a drink from a cup in his toes and said, “oh Trepp why would you think that?” “Oh I don’t know, maybe the sound of someone or something cursing your name?” Trepp asked sarcastically, rolling his eyes. “You really need to get a hobby.” “Oh come on! Deadman is a completely common name!” whined the fiery chaos god. “Besides I think we should talk about what to do now!” he proclaimed. “If this is about your idea about the Caboose Canon, then I’m not dealing with those two teams again,” Trepp said angrily, rubbing his arm. “That teal armored chick almost tore your legs off the last time we were there.” “She never returns my calls ether…” whimpered a sad Deadman. “If it’s talking to the egotistical pharaoh in that kid’s body then no,” Trepp said, his eyes hardening. “I’m not dealing with a children’s card game again.” “I miss my buddy Tristan,” commented Deadman. “And if you’re talking about that headmaster teddy bear and the bitch that gets a despair lady boner then FUCK NO,” Trepp yelled, his eyes twitching. “I’ll kill that bitch If I see her again, no matter how hot she looks.” “I wonder how my champion is doing ever since i blessed him with ultimate luck?” wondered Deadman. “Do you mean that ultimate bullshit guy?” Trepp asked, getting a headache just thinking about the white haired Hope freak. “He won half a million from me, the lucky bastard.” “HA! But no i was thinking before we send the second season of death battle I think we should send a little something to the human world…” said Deadman. “What do you want to send?” Trepp asked, preparing himself for the next idiotic idea coming from his ….friend’s mouth. “Well i was thinking of doi-!!” started Deadman but was interrupted by a bright flash of light that blinded the two beings of chaos and out from the light two beings that Trepp and Deadman hope to never run into emerged. “Their they are! There’s the two culprits,” A creature that looked like a miss match of animal parts put together said, pointing a claw at the two. “Yes Discord. I knew these two had to be behind this if you weren’t,” A tall fair skinned woman with gold jewerly said, glaring at the two. The woman was wearing a greek dress that looked to be made of rainbows just like her hair and her eyes changed colors every few seconds. This was Harmony. “To be fair, it was Deadman’s fault,” Trepp said, throwing his fellow chaos god under the bus. “Wow~! How about you just back up that bus up just to finish the job!” yelled an irate Deadman. “Oh he doesn’t have to,” Harmony calmy said, cracking her knuckles with a smile on her face. “I’ll be happy to do that. PERSONALLY.” “Well… Fuck.” the doomed Chaos god muttered. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ CHAPTER END! NEXT TIME HE-MAN VS. LION-O!. He-man vs. Lion-O.As Celestia’s sun rose over the horizon, Applejack yawned as she pulled herself out of bed and made her way towards the orchard. Since it was Big Mac’s turn to make breakfast she decided to get a few minutes of apple-bucking in, it always helped her work up an appetite. Getting a running start, she galloped towards the nearest tree and turned around, giving it a hard buck, she took a moment to watch the fruits fall… only they weren’t the fruits she was expecting. “What in the hay?!” She shouted as pears rained down from the tree. Looking around, she realised that every single tree around her had pears instead of apples. “How in tarnation-” *SMACK* “-EYOOW!” The farmpony yelped as she felt something smack her rear. Turning around, she realized that somepony had placed a pear sticker over both her cutie marks! “Alright! Who’s the wise-guy who’s dumb enough tah-WOAH!!” She shouted as a certain rainbow-colored blur tackled her before she could react... [an hour later.] “Wait, where’s Applejack?” Twilight asked. Rainbow smirked deviously. “Oh, she’ll be along shortly...” As if on cue, Applejack stormed into the room with a less-than-pleased look on her face. And it was easy to see why; she was wearing a giant pear costume that only allowed her head, legs, and tail to poke out. Everyone in the room could only stare in shock while Rainbow, Spike and Pinkie burst out laughing. “So, like the new theme I picked for you... Pearjack?” Rainbow managed to say as she held Pinkie for support. Applejack glared at the cyan pegasus in rage. “SHUT. UP. RAINBOW. DASH.” “Aw, don't be so sour. Pearjack.” Pinkie giggled. “It's just a prank!” “Don't call me that!!” Applejack snapped before giving Rainbow Dash a dark glare. “Now give me the key!” Starlight gasped as she composed herself. “W-What key?” Applejack pointed to the back of her costume, which had some sort of lock embedded into it. “The reason Ah can't take it off it's because that stupid lock keeps it stuck on!” “Well… ok I'll fork over that key…” said Rainbow dash with a shrug. “Good-” the farm mare was about to say. “AFTER the battle!” stated Rainbow Dash with a grin “WHAT?!” the farm pony yelled. (thank ya Alphamon_Ouryuken) “Well… i guess we should start the next episode then,” commented Twilight as she pressed play. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Interlude (*Cues: Invader - Jim Johnston*) Wiz: Ahh, the glorious 80's. That odd era of big hair, keytars, and goofy muscular heroes of questionable sexual preference. “Oh~?” questioned Rarity with small blush dusting her cheeks after hearing the last part of Wiz’s speech. Boomstick: He-Man, master of the universe... “Those muscles,” muttered Applejack, trying to hide her blush. Wiz: And Lion-O, Lord of the Thundercats. “A kitty lord?” asked Fluttershy, looking at the screen in interest. Boomstick: He's Wiz and I'm Boomstick Wiz: And it's our job to analyze their weapons, armor, and skills to find out who would win a Death Battle. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ He-Man Prince Adam: Let's go, Cringer! He-Man and Battlecat are about to make an appearance. (*He-Man!*) “Did anyone else hear that?” asked a spooked Starlight. (*Cues: He-Man - Main Theme (Instrumental)*) Wiz: Prince Adam is the pathetic, bumbling son to the royal family of Eternia. (*He-Man runs into a lamp and crashes*) Boomstick/Rainbow Dash: Ha-ha, dumbass. Wiz: Then one day, a bird-clad sorceress gave him the secret powers of Castle Grayskull, transforming him into He-Man, the most powerful chip-n-dale in the universe. “What the hay is a Chip-n-Dale?” asked Applejack. Prince Adam: Fabulous secret powers were revealed to me the day I held aloft my magic sword and said, "By the power of Grayskull..." (*He-Man!*) He-Man: "I have the power!" The ponies and dragon watch as the young Prince Adam turn into the more powerful looking He-man. They almost didn’t recognize him if it wasn’t for them seeing the transformation and the hair. Background Alter ego: Prince Adam Height: 2.1 m / 6'11" Weight: 145 kg / 320 Ibs Descendent of King Grayskull Leader of the Heroic Warriors Trained by Man-At-Arms & Teela An excellent singer? Boomstick: Wait, wait, that's his origin story? He just thrust his sword up and down and yelled some random shit until he turned into a near-naked superhero? Wiz: Well, more like a cheap action figure. “I can see it.” commented Spike. “But what kind of a superhero name is He-Man?” Twilight asked in confusion. “It's like if somepony went around calling herself ‘Equine-Pony’, seems kinda redundant.” Boomstick: He-Man possesses herculean strength, speed, durability, and a super breath which can blow over most foes, and probably a few other things if you know what I'm saying. The girls blush knowing exactly what boomstick meant. Powers Herculean strength Super durability Super speed Super breath Can create a tornado Acrobatic (*Cues: He-Man & She-Ra Orchestral Melody - He-Man*) Wiz: The indestructible Power Sword is the conduit for his immutability, and has some unique powers of its own. Boomstick: Like any good sword, it deflects lasers and can also do a bunch of other random stuff, like magnetize special rings... “I need a sword like that…” Spike mumbled to himself. Imagining how cool he'd look wielding such a blade. Boomstick: ...or tie people up with magic S&M. “Oh, the things I’d do to Sunburst with that...” Starlight whispered to herself with a smile. “What?” Twilight asked. “Nothing!“ Starlight yelled with a strained smile Twilight casually moved away from her student. Wiz: And while he is skilled enough to throw his sword like a boomerang, he occasionally uses ranged gear, such as a grappling hook and bolas, to battle the evil of Skeletor. Boomstick: But I don't know where he's keeping those things. I mean he's practically much na-WOAH-HO-HO-HOA! Everyone in the room gawked upon seeing He-Man pull the bolas out of his… small, spandex shorts. “MY EYES!” Spike screamed as he covered his face while Applejack quickly covered Fluttershy’s eyes. “Oh… wow...” Twilight and Rarity blushed. “Oh my~ I wonder what else he keeps in there~” Starlight giggled while Rainbow and Pinkie tried their best to keep a straight face. Boomstick: You'd think he'd keep it in his battle harness made of Korodite, which, by the way, further multiplies his already insane strength by 10. “Wouldn't mind having something like that,” said Applejack. He-Man: That's what the sorceress fashioned this harness from. It helps add to my power. Arsenal Power Sword Indestructible Boomerang throw Deflects destructive rays Merged with Sword of the Ancients Other magical properties Bolas Grappling Hook Shield Korodite battle harness Multiplies his strength by 10 (*Cues: He-Man - Orko's Theme*) Wiz: Prince Adam is not the only one getting a power-up. He has an adopted cat, whom he saved from the jungle at a young age. “Awwww~!” said everyone as they saw a young Cringer. Boomstick: He named him Cringer 'cause... well... he's a little bitch. But whenever He-Man transforms, he zaps the little pussy, turning him into the ferocious Battle Cat. (*Battle Cat roar*) “AWESOME!” cheered Rainbow Dash. Wiz: Despite Cringer's reluctance and downright refusal to do so. Boomstick: He's kinda like the Michael Vick of cartoon heroes. Cringer: Oh no. My mother didn't raise any foolish children. That got a few laughs from the group. (*Cues: He-Man - Snake Mountain Theme*) Wiz: Granted, Battle Cat is a tremendous asset. He's so vicious it's implied that if he doesn't transform back into Cringer, he could go on an unstoppable rampage. After all, he is half tiger, half dragon. “Wait, WHAT?!” Starlight and Twilight exclaimed in shock. Fluttershy smiled, loving the possibility of such a hybrid existing. Maybe she could befriend it? “That is so cool!!” Spike and Rainbow shouted in awe. Boomstick & Pinkie(bouncing up and down): Gimme, gimme, gimme, gimme, gimme, gimme! Battle Cat Alter ego: Cringer Height: 1.5 m / 5' (on all fours) Weight: 226.8 kg / 500 Ibs Tiger/Dragon mixed breed Vicious & volatile He-Man-like abilities Super strength Super speed Roar can cause earthquakes (*Cues: Unknown Theme*) Wiz: He-Man has moved mountains, reversed a tornado, ran in circles fast enough to create a vacuum... Boomstick and Starlight: The fuck? Rainbow sighed. “Because EVERY superhero needs super-speed now...” “Like your boy-” Rarity began, only to notice the pegasus pull out a notebook. “...nevermind.” She quickly corrected herself, prompting Rainbow to put the book away without writing anything. Wiz: And dug to the center of the planet with nothing but a broken stalactite. Boomstick, Starlight, and Twilight: The DOUBLE fuck?! (*Cues Instrumental He-Man theme again*) Wiz: He even shattered Photanium, the strongest metal in his universe, when even his closest friends believed it would be too much for him. That really impressed the group, being able to break something that was considered impossible. Boomstick: And he traded blows with Superman... you know, that one guy who can lift entire planets and maybe killed your favorite person ever? That one. “Poor Goku….” muttered Fluttershy. “Still mighty impressive that He-man is able to stand his own with superman,” said Applejack getting a few nods from her friends in agreement. Feats Moved a mountain Lifted the city of Arcadia Reversed a tornado Can break photanium Has battled Superman Pushed a moon And many other seemingly impossible things Wiz: Well, he's not that strong, but he did manage to push a moon once... or twice. For a moment everyone could've sworn they heard Princess Luna scream out ‘blasphemy!’ in the distance. Wiz: But despite his miraculous strength, he is not invincible. Enough raw force can revert him back to the far more vulnerable state of Prince Adam. He also despises violence, preferring to outsmart opponents, and thus has much less physical combat experience than you'd think. “Well at least he’s a thinker and not just all brawn,” commented Twilight. Weaknesses May revert back to Adam from extreme force Power of Grayskull can be relinquished Lacks deadly ranged weaponry Limited experience with violence Boomstick: Still, he's pretty good at beating the everliving crap out of people, no matter what planet or series he's on. “Agreed.” said Spike. Wiz: That's right. The 1990s New Adventures of He-Man is technically the same He-Man we all know, giving him much more experience... Boomstick: Wait, wait, wait, what was that? (*Pauses footage*) Wiz: Shh, this is vital... Boomstick: No, no, no! Go back! Go back! Right there! “Whats got Boomy all ruffled up?” asked a confused Pinkie Pie. (*Rewinds back*) (*He-Man fixes broken chain… somehow*) He-Man: There you go, fella. Good as new. (*Cues: Run Orko - He-Man*) Boomstick: Whu-? Okay, so it's broken, I guess I'll just magic it back together! Wiz: The magic of the '80s, Boomstick. The magic of the '80s. “The 80’s sound wired…” muttered Rainbow Dash. Boomstick: Magic of lazy writing. “Sounds like what a few ponies say about this story,” snickered Pinkie Pie. ….Screw you. (*Grappling hook pulls down door*) He-Man: Next time, you might try knocking first. (*He-Man!*) ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ The group had to admit that no matter how… colorful He-Man was he had the best chances at winning so far. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Lion-O (*Cues: ThunderCats - Main Theme (Instrumental)*) (*Thundercats!*) Lion-O: Let's get this show on the road. Wiz: As a child, Lion-O barely escaped the destruction of his home planet Thundara. His father sent him to 3rd Earth with five Thundarian nobles to uphold the royal lineage. Starlight blinked. “Wait, that kinda sounds like…” “Superman!?” yelled everyone instantly seeing the similarities. Boomstick: You know, I'm really gettin' tired of people ripping off Superman. “Ugh, I know right?” Pinkie scoffed. Wiz: But the Kryptonian comparison stops there, as on route to 3rd Earth, a suspension capsule malfunctioned... or something, it's not really explained, caused his body to age ten years. Tygra: During that time, he grew in size, but he did not grow up. “He lost ten years of his life,” muttered Fluttershy feeling sad for the thunder cat. Lion-O: What's going on? (*bumps head on capsule door*) Boomstick: Aww, we missed the cute kitty stage! Shut up! Kittens are adorable! “I didn’t know Boomstick had a soft spot for cute things,” commented a surprised Rarity. (*Cues: ThunderCats - Orchestra Theme Medley*) Wiz: As the newly crowned Lord of the Thundercats, Lion-O is the leader of the group and commands all of cat-kind. Background Age: 13 years, physically 23 Height: 1.9 m / 6'4" Weight: 102.5 kg / 225 Ibs Species: Thunderian Lord of the ThunderCats Trained by ThunderCat nobles Has command over all cats Snarf: Lion-O has power over all cats! (*Cues: ThunderCats - ThunderTank*) Wiz: Against the evil forces of Mumm-ra, Lion-O was forced to mature on the battlefield. He is a quick learner, helped by his cat-like abilities and attributes. Boomstick: Which means he's got superhuman agility and senses. “That fits his cat heritage quit nicely,” said Rarity knowing a few things about cats from being an owner of one. Wiz: Right. For example, while a human's nose has five million odor-sensitive cells, a cat's has over 200 million. Cats can hear five times better, have panoramic vision, and use their whiskers like antenna to scan for trouble, meaning it's actually very unlikely for curiosity to kill a cat... unless they're distracted by bright shiny things. “(giggle) cats are so cute when they play with things,” giggled out Fluttershy. (*Cues: ThunderCats - Panthro*) Boomstick: Lion-O wears a manly sports bra and wrestling shorts and doesn't seem to own anything else. Guess someone forgot to pack, oh, you know, CLOTHES for the interplanetary trip! Rarity almost fainted at the thought of just wearing one piece of clothing and nothing else. (*Cheetara roar*) (*Cues: ThunderCats - Orchestra Theme Medley*) Boomstick: Wardrobe aside, he wields the Sword of Omens, a pocket-sized dagger, which transforms into an epic blade after the most badass battle cry ever. Lion-O: Thunder! Thunder! Thunder! Thundercats, ho! The group had to agree that was one of the coolest things they have ever heard, right up thier with the Kamehameha. (*Cues: ThunderCats - Tygra*) Boomstick: It's an extremely durable, double-edged blade that cuts through stone and steel with ease. He can fly, make force fields, and shoot over fifteen different kinds of beams. Lightning bolts, fire blasts, and even a tractor beam, which Lion-O can guide things with, which is great for when you're on the couch. (*Lion-O impression*) Sword of Omens... bring me snacks beyond snacks... and a beer! “Sigh... only boomstick would use an artifact like that for something so stupid…” muttered Twilight. “Sword of Omens... bring me gems beyond gems!” Spike called out in a mock Lion O voice. “And a cupcake!” Pinkie giggled. “Ok maybe not just him,” she admitted. “Oh like you wouldn't try the same thing.” Starlight smirked before styling her mane to match Twilight’s. “Sword of Omens... bring me books beyond books… and Celestia’s diary!” This earned a laugh from everyone while Twilight rolled her eyes and chuckled a bit. Sword of Omens Cuts through most material Extends immeasurably Can be summoned from a distance Flight Casts force fields Sword Beams Lightning, fire, or varied temperatures Laser + "guiding" beam Scattered explosive beams Many, many more (*Cues: ThunderCats - Orchestral Theme Medley*) Wiz: The sword's power stems from the gem housed in its hilt, the Eye of Thundera, a legendary jewel with limitless magical power, which its wielder can call upon even from a great distance, such as inside a black hole. “B-but a black hole’s gravitational pull is too strong for ANYTHING to escape, even light!” cried Twilight as she tried to fathom something being that powerful. Lion-O: Sword of Omens... come to my hand! Wiz: It is powerful enough to hold an entire planet together and can spy on people and events across space and time. Lion-O: Sword of Omens... give me sight beyond sight! “I can see Rainbow using it too,” Spike said, snickering. “And why would I use that?” Rainbow asked curiously. “To see your favorite hedgehog~,” Spike said as everyone chuckled. Rainbow pulled out her notebook and wrote in it furiously as Applejack said, “You know you walked into that one right sugarcube?” “Worth it,” Spike said, shrugging his shoulder before turning his attention back to the screen. The Eye of Thundera A separate, living entity Limitless magical power Grants super strength Alerts of relevant danger Source of ThunderCat life Sight-Beyond-Sight Surveys events across space & time Visual & audible Cosmic & magnetic fields can interfere “(whistle) I have a feeling that gem puts the elements to shame,” commented Starlight as she marveled at the powerful jewel. “I wonder what I'd taste like?” Spike mused to himself. “Probably very spicy…” (*Cues: ThunderCats - Main Theme (Casual)*) Boomstick: He wears the Claw Shield, an extremely durable claw... glove thing, with which in his first outing he effortlessly punched down a tree. Hey, that's just like how I catch squirrels for supper! “Not the cute squirrels!” cried Fluttershy. Wiz: The Claw Shield may be small, but it's proven effective against blades, blows, and lasers. As a bonus, it has four grappling hooks, a smoke screen, and functions as a neat little scabbard for the Sword of Omens. “Ah~ I love seeing something that is both functional and fashionable,” cooed Rarity as she admired the multi purpose tool. Boomstick: But the Claw Shield can't protect him from everything. “But it get’s the job done,” Stated AppleJack with a firm nod. Claw Shield Extremely durable shield 4 grappling hooks Claw-shot Smokescreen Highly reflective surface Claws can pierce stone Small, portable size Sheathes the Sword of Omens (*Cues: ThunderCats - Thundera*) Wiz: While Lion-O is certainly quite sophisticated for an oversized thirteen-year old man-kitten, he is still somewhat immature and hot-blooded. Also, both Lion-O and the Eye of Thundera share a common weakness to a glowing red rock called Thundrainium. Okay, I lied, there was one more Superman rip-off (Pinkie:YOU LIED TO ME!). While the Eye is one of the most powerful weapons ever conceived, it may also be his greatest weakness. Turns out it's the source of life for all Thundercats, so if it's destroyed, so is Lion-O... and his entire race. The group was shocked such a deadly weakness. Not only would having the gem destroyed kill Lion-O but also his own People would die as well! Boomstick: I know! I'll bring it into constant danger and get disarmed a lot! “Then he needs a new weapon!” yelled Spike. Weaknesses Thundrainium Very reliant on Eye Minimal education Somewhat immature & hot-blooded The Eye is the source of his life (*Cues: Thundercats - Orchestral Theme Medley*) Wiz: Still, Lion-O is stronger, smarter, and faster than any other Thundercat. He can pull down a spaceship attempting escape velocity and won a foot race against Cheetara, who can run 120 miles per hour. “Well at least he’s not that fast…” muttered Rainbow Dash. happy to see one fighter she could out race. Boomstick: Oh, and look... he fought Superman too. “How many heroes have fought the man of steel?” asked a confused Spike. “More than you think but less than what you hoped,” stated Pinkie Pie while wearing a weird looking gasmask. Wiz: He's tough enough to survive boiling water, the molten core of the planet, and even the... vacuum of space? Boomsticks: '80s magic, Wiz. '80s lazy-writin' magic. “Insert 80’s joke here,” said Pinkie Pie while in a fit of giggles. Feats Lifted & threw an Ancient Spirit of Evil Beat Panthro in strength Beat Cheetara in a 5 mile sprint Pulled an escaping starship down Survived the planet's core Survived the vacuum of space Held together a broken planet Lion-O: Sword of Omens... give me power beyond power! Ho! Wiz: Alright the combatants are set. Let's end this debate once and for all. Boomstick: It’s time for a Death Battle! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ The team was kind of torn on who to root for this time. Both fighter were goofy but also very endearing in their own way. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Death Battle (*Cues: Royal Family - He-Man and the Masters of the Universe*) In a forest, Prince Adam is talking to Cringer, who is hiding in a bush. Prince Adam: Okay, Cringer. Let's try this again. This time, no whining, okay? Cringer: Oh no. Not again. “Poor Cringer,” muttered Fluttershy, feeling bad for the dragon/cat hybrid. Prince Adam then takes out the Power Sword and transforms into He-Man. (*Cues: He-Man and the Masters of the Universe - Main Theme*) Prince Adam: By the power of Grayskull... (*He-Man!*) He-Man: I have the power! “Unlimited POWER!” cackled Pinkie Pie while wearing a black cloak. “Pinkie, did you take that cloak from my closet?” Rarity asked, glaring at her hyperactive friend. “Nope,” Pinkie said cheerfully. He-Man then uses his sword on the bush without looking, beginning Cringer's transformation. Cringer: The pain... (*Battle Cat roar which also sounds like he’s in pain.*) (*Cues: Mumm-Ra The Ever Living - ThunderCats*) Elsewhere in that same forest, Lion-O hears Battle Cat's pained roar, then takes the Sword of Omens out of the Claw Shield, preparing to transform the blade. (*Cues: ThunderCats - Sword of Omens*) Lion-O: That sounds like trouble. Thunder! Thunder! Thunder! Thundercats, ho! Lion-O then looks over at the Eye of Thundera to find out about the disturbance. Lion-O: Sword of Omens... give me sight beyond sight! (*Cues: Royal Family - He-Man and the Masters of the Universe*) He-Man then jumps onto the fully transformed Battle Cat. He-Man: Alright Battle Cat... let's go do something normally perceived as impossible. “And drive twilight crazy in the process,” snickered Spike. Lion-O: Stop right there! (*Cues ThunderCats (Instrumental)*) Lion-O then jumps out in front of He-Man and Battle Cat. Lion-O: You would mound that poor pussy like some kind of mule? You muscular fiend! Noble tiger, turn on your master! “I…. i have now words for that,” muttered Pinkie Pie. (HA! *whack!* OW DAMMIT HARMONY!”) (*Cues: ThunderCats - Danger Approaching*) He-Man is suddenly booted off by Battle Cat. He-Man: He must have control over animals. “He’s got some skill over cats like Fluttershy has with all animals,” stated Applejack causing said mare to blush from the sudden attention. He-Man then proceeds to punch Battle Cat high into the air. “Kitty NO!” cried Fluttershy as she saw Battle cat fly out of view. He-Man: That should keep you busy for a while. Lion-O: I am Lion-O, Lord of the Thundercats... and you will pay for your animal cruelty. “Oh god it’s like Goku vs Superman all over again,” muttered Twilight as she saw another fight start because of another misunderstanding. He-Man then takes out his sword. He-Man: I am He-Man. Back off, feline. You are clearly not equipped to... Lion-O then proceeds to take out the Sword of Omens which then extends to a longer blade. He-Man: Ohhhh~. “...did he really just…?” Rainbow gawked. “Mmmmhmhmhmhm….” Pinkie giggled perversely. “This is gonna be fun...” FIGHT! (*Cues: ThunderCats - Intro Theme (METAL)*) Lion-O fires a lightning blast at He-Man, who deflects it with his sword back at Lion-O, who blocks it. He-Man then picks up a boulder and throws it at Lion-O, who leaps at it and slashes through it with his blade, then clashes with He-Man's sword. He-Man knocks Lion-O away, then leaps towards him as the two begin to duel. Lion-O tries using fast side-swipe slashes on He-Man, but he blocks all of them, with the last move knocking the Sword of Omens away from Lion-O. “The big guy gots some fancy moves!” commented a impressed Rainbow Dash. He-Man: Surrender. You are defenseless. Lion-O: I've got plenty of tricks left. Lion-O then uses his Claw Shield's smoke screen, allowing him to escape. “Clever girl…” muttered Pinkie Pie while wearing a hunter's hat. (*Cues: ThunderCats - Curiosity*) He-Man: *coughs* Have to... clear this. *exhales* He-Man uses his super breath to clear away the smoke screen. He-Man: There... now where did he go? Lion-O hides from He-Man behind a tree. Lion-O *whisper*: Sword of Omens... come to me. He-Man: I heard that. “Ok that’s creepy,” said Spike. (*Cues: He-Man and the Masters of the Universe Theme again*) He-Man then runs up to the tree and obliterates it with a single punch. “DANG! I know he has super strength but it’s still crazy seeing somepony obliterate a tree with one punch,” said an amazed AppleJack. (*He-Man!*) The Sword of Omens then flies past He-Man and returns to Lion-O, who then proceeds to fire more lightning. Lion-O: Ho! He-Man once again deflects the blasts with his sword, then throws his sword towards Lion-O, who ducks it, and sees that it is about to return to He-Man. (*Cues: Mumm-Ra The Ever Living - ThunderCats*) Lion-O: Not so fast... Lion-O uses the tractor beam to plunge the Power Sword into the ground, then uses his Claw Shield to fire his four ropes at He-Man, ensnaring him. (*Cues: Imminent Danger - ThunderCats*) Lion-O: Want to keep going? Looks like you're a bit tied up at the moment. “Ohhh,” Twilight groaned. He-Man: *groans* Sorry, cat man, but you won't string me along that easily. “He really said that?” Starlight asked, massaging her head. He-Man then breaks through the ropes by flexing his muscle. “Mmm~ momma likes,” purred out Rarity as she admired the gun show that He-man was freely showing off. (*He-Man!*) (*Cues: ThunderCats - Mutants Battle*) Lion-O fires more lightning at He-Man, who avoids all of the blasts. He-Man: A whirlwind should blow him off course. “Boo!” booed Rainbow Dash as she found that pun really cheesy. He-Man then runs around in a circle multiple times, creating a tornado that quickly moves towards Lion-O, who is sucked into it. Lion-O: I... think... I've... got a... hairball. (*groans*) “... ew” muttered everyone. Lion-O is eventually thrown out of the tornado and then lunges towards He-Man, who runs towards his sword. Just after He-Man had retrieved the Power Sword, he is slashed by Lion-O, who then runs back towards him. Lion-O: Feel the power of Thundera! Lion-O then uses his sword to blast He-Man with a beam, which knocks him far back. Lion-O: Now to finish you off! Wait... where did you go? Lion-O looks back at the Eye of Thundera for the answer. Lion-O: Sword of Omens... give me sight beyond sight. “Oh boy! The crazy things i would do with that power,” said Pinkie Pie getting a shudder from her friends. (*Cues: ThunderCats - The Eye of Thundera*) He is suddenly shown a faraway mountain. Lion-O: Hmm... a mountain? Why show me this? Suddenly, the mountain is shown to be lifted upward. “That… is… AWESOME!” cheered Rainbow Dash. Lion-O: Wait a minute... that's... impossible... “Not for He-man!” cheered Pinkie Pie. (*Cues: Masters of the Universe - Orchestral Redux*) Without warning, the entire mountain is flung up into the air towards Lion-O. (*He-Man!*) (*Cues: Thundercats - Orchestral Theme Medley*) Lion-O: By Thundera! Sword of Omens... give me power beyond power! With this, Lion-O fires a beam from the Sword of Omens at the incoming mountain, causing it to disintegrate. Afterward, He-Man comes running towards Lion-O, then punches him. “Hiss! Ooooh~!” hiss out the group at seeing He-man sucker punch Lion-O. (*Cues: He-Man and the Masters of the Universe Theme again*) (*He-Man!*) Lion-O is somewhat dazed by this punch as He-Man runs by and punches him again, also dazing him. He-Man then comes lunging with his sword, but Lion-O erects a shield around him, which He-Man breaks after a few swings of his sword, shattering the shield. Lion-O then makes the Sword of Omen's blade extend, stabbing He-Man. (*Cues: He-Man Theme Instrumental*) Lion-O: Time for the climactic finale! “OK, now they're just doing that on purpose!” Twilight groaned. The rest of the group couldn't help but laugh at their friend’s frustration. He-Man then punches the Sword of Omens, which, in slow motion, shows the bending of the sword traveling towards the handle, completely shattering it and leaving the Eye of Thundera to fall onto the ground. Lion-O stands with his hand over his face, completely blown away by what has happened. “Holy cow! Yelled a surprised Spike as he saw He-man effortlessly destroy the sword of omen. Lion-O: That's not possible! “It’s kind of his thing to do the impossible,” Rainbow Dash commented dryly. He-Man then leaps down at Lion-O, greatly wounding him. The group winced at the sudden but brutal defeat that Lion-O was dealt with. He-Man: Ha-ha! You are finished! Lion-O: (*groans in pain*) He-Man then notices the Eye of Thundera floating upward. “Uhhhh…” muttered out Starlight as the left of the group was wondering wha He-Man: That gem... it's looking at me... “It’s kind of creepy…” muttered Pinkie Pie. (*Cues: Unknown Theme*) Without warning, the Eye of Thundera fires a large beam of energy, which even He-Man can barely withstand, as he slowly moves towards the gem and then manages to grab it with both hands. He-Man: Grayskull... give me the strength of the castle's secrets! “But will it be enough?” muttered Fluttershy. And with that, He-Man shatters the Eye of Thundera, killing Lion-O. He then crouches down towards Lion-O. He-Man: Well... looks like curiosity killed this cat. “... not cool,” muttered Rainbow Dash. Suddenly, Battle Cat finally falls back down. He-Man simply laughs. “Dang! That boy was in the air for like 4 minutes!" marveld AppleJack. K.O.! He-Man then continues laughing while Battle Cat chews on Lion-O. Results (*Cues: Masters of the Universe - Orchestral Redux*) Boomstick: What a crushing defeat. Wiz: While He-Man had little trouble overpowering Lion-O's physique, the Eye of Thundara is easily the most dangerous weapon He-Man has ever faced; more than capable of obliterating him if given the chance. Boomstick: Not only can the Power Sword deflect all Lion-O's main attacks, it's obvious He-Man is strong enough to break the Sword of Omens, just like how the super-strong and... horribly named Tug Mug broke it in the ThunderCats show. Wiz: A moon was approximately 70 quintillion metric tons. The highest official amount a human being has ever lifted without support is over 260 kilograms. Even after excluding the Kordite battle harness, He-Man is 10 quadrillion times stronger than the strongest man on Earth. “Not as strong as superman but still impressive,” complemented Starlight impressed. Boomstick: See, and you guys all thought you'd never see He-Man pound a pussy. “Damn it Boomstick!” screamed Rarity with blazing red cheeks. “HA!” laughed Pinkie Pie. Wiz: The winner is He-Man. (*He-Man!*) He-Man: Remember kids, it is very important to always get your pets spayed and neutered... otherwise it may lead to unstable behavior and unauthorized breeding. Battle Cat: Rawr, I miss my balls. “Poor Cringer…” whimpered Fluttershy. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ “Quick, to the box,” Spike said, jumping onto Twilight’s back. Rolling her eyes but smiling slightly, Twilight walked over to glowing box as Pinkie opened it. “What did we get this time, Pinkie?” Twilight asked as her pink friend dived into the box. A moment later, Pinkie stuck her head out and said, “We got toys this time” while pulling out a few action figures. “Sweet,” Spike said, getting off Twilight’s back and running towards the box. “Is there anything else?” Rainbow and Rarity asked at the same time. Pinkie’s head goes back into the box but reemerges a second later and says, “Nope. Just toys.” The rest of the girls accepted it and took a couple of them as everypony left the castle. Rainbow flew to the nearest cloud and began to relax, thinking about the next Death Battle and many more to come. It didn’t take her long to get comfortable enough to fall asleep there as she dreamed of running with a few of the speediest characters from Death Battle. She was just about to catch up to her favorite blue hedgehog when something hit. Waking up from her dream, Rainbow looked around to see that she was near Sweet Apple Acres and that Applejack was throwing apples at her. Flying to her farmer friend, Rainbow landed in front her and asked, “What’s the big idea, AJ?” “All right, the battle is over. You've had your fun, know give me the darn key!” Applejack demanded. Rainbow giggled. “Sure thing, just look under your hat!” And with that she flew off. Applejack’s eye twitched as she slowly took off her hat… and taped to the inside was none other than the key to the lock. She stared at the inside of her hat for a full minute, complete and utter rage building up within her to the point where she didn't even notice for a little sister approaching her. “Hey sis! We finally got all the pears down!” Applebloom smiled, only to notice her sister's enraged look. “Uh… sis? What's wrong-” “SON OF A-” (Two hours of angry swearing later) “So… can y'all tell me what all those words meant?” Applebloom asked her big brother as they ate dinner. “Eeenope.” Big Mac replied firmly. “Aww…” whined the little filly. “And have yah learned yer lesson about watching yer mouth in front of yer little sister?” Granny Smith asked angrily. In the corner of the room was Applejack, who was sitting on a stool with a sign hanging on the wall next to her that read "timeout corner"… with a bar of soap in her mouth. “MmmHmm…” She grumbled. (And so ends another day with our Heroes, but while they go about their day something else was happening of great importance and that could decide the fate of the world…) “Ow!ow!ow!ow!ow!ow! FUCKING OW BITCH!” screamed Deadman as Harmony was on his back, bending his legs backwards. “WHAT WAS THAT?” Harmony yelled, twisting Deadman’s ankles. “AHHHHH! Trepp, Discord help!” screamed Deadman but as soon as he looked towards his fellow chaos gods for help all he saw was the two looking at something in great interest. “Play the one with the keyboard again,” Trepp said said to Discord, with his back turned as the two were on a laptop. “What are you guys… WAIT YOU TWO ARE WATCHING CAT VIDEOS AGAIN AREN'T YOU!?” screamed the fiery god in anger, but only got a deadpanned look from Trepp as his answer. “... Just play the video, he’s just gonna yell at us anyways,” Trepp said, getting a nod from Discord who played another video of a cat playing the keyboard. “SON OF A BITCH!” screamed deadman in pain as Harmony continued his punishment. “Ok, I think that enough Harmony,” said a voice. Everyone turned to see a knight in black and gold armor with white trimming and a cape just standing there. “Hello Alpha,” Trepp said respectfully. “Hello Trepp, Discord, Harmony and Deadman,” the now named Alpha said, floating towards the group. “So what are you doing here?” asked the Goddess as she put more pressure onto Deadman’s legs getting a scream from said mad god as a result. “It was voted that I should make sure that you don’t destroy Deadman here,” Alpha said, getting between the two of them. “You’re defending him?” Harmony asked in disbelief. “OH THANK YOU,” Deadman said, trying to get up despite the pain he was feeling. Alpha shook his head and said, “I’m not defending him. I’m just here to make sure that nothing upsets the order of the universe.” “But this moron has already done that,” Harmony said, pointing at the chaos god. “That maybe true but he’s still doing his job to bring change to the world and not upset the balance. Like a certain chaos god we know,” Alpha said, glancing at the innocently whistling draconius. “But… But,” Harmony tried to say. “But nothing, Harmony. He’s still doing his job and you can only punish him if he goes out of his way to destroy your world,” Alpha said, not backing down. Harmony stared at the knight for a moment before sighing and said, “Very well Alpha.” “Now then, I believe we should all discuss on what to do next,” declared Alpha as the rest of the godly group gathered to discuss on what to do next. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ CHAPTER END! NEXT TIME M.BISON VS. SHAO-KAHN! Shao Kahn vs. M. Bison.It was a new day For Twilight and her friends as they prepared for the next episode. They all felt a little uneasy with the trailer they saw yesterday but decided to pay it no mind. They were getting the snack table ready as they took a seat. “Well let’s get this episode started,” Twilight said, grabbing the remote with her magic. Before she could press play, a bright light engulfs the room causing everyone to close their eyes. “Ow,” a familiar refined voice said. “What hit me?” “Get off of me this instant,” an old voice yelled. “Why am I in this infernal contraption?” a dual sounding voice hissed. “Ow, where are we?” a bubbly voiced asked. “Maybe if you get off of me then we could find out, you taco brained simpleton,” A brash voice growled. “Girls, be quiet. I'm trying to figure out what just happened,” A seductive voice said. “I would like to know why’re you all on top of me,” a regal male voice yelled. As the light died down, the seven ponies and one dragon see a strange sight in front of them. They could see Discord, Chrysalis, Tirek and three unknown ponies on top of Sombra. “Sombra, Discord?” the eight friends said, confused by the turn of events. The two looked at the ones that called their names as Discord said, “Wasn’t expecting this.” “Neither was I. Now can somepony help me up, I'm feeling my back getting crushed,” Sombra said, trying to pull himself out of the pile. Discord floats into the air and snaps his fingers causing Sombra to disappear and reappear next to Rarity. Sombra looked at Discord and said, “My thanks.” “Okay, now can someone tell me what’s going on and why Tirek and Chrysalis are here,” Rainbow yelled, getting ready to fight as the ones in the pile were untangling themselves. Before anyone could do anything, the box near the Tv glowed and an envelope flew out of it. Twilight used her magic to grab the envelope and opened it. “What does it say, darling?” Rarity asked, not taking her eyes off their two enemies and the three unknown ponies. Twilight cleared her throat and said, “Dear Princess Reads-a-lot. For this episode, i brought some of the beings that you and your friends fought to watch this episode. Don't worry i made sure that they can't cause any trouble, so enjoy the episode. From your loving friend, Deadman.” After Twilight said that name, Starlight started to twitch while Discord was frowning. “So we have Chrysalis and Tirek here but who're those three?” Applejack asked, pointing to the three unknown ponies as Discord snapped his fingers, trapping them in a cage. Everyone looked at the three to see if there was any distinguished features. They stood side by side as a pegasus with cerulean fur and blue mane in a ponytail looked all over the place in wonder. The earth pony with pinkish fur and a purple mane in twintail fashion looked at everyone in annoyance. The last one of the group was a unicorn with yellow fur and a golden looking bush of a mane. This one looked around the castle in interest at their current situation. “I don’t know but they do look familiar,” Twilight said, trying to see if she knew them from somewhere. “Come now, Twilight. How could you forget us,” the unicorn said in a mock hurt tone. “Yeah, it hasn't been that long since the Battle of the Bands,” the pegasus said causing Twilight’s eyes to widen. “Hasn't been that long since you destroyed our gems,” the earth pony said annoyed. Twilight gasped and said, “The Dazzlings? But why do you look like that? Shouldn't you look more fish like?” “It’s mostly because of our shattered gems. Since they're destroyed, we can't stay in our natural forms. That's why we're in these forms,” the unicorn, Adagio, said nonchalantly. “Now can you tell us why we're here?” “Well according to this letter, you've been summoned here to watch Death Battle with us,” Twilight said, leading them to the couches. “Death Battle? What's that?” the pegasus, Sonata, asked while following her former enemy. “Just watch with us,” Twilight said, taking a seat. The earth pony, Aria, shrugged her shoulders and said, “Not we have anything better to do. Sunset and her friends seem to be watching a show as well.” The others all took a seat as Spike grabbed the remote and pressed play. Interlude (*Cues: Invader-Jim Johnston*) Wiz: The final boss: a nightmarish foe meant to test your skill to the fullest. Most of the former villains perked up at this while the others looked at them carefully. Boomstick: And sometimes they're just plain cheap, like Shao Kahn The Konqueror... “Now that's a title for a ruler.” Tirek smirked Wiz: ...or Master Bison of Shadaloo. “Guess he has a country or something,” Sonata said, munching on some popcorn. Boomstick: He's Wiz and I'm Boomstick. Wiz: And it's our job to analyze their weapons, armor, and skills to find out who would win a DEATH BATTLE. “This could be interesting,” Adagio said, looking at the screen with a slight smile. Tirek didn't say it but he agreed with the former siren as did Chrysalis. Shao Kahn (*Cues: Soul Chamber - Mortal Kombat 9*) Boomstick: Shao Kahn is the evil ruler of Outworld, conqueror of worlds, and owner of one of the most badass voices ever. Excluding yours truly of course. Shao Kahn: Ah, Too easy. “We heard better,” everyone said at the same time. (*Cues: Main Menu - Mortal Kombat 9*) Background Full Name: Emperor Shao Kahn the Konqueror Age: Over 10,000 years Height: 218 cm / 7'2" Weight: 181 kg / 400 Ibs Occupation: Emperor of Outworld Former ambassador of Elder Gods Fighting styles: Tai Tsu, Lui He Wiz: Though it didn't start out that way. Oddly enough in a manner similar to Raiden's assignment to Earth, the Elder Gods personally selected Kahn to protect the rather bleak realm of Outworld. That surprised the group that knew about Raiden, and where wondering why someone the elder gods chose would turn evil. Boomstick: Uh, turns out it didn't really need protecting. “No kidding,” Rainbow deadpanned, looking at the bleak land of Ourworld. “It almost reminds me of my former home,” Tirek said, remembering his home. Wiz: Shao Kahn became the chief advisor to Outworld´s ancient ruler the Dragon King Onaga. Together they began a war spanning the multiverse, conquering the other realms of existence one by one. “I had the same planes as well before scorpan betrayed me,” muttered Tirek as he remembered his younger brother and all the planes he had for the both of them. Boomstick: Good choice on that one, gods. And why did they even think this guy needed a bodyguard? “Better question, why didn't the Gods send someone stronger to keep them both in line?” Twilight asked, irritated that the Gods didn't even bat an eye at Outworld’s obvious plight. (*Cues: Shao Kahn's Throne Room - Mortal Kombat 9*) Wiz: But Kahn does not like sharing power, and soon poisoned Onaga, taking the emperor´s throne as his own. Kahn: Mwhahahaha! “That cold-hearted, back-stabbin’, no-good varmint!!” Applejack shouted, enraged that he’d pull such an underhanded stunt just to gain more power. “Ah yes, gain his trust and then backstab him at his most vulnerable point.” Chuckled Tirek, giving Discord a smug look. “It worked so well on you, didn’t it?” Discord simply threw a pie at his face without looking. Aria scowled before glancing at Adagio, while she hated Adagio’s bossy attitude, she’d never go THAT far in taking over the group. Boomstick: He now rules Outworld with an iron fist, and a giant maul: the Wrath Hammer. He can summon this monstrous sledgehammer out of thin air to finish foes in seconds, or decimate whack-a-mole records! The idea of Shao Kahn playing whack-a-mole made everyone laugh except Tirek and Chrysalis. Tirek was eyeing the hammer and wondering if something like that could've helped him. Arsenal Wrath Hammer Can be summoned from thin air Far larger than real mauls Requires superhuman strength to wield Sometimes used as throwing weapon Sword of Shao Kahn Only seen in that crappy TV show “There was a tv show?” asked Rainbow Dash. “Something best left forgotten,” muttered Pinkie Pie with Discord nodding in agreement. Wiz: He is a master of the dark arts, and often uses his magic to enhance his lethal attacks or create energy constructs of weapons, just as deadly as the real thing. He has even used his sorcery to manipulate and erase the minds of others. The sirens looked at his abilities in great interest as they watched this titan plow through his opponents. Sorcery Minor telekinesis Brainwashing Teleportation Can summon weapons Creates energy weapons Soul manipulation Boomstick: It's like magic Vegas “Ahh~ Vegas, so many fond memories,” sighed the Sirens as they remember feeding on so much negative emotion in just one casino. Wiz: He can also access his inner beast to transform into...this thing... (Movie Shao Kahn transforms into a very poorly CGd multi-headed dragon) “What. the. fuck?” Adagio gawked at the atrocity she was seeing. “I don’t want to see that anymore,” Sonata whimpered as she hid behind a green looking Aria. “OK, EW.” Sombra shivered, covering his eyes. “That’s disturbing even by MY standards.” Chrysalis said, visibly sickened by the grotesque display. “KILL IT WITH FIRE!” shouted Tirek. “Is it wrong i agree with them?” asked Rainbow Dash to her friends who could only shrug in response. Boomstick: Quick! Make me forget that shit! Wiz: Right, never happened! “Oh thank god,” sighed the sirens in relief. (*Cues: The Tower - Motral Kombat 9*) Wiz: Now, despite living in a completely separate dimension, Shao Kahn is well versed in two variants of Chinese Kung Fu: Tai Tzu and Liu He, which generally focus on powerful strikes and solid defense. “So he’s a walking fortress,” commented Rarity. “(scoff) more like a tank,” muttered Aria. Boomstick: He mixes these arts with his magic for a move set that´s all about absolutely obliterating his opponent. He rams people with charging spikes, and even shoots fireballs from his mouth, and laser beams from his eyes. “Laser beams!?” shouted out an excited Spike thinking how cool it would be to shoot lazers from his eyes. Wiz: And if his foe gets the upper hand, he can deflect any kind of projectiles back with his mystical Emperor´s Shield. “Would have been useful in our fight,” Tirek said, glare at the purple princess who stuck her tongue out. Move Set Charging Spikes Upward Shoulder Light Spear Explosive Ball Mystic Choke Emperor's Shield Eye Beams Soulnado Boomstick: And of course he always finishes his fights with a brutal fatality and an epic one-liner. The screen then changed to display Shao Kahn standing next to a familiar face. “Is that… Kratos?” Rainbow asked, surprised to see the previous Death Battle contestant again. Shao Kahn laughed, then proceeded to jab his hands into the middle of Kratos’ torso and slowly ripped his body in half right down the middle. Shao Kahn: Is that your best? Everyone stared at the display in shock and horror. “I… I think I’m gonna be sick...” Starlight whispered as she turned green. Fluttershy immediately fainted. Rarity quickly pulled out fainting couch for her to rest on. “Woo-ho-ho! Brutal!” Chrysalis cheered. “I agree, it’s quite impressive.” Tirek commented. “I takes a lot of raw power to rip someone apart so effortlessly like that...” “Guy's got style,” Aria simply said, enjoying the carnage. (*Cues: The Graveyard - Mortal Kombat 9*) Boomstick: He's A living tank, bulldozing down anyone dumb enough to get in his way. He's taken deadly blows time and time again and keeps getting back up, more pissed off than anything else. Wiz: But while his tenacity may be his biggest strength, his arrogance is easily his biggest weakness. Shao Kahn: You will die- (Liu Kang kicks him in the face) The group of heroes laughed at that. “Typical villains, always running their mouths before they’ve won.” Spike chuckled. Said typical villains that were in the room looked away in embarrassment knowing that the young drake was telling the truth. (*Cues: The Temple - Mortal Kombat 9*) Wiz: His endurance and longevity stems from his ability to steal the souls of others. Devouring a soul grants him longer life and the inherited power attributed to the victim. He is not a perfect conqueror, as he is restricted to the rules set by the Elder Gods. In order to invade a realm, Kahn´s chosen warriors must defeat the defenders ten times in a row in the form of a tournament of Mortal Kombat, held every fifty years; which he was doing pretty well, until he came to Earth. “Earth always seems to be a dead end for villains,” laughed Rainbow Dash getting a glare from Adagio and Aria both knowing the pains of being living in said dead end of a world. Boomstick: But even after losing the battle for Earth he just outsmarted the Elder Gods and eventually outlasted every other combatant to achieve the power of Armageddon...until Raiden reversed time cause he's a sore loser. “Bah! You heroes always pull something like that when you're about to lose,” scoffed Tirek in annoyance. Getting a nod from chrysalis. “That or get last minute help from annoying bacon haired singers…” muttered Adagio getting some strange glances from most of the group, a glare from Twilight, and an amused one from Aria. “But didn't you say one time that you wouldn't mind taking Sunset to broom closet and ro-!” asked Sonata before she was interrupted by a blushing Adagio placing a hoof against her mouth and giving her a heated stare. WIz: But his proudest accomplishment is his takeover of Edenia, the most powerful and respected realm of all. And as trophies for this victory, Kahn took Edenian’s queen and princess, as his own wife and daughter. “That’s horrible,” Fluttershy said, hugging Doomguy plushie to her chest. Boomstick: Hehe, nice! “We would have done the same,” Sonata said, thinking of having a boy serve her tacos. “More like have a cook,” Aria quietly said. “We should talk to Rarity about getting outfits like those two,” Adagio said, remembering the details of the humans outfits. Those outfits seemed to fit her style if she ever got one in her color. Shao Kahn: I am Shao Kahn! Conqueror of Worlds! You will taste no victory. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ While the main group and one redeemed Sombra and Discord found Shao Kahn to be a brute and a monster, the rest of the group thought he was a impressive ruler and deserved the title of conqueror. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ M. Bison (*Cues: Unknown Theme*) Wiz: M. Bison is the psychopathic founder and leader of the Shadaloo criminal regime. He is extremely wealthy, socially powerful, and public enemy number one of the Allied Nations. Boomstick: Oh, so the M means Master. “I would of never would've guessed,” mocked Rarity. “Really Rarity? Wow i guess you're not as smart as i thought,” said Pinkie Pie completely missing Rarity’s sarcasm. Background Full Name: Unknown Age: 59 years Height: 180 cm / 5'11" Weight: 70 kg / 154 Ibs Occupation: Dictator Fighting style: Shadaloo-ISM Raised by gypsies Trained in Soul Power Wiz: Well, yes and no. In Japan, M. Bison is really named Vega. Our Vega's name is actually Balrog. And Balrog the Boxer goes by the full name of Mike Bison. “That seems confusing,” Rarity said, wrapping her head around the names. “They probably have a good reason for the name changes,” Applejack said, rolling her eyes. Boomstick: I get it! Like Mike Tyson! Why was that a big enough deal to change all the names to... (The screen shows the year 1991. which the same year Street Fighter II released overseas, and Mike arrested for a scandal he did…) That caused quite a few members of the group to wince and the rest to look away from the screen awkwardly. Boomstick/the group:Oh. (*Cues: Unknown Theme*) Wiz: Anyway, after murdering his own parents at a young age “WHAT?!” Most of the group exclaimed in horror. “What kind of a sicko kills his own parents?!” Tirek was about to raise his hands but decided against it. Wiz: ...he was found and raised by a tribe of nomadic gypsies. Boomstick: Wait, are we still talking about Tyson? “No you simpleton,” Sombra said annoyed by Boomstick already. Wiz: The gypsy leader took Bison under her wing, and trained him in the art of Soul Power, an ancient art of utilizing the very essence of one's soul as a tool. “Fascinating,” muttered Twilight, Starlight, and Sombra as the three thought of multiple ways that it could be used. Boomstick: But since Bison's kind of a prick, he quickly mastered Soul Power, and began developing his own, much better version. “I have a bad feeling about this…” whispered Fluttershy as she held her plushie closer for safety. Wiz: See, Bison realized his soul was composed of two halves: one good, one evil. He forcefully dispelled all the goodness from his soul, thus pioneering one of the most destructive energies in fictional history: Psycho Power. Bison: This place shall become your grave! Psycho Power Soul used as destructive energy Only uses negative energies Telekinesis Flight Brainwashing Soul transference Destructive to user's body (*Cues: Unknown Theme*) Wiz: Yes, he literally weaponized his soul. “Seriously?!” Rainbow asked, gawking at such a revelation. “Is that possible?! Is there a spell like that?!” “W-Well, there haven’t been any records of a spell-” Twilight explained. “If there is, I must find it, and master it.” Tirek mumbled to himself. “Indeed, such a power would be quite useful…” Agreed Chrysalis. “But wait, what happen to his good soul?” Sonata asked curiously. “I mean, all that energy had to go somewhere, right?” Wiz: And uh, weird little thing, that good part of his soul. It physically manifested into a woman, named Rose. Everyone blinked at this. “How does THAT work?” Adagio scoffed. “So what, if I expel all my good energy is it gonna turn into a hot guy or something?” Wiz: Bison quickly built his criminal empire, with the intent of taking over the world, one day at a time. Bison: The day Bison graced your village was the most important day of your life. But for me, it was Tuesday. (*Cues: Street Fighter II: Turbo - M. Bison Theme Remix*) Boomstick: Hahaha, fan service! “Nice!” agreed Adagio as she gave off a wicked grin. Wiz: But it turns out his true motives are not even close to what you would expect. That had the group wondering what he meant by that. Bison: The governments of Earth are polluting the planet and obliterating its natural resources. Shadaloo will step them out and rule this planet! That caught the group by surprise and before they could say anything, something even stranger happened… Boomstick began to sing. Boomstick: (sings) Master Bison. He's our hero. Gonna take pollution down to zero. They then see something that leaves them stunned; They see Master Bison's head with frown on his face, on the body of some kind of superhero like character in a pose that reminded the main group of superman when he’s flying. The pose combined with the frown makes Bison look ridiculous along with Boomstick's cheesy singing in the background causes Rainbow Dash, Pinkie Pie, Sonata, and Discord to burst out laughing. Wiz: His Psycho Power... Boomstick (Singing and the Captain Bison flying around): Gonna help him! Conquer the world! Are a group of guys who like to kung fu bitches! This causes the rest of the group to join in on the laughter as they laughed until tears ran down their faces. (*Cues: Street Fighter IV - M. Bison Theme*) Wiz: ...his Psycho Power is immensely powerful and adaptable. Bison can use it for flight, telekinesis, teleportation and even psychic brainwashing, which has become quite a hobby of his. “A hobby we are well versed in,” bragged Adagio grinning along with her sisters. Boomstick: With Psycho Power he developed his own unique fighting style: Shadoloooooo-ism! “What-ism?” asked a confused Applejack. Wiz: Shadaloo-ism focuses on speed and destructive force over all else. Made possible by such moves as the Psycho Cannon, the Head Stomp, a scissor kick... Boomstick: And that cheap-ass slide kick. Over and over and over again! “Stop with the slide kick!” raged Pinkie Pie. WIz: As well as his deadliest attack the Psycho Crusher, which at full power can kill a normal human being in one shot. M. Bison is extremely cocky, considering himself no less than a god. And for good reason. He has been impaled, electrocuted, shot point-blank, crushed underneath a building, yet could resume the fight like nothing happened. “...... I could do better,” muttered Tirek. “Ya but only after you jack up on stolen magic,” snarked Twilight. Getting a few laughs from the rest of the group. Boomstick: The only Street Fighter who was able to pretty much put him down single-handedly was Akuma . But the Raging Demon is supposed to destroy a person's soul, yet Bison´s soul survived to fight another day. That impressed the part of the group that new who Akuma was and wondered how he was able to pull that off. Wiz: Psycho Power only has one major flaw. Bison's human body cannot contain its full potential, and will eventually break down. Fortunately for Bison, he can transfer his soul into other compatible bodies once his current one is used up. Move Set Psycho Cannon Psycho Field Scissor Kick Head Stomp Somersault Skull Diver Bison Warp [Teleport] Psycho Crusher (*Cues: Street Fighter Alpha 3 - Final Bison Theme*) Boomstick: But even if that fails, Bison says, "Screw caution!" and busts out one last trick. His ultimate form: Final Bison. “It’s just a wardrobe change,” remarked Starlight. Hoping for a cooler transformation. “Yeah, big whoop. Like changing clothes can give you more power,” Rainbow and Aria said at the same time. Wiz: The Final Bison form unleashes the Psycho Power´s full potential. Sure, it completely mutilates his body, but its sheer power practically guarantees victory. Final M. Bison AKA True Bison, Shin Bison Accesses the full potential of Psycho Power Unlimited super meter in game Little physical improvement No measurable time limit Somehow changes clothes Will eventually destroy Bison's body Boomstick: So who gives a shit? Wiz: Especially since he can always posses some other helpless victim´s body when he´s done. Boomstick: Told you. He´s a prick! “No arguments here,” said most of the group. Completely agreeing with Boomsticks statement. Bison: Yes, yes I killed your father. What is it with you women anyway? I killed my father too and you don't hear me whining about it! “That would be pretty strange if he did,” Sonata said with everyone agreeing with her. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ As the main group with Discord and Sombra felt that the two fighters were two evil to root for and the Dazzlings were more interested in just watching the fight, that only left Tirek and Chrysalis to choose someone to root for. Shao Kahn: Tirek. M. Bison: Chrysalis ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Wiz: Alright, the combatants are set. Let's end this debate once and for all Boomstick: It's time for a Death Battle! Death Battle (*Cues: Mortal Kombat: Armageddon - Belltower*) Shao Kahn witnesses two Tarkatan doing Mortal Kombat. Bison teleports out of nowhere and grabs one of the Tarkatan. M. Bison: Kneel before my Psycho Power! “There goes that guy,” Aria said, getting into the battle. The Tarkatan in his hand then screams before being disintegrated by M. Bison's Psycho Power. Shao Kahn jumps from his throne and smashes the second Tarkatan and enters the battle, Mortal Kombat style. Shao Kahn: Prepare to die. “Guess they don’t care about those guys,” Applejack said, feeling sorry for the two that just died. M. Bison: Hehehehe. FIGHT! Bison attempts a scissor kick, but is blocked and gets punched before sent flying with a hit from the Charging Spikes. Shao Kahn: Too easy. Kahn tosses his Wrath Hammer, but Bison teleports behind Kahn, without him noticing. Bison charges his fist with Psycho Power and punches Kahn in the face, then knocks him to the ground with a slide kick. Kahn retaliates and spits out a green fireball at Bison, but misses and the latter does the Psycho Crusher, then slams Kahn into the ground. M. Bison: Worthless! “GO Bison!” cheered Chrysalis. Bison levitates away, then attempts to brainwash Shao Kahn. “Oh this should be good,” commented Adagio as she wanted to see some master level brainwashing. M. Bison: Just try to withstand my Psycho Power! A purple aura surrounds Shao Kahn. M. Bison *altered pitch*: Are you frightened? Grovel before me! I'll scar your soul! But Kahn is impervious to the effects and laughs. “Ha! No mind tricks will work on a mighty warrior!” cheered Tirek much to Chrysalis annoyance. Shao Kahn: You are nothing. He then attacks Bison, sending him flying then uses the Charging Spikes in midair until Bison teleports away. Kahn throws an ethereal spear, which Bison dematerialized through then reforms and does a Head Stomp, which gets blocked. Bison does a Skull Crusher Dive but is knocked away by the Wrath Hammer. However, Bison quickly returns to the fight and does two scissors kicks followed by his enhanced Psycho Crusher, Nightmare Booster. M. Bison: Nightmare Booster! In the process, M. Bison smashes Shao Kahn through the walls of the fortress, then ascends upward. He then teleports, preparing the final phase of his super. M. Bison: This place shall become your grave! M. Bison falls downward, stomping Shao Kahn into the ground, then jumps further away. The group was wide eyed from the vicious combo and Tirek was starting to get worried that he would lose the bet. M. Bison: Utter scum! Shao Kahn gets up. Shao Kahn: Is that your best? “T-that didn’t even phase him,” stuttered out Applejack as the rest of the group stared wide at the unharmed conqueror. “Well Bisons fucked,” Sonata casually Commented, getting wide eyed looks from her sisters. Bison, in anger, sends a volley of Psycho Cannons at Kahn, but are reflected by the latter's Emperor´s Shield. The entire volley hits M. Bison and send him crashing into a pillar. Kahn jumps forward, impales Bison with an energy spear, then proceeds to beat him up with incredibly powerful punches. Shao Kahn: Feel the wrath of Shao Kahn! Kahn kicks Bison straight through the pillar, which sends him flying into another that falls and crushes Bison underneath. Shao Kahn: Flawless Victory! M. Bison: My Psycho Power knows no limits! (*Cues: Street Fighter 2 SNES - M. Bison Theme*) Bison bursts out of the rubble in his Final Bison form, in the violet flames that is his Psycho Power aura. “Here comes the costume change,” Aria said, not interested in this powerup. M. Bison: Death awaits! Bison does a powered-up version of Psycho Crusher and smashes Shao Kahn to the ground. As he gets up, Bison does a series of teleporting attacks until Shao Kahn throws a perfect punch and hits Bison and sends him flying. Shao Kahn then throws a barrage of Charging Spikes at Bison, eventually bringing him to the ground. Shao Kahn summons his hammer and smashes Bison over the head four times before he reverts back to normal Bison. Shao Kahn then picks up M. Bison and rips him in half. “Whoa-ho-ho-ho! HARDCORE!” cheered Pinkie Pie. (*Cues: Mortal Kombat 9 - Fatality theme*) Shao Kahn: Fatality! Bison's soul then materializes, floating upward. M. Bison: Bah! Puny garbage. “Guess he’s not done yet,” Starlight said, somewhat impressed. Shao Kahn then unleashes his Soulnado, which M. Bison's soul is slowly absorbed into. “Oh ya… the whole soul eating thing… forgot about that,” muttered Sombra. M. Bison: NOOOOOOOOOOO! Shao Kahn: Mwahahahaha! K.O.! Shao Kahn begins testing his new-found Psycho Power, floating up into the air, then firing multiple Psycho Cannons to his left and right, the last of which he fires at M. Bison's corpse, destroying it. “Well… shit,” thought most of the group as they saw Shao Kahn play with his new powers. Results (*Cues: Courtyard - Mortal Kombat Deception*) Boomstick: That can't be good. “No really?” The Dazzlings said sarcastically. Wiz: While Bison is one of the deadliest Street Fighters, and surviving the raging demon proves that he can protect his soul, Shao Kahn's thousands of years of combat experiences combined with his brutal tenacity ultimately triumphed. Also, Kahn's otherworldly makeup means it's extremely unlikely Bison's soul could possess him if given the chance. “So it was stacked against Bison from the start,” muttered Twilight as she thought of every little detail from this episode. Boomstick: And Kahn is no stranger to brainwashing. Hell, he used it on his own wife and daughter for years! Not to mention Bison's soul fueled Psycho Power isn't the best weapon against somebody who eats souls for breakfast. “That's like trying to fight Twilight with Hay burgers,” teased Rainbow Dash, getting some laughter from mostly everyone and a glare from a blushing Twilight. “DASH!” cried the embarrassed Twilight which got even more laughter from the group. Wiz: Shao Kahn has gained power from every soul he's devoured, by the rules of Mortal Kombat and assuming the possibility of losses, Kahn has consumed at least 60 billion souls over 10,000 years. That got the group all wide eyed at the possibility the ruler of outworld actually devouring that many souls. Boomstick: Looks like Kahn had a "soul-lution" for Bison. “.... that was terrible.” groaned out Tirek as he felt a pain worse then anything Tartarus could dish out. Wiz: The winner is Shao Kahn. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Boomstick: *singing* Maser Bison! He's our hero! Gonna take pollution down to zero! Gonna help him conquer the world! Are a group of guys who like to kung fu bitches! We're in Shadaloo! And you can be in too! Taking over our planet is the thing to do! (A bunch of children, who are Captain Planet's teammate’s heads replaced by Shadaloo members.) Looting and polluting is not the way but here's what Master Bison has to say! The Power is mine! *Evil laughter* Boomstick: Oh wait. Nevermind, Shao Kahn killed me. Now it's his power, I guess. Shao Kahn: You weak pathetic fool! Mwhahahaha! “.... dammit Boomstick.” muttered Rarity. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Boomstick: Next time on Death Battle. We cut to a scene of two ninjas under a full moon facing off each other and begin to charge and they raise their swords and slash down. RYU HAYABUSA! VS. *Tching, tching, tching!* STRIDER HIRYU! “So cool~!” cheered out Dash, Pinkie, Spike, and Sonata all at once. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Tirek looked at Chrysalis, smugly, and said, “I told you Kahn would win.” “Yes, yes. The all mighty conqueror won against the terrorist. You don’t have to rub it in,” Chrysalis growled. Before she could say anything else, Twilight and her group walked over to a glowing box, pecking the former queen’s confusion. “What’re you doing?” Twilight looked at the two and said, “After each episode, this box gives us some stuff.” “Mostly comics,” Rainbow and Pinkie said at the same time. Fuck you guys... “We do get other stuff. Just come and see,” Twilight said, waving them over. The two villains looked at each other and shrugged while joining the group. Pinkie opened the box and said, “Wow.” “Oh? What’s inside?” Adagio asked in mild interest. Behind her, Aria smacked her face while Adagio rolled her eyes. “Are there tacos in there?” Sonata asked, getting excited for her favorite food. “Nope, just a couple of hats, some clothes, a few figures and comic,” Pinkie said, pulling out a few familiar hats that Tirek and Chrysalis took. Tirek took a replica of Shao Kahn’s helmet while Chrysalis took M. Bison's hat. “I’ll be taking this,” Tirek and, putting the helmet on his head and making him look a bit intimidating. “As will I,” the former queen said, making the hat fit on her head. While the two were admiring their new headwear, the former sirens were looking at the clothes and saw that they were like the ones that Shao Kahn’s wife and daughter wore. The searched for the tags and saw that they were in their own sizes. “At least we got something good out of this,” Aria said, yawning a bit. “Aw, you know you had fun, Aria,” Sonata said, bouncing on her hooves. “Well now we have a new outfit as well besides our hoodies,” Adagio said, imaging how she looks in this outfit. “And i’m sure it will turn a few heads, especially the heads with bacon hair,” commented a disembodied voice. Freaking out most of the group except Discord who could only roll his eyes in annoyance. “What’re you doing here?” Discord asked grumpily. “Well I do have to take the extra baggage back where they belong.” answered the voice. If it heard the annoyance in Discord’s voice it obviously didn’t show it. “SO you’ve been bumped to delivery boy? Don’t know if that a good thing or now,” Discord said, rolling his eyes once more. “Um, what’s going on?” Fluttershy asked, carefully looking around. “Yeah and who’s talking?” Applejack asked, feeling lost for some reason. “I guess there’s no other way around this. Ahem, filles, dragon and everything else, may I introduce Deadman,” Discord said, twirling his arm a bit. Starlight’s eyes began to twitch at the mention of her tormentor's name. And as soon as Discord’s little introduction was finished, the ground began to shake and if someone were to look outside they would see thunderclouds forming in the sky as random pegasus scrambled to get the weather under control. “What the buck? I don’t remember the weather changing for today,” Rainbow said as Fluttershy hid behind her. And as fast as it came the weather cleared up and the ground shaking, leaving the group confused on what happened. “What the fuc-.” Adagio was about to curse but the sound of a load POP! Interrupted her and drew everyone's attention to the magic box and what they saw confused them more the Boomsticks singing. Floating above the box was a crimson Flame the size of a baseball with a jagged smile and sharp eyes that you would find on a jack-o-lantern. “Um, what is it?” Twilight asked, looking at the fireball. “It’s as I said. This is Deadman, a chaos god,” Discord said as if he was mildly annoyed. The group look at the small flame with a critical eye but waited to see what it could really do. Who knows it might be a small flame but could also have knowledge far greater than even Celestia herself. “...” the flame stayed silent as the group leaned in waiting for it to give out it’s words of wisdom. “Yo,” the small flame spoke in a lazy matter that would make a sirten Blue chaos god proud. Causing most of the group to sweat drop at such a lazy response. “This is a chaos god?” Rarity asked, squinting a little bit. “I expected something like Discord, not a match light,” Spike said, not believing it. “I’m sorry sir if you're not satisfied with the product then please call our customer support. 1-800-go eat a dick,” shot back the little flame shocking the group. “How revolting,” Rarity gasped. “Don’t talk to Spike like that,” Twilight said to the flame. “Meh,” scoffed the flame showing that it didn't take the princess of friendship seriously. “As much I would love to see you fight Deadman here, I need to know why you’re here,” Discord said, looking at the flame. He knew the chaos god wouldn’t go anywhere without a reason. “Like i said to take the extra baggage back where it belongs,” said the flame as it looked at the direction of todays guest. “And who’s the extra baggage?” Adagio asked, wanting to see where this could go. “Well miss legs for days, i’m here to take you all back to your rightful place,” answered the chaos flame. “You mean in Canterlot city? And thanks,” Adagio said to the god. “But we lived here before,” Sonata said, frowning a little bit. Aria said nothing as she didn’t really care where she went as long as they had food. “Sorry my little sirens but your a lot safer there than in this world,” replied the small flame with a hint of gentleness in it’s voice that caught even Discord by surprise. The Dazzlings nodded as Discord pointed at the two hatted villains said, “And these two? You gonna take them as well?” “Well of course! The former queen needs to go on a life journey and tartarus will want their prisoner back,” said the flame with a carefree voice. “I’d like to see you try,” Chrysalis said, blasting a beam of magic at the flame. Much to the shock to the rest of the group. But as soon as the beam hit it seem to just meld into the fire and make it grow for a few seconds, like gelsolin being poured into a camp fire. “(belch!) that was a spicy a meatball!” cheered the small flame as it belched out a cloud of smoke. “What but how? I put all of my magic into that beam,” Chrysalis said, backing up a bit. The fact that the flame seemed untouched frightened her to no end. “How did you absorb it?” Tirek asked, trying to get closer to the flame. Tirek just had the idea that if he could get close enough to the flame then he could absorb the magic and escape. But before he could get close enough a fist made of flame smashed into him causing him to slide across the floor and collide into Crystalis and having them both end up in a broken heap. “Fuck you that's how,” answered the flame with a flat tone. “But that’s not a good answer,” Twilight asked, trying to comprehend what’s going on. “She’s right, now what’re you really?” Aria asked, surprising her sister at how calm and bored she was. “As much as i love love talking about myself i really need to get you back to where you all belong sooo~!” sang the chaos god every member of the guest party all disappeared with a Pop sound leaving only the main group and two chaos beings and even they soon disappeared leaving a group of confused mares and one dragon behind. “Well, that was a thing. I say we watch the next episode to forget about this,” Spike said, holding a Shao Kahn figure in his claw and taking a seat. The girls looked at each other and shrugged as they sat down for the next episode. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ CHAPTER END! Next time RYU HAYABUSA VS. STRIDER HIRYU! Ryu Hayabusa vs Strider Hiryu.Spike was about to push the play button when a doorbell rang. Confused, Spike asked, “Um… What was that?” “That was a doorbell but why did we hear that? We don’t have a doorbell,” Twilight said, trying to understand what was going on. The net moment she looked at Pinkie and said, “You installed a doorbell, didn’t you?” “Yup,” Pinkie said cheerfully. Twilight was just about to ask when she did it but kept her mouth shut. It was better to not to ask since Pinkie was involved. Instead Twilight said, “Who could be at the door?” Walk over to the front door, Twilight opened it to see someone she wasn’t even expecting. Standing in front of the door and wearing golden armor was the blue dragon princess Ember. “Princess Ember? What’re you doing here?” Twilight asked, shocked by her sudden appearance. “Hello Twilight Sparkle. I came by to pay Spike a visit,” Ember said while smiling. “May I come in?” “Of course. I’m sure Spike’ll be happy to see you,” Twilight said, allowing the dragon princess to enter. They walked back into the viewing room as Twilight said, “Spike, you have a visitor.” “Who could be here for me?” Spike asked, turning towards the door as his eyes went wide. “Princess Ember!!” Spike said, jumping off the couch and running towards his dragon friend. “Hello Spike, it’s good to see you,” Ember said, giving the smaller dragon a hug. “How’ve you been since the Gauntlet?” “I’ve been good. Just been helping Twilight and watching this new show we got,” Spike said, drawing Ember’s attention. “A show? What’s that?” Ember asked, curious about this thing that Spike likes. “Oh it’s a cool show where they talk about two characters and have them fight to the death,” Spike said, peaking Ember’s interest. “That sounds interesting, could I watch one with you?” Ember asked, letting go of the smaller dragon. “Can she Twilight?” Spike asked his sister/mother/friend hopefully. Twilight looked at her friends, who all had smiles on their faces, and said, “As Pinkie would say, the more the merrier.” “You got that right,” the party pony said, jumping on the couch. The princesses and dragon walked to the couch and took a seat as Spike pressed play on the remote. Interlude (*Cues: Invader - Jim Johnston*) Wiz: Ninjutsu. Originally created by farmers to kill their oppressive samurai lords, the ninja has become one of the deadliest killers in history. Boomstick: Like Ryu Hayabusa, the ultimate Dragon Ninja. “A Dragon Ninja?!” Spike exclaimed with stars in his eyes while Ember smirked, pride evident in her eyes. Wiz: And Strider Hiryu, the high-tech mercenary. “A mercenary? This should be interesting,” Applejack said, scratching her chin. Boomstick: He's Wiz and I'm Boomstick... Wiz: And it's our job to analyze their weapons, armor and skills, to find out who would win a death battle. Ryu Hayabusa (*Cues: Ninja Gaiden (NES) - Main Theme (Orchestral)*) Wiz: His name literally meaning Dragon Falcon- “Now that's a badass name!” Rainbow Dash smiled. “Totally!” Spike agreed, giving her a fist/hoof-bump while Ember nodded. Background Height: 179 cm / 5'10" Weight: 78 kg / 172 Lbs Age: 25 AKA Dragon Ninja & Master Ninja Occupation: Antique stop owner Animal Spirit: Peregrine Falcon Hobbies: Mountain climbing, fishing, eating sushi, kicking ass. Wiz: Ryu Hayabusa was born in the Dragon-lineage legacy, and trained in the ways of the ninja from the moment he could crawl. Boomstick: How are you supposed to keep a baby in their crib when they can freakin' back-flip out of it? “You think that’s hard? Try keeping a baby unicorn and pegasus from flying all over the house.” Pinkie shuddered, remembering the first time she babysat the Cake twins. “(giggle) well Ryu sure fits the dragon part of his name when it comes to being a little trouble maker,” laughed Ember as it's a well known fact that young hatchlings make it their mission in life to stress out their parents by constantly trying to crawl or even fly out of the nest to explore the new world they are born in. Wiz: A prodigy in the art of combat, Ryu far exceeded his clan's expectations. When he turned 18, he donned the traditional blue garb, (*Cues: The Night of Lukifell - Ninja Gaiden*) Wiz: then single-handedly defeated both the criminal cult of Nostradamus and the army of Emperor Garuda. That bit on info gained both some stunned looks from the group and even some looks of respect from a few members of the group like Rainbow Dash and Ember. Boomstick: And that was before his father gave him the Dragon Sword: a single-edged katana carved from the fang of a dragon which, when combined with the mystical eye of the dragon, becomes a divine blade of ultimate power. “Wait, he uses the body parts of a Dragon as weapons?” Spike asked, unnerved by the sudden revelation. “...that's kinda gruesome.” Fluttershy stated in a equally repulsed tone. “*Pfft!* don’t be such sissies.” scoffed Ember as she rolled her eye’s at the two’s reaction. “But Ember! They use dragon body parts!” yelled Spike, witch got a scoff from his fellow dragon. “Let fill you in on something Spike,” said the young dragon lord. “It’s dragon custom to make weapons and armor out of our fallen brothers and sisters, heck it’s a sign of honor to see another race use dragon made weapons because it shows even other races know of our strength.” stated Ember to a wide-eyed Spike and a giddy Twilight as she wrote everything down on a notepad. “So fascinating!” cheered The the Princess of Friendship as she wrote down every last detail from embers little lecture. While Rainbow Dash started wondering if she could get her hooves on some dragon armor. Wiz: It also has one serious security system. If someone other than a strong-willed Hayabusa attempts to wield it, the true Dragon Sword will feed on and eventually devour their soul. That got everyone even Ember to wince at such a deadly security system, not even the elements of harmony or even the dragon scepter had that kind of defence against thieves. True Dragon Sword Hayabusa clan heirloom Carved from a dragon fang Eye of the Dragon unleashes sword's full power Divine blade Practically indestructible Weak-willed cannot wield it True power is said to upset the balance of a peaceful world. Boomstick: I need that kind of tech for my car! Teach those damn caddy-smashing raptors a lesson. That got some laughs from the main group while Ember was wondering what the heck was a caddy. (*Cues: Ninja Gaiden - Main Theme*) Wiz: In addition Ryu has an enormous arsenal of various weaponry, including the Lunar Staff, Falcon's Talons, a Kusari-gana, basically a chain sickle, numerous types of, shurikens, bombs, bows, etc., etc. and the Eclipse Scythe: a weapon forged by werewolves and quenched in the blood of living human beings. Because some people just have to do things the hard way. Arsenal Lunar Staff Falcon's Talons Kusari-gama Shurikens Regular, explosive, & windmill Fiend's Bane Bow Smoke Bomb Vigoorian Flail Eclipse Scythe Tonfas War Hammer Howling Cannon Dragon's Claw & Tiger's Fang Spear Gun Nunchaku Bare fists While most of the group marveled at the vast array of weapons, the rest of the group grimaced at the gruesome backstory of the eclipse scythe. Boomstick: (cough) The badass way Wiz. “Damn straight!” Rainbow Dash smirked. Boomstick: And if that wasn't enough, he´s also a magician! But instead of pulling rabbits out of a hat, it´s a fire dragon! “Awesome!” cheered Dash Pinkie Pie, Spike, and even Ember at the sight of the fire dragon. Wiz: Uh, no, though that would make one impressive party trick. Pinkie immediately pulled out a notebook and started writing the idea down, much to Applejack’s horror. “Wiz, you’ve gone and doomed us all.” She whispered. (*Cues: Unknown Theme*) Wiz: Ryu channels the energies of his unusually strong spirit for mystical techniques called Ninpo. This got the Twilight and Starlight invested at the prospect of even more forms of different magic. Boomstick: Well this ninpogician can summon fireballs, create a fighting shadow of himself, blow shit up with his own version of the Torn Sky Blast, and even seems to be able to teleport short distances-what the fuck, did he just turn into a bird?! “Yay!” cheered Fluttershy as she sees Ryu turn into a majestic bird. “How!?” Asked Ember, Applejack, and Spike, both gawking at the transformation. Wiz: Ryu's spirit is so unnaturally strong he can manipulate that spiritual energy to perform supernatural feats: like the bird thing, and surviving fatal wounds, though this pseudo-healing factor requires a lot of time, rest, and meditation to pull off. “I guess this ninpo has it’s limits,” commented Applejack. Ninpo Art of the Inferno Art of the Fire Wheels Doppelgänger Blink (Teleport) Art of Divine Life Art of Substitution Art of the Piercing Void Hayabusa Torn Sky Blast (Hayabusa falls from the sky, grabs onto an armed goon, then lands while stabbing him. Ryu then removes his sword from the goon's body, splattering it.) “Sweet,” Ember said with a whistle. “Swift yet deadly, I like this guy!” Chuckled Rainbow Dash. “Careful, you’ll make a certain blue boy jealous!” Pinkie giggled, prompting the rainbow-maned pegasus to pull out her notebook. “I mean, how’s Soarin gonna compete with a ninja?” Pinkie continued, causing her to slowly put the book away. “You get a pass...” She mumbled. (*Cues: Dead or Alive 2 - The Shooted*) Boomstick: Ryu is fast enough to deflect automatic fire, tough enough to land a 300-meter drop, and has developed a ninja sense, which anticipates danger. Like when a chick asks if she looks fat in a new outfit. “Of course YOU would need something like that Boomstick,” muttered Rarity with an eye roll. Wiz: And despite mastering the ninja art of stealth, he tends to just rush in, swords swinging. Every. Single. Time. “Pfft! Who needs stealth anyway?” asked Rainbow Dash, getting a few blank stares from her friends. “Ninjas.” stated Fluttershy with a dry tone. Boomstick: Hey, whatever works. He´s destroyed entire armies of fiends and demons, killed the Dark Dragon, twice somehow, won the second Dead Or Alive tournament, avenged his father's death and finally annihilated the Devil himself, all just to get himself laid. Feats Won the 2nd DOA tournament Survived the Grip of Murder Lands 300 meter drops regularly Has slain demons & dragons Defeated Dark Dragon, Doku, Tengu, Jaquio & the Goddess Single-handedly battles demons, monsters, robots, & armies for a living “I highly doubt that's the reason,” deadpanned Twilight. Ryu: Such selfish arrogance... I cannot allow this! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ The group had to admit that Ryu was a cool and honorable warrior and a few like Rarity had taken a liking to him. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Strider Hiryu (*Cues: Strider - Stage 1 Theme then cues【Nam Kap】 Defense Sphere (1Stage Demo) ~ Step into (1Stage BGM1) 【BGM】*) Wiz: His name literally meaning Flying Dragon- “Another insanely awesome name!” Spike rejoiced, excited and proud that both combatant’s names emphasized the awesomeness of Dragons. “Of course!” Ember proudly proclaimed. “Anything that has “Dragon” in it’s name is amazing by default. Dragon Blade, Dragon Fist, Dragon Dance...” Pinkie giggled perversely. “Oh! How about Dragon di-” “Finish that sentence and I’ll incinerate you!” Ember growled. “-ctionary…?” Pinkie finished with a nervous tone. Wiz: Hiryu was orphaned at a very young age. He was put through the intense Strider program, a training school for high-tech ninja mercenaries. Background Height: 179 cm / 5'10" Weight: 85 kg / 187 Ibs Age: 2,021 years Rank: Special-A Class Strider Occupation: Retired Superhuman senses Hobbies: Peace, seclusion, boring stuff Boomstick: It's so hard to find a good cyber-ninja school these days. “I wish we had a cyber ninja school,” pouted Rainbow Dash. “Ah doubt we’d have the tech or the budget for somthin’ like that...” Applejack said, sounding slightly disappointed herself. Wiz: Seems whoever put him there made the right choice. (*Cues: Strider Hiryu Theme - Ultimate Marvel vs Capcom 3*) Wiz: Hiryu far exceeded his teachers´ expectations, and soon became the youngest student in the organization's history to reach the highest rank of Special A-Class Strider. The group was yet again impressed with how the two fighters were both young prodigies who surpassed all expectations and became the legends they are now today. Boomstick: What does that mean? Well, even a C-Class Strider has the strength and skill of a whole team of special forces, so just imagine what a Special A-Class Strider can do. Oh wait, you don't have to ‘cause we're here to tell you about it! “Oh well! I wasn’t planning to use my brain today anyway,” joked Pinkie Pie getting a few laughs from her friends. Wiz: After reaching this remarkable rank, Hiryu was sent on a mission to kill a rogue Strider, who just so happened to be his own sister. “WHAT!?” screamed the group while the more sensitive of the group were about to cry from the memory of the teenage mutant ninja turtles episode. Boomstick: Naturally, pissed off at the Striders manipulating him and his sister, he immediately retired... after killing her, of course. “B-but why!?” Yelled a confused Applejack. “She was more likely still a threat to the world and he had no choice,” answered Ember with a pitying look for the cyber ninja. (*Cues: Destroy the Terrorists in the Occupied City - Strider 2*) Wiz: Hiryu wields a deadly lightsword Cypher named Falchion. It generates a blade of high voltage plasma energy which can slice through almost anything. Today, plasma cutters can reach temperatures over 2 million degrees Celsius, cutting through steel and other metals with ease. “Only my father has been known to breath fire that hot,” statet Ember. Impressed that Hiryu had a weapon that could match her father's legendary fire breath. “And Celestia is one of the two fire users that can create magic fire that hot,” committed Twilight. “Who’s the second?” asked Starlight. “Sunset,” answered Twilight thinking about her friend from another world. Boomstick: It's basically a super-long extending lightsaber. Wiz: Well, kind of, it´s a sword with a plasma aura that leaves a trail of death. It can also fire plasma arrows and counter projectiles. “Hot dang! Those things are versatile!” said an impressed Applejack. Boomstick: All with an incredibly satisfying shing sound. (*Strider swings Cypher*) Boomstick: That's the one. “Oooh~ such a good sound!” moaned Pinkie Pie. “I’d like that sound to off when I use my claws!” Spike smirked. Falchion Light Sword Cypher Extendable through plasma charging Boost [Plasma wave projectiles] Plasma arrows Deflects projectiles Shape-shifting properties Can destroy projectiles Incinerates opponents (*Cues: Burning Force - Namco X Capcom*) Wiz: Apart from the Cypher, Hiryu wields a large arsenal of sci-fi gear and weaponry, including the Varga: a teleporting device. He uses his medical tech to heal wounds, the climb sickles to, well, climb, the jump trick to... jump higher. “The naming is… simplistic,” said Rarity, trying to be nice. Boomstick: I guess they don't have a thesaurus at the ninja school. “BLASPHEMY!!” Twilight screamed in anger as she went into her Rainbow Form, startling the rest of the group. “ALL SCHOOLS SHOULD HAVE A THESAURUS!!” When she noticed everyone staring at her she immediately calmed down and turned back to normal. “Ehehe… sorry...” “...she’s scary when she’s mad.” Ember whispered to Spike, feeling a bit more respect for the Princess of Friendship. “You should’ve seen her when Tirek blew up her library.” Spike shuddered. Boomstick: He also has a device that can cause earthquakes, shoot fire and launch big balls of electricity. “He’s a walking weapons arsenal!” Gawked Rainbow Dash. Weaponry Kunai Fire Trick Launches a fireball Ground Trick Creates a small quake Spark Trick Launches a ball of electric energy Spark Ball: Sends it along the ground Wiz: And last, but not least, he has three types of cybernetic drones at his back and call. Option A are twin satellite bots which shield Hiryu and shoot wave after wave of deadly laser discs. “Those sound neat,” commented Twilight liking option A a lot. “Maybe I could build one...” Boomstick: Option B is a Robo-Panther. It´s like a giant death-cat that doesn't need a litter box or scratch the shit out of your furniture. Applejack giggled at this. “Hey Rarity, Ah think we found Opal’s replacement!” Rarity rolled her eyes at her southern friend. “Oh haha.” Wiz: Finally, Option C is a robotic hawk with bladed wings and over sized grenades. Boomstick: Argh, I hate birds! Now they have grenades. “What’s wrong with birds? Birds are nice.” Fluttershy said. “Ah’d rather not have to deal with any grenade-tossing birds.” Applejack stated. “It’s bad enough they hover over our picnics all the time...” Options Option A Satellite drone "Bot" Laser guns Can power machinery Option B Robotic panther Fiercely loyal Option C Robotic hawk Bladed wings Can drop grenades Wiz: Hiryu´s speed and agility are off the charts. Fortunate, since he also doesn't seems to ever use his ninja stealth skills. He´s even fast enough to dodge shadow tag bullets: highly advanced ammunition designed to track supersonic targets, like Striders. Basically, anti-aircraft rounds for people. “And he’s able to dodge weapons made for the sole purpose of killing him!?” yelled an amazed Starlight. Boomstick: He´s also strong enough to slice clean through the human body... with a karate chop!!! “WOAH!” Rainbow, Ember, and Spike exclaimed, impressed by the sheer power and speed this man possessed. Wiz: Hiryu has somehow been in retirement for over 2,000 years; likely because of the advanced medicine of the future. Yet despite distancing himself from the Strider program, (*Cues: Strider Hiryu Theme - Marvel vs Capcom*) Wiz: he has been pulled out of retirement more times than John McClane. “Can’t they just leave him in peace?” asked Fluttershy feeling bad for the cyber ninja. Boomstick: He's fought dinosaurs and giant robots, destroyed a moon-sized space station, and is so badass he considers huge flying warships mere toys. He even slew the magical creator of the world... twice. Apparently God is no match for this future ninja. Feats Avoided shadow tag bullets Has slain armies & dinosaurs Is over 2,000 years old Destroyed a moon-sized space station Slices people with bare hands Defeated Matic, Faceas Clay, Striders & Grandmaster Meio Strider Hiryu: No place for amateurs. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Wiz: Alright. The combatants are set. Let's end this debate once and for all. Boomstick: It's time for a Death Battle! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ The teams so far are. Ryu Hayabusa: Spike, Applejack, Rarity, Fluttershy. Strider Hiryu: Twilight, Starlight, Pinkie Pie, Rainbow Dash. Ember liked them both. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Death Battle (*Cues: Ninja Gaiden - Alma Saves Rachel*) An armed soldier stands in a building under construction as both Hayabusa and Hiryu appear and kill him with a slash from their swords. “That's one way to start a fight i guess,” commented Twilight with a flat look. Already getting desensitized by all the death she’s seen throughout the show. Soldier: (Wilhelm scream) “Poor Wilhelm,” sighed out Pinkie Pie. feeling bad for the voice that will always be known for death. Hayabusa and Strider then jump backwards into a fighting pose. FIGHT! (*Cues: Ninja Gaiden - Alma Awakened*) Ryu jumps backwards and throws three shurikens at Hiryu but misses as he slides under them and ambushes Ryu, slashing him towards a wall. Hayabusa bounces off the wall and hits Hiryu with his True Dragon Sword and causes him to fall down. Ryu bears down on Hiryu with his sword several times, and then Hiryu cartwheels over Hayabusa. Hiryu slashes at Ryu, but he blocks it and throws a Boomerang Shuriken at Hiryu, who cartwheels over him again. Hiryu dodges the Shuriken flying past him and jumps over, starts slashing at Ryu multiple times, and after cartwheeling over him again, slices the flying Shuriken in half. Hayabusa slashes at Hiryu multiple times with the Dragon Sword and successfully kicks him into the wall. Hiryu bounces off the wall, but Ryu catches him in midair and pile drives Hiryu into the ground. Ryu pulls out his Eclipse Scythe. He attempts to kill Hiryu with it but Hiryu teleports out of the way, and cleanly removes the scythe's blade with his Cypher. “Not the awesome Scythe!” cried Rainbow Dash. “(scoff) How ironic that a weapon that took human sacrifices to be made was destroyed by a man made weapon,” scoffed Applejack finding it fitting that an evil weapon like that was finally destroyed. Hayabusa jumps back and pulls out a Whip Chain. He swings it, and throws it at Hiryu with precision, but Hiryu decimates it into two dozen embers of metal with a combo of slashes. “Hiryu is just cleaving through Ryu’s defences!” gasped out Starlight seeing weapons that would be considered masterpieces in combat and high grade magic being torn apart by Hiryu’s man made weapons. Ryu charges his Ninpo and an ethereal shadow of himself appears. The two continuously attack Hiryu with their swords until Hiryu summons his satellite drones. Strider Hiryu: Back off! As the satellite bots fire their laser discs, Ryu jumps forward, dodging them, and destroys the drones with a well-aimed shuriken. “But Ryu is still holding on and still going strong!” cheered Rarity. (*Cues: Dead Or Alive 5: Last Round - Ryu's Determination*) Ryu lands and fires a high-speed wave of arrows. Hiryu dodges the arrows. Ryu prepares to fire an arrow with a bomb attached to it, but Hiryu's plasma Cypher destroys Ryu´s bow. Hiryu charges at Ryu and slashes but misses as Ryu teleports. Ryu appears behind him and prepares his Torn Sky Blast. Hiryu is hit by the blast and is sent to another room. Hayabusa tries to stab Hiryu in the neck but he jumps over, and uses his sickles to climb the wall, dodging the first attack and slashing at the second. Both ninjas attack each other, doing fight combos as they fly up the building. Strider Hiryu is knocked upward, seemingly the last person hit. “Man look at them go!” cheered Applejack getting more excited as the battle continued. Ember agreed with the southern mare with a nod as she continued to watch the two warriors fight. “It’s like stories my father used to tell me about two dragons fighting for the title of dragon lord.” (*Cues: Ninja Gaiden - Alma Awakened*) Then Hiryu uses his medical tech to heal as Ryu Hayabusa heals with his ninpo. Then both prepare to fire their blasts and when they connect, it causes a small explosion, knocking both back. Hiryu is pushed back further and is about to summon his robotic animals. "go animal friends," cheered Fluttershy. Strider Hiryu: There's no escape! Legion! As his robotic animals charge at Ryu, Hayabusa destroys them all with a single combo. He attacks but Hiryu jumps out of the way and fires his Cypher´s plasma arrows. Ryu flips past them and jumps on a crane. Hiryu flies up the same crane as Ryu throws several fireballs at him. (*Cues: Ninja Gaiden - Chapter Clear*) Hiryu disperses them by swinging his sword. Ryu jumps on top of the crane after him. (*Cues: Ninja Gaiden - Orchestral Compilation*) Both ninjas stand, staring at each other, then both run towards each other, jumping forward, and swinging their swords once. The group leaned in to watch what was no doubt the deciding strike the would decide the fate of the two fighters. They both land on the ground. There are a few seconds of silence until Hayabusa is wounded, bleeding. Team Ryu winced as they saw the warrior of the Hayabusa clan stood there stunned from the deadly wound inflicted on him. (*Cues: Beasts - Strider*) Strider Hiryu: Time to end this! Ragnarok! “What a cool name!” cheered Spike. Strider blitz Ryu at every angle with the Varja, then pile drives Hayabusa straight through the roof and keeps going through all of its stories to the base of the skyscraper. The deed done, Strider Hiryu vanishes. K.O.! As one of Hiryu's hawks drops a grenade on Ryu, Strider Hiryu leaves the building using his glider. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Results (*Cues: Strider Hiryu's Theme - Marvel vs Capcom*) Boomstick: Ragnar-owned! Wiz: This fight was very close, and Ryu's ninpo was certainly a match for Hiryu's gadgets. Boomstick: But Ryu's enormous arsenal was useless against the Cypher. It was hard to fight that statement after the group clearly saw the Cypher cleave through Ryu’s weapons and magic. Wiz: The only weapon that can stand up to the Cypher was his True Dragon Sword, but even then, while it can cut through people like butter, Hiryu does the same with his bare hands. “So awesome,” whispered Ember. Boomstick: This guy can make a wicked sandwich. Also while Ryu can deflect automatic fire, Strider can dodge personalized anti-aircraft bullets. “Again another guy i would like to have a fight with,” commented Rainbow Dash with a grin. Wiz: If you consider the differences in speed, this means Hiryu is at least 43% faster. Ultimately, Hiryu surpasses Ryu in strength, speed, and weaponry. “Things were just stacked against Ryu from the beginning,” concluded Starlight. Boomstick: Looks like Strider just floored Hayabusa. Wiz: The winner is Strider Hiryu. “Man that was awesome!” cheered Ember. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Boomstick: Next time on Death Battle. ?: I'll teach you to behave! Announcer: *Singing* KIller! Killer! Boy, she's a killer! “.... Why do I have the feeling i’m going to hate this episode?” muttered Rarity. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ “Quick, to the box,” Rainbow and Pinkie said at the same time, running towards the glowing box as the others calmly walked over. Ember followed the group unsure of why they needed to go to the box. Seeing Ember’s confusion, Twilight said, “When we started watching the show, after each episode this box would give us a few things that related to the characters.” “And what kinds of stuff do you get?” Ember asked, generally interested. “We get comics, toys, some clothes and even…” Twilight said, naming a few things they got. “Ninja clothes!!” Pinkie said, waving around a bunch of clothes in different colors. She handed a different color set to everyone as Spike jumped into the box. “Aw yeah, my own ninja outfit. This is awesome,” Rainbow Dash said, trying on her blue outfit already. “Might not be a ninja but this is some fancy looking clothes,” Applejack said looking at her own orange outfit. She’ll have to save this for when she needs to sneak someplace. “The material used for this is top notch quality. It feels so light yet sturdy,” Rarity said, examining her own white ninja outfit. Fluttershy put her pink ninja outfit in her saddle bag with Doomguy Plushie. Ember walked towards the box and popped it as Sike popped out at the same moment. Looking at the younger dragon, she saw that her was holding a wooden box in his claws and pushing it into her own claws. “I found that with your name on it,” the baby dragon said cheerfully. The dragon princess looked at the box to see that her ae was on the box. Setting it down on the ground, Ember opened the box and marveled at the contents inside. From what she could see, the box had a neatly folded black ninja outfit, a small number of shurikens, a ninjato and an old weathered book titled “The Art of Ninjutsu.” “My word,” Ember said as she picked up the book and started to skim through it. She could see that the book had a wealth of knowledge as the pages showed different tactics and weapons that were used. Closing the book, she put it back into the box and closed it up. “Got something good?” Twilight asked as Spike in a black ninja outfit climbed on her back. “Indeed I did, but I must be going,” Ember said sadly, holding the box under her arm. “You sure you can’t stay for more?” Spike asked. Shaking her head, Ember said, “I’m sorry Spike, but I must head home.” “... You will come back, right?” Spike asked, looking a bit down. “Of course I’l come back. We’re friends and I would like to spend more time with you,” Ember said, walking towards Spike and giving him a quick hug. “Until next time, Spike,” she said while walking out the door. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Later ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Ember was sitting down on the cave floor, studying the book on how to correctly use the ninjato. Setting the book down on the table, Ember grabbed the sword with both hands and held it in front of her. Taking a quick glance at the book, she started to correct her stance by moving her blade at waist level. With another quick glance, Ember moved her feet to the right position as the book showed her. Taking a deep breathe, Ember slowly raised the sword above her head and brought it down the very next moment. She repeated this process a few times before she decided to try something out. She returned the sword to her original position as she bent her legs slightly and jumped into the air. While Ember was airborne, she did a simple front flip and landed on one foot with the other raised and said, “Hiyah.” Not that far from Ember was the previous dragon lord Torch, who was sleeping. Hearing the ruckus of his successor, he opened his eyes in time to see her land in a ridiculous pose. Rolling his eyes but smiling, the old dragon lord went back to sleep and dreamt of his daughter making him proud. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ CHAPTER END! NEXT TIME IVY VS ORCHID! Ivy vs Orchid.It was a new day for our heroes as they did the same thing they’ve been doing for the last few days. Sit on their plots and watch the next episode of Death Battle. Not like they have anything better to do. “I have a bad feeling about this episode,” Rarity said as everyone took a seat on the couch. “What makes you say that, Rarity?” Rainbow Dash said, grabbing the tub of popcorn. “It’s just that the preview from yesterday,” Rarity said, looking away from her friends. “Oh c’mon silly filly. It’s not like anything bad’s gonna happen,” Pinkie said nonchalantly, waving her hoof around. “I mean it’s not like something crazy is gonna happen today.” There was a flash of light, blinding everyone in the room. While the girls and dragon tried to adjust to their surroundings, they heard a very familiar voice. A familiar voice that filled most of the occupants with dread and one with anger. “I'M BACK, BITCHES!” the voice said causing everyone to groan. “What’re you doing here, Deadman?” Twilight asked, her vision returning to her. What she saw wasn’t just the small jack-o-lantern like flame but the Dazzlings in their pony forms in front of them. “Just here to drop off the guest stars,” muttered the chaos flame as he placed the three sirens on the couch. “And we appreciate it,” Adagio said, leaning back into seat. The other former sirens grabbed a hooffull of snack and started to eat. “Yeah, we had fun the last time,” Sonata said, eating a chocolate mousse truffle. “And Adagio wanted to see more of this stuff so she could seduce-” Aria began to say as Adagio put her hoof in the pink pony’s mouth. “Ha ha ha. Pay her no mind,” Adagio said, laughing nervously. “Heh well whatever, I’ll see after the episode. Deadman OUT!” yelled the chaos god as he disappeared in a bright flash Everyone was prepared this time as they covered their eyes before the flash went off. Once the light died down, Twilight sighed as she grabbed the remote and pressed play. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Interlude (*Cues: Invader - Jim Johnston*) Wiz: When it comes to the tantalizing femme fatale, these two combatants are the pinnacle of beauty and brawn... not to mention well endowed. “Oh Celestia why…” muttered Rarity get getting some grins from the sirens already thinking of a way of making this even more fun. Boomstick: Ivy from Soul Calibur... Wiz: ...And... Boomstick: *interrupting* ...Black Orchid from Killer Instinct! Sorry, I'm excited! “So are we~” Adagio giggeld. Wiz: I'm Wiz and he's Boomstick and it's our job to analyze their weapons, armor, and skills to find out who would win a Death Battle. Ivy Valentine (*Cues: Unblessed Soul (Ivy's Theme) - Soul Calibur*) Ivy: Behave. Behave! “Oh, I'll behave!” Sonata cooed while Rarity groaned. “Only if she “rewards” me later~!” Wiz: Left on the doorstep of a London mansion, the infant Isabella was adopted and raised by the noble house of Valentine. Background Full name: Countess Isabella Valentine Height: 177.8 cm / 5'10" Weight: 58 kg / 128 Ibs Age: 49 [Physically 32] Hometown: London Daughter of Cervantes Fighting Style: Self-taught A dominatrix for no real reason Boomstick: Little did they know she'd grow up to be this deadly dominatrix. Oh-ho, daddy must be so proud. Aria smirked at Boomstick’s depiction of her. “Mmhm~ I know how proud I'd be!” “...ugh,” sighed Rarity already knowing this was going to be a long episode. Wiz: Well, he's dead, so there's that. Both her father and mother died while searching for the legendary Soul Edge, leaving Isabella, or Ivy, as their sole legacy. Her only remaining parent is her birth father, the pirate Cervantes... who is a zombie... sometimes. The screen suddenly changed to show both Cervantes as a zombie in Soul Calibur 4 and his human form in the 5th game. “Wait, how does that work? Was he resurrected between games or something?” Spike asked in confusion. “It’s possible but we’ll never know unless he fights on this show,” Starlight said, shrugging her shoulders. Boomstick: Well then, good call on the baby dumpster donation. Zombie pirates don't make good fathers. Believe me, I know. Wiz (and the rest of the group): ...What? Boomstick: Ivy also has some awfully great, uhuhuhum... magic. “Yes…. “magic”, hmhmhm~” Adagio giggled perversely with her sisters. Rarity bit her lip, trying her best not to lose her temper. “*Snicker*This is going to be great,” snickered Rainbow Dash along with Pinkie Pie. Wiz: Her father was a skilled alchemist, and Ivy took up his research to find and destroy Soul Edge. She taught herself summoning and alchemy rituals, which she used to forge her unique sword: the Valentine. Magic Alchemy Lab-based Instrumental in creating her snake sword Not typically for combat Used in some special moves Summoning magic Sphere traps Magic fire Nightmare's hand Acasual Paradox Critical Edge Grand Alchemy Critical Finish (*Cues: Without the Blessing of Fate - Soul Calibur V*) Boomstick: The Valentine is an extendable snake sword with a stupid name. It should've been called "Deadly as Fuck", since it works just like a normal sword, but with a flick of Ivy's wrist, it turns into a nine-meter long whip of blades. It can be used in all sorts of ways, even a stealthy underground attack. “Can't say I disagree with him on the name…” Rainbow said. “I would've called it something cooler like "the viper”!” “Quite an impressive method though." Twilight said as she started taking notes. “Using magic to enhance and extend a sword like that… I might have to try it sometime.” “Aren't you already having problems with the robo-hmph!” asked Spike before his mouth was covered by a nervous twilight, getting a confused look from the rest of the group. Wiz: It is also sentient, with a mind of its own. Ivy accomplished this by summoning the hand of Nightmare, which breathed life into the sword. Boomstick: Wait, hold on. How does a hand breathe, exactly? “Yeah! That makes no sense!” Pinkie agreed. “What? Was there a mouth on its hand or something?” Wiz: Of all I've talked about, that is what you question? Anyway, since Nightmare is Soul Edge personified, this ironically joined Ivy's own fate to the very abomination she seeks to destroy. Whoops. Boomstick: I'd like to join Ivy's fate, if you know what I'm saying! “No argument there!” Aria chuckled. “I wouldn't mind being “joined” to her as well~” Adagio purred. Sonata licked her lips. “Join her in be-” “Can you three stop that?!” Rarity groaned. “It's bad enough when Boomstick does it!” “We're Sirens so… no.” Sonata stated, sticking out her tongue. “...technically you're all former Sirens.” Starlight corrected them. “Meh, Poh-tay-to, Po-tah-to.” Sonata shrugged. Applejack blinked. “Who the buck says Po-tah-to?” WIz: This curse bounded Ivy's blood to the immortal Soul Edge so thoroughly her body actually stopped aging. Boomstick: Um, actually Wiz, what I think is happening here is that her age is getting stored in her enormous rack. I mean, they just keep getting bigger and bigger as time goes by! Wiz: Well, you never know with magic. “Wait, that's possible?!” Sonata asked in shock before looking at her sisters. "You mean our boobs could've been getting bigger all those years we spent in the human world?!” Adagio was too lost in her own thoughts to listen. “If there's a spell for that, I will find it… and I will master it…” Aria rolled her eye’s but silently agreed with her sisters on that one. (*Cues: Soul Calibur II - Maze of the Blade*) Wiz: Ivy is skilled with all her sword's forms, but long-range combat is her bread and butter. She is very good at controlling the battlefield with wide whip swings, powerful kicks, and precision strikes. Valentine Snake Sword Formerly called "Ivy Blade" Alternates between sword & whip Max whip length: 9 m / 30 ft Can use Guard Impacts Can perform Edge Attacks Granted life by Soul Edge Critical Finish & Edge moves Definitely not for novice swordsmen Boomstick: I mean, let's be honest, who would really want to use that thing as a normal sword? “If you’re skilled enough, then you can use a weapon in anyway possible,” Twilight said causing the girls to look at her curiously. Seeing their gazes on her, Twilight said, “Shining told be about ponies using weapons in unorthodox ways.” “Who the heck is shining?” asked Sonata but not receiving a response causing said blue sairen to puff her cheeks in frustration. “My brother,” Twilight said happily as the Sirens got a mischievous look on their faces. Seeing the looks, Twilight quickly added, “He’s married.” “That just makes it hotter~” Sonata giggled. Wiz: She has spent most of her life seeking and destroying anything remotely related to Soul Edge, innocent or otherwise, which will eventually include herself, when all is said and done. “While i can agree that something like soul edge should be destroyed, I can’t however agree with her methods,” muttered out Twilight with narrowed eyes. Wiz: But despite having one of Soul Calibur's deadliest move sets, she has a rather spotty win/loss record. Known Win/Loss W/L - 3/4 Loss - Astaroth Loss - Taki Win - Seong Mi-na Loss - Zasalamel Win - Zasalamel rematch Loss - Cervantes Win - Cervantes rematch Boomstick: Don't they make pads for that? “Oh shut up!” Rarity snapped. The rest of the group snickered in amusement. Wiz: Still, she has defeated countless foes and accomplished impressive feats. Boomstick: Like kicking a point-blank bullet out of the air! Damn, that's fast! “DAMN!” Rainbow, Spike, and Aria exclaimed. Wiz: Well, more so insanely accurate instinct. Presumably, she's using the weight of her above-average-sized breasts as momentum to increase her speed. Boomstick: If that's a real martial art, I'm going to find it, and then teach it. “Indeed, definitely putting that on the "must learn" list!” Adagio agreed enthusiastically. Wiz: Ivy is a warrior who uses everything at her disposal. Ivy: You're in need of some discipline! Ivy grabs onto Natsu and launches her into the air while holding her in place with alchemy. Ivy: I'll teach you to behave! “TEACH US!” Sonata cheered enthusiastically. Ivy sends pieces of Valentine through Natsu before combining them together, slamming her down to the ground, then reattaching them to her sword. Ivy: Satisfied? “VERY satisfied!” The Dazzlings said in unison. Rarity buried her face in her hooves. “Why? Why did he invite them?! WHY?!” “Because i knew this would be hilarious,” Deadman’s disembodied voice answered smugly. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ The main group was torn on their thoughts. On one hand they respected ivy as a worrier and someone who wants to stop an evil like soul edge, but on the other hand she is willing to destroy anything and everyone connected to soul edge. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Black Orchid (*Cues: Black Orchid's Theme - Killer Instinct SNES*) Orchid delivers a 19 hit combo to Cinder Annoncer: Killer Combo! Wiz: The government spy code-named Black Orchid is a complete mystery. Her past, training and real name are so secret not even she knows most of it. Boomstick (and Twilight): How the hell does that work?! “Maybe self-inflicted amnesia?" Rainbow suggested that she munched on her snack. “I've read a few comics where the hero does that to hide info from the enemy…” “How does that work out?” Fluttershy asked. “Eh,” Rainbow shrugged. “Depends on the situation, sometimes it works, sometimes it comes back to bite them.” Wiz: What we do know is, she's a killer. (*Cues: Killer Instinct - Orchid Theme*) Rainbow smirked. “Now that’s a theme I’d like hear when I’m kicking butt!” Wiz: Among her limited history, she is confirmed to be sister to Jago, a prominent fighter from Tibet. Orchid's origin must share similarities, so she is most likely a practitioner of Chinese martial arts such as kung fu. “Huh? That’s neat,” muttered Adagio. “What is?” asked Twilight. “Recently Sunset has been taking martial art lessons,” answered Aria with a shrug. “She’s been taking them ever since she’s been watching this show with her friends.” “What show is that?” Asked Starlight. “Don’t know, her friends don’t trust us to be invited to watch,” muttered a sad Sonata. “Even if Sunset invites us.” Background Real name: Unknown Height: 170 cm / 5'7" Weight: 56.7 kg / 125 Ibs Age: 24 Fighting Styles: Chinese martial arts Likely Tibetan (since she was Jago's sister) Secretive government spy Prefers tonfa over lightsabers? (*Cues: Killer Instinct 2 - Kim Wu Theme*) Boomstick: Orchid's weapons of choice are heavy Chinese tonfa... made of lasers! “Lasers make everything awesome!” Rainbow, Pinkie, and Sonata cheered. Wiz: Apparently whoever she works for has figured out how to make light sabers; and Orchid wielded these early in her career before upgrading to laser tonfa. Boomstick: Tonfa are short and strong, designed for quick damage, perfect for Orchid since she is incredibly skilled in fast, close-range combat. Her other set of weapons are called T.N.A.. Tonfa Laser aura Length: 38 cm / 15 in Short range weapons Can emit fire or electricity For Okinawan martial arts Originally a handle for grinding grain Popularized as police nightsticks Wiz: Well, actually... Boomstick: I mean, just look at what she's wearing! It's not as if she trying to hide anything! Man, I wish I was that jumpsuit. “I wish I HAD that jumpsuit!” Adagio giggled, imagining the reaction she get out of a certain bacon-haired girl back in the human world. “Mind if we join in on that action?” asked a smirking Aria and laughing Sonata. Wiz: *clears throat* Orchid prefers speed over strength, with quick rapid strikes. Some moves even defy physics. Boomstick: What is she, some sort of witch? Wiz: Absolutely! Orchid´s best weapon is her trove of spells. Most useful is the Fire Cat, a transfiguration spell which morphs her body into an intangible feline of flame. “Wish I could do that,” Rainbow said, pouting at the screen. Boomstick: Aww, I wanna pet her! But I can't... cause... you know... the burning… “Poor Boomstick,” muttered Fluttershy. Moves Tonfa Fire Fire Cat Flick Flack Spinning Sword Lasaken Air-Buster (*Cues: Killer Instinct - Main Theme*) Wiz: She also uses magic in here No Mercies, finishers which can be used after an enemy is weakened. When not using her tonfa to incinerate people, she can transform them into a helpless frog. Boomstick: Smash 'em! Smash 'em! YES!! “NO!” Fluttershy cried out. “That poor froggy…” “Eww…” Rarity winced. Wiz: But she has one more weapon in her arsenal... or rather two: Boomstick: Her Fun Bags of Destruction! And you just thought I was being a pig earlier, but really whipping out the girls causes an instant heart attack to whoever views them. Orchid zips open her vest and reveals her breasts (off-screen) to T.J. Combo, who then falls over dead. TJ Combo: Whoah! Orchid: Yeah! The video was paused for a moment, courtesy of Spike, as everyone took in what they’d just witnessed… Twilight, Starlight, Rarity, Applejack and Fluttershy went slack-jawed, while Rainbow Dash, Spike, Pinkie Pie, and the Dazzlings all fell over in fits of laughter. “That… is the most… RIDICULOUS thing I've ever seen!” Rainbow gasped between laughs. “She j-j-just FLASHED HIM! And he died, just like that!” Sonata cackled, holding onto Pinkie for support. “I-I CAN’T BREATHE!!” Spike shouted as he held his stomach. “MY-MY GUT’S KILLING ME!!” “BEST. FINISHER. EVER!” Adagio shouted. No Mercies Shocker Scorcher Frog Squash Heart Attack Boomstick: I now know the way I want to die. Wiz: I never thought I'd see a lethal set of mammary glands! Boomstick: But you'd think it'd only work on people, right? NOPE! Her super-boobs can kill humans, robots, aliens, a dinosaur, and even a walking skeleton who's missing the one bone that matters. “How beautiful are those boobs?!” Sonata asked, shocked that it not only worked on people, but completely different species as well. “I must discover their secrets…” “Please stop,” Rarity begged the former siren who ignored her. Wiz: There is only one possible explanation for this. Her breasts must be so impossibly, unnaturally large that no brain can process the shock of seeing them. Even while female brains are immune to the sexual shock, they will grudgingly forfeit out of jealousy. “Damn,” the former sirens said. Boomstick: Heh-heh! Oh, she'll be crying into a tub of ice cream tonight! “... shut up,” growled Rarity, the joke hitting a little too close to home. Wiz: Black Orchid entered the first Killer Instinct tournament, intent to take down the evil UltraTech corporation from within. Boomstick: While she had some trouble with ranged characters, she eventually defeated the 2,000-year-old, and might I add, CHEAP-AS-HELL WARLORD Eyedol, winning her the whole tournament. Feats & Faults Skilled in close-range Ultra Combos Won first Killer Instinct tournament Defeated Eyedol Fought Gargos in the past Self-raised Pitiful ranged skill Traded lightsabers for tonfa-what?!? Wiz: Orchid is clearly a force to be reckoned with. Orchid unleashes a 37-hit Ultra Combo on Fulgore. Announcer(andPinkie):ULTRAAAAAAAAAA COMBOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! Orchid: Yeah! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ It was a tough choice for most of them but everyone came to a decision. Rarity, Spike, Starlight were rooting Orchid as everyone but the Dazzlings rooted for Ivy. The former sirens were neutral for um, reasons. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Wiz: Alright, our combatants are set. Let’s end this debate once and for all. Boomstick: It’s time for a DDDEEAATTTHHHHBBBBAAAATTTLLLEEEEEEEEE. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Death Battle (*Cues: Going To Where The Wind Blows - Soul Calibur*) Ivy is standing on a platform atop a large body of water when Orchid jumps down from an off-screen helicopter. Ivy leaps backward. Ivy: Get lost! FIGHT! “That’s one way to start a fight,” Applejack said. “Meh. gets to the point,” Rainbow Dash said, shrugging. (*Cues: The Book of Ivy - fan remix of No Turning Back - Soul Calibur II*) Orchid fires two tonfa blasts at Ivy, who knocks them away with the Valentine, then uses her sword to unleash long-range attacks on Orchid, who blocks them with her tonfa. Orchid then uses Fire Cat to phase through another Valentine attack and lunges toward Ivy, unleashing a Master Combo on her, ending with a fiery knee knocking Ivy into the air. “Damn,” Aria, Rainbow Dash and Applejack said at the same time. KI Announcer/Pinkie Pie: Master Combo! Ivy lands and blocks an aerial kick by Orchid, catching her off-guard and allowing her to unleash a combo of her own. After kicking Orchid away, she catches her with the Valentine, then holds her by the throat with it while putting her foot on her. Ivy: Does it hurt? “Yes Mommy. It hurts soooo good~,” Sonata moaned in her seat. “O-Oh my,” Fluttershy said, hiding her blushing face. Orchid uses Fire Cat to evade it and moves further back. Ivy uses the Valentine, but Orchid catches it with her tonfa, pulls Ivy towards her, then kicks her in the stomach. She then unleashes Heart Attack on Ivy. “It’s the final flash!” Sonata cheered. “Wrong character Sonata.” Pinkie corrected. However, Ivy is unaffected and laughs, then proceeds to do the same to her opponent. Orchid, dumbstruck by her opponent's superior breast size, throws down her tonfa in frustration and jealousy. “Woah! Guess her’s are bigger.” Adagio commented with both admiration and respect. (*Cues: Eyedol's Theme - Killer Instinct*) Ivy uses the opening to attack, but after landing a few hits, Orchid uses a Combo Breaker to reverse it before Ivy catches her tonfa with the Valentine. KI Announcer: C-C-C-Combo Breaker! Ivy strikes Orchid into the air, then uses her alchemy to hold her in place. Ivy: Spread apart! “OH COME ON!” Rarity screamed to the sky. “Oh yes~,” the Dazzlings said with blushing faces. Ivy then unleashes Grand Alchemy, sending Valentine's pieces through Orchid, who then falls to the ground, dazed. Ivy: Is that it? “I’m good for a few rounds. I need to practice to corner a certain bacon-haired girl,” Adagio cooed as everyone blushed around her. Spike was confused as he asked, “What does she-” “I’LL TELL YOU WHEN YOU’RE OLDER!!” Twilight yelled, blushing up a storm. (*Cues: Killer Instinct - Prog Metal Remix*) Ivy sends Valentine through the ground to finish her opponent, but Orchid uses Fire Cat to avoid it, then unleashes an Ultra Combo on Ivy, ending with the two in mid-air as Orchid kicks her away. KIAnnouncer:ULTRAAAAAAAAAA COMBOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! As Ivy is about to hit the ground, Orchid uses Shocker before she hits the ground, keeping her stunned when she finally lands. Orchid walks up to the stunned Ivy and then transforms her into a frog with her tonfa before jumping on Ivy, squishing her. “Froggy, NOOO!!!” Fluttershy yelled. Orchid: Yeah! K.O.! Ivy is shown twitching in her frog form before dying as Orchid stands atop a platform nearby. When Jago jumps behind her, Orchid turns around and uses Heart Attack, presumably killing him as he falls off the platform into the water below. “Guess she got two victories today,” Rainbow said as everyone chuckled. Results (*Cues: Killer Instinct (2013) - Character Selection Theme*) Boomstick: I feel sorry for the guy that has to clean that up. “Agreed,” Rarity said, feeling a little queasy. Wiz: Orchid's an unstoppable force. Her win against Eyedol proves her incredible fighting abilities. See, 2,000 years ago, not even the most powerful armies in the world could take down Eyedol, and yet Orchid did so singlehandedly. “Not so bad for a girl who can flash her udders. She could probably take on Tirek,” Applejack said, tipping her hat up. Boomstick: But since Ivy's jugs are so wonderfully huge, Orchid's flash finisher was meaningless. “And what fine jugs they are,” Aria said, licking her lips. Wiz: Ivy's cup size is officially chartered as G or quadruple-D. By measuring Orchid's waist and chest to scale, it appears hers are sized F, or triple-D, one size smaller than Ivy's. “Are we really using math to judge a woman’s teat size?” Twilight asked with a flat stare. “It is important, Sparkle. It’s for science,” Adagio said without remorse as she stared at the screen with a perverse grin. Boomstick: Oh, I have an extra “D” I could've given her. “Celestia Damn it!” screamed Rarity. Wiz: Too late. Besides, the fight ultimately came down to long-range vs. short-range combat. While Orchid has no equivalent to Ivy's Snake Sword, her Fire Cat can get in close by passing through attacks. Starlight had a thoughtful look as she muttered, “I would love to have a spell like that.” Boomstick: And tonfa are designed to block attacks and get in close. Once Orchid's in, there's no stopping her. Wiz: Plus, Ivy has no means of countering Orchid's transfigurations. Even her link to Soul Edge is useless, since it does not pertain to other magic. “Hmm… kinda like when Starscream tried to nail me with a blast meant only for electronics...” Rainbow mused. “Only… y’know, with magic” Boomstick: It was a good fight, but in the end, Ivy croaked. Sonata giggled at Boomstick’s joke along with Pinkie. Wiz: The winner is Black Orchid. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Boomstick: Next time on Death Battle. The group see three spacecrafts flying in space….and are piloted by anthropomorphic animals. Fox: We're heading out! All aircraft report. Rabbit: This is Peppy, all systems go! Toad: Don't forget me! A fourth one appears behind them. Pheasant: Slippy, what are you doing?! Hurry up! Another ship, but appears to be different,flew towards them. Toad: Don't worry. The unfamiliar ship also has a pilot. Green rabbit: Attention all hands, battlestations. Fox: Huh? ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Adagio and Aria shivered in fear when they recognized that ship. “Oh no, not this again!” “Oh...my… gosh!” Sonata squeed, smiling widely as she started cartwheeling around the room. “It’s him! They’re bringing him in!” “Uh, actually… we should probably get back to the human world…” Aria nervously stuttered as she and Adagio tried backing away. … only to be stopped by Rarity, who had an unnerving grin on her face. “Oh, nonsense girls!” She said as she pushed them back towards the tv. “Your friends seems oh-SO eager to watch the next one! It’d be impolite to deny her the joy of seeing it!” Adagio started to sweat. “Oh, we don’t have to be here for th-” “Oh but you should! You very much should! I. INSIST.” Rarity demanded, her horn glowing menacingly. Aria looked to the rest of the group for support… only to see them cowering behind Twilight, except Sonata, who was too busy bouncing around the room to notice. Adagio let out a sigh and said, “Fine. Let’s just look at the dumb box.” The ponies and dragon walked over to the glowing box, waiting for the glow to stop. Once it died down, Spike opened the box and said, “Huh?” “Is something wrong, Spike?” Rarity asked, concerned. “Yeah, what’s up? Did we get anything cool?” Rainbow Dash asked in a hopeful tone. “Well, we got the usual comics,” Spike said pulling out a stack of comics. The group groaned but took took the comics as Spike reached inside the box once more. “We also got a few figures,” Spike said, holding a few mini figures of Ivy and Black Orchid. Rainbow took one of each as the rest all split the rest between them. “And here’s a couple of wrapped packages for…. Adagio and Aria?” Spike said confused, pulling out two wrapped packages and giving them to their respective owners. “Not like I’m gonna turn down free stuff,” Aria said, removing the paper from the package. “This could be interesting,” Adagio said, ripping the wrapping off to reveal what was inside as she began to grin. In her hooves were an exact replica of Ivy’s outfit in Adagio’s hooves as Aria was holding a jumpsuit similar to Black Orchid. The sister were grinning as they thought trying them out once they got home or in Adagio’s case, who she’ll try it for. In another place A red and blonde haired girl was doing her homework in peace when she suddenly felt scared yet aroused. Confused, she continued with her work as she ignored the warning her body was giving her. Back in Equestria “Oh, I’m gonna have fun,” Adagio said, giggling to herself. Twilight, wanting to save herself from being questioned, said, “Next episode. NEXT EPISODE, NOW.” ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ CHAPTER END! NEXT TIME FOX MCCLOUD VS BUCKY O’HARE! Terminator vs Robocop.It was the start of a new day as the birds were singing and the flowers were blooming. On days like this, fillies would be playing outside with their friends. It was a perfect day for everyone to enjoy. “I OVERSLEPT.” Except for one purple dragon who was running down the castle halls to the viewing room. The reason why Spike overslept was that before he went to bed last night, he stayed up reading some of the comics he got from the box. As he got closer to the viewing room door, Spike saw that the door was starting to open. He stopped in front of the open door just as his friends started to exit the room. “Did you watch the episode, Twilight?” Spike asked, hoping that they didn’t start it. Twilight blinked owlishly while looking at her assistant/brother and asked, “Why would I be, Twilight? “Um, cause your a princess and we live in the crystal castle,” Spike said, confused by the purple mare’s answer. “I don’t live in a castle,” Twilight said, oddly cheerful. “Of course you live in a castle,” Spike said, waving his arms around. “Take a look around you, Spikey boy,” Twilight said smiling. Spike looked around to see that he wasn’t in the crystal castle but in some normal looking basement. He even saw a nice couch, table of snacks and a bunch of soda there. Turning back around, Spike didn’t see Twilight and her friends but the familiar looking fireball that just started to annoy him. “NOW IT’S TIME FOR A GUYS NIGHT OUT,” Deadman screamed causing a giant flash of light. Spike was blinded for a moment but once the light died down he found himself on the couch. “CAN’T FORGET THE OTHER PLAYERS,” Deadman said causing smaller flashes to happen with popping noises as Spike covered his eyes. After a few moments, Spike looked up to see Shining Armor, Flash Sentry, Big Mac, Thorax, a scared Sunburst and a very annoyed Discord. “Why,” Spike started to say as Deadman’s fireball form grew larger. “I BROUGHT YOU HERE TO WATCH THIS BALL DROPPING, TESTOSTERONE FILLED EPISODE OF DEATH BATTLE. So have fun, cause mayhem and eat tacos,” Deadman said as he disappeared. The ponies sat in silence until Shining asked, “What’s going on?” “Just Deadman doing his own thing,” Discord said unamused while tapping his claw against the couch armrest. “Deadman?” Shining, Sunburst, Thorax, Flash and Big Mac asked at the same time. “He's the one who gave us the Death Battle episodes and box,” Spike explained causing Shining to nod. The others looked slightly confused by this. “Death Battle? Isn't that the show you were talking about, your highness?” Flash asked, hearing how his superior was talking about it one day. “Yes, Flash it's that show. But why would he want us to be here?” Shining asked, getting a bunch of shrugs. “Probably wants us to watch the next episode,” Discord and Spike said at the same time. “The sooner we watch it, the sooner we can get out of here.” “You sure about this Spike?” Thorax asked, unsure of the situation. “That guy is crazy but he won’t hurt anyone unless he’s angry. Trust me, I’ve seen him angry,” Discord said while examining his talons. “Ok, well let’s watch it then,” Sunburst said, calming down a bit. “Ya I need to go, I was on my way to see my Marefriend right before I was taken to this place,” muttered an annoyed Flash. Spike tried to grab the remote but Discord snatched it and pressed the play button. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Interlude (*Cues: Invader - Jim Johnston*) Boomstick: Sci-fi movies have taught me two very important things. One: I want my own lightsaber. “A glowing sword would be pretty kickass…” Flash smiled. “I know right?” said Spike imagining saving Rarity with a lightsaber Boomstick: and Two: The future blows. “Tell me about it,” muttered Spike still having nightmares of all of the alternate timelines that were caused by Starlight meddling with time. Wiz: It's unavoidable, the warrior of the next millennium is the machine, such as The Terminator, the time traveling metal assassin. That caused the mortal members of the group to shudder at such a terrifying name. Boomstick: And RoboCop, Detroit's cyborg defender. This was quick to catch Shining armor and Flash’s attention. Wiz: These mechanized combatants have fought before, but never in a no-holds-barred, one-on-one duel to the death. Boomstick: Or without brand restrictions. "Wait. These two fought before?" Thorax asked. Boomstick: He's Wiz and I'm Boomstick. Wiz: And it's our job to analyze their weapons, armor and skills to find out who would win... a Death Battle. Terminator (*Cues: The Terminator (1984) - Main Theme*) Wiz: In the distant future of 2004. The government deployed the world's first automated defense network, Skynet, to keep everybody on the planet safe and happy. Everyone chuckled at that. “Don't you just love it when sci-fi films try to predict the future?” Sunburst smirked. “So we created Skynet 12 years ago huh?” Flash scoffed. “Funny how we missed that little event.” “This is what happens when we ride our hoverboards too much.” Added Thorax, causing the rest of the group to laugh. Boomstick: So. Skynet used the planet's nuclear arsenal to annihilate most of humanity and take over the world. “....oops.” Big Mac deadpanned sarcastically. “And this is what happens when you try to play god with machines” Shining stated, not noticing Spike nervously glance at the door leading to Twilight’s lab... Boomstick: The age of machines had begun. (*Cues: A Day In The Life - Terminator 3*) Wiz: To combat the remaining human resistance, Skynet developed a specialized breed of robotic soldier. Boomstick: Affectionately called the Terminator. A human skull gets crushed under a metallic foot The camera moves up and reveals the first combatant; a humanoid, metallic, robot covered in a metal exoskeleton, human-shaped feet, a head that resembles a human skull , and wielding some kind of advanced looking weapon. “Gulp.. well that’s quite intimidating,” muttered Sunburst while adjusting his glasses. “Eeyup!” agreed Big Mac along with everyone else. Wiz: Standing 6'2" and weighing almost 400 lbs, the T-850 terminator is a cybernetic organism - living tissue surrounding a hyper-alloy endoskeleton. This made the perfect disguise, capable of infiltrating enemy ranks with its human visage. “Huh kind of like how my People use to do things,” commented Thorax remembering his race’s main strategy when it came to things.. Boomstick: Basically the whole point of the Terminator was to blend in with normal people, and then kill them. Yes, because two time powerlifting champion ARNOLD SCHWARZENEGGER is totally your average guy! Once an image of a young Arnold was shown on screen the guys couldn't help but try to compare their muscles to his just to realize how much they come up short… well except Discord who could turn buff anytime he wanted. “Cheater…” the rest of the group thought, glaring at the grinning chaos spirit. Wiz: Sure, but only the Model 101 Class looked like that. The Terminator has hundreds of different possible faces. Boomstick: What was that one designed for? Attracting women and making men feel inadequate? Guy in hallway: Damn! “Anyone else suddenly feel the need to work out?” Spike asked. “Nope!” said Big Mac with a grin while flexing his muscles. “Meh my Marefriend doesn't care if i have muscles so i’m not that torn up about it,” said Flash Sentry with a shrug. (*Cues: I'll Be Back - Terminator 2: Judgement Day*) Wiz: Using time displacement equipment, the Terminator was sent back in time to stop Skynet's greatest rival, John Connor, leader of the human resistance. “Uge! Not more time shenanigans!” groaned out Spike. “You ok their Spike?” asked a worried Thorax, wondering what was wrong with his friend. The young drake took a calming breath. “It’s ok I just really hate time travel after the stuff me and Twilight went through.” Boomstick: This model was first sent to super early abort John Connor, then protect John Connor, then protect John Connor again, and then blow up this bitch. Terminator: You are terminated. The Terminator blows up himself and the T-X using his hydrogen fuel cell. “Sweeeet~!” awed out Discord while wearing some 3-D glasses. (*Cues: Trust Me - Terminator 2: Judgement Day*) Wiz: The T-850 is powered by twin hydrogen fuel cells. A single cell can last up to 120 years, but extensive damage may rupture the cell to critical condition. “Hmmm I wonder if Twily could make a safer version of those things.” muttered Shining. Boomstick: And it blows up like a small hydrogen bomb. Wiz: Similar to the explosion that brought down the Hindenburg. Boomstick: Luckily for Arnie, he can ditch a damaged cell before that happens, and he works just fine with just only one left, like Lance Armstrong, without the steroids. “Ha!” laughed Discord the only one to get the joke. Background Cyberdyne Research Systems Series 850 Model 101 Infiltration Combat Unit Manufacturer: Skynet Height: 1.88 m / 6'2" Weight: 172 kg / 380lbs Core component: Coltan Power source: 2 hydrogen fuel cells Always comes back Wiz: The Terminator is programmed with an abundance of subroutine data, including Skynet's extensive logs on all combat and weaponry throughout Earth's history. This even includes data on all previous T-800 models. Through this, he technically has more experience and skill than any human being could ever possibly achieve. Most of the group went wide eyed at this and ones like shining armor couldn't help but worry at the thought of something like the terminator attacking his loved one’s. Programming Routines Adaptability Learning machine Adapts to human behavior through observation, interaction & questions Combat & weaponry Anything within Skynet's global database Group Infiltration Human anatomy Voice mimicry Basic psychology (*Cues: Terminator 3: Rise of the Machines - T3*) Boomstick: But while he's a master in all weaponry, he does have his favorites. In the future, the Terminator wields an M-27 Phased Plasma Rifle, which is too heavy and powerful for any ordinary person to use. When the time period doesn't have any space guns lying around, his weapons of choice include a Hardballer Longslide pistol, a 12-gauge Franchi shotgun, a portable M79 Grenade Launcher, and the beautiful M134 mini-gun. Oh man, just looking at it makes me feel wonderful pants feelings. The group was left jaw dropped at the arsenal that the Terminator wielded. “Is it wrong that i’m feeling the same thing as Boomstick?” asked Spike in a daze. “It’d be weird if you didn’t,” said Discord. Arsenal M-27 Phased Plasma Rifle Bull pup configuration Helium plasma 40 watt range Too heavy for humans AMT Hardballer .45 Longslide Magazine: 7 rounds Laserlock sight Franchi SPAS-12 Shotgun Cartridge: 12 gauge Magazine: 8 + 1 rounds Pump-action & semi-auto options M79 Grenade Launcher 40x46mm grenades 6 rounds/min Max range: 400 m / 1311 ft Weight: 2.9 kg / 6.5 lbs Handheld GE M134 Minigun Caliber: 7.62x51mm NATO Rate of fire: 2,000 - 6,000 rpm Max range: 1,000m / 3,200 ft Weight: 38.6 kg / 85 lbs Wiz: Speaking of feelings, the Terminator is a learning machine, adapting to human behavior through observation and interaction. It can even learn to feel genuinely sad, which is odd since Skynet designed it to be a merciless mass murderer. “That’s… pretty dumb,” muttered out Sunburst not really seeing the point of that feature. “Maybe it helps it blend in?” suggested Thorax. John Connor: Jesus, you were gonna kill that guy! Terminator: Of course, I'm a Terminator. “It’s kind of in the name kid,” mocked Discord. John Connor: Just put up your hand and say "I swear I won't kill anyone". Terminator: I swear I will not kill anyone. (Shoots a security guard in the knees) He'll live. “Well… he’s not lying I guess,” muttered out Flash. (*Cues: Helicopter Chase - Terminator 2: Judgement Day*) Boomstick: Sad or not, The Terminator is a beast in combat. He's even taken down superior models like the next-gen T-900's, the nearly invincible T-1000, and even the T-X; which is actually an anti-Terminator. “So wait it killed it’s own terminator?” asked Shining in awe. “So cool!” said Spike. Wiz: The Terminator is a master marksman, with advance analysis, calculative, and observational tools. He can survive massive blows, power shortages, and getting dragged through an entire city. Plus, after the last T-800 was melted in a steel mill, Skynet upgraded his titanium exoskeleton to coltan, which can withstand extreme temperatures over 3000*C. Feats Smashed through a building Has tricked humans and machines alike Killed the technically superior T-900s, T-1000, and T-X Escaped liquid nitrogen freeze twice Can lift several cars Program survived and revived at T3 Successfully killed John Connor Boomstick: Why even bother making new Terminators? The T-850 is clearly the best. “Agreed,” said the group. Terminator: Hasta-La-Vista, baby. He shoots the frozen T-1000, shattering it. “I guess you can say he was put on ICE,” said Discord with a pair of Sunglasses while the rest of the group groaned in frustration from the pun. “YEAAAAAAHHHHH!” “Thanks Deadman,” thanked Discord. “No prob.” (*Cues: It's Over, Good Bye - Terminator 2: Judgment Day*) Wiz: Each Terminator is not unique, made by assembly for quick deployment. To save time, Skynet forgoes high end software protection, leaving the Terminator easily hackable. In fact, the one T-850 who protected Connor on Judgement day was reprogrammed not once, but four separate times. Just screams lazy, lazy design. The Terminator scrolls through different phrases to say and selects one. Terminator: Fuck you asshole. While most of the group were snickering at the scene shining was just shaking his head at the thought of ANY army leaving such a blaring weakness on the back bone of their army. Weakness Easily hackable Detectable by dogs Dangerous power source Sometimes defeated by humans Vulnerable to precise attacks from behind Worst fear: Hydraulic presses (*Cues: Terminator 2: Judgement Day - Main Theme*) Boomstick: But it's a little hard to hack something that can kill you with one hand in twenty million different ways. The Terminator is one of the deadliest assassins in movie history. If you get in his way, don't bother running, you're already dead. “Omae wa mō shindeiru,” muttered Discord while having some REALLY thick eyebrows and being really buff. “... am I the only one who just felt his balls drop just now?” asked Shining Armor wondering why the simple line sounded more manly than dragons and hoofball combined. “Nope!” said Big mac with a slightly deeper voice. Terminator: I'll be back. He walks out of the police station, only to come back driving a car right through the front door. “Huh well what do you know? He did come back,” commented Spike. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ While discord was impressed by the machine's ability to cause chaos through the timeline itself the rest of the group where just glad that the terminator didn't exist in their world. “My money's on the terminator he just seems like the best choice,” said Thorax. Getting nods of agreement from Spike and Big Mac. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ RoboCop (*Cues: RoboCop 1987 - Rock Shop *) Wiz: Alex J.Murphy was a good police officer with a good family, as with many good cops, that all changed when he was transferred to Detroit, Michigan. What began as a routine patrol through the city became the most important moment of Murphy's life: his death. A shotgun-wielding thug blows Murphy's hand off. Boomstick/everyone but Discord: HOLY SHIT! As Murphy screams, he is repeatedly shot by multiple thugs wielding shotguns. “Uge… I think i’m going to be sick,” muttered out a greened face Spike. Boomstick: Damn! That guy can eat more bullets than 50 Cent. (*Cues: RoboCop 1987 - Across the Board*) Wiz: Murphy would have been six feet under, if the mega corporation Omni Consumer Products had not stepped in. By privatizing Detroit's police force, OCP technically owned Murphy's corpse. “What!?” screamed the group when they heard that little tidbit of info. Background Real name: Alex J. Murphy Height: 1.83m/6'0 Weight: 155kg/342lbs Police Districts: Detroit and Delta City Codename: Beta One Daily Upkeep: $12589.17 Programmed with high-level USA police training Boomstick: That doesn't seem legal at all. “I’ll say,” growled out Shining Armor. Thinking that if someone did that to his men would get his blood boiling. Wiz: With unchecked crime on the rise, OCP's...uhh...forward thinking executive, Bob Morton proposed a bailout plan so ridiculously absurd, it just might work. (*Cues: RoboCop 1987 - Rock Shop*) Boomstick: They would rebuild Murphy. Better, stronger, with less flexibility, which of course, means robo parts. The result was one bad mother fucker: RoboCop. (Multiple scenes of RoboCop stopping crimes are shown.) The group look in awe at Robocop’s war on crime, even Discord look impressed at the metal warrior's battle to protect the peace. Bob: What are your prime objectives? RoboCop: Serve the public trust, protect the innocent, uphold the law. (He shoots through a female hostage's dress to nail a criminal in the crotch) The entire group winced at this while their hooves/claws went to their crotches. “Heheheh… Head shot,” chuckled the disembodied voice of Deadman. Boomstick: With the durability of a tank, and the firepower of a one man army, RoboCop nearly annihilated all of Detroit's street crime in just a couple of days. The man was unstoppable. Wiz: But was he man, or machine? Male Officer: This guy is really good. Female Officer: He's not a guy; he's a machine. “But he still has the soul of a man who want’s to protect,” said Flash, glaring at the female officer. (*Cues: RoboCop - The Dream*) Wiz: RoboCop is 99% artificial, but he relies on the most complicated known machinery, a human brain. Boomstick: Even after OCP tried to make him their own personal robo-pet, the man called Murphy still lived. That got some grins from the group, proud that Murphy was still in fighting the good fight. Wiz: With no family, a contorted public image, and the constant threat of deactivation by his corporate owners, the struggle to regain his humanity would consume Murphy's every waking moment, while also fighting crime, and that's just his good days. “Poor guy…” muttered Sunburst along with everyone. “Eeyup,” agreed Big Mac with a look of pity. (*Cues: Unknown Theme*) Boomstick: Fortunately, his cutting edge arsenal makes locking up the bad guys the easiest part. Housed in his nifty right leg is the custom Auto-9 machine pistol, one of the most powerful hand cannons ever made. In his left leg, he's got several tactical ordnance grenades, each with adjustable power levels. Wiz: At level three, a single ordnance can annihilate a metal security door. So just imagine what maximum level ten can do. “*chuckle*” laughed Discord liking the sound of those grenades. Boomstick: If he needs a bit more firepower, Murphy has an attachable Weapon Arm; complete with machine gun, flamethrower, and anti-tank smart bomb missile, and for those extra special moments, there's the Cobra Assault Cannon, which goes boom, and then there's no more anything. The group stared wide eyed at the vast arsenal that put the terminator's to shame. Arsenal Auto-9 Pistol Magazine: 50 rounds Standard 3 round bursts Tactical Ordnance Triggered "sticky" grenades 10 charge levels Options: Explosive, inflatable sack, electro-field Flightpack Sub-sonic speed Separate battery pack Can double as a recharge station Weapon Arm Calico M950A machine gun Magazine: 100 rounds Max range: 274 m / 900 ft Flamethrower Max range: 46 m / 150 ft Smart Bomb Anti-tank weapon Missile properties Cobra Assault Cannon 40mm armor-piercing high-explosive incendiary rounds (RoboCop shoots the ED-209 with the Cobra Assault Cannon and the top of it explodes) Sitcom Guy: I´d buy THAT for a dollar. “Me too!” cheered Spike. “Me three!” agreed Thorax, just as excited as his friend. (The legs of the defeated ED-209 fall over and then twitch) (*Cues: Unknown Theme*) Wiz: He also has a subsonic jet pack, which helps him jump sharks. Boomstick: I...I don't even... William Ray Morgan: Where's your sense of humor?! RoboCop: Right here. (RoboCop raises his fist and punches him in the face) Boomstick:...Jesus Christ “Ha! Now that's a one liner!” laughed Shining Armor. Wiz: Murphy is also equipped with state of the art hardware and software, Including a thermograph, a video recorder and a terminal strip for collecting data... Boomstick: Or for ripping out throats! Just look at that thing!! “Ouch…” winced Sunburst while rubbing his neck after seeing Robocop rip a guy's throat out with a USB flash drive. Wiz: No wonder Detroit's falling apart! All their USB flash drives can double as shivs! “Meh almost anything can be made into a shiv if you're creative enough,” bragged Discord gaining some worried looks from the rest of the group. Boomstick: Murphy´s armor is made up of carbo-ceramic-reinforced titanium, with laminated Kevlar, which basically means it'll stop pretty much anything. It's like the Pepperidge farm bread packaging of armour! RoboCop: I´m composed of titanium. I don't believe you are. (Draws the Auto nine) Your move. The entire SWAT team scatters. This caused the group to bust out laughing. “Hahahaha! This guy is awessome!” laughed Flash Sentry wiping some tears from his eye’s. (*Cues: RoboCop 1987 - Rock Shop*) Boomstick: Each leg has two rambolts, which can anchor him into the ground to stop fleeing motorboats and speeding cars. Wiz: He also has a targeting system so precise, he can catch and even shoot bullets out of thin air. “I've only heard a FEW unicorns in history that had such accuracy,” muttered out Shining Armor in awe Boomstick: Expert marksman? More like master of the impossible! Then group was shocked and enraged when they see a criminal holding a baby hostage as RoboCop is held back at the risk of the baby in jeopardy. Criminal: Don't try to follow me! RoboCop: We won't. Criminal: The baby is going with me! RoboCop: No. Criminal: I´ll kill it man! I´ll do it! I´ll fucking kill it! “Coward!” hissed out Spike as his pupils started to slit. And Thorax started to hiss like his old changeling self. RoboCop: We can't have that. “Buck him up!” cheered Big Mac in a rare form of rage. (He uses his advanced targeting to calculates the ricochet angle from a nearby steel door, then fires, hitting the criminal in the head, allowing his partner to rescue the baby) The group cheered at Murphy’s skill and for rescuing the child. Software and hardware Terminal Strip Rambolt Armor Carbo-ceramic reinforced titanium armor Laminated kevlar Thermograph Complex targeting systems Voice stress analyzer Video and audio recorder Wiz: Murphy has defeated plenty of technically superior combat machines, and endured dozens of seemingly fatal situations. He's strong enough to lift a 10-ton armored door, tough enough to survive a bazooka, brave enough to plunge into a giant nuclear plant monster thing and kill it from inside...? Boomstick: Note to self: remember to weed garden. “Agreed,” muttered Discord in agreement as he wrote that down to remember later. Wiz: And if that's not crazy enough for you, he's even rescued Sting from the Four Horsemen in WCW wrestling. Yes. This is real. “That is the coolest thing i’ve heard… of all time.” stated Shining Armor in awe. Feats Defeated ED-209, RoboCop 2, Deathspore, ED-260A, and RoboCable Tanked a building busting bomb Survived a Class-1 bio-toxin bomb Lifted a 10 ton armored door Survived a 3000 PSI hydraulic press Can catch a bullet in mid-air Rescued Sting from the Four Horsemen in WCW...seriously (*Cues: Unknown Theme*) Boomstick: Murphy may be a walking tank, but he also moves like one. He's SO SLOW!! This caused Flash Sentry to wince at the pathetic Speed that Robocop was “running” Wiz: His main function is to chase the bad guys! You´d think OCP would´ve prioritized running legs over, say, his Frisbee skills. Also, Murphy´s battery can only last about 24 hours without recharging, but consistent damage can quickly drain his power. In prolonged combat with someone his equal, Murphy is in constant danger of power failure. Boomstick: To top it off, his human parts add extra vulnerability, which is stupid because it means he can even get a common cold and... (RoboCop then sneezes what looks like a bolt of electricity, which hits the ground) “HOLY CRAP!” yelled a surprised Sunburst almost falling out of his chair. (*Cues: RoboCop 3 - Robo Saves Lewis*) Boomstick: FUCKING SNEEZE LIGHTING BOLTS OUT OF HIS FACE! It doesn't matter how many flaws he's got! RoboCop is a badass! “Agreed,” said everyone. Weaknesses Requires daily power recharge Slow mobility on foot Conflicts his own programming Not programmed for martial arts Mechanical heart weak to impacts Cannot escape liquid nitrogen freezing on his own Possesses some vulnerable human organics Owner: Nice shooting son. What's your name? RoboCop: Murphy. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ The group was getting excited for the battle. “Me and Flash are rooting for Robocop,” said Shining as everyone could understand why two royal guards would root for Robocop. “I’m going to stay neutral on this one,” stated Discord. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Wiz: All right. The combatants are set. Let's end this debate once and for all. Boomstick: It's time for a robo Death Battle! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Death Battle The scene is in a busy city (presumably Detroit). Terminator enters the area via time travel in a gun store. Salesman: Holy shit! Hey, where'd you come from? How'd you do that? Terminator: Give me your guns... and your clothes. Now! Salesman: Whoa, hey buddy, that's not really my thing. Hey... what are you doing? Don't touch that! *screams* Suddenly, an explosion occurs, blowing up most of the store and killing the salesman. “... was it really necessary to blow up the store?” asked Thorax with a deadpanned look. (*Cues: The Terminator - Title Theme*) Terminator then proceeds to exit the fiery building with all of his guns and wearing his trademark outfit, with his sunglasses being the last piece put on. “Yes, yes it was,” said Discord answering Thorax’s previous question. (*Cues: RoboCop 3 - Death Of Lewis*) RoboCop arrives in a police car in order to arrest the Terminator. RoboCop: Freeze, creep. You're under arrest. Come quietly or there'll be... *draws his Auto-9* ...trouble. “This is going to be good,” Flash said in a giddy voice. (*Cues: RoboCop 3 - Robo Fights Otomo*) The Terminator then takes out his Hardballer and analyzes RoboCop, classifying him as a cyborg with a high threat level, and noting his titanium and laminated kevlar, as well as two vital weak points: his human brain and "human heart". Terminator: Negative. Walk away if you want to live. RoboCop also analyzes his opponent, classifying him as a cyborg of unknown origin, then noting his weapons, his two hydrogen fuel cells and the danger posed if they're damaged, and Terminator's cool sunglasses. “Eyup,” Big Mac agreed with robocop's opinion on the Terminator’s sunglasses. RoboCop: You are coming with me. Alive... or dead. FIGHT! (*Cues: Terminator 3: Rise of the Machines - Terminator Tangle*) The Terminator fires his hardballer pistol, which has no affect on RoboCop. Robocop then fires multiple shots from his handcannon, which slightly staggers Terminator. Afterward, the two continuously fire their handguns as they walk towards each other. Terminator throws away his hardballer and pulls out his shotgun, then proceeds to shoots RoboCop multiple times at close range, knocking him back. “Hmmm it takes a shotgun to push back Robocop while it just takes Robocop’s hanconon to stagger the Terminator,” muttered Shining Armor as he kept a close eye on the match. Terminator: Out of my way! *fires at RoboCop* Terminator proceeds to hit RoboCop with the shotgun a few times and while Robocop attempts to counter by shooting with his handcannon, Terminator grabs his arm and evades the shots, then continues hitting him with his shotgun. RoboCop then twirls his handcannon and shoots the shotgun out of the Terminator's hand, but Terminator dominates him in hand to hand. RoboCop: Take that, criminal scum...*interrupted by punch* "HA!" laughed Discord. Then RoboCop manages to gets two hits in, the last one breaking his opponent's sunglasses. Angered, the Terminator punches him repeatedly, slams him into the ground, breaking the road, pummels him, then throws him through the window of his own police car. Terminator takes out his grenade launcher, throws up a round, catches it, and places it into the chamber as he prepares to send RoboCop off. Terminator: Hasta la vista... baby. “So cool!” cheered a starry eyed Spike. The Terminator fires his grenade launcher, completely obliterates the entire car, seemingly winning the whole battle right there. “YES” cheered team Terminator. “It’s not over yet,” said Flash with a grin. (*Cues: Unknown Theme*) However, RoboCop comes out of the wreckage with his flight pack and cobra assault cannon. RoboCop: Good news, scum. *aims cobra assault cannon* You are no longer under arrest. He fires it at the Terminator, who is knocked back. Terminator evades all of the other shots, retrieving his shotgun, and hides. As RoboCop flies around searching for his opponent, the Terminator is climbing a building. RoboCop stays floating in midair, unable to find his adversary. RoboCop: Hmm... do you plan on hiding forever? The Terminator is shown at the top of a rooftop, revving up his minigun. Terminator: No! “Surprise Motherfucker!” yelled Discord while wearing a black polo shirt. (*Cues: Terminator 3: Rise of the Machines - Terminator Tangle again*) He then proceeds to fire and lands several solid hits on the surprised RoboCop, who is knocked back. RoboCop manages to evade the remainder of the fire and analyzes the minigun, finding a weakness in its 6 barrel pivot. He fires six shots, each of which hit their marks, jamming the minigun, which Terminator discards. RoboCop charges at him, but Terminator aims his grenade launcher, calculating the arc angle. Terminator: Time to bring you down to earth! He manages to hit the flight pack with the grenade launcher, causing it to malfunction. With his flight pack out of control, RoboCop jumps off onto the rooftop as it flies off towards the ground without him. RoboCop attaches the weapon arm, and Terminator throws aside his grenade launcher for his shotgun and jumps down towards him. RoboCop: Your move. Terminator lands a hit, but RoboCop retaliates with his flamethrower, continuously burning him. (*Cues: Robocop 1987 - Rock Shop*) RoboCop: Property damage. Resisting arrest. Assaulting an officer. Murderer, your hot streak ends here. RoboCop stops firing the flamethrower and the Terminator, a part of his face burned, is agitated. Terminator: Fuck you, Dick-wad! RoboCop: You have the right to remain silent... RoboCop then kicks the Terminator off of the building, and aims at his falling opponent with his weapon arm. RoboCop: I suggest you exercise it. Note to self remember to use that line when capturing a criminal,” muttered Shining armor getting a nod from Flash Sentry. He fire his smart bomb missile, which hits the Terminator, forcing him into an oil tank, which creates a massive explosion. RoboCop jumps down from the building, "do a flip!" cheered Discord. (*Cues: Death by Fire/Terminator Gets Up - The Terminator 1984*) but the Terminator makes it out, with his human skin and clothes destroyed, but the machine underneath unscathed and still holding his shotgun in his left hand. He then opens a hidden compartment in his chest, and reaches inside it with his right hand, pulling out a plasma rifle. He then fires at RoboCop, two of the shots which hit, stunning his weapon arm and right leg. RoboCop is then forced to limp away into cover behind a car in order to evade the plasma rifle blasts. Once he gets behind the car, he lifts it up with one hand and throws it towards the Terminator, trapping his right arm. The Terminator is forced to tear itself away from its right arm and then marches towards RoboCop with his shotgun. “He’s willing to give up a arm to continue,” muttered a terrified Flash Sentry. (*Cues: Terminator 2 main theme*) Terminator fires shot after shot, damaging part of RoboCop's visor display and draining his battery level from 6% to 5%. RoboCop scans for a weakness, finding one in the Terminator's waist hinge. Eventually, RoboCop is forced into a corner as Terminator points his shotgun at his opponent's head. But just as the Terminator pulls the trigger... the weapon's out of ammo. “Huh?” asked a dumbfounded team Terminator. RoboCop: Nine shots. You're out. (*Cues: Unknown Theme*) Discord grinned and said. “you done goofed,” Without another hand for the Terminator to reload his shotgun, RoboCop then attaches a level 10 ordinance grenade to the Terminator, grounds himself with his rambolts, and then takes out his handcannon. RoboCop: Checkmate. He then shoots the grenade with his pistol, causing a huge explosion. RoboCop is damaged, but is alright, and thinks the fight is over. “I doubt it.” said Sunburst. (*Cues: Death by Fire/Terminator Gets Up - The Terminator 1984*) RoboCop is surprised to see that Terminator is still functional, crawling with one arm and with its head turned the other way. He proceeds to lift up the Terminator by his neck. RoboCop: What are you doing? This fight is over. The Terminator then turns his head in the right direction towards RoboCop. “Whoa!” yelled out a startled Spike. “ that creepy.” Terminator: Not... yet. RoboCop, at 1% charge, realizes that the fuel cells have been ruptured. RoboCop: Hydrogen fuel cells... ruptured! “SHIT!” yelled out everyone. If one fuel cell had such destructive they shuddered at the thought of TWO exploding at the same time. The Terminator, intent on taking his opponent with him, tries reaching out to grab RoboCop. Terminator: You... are... terminated. “I gotta give the wind up toy credit, it never gives up,” complemented Discord. (*Cues: The Terminator - Terminator 3: Rise of the Machines*) With quick thinking, RoboCop straps Terminator to the flight-pack, which crash-landed on a car nearby, and sends him into the air. Terminator: I'll... be... BACK! Shortly after he says this, the hydrogen fuel cells explode, creating a huge explosion as the screen goes white. The head surprisingly comes down with the red eyes still glowing. RoboCop proceeds to twirl his pistol and places it back into his leg. K.O.! RoboCop then walks forward and stomps on the Terminator's head, shattering it, then continues walking. Results (*Cues: Unknown Theme*) Boomstick: I don't think he'll be back from that one. “I’ll say,” muttered out a bummed out Thorax. Wiz: Terminator may have held the speed advantage, but RoboCop trumped everything else. His arsenal certainly had more destructive force behind it. Boomstick: You'd think the Terminator's space rifle would be enough, but RoboCop has tanked plasma shots before. Wiz: In fact, the difference in survivability is very clear cut. RoboCop fell from the top of a skyscraper on to a gas tank which then exploded... and he was fine. “While no superman levels of durability it’s still really impressive,” said Shining Armor. Boomstick: The Terminator was blown up by a homemade pipe bomb. “In the words of Rainbow Dash, lame~,” mocked Spike. Wiz: RoboCop pushed a building-busting bomb into a warehouse (that's solid brick by the way), which detonated in his face... and he was fine. “The guys like a walking fortress,” said Flash in awe. Boomstick: The Terminator was obliterated by the same kind of explosion. Wiz: RoboCop stopped and REVERSED a 3000 psi hydraulic press with his bare hands... Boomstick: Y-you guys see where this is going now, right? “Yay we get it Boomstick,” snarked Sunburst with an eye roll. Wiz: And being part-human means that Murphy can think more creatively, adding a level of unpredictability the Terminator could not immediately understand. Boomstick: The Terminator almost had a victory, until it blew up in his face. “Boo! Get of the stage!” yelled Discord. Wiz: The winner is RoboCop. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Boomstick: Next time on Death Battle. The group sees a figure that they could barely see but they could see that he has a mustache and a cap with an L on it. Then they saw another figure that looked like a fox… with two tails. “Well this will be interesting,” said a confused Spike. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ “Well that was all well and good but usually we would get something from a magic box after an episode but that’s back in the castle,” said Spike with a disappointed tone. But before anyone could say anything a bright light filled the room blinding everyone. “What in Harmony’s name was that?” asked Sunburst while rubbing his eye’s. Once everyone one’s vision came back to them the first thing they noticed was they were all at sugar cube center sitting around a table and the second thing they noticed was that each one of them had a wrapped gift sat in front of them on the table. “Well this is new,” muttered Spike as he notice a note placed on top of his gift. Picking it up Spike began to read, “Hope you enjoyed your guys night out. Here’s some presents and have a Merry Christmas.” “What’s this Christmas thing?” Shining and Flash asked while Sunburst and Thorax looked confused. “A human world holiday like our Hearth’s Warming Eve,” Spike said as he picked his gift and started to unwrap it. Once all the paper was taken off, Spike opened the box to find a load of comics inside. “Sweet, what did you guys get?” Big Mac held up a familiar black leather jacket while wearing black sunglasses. Shining Armor had a gun similar to Robocop and started to inspect it. Sunburst was looking through a book that had different charts and graphs inside it. If any of them looked closely, they would see that the book showed different designs and some pictures of certain robots and machines. Flash was trying on a helmet that looked like a pony version of Robocop’s helmet. Once on, Flash said, “I’m never taking this off.” Thorax held up a terminator action figure and said, “cool.” “Okay. I guess we should go back home,” Spike said, jumping off his chair. “I guess we should. It’s gonna be a long ride back,” Shining said as Flash, Sunburst and Thorax walked towards the door. Once outside, the prince of the crystal kingdom turned back to the Ponyville residents and said, “We should do this again sometime.” “Yeah but on our own terms. Anyways I need to get back so bye everyone,” Spike said, running towards the castle while muttering. “I got to take care of a few things.” Everyone else said their goodbyes as Big Mac walked towards his farm in silence. He just about home when he heard a scream coming from the Everfree Forest. Without even thinking, Big Mac ran into the forest to find out where the screaming came from. A moment later and Big Mac found Cheerilee in a clearing as a Timberwolf was looming over her. The timberwolf was getting closer to Cheerilee as she just laid there, waiting for somepony to save her. The wooden animal opened its maw, ready to bite her, when it looked up and was hit with a cart. Looking at the rekt cart, she saw Big Mac slowly dismount from it and make his way towards her. Once he was in front of her, he held out his hoof to the school teacher. Cheerilee was confused as she asked, “Does this mean come with you if I want to live?” “Eeyup,” Big Mac simply said. While Cheerilee got back to her hoofs, the sound of wood snapping drew their attention back to the cart. The timberwolf was slowly reconstructing itself as it clawed it’s out of the wreckage. “Nope,” said big Mac as he picked up one of the wheels from the cart and chucked with all of his strength at the twisted monster and when it hit both it and the Timberwolf were sent flying into the distance. Cheerilee walked up to Big Mac and said, “My hero,” while hugging him. Big Mac just smirked while adjusting his glasses at the job well done. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Chapter end! Next ti-*record scratch* “wait! Wait! Wait! Hold on before we end the chapter here’s a trailer for you guys!” Trailer start in 3… 2… 1! (a DEADMAN PRODUCTION!) YOU LOVED THE MAIN SIX WATCHES DEATH BATTLE. Random commentor: What. The. Fuck. Is. This. Shit? NOW WE BRING YOU THE NEXT BIG THING! Trepp: ….WHAT DO YOU MEAN WE DON’T HAVE ANYTHING PLANNED OUT!?, YOU STUPID MOTHER- A THRILLING TALE OF BEST FRIENDS! Rainbow Dash: Heh, we finally found a perfect match for you. Miracles do happen. Sunset: FUCK YOU RAINBOW DASH! WHERE OUR HEROES WILL LEARN IMPORTANT LIFE LESSONS. ????:Invest in real estate. There's no such thing as a preferment record. Always eat breakfast. All the girls on the internet are actually dudes. And you should never, ever buy the extended warranty on anything...EVER. Oh, also, chicks like it when you tell them their pretty, but they also like it when you're kind of a dick to em. So, mix it up a little! Pinkie Pie: I’m learning! STARRING: SUNSET SHIMMER. Sunset: GOD FUCKING DAMNIT. *fires a rifle wildly onto some assholes* AND THESE ASSHOLES! Human 6: HEY ENJOY AS THEY WATCH A SHOW THAT ASK THE REAL QUESTIONS! Pan up from the ground and close in on two soldiers on top of a base, one clad in maroon armor, the other in orange. Maroon armor: Hey. Orange: Yeah? Maroon Armor: You ever wonder why we’re here? SUNSET AND FRIENDS WATCHES RED VS BLUE! COMING SOON… ISH. (trailer end) ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Chapter end! Next time luigi vs tails. Luigi VS Tails.The next day Twilight was waiting for her friends in front of her castle for the next episode of death battle, Hopefully Spike would be able to get them. As the minutes passed Twilight noticed a blue speck in the sky starting to slowly get closer, smiling Twilight open the front door letting her friends rainbow dash in. As Rainbow Dash flew in, Twilight noticed she was wearing the large cap that covered up most of her mane. “What's with the cap?” “I had an… annoying run-in with Discord today,” Rainbow Dash said. “Anyways, ready for today’s episode?” asked Twilight. “Aww yeah, it’s gonna be so awesome. I can’t wait for the others to get here,” Rainbow said, punching the air in front of her as a knocking sound was heard. Rainbow flew to the front door while saying, “Hey girls, what’s….up?” What Rainbow saw wasn’t her friends standing there excitingly chatting away. What was there was a small orange pegasus filly with a purple mane as she looked up at the older mare. “Squirt? What're you doing here?” Rainbow asked, landing on the ground. She began to think if she promised Scootaloo anything recently but came up with nothing. “Hey, Rainbow Dash. Can we hang out?” Scootaloo asked, flapping her little wings in excitement. “Well, i was kinda gonna do something with Twilight and the others,” Rainbow began to say as Scootaloo looked at the ground. “Oh,” the orange filly said, feeling a bit depressed. Seeing her little friend and little sister figure in such a sad state had Rainbow Dash quickly think of a way to fix this. “ Though i’m sure Twilight wouldn't mind if you joined us.” The little filly looked up at her idol and asked, “Really?” “I'm sure it'll be fine,” Rainbow said while waving a hoof dismissively. “Now c’mon inside squirt. It's gonna start as soon as everypony gets here.” Scootaloo didn't know what was gonna start but followed Rainbow into the viewing room where Twilight was. Once inside, the filly marveled at the sheer size of the TV as Rainbow landed by Twilight. “Yo Twi, is it ok if Scoots joins us for this Episode?” the blue mare asked her purple friend. Said mare thought about it for a moment before she just shrugged her shoulders. “I don’t see why not,” Twilight said with a smile much to the young filly’s joy. “Scootaloo i think i should warn you that what we're about to watch might get a bit violent,” Twilight said, hoping the filly would understand the implications of her warning. “Don’t worry Twilight i’m a big girl,” said the little pegasus with pride much to the amusement of the two adult mares. “You sure are squirt,” said Rainbow dash as she ruffled the orange filly’s mane causing her to let out few giggles. It didn’t take them long for the others to arrive and see Scootaloo there, eating a few marshmallows. After Twilight explained why the filly was there, she grabbed the remote and pressed play. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Interlude (*Cues: Invader - Jim Johnston*) Wiz: With the dragon slain and the princess rescued, the hero revels in gold, glory and cake. “And a "thank you for saving me" kisses!” Spike added, giving Rarity a wink. “Down boy.” Rarity giggled while the rest of the group chuckled. Boomstick: But they couldn't have done it without a little help. Wiz: The sidekick. The people's champion would be lost without his player 2. “Sidekicks huh?” Scootaloo mused before smiling at her big sister. “So Dash…” “Maybe when you're older.” “Aw~” Wiz: Such as Luigi, Mario's younger brother... “Wait, younger brother?” Starlight said with interest, unaware that the heroic plumber had any siblings. Boomstick: And Tails the Fox, Sonic's deformed flying stalker. “So one of Sonic’s friends is in this fight huh? That explains why Discord did this to my mane.” Rainbow stated before taking off her cap, revealing that her mane had been styled to look just like Sonic’s quills. She smirked before glancing at her friends who were all trying not to snicker. “Just so you all know, I still have my book.” Wiz: Now we have already proven that standard Mario and Sonic series power-ups perfectly counter each other, so, to not waste time, we're giving these second strings only what unique to them. “Make sense,” said Twilight with a shrug. Boomstick: He's Wiz and I'm Boomstick. Wiz: And it's our job to analyze their weapons, armor and skills to find out who would win a Death Battle. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Luigi (*Cues: Super Mario All-Stars - Game Select Theme*) Wiz: After clobbering Koopas, besting Bowser, and saving the princess, who gets all the credit? Boomstick: Mario, of course. “Wait, what?” Spike asked. Boomstick: Leaving his lanky brother with rejected sloppy seconds. “That hardly seems fair.” Fluttershy mumbled, feeling sorry for the younger sibling. “I’ll say,” muttered Applejack. (*Cues: New Super Luigi U - Main Theme*) Wiz: No doubt, Luigi has it rough. Despite being born as one of the seven star children destined for greatness, it's not easy being second fiddle to the most popular character in video game history, yet he doesn't seem to mind. Like a good sidekick, Luigi exists only to help Mario, never asking for his own slice of the cake. Boomstick: So he's pretty much a slave. "I wouldn't say slave, he's more like… a really effective partner." Twilight elaborated, giving Spike an affectionate pat on the head. “I’m sure he gets his reward in some way,” said Rarity. Wiz: In a way, but this devotion makes him the perfect teammate, helping to save the Mushroom Kingdom time and time again. Boomstick: What did Mario do to him to make him so obedient? He's gotta have some serious dirt from their childhood. Background Age: 26 Height: 5'5" Weight: 200 lbs. Mario's Younger Brother Citizen of Mushroom Kingdom Trained by the Jellyfish Sisters & the Thunder God Wiz: Luigi may take subordination to an extreme, but he's no pushover. In fact, he's not only taller than Mario, but also faster and more athletic. “That does make sense, considering he's thinner and taller than his brother.” said Rainbow Dash. Wiz: He can jump over 6 feet higher, plus after studying Yoshi's superb jumping ability, Luigi developed his own variant of the dinosaur's floating technique, the Scuttle Jump. “Impressive.” Applejack mused while Fluttershy giggled at how silly the Scuttle Jump looked “Heheh! Reminds me of how i float when i flap my wings,” laughed Scootaloo while flapping her small wings to do just that. Skills & Abilities Superhuman Strength & Stamina Scuttle Jump Super Jump Green Missile Luigi Cyclone Super Jump Punch Superior Jumping Ability Boomstick: His abilities don't end with the mid-air hustle, Luigi has plenty of powerful attacks, each of which, if pulled off perfectly, increase their damage for quick KO's. The spinning Luigi Cyclone, the rocketing Green Missile, The screen changed to showcase several of his moves, Rainbow and Scootaloo applauded the Luigi Cyclone, hoping to learn a move like that. “Now that's what I call using your head!” Pinkie joked upon seeing the Green Missile, earning the collective groan from the rest of the audience. “Leave the bad puns to Boomstick dear.” Rarity sighed. Boomstick: And the Super Jump Punch, which can send his foe up into the air so high, they never come back down. Luigi sneaks up on Jigglypuff from behind and uses the Super Jump Punch, knocking Jigglypuff into the background. Jigglypuff: JIGGLYPUFF!!!!! Spike, Scootaloo, Pinkie, and Rainbow burst out laughing at the sight. “Poor Jigglypuff…” mumbled Fluttershy feeling bad for the pink ball pokemon. (*Cues: Athletic Theme - New Super Mario Bros. Wii*) Wiz: In addition, He has numerous power-ups at his disposal, including his trusty hammer and the Vanish Power Flower, which makes him invisible and intangible. Wiz: Luigi could be next to you… Everyone shivered as the atmosphere grew cold. Wiz: Watching you… While everyone else were looking around Rainbow Dash quietly sneaked behind the nearest pony who unfortunately was Rarity. Wiz: Right now... “WEEGEE!!” Rainbow shouted from behind Rarity. “EEEEEK!!!” The fashionista screamed in terror Boomstick: Aahhh, stop that! He was trained by the Thunder God himself in the powerful Thunder Hand technique. With this he can shoot lightning at his foes or at deadly soccer balls. “Sweet!” cheered Rainbow Dash and Scootaloo. Wiz: And after spending so much time in Mario's shadow, Luigi has somehow gained the ability to manipulate some sort of negative energy. Luigi dances, creating the Negative Zone. “... trippy,” muttered Starlight as she stared at the negative zone. “...and disturbing...” Scootaloo added, getting some bad vibes from seeing the display. (*Cues: Battlerock Galaxy - Super Mario Galaxy*) Boomstick: Remember when Mario Bros. was about running around and jumping on turtles? Anyway, you were saying something about physics breaking time energy or whatever? Wiz: Luigi's Negative Zone can devastate a nearby opponent. Its effects are random, but unavoidable, ranging from sudden dizziness to uncontrollable tripping over absolutely nothing. “Wow i don’t think even my Pinkie sense would predict that!” gasped out Pinkie Pie. Boomstick: But when Luigi wants real firepower, he busts out the Poltergust 5000, a handy vacuum cleaner which can somehow kill ghosts. It can KILL that which is already DEAD. “Wait, WHAT?!” Twilight gasped. “How is that even possible?!” “It’s a videogame don’t question it,” shrugged Spike before flinching away from Twilight as her mane was starting to burst into flames. “AS PRINCESS I WILL QUESTION AS MUCH AS I PLEASE!” she yelled in the royal canterlot voice. Wiz: He ain't afraid of no ghosts. Power-Ups Hammer Thunderhand Vanish Power Flower Poltergust 3000 (Elemental Medals: Fire, Water, Ice) Negative Zone A ghost appears behind Luigi, frightening him. (*Cues: Professor E. Gadd - Luigi's Mansion: Dark Moon*) Wiz: Scratch that, he's afraid of all ghosts, bugs, water, flowers, the sun. “This guy is making me look like the bravest pony in the world” Fluttershy mumbled. Wiz: Luigi is a coward and doesn't even try to hide it. Granted, his fears are usually justified,... usually. Boomstick: He's also pretty clumsy, and you'd think would make a terrible combination. But like the Chinese Drunken Master style, Luigi harnesses awkwardness to make himself even more vicious. He's more powerful than he seems, murdering Goombas and Koopas by the hundreds every day. Luigi uses a cannon on the Koopas in "Koopa's Kartoon Show". Weaknesses Cowardly Clumsy Sleeps through important events Inferiority complex Fails at traction (*Cues: Mr. L/Green Thunder - Super Paper Mario*) Boomstick: Ha Ha. Before we go any further, I'd like to point out that the unmaking cannon belongs to a bunch of children. "IS IT BEDTIME NOW MOM?!" Goush! No more parents! Scootaloo smirked deviously as she glanced at the gift box behind them, she slowly took a few steps backwards… “Scoots, no.” Rainbow said without turning around. The orange Pegasus sighed and sat back down next to her. Wiz: Even without it, Luigi has defeated Dimentio, discovered the Grand Final Galaxy, raised a ravenous man-eating dinosaur, and even rescued Mario from certain doom on three separate occasions. Feats & Strengths Expert in multiple sports Defeated Dimentio Saved Wario from Chief Chilly Defeated King Boo Assisted Mario in many adventures Regularly smashes solid bricks Won Mario Party by doing absolutely nothing “It’s not uncommon for the sidekick to save the hero.” Spike smiled. “I’ve even read a few comics where Humdrum saved the Power Ponies.” Scootaloo smiled at this. “Oh, you read those too?” Wiz: The Green Thunder can pretty much do it all. Boomstick: Luigi is one mean, green, fighting machine. Luigi: *Puts on Poltergust* Yeah. *Speaking into the nozzle* I do it. Ho-ho! Luigi dances, then accidentally bumps into a car, which then causes a shelf to fall down. Luigi: Oh... This caused the girls to laugh and Spike chuckled at the clumsy green plumber. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ The group was impressed with Luigi's skill and willingness to face his fear to save the day. “I’m rooting for him,” declared Spike getting some agreements from Applejack, Fluttershy, and even Rarity. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Tails (*Cues: Seaside Hill: Act 2 - Sonic Generations*) Tails: All systems go... full speed ahead! “AWWWWW~!” cried Twilight and her five friends while Spike and Scootaloo covered their ears in pain. Wiz: Born the very same day Dr. Eggman began his robot powered takeover of the world, Miles Prower- Boomstick: Haha! I get it! Miles-Per-Hour! Creativity like that is why Sega is still making consoles… “Oh shut up.” Scootaloo scoffed bitterly. Background Full Name: Miles "Tails" Prower Age: 11 Height: 2'7" Weight: 44lbs. IQ: 300 The youngest Freedom Fighter The Chosen One of the Ancient Walkers Wiz: Ahem, Miles was awkwardly born with two tails. Mere minutes after being welcomed into the world, Eggman's deadly forces made Miles Prower an orphan. “... damn.” muttered Applejack. “Oh my… that poor little fox...” whimpered Fluttershy, feeling sympathy for the fox losing his parents. Boomstick: Whoa, that's... that's pretty fucked up. “I’ll say…” said Rainbow Dash while taking a glance towards Applejack and Scootaloo. “What is it with every hero in fiction always losing their parents?” Spike asked angrily. “Is there just some unspoken law that no hero can have a happy family?!” Wiz: Eight years later, and after some much needed counseling, Miles stumbled upon a broken-down biplane and happily repaired the whole vehicle on his own. “At the age of 8?” asked an impressed Twilight. Boomstick: Well, of course. Just like all walking, talking, adolescent, two-tailed foxes can. Anyway, as it turns out, that plane happened to belong to Miles' personal idol, Sonic the Hedgehog. Sonic: What're you doing? (*Cues: Emerald Hill Zone - Sonic The Hedgehog 2*) Boomstick: Why Sonic needed a plane in the first place is beyond me, but whatever. “Well Eggman’s got those flying battleships…. and he can’t exactly swim...” Rainbow stated. Wiz: It was Sonic who first suggested that Miles' birth defects could be used to fly by spinning them like helicopter blades. Which is obviously impossible because it could never create lift and-- *Shocked to see that Miles is flying* WHAT?! “That’s so cool!” cheered Scootaloo her wings buzzing in excitement. “B-b-but how?!” Twilight shoulted in confusion. ”His anatomy shouldn’t allow that! And how could he-” “Twilight, this is a world where hedgehogs run at super-speed and fight an evil egg-scientist, are you REALLY trying to apply logic here?” Rainbow asked. “But-” Spike interrupted her. “Don’t try to wrap your brain around it Twi, it’ll be the “Pinkie-Sense” all over again.” (*Cues: Believe In Myself (Instrumental) - Sonic Adventure 2*) Boomstick: And so, Sonic gave his rotary ass the oh so obvious nickname he deserved, "TAILS". “That's a catchy nickname.” Starlight smiled. “I think it's cute.” Fluttershy giggled. “Ya… cute,” mumbled Scootaloo. Wiz: Well that's stupid. That's like if you were nicknamed "Boomstick" because you just like shotguns. Boomstick: Don't be fucking ridiculous, Wizard. Everyone chuckled at this. Boomstick: Anyway, besides flight, Tails' copter butt blades are strong enough to bust metal, and he can use them like a turbine of an engine to keep up with Sonic's super fast speeds. He can almost reach the speed of sound. Rainbow gave a whistle, impressed with the young foxe’s skill. “The kid is impressive!” said the blue mare before reaching over and ruffling Scootaloo’s main. “ just like you squirt.” Scootaloo giggled at the affection and turn her gaze back onto Tail with eyes filled with admiration. Twin Tails Flight Increases running speed Strong enough to break metal Combat techniques (Tail Swipe Attack, Rapid Tails Attack, & Thunder Shoot Punt) Wiz: Tails pledged himself to Sonic's freedom fighting cause against Dr. Eggman, and the two became friends, almost like brothers. “Aww, that’s sweet.” Fluttershy smiled as Rainbow gave her own “little sis” a playful noogie. Wiz: They also share a sort of teacher-student relationship, though it wasn't always clear who was the student. Boomstick: It was Tails who invented the famous Spin Dash. Not the speedy hedgehog. (*Cues: Mad Gear Zone Act 2 - Sonic The Hedgehog 4 Episode 1*) Wiz: Tails is a genius and a master mechanic. Boomstick: He's so much smarter than Sonic, that he actually learned how to swim. “How hard it is for Sonic to learn how the swim?” Scootaloo asked curiously, if his sidekick could do it, why not the hero? “I think it has something to do with aquaphobia...” Rainbow said. Wiz: He has built several planes and combat mechs and has numerous gadgets on hand. Like the Projectile Ring, which can pull or latch onto objects, almost like a grappling hook. Boomstick: But despite being a super geek, he really likes to blow shit up. He carries a huge supply of bombs. Big bombs, napalm bombs, remote bombs, flash-bang grenades, bombs shaped like magic rings, bombs shaped like mice, bombs shaped like your mother. You name it, he's got a bomb like it. “Oooo! You think he has a party bomb?” Pinkie asked in excitement. Twilight gave her pink friend a flat stare before pulling out a rolled up newspaper and gently wacked Pinki’s mane. “Hey!” “Bad Pinkie, no bombs in any parties,” the princess of friendship said with a flat tone. Wiz: He also wields the Magic Hand, a long-range comical punching weapon, and the Energy Ball arm cannon. “Man i hope we get to see a fighter whose main weapon is a arm cannon,” said an excited spike. Boomstick: Which is ripped straight out of Mega Man! He built all this HIMSELF, but never a device to breath underwater. Kinda dropped the ball there, sidekick. “Meh, even a genius has an off day,” shrugged Starlight. Offensive Arsenal Spin Dash Projectile Ring Bombs (Napalm, Chu^2, Dummy Rings, Flash Bangs) Magic Hand Energy Ball arm cannon (*Cues: Sonic The Hedgehog - Drowning Theme*) Tails swims underwater as the timer goes down to zero, causing him to drown. Applejack face-hoofed. “Seriously?! He couldn't have built some scuba gear or something?!” Rarity shuddered. “That’s just disturbing...” “Yeah, drowning is one of the worst ways to die.” Spike agreed. Wiz: Unlike Sonic's speed-blitzing battling style, Tails relies on logic and tactics in a fight. His Shield Bot fortifies his defenses and his Medibot heals wounds over time. ‘Putting thouse on the list of things to make… after i find out who broke my Rainbow-Bot!’ thought an angry Twilight who was still wondering why somepony would break her invention and steal the designs for them. ‘Not to self make sure to burn the blueprints for the pony bots,’ thought Spike. Support Arsenal Medi Bot Shield Bot Jet Anklets (Boosts flight speed) Rhythm Badge (Helps maintain balance) T-Pup remote robot Boomstick: But he's a total wimp. He can't fly forever, and if he doesn't have Sonic around to hold his hand, he's scared of pretty much everything. After a good thunderclap you'll find him shivering his spiny ass off in the bathtub. Sonic: Right, we should hurry. Thunder goes off in the background, scaring Tails, who jumps and grabs onto Sonic. Tails/Fluttershy/Scootaloo: GAAHH!! I'm afraid of lightning!! Everyone couldn't help but chuckle at the adorable sight of Tails clinging to Sonic…. and laughed a little upon seeing Scootaloo latched onto Rainbow’s leg and Fluttershy cowering under her left wing. Weaknesses Fear of thunder (also known as Astraphobia) Fear of ghosts (also known as Phasmophobia) Gets dizzy easily Over-reliability on Sonic Youthful naiveté Lacks hand-to-hand combat (*Cues: Event: All Heroes Gather - Sonic Heroes*) Wiz: Well, he is only 11 years old, and the feats he's accomplished at his age are beyond impressive. Like being able to run 100 mph without his tails, stopping a nuclear missile, and saving the MULTIVERSE by transforming into... Uh... (the group now sees a really buff Tails.) (*music fades*) Scootaloo’s eye twitched. “I…. I don’t even...” “What am I even looking at?!” Pinkie shouted. Boomstick: Don't do steroids kids. “Agreed.” said Rarity not realising she was agreeing with Boomstick. Feats & Strengths Top speed: 1223 km/h / 700 mph Can run 100 mph without his tails Self-taught genius technician Defeated Wendy Witchcart Saved Station Square from a nuke Defeated the Battle Bird Armada Defeated Dr. Ivo "Eggman" Robotnik on the ARK Unified the Chaos Emeralds to complete the Great Harmony The scene changed to Tails fixing his plane while Sonic watched. Sonic: We good to go or what, Tails? Tails: I've built a TV out of paperclips... Starlight blinked. “Wait, what?” Sonic: Yeah... Tails: ...and reprogrammed a supercomputer using dishwashing detergent and a toothpick... Sonic: I know... “I'm no genius but I'm pretty sure that's impossible.” Rainbow stated. Tails: ...So look, fixing a propeller on a bi-plane? That's about as difficult as taking a nap. [spins propeller] As Tails spins the propeller, the plane starts its engine after it was fixed. “I have SEVERAL questions….” Twilight deadpanned. Sonic: 'Kay, I did not need your whole life story. A simple "good to go" would have been cool. Tails: Alright. Good to go! Sonic: Cool! “Heh heh, I like this guy! He's got smarts and snark!” Scootaloo chuckled. “Aww~ somepony’s got a crush!” Pinkie giggled, much to the foal’s embarrassment. “Just like her big sis!” Applejack added. Rainbow simply rolled her eyes and pulled out her book. “Shutting up now.” Applejack said with a strained smile. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ The group was REALLY impressed with Tails’s accomplishments and feats at such a young age. “I’m rooting for Tails!” declared Scootaloo with red cheeks. much the the amusement of the rest of the group ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Wiz: Alright. The combatants are set. Let's end this debate once and for all. Boomstick: It's time for a time for a Death Battle! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Death Battle (*Cues: Sonic The Movie - Land of Darkness*) Tails flies down onto a pipe and starts scouting the area, but Luigi pops out of the pipe, making Tails jump down. The plumber jumps out of the pipe angrily to face Tails. “I guess he still sore for what Sonic did to Mario,” winced Starlight. Luigi: Let's-a go! FIGHT! (*Cues: Chemical Bath - fan remix of Chemical Plant Zone - Sonic 2*) Tails uses his energy cannon, but Luigi powers through with a Green Missile, but his attack misses as Tails jumps away and hits Luigi down to the ground with his tails. Luigi jumps back up as Tails uses the spin dash to charge at his opponent, but Luigi counters with the hammer, hitting Miles up into the air. Luigi follows him upwards with his Scuttle Jump and they go blow-for-blow, with it being Tails Swipes VS Luigi Cyclones. The two eventually knock each other away, Tails into the air and Luigi onto the ground. Luigi walks around as Tails closes in on him and the plumber tries to jump up and hit Tails with his Hammer again, but Tails counters it with his tails again, knocking Luigi back. “GO TAILS!!!” cheered Scootaloo, jumping up and down in excitement. “Whoo! That boy gots some moves!” said Rainbow Dash impressed. Tails lands on the ground and tries out another spin dash, but this time Luigi launches Tails up with his Super Jump Punch. Tails manages to recover though and begins flying around the place from his high altitude. He then goes back down to the ground, picks up Luigi and begins to fly back up, but Luigi uses his vanish flower to confuse Tails, and knocks the fox away with his hammer to break free. “Oh i know i said i’d root for Luigi but i don’t want to see the cute fox get hurt either.” whimpered out Fluttershy. The Hammer and Tails' gadgets go blow-for-blow first with the Magic Hand and Hammer colliding, Tails taking out his arm cannon again but Luigi simply hits him, Tails using the Magic Hand from the ground now but doing nothing to his intangible adversary and finally as Tails charges up his arm cannon once more, Luigi nails him in the face and sends him downwards a bit. “Gasp!” gasped out Scootaloo seeing Tails getting nailed in the face. “Don’t worry he can still pull through,” comforted Twilight while Rainbow Dash patted the young filly’s back. As Tails recovers from the blow and starts flying again Luigi uses the Scuttle Jump again to land safely as the invisibility wears off. But soon after Luigi lands, (*Cues: Super Mario Galaxy 2 - Bowser Jr's Boomsday Machine*) Tails drops multiple bombs surrounding the plumber and leaving him to run around in panic. Luigi then gets the idea to suck up the bombs with his Poltergust 5000, and fires all the bombs at Tails. However, they are launched just barely too low to hit Tails, and it backfires on him as they land before he can run and blow him sky high. “Pfft Hahahahaha!” everyone laughed at the poor plumber’s misfortune. After being launched up, Luigi notices a pipe and dives into it, then shooting out with his Lightning powers fully activated, completely surrounded in lightning. He hits Tails with his Super Jump Punch, followed by a Green Missile and then slams into him multiple times with Luigi Cyclones before hitting him with his Hammer, and transferring all of the electricity into his hands, sending Tails away with an extremely powerful Thunder Hand. “Nooo!!!” cried Scootaloo as Rainbow Dash held her close. In the distance, Tails gets back on his feet and uses his Medi Bot to heal, but Luigi somehow clears all that distance and uses his Poltergust to bring it close to him and the Hammer to destroy it. Luigi then tries to suck Tails in and finish the fight, and almost succeeds until Tails throws his projectile ring at a nearby pipe to keep himself steady, and throws out a Flash Bang which Luigi's Poltergust sucks up and escapes into a pipe. “Too bright!” cried Rarity as she tried to get her eyesight back. (*Cues: Opening Cutscene - Sonic Lost World*) The Flash Bang blows up, and while Luigi is dizzy, Tails comes out of the pipe and rigs a bomb onto the Poltergust and tries stalling him with his Shield Bot, but Luigi quickly destroys the bot with his hammer again. Tails jumps away from his broken machinery as Luigi pulls out and breaks a Smash Ball. Tails begins to walk towards Luigi but the plumber unleashes Negative Zone. “Oh no the acid trip is back!” cried Pinkie pie. (*Cues: The Negative Zone - SSBB*) Tails trips up and is almost hit with Luigi's hammer but he flies up to just barely escape it. He is almost sucked up by the Poltergust and finished, but Luigi is forced to stop when he notices the bomb and tries to throw it away. Unfortunately, while Tails fails to escape the blast due to the Negative Zone slowing down gravity, Luigi does not escape either and is sent hurling through the air until he slides up to the front of a pipe as the Negative Zone gets destroyed. “Sigh… welp Luigi’s a goner,” sighed Spike in defeat. (*Cues: Sonic Lost World - The Deadly Six Theme*) Tails quickly runs up to Luigi (with his tails on fire for a brief moment, presumably due to the explosion) and has him backed up against the pipe. With the two being face-to-face, Luigi readies his Hammer to squash Tails and end the fight, but isn't fast enough as the Magic Hand quickly rockets forwards, impaling Luigi through the abdomen and damaging the Warp Pipe. “Damn,” all the older mares said at seeing that finisher. K.O.! Tails goes off to heal himself with another Medi Bot as Luigi's dead corpse is left on the pipe with blood still coming out from where the Magic Hand impaled him. “... well i’m mentally scarred for life,” said Scootaloo. Results (*Cues: Sonic the Movie - Metal Sonic Fight*) Boomstick: Well, there goes the Year of Luigi. Wiz: While Luigi technically has more combat experience, and has survived being Nintendo's whipping boy, Tails' skills and arsenal was more than the green capped plumber can handle. Boomstick: His training with Sonic makes him faster and his superior mobility gave him complete control over the battlefield. Wiz: Also, he has an outrageous I.Q. of 300. “300?!” Twilight and Starlight exclaimed in shock. Wiz: Which is about as much as Albert Einstein and Stephen Hawking combined. Boomstick: Hell, Tails is stronger too. He can move 10 tons, while Luigi struggles to lift a large radish. Wiz: And Tails' gadgets more than make up for any of his weaknesses. Boomstick: Looks like Luigi was outfoxed. Scootaloo scoffed. “That pun was terrible.” Wiz: The winner is Miles "Tails" Prower. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Boomstick: Next time on Death Battle. Three red and white orbs roll on screen… then the one in the middle opens up in a bright flash turns the screen white. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ “That was so awesome,” Scootaloo yelled while everyone walk towards the box. Seeing the box glow, confused Scootaloo as she asked, “Did that box just glow?” “It sure did, squirt. After we watch an episode, we get some stuff from the box,” Rainbow said waving the smaller filly over. Scootaloo ran to the box with an excited look on her face as Pinkie opened the lids and looked inside. Pinkie pulled out a few cardboard cylinders as Twilight levitated them to herself. Opening them showed Twilight that the cylinders were holding a few blueprints inside. “Anything good?” Starlight and Spike asked at the same time. “Well let’s see~! We have some comics,” que everyone getting a few sonic comics. “Also some cute fox outfits for Rarity and Fluttershy,” the two mares happily took their gifts. “A Sonic plushie for Rainbow~.” giggled out Pinkie Pie as she handed out the gift to a blushing Rainbow Dash. “A Poltergust 5000 replica for Applejack!” cheered Pinkie Pie as she handed the farm mare the super vacuum. “This could help gather apples,” said a happy Applejack. “A new fake mustache for me and a Purple Mario hat with a green S for Spike,” Said Pinkie Pie as she and Spike traid on their new gifts. “Is there anything for me?” asked Scootaloo, hoping she also got a gift just for like the others. “Let’s see!” cheered the Pink pony as she stuck her head into the box for a few seconds before pulling her head out with a nervous look. “Umm sorry Scootaloo but it seems there's nothing left…” This shocked the group silent, not willing to believe the Box wouldn't give the little filly a gift. “There has to be some kind of mistake…” muttered Twilight trying to come up with a reason for this phenomenon. “Oh there is no mistake the box didn’t give anything to her for a reason,” stated a new voice. Shocked the group turned around to find Deadman floating near the back of the room as if he was there the whole time and a few members of the group felt that might of been the case. “Deadman…” growled out Starlight. “What are you doing here,” asked Twilight but before she could get an answer Rainbow Dash flew up to the chaos god and glared into his eye’s. “HEY what's the big idea not getting scoots anything!?” yelled Rainbow Dash, wanting a good reason why she shouldn't kick the little fire ball’s flank. “Rainbow Dash have you lost your mind!?” hiss out Rarity as she and the rest of the group pulled the Blue mare away from the chaos god. “This fella isn’t like Discord and we don’t have the elements or control of our rainbow powers!” Applejack said to Rainbow Dash. “Please, you act like i’m going to rain fire from the sky or something,” if he could change his facial expression from its usual expression, he would more then likely be giving them a flat look right now. The group could only give him a few nervous glance while trying to hold back Rainbow Dash. The only one who wasn’t doing either of those things was the little orange Pegasus that this whole situation was revolving around. Only hesitating for a second, Scootaloo walked towards the chaos god and asked, “Um, Mr. Deadman? Why didn’t I get anything?” “Well I got something in mind for you,” Deadman said, lowering himself down to her level. Suddenly two comically white gloved hands appeared in front of the little filly. Before any of the older mare could do anything, one of Deadman’s hands moved towards Scootaloo’s face and ….booped her. Once Scootaloo felt the gloved hand touch her snout, a light shone above her as a melodious voice sang in her ears. It sounded nice to the filly’s ears until everything went dark as a loud bang was heard. The force from the bang itself caused everyone in the room to topple over as Deadman’s laugh echoed through the room. Getting back to her feet, Scootaloo asked, “What was that for?” “Hahaha! Why don’t you check for yourself?” said the chaos god as he gestured for her to look behind her. Confused at what the fireball was saying, Scootaloo looked behind her and gasped at what he was referring to. Instead of her stubby little wings, there were full grown wings for a pegasus of her age with red tips as they flexed. “Are these… my wings?” asked scootaloo with small quiver in her voice. “Yep! just for you kiddo.” answered Deadman with a gentle voice right before he vanished from sight before the rest of the group got their bearings straight. “Why does he have to do something like that?” Spike asked as Rainbow flew in the air, ready to attack the chaos god. “Alright, what did you do to ….Scootaloo?” Rainbow said, taking a good look at the filly’s wings. “What? Did that brute hurt Scootaloo? If I ever see him again I’ll…. Oh my,” Rarity said, stopping her rant once she saw Scootaloo’s wings. The others were in awe once they got their bearings in order as Scootaloo began to move her wings in wonder. “Did Deadman do this?” Starlight asked, not believing that her godly tormenter would do something like this. “Maybe he’s not so bad after all,” Fluttershy said, hugging Doomguy plushie who had it’s hands raised. The others gave it some thought as Scootaloo bent down and jumped into the air. The older mare watched with baited breaths as Scootaloo began to rise higher and higher in the air and flew around the room. “I can fly,” the filly said as a few tear ran down her face. Rainbow flew up beside her and said, “So how’s it feel?” “Awesome,” Scootaloo said, hugging her idol in mid air. “I can’t wait to show Sweetie and Applebloom. They won’t believe it.” “They sure won’t,” Rainbow said as they separated. “Now why don’t you go find them and we’ll stay here for another episode.” “Wait, can Sweetie and Applebloom watch this?” Scootaloo asked, looking at everyone for an answer. “Well, I guess we can wait for a little while,” Twilight said, smiling at the excitable filly. “But you better hurry,” Rainbow dash said, ruffling Scootaloo’s mane. “Please, with these wings, I’ll be back before you know it,” Scootaloo said as she flew out the window to find her friends. Rainbow looked out the window as a few tears ran down her face as she quietly said, “They grow up so fast.” ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ CHAPTER END! NEXT TIME POKEMON BATTLE ROYALE!!!. Pokemon Battle royale.Rainbow Dash took her eyes off the window that her little sister figure flew from and looked at the stopwatch she carries with her. She kept on doing this every few seconds as her friends watched her, unsure of why she was doing this. Twilight, being the most curious of her group, walked up towards her speedy friend and cleared her throat. “What’re you doing, Rainbow?” Twilight asked, getting a bit to curious for her own good. “I’m timing Scoots, Twilight. I want to see how long it takes her to get back here,” Rainbow said like it was the most obvious thing. “Darling, I know you’re happy for Scootaloo as am I. But you have to remember that she just got them and she won’t be like you this soon,” Rarity said, not wanting to hurt her friend’s feelings. “What? I know that. I just want to see how she does for her first time,” Rainbow said nonchalantly. “Oh, so you’re just timing her?” Fluttershy asked, propping Doomguy plushie on the couch. “Yup. I wanna know how she can handle,” Rainbow said loudly.Fluttershy moved back suddenly as something fell out of her mane while saying, “Chu.” “Oh, Pichu. Did you fall asleep in my mane again?” Fluttershy asked gently, picking up her pokemon and hugging it gently. Pichu hugged it’s owner while nodding. Before anyone else could say anything, the door was slammed open as a familiar voice asked, “Did you start it yet?” The ponies and one dragon turned to the door to see Scootaloo with her friends Sweetie Belle and Applebloom. The trio ran into the viewing room and took a seat as fast as they could. Scootaloo looked left and right as she asked, “You didn’t start it, right? Right?” “Don’t fret. We wouldn’t have started without y’all,” Applejack said, making room for her little sister. Rarity did the same for Sweetie Belle as she used her magic to ring the snack table a little closer. “AJ’s right, squirt. Oh, it took you nine minutes and eighteen seconds to get them,” Rainbow said matter-of-factly as a pillow hit her. “Yeah, well I had to calm Bloom and Sweetie down when they saw me,” Scootaloo said, rubbing the back of her head as her friends blushed embarrassingly. “It was shocking ta see,” Applebloom muttered. “It was surprising,” Sweetie simply said, hiding behind her sister. “I bet it was,” Starlight said, giggling into her hoof. She looked at the young pegasus to see that there was a hastily wrapping thing in her hooves. Pointing at the package, Starlight asked, “What do you got there, Scootaloo?” “Oh, it’s nothing,” Scootaloo said, hiding the package behind her back. “Can we start the episode now?” “Sure we can,” Pinkie said as she pressed play with her hoof. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Interlude (*Cues: Invader - Jim Johnston*) Wiz: For nearly two decades, people across the globe have struggled endlessly to make one crucial, exhausting, impossible choice. Boomstick: Bulbasaur, Squirtle, or Charmander? “Look Pichu, more pokemon,” said Fluttershy as the little mouse Pokemon looked at the screen with interest. Wiz: It's finally time to learn if the one you chose was really the strongest. Boomstick: And what better way than with their evolved forms? Venusaur, the pimply plant monster. “Interesting creature…” Applebloom mused. Boomstick: Blastoise, the bazooka turtle. “A turtle with giant cannons on its back?!” Rainbow and Scootaloo exclaimed with stars in their eyes. “SO. AWESOME!!” Boomstick: And Charizard, the... Dragon. “I kinda wish Ember was here to see this one…” Spike said. Wiz: For a fair assessment, we're examining maxed out wild Pokémon. For those of you nerdy enough to care, this means no special EV training, no Mega Evolutions… “What's Mega Evolution?” Twilight asked. “Sounds like something someone could get sued for…” said Pinkie Pie while giving the readers a knowing glance. Wiz: ...and no tutor, bred or otherwise unnaturally learned attacks. This way, we'll avoid any and all player influence. Boomstick: He's Wiz and I'm Boomstick. Wiz: And it's our job to analyze their weapons, armor and skills to find out who would win a Death Battle. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Venusaur (*Cues: Setting Off - Pokémon Anime*) Wiz: The first starter Pokémon evolves from Bulbasaur, to Ivysaur and finally, to Venusaur, the Seed Pokémon. Boomstick: Becoming uglier and uglier with every form. Seriously, what the hell is that thing?! “Looks like some sort of frog-plant thing…” Said Applejack. Background Species: Seed Pokémon Type: Grass & Poison Height: 2 m/6'07" Weight: 100 kg/220.5 lbs Natural habitat: Plains, grasslands Personality: Patient, generous, guardian mentality Wiz: Of the three starters, Venusaur is the most well rounded and easiest to raise. In combat, it relies on it's above average Special Attack and Special Defense, or non-physical combat. Statistics HP: 270 - Average Attack: 167 - Below Average Defense: 168 - Average Sp. Attack: 205 - Above Average Sp. Defense: 205 - Above Average Speed: 165 - Average Abilities Overgrow: Increases grass-type powers Chlorophyll: Boosts speed in sunny weather. (*Cues: Rival Theme - Pokémon X/Y*) Boomstick: Old froggy-plant has a variety of moves. Vine Whip's for slappin' bitches and Razor Leaf can cut through whole trees. “I guess the vegetables were tired of us chopping them up and want to return the favor." Pinkie joked, earning a chuckle from everyone. Boomstick: Then there's the less action-packed skills like Sleep Powder, which is used to put foes to sleep, and take women home from bars. “Oh my…” Fluttershy shuddered. “What does he mean si-?” asked Sweetie Belle before being hushed by her sister. “When you're older,” said Rarity trying everything not to curse at boomstick. Wiz: Venusaur's adaptability is it's greatest asset. It can absorb health with Leech Seed like some kind of jungle vampire, or simply heal on it's own by using Synthesis. It also knows Sweet Scent, which aids the poor accuracy of the Sleep and Poison Powders. Boomstick: But why bother with Poisons and Powders when you've got a super laser! Venusaur can absorb so much sun energy, that he can fire the Solar Beam. Venusaur: VENUSAUUR! *Fires Solar Beam, knocking out Ash's Heracross. “WOW!!” Rainbow shouted upon seeing such a display of raw power. Move Set Tackle Growl Vine Whip (Multipurpose whips, inflict low damage) Razor Leaf (Can slice through tree trunks) Seed Bomb Petal Blizzard (Strikes multiple targets) Poison Powder (75% of poisoning target) Sleep Powder (75% of putting target to sleep) Leech Seed (Slowly absorbs target's health over time) Synthesis (Uses sunlight to restore 25% health) Sweet Scent (Decreases target's evasion) Double Edge (Powerful tackle, 33% recoil damage) Petal Dance (Powerful sp. attack, confuses user) Solar Beam (Very powerful beam, requires time to charge solar energy) (*Cues: Reflection Cave - Pokémon X/Y*) Boomstick: When I find flowers that can do that, I might actually take up gardening. “That would be the world's most deadliest garden!” Applebloom smirked before turning to Applejack. “Say sis…” “NO.” “I wouldn't mind adding a few flowers like that to my garden…” Spike smiled… before noticing the looks he was getting. "What? I have hobbies!” Boomstick (and Spike): Try and pollinate now, bees! Wiz: In real life, celestially powered lasers rely on heated magnesium combustion. In order to fire, the Solar Beam's temperature needs to be over 6,700 ºF. Unfortunately, the Solar Beam is so powerful, it takes twice as long to perform as any other attack. As a Grass and Poison type, Venusaur is extremely effective against Water-type Pokémon. (*Cues: Successor Korrina - Pokémon X/Y*) Boomstick: But keep him away from Flying and Fire types. Because, as we all know, plants burn, and birds fucking hate grass. “I get the fire weakness, but what's with the weakness to flying types?" Starlight asked in curiosity. Twilight thought for a moment. “Well, if I had to guess I'd say that flying is also a wind element and powerful winds can rip apart plants.” “Ohhh” said the rest of the group in understanding. Wiz: Yet Venusaur's well-rounded skills and tricky moveset could outsmart the competition. “Sometimes brain beats brawn,” stated Starlight, getting a few nods. Pros & Cons Effective against: Fighting, Water, Grass, Electric, Fairy Weak against: Flying, Fire, Psychic, Ice Pro: Diverse move set Pro: Great status effecting moves Con: Little specialization Con: Too few effective Sp. Attacks to justify above average stat Kanto Pokédex: Venusaur, the final form of the Bulbasaur evolution. This Seed Pokémon soaks on the sun's rays as a source of energy. “I'll bet Tree Hugger would like him.” Fluttershy said with a Smile. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ The group liked the grass type for its varying move pool and Twilight like the fact someone would need to use strategy for it. “I’m rooting for Venusaur!,” cheered Apple Bloom. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Blastoise (*Cues: Fighting Spirit - Pokémon Anime*) Wiz: The second starter Pokémon evolves from Squirtle, to Wartortle and finally, to Blastoise, the Shellfish Pokémon. Boomstick: So how did this thing come about?! (Shows stage in the background that shows all the events he describes) Did a turtle get really drunk one night, and then come across a tank and was like, "Eh, I'll put my dick in that!" Then nine months later, the tank showed up at his door and was like "BOOM! This is yours." Then he raised it out of shame, until one day it evolved and all the other turtles were like "THAT'S FUCKING AWESOME!" So then they all started plowing tanks?! By the time he finished everyone was on the floor holding their sides as they laughed at such a ridiculous story. “Ok i have to admit that was funny,” laughed Rarity as she wiped a few tears from her eyes. Background Species: Shellfish Pokémon Type: Water Height: 5'3" Weight: 189 lbs. Natural Habitat: Lakes & Islands Personality: Stubborn, Solitary, Warrior Mentality (*Cues: Team Rocket's Secret Strategy - Pokémon Anime*) Wiz: Suurree, why not...? (*cue Fighting Spirit again*) Blastoise firmly boasts defense over offense, using his weighty bulk to outlast and overpower foes. Like a stone firm upon the shore, he can take wave after wave of punishment. “That’s actually a pretty smart thing to do,” Starlight said, stroking her chin. Boomstick: As poetic as that was, he won't be winning any marathons. He's almost as slow as a tortoise, which makes sense, unlike the giant guns sticking out of his back! “Oh! What if he turned around, retreated into his shell, and used the cannons to fly backward?!” Scootaloo said, already imagining how fast it would go. “Then he couldn't see where he would be going,” pointed out Sweetie Bell getting a blush from Scootaloo, for not thinking about that little issue. Statistics HP: 268 (Average) Attack: 171 (Below Average) Defense: 205 (Above Average) Sp. Attack: 215 (Average) Sp. Defense: 193 (Above Average) Speed: 161 (Average) Abilities: Torrent (increases water powers) Rain Dish (recovers HP in rain) (*Cues: Legendary Pokémon Battle - Pokémon X/Y*) Wiz: Blastoise can significantly reduce incoming damage with Iron Defense, barrel through hazards with Rapid Spin, and guard against any and all attacks with Protect. “Looks like it can protect itself from anything,” Applejack said as she whistled. “You think it could takes the elements if you girls still had them?” Spike asked his friend/sister. “I’m not sure to tell the truth,” Twilight said, shrugging. Boomstick: He can chomp foes with Bite and crack heads with Skull Bash, but most of his arsenal focuses on water power, blasting foes with Water Gun, Water Pulse, Aqua Tail and...Bubbles! “FUCKING BUBBLES!” All of a sudden a light tan colored earth pony with glasses and a goatee wearing a black cap and red tie came out of nowhere scaring the group right before disappearing right before their eye’s. “Wha-what was that?” asked a confused Twilight not believing what happened. Starlight just as confused said. “That just came out of nowhere with no sense of-” “TIMING!” screamed a ghost before it to disappeared just like the weird earth pony. “Ok this is just getting weird,” muttered Rainbow Dash. “Agreed this weird events are coming out of nowhere and disappearing too fast to even be considered important to the plot,” said Rarity. “A BIG LIPPED ALLIGATOR MOMENT!” “... is that you Deadman?” asked Applejack with a flat look pointed upward as if Deadman was watching them from the heavens… she really should be looking somewhere more south. (hey fuck you man!) “NO!” scream the voice of the chaos god. Everyone besides the confused members of the CMC just gave him a flat look. “... Ya.” admitted the voice in defeat. Wiz: But despite it's lack of attack type diversity, Blastoise can maximize its watery weaponry with Rain Dance, a rain storm that amplifies Water type moves and blocks out the sun. “That's so cool!” cheered Sweetie Belle with stars in her eyes. Boomstick: But his ultimate attack is Hydro Pump, where he blasts water out of his twin cannons with enough force to accurately punch through steel at a range of 160 feet. Moveset Tackle Tail Whip Iron Defense (drastically increases Defense stat) Rapid Spin (can clear ground hazards, like spikes) Protect (shields from all attacks) Flash Cannon Bite Skull Bash (requires time to charge up power) Water Gun Water Pulse (may confuse target) Aqua Tail Bubble (may lower target's speed) Rain Dance (creates rainfall, which increases water moves by 50%) Hydro Pump (ultra-powerful water cannon with 80% hit rate; can punch through steel) (*Cues: Kanto Elite Four/Gym Battle Theme - Pokémon Anime*) Wiz: High pressure water jet cutters are used industrially to cut through metal with at least 55,000 PSI, or pounds per square inch. By measuring Blastoise's cannons in comparison to his size, we can tell his Hydro Pump has a power of 90,000 PSI. Boomstick: That'll get the stains off your patio! Along with, your patio and possibly house. “Ya think,” snarked Sweetie Belle getting a proud look from her sister. Wiz: Blastoise is effective against Fire type Pokémon, but weak to Grass and Electric. “Well i gauss you could beat him huh?” asked Fluttershy while her Pichu puffed out its chest in Pride. Boomstick: And when he's not battling, Blastoise can be found training on secluded islands to strengthen his combat skills. Wiz: If it plays it's defenses right, Blastoise just might outlast everyone. “Sometimes the best offense is a good defence,” lectured Twilight. “Don’t you think you're a little biased with your Brother being the master of defence?” asked Rainbow dash with a smirk, getting an embarrassed Blush from her friends as an answer. Pros & Cons Effective Against: Fire, Water, Ice, & Steel Pro: Great Defensive Potential Pro: Can shoot through steel Weak Against: Grass & Electric Con: Lacks options for attacks Con: Not very fast or mobile Kanto Pokédex: Blastoise's strength lies in it's power, rather than it's speed. It's shell is like armor, and attacks from the hydro cannons on it's back are virtually unstoppable. “That has to be the most awesome turtle I've ever seen!" Rainbow said, completely guessing over the awesomeness of said Pokémon. “What about Tank?” Pinkie asked. “He's the most awesome tortoise, big difference.” ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ The group had to admire the walking fortress like Pokemon and it small but powerful attacks. “Blastoise all the way,” cheered Sweetie belle. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Charizard (*Cues: Pokémon I Choose You - Pokémon Anime*) Wiz: The final starter Pokémon evolves from Charmander, to Charmeleon, and finally, to Charizard, the Flame Pokémon. Boomstick: I would so ride that into battle! “Me too!” Scootaloo smiled. Wiz: Well, that could be tough. A full grown Charizard is only five-foot seven-inches tall. Boomstick: What?! That's bullshit! I wanna ride a dragon to burn the villages of my enemies, not hang out with it on the sofa. “Hey we dragons like to just hang out to you know!” yelled Spike before giving an annoyed huff at the blatant Stereotypes about dragons. Background: Species: Flame Pokémon Type: Fire & Flying Height: 1.7 m / 5'07" Weight: 90.5 kg / 199.5 Ilbs Natural Habitat: Mountains, Valleys Personality: Aggressive, Prideful, Warrior Mentality Wiz: Despite its size, Charizard is extremely fast and extremely powerful. It's Speed and Special Attack eclipse the other two starters' twice over, the trade off being unfortunate frailty. Boomstick: But since he can fly, it's pretty hard to get ahold of him. “He’s got a point. Charizard is harder to hit when it flies around,” Rainbow said, wondering how fast that dragon could go. Statistics HP: 266 - Average Attack: 173 - Below average Defense: 161 - Below Average Sp. Attack: 223 - Above Average Sp. Defense: 175 - Average Speed: 205 - Above Average (*Cues: Victory Road Theme - Pokémon X/Y*) Wiz: Charizard's move set is incredibly diverse, ranging from the obvious fire breath to flying, dragon, and even ghost type attacks. “That’s impressive,” Twilight said simply. “Impressive? More like AWESOME,” Rainbow, Spike and Scootaloo said at the same time. Boomstick: At close range, he'll always have an edge up, by using either Slash, Dragon Claw, or Shadow Claw; He can strike from above with Wing Attack or Air Slash; but his real strength lies in the flames. He'll burn and bite you with Fire Fang, trap you in a vortex of embers with Fire Spin; smash you apart with Flare Blitz... Wiz: At the cost of self inflicted recoil damage. “Ouch. That’s not a move you should use a lot,” Scootaloo said as she winced a bit. Boomstick: ...And of course, burn you to cinders with Flame Burst or Flamethrower. Wiz: Charizard can reportedly burn through solid stone. This means his Flamethrower reaches temperatures over 2,000 degrees Fahrenheit. “Woah,” Spike said, amazed by Charizard’s breathe. Move Set Scratch Growl Smokescreen Dragon Rage Slash Dragon Claw Shadow Claw (Ghost-type move with increased Critical-hit chance) Air Slash Wing Attack Fire Fang Heat Wave Fire Spin (Traps target in vortex of flame) Flare Blitz (Powerful flaming tackle, deals 33% recoil damage) Flame Burst (Burns surrounding area, hits multiple targets) Flamethrower (Powerful flame stream, May burn target, Can melt boulders) Boomstick: Charizards are aggressive and warrior-like, and will actively seek fights with stronger opponents. “That can make them very dangerous,” Rarity said, imagining one getting stronger than Twilight or the princesses. Wiz: The Fire and Flying type combination makes Charizard doubly effective against Grass Pokémon, but weak to Water types. If it spends too much time in a heavy rainstorm, its flame will go out... permanently. “The Flame on it’s tail is it’s life!?” gasped out Fluttershy along with everything else Pros & Cons Effective against: Grass, Bug, Steel, Fire, Fighting, Fairy Weak against: Rock, Water, Electric Pro: Great speed & maneuverability Pro: Immune to ground-type attacks Con: Frail defense Con: Difficult to raise & control Boomstick: But he's so fast and deadly, he might just overpower his enemies before they know what hit 'em. Unova Pokédex: Charizard, the Flame Pokémon. When competing in intense battles, Charizard's flame becomes more intense as well. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ The group wear really impressed with Charizard’s rw power. “I’m so rooting For Charizard!” yelled Scootaloo. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Wiz: All right. The contestants are ready. Let’s end this debate once and for all. Boomstick: It's time for a Death Battllllllleeeeee with the pokemon! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Death Battle (*Cues: Pokémon X and Y - Pokémon Center*) In a forest clearing on a sunny day, a wild Bulbasaur, Squirtle and Charmander are all sitting around happily. “Aw… they all look so cute!” cooed the CMC and Fluttershy. Suddenly, a claw-like machine appears and drops in a massive amount of at least 300 Rare Candies, covering up the three starter Pokémon. “YAY! Free candy!” Pinkie cheered. Then after a brief moment, bright lights start emitting from the pile of level increasing sweets. “WHAT THE HECK WAS IN THAT CANDY?!” Starlight asked “... Poke Steroids?” half answered half asked Pinkie Pie with a shrug. (*Cues: Super Smash Bros. Brawl - Victory Road*) After an explosion of light which knocked away all the Rare Candies, we see three new, fully evolved, maxed out Pokémon: A quadruped dinosaur-like creature with a large fully bloomed flower on its back, Venusaur, the Seed Pokémon. A large, blue turtle standing on its back-legs with what appears to be water cannons sticking out from its shell, Blastoise, the Shellfish Pokémon. And an anthropomorphic lizard with wings on its back which made it resemble a dragon with a flame burning on its tail, Charizard, the Flame Pokémon. FIGHT! The battle begins with Charizard leaping straight up into the air. He turns around and charges at Blastoise, hitting the turtle with Slash. Blastoise then uses Withdraw, going into its shell, and then follows it up with Iron Defense. Charizard then comes back, trying to attack Blastoise again, but several strikes and a Flamethrower have no effect on the Shellfish Pokémon's upped defenses. “Going to need to do better than that,” bragged Sweetie Belle getting a growl of frustration from Scootaloo. “Grrr… Go Charizard. You can do it,” Scootaloo yelled excitedly. Venusaur then joins the fray, attacking both Pokémon with Razor Leaf. Blastoise takes no damage, staying in it's shell, but Charizard does take some. The dragon, ignoring Venusaur then picks up Blastoise, flies into the air and throws the Water-type to the ground. Blastoise uses Rapid Spin in midair and aims itself at Venusaur, hitting him head on. “That looks painful,” Applejack said, wincing a bit. “Yeah. I don’t want to be hit by that,” Pinkie said, wincing as well. Blastoise jumps away from the dinosaur and finally comes out of its shell and attack Venusaur again with a Skull Bash, knocking the dinosaur back a bit. Charizard then makes a comeback, hitting Blastoise with a Flare Blitz, but it does no damage, and the two are locked in a power struggle, with neither one making any progress. “Another battle of unstoppable force meets the immovable object,” Applejack muttered to herself. Behind them, Venusaur uses Synthesis to heal himself, and then Sweet Scent to lower his opponent's evasion. Charizard and Blastoise stop their battle, wondering what is happening. Venusaur then uses Sleep Powder to try and put his foes to sleep. The effects start to take a toll on the two, but Charizard flies up to avoid them just before they take complete effect, and Blastoise retreats to it's shell and uses a second Iron Defense before succumbing to the effects of the powder. “Smart Move on his part now he’s protected while the other two fight,” said Twilight with some respect. Venusaur targets the fleeing Charizard with Vine Whip to catch the large lizard by the tail and hold him still as he prepares to fire a Solar Beam. However, with a mighty roar, the fire/flying Pokémon escapes from the Vine Whip's grasp and charges straight for Venusaur. But before he can get to him, Venusaur finishes charging and fires the Solar Beam at Charizard, who quickly retaliates with a Flamethrower. “HIT THE DECK!" yelled Spike. The two attacks collide, and both are equally powerful. The attacks continue to go, as Charizard is seen attempting to close in on the Grass type, but Solar Beam is beginning to get a slight edge over Flamethrower. But soon enough, the attacks created a huge explosion as the screen fades to black… “EXPLOSIONS!!!” Pinkie yelled while waving her arms. “We know, Darling,” Rarity said, glaring at the party mare. (*Cues: Pokémon X/Y - Battle! Lysandre (Guitar)*) When the screen returns the environment is a complete wasteland. Venusaur is surrounded by dust, making it hard to see. Venusaur looks around to see where his opponents have gone. He sees nothing, but then out of the dust Charizard flies in with a Wing Attack straight at Venusaur. Charizard strikes the Seed Pokémon, ripping Venusaur's flower off as it roars in pain. Charizard then retreats after completely cutting through the Seed Pokémon and fires a Flame Burst, which surrounds Venusaur. The plant monster roars as it tries to escape the flames, and struggles twice, letting out a final roar into the air before ultimately dying. “.... ow,” winced AppleBloom feeling bad that her chosen Pokemon lost like that. “Ya..” everyone else agreed. Feeling bad for the plant Pokemon. The scene then switches over to a still sleeping Blastoise as Venusaur's ripped off flowers rolls by like a tumbleweed. Some dust/smoke goes into the turtle's shell causing it to sneeze itself awake. Upon coming to, he looks at his remaining adversary Charizard on the other side of the wasteland. “Oh come on. The loud explosion turning the forest into a wasteland didn’t wake him up but a sneeze did?” Twilight asked, wanting to rant about that. (*Cues: Pokémon FRLG - Kanto Trainer Battle (Remix)*) The screen starts flashing, as it eventually breaks into black and a Pokéball comes down and toward the viewer, in reference to the start of wild battles in the Pokémon games. “HA HAH! Fan service!” laughed Pinkie Pie with a black eyepatch. Blastoise starts off with Rain Dance to make the battle more favorable to him in the final showdown. As the rain comes down, the two Pokémon simply stand there. Then with a crash of lightning, the two roar and commence their final fight. “So cool!” muttered the CMC as they watch the tv with wide eyes. Charizard uses multiple Slashes but on his last strike as he tries to slash Blastoise's head, the Water-type tilts it at the last second making Charizard miss and leaving him vulnerable. Blastoise uses Bite on Charizard's neck and the Fire-type begins to bleed and in agony uses Fire Spin on the ground which surrounds them in flames. Blastoise then grabs a hold of Charizard's wings and uses Skull Bash and we see blood come out from behind them, but Charizard comes back and begins to chomping on Blastoise's head multiple times, causing him to bleed heavily just above his left eye. Blastoise then lets out a roar and with all his strength rips Charizard's wings off as he is launched away from the force, landing away with a closed eye that's covered in blood, but the bleeding stops after a few seconds. “No, Charizard. Fight back,” Scootaloo said to the screen. As the two Pokémon try to get up from their injuries, Blastoise gets up much faster and uses this as his opportunity to attack. As Charizard gets up, Blastoise grabs his throat. Charizard tries to use Flamethrower, but Blastoise uses both hands to grip Charizard's neck, causing him to choke it back, and the attack is stopped. Blastoise bends over and begins shooting a Hydro Pump directly into Charizard's mouth. Charizard begins to distend due to being filled with all the water. Blastoise lets go of Charizard with a roar, and launches Charizard into the air. Blastoise continues to accurately shoot water into his midair opponent's mouth, until Charizard bursts out into a big, bloody mess from the water inside him. “This caused the group to go green in the Face. “Well that was a sucky way to die,” muttered Spike. As the Rain Dance ends and the Fire Spin is extinguished, Blastoise yells out a triumphant roar. The Shellfish Pokémon then proceeds to eat the remains of Venusaur's flower while Charizard's remains are shown on the ground, all covered in blood as the flame on its tail goes out. “Um, guess it was hungry?” Fluttershy asked while hiding behind Doomguy plushie. “Too soon, Fluttershy,” Twilight said, pointing at the shocked CMC. K.O.! Results (*Cues: Total War - Pokémon Anime*) Boomstick: CHARIZARD! Noooo! Oh, and Froggy-Plant-whatever-asaur. “Really?” asked the Apple Sibling with flat looks. Wiz: Charizard's greater speed allowed first attack, and it's proud warrior mentality lead to striking Blastoise first. “Which was a stupid idea to attack the thing with your biggest weakness,” Spike said unimpressed. Boomstick: But Venusaur knew he had to take Charizard down right away, so everyone's favorite fire lizard was doomed, taking too much damage early on from two different angles. “Sadly that’s what happens when your the biggest threat,” said Starlight in a matter of fact tone. Wiz: But poor Venusaur didn't stand a chance against Charizard's dual typing, and the bulky defense of Blastoise was more than enough to outlast both of them. Also since Charizard and Venusaur do not naturally learn Sunny Day, they could not counter the Rain Dance. Boomstick: "But Wizard, shouldn't they all just counter each other?!" Wiz: Ah, yes, the 'rock-paper-scissors' factor is a bit tricky; grass beats water, water beats fire, fire beats grass; but ultimately, the core of any Pokémon battle boils down to mathematics. Every attack does a specific amount of damage, with specific effects to specific types with a specific accuracy. “AWW YA MATH!” cheered Twilight with a hoof pump (fist pump.) with a huge grin. “Neeerd!” yelled Rainbow Dash… before getting a pillow thrown at her face by a glaring Twilight. “Twilight used pillow throw! It was super effective!” giggled out Pinkie Pie causing everyone else to laugh even Rainbow Dash. Boomstick: And each Pokémon's stats are clearly displayed in the good ol' Pokedex. Wiz: So by comparing every move, effect, choice, order, and likeliness of occurrence, there are over 7,000 possible ways this battle royale could play out. And out of all potential matches, Blastoise wins the majority. “That’s a lot of possiblities,”the CMC said quietly. Boomstick: Even when removing type effectiveness entirely, and pitting attack and special attack against defense and special defense, factoring against health and speed, the turtle tank still takes it. Blastoise H2Owned! “Darn right he did!” Rainbow Dash cheered. Wiz: The winner is Blastoise. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Boomstick: Next time on Death Battle! At first they see nothing until they saw a menacing robot preparing for an attack, when suddenly it opened up it's chest and fired a large devastating laser beam and the screen turned black. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ “That was so cool,” Sweetie said, jumping around her friends in excitement. “But Charizard should have won,” Scootaloo said as she pouted. “At least yours didn’t get beat first,” Applebloom grumbled to herself. Seeing her older sister and friends walk towards a glowing box, Applebloom asked, “What’re they doing?” “They’re going to the box to get stuff,” Scootaloo said, taking flight. “We gotta see what we’ll get,” she said, flying to her idol. Sweetie and Applebloom soon followed as they heard what Scootaloo got and were excited to get some cool stuff as well. Once they were in front of the box with the older mares, Starlight used her magic to open the box and look inside. Taking a quick look, Starlight pulled out a bunch of T-shirt with all three starters on them and handed them out to everyone but the three fillies in the group. Before anyone could say anything, an unfamiliar voice said, “Don’t even think about asking.” Everyone turned to see a floating blue glowing bubble the size of a baseball. They wanted to ask the most obvious question, when the voice said, “Yes I said it and we’re gonna skip all those questions about Deadman.” “Wait, you know Deadman,” Starlight asked, getting a bit more cautious with the new comer. Her friends had the same idea as they prepared themselves for the worst. “Yes, I know Dumbass,” the voice said monotone like. “Um, you mean Deadman?” Spike asked. “Yes, I mean Dumbass,” the glowing bubble said once more. “Ok? So who’re you?” Rainbow asked, clearly not trusting the bubble. “The name’s Trepp, chaos god of order,” the bubble, Trepp, said. “And current delivery boy.” “Delivery boy? What’re you delivering, Treppy? Cake? Candy?” Pinkie Pie asked, looking at the bubble from all sides. Trepp stayed silent for a moment before saying, “No. I’m here to give those three fillies something.” The older mares and young dragon look at the fillies as Scootaloo walks forward and says, “You have something for me and my friends?” “Yes, by his grand dumbass wisdom, Deadman gives you three these special treats,” Trepp said monotone as three balls appeared in front of each filly. “Speaking of that fiery fellow, where is he?” Applejack asked, much to Trepp’s annoyance. “He’s dealing with some very important things at the moment,” Trepp said a little too quickly for the older mare’s liking. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ meanwhile with Deadman ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ “THIS IS FUCKING BULLSHIT!” Screamed Deadman as he slammed his poker cards down onto the table. “*heh* you just need a better poker face.” said a Blue humanoid dragon as he scooped up most of deadman's poker chips. “FUCK YOU SCALE FACE!” yelled the fiery god of chaos in rage. Another player that looked like it was made up of tornadoes gave of a panic look and tried to calm Deadman down. “(worried wind noise)” “Hahaha! You tell them Windy!” laughed a talking skeleton wearing an old western get up while smoking a cigar. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ “Anyways, it’s nothing for mortals like yourselves to worry about,” Trepp said in a non caring sort of way. “So we got those pokeballs from the episode?” Sweetie asked, lightly poking the one in front of her. The light poke caused the ball to open as a white beam of pure energy came out and landed in front of her. The energy stated to form little arms and legs as the body began to round itself out. The energy began to disappear and show a familiar blue skinned turtle as it said, “Squirtle.” “MY OWN SQUIRTLE?” Sweetie yelled, hugging the turtle happily. The water pokemon gave her a hug back, happy to have a friendly trainer and friend. “She got a pokemon?” Scootaloo and Applebloom said at the same time. Looking at the pokeballs in front of them, the two touch them causing the same beams of light to appear as Bulbasaur and Charmander to appear. “Char char,” Charmander said, waving cutely. “Bulba,” Bulbasaur said. “This is AWESOME,” Applebloom and Scootaloo said, examining their own pokemon. “Fillies with Pokemon? Only that idiot would give children some dangerous monsters,” Trepp said as everyone focused on him. “You mean Deadman gave these cute and cuddly creatures to them?” Fluttershy asked as Pichu walked towards its fellow pokemon and greeted them. The three new pokemon waved at the electric mouse, causing the shy caretaker to squee in joy. “Yes, now I need to go and make sure that dumbass doesn’t destroy anything important,” Trepp said, getting ready to leave. “Wait,” Scootaloo said as she ran towards the chaos god with her wrapped package. Looking down at the filly, Trepp said, “What do you want little filly?” “Well, when you see Mr. Deadman, can you give him this for me,” Scootaloo said, holding out the wrapped package. Trepp made a glowing blue hand that took the package from the filly as he began to inspect it. Glancing at the filly once more, Trepp said, “Mr. Deadman, huh? Never thought I would hear that in my life. Very well, I’ll make sure he gets it.” Trepp’s bubble began to vibrate as it popped and let out a “SQUEAK” noise and disappeared from sight. It was quiet for a few moments before Applebloom said, “Let’s have a Pokemon Battle.” “Not in my castle girls!” Twilight screamed. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ (Meanwhile with Trepp) Trepp appeared back in a galaxy like room as he made his way to the center of it. As he got closer to his usual spot, Trepp could swear he heard the sound of a man swearing up a storm as Deadman’s back became more visible. “Hey, package delivery,” Trepp said as he walked past his acquaintance and gave him the package. “Huh? But I don’t get mail, except for the love letters from Harmony,” Deadman said, looking at the package in interest. “Those were hate mail and restraining orders you dumbass. Now just open your package,” Trepp said, picking up a book titled “To Hell And Back”. “Who would give me a gift?” Deadman muttered to himself, ripping the paper off without using his hands. Once the paper was off, Deadman could only stare at the gift in front of him. Deadman smiled as he looked at a framed picture of a hand or hoof drawn picture of himself, Rainbow Dash and Scootaloo flying through the air with the words “Thank You” were on the bottom. “... This is going on the fridge,” Deadman said, getting up from his little spot. “We don’t have a fridge,” Trepp said, not looking at him. “Now we do,” Deadman said as a refrigerator appeared out of nowhere. He floated over to it and placed the framed picture on it as a few tears ran down his face. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ CHAPTER END! NEXT TIME Fulgore VS Sektor! Fulgore vs SektorIt was a new day for Spike as he was pacing around the room while holding a scroll. Taking a quick glance at the clock hanging on the wall, he began to pace even faster. “C’mon, when will they get here?” Spike asked himself as he looked at the scroll he was carrying. The scroll was from Twilight and it said that she went with her friends to the spa for the day. Once Spike read the note, he contacted Shining and the others and invited them to watch the next episode. “Are they gonna come or not?” Spike asked himself. Just as he was gonna leave the room, Spike heard a knock coming from the door. Spike ran to the door, bumping into the couch on the way, and opened the door. Right outside the door was Shining Armor, Flash Sentry and Thorax. “Sorry we're late, Sunburst ended up getting the flu and couldn't make it-wait, where is everyone else?" Shining asked. “Big Mac had to make a last-minute delivery to Manhattan and Discord had to skip out on this one, said something about dealing with a “stupid reality-bending dorito named Bill”... he vanished before I could ask for details.” Spike shrugged. “Bummer.” Thorax sighed. “Well we owe it to them to have fun in their place,” Spike said enthusiastically. “Are you ready to watch the next episode?” Before the stallions could even voice their opinion, a familiar feminine voice yelled, “Spike, we’re home early.” “Oh Crabbasket,” Spike muttered causing the stallions to snicker. Spike watched as Twilight walked into view with the rest of her friends following her. “Yeah, Aloe and Lotus had to close early. Shining?” Twilight asked in surprise. “Hey Twiley,” Shining said as Twilight ran over and nuzzled him. “What’re you doing here? Is Cadance here? What about Flurry Heart?” Twilight began to ask as everyone rolled their eyes. “Relax Twiley. Cadance and Flurry Heart are still in the Crystal Empire and Spike wanted to do another guy’s night out,” Shining said, calming Twilight a little bit. The lavender alicorn looked at Spike for an explanation. “Well, you and the girls were gonna be gone for the day so I invited them to watch the episode with me,” Spike said, scratching the back of his head. “You were what?” Twilight asked annoyed. Spike took a step back as Thorax stood in front of him. Clearing his throat, the changeling said, “Please don’t be mad at Spike. He just wanted to hang out with us and watch something with the guys.” “C’mon Twilight. We can’t stay mad at Spike,” Pinkie said, hugging Spike tightly. Twilight looked at the rest of her friends and saw that they agreed with Pinkie and the others. Letting out a sigh, Twilight reluctantly said, “You’re right. I shouldn’t be mad at that but you shouldn’t have sneaked around behind our backs like that.” “Noted,” Spike said as he tried to break Pinkie’s hug. “Well now that that’s done, let’s start this thing,” Flash said, walking towards the couch. “Oh, hi Flash! How are things in the Empire?” Twilight asked the Lieutenant. “Not too bad, though I am hoping to get transferred here sometime soon… my little brother’s been eager to hang out with me when I'm off-duty…” Flash said “You sure that's the only reason you want to transfer?" She asked with a knowing smile. Flash blushed a little. “W-Well, I have been meaning to spend more time with-” Twilight giggled and gently punched his shoulder. “Relax Flash, I'm only teasing.” Twilight used her magic to press the play button and start the episode. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Interlude (*Cues: Invader - Jim Johnston*) Boomstick: Cyborgs... are fucking badass! “I’m already liking this episode,” Rainbow said with a large smirk. Wiz: As someone with my own cybernetic arm that suffers constant glitches, I have to agree! Cyborgs are awesome! “Wow wiz seems excited too,” said Fluttershy. “Ya we- wait did he just say cybernetic arm?” asked Twilight as she focused all of her attention on the show now. ‘Here we go…’ thought Shining Armor and Spike trying to suppress their smirks. Boomstick: Like Fulgore, the metal monster of Killer Instinct. “Sweet! Another Killer Instinct character!” cheered Rainbow Dash. Wiz: And Sektor, the ninja cyborg from Mortal Kombat. “Ninja Cyborg!?” yelled an excited Pinkie Pie. “That is the coolest thing!” cheered Flash with stars in his eye’s. “Of all time,” agreed Shining Armor, with a grin. Boomstick: Totally should've been Cyrax... “Huh? Looks just like the red fella,” commented Applejack. (*Wiz punches Boomstick with his robot arm*) Boomstick: AHAHH! What the hell?! “HA!” laughed Rarity with the biggest grin on her face. Wiz: (*sarcastic tone*) Oh sorry. Arm's glitching up again. Boomstick: When you least expect it, Wiz. When you least expect it. Everyone giggled. Wiz: I'm Wizard and he's Boomstick. And, it's our job to analyze their weapons, armor, and skills to find out who would win a DEATH BATTLE. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Fulgore (*Cues: Fulgore's Theme - Killer Instinct Teaser*) Wiz: In the dystopian world of Killer Instinct, there are no governments, no courts, no nations. There is only the mega corporation that controls the Earth. Boomstick: Wal-Mar- um, UltraTech! Wiz: To tighten his iron grip even further, UltraTech's chairman plotted to build an army of cybernetic enforcers. Thus, he created the deadly sadistic prototype known as Fulgore. (*Cues: Killer Instinct 2: Gold - Fulgore Theme*) Boomstick: Fulgore... now there's a name that will strike fear into your enemies. Just saying it gives me chills. Standing 6'5" with over 500 pounds of reinforced steel, Fulgore is a brutal killing machine. All while rocking a stylish ponytail. Steven Seagal would be proud. “Who’s Steven Seagal?” asked Fluttershy. “Don’t know but he sounds like a cool guy,” answered Rainbow Dash with a shrug. Wiz: Actually, to dupe people into trusting their cyborgs, UltraTech cleverly designed Fulgore to look the part of an honorable knight, helmet plume included. “Devious… but clever…” muttered Shining Armor with a frown. Flash nodded in agreement with his commander. “I really don’t like the idea of a killer robot parading around looking like a knight.” Boomstick: Call it what you want, Wiz: that's a ponytail. “Yeah, I can't really see that as anything else…” Rainbow added. Wiz: Before testing the prototype even began UltraTech had sold over 15 million Fulgore units worldwide, and if RoboCop's ED-209 has taught us anything, that's a bad idea. “Selling an invention before it's even tested? That's as stupid as it is dangerous!” Twilight commented with the group nodding in agreement. “Sounds like something the FlimFlam bros. would try…” Applejack added. “To be fair the FlimFlam brother’s super cider squeezy 6000 at least worked before they put it on overdrive,” commented Fluttershy. Applejack gave what Fluttershy a thought before giving a nod of agreement, even if she was reluctant to it. Background Height: 1.96 m / 6'5" Weight: 249.5 kg / 550 Ibs Manufacturer: Ultratech Cyber-Soldier prototype Artificial Intelligence based on KI Champion Black Eagle (Chief Thunder's younger brother) Mission: Kill Jago, conquer the world! Owner of the Hype Beam Boomstick: Someone finally had the bright idea to see if this thing even worked and entered Fulgore into UltraTech's annual Killer Instinct tournament. “Sounds like a decent idea,” muttered Starlight. “They get to test their toy out on living opponents in a situation where they wouldn't get in trouble with the law.” “Oh? Is this some input from your time as “evil Glimmer”?” joked Rarity, getting a light punch on the shoulder from a blushing Starlight. Wiz: Sure enough, there was a major problem: Fulgore's mechanical body was SO advanced, UltraTech's top scientists could not create an artificial intelligence that could operate it efficiently. “Oops.” Flash deadpanned sarcastically. “I get the feeling a LOT of people wanted their money back…” “This is why you test everything out before sending it into the field.” Twilight nodded. “If I pulled a stunt like that, who knows what Robo-Dash would've done-” Rainbow blinked. “Wait, what?” “Nothing!” “No seriously, what was that about a robot me-” “OH LOOK! MORE BACKSTORY!” Boomstick: Fulgore needed the mind of a true fighting spirit. (*Cues: Killer Instinct (2013) - Thunder Theme*) Boomstick: Enter Eagle, the older brother of current KI combatant Chief Thunder. Wiz: Eagle had entered a previous KI tournament, and won. He used his newfound fame to publicly protest the evils of UltraTech. The people rallied, talk of revolution began to seed. “Good for him! Fight the power!” Pinkie cheered. “*giggle* You sound like Treehugger,” Fluttershy laughed softly. Boomstick: But then some guy at UltraTech, probably the one who wanted to test Fulgore, was like; "Hey! Let's kill Eagle, stop his revolution, then rip out his brain and drop it in our robot." Eagle mysteriously disappeared, Fulgore started kicking ass, and that guy probably got a promotion. The group stared wide eyed and even a few teared up for Eagle. “That is messed up.” muttered Shining with a downcast look. “Maybe I could put Rainbow’s brain in my robot-what am i thinking?! I can't do that to my friend!” Twilight muttered to herself. She shook her head to clear those impure thoughts from her mind. Wiz: With the implanted mind of Eagle, Fulgore effortlessly smashed through foe after foe. However, Eagle still lives somewhere within, constantly fighting to overcome his malicious programming, and horribly ironic situation. “So, it's kind of like Robocop but even more tragic?" Flash asked. "That's just depressing…” Boomstick: Fulgore draws from Eagle's traditional Okichitaw fighting style, which crosses judo, Taekwondo, and Hapkido with short ranged blades. “Those sound pretty impressive,” Thorax said with everyone agreeing with him. Wiz: Like his quad plasma claws, which can cut through almost any metal with temperatures over 30,000*F. Boomstick: In addition he's equipped with everything a badass killer cyborg should have: Plasma Storm fireballs, a Reflector to bounce back projectiles, a Cyber Port, a cloaking device, and laser eyes for flair. “Well of course everything needs flare darling!” sang Rarity in delight. “Even killer robots?” asked Applejack with a raised brow. The fashionista just gave her southern friend a stern look and simply said, “everything.” Move Set Plasma Claws Plasma Storm - Fulgore shoots out a plasma wave projectile from his claws. Can be done three times. Eye Laser - Fulgore emits an laser from his eyes. Also can be perform in the air. Reflector - Fulgore emits a reflective blue energy shield that surrounds his entire body granting him the ability repel projectiles that are thrown at him. Cyber Dash - Fulgore moves at Quick Speed hitting the opponent with his plasma claw. Cyber Port - Fulgore's body turns black, enabling him reappear in front or behind the opponent. Cloaking Device Devastation Beam (*Cues: Killer Instinct (2013) - Fulgore Theme*) Wiz: And when his foe's time grows short, Fulgore uses one of four overwhelming finishers called "No Mercies". Fulgore proceeded to finish off T.J. Combo by detaching his head from his body as a GIANT turret popped out and began shooting his opponent to death. “I-I, but he-I just-HOW?!” Thorax stuttered. “B-b-b-but…” stuttered out Twilight in similar confusion. Boomstick: (Stammers) I don't even... where was he keeping that?! And how can he even see where he's aiming?! “I HAVE SO MANY QUESTIONS!” yelled the princess of magic. Wiz: Fulgore's strength is staggering, but where does all this power come from? Hidden within his armored chassis is... Boomstick: That giant fucking turret somehow! “Yeah seriously, HOW?!” yelled a frustrated Rainbow Dash. No Mercies Turret Morph - Fulgore changes his head into a turret-like gun and shoots the opponent repeatedly. Laser Site - Fulgore laser blasts the opponent to death. Machine Morph - Fulgore changes into a battle machine and shoots the opponent repeatedly. Terminator - Fulgore sends out a targeting light. Once it locks on, it obliterate the opponent. Wiz: ...a nuclear reactor, which powers everything at his disposal. Fulgore can manually overclock this reactor, increasing its charge multiple times. Boomstick: At max charge he gains a massive power increase, doubling his speed and allowing him to fire a giant laser of doom: the Devastation Beam. Fulgore opened up his chest compartment and unleashed a massive red beam of destruction. “WOAH!” “AWESOME!!” “Ah haven't seen the beam that powerful since the time Twilight fought against Tirek!” Applejack exclaimed. Reactor Power source Charges up through: Activated charge Auto-triple attacks Instinct mode Full charge required for Devastation Beam Full charge increases speed & power (*Cues: Fulgore's Theme - Killer Instinct Teaser*) Boomstick: With something like that, he's gotta be unstoppable. Wiz: Almost, until he met the warrior monk Jago who literally tore him apart. “Dang…” muttered Spike. “There's always a bigger fish in the sea.” said Shining Armor. Wiz: Despite the dismemberment UltraTech still had plans for their mechanical butcher. He was rebuilt stronger, faster, and with a new mission: find and kill his rival Jago, a mission Fulgore never completed. Boomstick: He came so close, but then the little wuss called in his god-slaying sister Orchid and double-teamed him into destruction. “Wait, Orchid beat him?!” Spike chuckled. “What, did she flash him into submission?” “System overload! Boobies too perfect!” Pinkie shouted in an over the top robot voice. “DOES NOT COMPUTE. DOES NOT COMPUTE.” “... sigh, i’m not even mad.” muttered Twilight. Boomstick: Still, Fulgore is a monster, annihilating anyone who gets in his way. Well, nearly anyone. Bitch. Feats & Faults + Defeated T.J. Combo effortlessly + Defeated Orchid + Mind of a former KI Champion - Beaten by Orchid & Jago together - Had yet to defeat Jago - Charging reactor severely opens up defenses Fulgore performs a 40-hit Ultra Combo on Sabrewulf. Announcer: ULTRAAAAA COMBOOOOO! Twilight glanced over to her friends and noticed something. “Spike? Are you crying?” “It's… so beautiful,” Spike said as manly tears ran down his face. Flash sniffled as he wiped his eyes. “Such carnage, such power…” Rainbow added. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ The group was on the fence on this one but they admit Folgore was a literal death machine. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Sektor (*Cues: The Tower - Mortal Kombat 9*) Wiz: Earth was in grave danger. The interdimensional overlord, Shao Kahn, was one victory away from conquering the human world. “Oh, great. THIS jerk again!” Rainbow scoffed upon hearing the name of the death battle victor. Boomstick: In order to stack up with Kahn's invading monsters, the grand master of the Lin Kuei clan of assassins came up with a plan SO crazy, it just might work. Wiz: "Let's turn all of our ninjas into robots!" Everyone went silent for a few seconds, letting that idea sink in. “So… awesome!” Rainbow and Flash whispered with stars in their eyes and barely restrained glee. Boomstick (And, Rainbow, Flash, Pinkie, and Spike): That guy is my fucking hero. (*Cues: Mortal Kombat 9 - The Courtyard Night*) Wiz: Thus, the cyber initiative was created. The screen changed to show the very gruesome procedure of undergoing the surgical experiment, with bloody wires and metal sticking out of their skin. “On second thought, I'd rather NOT go through that.” Flash shivered. “Ditto,” everyone else said as the gruesome images would haunt them tonight. Wiz: The first and only willing member of the Lin Kuei to undergo the mechanization was the grand master's own son, Sektor. Background Height: 1.85 m | 6'1" Weight: 139 kg | 300 lbs Model number LK-9T9 Former member of the Lin Kuei Tekunin Grandmaster Fighting Styles Ninjitsu Sambo Kenpo Boomstick: Who names their kid Sektor? It's like the day his child was born, he like's, "I'm going to give you this cool cyber name, just in case I ever pull off my crazy as shit plan to turn everyone I know into robots." “Got agree on that one, with a name like that you were pretty much torpedoing him into a certain lifestyle…” Starlight stated. “I mean, it's like naming your child Sharpshot and then being surprised when he gets a job as a sniper.” “Pot meet kettle…” muttered Deadman’s voice though no one seemed to hear him. Sektor: I will show no mercy! Wiz: Sektor was already an unrivaled assassin, and master of ninjitsu, sambo and kenpo. Boomstick: As a cyborg, he's all that, plus extra armor and a never ending supply of missiles. Wiz: Why would a ninja, master of the silent kill, use a missile launcher? Thorax tilted his head. “I have to agree, even if it is a cyborg ninja, they're called masters of the silent kill for a reason-” “Thorax, any argument that has the the words “cyborg ninja” in it quickly becomes invalid because of how awesome it is!" Flash stated firmly as they continued to watch. Boomstick: He's also got two flamethrowers on his wrists, a cloaking device, a laser pistol, a teleporting rocket punch, and lightsabers. Wiz: They're actually called pulse blades. Boomstick: They're definitely lightsabers. Sweet royalty-free lightsabers. “Yay! More lightsabers!” cheered Pinkie Pie. Sektor opened up his chest as four missiles hovered next to him and a few were launched at his opponent Mileena… which obliterated her entire torso and sent her arms, chest, and head into the air… and then the remaining four missiles locked onto them and blew them up all at once. The entire group winced at the brutality of such an attack… “Yikes…” muttered Spike. Move Set Chest Missile Double Missile Homing Missile Upward Missile Rocket Punch Flame Burner (A flamethrower) Cloaking Device Laser Pistol Pulse Blades (*Cues: The Subway - Mortal Kombat 9*) Wiz: To close a kill Sektor finishes foes with a brutal fatality, like the Robo-Sek, Missile Strike, or the Compactor. The screen then showed Sektor summoning a HUGE compactor out of his chest and crushing his victim (Sonya Blade) into paste. “...I'm not even going to BEGIN to go into what's wrong with that.” Starlight deadpanned. “But how-” “Thorax, it's a CYBORG NINJA, questions invalid! Enjoy the awesome!” yelled Flash. Boomstick: Okay, how do these robo guys keep all this impossible shit in their chests? Do they have black holes for hearts or something? “That’s what i want to know,” Twilight said as her eye began to twitch. Fatalities Compactor Flamethrower Scarecrow Missile Strike: A single, powerful missile Robo-Sek: Fires five missiles at once Wiz: Regardless of the storage quandary Sektor's compactor can crush a human being in mere seconds. At minimum, crushing an entire human body into paste requires nearly 2 tons of pressure. The new Sektor proved invaluable, aiding Shao Kahn in multiple Mortal Kombat tournaments against the defenders of humanity, and after Kahn discovered a loophole around the tournament's rules, Sektor led the Lin Kuei in the invasion of Earthrealm. Boomstick: But despite the pure badassery of being a robo-ninja, not everybody wanted to do it. Wiz: Fearing the loss of mind and soul, a few Lin Kuei managed to escape. Sektor was tasked with hunting these traitors and dragging them back to the grand master, dead or alive. The list of defectors included a young ninja named Sub-Zero. (*Cues: The Armory - Mortal Kombat 9*) Boomstick: Mecha Sektor was nearly unstoppable. He slaughtered the clan's enemies by the dozens, without batting so much as a robo-eye, but no matter how hard he tried, he could never take down that poster boy Sub-Zero. Wiz: Until Raiden reset the timeline and practically gift-wrapped him. “Why is it that time travel seems to only make things worse in the grand scheme of things?” Starlight sighed in disappointment. Wiz: However, Sektor's transformation was not perfect. While his cybernetics enhanced his body, they had a different effect on his mind. In just a few years, Sektor unraveled, tumbling deeper and deeper into an inescapable well of insanity. Feats & Faults + Defeated Smoke + Defeated Hydro with Cyrax + Assassinated Lin Kuei Grandmaster - Lost Grandmaster title to Sub-Zero - Has yet to defeat Sub-Zero - Mentally insane (*Cues: The Living Forest - Mortal Kombat 9*) Wiz: Mad with power, Sektor murdered his own father, intending to take the title of grand master for himself. The group glared at the screen after hearing that. “Monster,” Twilight hissed out. Boomstick: Until Sub-Zero showed up and totally ninja'd that shit, and then kicked him out of the Lin Kuei for good. Bummer. “Awww~ ya! This Sub-Zero is sounding more like the COOLEST guy out there!” said Rainbow Dash. getting a few glares from her friends. “That pun was bad and you should feel bad…” muttered Starlight. Wiz: Sektor was alone: his only companions the twisted voices in his head. Eventually he managed to found his own clan of cyber warriors, the Tekunin. Sektor now roams the realms, hungry for Mortal Kombat. Boomstick: MORTAL KOMBAAAAT! (Hums theme) Smoke: You actually did it: you're a cyborg! Sektor: We are the Lin Kuei: more stealthful than the night. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ After hearing about Sektor the group where now rooting for Folgore. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Wiz: Alright the combatants are set. Let's end this debate once and for all. Boomstick: *Finishes singing* Death Battle! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Death Battle Sektor runs around an industrial warehouse owned by UltraTech until he crashed into Fulgore, who was using his cloaking device, immediately deactivating it. Sektor then teleports a few steps away from Fulgore. “Well that’s one way to start a battle,” Thorax said. (*Cues: Killer Instinct (2013) - Fulgore Theme*) FIGHT! Fulgore slowly walks towards Sektor, who fires a missile from his chest. Fulgore deflects the missile with his reflector. Fulgore then uses Cyber Dash and Cyber Port to attack Sektor with his plasma claws in a 7-hit combo, knocking Sektor away. (*Brutal combo!*) “Fulgore’s relentless,” Applejack said, taking a bite out of an apple. “C’mon I want to see some awesome robot stuff,” Rainbow said, inching closer to the TV. As Fulgore charges his reactor, Sektor teleports to attack Fulgore, getting in a 5-hit combo. (*Hyper!-*) Sektor then shoots his flamethrowers towards Fulgore, stunning him, then charges at Fulgore with his pulse blades. Fulgore is constantly stunned by Sektor's pulse blades, then manages his timing perfectly, allowing him to break out of Sektor's combo and uppercut him away. (*C-C-C-Combo Breaker!*) “Noooo! My combos!” yelled Pinkie Pie as she had just dropped a her bag of combos at that moment. “He got out of that combo so easily,” Shining said, amazed. Fulgore fires the Plasma Storm three times at Sektor, and continues to charge his reactor. (*Cues: Mortal Kombat - Main Theme (Remix)*) “Fulgore gotta charge his reactor faster,” Twilight said, taking notes on the battle. Sektor then activates Robo-Sek, firing five missiles at Fulgore, but Fulgore sees this and fires his laser eyes at Sektor's missiles. As all of that transpired, Sektor swings from lights on the ceiling, then jumps down and attacks Fulgore until he is paralyzed. Using this opportunity, Sektor unleashes his compactor. “Oh no,” Spike said, fearing the power of the compactor. (*Cues: Mortal Kombat 9 - Battle Plan*) However, Fulgore is able to halt it, holding up the top with his hands, and finishes charging his reactor. “That’s check,” said Starlight with smirk. “He’s so close,” Thorax said desperately. (*Cues: Killer Instinct (2013) - Main Theme*) Now at full charge, Fulgore breaks off Sektor's compactor and then does a 37-hit combo, finishing the fight with the Devastation Beam, which causes Sektor's head, torso, and legs to separate. Fulgore then does his victory pose. As if knowing what was coming, the moment he unleashed his final blast, Rainbow, Pinky, Flash, Spike, and surprisingly Starlight jumped out of their seats and hollered alongside the announcer: (*ULTRAAAAA COMBOOOOO!*) “Woaaaah,” Everyone in the room said at the same time. K.O.! Fulgore transforms using Machine Morph, then fires at Sektor until his body parts explodes. Results (*Cues: Killer Instinct - Fulgore Theme*) Boomstick: Yep, Devastation Beam lives up to its name. “Hell yeah it does,” Rainbow and Spike said at the same time. Wiz: This was a close one. With his ninja abilities, Sektor could easily outmaneuver Fulgore's bulk, but Fulgore had the edge in every other category. He had more options for defensive, close, and long-range combat. Being almost twice as big, his size and strength surmounted Sektor's. And whenever Sektor did get an upper hand, Fulgore simply overclocked his reactor to compensate. “A smart strategy,” Twilight said, writing something down. Boomstick: And while neither of them have successfully defeated their rivals, Sektor has been humiliated by Sub-Zero, over and over; but Fulgore would have won his second duel with Jago if Orchid hadn't stepped in. “So Fulgore could have beaten Jago, huh? Guess that proves He was stronger than Sektor when he couldn’t beat Sub-zero,” Rarity said as she rubbed her chin. Wiz: It took the combined might of two demi-god killers to take Fulgore down. “Well at least Ultratech accomplished what they set out to do with Fulgore,” Flash said, nodding. “Agreed they made a perfect killing machine,” said Shining Armor in agreement. Boomstick: In the end, Sektor got ro-blown up. “I see boomsticks jokes haven't gotten any better…” muttered Thorax. Wiz: The winner is Fulgore. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Boomstick: Next time on Death Battle. At first the group see nothing but soon the silence was crushed when they heard a loud stomping noise. Everypony was completely tense when stoping was getting louder… and closer. Soon they see a colossal monster looking around and before anyone could say anything, it let out a terrifying roar as thunder flashes a few times before the screen fades back to black. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ After the battle, everyone gathered around the glowing box. Pinkie opened the box and began to rummage through it. “Wonder what we’ll get this time,” Spike said outloud. “If it’s anything like the stuff we got before, then it should be pretty cool,” Rainbow said, hovering in the air. Pinkie emerged from the box and said, “ We got shirts.” She then threw shirts at everyone as they grabbed and looked at them. Spike looked at one of the shirts to see Sektor on one side with the words “Mortal Kombat” on the other side. “That’s pretty cool,” Spike said, putting on the shirt. “I have to agree, Spike. These are pretty cool,” Thorax said holding his own shirt of Fulgore use his Devastation Beam with the words “Ultra Combo” below it. “Is there anything else? “ Rainbow asked hopefully. Pinkie dived back into the box as the lids closed. The box moved in a way that it looked like something or someone was fighting a truck inside as screeching was heard. “Um, Pinkie, are you okay in there?” Fluttershy asked, gripping doomguy plushie for safety. The plushie itself holds it’s shotgun in a cute yet threatening manner as it’s theme song played. After about a minute of car screeches and horn blows, Pinkie emerged from the box with a smaller box in her hooves. “Look at what I got,” Pinkie said, waving the box around. “Sweet,” Rainbow said as she tried to grab the smaller box from her party animal of a friend. Pinkie pulled the box out of the way and said, “Sorry Dashie but this has Shining’s name on it.” “Oh c’mon,” Rainbow yelled while pouting like a filly. Pinkie walked towards Shining and gave him the box as he looked at it like a kid at christmas. “Wonder what’s in here?” Shining asked as he opened the box. He then uses his magic to take what was inside out and marvels at the Fulgore helmet replica. “That looks cool, Sir,” Flash said with a smile. Shining noticed that the helmet looked just big enough for a pony’s head. He brought the helmet towards his head and put it on. Once it was on, Shining saw various graphs and numbers appear as he looked at his friends and sister. He even saw various bits of information on how to take them down. “I’m keeping this,” Shining said, taking off the helmet. Twilight pouted and muttered, “I wanted something like that.” “Well we might as well head back. Some of us have work in the morning,” Rainbow said, flying out the window. “She’s right for once. I need to tend to some chores in the morning,” Applejack said, walking out the door with Fluttershy following her. “And I have a party in the morning. Bye bye,” Pinkie said, bouncing out the door as Rarity gracefully followed. “And we need to get back to the Crystal Empire. We need to do this again sometime,” Shining said as he gave Spike and Twilight a hug. Once the heartfelt family moment was done, Shining along with Thorax and Flash left Twilight’s home to return to their own homes. “I should get some sleep. Good night Twilight, Spike,” Starlight said as she walked towards her room. This left Spike and Twilight alone in the viewing room. “Well I’m gonna hit the hay as well,” Spike said as he was floated into the air by a pinkish magical aura. He was turned around to face the stern face of Twilight as she sat there. “We need to talk about going behind other’s backs, Spike,” Twilight said, using her magic to set Spike on the couch. “But you said you weren’t gonna be mad about me inviting the guys,” Spike said, looking a little nervous. “Oh I’m not mad about that anymore. After taking a minute to think about it, you deserve to hang out with the guys every once in awhile,” Twilight said, wave her hoof at that. Spike let out a sigh of relief at that but was still curious on what Twilight meant. “So what did you mean?” Spike asked, shrugging his shoulders. Twilight got a dangerous glint in her eyes and said, “What I mean is that someone found out about Robo-Dash and disassembled it.” “Oh, that’s bad,” Spike said as he began to sweat a bit. “Luckily I had a few cameras that recorded who did it. Now you mind telling me why you did it,” Twilight said, crossing her hooves in front of her. “NNNNnnoooooooooooo,” Spike yelled from his seat. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ CHAPTER END! NEXT TIME GODZILLA VS GAMERA! Godzilla VS Gamera.“So how long do i have to wear this?” Spike asked while sitting on a stoll. On his head was a white cone hat with the word dunce on the it. “Once you learn not to do anything behind my back no matter if your intentions were justified,” Twilight said in her lecture tone while reading a book to pass the time until the next episode. She wouldn’t have to wait very long as the door slammed open as her friends piled into the viewing room. “Hiya Twilight…. Um, what’s up with Spike?” Pinkie asked, tilting her head a bit. “He’s just finishing his time out,” Twilight said nonchalantly. “OOooooohhhh, Spike’s in trouble,” Pinkie and Rainbow said, covering their mouths while snickering as were the rest of the girls. Before Spike could even say a word a new voice cutted in, “Who’s in trouble?” Surprised, everyone jumped and looked to see their other dragon friend Ember in her classic ninja garb. “How did you,” Twilight began to say slowly. Ember smirked and said, “Ninja.” “That’s not really an answer,” Twilight said, trying to process everything. “Niiiiinnnnnjjjjjaaa,” Ember said slowly as if it was the answer to all of life’s questions. It was silent for a few moments as Twilight opened and closed her mouth a few times. Fluttershy, not liking the awkward silence, grabbed her plushie and asked, “Um, do you mind if i ask why’re you here? Not that we don’t want to see you.” She put Doomguy Plushie in front of her to protect herself from any threats. Ember walked over to Spike and said, “Well I came here to hang out with Spike and possibly watch another episode if it’s okay.” She took the dunce hat off of the younger dragon and rubbed his dorsal fins. “Hey, cut it out,” Spike said while laughing a little. “Ey, we have better things to do than play with your dragonfriend,” a high pitched voice said causing everyone to look around. “Who said that?” Pinkie said, turning her head around like an owl. “Well, that's the other reason why I'm here. You see i got a message from a ‘Deadman’,” Ember said as everyone's eyes grew wide. “What did the note say, darling,” Rarity said, walking towards their friend. “It said that after we see the next episode then my father will be cured,” Ember said, blushing while scratching the back of her head. That caused everyone in the room to grow a bit fearful at that. “Was your father poisoned?” Fluttershy asked desperately. “No, he’s fine. It’s just that,” Ember began to say as she blushed. She didn’t know how to say the problem to her friends. “For Pete’s sake child. Stop beating around the bush and tell them,” the voice said as the front of Ember’s ninja outfit moved. “What was that?” Rainbow asked, getting in position to attack if necessary.. “I’ll just show you,” Ember said as she reached into her suit and pulled a small scaled thing out. The group got closer to see what the young dragon lord was holding. When they got close enough, the group had to stop themselves from gasping in surprise or biting their lips to stop themselves from laughing. There in Ember’s hands was the previous dragon lord, Torch, and he was the size of a hamster. “OH MY DIAMONDS. HE’S SO ADORABLE,” Rarity screamed as she hugged the now tiny elder dragon. “Don’t you mean ‘oh my Celestia’?” Twilight asked. “You worship your thing darling, i’ll worship mine,” Rarity said as she didn’t stop hugging the older dragon, no matter how much he threatened her. “.... So Deadman did this?” Applejack said after witnessing her classy friend hug the tiny dragon. After being near Discord and all the evils they fought, nothing surprises her anymore. “That’s what the note said. It also said something about more guests,” Ember said as she took a seat on the couch. “More guests? But it's just us,” Pinkie said while looking at all of her friends in the room. Suddenly a swirling red and purple portal appeared in the center of the room. Everyone stared as three familiar ponies tumbled out of the portal as a VERY familiar voice said, “Stay in the time out room and think about what you’ve done.” As the three ponies groaned, Applejack and Rainbow looked at their pink friend and said, “You had to say something, didn't you?” “Sorry,” Pinkie said bashfully. Another groan drew their attention to the ponies on the floor as one said, “Why did you have to annoy that guy Sonata? That dumbass could have sent us to another dimension.” “I just wanted to watch another episode, Dagi,” the taco lover said as she got up and looked around. “And we're here. Hi girls and dragons,” Sonata said while waving. “Dragons?” Adagio and Aria asked, looking around the room to see the blue dragon princess next to Spike. “Um, hi,” Ember said shyly as she waved. “So is she a new assistant or friend?” Adagio said as she looked at Twilight for the answer. “She’s a friend. Ember meet Adagio, Aria and Sonata. Girls, this is Dragon Lord Ember,” Twilight said, introducing everyone to each other. “Dragon Lord? So what happened to Little Match Stick?” Aria said smirking. “Little Match Stick?” Twilight and her friends asked. “For the love of the everything holy MY NAME ISN’T MATCHSTICK!” Torch screamed from the confines Rarity’s hooves. The former sirens looked at the former dragon lord in surprise before breaking down in hysterical laughter. “That’s Little Match Stick!?” Adagio laughed with tears running down her face. “What happen to you!?” Wheezed out Aria having a hard time breathing with how much she was laughing. “You’re just as adorable as I remember,” Sonata said as she plucked Tiny Torch from Rarity’s hooves and hugged him. “Let go of me you blue haired nitwit,” Torch screamed while try to claw at Sonata’s hooves. It proved to be useless as his clawing was the equivalent of a kitten batting a piece of string. “I thought I was free from you three all those years ago.” “Yep that’s definitely our Matchstick,” Aria said, wiping away a few tears in a rare display of emotion. “You haven’t change since we last saw you,” Adagio said with mirth. “You girls knew Torch?” Twilight asking in shock. She even got in front of them as Sonata continued to cuddle the tiny ex-dragon lord. “Ya~ little matchstick use to date Aria way back,” laughed Adagio much the shock to Ember and the main group. “It feels like it was yesterday that Little Match Stick and Aria were trying to one up each other.” “W-w-w-wha?” stuttered out Ember, trying to process what she just heard. “Father use to date a pony?” “Actually we were sirens back then,” Aria said nonchalantly. “And those were some good times,” she said with a far away look. “Okay?” Ember said confused out of her mind. “Stop hugging me and start this battle thing. The sooner it ends the better,” Torch said as Sonata started to nuzzle him. “Fine, ruin our fun,” Adagio muttered. “Twilight, can you start the episode?” she said while taking a seat on the couch with her sisters. Twilight just shrugged and pressed play on the remote. Interlude (*Cues: Invader - Jim Johnston*) Wiz: Kaiju: the Japanese word for - Boomstick: A giant monster that destroys everything around it, like Godzilla, the King of the Monsters. “K-king of Monster?” squeaked out Fluttershy as she hid behind her doomguy plushy which seemed to have a gleam in it’s visore after the first combatant was announced. “Now that’s a badass title!” Rainbow proclaimed. Wiz: And Gamera, the Guardian of the Universe. Despite being box office rivals for half a century, these two enormous creatures have never met... until today. “So it’s another battle between two characters that the fan base consider rivals?” asked Starlight. “It seems so, now i’m wondering if we are going to see anymore of this- Pinkie Pie what are you doing?” asked Twilight as she noticed her pink friend in the back pointing her party cannon at a dart board with a drawing of what looked like a human wearing a very odd red and black outfit. “Oh just getting ready for a Very special guest,” answered the Party Pony a she set her cannon aside and went back to sit with her friends. Giving her… acentric friend an odd look, Applejack asked. “And who’s that sugarcube?” “Oh~ just someone that EVERYONE can’t wait to see!” giggled Pinkie Pie in pure glee much to the confusion to the rest of the group. “What a freak,” muttered Aria. Boomstick: He's Wiz and I'm Boomstick. Wiz: And it's our job to analyze their weapons, armor, and skills to find out who would win... a Death Battle. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Godzilla (*Cues: Godzilla Appears in Hokkaido - Godzilla VS. King Ghidorah*) Wiz: The year was 1954, less than a decade after Little Boy and Fatman had decimated Japan. Boomstick: The nuclear age had begun. Almost everyone was shocked at the display of the destructiveness of the bomb. Fearing the answer, Fluttershy looked at Twilight and asked, “Do all the humans have that?” With a shake of her head, Twilight said, “Not anymore. That bomb was only used several decades ago and hasn't been used since.” Wiz: As the United States tested their shiny new hydrogen bombs across the Pacific, one of them woke something up. (*Cues: Godzilla Theme - GMK*)(*Godzilla roars*) Boomstick: Godzilla, the radioactive rampaging savior/destroyer of Japan. “...Daddy?” Sonata asked while tilting her head cutely. “Is he a savior or destroyer? Is it possible to be both?” asked Ember. “it depends on morality,” answered Torch. Wiz: Mutated by nuclear energy, Godzilla stands over 300 feet tall and weighs 90 thousand tons. He is an unstoppable force of nature. “That’s big,” “That’s not just big. It's bigger than the largest known dragon in our land,” “Little Ember is right. He’s even bigger than me,” Torch admitted with some resentment in his voice. Boomstick: And for some reason, Godzilla has made Japan his personal playground and has been stomping through it for 60 years. Man: Couldn't he have picked on some other country? Boardroom: *laughs* Everyone was terrified by that fact alone. To be terrorized by that walking behemoth for decades would be scary for any of them. (*Cues: Requiem - Godzilla vs Destoroyah*) Wiz: Godzilla's radioactive mutation leaves everything in his wake contaminated: water, plants, even people. Godzilla's presence alone turns a city block completely uninhabitable. Boomstick: Like that noisy upstairs neighbor or people who let their dog shit in your front lawn. “That sounds horrible,” Fluttershy said as she hugged Doomguy Plushie to her chest. “To never being near someone without harming them,” Pinkie quietly said as her hair began to straighten. “Causing nothing but pain just by existing,” (*Cues: Mothra vs Gigan - Godzilla Final Wars*) Wiz: But Godzilla does not simply walk past his enemies to destroy them. Boomstick: His strength is insane. He once lifted and threw his arch-rival Keizer Ghidorah, who weighs 100 thousand freakin' tons. Wiz: He channels this strength through his claws, teeth, tail - Boomstick: AND EPIC GRAVITY-DEFYING DROPKICKS! The screen changed to reveal Godzilla running forward… and suddenly started sliding across the terrain on the tip of his tail! Completely defying gravity as he drop kicked his opponent. “WHAT? That's physically impossible,” shouted Twilight and Starlight. “Who cares? Epic drop kicks for the win,” countered Rainbow with Sonata and Pinkie Pie nodding in agreement. Background Height: 108 m / 355 ft Weight: 81,600,000 kg / 90,000 tons Japanese name: Gojira Age: Over 65 million years Feeds on nuclear radiation Nuclear powered heart Accidentally mutated by nukes Somehow has knowledge in judo & boxing (*Cues: Godzilla vs Kumonga/Kamacuras - Godzilla Final Wars*) Wiz: Hilarious abilities aside, Godzilla would not be such a legendary kaiju without some serious firepower. He can emit atomic energy from his body for a short-range nuclear pulse. “That could be handy in certain situations,” Applejack said, whistling after seeing the powerful shockwave. “And with his big size, he could probably hit a bunch of monsters all at once,” added in Starlight. Adagio stated before smirking deviously. “Or rather, a bunch of US at once…” “Adagio, NO.” Twilight groaned. Boomstick: Or fire his signature atomic breath, a goddamn laser beam of pure radiation! That's like microwaving at least a hundred balls of tinfoil! Wiz: Well, give or take a few... million... Godzilla fires the Atomic Breath directly to the army from Godzilla, Mothra and King Ghidorah: Giant Monsters All-Out Attack (2001). “SO COOL!” everyone cheered minus Fluttershy who was hiding behind her Doomguy plushy and Torch who was glaring at the screen. “Not impressed! I can do that too!” yelled the former Dragon lord. (*Cues: Godzilla! - Godzilla (2014)*) Boomstick: The atomic breath can melt, burn, or blow up just much anything, and you know it just can't smell good! I mean... that's a lot of fish! (*Cues: Bio-Wars - Godzilla*) Wiz: NO! No, no, no! That right there is Zilla, the bastardized and shamed American version that Toho literally bought the rights and completely re-branded... just to murder on-screen. Boomstick: *chuckles* Take that, America! “Well at least it spawned a decent TV show…” Pinkie mused. Wiz: And that was just the real Godzilla's standard atomic breath. Boomstick: Yep. After absorbing a giant pterodactyl's soul... oookay… Spike blinked. “I'd ask how, but I think that'd raise even more questions…” (*Cues: 1996 Godzilla - Attacks Osaka*) Boomstick: he gained the power to boost his breath to the red spiral ray... Wiz: ...an attack so deadly it only took a few blasts to obliterate the more powerful clone of himself, Space Godzilla. Boomstick(Pinkie, Spike and Sonata): What, Space Godzilla?! Wiz: Yes, Space Godzilla is a thing, moving on... Boomstick: Ohh… “What a ripoff,” grumbled Aria and Rainbow Dash. “Aww… I wanted to know more about Space Godzilla!” Sonata whined. Wiz: Godzilla's cell structure can quickly regenerate from all manner of wounds, and despite being vulnerable to man-made electricity, he possesses magnetic properties. Like a lightning rod, he can attract thunderbolts from the sky and use nature's power to enhance his own abilities... or turn himself into a giant living magnet. Boomstick: Magnets... how do they even work? Well believe it or not, that isn't the weirdest thing that Godzilla can do. If Big G needs to get somewhere quick, he bends over, charges up, and does this... (*Cues: Godzilla Goes Flying - M37T2*) Godzilla uses his atomic breath to propel himself through the air, and it's a lot sillier than it sounds and Godzilla Goes Flying Plays. Events based from Godzilla vs The Smog Monster (1971). Wiz: Well... at least Japan is... creative? Boomstick: Wait, can that even happen? “I… I don't even…” stuttered out Twilight as her brain shorted out from that silly scene. Wiz: Scaling to the present, to actually lift his body means his atomic breath must have a force of over 328 trillion psi. (*Cues: A Sign of Godzilla - Godzilla VS King Ghidorah*) Wiz:That's the equivalent of 1 TRILLION riot control fire hoses, enough to wrap around the earth 38 THOUSAND times. Boomstick: Damn! Abilities Atomic Breath Spiral Atomic Breath Nuclear Pulse Regenerator G1 Magnetic powers Sharp dorsal plates Uncanny durability Godly strength Can breathe underwater (*Cues: Godzilla's Theme - Godzilla Unleashed*) Boomstick: Godzilla has 44 known victories, largely due to his insane durability. He's fallen into a volcano, survived a black hole, and tanked a meteorite point-blank... without a scratch. “Quite an impressive feat…” Torch said in a genuine tone. “So cool,” whispered Ember with a blush. Strengths & Feats 44 wins, 9 losses (if King Kong counts), 7 ties Survived & escaped a black hole Regenerated from a beating heart Battled Rodan for over 12 hours Survived the Absolute Zero Cannon Lifted & threw Kaizer Ghidorah Matched Thor's strength Defeated 10 monsters in a row in Final Wars Wiz: But despite popular belief, Godzilla is not invincible. His regeneration takes time, his speed is lacking, and despite having two brains, one in his skull and the other where his tail meets his torso, he's pretty darn clumsy. Boomstick: Where were you on that one, Assbrain? The more immature of the group let out a few snickers at that one. Wiz: He officially lost a fight against King Kong and he's even died in four separate films. Weaknesses Sensitive to light Relatively slow Somewhat clumsy due to size Lost to King Kong & Mothra Gills are a weak spot Vulnerable to strong surges of unnatural electricity Killed by Oxygen Destroyer & MechaGodzilla 2 The screen changed to show various version of Godzilla dying: The original Godzilla being reduced to a skeleton from the Oxygen destroyer. The Heisei Godzilla being killed by MechaGodzilla 2, as well as dying from a radiation overdose/meltdown in a different film. And GMK Godzilla being reduced to nothing but a beating heart. “Yeeesh, he’s died that many times!?” gasped out Adagio. Boomstick: But Godzilla's victories definitely outweigh his failures. There's a good reason they call him the "King of the Monsters". (*Godzilla roars*) Just as the clip finished playing Ember immediately spread her wings and let out an aggressive roar of her own, the moment she stopped she realized everyone was staring at her. “What was THAT all about?” Starlight asked. “Did you just let out a... mating call?” Spike asked, blushing a little. “Oh that's hilarious!” Rainbow laughed as she fell to the floor holding her sides. “She's got it worse for him than I do for Sonic!” She continued to laugh until she realized what she'd just said. She sighed as she pulled out her book and started removing two strikes from each of her friends. “You're erasing them?” asked Applejack in surprise. “I walked into that one myself. I'm nothing if not fair.” She replied. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ After the analysis, the Dazzlings and dragons decided that Godzilla would be the one they root for. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Gamera Wiz: The year was 1965, the apex of the Space Race. Technology was advancing further and faster than ever before, but no one could've anticipated the bio-engineered marvel hidden beneath the waves. (*Cues: Gamera Guardian of the Universe - An Investigation Ship*) Wiz: Eons ago, the ancient people of Atlantis learned how to construct life and foolishly decided to play God. “Of course,” Starlight sighed. “When will people learn,” said Adagio while shaking her head. Boomstick: But instead of creating something safe like a dog or a bunny, they created giant flying laser-shooting murder birds. “.... why!?” cried out everyone. (*Cues: Gamera Guardian of the Universe - Gyaos Flies Over*) Boomstick: Surprise, surprise - they couldn't be controlled, and they turned 100% of Atlantis into ocean front property. “And once again trying to play God results in everyone getting killed.” muttered Torch. Wiz: So what was their solution to counter these giant destructive monsters? Why, ANOTHER giant destructive monster, of course! Everyone facepalmed at that. (*Cues: Gamera Guardain of the Universe - Gamera Appears; Gamera roars*) Wiz: Enter Gamera, Guardian of the Universe and Friend to All Children. Kid 1: Hurry, let's go! Kid 2: He won't harm us. Gamera doesn't hurt people. He likes us. Background Height: 80 meters / 262.5 ft Weight: 9,000,000 kg / 10,000 tons Origin: Atlantean bio-engineering Age: Up to 150 million years Feeds on fire, plasma, & mana More intelligent than most humans A skilled gymnast Known as the Guardian of the Universe & Friend to All Children Boomstick: "Friend to All Children"? That's a terrible title. How about "Gamera, the flying fire-breathing ninja turtle of doom"? Wiz: That's... actually not far off. For a 260-foot, 10-thousand ton turtle, Gamera is quite agile. Gamera spins around on a horizontal bar before flipping through the air and landing on his feet. “That’s … pretty agile for a giant Turtle,” Starlight said, amazed by Gamera. “That is one of the coolest turtles out there,” Rainbow said, pumping her hooves in the air. Boomstick: And he sticks it! Most of the group applauded, impressed with his skill while Rainbow, Pinkie, and Sonata held up scoring cards, it was a perfect 10. “Quit marvelous,” applauded Rarity as she clapped her hooves together. (*Cues: Offense & Defense - Gamera 3*) Boomstick: His arsenal includes two huge tusks, twin elbow spikes, and a fire breath so strong it can be used underwater, despite being... you know... fire! “It looks more like highly-concentrated plasma to me?” said Twilight. “cough-NERD-cough!” said Rainbow Dash while pretending to cough. Wiz: Technically, it's highly-concentrated plasma(Twilight: See!), the fourth state of matter. The hottest plasma ever created by man exceeded 3.6 million degrees Fahrenheit. That's hotter than the surface of the sun. Gamera's fireballs can burn through practically anything. Boomstick: And when he's not spitting hot fire, he fucking eats it! Wiz: It's true. A fiery four-course meal can quickly heal and re-energize him. “So he’s a dragon's worst enemy,” snarked Adagio getting a death glare from the three drgons in the room. Boomstick: Naturally, as a giant turtle monster, he can retract his limbs and head into his shell for extra defense... (spews out jet fire out of the shell) and then fire rocket jets out of the holes and freakin' fly?! WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS?! And why can't my turtle do that? Some day, Mr. Snappy. Some day… “Beat ya to it, Boomstick,” Rainbow said grinning. She already got her turtle Tank to fly with a propeller on it’s back. (*Cues: Offense & Defense - Gamera 3*) Wiz: Gamera can fly at speeds reaching Mach 3, over 22 hundred miles per hour. That's faster than the world record-holding SR71 blackbird. “Whooo boy that's a fast turtle!” said Applejack impressed. (*Cues: Gamera 2 - Demolition Plans*) Boomstick: But how the hell does he know where he's going, and more importantly, how does he not puke his guts out? “Maybe he’s psychic?” Spike asked while shrugging. “Doubtful. It’s more likely he can sense heat or even sense objects,” Twilight said. Wiz: The Atlanteans built Gamera using mana, an ethereal energy force connecting all things, places, and people. Everything has a finite pool of mana, which can be measured using a... Sega Dreamcast. Boomstick: *sighs* But it still can't play DVD's. Wiz: A person's mana is dependent on how much influence and authority they possess over others. As Gamera literally holds the world's fate in his claws, his mana levels are off the charts. “I wonder what Twi’s and the other princess mana levels are,” wondered Pinkie Pie. (*Cues: Gamera 2 - Appearance of Soutai*) Boomstick: Gamera can manipulate his mana in combat, which is useful when you've lost your arm and need to give your enemy a kaiju-sized falcon punch. Gamera uses the Vanishing Plasma Fist to defeat Irys. Boomstick/Rainbow Dash: Fuck yeah! Wiz: And if Gamera ever runs low on mana, he can summon more from the earth itself. Gamera uses the Ultimate Plasma Mana Cannon to defeat Legion. Boomstick: ...I think he got him. “No duh,” Pinkie said. “It’s kinda hard to miss with that,” Aria said, trying to get Sonata away from her. Abilities Fire Breath Plasma Fireballs Accelerated healing Mana manipulation Flight Top speed: Mach 3 Vanishing Plasma Fist Ultimate Plasma Mana Cannon (*Cues: Gamera Guardian of the Universe - Gamera in Danger at Mt. Fuji*) Boomstick: Gamera is fast enough to catch a missile going Mach 10, capable of flying through outer space, and tough enough to survive a nuclear explosion which leveled the entire city of Sendai. Wiz: As Sendai is about 152 miles across, this explosion must have yielded nearly 112 megatons of force. “Hey didn't Sunset say that thing she had-mmhp!” Sonata was saying before her mouth was covered by Aria who was giving her a glare that said she better shut up. “Ignore her, she says stupid stuff sometimes we think she eats way too much crayons and glue when we're not looking,” said Adagio getting a pout from sonata. “Ok this is getting way too personal,” muttered the blue siren. Boomstick: Gamera has a fierce will to fight. No matter how much pain he's in, he'll keep pushing forward for the win. “Like a champ!” yelled Rainbow Dash with a grin. Wiz: And he's not just determined; he's actually quite brilliant. He tactically seeks to exploit enemy weaknesses and is apparently smart enough to repair an alien spacecraft. “Huh?” said Sonata and Pinkie Pie. Boomstick/Twilight: He does machines. “OH!” they said in understanding, Strengths & Feats 16 wins, 3 losses, 2 ties Famous steadfast determination Plasma fire trumps the Tsar Bomb Can jump hundreds of feet high Survived a city-leveling explosion Blew up a Star Destroyer [No joke] Survived an orbital re-entry with crash landing Repaired an alien spacecraft... wtf? Wiz: But despite his intelligence, he is not infallible. Gamera's supposedly impenetrable defenses have been pierced before. And remember, Gamera is explicitly the Guardian of Earth, which does not necessarily include humanity. In fact, Gamera fears mankind may one day become the earth's greatest enemy. “That’s dark,” Applejack said. “But very true,” Twilight and the Dazzlings said. “They have many dangerous weapons that could destroy themselves with.” Weaknesses Underside of the shell is weaker than its top Relies on human connection to maintain power Prefers a winning through retreating strategy Puts the Earth's safety above his own Vulnerable to his own plasma Boomstick: I knew he sounded too good to be true. He's a hippie turtle... Wiz: And yet Gamera has a strange fondness for children. Boomstick: Umm... “Don’t you dare!” yelled Rarity already knowing boomstick was going to do something to raise her blood pressure even more. (*Cues: Gamera - 1969 Theme (Instrumental)*) Boomstick (singing): Gamera! Gamera! He will bring kids to his van! Touch them like no other can! Please don't tell on Gamera! Boomstick: (speaking) No, really… Rarity slammed her head against the wall in irritation while the Dazzlings burst out laughing. Wiz: Actually... he's sacrificed his life to save children on multiple occasions. Even used his ultimate self-destruct move all for the safety of innocent children. Boomstick: Oh. That's pretty cool. “That’s not just cool. That’s a hero right there,” Rainbow said with a few nods from her friends. (*Gamera roars*) ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ With the episode paused, everyone was thinking of who to vote for. Godzilla was a powerful beast with many victories under his belt but Gamera was a smart and strategic being who fights with his head. In the end the ponies decided to root for Gamera as the dragons and Dazzlings supported Godzilla. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Wiz: Alright, the combatants are set. Let's end this debate once and for all. Boomstick: It's time for a Death Battle! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Death Battle (*Cues: GMK - The God of Destruction Appears*) Nearby a large city, Godzilla emerges from the water and roars. Tanks quickly mobilize and as Godzilla approaches the city, fire upon him. Godzilla then stomps on the ground, taking them out instantly, and proceeds to destroy a building and knock away a missile. He roars again when Gamera flies past him, then lands on the ground. The two trade roars. “SUPER GIANT MONSTER FIGHT!! YEAH!!!!” Pinkie, Rainbow and Sonata yelled as Ember said the same thing but softer. FIGHT! (*Cues: Gamera Guardian of the Universe - Air Battle*) Godzilla begins to approach Gamera, who picks up and throws a small building at him. Godzilla is unfazed and continues as Gamera unleashes his fire breath. Afterward, he proceeds to swing both of his hands at Godzilla and strikes him with his head. Godzilla then grabs onto Gamera and slams him into a building twice, the first push damaging it and the second knocking it over. Godzilla then grapple and tosses Gamera over him, knocking him into another small building on his stomach. Godzilla backs up and fires his atomic breath upon Gamera, then fires upon more of the city, turning it into a flaming wreck. “That poor city,” Fluttershy said. “I doubt they have anything to fix that up anytime soon,” Applejack said while shaking her head. (*Cues: Gamera vs Gyaos - Gamera Guardian of the Universe*) The fire then dissipates, as Gamera absorbs it. He fires off three fireballs, all of which strike Godzilla. Godzilla then strikes the ground with his tail twice, then proceeds to do his jump kick, with his tail dragging across the ground. Gamera backs up to no avail as Godzilla lands it and then lands on him, slamming his back into the ground. Godzilla roars and then prepares to stomp when Gamera retracts his head into his shell. Godzilla strikes the ground with his foot, then turns his head in confusion at what happened. He backs up when Gamera's shell begins spinning and then flies into the air. Godzilla roars, then is struck from behind by the spinning shell. “Yeah. Hit and run tactics,” Rainbow said, punching the air. “Keep it up Gamera.” “Don’t let that walking…. Flying soup bowl beat you, Godzilla,” Torch yelled from Ember’s arms. Rain begins to pour and thunder strikes as Godzilla roars once again and fires his beam multiple times at his flying opponent to no avail. Gamera flies toward Godzilla, who catches him, then flies backward out of his grip. He flies toward Godzilla again, who once again catches him, but this time fires jets from his back holes and grips Godzilla with his hands. Godzilla is lifted off of the ground, grabbing onto the shell, as the two begin flying into the air. The two roar, then Godzilla begins firing atomic breath multiple times to no avail. The two eventually reach space, with Godzilla floating helplessly as Gamera circles around him. He grabs onto Godzilla's sides from his back and then flies downward towards Earth. The two breach the atmosphere and are back in the rainy skies. Godzilla's back spikes begin attracting lightning and he uses that power to create a nuclear pulse, knocking Gamera off of him. Gamera falls towards the water below, slowing his fall drastically by spinning in his shell, before going into the water. Godzilla then uses his atomic breath to slow down his fall before crashing into the water. “C’mon. You can do this,” Ember said as she hugged her tiny father. “Too tight!” Torch squicked out. (*Cues: Baragon's Theme - Godzilla Unleashed*) Both emerge from the water roaring, then grab each other by their hands. Gamera strikes Godzilla with his head, but Godzilla responds by biting Gamera's left hand. He tears it off with little effort, with Gamera reeling backward in pain, as Godzilla spits it out. Gamera then absorbs the planet's mana as Godzilla prepares to fire his atomic breath. Gamera then opens his chest to fire his ultimate plasma mana cannon, which hits Godzilla before he can use his own blast. The blast is so devastating that it goes through a bridge, destroying the whole thing. Godzilla then roars as he is enveloped in it. “Yeah, Gamera. Show that lizard who’s boss,” Rainbow cheered as Pinkie waved around some pompoms. “He’s using the planet’s mana so he should win,” Twilight said, trying to calculate Godzilla’s chance of survival. Gamera then stands in the water, his green blood pouring out of the socket, where his left arm once was. He overlooks the destroyed bridge and roars. “Godzilla no…” whimpered Ember while Spike and Sonata gave her a small pat to her shoulders. “He did it,” Fluttershy said, hugging Doomguy Plushie. (*Cues: Gamera vs Gyaos - Gamera Guardian of the Universe*) However, Godzilla emerges from the water behind him only much bigger, “By the old Dragons,” muttered Torch now fully intimidated by the King of Monsters. “Uh-oh,” the poies said when they saw his immense size. bleeding after surviving the attack. He roars as lightning strikes again, Gamera looks back, then Godzilla grabs onto Gamera. Gamera retreats into his shell and tries to use his Fireball Ejection Suicide as one last attempt to kill Godzilla, but Godzilla throws him straight into the air over him. His spikes then turn red as he fires his red spiral ray, which strikes Gamera's shell's back. The beam eventually pierces the shell and Gamera is then obliterated, with a few pieces of his shell scattering into the water below, Godzilla roars. KO! Godzilla roars as whatever is left of Gamera is now deep in the water and out of sight. “There goes Tokyo, go-go Godzilla!” Pinkie and Spike sang. “NOOO GAMERA!” cried Rainbow Dash. Results (*Cues: Godzilla! - Godzilla (2014)*) Boomstick: Add "Master of the Culinary Arts" to his title, 'cuz Godzilla just made turtle soup! “FUCK YOU BOOMSTICK!!” Rainbow fumed. Wiz: Gamera may have held the speed advantage, but Godzilla's sheer size and power won this bout. “No kidding,” Sonata and Spike said, as Sonata hugged Spike. “Godzilla is a beast, there’s no doubt about that,” Adagio said huskily as she wanted to see more of him. Boomstick: He's nine times heavier! Plus, while Gamera tanked a city-busting nuke and almost died, Godzilla tanked a similar explosion from a meteorite and didn't even flinch. Wiz: Gamera's shell was once pierced by Viras, a physically weaker foe. There's no doubt Godzilla could overpower this giant turtle. “When he puts it that way,” Rarity began to say. “Gamera was bound to lose,” Rainbow said hollowly. Boomstick: Hell, he's strong enough to match goddamn Thor, and since Godzilla's atomic breath is composed of pure radiation, not fire, Gamera could not feed off of it. Wiz: But most importantly, Gamera has a history of winning through retreating. He usually takes one round to analyze his foe and another to win the day. On paper, this sounds like a smart idea. “Which it is!” Twilight quickly agreed. Boomstick: But unfortunately for Gamera, Godzilla don't play like that. Looks like Godzilla put Gamera through living... "shell". “Uge…” muttered Torch. Wiz: The winner is Godzilla. The dragons of the group all gave a victory roar. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Boomstick: Next time on Death Battle. we soon hear heroic theme music as we are shown a man wearing a blue and white attire with a shield and he has a patriotic feel to him. However his opponent instantly surprises everyone as they saw a shadowy figure with two pointy ears and with the symbol of a bat on his chest. then large words of who it is appeared on screen. THE KNIGHT RETURNS “…… AWESOME!” cheered the main group who knew all too well who one of the fighters will be for the next fight. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ With that said and done, the ponies pouted as the dragons and former sirens cheered. “That’s why you don’t mess with a king of monsters. That over sized turtle didn’t even stand a chance,” Torch said from his daughter’s arms. “Of course, Little Match Stick. Gamera was weaker and smaller than him. Hell, I believe you could off beaten that turtle,” Aria said causing Torch to puff up his chest a bit. “Gamera should have won. He could fly,” Rainbow said, pouting with her arms crossed. “He just wasn’t powerful enough, Rainbow and flying isn’t everything,” Adagio said with a smirk. Rainbow just flew with her friends to the usual place they go after every episode. “Enough talk. We need to get our stuff,” Sonata said, walking towards the glowing box. “What stuff did that nitwit mean?” Torch asked while looking at Ember. “This box that they’re crowding around gives us some stuff. It’s how I got this ninja outfit and book,” Ember said, pointing to her outfit. “The things that we get seem to fit the theme of the episode so I’m interested to see what we get.” “This might be a bit worthwhile then,” Torch said to himself as Ember walked towards the box and stopped in front of it. Once the glowing stopped, Twilight used her magic to open the box and look inside of it. “So what did we get? Tell us.” Pinkie and Sonata said at the same time. They were literally shaking in excitement. “Just some shirts, comics and some action figures,” Twilight said, giving everyone a few things. “This is pretty cool,” Rainbow said, already reading a Gamera comic. “I think Applebloom might like these if she wants to play with something besides her pokemon,” Applejack said with Rarity agreeing. They put the godzilla figure away for the moment as Pinkie was already playing with hers. “Well with these slim pickings, I wonder when that ball of hot air will get us,” Aria said, as she stood their with her stuff on the ground. Suddenly a portal opens up in the middle of the room and what came out was Deadman riding what appeared to be a cross between Spyro and a night fury. (There you got your cameo!!!!) “Hiyaaa! Steed hiyaaa!” yelled Deadman as he cracked a whip onto the creature. “THIS ISN’T WHAT I MEANT BY A CAMEO,” the creature said in a loud voice. “Hush steed! Daddys talking,” said Deadman yanking the reins to silence the poor cameo star. “Yes sir,” the creature said with it’s head down. It stayed still as Deadman got off of it. “Hey, you. The fireball. Are you the one who did this to me? Then change me back,” Torched said, flapping his wings and getting in the god’s face. “If it wouldn’t be too much trouble,” Embe said quickly. “Hmmmm fine.” Deadman said as he grabbed the former dragon lord with his gloved hands, chanted a few words and then threw Torch out the window where he landed in the middle of ponyville much to the shock of the group. “Father!” Ember yelled, flying towards the window and looking out of it. The other ponies look at the chaos good in shock of his actions. “Why?” Starlight asked hollowly. “Yeah, why would you do it?” Pinkie said with a small cry. “What? Did you want him to grow to full size in your castle?” asked the chaos god. “Well when you put it that way-Wait what? He’s gonna grow in the middle of town,” Twilight said panicking. “Are you crazy?” “Have you met me?” Deadman asked the friendship princess. “He’s got you there,” Starlight said, getting a glare in return. “Maybe it won’t be so bad,” Fluttershy muttered as everyone grew a bit concerned. Suddenly there was a flash of light and everyone looked outside when they saw Ex-Dragon Lord Torch at his regular size, which towered most of the buildings. He then leaned his head back and let loose a loud roar as he stomped on the ground. “RUN IT'S GODZILLA!!!” screamed a panicking earth pony wearing a suit while pointing at Torch. A unicorn wearing the same suit and a pair of glasses also pointed up and said. “It looks like Godzilla , but due to Interdimensional Copyright Laws it's not.” explained the unicorn. “STILL WE SHOULD RUN LIKE IT IS GODZILLA!” screamed the earth pony. “Though it isn't.” the unicorn quickly added in, giving the readers a cheeky grin right before the two screamed and ran off. “Oh my Diamonds. We need to do something,” Rarity sad, feeling helpless at the fact she can’t do anything. “Don’t worry girls. I’m sure Deadman will ….. Where’s Deadman?” Twilight asked as she could any sign of the god or even the sirens for that matter. (MEANWHILE with deadman and the sirens.) “We’re taking this baby to interdimensional Vegas! WHOOOOO!!!” cheered Deadman along with the sirens as they rode the poor Cameo through another Portal. (Back with Twilight and the others.) “.... sigh I’ll go get the riot gear,” muttered Twilight as she prepared to go calm the ponies of ponyville… again. Fuck being a princess sometimes. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ CHAPTER END NEXT BATMAN VS CAPTAIN AMERICA! Batman VS Captain AmericaIt was a new day, what with the ponies and dragon sitting in the room. They waited patiently for Twilight to start the episode as they tried to hold back their excitement but who could blame them. They were about to see the dark knight fight in another death battle. “Alright girls. Are you ready for the next episode?” Twilight asked her friends. “You bet, Twilight,” Rainbow said with glee. “I want to see if batman can win this time.” “We’ll have to see who his opponent is. He looks like more of a defensive fella,” Applejack said, taking a bite out of an apple. “Well what’re we waiting for? Let’s start it,” Pinkie said as the others nodded their heads in agreement. Twilight was just about to start when a knock came from the front door. She looked at all her her friends and did a mental headcount. It turned out that all her friends were there. “Did any of you invite anypony?” Twilight asked, getting shakes of the head as an answer. “I'll be right back,” she said, walking towards the door and opened it. She was surprised to see her older brother, Shining Armor, and her fellow princess, Luna, at the door with saddlebags. “Hey Twily,” Shining said, shocking the purple alicorn. “Shining? Luna? What're you two doing here?” Twilight asked as she gave Shining a hug. Once she let go of her brother, Twilight then let the two inside. “We came to see another of these Death Battles, young Twilight. We were interested in this Dark Knight character,” Luna said in an authorized tone. “Wait, how did you know about the episode Luna. We didn’t tell anypony about it,” Twilight said, sounding confused. “We saw you and your friend’s dreams from the previous night. When peering into the dreams, i saw memories and grew interested with this coming battle,” Luna said dramatically. “Makes sense,” Twilight said, turning to her brother. Behind her back, Luna let out a sigh since she was able to tell a little white lie. “What about you, Shining?” Twilight asked her brother. “I was just delivering a few files to Celestia. I got there a bit too early and decided to swing by. It was just pure luck that Luna saw me and suggested we travel together,” Shining said as they entered the viewing room. “Hey girls and Spike.” “Hey Shining,” the girls and Spike said at the same time. “Greetings,” Luna said loudly. “Hey Princess Luna,” everyone said to the lunar princess. Twilight sat down as her guests took their own seats. Looking around, Twilight asked, “Now are you all ready for this episode?” Everyone nodded as Twilight pressed play, starting the episode. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Interlude (*Cues: Invader - Jim Johnston*) Wiz: Defending the weak from powerful agents of evil demands a champion who has achieved the peak of human capability, All in the name of Justice... and sometimes Vengeance. “Hmmm i wonder if i should go back to practicing my karate?” wondered Rainbow Dash. Feeling that she was getting rusty and that it could come in handy if she and her friends got into another scuffle with some bad guys. Boomstick: Batman, The Dark Knight. “WOOO!” cheered the main group much to Shining’s amusement, and no one notice Luna sporting a small blush as she stared at the caped crusader. Wiz: And Captain America, The Sentinel of Liberty. Shining Armor had a small smile when he saw the american hero, “I’m gonna like this guy.” Boomstick: He's Wiz and I'm Boomstick. Wiz: And it's our job to analyze their weapons, armor, and skills to find out who would win... a Death Battle. Batman (*Cues: Batman Begins - Molossus*) Wiz: Throughout the underworld of Gotham City, one name strikes fear in the cold, black hearts of even the most hardened Criminals. The Batman. Boomstick: But becoming a six-foot flying Rat of Vengeance comes at a cost, for 8 year old Bruce Wayne, it was helplessly watching as his parents were gunned down in front of him on the way back from the Theatre. The group bowed their heads as they gave a small moment of silence for the hero’s parents. Boomstick: That poor kid... that Opera really must have scarred him. “THAT IS NOT SOMETHING TO JEST ABOUT BOOMSTICK!” yelled an enraged Luna causing the rest of the group to nearly lose their hearing. Background Age: 41 Height: 6'2' / 1.9 meters Weight: 210 lbs / 95.3 kg Secret Identity: Bruce Wayne Net Worth: $6.9 billion Perfected every martial art known to man Has had 23 girlfriends. Kissed at least 60 women. (luna frowned at that one.) Wiz: Bruce's Genius Level Intellect and Physical Prowess allowed him to pick up a vast array of skills on his global journey to become The Dark Knight, He became an expert in the art of Disguise and a master of every fighting style known to man, He's perfected Escape Artistry, Sword Fighting, Detective Skills, Stealth, Has a photographic memory, Earned 12 Masters Degrees, An expert marksman and is vastly knowledgeable in Pressure Points. “It still never ceases to amaze me that a normal man can be so strong,” said Twilight in awe. While it amazed her how far humans have gone without magic it’s people like batman who have her respect them just as much as she respects Celestia. Boomstick: And we're positive he's not Superhuman. “Tell me about it,” muttered Starlight, still having a hard time someone without magic could be so strong. Wiz: Officially no he's not, but he has learned to appear so in the minds of his opponents. “haza!! That's the way to do it!” cheered Luna. “make your opponent think you're invincible and they will truly fear you!” “She seems to speak from experience,” joked Fluttershy quietly. Getting a few laughs from the rest of the group even the Doomguy doll had it’s arms up in approval of her joke. (*Cues: Main Title - Batman: The Animated Series*) Wiz: Having been trained by The League of Assassins, Batman's greatest weapon is Fear. This caused Luna to go into a bout of laughter as she thought on her early days as a princess, scaring any would be conqueror by just glaring at them. “Annnnd we lost her,” muttered Rainbow Dash as she stared at the night princess from a safe distance. Boomstick: All it takes is a glimpse of that pointy-eared Shadow and criminals start shaking in their boots, He can disappear and reappear in an instant thanks to his mastery of Stealth and the high-tech gadgets he keeps in his Utility Belt, like his Batclaw Grappling Hook (Spike:GRAPPLING HOOK!), Smoke Pellets, Tons of different Batarangs and... Shock Gloves. Utility Belt Batclaw Smoke Pellets Various Batarangs Explosive Gel Disruptor Shock Gloves Cryptographic Sequencer Forensic Analysis Kit First Aid Kit Wiz: Hey, Don't underestimate the Shock Gloves, they release a charge powerful enough to penetrate Kevlar, and even stop the heart of one of Batman's most powerful enemies, Bane. “Batty takes his joy buzzers real seriously,” Pinkie Pie said, impressed by the shock gloves. Boomstick: But then he restarted it because he's nice like that, Bane later said "Thank You" the only way he knew how. (Shows the picture of Bane breaking Batman's back) “YIKES!” Starlight shouted as everyone winced at the sight. “That's gotta hurt!” “My back hurts just watching that!” Rainbow added as Fluttershy hugged her for support. “THOU UNGRATEFUL WHELP!!” Luna snapped in rage, her Royal Canterlot Voice echoing throughout the castle. “HE SAVES YOUR LIFE AND YOU REPAY HIM BY BREAKING HIS BACK?! HIS MERCY IS WASTED ON YOU!!” Boomstick: I'm surprised Batty didn't pull something out of the Utility Belt to stop that one, considering it seems to contain anything Batman could ever need, even Shark Repellent. “.... what?” asked Twilight and Shining as the two siblings tried to process what they just heard. Wiz: Actually, that's a common misconception, the Shark Repellent was stored in the helicopter that Robin was flying, NOT Batman's Utility Belt. Boomstick (and Rainbow): Oh yeah, because that makes it SOOO much less ridiculous. Wiz: Batman also carries Explosive Gel. A cluster of this substance can be sprayed onto nearly any surface and remotely detonate, perfect for distractions. Boomstick: Or you know... BLOWING SHIT UP! Tempered Criminals, if you know Batman's after you, Avoid anything shaped like a Bat. “No duh,” muttered Spike. The scene changed to show a man walking into a dark room. Man 1: Somebody in here? He then spotted Batman standing in the room…. who stared at the man with a stoic scowl. The man stared at him for a few seconds…. and then left the room while closing the door just as his partner caught up with him. Man 2: Something wrong? Man 1: ….Nnnnope. “Smart move.” Rainbow smirked as everyone chuckled. (*Cues: The Dark Knight Triumphant/ End titles - Batman: The Dark Knight Returns*) Wiz: Bruce chose the guise of a Bat to project his own fear of the flying mammal onto his enemies. However, that is not the Batsuit's only purpose. Boomstick: Thanks to some Military-Grade Armor he stole from his own company with Morgan Freeman's permission, The Batsuit is almost completely Bulletproof, Knifeproof, Electricityproof, Punchproof, Dogproof and Theftproof. “That suit still impresses me to no end,” said Rarity as she imagine designing a suit that was both fabulous and functional. Batsuit Repurposed Nomex survival suit Almost totally bulletproof Flame and shock resistant Cape doubles as a glider Cowl's para-aramid fibers lessen impacts to the head Gauntlets armed with blades Conceals both heartbeat and heat signature Night Vision/Infra-red Lens Triangulation Imaging System Wiz: Inside Batman's Cowl is an array of High-Tech Gear commonly used for listening to Police Scanners and Communicating with Allies, but in combat, Batman finds more use in it's Night, Infrared and Ultraviolet Vision, also it's built in Triangulation Imaging System, which hacks into the world's cellphones and creates a Digital 3D Map. “That kinda feels like an invasion of privacy...” Shining said, Boomstick: You mean he can see EVERYTHING I do, just because I have a phone? Wiz: More or Less. Boomstick: Ask him where I left my keys… Everyone burst out laughing at that. (*Cues: Unknown Theme*) Wiz: Aside from Mass Invasion of Privacy, Batman's resume includes such accomplishments as dodging Darkseid's virtually unavoidable Omega Beams. “HE DODGED THE OMEGA BEAMS?!” screamed Pinkie Pie. Feats Avoided unavoidable Omega Beams Survived outer space for 24 seconds Bench press: 1,000 lbs Leg press: 2,500 lbs Can throw a batarang 100 mph Swapped a poison drink faster than the literal blink of an eye Broke into Area 51... and Area 52 Wiz: Withstanding the Vacuum of Space for 24 seconds and breaking free from a coffin, buried 6 feet underground, in a straitjacket after being deprived of sleep for days all while having a cocktail of unknown drugs in his system along with The Joker's latest Venom Toxin. Everyone had the jaws wide open at the crazy achievement for the dark knight. It seemed either impossible or even like the most bullshit thing they ever heard. Boomstick: WHAT THE FUCK?! ARE WE POSITIVE THAT WE'RE POSITIVE HE'S NOT SUPERHUMAN?! “I KNOW RIGHT!?” yelled Rainbow Dash. Wiz: Given his line of work, I wouldn't be surprised if he stumbled into a room filled with Gamma Rays or something like that... But underneath the Batsuit he is affected by knives and bullets the same as any other mortal man, even though he usually comes out victorious, his self confidence occasionally put him in life threatening situations he can't escape without help. Boomstick: Like Bane's "Thank You Spine Durability Test" “Dick.” Spike mumbled. Wiz: But the Caped Crusader has consistently found a way to survive even the most life threatening situations. Boomstick: And Bats has no problem continuously going toe-to-toe with evil in the name of Justice... Vengeance. Batman: From this moment on, none of you are safe... ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Again Batman had impressed everyone, especially a certain Princess of the Night who found herself even more entranced by the caped avenger. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Captain America (*Cues: Captain America: The First Avenger - Captain America*) Wiz: Born to poor Irish immigrants in Manhattan on July 4th, 1920, Steve Rogers grew up with little money, few friends... Boomstick: And even fewer Muscles, Good God is that Steve Rogers or Jack Skellington?! Somebody get that kid a sandwich! “Sweet Celestia he's skinny,” Rarity said in shock. While she's all for being thin and in shape, there's a point where the fashionista won’t deny herself food. “He needs a sandwich, salad and anything else he can eat,” Fluttershy said, horrified at such a person looking like that. Background Before transformation Height: 5'4" / 1.6 m Weight: 95 lbs / 43.1 kg After transformation Height: 6'2" / 1.9 m Weight: 220 lbs / 99.8 kg Both parents died early in his life Won the gold medal in an art contest as a teenager Was once mutated into "Spider-King" Secretly a habitual car thief Wiz: But his sheer willpower, selflessness and desire for justice stood out, As those around him left to serve in the Second World War, Rogers was desperate to fight for his country, but due to his lacking physique and health problems, he was turned away from every single Military Organization multiple times. The group gave the young Rogers a sad look while Twilight said. “It’s sad to see someone with such devotion to protect his country get turned away like that.” Shining gave a sad nod in agreement. “It kills me to turn away young recruits who want to protect equestria because of the reasons Steve’s military did.” Boomstick: Meanwhile Hitler was creating a new group of Super Nazis with Lasers, called HYDRA. (*Cues: Captain America: The First Avenger - Training the Supersoldier*) The screen changed to show the symbol of Hydra: A skull with octopus tentacles. “Wow, subtle.” Shining remarked sarcastically. “I’m not sure, but I think they might be evil, I’m like… 65% sure they’re evil...” Wiz: Desperate to combat this new threat, Uncle Sam began the top secret "Project Rebirth", it looked like Rogers would finally get his chance to be the hero after all, provided he survived an untested, unstable, unprecedented experience. “That’s… REALLY shady,” muttered Rainbow Dash. Boomstick: After an injection of some mystery juice and tanning in Vita-Rays, Rogers lived! And as a plus became a Nazi Annihilating, Terrorist Thrashing symbol of freedom.... Captain America! ' (Gunfire sounds as a Bald Eagle flies by while Confetti and Fireworks go off) Boomstick:MERICA! This shocked the group but ponies like Rainbow Dash and Pinkie Pie started to cheer at the spectacle. “Wow… that was random,” said Luna in surprise. (*Cues: Captain America's Theme - Marvel vs. Capcom 3*) Wiz: The Super Soldier Serum pushed Steve's body to the absolute limit of human physical and mental potential. Boomstick: A homeless guy sold me a Super Serum once, I woke up in Denny's a week later without my wallet… "You idiot…" Rarity and Starlight muttered. Wiz: With his new body, Rogers can bench press 1100 lbs and run a mile in 73 seconds, by comparison, the bench press world record without the aid of a bench shirt is Eric Spoto's 722 lbs and the fastest mile run belongs to Hicham Guerouj of Morocco of 3 minutes 43 seconds, that makes Rogers nearly twice as strong and over three times as fast as the most physically fit human beings in the world. “Damn,” Rainbow and Applejack said, clearly impressed by Steve’s new physic. Abilities Adept in all fighting styles Master tactician Multi-lingual Proficient in all weapons, though he typically only uses his shield Expert acrobat Capable of chi manipulation Can resist all forms of mind control Proficient in driving all kinds of vehicles Bench Presses 1100ibs Runs a mile in 73 seconds Boomstick: He can even dodge gunfire at point-blank range, by in his own words "Seeing Faster". Twilight and Rainbow glared. “THAT. MAKES. NO. SENSE.” Wiz: Which is the absolutely stupidest way of saying that his brain can process images faster than a normal human. “THANK YOU,” Twilight and Rainbow said loudly. Boomstick: Putting his new abilities to good use, he's adept in every single form of hand-to-hand combat known to man, That's right! I bet you didn't know that Captain America was a Ninja. Iron Fist: Jujitsu, Kung-Fu, Krav Maga? Captain America: All of the above. “Now that's mighty impressive…” Applejack smirked. Wiz: Despite his incredible physical potential, The military initially decided Super Steve was best suited as.... (*Cues: Captain America: The First Avenger - The Star Spangled Man*) Wiz: The US Army Poster Boy. Shining scowled. “That's just insulting…” “Yeah, don’t use your super soldier. Make him an icon. That’s how you do it, you morons,” Rainbow said sarcastically, waving her hoof dismissively. Boomstick: That suit looks like it was ripped from a Patriotic Circus. Wiz: It was... Boomstick: Really? Well at least he upgraded to suits not made for a circus later on. Wiz: No they were too. "What?" said everyone with a flat tone. Boomstick: What kind of circus would make a costume with Kevlar, Nomex and Lightweight Titanium that's resistant to Water, Fire and Electric Shocks? Wiz: Some call it World War II. Boomstick: Oh... I get it. (*Cues: Captain America: The First Avenger - Captain America March*) Wiz: But the most iconic aspect of Cap's attire is his famed Shield, composed of Proto-Adamantium and a mysterious metal from Space called Vibranium, this one of a kind Shield was presented to him personally by none other than the 32nd President of the United States, Franklin Delano Roosevelt. “Wow that must be like the time Princess Celestia presented me my Capten armor,” said Shining with a look of respect for the american hero. Boomstick: And like a badass, Cap doesn't just use his shield for defending himself, he hurls that Motherfucker at just about anything that moves! “Perfect shot,” Pinkie said, holding a card with a number ten on it. Wiz: The combination of the two metals allows the shield to absorb and reflect practically all kinetic energy and thus ricochet off multiple targets with only minor loss in velocity, Captain America utilizes this in combination with his Super Soldier mind to predict and calculate the shield's trajectory so that it always ends up back in hand no matter how many targets it has struck. “I need a shield like that!” Shining smiled. “Don't you already have Link’s shield?” “Yup and it's right here,” Shining said, levitating said shield out of his saddlebag. “Never leaving home without it.” Cap's Shield 2.5 feet in diameter, weighs 12 lbs An unrepeatable combination of Proto-Adamantium and Vibranium Its Proto-Adamantium is even stronger than regular adamantium Absorbs the full blow of any impact Conducts neither electricity nor heat Highly aerodynamic Can only be damaged by tampering with its molecular bonding Boomstick: Cap's Shield can reflect anything from bullets to lasers, decapitate vampires and stop a blow from Thor's Hammer, and if you recall, Mjolnir doesn't fuck around, this giant Frisbee of freedom is so cool, even Superman wants one! “That’s one powerful shield,” Applejack said, clearly Impressed. It was even more impressive to see the shield match the thunder god’s hammer strike. “I know,” Twilight said, wondering if it could block Tirek’s blasts or not. (Peggy Carter shoots bullets at Cap's Shield) Peggy Carter: Yes, I think it works. (*Cues: Captain America: The Winter Soldier - Lemurian Star*) Wiz: But it's not unstoppable, it's been damaged and even destroyed its fair share of times over the years, but only by Cosmic or Reality warping powers. Boomstick: Luckily Mr. America doesn't rely only on his shield. Wiz: He's boxed Thor to a standstill, was deemed worthy to wield Mjolnir and has even managed to incapacitate The Hulk with his knowledge of Pressure Points. (Shows three pictures of Hulk being overwhelmed by Cap) Boomstick: WAIT, GO BACK TO THAT SECOND ONE! DID THIS GUY JUST KICK THE HULK IN THE DICK?!?! “Pffftttttt,” Spike, Rainbow and Pinkie said while holding their mouths. The others were shocked and amazed that Steve was willing to kick the crotch of a green giant that looked like a mountain of muscles. Boomstick: YOU GOT TO BE A REAL MAN TO GIVE THE GREEN GOLIATH A NUT CHECK, I MEAN THAT'S THE FASTEST WAY TO PISS OFF A DUDE AND WHO DON'T WE LIKE WHEN THEY'RE ANGRY?! “That might be a death sentence,” Applejack said quietly, the others agreeing with her besides Spike, Rainbow and Pinkie. The last three were laughing so hard that they fell off the couch and onto the floor. Boomstick: Balls of steel right there, great big eagle-shaped freedom balls of steel. “Do you really need to talk about his testacles like that,” muttered Rarity with flaming red cheeks. (*Cues: Captain America: The First Avenger - Invader's Montage*) Wiz: And to top everything off, not many Superheroes can claim to have defeated the fearsome foursome of Crack, Weed, Ice and Ms. Fix, The literal personifications of actual Street Drugs. Feats Survived being frozen in ice for 70 years Can run almost 50 mph / 80.5 kph Caught a torpedo with his bare hands Threw The Hulk off his feet Jumps 20-30 feet high Drops from airplanes at cruising altitude into water without a parachute no problem Boomstick: So you're telling me he's preaching an anti-drug message, knowing that drugs are the entire reason he became awesome?! Wiz: I guess we can add "Hypocrite" to his list of aliases. “I can think of another superhero who holds that title…” Rainbow scoffed, giving the rest of her friends a knowing glare. Applejack scowled. “Now how in the hay-” “Remember, a real hero doesn't brag…. unless she wants to gloat about herself behind her friend’s back or show up at her own PARADE.” She fired back. All of her friends, except Starlight and Luna, quickly went quiet, most either looking away or had the decency to feel embarrassed. Wiz: Despite being a physically perfect human, Captain America more or less has the same weaknesses as any other man, his patriotic uniform can only protect him so much from stabbing weapons. Boomstick: And sniper bullets, God knows he gets killed pretty good by those. AHHH WEAPONS! MY ONLY WEAKNESS! HOW DID YOU.... KNOW.... “Dude… not cool,” muttered Spike. (*Cues: Captain America: The First Avenger - Triumphant Return*) Wiz: Even in the face of Death, Captain America always stands for what the United States needs. Boomstick: AND SOMETIMES THAT'S SERVING HITLER AN AMERICAN SIZED KNUCKLE SANDWICH! “Yeah!” cheered the two sibling of the group as they saw captain America as a awesome role model. Man: Who are you supposed to be? Captain America: I'm *pant* Captain America. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Wiz: Alright, the combatants are set. Let's end this debate once and for all. Boomstick: It's time for a Death Battle! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ The group admired captain america for his strength and sense of justice. “He’s a true solder.” Shining stated with full respect. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Death Battle An alleyway is shown, and we see Captain America drop from the top of a building. The camera turns into the shadowy parts of the alley, and we see two blank eyes. These eyes belong to Batman. “The soldier vs the vigilante…” muttered Rainbow Dash as she leaned further in her seat. “GO BRUCE!” yelled luna with her royal canterlot Voice. “Show him what a soldier can do, Steve,” Shining said. (*Cues: Batman: Arkham Origins - Assassins*) Batman approaches the good Captain slowly, and takes a combat stance. Cap responds, and does the same. FIGHT! As soon as those words are shouted out, Captain America instantly throws his shield at Batman, which hits and ricochets, allowing Cap to sprint and grab the shield. “The first hit,” Shining cheered, causing Luna to frown. Cap starts pummeling Batman with punches and kicks (due to his knowledge of pressure points and his study of different martial arts), but Batman starts avoiding the attacks, and counters with a kick. “Batman’s starting to show the difference in skill and power,” Twilight said, on the edge of her seat like the others. “Yes and those skills will be him victory,” Luna said with her own cheer. Batman throws some Batarangs, but said weapons are deflected, and Cap throws his shield again. Batman dodges it and shoots his grappling hook from his grapple gun in an attempt to pull Cap towards him. But Cap catches the grappling hook with his hand and his shield bounces of a wall hitting Batman in the back of his head. “Poor poor Batty, the Cappy is really giving him a beating cause he can see faster,” Pinkie said innocently. Twilight looks at her friend, scowling, and said, “Oh don’t you start with that bullshit.” “Language,” Shining said, not taking his eyes off the screen. Cap yanks the cord, and races to get his shield. As he retrieves the shield, Batman is flying towards him (Due to the grappling hook), and rams the shield into Batman's chest,knocking him into a wall. “Ohhhh,” Luna said, wincing from Batman’s pain. She felt then felt somepony pat her back as she saw it was Rainbow Dash. “It’s not easy seeing your crush get hurt,” Rainbow said quietly. Luna didn’t say anything but continued to watch the fight. Batman activates the shock gloves, which are useless against the shield. Cap pushes Bats back, only for Bats to spread Smoke Bombs along the floor. “Yes! Use stealth to catch him off guard!” Luna said, feeling her confidence rise. Captain America: Let's finish this. Hyper...! This is followed by the smoke screens going off, with the rim of the shield in the wall, Batman seemingly gone. Then, more smoke bombs are detonated. Cap looks around confused until a Batarang flies by his head. Cap throws his shield in the distance, and waits for a second. The group leans in, waiting for what happens next. The suspense was almost killing them. Nothing happens, until he gets his shield back, covered in explosive gel. The ensuing explosion makes Captain America stumble, and become woozy. Batman leaps in, and uses his knowledge of pressure points to keep Cap at bay. “YEAAAAHHHH!!” cheered the night princess in full volume, causing nearly every window to crack. As soon as Captain America collapses, Batman grabs the Shield, and walks behind Cap. “Oh this is going to be bad…” muttered Fluttershy as she hid behind her Doomguy Plushiel. (*Cues: Batman Begins - Train Fight*) Before Cap can regain his senses, Batman knocks Cap into the sky, and uses his grappling hook to grab Cap by the neck. Cap is jerked down, and the hook wraps around a lamp post, breaking the Star Spangled Hero's neck instantly as he hangs above the street. “OOohhhhh,” Everyone winced at the snapping sound. KO! Batman throws Cap's shield at the hanging Captain America, slicing off the bottom half of his body and after that throwing a smoke pellet into the ground disappearing into the night of the city that he was fighting The First Avenger. “That’s just adding salt to the wounds,” Starlight said. “YESSSSS!! YEEESSS!!! I KNEW THE DARK KNIGHT WOULD WIN!!” Luna yelled as she waved her hooves in the air and started to dance on her tippy hooves like a certain white dog. Results (*Cues: Batman Arkham City - Main Theme*) Boomstick: I pledge allegiance to the Cap, hanging miserably from the Lightpost. “DAMMIT BOOMSTICK!” Shining groaned. Wiz: Captain America did have the endurance and power advantage, and Batman himself has admitted he COULD lose a hand-to-hand match against him, but there's a big different between COULD and WOULD. “Ya! I COULD take on a army of monsters, but doesn’t mean i’m going to try,” said Rainbow dash with a deadpan look. “I COULD eat EVERY cake in ponyville but i won’t even try something THAT crazy,” said Pinkie Pie, knowing even she couldn't pull something like that off without something bad happening. Boomstick: I COULD survive a fall out of an airplane, but I WOULDN'T bet on it, unless you're doing it Wiz, you should totally try it, 5 bucks if you make it. While most of the group laughed at boomsticks joke or in luna’s case, still doing a dance of victory. The only not doing those things was Rarity who could do nothing roll her eyes at Boomstick sense of humor. “And maybe you COULD be a decent person, give it a try I might respect you a little IF you can pull it off,” said Rarity. Shocking the rest of the group minus one Luna who was still dancing. “Oh SNAP!” gasped Pinkie Pie. Wiz: You're an idiot Boomstick. Also the fact is, Batman is more than a boxer, his stealth and disarming skills allowed him to turn the fight in his favor. “While old capt is good in a fist fight, but without his shield he loses his edge in the fight,” lectured Applejack. Boomstick: Not to mention the gadgets, just because Cap could "See Faster" doesn't mean he can see hard enough to spot Bats through a solid wall of smoke. “Still a stupid way to interpret his brain’s processing power,” said Twilight with a deadpanned look. Wiz: Batman also regularly battles and sneaks around super beings far above your average Laser Nazi. Boomstick: If he can ninja around SUPERMAN'S Super Hearing, there's no reason he can't do the same to Captain America. “Ooooh~! I wonder if Brucy is any good at surprise parties!?” asked Pinkie Pie as she jump around the room in excitement. Wiz: And of course Batman has more knowledge of Pressure Points and fighting styles, because he's mastered all of them, rather than simply being adept, helping him incapacitate and finish off the Star-Spangled Soldier. Boomstick: Captain America just couldn't hang in there. “Really dude?” asked Shining with a raised brow at Boomsticks joke. Wiz: The winner is Batman. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Boomstick: Next time on Death Battle. the group see a man pulling a book and turn to explain to another person behind him. ???: I have a guide here that show you how to live from now on. Then the wall completely opened up and everypony was shocked to see a intimidating red and black mech standing there. the group now see various scenes of the mech fighting in a war zone even one where it sliced a couple of other robots with a green energy sword. THE 6TH GUNDAM VS The ponies and one dragon then see a man wearing white armor with gold trimmings appeared as he floated down before activating his own robot, which is a white tiger that transforms into a humanoid mech. ????: Tigerzord! soon a montage of fight scenes appear on screen while also playing what seems like the armored man's theme ?:WHITE RANGER TIGER POWER! WHITE RANGER TIGER POWER! TIGER POWER NOW! THE 6TH GUNDAM VS THE 6TH RANGER ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ “Well that was interesting,” Shining said, getting up from the couch and stretching. “I thought Captain would have won.” “Unfortunately he didn’t,” Spike said, jumping on his back. “Now let’s go to the box.” Shining just chuckled and galloped to the box as the other were trying to calm Luna from her victory dance. “Luna, you need to stop dancing,” Starlight said, trying to get the lunar princess to stop. “HA. I KNEW THE DARK KNIGHT WOULD TRIUMPH OVER THE LIBERTY SENTINEL,” Luna loudly said, still doing the snoopy dance in celebration. There was nothing that could stop her from dancing to this happy moment. “If you don’t stop dancing then you might miss out on getting something from the box,” Fluttershy said, just quietly enough for everypony to hear. “You’re right. We must get to the box post haste,” Luna said, pointing at the box across the room. Realizing her blunder, the night princess coughed and calmly said, “Let us see what we got.” “Yeah I’m hoping for something awesome this time,” Rainbow said, flying towards the box with Applejack in tow. “We might as well follow,” Rarity said as the rest of the ponies walked to the box. It didn’t take them long to reach the box as Spike opened it and peered inside. The young dragon reached inside and pulled out a bunch of Batman and Captain America comics. “Alright,” Spike said, handing out the comics. “That’s good and all but is there anything else?” Rainbow asked impatiently. That response earned her a smack to the back of her head and a glare from her fashionista friend. Clearing her throat, Rainbow asked, “I mean is it possible that there’s another thing inside?” Spike looked back in the box and leaned back into it. After a moment, Spike came back out with a bunch of action figures of both combatants. “These were in there,” Spike said giving a few of the figures to everypony. “This’ll go great with my other stuff,” Pinkie said, stuffing the figures in her mane. “I’m sure it will, darling. Though I might be able to use them for a few ideas,” Rarity said, scanning them. “You do that, Rares. I might just give them to Apple Bloom,” Applejack said, putting them in her saddlebags. She noticed that the princess was holding a familiar golden belt. “So you got Batman’s fancy belt, Princess?” Applejack asked curiously. “Tis true Honest Applejack. I have recieved the Dark knight’s belt. I was running low on a few things anyways,” Luna said proudly while muttering the last part. “What was that?” Applejack asked. “Nothing,” Luna said quickly. “But I’m sure we heard…,” Starlight began to say, wanting to know what the night princess said. She wouldn’t get the chance as the sound of breaking glass behind the group. The group turned and saw a lone changeling, but not just any changeling crashed through the window. It was an older changeling, one who didn’t believe in friendship and didn’t change like the rest of his brethren. “DEATH TO EQUESTRIAAAA,” the changeling yelled, holding a dagger as it descended onto the ponies. It didn’t even get within ten feet of them as a dark blue beam hit the would be assassin, knocking him out. “Oh look, a changeling assassin. Let’s get it out of here and continue this conversation never,” Luna said quickly, dragging the assassin out the door. “... o~k! Said Twilight, completely thrown off guard after that completely random moment. “Guess we have to wait for Luna,” Shining Armor said a bit depressed. “Something wrong Shining?” Twilight asked, looking at her crestfallen brother. “Oh I was just hoping to get Captain America’s shield, sis,” Shining said, levitating his Hyrulian shield in front of him. “It would have been cool to have it.” Just as he said that, the box started to glow as a small tornado came out of it. Now seeing small tornados wasn’t anything new for these ponies but it was surprising to see it suck the shield into the box as the lids closed. “What the?” Shining said confused, walking towards the box. He was just about to touch the it when it jump and made a strange rapid tinging noise. That was the time for him to back away as the box was bouncing as it made various crashing noises. After a few minutes, the box lids opened and launched a circular wrapped object back at Shining. “Uh what just happened?” Rainbow asked, not sure if she saw right. Shining didn’t answer as he began to unwrap the object. Once the cloth was removed, he saw a familiar red, white and blue shield in front of him. “Woah,” he said, surprised by this outcome. “Did you just get Captain America’s shield?” Spike said, amazed at the patriotic shield. “I guess so. Still liked the other one as well,” Shining said regretfully. Another object was launched at Shining, who caught it in his magic. Curious to what the object is, Shining unwrapped it to see what it is and gasped. Inside the cloth was a glowing sword with a red handle and guard. It had many red gems in the handle and along the center of the blade. There was even a small scroll wrapped around the blade which he removed and saw that it was a note. “This is one of Link’s most powerful swords, next to his True Master Sword. While it isn’t a shield, it can shoot laser beams from it almost every time you swing it,” Shining read out loud. “Wow! Now you have both a powerful defence AND Offence,” cheered Twilight in child like glee, already planning on asking her BBBFF if she could study his two new weapons. Shining Armor said nothing as he stared at his two new gifts before giving a small grin before swinging his sword towards the broken window, launching a magic beam through said broken window. The group watch the beam travel a good distance before dissipating into thin air. “Groovy,” said Shining with a even bigger grin on his face, causing the rest of the group to laugh at such a cheesy one liner. “Tee-hee! Well i gauss while we wait for luna i’ll go look for a spell in the library to fix the window,” said Twilight as she made her way out the door while the rest of the group got comfortable for what was definitely .going to be a long wait. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ CHAPTER END! NEXT TIME EPYON VS WHITE TIGER ZORD. Tigerzord VS Gundam Epyon“Alright now that Luna’s back with the changeling nonetheless,” Twilight said, a bit confused at the situation. “We had to keep this changeling with us until the proper authorities arrive,” Luna said regretfully. “They should be here within the hour.” “Well I guess we’ll have to deal with this for the time being,” Twilight said, using her magic to levitate the remote to her. “So are you ready for the next episode?” “You bet Twilight. Giant robot battle,” Spike said, jumping up and down on the couch. He almost fell off if it wasn’t for Shining grabbing him at the last moment before setting him back on the couch. “Calm down Spike,” Shining said, chuckling a little. “You don’t want to hurt yourself.” “Sorry but I want to see the next episode,” Spike said, smiling bashfully. “Same here squirt but there’s one thing I’m curious about,” Rainbow said, floating above the two lazily. “How to get your own robots?” Fluttershy asked, trying to be helpful. Even Doomguy Plushie looked like it was agreeing with it’s owner with a small flag in it’s hand. “Well there’s that but what I want to know is what’s an Epyon?” Rainbow asked, getting blank looks from everyone in the room. The whole room was silent for a moment until the ponies in the room heard a faint noise in the distance. “Mineminemineminemine,” they heard a voice in the far distance coming from outside the window. “Do you hear that?” Rarity asked her closest friends. “Yeah, it sounds familiar,” Applejack said, straining to hear the insane mantra coming from who knows where. “MINEMINEMINEMINEMINEMINE!” the voice was getting louder. “Now that you mention it,” Twilight said, instantly recognizing the sound. “Wait is that who I think it is?” Starlight asked, feeling uneasy “MINE!” the voice screamed before a small crimson blur burst through the same window Twilight had just fixed and slammed into the bound Changeling with enough force to launch him across the room and through the other window, to where the group could see him flying into the sunset. As the changeling traveled farther and farther away from the castle, the would be assassin caused a twinkle in the sky. Everyone was silent for the briefest of moments before Luna broke the silence and said, “Well that takes care of that.” Looking at her fellow princess, Luna asked, “Who or what is that?” “That’s Deadman. He’s the one that send us this stuff,” Twilight said, gesturing to the box and TV. “I’m just not sure why he’s here.” “Yeah, hey Deadman. Why’re you here?” Rainbow said, lounging on the couch. “I AM HERE FOR THE BATTLING OF ROBOTS!” screamed the mad god. “Gees, you don’t have to yell,” Applejack said, covering her ears while Fluttershy hides behind her mane. In her hooves, Doomguy Plushie looked as if it was glaring at the god. “And anyways aren't you a god? Why would you care about two robots fighting?” asked Starlight with a raised brow. “You fool!” bellowed Deadman with such force, Starlight's mane was blown back. “MAN,WOMEN,CHILD, OR EVEN A GOD MUST RESPECT WHEN TWO TITANS OF STEEL DO COMBAT!” declared the mad god. “YA!” cried Spike as he gave the fire god a high five. “Ok? So are we gonna have anymore unexpected guests?” Twilight asked, as if tempting fate herself. The very next moment a grey furred pegasus with a blonde mane came through the destroyed window and worried. “Oh my gosh Twilight i saw something fly out your window screaming! Is everything ok?” asked none other than Derpy Hooves. She landed in front of the group and started to look around. “Oh great. Why doesn't the universe just bring somepony else here just to prove me wrong?” Twilight asked in frustration. “Well i mean if you insist,” muttered Deadman as he prepared to teleport to fulfill her sarcastic request. The very next moment Deadman reappeared with Flash Sentry in his grasp, twitching. “Wait what? Where am I?” the pegasus yelled hysterically. “FLASHY!” screamed Derpy, fly towards the pegasus and wrapping her hooves around him. Deadman gave a quick glance towards the writers and asked, “so… how much hate and downvotes are we looking at?” (more then we can ever imagined…) “It’s so good to see you,” Derpy said, nuzzling her stallion’s head with her own. “Same here, Derpy,” Flash said, blushing up a storm while hugging the mare. “So Flashy huh?” Twilight said, grinning at the embarrassed stallion. Before Flash could say anything, a loud clapping noise was heard as everyone turned to the mad god. “Well enough of this lovey dovey stuff! Time for some robot battling!” Yelled Deadman as he used all of his godly power to!... push the play button…. What? I’m not writing him doing something super epic for something mundane, go read a ShinigamiSparda story if you want insane balls to the walls action or play a Platinum game. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Interlude (*Cues: Invader - Jim Johnston*) Wiz: Evil: It has many faces, and sometimes even a good-natured soul may become its unknowing pawn. "I can understand how that feels…." Luna muttered sadly, Twilight gently placed a hoof on her shoulder and gave her a reassuring smile. Boomstick: Oh, did you say something? I couldn't hear you over GIANT FIGHTING ROBOTS! Seriously, what's cooler than giant robots? Absolutely nothing. “Darn right!” Rainbow, Pinkie, Spike, Flash and Derpy cheered. Flash was especially excited as he’d grown up reading a lot of comics with giant robots when he was young, this was a pure nostalgia trip for him. Wiz: The White Tigerzord, the sixth Thunderzord. Boomstick: And Epyon, the sixth Gundam. "Now those are awesome names for those robots!" Rainbow cheered with glee. “Ya!” Deadman cheered along with the Blue Pegasus, the two then gave eachother a high five while laughing. Once the two stopped laughing Rainbow Dash then realised what she just did before shooting Deadman a glare. “This doesn't make us friends,” she growled at the Mad God. He's Wiz and I'm Boomstick. Wiz: And it's our job to analyze their weapons, armor, and skills to find out who would win... a Death Battle. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Tigerzord (*Cues: Power Rangers - Fight (Instrumental)*) Wiz: Behold the Thunderzords, mighty bestial vehicles with a power and a force like you've never seen before. “Until you get to later seasons and things just get crazy,” muttered Deadman. Boomstick: Unless you live in Japan, then that shit's everywhere! “He's not wrong. Speaking from experience here.” Derpy added. “You’ve been to Japony?” Starlight asked. “Yeah, I took a wrong turn at the Crystal Mountains and ended up there...” said derpy with a hint of embarrassment. “.... how?” asked Twilight. “Well i was trying to get to my kitchen for a midnight snack,” answered Derpy with an embarrassed blush. “You ended up at Japony by trying to get to the kitchen?” asked Shining just as confused as his sister. Derpy just gave everyone a shrug while also sporting a smile, “I’m not a clever mare.” Wiz: The Thunderzords are piloted by the Mighty Morphin Power Rangers, five overbearing and over-emotional humans. Boomstick: Teenagers… "That pretty much sounds like that “human” world you visited….” Applejack stated, glancing at Twilight. "Yeah, but with magic instead of giant robots." Spike smiled. Deadman hummed in thought before giving an even bigger grin that Twilight saw and gave the chaos god a stern look. “NO.” Deadman just gave her a flat look. “But…” “NO! You will not interfere with the lives of my friends in the human world,” Twilight said sternly causing said god to huff in irritation. Wiz: For over a year, these five heroes defended the Earth from the evil Rita Repulsa and her cronies. Boomstick: But when her boss, Lord Zedd, showed up and started beating some serious Ranger ass, the team knew they needed some help. The screen changed to show Lord Zedd in all his villainous glory, with his dark yet vicious appearance and his armor resembling metallic bones. “Woah. That guy’s just creepy.” Spike shivered as Fluttershy hid behind her Doomguy plushie…. Who was now holding a mini-BFG 9000 for some reason... “He’s scary…” muttered Derpy in fright but quickly perked up when Flash rubbed her back smoothly. Wiz: Thus, a giant floating head in a tube and his robot buddy set to work building a new Ranger with a new Zord. Zordon: I present to you... the White Ranger. The screen changed to show room getting brighter, suddenly the silhouette of the White Ranger floated downward to the ground. As the light died down, what stood before the team was a young man in a white armored spandex with golden bracelets on his arms and legs, a black armored chestplate with golden shoulder guards, and a helmet with marking in the shape of tiger stripes. “So… cool…” Rainbow whispered in awe. “So majestic…” Rarity sighed with stars in her eyes. White Ranger (as Tommy): Tigerzord! (*Cues: MMPR - Go Green Ranger Go! (Instrumental)*) The Tigerzord roars as the screen changed to show the Zord in it’s pure unmatched glory; a massive mech that resembled a giant cat, colored black and white with bits of red, a golden blade-shaped tail, and menacing red eyes. “THAT IS SO AWESOME!!!” Flash and Rainbow cheered as they watched the Thunder Zord rushed across the battlefield with its pilot on board. Boomstick: The White Tigerzord is a gigantic weaponized robo-kitty. While cats are clearly inferior to dogs... “Blasphemy!” Rarity snapped. “Ah have tah disagree.” Applejack retorted, earning a glare from the fashionista. Boomstick: ...I might make an exception for this one and take it home. Wiz: Well, considering after it transforms to warrior mode, the Tigerzord weighs 150 tons and stands nearly fifteen floors tall, I don't think you'll find one in a pet shop window. Background The 6th Thunderzord Height: 152 ft/46.5 m Weight: 150 tons/136 metric tons Power: 75,000 Megavolts Top Speed: 115 mph/185 km/h Pilot: Tommy Oliver Power Source: Morphing Grid (*Cues: Power Rangers - Hope for the World*) Boomstick: And it's a Transformer?! Awesome! “I want one.” Flash stated gleefully. Wiz: The White Tigerzord is powered by the, quote, "White light of goodness", as is its pilot, the heroic leader of the team, Tommy Oliver, the White Ranger. “WHOOO TOMMY MY MAN!” cheered Deadman freaking out the others of the group from the chaos gods random screaming. “Wait! You now one of the fighters?” asked Rainbow in shock. “Oh ya a lot of gods from both sides of chaos and order are fans of Tommy,” Deadman said with a matter of fact tone. This little tidbit of info surprised the group and they couldn't help but give Tommy a look of respect. Boomstick: He wasn't always in charge, though. His original powers came from the screeching, migraine-ridden she-witch Rita. Naturally, it was a trick and those powers came packaged with a curse that turned him evil. Again Luna looked down as she remembered the time the Nightmare tricked her into giving into her anger and becoming Nightmare Moon, but that train of thought was interrupted as she felt a gloved hand rest itself on her head. She looked up and saw that it was Deadman who was giving her a comforting pat on the head. Smiling, she gave the chaos god a nod before they went back to watching the show. (i'm using stuff from the MLP Comic for this.) Wiz: Luckily, Rita doesn't logic much, so the Rangers reversed the spell by destroying a completely unrelated object. Que Twilight, Shining, and Starlight face hoofing at the stupidity of one Rita Repulsa. Tommy Oliver Pilot White Mighty Morphin' Power Ranger Height: 5'11"/1.8 m Weight: 214 lbs/97 kg Weapons: Saba Length: 20 in/51 cm Sentient sabre Can fire lasers & fly independently Martial arts: Karate, Kenpo, Taekwondo, Judo, Shinkido Has had 5 different Ranger powers Boomstick: Tommy wields Saba, a talking saber that shoots lasers and remote controls the Tigerzord. “A sentient weapon?” Luna mused to herself. “That might prove useful..” (The Tigerzord trips and falls on its back, still moving its feet as if running.) White Ranger: Hey! I thought you knew what you were doing! Saba: I do! White Ranger: Yeah, you sure could've fooled me. “....until you want the thing to shut up.” Rainbow added with a chuckle. (*Cues: Unknown Theme*) Wiz: And is also... uniquely multilingual. Saba: That's right. None of you speaks bird. Take me over to the cages. Um... squawk, squawk, tweet, squawk, tweet... “He just ordered a salad.” Fluttershy blinked. Boomstick: Everyone that just watched that is now dumber. Our bad. Starlight groaned. “I felt a few of my brain cells die.” “I think i just forgot basic math,” muttered Flash rubbing his aching head but a small kiss to his forehead from Derpy made it feel a lot better. (*Cues: Power Rangers: Dino Thunder - Main Theme (Instrumental)*) Wiz: In battle, the Tigerzord's tail doubles as a golden tiger sword. Boomstick: Which can light itself on fire, I assume, by sparking a robo-fart of some sort. See, Wiz? I can science too. “No. No you can not.” Twilight scowled. Boomstick: Anyway, the Tigerzord knocks foes off their feet with sonic blasts, temporarily increases agility with hyper speed, and shoots fireballs from its... chest mouth thing. (The Tigerzord prepares to unleash a fireball.) White Ranger: White Tiger Thunderbolt! Armed and ready! It fires, which hits Nimrod. White Ranger: *laughs* (*Cues: Power Rangers - Combat (Instrumental)*) Wiz: The Tigerzord's greatest asset, however, is its ability to mimic the movements of its pilot. (*Cues: MMPR - White Ranger Tiger Power*) (The Tigerzord punches and kicks Nimrod, knocking her to the ground.) Arsenal Golden Tiger Sword White Tiger Thunderbolts Sonic roar Hyperspeed Shoulder charge Pilot mimicry (*Cues back to Combat*) Wiz: So it's important to determine how superhuman the White Ranger is, but he doesn't have many measurable feats. Fortunately, all Ranger powers are derived from the same Morphing Grid, a galaxy-spanning energy field which balances all life. Boomstick: So... the Force. “Pretty much,” Deadman said with a shrug. Wiz: Yeah, pretty much. This means all Rangers have comparable powers that we can use to measure Tommy's potential. Boomstick: The SPD Green Ranger Bridge Carson once lifted and threw a two-ton car at this poor girl, who he guessed was a demon. Luckily, he was right and a PR catastrophe was avoided. “While i’m glad he was right he still shouldn't have put what could've been an ordinary citizen's life at risk,” said Shining Sternly. Wiz: The average man can squat-lift about 125 lbs, so this feat makes Power Rangers at least 32 times stronger. “Wow,” muttered Fluttershy shyly. Saba: That was most impressive. “I agree with Saby!” giggled out Pinkie Pie. Wiz: And we know Rangers also receive a speed boost, so it's reasonable to believe that a morphed Ranger's reaction speed is in the ballpark of 32 times faster than the average person. Thus, the White Ranger can actually react to attacks in about six milliseconds. To compare, in the same given time, a bullet fired from a gun would've only traveled about nine feet. As the Tigerzord mimics the White Ranger in real-time, it must be capable of the same speeds. “That’s a lot of assumptions if you ask me,” muttered.Applejack. “There just working with what they got,” countered Rarity causing Applejack to agree with her on that. Boomstick: I bet he could totally do that knife finger stabby game. Actually, uh, Wiz, put your hand on the table. Wiz: NO! Not after last time! That poor intern... “Poor Mr intern,” muttered Derpy and Fluttershy in pity. Boomstick: I told him not to move! “Sigh…. Boomstick you idiot,” sighed a frustrated Rarity, Wiz: Anyway, like that intern, the Tigerzord can't always cut it on its own. (*Cues: MMPR - Zords (Instrumental)*) Boomstick: When that happens, Tommy's friends usually come in to save his ass, but even though they won't be able to help him today, Tommy can still call upon his secret weapon. Wiz: Each Power Ranger has his or her individual Zord, which only they can pilot. However, there have been numerous instances when a Ranger has called upon other Zords. So Tommy can call upon the Lion, Griffin, Unicorn, and Phoenix Thunderzords to create the Mega Tigerzord. Mega Tigerzord Height: 207 ft/63 m Weight: 336 tons/305 metric tons Energy Ball Energy Shield Bladed buckler Phoenix Strike (Finishing move) More powerful than the Thunder Megazord (The Tigerzord transforms into the Mega Tigerzord.) “OH MY CELESTIA/GOD IT’S SO. FUCKING. COOL!!” Flash, Rainbow, Spike, and Deadman all cheered with glee. Boomstick: The Mega Tigerzord is a massive monster of a mech. It's got an energy shield, an energy ball attack, and a wicked dropkick. Oh, and its finishing move is literally lighting a giant robo-bird on fire and shooting it through everyone in its path. Obviously, the Mega Tigerzord has never lost a match. “Oh man Twilight you and me need to come up with a combo Attack like that!” cheered Rainbow Dash as she shook her Lavender Friend around in excitement much to the amusement to the rest of the group. “(Giggle) Dashie is really adorable when she gets excited like this,” laughed Pinkie Pie. “Heh, agreed,” said Deadman. Strength & Feats Beat Nimrod when Megazord failed Defeated Cannontop singlehandedly Stronger than Thunder Megazord Survived deflected Phoenix Strike Can lift over 1500 tons Tommy beat Pursehead one-on-one Tommy defeated 4 monsters at once Tommy defeated Goldar in several duels Wiz: The Mega Tigerzord is so powerful, it's even had that finisher move reflected back at it, survived, and all it did was fall over and look surprised. “Enduring your own attack?” Rainbow mused to herself. “Either it held back or that thing's super-durable.” Boomstick: But it's not all firebirds and rainbows. Enough damage can overload the Tigerzord's connection to the Morphing Grid and annihilate it. But don't get me wrong; this is one ass-kicking, Mighty Morphin', fire-birding, flame-swording power kitty! Meow. Weaknesses Defeated by Dragonzord in one shot No backup power supply Not very agile Destroyed by Rito Revolto Tommy's stubborn honor can sometimes lead to mistakes White Ranger: Saba, are you ready, pal? Saba: White Ranger, I'm ready when you are. White Ranger: Alright! Tigerzord! Power up! (The Tigerzord roars and then turns into warrior mode.) ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ The group (minus Deadman who already new about Tommy) agreed that the Tigerzord and it’s pilot Tommy Oliver were both strong and heroic. “I shall be rooting for the mighty tigerzord and the white ranger!” declared Luna. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Gundam Epyon (*Cues: Gundam Attack - Gundam Wing*) Wiz: In the year 195 A.C., yes, A.C., Earth and its space colonies were on the brink of civil war. Chaos had erupted, governments shattered from within. The only constant were five freedom-fighting mobile suits called Gundams. The group along with Deadman had to hold back their laughter as soon as they saw Twilight gain a starry look in her eyes as soon as she laid her eyes upon the gundams. (*Cues: Gundam Wing - Just Communication (Instrumental)*) Boomstick: Piloted by a bunch of kids who have no idea how to have fun. Seriously, get laid or something. Wiz: Intrigued, the disgraced commander Treize Khushrenada set about creating his own Gundam. While most of the ponies were impressed that Treize mad his own Gundam, Shining and Flash’s eyes narrowed when they heard the Disgrace Commander Part. Boomstick: For sex? “Oh god…” muttered Rarity, already knowing where this was going. Wiz: No! For Zechs. Boomstick: This is getting really confusing. “Only you Boomstick…” Rarity Growled. Wiz: Try and keep up. Treize hoped this new non-sexual fighting machine would finally answer the meaning of life and death. Boomstick: And birth! Wiz/Rarity: NO! “You stupid inbred hick!” continued Rarity as she went on a 10 minute rant using language not suitable for this story. (Treize removes a book from the shelf.) Treize: I have a guide here that will show you how to live from now on. “I really wouldn't want any advice from this guy,” muttered Spike. (holy crap i almost forgot he was in this!) “Agreed Spike,” said Luna in agreement. (The walls split, revealing Epyon.) “YES!” cheered Deadman as soon as his eyes landed on the 6th gundam, and while his outburst annoyed most of the group they could understand his enthusiasm once they got a good look at the fearsome meck. (*Cues: Gundam Wing - Legend of Zero*) Wiz: And so, the Gundam Epyon was born. “So cool,” breathed out Flash, Twilight, Shining, Rainbow Dash, and Deadman. Heero Yuy: Do you think you've built a god or something? Treize: Maybe I do. “HAHAHAHAHA!” laughed out Deadman as the rest of the group gave Treize an odd look. “Kind of arrogant don’t you think?” asked Applejack with a raised Brow. “I mean Epyon looks cool… but a GOD?” questioned Spike. Boomstick: Epyon is a fierce force of metal and badassery. Like all Gundams, it's armored with... Gundanium. Wiz: Yet another stupidly-named fictional metal that happens to be many times stronger and lighter than titanium. “Well Wiz it is a different world so it stands to reason they would have their own metal,” lectured Twilight. Boomstick: Standing 57 feet tall and weighing just under ten tons, Epyon is actually quite a bit smaller than your average Japanese giant robot. “Wow the tigerzord towers over the Little guy,” gasped out Pinkie Pie. ‘Poor thing,” said Fluttershy in a quiet tone. Wiz: But for what it lacks in size, Epyon compensates with incredible speed. With a max propulsion of nearly 200,000 pounds, Epyon can fly over 250 miles per hour. “Whistle~ for something so big it can sure take off,” complemented Rainbow Dash. Boomstick: But manning a Gundam at that speed is rough, and can kill a pilot who hasn't been trained. The pegasi in the room gave a bod to that little tidbit even ponies like Rainbow Dash needed rigorous training to hone her body to handle the speeds she go’s at a daily bases. Background The 6th original Gundam [Wing] ID: 0S-13MS Gundam Epyon Height: 57 ft/17.4 m Weight: 9.4 tons/8.5 metric tons Max Propulsion: 194,337 lbs/88,150 kg Pilot: Zechs Merquise Armor: Gundanium alloy Powerplant: Ultracompact Fusion Reactor Wiz: Epyon's pilot is the legendary warrior and Treize's closest friend, Zechs Merquise, the Lightning Count. Commander of the OZ special forces, valedictorian of a prestigious military academy, and sole pilot of the unstable Gundam prototype. “Ok i have to admit… THIS guy is a soldier,” complemented Shining Armor. Boomstick: How does the Wizard of Oz come into this now!? Anime seriously confuses me. Well, regardless, Zechs is a true warrior. (*Cues: Gundam Wing - Treize Kushrenada/The Man Who Makes History*) Zechs: I am a true soldier. Boomstick: Oh, look, an echo. This got a few chuckles from the group. Zechs Merquise Code names: Lightning Count, Wind Age: 20 Height: 6'1"/184 cm Weight: 168 lbs/76 kg True identity: Milliardo Peacecraft Valedictorian of Lake Victoria Military Academy Ranks: 0Z Colonel, Romefeller Count, White Fang Commander in Chief Wiz: Despite this, he could not handle the politics of war. After Treize staged a coup which spiraled out of control, Zechs stumbled through the ensuing chaos like a lost pup, always ending up fighting for the wrong cause by complete accident. Whoops. This caused both Shining Armor and Flash Sentry to facehoof. Zechs: I don't understand! Why am I still so... spineless? Boomstick: Oh, I have an awesome giant Gundam that everyone needs to do awesome stuff. Poor me. Wiz: But PLOT TWIST: Zechs has been hiding a secret identity. He is, in fact, Milliardo Peacecraft, the long-lost heir to the throne of the pacifist Saint Kingdom. Yes, the Peacecrafts literally craft peace. “Seems like a noble thing for a kingdom to do,” said Luna get a nod from Twilight. Boomstick: At first, the only one who knew Zech's true identity was his slap-happy admirer, Noin. You'd think a cheerful girlfriend who doesn't have blood on her hands would help Zechs lighten up a bit. But... “Tragedy struck,” muttered Starlight. “I hope nothing happens to her,” whimpered out Derpy. Zechs: Don't go getting too attached or parting will hurt. Noin: But my soldiers aren't ever going to be killed in battle. “That's just wishful thinking…” muttered Shining Armor. Remembering how all the men he lost during the changeling invasion and when Tirek attacked Canterlot, but he was brought out of those dark thoughts when he felt his sister Twilight pull him into a hug. (A black screen says "Exactly 1 minute, 10 seconds later"... then explosions travel across the complex, killing her men, followed by Noin holding one of her men in her arms before he dies.) Most of the group had a look of pity on their faces all except Deadman who just had a apathetic look etched onto his fiery face, being a god and also being the cause of a few worlds demise throughout the millennia has made him numb to this kind of things. Boomstick: Damn...he won't be hitting that for a while. “FUCK YOU BOOMSTICK!” screeched Rarity with a yell so loud you’d think she had just learned the royal Canterlot voice. (*Cues: Plot, String and Marionette - Gundam Wing*) Wiz: Despite being a backstabbing, coup-staging terrorist, Treize Khushrenada apparently has some high sense of honor, and this is reflected in Epyon's arsenal. “At least he has some honor,” Rarity said, huffing a bit. The rest somewhat agreed but decided not to voice their opinions on Treize. Boomstick: Aside from two tiny vulcan guns, Epyon was designed as a dueling suit, and lacks effective long-range weaponry. But that's okay, 'cause check out this sword!!!! (Epyon cuts through four robots, two with each swing, separating them from the top halves before they explode.) “Woah,” Spike, Shining, Rainbow, Flash and Twilight said in stunned awe. “IT'S SOOOOOO AWESOME,” Deadman said, completely fanboying over the sword. Boomstick: The Beam Sword is connected directly to Epyon's power source, which means its size and power can be increased on the fly. Epyon also has a durable shield which houses a chain whip called the Heat Rod, that can be superheated to slice through armor. “Those are some impressive weapons,” Applejack said while whistling. Unknown to the group, Twilight was paying careful attention to the weapons while making a note to recreate them later. (*Cues: Gundam Wing - Zechs Comes*) Wiz: But its greatest and most risky weapon is its on-board computer: the EPYON system. A modified Zoning & Emotional Range Omitted System. This directly links with the pilot's brain and aids him by constantly predicting outcomes and strategies in mid-battle. And unlike other zero systems, this modified version shows Zechs's opponent's' face as he's murdering them. This shock the group (minus Deadman.) why would sompony add a feature that made sompony see the face of the person they killed!? “Meh i’ve seen worst ways to lose your mind,” Deadman Commented. Boomstick: Oh, that's right. For the nightmares. “That’s creepy,” Spike said, feeling a bit unnerved by the image of Zechs killing a soldier. Unknown to him, the rest of the ponies were also creeped out at seeing Zech’s visions. Wiz: It gets worse. The EPYON system relies on Zechs ignoring all distractions, including his own drive to win. It predicts every possible outcome of the battle at hand and shares them with him. These include the outcomes where he loses, which take the forms of hallucinations. If Zechs can't separate fact from fiction, these hallucinations may become reality. That seems like a huge gamble to me,” commented Applejack. Arsenal Beam Sword Epyon Claws Epyon Shield Heat Rod Vulcan Guns Search Eye Epyon System Modified ZERO System Predicts outcomes in mid-battle Potentially harmful to pilot Can cause hallucinations Boomstick: But despite the danger, it's totally worth getting into Epyon's pilot seat, 'cause this giant robot is a born winner. It's capable of holding four other Gundams at once, survive the heart of an exploding space station, and destroyed another giant space station with a single, awesome sword slice. Ha-haa! Gundam powers, away! “I wish i had Gundam powers…” muttered Deadman in a depressed tone. “Aren't you a god?” asked Starlight with a look of confusion directed at the chaos god. “.... I wish i had Gundam powers,” Deadman Stated. Causing Starlight to facehoof at his stupidity. Strengths & Feats Held off 4 Gundams at once Destroyed Barge Undetectable by most scanners Survived explosion of Libra station Gundanium armor is several times stronger than titanium Zechs defeated Colony 191 in under 1 minute Wiz: Of course Epyon does have its fair share of weaknesses, and even though Zechs eventually overcame his turn to the dark side, nearly sacrificing his life for the greater good in the process, he never did quite become that perfect soldier he always wanted to be. weaknesses Lost dual against Gundam Wing Zero No powerful ranged weapons Suspectible to beam cannons Physically & mentally dangerous to pilot Epyon System may cause hallucinations & loss of control Zechs' obsession over Lucrezia Noin Boomstick: But good news: he did eventually get in Noin's pants. Worth it! “Of course that's a real victory to you!” huffed a ticked Rarity. Zechs: Just watch me! I'm gonna live right to the bitter end! I'll live the hard life of a warrior! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Wiz: Alright, the combatants are set. Let's end this debate once and for all. Boomstick: It's time for a Death Battle! Robo-style! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ The group, except Deadman, were impressed with Epyon and Zech’s accomplishments. Though they hated Trieze, they felt that Zechs deserved to be called a true soldier. “Me and the captain are rooting for Epyon,” said Flash. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Death Battle In a barren, hill-covered area, the Tigerzord in warrior mode slowly walks across while the White Ranger stands atop it holding Saba, who is controlling the Zord. “What are they doing Flashy?” asked Derpy as shy took a bite of some popcorn that Deadman made her with his magic. “Looks like training to me,” answered the orange pegasus. White Ranger: Alright Saba! Time for a weekly test run! “See!” flash said with a smile. Saba: Excellent! Let's test the weapon systems! White Ranger: Just make sure the safety systems are on. Just as the White Ranger says this, a blast fires from the Tigerzord's chest as the Zord falls onto its rear. Saba: Safety systems activated. “A little too late,” Shining said, shaking his head. The blast from the Tigerzord continues flying into the distance. Saba: Um... that will... probably dissipate, right? “Why do I get a he feeling that's gonna come back to bite him?” muttered Twilight. (*Cues: To Beauty, to Elegance and to Noble-Mindedness - Gundam Wing*) Elsewhere in the same area, Zechs is standing. He lets out a breath until Noin flies in inside her mech. Noin: Zechs... what are you doing down here? Zechs: Hm... hello Noin. Just brooding over how I nearly destroyed the Earth. “Wow, emo much?” Applejack said. “Doesn’t he have anything better to do?” Spike said, looking at the others. “I guess not,” Starlight said, shrugging. Noin: That again? You've gotta lighten up, you grump. “Ya i agree with Noiny you should go out and Party!” cheered the Pink Party Pony (ppp for short). Zechs lets out another sigh. “Wow! Way to be a downer…” muttered Rainbow Dash. Noin: Well... how about we do that thing you're always asking about? You know... that thing that rhymes with your name? “Giggity,” snickered Deadman while most of the group blushed. “Oh my,” whispered Fluttershy. Zechs: What? Really? Noin: Of course. I think it's finally time. Just as Noin says this, the blast from the Tigerzord hits her mech, causing critical damage. Noin screams and then the mech explodes. Everyone, except Deadman, winced at Noin’s death. Rarity was especially sad since they seemed to have their fairy tale ending destroyed by a fireball. Zechs: Noin? NOOO!!! “Fucking cocked block big time,” muttered Deadman as he took a sip from a soda… somehow. It cuts back to the Tigerzord. Saba: ...eventually... “Or it could cause a shit storm,” snarked Rainbow Dash. White Ranger: Huh. I think I'll drive. The White Ranger jumps into the Tigerzord. Meanwhile, Zechs, amongst the fiery ruins of Noin's mech, takes out a remote control and presses it. Epyon flies in right behind him and it’s eyes glow. “I think he’s mad,” Pinkie said, everyone agreeing. The Tigerzord resumes it walk, this time with the White Ranger piloting it. Suddenly, it stops. Saba: Warning! Bogey approaching fast! 200 meters! White Ranger: *groans* Must be one of Zedd's! Saba: Zero meters! White Ranger: Huh? Epyon flies in and strikes the Tigerzord from behind, then lands to the ground. Zechs: I'LL BREAK YOUR FACE! “Forget mad, he’s fucking pissed,” Starlight said, feeling sorry for the gundam pilot. “No fury is greater than a man going through blue balls,” said Deadman sagly. All males nodded in agreement while the girls rolled their eyes. White Ranger: Is it just me or do Zedd's goons keep getting smaller and angrier? “He kinda has a reason to be angrier than bull with a toothache ,” muttered Applejack. (*Cues: Gundam Wing - When The Dragon Swims Everything Ends*) FIGHT! Zechs lets out a roar-like shout as Epyon flies towards the Tigerzord. The Tigerzord blocks the blow, but Epyon flies behind it, striking the Tigerzord from behind with its beam sword. It cuts to the inside of the Tigerzord, with Saba floating alongside the White Ranger. White Ranger: Whoa! He's quick for a little guy! “Small, angry, and and blue balling… truly a terrifying combo,” muttered Deadman. Saba: Stop messing around and start defending! White Ranger: Right! Time for action! The Tigerzord starts charging up a move as Epyon flies toward it. White Ranger: White Tiger Sonic Boom! The move is successful, as Epyon is blown backward and falls to the ground. It cuts back to the White Ranger, now holding Saba in his hand White Ranger: Alright Saba, I want the Tigerzord to follow my every move! “That's still such a cool function for a robot,” cheered Flash. He lifts Saba over his head, then does two swings. The Tigerzord replicates the two swings to defend against Epyon's beam sword, then swings the sword rapidly, keeping up with Epyon's swings, before the two swords clash. It cuts to Zechs inside of Epyon. Zechs: You may be skilled... but you're too slow for Epyon! “You’re too slow!” jeered Rainbow Dash. As he says this, Epyon flies backward. White Ranger: How's this! Hyperspeed! The Tigerzord moves forward at an incredible speed, punching the fleeing Epyon, who then crashes to the ground on its front. The Tigerzord then steps toward it. “That’s pretty fast for a giant robot,” Rainbow said, impressed by it’s speed. White Ranger: Time to stamp out some evil! The Tigerzord moves its foot downward to stomp on Epyon, but Epyon flies out of the way just in time. Epyon fires its vulcan guns at the Tigerzord while it flees, which have almost no effect. “Oh ya it’s a close corner fighter type,” muttered Shining Armor. White Ranger: Huh. What, are you playing hard-to-get? Alright then. Go long! The Tigerzord begins charging an attack. White Ranger: White Tiger Thunderbolt! Fire! The bolt fires from the Tigerzord and Epyon activates his shield. While the shield does prevent damage, the blast itself knocks Epyon back. Inside Epyon, the EPYON system beeps and a red light flashes over Zechs. Zechs: The EPYON system indicates that you've shown your full arsenal. “Not all of it,” smirked Luna. The Tigerzord charges up once again. White Ranger: Fire! This time, three bolts fire from the Tigerzord. Epyon flies toward the Tigerzord, evading all three bolts. It seems that another bolt manages to hit Epyon, but then Epyon slices at the Tigerzord's legs nearly instantly, damaging them. Epyon then flies upward towards the Tigerzord's head, ready to deliver the final blow. Zechs: You're finished. (*Cues: A Whisper Under a Smiling Moon - Gundam Wing*) Suddenly, the wasteland is shown in a sepia-tone color, as is Epyon, but with the Tigerzord nowhere in sight. Epyon stops what it's doing. “What’s going on?” Fluttershy asked, feeling confused. She didn’t understand why the environment changed colors. Zechs: What? Then a massive shadowed mech appears in the background and moves its arm upward, ready to strike. A gleam appears from the hand. "Eeep!" squeaked Fluttershy as she hid behind her Doomguy Plushie. Zechs: What's that? The mech's arm starts glowing, then its chest charges with electricity. A sound of a bird screech and a lion roar plays, then the mech unleashes its attack as Zechs screams. Then the wasteland is in color again, back to Epyon and the Tigerzord. “Must of been the Epyon system showing him a vision,” theorized Twilight. Saba: Quick Tommy! The circle on its chest! It must be a weak spot! White Ranger: Right! The Tigerzord steps back and prepares a punch. (*Cues: MMPR - White Ranger Tiger Power*) The Tigerzord’s fist moves with incredible speed, then when the Tigerzord finally hits Epyon, it has no effect. “.... waa waa~” sang Deadman before busting out into laughter while the rest of the group was looking at Tommy with a blank stare. Zechs: Hmm... don't get cocky. White Ranger: What? He didn't explode? Saba: Well, this defies all logic! “What logic?” Twilight asked, not getting what Saba meant. “Explain, Saba.” (*Cues: Gundam Wing - OZ Moblie Suits Approach*) Epyon flies away from the Tigerzord, then grips its leg with the heat rod. The Tigerzord falls over on its front, knocking the White Ranger and Saba down. White Ranger: We're grounded! Saba: Tommy! Call the Zords! The White Ranger picks up Saba. White Ranger: You got it! He holds Saba upward. White Ranger: I need Thunderzord Power! Now! “YES!” cheered Luna, feeling like her victory was insured. (*Cues: MMPR - Zords (Instrumental)*) The clouds cover the sky as lightning strikes multiple times. All four other Zords appear and then in a flash, the Tigerzord has become the Mega Tigerzord. Zechs: Oh shit. “Oh shit indeed,” Shining and Spike said in awe. “Language, Spike,” Twilight yelled. “Sorry,” Spike muttered to the lavender princess. The Mega Tigerzord charges toward Epyon, who tries to block the blow, but is knocked back. Epyon is then grabbed by the Mega Tigerzord, who places it on its feet, flips over, and lands on the ground. Epyon is knocked upward, allowing the Mega Tigerzord to punch it multiple times before knocking it upward even further with an uppercut. The Mega Tigerzord jumps after Epyon and flies above it, then kicks it back to the ground with both its feet. It then puts both of its arms up into the air, charging up an energy ball, then throws it downward. Epyon manages to regain control and avoids crashing into the ground. “Wombo-Combo!” yelled Deadman. Zechs: No, not like this! Epyon turns to face the incoming energy ball and uses the heat rod to block, which successfully stops the attack. The Mega Tigerzord puts its arm up and begins charging up an attack. Zechs then sees the shadowy mech doing the same move, and realizes that it was the move that destroyed him in his hallucination. “..... uh-oh,” muttered Luna who broke out into a cold sweat as she quickly found out what was about to happen. Zechs: Here it comes. The Mega Tigerzord unleashes a giant beam, which Epyon flies out of the way of. (*Cues: Gundam Wing - White Reflection*) "Oh what a lovely song," said Rarity as the rest of the group agreed. Zechs: Routing all power to thrusters! Epyon flies right behind the Mega Tigerzord by its head. Zechs: And now to the beam saber! Epyon takes out its beam saber and charges with energy. Zechs: For... NOOOIIIN! White Ranger: UGH! NO! Saba: SON OF A BIIIIII- “YEEESSSSSS!” cheered Deadman, Flash, and Shining Armor. “NOOOOOO!!!” cried out Luna. After a single slash from the full-powered beam saber, Epyon lands to the ground as the Mega Tigerzord reaches critical condition and overloads its connection to the Morphing Grid. The top half begins to slide off the bottom half, then it explodes as the White Ranger screams. All that remains is the Mega Tigerzord's bottom half. KO! Zordon is crying over the death of the White Ranger, the Command Center filling with tears, while Zechs is by Noin's mech crying over her death with a puddle of tears below him. “Now that's a bittersweet victory…” Starlight said sadly. Results (*Cues: Rhythm Eros - Fan Remix of Rhythm Emotion - Gundam Wing*) Boomstick(and Flash): Ow! My childhood! “He had a childhood?” Starlight asked, slightly interested. “It was probably filled with his beer and other juvenile things,” Rarity said in distaste. Wiz: This was a surprisingly close call. At first glance, The Tigerzord towers over Epyon and is fast enough to keep up with it. Yet Epyon destroyed Barge, a 26,000 foot long space fortress with one sword swing, just one! There's no doubt that a few swings like that were enough to overload Tigerzord's connection to the Morphing Grid. “One of the coolest feats we’ll ever see,” Flash said, starry eyed with everyone agreeing with him. Boomstick: I mean, this goofy-looking skeleton dude did it, so I imagine a giant laser sword wielded by a devil robot could do it too. “That does make sense,” Twilight said, remembering the giant skeleton. Wiz: Also, Zechs is a far more experienced and properly trained warrior, unlike Tommy, who was drafted in the middle of high school. But the Tigerzord wasn't helpless. Its Mega form even duped the Epyon System for a moment, but unfortunately for our favorite White Ranger, Epyon is an ever-evolving dueling machine. Boomstick: Stupid future-predicting robot, and its REALLY FUCKING SWEET SWORD! GUNDAMNIT! “HE'S SO AWESOME,” Deadman yelled, annoying the group of friends. Wiz: The winner is the Gundam Epyon. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Boomstick: Next time on Death Battle. The group sees a muscular man wearing a sleeveless white training gi and wore a red headband facing against a yellow and black clad ninja with two swords on his back and he a pair of soulless white eyes. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ “That was a good episode,” Flash said, getting off the couch with Derpy following him. “Can’t believe Epyon pulled it off though.” “I know. It was so awesome,” Rainbow said, flying towards the glowing box. “C’mon you slowpokes. I don’t want to miss this.” “Right behind ya Dash,” Applejack said, following her speedy friend. “Wait for me, Dashie,” Pinkie said, bouncing towards the box and her friends. Derpy waited everyone walk towards the box in confusion as they gathered around it. Turning to her stallionfriend, the cross eyed mare asked, “What’re they doing, Flashy?” “They’re just waiting to get some stuff from the box. C’mon,” Flash said gently as he lead her to the box. Once they reached the box, the glow died down as Twilight used her magic to open the box up and looked inside. “What’d we get this time, Twi?” Applejack asked, tilting her head to the side. Twilight looked back at her farmer friend and said, “It looks like we each got a set of gundam models and some power ranger zords.” Her magic pulled out a bunch of models of the main 6 gundams from Gundam Wing and a bunch Tigerzords and Dragozords from the box. “Gimme gimme gimme,” Pinkie said, grabbing hers. “I’m gonna make them pink. Sandrock looks pretty cool,” she said, putting the model down. “Oh, hey Big Zam,” Pinkie said, holding a box containing a bulky two legged green mech. “These are so cool,” Spike said, opening the Shenlong model kit. He started to look at the instructions to see how to put it together without messing up. Twilight set her to the side while looking in the box and said, “ That’s odd.” “What’s odd, darling?” Rarity asked, tying up her stuff so they can be easily carried later. “Is there something else in there?” “Wait there's something else? Please tell me it's one of the swords,” Rainbow asked, practically getting in Twilight’s face. With all the cool stuff the others were getting, she wanted something for herself. “Are there swords in the box, Twilight?” Starlight asked, hopefully. “I think we could use them,” she said, glancing at the mad god in the room. “No, it's just a package for Flash and Derpy,” the princess of friendship said, levitating as bulky looking wrapped parcel. Twilight then used her magic to place the parcel in front of the pegasus couple. The two looked at the package before they started to tear it open to reveal some bright red and light blue jackets. “Did we just get clothes?” Flash asked, taking the red jacket and putting it on with Derpy doing the same. Once the two had them on, they looked in the convenient mirror to see how they looked and were surprised. “Are we wearing Noin’s and Zech’s jackets?” Derpy asked, hovering in the air as she looked at her outfit. Flash was looking at his from every corner and said, “I’m liking this.” “I must say, you two pull off the look marvelously,” Rarity said, taking a few notes on the designs. Before anyone else could say anything, Deadman grabbed Flash and Shining while said, “Alright, I’m just gonna drop him off and then I’m outtie. Now say goodbye Flashy and Shiny.” “Goodbye Flashy and Shiny,” Everyone said, grinning at the pouting stallion as he and the god just popped out of existence. “I better go home and check on my little muffin,” Derpy said, walking out the front door and leaving the rest of the group to their own devices. The group just looked at the door before shrugging and turning back to the TV. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ CHAPTER END! NEXT TIME RYU VS SCORPION. Ryu VS Scorpion“Alright. Ready for the next episode?”Twilight asked her friends happily. “Yeah/Yes/Hell Yeah,” everyone said at the same time. As Twilight levitated the remote to herself, she began looking up at the ceiling. Everyone just stared at their lavender friend as she was looking all over the place for something. “You okay there, Twi?” Applejack asked, uncertainly. “I’m just waiting for something else to come crashing down before we start the episode,” Twilight said, still looking around for any hidden surprises. “Just start the episode, egghead. We’re not gonna have anyone else come here and watch this episode,” Rainbow said, trying to get this episode started. Twilight just sighed and said, “Yeah, you’re right.” She then pressed play to start the episode. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Interlude (*Cues: Invader - Jim Johnston*) Wiz: Two marquis warriors, arcade rivals since the 90's, now facing off for true superiority. “So another fan rivalry?” asked Spike with a raised brow. “Seems so” answered Twilight. Boomstick: Ryu, the wandering world warrior. “Oh this should be quit the fight!” cheered Luna as she felt a strange connection to this Ryu fellow. Wiz: And Scorpion, the ninja from hell. “Well dang i gauss Ember is missing out on this one,” muttered Spike, he had a feeling that he was going to get an ear full from his fellow dragon when she finds out she missed an episode with a ninja. Boomstick: He's Wiz and I'm Boomstick. Wiz: And it's our job to analyze their weapons, armor, and skills to find out who would win... a Death Battle. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Ryu (*Cues: Street Fighter Assasin's Fist - Dragon Punch*) Wiz: Endlessly walking the earth and improving his fighting skill is the life of Ryu, the Japanese martial artist without a home. The group had to respect some that was dedicated to improving himself but that didn’t stop them from feeling bad about Ryu not having a home. “Poor thing,” whimpered Fluttershy as she held her Doomguy plushie close. “Poor fella, I couldn’t even imagine not having a home to come back too,” muttered Applejack. Boomstick: But there's more to this karate hobo than meets the eye. After being dumped on a doorstep by his douchebag parents, he was adopted by the mysterious Gouken. From that moment on, Ryu dedicated his life to martial arts. Probably on some sort of parental vengeance quest. “He looks pretty clean for a hobo,” Rainbow said bluntly. “Rainbow Dash, that’s a terrible thing to say,” Rarity sad, horrified by her friend’s choice of words. Background Height: 175 cm | 5'9" Weight: 68 kg | 150 lbs Birthday: July 21, 1964 Blood Type: O Dislikes: spiders, wearing shoes Capable of sleeping anywhere Has eyebrows so epic that they cannot be contained by his headband Wiz: He trained alongside his best friend and rival, Ken Masters. Gouken taught them the Ansatsuken, or Assassin's Fist fighting style. “Kind of feels weird to have a hero know something called the Assassin's Fist... Even if it does some pretty badass.” Rainbow mumbled. Wiz: But the name is actually a bit misleading. While originally designed as a means to murder, Gouken's personal take on the Ansatsuken is based around karate, kenpo, judo, and NOT killing people. Unlike the ways of his violent brother, Akuma, who, ultimately, would prove to be his undoing. The group was stuck between shivering in fear of the mentioning Akuma or bowing their heads in sadness when the show talk about Goukens death at the hands of his brother. (*Cues: Street Fighter Assassin's Fist - Lake Run*) Boomstick: Oh yeah, he can fingerpaint. Everyone gave the t.v a glare at Boomsticks inappropriate joke. “Dammit Boomstick,” growled Luna. Boomstick: Well the Assassin's Fist isn't your average McDojo style. His Ryu Shoryuken is an uppercut so powerful, it launches his victims sky high. The Hadouken uses a fighters willpower to fire a blast of energy and destroy evil things, like... waterfalls. Wiz: And... physics? “....What?” Twilight asked asked, seeing the tear and the waterfalls path. “Just calm down, Twilight. We don’t need you to lose yourself,” Rarity said, trying to calm her scholar of a friend. Luckily Twilight took her advice and instantly calmed down. Boomstick: And finally the Tatsu, uuuh... Tatsu...maki...senpuu... Wiz: Tatsumaki Senpukyaku. Boomstick: I HAD IT! Anyway the thing I totally know how to pronounce, gives the finger to gravity and lets him briefly fly around like some humans helicopter kicking machine. “Ya suck it gravity!” cheered Rainbow dash with a whoop of joy much to her friend Fluttershy embarrassment. “Please calm down Rainbow Dash…” whispered Fluttershy. Wiz: He also has a powerful step kick he calls the Joudan Sokutogeri. Boomstick: Hey! We don't have the translation for that one! I'm on it. “Oh no…” muttered Rarity, having a feeling that Boomstick was about to do something stupid. (*Types Joudan Sokutougeri into Google Translate.*) Boomstick: AND DIARRHEA JOKE FOOT?!! HAHAHAHA! Rainbow, Pinkie and Spike began to laugh at Boomstick’s translation as the others such as Twilight, AJ, and Rarity frowned, though Starlight and Luna were biting their lips, trying to avoid snickering. “I’m not even surprised,” Rarity said sadly, somewhat expecting this. (*Cues: Street Fighter 3: 3rd Strike - Ryu Stage (KOBU Inspiration)*) Boomstick: What does it do?! Kick people in the stomach so hard that he takes them to Brown Town?! “Gross,” muttered Starlight slightly green from the conversation. Wiz: With the CORRECT kanji it's more like... "High Level Leg Blade Kick". Boomstick: You know it's "Diarrhea Kick" forever in my mind now, right? “Same with us,” Pinkie, Rainbow and Spike said, calming down from their laughing fit. The others just rolled their eyes at the stupidity of the joke. Ansatsuken Fighting Style Shoryuken "Rising Dragon Fist" Generally Ryu's most powerful technique Hadouken "Wave Motion Fist" Contrary to popular belief, not actually composed of fire Tatsumaki Senpukyaku "Tornado Whirlwind Leg" Can safely pass over many projectile attacks Joudan Sokutogeri Forceful enough to bounce opponents off of walls Wiz: *Sigh* At the age of 23, Ryu entered the first World Warrior Tournament to test his skill. He swept through nine powerful combatants before taking on the champion, Sagat. After a hard fought battle, Sagat was set to take the win… The group shuddered once an image of the muay thai master and the air of power he gave off, add his towering height and appearance made most of the group want to run home and hide under their beds… well all except Rarity who was trying her best to hide a blush. ‘Such a commanding presence,’ thought Rarity as She fanned herself. Boomstick: ...until he made the mistake of being a good sport. After beating the shit out of Ryu, Sagat offered him a helping hand up. Instead of taking it, Ryu gave him a surprise punch SO HARD it ripped his chest open and nearly killed the guy. Dick move, Ryu. Dick move. This shocked the everyone and the more sensitive of the group where doing everything they could not to puke at the image of Sagat laying on the ground with his chest ripped open. “Oh god…” muttered Twilight while covering Spike's eyes. “Whimper,” cried Fluttershy while Rainbow Dash held her close while trying not to think about what they just saw. “I might hate losing but i would do that to the person who beated me,” muttered the blue mare. “That ain’t right,” Applejack said, not turning away as Rarity grew pale at the sight. “What power,” Luna said, amazed by the damage Ryu did. Starlight and Pinkie were crying a little at the sight as Pinkie’s hair went flat. (*Cues: Street Fighter IV - Theme of Evil Ryu*) Wiz: This was Ryu's first taste of the dark power buried within him. The Satsui no Hado. Literally the Surge Of Murderous intent. Boomstick: Still not as good a name as the "Diarrhea Joke Foot". “SHUT UP, BOOMSTICK,” Rarity yelled, feeling her veins pulse on her forehead. Wiz: The Satsui no Hado gives Ryu incredible power but at the expense of his humanity. He can tap a portion of this power to safely enhance his attacks however, should his desire to win become so great he would even commit murder. The Satsui no Hado can overwhelm him and he will lose control becoming Evil Ryu. “Just like every quick and easy power up,” said Twilight sarcastically. “Just like most of the baddies we’ve faced!” laughed Pinkie. Boomstick: Now we're talking! Wiz: Evil Ryu has enormous power to the point of being almost unstoppable. He can even blast a skyscraper to smithereens. “Again that is impressive for somepony who doesn't like magic,” said Luna impressed even if said feat was done using dark powers. Boomstick: He can teleport short distances, even passing through attacks along the way. More impressively, despite Gouken never teaching him this, Evil Ryu can use the Ansatsuken's forbidden technique, the Shun Goku Satsu, more commonly known as the Raging Demon. That sent shivers down everyone’s spines when THAT move was mentioned. “Can anyone use that technique by just using the Satsui No Hado?” asked a confused Starlight as she scratched her head in confusion. Satsui No Hado A form of ki based around man's evil nature Greatly increases the speed, power and ferocity of its user Grants access to the most fatal Ansatsuken technique, the Raging Demon Has an addictive quality, making it hard to turn away from Causes hair to turn red, eyes glow white, and teeth to sharpen (*Cues: Street Fighter IV - Akuma vs. Ryu*) Wiz: With this, Evil Ryu turns his foes own sins against them, and eradicates their soul. It was this exact attack, which Akuma, a master of the Dark Hadou, used to murder Ryu's master. Since then, Akuma has been haunting Ryu, tempting to succumb and fully commit to the dark Satsui No Hado as well, basically, this is "Karate Star Wars". “Pfft no way,” laughed Rainbow Dash not seeing the comparison. Boomstick: Oh, you call everything Star Wars. Wiz: Well, some even speculate that Akuma is Ryu's father. “What!” screamed the group, having a hard time imagining a monster like Akuma having a child. They shivered at the thought of what Ryu’s mother would look like if that was true. Boomstick: Mother of God...It is "Karate Star Wars"! “What a twist!” yelled Pinkie Pie. Wiz: But Gouken's teachings instilled a powerful belief in Ryu. If he can resist and shun this dark temptation, he can attain an even greater power. This caught the group’s attention especially Luna who felt deep down in her heart that she needed to pay close attention to what was about to be said. Boomstick: By detaching himself from all emotion, he enters an altered state of consciousness. “I don’t the sound of that,” muttered Pinkie Pie not liking the sounds of having to separate from your emotions to get stronger. Wiz: Like a Jedi. Boomstick: This boosts his speed, power, and can do all sorts of crazy shit to his abilities. Wiz: This is the Power of Nothingness. Boomstick: Stupid name! Wiz: The Power of Nothingness is more focused than the Dark Hado, allowing Ryu complete control over his mind and body. Gouken even once used this power to separate himself from his soul in order to survive Akuma's Raging Demon. Surprise! Obi Wan is still alive! The younger mares and dragon began to talk about that amazing power, Luna thought back to what happened after Akuma’s fight. She looked at her hooves as she remembered the power she felt that radiated off of them at that moment. She then shook her head and looked back at the screen, making a promise to see what that power was later. Power of Nothingness Foil to the Satsui No Hado Resembles states of being found in Buddhism Brings a hyper awareness of the universe to the user Boosts one's strength and speed without losing clarity of thought Causes eyes to glow blue-white Can be used to withstand even the dreaded Raging Demon (*Cues: Marvel Vs Capcom 3 - Theme of Ryu*) Boomstick: Ryu is skilled enough to take on numerous thugs at once, tough enough to survive being impaled, and strong enough to overpower the genetically-created super warrior Seth. Oh, and he's fast enough to dodge point blank gunfire! Wiz: Yet as Evil Ryu his aura's so strong he can just walk through bullets. Boomstick: That being said, being the Street Fighter poster boy doesn't mean he's the top world warrior. He's lost a number of matches fair and square against the likes of M. Bison, Oro, and even his best friend Ken. “Who ever this Ken guy is sounds like a cool guy,” said Rainbow Dash with everyone agreeing with her…. What i’m a Ken fan. Wiz: However, many of these losses may stem from his struggle to contain the power of the Dark Satsui no Hado, which is obviously quite difficult to do in the middle of a battle. “Sounds reasonable,” Twilight said, agreeing with the logic behind it. Boomstick: But when Ryu unleashes his full potential, stay the fuck out of his way! Evil Ryu: My name is Ryu, and the ultimate power has awakened within me! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ While Ryu had his fair share of problems, the group had to respect his drive as a fighter. “I shall put my faith on the wandering fighter,” said Luna. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Scorpion (*Cues: Unknown Theme*) Wiz: From Earthrealm to Outworld there were few who didn't fear the ruthless clan known as the Lin Kuei. Boomstick: Except the Shirai Ryu; a clan with some serious balls. Not only do they defect from the Lin Kuei, they mock them on a daily basis by wearing obvious palette-swaps of their clothes. They also like to pull classic pranks like annoying phone calls, TP-ing Lin Kuei homes and constantly slaughtering their loved ones. Haha, got ´em! “That is messed up…” Spike said as the others were shocked by the cruelty of the clan. Wiz: From the Shirai Ryu came Hanzo Hasashi, the hellish ninja of vengeance. (*Cues: Unknown Theme*) Wiz: But before he became the stuff of nightmares, he was once an ordinary young child...whose father just happened to be a deadly assassin. In hopes of sparing him from a violent life of regret and murder, Hanzo´s father forbade him from ever joining the clan. The group had to respect Hanzo’s father for wanting to keep his son away from such a bloody past, even if it was all in vain. Background Real name: Hanzo Hasashi Height: 6'2"/188 cm Weight: 210 lbs/95 kg Physical age: 32 General of the Shirai Ryu clan Kombat Styles: Ninjutsu, Pi Gua, Hapkido, and Moi Fah Strongly prefers foes to come to him Creator Ed Boon's favourite character Boomstick: Sorry son, you're not allowed to be awesome. “That sucks,” Spike and Rainbow said, pouting a little. The rest of the group just giggled at them before returning to the episode. (*Cues: Lower Mines/The Pit - Mortal Kombat Deception*) Wiz: However, as time went on, Hanzo became desperate. he needed a way to support not only himself but also his wife and son. Faced with few other options, he reluctantly disobeyed his father and began the life on a ninja assassin. While the group didn’t agree with his choice but they could understand and even respect why he chose to join the clan against his father’s wishes. “You’d do anything for you family,” muttered Applejack, thinking of what lengths she go to protect both her blood family and the family she and her friends had made. Boomstick: As a ninja, Hanzo is exceptionally skilled in Ninjutsu, Pi Gua, Hapkido and numerous secret Chinese martial arts. But it´s his weapon of choice that earned him the nickname Scorpion. (*Cues: Scorpion's Theme - Mortal Kombat 9*) Scorpion: GET OVER HERE! *Fires his kunai spear into Sub-Zero´s head and then tears it right off, letting it fly past him* “AWSOME! Cheered Rainbow Dash. Boomstick: While his kunai-in-a-rope is iconic and deadly, I´m more partial to whatever the hell that snake creature is that lives in his hand. Well, in whatever form, it impales the opponent and pulls them in close, usually for a sweet uppercut to the jaw. The group was creeped out when they saw that thing slithered out of his hand. Luna had the distincit feeling she might get a nightmare or two out of that. Wiz: This is similar to an ancient assassination weapon used in the Tang dynasty called the Rope Dart. It's extremely difficult to master, making Scorpion´s finesse all the more impressive. “Meh I think roping slinging gal like myself could handle no prob,” bragged Applejack in a rare moment of bausting. Moveset Kunai Spear Closest real-life equivalent was called the rope dart Also previously depicted as a mace or a serpent creature Has also been used by Reptile, Smoke, and Noob Saibot Hellfire Punch Fire Breath Leg Takedown Flaming Backflip Kick Scorpion Sting Boomstick: He´s also profesioned with several weapons like long swords, twin katanas and axes. *Scorpion knocks Sub-Zero down* Dan Forden: Toasty! This got a laugh from the group. Wiz: Scorpion´s weaponry and combat prowess were put to the ultimate test by the legendary Lin Kuei warrior Bi Han, a.k.a. Sub-Zero. “Wow that guy sounds… COOL~!” joked Pinkie Pie much to the suffering of her friends. (*Cues: Soul Chamber Theme - Mortal Kombat Trilogy*) Wiz: And things didn't go so well for our yellow-clad ninja. Next thing he knew, Scorpion was waking up in the Netherrealm. Boomstick: More commonly known as Hell. Bet you wished you listened to Dad now, then maybe you could have ended up in a happier place, with your murdered wife and kid--oh yeah, they're dead too. “W-what?” whimpered out Fluttershy as the rest of the group were also trying to progress what Boomstick just said. “O-oh my god.” gasped out Applejack as she saw Hanzo grieve over his deceased wife and kids. Wiz: Enraged at Sub-Zero for apparently killing all he´d sworn to protect, Scorpion scored a second chance striking a deal with the sorcerer Quan Chi. In exchange for his loyalty, Scorpion was resurrected as a phantom of the Netherrealm The group had to give some pity for the fallen warrior even if he was going down the wrong path. (*Cues: Reptile's Theme (Skrillex) - Mortal Kombat 9*) *Scorpion teleports out of the ground, lands and engulfs himself in flames* “TOASTY!” yelled Pinkie Pie. Boomstick: And being reborn as a demon of vengeance has its perks. Scorpion can now teleport, summon fire at will and create portals in and out of the Netherrealm he was spawned from, literally dragging others to Hell! Whilst there, his +1s can enjoy such tourist locations as Lava Pit and witness the corpse-burning celebration called: The Festival of Torture. Fun times! “Not my kind if fun times,” Pinkie said, cringing from the grotesque imagery. “Ah don’t think that’s anyone's kind of fun, sugarcube,” Applejack said, cringing just as much as Pinkie. The rest of the group were agreeing to that as the person who thinks that’s fun would be one sick individual. Wiz: The Netherrealm is the source of Scorpion´s demonic power and his strength rises simply by his being there. “That could be a deciding factor,” muttered Twilight as she saved that little tidbit of info for later. Wraith Abilities Teleportation Commonly used to surprise attack enemies from behind Netherrealm Portals Quick access to the underworld and back anytime Control over hellfire Explosive fireballs Summoning flames under his opponent Surrounds himself in harmful flames Can even breathe out fire Cannot die from physical attacks Boomstick: Scorpion is so vicious he can perform no fewer than thirteen different Fatalities. Wiz: He can rip a person's head from their body - spine included. “Damn!” cursed a green face Rainbow Dash. Boomstick: That´s not something you just do, that´s art right there. “I would have to question your taste in art,” Rarity said faintly as the others silently agreed. Wiz: Rip of his mask to show his true face- Boomstick: AAAAAH, WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT THING?!?! “Spooky scary skeletons~,” Pinkie began to sing before someone smacked the back of her head. “Now’s not the time for singing,” Starlight said, lowering her hoof. Wiz: And score a kill by transforming into a, well, giant scorpion, of course. ...or a penguin. Boomstick/everyone: Wait, WHAT?! (*Cues: Lower Mines/The Pit - Mortal Kombat Deception again*) Wiz: And although Scorpion was far from the most powerful combatant in the Mortal Kombat tournament, he has defeated lethal warriors across multiple worlds. He´s conquered sorcerers, demons, cyborgs and eventually avenged his death by incinerating Bi Han in the Netherrealm. Boomstick: But it turns out that that Sub-Zero guy was kind of innocent. The man actually responsible for the death of his family was Quan Chi. You know, that guy he swore himself to and has been working for this whole time? Man, Scorpion's kinda like the Charlie Brown of Mortal Kombat. “So let me see if I got this: This guy killed Scorpion's family, made it look like Sub-Zero did it, got him to work for him, and then tricked him into killing Sub-Zero so he could have another powerful minion?” Rainbow asked, getting very angry at the white sorcerer. “THE SORCERER MUST DIE! DIE A PAINFUL AND EXCRUCIATING DEATH!” Luna yelled, feeling nothing but contempt for Quan Chi. (thank ya shinigamisparda for the comment idea.) (*Cues: A Charlie Brown Christmas - Christmas Time is Here (Instrumental)*) Quan Chi knocks Scorpion down a flight of stairs. “Dick,” growled out Spike. (*Cues: Unknown Theme*) Wiz: As penance for his mistake, Scorpion dedicated his life after death to protecting the late Sub-Zero's younger brother...Sub-Zero. “... not very imaginative with names are they?” muttered Starlight with a flat look. Fatalities Spine Rip Removes victim's head with bare hands Presumely learned it from Sub-Zero Toasty! Scorpion's fire breath incinerates the target in seconds Hand from Hell A flaming skeletal hand pulls the enemy to hell Spear Slice Cuts victims in half and beheads them Animalities Becomes a scorpion and tears them in half ... Or becomes an adorable penguin Boomstick: Though he still found time for shooting three's, hitting homers, and hosting his own cooking show! VO: This week on "Cooking with Scorpion", learn about chopping.... (Caption: Yes...this is real...) Rainbow's eye twitched at what she was seeing. “I… I don't even…” “I have no words,” Luna said, unsure of what she was seeing. “This is just surreal, it's like if Tirek had his own tea-shop…” Twilight said. “At least he knows how to cook,” Pinkie said, happy to see the ninja preparing something to eat. She began to wonder if he could bake a cake or other pastries. Boomstick: Yeah, I'm not gonna trust anything that guy makes. Does he even eat anymore? Wiz: Aside from his weakness for the culinary arts, Scorpion's win-loss record is not as intimidating as you might think. But consider the outrageous scope of his competition. “Ya with the whole battling GODS,” snarked Luna. Boomstick: Any way you look at it, it's tough to be much more of a badass then a fire-breathing skeleton ninja from Hell. Scorpion: I am Scorpion, vengeance will be mine! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Wiz: Alright, the combatants are set. Let's end this debate once and for all. Boomstick: It's time for a Death Battle! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ The group had to pity Hanzo for being used and for going down the wrong path. “Ah think i’ll root for the poor fella,” said Applejack. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Death Battle (*Cues: Unknown Theme*) Ryu is seen standing in a mountainous location, when suddenly, a voice calls out to him. Scorpion: Get over here! “He’s using his spear,” Rainbow said excitedly, holding her hooves in front of her face. (*Cues: Street Fighter IV - Volcanic Rim Opening Version*) Ryu catches the kunai spear flying at him. Ryu: Can't fool me! He then pulls Scorpion into the area. Ryu: Come on! FIGHT! Scorpion teleports to Ryu which he blocks. He tries landing a flurry of punches but Ryu avoids them. Ryu punches Scorpion in the skull and knocks him over. Ryu tries punching Scorpion while he's on the ground but Scorpion teleports right before he does so. Scorpion: Come here! “That teleporting power is going to get annoying real quick,” muttered Rainbow Dash. Scorpion tries once again to catch Ryu with his kunai spear, but Ryu deflects the attack with his Hadouken, knocking it back at Scorpion. He then teleports before the Hadouken can hit him. Teleporting behind Ryu, Scorpion then punches Ryu in the face, disorienting him. While Ryu is dizzy, Scorpion summons a katana and attempts to slice him. But, before he can do so, Ryu wakes up and dodges the sword slashes, “Gees~ he was… CUTTING it close their!” joked Pinkie Pie with a huge grin. GODDAMMIT BARB/YANG!” screamed Starlight and Twilight. “Who the heck is Barb?” asked Applejack, weirded out from her friends outburst. “Ya and who’s Yang?” Rainbow Dash also asked the two unicorns. Said unicorns gave each other confused looks before turning to the rest of the group. “We… don’t know… muttered Twilight. “Ya it just came out,” said Starlight, wondering where her outburst came from. subsequently kicking Scorpion in the face with his Tatsumaki Senpukyaku, uppercutting him with a Shoryuken, then kicking him off the mountain with the Joudan Sokutougeri. Scorpion is on his knees. Ryu lands on his feet in front of him. Ryu: Can you stand up after that? “If it was any normal fella i’d say not,” muttered Applejack keeping an eye on Scorpion, knowing the hell ninja would not go down easily. “Ya if the guy can take on gods then he should be still rearing to go,” agreed Rainbow Dash. When Scorpion does not answer, Ryu slowly begins approaching him. Ryu: I'll finish this! “I think you should leave while you're ahead,” suggested Fluttershy quietly. “Well we all know that’s not an option,” Spike told the yellow pegasus much that pained her to agree with the young dragon on that one. Ryu throws out a punch, which Scorpion suddenly catches to Ryu's surprise. Scorpion: YOU WILL JOIN ME IN HELL! Scorpion drags Ryu close and opens a portal to the Netherrealm, dragging them both into it. “Aaaannnndd that's game,” declared Twilight. The rest of the group wondered what she meant before they all remembered that scorpion had a huge home field advantage. “.....dammit,” muttered the Moon Princess. (*Cues: Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance - Rising Action 1*) In the Netherrealm, Ryu and Scorpion face off again. Ryu smiles at his opponent. Ryu: Hmmm, this is some fight! “Well at least he’s enjoying it i guess,” said Rarity, not really getting the warrior mentality. Scorpion lets loose with a ball of Hellfire, but Ryu counters with his Hadouken. Scorpion suddenly teleports behind Ryu and kicks him in the back. He then begins alternating back and forth with teleportation attacks, landing blows and sword slashes. “Told ya that teleporting thing was going to get old,” muttered Rainbow Dash, He brings Ryu to his knees panting. However, Ryu bites down on the pain and warns Scorpion. Ryu: Neither of us has reached our full potential! Scorpion: As if that matters! “He’s right you know,” said Twilight with a know it all tone. Then Hellfire bursts under Ryu trying to burn him to death as Scorpion laughs. Suddenly, a voice calls out to him. Ryu: It's not over! Ryu starts tapping into the power of the Satsui no Hado as his clothes start growing darker. (*Cues: Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance - A Soul Can't be Cut*) Ryu's transformation to Evil Ryu is complete. “...ya~ even i wouldn't go that far to win,” said Rainbow Dash. Evil Ryu: Surprised? “Meh i’ve seen weirder,” shrugged Pinkie Pie. Scorpion fires off another ball of Hellfire, but Evil Ryu simply punches it away. Evil Ryu: I'LL SHOW YOU WHAT I'M MADE OF! Evil Ryu leaps forward and delivers several aerial Hadoukens. Scorpion dodges them but Evil Ryu lands on top of him, pinning him down. Using a Hellfire kick, Scorpion knocks Evil Ryu away and charges in with his sword. Evil Ryu breaks the sword with his hands and warns Scorpion. Evil Ryu: Don't expect mercy! “Geeze we get you're evil already!” yelled out Spike getting some laughs from the girls. Ryu lets loose with a brutal combination, including the Tatsumaki Zankukyaku, and the Shin-Shoryuken. However, Scorpion still gets up from that pummeling. Ryu's eyes glows as he teleports forward to finish off his opponent. Evil Ryu: GOTCHA! Evil Ryu then try to use the Raging Demon technique, but Scorpion easily teleports out of the way, and ends up behind Evil Ryu. Scorpion takes off his mask, revealing his skull as he tries his Toasty Fatality on Evil Ryu. Evil Ryu dodges it, and the two exchange blows again. Scorpion catches Evil Ryu with an uppercut, and using his Rope Spear, knocks Evil Ryu back and forth three times with a Juggling Combo. ending with a Hellfire blast that knocks Evil Ryu back again. Evil Ryu bounces away, then reverts back to normal Ryu as the Satsu no Hado is spent. Panting hard, Ryu focuses all of his remaining power while on his knees. Ryu: Concentrate... I will NOT succumb to evil! “But you just did?” said Starlight, but was shushed by Luna who wanted to focus on the rest of the fight but mostly she just wanted to see the power of nothingness. Ryu attains the Power of Nothingness, as Scorpion slowly approaches to finish Ryu off. Ryu focuses his power as he prepares to let loose one final blast. His eyes glowing, Ryu lets off one final warning to his foe. (*Cues: Unknown Theme*) Ryu: I walk the path of a true warrior. THIS IS THE POWER OF MANKIND! SHINKU-HADOUKEN! “Damn~!” said the group in awe as they all put on some sunglasses to keep the bright light from the Shinku-Hadouken from hurting their eye’s. Ryu fires the Shinku Hadouken at Scorpion, who makes no attempt to evade or block it. He is engulfed in the attack and is reduced to a standing, charred skeleton. Ryu falls to his knees, totally spent. “Wow…. toasty,” whispered Pinkie Pie. Ryu: I walk a path... with no end. “.... how’s he going to get out of there?” asked Fluttershy getting everyone to realise that Ryu was pretty much stuck there. (*Cues: Unknown Theme*) Suddenly, Scorpion's skeleton starts moving again, shocking Ryu. “Huh so that’s a thing he can do,” said a surprised Starlight. Scorpion: I will crush your bones! With that said, he fires a stream of Hellfire at the completely exhausted Ryu, who can only look on in shock as he is incinerated by the attack, reducing him to ashes. Scorpion then laughs. K.O.! Scorpion then turns into a penguin and lays an egg, which proceeds to explode and destroy Ryu's remains. “Really?” muttered Rainbow Dash, still thinking that penguin form was stupid. “So cute~!” but it seemed Fluttershy disagreed. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Results (*Cues: Mortal Kombat 9 - Shao Kahn's Throne Room*) Boomstick: I'm no chef but that looks a bit overcooked. “I agree!” said Pinkie, wearing a chefs hat. Wiz: Ryu's Satsui no Hado and the Power of Nothingness were incredibly powerful, but raw power alone is not enough to destroy Scorpion. Boomstick: Yet, Scorpion's advantage of already being dead didn't make this a cakewalk. In fact Ryu had a perfect way to permanently end Scorpion: the soul-killing Raging Demon, but he could avoid the instant murder move, thanks to his awesome ninja skills and teleportation. “This is why ninjas are cool. Teleporting and kicking ass is how it’s done,” Rainbow said, crossing her hooves. Wiz: Not to mention Ryu has very little experience actually using the Raging Demon anyway. But most importantly, Scorpion's strength increases the longer he remains in the Netherrealm, with no defining limit. Once trapped in hell with Scorpion, Ryu stood little chance in the long run. “Like i sai-!” Twilight was about to say but Starlight placed a hoof to her mouth and gave the Princess of friendship a flat look. “We know already,” muttered the mare with the rest of the group nodding in agreement. Twilight could only blush in embarrassment before giving her friends a weak laugh, “Giggle… sorry.” Boomstick: Zero chance if Scorpion just upped and teleported him into a pool of lava, which he could totally do. Scorpion was just too hot to handle. Wiz: The Winner is Scorpion. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ (no trailer for this one.) ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ “Our stars. We thought the power of Nothingness would have triumphant over the Hellish Ninja,” Luna said, stretching her wings. She then slid off the couch and said, “At least he died like a true warrior.” “It was a close match though,” Twilight said, walking towards the glowing box. “Yeah but ninjas rule. Now let's see what we got,” Rainbow said, flying towards the box. She seemed excited at what they could get from this episode. “We might as well,” Fluttershy said softly, following her impatient friend. The rest of the group gathered around the box as Spike opened it and peered inside. “Woah,” Spike said, leaning over the edge of the box. “Did you find anything, darling?” Rarity asked, slightly curious. “Yeah. We got some cool stuff,” Spike said, jumping into the box and rummaging around. “What did we get?” Rainbow asked, a bit too impatiently as she got closer to the box. “We got this stuff,” Spike said as jumped out of the box while waving around comics in one hand and a couple of action figures in the other. He started to hand out the stuff as Twilight used her magic to get him out of the box. “Better keep these away from Sweetie Belle,” Rarity said, storing her comics in her saddle bags. “Agreed. There are some things they shouldn’t see,” Applejack said, putting the comics in her saddle bags. “Wait, there’s something else,” Spike said, opening the box once more. He was about to jump back into the box when two small boxes rose in the air as Twilight took a look at the boxes. “Huh, that’s odd,” Twilight said, sounding generally confused. “What’s odd?” Starlight asked before she was pushed to the side by an impatient Rainbow Dash. “Is it another thing or two for one of us? Is it? Is it?” Rainbow asked, getting closer and closer to Twilight with each question. “Yes and it’s for Luna and Fluttershy,” Twilight said, levatating the boxes past a disappointed Rainbow and towards their respective owners. The two grabbed their boxes and began to tear off the wrapping to see what was inside. To everyone’s surprise they saw Luna holding a familiar red headband and Fluttershy trying on a familiar yellow and black outfit. “My stars,” Luna said, looking at the headband in awe. The small group were very curious about the headband and wanted to ask about it when they heard a deep voice say, “GET OVER HERE.” The group and Luna turned to look at their meek friend looking at them before she tried to hide behind her mane. “If that’s ok,” Fluttershy said in her normal quiet voice. “How did you….. Never mind,” Twilight said, not wanting another headache. “This sucks,” Rainbow said, pouting. “Language,” Rarity said, “But what do you mean, darling?” “It’s just that everyone gets cool stuff. Spike got his grappling hook, Shining got his awesome shield and sword and even the Dazzlings got those cool looking outfits,” Rainbow said, flying towards the box. Kicking the box, Rainbow mutters, “Stupid box.” To Rainbow’s surprise, the box opened up and launched a decent sized box into the air. Everyone watched as the box flew there the air and landed on Rainbow’s head as she said, “Ow. What the hell?” Rarity used her magic to catch the box before it landed on the ground and broke whatever was inside. Walking towards her friend, Rarity asked, “Are you alright?” “Yeah, I’m fine but what hit me,” Rainbow said, rubbing the top of her head. “Well it was this. And there’s a note as well,” Rarity said, handing the box and the note to Rainbow. The athletic pegasus took the note and began to read it as she said, “What?” “What’s wrong, Dashie?” Pinkie asked, tilting her head to the side. “Dear Skittles. Here’s your crummy gift. Now stop kicking my box, it took a while for Trepp to make it and i don’t want ask for another. Love Deadman,” Rainbow said, reading the not out loud. She then opened the box and pulled out a very detailed statue of Scorpian in his golden costume. “I’m guessing you’re happy now?” Rarity, Twilight and Starlight said at the same time. “Yeah, this is pretty awesome,” Rainbow said, putting the statue back in the box. “Gonna need to make some space for this,” Rainbow muttered to herself. “Alas my friends but i must take my leave now,” Luna said, levitating her stuff towards her. “Until the next time my friends,” Luna said before teleporting back to Canterlot City. “She sure likes to make her dramatic exits,” Starlight said with everyone else nodding. Later in Luna’s Room Luna had her eyes closed as she tried to remember the power she felt from those few weeks ago. She searched her very soul for this power as the lunar princess felt something. It was small at first but the more she focused the more that power grew. Luna started to rise onto her back hooves as she balanced on them with ease as she brought her hooves together and moved them to her side, copying Ryu’s move. Getting into position, Luna tried to focus all that power into her hooves as she pushed them forward and yelled, “HADOKEN.” She opened her eyes just in time to see a familiar blue blast shot from her hooves and into a wall and destroy it. Luna just stood their as the wall crumbled to reveal her sister Celestia was in the next room but she wasn’t alone. To her surprise, she saw her sister in one of those new hot tubs with a very buff looking pegasus with a long blonde mane and beard and a gold coat and had a hammer lying next to the tub. The hot tubbing ponies looked at the lunar princess in surprise as they sat there. “I can explain,” Celestia said quickly. Luna started to slowly back as she said, “No need, sister. I’ll just see myself out. No reason to stop on my account.” She used her magic to open the door as she slowly backed out of the room as the door closed. Deadpool VS Deathstroke.~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ outside the fourth wall ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Me: ok everyone i hope enjoy todays chapter and i’m sorry about it being so late but the my internet was out this weekend. DP: that~ and the fact you were too lazy to get much done! Me: oh fuck no! I had to deal with the Gintama crew a few days ago! I’m not dealing with you! DP: too bad! You new this was going to happen once i was apart of this little story! >:) Me:..... fuck. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ It was a brand new day in Ponyville with the birds singing and the flowers blooming. All the residents seemed to be enjoying the weather as they went on with their daily chores and lives. But there were a few ponies and one dragon who weren't outside, enjoying the day. Inside the crystal castle, the small group were sitting on a couch as they waited for one of their friends to show up. Twilight and the others didn’t have to wait long as Rainbow Dash flew through the window and onto the couch. “Now that everyone's here, we can start this great day with a new episode,” Twilight said as everyone nodded. Just as the others were about to open their mouths to talk, the whole world just stopped turned into different shades of grey. No one moved a muscle or even blinked. It was as if someone pushed the universal pause button on God's remote. “Don’t worry. This'll only take a second,” a cheerful voice said as a human walked into view. The human was dressed in a red and black suit with a couple of harnesses that held a few guns and a couple of swords. He even had a red and black mask covering his face with only his white eyes being visible. “Hi, it's me the Merc with the Mouth, Deadpool. I'm here to help this story along so we can get right to what you want to see. Epic fights, good reactions and best of all, Me,” the now named Deadpool said, bowing to the readers. “I even got permission from the authors to do it so no worries there,” he said, a smile forming under his mask. “HE SHOT ME IN THE ASS,” an angry yet crazy voice yelled for all to hear. “WHY DID HE SHOOT ME IN THE ASS?” “Hey. It's not my fault that you were late to finishing this chapter. So zip it, Deadman,” Deadpool said, pointing at someone who wasn't there. “TREPP. HELP ME. AVENGE MY ASS,” the voice of Deadman screamed. “Avenge your own ass. I'm not dealing with that psychopath again,” the calm voice of Trepp said as the sound of a page being turned was heard. “YOU ASSHOLE!” Shrugging his shoulders, Deadpool waved and said, “Enjoy the show and remember like, favorite and subscribe.” He ran out the door while yelling, “Whoop whoop whoop,” as the episode started. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Interlude (*Cues Invader - Jim Johnston*) Wiz: They say imitation is the highest form of flattery, but sometimes it's nothing but a slap in the face. “Depends on how well you imitate them…” Said Spike, used to seeing a bunch comics with similar heroes and villains. “Though i think for some ponies they would still be offended,” countered Rarity, getting a shrug from Spike. Wiz: Such as the case when it comes to these two masked mercenaries. Boomstick: Deadpool, the Merc with a Mouth. “Yo Rarity why is your eye twitching like that?” asked Rainbow Dash once she new her friend’s eye was twitching after Boomstick said the second fighter's name. “I don’t know darling… it’s just i feel like i’m not going to like this one…” muttered Rarity as she felt like someone out there was laughing at her. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~meanwhile in space~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ “HA!” laughed Deadman out of nowhere, much to Trepp’s confusion. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Wiz: And Deathstroke, the Terminator. “Wait, so he's the robot!?” Pinkie exclaimed in shock. “No, I think he's just human.” Twilight tried to correct her friend. “But he's called the Terminator! Just like the robot!” the pink party pony insisted. “... sigh whatever…” muttered a defeated Twilight. Boomstick: He's Wiz and I'm Boomstick. Wiz: And it's our job to analyze their weapons, armor, and skills to find out who would win... a Death Battle. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Deadpool (*Cues: Marvel vs Capcom 3 - Deadpool Theme (8-bit Instrumental Version)*) Boomstick: You see him on T-Shirts, Internet memes, and EVERYWHERE you look at nerd conventions. “Ugh! Those outfits are awful!” Rarity gagged in disgust, a rock then suddenly hits her head from out of nowhere. “OW! What in the-,” said the fashion designer before she noticed a note on the rock. Note on rock: Hey, don't diss a classic look just yet, babe. ~DP “Uh oh!” Yelped Pinkie Pie before pulling out her party cannon out. (thanks the avenger.) Wiz: But the story behind this popular anti-hero isn't as light hearted as his joking nature would lead you to believe. “I have a bad feeling about this…” whispered Fluttershy. (*Cues: X-Men Origins: Wolverine - Wade Goes to Work*) Wiz: Wade Winston Wilson was a globetrotting mercenary looking for his chance to become the world's next greatest superhero. Then he was diagnosed with cancer, which hit him like a flaming semi truck falling on his face. Boomstick: That's...oddly specific. “Woah… that's… that's just messed up…” Rainbow said, feeling sorry that the would-be hero had gotten his dream snatched away by the cruel hand of fate. “The poor dear….” cried out Fluttershy, breaking out in tears as the rest of the group tried tier best to comfort their friend. Wiz: Facing the inevitability of death, Wade gave up. He abandoned his heroic dreams, stopped his chemo treatments, and dumped his girlfriend to free her from the burden of a man doomed to die. The rest of the group looked down in depression upon hearing this. Spike hugging Rarity tightly, Rainbow wrapped her wing around Fluttershy who broke down into tears yet again. Boomstick: Doomed, until he was offered a cure by Department K, the special weapons development division of the strange, alien world called...Canada. (*Cues: O Canada - English Chamber Orchestra*) (*Cues: X-Men Origins: Wolverine - Deadpool*) Boomstick: And by cure, I mean he actually was handed over to the Weapon X program, the same guys who gave Wolverine's bones the old chrome dip. They injected Wade with Wolvie's healing factor. “Wait, what?” Starlight blinked. “I'm sorry, how does one inject someone with someone else's abilities?” “It’s a comic… just roll with it,” suggested Spike. Wiz: Which I don't even know if that's possible. Do they have like a spare jar of essence of Wolverine or something? “I still want to know who this Wolverine is,” said Twilight, thinking this man must be a big deal from him being mentioned a lot. Background Real Name: Wade Winston Wilson Height: 6'2"/1.88 m Weight: 210 lbs/95 kg Place of Birth: Canada Aliases: Thom Cruz Regenerating Degenerate Ninja Spider-Man Lives with a blind elderly woman An even more cliched cosplay than The Joker Boomstick: With the ability to heal from anything, his body became a surgical playground for Doctor Killebrew and his assistant, Ajax. Just like Operation, only constantly hitting the sides, *buzzer effects* “YIKES.” Spike shuddered. “That poor dear…” whispered Fluttershy. Boomstick: but hey, at least he doesn't have cancer anymore. Wiz: Well, actually he still does. “WAIT, WHAT!?” Rainbow Dash fumed, rage evident on her face. “After all that pain and emotional torment, he's STILL got cancer!? What the actual hell!?” The rest of the group was in a similar state of shock and anger as Rainbow Dash. Wiz: His cells just regenerate faster than the cancer can kill him. Beneath the red and black spandex, he's basically a giant walking tumor, which can talk...a lot. Revealing the panel of Wade without his mask on. Leaving his disfigured face as Wiz describes him afterwards. Boomstick: (panicked) AH! KILL HIM WITH FIRE! “The Elements of Harmony!” screeched Twilight. “Daring Do!” yelled a frighten Rainbow Dash. “Anything!” screamed the rest of the group. Boomstick (everyone): *realized* Oh wait. We can't. (by the avenger) (*Cues: The Deadpool Game - It is a Trap*) Wiz: Meanwhile, among Killebrew's other prisoners, a gambling ring was formed. Patients would place bets on each other's survival under the knife. “Thats sick,” said Starlight in disgust. Boomstick: And these bets were placed of what they called "The Deadpool". Get it? 'Cause that's kinda where his name comes from. You know what, you'll see. Wiz: Unfortunately for Killebrew, Wade had somehow gotten superhuman strength, speed, and stamina. 'Cuz I guess they got a jar filled with that shit too… “Pfft Why stop there?” Rainbow Dash scoffed. “Why not inject him with lazer-eyes, metal bones and teleportation while they're at it?” “I think i just felt the cries of a million enraged fans after what you just said…” muttered Pinkie Pie shaking her head from the sudden feeling of intense hate. Wiz: He used these skills to kill Ajax and make a dramatic escape. Free at last, his fellow inmates inspired him to take on his now famous namesake... Boomstick/Pinkie Pie: Deadpool--- Deadpool enters in, interrupting Boomstick's last sentence. Deadpool: ♪DEADPOOOOOOL♪ Yeah! “Huh?” everyone but Pinkie Pie said dumbfounded. “Where's my Party Cannon!?” gasped out Pinkie Pie when she noticed her weapon of choice was missing, but she did notice a note on the floor where her connon used to be. Note on the floor: can’t have you shooting your cannon at the tv screen while i’m on it! - DP. Glaring at the note Pinkie Pie muttered, “oh it is on like Donkey Kong!” (this joke was made by the avenger with me adding a little bit more with the whole note from deadpool.) Boomstick: What the heck? (*Cues: Marvel vs Capcom 3 - Deadpool's Theme*) Deadpool: (chuckles, talks to Boomstick and Wiz) Oh ho I'm sorry! Please continue talking about how great I am. “Is he talking to Wiz and Boomstick,” asked Applejack, feeling a little bit scared now. Wiz: I was afraid of this. See, Deadpool somehow possess a unique awareness of whatever media he's in. Whether there be comic books, games, tv shows, or an awesome Internet show. Boomstick: Huh in the what now? Wiz: Basically, he's a pro at shattering the fourth wall. “Wait, so you're telling me he’s a fictional character that interacts with the real world!?” Twilight asked in shock. “But that's impossible! How-” “Twilight… i think you need to keep an open mind with this one,” muttered Starlight, much to Twilight’s discomfort. “Yeah, especially since I do it all the time!” Pinkie added, getting confused looks from everyone. Deadpool: Bingo! Oh hey, Boomstick! Tell your ex-wife I said hello~. ["Come Hither" Growl] “Uh-oh….” muttered the group as they noticed Rarity starting to twitch violently. Boomstick: You've got 5 seconds to get the hell out of here before I blow your head off. “Wow I don’t think i’ve ever heard Boomstick this angry before,” gasped out Fluttershy. “And here i thought he hated his ex wife. Guess the world is filled with surprises,” said Rarity with a hint of surprise. (the rarity part was by Pony Of The Ghetto) Wiz: Unfortunately, all that would do is piss him off. Bad idea as Deadpool is a Master Martial Artist, Seasoned Assassin, and a Raging Sex Machine --- what? “Oh sweet Celestia he's worse than Boomstick!” Rarity groaned. Deadpool: Yeah! I noticed that you left a few things in the script, so I made some changes. You know, just the "important" stuff. Like my penis. While some of the group like Rainbow, Dash Pinkie Pie, and Spike laughed at Deadpool’s antics ponies like Rarity where grinding her teeth to the point of making sparks. Boomstick: Well, if by a raging sex machine, he means getting down with a bloated alien, a shape-shifting teenage prostitute, and Death herself, he must have some pretty low standards. That's right; this guy literally tried to stick his dick in Death! “....this guy…. banged the Grim Reaper!?” Spike exclaimed in shock. “HOW!?” Boomstick: Maybe that's why he liked my ex-wife. (*Cues: Deadpool's Old Theme (Le Scar Remix) - Marvel vs Capcom 3*) Boomstick: But besides his dick, Deadpool has an arsenal of weaponry he can pull out from absolutely nowhere! Wiz: This is an animation technique commonly called the Magic Satchel, though its existence as an actual thing is preposterous. “Ya but i have a feeling with Deadpool this is the most tame of his reality bending powers,” said Spike much to Twilight’s growing frustration. Deadpool: Oh yeah? Watch this! Deadpool reaches out from the pit of the satchel, and pulled out a large elephant like pulling out a rabbit out of the top hat. *trumpets* Wiz/Twilight: (annoyed) I hate you... Deadpool: (opposite in same manner of "I love you") Oh I hate you too. Boomstick: Me too. “Me three.” said Pinkie Pie. Boomstick: Some of Deadpool's favorite toys include--- Deadpool's second attempt of interrupting Boomstick from finishing the sentence, again. Deadpool: My trusty rusty twin katanas, some grenades, my two favorite machine guns (Butter and I Can't Believe It's Not Butter), a teleportation belt, an infinity stone that alters continuity... (giddy) Ohoho I can't choose! I love 'em all! Boomstick: (peeved) Okay that's it! I'm gonna kill him! ((loud gun cock noise) aims his shotgun at Deadpool) The group busted out laughing at Deadpool’s zany antics, even Rarity was getting a kick out of Deadpool driving Boomstick nuts. “(sigh) justice…” whispered Rarity, savoring Boomsticks anger. Deadpool: La-la-la-la-la-la-la... (runs away unscathed; the missed gunfire just shot directly to the screen instead) “Sweet apple!” shouted Applejack in surprise, for a second thinking that the shotgun pellets where going to fly off screen and nail them. Abilities Superhuman Body Exceptionally skilled with swords and all forms of guns Mastery in assassination techniques and numerous martial arts Superb healing factor Magic satchel Contains various items, regardless of continuity Includes teleportation belt, machine guns, katanas, pistols and other things Fourth wall awareness RAGING SEX MACHINE (everyone facepalmed at this one.) Wiz: Combined, Deadpool's weapons and abilities has helped him to accomplish some amazing feats in spite of his illness. Boomstick: His quick draw's fast enough to beat 7 Hydra agents at once; he can decimate legions of armed warriors solo... while talking on the phone; he's the only one to ever outwit Taskmaster, who literally has the power to predict his opponent's moves; and in one instance, he even murdered the ENTIRE Marvel Universe, including the supposedly unkillable Wolverine. “.....well damn,” muttered Rainbow Dash as she in the rest of the group were left wide eyed at Deadpool’s accomplishments. “But why would he kill everyone?” muttered Fluttershy. “Oh don’t worry that was a different Marvel universe!” cheered Pinkie Pie, much to the group confusion which only grew greater when the tv froze and Deadpool himself popped on screen. “Ya! Don't worry, that was just a 'What if?' scenario. Besides, I killed that downer of an alternate self anyway so no worries!” cheered the merc with the mouth before disappearing off screen and letting the tv start working again. “D-did he just…?” Asked a terrified Twilight, who was trying to process what just happened. Starlight just shook her head and gave her friend/teacher a flat look. “Let’s just keep watching the show.” (Thank ya! shinigamisparda) Wiz: He did this with the sword made of Carbonadium, an alloy capable of nullifying healing factors. In other words, he cheated. “That's just cheap. Seriously…” Applejack rolled her eyes. “Meh i’ve seen way cheaper tricks in comics than that,” said Spike while giving the farm pony a shrug. “SEE! Barney the dinosaur understands what i did wasn’t the biggest ass pull in comic history, that honor belongs to superman comics!” cheered Deadpool as he popped on screen again just to disappear a second later leaving the group confused again. Boomstick: He survived skyscrapers collapsing on top of him, having his heart ripped out, his head blown to bits, and even his entire body melted into a puddle. Wiz: But his regeneration is also responsible for one of his greatest downfalls. This power has trained him to think he's invincible and so he becomes quite careless in battle. “That can be dangerous… thinking you're invincible can lead to you underestimating your opponent…” Starlight stated, getting some nods of agreement from her friends. Boomstick: And that just of his extreme ADHD hasn't already put him to a bind. Wiz: Yet there are few more deadly than the Regenerating Degenerate. Really, Deadpool finally accomplished his dream of becoming the next great superhero. Strength & Feats Navigated an obstacle course meant for Iron Man-like suits unscathed Completely regenerated from a single hand Sole person to outwit Taskmaster Can dodge point-blank machine guns Killed the Marvel universe Casually battled Red Hulk Once became a Herald of Galactus NOT GARBAGE TIER IN MARVEL VS CAPCOM 3 Deadpool: Aw, that's sweet of you guys! Wanna see me naked? Wiz: Wait, what? No, no, no--! Deadpool shows them his naked frame from the comic, scarring them from the disturbance. “MY EYES! MY EYES ARE BURNING! TURN IT OFF, TURN IT OFF, TURN IT OFF!!!” screamed Rainbow Dash as she tried to claw out her eyes. The rest of the group was not faring any better as most of the group was looking a little green from the image of a naked Deadpool… well except Rarity surprisingly. “I don’t judge a pony on their physical appearance if they can’t help it,” said Rarity. Showing she wasn’t as shallow as some thought she was. Boomstick: (groaning) Agh, my eyes! Can't...claw them out...fast enough...! Deadpool: Aaand now you're scarred for life. Let's see my competition. “Screw you man!” screamed Rainbow Dash. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ After the annalisis, most of the group liked the superhero wannanbe with Rainbow saying she would vote for him. Pinkie and Spike would also vote for him with the former being somewhat reluctant. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Deathstroke (*Cues: Inhospitable Island/Deathstroke - Arrow*) (DP: HAHAHA TINY PIC!) Wiz: In the history of the DC universe, there has never existed a more lethal tactician and soldier than Slade Joseph Wilson. After illegally joining the U.S. military at the age of 16, he fought in Korea for years where his skill earned the attention of an experimental serum program and the lovely Captain Adeline Kane. “Wait a sec, that sounds familiar.” said Applejack with a raised Brow. Boomstick: This is sounding suspiciously like the origin story of Captain America. “Oh, right.” Applejack sid with a nod. (the avenger). Wiz: Slade actually gets the girl. Boomstick: Oh never mind! But does he steal cars? Wiz: Probably. Slade completely mastered every fighting style under Adeline's tutelage in record time. (*Cues: Unknown Theme*) Wiz: Apparently, this impressed her so much, they were married with a kid on the way in mere months. “Awwww!” Most of the group gushed at the sight of a Slade and Adeline together. Boomstick: Now that's my kind of woman! "Oh, you're a badass? No roses! No dates! Let's fight people, get married, and plow." “And just like his marriage, Boomstick just ruined the moment….” said Rarity with a flat tone. (*Cues: Arrow - Deathstroking / Creating an Army With a Needle*) Boomstick: Feeling pretty fucking great about life. Slade volunteered for an experiment that would help him resist enemy truth serums. Everything went exactly as planned... Panels of Deathstroke lashing out appear along with the sounds of screaming and shattering glass. Boomstick: You'd think these guys would've learned by now. “You'd really think they would huh?” asked Starlight said in agreement. Background Real Name: Slade Joseph Wilson Height: 6'4"/1.93 m Weight: 225 lbs/102 kg Alternate Alias: The Terminator Known for terrorizing a certain group of teenage superheroes Will shoot children in the knee point blank using a shotgun Has yet to be accurately portrayed outside of his comics (*Cues: Injustice: Gods Among Us - Main Theme*) Wiz: Wouldn't you know it, the injection did not have the effects they were looking for. But instead of ruining his life forever, the experiment accidentally transformed Slade into the deadliest assassin in the world. A Terminator if you will... which begs the question: what on Earth does the U.S. military think is in truth serums? “Now THERE'S something I'd like to know…” Twilight mumbled. Boomstick: Slade rose as a new man known to the world as Deathstroke. A picture of Deathstroke is shown, but it has a top hat, monocle, mustache, and "LOL!" drawn on it by Deadpool to make fun of his opponent. “Pfft! Okay, now that's kind of funny!” Rainbow giggled. Wiz: Really? Deadpool appears on screen. Deadpool: Don't forget to like, fav, and subscribe! (as Curly from the Three Stooges) Whoop, whoo-oo, whoop! Deadpool then runs off, causing the whole group to burst out laughing. (*Cues: Deathstroke's Theme - Batman: Arkham Origins*) Boomstick: Deathstroke is nearly superhuman. He can hit harder, run faster, react quick, and push himself longer than an Olympic athlete. Plus, he can use 90% of his brain, unlike the average 10%. Wiz: Come on! If we really only used 10% of our brains, we'd be about as dumb as sheep! Boomstick: You're a sheep! “You’re an idiot.” Rarity deadpanned. Wiz: What's important here is that Deathstroke's mind can process information nine times more efficiently than an ordinary man. He can think quicker, hear better, and see faster -- God dammit, that's not a real thing! “What?! AGAIN! That's the stupidest thing I have ever heard!!” yelled Twilight as she Goes on a rant. Boomstick: Ooh! We should put him and Captain America into a staring contest! Wiz(Twilight): *groans* He also has a healing factor, which can repair any part of his body... even if his brain is blown to smithereens. (the avenger) Boomstick: Bringing him back from the dead. Abilities Enhanced mind Blazingly fast reaction times Nine times the normal processing speed Enhanced body Superior strength, speed, and durability Adaptive healing factor Mastery in boxing, jiujitsu, karate, ninjutsu, and sword fighting Extensive knowledge of battle tactics (*Cues: Unknown Theme*) Wiz: Unfortunately, life back home was rough for Slade. His abilities were put to the test when his son was kidnapped by a group of rival mercenaries. Despite a successful rescue, his son lost the ability to speak. “Poor boy,” Fluttershy, Rarity and Applejack said sadly. Boomstick: So his ungrateful wife lashed out in rage and Slade was never the same. Wiz: Literally. A picture of Adeline pointing a gun at Deathstroke is shown before blacking out with a gunshot sound. “Ouch,” everyone said, closing their eyes in shock before opening them again to see Slade wearing an eyepatch. Boomstick: But he's one step closer to his secret dream of becoming a pirate. Question, Wizard: If he has a healing factor, how come he's still missing that eye? Wiz: Well no one knows, Boomstick, but perhaps not even a healing factor can repair the deepest of emotional wounds. “That doesn't make any sense!” Twilight snapped. Boomstick: Oh that's bullshit! Wiz: Despite his new lack of depth perception, Deathstroke remained as skilled as ever. Boomstick: Partially thanks to his favorite gear. I'm talkin' dual machine guns, a sniper rifle, and a super bomb... Wiz: Which is actually just a glorified flashbang grenade with trace bits of Kryptonite. Guess who that's for? Deadpool shows up again. Deadpool: The guy who fought Goku in one of the most biased fanboy videos ever! Wiz: Shut up, Wade! Deadpool: Okay, Ben! Boomstick: This is just getting weird. Spike groaned. “Tell me about it!” Deadpool drops off-screen. (*Cues: Unknown Theme*) Boomstick: So back to the weapons. Deathstroke prefers his sweet Thundercat-style sword and laser-shooting energy lance. Also, he's got an awesome suit of armor, made up of Kevlar and Nth metal. Wiz: Oh look! Yet another fictional alloy that's stronger and lighter than titanium! “No need to get grouchy, Wiz.” lectured Twilight. (the avenger) Wiz:Also, he has armor composed of promethium. Boomstick: Well my shirt is made up of "Boomstick-ium". “Yeah, and my house is made of "Cloud-ium,” snarked Rainbow dash. “My hat is made of "Apple-ium". Joked Applejack. “*giggles* And my party cannon is made of "Party-ium"!” laughed Pinkie Pie. Boomstick: See? I(RAP:We) can make up alloys too, writers. Wiz(Twilight): Actually, Boomstick(Twilight: Rainbow, AJ, Pinkie), promethium is a real thing. Boomstick/RAP: Oh, come on! (by The avenger.) Wiz: Though in real life, it's a chemical used in atomic batteries to power guided missiles and spacecrafts. But in comic book land, it's not that at all. It can absorb energy, is incredibly strong, and is self-regenerative. Boomstick: Wait, so his suit has a healing factor too? So, does like his zipper try and close itself when he wants to take a leak? Because that's horrifying. I mean I remember when I got my junk stuck in the toaster... “Too much information!” screech Rarity with burning cheeks. Nearly blowing everyone's eardrums out. Weapons & Armor Dual machine guns Sniper rifle Promethium sword Energy lance Fires a concussive laser blast Super Bomb A very expensive flash grenade designed to keep Superman at bay Armor Partially composed of Nth metal Slightly enhances strength and speed (*Cues: Teen Titans - Robin vs. Slade*) Wiz: With his impressive skills and arsenal, Deathstroke has defeated dozens of ninjas at once, survived an exploding nuclear submarine, and took down most of the Justice League by himself. Boomstick: He's also really good at push-ups. Shows the footage of Deathstroke in his cell room doing some push-ups. Wiz: Uh...how many push-ups can he do? Boomstick: All of them. “Why do I suddenly have the urge to work out?” Spike mumbled. Wiz: Despite multiple members of the Justice League agreeing he's the best tactician on the planet, Deathstroke is known for violent outbursts of rage when in extreme pain. Depending on who he's fighting, this can make him even more dangerous. “Though i doubt going berserk on somepony is a smart idea…” said Starlight. “Tell that to one of the fighters you girls will be watching in the future.” said Wade as he yet again broke the 4th wall just to mess with our heroes. (DP: can we really call a group of ponies watching tv heroes… wait did i just do a 4th-wall break inside a 4th-wall break!? That's like, 16 walls!) (ME: damn it wade stop destroying my stories walls!) (DP: HA! Like that'll ever happen Ju- Me: Don’t say my fucking name dumbass! DP: fine! Geez i’ll just go and troll some candy colored horses…) Strength & Feats Downed 38 men in under 2 minutes Had his brains shot out, came back to life just hours later Beat most of the Justice League Decisively defeated Batman in a hand-to-hand fight Agile enough to elude Superman Can see at a subatomic level Able to kick down a reinforced steel door with ease Boomstick: "Deathstroke doesn't just solve problems. He terminates them." Deathstroke: I am the thing that keeps you up at night. (picks up the downed Robin) The evil that haunts every dark corner of your mind. I will never rest... and neither will you. “..... well i’m not sleeping tonight.” said Rainbow Dash. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ With that done, Twilight and Starlight both agreed that Deathstroke would get their votes. The others just sat back to watch the upcoming battle. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Wiz: Alright the combatants are set let's end this debate once and for all. Boomstick:It's time for a Death Battle! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Death Battle Scene starts at the set of traffic lights along with vehicles coming in different directions, the camera then cuts to the bus stop with the poster of Deathstroke with a $5,000,010 bounty, then pans next to the bounty poster of Deadpool's with a $5,000,000 bounty. The two mercenaries are observing the poster of the latter. “Oh this is going to be stupid,” muttered Twilight. “More like stupidly AWESOME!” laughed Rainbow Dash. Deadpool: PFFT! What a rip! Seriously, what makes this chump worth 10 bucks more than me? C'mon! I'm me! *chuckles* What!? Am I right? “Ya… sure.” joked Rarity while rolling her eyes. Deathstroke: ... "And it seems Mr. slade agrees,” joked Fluttershy with a giggle. Deadpool: Yeah, I am. I'm pretty sure. “Ya sure?” said Applejack with a chuckle. (Deadpool and Deathstroke realize they are next to each other and somersault backwards.) (*Cues: Strongest Iron Arena- Tekken Tag Tournament 2*) Deathstroke: It's your lucky day. (pulls out his machine guns) I can show you. Deadpool: Oh, boy! A show? (pulls out his machine guns) Can I get popcorn first? I hope they have salt and pepper shakers. I love them to be tasty. “Yum!” said Pinkie Pie likking her lips. Instead of the announcer saying "FIGHT!", Deadpool says it directly at the viewers. Both combatants shoot at each other with their Machine Gun deflecting each one of their bullets. Deadpool: BANG! BANG! BANG! B-B-B-BANG. “He’s not taking this seriously is he?” Twilight asked, her eye twitching. “Nope,” Pinkie said, her eyes narrowing just slightly. In slow motion at Deadpool's side comes 5 bullets, and came another from Deathstroke's side, bouncing off in opposite sides, then it switches to normal speed, where they keep on firing until both combatants run out of ammo. “Well that defies all logic,” muttered Starlight. Deadpool: Uh-Oh! Deadpool drops his machine guns Deathstroke pulls out two ammo clips from his armor to reload, only to realize that Deadpool has disappeared, wondering where he has gone to. Deadpool teleports behind him and kicks him. Deadpool: BAMF! Deadpool beats Deathstroke while continuously teleporting, and Deathstroke drops his machine guns as well. Deadpool: BAMF! Shoryuken! BAMF! “Did he just steal Ryu’s move!?” asked Rainbow Dash, “Eyup,” answered Applejack. Deadpool leaps into the air in slow mo, poised to kick. Deadpool: Check out this rad air! Deathstroke gets kicked in the stomach, and lands on the ground, pulling out his energy lance. Deadpool lands on the ground. Deadpool: A Donatello fan, huh? (takes out his twin katanas) I was always more of a Leonardo guy myself. Although, I think most people would pin me more as a Michelangelo, you know that's them labelling-- “I understood that reference!” said Twilight with a smile when Deadpool mentioned the ninja turtles. ( by SuperSonicHeroes ) Deathstroke hits him with his staff. Deadpool: (distorted groan)I will not be labelled! “Says every SJW ever,” muttered Pinkie Pie. The combatants continue fighting. Deadpool: No touchy-feely! "but i like touchy feely!" whined Pinkie Pie. They fight until Deadpool is knocked far back by Deathstroke's Bo staff, but recovers his landing. Deathstroke goes after Deadpool. Deadpool: BAMF! *teleports* Let's do this! Deadpool continues fighting Deathstroke, but Deathstroke gains the advantage, and he continually hits and beats up Deadpool. Deadpool: (yelps) OW! OW! OH, MY KIDNEY! “Who says that while getting the stuffing kicked out of them?” questioned Starlight on Deadpool’s odd behavior. Deadpool escapes and teleports into the air. Deadpool: Comin' at ya! Deadpool attacks him in midair, but Deathstroke breaks his katanas with his staff. Deadpool teleports away to the side of a road, realizing his swords are broken, but Deathstroke chases him again. Deadpool: I gotta say, It's kinda an honor to get the snot beaten out of me by you of all people. Bruises aside, of course. “Ya keep talkin, that’s sure to help your situation,” snarked Applejack. Deathstroke: Let's see what kind of mark this leaves on you. Deathstroke shoots a laser out of his lance, piercing through Deadpool's stomach and knocking him onto the road and he gets hit by a oncoming truck. “Hissss… ouch,” muttered the group after seeing that string of misfortune. Deadpool: ACK! (his wound heals quickly from his regenerative healing factor) *talks to truck driver* Hey buddy! Don't let me slow you down! “Welp that poor guys scared for life,” joked Spike though he did feel bad for the driver for seeing something like that. Deadpool teleports on top of the truck. Deadpool: Where is that son of a gun? I'm gonna show him what for, I swear--- Deadpool is shot straight through the head. Deadpool(mostly everyone in the group): OOoooh, SHIT! (*Cues: FF7: Advent Children - The Chase of Highway*) Deathstroke is revealed to have his sniper rifle, and he reloads. Deadpool lands on windshield again. Deadpool: *talks to the truck driver again* Look at me, LOOK AT ME! Do not slow down! “Shouldn’t it be the opposite?” Applejack asked confused. “Who cares, it’s just getting good,” Rainbow said excitedly. Deadpool teleports on top of truck again. Deathstroke shoots and misses Deadpool while he keeps teleporting closer, even moving to the other side of the bridge at one point. Deadpool: MISSED ME! *Makes Zoidberg sounds*(Teleporting with each syllable until he's behind Deathstroke) I! HATE! YOUR! DUMBFACE! Deathstroke punches Deadpool. Deadpool: OH, MY KIDNEY! “But he hit you in the face Mr. Deadpool,” corrected Fluttershy. Deadpool is repeatedly punched and kicked until he goes down, Deathstroke then pulls out his sword. Deadpool: Oh! Is it swordfight time? Good thing I carry spares! Deadpool and Deathstroke continue fighting. Deadpool parries Deathstroke. Deadpool: Guess it's cutting time! Deadpool continuously slashes Deathstroke, but his armor and healing factor leave him unscathed. Deathstroke gains the upper hand, shoots Deadpool in the face several times with his pistol, and breaks Deadpool's spare katanas. Deathstroke: If you spent half as much time concentrating as you do talking, perhaps you would be less predictable. Deadpool: OH YOU'RE KIDDING ME! I'M PREDICTABLE!? “Oh no! He's triggered!” screamed Pinkie Pie in fright. (the avenger.) Deadpool reaches and pulls out a boombox, hits play and it plays Marvel vs Capcom 3 - Deadpool's Theme. Deadpool somehow changed his clothes in a split second from his signature red and black jumpsuit to sweats with chains and a DEADPOOL headband. “What…” muttered Twilight. “The…” continued Starlight in a similar State of confusion. “Fuck!?” finished and scream Rarity as everyone (minus Pinkie) tried to process how did he just do that. Deadpool: Don't worry girls! I'm just getting warmed up! “Did he just change the dialogue of the show just to mention us!?” screamed Twilight, her brain nearly giving out because of the strain it was going through trying to understand what was going on. (by the Avenger. Also please don’t get angry if i slightly change more of Deadpool's lines to fit a joke or two.) As he starts dancing around, a special effects surrounds him making it more flashy and people are cheering from the foreground. Deathstroke: *groan* “Ok this is just getting ridiculous,” sighed Twilight. “But again still so awesome!” cheered Rainbow dash as she bobbed her head to the song. Deadpool still breakdances while dodging all of Deathstroke's attacks and hitting him with break dance moves. “He’s styling all over his balls!” screamed Pinkie Pie. “What balls?” asked an innocent Fluttershy. Deadpool: *sings* Splick splick, Dynamite! (moonwalks) He's coming for me, Watch the fight! As Deadpool keeps on dancing, an annoyed Deathstroke shoots the bus' tires with his pistol, causing it to skid and cause hundreds of car crashes. Both combatants stagger. “Oh dear that can’t be good…” whispered Fluttershy. (*Cues: FF7: Advent Children - The Chase of Highway again*) Deadpool teleports just as a car flies towards both him and Deathstroke while Deathstroke dodges it Vans and cars kept crashing. Deadpool, who now is back in his old clothes and had dual pistols, and Deathstroke both leap off two different vehicles towards each other. The truck tips over while the combatants fight in mid-air and then land on the side of the school bus, still in midair. They continue to fight, evenly matched, until Deadpool holds a gun to Deathstroke's head, which ends in Deathstroke wildly slashing Deadpool. “Oh that’s gotta hurt,” hissed out Rarity. Deadpool: OW!OW!OW!MY OTHER LUNG!OW!OW!OW! (Gets impaled through the chest) MY SPLEEN! (Gets shot in the back of the head and sent flying) MY LEG! (Hits a car) OH! IT'S CRAMPING! “WHY IS YOUR LEG CRAMPING A MORE PRESSING MATTER!?” screamed Twilight, finally losing her cool with the the red merc. Deathstroke cuts the car in half causing an explosion. He then realizes his sword is missing after the explosion. Deadpool teleports in front of Deathstroke and stabs him with his own sword. “......how?” asked Starlight. Wondering how did the merc with the mouth get the sword without Deathstroke noticing. Deadpool: Pop-Pop, waton Deathstroke... (Truck towards into Deadpool) God Dammit! (Gets hit) OH MY THIRD LUNG! “Huh well what do you know? A flaming semi truck,” mussed Twilight with a small hint of mirth in her voice. Truck explodes, and extreme effects like a Michael Bay's film. An unconscious Deathstroke is seen, as is Deadpool, who is unfazed by the damage, and he gets up revealing that he's missing an arm. “It still gets to me that he can just shrug that kind of damage off like nothing,” said Applejack. Rainbow Dash just rolled her eye’s trying to she wasn't impressed (DP: she was.) “oh please! It’s not that impressive heck if i was in that situation i would-!” “Be laying on the ground dying.” Interrupted Fluttershy of all ponies, and saying it with a dry tone to bute! Much to the shock of her friends. “... oh damn!” yelled Pinkie Pie. Deadpool: Well, that escalated quickly. You might want to lay low for a couple of days... you are, pretty much responsible for a mass murder. Deadpool puts his limb back on while Deathstroke, who is missing his mask, gained consciousness with his own sword in his chest. Deathstroke: *woozy groan* Deadpool: *laughs* (mocking) It's a Deathstroke kabob! *laughs* While he was pointing at Deathstroke mockingly, he just realized that he put in his leg on the upper arm and his arm attached to the thigh by mistake. “EW.” said Rarity in disgust. “Pfft! Now thats funny,” laughed Rainbow Dash. Deadpool: Whoops! Hang on, give me a sec. Oh this is going to hurt! (groaning) Deadpool attaches his limbs in the correct places while Deathstroke pulls his sword out of his chest, then struggles to get up. Deathstroke: *pained groan* Deadpool: Whoa, hold on! You heal fast too? I got something special for that! (*Cues: Sword Art Online - Swordland Theme*) As Deathstroke finally gets on his feet, Deadpool pulls out his last sword. Deadpool: Carbonadium Sword! Murdering all your pesky Wolverines and Saberteeth since 2012! Good year for cinema! “It truly was,” agreed Pinkie Pie with a nod. The combatants fight once more, once again evenly matched. While their swords are locked Deadpool points his pistol at Deathstroke's face. Deadpool: (to the fourth wall warning for a graphic scene) All the children in the audience (that includes you, flame breath), cover your eyes! “Why should- HEY!!” yelled Spike as Twilight covered his eye’s. “Thank you, Twibright.” thanked Deadpool. “It’s Twilight!” screamed a annoyed Twilight. “Pfft that’s such a dumb name… anyway back to the show.” said Deadpool Deadpool shoots through his own wrist and nails Deathstroke in his good eye. Deathstroke staggers while swinging his sword wildly. Deadpool teleports behind Deathstroke and cuts him, and Deathstroke falls. (*Screen blacks out*) Deathstroke: (deep voice) And the moral of the story is… “What the-” muttered most of the group because they were sure Deadpool was the one who won this battle. Deadpool reveals himself puppeteering Deathstroke's head. “OH SICK!” screamed Rainbow Dash while everyone else was turning green from seeing Deadpool using Slade’s head as a toy. Deadpool: (normal voice) *gasps* Deadpool wins! YAY! Explosions are heard, while Deadpool sings Macarena while replacing two lines. Deadpool (replacing lines): This is totally racist. HEYYY CHIMICHANGAAAAAAA! (Chomping Noise) Announcer: K.O! While Deadpool is driving a sweet ride, on that hood, it has Deathstroke's dismembered head as a hood ornament. “Well so much for respecting the dead,” muttered Starlight with a flat look. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Results (*Cues: CJuicy - Macarena (Moombathon Remix)*) Deadpool appears on-screen. Deadpool: (faking) Oh! Oh, YouTube comments. Oh, I see you rolling. Oh, you're hating. Oh, it wounds me so... (unfazed) it doesn't at all. Explain how I beat this asshole. “Wow he’s even a smartass with the audience,” said Applejack said with a flat look. Wiz: Don't tell me how to do my job. *clears throat* This was a surprisingly even match. Though Deathstroke was the superior fighter of the two and had the better armor, Deadpool could take all his punishment and give just as much. “True,” everyone agreed. Boomstick: Deathstroke's smart, so normally he would have no problem predicting his opponent's moves, but Deadpool is so unpredictable, not even Taskmaster, or sometimes even himself for that matter, can keep up with whatever he's doing. “There was just no possible way to plan ahead for him,” Twilight summarized. Wiz: Unfortunately for Deathstroke, he didn't have the means to put Deadpool down for good. And while Deathstroke's healing factor was perfect for repairing damage, Deadpool's trumped his by being capable of replacing entire organs at a much faster rate. Sometimes the original isn't always the best. Boomstick: Deadpool is just a cut above the rest. Wiz: The winner is... Deadpool pops in victoriously to finish the last sentence. Deadpool: Spider-Man! I mean Deadpool! Shit! Everyone laughed at this and a few even fell off the couch laughing. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ No trailer for this one. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Before the ponies and dragon could move, the world froze and turned to gray as Deadpool walked into the scene as he held a clipboard in his hands. Turning to the viewers, he said, “I’m just gonna make this quick. So after the battle, all the girls and dragon boy cheered as they got cool things from the box. Naturally they were of yours truly so that’s bound to make anyone happy.” He flips a page over and says, They talk about the results, the awesome fight and how awesome I am. Thanks Skittle pony. Now onto the Ending scene hit it!” ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ later that night, ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ It was nighttime as Twilight tried to get some rest but it proved to be difficult. The craziness and insanity that was called Deadpool was making her toss and turn in her bed as she tried to calm down. “Twibright,” a voice said slowly. The princess of friendship didn’t want to listen to anything. She just wanted to forget about the illogical superhero and sleep. “Twibright,” the voice said slightly louder. “What?” Twilight said sleepily as she opened her eyes. She thought it was Starlight asking for something or Spike telling her she got a letter from the princess. What she wasn’t expecting was a familiar red and black suited hero to be laying beside her merely a foot away from her. “Hiiii,” Deadpool said, waving to the princess happily. That night, Ponyville found out that Twilight could use the Canterlot voice to wake up all the residents and break all the windows at the same time. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ CHAPTER END! NEXT TIME KIRBY VS MAJIN BUU. Kirby VS Majin BuuWe find most of our heroes gathered in the castle. They had hoped to see another episode of Death Battle, but when Rainbow Dash and the rest of the group entered the castle they quickly noticed both the eerie silence and the absence of Twilight, Spike, and Starlight. “Uhhhh girls? Is it just me or does the place seem kinds empty to y'all?” asked Applejack as they made their way down the hall leading to entertainment room, or the super awesome room of fight, and snacks…. Rainbow and Pinkie’s words not her’s. “I agree Applejack it is quite ominous and is it just me or do i hear… crying?” asked Rarity as she and the rest of the group made their way down towards the their destination. Once the group made it towards the sound which lead them to one of the many rooms. Opening the door, the small group of ponies found their friend Twilight on the ground crying with Spike and Starlight comforting her. This confused the girls as Applejack asked, “What’s going on here?” “That’s what I’d like to know,” a gentle voice said from behind the five ponies. The small group of friends turned around and were greeted by Princess Celestia, Luna and Prince Blueblood stand there with confused expressions. “Your highness,” the ponies, minus Starlight and Twilight, said as they bowed respectfully. “Come now, none of that,” Celestia said as the ponies rose back to their hooves. “Now can some explain what’s going on?” Celestia asked, concerned for her former student’s condition. “We just found her like this, Celestia,” Rarity said truthfully. “Also if I may be bold to ask, why are you and the prince here?” Rarity asked, slightly glaring at the prince. “To answer your question Miss Rarity, I came with my aunts to see this show they’ve been going on about. But most importantly, I wanted to see my old friend since we haven’t talked in awhile,” Blueblood said, looking over Rarity to see Twilight still crying. “Wait, you and Twilight were friends?” Rainbow Dash asked, shocked by this. “We’re still friends, we used to be playmates when we were younger,” Blueblood said as another sob escaped from Twilight. “This reminds me of the time Twilight thought you were going to send her to magic kindergarten,” Blueblood said causing Celestia to giggle at the memory. “I must say, I’m a bit surprised,” Rarity said, looking at the prince with a neutral look. “Why’s that Rarity? What’s got you surprised?” Luna said, taking a step forward to look at the group. The very next moment Twilight out an audible sob as Pinkie hopped towards her sad friend. “Well it’s just that when we met at the Gala, Prince Blueblood was…,” Rarity began to say as said prince sighed. “I know Miss Rarity, you don’t have to remind me. It was a bad day for me and I’m generally not much of a social butterfly, for that I apologize for how i acted that day,” Blueblood said remorsefully, bowing to the fashionista. Rarity stared at the prince with her mouth opened slightly, unable to form any words. It took her a second to remember that the princesses and her friends were watching her so she cleared her throat and said, “Apology accepted, Prince Blueblood.” At that moment Spike popped up between the two, giving the Prince a dark glare. “I'm watching you…” He whispered darkly. “Well that’s fine and dandy but can we get back at the matter at hoof. Twi’s still crying over there,” Applejack said, pointing at the downed mare as Pinkie tried making funny faces to cheer her up. “What can we do? It doesn’t seem like Pinkie is having much luck,” Fluttershy said, seeing that the lavender princess still hasn’t moved. She then saw Celestia walk towards her fellow princess as Pinkie stopped doing Pinkie things. “Don’t worry Pinkie. I know just what to do,” Celestia said, getting close to the crying mare. “Oh Oh. Are you gonna use a spell? Maybe a potion to make all the sadness go away?” Pinkie said, hoping place. “No, just an old family technique,” Celestia said, standing next to Twilight as she raised her hoof. The group watched with baited breathe at what Celestia would do. *SMACK* And were surprised to see the sun princess smack Twilight upside the head. “Owowow. Who hit me?” Twilight said, jumping to her hooves and looking around. “It was Celestia,” Spike and Starlight said simultaneously. “Wait, Celestia hit me?” Twilight yelled, wincing in pain. “I’m sorry Twilight but you were crying for some reason. I had to do something to snap you out of it,” Celestia said sadly. “Oh, thank you Celestia. So did you and Luna come by for another episode?” Twilight asked, walking with her former teacher to the hall. “Yes and we also brought an old friend of yours,” Celestia said, motioning towards Blueblood. Twilight’s eyes went wide as she ran towards Blueblood and hugged him. Blueblood was caught off guard but returned the hug a moment later as the girls watched with smiles on their faces. “Oh It’s good to see you, Blue,” Twilight said happily. “I could say the same to you, Princess Twilight,” Blueblood said teasingly as he released the hug. “While this is touching and heartwarming, I say we go to the viewing room to watch the episode,” Luna said, walking towards the viewing room. “I agree. After hearing about this show for months, I’ve been interested in seeing it myself,” Blueblood said, following Luna as the rest of the group walked. Once in the room, everyone took a seat as Twilight levitated the remote to her. She was just about to press play when Rarity said, “I just thought of something. If you’re here with us then who’s watching over Canterlot?” ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Meanwhile in Canterlot~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ “This injustice will not stand. I will not sit by and let the people suffer by the hands of these foul creatures!” screamed Thor (pony form.) as he sat on Celestia’s throne. “Um sir. We appreciate that you’re helping the princess with the day court but don’t you think your taking the situation a bit too far,” a nervous guard said as he held a spear in his hooves. “Ya you're blowing the matter out of proportion,” agreed another guard as they tried to calm down their princess’s mate “No! These foul creatures have been eating the crops of the loyal ponies of this land and I won’t stand for it!” Thor yelled, stomping his hoof on the ground and making the castle shake from the shock. “Sir! It's just a gopher problem at a local farm!” scream the first Guard. “WE STRIKE AT WITHIN THE HOUR!” Thor yelled, spreading his wings while raising his hammer into the air. As he did that, lightning seemed to come out of nowhere behind the pony god of thunder. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Back with the Gang~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ “...... ya everything is fine,” said a confident Celestia, and with that out of the way everyone got in their seats and Twilight pressed play. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ (*Cues: Invader - Peter Scaturro & Bryan Kei Mantia*) Wiz: Imagine right now, what does the apocalyptic destroyer of worlds look like? “Tirek?” Twilight mused. “A comic book villain made real?” asked Spike. “A mad cult leader going back in time?” added Starlight. “A mad, tyrant king with horrible fashion sense?” said Rarity in fear. “A monster made of pears?” asked Applejack with a raised brow? “An ultimate storm that can't be controlled?” Rainbow Dash with a hint of fear. “A *gulps* d-d-drag-gon god who eats ponies?” whimpered Fluttershy while hugging Doomguy Plushie. “A party pooper?” gasped out Pinkie Pie. (all but twilight's line was by the avenger) “Something from our past,” muttered Celestia while Luna gently patted her shoulders. “Someone who could hurt my aunt’s and cousin’s,” muttered Blue Blood. Boomstick: Stop thinking, because you're wrong. It's these pudgy pink terrors. Kirby, Nintendo's floating puff-ball of never-ending cheer and dreams. “Awww~ He's so cute~! I bet he wouldn't hurt anypony.” cooed Fluttershy. Wiz: And Majin Buu, the most vicious monster in the Dragonball Universe. “Seriously!? Those weird-looking blobs of pink!?” yelled a surprised Rainbow Dash. “AHEM!” Pinkie coughed. “You don't count, you're not evil!” Dash retorted. Boomstick: He's Wiz and I'm Boomstick. Wiz: And it's our job to analyze their weapons, armor, and skills to find out who would win... a Death Battle. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Kirby (*Cues: Kirby - King Dedede Battle/Gourmet Race (Orchestral Remix)*) Wiz: Over a thousand years ago, an epic war waged throughout the universe. The legendary Star Warriors battled against the vile Nightmare for the freedom of everything that ever was. Ultimately, good prevailed, but at the cost of many, many lives. Yet one infant Star Warrior escaped the carnage, destined to awaken a millennium later and save the galaxy. His name... is Kirby... (*Record scratches*) Kirby: HIII! (*Cues: Green Greens - Kirby Super Star Ultra*) “So adorable,” squealed Fluttershy as she gushed over Kirby. Boomstick: Wait, what?! The cute cuddly pink puffball who lives in Happyland? Are you sure you're reading the right back story? “I have to agree with Mr. Boomstick on this one.” agreed Blue Blood. “Trust me Blue Blood you won’t be saying that for long…” muttered Rarity. Wiz: Yes. He crash landed on Popstar, the most confusingly-shaped planet ever… Twilight's eye twitched upon seeing the star-shaped planet. “How would gravity even work on a planet like that?!” “Twilight please we’ve been over this….” sighed Spike as he felt his mother figure was going to go on a rant again. “She still questioning every little thing?” asked Blue Blood. “Eyup,” answered Spike, Popping the p. “Heh seems like things never change,” laughed Blue Blood. Causing Twilight to blush in embarrassment.. Wiz:...and has been defending the kingdom of Dream Land ever since. Boomstick: But look at him! He's just so adorable and cuddly. He couldn't hurt a fly. “He seems more like he would rather be playing then actually fight anyone,” said Luna. Wiz: Kirby is a ravenous cannibal who thrives on the blood of mass murder. “..... bullshit,” said Rainbow Dash with a flat look. (we see see a field that is filled with the skeletal remains of a few cows.) Tiff : Did you do this? “I highly doubt he did that,” said Rarity. Not believing that kirby would something like that. (DM: she’s right you know.) (*Cues: Kirby Triple Deluxe - Kirby Fighters (Kracko) Boomstick (Pinkie and Rainbow Dash): Holy shit! Background Age: Unknown, 200 years pre-maturity Height: 8 in/20 cm Weight: Likely under 10 oz/283 g Species: Unknown Infant-like and cheerful demeanor A Star Warrior Citizen of Dream Land Wiz: He may not look it, but Kirby is a powerhouse. He possesses incredible strength, speed, durability and an arsenal stranger than an average day in Florida. “Well looks can be deceiving,” said Celestia. “Ya like cute little Flurry Heart being as powerful as a fully grown unicorn,” agreed Twilight. Boomstick: His trademark power is his inhale ability, which sucks almost everything in with a powerful vortex. With it, he can clear out everything from a quick meal to an acre of forest in a matter of seconds. “Sounds like Celestia when she's at an all you eat pastry buffet, she's banned from all of them by now I wager.” said Luna jokingly. Causing her sister to glare at her. “Luna! I am not banned from all you can eat buffets!” cried Celestia with her cheeks burning red. “Then why do the Mayor of Fillydelphia keep rejecting you attending their annual pie eating contest?” asked Twilight with a amused Smile. “Because I judged the mayor's wife's pie to taste like bull manure ten years ago.” defended Celestia. “And the 'No Princesses Allowed' signs I keep seeing outside those all you can eat places?” asked her sister. “That's Blueblood trying to keep me to my diet.” muttered Celestia. Blueblood gave his aunt a bright smile. “Indeed! Auntie needs to lay back on the amount of pastries she eats, they are bad for her blood pressure. Here Auntie, have some celery!” he said as he handed her some celery. Celestia glared at the offending piece of food. “ ...You are sooo going to regret this when my diet period ends.” she growled. Blueblood just gave her a shrug. “By then it will be my successor's problem so I call it a win!” “Ha! i was wrong about you after all nephew!” laughed Luna while patting her Nephew’s back. “Indeed... You are still a brutish dullard however.” laughed Rarity before giving him a playful punch on the shoulder. “And still scream like a girl.” Spike whispered, earning a few snickers from the group. (thank you Staadnauthursil) Wiz: Plus, Kirby's body is malleable, allowing him to stretch his mouth and inhale larger objects, though he does have trouble wrapping his mouth around extremely large and heavy things. Boomstick: LIKE MY DIC-! “DON'T YOU DARE FINISH THAT SENTENCE YOU FUCKING MULE!!!” screeched Rarity causing everyone else back away from the enraged unicorn. (thank ya Avenger) Wiz: -KIRBY weighs practically nothing, allowing him to inflate his body and fly like a sentient balloon. He can traverse the skies, and outer space, by using his own personal vehicle, the Warp Star. “That’s a sweet ride,” cheered Rainbow Dash as she got a good look at the warp Star. “Now that beats flying by magic,” whistled Starlight impressed with the pink hero’s ride. Boomstick: Which he can call up at any time on speed dial. No, really, he uses a cell phone. Somebody get me that number! I tried 1-800-PINK-RIDE, but it was something else.... “Oh… my…” Fluttershy blushed. Wiz: The Warp Star is Kirby's primary means of transportation through the universe, and can travel at speeds faster than light. It is forged of Kirby's own energy, so, while delicate, should it be destroyed, Kirby can easily create a new one on his own, making the cell phone kind of pointless. “I have to agree with Wiz on this one, that is pretty useless,” muttered Twilight, Boomstick: I'd be happy to take that phone off his hands, though I'm a bit iffy on standing anywhere near that star-driving balloon marshmallow. Look at him! (shows a scene of Kirby sucking up and enemy.) He doesn't even care! He's a monster! “Ok maybe they wearn’t bullshiting,” said a surprised Rainbow Dash. Arsenal Inhale Copy Ability Warp Star Flight Air Bullet Slide Kick Can Summon Helpers (*Cues: Super Smash Bros. Melee - Fountain of Dreams) Wiz: It's about to get even worse: guess what just happened to that poor creature? See, when Kirby swallows a victim, they don't exactly die. Turns out Kirby's stomach, is, in fact, an entirely separate and endless dimension of reality. “Just like my sister on cake day!” laughed Luna get some laughter from the rest of the group and a glare from said sister. Boomstick: So he never feels full. Talk about getting your money's worth at an all-you-can-eat-buffet, though. Luna was yet again going to say another joke but a seething death glare from Celestia (whose mane was now on fire) stopped her in her tracks. Wiz: Kirby can trap thousands of victims in this abyss. Then, he can actually enter his own stomach dimension and draw from his captive's power using his copy ability. Boomstick: How in the hell?! Does he, like, swallow himself? Wiz: He likely projects an astral image of himself within the dimension, which can act on the physical plain. “I… guess that makes sense?” Twilight mused to herself. Boomstick: Sure... Anyway, with the Copy ability, Kirby's form and power change based on what he's eating. By devouring an enemy with a mallet, he can become Hammer Kirby, a master of whack-a-mole! “Hmmmm i remember young sunset being good at that game… and anything that had to do with a hammer,” mused Blue Blood causing Celestia to smile at the memory. Wiz: Fire Kirby can unleash a torrent of flame and survive all manner of heat. Ice Kirby can freeze his foes solid. Wheel Kirby is fast enough to drive around the entire kingdom of Dream Land in under two seconds, though who knows how he can see where he's going. “Hahaha! He looks like a pink sonic when he’s in wheel form,” laughed Rainbow Dash. Boomstick: There's Mike Kirby, who singing talent is apparently so awful, everything that hears it dies. (We see Mike Kirby sing, causing several monsters to explode) “OH SWEET CELESTIA MAKE IT STOP!!” Spike screamed, covering his ears. “It’s worse than the time auntie Luna tried to sing modern music!” cried Blue Blood. “Hey!” yelled a ticked off Luna getting a laugh from her sister. “Sucks being on the receiving end huh?” laughed the sun princess. (*Cues: Arena Battle - Kirby's Return to Dreamland*) Boomstick: Like Wiz at karaoke night with the ladies. “Or Twilight when she scares away her dates,” Rainbow said, grinning. Wiz (and Twilight): Yea...HEY! (Thank you Avenger for the joke above) Everypony chuckled at this. Boomstick: Stone Kirby is nearly indestructible, and Sword Kirby is a master with a blade, he can even fire sword beams, which can cut through anything without mercy. DAMN! “I wanna sword like that!” Spike smiled. (*Cues: Final Battle EX - Kirby's Return to Dreamland*) Boomstick: But that's not all, he can pour a ton of energy into the blade, and make it grow into the powerful Ultra Sword. “That’s one powerful sword,” Rarity said as Blueblood nodded silently. Wiz: Fighter Kirby is a master martial artist, and by inhaling a Miracle Fruit, he becomes Hyper Nova Kirby, capable of devouring worlds. Last, but not least, by absorbing his own Warp Star, Kirby can create his ultimate weapon, the Star Rod, a magical staff powered by dreams and capable of destroying evil, and most of the moon. "WHAT!" screamed Luna in a primal rage but before she could do any harm her sister and Twilight were able to calm her down. Boomstick: The only problem with Kirby's copy ability is, they don't last. One bad hit, and there it goes. “So he's kind of a glass cannon?” Starlight added. Copy Abilities Sword Hammer Fighter Fire Ice Wheel Mike Hypernova Star Rod (*Cues: Boss Battle - Kirby's Return to Dreamland*) Wiz: But even without an added ability, Kirby is remarkably tough. He's powerful enough to crack a planet in half, fast enough to run on water, and strong enough to throw a monster thirty times his size, on a frying pan, all the way to the sun, circle the burning star, and return to Kirby's feet, with the perfectly cooked monster. “...WHAT!?” everyone screamed at that bit of info. “HOW?” Twilight, Starlight and Celestia said simultaneously. Boomstick: I think that might be the most ridiculous feat we've ever seen on Death Battle. But he's not just strong, he's so tough that he was barely fazed after being crushed under thousands of tons of pressure, and effortlessly survived an explosion massive enough to eclipse the entire world. “Wow that little guy is one tough guy,” said a amazed Rainbow Dash. Wiz: He's achieved all of this despite being only eight inches tall. Boomstick: See, it's not the size of the monster, it's how he throws a fucking humongus frying pan into the sun and back! “We're gonna keep comin' back ta that, aren't we?” muttered Applejack. Wiz: Well, Kirby does have one crucial flaw: he's a baby, and has yet to fully mature as a Star Warrior. “A BABY!?” everyone screamed, both surprise and terrified at the fact that one of the most dangerous creatures they have just heard about (and because of this show the list just keeps growing.) was just a baby. (thank ya shinigamisparda) Boomstick: Yeah, he's not too bright, so he's not gonna be whipping up any genius strategies mid-fight. Fortunately he's powerful enough to get away with it. Kirby is the most adorably terrifying thing in the world! Everyone's thoughts immediately turned to Flurry Heart and couldn't help but shiver at the similarities. “I’m worried for my cousin Cadence now,” muttered BlueBlood, hoping his Cousin would be ok. Strengths and Feats Cracked Planet Popstar in half Punched a hole through the Earth Threw Popon to the sun Obliterated Popstar in manga Destroyed Nova, who is planet-sized Defeated Nightmare and Dark Matter Redirected a meteor using simple cannonballs Kirby does his traditional ending dance while the Kirby Dance music from Kirby's Return to Dreamland plays. “Aw~ so cute!” Fluttershy giggled. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Once the analysis was done, everyone could agree that they were amazed by the infant star warrior.e “My bits are on the mini pink Celestia,” Luna exclaimed loudly. “LUNA,” Celestia yelled as the others snickered at the sisters. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Majin Buu (*Cues: Evil Buu - Dragon Ball Z*) Wiz: True terror is something unpredictable, unstoppable, and dreadfully deceiving. “Just like every comic book villain,” Rainbow Dash said, munching on some popcorn. “Or like the bad guys we fought in the past,” Fluttershy said quietly, eating a chocolate bar as her friends, even the princesses, agreed. Boomstick: A perfect description for the pink monstrosity known as Majin Buu. Majin Buu is a fat, pink, man-sized baby thing with enough power to destroy a planet. And I assume he's made of some sort of bubble gum. Probably Big League Chew. “MMMmmhhhnnn, gum,” Pinkie said, her mouth watering at the thought of gum that size. Wiz: Buu has existed since the dawn of time, but was only discovered five million years ago by the nefarious wizard, Bibidi. Bibidi released Majin Buu on a helpless universe, intent on destroying everything. After annihilating hundreds of planets, Bibidi set his sights on Earth, sending Buu ahead in a sealed capsule just waiting to be released. “Why do people always have to mess with ancient evil?” muttered Twilight with a face hoof. Boomstick: Buuuuut then Bibidi got himself killed before he could get to Earth and release the pink terror. But no worries, the weird lizard-wizard-thing had a back-up plan in the form of a magic clone named Babidi. Pinkie blinked. “Wait, clone? I thought he was his-” Boomstick: Yes, clone, not son, that was a mis-translation. “Oh.” said Pinkie Pie. Boomstick: So, Bibidi, Babidi and Buu. (*sings*) Put 'em all together and what do you get? Wiz: A Disney lawsuit… “HA!” Laughed Pinkie Pie. Background Age: Immemorial Height: (Fat) Approx. 6ft/183 cm, (Kid) Approx. 5ft/152 cm Race: Majin Aliases: Mr. Buu, Boo of Pure Evil, Majin of Destruction Originally thought to be created by Bibibdi Friends with Super Janemba Boomstick: Anyway, the doppelganger Babidi set out on a quest to recover Buu and complete Bibidi's plan. Wiz: Eventually, Babidi found Buu and opened the monster's shell. BUUUT turns out there was a... slight defect and Buu was... uummm… “Unstable?” Twilight asked, shrugging. “Crazy?” Spike asked, shrugging. “Scary?” Fluttershy asked, using Doomguy plushie as a shield. Boomstick: A complete idiot! Majin Buu: OHOHOHOHOHOOO! (*Cues: Buu's Theme - Dragon Ball Z*) (*Majin Buu hums and stretches his body after being sealed.*) Dabura: Is this the... The great Majin Buu? Are you positive? “Buu seems more harmless than dangerous ta me,” Applejack said, not believing he could be that much of a threat. “That's what we were saying about Kirby, then we saw what he can do,” Starlight said, pointing out how powerful the pink star warrior was. “Good point, but still…” Applejack began to say before Wiz cut her off. Wiz: Buu is the equivalent of a man-sized toddler with the power of a billion nuclear warheads. (*Buu kicks Dabura across land and into a cliff*) “WOAH!” everyone said, shocked at how powerful that kick was. “I take it all back,” Applejack (*Cues: Pink Demon - Dragon Ball Z*) Boomstick: Talk about your terrible twos. Buu has a ridiculous arsenal for killing worlds: he can fly, shoot lasers, destroy cities by breathing too hard, and can fire a beam from his head-penis that can turn people into candy. “Really?! I wonder if-” Pinkie said before Starlight and Twilight grab her hooves and glare at her. “Don't you fucking dare!” Twilight and Starlight said simultaneously. “Iwasn'tplanningtolookforaspellthatcanturnpeopleintocandy!PinkiePromise!” Pinkie said really fast and in one breathe. (Thanks to The Avenger to the jokes above) Wiz: Boomstick, it's not his genitals, its his.... well... actually, I don't know what it is. Which brings me to his strangest ability, his whole body in general. Whatever he's made of, its magic in nature. Buu's whole body can be pulled, stretched, or even ripped apart with no negative effects. Boomstick: He can even pull entire slabs from his belly and use his own flesh as a weapon. AAHH, this is just getting stranger and stranger. “Agreed. That is a rather strange ability,” Blueblood said, feeling a bit uncomfortable seeing Buu ripping off body fat like that. Everyone else was either shuddering or turning a bit green from that image. Wiz: Yes, and he apparently does feel pain, though it seems to please him. Like some sort of combat masochist. Fortunately, his body can regenerate almost instantly. Boomstick: He can be blasted to smithereens and reform himself in seconds. He's practically invincible. Arsenal Chocolate Beam Flight Gack Body Manipulation Regeneration Absorption Buu Rocket Super Breath Mending Beam Innocence Express Vanishing Beam Finger Beam Vice Shout Planet Burst Wiz: Buu can mimic any Ki attack after seeing it in action only once, this is how he learned Goku's Kamehameha wave, and Supreme Kai's Instantaneous Movement teleport. “To be able to use an attack after one look,” Applejack said, “To think something like Buu can be that powerful,” Rarity said, getting a bit pale. Wiz: But his copying prowess goes even further, he can physically absorb other people, transforming his mind and body. Buu: YES! COME TO ME! (absorbs Gotenks and Piccolo) Fluttershy raced to the bathroom quick and the group heard the sound of her throwing up. The others were faring a bit better than her but not by much as they too felt sick just by watching that. (*Cues: Majin Theme - Dragon Ball Z*) Boomstick (Spike and Rainbow Dash): That's the most disturbing thing I've ever seen. “No kidding,” Starlight said, shuddering as she tried to forget what just happened. “I think I’m gonna have nightmares tonight,” Twilight said, shuddering as well. Next to her Blueblood was curled up in a ball, shivering. “Can't sleep, Buu will eat me…” Wiz: Each version of Buu has a different personality, based on whom he's absorbed. Fat Buu is cheerful and childlike, due to absorbing the carefree Grand Supreme Kai, but then there's his original, and most dangerous form, Kid Buu. Boomstick: He's so tiny! He's like a little kid in MC Hammer pants! This can't seriously be his deadliest form. “After what we saw, I’m doubting that,” Rainbow said, looking at the smaller Buu. “I believe we can all agree with that,” Luna said, getting shaky nods from everyone in the room. Wiz: Kid Buu is pure rage incarnate. (*Cues: Panic - Dragon Ball Z*) Kid Buu screams out loud and pounds on his chest. Wiz: He can get so angry, he's capable of tearing holes in the fabric of reality just by screaming. "He can what takes ponies like Starswirl years to do by just throwing a tantrum?" whispered Twilight in complete horror. Boomstick: Or, if he's fed up with whatever planet he's on, he'll just blow it to bits with his Planet Burst attack. Everyone’s eyes grew wide at the size of the Planet Burst attack. They didn’t want to be on the receiving end of that and even the elder princesses felt that they wouldn’t be able to stop that attack. Wiz: In a universe chock full of planet busters, Majin Buu is one of the strongest, he's destroyed entire galaxies by systematically obliterating each planet one by one over time. “YIKES.” said everyone in shock and fear. (*Cues: Bad News - Dragon Ball Z*) Boomstick: He's defeated most of Dragonball Z's most powerful characters, including Vegeta, Gotenks, and Gohan. “He beat Vegeta?” the seven who know of the character yelled, shocked that someone as tough as the saiyan prince could lose to this monster. Wiz: He one-shot the king of the demon realm, and easily bested the Supreme Kais. Boomstick: Who are like the gods of other gods, so needless to say, Buu is pretty frickin' strong. “Buu’s powerful enough to fight gods” Celestia said as she and Luna felt dread at this. (*Cues: Kid Buu Theme - Dragon Ball Z*) Wiz: But he's also extremely cocky, caring little about strategy or personal safety, and while his regenerative ability seems to make him indestructible, Buu is one of the only Dragonball characters whose body has been visibly affected by ordinary bullets. Boomstick: And while being able to destroy planets, his body's not tough enough to take the explosion, forcing him to regenerate from a mass of pink particles. “At least there’s that but something tells me it’s not enough to stop him,” Starlight said, somewhat glad that he can still be hurt. Strengths and Feats Unprecedented amount of combat experience One-shot Dabura Ripped apart space and time Eradicated the human race in seconds Destroyed hundreds of planets Defeated Gotenks, Vegeta, and Gohan Survived a battle with Vegito Wiz: Despite having the mind of a child and the body of Play-Doh, Majin Buu might just be the deadliest villain in Dragonball history. “No kidding,” Rainbow said, not wanting to mess with Buu. Majin Buu: Me get big MAAAAAAAAAAADDDDD! Buu screams, causing a massive explosion of energy. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Everyone would say that they were afraid of Buu. Even the Princesses would admit that they feared what that thing would do if it even showed up in their homeland. No one was gonna vote for it out of dread. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Commercial (*Cues: Yacker's Plea - Sonic Colors*) Ben Singer (Wiz's voice actor) walks towards a stack of boxes of Super Saiyan God Goku chibi figure and he picks one up “Oh look! Goku figurines!” cheered Pinkie Pie with a huge Smile. “But why is his hair red?” asked Fluttershy. “And who’s that nerd?” asked Rainbow Dash while pointing at ben. Ben: Super Saiyan God Goku?! He's my best friend. “Wait, Goku has a god mode?” asked Starlight. “Why wasn’t that shown in his battle?” asked Applejack. "No clue," stated Twilight. Super Saiyan God Goku Chibi Figure: Then why do you hate me, buster? (Ben looks around) Ben: What? “Did that little Goku just talk?” Twilight asked, looking at the screen. Super Saiyan God Goku Chibi Figure: My Super Saiyan God form will eat Superman for lunch, like a delicious muffin. That's right, I'm talking to you, Ben Singer! Bet you can't even sing. “So the guy’s name Ben,” Celestia thinking it sounded a bit odd. “Pfft, what a nerd,” muttered Luna. (Shocked, Ben throws the chibi figure to the garbage bin. But the chibi figure teleports back to the table using Instant Transmission. Ben slowly looks up to the table.) Super Saiyan God Goku Chibi Figure: We see them, Ben. They're very angry. We see the comments. We see everything..... (his head spins for a few second until he stops.) “This is getting creepy,” whispered Spike, getting a bit freaked out. Ben: I don't want you anymore. Super Saiyan God Goku Chibi Figure: Wha- (Ben stuffs the chibi figure back in the box. You can hear the muffled scream of the chibi figure.) “Good call,” said Blue Blood with a nod. Ben: Merry Christmas. “What the heck's a Christmas?” asked Rainbow Dash. “Don’t know… sounds like a made up holiday to me,” Applejack said with a shrug. “It's actually Earth’s version of Hearths Warming.” Twilight explained. Boomstick: You too can own one of these totally-not-possessed limited-edition Pop Final figures, exclusively at funimation.com. Click the link below and use the code dbzscrewattack for 10% off, only at funimation.com. But right now, it's time for a DEATH BATTLE! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Wiz: Alright the combatants are set. Let's end this debate once and for all. Boomstick: It's time for a Death Battle! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Death Battle (*Cues: Kirby Triple Deluxe - Intro Theme*) On a bright day in the Kingdom of Dreamland, in what appears to be Green Greens, a multitude of citizens are enjoying the good day. Some Waddle Dees are walking around, a Bonkers is sleeping, a Knuckle Joe is simply standing around and two Waddle Doos are dancing with each other. “That looks like such a peaceful place,” Blueblood said, liking how the residents were having their own fun without a care in the world. Then suddenly, a pink beam is blasted from the sky at one of the Waddle Doos, turning it into a piece of cake. “And the moments gone,” Blueblood deadpanned. The camera moves up to reveal the source of the laser attack. Majin Buu: HELLO! “Hi!” said Pinkie with a wave. “Pinkie! No waving at the evil monster!” said Twilight with a scolding tone. (*Cues: Kirby Triple Deluxe - Moonlight Capital*) Buu then strikes one of the Waddle Dees with his Chocolate Beam, which sends the rest of the citizens running around and fleeing in panic. Buu continues to fire Chocolate Beams left and right, hitting multiple targets before shooting one at the camera. It then returns to Buu floating mid-air, laughing and cheering at all of the things he's turned to sweets which are hovering near him. Buu: Me gonna eat you up! “That's horrible….”muttered Celestia, seeing all those lives ended. “I know….. All of those calories!” cried Rarity getting some flat looks from her friends. Buu picks up one of the nearby chocolate bars and throws it into the air in an attempt to catch it in his mouth, but before it gets there a strong wind pulls it and all of the food away from him. (*Cues: Kirby Triple Deluxe - Masked Dedede*) The camera moves to the source of the wind, which would be the hero of Dreamland, Kirby, riding his Warp Star and using his inhale ability to suck up all of the food. Kirby eats all of it in one gulp with a look of satisfaction on his face. Buu however, is less than pleased with this and quite angered that his food was stolen. Buu: *Points at Kirby* YOU MAKE BUU MAD. BUU MAKE YOU DEAD! “It’s like watching a kid throw a tantrum.” muttered Starlight. FIGHT Kirby and Buu rush towards each other and collide punches, before Kirby knocks Buu back and attempts to knock him out of the sky, but Buu teleports to avoid the attack and hits Kirby with a beam from his mouth which knocks the ability copier out of the air. Kirby lands next to Bonkers, who tries to get away only for Kirby to inhale him and transform into Hammer Kirby. Buu then charges at Hammer Kirby, who counters by hitting him away with his hammer. Kirby throws the hammer at him, retrieves it, and proceeds to beat on Buu before knocking him skyward, at which point he hops onto a newly created Warp Star to knock Buu against a tree, then a wall and eventually pounding him flat against the ground. “Hot damn! That little fella is vicious!” cheered Blue Blood, breaking out of his calm demeanor. “Almost as wild as-” started Luna before her sister gave her a scaving glare. “Don’t you dare!” hissed out Celestia. Buu just pops back up, however, and proceeds to grab Kirby and slam him into the ground so hard that he loses his copy ability before throwing him into the air and knocking him into a forest. Kirby slams into a tree which frightens some of the other citizens there. He then proceeds to inhale Sword Knight and become Sword Kirby. Majin Buu returns as Sword Kirby charges up and delivers a powerful slash that cuts Majin Buu in half at the waist. “Yes, cut that monster down to size!” Rainbow said, punching the air. (*Music Ends*) Buu: *Cries* You hurt Buu! *His two halves zip back together* Almost! “DAMMIT!” everyone said as Fluttershy held her Doomguy plushie in front of her. Kirby then facepalms at what he has to deal with his opponent as a Blade Knight runs past Kirby in a panic. Buu notices them and sends a blob of his body after the fleeing swordsman, which it captures and returns to Buu, granting the jolly giant a sword, which he then uses to fight Sword Kirby. “Kind of feel bad for the monsters over there,” muttered Starlight. It had to suck living there at that moment. (*Cues: Dragon Ball Z: Budokai Tenkaichi 3 - Vital Burner*) Majin Buu then tries to swing his sword at Kirby but actually cuts a tree in half, before losing his sword and getting slashed frequently in the air before getting knocked to the ground. Buu then charges up his Chocolate Beam, causing Kirby to lose his power up out of fear when it misses and turns a boulder into pudding. However, on the second time firing, Kirby inhales the beam along with Majin Buu. Buu then winds up inside Kirby's inner dimension. Buu: No! *angrily punches cake inside Kirby's stomach dimension* NOOOO! (*Cues: Kirby's Return to Dreamland - Vs. Magolor*) Buu's anger becomes so great that it actually causes Kid Buu to separate from him. Kid Buu laughs at him being freed and destroys his doppelganger, pounding on his chest and laughing before escaping back to Dreamland through a dimensional hole. “I kind of feel bad for fat Buu,” muttered Luna as she felt like that the Pink monster might of had a small chance of redemption… if only she knew. Kirby begins to panic as Kid Buu teleports behind him and begins pummeling him before slamming Kirby onto the ground. Kid Buu then teleports in the sky and summons a Shocking Ball attack and laughs maniacally, just before firing the Shocking Ball attack at Kirby. The Warp Star then picks up Kirby just when the Shocking Ball attack was going to kill him. While Kirby is on the Warp Star, a Knuckle Joe runs next to Kirby. Kirby sees the Knuckle Joe and swallows him, becoming Fighter Kirby. Fighter Kirby bumps his fists together and rushes toward Kid Buu. “Go get him Kirby!” everyone cheered for the Pink Hero. Kid Buu is seen doing his stretchy body-shaking dance move as he laughs in what he thinks is victory, but Fighter Kirby then surprise kicks Buu in the face, throws him, and then launches what is similar to a Hadouken from Street Fighter. Kid Buu dodges this attack and tries to roundhouse kick Kirby, but Kirby blocks this and launches an uppercut. Kirby expertly blocks and dodges all of Buu's attacks until he teleports behind him and punches him, destroying his ability. “Damn it!” cursed Rainbow dash while wincing from seeing kirby take a hard blow like that. Buu knocks Kirby into a tree, breaking it, then breaks the Warp Star and sends it to Kirby, which was a big mistake. (*Cues: Kirby Triple Deluxe - Kirby Fighters Animal Helpers*) Kirby swallows the Warp Star, shocking Buu. He becomes Star Rod Kirby, and quickly shoots 3 stars at him. Buu counters, but he can not get a hit in and teleports away. Buu tries to knock it away, but Kirby gets it back and shoots more stars. After Buu teleports many times, Kirby predicts where Buu will go and shoots a gold beam of energy, blowing Buu to pieces. But Buu regenerates and destroys the Star Rod. The loss of Kirby's ultimate weapon leaves him hopeless and crying, while Buu is readying his most powerful attack, the Planet Burst. “Please get up Kirby,” Fluttershy said quietly. “You can’t give up. Dreamland, or what’s left of it, is counting on you,” Twilight said, everyone else holding their breathe as they watched. (*Cues: Kirby Triple Deluxe - Hypernova Kirby*) As Kirby is crying over the loss of his Star Rod, the Miracle Fruit in his stomach activates, causing him to become Hypernova Kirby. Hypernova Kirby swallows and spits out the Planet Burst, and a shocked Buu is helpless, and is shot into the sun by the returned attack. When the sun turns around, it shows Kirby's face, which is zoomed into three times with loud drumming sounds in the background. Kirby: HIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII! KO! Kirby inhales the last remaining part of Buu (his boot) and becomes Buu Kirby and uses the chocolate beam to turn two Waddle Dees into cookies. “..... that can’t be good.” said Twilight wide eyed. Results (*Cues: Kirby Squeak Squad - The Hero of Dreamland *) Boomstick: No way! Did that seriously just happen? “Eyup” said Applejack in the same fashion as her brother. Wiz: Yep. Oddly enough Kirby's strength, speed and durability matched and surpassed Buu's. Yes, Buu has more destructive capability, but Kirby's inhale and copy ability let him absorb and rebound anything that could have killed him. “True. Kirby did have more versatile abilities,” Twilight said, nodding to herself. “It also helps that he had some abilities that could destroy evil. Might not have worked with Fat Buu but Kid Buu is another story,” Starlight said outloud. Boomstick: And Kirby's no slouch when it comes to power. He tanked a planet-sized explosion without a scratch when the same kind of blast turns Buu into mush. And remember the frying pan thing? “How can we forget? You keep bringing it up,” said Rarity with nothing but snark in her tone. Wiz: Popstar is approximately the same size as the planet Shiver Star, which is actually a post-apocalyptic Earth. This means Popstar's gravity and escape velocity must be similar to that of Earth's. Throwing the giant acid monster Popon up to the sun means Kirby threw at least 3.5 tons over 25 000 miles per hour, and that's not even counting the giant frying pan or the return trip. Boomstick: And Kirby's Warp Star moves faster than light, a speed that Buu has never had to combat before. "BUT BOOMSTICK, Buu could teleported away from the planet burst ball, right?" “Ya why didn’t he?” asked Applejack with a raised Brow. Wiz: Well, his Instantaneous Movement has limits in extreme situations, such as when he didn't use it when a similar giant ball of murder was KILLING him at the end of Dragon Ball Z. “Well that's just stupid,” muttered Rarity. Boomstick: Buu just couldn't stomach this fight. “...ow the puns, they hurt.” muttered Blue Blood. Wiz: The winner is Kirby. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Boomstick: Next time on Death Battle. Some rock music kicked in as a white haired man wearing black and red and wielding a giant blade showed up on screen he was kicking some ass on screen. Then his opponent appeared on screen, a tall and muscular bad boy wearing a red headband and spiky brown hair and has odd looking blade who then slashes with a fire strikes. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ “Well that was a good episode” said Twilight while everyone else was getting up and stretching out any kinks from sitting for so long. “I agree Twilight and i’m glad i could come and enjoy the show with you all,” said Blue Blood with a nod. Getting a smile from his childhood friend. “Well Nephew, we could stay for the next episode.” suggested Luna getting a nod of agreement. “Oh! You should stay Blue!” agreed Twilight with a cheer, getting her old friend to smile. “Well ok if you insist i just hope the Pony you had take over while we’re gone doesn't mind waiting a little bit longer.” said Blue Blood. “Oh don’t worry i’m sure he’s doing just fine,” said Celestia reassuringly. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~(back with thor)~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ “Now that i have defeated your men and saved the ponies food, you have no choice but to surrender,” Thor said, waving his hammer threateningly at a gopher. This wasn’t just any regular gopher, it was the Gopher King wearing a red and white cape with a golden crown on his head. “(Curse you. I’ve been planning this attack for years. Now they’re in ruins because of a steroid overdosed pegasus)” the Gopher King yelled in his native tongue, waving his tiny paw threateningly. “HAHA, just another victory for the PRINCE OF ASGARD!” Thor said while laughing. A little ways from the laughing god were two guards looking at the scene in bewilderment. “This is the guy who’s shagging our princess,” one of the guards said in a deadpan tone. His partner glances at him and says, “Kinda fitting though.” Just a normal day in the life of the royal guards. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~back with the main group.~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ “Before we start the next episode, let’s see what we got from the box,” Twilight said, walking towards the glowing box. Her friends and former mentor followed as they gathered around the box. “So this is where you got those interesting items, Auntie?” Blueblood asked, looking at the box with slight interest. “That’s correct, nephew. Whenever an episode is done, this box gives certain things related to the episode,” Luna said, showing off her utility belt. Twilight opened the box with her magic and looked inside to see what they got. The next moment her horn started to glow as a bunch of items were levitated out of the box. “Looks like we got more comics,” Twilight said, handing out a bunch of them. “This’ll be good to read later,” Rainbow said, looking through the Dragonball Z manga. “Got that right,” Spike said, walking over to a self and putting his comics there. “What else do you have, darling?” Rarity asked, looking at two covered objects in Twilight’s magical field. Looking at the packages, Twilight said, “It seems that one’s for Flurry Heart and the other is for Fluttershy.” She then gave the shy mare the wrapped package, who looked at it curiously. She then took her time to open it, carefully removing the wrappings without making a mess. In no time, Fluttershy was finished and held a Kirby plushie in her hooves. “So adorable,” Fluttershy said, hugging the plushie and causing it to say “Hiiii”. The group of ponies and one dragon either laughed or rolled their eyes good heartedly. With that done, Spike walked back to the couch and asked, “Can we start the next episode?” “Sure, just a second,” Twilight said, her horn glowing as the other wrapped package suddenly disappeared. “Sent it to Flurry Heart?” Starlight asked, her eyebrow rising a bit. “Shining actually. Figured it would be safer to do,” Twilight said, sitting on the couch and grabbing the remote. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Chapter end! Next time Sol badguy vs ragna the bloodedge. Ragna VS Sol Badguy.“So are we ready for the next episode?” Twilight asked everyone in the room. The assorted ponies and dragon nodded as Rainbow flew into the air in an excited fashion. “Hell yeah, I'm ready for this awesomeness-induced episode,” Rainbow said, psyching herself up with her hooves crossed over her chest. “And how do you know it's gonna be awesome, Dash?” Applejack asked, her eyebrow raised. “Heeellllooo? Do you know who you're talking to?” Rainbow asked, floating in front of her friends. “I know. I know. You're Rainbow Dash right,” Pinkie said excitedly, bouncing on the couch. “That’s right. I'm the most awesome mare alive and i know when something is awesome,” Rainbow said proudly. “How?” Starlight asked, sighing slightly. “The trailer showed swords, muscles and epic music. They wouldn’t make this a lame episode if they had that,” Rainbow said, as if explaining what two plus two equals. “Well we’re not gonna find out from the braggot,” Blueblood said, grinning as everyone else laughed. “Hey, watch it Princey.” Rainbow said mildly offended. “So let’s start this episode and see if it’s true or not,” Blueblood said, not bothering to look at the blue pegasus. Twilight took that as her que to push the play button and start the episode. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Interlude (*Cues: Invader - Jim Johnston*) Wiz: No anime tough guy trope is complete unless he has outrageous spiky hair, a sword that's clearly compensating for something... “Oh my,” muttered a blushing Fluttershy while Rainbow snickered. Boomstick: And belts. Lots and lots of belts. “Oh gag me,” muttered Rarity, not liking that kind of fashion design. “I agree, honestly how long would it take to put on that many belts anyway?” Celestia nodded. “And what's the point of wearing extra belts? They go around the waist, nowhere else!” “Rule of cool my dear Aunt, rule of cool.” BlueBlood stated as if it were a solid fact. “This guy gets it!” Rainbow nodded. Wiz: Ragna, the Bloodedge. Boomstick: And Sol Badguy, the Flame of Corruption. He's Wiz and I'm Boomstick. Wiz: And it's our job to analyze their weapons, armor, and skills to find out who would win... a Death Battle. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Ragna (*Cues: BlazBlue Calamity Trigger - Imperial Code*) Wiz: Nearly a century ago, humanity was hunted to near-extinction by the fearsome Black Beast. The group shuddered at the portrait that was shown on screen depicting of a multi headed beast terrorizing people who were fleeing a burning city. “This show is entertaining but it constantly shows us monsters that could bring the end to our world,” said Celestia as she tried to calm down her nerves. Wiz: Fortunately, six brave heroes slayed the monster and saved mankind. The remains of humanity was reorganized under an oppressive government until one man decided to rise up. Ragna the Bloodedge. “Hmmmm six heroes saving the world from great danger… where have i heard that one before?” asked BlueBlood with a knowing smirks while getting some laughs from his aunt’s and even a few cheers from Starlight Spike who was jumping up and down for a the group of SIX young mares who saved the world from great threats. “Awwww shucks it was no big deal,” laughed Applejack, cheeks red from all of the attention she and the rest of her friends were getting. “B-but you're welcome though,” whispered Fluttershy as she hid behind her mane. (*Cues: BlazBlue Calamity Trigger - Rebellion*) Boomstick: Baggy pants, giant sword, brooding personality. Ragna has tragic back-story written all over him. “What anime character doesn't?” Starlight asked. “Either that or angsty teenager. Sort of like Luna when she went through puberty.” said a smirking Celestia. “Yea- HEY! We did not act like that!” yelled Luna once she caught what her sister said. “I remember a certain pony who would lock herself in her room and recite angsty poetry while dressed in dark robes and wearing too much make up. “That was Nightmare Moon corruption!” yelled Luna in a desperate tone. Celestia gave her younger sister a flat look and a raised brow. “Oh really? One Hundred and Thirty years before that even happened? Thirty before you even ascended?” “Well... Just shut up…” muttered Luna lamely as her cheeks were burning redder than an apple from Sweet Apple acres. “Soooo... how was the poetry?” Twilight couldn’t help but ask. Celestia just gave her former student a shrug. “Bad. I believe one of her better works was something along the line of "Ooooh this pale orb in our sky hear mine words of gloom! Why hast mine mother denied me mine dessert for dirtying mine room!", I used her collection of poems as a torture method during the Griffin war. I believe they called the collection the 'Mental Plucking by Nightmare Moon', I never bothered correcting them.” Luna buries her head in her hooves and groans while the rest of the audience just, stares at her and Celestia. Wiz: I'd actually go with gruesome. As a young child, he and his siblings were confined in an experimental facility as lab rats. “.... oh god,” muttered Fluttershy. Boomstick: Bummer. What were they trying to do? Wiz: No one knows. The important thing here is they were rescued by a talking cat named Jubei, who also happened to be the most feared warrior on the planet. However, things took a darker turn when Ragna's sister Saya grew very sick. Boomstick: With what? Wiz: Sickness? No one knows. Ragna took Saya under his wing, but their younger brother Jin was irritated that Ragna was not spending more time with him. Being a reasonable guy, he decided the only solution was to murder his brother. “WHAT. THE. FUCK!?” shouted the group at the asinine idea that Jin came up with. Boomstick: Oh yeah! That makes a ton of sense! I'm lonely. I'll kill one of the people I care about. Great plan. So then a maniacal hipster villain named Yuki Terumi showed up out of nowhere, helped Jin impale Ragna through the chest, and then cut off his arm for good measure. “What kind of foul cretin could just impale his own kin like that! Aunt Luna at least had the excuse of being possessed!” raged Blue Blood. “Who knows?” said Luna with a shrug. “Well I am sure that even if things went bad for them in the beginning, they made up and got better!” Said Twilight in a hopeful tone. And right on cue the magic box gave off a soft glow before a slip of paper flew out and made it’s way to hover in front of Twilight for her to read. NOPE. Was written on the small pieces of paper before it spontaneously combusted, leaving nothing but ash. “Oh... I think I need a drink right now.” muttered a depressed Twilight. She was then surprised when Blue Blood held up a silver flask with a rose design engraved on it. “Here, my personal stash of Minotaur Whiskey for aunt induced migraines.” said Blue Blood with a soft chuckle as his old playmate gave him a thankful smile before taking the offered drink and taking a few sips. “HEY!” yelled the two sisters in irritation. Wiz: Why? How? No one knows. Have you familiarized yourself with that phrase yet? Good, cuz it's not stopping anytime soon. “Oh JOY…” Spike groaned as he noticed Twilight’s eye start to twitch right before she took a huge swig the flask. Background 6'0.8"/185 cm 172 lbs/78 kg Blood type: B Alias: the Grim Reaper Frequent dine-and-dasher Bounty: 90,000,000,000 (Everyone was shocked by the large bounty) His foul mouth gives him the Angry Video Game Nerd a run for his money Has a crippling fear of ghosts (Most of the group were giggling at this) (*Cues: BlazBlue Calamity Trigger - Queen of Roses*) Boomstick: Moving on for sanity's sake,(Twilight: thank you!) Ragna would've been done for until an omniscient time-traveling pig-tailed vampire descended from the heavens, snapped her fingers, magicked him a new arm, and left. No, no. Don't think. Just accept. “This is getting bizarre even for me….” Pinkie said. “Does…. Does not compute,” muttered out Twilight as she was trying yet again to understand another worlds laws and how things are done.... Right before saying fuck it and taking another swig of BlueBlood’s flask. ‘Well she’s broken….” said Spike with a sigh. “I hope she doesn't take after you when it comes to drinking sister,” Luna deadpanned. Giving her blushing sister a flat stare. “I’m not that bad,” whined Celestia with a pouted. “ you drink poko when you're frustrated! I don’t want to hear it from you!” lectured Luna as her sister just kept pouting. “And i thought Luna was the younger sibling,” whispered Applejack jokingly to the rest of the group. Getting a few laughs. Wiz: Surprisingly still conscious and apparently an expert of things that never happened before, Ragna instantly recognized his new appendage as a Azure Grimoire, a piece of the Black Beast which Ragna can use to manipulate Seithr. Seithr is a radioactive energy left behind by the Black Beast all over the world. “So wait they're using something that came from the monster that nearly killed everypony?” asked Applejack with a raised brow. “That doesn't seem smart,” stated Rarity. Boomstick: Like magic. Wiz: Well no. Magic is totally different. “Then what is it Wiz?” asked an annoyed Rainbow. Boomstick: But it lets him do magic-type stuff... Wiz: Yes... “My head hurts…” whined Fluttershy. (*Cues: Black And White - BlazBlue Chrono Phantasma*) Boomstick: Ooo... kay! “I'm confused, if it's not magic then what is it?” Starlight asked in confusion. “Might want to just let it go unless you want to end up like Twilight over there,” Said Luna as she pointed at a twitching mess that was once Twilight Sparkle. “Good point…” said Starlight with a sweat drop running down her head. Boomstick: Well after missing out on the maiming and resurrection of Ragna, Jubei the cat ninja returned and decided to teach him the ways of combat. “Well that’s nice… but where was he?” asked Celestia. Wiz: Where the hell was he before? No one knows. “...... that’s not a good answer,” said Celestia in a deadly tone, eyes narrowed and some ponies swore they saw her mane start to spark a little. Boomstick: Probably destroying someone's furniture or pissing in their shoes. “Most likely,” Agreed Rarity. Raising a cat taught you one thing… cats can be real assholes. Wiz: Through his training, Ragna's control over Seithr became practically unmatched. He can form various parts of the Black Beast in combat, transform his own arm into razor-sharp claws, or drain the soul of his foe through his strikes. “Shouldn’t him using the Black Beast powers be raising some red flags that something might be wrong?” asked BlueBlood. “Maybe that's just how his new arm works,” shrugged Spike deciding to give up on understanding this crazy world. Boomstick: But if he needs more power, more defense, and more... soul-sucking, he can crank these up to 11 with his Blood Kain form. “That's a pretty sweet sounding super mode.” said Rainbow with a nod of respect. Azure Grimoire Gives Ragna virtually unmatched control over seithr Absorbs the soul of its target (Everyone had chills at this) Augmented by the Idea Engine Acquired from the dying ^-No.11 Adds the ability to create a force shield Can activate Blood Kain without losing life force Turned Ragna's right eye red when bonded with him Doubles Ragna's attack power Wiz: Upon completing his training, Jubei bestowed upon him a red cloak and a deadly blade called Blood-Scythe. “But it’s a sword… not a scythe,” said Starlight with a raised brow. Boomstick: This baby can extend for stabbing strikes and like the Azure Grimoire, slowly drains the souls of its victims upon contact. And before you point out that it's clearly a sword and not a scythe, it can do this. Ragna use his Astral Heat on Arakune, which causes Blood-Scythe to transform into a Scythe. “THAT IS SO. COOL!!!” Rainbow and Spike cheered. Move Set Hell's Fang Dashes in with a seithr-enhanced punch Inferno Divider A rising leap slash using his sword Gauntlet Hades Downward strike powered by seithr Dead Spike Summons the jaws of the Black Beast Blood Kain Boosts speed, power and soul-draining ability (*Cues: Nemesis Horizon - BlazBlue Chrono Phantasma*) Boomstick: Ragna's angsty rage took him on a world tour of single-handed government smashing, earning him the nickname the Grim Reaper. “Sooooo cool!” gushed Rainbow Dash. “Indeed it reminds me of our old names during the griffon war, right Red Sun?” asked Luna with a smirk getting one from her sister. “Indeed, Crescent Blade.” Celestia said with a chuckle. “Now that's cool!” Said Spike Be Rainbow Dash with stars in their eye’s. Wiz: And racking up an unprecedented bounty of 90 billion... whatever their currency is. No one knows. And despite being the largest bounty of all time, he still freely walks the world on foot and in public with no attempt to disguise himself whatsoever. “I highly doubt that most ponies would try to confront someone with that kind of bounty” stated BlueBlood getting a few nods from everyone else. Boomstick: Probably because nobody wants to piss him off. We're talkin' about a guy who treats getting knocked through solid concrete as an inconvenience, has survived multiple impalings through the chest, took out hundreds of armed officers without breaking a sweat, and obliterated an entire street with a single one-hand sword strike. “Hot damn! Thats some power right there!” said Applejack with a wide eyed look. Wiz: Ragna is referred to as some as the most powerful man in the world, but he's also known as a risk-taker with a short temper. Everyone gave the resident speedster in the room a look. “What?” asked Rainbow Dash, feeling a little self conscious from the stares she was getting. Boomstick: And despite being trained by the most dangerous kitty cat in the world, Ragna's obviously nowhere near Jubei's level of skill, who terrifies even the deadliest villains of the series. “But he’s so cute~!” gushed Fluttershy after getting a good look at Jubei. Feats Accelerated healing ability Extremely high pain tolerance Taken many impale wounds through vital organs Sacrificed his left arm showing zero pain Punched a crater into a wall with his non-Azure Grimoire hand Defeated the giant anti-Black Beast bio-weapon, Take-Mikazuchi Can defeat Murakumo Units without using his Azure Grimoire Wiz: But after all's said and done, Jubei left Ragna with a dire warning: never think of the Azure Grimoire as your own. Boomstick: Which is kind of bullshit. I mean it's attached to him, so I'm pretty sure he's got dibs. “I don’t think it works like that,” muttered Starlight with a flat look. Wiz: Well he does, but if he loses control over it, it can transform him into the Black Beast itself. “Ha! See i told ya using that power was bad,” yelled Applejack in triumph. Wiz: In fact, Ragna was the original Black Beast, sent back in time after falling into a magic cauldron. The two were somehow separated and did battle in the past. These events would repeat themselves in a 100 year time loop until this chick saved Ragna from falling into that cauldron, stopping the Black Beast from appearing in the past in the first place. “......what?” asked a confused Pinkie Pie. Boomstick: But if the Black Beast never went back in time, then it never would've created Seithr, and everything in BlazBlue shouldn't exist as we know it. So how... Wiz: No one knows. “Now my head is starting to hurt and I was part of several time shenanigans!” said Starlight while nursing a growing headache. Boomstick: You wanna just make this guy fight someone now? “Yes please!” yelled everyone in a desperate tone. Ragna: I'm the main character, and yet again, I get left in the dark! It's really starting to piss me off! “Please tell me that the next character isn't as confusing as this one!” Twilight groaned. “Hope not, my booz supply would be able to handle it,” muttered BlueBlood. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Sol Badguy (*Cues: Guilty Gear XX - Existence*) Wiz: Way back in the year 2010, the discovery of magic forever changed the course of human history. Traditional technology was eliminated for newer and environmentally friendly methods, and after improving the planet, a certain world superpower sought to improve mankind itself. “Hey Twi didn’t you say that Sunset was planning on doing something similar?” asked Rainbow Dash getting a nod from her purple friend. “Yes, Sunset has been planning on not only introducing magic to the human world but she has also been working on some plans to integrate it into everyday life to help everyone,” explained the Princess of friendship. This impressed the rest of the group, especially Celestia who felt a huge swell of pride building in her chest. Boomstick: Oh hey, another super soldier project. Lemme guess, they injected this guy with some serum and it didn't really work out the way they wanted, but now he's a badass. Wiz: Replace serum with magic and... close enough. This man would emerge as the feared bounty hunter, Sol Badguy. Boomstick: So he's clearly the bad guy... Wiz: Actually he's the main hero of the story. “Wait, what?” Twilight said, confused beyond belief. “You wouldn’t think that given his name,” Blueblood said. “Seriously, who names their kid that?” Boomstick: Well then why would they... Background 6'0"/184 cm 163 lbs/74 kg Real Name: Frederick Alias: Haitoku no Honoo Flame of Corruption Favourite band: Queen Ironically Guilty Gear's protagonist, despite the name Has a degree in particle physics (Twilight was intrigued by this) (*Cues: Guilty Gear XX Accent Core Plus - Launch Out*) Wiz: Before Sol's transformation, he was known as Frederick, a scientist tasked with leading the super soldier project alongside with his love interest, Aria, but when he intended to or not, Frederick would become the prototype of this new super race, the Gears. Boomstick: But is he... guilty? Wiz: Oh hell yeah. He was responsible for Aria's death... and then her next death when she was resurrected into this thing. “Guess they can turn people into robots,” Starlight said, half impressed yet half disturbed. “Kinda like Dr. Eggman…” Rainbow mused, not liking where this was going. Boomstick: Oh. Wasn't expecting her to look like that, but not as much as I wasn't expecting the BLUE ROBO PENIS! Who even does that?! Spike and BlueBlood looked ready to puke. “That’s just bucked up,” said a green face Celestia. Wiz: She was likely created as a "FU” to poor Sol by That Man. Boomstick: Which man? (*Cues: Guilty Gear 2: Overture - The Man*) Wiz: That Man. Boomstick: I only see Sol Badguy- “Boomstick is right, i only see Sol,” said Rainbow Dash while she scratched her head. Wiz: No, no it's That Man. “Oh i see who he's talking about!” said Twilight as she spotted the robed man who must be That Man. “Who is it sugarcube?” asked Applejack but before Twilight could answer her friend she was interrupted by Boomstick. Boomstick: It's just me and you here, Wiz. “Ya egghead i don’t see anypony!” yelled an annoyed Rainbow Dash. Wiz/Twilight: Listen. The villain is That Man. Boomstick/Rainbow Dash: Sol Badguy's the hero and the villain? "what a twist!" gasped out Pinkie Pie. Wiz: No, no, he's another character- just pretend Sol Badguy's not there. “What he said Rainbow Dash,” sighed a frustrated Twilight, who was half tempted to grab Blue Bloods flask. Boomstick/Pinky and Dash: YOU MEAN HE'S INVISIBLE?! “I didn’t know Sol would have such a sneaky power!” Gasped out Rainbow Dash much to Twilight's growing rage. BlueBlood and Spike began to sweat. “Oh dear…” Rarity mumbled while Fluttershy hid behind the Princesses. Wiz: When this person was born into the world, his parents looked at this child and decided they would name him "That Man". “Do you finally get it?” groaned out Twilight. Boomstick: Who were they looking at Wiz?! “Ya!” Agreed Rainbow and Pinkie, while the rest of the group notice Twilight's eyes were going bloodshot and twitching wildly. Wiz/Twilight: HIS NAME IS T-H-A-T SPACE, M-A-N! Boomstick: WELL F-U-C-K SPACE Y-O-U! I'M OUT! “Man Twi, for an Egghead you're being kinda dumb,” muttered Rainbow Dash. “Yeah silly-filly! Stop being silly” Pinkie called out, which was the final straw as the rest of the group saw Twilight main burst into flame. “RWARRRR!” Twilight let out a Bloodthirsty roar as she tackled the two much to everyone's shock. “Somepony grab her!” yelled Rarity as the group tried to save Rainbow and Pinkie from an enraged Twilight. The screen pauses and goes gray as Boomstick slams the door off-screen. It took a few moments but they were able to pry Twilight away from the two ponies, Rainbow was now sporting a black eye and Pinkie's mane and tail had been burned, the two were now sitting far away from the lavender Unicorn. (*Cues: The Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time - Windmill Hut*) [Some time later...] Boomstick: So... I looked at the internet and discovered that his actual name is That Man. I apologize for earlier. Let's move on. “Oh, I see… our bad,” muttered Rainbow Dash now getting why her purple friend lost her cool. (*Cues: Guilty Gear - Death and Republic*) Wiz: Sol had to maintain a human appearance to disguise his true Gear form. So he developed a special limiter headpiece to keep his own power at bay. “Maybe we should have one of those made. Just incase,” Rarity said, glancing at Twilight. Boomstick: If that thing comes off, say goodbye to whoever recently pissed him off. Everyone in the group gave Twilight another look. “.... what?” asked Twilight with a flat look. “You know damn well what!” Rainbow snapped, gesturing to her black eye. Twilight blushed, “Ehehehe… sorry…” Wiz: As a Gear, Sol's aging was slowed to a near halt, allowing him more than enough time to develop his own fighting style. Boomstick: Well whatever fighting style lets you punch fire, that's the one I wanna learn. Sol's volcanic viper punches are flame-enhanced strikes while his riot stamp flies in with a fearsome kick. And because this is anime, Sol can trigger his second form: the Dragon Install. “Those are some devastating moves,” Luna said, liking the riot stomp “Indeed they are,” Celestia said, taking note on a few of them. Spike perked up at hearing Dragon Install and paid close attention to the next part. Wiz: The Dragon Install allows Sol to safely tap into a fraction of his full Gear power, boosting his strength, speed, and healing ability. The drawback: he can only sustain this power for so long and afterward, he's left vulnerable. “Sigh… another high risk power up?” asked Starlight. “Hey go big or go home,” shrugged Rainbow Dash. Move Set Gun Flame Shoots fire projectiles from the ground Commonly mistaken for "girlfriend" when called out Bandit Revolver A forward-moving spinning attack Riot Stamp Springs off the wall and flies in foot-first Volcanic Viper Leaps upward, slashing with his sword Dragon Install Temporary enhances speed and power Boomstick: As Sol wandered the Earth, That Man began a plan for world domination using an army of Gears. In response, Sol put together a Gear-obliterating superweapon called OutRage. Wiz: Which looks like the world's most complicated can opener... or next-gen Bop-It. “That was a confusing game, wasn’t it, Twilight?” Spike said, looking at the lavender princess. “It wasn’t that bad,” Twilight said, shrugging her shoulders. “Though I shudder if that’s what it’ll look like,” she said, taking a good look at the weapon. “Looks a bit confusing to be a weapon,” Starlight, Rarity, Luna and Blueblood said at the same time. They couldn’t wrap their heads around it and they wondered how it could work. Boomstick: Turns out it was so powerful nobody could wield it... not even Sol. So he had to split it apart into eight pieces just to make it useable. Naturally, he took the best piece for himself: the flame-enhanced Fireseal. I wanna fire seal, that'd be fuckin' sweet. Try and eat me now, orca whale. Fire seal! That earned a few giggles while Fluttershy whimpered at the image of a seal burning. She thought the animal was too cute and wanted to see one some day. (*Cues: Guilty Gear 2: Overture - The Re-Coming*) Wiz: Using Fireseal to its full potential, Sol defeated That Man's forces twice over. Boomstick: And then he decided to upgrade the shit out of it with the Junkyard Dog Mark 3 casing. Wiz: But this is hardly the full extent of Sol's power. He once survived the Backyard, an alternate dimension which would annihilate the soul of a normal man. And by removing his headband, he can access his full unrestrained potential. The group, even the princesses, shuttered as they saw Sol’s fangs. Boomstick: Like when he shot a laser out of his sword to incinerate an inhuman Gear the size of Mount Everest! Everyone’s eyes went wide when they heard that as Rainbow said, “He shot a laser out his sword?!!!” “And destroyed a gear of that size?!!!” Rarity yelled as Twilight started to feel light headed and Fluttershy held up Doomguy plushie as a shield. Wiz: And once, he went back in time and witnessed his past self get murdered, which should've erased him from the present ala Marty McFly, but he didn't like that idea very much, so he just... didn't. “...What?” most of the group asked “Trying to question the rules of time travel is pointless at this point…” Starlight sighed. Getting a nod from Twilight. Feats Completely incinerated a huge Gear with a fraction of his power (That scared the Princesses) Survived witnessing his past self die Actual reason given: because he's Sol Badguy (Rainbow liked this) Outran a missile and hung onto it with just his fist Endured the soul-destroying atmosphere of The Backyard Once stabbed through the shoulder, then used that same arm to swing his sword seconds later Boomstick: After BlazBlue, nothing is too bizarre for me anymore. “Wish we could say the same,” Applejack said, looking at her barely awake friend. Twilight seemed to be just a hair trigger away from passing out. Wiz: Sol is powerful, but fears his full potential. He's also pretty lazy. His favorite strategy is always whatever's the least strenuous. This lack of extra effort can sometimes leave him underestimating his opponent. Boomstick: But the second he starts trying, few can stand in his way. “HELL YEAH,” Rainbow cheered, watching the awesome ending of Sol’s analysis. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Wiz: Alright, the combatants are set. Let’s end this debate once and for all. Boomstick: It’s time for a DEATH BATTLE!!!!!!!! Before the battle could start, Twilight paused the episode to let everyone discuss on the ones they’ll root for. Ragna was a powerful fighter in his own right and had interesting attacks, but he was a risk taker and a bit hot headed. Sol, on the other hand, knew how to use his powers and was more experienced, but had a lazy attitude. “I feel that I’m gonna have to go with Sol on this,” Celestia said “Oh?” Luna asked, interested in her sister’s reasoning. “I feel that he’s better suited to win since he had time to hone his skills,” Celestia said simply. “I would have thought it was his laziness that won you over,” Luna said, grinning as Celestia glared at her. In the end Celestia and Rainbow Dash voted for Sol as Luna and Blueblood voted for Ragna. The rest of the mane 6 and Starlight didn’t vote as they just wanted to watch the fight. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Death Battle (Note, Sol speaks in Japanese, so all his dialogue will be in parenthesis.) The fight takes place in BlazBlue's Kagutsuchi at nighttime during a rainstorm. In a large garden, Sol is looking over at a wanted poster for Ragna. Ragna walks right past Sol, who then runs past him and stops him in his tracks. Sol: (You're an eyesore!) Ragna: Who are you? Out of my way, or you're dead. Sol: (Tsk. Gun Flame!) “Did they seriously start a fight over something so trivial?” Rarity asked. “Are you really surprised with this show?” Applejack asked, eyebrow raised. “Fair point,” Rarity said, Sol releases Gun Flame at Ragna, which Ragna steps back and avoids. Ragna: You gotta be kidding me. Let's get this over with! (*Cues: Blood Pain II - BlazBlue Chrono Phantasma*) Sol: (I'll burn you to a crisp.) “Ya! No more talking! Just fight!” cheered Rainbow Dash. FIGHT! Sol charges at Ragna, whom is about to slam Blood-Scythe down, and stops it with Fireseal. The two knock each other back and Sol tries using Gun Flame again. Ragna avoids this and lunges at Sol, whom jumps back before slamming Fireseal. The two clash weapons once again, then swing their swords at each other. As Ragna goes for a strike, Sol jumps upward and kicks Ragna, who goes flying toward a wall. Ragna bounces upward to attack, but Sol kicks him multiple times before sending him slamming to the ground. “Ultra combo!” yelled pinkie Pie. Ragna lands on his knees and breathes heavily before preparing the Azure Grimoire. Ragna: Bitch! Restriction Number 6... Before Ragna can finish, he is kicked by Sol, knocking him back. “That was a bit rude,” Fluttershy said, hugging Doomguy plushie. “It’s a fight Fluttershy.” said Applejack. Ragna: You're gonna pay! Ragna punches the ground, then raises Azure Grimoire. Suddenly, Sol is trapped by Dead Spike. Ragna: Restriction 666 released, Dimensional Interruption Imaginary Number Formed! BlazBlue, activate! “Golly, that’s a jump in animation quality,” Pinkie said, holding her hooves to her mouth. Ragna charges at Sol for a punch. The Dead Spike holding Sol disappears, but before he can react, Ragna punches him, sending him flying into the next area, where he bounces off a wall. Before he can hit the ground, Ragna uses the Azure Grimoire to stab him, then proceeds to unleash a combo with Blood-Scythe. Ragna: It's my turn now! The combo concludes with Sol hitting the ground. Ragna picks him up, but the grapple is reversed and Sol throws Ragna into the wall. “It’s always getting thrown against a wall with him” said Rarity as she took notice of Ragna’s happed of slamming into the wall in this fight. Ragna: Idea Engine, linked! This'll sting! Suddenly, the Azure Grimoire glows with a white light and Sol is suddenly knocked right into the wall. He then falls down with his next comment muffled by the ground. “Okay. There’s too much stuff goin on,” Applejack said, trying to keep track of the fight and the combos they were doing. “It’s a fighting game. You get use to it,” Spike said, eating a ruby. (*Cues: Ride The Fire - Guilty Gear Xrd*) Sol gets up and unleashes Dragon Install to tap into his power, to which Ragna retaliates with Blood Kain. Ragna: Blood Kain! “Now things are getting really “heated” up and they’re about to get “bloodied” up,” Luna said, thinking it was a good pun. Unfortunately the assorted ponies and dragon groaned as if it physically hurt them. “Please don’t be like Boomstick or Sunset,” Celestia said, groaning while shaking her head. “Sunset made puns?” Spike and Twilight said outloud. “When she was younger. It was one of the reasons why we never got along,” Celestia said, thinking about all the wasted bonding moments. The two charge at each other and strike, with both hitting the other's sword. Sol is on the offensive and overpowers Ragna, then knocks him into the air. During his assault, Ragna reverses it and slams Sol back to the ground. He flies downward and swings Blood-Scythe as Sol jumps out of the way, then the two trade swings and punches. Then Ragna grabs ahold of Sol by his head and tosses him into the air before punching him and striking him with Blood-Scythe multiple times. Ragna: Inferno Divider! “What a “bloody” combo,” Blueblood said, grinning at Celestia’s discomfort. “Please stop with the puns,” Celestia begged, thinking of how her daughter would react to this. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ with sunset ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ We find Sunset at her apartment sleeping in her bed until she suddenly woke up and look up at her ceiling with narrowed eyes. “My pun senses are tingling,” Sunset said out of the blue. “Thats nice babe now please come back to bed,” muttered Adagio while her sisters tried pulling Sunset back to bed with them. “Sigh… might as well, i got a date with Twilight in the morning anyway.” muttered Sunset as she hopped back into bed. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ back with the group~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Ragna lands and exits Blood Kain while Sol falls to the ground. Sol lies down and is about to get up, but then he exits Dragon Install and is momentarily stunned. Ragna uses this to his advantage and grabs him. Ragna: Tappin' out? “More like knocked out,” muttered BlueBlood. Ragna places Blood-Scythe in front of him, then extends it, penetrating through Sol, who screams out in pain. Ragna then tears it out of Sol, whom falls to the ground. Ragna: I'm not gonna waste anymore time on you, asshole! Suddenly, Ragna is stabbed. Ragna: Shit! Sol had stabbed Ragna above the groin with Fireseal. Ragna steps back and begins to bleed from his wound. This pushes Ragna too far and after dark clouds of smoke cover him. “That doesn’t look good,” Twilight said, feeling a bit uneasy at the ominus scene. (*Cues: Howling Moon II - BlazBlue Chrono Phantasma*) Ragna transforms into the multi-headed Black Beast. “Damn he's big!” yelled Applejack. “I don’t think I would try and fight that,” Rainbow said, taking Doomguy plushie from Fluttershy. The shy mare was hiding behind her rainbow maned friend as the plushie’s eyes glowed crimson. “As my beloved would say: fought bigger.” Celestia smirked. Sol looks over at the eight-headed beast and as smoke covers him, he takes off his headband and transforms into his true Gear form. As the heads of the Black Beast charge towards Sol, Sol swings Fireseal, firing a powerful blast. The Black Beast's heads are overwhelmed and the blast continues to fire upward into the sky. After a bright flash of light, Sol is seen standing on a small piece of land after the attack in his regular form, with Ragna nowhere to be seen. Sol then cracks his neck and chuckles. “.... Well that was anticlimactic,” Pinkie muttered, thinking that the fight ended a bit too fast. K.O.! Sol jumps down into the rubble, comes across a book titled "BlazBlue Story Script", knocks it upward, punches it away with a fiery strike, and then walks off. “NOOOOO!!! SO MANY UNANSWERED QUESTIONS!!!,” Twilight screamed, rocking back and forth on the couch. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Results (*Cues: Guilty Gear Xrd Sign - Give Me a Break*) Boomstick: Bullseye! Wiz: Ragna put up a tough fight, but Sol had him outclassed. Boomstick: Likely due to the fact that while Ragna had on four belts, Sol had 18. “Makes sense to me,” Blueblood said, grinning as he knew what would happen next. “NO IT DOESN’T!! DON’T EVEN SAY THAT!!” Twilight yelled, her eye twitching slightly. Wiz: Sol's centuries worth of fighting experience trumped Ragna's training and he has consistently shaken off wounds more easily. Boomstick: Even Sol's... soul is tough enough to withstand Ragna's Azure Grimoire, just like when it survived the Backyard. “So Sol has a strong “soul”,” Luna said, trying to get a laugh. Celestia just sighed and at that point, she took Blueblood’s fask and took a swig from it. Wiz: The Black Beast was impressive, but Sol's Gear form is leagues above. Recall when Sol turned that Gear the size of Mount Everest into dust. By comparing the size of the Gear to the clouds, we can determine its volume to be around 140 billion cubic meters. Destroying something this size would require more than 85 gigatons of TNT. That's nearly 200 times more powerful than the 9.0 earthquake that hit Japan in 2011. Boomstick: More than enough to take Ragna down... and that was only a fraction of Sol's real power. Ragna just burned out in the end. “Sol too OP. Nerf now,” Pinkie said, holding up a sign that said “Nerf this”. Wiz: The winner is Sol Badguy. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Boomstick: Next time on Death Battle. The group sees a red-haired boy with a gourd controlling sand sand as a weapon then it cuts to a blind girl who can control earth. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ “That was pretty interesting, Twilight. This makes me wish i came by sooner if this is what you were doing,” Blueblood said, getting off the couch and to his hooves. “I would have invited you, but i wasn't sure if you would like this,” Twilight said, walking towards the glowing box. “Well at least you know to invite me another time then,” Blueblood said jokingly, lightly pushing Twilight’s shoulder. “And we'd love to have you watch another episode in the future,” Rarity said, walking beside the two. “Seriously what's taking you guys?” Rainbow asked impatiently, hovering over the box. “Rainbow, you shouldn't yell at the prince and the princesses,” Fluttershy said quietly, looking at Rainbow disapprovingly. Rainbow was about to apologize when Celestia and Luna said, “It's fine.” BlueBlood didn't say anything rude but he did shrug since he was use to this. They gathered around the box once more as the glow stopped. Twilight opened the box and peered inside, but pulled her head out as her horn began to glow. The next moment bunch of stuff. “Looks like we got some posters,” Twilight said, giving them to everyone. “Gonna put this right next to my favorite picture,” Rainbow said, looking at the Sol Badguy poster she got. “Would it be worth it to frame this or not,” Blueblood said quietly, rolling up the Ragna poster. “I think Discord might like this,” Fluttershy said, putting the poster in her saddlebags. “I’ll figure out what to do with this later. Is something wrong, Twi?” Applejack asked, seeing her lavender friend looking inside the box. She watched as Twilight pulled out a small yet wrapped package. “What’cha got, Twi? A package for ya?” Applejack asked curiously. “Yeah. Wonder what it is,” Twilight said, ripping off the wrapping. It took her a few moments to open the package and pull out what was inside, holding it in her hooves. Twilight’s eye began twitching which worried her friends. Starlight, being the closest, walked towards her mentor and asked, “Is everything ok, Twilight?” As she got closer, she saw the book’s title and said, “Complete Guide of Blazblue?” “Yeah. Ha ha. I got the book. Ha ha,” Twilight said, laughing slightly while rocking back and forth. “It’s not like I couldn’t of used this earlier. Ha ha ha,” Twilight said, laughing a little more crazily. Not wanting to deal with anymore insanity, Starlight grabbed Twilight’s shoulders and started to shake her. “Snap out of it, Twilight. We don’t need you going crazy,” Starlight said, between shakes. The others could only watch in either worry for her friends or amusement for the royals. “Stop shaking me, Starlight,” Twilight said, her words sounding like a strange echo. Starlight stopped the shaking as Twilight fell to the floor and said, “Stop the room from spinning.” “That’ll pass momentarily, Twilight. Now we must head back to Canterlot. Hopefully he didn’t cause any damage,” Celestia said, muttering the last part as she gathered hers, her sisters and Bluebloods stuff together. “Did you say something?” Rarity asked, clearly hearing the princess’s mumbles. “Oh just talking to myself. Now we must be leaving as it’s getting a bit late. Until next time my friends,” Celestia said, teleporting herself and her family back to Canterlot. “Is it really that late?” Twilight asked, looking at a clock. True to her former mentor’s words, it was pretty late in the day. “Guess time really does fly, huh? We’ll watch the next episode another time, right?” Twilight asked, looking at her friends. “Sure egghead, but there’s one thing we need to do before we leave,” Rainbow said, hovering in the air. “What?” Twilight asked curiously. “I think she means her black eye. If you don’t mind,” Fluttershy said as Doomguy plushie pointed his small BFG at the lavender princess. “Yeah, you really did a number on her,” Spike said, munching on a gem. “Oh, right,” Twilight said, casting a healing spell on Dash’s eye. In an instant, the black eye was healed as Rainbow said, “Thanks,” and flew home. The rest of her friends said their own goodbyes before leaving as Starlight, Spike and Twilight were the only ones left in the castle. “That was fun,” Twilight said, breaking the silence. “It was besides the part where you lost it,” Spike said sarcastically as Twilight blushed in embarrassment. “Something on your mind, Starlight?” Spike asked, looking at the pink unicorn. “I’m just wondering why no one got something of Sol,” Starlight said, making the dragon and princess think. “You’re right but there’s nothing we can do,” Twilight said, walking up the stairs to her room. The other two went to their own respective rooms for some sleep, unaware that someone did get a Sol Badguy item. Meanwhile in an apartment in an alternate world “Ok, just have to put this piece in here and I’ll be done,” Sunset Shimmer said, trying to reassemble her rifle. There was nothing for the girl, who was a pony, to do so she decided that it might have been the right time to do some maintenance on her gun. Just as she finished, Sunset heard a knocking on her front door as she got up and walked to the door. “If you’re trying to sell me something then get …. lost,” Sunset said, opening the door to find no one there. Seeing that it wasn’t a salesman or the girl scouts, Sunset was about to walk back inside when she saw a box on her doorstep. Grabbing the box, she saw that it was addressed to her and took it inside before closing the door. “Wonder what’s inside,” Sunset said, grabbing a knife and opening the package. With the tape cut, she moved the lids and opened the box to find some white and red clothes. “Strange, but I might as well see what I got,” she said, walking to her room to try on the clothes. After a couple of minutes to change, Sunset stood in front of her mirror to look at her outfit. If anyone were to see her now, they would see her wearing an exact replica of Sol Badguy’s outfit. “These clothes are kinda weird, but they feel so right,” Sunset said, striking a pose. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ CHAPTER END! NEXT TIME GAARA VS TOPH! Gaara vs Toph.We find our group of heroes back in the rec room to enjoy another great episode of Death Battle. But it seems we have some unexpected guest today…. Well unless you’ve been reading the comments then you know who’s appearing this chapter. “So Pinkie… if i may ask, why are your sisters here?” asked Twilight as she look at the Pie sisters all sitting on a extra couch that Twilight had bought for when guest came over to watch Death Battle. The pink party pony was about to answer her bookworm friend until she was interrupted by her more tempermental sister. “well EGGHEAD if you MUST know, Maud said all three of us should visit Pinkie Pie,” snarked Limestone Pie, much to her older sister Maud’s silent charging. And it seems she wasn’t the only one who wasn’t amused by the the middle child of the Pie Family if the flat look the Twilight was giving was any hint at her annoyance “You know i can send you to the Moon for that attitude right?”.said Twilight with a flat tone. And while everyone (minus Maud and Pinkie) were getting a little nervous from the tense atmosphere, Limestone simply gave the princess of Friendship a smirk. “Heh you got a backbone on ya you're Highness, I like that.” said Limestone with a nod of respect. Pinkie being the ever energetic Pony she was couldn't help but bounce in her seat in barely restrained happiness. “YAY! My sis made another friend!” she cheered. “Ah think you might be exaggerating things a little bit sugar cube,” muttered Applejack, to the farm pony all she could see was a fight about to happen. “That’s just how Limestone makes friends…” said Maud in her usual monotone voice as her younger sister Marble nodding shyly in agreement. “Well let’s start the show before this two become any friendlier” muttered Spike as he pressed play. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Interlude (*Cues: Invader - Jim Johnston*) Wiz: Throughout Death Battle, we've seen all manner of weapons and abilities, but these two combatants command the Very Earth around them. Limestone smirked. “This should be interesting...” Boomstick: Gaara of the Desert. “I wonder what he did to get that title?” wondered Rainbow Dash, thinking it would be awesome having a title like “Rainbow Dash of the clouds” Wiz: And Toph Beifong, the Blind Bandit. “I wonder if the dear is really blind?” worried for the fighter if they really did have such a huge disadvantage. Boomstick: He's Wiz and I'm Boomstick. Wiz: And it's our job to analyze their weapons, armor, and skills to find out who would win... a Death Battle. Gaara (*Cues: Akatsuki - Naruto Shippuden*) Wiz: Gaara of the Desert is a short, skinny, pale, stick of a kid, but he's also one of the deadliest shinobi in the world. Boomstick: He looks like a member of Green Day. “Pretty pasty for someone who lived in the desert his whole life...” Rainbow added. “Though he does have that eerie feel, like he could kill you by just glaring at you...” “Meh, living with Maud has taught me that anyone can be deadly even if they look like they are someone who would rather read a book,” said Limestone while giving her older sister a side glance. “Mm-hmm!” agreed Marble. Knowing how strong her older sister was and how deadly she can be if angered…. That poor Dragon who thought it was a good idea to steal the gems in their rock mines. (*Cues: Unknown Theme*) Wiz: Gaara is the son of the Fourth Kazekage, leader of the village hidden in the sand. Born prematurely at the cost of his mother's life, Gaara was destined for a childhood of depression and loneliness from the get-go. “That poor boy...” Fluttershy whimpered as Rainbow wrapped her wing around her. “Life just not fair,” muttered Applejack as she tilted her hat foward to hide the tears welling up. Boomstick: Not even a minute old and already has a kill under his belt. “Boomstick! Not. Cool!” yelled Spike in anger. Boomstick: Though, technically he had a little help. Because... You see... (*Cues: Eerie - Naruto*) Boomstick: As he was being born, his father was like, "Hey! You know what would be awesome? Using ninja magic to seal a horrible monster in my son's belly to turn him into an ultimate weapon!" Gaara: *screams in pain and agony* “What kind of a shit-stain father does that to his kid?!” Limestone snapped. “..... A monster.” said Maud. “Whoa Maud! Calm down,” said Pinkie Pie trying to calm down her sister who was ready to blow her top. Wiz: The process was successful and Gaara became a jinchūriki: human beings who have powerful tailed beasts trapped within them. Gaara's beast was Shukaku, a giant tanuki with power over sand. “Tanukis are sooo cute!” squee Fluttershy. Boomstick: Aww, I want a tanuki as a pet. They're so fluffy and adorable, you just wanna hu-- (Shukaku appears) HOLY SHIT, WHAT IS THAT!? “Dear CELESTIA!” screamed Rarity as she saw one the nine Biju. “.... still cute,” said Fluttershy with a slight daze. Background Age: 19 Full title: Gaara of the Sand Waterfall Birthdate: January 19th Bloodtype: AB Son of the Fourth Kazekage Host of Shukaku Brother of Temari & Kankuro Fifth Kazekage (*Cues: Akatsuki - Naruto Shippuden) Wiz: Shukaku loathed humanity and at first, Gaara had difficulties controlling the monster's rage, accidentally hurting others. As such, he was shunned by his own people, forced to live a secluded life. Boomstick: Well, yeah, I mean, he's got a goddamn tummy monster. It's not like Pepto-Bismol’s solving that. “Not the time for jokes Boomstick,” growled Rarity. (*Cues: Loneliness Theme - Naruto*) Wiz: Convinced his only option was to fight and care for only himself, Gaara became a ruthless killing machine. “No pony should live that life,” whispered Marble in one of her rare moments of speaking. Boomstick: But it's not all bad. Having a digestive desert demon gives him control over all things sand. “That reminds me of the legend of the first Saddle Arabian king,” said Twilight with a smile. “It was once said he defended his Kingdom from dragons by wiping up sandstorms,” “That’s so cool!” cheered Rainbow Dash with stars in her eyes. “Whatever happen to the king?” asked Maud with a surprising interest. Twilight had to think for a bit before answering. “Well legend says that he gave his throne to his younger brother before going on a journey to hunt down a earth pony bandit that could control earth was always challenging the king, but that's all that the legend says,” said Twilight with a shrug. “Hmmm…” hummed Maud. (*Cues: Gaara's Theme - Naruto*) Boomstick: He can wield it as a weapon using his mind to trap and crush his foes, Oh and he can also use it to freaking fly, how the hell does that work? “Same way a unicorn can fly on a carpet or any other object, by standing on it as they make it flout,” said Starlight with a matter of fact tone. Wiz: He can mentally adjust the density of his sand, whether it needs to be lighter than air or stronger than steel, He can even use it to stop bombs powerful enough to wipe out an entire village. He can control any sand in his vicinity using his Chakra, a spiritual energy Shinobi access for Superhuman abilities, such as walking up a tree. “Wait, i’ve seen Pinkie walk up tree’s! Does that make her a ninja too…” wondered Rainbow Dash. “Hahahaha! I’m a ninja! Fear my ninja-tude!” laughed the pink Party Pony. “That's not a real word,” muttered a annoyed Twilight. Boomstick: This guy's like the ultimate emo kid, but I'm not gonna give him too much crap, because he can use existing sand to crush the ground around him for even more sand, so he's never without easy access to ammo. Despite this, he still carries a gigantic gourd of sand on his back. Wiz: It's huge! You'd think that'd be hard on his spine. Interestingly enough, its unique shape and size is a reference to how in Japanese folklore, Tanuki's were considered to be so well endowed they'd have to sling their testicles over their shoulders… “WAIT, WHAT!?” yelled most of the group. “EWW!!” said Rarity. “MY EYES!! CANNOT UNSEE!!” Spike screamed. “That's just disgusting.” Maud said, her eye slightly twitching. Boomstick: Awesome... “Dude! Not awesome,” said a green face Spike. Wiz: But the thing is, Gaara's gourd is not carrying any ordinary testicles, I mean sand! A small portion of the group cracked up at this. Wiz: Gaara has infused his own Chakra into the gourd sand. Boomstick: This directly links it to Gaara, making it much easier for him to control. He's so skilled with it, he can even forge weapons from it, bury people underground or send it into another person's bloodstream and control them like some sort of puppet, talk about an itch you're not gonna scratch. “That’s some scary power right there,” muttered Limestone while everyone else agreed. (*Cues: Akatsuki - Naruto Shippuden) Wiz: Also, Gaara eventually battled and defeated his own father who happened to be a zombie at the time, His father used a Magnetic Release ability to control gold dust, much like Gaara does sand. “Huh. i guess it makes sense that they would share a similar fighting style,” said Rainbow Dash with a shrug. Boomstick: Even though he can't do the Zombie Dad Magnet thing, Gaara added Gold Dust to his gourd sand anyway, giving him more control over it's weight. Wiz: But wait, there's more, with her dying breath, Gaara's mother somehow imparted her own power into this sand. It became living sand, an extension of her will determined to follow and protect Gaara. It will spring from the gourd to defend him from any danger, regardless of risk and without command. “Nothings stronger than a mother's love,” said Spike while giving Twilight a smile who returned it while also giving him a hug. “And don’t forget father's too!” cheered Rainbow Dash with everyone else agreeing. Arsenal Sand Gourd Johyo rope dart Gold Dust Jutsu Sealing Tag Boomstick: This absolute defensive technique is called... The Absolute Defense, pretty good name really, Gaara sand is so dense and fast, only someone who can move nearly the speed of sound can pass it. “That would take somepony like Rainbow Dash with her speed to get passed it!” gasped Rarity as everyone else were amazed at such a powerful defence. “No wonder he’s so powerful, his Defence is like the saddle arabian king i talked about!” said Twilight in awe. Wiz: Gaara can also use everyday sand to create defences such as his Sand Armor, which encases him in a shell to soften blows, unlike his automatic Absolute Defense, the Sand Armor is self-created, and requires a large amount of his Chakra to maintain. “Sounds like the magic skin layer that the Royal Guard uses to protect themselves,” said Twilight while marveling at Gaara’s powerful defence. “Huh so that's how they're able to take so much punishment when a bad guy shows up,” said Applejack. “Yep! Celestia charges some of her magic into the gems in their chest plate and it cast the spell when they wear the armor,” said Twilight. Happy to teach pony in any subject. Jutsu Armor of Sand Shield of Sand Third Eye Desert Wave Sand Binding Coffin Sand Binding Prison Sand Clone Sand Hail Sand Shuriken Boomstick: Gaara's skill with sand is only limited by how much Chakra he's got left in his system, After running low, he could tag out and give Shukaku a turn fighting, until a group of crazy people literally pulled the sand monster from his body for good, that must've hurt, it's gotta be like twice as bad than that night after Chipotle. Wiz: He died... This shocked the rest of the group and also angered them that someone would do something like that to someone who's suffered like Gaara. Boomstick: Oh... the same then. “Not cool Boomstick,” hissed out Spike. (*Cues: Gaara's Theme - Naruto) Wiz: Turns out losing Shukaku was actually a blessing in disguise (*Cues Gaara's theme again*), after being resurrected, Gaara spent some time re-evaluating his emotional roller coaster of a life, inspired by Naruto Uzumaki, he began to truly understand compassion, his attitude changed, his people began supporting him, he even commanded the Allied Shinobi Forces during the Fourth Great Shinobi War, and like his late father, Gaara also became... Boomstick/Pinkie Pie: A ZOMBIE?! Wiz: Kazekage... Boomstick: DAMN! Well, even non-zombie and missing Shukaku, Gaara still retained his powerful Chakra and skill over sand. Feats & Strengths Achieved Kazekage rank at 15 Protected Sunagakure from Deidara's C3 bomb Sand is faster than the eye can see Held up a falling meteor Defeated Rock Lee & Sasuke Defeated his father, Rasa Regimental Commander of the Allied Shinobi Forces Wiz: In their fight, Gaara was so powerful, his father mistook him for Shukaku itself, despite the sand monster being long gone. “That's saying something if you're compared to a creature that looks like celestia might not even win in a straight fight.” muttered Limestone. Boomstick: Gaara is stronger and smarter than ever, all thanks to his mother's love... I miss Mama Boomstick... “Even somepony like Boomstick has a soft spot for his mother,” said Rarity with a small hint of respect. Wiz: Few can withstand the overwhelming power of this sand shinobi... or Mama Boomstick's cooking. Boomstick: HEY! You're uninvited to Thanksgiving. “I agree that was quite rude Mr.Wiz,” said Fluttershy. Wiz: I never was! Boomstick: Exactly... A person running from Gaara's sand is caught and is pulled back into the dark hallway, screams loudly as Naruto and Shikamaru looked on paralyzed in place, Gaara then silently approaches them from behind and walks past them. “….. I think i peed a little,” muttered Rainbow Dash. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Toph (*Cues: A:TLA - Panda Lily*) Wiz: As the only child of the wealthy Beifong family, Toph was kept a secret from the rest of the world. Hidden away, she was pampered and guarded like a fragile child. Her parents were hopeful she could someday become a noble respected member of Earth Kingdom society. “Pfft! Bor~ing!” said Rainbow Dash. rolling her eyes. Boomstick: But their hopes were pretty much dashed from the moment she popped out. See those faded whites? Yeah, Toph's completely blind. “Poor thing,” said Fluttershy on the verge of tears Lao Beifong: My daughter is blind. She is blind and tiny and helpless and fragile! “She wouldn’t be on this show if she was buster,” snarked Applejack. Boomstick: Still, "fragile" is the last word that I would want to use to describe this chick. Background Age: 12 (Avatar)/88 (Korra) Full name: Toph Beifong Daughter of a prestigious family Extremely acute senses beside sight Former police chief Stage name: The blind bandit Eventually retired to the swamp as a hermit “So she’s a hermit as well? Maybe she’d get along with Zecora,” Twilight said, thinking about her rhyming friend. (*Cues: A:TLA - The Seven Chakras*) Wiz: Frustrated by her parents' stubborn coddling, Toph ran away from home at the age of six and ended up losing her way in a cave, until she was rescued by some giant Badgermoles. Yes, they're badgers and they are moles. “Thank harmony our parents aren’t like that,” Limestone said, leaning back into the couch. “Mmhmm,” Marble hummed from her spot. “Really? It seemed like they were pretty strict to me,” Applejack said, looking at Pinkie’s sisters. “With work and chores, yeah. Other than that, our parents are pretty supportive of us. How else do you think our parents let Pinkie be a party pony or let Maud go to college,” Limestone said, waving her hoof nonchalantly. “Our parents want to make sure we’re safe, but they know we can take care of ourselves,” Marble said, hiding behind her mane. “Besides our father threw wilder parties than Pinkie back in his day,” Maud said, taking her eyes off the screen. “Really?” Applejack asked, not believing what she heard. From what she saw, the old stallion seemed to be a stick in the mud to her. “I’m still trying to figure out how Pa got an elephant into the church,” Pinkie said, scratching her head. Hearing that, Applejack wisely turned back to the screen and decided to forget what she heard. Boomstick: Imagine one of those things burrowing into your home. What kind of pest control do you even call for that? Oh wait, I know. FIRE. “Boomstick no!” screamed Fluttershy. Wiz: Like Toph, Badgermoles are blind. So they took a liking to her. Boomstick: Well, how the hell would they know? Wiz: And as the original artists of the craft, the Badgermoles began her training in the art of earthbending. Toph Practices Earthbending a small rock, and succeeds. “Those critters are some good teachers,” Applejack said as they rest of the group were stunned. (*Cues: A:TLA - Invading the Palace*) Boomstick: These giant varmints taught Toph how to manipulate rock and stone using movements similar to the chu-gar praying mantis martial art, Toph can telekinetically throw, grow, shrink, and alter earth in any conceivable way, making for some pretty down to earth attacks and defenses. “She really “rocks”!” joked Pinkie Pie while everyone else let out a groan. “Dammit Pinkie,” muttered an irritated Limestone. Wiz: The Badgermoles also taught Toph how to see. Boomstick: Wait, these ridiculous creatures are also masters of LASIK surgery?! “No you mouth breather,” muttered Rarity. Wiz: No, Toph does not use her eyes to see, of course, her other senses are extremely accurate, and as a master earthbender, Toph can sense the location of earth anywhere. Even more impressive though, the Badgermoles navigate their tunnels using an earthbending technique known as the Seismic Sense". And Toph quickly picked up on this talent. It's kind of like sonar. It works by detecting the exact location and movement of a person or object through their interaction with the ground. Toph: I feel the vibrations in the earth, and I can see where everything is, you, that tree, even those ants. “WOW… that's impressive fer a blind girl… and so young too…” Applejack smiled, proud to see the girl accomplish such a feat. (*Cues: A:TLA - Yuyen*) Wiz: She feels every movement, every footstep, every heartbeat, so precisely, she can even tell if a person's lying. “She'd make a pretty good detective… or even a Royal Guard!” Spike smiled, imagining how easy it would be to fight crime with such abilities. “Would be pretty useful get farmin’ too…” Applejack added. “She could take care of everything at home easily,” Maud said, nodding to what her cousin said. Bending Arts Earthbending Seismic Toss Earth compression Metalbending Sandbending Mudbending “These bending skill sound very useful,” Starlight said, wondering what other kinds of bending there are. “I wanna learn mudbending,” Pinkie said, hoping on the couch. Maud slowly turned to look at her pink furred sister and said, “No.” Boomstick: A woman who can always tell when i'm lying? No thank you! Toph is so good at this that even her closest friends sometimes forget she's blind. Sokka: *Drops Toph's championship belt to her, but it hits her head and she falls over* Toph: Ow! Sokka: Sorry. “HA!” laughed Rainbow and Limestone. Boomstick: But don't worry, they're reminded. (*Cues: Unknown Theme*) Boomstick: In only six years, Toph had completely mastered Earthbending. She even won the Earth Rumble VI tournament multiple times under her stage name, "The Blind Bandit". “Huh that was the title of the Bandit that the king had a rivalry with,” said Twilight in astonishment. Wiz: But Toph didn't stop her training with just earthbending. At first, softer earth proved difficult for her seismic sense. Toph: I feel the vibrations in the ground with my feet, but this sand is so loose and shifty, it makes everything look fuzzy. “That most of caused them some real trouble.” commented Starlight. Wiz: But she has since demonstrated her mastery in both sandbending and mudbending, she can also change the density of earth from sand to stone and back, and before you start making any density or hardening innuendos, she's twelve. (*Cues: Unknown Theme*) Boomstick: I...okay… “Well, at least he has SOME standards…..” Rarity growled. Boomstick: But her greatest achievement is the discovery of an all-new bending art, one thought to be impossible: Metalbending. “Aw ya now that sounds like something i could get behind,” cheered Limestone with a hoof pump. (*Cues: A:TLA - Yuyen again*) Wiz: By manipulating the earthly composition within, Toph can bend nearly any type of metal just as well as stone, the exception being highly purified metals such as platinum. Boomstick: Toph quickly mastered metalbending, and went on to teach it to others. Wiz: She eventually even founded and led a metalbending police force. “Now that's more like it!” Limestone smirked. “An entire police force that can metalbend? This girl gets shit DONE!” Boomstick: And that's after conquering Earth Rumble IV, holding up a building the size of a castle, defeating an entire army almost single handedly, and dueling King Bumi to a standstill, and that guy's conquered an entire hostile city by himself. “Ok, now I wanna know more about this “Bumi” fellow… sounds like a cool guy!” Pinkie said, thinking the old man looked fun. Feats & Strengths Reigning champ of Earth Rumble Invented Metalbending Dueled Bumi to a draw Held up Wan Shi Tong's library Trained the Avatar in Earthbending Destroyed several Fire Nation Blimps Created the Metalbending Police Force Wiz: Even in her old age, Toph was capable of going one on one with the new Avatar, and her Seismic Sense could locate people across the world. “But…. how….. What?” Twilight began to ask, her hair starting to stick out. Spike rubbed her back and said, “Shhh. Calm down, Twilight.” The act did the trick as Twilight let out a sigh and her mane went back to normal. Boomstick: She knows when I've lied AND where I've been? Women should not have these powers. “Oh i disagree Mr. Boomstick,” giggled out Rarity. Toph: I am the greatest earthbender in the world! Don't you two dunderheads ever forget it! “Booya!” cheered Rainbow Dash. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ The gang were thinking over who they should pick. After much debate, Twilight, Spike, and Fluttershy chose Gaara for his feats of protecting and leading a village. Starlight, Rainbow Applejack and Rarity went with Toph because they felt her accomplishments were more amazing like creating a new art. The Pie sisters didn’t pick and stayed neutral. For some reason it felt wrong to pick between the two combatants. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Death Battle (*Cues: Naruto Shippuden: Clash of Ninja Revolution 3 - Leaf Forest*) Gaara is shown standing alone is a rocky battlefield. At the other end of the battlefield, a building made of rock rises out of the ground. It opens up, and Toph walks out. Toph: Whew, talk about a rough ride. Gaara: You do not belong here. This is sacred ground. Leave. Toph: Pfft. Oh yeah, tough guy? Make me. “She should respect someplace sacred,” muttered Twilight. “Gaara’s is kind of in the right in this fight,” agreed Applejack. (*Cues: Naruto Shippuden: Clash of Ninja Revolution 3 - Forest at Night*) FIGHT! Toph stomps the ground, making a boulder rise up. Toph punches it toward Gaara. She stomps the ground again, summoning two boulders that she hurls at Gaara. Toph punches the ground creating four more boulders and throws them at Gaara. Gaara's sand arises from his gourd and destroys the first three, before creating a shield to protect him from the rest of the boulders. The sand shield shoots Sand Bullets at Toph, who creates a rock to protect herself from the attack. She then punches her stone shield, which flies towards Gaara's position, just before his sand comes down and destroys it in slow motion. “Oh damn! look at that!” yelled Rainbow Dash. “Talk about dishing out dirt,” said Maud, causing most of the group to laugh and Pinkie Pie to Pout. “How was that funner then my puns,” muttered the pink party pony. Gaara: Interesting. She commands stone as fluently as I control sand. Toph: By the way, I can tell you're using your sand to smash up the ground underneath us for more ammo. Pretty smart for a Sandbender. “Not a sand bender,” corrected Spike. “He’s a ninja!” cheered Pinkie Pie. As Toph talks to Gaara, the camera shows Gaara's sand flowing. Toph then enters a fighting stance. Toph: Too bad I'm gonna kick your butt before you can use any of it! “Go blind Bandit!” cheered Rainbow Dash. “Don’t lose Gaara!” yelled Twilight. Toph uses her Earthbending abilities to create sharp rocks to impale Gaara. Gaara dodges and leaps into the air. Gaara: *groans* I can't underestimate her. Gaara uses the Body Flicker Technique to teleport away. Toph stomps the ground to create a large rock. She jumps up and stands on top of the rock, and then commands the rock to move forward. She brings out her steel rope to strike Gaara. Gaara appears after using his jutsu and stands up. Gaara: I need time. Gaara creates a sphere of sand around him. The whip attaches itself to the shield of sand, unable to penetrate it. “Smart. He can protect himself and come up with a plan,” Starlight said, finding the tactic to be the best at the moment. Toph: Huh? The shield creates spikes on the side the steel rope is connected to. Toph: Woah! Toph jumps off the rock and lets go of the steel rope. The rock slams into the shield and breaks. Toph: Whew. Sorry, grumpy. I'm not ready to be a shish kebab just yet! “I’m getting kind of hungry for some kebabs,”muttered Spike while rubbing his stomach. “We’ll get some after this,” Twilight and Starlight said, feeling hungry as well. Toph creates a sand pillar to flatten Gaara's sand shield. It hits it, but the pillar breaks. Toph: Come on! Are you really that scared of a little blind girl? I'm touched. “Wow this girls feisty,” said Limestone with a grin. “I like it!” She runs at Gaara's sand shield and grabs hold of one of Gaara's spikes. She changes the spike's density to make it much harder, spins it around in her hand, and then slams it into the sand sphere, piercing straight through. Gaara flies out of the back. When he stands up once more, Gaara is wearing his sand armor, and it begins to crack. Gaara: Your eyes. Those are not the eyes of loneliness, like mine. They are... blank. Toph: Impressive insight, "Gloomsville". I'm digging the whole "wearing sand" thing though. That's new! “You know if they weren't fighting to the death i beat they would get along,” said Fluttershy. Limestone gave the yellow pegasus a weird look before going back to watching t.v. “i don’t see it.” (*Cues: Hidden Leaf Village Riverside Theme - Naruto Shippuden: Clash of Ninja Revolution 3*) Gaara flies into the air on a cloud of sand, and begins firing sand bullets at Toph. She summons a rock in front of her and holds it up like a shield. Gaara's sand bullets begin to pummel the rock. However, the rock shatters after receiving too many hits, and she is hit by a barrage of sand. Gaara then uses sand to pick up Toph and restrain her. Toph: Hey! No fair! Gaara: You need your arms to control the Earth. I will remove them! “Cold and straight for the most brutal and efficient strategy,” muttered Starlight. “Just like a true military leader,” stated Twilight. Toph lowers the sand's density from inside, and is able to stick her arm out. She then punches the sand and it transforms into stone. She then shatters it, and is released from Gaara's grip. The stone falls to the ground. Toph: Dream on, creep! It will take a lot more sand than that to take me down! Gaara: That's the plan! Gaara uses sand wave to overwhelm Toph. An enormous amount of sand begins rushing towards Toph. “That might be a problem for the girl,” Rarity said as she saw the large sand wave. “Not good,” Maud said, not showing any reaction. Toph: Oh, crud... “Oh crud indeed,” muttered Applejack. Toph creates two stone pillars to protect herself, and before the sand can reach her, she begins wrapping her steel rope around her body. The enormous wave of sand hits. When it clears, a hole opens up in the ground, and Toph rises up on top of a boulder out of the hole, completely covered in solid steel armor. Gaara: Sand coffin! He traps Toph in a giant coffin of sand. Gaara: Sand Burial! The sand constricts tightly around Toph. No sounds can be heard coming from inside. Gaara spins around to face away from her. Gaara: It is done. “It’s never that easy,” Starlight said, thinking about the fight she had with Twilight in Cloudsdale. The ground begins to tremble. Toph leaps out of the sand, and her steel armor shatters and falls to the ground in mid-air. Toph: Jeez! I almost felt that. Gaara: That's Impossible! Toph: Are you kidding? Pay attention, Sandy. I'm about to school you! “Kick his ass,” cheered the rainbow themed Pegasus. (*Cues: Sansukumi - Naruto: Gekitō Ninja Taisen! 4) Toph assumes a horse stance and begins to yell as if she is powering up. A barrage of boulders begin to rapidly rise up out of the ground. Toph launches them all at Gaara. He uses sand to stop them all. Behind him, Toph rises out of the ground on top of a massive earth column. Six more earth columns rise up out of the ground next to her, surrounding Gaara. Gaara attempts to attack Toph with his sand. Just as it is about to hit her, time slows, and Toph reaches out and redirects the sand so it misses her. The sand loops around the pillars, then turns and starts to rush back towards Toph again. The six earth pillars bend down in front of Toph, protecting her, and the sand slams into them harmlessly. Gaara attempts to recover, but Toph appears behind him on another rock pillar, grabbing Gaara by the neck. He struggles, but he can't break free. Toph: Gotcha... Toph uses sandbending to compress Gaara's sand armor down into his body, crushing him within his own armor. As he lets out one last scream and dies, the camera moves upwards as blood comes out from under the screen. The scene then fades back to Toph, who throws Gaara's sand armor down at the ground. As it hits the ground, it makes the sound of porcelain/glass shattering. Toph: That's how it's done! “He’s not getting up from that,” Maud said, still stoned faced. K.O.! Results (*Cues: A:TLA - Season 3 Main Theme*) Boomstick: Aww, oh (bleep) (bleep) (bleep) (bleep) god-damn (bleep) son of a (bleep) (bleep) weasel! Why did another anime character have to lose?! “Oh wow Boomy’s taking this lost very hard,” said a wide eyed Pinkie Pie. Wiz: Yeah... but, here's why... Gaara's sand is monstrous and its speed and power could easily obliterate most foes, but with Toph, it's another story. Boomstick: Really? She's freaking blind for God's sake, and he can fly! Wiz: Ohoho! In the OFFICIAL "Behind The Scenes extras" of the Avatar: Book 2 DVD we found this... A small caption on the screen says "Did you know? Toph can feel the Earth even if it isn't connected to the ground?" “SERIOUSLY!?” Rainbow shouted, her jaw close to hitting the floor. Wiz: Toph can feel the Earth, even if it isn't connected to the ground. Boomstick: Toph is tough, but her real strength lies in her precision and technique, and with her Earthbending and Seismic Sense, she could see Gaara's attacks coming the instant they began, regardless of if he was in the air. “But unless she can move at the speed of sound or at least close to that she shouldn't be able to dodge it,” said Twilight as she tried to understand the logic behind this outcome. Wiz: And while Gaara's chakra-infused sand is controlled by his late mother, it's still sand. Just like in an Earthbending duel, Toph was able to influence it long enough to misdirect or block attacks. Also remember, Gaara added his father's Gold Dust to the mix, giving Toph two different bending options, just in case. Unlike Platinum, Gold contains traces of Iron and Copper,and can be metal-bent. “So by that logic, Gaara hindered himself in this fight.” Rainbow mused to herself. Boomstick: To top this off, Gaara keeps himself covered in his Sand Armor, so Toph could always sense where he was. “Kinda like in Kratos vs Spawn where he was able to feed of Kratos’ sins since he was covered in them…” Applejack added. Wiz: And it's specifically stated that the Sand Armor uses up large amount of Gaara's own Chakra, not his Mother Sand, so when he ran low on Chakra, it became difficult to maintain. Thus, Toph had no problem turning Gaara's greatest defense into his worst weakness. Boomstick: Gaara couldn't sand up to Toph, Ahaha! I know you're floored, I really ground that one in, didn't I? What can I say, It's my Earthly Delight. "HA GOOD ON BOOMY!" laughed Pinkie Pie. Wiz: Ugh... The winner is Toph Beifong. Boomstick: No need to gravel about it, can't we just bury the hatchet? I'm out. "the puns.... they hurt." said Maud. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Boomstick: Next time on Death Battle! The preview cuts to a scene in space with an orange space ship. “Doesn’t that ship look familiar?” Applejack asked, squinting at the ship. The others, besides the other Pie sisters and Starlight, looked at the ship in interest. The next scene showed another familiar ship behind the orange one. It then cuts to an armored being falling from the sky, onto the ground in a kneeling position. The being slowly looked up, showing a familiar visor. “Wait is that….,” Spike said, watching the preview unfold. Bountyhunter. The group saw a slow shot of a jetpack with a scarf flapping in the wind. Then it showed the opponent's armor and gun as the groups eyes widened Vs Bounty Hunter The following scene showed the opponent and the girls, and dragon, were shocked at who it was. “Boba Fett!!!” Rainbow yelled, flying into the air in shock. They watched as they saw Samus and Boba shooting at each other with explosions going off in the background. Samus gets up from a huge blast as her armor falls off, revealing a skin tight blue suit underneath it. Samus VS Boba Fett! REMASTERED! The main group was left speechless before they broke out in wild cheers. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ “That was interesting,” Maud said flatly, looking at her younger sisters. “You’re damn right that was. Gotta give it to the blind girl, She can really dish out the punishment,” Limestone said, jumping off the couch and landing on the floor. “Hmm,” Marble mumbled, watching Pinkie and the others walking to a glowing box. Limestone saw where the girls were going and asked, “What’re you doing by that box?” “We’re going to the box cause it gives us a lot of free stuff after each episode and we’re going see what’s inside. C’MON,” Pinkie said, hopping towards the box. The sisters of the pink party pony started to walk towards the box as Pinkie hopped towards it and opened it. “What did we receive, darling?” Rarity asked, trying to look into the box. Luckily she wasn’t close as Pinkie popped out of the box and landed next to the fashionista. Not phased by tis, Rarity calmly asked, “Did you find anything?” “I found comics,” Pinkie said, throwing a bunch to everyone. “Oh there were a few other things,” Pinkie said, jumping back into the box. “What is is? Manuals on earthbending?” Twilight asked excitedly. “Scrolls on ninja jutsus?” Rainbow asked, equally as excited as Twilight. “A tanuki?” Fluttershy asked causing everyone to shiver. “Nope. It’s some stuff for my favorite sisters in the whole wide world,” Pinkie said, jumping out of the box with a small sack on her back. “There’s something for us?” Maud asked, showing the very tiniest bit of confusion on her face. “Really? What is it?” Limestone asked, walking to the sack and opening it. Inside the sack was a book, a bag, four thin black bands and a note. “What’s this?” Limestone asked, taking the note and looking at it. “What does it say, Limey?” Pinkie asked, trying to look over Limestone’s shoulder. “Dear Pie Sisters. In this bag there’s one meteor bracelet for each of you, even you Pinkie. The book is for Maud and it’s the earth pony king’s diary. There’s a note in the book for you so read it. And finale for the tough pony reading this note, the bag holds some special rocks and soil from Sunagakure. Hope you enjoy the stuff. Crazy Love, Deadman,” Limestone said, her sisters putting on their bracelets. Maud picks up the book and looks at it as Twilight slowly walks forward and says, “Boooook.” Maud boops the princess on the nose and says, “Bad princess.” That stopped the lavender princess as the rest of the group started to giggle or in Rainbow’s case, fall over laughing. “We might as well get going,” Maud said, getting ready to go. Her sisters were above to walk out the door when Pinkie landed in front of them. “WAIT! You said we would all go to the lake to swim and hang out!” cried Pinkie Pie as she gave her sisters a pout. “Damn i hope you would of forgot,” muttered Limestone. “To late we might as well go…” said Maud, much to pinkie’s joy and lime’s annoyance. (later at the lake) We find the group at the lake enjoying the sun and taking a nice dip in the lake. Well most of the group was, Maud simply sat under the beach umbrella that Spike was kind enough to provide her as she read her new book. Like the note suggested she went to the last page. “After giving my throne to my younger brother, I went to search of my rival, the blind bandit, to end our rivalry once and for all. Of course she was at her usual spot, where she trained, and we started our fight. It was a fight I knew would end in her favor, but I decided to put everything into a trump card so to say. I would end our rivalry with one simple question." (15o0 years ago.) “Would you marry me?” asked a pale colored equine with a red mane and wearing brown robes fit for a king. “Wha? What did you say Gloomsville?” said a grey earth pony with a black mane as she stared at the equine with her milky colored eyes. The boulder next to her fell to the ground, creating a sizable crater. (back to the present.) Maud had an amused Smile as she continued to read. “I’ll never forget the look on her face and the blush she had. She began to sputter while calling me a fool for asking such a question during battle. I told her i didn’t care and wanted an answer even if i had to defeat her to get it.” “She agreed after going on how it was out of pity because in her words “a gloomy guy like me would never have a chance with a girl otherwise.” We agreed to leave my old kingdom behind and head to the new kingdom of equestria where we would settle down. I hear Rock farming was a good option for earth Ponies.” Maud stared at the last page for a moment before closing it and putting it in her saddle bags. With nothing else to do, she saw a few small rocks near her and had an interesting thought. Maud held out her hoof towards the rocks and they started to float and then turn into turn into sand. “Hmm.” hummed Maud in thought before she heard her sister Limestone’s foul mouth cursing from the Lake. with a sigh she got up to see what happen and on her way she could only wonder why Limestone had to inherit their great (add in a few more greats) grandmother Toph’s foul temper. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ CHAPTER END! NEXT TIME-TIME-TIME!!!!!!!! (ERROR!) “Hahahaha next chapters a surprise kiddies!” laughed deadman now wearing a suit straight from the 80’s. a light gray unbuttoned suit with a maroon undershirt with the first three buttons unbuttoned. “Did you really have to do that?.... And have to wear that stupid getup?” asked Trepp. “HEY! YOU WILL RESPECT THE SAME SUIT THAT THE GREAT KAZUMA KIRYU WEARS!” yelled the mad god. “Sigh… anyway we will be doing a none reaction chapter next just to do something new and fun so we don’t get bored,” said the bored chaos god. “And with that we-” “Goodnight mutherfuckers! Ahhhhh!!!!!!” screamed that mad god as he rammed his face into the camera causing the screen to show nothing but static. Boba Fett VS Samus Aran RemasteredA brand new day, that meant Twilight and her friends were getting ready to watch the next episode. They were just finishing up with setting their snack table as each of them took a seat. “Is everyone ready for the next episode?” Twilight inquired, looking at all of her friend’s excited faces. Before anypony or dragon could say anything, a strange magical hum was heard, causing them to look at the mirror portal. The girls, one dragon and a plushie holding a small BFG were standing there, ready to fight off anything that walks though it. A moment later, a unicorn mare with a light ember coat and a red and yellow mane walked through the mirror. “Sunset?” Twilight inquired, shocked at who it was. “Hey, Twilight. How’s it going?” Sunset questioned, walking towards her princess friend. “I’m surprised you’re here, Sunset. Why’re you here? Is something wrong?” Twilight rambled, flying towards her friend in worry. “Everything’s fine, Twilight. I just needed to get out of the house for awhile and thought that I could stay here for a bit,” Sunset reassured, calming down her friend. “I have the sirens at my place and they’re all on their periods.” “How bad can it be?” Spike inquired, shrugging his shoulders. “Well…” trailed off Sunset as she thought back on how bad it was that it made her have to leave. ~~~~~~~~~~~{an hour ago in the human world, outside Sunset’s apartment.}~~~~~~~~~~~ “RAAAWR!” bellowed three voices that sounded like the unholy offspring of Godzilla passing a kidney stone and Scott Mcneil(1) with such intensity that it shook the apartment building. Standing in front of said building was one wide eyed Sunset who was sweating buckets. “Nope!” said the baconed haired girl as she quickly made her way to somewhere safe. She wondered how her friend Twilight was doing and if she was willing to let her crash for a bit until things cooled down. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ “Let’s just say i’d rather spend time fighting dragons and leave it to that,” muttered the former student of Celestia right before getting swept into a near bone crushing hug from Twilight. “Oooh! Who cares about why you're here!?” said the Princess of friendship. “It’s been so long since we saw each other, let’s just enjoy the time we have.” “Sure, so what’re you doing here? Shouldn’t you be outside or something?” Sunset wondered, looking at all the pony versions of her friends. “We’re gonna watch Death Battle,” Pinkie cheered, jumping in the air and waving her hooves. “Death Battle? You’ve got my interest,” Sunset mentioned, grinning at the title alone as she followed Twilight to the couch. “C’mon and watch with us. As Pinkie would say,” Twilight began, taking a seat as Sunset did the same. “The more the merrier,” Sunset and Twilight quoted before giggling. Spike sighed and pressed play on the remote, starting the next episode. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ For Inspiring us For Encouraging us For Teaching us We Dedicate this to you Monty Oum ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ “Huh? Who's this Monty guy?” asked a confused Rainbow Dash. “Don’t know but he must be somepony important if their dedicate this episode to him.” said Twilight with a shrug. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Interlude (*Cues: Invader - Jim Johnston*) Boomstick: Bounty hunting, one of the most respected and fun jobs in the world. “This guy has a very bizarre idea of fun…” Sunset sighed before giving it more thought. ‘Though it DOES sound kinda fun.’ “And my cousin Braeburn says some bounty hunter are just as wanted then the varmints they bring in,” said Applejack. Wiz: I don't know about respected, but certainly a daring profession only for the strong and bold. Boomstick: Boba Fett, the most feared bounty hunter in the galaxy. Wiz: And Samus Aran, a hunter so determined she'll sacrifice a planet to reach her goal. “More like planets tend to explode the moment she gets what she wants out of it…” Twilight added. Boomstick: He's Wiz and I'm Boomstick. Wiz: And it's our job to analyze their weapons, armor, and skills to find out who would win... a Death Battle. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Boba Fett (*Cues: Unknown Theme*) Wiz: Boba Fett is a natural in more ways than one. He was not born into the galaxy, rather, created, as a clone of the fearsome bounty hunter Jango Fett. Boomstick: Not fearsome enough, though. He tended to get a-head of himself...Hehehe… “Oh for the love of-show some tact you jerk!” Sunset snapped upon seeing the Bounty Hunter's father meet his untimely demise. “I thought you liked puns,” said a confused Applejack. Sunset gave the farm pony a side glance. “Only when they're in good taste,” she muttered. Wiz: As his "father", Jango taught Boba all he knew about his profession, and despite being orphaned at age ten, Boba continued to live the hunter's life, eventually donning his father's armor and claiming his rightful place as the greatest bounty hunter in the galaxy. Background Age: 35 (Cannon)/76 (Legends) Height: 6'0" / 1.83 m Weight: 172 lbs / 78.2 kg Rank: Mandalore Starship: Slave I Homeworld: Kamino Clone of Jango Fett Widower to Sintas Vel Father to Ailyn Vel Boomstick: Complete with the most badass space-suit ever, his Mandalorian armor. “Daddy must be so proud…” Spike stated. “I’ll say!” said Sunset with a wide grin as she admired the armor. “Uh Sunset, your drooling…” muttered Fluttershy. (*Cues: The Battle of Hoth (Part 1) - Star Wars Episode V*) Boomstick: It's got a micro energy field that disperses impacts, and is made up of Mandalorian iron. Wiz: Okay, at this point, I think it's safe to assume every universe has some metal stronger than titanium. Though, to this one's credit, it's actually a lot heavier, sacrificing mobility for durability. In fact, it's so durable it resists lightsabers... you know, the swords that can cut through anything. “Man that's still so cool!” cheered Rainbow Dash as she admired the suit and imagine kicking flank in it. Mandalorian Body Armor Made of Mandalorian Iron Micro energy field Penetrating radar Resists fire, poison, acid, & cold 360 degrees field of vision Infrared sensor Environmental filter Can track 30+ targets at once Retractable drinking straw (*Cues: Unknown Theme*) Boomstick: His gauntlets house a flamethrower, fiber cord whip, and numerous concussion and stun missiles. But his weapon of choice is his EE-3 carbine rifle, which Fett often cradles like a child. There there, EE. Daddy's here. Killin' time soon. Wiz (and Twilight): That's... creepy. ‘That reminds me I have to tuck Gladys in tonight before going to bed,’ thought sunset as she thought of her precious Springfield Armory M1911A1. ‘Also need to watch Sin city again, That movie is lit as fuck~!’ she sang in her head as she continued watching the show. Weaponry EE-3 carbine rifle Sacros K-11 blaster pistol Concussion grenade launcher Lightsabers Wrist Gauntlets Flame projector Fibre Cord whip Wrist laser Concussion rockets Stun rockets (*Cues: Star Wars: The Clone Wars - Sky Battle of Quell*) Boomstick: However, my favorite thing in Boba's bag is his badass jetpack. “Ah ya flying for the win!” cheered Rainbow Dash, leaping in the air and doing a backflip. “Show off,” muttered an annoyed Applejack “You're just mad because you don't have one.”mocked the blue flyer. Wiz: Which he uses for short-range travel, and to gain a mobility advantage over his foes. While it can only hold enough fuel for a single minute's worth of flight, its velocity reaches up to 90 miles per hour. Mitronomon Z-6 Jetpack Hands-free Up to one minute of flight Max speed: 90 mph / 145 kph Magnetic Grappling hook Anti-vehicle homing rocket “Pssshh. C’mon and give me some real G-force,” Rainbow mocked, crossing her hooves. “Oh Twilight…” Pinkie began. “I don't suppose you could build me one of those jet packs…” “No Pinkie.” said the young Princess. Boomstick: The jetpack also has a single anti-vehicle homing missile, because when you've got space for a missile, why not? “Because the world needs more explosions,” stated Spike in a sage like voice getting some cheers from the more wild members of the group. “Speak the truth bratha!” yelled Pinkie as she gave Spike a high five… and to those in the comments telling me i’m using the wrong term because one of them is a pony and doesn't have hands, then you can just bite me. Wiz: In short, Boba Fett is a human swiss army knife. He's killed hundreds of criminals, politicians, and Jedi, and battled Mace Windu to a draw when he was only 12 years old. Boomstick: An accomplishment so manly, it instantly kick-started his puberty. “That would happen to anybody,” agreed Sunset, because a 12 year old fighting Samuel Jackson from space is probably one of the most badass things out there. “Don’t you mean ANYPONY?” asked Twilight with a raised brow. “Fuck you i know my terminology!” shot back Sunset, surprising most of the group with her sudden change in attitude. ‘Fuck i’m acting like church again!’ the former apprentice of Celestia panicked in her mind. (*Cues: Unknown Theme*) Wiz: But for all his skill, Fett has one great, inescapable weakness: the Sarlacc Pit. This flaw is so unavoidable, he was knocked into the pit by a blind and physically drained Han Solo while wearing a jetpack. Boomstick: And since Disney bought Star Wars and nixed the expanded universe, this is where Boba Fett's story officially ends. “Wait, seriously!?” Rainbow groaned. “THAT SUCKS!!” Sunset cried in outrage. “RIOT!” yelled Pinkie while brandishing a pitchfork. “You are not starting another riot in my Castle Pinkie!” yelled Twilight, horn blazing with energy. (*Transition appears*) Wiz: Well, that's stupid, so here's what happened in the expanded universe! “YES!!!” Sunset and Rainbow cheered. (*Transition disappears*) (*Cues: Star Wars: The Clone Wars - Duel of the Droids*) Wiz: Using a combination of his jetpack and blowing himself up, Fett actually escaped the Sarlacc, he later became leader of the Mandalorian warriors after the Galactic Civil War, and even held his own against Darth Vader.... twice. “Ok, we've GOT to see this Vader guy in this show soon!” Starlight stated. “Agreed. I’m curious about him as well,” Twilight commented, wondering what the black wearing person’s story could be. Boomstick: While using one of several lightsabers he's taken from his Jedi kills, and that's pretty goddamn impressive, but you know what's even more impressive? The time he trained Han Solo's Jedi daughter so that she could kill an evil all-powerful Sith Lord, who just so happened to be her own brother! Spoilers. “Glade my Twilight isn't here, she hasn’t read anything from the expanded universe yet,” muttered Sunset. Boomstick:Unfortunately, Fett's greatest weakness still remains that toothy sand vagina. “Snrk!” Sunset tried and failing at the name Boomstick gave the Sarlacc pit. (*Cues: Star Wars Episode V - Departure of Boba Fett (Boba Fett's Theme)*) Wiz: He has fallen into the Sarlacc a total of three times... three. And the Sarlacc's not exactly running around looking for snacks. It's a friggin' hole in the ground! “That's just stupid.” said Applejack with a flat look. “Who could be that stupid to fall in the same hole three times?” asked Rarity. “Oh you would be surprised…” muttered Sunset as she thought of a certain group of morons in space located in a boxed canyon. Boomstick: And again, he can fly! Fun fact: Every year following his escape, Boba Fett returns to the planet Tatooine just to shoot the Sarlacc. In his spaceship. From orbit. He's learned his lesson, he's staying as far away from that shit as he possibly can. Everyone couldn't help but chuckle at this. “Can we all just agree that we might do something similar if we were in his shoes?” Giggled Starlight. “Hahaha, ya.” laughed Spike wiping away a tear. Wiz: Fear of teethy holes aside, few have survived once he's set his sights on them. Boba Fett is a whole new meaning of deadly. Darth Vader: No disintegrations. Boba Fett: As you wish. “Aw, but I wanna disintegrate them!” Said Rainbow in a mock Boba Fett voice. “No, bad Boba! No disintegration!”Sunset replied in her own mock Darth Vader voice, playfully hitting her with a newspaper. Everyone couldn't help but giggle at the antics of the two. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Samus Aran (*Cues: Title Screen Theme - Metroid: Other M*) Wiz: When she was young, Samus Aran lived with her family on Earth colony K-2L... until one fateful day it was sacked by an army of space pirates led by the vile Ridley, a giant purple space dragon. “Looks like a fucked up Pterodactyl to me,” said Sunset off handedly before looking the real purple dragon in the room. “Or maybe a grown up Spike on meth.” “Hey!” yelled said dragon, he didn’t even know what meth was. Boomstick: Ridley murdered her parents right in front of her along with the rest of the planet. Literally everyone except for Samus. So PTSD therapists were in pretty short supply. “I'd love to see Ember put this jerk in his place!” Spike scoffed, mentally picturing his friend wailing on the evil space dragon with her scepter. Wiz: Thankfully, Samus was rescued by the Chozo, bird-like aliens who raised her to become a warrior. Background Age: 32 Height: 6'3" / 1.9 m Weight: 198 lbs / 89.8 kg Homeworld: Colony K-2L Starship: Gunship Cybernetically enhanced Infused with Chozo & Metroid DNA (*Cues: Theme of Samus Aran - Super Smash Bros. Wii U*) Wiz: She was infused with Chozo DNA, increasing her strength, speed, and athletic abilities far beyond those of a normal human being. Boomstick: So... does she like... now have a bad habit of pecking at food and shitting on people's' cars? “I certainly hope not,” Rarity groaned, shaking her head in irritation. Wiz: No. She wears the Power Suit, typically in Varia form, shielding her entire body without restricting any movement or flexibility. Power Suit Little restriction to movement or flexibility Variants Varia - Environmental protection Gravity - Stimulates normal gravity Dark - Reduces Dark Aether damage Light - Immune to Dark Aether Fusion - Absorbs X Parasites Zero - Worn underneath Power Suit Boomstick: Too bad it makes her look like a dude. “Yeah, and her zero suit looks so… *licks lips*good~,” said Sunset as she started to stare off into space. “Umm sunset? You ok?” asked a worried Spike as he snapped his fingers in front of her face to get her attention. Through the young dragons efforts Sunset was able to snapped out of her little day dream and give the group a sheepish smile. “Sorry about that, i was just thinking… happy thoughts,” said Sunset with a small blush. “What did the human world do to you?” asked a weirded out Starlight, wondering what happened in the other world that changed Sunset from the pony she hung out with during her time in the human world. “More like what DIDN’T it do to her?” joked Pinkie. Getting a few sighs or some blushing faces for her efforts, but Sunset’s reaction was the most… interesting. “Bow chicka wow wow~!” Sang Sunset before she cover her mouth with a wide eyed look. “What in the hay was that?” asked Applejack with a raised brow. “And why do i have a sudden urge to punch something aqua colored?” Growled out Rarity…. Prompting Rainbow Dash to move away... Wiz: Though underneath, she wears the skintight Zero Suit. Boomstick: There we go! They must call it that because there's literally zero left to the imagination. “Mmm… indeed it does~” Sunset whispered to herself, imagining Twilight wearing such an outfit… right before shaking her head. “Dear Fausticorn I've been hanging around Adagio too long…” Spike let out a quick whistle when Samus in her Zero suit was shown, then immediately blushed when he heard most of the group giggle at the young drake's reaction to the beautiful bounty hunter. “Hehehe what can i say? she’s pretty.” said the drake with a blush. “Agreed,” whispered Fluttershy quietly, but apparently not quietly enough if the grin and knowing look Sunset was sending her way was any indication. Boomstick: While in that Zero Suit, she carries a paralyzer pistol, a gun which... can... well... paralyze people. And turn into a laser whip. “Crack dat whip!” Applejack cheered, earning a giggle from Starlight. Wiz: But she definitely prefers the Power Suit in most combat situations. As a modified version of Chozo battle armor developed specifically for Samus, it can also be upgraded to adapt to any environment. “Wish we had that kind of armor,” Spike and Rainbow grumbled while crossing their arms and hooves respectively… while Twilight, Starlight, and Sunset started taking down notes. (*Cues: Brinstar (Metroid) - SSB Wii U*) Boomstick: Samus carries the powerful Arm Cannon as her primary weapon and she's found quite a few upgrades for it over the years. So the basic power beam is a peashooter. When you charge it up, it'll blow your face clean off. She can also set it to blast an ice beam, grapple beam, and tons of seeking and super missiles. Arsenal Arm Cannon Power Beam Charge Beam Ice Beam Grapple Beam Missiles Wiz: Her Chozo training let's Samus control the skies with her speedy screw attack and curl into her morph ball form to traverse places few others can. Morph Ball Diameter: 3 ft / 1 m Power Bombs Screwattack Speed Booster Paralyzer pistol Boomstick: How the hell does she do that?! “Several decades of yoga?” Sunset suggested. “Why would you think that?” asked Twilight. “Well that's what Adagio says when she explains her flexibility,” explained Sunset with a perverted grin. “...oh my,” muttered Fluttershy while being a blushing mess like the rest of the group, save for Rainbow Dash, who had a wide shit-eating grin... Wiz: Bird DNA, Boomstick. Bird DNA. Boomstick: Yeah, because we all know how many times you scare a bird in the parking lot and then it just curls up into a ball and zooms away! Wiz: ALIEN bird DNA. “Maybe it's a Bird-Hedgehog hybrid?” Fluttershy suggested. Boomstick: Well then F**k that planet and its birds! But I do like their power bombs, which Samus carries and can be used to destroy anything in the general vicinity in seconds. Wiz: Samus is known as a bounty hunter capable of taking on impossible missions, fighting massive beasts, and even wiping out an entire species. Boomstick: All but one. Talk about having the rarest pet in the universe, and it makes a cute hat. “It looks cute enough,” Fluttershy muttered, seeing the baby metroid. “Not sure if I want that for a hat though,” Sunset admitted, shivering a little at the sight of the metroid’s teeth. “Yeah, it looks like something that would suck out your brain.” Pinkie added. Wiz: However, she often makes mistakes. Somehow, she always seems to lose all her power-ups and upgrades at the beginning of every mission. “Thats… so stupid,” muttered Sunset. “How do you lose all of those every time you went on a mission? Who was she, Kratos?!” Boomstick: How has she not gotten a purse yet? “How have you not learn to shut the fuck up yet?” spat Rarity, ya she was sore from that comment from the first episode. Wiz: Well even when she does have all her arsenal at her disposal, it doesn't guarantee its use. For example, she once entered a volcano and did not activate her thermal systems until halfway through the mission. All because she was waiting for permission. Everyone slapped their heads at Samus’s obvious weakness. “Are you kidding!?” Rainbow snapped. “As someone who works with the Wonderbolts I know it's imperative that you follow the orders of your superiors. But even WE know that there are times we need to make spur-of-the-moment decisions in life or death situations!” Boomstick: Ugh, can we please not talk about that game? Wiz: But don't worry. Samus has proven time and time again to be one of the deadliest hunters in the galaxy. Outlaws everywhere fear the name of Samus Aran. Samus: Time to go! Samus' visor shines, covering her face, and she prepares her arm cannon, which fires a charge shot at the screen. “SO…. AWESOME!” cheered Rainbow Dash. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ “Call me biased, but I think Samus will win this one.” Rainbow proclaimed, while the rest of the group talked amongst themselves. “Well the rest of us believe that this fight will end just like the original episode so we're just going to watch the show,” declared Twilight as everyone else settled down to enjoy the show. “I just what to see a bloodbath,” said Sunset with a shrug, and magic herself some popcorn. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Death Battle (*Cues: Unknown Theme*) Samus' ship is flying in the middle of space. Samus sits in the cockpit, looking over a green virtual screen. From behind comes Slave I, where inside Boba Fett is looking over a virtual screen of his own. Suddenly, Samus hears an alarm going off in her ship, but is too late to act, for Slave I has fired multiple blasts at Samus' ship, which is disabled and is send falling towards an unknown planet. On the planet's surface, it appears to be a futuristic city. “Huh? it’s starting out just like the first version,” commented Twilight as soon a she noticed the similarities between the two versions. “But prettier,” added Fluttershy as she was dazzled by the visual upgrade. Planet Name: Unknown Location: Unknown Life Forms: Unknown “Wow… that’s... some helpful information,” said Starlight wondering why the show bothered to show the info if it was all unknown. Samus' ship crashes through a small tower, then crash lands onto a rooftop, grinding across before flipping over and falling off. The entire vehicle explodes, but Samus had jumped out just in time, landing on the rooftop while leaving a small crater. She gets up and turns behind her at the fiery wreckage of her ship. “Oh he’s so dead.” stated Sunset with a glare. If there was one thing that Sunset learned ever since she started to live in the human world besides that cute nerdy girls where all screamer in bed, NEVER fuck with someone’s ride. Boba Fett, who had parked Slave I, hovers downward with his jetpack with his EE-3 carbine rifle in his hands and lands. He walks slowly towards Samus while she prepares her arm cannon. “Kick his ass Samus!” cheered Rainbow Dash while pooling a “go go Samus” number 1 glove out of nowhere, she’d even got one for Fluttershy who shyly waved her arm in support of the female bounty hunter, even the Doomguy Plushie was holding a Samus flag in it’s little arms. FIGHT! Samus charges her arm cannon, then fires a shot and follows up with two more. Boba Fett steps to the side to avoid them, then fires back. Samus rolls out of the way and fires a large beam from her arm cannon, but Boba Fett flies up into the air with his jetpack to avoid it. Suspending himself in midair, he continues firing downward at Samus, who runs toward him while avoiding his fire. In response, he launches his anti-vehicle homing rocket from his jetpack at her. As it is about to hit, Samus vaults over a part of the building, narrowly dodging the rocket as it explodes, destroying the very object she used. “EXPLOSIONS!” cheered Pinkie Pie as she and Spike marveled at the explosions. “Suck it Michael Bay you bush league Director,” snarked Sunset. To tell the truth it was just an excuse to rib on said Director. Samus leaps into the air towards Boba Fett and strikes him with her left arm, then flips over and kicks him downward towards the rooftop below them. Boba quickly gets back onto his feet as Samus herself lands. She fires another beam at Boba, who jumps and flips over to avoid it before firing a missile at her. Samus rolls to avoid it, then goes into her morph ball form. He continues to fire more missiles at Samus, but her morph ball mode proves too nimble to be hit. Once Samus reaches Fett, she exits morph ball mode and flip kicks him twice, the second of which Fett appears to have blocked. Despite this, her next kick knocks Fett into the air, sending him rolling across the rooftop that Slave I is on while dropping his rifle. However, Fett lets go of a grenade pin upon stopping his movement and Samus soon sees a thermal detonator at her feet about to detonate. It explodes, causing a massive explosion. “Oh shit! Is Fett actually going to win!?” yelled a surprised Rainbow Dash. “I goess we were wrong in assuming it was going to be the same outcome.” muttered Applejack. “Don’t think it’s over just yet,” said Fluttershy, drawing everyone's attention back to the show. However, the explosion did not defeat his opponent; it seriously damaged her armor, revealing her Zero Suit, (Much to Spike,Fluttershy, and Sunset’s delight.) to which Boba Fett realizes that Samus is a woman. After all of her armor pieces, save for her boots, have broken off from her, Samus leaps upward with her boots, whose jets allow her to hover and lands on the rooftop Fett is on. She then takes out her paralyzer pistol, to which Boba Fett responds by taking out and activating a lightsaber, then twirling it. Samus fires her paralyzer pistol at him, but Fett manages to deflect them efficiently as he runs toward her. Samus decides to fly towards him using her boots, preparing to kick just as Fett swings his lightsaber. The two clash and the impact knocks both back. “Wow this is way more intense,” muttered Rarity as most of the group was fixated on the fight. ‘This is getting almost as good as the three way fight with Tex, Washington, and the Meta.’ thought Sunset as she thought back on the show her and her friends were watching back home. Samus quickly transforms her paralyzer pistol into her laser whip, though it takes on the form of a beam sword. The two clash with their sabers with neither seeming to have the edge, so Boba prepares his wrist-mounted flamethrower. He fires large waves of fire at Samus, who leaps over, rolls, and jumps to avoid them. Fett continues firing it as Samus wall jumps off of Slave I. In midair, she changes her laser whip back into the paralyzer pistol and fires it at Fett's wrist, disabling his wrist-mounted flamethrower. Upon landing, she transforms the pistol back into a beam sword and the two clash with their blades once again until Samus leaps over a swing and kicks Fett. She gets into a crouched position, charges her paralyzer pistol and fires the ice beam at Fett, who is completely frozen in place by it. She charges her paralyzer pistol, then fires it at Fett's head, causing it to explode, which is shown at three different angles. Afterward, Samus gets up and turns away. “Huh so it did end the same way,” muttered Twilight while everyone else was cheering like crazy. K.O.! “Samus wins!” cheered Rainbow Dash as she did a flying backflip. Samus Aran walks away as Boba's headless body completely shatters into pieces. “Man Boba should of kept a COOL HEAD in this fight,” joked Sunset as everyone else groaned at the Pun. “Faust dammet Sunset,” muttered Twilight. “Heheh~! You’re pain feeds me and my Puns,” said Sunset with a impish grin. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Results (*Cues: Ending (Metroid) - SSB Wii U*) Wiz: Fett put up a fight to the best of his abilities, but Samus' superior technology and athletic skills trumped him in every way. “She was holding all the cards in this fight,” said Applejack with a nod at Wiz’s explanation. Boomstick: While Fett may be more durable and physically stronger, Samus has dealt with foes like that all her life. Wiz: Boba Fett really didn't have the means necessary to catch Samus, let alone perfectly counter Samus' power bomb, screwattack, and ice beam. “True since his weapons were either lasers or explosives,” Starlight commented, stroking her chin. “Makes it hard to dodge those bombs when Samus was running all over the place,” Rainbow added. Boomstick: Sure, Boba's killed plenty of Jedi and survived a run-in with Vader, but his greatest victories usually stemmed from his cunning. He's a master of playing his enemies into his hands. “Reminds me of how Sunset used to do things back when we first met,” said Twilight thinking back on the days where Sunset was just another enemy, but now she was one of her closest friends. “Ya… how i "used" to do things,” said Sunset with a nervous Smile. Wiz: But when it comes to Samus, Fett had little to work with. Samus specifically modeled her bounty hunter career around anonymity. She's even commonly mistaken as a man by the very people who want to hire her, making it extremely difficult for Boba Fett to get a read on her. Boomstick: Fett just couldn't keep his head in the game. “HA!” laughed Sunset. “I thought you hated Puns when used in poor taste,” questioned Starlight. “Dead parent jokes and dead kid jokes and rape jokes are where i draw the like,” explained Sunset. Causing everyone to agree with her standards. Wiz: The winner is Samus Aran. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Boomstick: Next time on Death Battle. The first thing they saw is a pair of legs shown before some words appear. YOU THOUGHT HE WAS UNMATCHED The camera changes to a badass man wearing a trenchcoat, cowboy hat and his cool beard. YOU THOUGHT HE HAD NO EQUAL Soon it transitioned to a Japanese man wearing a white training gi with his arms cross with a stern look on his face. YOU NEVER MET ... SEGATA “Oh this is going to rock,” said Spike with a massive Grin. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ (*RWBY-shine*) Zero Suit Samus, with a woman to her right in a Pink and black combat latex outfit, and a woman in green and black armor very much similar to Master Chief's armor color scheme started out as they had one hand on their hips, and motioned their free hand up slowly. They did it with both hands as they closed it together until the beat drops to where it does a close up of each shot of the women then cuts to two stormtroopers dancing as they moved their arms around. It cuts back to Samus and the other two woman as three stormtroopers are in the back joining in on the dance routine as they danced a bit faster as the motioned facing slightly away as they moved their legs and arms in a downward motion. “... am i on drugs again?” asked Sunset, confused as all hell right now. “You’ve done drugs?!!” Twilight yellowed, looking at her other worldly friend. “Blame Adagio,” Sunset confessed. It cuts to Boba Fett doing half of the waving dance as he spins around. In the background is Deadpool on one knee moving his arms to beat as three stormtroopers started to do the same moves from earlier. It cuts back to ZSS and the woman again as they started to dance more frantically as they shimmed in both directions after a twirl, then proceeding to do a faint as they quirked their legs around. “The choreography is outstanding. The music is superb, the dance is exotic,” Rarity mentioned, watching the dance. “The outfits are so entrancing,” Sunset muttered, looking at the dancing girls while taking a glance at Deadpool’s body. Deadpool joins ZSS as he copies her earlier movements with two troopers in the background. It cuts to the three woman again with more storm troopers in the back copying her motion as she slowed down her dance; motioning her body and arms to the lyrics to the song. Sunset paid very close attention to the solo dancer as Twilight sighed and shook her head at her friend’s antics Shortly after it shows Deadpool and Samus again as they showed off more dance moves until it cuts to Deathstroke doing his version of a breakdance, which is him doing flips while doing a dance moves on his hand with Boba Fett in the background continuing his waving dance. It then shows Samus in her armor with Deathstroke on the left, Deadpool on the right, and finally Boba Fett in the background as they were slightly crouched as the danced at a fast pace, ending with them close to a sit down position as it cuts back to ZZS and girls, this time having Samus in her armor and even more storm troopers as they did a freestyle dance in rhythm. It cuts to ZZS in a circle with regular stormtroopers as they freestyle in a fast pace with her. “Go Girls. Shake what your Mama gave you,” Pinkie cheered, dancing to the beat of the music. Her friends laughed at her while Sunset could only smile and watch the troopers dance. It shows off Deadpool getting into a break dance as Deathstroke did the same moments later; ending off with him on his forearm as he made a pose. Boba Fett does the same only he finishes the break dance by jumping in the air, momentarily folding his legs before getting his feet back onto the ground, and posing in a crouch stance. “Ok that was impressive,” said Starlight impressed. It cuts to a wide screen Television in the background as it showed off the death battle from earlier with the sword fight with Samus and Boba Fett, cutting to other shows ranging from Red Vs Blue, RWBY, and other dance routines. Each time it changed a clip; so would the dancers on the ground from ZZS, stormtroopers, the women from earlier, Deadpool doing a break dance, Boba fett and Deathstroke. Sunset’s eyes went wide when she saw the familiar color coordinated soldiers she grew to love and hate. Suddenly, it shows Godzilla with a zoom, then goes to the ground as people continued their dance, then zoomed out to Godzilla bobbing his head as Gamera was spinning upside down with disco colors coming out from the inner parts of his shell like a Disco ball thus ending the dance as it cuts to a quote. “Gamera!?” Rainbow Dash yelled/squealed in surprise/joy. “Growth is awkward, in retrospect kind of embarrassing, hardly appreciating how important they were but in the end ultimately necessary.” As the words fade away, a white symbol appears on the bottom right corner showing the same name from the beginning of the video saying "Monty Oum 1981-2015" “What’s that suppose to mean?” Spike wondered, reading the message. “I believe it means that while growth brings about change no matter how you may not want it,” Twilight explained, rubbing her chin. “Whoever this Monty was, he was a wise man,” Sunset commented, bowing her head in respect. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ “Gotta say, this was a fun,” Sunset mentioned, getting off the couch with everyone else. “And you girls watch this everyday?” “Well not everyday, but we do see it whenever we can,” Twilight explained, leading her friend towards the box. “But this is far from over. We still have one more thing to do before we start the next episode.” “Oh? And what’s that suppose to mean?” Sunset inquired, stopping in front of the box ad looking at it curiously. “Also what’s with the box?” “It came with the DVDs and after every episode we get free stuff depending on who’s on the episode. We got some gundam models and Spike even got his own grappling hook,” Pinkie cheered, bouncing in one spot. “Free stuff? Why didn't you say so. Let’s open the box and see what we got,” Sunset cheered, watching Pinkie open the box. The pink party pony stuck her head and hooves inside the box, rummaging around for something. A moment later Pinkie emerges from the box as Rarity asked, “Did you find anything?” “You betcha,” Pinkie gushed, pulling out lots of books and a few figurines. “These were in there for all of us,” Pinkie explained, giving everyone their own share. “These look mighty interesting,” Applejack muttered, looking at the Metroid graphic novel. It seemed like a decent thing to read or to give to Applebloom. “I believe Sweetie Bell might want this,” Rarity exclaimed, holding up a Samus Figurine while Fluttershy hugged a metroid plushie. “and Dashie got this!” cheered Pinkie as she presented said Pegasus with a replica of Boba Fett’s very own Mandalorian armor… in pony form of course. “Aww Yeah. Now that’s what I’m talking about,” Rainbow cheered, putting on the armor piece by piece. A moment later, the group saw a pony version of Boba Fett standing there and yelling, “This is awesome.” Pinkie was about to cheer, but noticed a wrapped package in the box. “There’s still one more thing,” Pinkie announced, holding up the package and looking at the name on it. “It’s your’s Sunset,” Pinkie cheered, giving the package to the confused unicorn. “Really? What is it,” Sunset wondered, using her magic to open the package as two things fell out. Lifting the two things up with telekinesis, Sunset saw that the things were actually two zero suits like Samus’s with one being dark purple and the other being a light blue in color. Sunset took a closer look and saw that the suits were in her’s and Twilight’s sizes. “I know what I’m doing when I get home,” Sunset muttered, stuffing the suits in a bag. “Anyways, it’s getting late and I better get back home,” Sunset mentioned, walking towards the mirror as the others went their own ways home. “Don’t worry, Sunset. You can stay with us for the night,” Twilight suggested, walking behind her friend. “I’ll be fine,” Sunset insisted, waving her hoof. “Nonsense. We can have Spike set up a room for you,” Twilight “Yeah. Not like we don’t have the room here,” Spike pointed out. Jumping on Twilight’s back with his grappling hook. “I guess I can stay awhile,” Sunset relented, turning away from the mirror. She figured it wouldn’t do much harm to have a vacation. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ CHAPTER END! Next time…. Well we’re going on break so we’re going to take a rain check on that, but hey~ RvB sometime soon i Guess… so y~a see ya guys sometime in the future. Until next time thanks goes out to Alpha and Trepp as co-authors and to Rising Thunder for writing out the dance scene! prologueWithin the vast emptiness of space two beings of great power and infinite wisdom gathered to talk about subjects of such great importance and complexity that we mere mortals could never hope to comprehend. “This is the stupidest idea ever…of all time.” drawled one of the “grand” beings. A creature that took the appearance of a human shaped mass of blue energy wearing a nice black business suit and giving off an air of boredom. This entity was known as Trepp, the being of tamed mischief, he overlooked the more controlled forms of chaos and makes sure nothing gets too out of hand. “I’m telling you Trepp this will be the best way to relieve our boredom yet.” proclaimed a being of fire that was restrained by a straight jacket and chains. This creature was named “DEADMAN!™.” he ruled over insane mischief and his job consisted of watching over the more random form of chaos. His form of chaos brought the most danger but also the most change in whatever world he visited. …….. Yeeeaaah. Anyways as i was saying, these great beings of mischief and chaos where known throughout the multiverse as the “bumbling duo”. A pair of chaos gods who go around messing with worlds governed by other gods of chaos. They were Infamous for going world to world leaving something that didn’t belong and having it change the world for better or worst. “Ya It’s like the the narrator said! This is our thing!” proclaimed the insane ball of fire. Completely shattering the fourth wall with it’s comment. “Sigh…. I wish you would stop breaking the fourth wall like that.” muttered the bored being of chaos (HA IRONY!). “You know it angers the beings of order when you ignore the boundaries set by the other gods.” he drawled. “Oh please! You worry too much.” replied the living inferno, completely brushing his fellow ruler of mischief’s concern aside. Showing that he was dead set on going through with whatever plan he had cooked up. “Besides if they haven't done anything to use before why would they now?” he questioned “Ok 1, I hope you realised that you just jinxed us big time with that little comment of yours.” trepp said while also sending a weak glare at his insane friend. “and 2 what makes this idea any more interesting than the previous ones?” he questioned. Deadman seem to brighten up both figuratively and quet literally, when trepp asked that one simple question. “You see my blue friend, the reason why this will be different is because the world we will be watching is home to our good friend Harmony!” cheered deadman completely missing trepp in the background banging his head on a random asteroid in frustration. After spending a good few seconds pounding the poor asteroid into rubble with his own head, trepp was able to calm down enough to turn to his fellow chaos god with the best calm look he could muster. Taking a deep breath trepp slowly calmed his nerves knowing he would need every ounce of patience he had for what was to come. “So you're telling me that you're planning on messing with the world of one of the oldest gods of order?” he questioned.” the same goddess that put you in those very chains in the first place?” some irritation was slowly building up. “HAHA! I know right!? Best payback prank ev-!” laughed the insane deity, but his enjoyment was cut short as he realised the his stoic friend was giving him the most chilling glare he’d ever seen. “AND YOU THINK IT’S GOOD IDEA TO SEND SOMETHING TO HER WORLD THAT COULD DRIVE IT TO OBLIVION!?” screamed the usually stoic god as he glared daggers at his irresponsible friend. “Do you have any idea what she would do to us if any of her subjects are harmed because of your impulses attitude!?” ranted trepp. “C-calm down trepp! You're just overreacting, nothing is going to go wrong!” stammered out Deadman. Realising a nervous chuckle as he notice his blue companion’s glare didn't leave his face. “Everything will turn out just fine! Right narrator?” he begged as he gave the disembodied voice a pleading look. Don’t get me involved in this…. “shit!” hissed the living inferno as he took a quick glance at his upset friend, breaking out in a cold sweat when he notice his usually stoic friend was still sending him a scathing glare. “Hehehehe…would it make you feel better if I said sorry” he laughed nervously. Trepp could only keep his glare up for a few seconds longer before he released a tired sigh and settled with giving his squirming friend an annoyed look. “Whatever… I’m just glad I nipped this in the bud before anything could happen.” groand the exhausted deity, but he was quick to notice that the nervous look was still planted on Deadman’s face. “What happened?” he questioned feeling that he would not like the answer. “Well…...I might of, possibly, more than likely…SentThePackagedAllready!!” blurted out the fiery being. Hoping his friend didn’t catch what he said, but unfortunately he did if the sporadic head twitching and the clenching of his hands were any indication.”hehehe~ oops?” he said sheepishly. “YOU DID WHAT!? WHERE DID YOU SEND IT!!” Trepp screamed as he quickly rushed towards his friend, planning to strangle him for this colossal mess up that could end badly for the both of them. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Meanwhile in Equestria, location Castle of Friendship.~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ “I’m telling you twilight, I really think you shouldn't be messing with something that somehow got into the castle” spoke a nervous purple and green baby dragon. His green eyes looking towards said object as his friend/mother figure was poking and prodding the strange objects. “Spike I told you all ready it’s just a tv, just like the one’s in the human world.” explained a lavender pony with large purple eyes and a straight prussian blue mane and tail with violet and rose streaks and to top off the look, she was sporting a horn and a set of wing, officially making her an alicorn one of the rarest species in the whole world. “I know what it is Twilight. I’m just not sure you should be messing with something that shouldn't even be in our world.” said the nervous drake as he kept a safe distance from the 70 inch plasma widescreen tv (WITH NETFLIX!) which was hanging on the wall of the ballroom. “And that's what I’m trying to figure out,” muttered twilight as she tried every type of scanning spell to make sure it wasn’t a trap, but every scan ended with it coming out clean.”but from what every spell is telling me is that it’s safe.” she exclaimed. “Well maybe you could take a look at this box now.” spike said as he pointed towards the mentioned box which was set in the corner of the room. “I was getting to that.” the young alicorn said as she makes her way to the lone box, keeping her guard up, ”hm? there's a note taped on it?” she questioned, using her magic to pull the note from the box. Dear twilight sparkle. You are no doubt wondering about the two items that I have left within your home. Firstly I would like to put any fears you might have about the objects being some sort of trap. I sent these items to you so you could glimpse into worlds. Held within this box a set of DVDs and a DVD player to go with the TV that was also provided for you. The DVDs contain all of the episodes of a show from another world that dedicated itself on answering the most important question ever asked… who would win in a fight! This show pits some of the greatest warriors against each other to see who would come out on top! but If this doesn't catch your interest and you think this would be a waste of your time, then you are free to put everything up where you found it and both the tv and the box and it’s contents will be gone from your castle within an hour, but if you are interested in the concept of seeing warriors from other worlds battling it out and LEARNING about other worlds and their coulters. Then please take a seat and enjoy the show! From: A friend. Both residents of the castle stared at the letter before giving each other a confused look. After a few more seconds of silence it was spike who spoke up. “So… what should we do?” questioned the young dragon as he waited for his parental figure to came up with an answer like she usually does when faced with the abnormal situations that always seem to find their way to their doorstep. Said lavender pony just stood there in deep thought until she looked towards the box and used her magic to remove it’s contents and gently lay them on the floor in front of the tv. “Spike could you do me a favor and please get the girls while I set everything up?” Asked Twilight as she started connecting the wires in the correct areas just like the human counterpart of her friend rainbowdash showed furring her second time in the human world. “So the others will be watching the show as well?” Spike asked, wondering if it was a good idea to involve more ponies in this strange situation. “ well if it’s not a trap like the letter says then i don’t see no reason to not let them in on a rare chance to see something from a whole new world.” replied the princess of friendship with a simple shrug. “Besides I’d rather have our friends here with us incase it is a trap.” she explained further. The young drake thought twilight’s words over a few more seconds before giving her a bright smile and running off to complete the task that he was given, leaving an amused Twilight who couldn't help but smile at her young charges enthusiasm. Shaking her head in amusement she decided to get back to her own task stopping only after she took a quick glance at the title of the DVDS. “DEATH BATTLE?” Samus Aran VS. Boba Fett.(edited)“Are you sure about this about this Twi?” questioned a southern voice belonging to a young mare with an amber coat, green eyes and a blond mane and tail, wearing a brown stetson hat, and her cutie mark was of three red apples. This young mare is known by many as, Applejack or A.J. To her friend's, and just like her friend Twilight who represented the Element of Magic, she represents the Element of Honesty. “I have to agree with Applejack on this one darling, I don’t even think a show called, ‘Death Battle’, would even be all that entertaining.” commented a white unicorn, with blue eyes, a purple mane and tail, and a cutie mark that is an image of three diamonds. This young mare was called, Rarity, Ponyville's very own fashion-designer and the one who represents the Element of Generosity. “Are you two serious? This sounds awesome!” argued a brash voice belonging to a young blue coat pegasus, with magenta eyes, along with a rainbow colored mane and tail, and was also sporting a rainbow-colored lightning bolt as her cutie mark. This tomboyish mare is known as, Rainbow Dash, self proclaimed fastest flyer all of equestria, and the one who represents the Element of Loyalty. “Dashie’s right girls! This is going to be super dooper Fun! Fun! Fun!” cheered a hyperactive pink pony, with electric blue eyes, and a cerise mane and tail. Her cutie mark consists of one yellow balloon along with two blue ones. This ball of energy is, Pinkie Pie, she’s Ponyville's no.1 Party Planner Extraordinaire, and represents the Element of Laughter. “A’h know you two would get excited over somethin’ like this, but aren't ya just a little bit too eager to watch something about battles to the death?” the southern mare questioned with a raised brow. “Oh please, A.J. it’s just a show! It’s not like anypony is really getting hurt.” countered the the blue mare, ”Am I right, Fluttershy?” she questioned a yellow coated pegasus, with cerulean eyes, pink mane and tail, and a cutie mark of three butterflies which represented her gentle nature. Said the mare who hid behind her long mane as she nervously nodded her head. This young mare was named, Fluttershy. A kind and gentle pony who took care of any animal no matter how big or small it was. Because of her gentle soul, she is the one who represents the Element of Kindness. “Now girls, I had Spike to bring you here so we could have a good time seeing something that's never been seen in our world before.” Twilight cutted in before her two strong headed friends’ argument could get out of hand. “Fine/Sure thing Twi.” the two muttered out as they and the others sat in some chairs that Twilight had placed while she was setting everything up. “Ok everypony! Are you all ready to see a show from out of this world!?” cheered the princess to her fellow ponies and one young dragon. “YEAAAH!” cheered the rest of the group as Twilight hit play on the remote that came with the T.V. It was silent for a second before some music started to blast from the speakers and the show logo appeared on screen and two voices, probably the hosts of the show, started speaking. (*Cues: Invader - Jim Johnston*) Wiz: The bounty hunter. Galactic pirates of living beings. Boomstick: They blow shit up for cash. “Whoo!” Rainbow dash cheered. “blowing stuff up and getting paid too!? Sign me up!” But while she was fantasizing about being an awesome bounty hunter, she was completely missing the amused smiles that her friends are sending her. Wiz: A prime example is Boba Fett, the most feared bounty hunter in the galaxy. Boomstick: But don't forget Samus Aran. She's so badass, whole planets explode when she's done with them. BOOM! Wiz: I'm Wizard. Boomstick: And I'm Boomstick. Wiz: And it's our job to analyze the weapons, armor, and skills of these two beastly killers and answer the most important question of all: Which of these two warriors would win... a Death Battle? This was already starting to catch most of the group's attention, but for ponies like Applejack and Rarity, they would have to wait and see if this show would be worth the time. Boba Fett (*Cues: Star Wars Episode IV - The Death Star/The Stormtroopers*) Wiz: Boba Fett is well known for his cunning, ruthlessness, and brute force. But his killer instinct relies on his diverse arsenal of death. The ponies and one dragon had a chill going down in their backs once a picture of the first fighter shows up on screen accompanied by some really chilling music. “S-scary…” squeaked out a frighten Fluttershy as she tried hiding behind her mane, but a comforting hoof was placed on her shoulder by, Rainbow Dash, who gave her a confident smile which helped boost Fluttershy’s confidence to keep watching. Mandalorian Body Armor Nearly Indestructible (They wondered what it could be made of or if it could stop a blast of magic someone like Tirek,) Micro Energy Field (That caught Twilight's attention.) Penetrating Radar Protection from Fire, Poison, Acid, Cold (Twilight was really tempted to find this amazing metal just so she could research it.) Retractable Drinking Straw (This sets Pinkie on a giggling fit.) Boomstick: Plus, he wears the most badass space suit ever. “I must say, while I don’t quite agree with his occupation, I have to admit he looks quite dashing in that armor.” complemented Rarity as she fantasized about being rescued by a brave stallion and being carried towards the sunset. But unannounced to her, Spike was envisioning the same thing but with him in the armor and getting a kiss from Rarity. Wiz: That's no ordinary spacesuit, Boomstick; that's Fett's Mandalorian Armor, forged of nearly indestructible Duraplast, containing a micro-energy field for dispersing impacts. Boomstick: This guy can have a freaking bomb blow up in his face and still walk away. “Not even Princess Celestia can handle an explosion that close to her face without it causing some major damage.” muttered out Twilight as she envisioned a being that could take more damage then one of the strongest ponies in the world. Wrist Gauntlets Flame Projector Fiber Cord Whip Wrist Laser Concussion Missiles Stun Missiles Wiz: His gauntlets house a flamethrower with a reach of 5 meters, a fiber cord whip, and numerous concussion and stun missiles. His weapon of choice is his EE-3 Carbine Rifle, an extremely accurate and powerful weapon which Fett often cradles like a child. EE-3 Carbine Blaster Fires in Short Burst Scope-Outfitted Shoulder Sling Rock-a-Bye Rifle... (That confuses everyone, even Pinkie Pie.) Boomstick: Yeah... I do that with my guns, too... Wiz: That's not weird at all, Boomstick. Fill us in on Fett's heavy weaponry. “I don’t think our host are all up there if you know what I mean?” snarked the young fire breather as he twirled a clawed finger next to his head, electing a few giggles from his friends. Boomstick: Well, everybody and their grandmother knows that Fett can zoom around on his badass jetpack, but that jetpack also has a single anti-vehicle homing rocket, and believe me, you don't want to see this thing heading your way. "AWWWW YEAH! Flying for the win!" cheered Rainbow Dash. Mitrinomon Z-6 Jetpack Hands-Free Up to 1 Minute in Flight (that was really disappointing to rainbow dash.) Max Speed: 145 kph Magnetic Grappling Hook Anti-Vehicle Homing Rocket While the speed and range of it’s flight was disappointing especially to a certain blue mare. Everyone could agree, it still had it’s uses and could even help ponies who couldn't fly or do things that they would need a pegasus's help to do. “Though it would be totally awesome to have something on my back to shoot at any nasty monster that attacked Ponyville!” the fastest flyer in Ponyville said while the others agreed it would be helpful dealing with monsters that seem to always show up when they let their guard down. Wiz: That's right, Boomstick. In short, Fett is a human Swiss Army Knife. He's killed hundreds of criminals, politicians, and Jedi. He's even held his own against Darth Vader... twice. Boomstick: Holy shit, that is hardcore! The group had to admit, those kind of feats were impressive especially when an image of who, Darth Vader was. This was somepony that could even out scare ponies like, Nightmare Moon and even Sombra. “And this Fett guy fought this monster TWICE!?” exclaimed Applejack, wondering why somepony would be willing to fight something that could make Nightmare Moon look like a tamed kitten in comparison. Wiz: He became leader of the Mandalorian Mercenaries after the Galactic Civil War, and battled Mace Windu to a draw when he was 12 years old. “WHEN HE WAS 12!?” yelled the girls surprised that someone so young could keep up with a more experienced fighter. “So cool!” cheered Spike with stars in his eye’s, wondering if he could pull off something like that while he was still young. Boomstick: Sam Jackson's got nothing on him. Wiz: But, with all his awesomeness, every so often Fett will totally blow it. He's fallen into the Sarlacc three times. Three! And the Sarlacc's not exactly running around, looking for snacks. Boomstick: Three times? How do you even do that once? It's a giant hole in the ground with teeth, and he's got a jetpack! “Yeah he can fly! How could he fall in that stupid hole in the first place!?” ranted Dash miffed that someone she thought was cool could do something so lame. “I want to know how he fell in there two more times?” questioned Fluttershy, wondering why he didn't learn his lesson the first time. Wiz: Still, even with his ridiculous flaws, Boba Fett is a whole new meaning of deadly. Darth Vader: No disintegration. Boba Fett: As you wish. After the analysis for Boba Fett was over, the girls and dragon talked about the fearsome bounty hunter and agreed that even with his faults, he was still a fearsome foe and wondered how this, Samus Aran, would stack up. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Samus Aran (*Cues: Lower Norfair - Super Metroid*) Wiz: Samus Aran was infused with bird-like Chozo DNA at a young age, increasing her strength, speed, and athletic ability far beyond those of a normal human being. Boomstick: How do they do that?! I want me some bird DNA! “I don’t think it works that way.” lectured Twilight. “Well, they are from space. Maybe they have birds that can take down giant aliens?” reasoned Spike which caused the girls to give it a thought and also had Fluttershy wondering if those kind of birds would be her friends. Wiz: She wears the Power Suit, typically in Varia form, shielding her entire body without restricting any movement or flexibility. "it's amazing that something that looks so heavy could allow her to moves with such grace and speed." admired rarity. Power Suit Shields Entire Body Environmental Protection Easy to Upgrade No restriction of Movement or Flexibility (That impressed them that such a bulky suit could allow that much movement.) Boomstick: Too bad it makes her look like a dude… That caused a few like Rainbow Dash, Pinkie Pie and Spike to snicker at Boomsticks disappointed tone. While the others just rolled their eyes at the saddened man. Wiz: Her primary weapon, the Arm Cannon, has acquired numerous awesome upgrades over the years. Though, the basic Power Beam is a pea shooter with a pathetic range. "Well that's disappointing," muttered an unimpressed Twilight. Boomstick: But when it's fully charged, it'll blow your face off. BAM! Shoop Da Whoop! “Heheheheh! Boomy is so silly.” giggled Pinkie, finding the vocal of the two crazy narrators more entertaining. Wiz: The Arm Cannon can also use an Ice Beam, a Grapple Beam, and a plethora of Seeking and Super Missiles. Samus controls the skies with a powerful and speedy Screw Attack, and if there's trouble on the battlefield, she can curl up into Morph Ball mode and slip away unnoticed. “How does she fly like that!?” yelled both Rainbow Dash and Twilight., both dumbfounded on how someone could fly in such a ridiculous way. Arm Cannon Easy to Upgrade Power Beam Charge Beam Ice Beam Grapple Beam Missiles Mitrinomon Z-6 Jetpack (Screw Attack) Powerful electric charge Temporary invincibility Extremely Fast Namesake of an Awesome Website! Morph Ball Alt-Form 1 Meter Diameter Can Release Bombs Jumping Ability Also Called "Maru Mari" Can Access Small or Hard to Reach Places Boomstick: What the f...?! How does she do that? Wiz; Bird DNA, Boomstick. Bird DNA. The small group had to marvel at the large array of weapons in abilities that were listed on screen, showing just how skilled and versatile Samus really was. Boomstick: Samus also has a freakin huge supply of Power Bombs, which will destroy anything on the screen in seconds. Nothing survives! “Wowzers! Those are some big fireworks!” Yelled Pinkie Pie. wondering if those power bombs could be used to make the greatest surprise party ever! A cold chill ran down everyone else's back and they all had the sudden urge to keep Pinkie Pie away from any explosives. Power Bombs Huge Blast Radius Deals Massive Damage Crystal Flash Healing Ability Deployed Only in Morph Ball Mode Wiz: She is known to be the bounty hunter capable of taking on impossible missions, fighting massive beasts, and even wiping out an entire species. However, she often makes mistakes. Somehow, she always seems to lose all her power ups and upgrades at the beginning of every mission. Boomstick: Man, someone get this chick a purse. “She should stop by my place sometime. I’m sure I could find her the right purse to go with her suit of armor.” bragged Rarity, causing her friends to laugh and agreeing that, ‘If anyone could do it, it would be Rarity’. Samus: Time to go. Wiz: Alright, the combatants are set. Let's end this debate once and for all. Boomstick: But first, we gotta pay off my double barreled, bazooka shotgun, thanks to netflix. intermission<<<<<<<<<< As the trailer played out everyone was discussing about the fighters, they all agreed that both bounty hunters where skilled in their own ways. On team Boba Fett was Rainbow dash, Pinkie Pie, Rarity, and Spike. Boba was so cool and they thought with his experience and track record would get him the win. And on team Samus was Twilight, AppleJack, and Fluttershy. To them not only was she physically stronger, but also had a greater arsenal to work with. After everyone got settled down to continued watching, Twilight quickly hit play to continue the show. Boomstick: Well it’s time for a death battle!!! Death Battle (*Cues: Metroid: Zero Mission - Title Theme Remix*) Samus is shown flying through space in her spaceship. However, Boba Fett's ship, the Slave I, shoots at her ship, throwing out of orbit which is landing on Earth, where it crash lands somewhere in the middle of a futuristic city. Samus gets out of her ship and Fett hovers down to the where Samus landed. FIGHT! (*Cues: Star Wars Episode V - Attacking a Star Destroyer*) Samus shoots her Power Beams, that fade out almost instantly, not even reaching her opponent. (Rainbow couldn't help but laugh at this.) Fett counters with a few shots from his blaster, but Samus jumps in the air, firing a missile at Fett, which hits. When she lands, Fett hits her with his flamethrower. When Samus jumps back and shoots another missile, Fett flies up using his jet pack. However, Samus goes after him using her Screw Attack and eventually hits him, which forces him to the ground. “Git ’im Samus! Show that no good varmint what for!” cheered Applejack, seeing the the female bounty hunter take down the mandalorian warrior. “Grrrr come on Fett! You can do this!” yelled a frustrated Rainbow Dash while her fellow teammates cheered on their favorite hunter. (*Cues: Star Wars Episode IV - Imperial Attack*) When Samus lands, Fett shoots missiles at her. He then fires his anti-vehicle homing missile, which Samus escapes by going into Morph Ball mode and escaping through a doorway. (*Cues: Unknown Theme*) Fett cautiously creeps toward the doorway as Samus sneaks behind him in Morph Ball mode and plants a Power Bomb near his feet. (*Cues: Unknown Theme*) “Uh-oh…” muttered team Boba Fett as they realised what was coming next. The bomb explodes and it takes off a large chunk of Fett's health. His suit having withstood the blast, Fett sees Samus and fires a missile at her. Samus dodges by stepping to the side and then freezes Fett using her Ice Beam. She then moves toward the frozen bounty hunter and begins charging her arm cannon. With the charge at its apex and Boba Fett's body slightly moving as he tries to break free of the ice, Samus positions her arm cannon toward his head. Samus: You're mine. With the charge at its maximum before Boba Fett could escape, Samus fires her Charge Beam point-blank, knocking his head clean from his body. K.O.! His head flies back downward, clanking on the ground leaving everyone wide eyed at the gruesome display. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ “NOOOOOO!!” wailed a heartbroken Rainbow Dash as the rest of team Boba Fett looked down in sadness as their favorite Fighter was put down. Results (*Cues: Super Metroid - Main Theme (Orchestrated)* ) Boomstick: Holy shit! Did you see that, Wiz? That was insane! Wiz: Fett battled like a champ, but in the end, Samus' superior technology and athletic skill trumped him... hard. While her basic Power Beam failed miserably, Samus put her Chozo DNA to work by jumping and dodging around Fett's offenses. Boba Fett, who relies more on cunning and brute force, simply didn't have the means necessary to catch Samus. “You can only get so far with just brute force alone.” explained Twilight. The rest agreeing with her logic even if a few wanted Fett to win. Boomstick: He was shooting all over the place, but that space chick was just too quick for him. He even tried to use his homing rocket, but anybody who's blown up a lot of shit knows anti-vehicle rockets don't work too well with people. Wiz: Exactly. Samus is about four times smaller than the average vehicle, so there's only about a one in four chance for a direct hit from Fett's rocket. Not to mention she kept moving, preventing Fett from getting a solid lock on her. Everyone could agree that shooting someone with a weapon that was made to take out things much larger and slower than someone who was faster and more acrobatic was not a smart choice, especially when that person could roll up into a ball even smaller then them and sneak around in hard to reach places. Boomstick: After that screw up, Samus managed to sneak around Fett and left a little surprise at his feet. Wiz: Fett's micro-energy field managed to minimize the damage he took from the power bomb, but by that point, it was all over. Samus froze Fett with her Ice Beam and finished him off with a Charge Beam to the face. Boomstick: She sure stopped him cold. That caused everyone to groan at Boomsticks lame pun except a giggling Pinkie Pie who was rolling on the ground laughing at what she considered a, super duper awesome joke. Wiz: That's right Boomstick. The Winner is Samus Aran. End Boomstick: Next time on DEATH BATTLE! There was a flurry of punches covered in purple flames and then an odd burning symbol appeared on screen, followed by a bone chilling voice. ???: your souls is mine! END. “Awwww man! I was so sure someone as cool as Fett would win!” groaned out a disheartened Rainbow dash as Fluttershy laid her hoof down on her friend's shoulder trying to cheer her up. “I know you're bummed out Dashie, but at least he gave it his all and it was still a fun fight.” said a grinning Pinkie pie which caused the rainbow speedster to give a small smile and nod to the pink party pony. “Well, I just hope everyone had a fun time watching this show together.” chirped a happy Twilight, and glad she was able to not only see creatures from another world, but their vast array of technology as well. “A’h have to admit Twi, that wasn’t half bad! Heck, I could watch another episode right now.” proclaimed Applejack, glad that she gave this show a chance and Rarity seemed to agree with her southern friend. “While I’m sad Mr. Fett died, it’s like Rainbow Dash said, ‘it’s just a show’, and I think I could watch some more too.” said Fluttershy with a confident look but quickly switched to a more bashful expression. “W-well, I mean... as long as everyone watches with me… if you don’t mind that is.” stuttered the blushing pegasus. “Well, I’m glad everyone enjoyed the show and we can watch another episode in a little bit. But first, I think we should stretch our legs for a bit and maybe get something to eat for the next battle, I also want to send a letter to the princess about this show, and how it’s from another world.” Twilight suggested as she and Spike made there way to the library to grab a quill and ink. The rest of the group agreed and made their way to the kitchen to make themselves something to eat. ####( Ending scene) “Well that sure was a fun watch if A’h do say so myself” praised AppleJack as she and the rest of the group made their way to the kitchen to grab a few snacks for the next episode while Twilight and Spike wrote a letter to Princess Celestia. “Totally agree with you there A.J! But just you wait, the next person I choose will definitely win!” bragged the rainbow maned mare as she puffed out her chest in pride, knowing the next person she rooted for would definitely win. "And I thought it was super funny how Sammy was able to fly like that!" giggled Pinkie Pie, as she bounced along with her friends, "I wonder if I could fly like that too if I tried hard enough?" she questioned while stopping to ponder her own question. "Well, I don't know about that darling, but I must say that I'm feeling quite peckish, wouldn't mind a small snack." said Rarity, to which everyone agreed with and the group started to pick up the pace to get to the kitchen faster. None of them noticing Pinkie Pie wasn't following them. "I hope twilight has something good to eat, right Pinkie Pie?" asked Rainbow Dash, as she made her way to the kitchen with the rest of the group. But, she stop and raised a brow, as soon as she realised that her pink friend didn't reply to her question. "Pinkie Pie?" she questioned as she turned around to see what was wrong, but was soon stunned silent as she along with the rest of her friend's saw the most bizarre sight they've seen yet. "What in tarnation!?" muttered the southern mare, as she and the rest of the group saw Pinkie Pie roll up into a pink ball with only her tail sticking out, and much to the amazement to her friends began to FLY! "Wheeee!!! I did it guys!" cheered the hyper pink pony as she was perfectly imitating Samus's Screw Attack and started making her way down towards the kitchen. “Hurry up girls! I'll meet you there!” she proclaimed, while continuing her way down the hall, luckily not bumping, or knocking anything over. The the rest of the group could only stare, dumbfounded as their party planing friend continued defying all laws of physics, and kept making her way to the kitchen. "...... Let's not tell Twilight about this." said Fluttershy wide-eyed, not wanting her lavender friend to mentally break down like she did last time she tried to figure out how Pinkie Pie is capable of her strange feats. The rest of her friends nodding in agreement as they continued their trek down to the kitchen, applying the most important life lesson they ever learned. If it’s Pinkie Pie, don't question it. Chapter END. Starscream VS Rainbow Dash.The four stood there as three of their friends just walked out the door after they saw who was on the next episode. “Well should we watch the next episode?” Spike asked, scratching his head in confusion. “Of course we’re gonna watch it. We can’t just not watch something as awesome as this,” Rainbow said, doing a little dance. She really wanted to see how she fares in the fight. “It’s a shame that it’s just gonna be us,” Twilight said, walking over to the couch. Taking a seat, Twilight used her magic to levitate the remote towards her as a loud knocking came from her door. She raised an eyebrow while focusing her magic to her door causing it to open. Outside the door where two figures that just stood there, looking inside. The first one was a turquoise colored pegasus mare with a slicked back golden mane. The other one was the stranger of the two as it was a brown griffon with white and purple tipped feathers. They were Lightning Dust and Gilda respectively, Rainbow Dash’s friends. “Uh, is Rainbow Dash here? We were at her house, but she wasn’t there,” Lightning said, looking around the room a bit. She had her front hooves crossed and was fidgeting a bit. “Hey, Gilda, Lightning. What’s up?” Rainbow asked, flying over towards them. “Not much. Kinda bored and figured we could just bother you for a bit,” Gilda said while smirking slightly. She held her clenched claw up as Rainbow bumped it with her hoof. “I hear you. And you Lightning?” Rainbow asked, wondering why her ex-partner was here. “The thing is, I wanted to know if we could start over. I know we didn’t leave on the best of terms but-” Lightning tried to say but was stopped as Rainbow held up a hoof. “It’s water under the bridge Lightning. So how about you two come inside. We were just about to do something, want to watch?” Rainbow , flying back towards the couch. “Watch?” the two asked at the same time. They at each other in confusion but shrugged and followed Rainbow inside. Once inside the room, they sat down on the couch and saw the flat screen TV in front of them. “What’s that?” Lightning asked, staring at the strange object. “Don’t worry about it. We use it to watch the show,” Rainbow said, grabbing a few cupcakes for herself. “Show?” Gilda asked confused. “Just watch. Turn it on Twilight,” Rainbow said as her friend rolled her eyes and pressed play on the remote. Interlude (*Cues: Invader - Jim Johnston*) Unlike the others who get surprised at the intro music, Gilda and Lightning Dust were nodding their heads to the intense beat. Wiz: Television has been used to market toys to boys and girls for generations, ranging from G.I. Joe and Barbie to Transformers and My Little Pony. “So that’s what our counterparts are in that world, toys and cartoons.” Twilight said Boomstick: Are we really doing this? “This guy doesn't really seem to be getting into it,” Lightning Dust commented. “Meh his problem not our’s,” said Gilda with a shrug. Wiz/Rainbow Dash: Yes. Yes we are. Boomstick: Alright, well, Starscream from the first generation Decepticons... “A guy with that kind of name must be an awesome warrior,” Lightning dust said. Twilight and Gilda nodding their heads in agreement. “Well of course I would be fighting someone who also would just as awesome!” bragged Rainbow Dash. not noticing Pinkie Pie snickering in the background. “Ya if this was Armada Starscream, then i would totally agree,” Pinkie Pie said to herself before giving the writer and the readers a wink. “Right Mr Author?” she asked. Damn straight. Wiz: ...And Rainbow Dash of the G4 Pegasus Ponies. “AKA the winner of this fight,” said speedster said as her friends gave her amused looks. Boomstick: He's Wiz and I'm Boomstick. Wiz: And it's our job to analyze their weapons, armor, and skills to find out who would win a Death Battle. Starscream (*Cues: Attack On the Shuttle - Lightning Their Darkest Hour*) Wiz: Starscream is the air commander of the Decepticon Battle fleet. He constantly seeks power, and often attempts to usurp Megatron's leadership of the Decepticons, with little success. Background Height: Approx. 20' Decepticon seeker Air commander Graduate of the Cybertron War Academy Nicknamed 'Silver Snake' “So a backstabber,” commented Twilight before she sent a Look towards Rainbow Dash. “Your other self will have to stay on guard when fighting him.” Said mare nodded as she was paying close attention on the screen. Boomstick: He has two forms- giant robot and jet. “Aren't jets those flying metal things that the human world Rainbow Dash told us about?” asked Spike, getting a nod from Twilight. “Yes and while she didn’t tell us much, she did say they fly extremely fast and are arm to the teeth.” said the Princess of Magic. Getting a slightly nervous look from Rainbow Dash. Wiz: His robot form is primarily meant for ground travel. Though it can fly short distances. Robot-Mode Humanoid Can fly Cluster bombs Missiles Laser guns Null Ray “So he’ll be slower in that form.” analysed Twilight. “I think that’s when you should go on the offences,” suggested Gilda. “Ya your other self can win if she takes him out before he turns into his jet mode,” added Lightning Dust. earning a grateful smile from the mare, happy that at least some of her friends still had hope that she could when. Boomstick: This form's weaponry consists of cluster bomb, missiles, machine guns, and his trademark Null Ray, a laser that shuts down anything that uses electricity. “(gulp) so twi… how bad are those weapons?” questioned Rainbow Dash. “Bad.” the alicorn simply said as she remembered reading some books the sunset lent on human weaponry and not being able to sleep for a week after hearing about the atom bomb, and what it can do. Wiz: He can transform into an F-15 Eagle; a twin engined, all weather fighter jet with top speeds reaching mach 2.8, nearly three times the speed of sound. “That is fast but I’m faster and this guy is nowhere Sonic’s speed.” said Rainbow Dash. “Who’s Sonic?” asked Gilda, Lightning Dust wondering as well. “Oh it’s some guy Rainbow Dash li-” Spike was about to say before Rainbow Dash covered his mouth with her hoof. “It’s no one! Just forget you heard anything!” Panicked the Rainbow maned Mare, giving her two friends a nervous smile. “O...kay?” said a confused Lightning dust. Boomstick: In jet form, he can fire three different types of homing missiles, from short-ranged Sidewinders to long ranged Slammers. And if those don't do the trick, he's equipped with a M61A1 Vulcan Gatling Gun, that fires twenty millimeter ammo at six-thousand rounds per minute. Fun fact: it also works great for hunting! “A pretty big assortment of weapons. But with your speed and size he shouldn't be able to hit you,” stated Twilight in full confidence of her friends skill. “Ya good thing you’ve always been a shrimp huh?” teased Gilda as she ruffled Dash’s mane, earning her a cute pout from said mare. “Teehee!” giggled Pinkie Pie happy to see her friend in a better mood. alternate mode F-15 Eagle Fighter Jet Top Speed: 2,100 MPH RIM homing missiles 7F/M Sparrows 120 AMRAAM Slammers 9L/M Sidewinders M61A1 Vulcan Gatling Gun Wiz: Starscream is a coward, and uses cheap tactics, often shooting his opponents in the back. However, his deadliest weapon is arguably his silver tongue. While he is not the strongest Decepticon, he is a cleaver and deceiving speaker, who can worm his way into favorable positions. Despite this he is a terrible strategist. Most of his plans instantly go wrong. Attributes A clever speaker Transparent Strategist Arrogant & Stubborn Cowardly Uses cheap tactics “So he’s only good at talking out his flank?” deadpanned Lightning Dust. “Doubt he can even use half the weapons he has,” snarked Gilda. “Just be happy this isn’t Armada Starscream, that guy was a great fighter and could turn his wings into laser swords!” said Pinkie Pie mutch to the confusion of everyone else. Boomstick: Like when he took over the Decepticons because Megatron had a sore throat: Everyone face hoofed at this. Megatron: *incomprehensible speech* Autobots! “Awww~ poor Megy sounds so sick! I bet a bowl of soup could help,” said Pinkie Pie, pulling out a bowl of steaming soup out of nowhere. Starscream: Too bad! He's blown his vocal components. I guess that makes me the new leader! “Did he really try to a move like that.” Twilight said in a flat tone. “Reminds me of some of those Nobles that thought they could replace Celestia.” deadpanned Spike. Boomstick/Pinkie Pie: It was short lived. Wiz: And yet his persistence paid off, and he was eventually crowned leader of the Decepticon Faction. “What!” yelled most of the group in disbelief. “Wait for it.” said a bored Pinkie Pie. Boomstick: Again, short lived. “There we go!” grinned Pinkie Pie. Wiz: Starscream was king for a whopping twenty seconds, a personal record. However, after his death, Starscream discovered his spark, or life-force, was, somehow, indestructible. “So in other words… he lucked out?” asked Lightning Dust “Seems that way,” answered Twilight. Boomstick: And a good thing too, because since then, he's been dying nearly every episode. “Ouch,” mumbled Spike. Starting to feel bad for the guy. Spark Indestructible Can move on its own Floats Can possess & control other machines Wiz: His ghostly spark can possess machinery. He has taken over several other Transformers, robots, and even a cybernetic schoolgirl while she was using the bathroom. Boomstick/everyone: What?! Wiz: Unfortunately, his poor knowledge of human society led him to forget to pull up the girl's underwear, making him the laughing stock of the school. The group was split between laughing and feeling bad for the school girl. Boomstick: Props to you, Japan. I didn't see that coming. Megatron: You're an idiot, Starscream! “Agreed!” everyone said. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ While everyone agreed starscream was good for a laugh, they agreed he wouldn’t win against that world’s Rainbow Dash. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Rainbow Dash (*Cues: MLP: FIM - Sonic Rainboom (Just An Old Mare's Tale)*) Wiz: Rainbow Dash is a Pegasus Pony from Equestria, the magical land of ponies. “And here comes the champ! Ready to beat down the competition!” said Spike in a tv host voice, and rainbow Dash was bowing as if she was in front of a huge crowed, getting quite a few laughs Boomstick: *Sighs* “Ha! Keep sighing pal. It ain't gonna stop the show from saying how awesome i am,” boasted the Blue mare. Wiz: After dropping out of Flight School, Rainbow found a job in Ponyville as Weather Manager. She is a strong, agile flyer with great durability and resilience. She can smash through trees and solid rock and get right back up. She is also training to join the Wonderbolts, a superb team of flyers who are kind of like the Blue Angels. “Which I’m already in the reserves,” she boasted even more. “Uh-oh, i think i see her head getting bigger,” teased Spike, getting a round of laughter from the group even Rainbow Dash found it funny even if it was directed at her. Boomstick: ...Except, they're ponies. Wiz: She is also a black belt in karate. “Oh ya i forgot you knew martial arts,” said Twilight. “She sure does and you're looking at the griffin who taught her,” bragged Gilda, surprising Spike, Twilight, and even Pinkie Pie. Boomstick: How does a pony learn karate, let alone master it? “I’m just awesome like that.” bragged Rainbow dash. Background Height: Approx. 4' Flight School dropout Weather Manager Winner of 'Best Young Flyer's Competition Unnatural durability Black belt in Karate Apple Bloom kicks a punching bag, only for her to shake a few seconds and fall to the ground. (*Cues: MLP: FIM - Iron Pony*) Wiz: As a Pegasus pony, Rainbow can control weather. She can use the clouds in the sky to manipulate lighting strikes and precipitation. Also, she can create and control giant tornadoes. “Yep her weather control is pretty imazing… when she’s not napping on the job,” snarked Twilight. “Oh come on you caught sleeping on the job one time,” complained Rainbow Dash only to get a flat stare and a raised eyebrow from the lavender princess. “Heheh ok maybe a few… 12 times heh.” grinned Rainbow sheepishly. Boomstick: She's also got some other moves, like the Buccaneer Blaze, which is apparently so amazing it can't be shown on screen. And, somehow, it creates a huge explosion. “And what causes those explosions is a secret,” Rainbow Dash teased. Movelist Super Speed Struct Fantastic Filly Flash Cloud barrel weave Cloud spinning Rainblow Dry Buccaneer Blaze Wiz: Rainbow often brags that she is the fastest in the world. And you know what? She's right. “Awwwwww ya!” cheered Rainbow Dash. Wiz: By calculations according to this guy. (image of brony holding a bunch of MLP merchandise) everyone:... Rainbow Dash can fly up to five times the speed of sound with ease. This is apparent through the mach cone that often forms around Rainbow, which indicates that she has broken the sound barrier. And the angle of which proves she can reach up to Mach 5 speeds. “Ya though even have a hard time controlling my movement at those speeds,” admitted a humble Rainbow Dash. Boomstick: This is a pony, a baby horse girl toy. Why is it so awesome? “Because this baby horse is a bad flank!” Rainbow Dash bragged for everyone. Getting her friends to smile and laugh. Wiz: And upon reaching Mach 5, she entered hyper sonic speeds to create the Sonic Rainboom. With this, her speed doubles instantaneously to Mach 10. And somehow the resulting sonic boom completely shatters the visible light spectrum. “And is what help me and the rest our friends gain our cutie marks,” Twilight said. Giving Rainbow Dash a grateful smile. “Heheh no problem Twilight,” Rainbow said Bashfully. "It’s rare to see her humble like that," Gilda whispered to Spike. “Tell me about,” he agreed. Boomstick: Not to mention the sonic boom itself is apparently strong enough to split solid rock and shake entire mountains. Sonic Rainboom Hypersonic Speed of Mach 10 Top Speed: 7,600 mph Creates a Rainbow Powerful Shockwave Can pull 90 degree turns Wiz: Rainbow is brash, athletic, and extremely competitive. But while she's steadfast and loyal, she sometimes cheats to get her way. Attributes Brash & Arrogant Extremely competitive Brave & Loyal Athletic on both ground & air Top Speed: 3,800 MPH “Ya… not my proudest moments,” admitted Rainbow Dash, voice filled to the brim with guilt. But a hug from both Twilight and Pinkie was able to cheer her up. Boomstick: Well... let's make it fight a giant robot. Rainbow Dash: Yeeeeaaaaahh! “Go me!” the blue mare cheered. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ There was no need to choose teams everyone was going to cheer on Rainbow Dash. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Wiz: Alright, the combatants are set, let's end this debate once and for all Boomstick: Time for a Death Battle! Death Battle The F-15 Eagle Jet Fire flies in to reveal itself to be bumbling Starscream coming in for a land in his humanoid robot form. Starscream: Who dares challenge the mighty Starscream? “Oh you’ll see~,” the group sang. (*Cues: MLP:FIM - Rarity's Fashion Show*) Out of the blinding sun, a Pegasus pony named Rainbow Dash flies down in a landing seeing Starscream. Rainbow Dash: Hi there. FIGHT! Starscream: *mockingly laughs* A pony? I'll crush you in an instant. Prepare to be annihilated. That got a glare from the rainbow themed Pegasus as her friends tried to come her down. Rainbow Dash: You talk a lot. Rainbow flies around Starscream in many different directions, bucks him in the heel with no effect on him, Starscream backhands Rainbow out of anger. Her friends winced as they saw that worlds version of her getting struck by a metal arm. Starscream: That. Is. it. I am going to kill you! Rainbow Dash: Tag, you're it! “Ha! Tag, that brings back memories!” laughed Gilda remembering the times she and Rainbow Dash use to play that as kids. Starscream shouts in anger as he turns back into the F-15 Eagle Jet Fire and chases Rainbow Dash in the sky. He proceeds to fire his Gatling gun, which Rainbow Dash easily evades. He then fires missiles, which also fail to hit their mark. In Starscream's POV, we see him preparing to lock onto Rainbow Dash. That got everyone worried. Starscream: Alright. Don't move. “Please move,” whispered Lightning Dust. Just as Starscream successfully locks on, Rainbow Dash flies off, immediately undoing it, causing his monitor to say "TARGET LOSS". Starscream: Blast it! Everyone breathed a sigh of relief. “Thank Harmony,” breathed Twilight. After he says this, Rainbow Dash appears face-to-face with him, making multiple funny faces at him. “Bwahahahaha!” laughed the blue mare along with the rest of her friends. Starscream: Hey! What are you doing? Stop that! This whole time, Rainbow Dash was standing on Starscream, who didn't even notice. “How is he not noticing a pegasus sitting on him?” questioned a confused Spike. “No idea…” gilda sad just as confused. Rainbow Dash: You're not very good at this game, are you? She leaps off of him, which Starscream clearly flees and then he proceeds to follow Rainbow Dash upward into the clouds . "hey isn't that derpy?" asked Spike as he saw the two fighters fly past the yellow mane pegasus. (*Cues: Spectrum*) Starscream then transforms back into his robot form and hovers. Starscream: Where are you? Show yourself! Rainbow Dash quickly flies in with a rain cloud and places it over Starscream. Starscream: Hey! “Oh this is going to be good,” both Lightning Dust and Rainbow Dash said as they both new what DB Dash was planing on doing. Rainbow Dash repeatedly kicks the rain cloud, causing Starscream to be hit repeatedly with lightning, eventually causing him to fall to the ground. Rainbow Dash walks on the ground up to her downed opponent, but she is suddenly struck by the Null Ray, knocking her back and momentarily dazing her. Starscream laughs, but then Rainbow Dash recovers. “Oh cheap shot huh?” growled Rainbow Dash in annoyance. “Did that moron just use a weapon that only harms machens?”Gilda deadpanned. Rainbow Dash: Alright! It... is... on! Rainbow Dash flies around Starscream multiple times, eventually creating a tornado, which he is trapped in. He attempts to escape by turning back into his jet form, only for one of his wings to break off, causing him to fall to the ground once again. Rainbow Dash lands and prepares to charge at him. Starscream: Wait! Wait! I'm sorry! Please don't hurt me! Please! “What?” everyone asked in disbelief. Hearing this, Rainbow Dash slows and eventually stops in her tracks. “What are you thinking other me!?” yelled a frustrated Rainbow Dash. “FINNISH HIM!!!” screamed Pinkie in a deep voice while wearing a skull like helmet. “What the heck is that thing?” asked Spike as he stared at the weird headwear. “Meh, just a spoiler for season 2.” replaid Pinkie Pie as she tossed the helmet to the side Starscream: I'll... I'll join the herd. I'll be a good Decepticon from now on. “Maybe he means it.” hoped Spike. As he is saying this, Starscream is preparing to lock onto the idle Rainbow Dash. “Or not,” Spike said. Starscream: Please... just let me go. “Oh that dirty little…” Gilda trailed off. Rainbow Dash: Well... I don't know. I mean... I know should love and tolerate, but... Starscream successfully locks onto Rainbow Dash, preparing to fire everything. “Uh-oh…” everyone muttered. Rainbow Dash: Wait... what's that? Starscream's chest reveals his homing missiles. Starscream: Die! “NO!” Twilight screamed not wanting to see her friend getting hurt. He fires the homing missiles, which head toward Rainbow Dash. “RUN!!!” Rainbow screamed to her other self. Rainbow Dash: Oh my gosh! Rainbow Dash flies into the sky and up into the clouds as the missile follow. Starscream stands waiting with his arms crossed in his "Any minute now" pose. Everyone lean forward in their seats as they waited anxiously for the outcome. (*Cues: MLP: FIM - Sonic Rainboom*) Rainbow Dash then flies downward with the missiles still following her, flying so fast that she has broken the sound barrier. She then unleashes the Sonic Rainboom. Starscream is stunned as Rainbow Dash flies right past him, leaving him too late to dodge the homing missiles. They strike, destroying his lower body, as Rainbow Dash smashes into Starscream and then uses her Bucaneer Blaze, which tears Starscream apart off-screen. Rainbow Dash then flies towards Starscream's torso. The group cheered and Lightning Dust and Gilda where even hugging as everyone was just happy to see their friend’s other self was ok. Rainbow Dash: Aw yeah! That was awesome! “I’ll say!” cried out Rainbow Dash, overfilled with joy. (*Cues: Transformers (2008) - Decepticons*) Then Starscream's Spark emerges from his torso, floating in the air. “Oh ya… immortal,” deadpanned Spike. Starscream: You haven't won! I'm invincible! My Spark lives! You can never defeat Star... Twilight was starting to get worried. “He’s right though. How will Rainbow Dash beat him no-” He is cut off by Rainbow Dash, who eats and swallows his Spark. Everyone stares wide eyed and Twilight’s previous question dies in her throat. Rainbow was the First to shake off her shock and give out the biggest grin she’s ever had and said, “So~ Awesome!” K.O.! Results (*Cues: Rainbow Rhapsody - Makkon*) Boomstick: Forget all doubt, that pony is a monster! “Heh I try,” bragged Rainbow Dash as she was checking her hoof in a in a nonchalant way. Wiz: Rainbow's speed and agility were more than a match for the clumsy Starscream, and it doesn't help that his aim is even worse than a Stormtrooper's. Not to mention the Null Ray is designed to destroy electronics, not living ponies. “Just like I said during the fight,” Gilda reminded that she did point that out. Boomstick: She just ate a Transformer! “And it was TASTY!” Rainbow joked, as she rubbed her tummy as if she really did what her DB counter has just done. Getting a few laughs from her friends. Wiz: Yes, and while Rainbow might experience some mild indigestion, Starscream's not going anywhere anytime soon. Boomstick: Well, she put the pwn in pony. Everyone ;laughed at that pun, finding this one at least a little bit funny. Wiz: The winner is Rainbow Dash. “Darn straight I did!” the mare cheered to the heavens. END! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Boomstick: Next time on Death Battle They see smoke and piles of wreckage around. Suddenly, they see a figure walk out the smoke, revealing himself to everyone eyes. A man covered from head to toe in some kind of super armor which is colored grayish-green. His visor is gold which keeps his face hidden from view. Then some text appeared on screen. NEW CHALLENGER! They see the man in armor again who looks more and more like a super soldier as the girls see him using various weapons against some aliens and as he plows through them. His name is also revealed. MASTER CHIEF VS (cues DOOM E1M1 Metal Remix) The music starts off soft but the heavy metal music starts getting louder and louder until it sets off a loud booming heavy metal guitar that nearly send the group flying from the sound waves. They see a fiery blaze and can barely see anything within it. Then, they see a hand punching through a body and it's also gripping the spine. Now they see a helmet, part of it gets torn off and the group see part of his face that shows rage and bloodlust in his eye. His name says it all as he slays demonic monsters with all kinds of awesome weaponry and brutal skills. DOOMGUY ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ “Hey, thanks for watching with us,” Rainbow said to her two friends. “Well we were bored and this seemed like a way to kill some time,” Gilda said nonchalantly, waving a paw in the air. “That and seeing you fight a giant robot was pretty cool,” Lightning Dust said, chuckling a bit. The two weren’t gonna say that they really liked the show, they had to act cool and stuff. They noticed a box began to glow off in the corner of the room. “What’s that?” “It’s just the box the show came in. After each episode, it gives us some stuff on the characters that fought. Wonder what’s in it this time?” Rainbow asked, flying over to the box and opening it. Rainbow’s mouth dropped open in shock, confusing everyone in the room. “What’s inside, Dash?” Spike asked. Rainbow put her hooves inside the box and pulled out a good size trophy with the words ‘Death Battle Winner’ on it. “A trophy, that’s what,” Rainbow said, doing a little victory dance. “And some little figures of us,” Pinkie said, pulling out mini figures of themselves. Rainbow looked at the figures and saw the ones of her friends, causing her to wonder what they’re doing at the moment when she got an idea. “Hey Pinkie, you mind handing me those?” Rainbow asked, looking at the figures. “Sure,” Pinkie said, handing them over. “Thanks. I have to go do something, so I’ll be back in a it. Later,” Rainbow said, flying away. Once in the air, Rainbow started to look around for something. After a few seconds of searching, she flew over Sugarcube Corners and saw something interesting inside. Opening the door, Rainbow flew inside and towards a table were her friends were sitting. “Hey, girls.” Rainbow said, getting their attention. “Hey Dash, what’cha got there?” Applejack asked, seeing the trophy in her friend’s hooves. “Well, it’s just a trophy for the winner of Death Battle,” Rainbow said, holding it out towards her friends. “You really did win?” Rarity asked, shocked by this revelation. “Yeah, and here’s how I did it,” Rainbow said as she started to tell them about the battle. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ CHAPTER END! Next time MASTER CHIEF VS DOOMGUY. Fox McCloud vs Bucky O'HareAs everyone settled down, Sonata sat down and started to bounce in place. Her two sisters groaned as they took a seat, clearly displeased about their sister’s excitement. “Let’s get this over with,” Aria said, crossing her hooves over her chest. “What’s got you in a bad mood?” Rainbow asked, floating in the air. “You’ll see once this battle starts. We had to deal with Sonata watching that rabbit so many times that it became torture for us,” Adagio said uninterested. “Oh, you girls are just overreacting, how bad can it be?” Rarity asked, enjoying their misery. “You’ll see,” Adagio and Aria said at the same time. “Just start the episode so we can get it over with.” Spike grabbed the remote and pressed play. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Interlude (*Cues: Invader - Jim Johnston*) Wiz: In the depths of space, who knows what awaits mankind? “From what i was able to get from Discord, “a group of weirdos,” said Twilight with a shrug. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~[Meanwhile… with a group of weirdos.]~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ We find our group of gods of chaos and order in the same void of space that we left them in, doing random thing to pass the time. Trepp and Alpha were playing a game of pong using an asteroid as the ball, and Harmony was currently putting Deadman in a The Nagata Lock III submission hold. Trepp suddenly stop during the game letting the asteroid fly past him and crashing into some random planet. “Huh? Is something the matter Trepp?” asked Alpha in worry but he didn’t receive an answer as the blue chaos god just looked up for a few seconds before shaking his head and going back to his usual bored expression. “No it’s nothing… it’s just i had the sudden urge to smack Discord upside the head,” said the bored god of mischief getting an odd look from Alpha. “How about you Deadman?” he asked his fellow chaos god. “ALL I KNOW IS PAIN!!!” scream said chaos god as Harmony tightened her hold on him causing the rest of the group to hear the sound of bones snapping and muscles ripping. “Ya your right, I’m just hearing things,” replaid Trepp completely ignoring his friends real answer in favor of his own. Alpha could only sigh at the insanity that he had to deal with. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~[now back to something somewhat normal.]~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Boomstick: Probably some brain-sucking aliens who need an introduction to my fist. “HECK YA!” cheered Rainbow dash agreeing with Boomstick’s method. Wiz: But what if the final frontier was a little more... furry? Boomstick: Fox McCloud, captain of the Star Fox commandos... Wiz: And Bucky O' Hare, captain of a galactic-wide rebellion. “Whooooo!” cheered Sonata in glee much to her sister’s annoyance. Boomstick: He's Wiz and I'm Boomstick. Wiz: And it's our job to analyze their weapons, armor, and skills, to find out who would win a Death Battle. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Fox McCloud (*Cues: Star Fox Adventures - Main Theme*) General Pepper: It's about time you showed up, Fox. Fox: I'll do my best. Wiz: In his youth, Fox was a pilot prodigy, studying at the Cornerian flight academy. He was raised by his single father James, who founded a team of mercenaries known throughout the universe as Star Fox. “That’s a pretty cool name,” said Rainbow Dash. Background Age: 28 Weight: 59 kg | 130 lbs Height: 173 cm | 5'8" Cornerian Flight Academy drop-out Trained by James McCloud & Peppy Hare Personality was modeled after Shigeru Miyamoto! Seriously! Boomstick: With Pigma, the ugliest pig you've ever seen. “Looks trustworthy enough to me." Said Aria sarcastically. Boomstick: And Peppy, a rabbit older than the greeters at Walmart. Wiz: But it wasn't long before something went horribly wrong... (*Cues: Star Fox (SNES) Intro*) Wiz: The Lylat system had endured decades of peace, but rumblings of civil war stirred. The empire of planet Venom was rising with their new leader Andross... Boomstick: A giant evil monkey with Rayman hands! “Still less bizarre than Discord.” Applejack commented. “And after meeting something like Deadman something like that isn’t too weird anymore,” Twilight said. Wiz: Fearful of triggering a civil war, the Cornerian republic secretly hired the Star Fox freelancers to investigate. But upon arrival, James was betrayed by Pigma, who was secretly in league with the monkey mogul. “That dirty pig!” Yelled the bearer of the element of loyalty, rightfully outraged by the concept of a teammate betraying their comrades. Boomstick: Which is why pigs are for eating, and nothing else. Fox (and Fluttershy): What?! “Mmm~ I could go for some bacon…” Sonata said, licking her lips. “So can Adagio,” snickered Rarity hoping to fluster the siren. But Adagio just smirked at the bearer of Generosity and gave her a half lidded stare. “Oh trust me I am, and when i get back home i’m planning helping myself to some very Special bacon,” Said licking her lips causing Twilight to fume at the siren’s blatant plans for Sunset. (*Cues: Star Fox (SNES) Title Theme*) Wiz: Outraged at the Cornerian government for refusing to respond, Fox McCloud abandoned the academy. “Wait, his father gets killed and the government doesn't even bat an eye?!” Starlight exclaimed in both shock and rage. “What the hell?!” Wiz: Under Peppy's wing, he formed a new Star Fox team, alongside fellow drop-outs Falco Lombardi and Slippy Toad. The result was a squad like nothing seen before. MC: Emergency! Emergency! Incoming enemy fighters. Prepare for launch. (*Cues: Corneria Theme - Star Fox (1993)*) Boomstick: Fox pilots an Arwing, a nimble starfighter with a lot of power. The entire group could only marvel at the sight of the aircraft, taking in the elegant yet obviously aerodynamic design. “It's beautiful…” Rainbow whispered, a single tear leaving her eye. Boomstick: It has twin plasma lasers and can carry up to nine smart bombs, each of which can take out an entire squadron in just one shot. It also creates a reflector shield when Fox does a... well, you know... Peppy (and Pinkie): Do a barrel roll! Rainbow immediately interjected. “That's not a barrel roll.” Pinkie blinked. “Wait, what?” “Well, y’see…” She was about to explain, only for Wiz to do it for her. Wiz: Actually, a barrel roll is when the plane spins in a helix path, as if wrapping around the outside of a barrel. Fox´s trademark maneuver, in which he spins the fighter in place, is technically called an aileron roll. “Yeah, basically everything he just said.” Rainbow nodded. “Awww, another meme ruined!” Pinkie pouted. “Wait, how do you know about that kind of stuff?” Starlight asked. Rainbow smirked. “I'm a Wonderbolt, details like this are covered in basic training.” Boomstick: (Wolf O'Donnell voice) Can't let you do that, Wizard! Wiz: Do what? Boomstick: Ruin the joke! “Too late.” Pinkie mumbled. Arwing T&B-H1 Lasers Upgrades: Twin, Hyper Smart Bombs Carry capacity: 9 G-Diffusion Shielding G-Diffuser NTD-FX1 Plasma Engine A single line of text Max atmospheric speed: Mach 4.2 Wiz: Regardless, the Arwings are equipped with four advanced G-Diffusers, which reduce gravitational forces on pilots in flight. “Hmm… equipment like that could be useful for Pegasus guards and the Wonderbolts…” Twilight mused to herself as she took notes, with Rainbow leaning over her shoulder to get a look. Wiz: Even so, the ultra-fast Arwings exert enormous pressure. Exposure to intense G-forces causes blood to drop from a pilot's brain to his feet. To prevent this, and thus fly the Arwings to the best of their ability, the Star Fox team actually amputated their legs, replacing them with cybernetics. “Woah! Seriously?!” Spike exclaimed. Boomstick: Holy shit! That's some hardcore dedication! “I’ll say!” agreed Rainbow Dash wondering if she would be that willing to go that far for her dreams. (*Cues: Star Wolf Theme - Star Fox: Assault*) Boomstick: When Fox isn't engaged in an aerial dog...er...foxfight, he relies on his trusty blaster pistol, which he always carries. This little beauty has been heavily modified over the years and can charge up a super powerful shot. Wiz: Fox also carries two portable G-Diffusers, one acts as an all-purpose reflector, though he cannot move or attack while using it. The second is a booster pack for highly maneuverable flight. These G-Diffusers allow Fox to manipulate his own gravity to perform two superhuman fighting moves, the speedy Fox Illusion, and the Fire Fox. “Dang, that's impressive.” Applejack smiled. “Hmm… wonder if I could pull that off…” Rainbow thought. “I’m sure you can with a little practice,” Fluttershy said encouragingly. Arsenal & Abilities Blaster Heavily modified Interchangeable modes: Rapid-fire Charge shot Full charge destroys armored turrets Reflector Barrier Repels projectiles, even Arwing lasers Useless against physical impacts Booster Pack Fox Illusion Fire Fox Boomstick: Fox has taken down entire armies on his own, and unlike dear old dead dad, he's defeated Andross not once, but twice. “And finally avenging his dad.” Said Starlight with a proud smile. Strengths & Feats Jack of All Trades, lacking in none Cool & collected Killed Andross twice, plus a clone Ended the Lylat Wars Regularly bests Star Wolf Battled a whole planet of dinosaurs Stopped the Aparoid Invasion Defeated the Anglar Emperor Wiz: He is absolutely fearless, though he often relies on his brainier wingmates to handle strategy and intel. Boomstick: 'Cause when he comes up with a plan, he ends up falling into a black hole! "Clever like a fox", my ass. Everyone laughed at this. Weaknesses Jack of All Trades, best in none Not very cunning Shoots first, asks questions later... sometimes a good thing Doomed to a pathetic & lonely existence for no good reason after Star Fox Command on DS Wiz: Regardless, he has proven himself more than capable of saving the day on his own, time and time again, he is the leader of the second generation of Star Fox, the greatest commando team in the galaxy. And that alone should prove one thing... Boomstick: You don't fuck around with Fox McCloud! Fox: I see 'em up ahead! Let's rock and roll! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ The group were impressed and had great respect for the star Fox commander. “I’m sure if he was a member of the wonderbolts he would be one of the greatest,” said Rainbow Dash with nothing but respect in her voice. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Bucky O'Hare Wiz: I know what you're thinking, "Just who is Captain Bucky O'Hare?" Well, prepare to be reminded or introduced to the greatest cartoon rabbit since Bugs Bunny. As the music started up, Sonata started bouncing around with glee while Aria and Adagio held their ears in dismay. “Why?! Why did they have to bring this song back?!” Aria groaned in anger. Suddenly, Sonata started to sing, with Pinkie happily joining in. (*Cues: Bucky O'Hare - Theme Song*) Sonata: In another dimension, another time and space! Pinkie: A parallel universe was fallin' on its face! Sonata: When out of the chaos, who else could it be? Both: But the animal adventurers of S.P.A.C.E.! Sonata: Bucky, Captain Bucky O'Hare! He goes where no ordinary rabbit would dare! Pinkie: If your Righteous Indignation has suffered a hit- Sonata: And your photon accelerator's broken a bit- Pinkie: And you're losing your mind, and your having a fit- Both: Get the funky fresh rabbit who can take care of it! Spike and Rainbow Dash join in: Bucky, Captain Bucky O'Hare! Pinkie and Sonata: You say Bucky? I said Bucky! Rainbow and Spike: Bucky O'Hare!! Sonata: Let's croak up some toads!! (toad croaks) “Well that was a fun little song.” Starlight smiled as she applauded their performance before turning to Aria and Adagio. “I don't see why you two were so bothered by it…” Aria groaned. "Ever since the show came out, she wouldn't stop singing that stupid song over and over and over again!” “When the show finally ended we thought we'd finally heard the end of that stupid song!" Adagio continued. “AND NOW IT’S STUCK IN OUR HEADS AGAIN!!” Rarity couldn't help but giggle at this. (*Cues: Green Planet (J64 Mix) - Bucky O'Hare*) Boomstick: (singing) Bucky, Captain Bucky O'Hare! Ha ha, oh, the '80s. Wiz: Graduate of the esteemed Genus Academy and trained in combat by the mysterious warrior Damaron Jabok, Bucky O'Hare and his motley crew defend the Aniverse – yes, the 'Aniverse' – from the evil Toad Empire, who are basically amphibian Nazis... if Hitler was Skynet. “Who’s Hitler?” asked Fluttershy meekly but quickly hid behind her doom plushie once she saw the dark looks from the sirens and even Twilight. “Trust me fluttershy you don’t want to know,” growled out the princess of friendship remembering what she read about the desist leader of Germany. “We might of been bad guys but even we saw what he did a pure evil,” stated Aria in a foul mood. Nodding her head Adagio said, “ even we wouldn't go that far.” “A REAL monster,” hissed out Sonata. Boomstick: I bet you wanna watch the show now, huh? Komplex: Do I have your undivided attention now? Everyone shuddered at the sound of his voice. Background Age: Mid 20s Weight: Approx. 45 kg | 100 lbs Height: 150 cm | 4'11" Genus Academy graduate Trained by Damaron Jabok Comic book concept originally created in 1978 (*Cues: Unknown theme*) Boomstick: Bucky captains the best-named spaceship of all time, the Righteous Indignation... “Oh my gosh that name is AWESOME!” Rainbow squeed. “When I get my own Wonderbolts Team I'm totally naming it that!” Boomstick: ...which is now the new name for my penis! “...aaaaand Boomstick ruined it.” She groaned while the Dazzlings giggled. Wiz: Ahem, this tough frigate needs a full crew to operate, but its pivoting Maser Cannon packs a deadly punch. Boomstick: Enough about my genitals, Wiz, let's get back to the rabbit! Pinkie and the Dazzlings snickered, Rarity simply rolled her eyes. Righteous Indignation First space frigate of S.P.A.C.E. 1 Master Cannon Standard sub-light speed drive Aldeberan sensors & scanners Houses 1 Toad Croaker speeder Heavily modified Betelgeusian Banana Runner Boomstick: Bucky's no slouch on the ground, he always carries one automatic laser pistol, powerful enough to slice through solid metal, he also brings along two energy grenades. When detonated, the resulting blast is massive. Wiz: Bucky also wears a very reliable jetpack, which is fast enough to apparently outrace explosions, the velocity of a detonation can reach over 2,000 meters per second. This means in zero-G, Bucky's jetpack can reach speeds over mach-five, which would turn any normal rabbit into mush. “Eeep!” squicked out a green faced Fluttershy thinking of angel bunny going that fast. “I totally want a jetpack that can fly that fast!” Pinkie said, with Sonata cheering in agreement. Arsenal & Abilities Laser Pistol Automatic Self-cleaning Can fire a constant stream Grenades Carries 2 Thrown detonation: Small, concentrated blast Manual detonation: Large, uncontrolled blast Jetpack Boomstick: But not this funky, fresh rabbit! And yes, that's a direct quote. “Sure is!” cheered Sonata who was about to sing the song again but some glares from her sister’s made her stop. Wiz: Bucky will avoid a fight if can, preferring to outsmart his opponents rather than resort to brute force. Bucky O'Hare: I got some serious pondering to do. “A wise strategy…” Said Starlight. Boomstick: However, he's a skilled martial artist, an expert marksman, and his acrobatic ability is legendary. He can leap well over one hundred feet in the air with a single hop. "that's pretty impressive for rabbit," complemented Applejack. Strengths & Feats Legendary acrobatic ability Smart & cunning Expert marksman Can leap over 30 m / 100 ft Ended the Toad Wars Defeated Komplex twice Led galaxy-wide resistance Wiz: He's a cunning warrior and leader. Bucky is responsible for constructing a massive, galactic-wide army to combat the Toad Empire, and succeeded in dethroning their robotic ruler, Komplex, not once, but twice. Boomstick: Anyone who would dare to fight, should beware the deadly Captain Bucky O'Hare. Weaknesses Lacks defensive gear Far too trusting of strangers Heavily relies on crew in combat Bucky O'Hare: Attention all hands, battle stations! Bucky, Jenny, and Dead-Eye: Let's croak toads! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ “YAY GO BUCKY!!” cheered Sonata as the young siren getting ready to sing her favorite cartoon theme but another glare from Adagio stopped her. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Death Battle (*Cues: Unknown theme*) We open with the classic Star Fox crew in their Arwings. Fox: "We're heading out! All aircraft report." Peppy : "This is Peppy, all systems go!" Slippy : "Don't forget me!" Slippy's ship flies in. "teehee! silly Slippy!" laughed Pinkie Pie. Falco : "Slippy, what are you doing? Hurry up!" The Righteous Indignation arrives. Slippy: "Don't worry." Bucky: "Attention all hands, battle stations." Fox: "Huh?" "... I can see where this is going," muttered Twilight. Bucky: "Let's croak toads!!" "oh..." the rest of the group muttered. Peppy: "Slippy, watch out!" Bucky begins to shoot Slippy's ship with a Maser Cannon. Slippy: "Ah! I'm hit! Fox!!!" Slippy's ship blows up. "SLIPPY NO!" cried Fluttershy. Bucky: "Mission accomplished!" “Wait, did the just kill Slippy... because he was a toad?” Spike asked in both sorrow and a bit of anger. “That's kinda racist.” “Well in the show ALL amphibians were evil so you can’t really blame Bucky for attacking a member of a race that has ether enslaved an entire race or wiped it out,” said Sonata surprising everyone who thought she was just a air head. Fox retaliates and shoots down Bucky's ship using a smart bomb, causing it to explode and plummet down towards a strange planet. “No! Not the Righteous Indignation!” Cried out Sonata. “Aw man! I wanted to see a space fight!” Pinkie complained. Falco: "Scratch one bogey." Fox: There's one more to go. Fox follows Bucky's ship down onto the planet. The following title card appears: DEATH BATTLE! No. 30 ??? Random ass planet Fox McCloud VS Bucky O'Hare ........................ (*Cues: Asteroid Belt - Star Fox Assault*) On the planet, the Righteous Indignation is destroyed. As Fox's Arwing lands, Bucky jumps out of the wreckage. Fox then jumps out of his Arwing. “Congratulations Bucky.”Adagio commented. “You killed that guy's friend and now he's out for blood.” “This should prove interesting…” Aria smirked. Fox: Come on! FIGHT! Fox runs towards Bucky as he tries to jump away from his opponent, but Fox uses his Fox Illusion to dash by Bucky. He then proceeds to kick Bucky repeatedly, but misses his last strike as the rabbit sidesteps behind him. Fox notices, but can't do anything as Bucky kicks him upwards three times then punches him into the Righteous Indignation wreckage. “That was for the Righteous Indignation and it’s crew, Fox!” yelled Sonata with a raised hoof. (*Cues: Aparoid City - Star Fox Assault*) Bucky walks forward and fires his laser, but Fox uses the reflector to sent it back to Bucky who barely dodges it and hides behind the boulder. Fox uses his blaster pistol multiple shots, then super charges his shot, as Bucky sees that Fox is about to launch it, he hops out of there and blasted the boulder into rubble. Fox sees Bucky up in the air and tries to use his blaster pistol in the air, but Bucky hops over Fox, crushing him, after hopping a third time, Fox charges upwards from his booster pack creating the Fire Fox maneuver. “Man Fox would of been a pancake if he didn’t have his fire fox move,” commented Spike. (*Cues: SSBB - Corneria Theme*) Fox is now in aerial positions, and shoots but Bucky evades from each of the charged shots. Both leaders are now shooting and evading in the air, then fires a grenade at Fox, then Fox uses his Reflector shield and sends back to the user. Fox then fights Bucky with a barrage of aerial attacks. As Fox uses the Fox Illusion, Bucky latches and hangs onto Fox while he's trying to force him to let go as he later used the Reflector. Bucky shoots the booster pack, sending him back to the ground. “Now it’s an even playing field!” cheered Applejack as she was getting into the fight. “Now let's see who has the better skill fighting on land, a fox or a rabbit.” said Rarity as she too was getting into the fight. (*Cues: Boss 3 - Star Fox Assault*) Bucky then fires barrage of blaster shots as Fox uses the Reflector. As he continues, he throws a grenade close to where Fox is standing. Knowing that Fox can't move while using it, which Fox manages to dodge using the Fox Illusion maneuver, but ends up losing his bionic legs. “Oh dear.” muttered Fluttershy as she hated this episode for having to animal critters fighting so brutally. (*Cues: Aparoid Queen 2 - Star Fox Assault*) However, Fox manages to get another jet pack up and running, and crashes into Bucky. He then chokes Bucky, “...... no.” whispered Sonata with fear in her voice. (*Cues: Andross - Star Fox 64*) then blows his head off with a charged beam to the face. K.O. “BUCKY, NOOOOOO!!!!” Sonata cried. “YESSSSSSS!!!” cheered Adagio and Aria. Fox is seen standing next to the dead Slippy Toad and rips off his legs and replaces them on his as he flies away on his Arwing as Blinky assesses the damage. Results (*Cues: Opening Theme - Star Fox Assault*) Blinky: Calamity and woe! Wiz: Calamity and woe indeed. Bucky's long awaited spotlight didn't last long. “No~!” cried Sonata. Boomstick: Considering foxes eat hares, I'm not surprised. This causes Sonaya to cry harder. “There there,” soothed Fluttershy as she patted the former sirens back. Wiz: ...Right. First off, yes, the Arwing trumped the Righteous Indignation, as its weaponry, shielding and maneuverability were simply outclassed. Boomstick: But not before croaking the worst toad of all time. Slippy: Fox!!! (*Slippy's Arwing is destroyed*) Boomstick: Hehe, I love this job. Fluttershy’s eye twitched. Boomstick: Bucky's ship was a tough old bird, so a fight on the ground was inevitable. Wiz: Both Fox and Bucky had blow by blow counters. Fox's Reflector and Bucky's acrobatics could avoid laser fire. Fox is fearless, but Bucky is cunning. Fox is faster on land, “This two just seem to counter each other,” commented Starlight as she kept trying to find out what broke the stalemate. (*Cues: Great Fox Rock - Star Fox Adventures*) Wiz: but Bucky is faster in the air. The deciding factor was experience. “Shining all ways told be experience can trump even the strongest of soldiers,” said Twilight as she remembered her brother words on the subject of being a solder. Boomstick: Fox has been a major player in more wars than Bucky, and single-handedly ended all of them. Wiz: At his own request. Fox: I'll go it alone from here. “I think i just found somepony new to look up to,” said Rainbow Dash as she put Fox right up there with the wonderbolts from the past when it came to ponies to look up to. Boomstick: Like a real man... fox... fox-man! Wiz: Also, Bucky always had a squad of troops at his back during ground combats. But when Star Fox does an away mission, Fox is usually all on his own, even when fighting an entire planet of dinosaurs. “He fought a PLANET full of dinosaurs!?” THAT. IS. AWESOME!!” Rainbow cheered. Boomstick: In the end, Bucky choked. “Boo!” yelled Sonata. Wiz: The winner is Fox McCloud. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Boomstick: Next time on Death Battle. (Cues Terminator Theme) The group sees a creepy looking robot facing off against another that looks more like a cyborg with a visor covering his upper face. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ “Well at least that’s over,” Aria said, getting to her hooves as Adagio nodded. “Yes, now let’s just get the stuff from the box and get out of here,” Adagio said, pushing her purple haired sister towards the box. Sonata sighed as she followed them, feeling a bit sad at the outcome of the battle. Once everyone was near the glowing box, Pinkie opened it and looked inside. She stuck her head and arms inside tossed a small box to Fluttershy and then pulled out a replica of Fox’s airwing while saying, “Oooohhhh.” “What is it, Pinkie?” Starlight asked, looking at the tiny ship in interest. Looking at her friends, Pinkie said, “There’s a bunch of these ships and things in here.” “Things?” Twilight asked. “Yeah,” Pinkie said, reaching into the box. She pulled out a grey square with a few short silver things on it and said, “There’s a bunch of these things in here.” “Let me see,” Adagio said, walking towards the pink mare. Looking at the thing in Pinkie’s hoof, Adagio takes it and began to move the silver things around causing the ship to float out of Pinkie’s hoof. “Woah, those things can fly?” Rainbow asked surprisingly. “They can as they’re remote controlled cars or ships in that sense,” Adagio said, handing the controller to Pinkie. “They’re a somewhat popular toy that kids play with but you need a controller to make them fly or move.” Everyone grabs one as Spike reached into the box and pulled out another familiar space ship and package. Looking at Sonata, Spike said, “Hey Sonata, there’s something here for you.” Be the curious mare, Sonata walked towards the baby dragon to see what he meant and gasped. In his claws was a replica of Bucky’s ship and a wrapped package the size of a shoe box. Sonata took the pack and ripped off the wrapping to a red cloth and a green bunny ears headband. “Oh my gosh,” Sonata said, pulling the cloth and unfolded it to see a familiar jumpsuit and cape. “I always wanted something like this,” she said, hugging the jumpsuit like a stuffed animal. “I think there's something else in there,” Rainbow said, flying above the former siren. Being the curious girl she was, Sonata looked inside the box to see another wrapped package. Tearing the wrapping apart, Sonata gasped as she pulled out a CD. “Oh my gosh! It's the extended version of Bucky’s theme song!” Aria and Adagio could only gasp in horror. “NO! NOT AGAIN!” They both shouted, making a dive for the disk… only for Rarity to levitate it away and into the TV slot with a malicious grin. “WHY?!” “You made me suffer through the last battle, I feel it's only fitting that I return the favor.” The music started up again as Sonata, Pinkie, Rainbow Dash, Spike, and surprisingly Starlight started to sing. Rainbow: In another dimension, another time and space, Sonata: A parallel universe was fallin' on its face! Spike: When out of the chaos, who else could it be? Starlight: But the animal adventurers from S.P.A.C.E.! Sonata and Pinkie: Bucky! Captain Bucky O'Hare! Mutants and aliens and toads beware! Rainbow: You're looking for adventure? Well, this is it, with Jenny, Deadeye, Blinky, and Willy DuWitt! Spike: I said Bucky! Captain Bucky O'Hare! Pinkie (in a business suit): “And now, an update on Bucky O'Hare and the Toad Wars!” Sonata and Rainbow: In the battle of the aniverse, you don't know what's next! You only know amphibians have made it KOMPLEX! Starlight and Spike: When you check out your scanner and the evil that it bodes, There's only one course of action: Everyone: Let's croak us some toads! Sonata and Pinkie: Bucky! Captain Bucky O'Hare! He goes where no ordinary rabbit would dare! Rainbow: If your Righteous Indignation has suffered a hit, And your photon accelerator's broken a bit, Starlight: And you're losing your mind, and you're having a fit, Get the funky fresh rabbit who can take care of it! Spike and Sonata: Bucky! Captain Bucky O'Hare! You say Bucky? I said Bucky! Bucky O'Hare! Everyone: Let's croak us some toads! Aria’s eye began to twitch as Adagio sighed and said, “Can we go already?” To everyone’s shock, a portal opened up near the former sirens causing everyone to jump. Adagio, not looking a gift horse in the mouth, quickly pulled Aria towards the portal and said, “C’mon Sonata, our rides here.” “Aw, do we have to?” Sonata asked sadly. “Yes Sonata, now say goodbye so we can get home,” Adagio said, pushing Aria through the portal. “Alright. Bye everyone. Hope we can do this again,” Sonata said while walking into the portal with her stuff. As she disappeared from sight, Adagio looked at the ponies and dragon as she said, “Goodbye and we’ll most likely be back.” She started to walk into the portal as she loudly muttered, “Now for my plans.” Once the sirens were gone the portal closed up with a popping noise almost like the sound of a pop bubble. Twilight confused by that just turned to her friends and asked, “Same time tomorrow?” “Eeyup,” everyone said as they started to either leave and go home or go to their rooms. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~( later at fluttershy’s house.)~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ The shy Pegasus returned to see Angel Bunny sulking next to his bed, which Pichu was now sleeping in. His charred black fur a clear indication of how many times he'd tried to make him move by force. “Now Angel Bunny, I told you need to share.” Fluttershy scolded the spoiled rabbit before pulling out a small box. "But I have some good news, there was a small box that I got after the battle and it has your name on it!” The rabbit’s face immediately lit up with joy as he lept towards the box, but the moment it was open and he immediately backed away in fear, however his owner didn't notice. "It looks adorable! Let's hurry up and put it on you!” She squealed as she grabbed him and hastily stuffed him into the outfit. As Pichu woke up from his nap, the first thing he saw was what this wild rabbit had been forced to wear: Angel Bunny was wearing a small red space uniform with yellow boots, gloves and belt, marking him look like a miniature Bucky O’hare. Pichu stared at him for a full five seconds before he burst out laughing. (Meanwhile in the human world) Sunset let out a sigh as she walked home from the shooting range. After watching that strange show, she decided to fish out her old rifle from her closet. Once she got the weapon cleaned up, she started to go to the shooting range every so often to practice. Now all Sunset wanted to do was to lay on her bed and sleep. Opening the door to her apartment, Sunset said, “Home sweet home.” She was just about to prop her rifle against the wall when she noticed the light on in the living room from the hallway. “I’m sure I turned that off this morning,” Sunset said, holding the rifle in her hands as she walked to the living room slowly. Nearing the corner, Sunset took a moment to prepare herself before taking rounding that corner. The moment Sunset entered the living room, she wasn’t prepared for what she saw. There lying on the couch was none other than Adagio Dazzle, former siren and leader of the Dazzlings. While Sunset was used to seeing the puffy haired girl wasn’t anything new, the outfit she had on was certainly an eye catcher. Adagio wore a purple outfit that consisted of legging, long gloves, a strange armor on the left arm and a bikini top. The former siren stretched causing her breasts to jiggle as Sunset almost dropped her gun. Looking at the stunned girl, Adagio smiled coyly and said, “I know there’s probably a million questions going through your head right but the one thing you should be wondering is….” Adagio rose to the point where she was in a sitting position with her legs spread apart slightly. Looking at the gaping girl, Adagio gave her a saucy smile with half lidded eyes as she said, “What should I be doing next?” Sunset just stared at the girl in silence for a few moments, trying to understand the whole situation. She slowly lowers the gun and says, “I really need a fucking smoke.” Let’s just say cursing was the other thing that Sunset picked up from watching the show. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ CHAPTER END! NEXT TIME, TERMINATOR VS ROBOCOP! Iron Man VS Lex Luthor. (Flash Notion version)Trepp turned another page of the Douglas Adams novel, trying to ignore what was happening a parsec over. Finally though, he could stand it no longer. He dog-eared his page and slammed the book down on a table of his own making. “Would you two keep it down!” Harmony looked up and frowned. “What's the problem?” “I'm trying to understand the secret of life, the universe, and everything, and I can't concentrate over-” “SOMEBODY FUCKING HELP ME!” Deadman shrieked. “-Over that.” Trepp raised his equivalent of an eyebrow. “I suppose I have to ask if he's all right.” Harmony had Deadman strung up between celestial bodies; his head and arms were chained to a couple of quasars while black holes pulled at his feet. A snap of her fingers conjured an acid vat a couple light-years across above him. “He's fine,” she said flippantly. “I AM NOT FINE YOU BITCH!” Trepp shrugged. “Okay then. Just put a sock in him or something.” He picked up his book and leaned back again. “HA! THERE ISN”T A MUZZLE THICK ENOUGH TO-” Harmony waved her hand, and an asteroid lodged itself in Deadman's open mouth. “Mrrmph!” he tried to yell. “Hmm-hrungh!” “Hey everypony, what's up!” The cheerful voice made all of the gods wince. “Oh, yes, this is exactly what this day needed,” Trepp muttered as he turned another page. “Hey, Deadman! Hey Harmony!” Another, smaller being popped into the ethereal plane. He looked distinctly pony-ish, with purple fur and golden mane and tail. He had a short muzzle, large eyes, and a unicorn horn. He even had hooves. He also had arms with hands, and he stood upright. He wore a full business suit, but it didn't fit him well. The pant legs were far too long, and he was lost inside the huge jacket. “Forgetting someone, aren't you boy?” Alpha reminded him. “Oh! Of course not; hello Alpha, sir!” he saluted. “Flash Notion,” Harmony mused. “Shouldn't you be off torturing an alicorn princess?” Flash pouted. “Probably. But I was more interested in what you guys were doing. There's been a lot of noise over here lately.” Deadman tried to scream again, but it came out as a choking cough. “Ignore him,” Harmony advised. “Not a problem.” Flash was more than happy to ignore the plight of Deadman. It was what the elder god had taught him, in fact. “So what's going on- aside from the obvious?” Trepp felt a tingle, and looked up to see all the gods- even Deadman, who was starting to develop a hole in his stomach from the acid- looking at him. “What?” “Isn't it obvious?” Alpha unsheathed his gigantic sword. And started polishing it. “Tell the kid.” “Why me?” “Because your friend,” Harmony ground her teeth, “Is the one responsible for all this. And you're responsible for him.” “I never agreed to that,” Trepp muttered. “Fine!” He held up his hands before the others could protest. He leaned down to speak with Flash more at the young god's level. “Deadman got the bright idea to send the ponies a gift- a television and every episode of Death Battle on DVD.” “Death Battle!” Flash's eyes widened with excitement. “I love that show! Can I watch, too?” “Erm-” Trepp hesitated. “Let 'im,” Alpha declared. “Might do him some good, see why he should be helping people instead of making their lives miserable, the way you two do.” “Hey, I help,” Trepp protested. “I add that little bit of spice that keeps them from getting bored out of their minds. The way I am.” “Mrrrrmph!” Deadman shouted. He seemed to be agreeing with Trepp, though it was hard to tell. “Whatever. The kid can stay.” Trepp gave Harmony a pleading look. She simply rolled her eyes. “He might as well. Deadman's going to be busy a while, and none of us are going to do his usual schtick.” Flash floated up through the void towards Trepp. “What is she they talking about?” “She's talking about the box,” Trepp muttered. “Every time the ponies watch a battle, they receive presents from Deadman via a box he placed in the world. Occasionally, we have to clarify certain aspects of the characters for them as well. So we toss notes through. Things like that; but since Deadman is otherwise occupied...” “I'd love to do it!” Flash bounced up and down, even though he was floating. “What battle are they watching next?” Trepp cast a bored glance down at Equestria. “Iron Man versus Lex Luthor. Flash gasped. “Ohmigosh! I love that battle! Oh, thank you thank you thank you!” He bounced around space for a moment, then remembered who all was watching. “Oh, um-” He straightened his suit as best as he could. “Thank you, Alpha,” he said politely. “Thank you, Harmony, Trepp.” They all nodded. “Right!” Flash rubbed his hands together, and a slightly mad gleam entered his eyes. “Let's get started!” ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~In ponyville~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Pinkie was polishing the muscles on her life-size statue of Kratos, while wearing her fake mustache and glancing at the picture of her with White Bomberman and Michelangelo. “Continuity!” Flash yelled. Pinkie set down her polishing cloth with a frown. “Something feels... different today,” she mused. Quite suddenly and conveniently, she was distracted by a glowing vibration on her haunches. “Huh! My cutie mark!” The triplicate of balloons floated out the window, and Pinkie started to follow. She hesitated at the last moment, then took off the mustache. “I should leave that here,” she decided. Then she hopped out the top floor of Sugarcube Corner. Five minutes later Pinkie burst into the Castle of Friendship. “Twilight! My cutie mark-” She stopped when she saw that all of her friends were there, too. “Oooo-oooh. Did you girls get called, too?” “Indeed,” Rarity said with a sniff. “And I was just about to finish up the stitching on my latest project- I'm a bit behind, I'll admit.” “No way- you?” Rainbow couldn't help but laugh. “Lemme guess- you're still trying to find a way to make Deadpool's outfit fit your standards?” Rarity thought of the pile of red and black fabric she had burned yesterday. “I've given up on that, actually. He'll simply have to remain hideous forever.” “Screw you!” The group winced at the familiar voice. “But I'll have to check my schedule first, we all know I'm quite busy with the ladies. Let's see... my penis has an opening next Thursday?” Rarity gagged and fanned herself. “How... uncouth.” “Awww, you know you love me. Mmm-wah!” She actually felt the air kiss somehow. “Hey!” Pinkie glared at the air in front of Rarity. “You're not supposed to show up again until Season Four! We're still on Season Two! Get lost.” “It's actually the end of Season Three that I come back, and it will be awesome. You're supposed to be a party planner, not a party pooper,” Deadpool's disembodied voice muttered. “Whatever. See ya around, Pinkster!” It faded out on the last word. “Well that was... different,” Twilight observed. “In any case, yes, we've all been summoned by the map.” She rested a hoof on the glowing crystal. “Strange though. Our cutie marks are all hovering... here.” Fluttershy frowned at the map. “You don't suppose there's a friendship problem with us, do you?” “That's ridiculous,” Applejack chuckled. “Why, we ain't had any problems in ages! I certainly ain't holdin' nothin' against anypony.” “That's right!” A new voice emanated from the map. “Oh, for Celestia's sake,” Twilight muttered. It was getting hard to keep track of all the different disembodied voices they'd encountered. “There's no friendship problem,” the voice announced. The holograms on the map swirled until they formed into a six-foot tall humanoid pony creature wearing an over-sized business suit. Flash Notion stepped down and smiled at them. “I simply needed you all to get here, and this was the fastest way I could think of.” Twilight glared at him. “So you used our map- one of the most powerful tools of harmony in the universe, as a pager?” Flash shrugged. “Truly sorry about that. But it will all be worth it, I promise you. My name is Flash Notion, and I'm a friend of Deadman's.” “NO HE ISN'T!” The voice of the chaos god echoed through the chamber. “Fine!” Flash rolled his eyes. “But I do know him. And I'm filling in for him this week!” “Does that mean what I think it means?” Rainbow asked, excited. “Yep!” Flash snapped his fingers, and suddenly all the ponies were in Twilight's living room. “It's time for a Death Battle!” “Um... couldn't you have just done that to get us here?” Fluttershy asked. Flash waved her question aside. “You're in for a real treat today. My personal favorite battle. Here's some snacks-” He snapped his fingers, and a buffet of popcorn, ice cream, and cakes appeared. Pinkie's tongue fell out of her mouth. “Some mood lighting-” Another snap, and the curtains drew over the windows; in the room, strips of LEDs along the floor glowed first green, then red and gold, then green again, and so on. “And finally, some comfort.” Flash gave a final snap, and the ponies were joined by their favorite Death Battle-based possessions. Fluttershy clutched her Doomie close to her chest and sighed. “Yay,” she smiled. Pinkie stroked her mustache. “So that's why I left that at home...” Rarity admired the way she looked in her Zelda dress; it was accessorized perfectly with Cloud's ribbon. Twilight smiled at the webshooter on her foreleg. “Ooh, I almost forgot about this. Note to self: try out that duplication spell later.” Rainbow set down the autographed picture of herself and Sonic. She then positioned herself between it and her friends, though they had all seen it. Only Applejack was left without a significant piece of loot. She looked around and raised an eyebrow. “Ah don't want to sound selfish, but where's mah stuff? Ah know ah brought home plenty from that there box.” Flash looked just as surprised. “Hmm. I suppose you simply haven't yet taken home anything of true personal value. Not like Rainbow with her interspecies romance, or Fluttershy with her stuffed guardian.” “Ah guess,” Applejack looked downcast. “Cheer up,” Flash assured her. “I imagine it's simply a matter of time.” He glanced at his bare wrist. “Speaking of, it's time to start the battle. Happy watching!” Flash faded out of sight as the familiar drums and guitar came through the television speakers. The ponies perked up at seeing the words, DEATH BATTLE. “Technology,” Wiz lectured. “It improves our lives, lets you watch cool shows on the internet- and sometimes, it can help you to rival gods.” The ponies collectively oohed and awed as they watched the metal-suited humans move onscreen. “Spike will not be happy with me,” Twilight predicted, levitating a notebook and quill. “Like with Iron Man, the Armored Avenger,” Boomstick proclaimed. “And Lex Luthor, arch-nemesis of Superman.” “WHAT!” They all shouted. “No way,” Rainbow declared. “Superman's arch-nemesis is a guy in a suit? That is soooo lame!” “I dunno, sugarcube.” Applejack scratched at her chin. “Seems like if an Earth Pony got all suited up and fought Princess Celestia. You'd have to admire 'em, no matter how bad they were.” “He does seem awfully brave,” Fluttershy put out. “Shh!” Twilight hushed them. “I don't want to miss any details.” “-S our job to analyze their weapons, armor, and skills to find out who would win a Death Battle,” Wiz was just finishing up. As he did, the screen showed the usual fight preview. “Whoo! Three dimensions!” Pinkie cheered. “My word,” Rarity pointed. “Is that a Gundam?” “Huh.” The others nodded. “Weird.” The logo slammed shut, indicating it was time for the first combatant's run-through. Instantly, hard guitar riffs ripped through the air. Rainbow Dash headbanged righteously. “Aw yeah!” she cried. “This guy's gonna be cool.” “There are the talented,” Wiz said. “There are the prodigies...” Onscreen, armor plating unfolded over a muscle-bound man. “And then, there's Anthony Edward Stark.” The man, sporting a rather awesome beard and mustache, donned the helmet of his suit. “Please,” Boomstick jumped in. “He prefers Tony.” “Howard and Maria Stark ruled a nine billion dollar military tech empire. They could have anything they ever wanted... Except a child.” “Oh, that would just be awful,” Fluttershy sniffed. “I mean, to want a foal, but never be able to have one? Can you think of anything sadder?” “Then Howard met- an ALIEN who decided to build a baby for them!” Boomstick sounded incredulous. “WHAT!” Pinkie agreed. “Fearing humanity would perish to more advanced alien races, this child was genetically engineered to lead the world to a new tech age- buuuuut that was Arno Stark. We don't speak of him.” Wiz quickly moved on. “When Howard and Maria were dissapointed with what they created, they adopted Tony instead.” “Yep,” Boomstick was amused. “That's the 'secret origin' of Tony Stark. Didn't see that comin', did ya?” The ponies couldn't help but laughing at the comic page. The dull look on Tony's face perfectly summed up their own feelings about his origin story. “Despite not being the alien-engineered child of prodigy, Tony's gifted intelligence and world-changing destiny were obvious at an early age.” Twilight listened to Wiz with one ear while writing down everything onscreen. These battles sure were educational! Real name: Anthony Edward Stark Aliases: Armored Avenger, Shellhead, Master of Machines Height: 6'1'' | 185 cm Weight: 225 lbs | 102 kg Estimated net worth: $9.3 billion Owner of Area 51 Claims to have beaten Mr. Fantastic in chess twice ”He graduated from MIT with top honors- and a physics and engineering double major- when he was just 19 years old.” Twilight whistled as Wiz wrapped up Tony's education. Having been to a human world, she understood just how impressive the feat was. Sure, there were humans who graduated faster, but they didn't usually have double majors and achieve the highest possible position in their class. “But since this is a superhero origin, it wasn't long before tragedy struck.” In spite of how insensitive Boomstick was, Rainbow couldn't help but gloat over her accuracy. “See! It's like I said: the hero's parents always die. It's ridiculous.” “We don't know that they're dead,” Rarity tried to say. At the same time, Boomstick continued: “And by 'struck', I mean a car crash, and by 'tragedy' I mean his parents... so all of a sudden, Tony was an orphan.” “Dammit, Boomstick!” "But on the bright side, it also made him the sole heir of Stark Industries. Nice.” “Ah'm pretty sure a mountain o' bits ain't gonna make up fer dead parents,” Applejack grunted. The others exchanged meaningful glances. “What?” she asked. “Oh, nothing,” Twilight motioned for them all to turn back to the TV. “With the entire family fortune at his fingertips, Tony pursued a life of reckless indulgence and mechanical tinkering.” “Oh my,” Rarity blushed at the sight of Tony and a woman passionately kissing. Twilight glanced up and saw him taking apart an engine, and she blushed as well. “War was his income,” Wiz continued, “And he enjoyed every bit of it- until the day his eyes were opened.” “Yeah, opened with a shrapnel-filled irony bomb!” They winced when they saw the missile bearing Tony's name land right beside him. “Move!” Rainbow yelled. The bomb exploded just as Tony got to his feet, and he collapsed against the sand, blood oozing out of his chest. “Too late,” Fluttershy winced, holding up her Doomie. “Held captive by terrorists in Afghanistan, Tony learned the bomb left shrapnel in his heart; which would kill him in a week,” Wiz explained. Twilight winced in sympathy, remembering how many times her own projects had blown up in her face. Rarity also winced, but at the terrible grammar of the comic book. “Really, now,” she muttered. “What were those writers thinking?” “That's RACIST!” Pinkie yelled, almost incoherently. “I thought that was a dead meme?” Flash's voice was heard in the Pink Party Pony's Head. “Eh- not yet.” replied Pinkie. Wiz continued: “The terrorists gave Tony an ultimatum: construct weapons for them and receive treatment... or be left to die.” “But being Tony Stark, he chose door number three.” Twilight felt a chill run down her spine as she watched Tony hammering at a piece of metal. She sensed that what happened today would be vital to her work, somehow. And... something else, too. “He built a space age pacemaker to save his own life. And then built a mech-suit around it and murdered his way to freedom!” Boomstick laughed. “This taught Stark one of life's most important lessons: heroes aren't born.” Tony slammed the metal mask down on a table, and Twilight felt the same chill. “They're built. A lesson which also made for a pretty sweet tag-line.” “Wow!” Rainbow gaped at the alicorn princess. “Twilight?” Twilight looked around, not understanding. “What? What's wrong?” Rainbow giggled, then burst out laughing. “Ha ha- I should've known! Super-genius and super-awesome! He's just your type.” “Huh?” “Er- darling?” Rarity pointed, seeming quite embarrassed. Her cheeks were as red as Twilight had ever seen.Twilight followed Rarity's hoof to her own body. To her wings, which were pointed straight up at the ceiling. “Oh. Wait- no!” Twilight protested. “No way- it was the suit, that's all! Look, it's amazing!” She pointed at the screen, which showed Tony walk out of a cave encased in a heavy-looking sheath of armor. “My turn,” he hissed, and then cut loose with a pair of flamethrowers, blowing the entire terrorist compound to smithereens. Out of the fireball flew the man in the suit, seeming to ride the explosion; heavy guitar riffs accompanied his daring escape. “That was pretty cool,” Rainbow admitted. “But I don't buy it.” “You two do have a lot in common,” Rarity needled. Twilight turned red as a cherry tomato. “Whatever,” she muttered. “Let's just watch the episode, please?” “But Tony's heart was changed in more ways than one that day. Upon returning to America, he nullified all weapons development at Stark Industries, and dedicated his life to saving the world.” Wiz paused. “In his own way.” “Yeah, we're not talking, like, just donating to charity, and being kind to your neighbor- Tony became a one-man army of justice. And began creating a new and improved armored suit that the public would eventually dub... Iron Man." The girls clapped appreciatively. Twilight realized she was staring just a bit too hard as Tony hammered away at his giant anvil. Shirtless. She shook her head and tried to pay attention to what Boomstick was saying. “And then he made another one. And another one. And another... another... and then he made like a shitload more!” “What the- how many of them suits could he need?” Applejack wondered. “The Iron Man suits are numerous,” Wiz answered, “But they typically come with a common base-set of tools.” Another list came onscreen, and Twilight quickly began jotting it down. “Generally composed of a gold-titanium alloy, his standard suits have the strength to lift up to 100 tons; fly at supersonic speeds; and come with an on-board intelligence system called JARVIS- which controls his weaponry, and can summon other suits at his beck and call.” Composed of a gold-titanium alloy Adds 5 inches to Tony's height, yet only weighs 25 lbs Capable of high-speed flight, super strength, and enhanced durability Standard Weaponry Repulsor Rays Smart Missiles Anti-tank Missiles Unibeam “Unibeam?” Rainbow read. “What's that?” “I'm sure they'll explain if it's important,” Twilight assessed. Pinkie giggled. “You'll like it...” she sang. “And for good measure, these babies come loaded head-to-toe with weaponry. I'm talkin' shoulder mounted darts, anti-tank missiles, an EMP, and the Iron Man staple: Laser beams!” Boomstick cheerfully listed. He sounded like a filly in a candy store. “I don't think those are lasers,” Twilight pointed out. “A laser is composed of photons, light particles. I doubt one could be powerful enough destroy asteroids.” “But what about when you do magic?” Pinkie pointed out. “That's magic, that's different. The beams are caused by the energies interacting with the particles in the air. Like a neon sign.” “Ooooh. That's neat!” “So what are those- those weapons?” Fluttershy asked. She swallowed, not liking talking about this part. “These 'repulsor blasts',” Wiz explained, “Draw power directly from the reactor in Tony's chest- or chest piece, depending on the time period- to fire high-mass, negatively charged muons as a concussive energy attack.” “Well holy crap,” Twilight's eyes widened. “What?” “They actually have a semi-plausible scientific explanation for something!” She flipped back through her notepad. “Has this ever happened before?” The other ponies laughed and went back to watching the show. “Most commonly, these are fired from the palms of his suit,” Wiz finished. “But if the situation calls for a bit more firepower, he can blast an even larger beam directly from his chest piece. UNI-BEAM!” Iron Man crossed his arms over his chest, then ripped them apart, pushing out a beam of power wider than his whole body. “Whoa.” Rainbow's jaw dropped a couple inches, along with the rest of her body as she forgot to flap. “That was... that was...” “Super-duper-omega-awesomely cool?” Pinkie asked. Rainbow paused. “What you said.” “All these features come standard in his most often used suit, Model 13: The Modular Armor.” “This armor specializes in adaptability, allowing Tony to swap out it's individual pieces for ones suited to the mission at hand. Oh, and it also has an extra casing known as Iron Man Armor Model 14. But you can just call it...Hulkbuster.” The music dropped and the ponies gasped as they saw the enormous secondary armor, which seemed to ooze power. Wiz seemed just as impressed. “As the name implies, this upgrade was built to contend with one of the universe's strongest beings. With the combination of magnetic and hydraulic technology- in addition to the strength of the modular armor- the Hulkbuster can deliver far more powerful punches and hold its ground against The Incredible Hulk. Who is strong enough to lift a 150 billion ton mountain.” Fear crept into the hearts of the six little ponies as they stared at the green giant, who was nearly as big as the armor Tony had built. They watched as it held up under the advanced assault and shuddered. “Land's sakes,” Applejack murmured. “Could y'all imagine somethin' like that getting' loose in Equestria? Ain't no pony strong enough to stand against that.” “Maybe the Elements of Harmony could stop it?” Fluttershy suggested. “Or our Rainbow Power?” Rarity put in. “I'm not sure,” Twilight admitted. “Actually, there's a lot of characters in this show that I'm not sure we could beat.” “D'you think this Hulk feller will ever be on the show?” Boomstick's voice drew them back to the program. “But his most advanced armor yet comes in the form of his Endo-Sym armor. Part metal, part... scary space-alien-parasite, Tony can summon it telepathically; use it to imprison his foes; and even suck up electromagnetic fields. Mmm...electricity. Wiz took over again. “It can take hits from Storm's lighting, and shoot repulsor beams so powerful, they can injure meta-humans who are normally able to absorb energy.” “Although Tony is a mere man who finds himself fighting with and against unimaginably powerful beings, he has proven time and time again that technology can compete with the world's greatest superheroes.” “He can survive blows from Thor's hammer, hold his own against Captain America, and move faster than a an Extremis-enhanced superhuman's eye can track.” Twilight absorbed this information even as she wrote down the third list. Downed She-Hulk with one punch Can hold his own against Captain America in hand-to-hand Can achieve warp speed flight Tanks hits from Mjolnir Strong enough to bend metal girders with his suit's hands Lifts up cars with one hand First human to possess the reality-warping Infinity Gauntlet “ Wait,” she realized, “He can stand up to Thor's hammer? The only other thing we've seen that can do that is Captain America's shield!” “And he can fight Captain America!” Applejack pointed out. “Whoo-doggy, I wonder how'd he'd do against that Batman feller.” “Not to mention,” Boomstick decided to add, “His suit can actually learn and predict its opponents' next move. And withstand the fury of several nuclear bombs! Do not underestimate the Golden Avenger.” “That being said,” Wiz pointed out, “For all their power, the Iron Man suits are hardly flawless.” The ponies chuckled as they saw one of the suits bouncing off the walls and ceiling, unable to fly straight. “They've been know to malfunction in... life threatening ways,” Boomstick said, and they stopped laughing. “And consume too much power too quickly, leaving Tony helpless.” Twilight winced. “That could prove unfortunate in the middle of a battle, like this one.” “Tony frequently pushes his suit and his body to their absolute limits... and past them. And his reckless, head-first mentality is responsible for landing him in trouble just as much as it is for getting him out of it. This has led to him setting off a civil war between superheroes, and pissing off the all-powerful Phoenix Force into killing Charles Xavier.” “What? Charles? But he's the Iron Man,” Boomstick whined. Wiz wasn't finished. “And he once built a device capable of releasing twenty thousand megatons of atomic energy. That's three times more than all of the Earth's known nuclear weapons combined,” he added. Twilight heard this and paled. “And then he just blasted it straight into the ground!” Boomstick cheered. “All because he wanted to see what was at the Earth's core.” “I'm certain there's a better way to do that,” Rarity winced. “Though I'm also certain you would do the same, Boomstick,” she muttered. “It... didn't work out,” Wiz clarified. “But Tony's most diabolical nemesis isn't the Mandarin, or even Ultron. It's his lifelong battle with alcoholism.” “Say what now,” Applejack said flatly. “What's wrong with downin' a glass o' cider once in a while?” “Absolutely nothing!” Pinkie agreed. Rainbow nodded. “Girls!” Rarity interjected. “This is a serious issue- a glass of cider is one thing. But imagine never being able to put the glass down. Imagine how it would effect your family, your loved ones!” “You speakin' from experience, Rare?” asked Applejack while patting Rarity's back. The unicorn sniffed. “I'd... rather not talk about it any more.” There came the sound of a can pop-top from the speakers. “Did you say something?” Boomstick asked. “Oh, that is it!” Rarity shrieked. “You no-good, low-down, dirty-” She launched into a tirade of curses at Boomstick that made even Applejack flinch, and made all the others glad Spike and the CMC weren't there. Onscreen, Tony faced a tank in his Iron Man Armor. The tank launched a shell at him, but Tony merely twisted out of the way. Then he launched a missile of his own- a relatively small one. It impacted the tank with no noticeable damage, and Tony began to walk away. Then the tank exploded. “I know who I'm voting for!” Rainbow cheered. She couldn't imagine someone more awesome than the Iron Man. “Now hold on sugarcube,” Applejack nudged her. “Let's see the competition, first.” ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ The Death Battle logo slammed shut on Iron Man, then opened on... Superman? The ponies' confusion was not eased by the first few lines of narration. “Superman,” Wiz began, “Is among the most powerful characters in all of fiction. He can destroy planets, withstand supernovas, and fly faster than light itself.” “What kind of person could possibly be the arch-nemesis to someone like him?” They all breathed out, remembering now that this fighter was Superman's enemy. Though they had to agree with Boomstick in his assessment. The redneck continued, “You'd have to be like, a god made of magic Kryptonite-” “WRONG!” Lex screamed in the face of a terrified woman. “Ha!” Pinkie chuckled. “Memes.” “Nope,” Wiz agreed. “Just a mortal man with a passion for business, swindling, and green trench-coats: Lex Luthor.” “G-green?” Rarity didn't even have time to summon her fainting couch before she collapsed. Fluttershy absently patted her friend's shoulder, but kept watching. “Alexander Joseph Luthor began his rise to the top- from the very bottom. As a child he lived in a run down section of Metropolis called the 'Suicide Slum'.” Wiz faltered. “Yes, it was that bad. Under abusive parents it was only by sheer willpower that Lex moved on to a better life.” While the others made sympathetic noises over Lex's unfortunate family situation, Twilight focused on writing down his stats. Full name: Alexander Joseph Luthor Height: 6'2'' | 188 cm Weight: 210 lbs | 95 kg IQ: Immeasurable Twilight frowned at that impossibility, but kept writing. Reason for baldness: classified Former President of the United States Once acted as his own son via brain transplant to a new body Twilight once again considered the possibility of brain-transfers to further her research, and once again dismissed it. She wasn't that desperate. Yet. Boomstick didn't care about Twilight's mental battle or her friends' sympathy for young Lex. “Yeah,” he laughed, “Willpower and some good old fashion Social Darwinism. His parents died in a car crash when their car's brakes failed, leaving Lex alone. Don't feel bad for a second! He used their life insurance money to get out of the ghetto and start his own company. And he's the one who rigged their brakes!” Fluttershy gasped. “He- he killed his own parents?” “That ain't right,” Applejack muttered. She looked unsettled. Wiz sounded it, too. “Though founded through some... legally questionable means, the infamous LexCorp successfully spread it's influence throughout all of Metropolis. In time Lex came to practically run the city itself. Taking ownership of nearly every media outlet, Luthor's positive public image went practically unopposed.” “I bet that's how Nightmare Moon stayed in power in her timeline,” Twilight realized. “But everything changed when the Man of Tomorrow showed up.” “In Lex's eyes, Superman was a massive issue for mankind,” Wiz said, sounding very understanding. “If humans no longer had to solve problems themselves, they would surely become a weaker race, completely dependent upon this otherworldly savior.” “So Lex began his crusade to remove him from the equation.” Even Boomstick couldn't muster up much contempt- until he continued: “And then promptly insert himself as the ruler of humanity.” They all rolled their eyes. Of course Lex wouldn't be an actually decent guy. “Lex is a cunning strategist and mechanical genius, who prefers to place his opponents in un-winnable situations,” Wiz lectured. “However, if physical strength is required, he dons the mighty Warsuit.” They watched as a fully-suited Lex dropped to the ground, ready to fight. “Must I remind you of my superiority?” he asked. “The Warsuit is a powerful battle armor created by Superman's other arch-nemesis, the alien god known as Darkseid. And it's been further enhanced by Luthor's own designs.” “Forged in the fiery pits of Apokolips, Lex's Warsuit is no ordinary piece of machinery.” Applejack gasped and Fluttershy covered her eyes as Lex picked up Wonder Woman by her hair. “Despite it's... less than sleek appearance-” Rarity woke up just long enough to see Lex's junk-pile of a suit and fainted again. Boomstick continued: “It comes equipped with force fields; gauntlet blades; a giant Kryptonite ax; and energy blasts powered by Kryptonite generators.” “A lot of his weapons are powered by Kryptonite,” Twilight noted as she wrote down the suit's capabilities. Culmination of technology from Lex, Darkseid, and Brainiac Superhuman strength & durability Flight Force fields can negate heat vision Flamethrowers Energy blade Energy blasts Includes four different Kryptonite energy-generators in each of the suit's fingers “He is usin' it to fight a Kryptonian,” Applejack pointed out. “Yeah, but that means it doesn't have any special abilities against anyone who isn't a Kryptonian,” Pinkie replied. They all stared at her. “What?” “It can also fly,” Wiz announced, bringing them back to the rundown. “And has enough strength and durability to go up against Superman himself.” “Despite how capable the Warsuit is, you may feel it has an obvious weak spot. The giant hole where his head is! But ol' cue-ball's chrome dome is actually protected by an invisible force field.” They could all picture Boomstick rolling his eyes at the ridiculous idea. “He just wants his opponents to know exactly who's beatin' the shit out of 'em.” Lex turned towards the screen. “Hello, sunshine!” he said, then grinned evilly. Twilight shivered. “Lex's weaponry goes beyond an alien metal suit,” Wiz continued. “In addition to his brilliant strategic mind, he has also surrounded the Earth with dozens of satellites bearing his name.” “Their purpose?” Boomstick asked. “A gigantic game of space laser hot potato!” They watched what appeared to be a scene from a video game in which Lex somehow caught the laser beam, forming it into a ball over his head. Rainbow scoffed. “He totally just ripped off the spirit bomb-thing from Goku,” she said. Lex hurled the energy ball at his opponent, a creepy looking clown, and it caused an explosion that could be seen from orbit. In spite of that, the clown got back up again. This got a chuckle out of the ponies about the unrealistic nature of video games. “Being a genius multi-billionaire, it's no surprise Lex's accomplishments match the expectations.” For a moment, Wiz lost his jaunty tone and actually sounded disturbed. “He's equaled Deathstroke in combat, stabbed Supergirl, snapped Brainiac's neck, and defeated Power Girl in a single stroke.” Rarity came around just as Boomstick said, “You can't blame 'im. I don't think anyone could handle more than a single stroke with Power Girl-” “Oh, for the love of-” “However,” Wiz interjected, much to Rarity's relief, “Lex is not solely dependent on his Warsuit. He sometimes subjects himself to a Kryptonite steroid, which has made him much stronger than an ordinary human. Capable of surviving wounds nobody reasonably should.” The grotesque injection and rippling body-horror made all the ponies flinch. “So not worth it,” Rainbow gagged. “Yeah,” Boomstick said, sounding like he was about to crack up, “Like the time when a giant gorilla shot him in the chest with a sniper rifle, knocking him out of a helicopter, off the edge of a cliff, and landing headfirst in a canyon. He was up and banging his robot chick in like a day! Oh, yeah,” Boomstick backed up, “He built a robot version of Lois Lane for... you know, sex and murder.” “Because Lex always wants what he cannot have,” Wiz explained. “I give up,” Rarity sighed. “All males are pigs!” “Not all of them,” Twilight said gently. Perhaps she could finally tell Rarity about- Pinkie turned her head a full one-eighty to glare at Twilight. “Eep! I mean- there has to be an exception, right?” Rarity sighed. “Please dear, if you find him, let me know.” Wiz continued: “And his know-how with robotics goes past insane and into absurd. While confined to a prison cell, he built a talking, flying robot... that reads Moby Dick at such a high frequency... it carved out an escape route through the floor itself. Including perfectly shaped stairs.” Twilight's eye twitched. “That isn't just absurd, it's physically impossible! At least, with the design they're showing...” She immediately began thinking up a design which could do it. “But most diabolical of all,” Boomstick declared, “When no one was looking Lex Luthor took forty cakes. He took 40 cakes Wiz! That's as many as four tens. And that's terrible.” The ponies couldn't help but laugh at the ridiculous children's book being shown. Especially since Boomstick had quoted it word-for-word. ”Strange thing is, that's... actually... officially... canon,” Wiz sighed out in exasperation. There was even a comic panel to prove it. "oh that Monster!" screamed Pinkie Pie as she could barely able to imagine somepony doing something so EVIL! “Bastard!” Boomstick swore. Then he got back to business. “Luthor's hatred of Superman and drive to win are stronger than any machine he can create. Take- for example- the time Superman threw a satellite at Lexcorp tower, bringing the building down on top of poor ol' Lex. This left the guy with half his face ripped off, all four limbs blasted away, and he was impaled in five different places.” “Oh... my... Celestia,” Twilight whispered. She had never seen injuries so horrific, not even in the previous Death Battles. Usually, the combatants or their victims died, right away. They didn't have to suffer through the pain. Off to the side, Fluttershy actually flew into the bathroom, where the sound of vomiting could be heard. Rainbow glanced around. “I'm... gonna go help Fluttershy,” the pegasus said nervously. Then she was gone, too. Boomstick wasn't finished though. “Even like that, he still refused Superman's help. Wiz, if that ever happens to me, do me a solid and...kill yourself in front of me so my dream of outliving you is complete.” Rarity would've been angry about Boomstick ruining such a potentially heartwarming moment, except for the images of Lex undergoing surgery kept her distracted. It was simply awful to look at. She glanced over, noticed the absence of the pegasi, and saw that Pinkie in particular looked upset. The party pony's mane was beginning to flatten. Rarity eased sideways and placed a hoof around Pinkie's neck. She smiled gratefully. “Never gonna happen,” Wiz informed his friend, before continuing with the narrative. “But it's also that same cocky independence that serves as Lex's greatest downfall. When he merged with the Zone Child-” “Whoa!” Boomstick reeled along with girls. “I-it's not what you think,” Wiz said quickly. “He gained, and I quote, 'infinite power'.” “And a secure spot on somebody's watch list.” “Oh, Boomstick,” Rarity sniffed. “I hate you, so, so much.” “The only catch was, he could not use his power to harm others. But because all he wanted to do was kill Superman, he... tried it anyway.” “So Superman just straight up punched the god out of him,” Boomstick laughed. “Well, that's hardly accurate...” “C'mon. How else would you describe that?” "he has a good point" Said Twilight agreeing with Boomstick. Wiz hesitated. “Fair enough,” he decided. “Even so, when the Earth is threatened, you can count on Lex Luthor to look his enemies in the eye and fight for his people.” Wiz paused. “And then exploit the hell out of them afterward.” Onscreen, Lex walked into a pit and up to a purple- thing. “You know what happens when you take on Lex Luthor?” he asked. He brought up a pistol and emptied the clip into the poor creature. When it was empty, he threw the gun at it and began kicking it mercilessly. “The same thing... that's going to happen... to Superman!” Lex continued to beat and kick the creature, now long past the point of overkill. The ponies were quite thankful when the logo slammed shut. “Alright, the combatants are set. Let's end this debate once and for all!” “But first, we don't want you to have horrible, earth-shattering regret by missing the best party in gaming. So we're gonna tell you about it!” Twilight muted the TV while the advertisement played. “Well,” she said, slightly faint. “That was... something.” “Is it over?” Fluttershy called from the bathroom. “Come on out, girls,” Applejack called. Rainbow and Fluttershy came out slowly. “I um, I'm going to vote for Iron Man,” Fluttershy said. “Yeah,” Rainbow agreed. “Me, too.” Twilight sighed. “Me as well. And not for the reasons you think!” she snapped at Rainbow. “Sure...” the pegasus giggled. “Oh man, finally! I get to tease somepony else for a change!” “Ugh,” Twilight groaned. “Okay, is there anypony who wants to vote for the bad guy? Speak now, or forever hold your peace.” Slowly, hesitantly, Applejack raised a hoof. They all stared at her. “Ah'm sorry, ah'm sorry!” she said. “But ah just gotta. Ah know he's a horrible person, but he's got a point about Superman. Ah mean, it'd be like if Princess Celestia went around solvin' everypony's problems herself, stickin' her muzzle where it don't belong.” “But isn't that what we do?” Fluttershy pointed out. “No!” Applejack shook her head. “We help them solve their own problems. We don't solve the problems for 'em! Why, if Celestia did what Superman did, she'd be one step away from bein' a tyrant bad as Sombra or Chrysalis.” “It's alright, Applejack,” Twilight said. “We might not understand, but we can respect your choice. It's just a show, after all.” “Yeah,” Rainbow nudged her. “It's not like this show will change the fate of Equestria or anything.” ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ with Celestia ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ In her bed chamber in Canterlot, Princess Celestia nuzzled her godly colt-friend. “I've missed you,” she whispered. “Sooth,” he said. “I am most grateful for the contest which hast brought us together again.” “I just wish we could all be together,” Celestia sighed. “We should talk to Sunset.” The stallion shrugged. “In good time. I think thou should perhaps focus on thy kingdom first. Would it not be prudent to take a more active role in affairs?” “I'll take an active role in our affair,” she teased. “Oh ho!” he laughed. “I accept thy challenge. But I was serious,” he motioned towards the window with one hoof. “Thou art a natural leader; thou should be amongst the people of thy land, leading them in glorious interaction with the other nations.” Celestia pinned him down. “We're going to interact first,” she breathed into his ear. “Then we can talk about other nations...” ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ “Okay,” Twilight said back in her castle. “So it's five of us for Iron Man, Applejack for Lex?” They all nodded. “Right then. Let's see how it turns out.” She un-muted the Battle just as it started. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ The warehouse was large, but quite full. Military vehicles and other, stranger things were packed so tight there was barely enough room for the security guards to patrol. That made it easy for a stealthy individual to slip inside. He waited for the guard to walk past, hearing the man's radio squawk. “Colonel Rhodes copies all,” it said. The target was at the center of the building, with an extra guard: a large crate labeled 'Stark Industries'. With only one aisle left to go, his confidence and impatience won out. Lex Luthor stepped behind the first guard and took him out with a taser gun. The second guard heard the noise of the discharge and turned around, bringing his rifle to bear. He got off a few shots, but Lex's personal force field deflected them easily. He took the second guard out as well, and the screen cut to black. They all winced, and a collective “Ooooh” escaped the ponies. The screen faded in on Tony Stark's workshop, where he was working on yet another suit of armor. While also listening to the theme song from one of his many TV series. His hubris did not go unnoticed. “If I had my own theme song, I'd totally listen to it,” Rainbow bragged. “On repeat.” However, Tony wasn't left alone for very long. There was a beep, and a computerized voice spoke. “Sir, we have a visitor,”JARVIS said. The alarm went off a moment later, and the monitors around the workshop displayed Lex's face. Tony stood up, then looked over at a glass case. Inside was a greenish-colored crystal. “Kryptonite?” Pinkie asked. “Dunno,” Twilight admitted. Back in the warehouse, Lex reached his target and got to one knee. “All clear,” he muttered. He opened the case, revealing- “Are those the Dragonballs!” Applejack exclaimed. “How in the hay does Iron Man have the Dragonballs?” Nopony could think of a satisfying answer for that. But Lex ignored the balls, as well as a large key-shaped relic, in favor of a crystal stuffed into the side of the crate. “What a joke,” he laughed, though they weren't sure what he was referring to. Lex stood up, taking the crystal. At that moment Iron Man flew into the warehouse, his entrance accompanied by a long, vibrating guitar. “Hands off, Baldy!” Tony declared. He strutted forward. “What's that you got there?” Lex turned around, crystal in hand. “Oh yeah!” Tony fired off a repulsor blast, obliterating the crystal. “It's mine. I'll send you the bill.” Lex pulled out a remote control, and his Warsuit dropped from... somewhere. As he got into it, JARVIS felt the need to speak up. “Actually, sir,” he said, “I should probably remind you: the contents of this warehouse belong to Miss Potts.” “Pepper?” Tony winced. “I'll forward the estimated damages fee to her account.” “Great. Be discreet about it.” “One of us has to be.” Lex laughed giddily, then launched himself through the air a few feet. He came down opposite Tony in the center of the warehouse. His shield flared to life. “Remember my face, Stark,” he said. “It'll be the last thing you ever see.” FIGHT! The music picked up, and the two armored men launched themselves at one another, meeting in the middle with energy already building around their fists. Lex's energy increased faster, shoving Tony back several meters. “So... Awesome!” Rainbow squeed. The others couldn't help agreeing. Tony fired repulsor blast after repulsor blast, but Lex's shield absorbed them all. He switched tactics and activated the missile packs built into his shoulder blades. The dozens of miniature warheads spiraled outward, turning the floor around Lex into a raging conflagration. But the man himself was unaffected; he blocked any rocket that came near with an energy projection from one arm. Many of the missiles, however, did not come near him. They flew out into the rest of the warehouse and detonated against the stored items. Many cars turned into flaming wrecks. “His system's are confusing my targeting,” JARVIS admitted. “Also, adding two million to your charges.” The ponies laughed at the AI's snark. “Not now, JARVIS,” Tony snapped. “What do we got here?” He flew up and forwards, slamming a fist into Lex's armor. But he simply bounced backward several feet. “I'm having trouble determining the suit's alloy. Alien, perhaps.” Tony tried again, rushing forward at ground level and slamming his fist into the plating between Lex's legs. Twilight winced, recalling a time she accidentally kneed human Flash Sentry in the same spot while they were dancing. But the blow had no effect on Lex. Angry now, Tony began punching Lex's torso repeatedly. All the while, his foe simply stood there and laughed. “My suit... is invincible!” Tony launched himself into the air and brought both repulsors down to Lex's face. “How 'bout this part?” he said. Tony let off both blasts, the explosion filling the area with smoke. “Nope,” Applejack said, “It's just as tough as the rest of 'im!” Before the smoke even cleared, Lex reached out and grabbed Tony's leg. He swung the Iron Man into the ground once, twice. Then he hauled Tony up and crushed the shin of his armor with one hand. “And I thought you were smart,” Lex shook his head. “Hey, you're the one who looks like a giant rusty trash can with legs,” Tony quipped. “No judging!” Lex snarled and smashed Stark into the ground again, then turned and hurled him into the leg of the Gundam robot. Broken conductors in the robot created feedback, and the leg exploded; the rest of the robot collapsed, taking out a row of artifacts. “Sir, I estimate that will be a five hundred and eighty three million dollar fee.” “Whoa whoa!” Tony cut JARVIS off. “That one's on him.” The ponies laughed again, loving the running gag. Fluttershy perked up. “You better win, then,” she said to the TV, “Or good luck getting your money back!” The ponies who hadn't played buckball with her looked sideways in surprise. The music kicked back into high gear as Lex brought out his Kryptonite ax. He rushed forward and slashed through Iron Man's defenses. “Ah ha ha ha!” Lex laughed. He charged up a Kryptonite laser and gave it a wide sweep, obliterating half the remaining warehouse stock. Tony deployed a limited shield, which was all that saved him from being cut in half as well. It didn't keep him from being knocked back, though. He stumbled on his feet, then spotted a possible weapon behind him. “Here we go...” He muttered. “Activate the EMP!” JARVIS dutifully charged it up and unleashed the electromagnetic pulse. Instantly, all the improperly shielded systems in the warehouse shut down or were damaged. Even Lex's suit. “Ug- what!” Lex fell to one knee. “Impossible!” While Lex was distracted, Tony picked up what he'd spotted earlier. “All right,” he laughed. “Come to mama!” Giving it an extra boost with his back thrusters, he tossed it at Lex. “Heave ho!” “Wait a minute,” Rarity said. “Isn't that-” At the same time, Lex regained control over his suit and stood up, just in time to see the black car hurtling towards his face. “Wait, is that the-” That was all he had time to say before he was forced to chop the vehicle in half with his ax. The two halves flew behind him and decimated yet more treasures. “That one might actually put a dent in your wallet,” JARVIS said. “Uh huh!” the ponies agreed. “What are you talking about, it's just a car,” Tony rolled his eyes. JARVIS brought up a price list for all the uniquely themed items that car contained. “Seriously?” Tony was aghast. “What kind of car was that? Where do I get one of those?” “An' why in tarnation did this Miss Potts have it?” Applejack wondered. “I think there are more pressing concerns, AJ,” Twilight pointed out. Though she, too, was curious about how Pepper Potts had come to own the Batmobile. Lex hefted a giant crate over his head, labeled 'Model 14'. “Wake up, sunshine!” he called out, right before he hurled it at Tony. “Watch your left,” JARVIS advised. A split second before the crate plowed into Tony. The crate smashed Tony through the wall of the warehouse and into the street, coming to rest directly on top of him. The music faded out, and Lex flew through the opening. He took his ax out again as he landed. “Thanks for the fun, Stark,” he said. “It was... smashing.” “It ain't over yet, you bowling pin!” Rainbow growled. Sure enough, a large fist punched through the box, and the large form of the Hulkbuster leaped out. It crashed back to the ground, making a crater in the street. “No problem, pal. Thanks for the suit.” The secondary helmet came down, and the background music soared into an electric beat. Iron Man and Lex charged forward once more, but this time Tony struck the first blow. He grabbed the blade of Luthor's ax as it swung towards him, then shattered it. Stunned, Lex tossed the now-useless shaft aside and brought up his fists. The two metal titans traded blows that shook the earth, almost equal. Until Lex charged his fist, and knocked the Hulkbuster back a step. Tony recovered quickly, and plowed forward into Lex. He tackled the other scientist into a building, then activated his jets and pushed them up the side. Brick and concrete slammed into Lex's head, and for a brief moment Lex skipped away from the building. Tony slammed him back down and kept pushing until they reached the top. Tony let Luthor fall a bit, then fired a repulsor directly into his chest. “Whoo!” Rainbow cheered. “Kick his butt!” “Rrr,” Applejack growled. “Come on, you lyin' sack of manure, get up an' fight!” Lex fell through an overpass and plowed a trench through the street. Tony flew down after him. They charged for a third time, and locked arms, energy flying between them. Lex laughed as the energy built up, until it once more knocked Tony back. “That current damaged your battery,” JARVIS warned. “Power is at fifteen percent and dropping fast. I recommend a new plan of attack.” “Uh oh. 'They've been known to consume energy too fast'...” Twilight recalled. Tony shrugged off the advice and the blow. “I have a plan,” he snarled, even as Lex powered his force field back up. “Attack!” Tony ran forward and pounded on Lex's shield, doing nothing. His opponent laughed at the feeble attempts. “Power is at ten percent,” JARVIS announced. “You call that power?” Lex smirked. Tony charged his repulsors and grabbed hold of the shield, but it didn't work. “Ha! You are nothing.” Desperately, Tony asked, “JARVIS, re-route all power to the arm and leg hydraulics!” “Will that be enough?” Fluttershy wondered. She was starting to have a hard time breathing. “There's only six percent power!” Pinkie pointed out. “Six percent!” Tony began a rapid fire beating of Lex's shield, giving it everything. The shield flickered, but remained, the quintessential immovable object. “I have seen true power,” Lex gloated. “You are nothing more than another ant to crush under my-” Tony brought his fists together, charged the repulsors, and slammed them both down onto the shield. To everyone's surprise, it shattered out of existence. “Well how about that,” Lex said dully. Tony drew back for one last punch. “Good night, cue-ball!” The music suddenly faltered as Lex caught the Hulkbuster's fist. “What's happening?” Tony cried. “We're out of power,”JARVIS reported. “Aw, figures,” Tony moaned. His suit began to collapse towards the sidewalk, literally kneeling before Lex. “Fool,” Lex shook his head. “You're just like all the rest.” He opened a touch-screen on his suit's arm and tapped away. “Building a suit to save the world... Trying to play God...” Target Locked, the screen read. High above the battle, a small satellite orbiting the Earth rotated. Red energy built up, until it lanced downward. Lex raised his arms and used the energy manipulators within his suit's hands to capture the laser. The energy balled up, and drew Lex into the sky as well. Rubble floated up in a halo of destruction, even as the music swelled. “LET ME TELL YOU SOMETHING STARK!” Lex roared. “THERE'S ONLY ONE MAN IN THE WORLD FIT TO PLAY SUCH A ROLE!” He grunted as he hurled the massive energy ball at the Hulkbuster; it transformed into a sky-high column of fire that obliterated most of the street. What was left of the armor, Tony inside, was launched into a building several blocks down, which shattered and collapsed on top of him. Lex gently landed on the road, looking smug. “Me,” he finished among the silence. Everypony stared at the television in awe. For just a moment, they believed it was over, and Lex had won. Then the music restarted. Drums and stringed instruments rose up, even as streams of metal danced through the air around Lex. He looked around, confused, and the metal flew into the pile of rubble down the street. Chills ran up and down the backs of all six ponies. Under the rubble, a new suit was forming. A single repulsor cleared away all of the debris that had been on top of it, even the remains of the Hulkbuster. “I dunno, Lex,” Tony said. His voice was quiet, but confident. And angry. “Being a god can't be too hard, I mean- I'm the most intelligent-capable person on the planet.” Tony strutted forward, fully encased inside his Endo-Sym Armor. The silver suit gleamed under the sun, and radiated power. Glowing blue lines flowed over its surface. “I'm not playing god,” Tony grinned. “All this time-” He crouched down, and the lines in his suit shifted from blue to red. “I've been playing human.” The suit powered up with a rumble that shook the ground, even as the music transformed into a pure one-woman wail. Tony launched himself forward faster than Lex could react. He smashed into the arm guard, which splintered, and Lex was sent flying. Tony flew after him, reaching the apex before Lex did, and knocked him twice more. Lex fired off a ball of Kryptonite energy, which slammed directly into Tony. But Tony wasn't affected in the slightest. He flew forward; Luthor desperately unleashed his flamethrowers, but Tony danced around the fire until he was right in front of his opponent. “I'll take this!” He grabbed the arm's of Lex's suit. There was a quick whining energy buildup, and then Lex's suit seemed to collapse. He was knocked backward in the air, still hovering, but he could not move. “Wha- what... did you take?” Lex demanded. Tony held up one hand, and green Kryptonite energy danced along it. “Everything,” he hissed. In a single blow, he cleaved apart the top half of the Warsuit and pulled Lex out. The devastated machine fell to the ground far below. Tony wasn't finished- he turned and hurled Lex himself toward the ground, smashing him through another overpass first. Lex bounced down the road, but Tony was there in an instant. He tossed Lex back into the air, then jumped after him. “Here's the big one!” Tony crossed his arms over his chest, then arched his back and unleashed the unibeam. All of Lex's power was turned back against him, and the man fell apart under the assault. Literally. His body disintegrated at a sub-cellular level. Unfortunately, the energy beam didn't stop at Luthor's body. Tony dropped back to the ground and his armor changed from red to blue, and he stared at what was left of a building. He winced. “That... was Pepper's building, wasn't it?” With horrible timing, a ringtone chimed in his suit. “Phone call from Miss Potts,” JARVIS announced. “Uh- tell her... I'm not here. I'm, uh... jogging!” “Already answered, sir.” “Tony?” a curious female voice filtered through the speaker. “Uh, hi, Pepper. How are you?” She got straight to business. “Why did JARVIS just deposit five billion dollars for-” Tony jumped as a piece of the Gundam fell to the ground behind him. “-Collateral damage?” “I'm- not here,” Tony said unconvincingly. He launched himself into the air and flew away. “I'm jogging.” KO! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ For a moment, they simply sat and stared at the screen. Then six ponies started cheering so loudly, it was heard all over Ponyville. “That. Was. AWESOME!” Rainbow shouted. “You're tellin' me!” Applejack didn't even care that she'd lost. Seeing what she'd just seen was worth it. “Ah've never seen anythin' could top that in my whole entire life. An' that's the truth!” “Twilight, your wings-” Rarity tried to say, but the alicorn wasn't listening. “He won, he won!” she sang while bouncing around like a school-filly, wings pointing straight up. “Yay!” Fluttershy said, even as Pinkie Pie shot off a party cannon quartet, which somehow sounded like the music that played when Iron Man first arrived in the warehouse. “Did you see that? First he was all like, sheeeewm! And then he was all like, whooosh! And then-” “He won, he won!” “Yay!” “He won, he won!” “-And the fire! It just exploded-” “Yay!” “He won, he-” “EVERYPONY QUIET!” Rarity shrieked. They all stopped- Pinkie Pie in midair- and looked at her. “Ahem,” she pointed at the television. “It isn't quite over yet...” “Oh, right.” They all sat down, barely containing their giddiness, and watched. “Bullseye!” Boomstick proclaimed, even as Iron Man pulled out a two-dimension cannon bigger than himself, and used it to annihilate what was left of the Warsuit. “Both Tony and Lex possessed incredible pieces of technology, but only one was naturally prepared for anything,” Wiz explained. “Although it's true that Lex could trade blows with Superman in his Warsuit, the only reason he ever lasted as long as he did is because many of its weapons are based on Kryptonite. Great for battling Kryptonians, only... okay against everybody else.” “That's what I was talking about!” Pinkie protested. “Yes, the Warsuit could take hits from Superman, making it more than a match for even the Hulkbuster's power. But even against the very enemy it was designed to kill, the Warsuit only lasts so long.” The took in the comic image, which showed Supe's literally punching Lex out of the Warsuit. “Guess he was the one who was, 'wrong',” Fluttershy said. “Iron Man's greatest advantage was being able to adapt his strategy by remotely summoning and changing suits. The Endo-Sym in particular could counter nearly anything Lex could throw at it.” “Plus Iron Man has far more actual combat experience. Lex treated physical combat as a last resort, beneath him, while Tony straight up enjoys it.” Boomstick paused, and they waited for the inevitable bad joke. “Lex just wasn't suited for this battle.” “The winner is Iron Man.” The ponies cheered for their new hero, even as the logo slammed the episode closed. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ “Next time on Death Battle,” Boomstick intoned. The ponies quieted once more, to see who would fight next. Text appeared onscreen. 'SHUNNED BY SOCIETY', it read. The watched as a man underwent a painful looking transformation, his hands gaining claws, his teeth turning to fangs, his skin sprouting blue fur, and his muscles bulging. He lunged at the ordinary looking humans, who screamed as he roared. 'BEASTS BY NATURE'. Lightning flashed, while a statue cracked apart to reveal a bat-winged humanoid. The ponies flinched, reminded of Discord. This must be a villain, they assumed. Until the next text came up. 'DEFENDERS OF HUMANITY'. A quick montage showed the two beings fighting even worse monsters, saving people, and... doing science? Twilight was intrigued. 'BEAST vs GOLIATH', the screen flashed, with the headings 'X-MEN' and 'GARGOYLES'. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ “That looks pretty cool,” Rainbow said, but she sounded subdued. They all had a hard time imagining a more epic fight than the one they just watched. “Ah'd have to watch 'em back to back, but I dare say that one was even better than the Superman-Goku fight,” Applejack ventured. “I agree!” Flash faded back into existence, causing the ponies to jump. “Aw, what's the matter? Scared of me?” “No!” Rainbow declared. “Y-yes!” Fluttershy whimpered. “That's sweet,” he said. “But I believe it's about this time that you normally get presents?” “Oh yeah!” Rainbow flew down next to the glowing box. As soon as it faded, she opened up the flaps and looked inside. “What'd we get?” Applejack asked. Rainbow dug around inside. “Huh,” she sounded disappointed. “What?” “It's just some comics and action figures,” she said, and pulled them out to demonstrate. “Even less than usual.” Rainbow set the loot on the floor. “Next time we see Deadman, we might want to tell him the box is broke.” “It isn't broke. Those are for Spike! You know, when he finally decides to show up.” Flash smiled. “Wait...” Twilight glanced around and frowned. “Where is Spike?” “I sent him and Starlight on a little trip...” answered Flash. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Meanwhile, in the Crystal Empire...~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ “Back! Back you foul beasts!” Spike mashed the controls of the video game. “Hey, thanks for letting us play, Sunburst.” The stallion shrugged. “It appeared just a minute before you two did. I certainly have no use for it. I'm not even sure how it works!” “I'm really sorry about all this,” Starlight told him. “I have a feeling it's the fault of our mutual friend-” “The princess?” Sunburst asked. “No, Deadman.” Starlight grit her teeth. “I just hope he doesn't strand us in the wilderness again.” “Well, if you're worried, by all means. Stay as long as you like.” “And what about the rest of us?” Rarity asked. Flash scratched at his chin. “I'm getting to it.” “Could you get to it a little faster?” Rainbow crossed her hooves. She wanted her prizes, already. “Psssh,” Flash waved her off. “You're no fun.” He snapped his fingers, and a box immediately appeared in front of each pony. “Go ahead, open 'em.” Fluttershy was the first to peel back the wrapping and reach into her box. Her hoof touched something... odd. “Eep!” She squeaked. Fluttershy dropped the box and shot into the air. Tentatively, a golden pseudopod reached out of the box and settled onto the couch. It formed into a blob about the size of a pony's head. “What is that?” Twilight frowned. “It's an Endo-Sym!” Flash said proudly. “Don't worry- without an AI or the internet, this little guy is hardly smarter than a dog.” “Are we talkin' like mah puppy Winona or like the Diamond Dogs?” “What's the difference?” “Winona's smarter,” Applejack grinned. Fluttershy settled back onto the couch and leaned towards the blob. “Um... hello,” she said. The blob glowed blue, and rubbed its top-most portion against Fluttershy's nose. She giggled. “I think I'll call you... Aurum.” Aurum flashed bright white, then wrapped around Fluttershy's foreleg. It seemed to purr.The others quickly pulled the boxes open. “Sweet!” Rainbow pulled out a small metal pack, which she slung onto her back. It unfolded to cover the front of her wings. Then, the rear section lit up with a repulsor's glow. In an instant, Rainbow was zooming around the castle, without any effort at all. “This- Is- Awesome!” Pinkie hugged her new party cannon; like Rainbow's pack, it glowed with repulsor power. Rarity cooed over a miniature Iron Man robot. It bowed to her, and proceeded to re-tie her ribbons. Twilight looked at a glass box with a glowing circle inside it. Around the circle's edge were the words, 'PROOF THAT TONY STARK HAS A HEART'. Her eyes were about the size of dinner plates, her smile bigger yet. Only Applejack held off. “What's the matter, Applejack?” Flash asked. “Ah don't know,” she murmured. “What if... what if ah don't like it?” Flash laughed. “I picked it out special. If you don't like it, you can use it on me.” "Us it on ya'?” Applejack frowned. Slowly, she removed the top from the box and reached inside. She rummaged around a bit, frowned, then pulled out a metal shaft. She hit a button on the side, and a curved, green blade erupted out. “'S Kryptonite,” she said. “Mmm-hmm.” Flash leaned down closer. “Check out the handle.” She peered at the metal, and saw that there were words carved in it. “To... Applejack...” she read. “'Sometimes even when you're right, you're wrong. Ah hope ya' can find the balance between actin' on the truth and keepin' your principles, the way ah never could. Be better than me. Alexander J. Luthor.'” Applejack looked up at Flash. “Ah bet that's the nicest thing he's ever said to anypony.” “To any pony, yes.” Flash stretched. “But you give him far too little credit. Lex did a lot of good in his life. It's just that the bad ended up outweighing the good. And he knows it. Actually, he's been trying to be better recently. “Really.” “Very recently. After this battle was made.” “Huh. Well, thank ya', Mister Notion. This was fun.” “Yeah. Maybe we can do it again some day! But for now... adios.” Flash turned sideways and disappeared, like a piece of paper. “I've got to go, too,” Fluttershy said. “I need to introduce Aurum to the rest of my animals.” “Yes!” Twilight looked up from her Arc Reactor. “In fact, we should all go. Goodbye!” A bit put off, but used to their friend's strange antics, the ponies exited the Castle of Friendship and returned to their lives, albeit laden with new treasures. Fluttershy flew low over Ponyville. Aurum was wrapped tightly around her hoof, and didn't seem to be coming off if it didn't want to. The golden blob rippled in the wind. Fluttershy was so busy thinking about what was going to happen when she got home, she didn't pay attention to her surroundings. She ended up over the Everfree Forest. She only realized this when she heard the hiss of a monster. Fluttershy halted in the air and looked down at the dark forest. “Oh dear,” she whispered. Slowly, she started drifting backwards. Only to bump into something large, cold, and scaly. Fluttershy turned around and saw four long necks, with reptilian heads attached to each. The hydra stared at her for a moment, then roared. “EEEEEEEEK!” Fluttershy cried. The hydra lunged for her, and she was done for-Clang! Fluttershy opened her eyes and saw a very different view. Partially obstructed by gold, and tinged with blue around the edges. But why hadn't the hydra eaten her? She looked over herself and saw that her body was sheathed in blue-glowing gold. “Rrrrr-um!” she heard. “Oh!” Fluttershy realized. “Aurum! You're an armor-pet.” It hummed. Fluttershy looked up and saw the hydra watching her. One of its heads was nursing broken teeth. “I'm sorry about your teeth,” Fluttershy said, “But you shouldn't eat ponies!” The hydra hissed. “Don't be like that.” She tried using her Stare, but with the armor on, it didn't work. The hydra lunged again. This time, she brought up her hoof and pointed it at the hydra. “Last chance,” Fluttershy said. “Go. Home!” It didn't. Fluttershy concentrated, and a blast of energy exploded from her hoof and splashed against the hydra. It didn't really injure the beast, but it no doubt stung. The hydra yelled and dropped back below the trees. Fluttershy smiled and looked at her hooves. “Yay!” she said softly. “Let's go home, Aurum.” “Rrrrrr-um.” Fluttershy started to flap her wings, then had a thought. She extended her legs out behind her, and concentrated on the energy again. Flares erupted from her hooves, and she rocketed forward, faster than ever before. “YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY!” Flash smiled as he watched Fluttershy speed home. “Well that was fun!” “I'M GLAD YOU ENJOYED IT,” Deadman said. He was still strung up, but the acid was gone and the hole in his false-guts repaired. “BECAUSE YOU'RE NEVER DOING IT AGAIN.” “What? But I thought I did a good job!” “THAT'S JUST IT. YOU DID A GREAT JOB!” Flash was confused. “So then, what's the problem? “THE PROBLEM IS YOU'RE MAKING ME LOOK BAD. JETPACKS AND HELPER ROBOTS? AND I CAN'T TAKE THOSE BACK!” “Oh! I'm sorry,” Flash apologized. “I never meant to screw things up.” He sighed. “But I always do, somehow.” “He's messing with you, kid.” Alpha slapped him on the back, which nearly broke it. “You did fine. And if you ever want to come back, we can have Harmony gag Deadman again.” “I'm going to ask her to do it anyway,” Trepp smirked into his book. Flash smiled. “Well, thanks for the offer. I'll leave it open. But... I'm over this now. I got my own universes to fool around with. Ciao!” He snapped his fingers, and the business suit collapsed. There was nothing inside. “Is he actually gone?” Harmony asked. They waited a moment, and Alpha grunted. “I think so.” “Oh, thank us,” Trepp sighed. “He almost makes me appreciate Deadman.” “THANK YOU!” “I take it back.” “THEN, FUCK YOU! BUT SERIOUSLY,” Deadman chuckled, “LET'S GET BACK TO BUSINESS AS USUAL, OKAY? HEY, FOLKS!” he yelled at the fourth wall, “WHAT'D YOU THINK OF THE NEWBIE? SHOULD WE KEEP HIM? LET HIM GO? RUN HIM OVER WITH A TRUCK? LEAVE IT IN THE COMMENTS!” “Deadman!” Harmony snapped. “Stop breaking the fourth wall so blatantly! You'll wreck the suspension of disbelief.” “NEVER! BESIDES, HAVE YOU READ THE TITLE OF THE STORY? IT REQUIRES SUSPENDING THE SUSPENSION! I WON'T STOP, AND THERE'S NO WAY YOU CAN-” Another asteroid wedged its way down his throat, muffling his voice. “Thank you, Harmony” Trepp said. Harmony shook her head. “It wasn't me.” They both looked over at Alpha, surprised. He said nothing, just kept polishing his sword. And smiling. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ CHAPTER END! SEE YA ALL WHEN I GET GAARA AND TOPH READY!
Akuma VS Shang tsung.(edited)After the girls had collected their desired snacks and were able to convince Pinkie Pie that she didn’t need to grab every sweet that was in the kitchen and just grab a few of her favorite treats so the could make their way back to the ballroom. “So, what do you y’all think will happen in the next episode?” Applejack questioned, as they made their way down the hall. “I don’t really know for sure, but I bet it will have a bad guy in it!” Rainbow Dash claimed, puffing her chest out in pride. “Uh-huh...” muttered the farmer, as she gave her rainbow friend a flat look. “If I could be so bold to ask, but what gives you that idea?” questioned Rarity, with a raised brow. “Was it because of the preview?” Fluttershy asked, meekly. “Yup! Only a bad guy would say, you’re soul is mine!” explained the rainbow speedster, doing a poor imitation of the voice she made. The others nodded, finding her logic sounded. As they continued their way to the ballroom door, but stop when they heard not only Twilight and Spike's voice, but two others as well. Curious, they quickly opened the door and were surprised to see the two rulers of Equestria, Princess Celestia and Princess Luna, sitting with Twilight, and seem to be having a good chat if the small amount of laughter where anything to go by. “Oh! You guys finally made back.” smiled Twilight, as she waved her friends over. “Uh… yeah, we had to keep Pinkie Pie from taking every sweet from the kitchen and all that.” Applejack explained, with a sheepish look, ”Though if we knew the Princesses were coming over, we would’ve hurried up.” she clarified, as she and the rest of the group each picked a seat and sat down. “*chuckle* Do not fret, Applejack, we don’t mind waiting for our friend's.” chuckled Celestia. Celestia was also an Alicorn who has a white coat with a very slight pink tinge, purple eyes, and a flowing violet, azure, green and cyan translucent mane and tail. Her cutie mark was of the sun. “Our sister speak the truth, young Applejack! We shall always wait for our dearest friends as they take their time getting snacks!” proclaimed Princess Luna, proudly. Like her sister and Twilight, she is also an alicorn with a dark blue coat, teal eyes, and like her sister also had a translucent blue mane with a translucent blue border. Her cutie mark was of a crescent moon placed over a black background. “While that’s wonderful to hear Princess, but umm... if it’s ok to ask. Why are you here?” Fluttershy asked nervously, but a warm smile from Celestia help calm her nerves greatly. “It’s no problem, my little pony, and to answer your question, Luna and I wanted to see this show from another world.” the Sun Princess explained, causing most of the group to nod in agreement with her reasoning, but Rainbow Dash raised her hoof, “Yes, Rainbow Dash?” she asked. “Well, it’s cool and all that you two want to watch with us, but don’t you have like, day court and stuff?” questioned the blue mare, causing her friends to agree with that as well. “Don’t worry about that, I have my nephew, Blueblood looking after things for me,” Celestia said. “Now, let us desis with the chatter and watch a battle between two great warriors!” cheered Luna soon followed by everyone else. This was enough prompting for Twilight to start the next episode. PLAY. Interlude (*Cues: Invader - Jim Johnston*) Wiz: Street Fighter, Mortal Kombat. Kings of the fighting genre. And every good fighter needs awesome villains. Boomstick: Like Akuma, the ultimate badass of martial arts. Wiz: And Shang Tsung, the sorcerous vanguard of doom. “Seems you were right on this one, Dash.” Applejack slightly praised. “Heh, told you so.” bragged Rainbow, which earned her a few eye rolls from her friend’s. Boomstick: He's Wiz and I'm Boomstick. Wiz: And, it's our job to analyze their weapons, armor, and skills to find who would win a Death Battle. Akuma (*Cues: Street Fighter IV - Old Temple*) Wiz: Akuma, master of The Fist. Known as Gouki in Japan, he is a living weapon, ten times stronger than nearly every other Street Fighter. Boomstick: Plus, he looks friggin' awesome, I totally want me some red, glowing eyes. When an image of Akuma showed up, everypony had to do everything in their power to to not run and hide from the walking demon in human skin. The only ones not cowering where Celestia and Luna, both giving the walking killing machine either a stone cold look from Celestia and a worried and… nostalgic look from Luna? Wiz: Akuma has dozens of powerful special attacks including the Gou Hadoken. a powerful blast with precision control. He can even use the almighty Shinku-Hadoken, which is, basically, a giant fireball of death. Boomstick: Man, if I ever fire a Hadoken in real life, I'mma die happy. “That's quite impressive, even some of the top unicorns in canterlot have a hard time using elemental magic.” Twilight praised as she was awed by the fact that their are some creatures that have mastered elemental attacks that easily. “Awww yeah! Now that's a cool move!” cheered Rainbow Dash, along with Pinkie and Spike agreeing with her. Gou Hadoken Total Control Can Fire Multiple at Once (That impressed quite a few in the crowd.) Shinku-Hadoken Can be Charged Usable in Midair (Zanku Hadoken) Wiz: Akuma also uses the Shoryuken uppercut, a teleport ability, a swift multi-striking hurricane kick, and the Hyakkishu, A.K.A the Demon Flip. Special Moves And Attacks Gou Shoryuken "Dragonfist" (Spiked like that one.) "Air Slashing" Hurricane Kick (Rainbow Dash instantly fell in love with that move.) Teleport (That gained a few wide eye’s.) Hyakki Shuu "Demon Flip" (*Cues: Hideyuki Fukasawa - Volcanic Rim Orchestral*) Boomstick: Also, Akuma's got tons of different Super Arts, but two really stand out. First there's the "Kongo...Kokuretsu Za... how do you say that? Wiz: No idea. “Huh? I thought Wizzy would know that word?” questioned and confused Pinkie Pie, getting a few nods in agreement as everyone, even the Princesses looked over towards Twilight, who in return gave them a flat stare. “... What? Just because we're smart, doesn't mean we know every little thing.” snarked the Princess of friendship. Boomstick: Well, I'm pretty sure that's Japanese for ‘Fuck You Up!’ 'Cause basically, Akuma punches the ground and things explode. Announcer:K.O. Boomstick: He shattered a whole friggin' island just by punching it. Holy shit! “WHAT THE BUCK!” cursed Applejack, as the others gasp at the insane feat of strength, “Not even the strongest earth ponies could do that!” Wiz: But that's not the deadliest move up his nonexistent sleeve. (Akuma uses his deadly move against Dan Hibiki and his health depleted afterwards) The Shun Goku Satsu, also known as the Raging Demon, literally means "Instant Hell Murder." The ponies and one dragon could only stare in awe as they saw Akuma’s most powerful move and could only hope they are never on the receiving end of something like it. Boomstick: Man, I'm going to totally name my first kid that. The Raging Demon at full power is fatal, this guy's a freakin' onslaught of pain! Wiz: That's right, Boomstick. Akuma lives for one thing, and one thing only: fighting. He travels the world day and night searching for worthy opponents. He's an unstoppable human Holocaust, losing only once to his brother Gouken, but after a brutal rematch… They could only gasp in horror as they saw the aftermath of the two brothers battle. But Luna was the worst off as her vision started to get blurry as the image changing only so slightly. The only differences were that instead of Gouken laying in a bloody heap, it was instead her own sister Celestia, and the mark on the was was replaced by a blood red crescent moon. “It’s just like one of the plans I made when I was still Nightmare Moon.” panicked the Lunar Princess, as she was finding more and more in common with the walking apocalypse. She was also started to violently shake and break into a cold sweat as she imagined this happening if she was never stopped back then when she was, Nightmare moon. But, she soon felt the warm embrace of her sister’s wing wrap around her and when she looked up she saw her sister’s warm smile beam down at her. Feeling her with warmth and helped wash the dark memories away. Boomstick: Oh hey, look! He can fingerpaint! “Not funny!” growled out Rainbow Dash, while the others in the group settled with just glaring at the T.V. Wiz: It was rumored that Akuma sacrificed his soul to a demon in exchange for the strength to defeat Gouken, but this has been declared non-canon. “Um... that’s good I guess?” guessed Fluttershy, really not seeing it make much of a differences with how Akuma acts anyway. Luna just sighed in relief in the fact that it was at least one less thing they had in common. Boomstick: Akuma's got one major problem, though. His stamina is absolutely pathetic. He can dish out the pain, but he sure can't take it. “Figures. A ruffian can’t handle the same pain that he causes others with.” snarked Rarity, showing her displeasure with Akuma. Wiz: It's crucial for Akuma to have total control over the fight. He takes an extremely offensive approach. Always moving, always attacking. Boomstick: Yeah, screw defense! Give me more ways to hurt people! “Now that doesn't seem real smart if you ask me.” remarked Applejack, gaining a few nods in agreement. Akuma: I am Akuma, and I will teach you the meaning of pain! When the analyzing was over Twilight quickly pushed pause so everyone could discuss. After a quick discussion, the group agreed that while Akuma’s past was a dark one that each member had different reason to dislike, no one could deny his strength and skill. Seeing as the group was done talking, Twilight quickly hit play. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Shang Tsung (*Cues: The Temple (Classic) - Mortal Kombat Trilogy*) Wiz: Shang Tsung is the cunning sorcerer from Outworld, and scheming pawn of Shao Kahn. He's extremely adept in magic and a well-rounded fighter. “While we can respect a warrior who tries to be well balanced, it’s the whole scheming part that has us worried.” stated Luna, feeling like she was not going to object. Boomstick: This guy can shoot flaming skulls, which is totally awesome, but, where the heck does he keep them? I mean seriously, how many skulls can a person carry around with them? “Ugh! I rather not think about that.” gagged Spike. Already not liking this guy. Flaming Skulls Can attack in Rounds of One, Two, or Three Fire Damage Swift & Deadly Unlimited Supply of Human Skulls (That got a few faces in the group to go green.) Wiz: Tsung can teleport around the battlefield with the special move called, "Hot Escape". Boomstick: Wah! Sucker punch, bitch! Hot Escape Teleport Ability Extremely Fast Wide Range Burns victims when Appearing Close Enough Sucker Punch This earned a few snickers from Rainbow Dash, Pinkie, Spike, and even from Luna herself found Boomsticks little comment funny. Wiz: He can morph into whomever he wants, giving him tons of different skill sets, it's like fighting a hundred different foes combined into one. Morphing Can change into Anyone He Knows Copies Abilities and Stats of Subject Enables Hundreds of New Strategies “It’s like fighting a souped up changeling!” pointed out Pinkie Pie, which caused everyone to shudder at the thought of someone like Chrysalis, having an even stronger shapeshifting power. Boomstick: Man, I wish I could morph into anybody I wanted. I can have some fun with that! He also has a razor sharp Straight Sword, though he usually keeps it hidden for a surprise attack. Straight Sword About Three Feet Long Secretly Hidden Of Unknown Make Prefers Fists & Magic Over Swordplay Rarity shuddered as she had a feeling on what Boomstick meant by “fun”. Wiz: Shang Tsung possesses one other strange, but useful ability. Long ago, when he was caught cheating in the Mortal Kombat tournament, he was cursed, by the elder gods, to rapidly age until an untimely death. The only way to prevent this fate is to absorb the souls of his victims. “He does what?!” everyone screamed, stunned at the horrifying new knowledge on their second fighter. This knowledge even caused Rarity to almost faint and to cause the sisters of the sun and moon to bristle in anger. “ONLY THE MOST FOUL OF CREATURES WOULD DEVOUR THE SOULS OF ANY OTHER LIVING BEING!!” screamed the Night Princess, in her full canterlot voice. Forget about any hesitation before, Akuma was now the warrior she would be rooting for. Soul Steal Sustains Youth Restores Energy & Health Gains Opponent's Memories & Skills Uses Skills for Morph Boomstick: He can literally eat your soul. Your soul! Not only can this heal him, but he gets the memories of the souls he devoured. “He’s no better than a parasite living on borrowed time by leaching it from others.” commented the Sun Princess coldly, as everyone else would either nod in agreement or continued glaring at the screen. (*Cues: The Soul Chamber (Classic) - Mortal Kombat Trilogy*) Wiz: This helps him copy the move sets of other fighters when he morphs. “Man! And we compared him to the changlings, now I feel bad for comparing them to this creep.” ranted Rainbow Dash. Boomstick: So really, his curse became his deadliest weapon. Good punishment there, gods. “Let’s decide to never make that somepony’s punishment ever.”muttered Twilight with her fellow rulers nodding in agreement. Wiz: Shang Tsung has lived and fought for over a thousand years. His sorcery, powers, and brutal Fatalities are rivaled by few, and he's claimed the title of Grand Champion of Mortal Kombat several times, Almost bringing about the winning streak necessary to allow Shao Kahn to invade, Earthrealm, key word being "almost". “Oh? This should be good.” grinned Rainbow Dash. Boomstick: Yeah, unfortunately for Shang Tsung, he pretty much sucks at actually accomplishing his goals. He's super powerful, but like most villains, he can never get around some goody-two-shoes standing in the way of global take-over. That caused quite a few to laugh at the thought of the mighty Shang Tsung, being no better than some of the villains that they've faced. Wiz: His only notable victories have included treachery and deceit. But, keep in mind, Tsung's not fighting any ordinary meat-heads. He's fighting demons, sorcerers, and gods, and even in defeat, he somehow keeps coming back more lethal than ever. They would give the man that, he was facing against some high odds and was still around causing trouble. Almost reminded the three alicorns of a certain centaur. Shang Tsung: You... will... DIE! Wiz: Alright the combatants are set, but before we end this debate, I need some cash to buy more rats for genetic testing. Boomstick and ponies: What? ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ While the trailer played out the group were quick to discuss about the fighters and who they would be rooting for. For Team Akuma it was Rainbow Dash, Pinkie Pie, Spike, And even Luna. For Team Shang Tsung… well no one wanted to root for him and the rest of the group settled with just enjoying the show. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Death Battle (*Cues: The Tower (Classic) - Mortal Kombat Trilogy*) Akuma walks on the stage when Shang Tsung suddenly appears behind him from his Hot Escape technique. Akuma jumps away to the other side of the battlefield, and prepares to fight. FIGHT! (*Cues: TGS '08 PV BGM - Street Fighter IV*) Tsung shoots a Flaming Skull, which Akuma dodges by jumping over. He shoots two Hadoukens in the air, and Tsung blocks them. Akuma attacks Tsung's feet, and knocks him even more off balance by hitting him with a hurricane kick. and knocks him in the air with a Shoryuken uppercut. While in the Air, Akuma hits him a few time and finishes the combo with a Shinku-Hadouken. Tsung lays on the ground and Akuma tries to finish him off, but Tsung transform into a fighter known as Scorpion. (*Cues: Unknown Theme*) Akuma stops and decides to see if this form is powerful enough to fight against, allowing him to get back up. “What the buck are you doing Akuma!? Finnish him off!” screamed Rainbow Dash, along with the rest of team Akuma. Scorpion: COME HERE! “Ooooh! I hope we get to see this guy in the future episode!” chreered Pinkie Pie. Shang Tsung throws the rope dart at Akuma and drags Akuma over towards him. He uppercuts Akuma, cueing the "Toasty Guy", Dan Forden, to appear in the right corner of the screen. Dan Forden: TOASTY! That caused quite a few members of the group even the two immortal Princesses off guard, they all soon laughed at the randomness of it. Shang Tsung then keeps him in the air by hitting him with flaming skulls that burst out of the ground. Akuma falls behind him and throws him to right. He them teleports behinds him and kicks him, which Tsung blocks. He fires a Hadouken, but Tsung uses Hot Escape to get away, then reappears and slashes Akuma with his sword. He then grabs Akuma and tries to steal his soul, which heals some of his health and drains some of Akuma's. Akuma breaks out of it by hitting him with a Hurricane Kick. Tsung runs toward him, but Akuma catches him off guard using the Kongo Kokuretsu Zan, which knocks him in the air. He then teleports over, hits him a few times, and then throws him. Tsung then lands on his feet and transforms into Akuma. “This is going to be so awesome!” muttered Spike, with stars in his eyes. (*Cues: Hideyuki Fukasawa - Volcanic Rim Orchestral Again*) The two prepare for battle. Everyone was on the edge of their seats wondering who would win this battle. The real Akuma or the imitation. (*Cues: Theme of Gouken vs Ryu - Street Fighter IV*) The two Akuma's then jump in the air and they attack, blocking each other's moves. One of the Akuma knocks the other into the ground and then tries to finish him off using the Kongo Kokuretsu Zan. However, the other Akuma grabs him and finishes him off with a Shun Goku Satsu. As one of the Akuma's stands with his back to the screen with the iconic Heaven Kanji confirming the kill, it is then shown that the Akuma lying dead on the ground is Shang Tsung, who shortly turns back into his original form, releasing his souls. Everypony cheered. K.O.! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Results (*Cues: Street Fighter IV - Volcanic Rim Opening Version*) Boomstick: Oh man, that was way too close! “I'll say!” Applejack agreed, while wiping a nervous sweat from her brow. Wiz: No kidding, Boomstick! Akuma's raw power and speed pressed a distinct advantage early on. But, Tsung's own cleverness and wide array of skills quickly even the odds. “It really pays off to make sure to have a few tricks up your sleeve.” added Twilight. Boomstick: It looked like Akuma had the whole thing wrapped up, but Tsung's morphing trick saved his ass. Wiz: Akuma's pride for battle almost cost him his life, as he stopped to see if his new face was worth a challenge. “That arrogance almost cost Akuma.” Rarity added in, while everyone gave a small glance towards their rainbow mane friend. Seeing her making a similar mistake if she was ever in a fight. “What?” asked the blue mare, when she started to notice everypony staring at her. Boomstick: After switching up strategies, Tsung managed to steal enough of Akuma's soul for some extra health and new abilities. Wiz: But, it wasn't enough. In the end, Akuma's skills as a fighter proved unmatched. Everyone had to agree with that, an imitation hardly ever beats the real thing. Boomstick: I mean, Tsung loses to Liu Kang all the time, and compared to Akuma, Liu Kang's the nicest guy in the world. There was no way he could take Akuma's constant punishment. The girls couldn't help but laugh at the smiley face that was placed over someone who they guess was Liu Kang’s face. Wiz: As Tsung isn't used to winning anything on his own, he wasn't perfect on delivering the final blow, leaving him wide open for the experienced Akuma to unleash his greatest weapon. Boomstick: The Raging Demon of Instant-Hell-Murder-Awesomeness! “Yeah!” cheered a certain blue mare. Wiz: And so Shang Tsung fell once again releasing his devoured souls, again. Boomstick: Looks like Tsung's all souled out! Ha ha, get it, Wiz? “*giggle* I get it Boomy!” giggled out Pinkie Pie, as the rest of the group could only facehoof at the lame pun. Wiz: The winner is Akuma. The members of team Akuma cheered none louder than the Princess of the Night herself. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Boomstick: next time on death battle! Everyone lean forward, exited on who the next set of fighters would be. The music was composed of angelic choir along with brass instruments. The contestant was a female warrior wearing a skin tight outfit that's red and blue with stars on them as well wearing metal bracelets on her wrists and wearing a golden tiara on her head showing the signs of royalty which caught the attention of the three Princesses in the room. She sports long black hair that flows past her shoulders. Her face is beautiful to the male and even to the female eye and she also had the most beautiful yet piercing blue eyes. Than an unknown feminine voice made itself known shortly after. Unknown: Goodnight Sugar. Preview END. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ “Well guys, do you think we could squeeze one more episode for the Princesses before we call it a day?” ask the Princess of Friendship, gaining nods of agreement from her friend’s. “While that's great to hear, but I think we all should take a small break before we start the next episode.” suggested the Sun Princess, as she got up to stretch her limbs. Everyone agreed with the two sisters and started to make their way back to the kitchen to restock on snacks. Everyone, but, Luna who told everyone she needed to use the restroom for a sec and was given some directions to find it from Spike. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~( Bathroom no. 21.)~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ As Luna finished splashing some water on her face she grab a towel and dried herself and released a shaky sigh as she looked at the mirror in front of her. And like all ways, she saw the image of Nightmare Moon in her reflection. Always there to mock her and remind her of her mistakes. But, the only difference was now Akuma stood next to her inner demon, arms folded and a dark glare was being sent in her direction. But Luna did not falter and sent a glare right back at them causing the two phantom to give a look of surprise at the Princess of the Night. “I know why you two are here.” stated the princess. “You're here to make me remember the monster I once was.” she continued as the two specters settled with giving her a calm look. “Well, I say you're wasting your time!” she yelled at the two images. “I’m tired of being held down by this guilt!” the lunar princess ranted. “I AM PRINCESS LUNA! RULER OF THE NIGHT AND GUARDIAN TO MY FRIENDS! I AM NO LONGER THE MONSTER NIGHTMARE MOON AND NEITHER WILL I BECOME A DEMON LIKE AKUMA!” declared Luna as she took a moment to catch her breath and then took a quick glance towards the mirror. The two phantoms stood there for a few agonizing seconds that seem to go on forever. But to Luna’s surprise they gave her a smile and vanished from the mirror's surface now only showed Luna’s surprised face staring back at her. She stood there for a few more seconds, before a smile made it’s way onto her face as she closed her eye’s and took a long relaxing breath. “*sigh*… Finally, it’s over.” stated Luna, as she left the bathroom and started to make her way back to the ballroom and to reunite with the people she loved the most. She never notices the soft white glow the coverd her for a split second. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Chapter 3 END. (Next time: Rogue VS, Wonder Woman.)
Rogue VS Wonder Woman.When Twilight’s group made their way back from the kitchen they quickly noticed Luna was already in her seat waiting for them. She gave off an air of peace and serenity that had not been there before, and had not been seen by her sister Celestia in years. “You seem in high spirits sister?” noted celestia with a warm smile. “Yes sister we- I mean I’ve done a little bit of thinking and I came up with a decision that I am most proud of.” replied Luna with a smile that could match her sister’s in warmth. The smile on celestia’s face just grew even bigger and warmer in response as she took a seat next to her sister and embraced her in a one wing hug. The rest of the group could only smile as they saw the two sisters show of affection towards each other. They then proceeded to make their way to their own seats while Twilight started up the last episode for today. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Interlude (*Cues: Invader - Jim Johnston*) Wiz: Superheroines. Millions have been drawn to these modern myths of comic book lore. Spike perked up at the word comic and started to get more excited for the episode. Boomstick: Or you could, uh, just be drawn to the way they're drawn. “I have a feeling I won’t like boomstick in this episode.” muttered Rarity. Wiz: Like Anna Marie, the Rogue… ‘The Rogue?’ thought the group. Boomstick: ...and Diana Prince, the Wonder Woman. Wiz: He's Boomstick and I'm Wizard. Boomstick: And we're here to watch two chicks duke it out! CATFIGHT! That caused the group to facehoof at boomstick. ‘Sweet~!’ Spike cheered inwardly. Wiz: It's our job to analyze their weapons, armor, and skills... Boomstick: And maybe a few other things. “Sigh… it’s going to be one of those moments.” muttered Rarity. Wiz: ...to find out who would win... a Death Battle. “Oh my even mr. wizard is getting annoyed.” noted Fluttershy. Rogue (*Cues: X-Men (2000) - The X-Jet*) Wiz: Rogue has possessed a variety of different powers over the years. For this duel in particular, we will use the most well known version; the original iteration from the comics and television show. Her deadliest weapon is her own skin. With just a touch, she absorbs a person's memories, talents, personalities, and abilities, whether superhuman or not, to use them herself. Power Absorption Activated throughout contact Absorbs memories, talents, personalities & abilities Temporary transfer Can use copied abilities Can be lethal with prolonged contact “No backstory for her?” Twilight asked. “Her powers must make her feel very lonely,” Fluttershy said sadly. “Though I have to say I wish to know how she makes her mane look so marvelous!” pipe in Rarity. Admiring the mutants wild yet beautiful locks. Boomstick: Too bad it knocks them out cold, and if she holds on long enough, it's game over. “What a terrible power to be burden with at such a young age.” stated Celestia sadly. Luna also gave the young woman a pitying look. Wiz: Tenacious foes like Juggernaut can resist it, but in the end, nobody is safe from Rogue's parasitic touch. For every second of contact, Rogue can keep these powers for a full minute. Though sometimes, there's unforeseen side effects. (*Cues: X-Men Theme - Hard Rock Remix*) Boomstick: She held on to Ms. Marvel for so long she absorbed her powers permanently. Now, she's got super strength, speed, and near invulnerability. Not that I blame her, though. I'd be holding' on to Ms. Marvel for as long as I could! Plus, then when she's unconscious I could... Ms. Marvel's Powers Super Strength ( Applejack liked that.) Flight at subsonic speed (and Rainbow Dash cheered when she heard that.) Near-Invulnerability Enhanced Reflexes Telepathic Resistance Seventh Sense “MOVING ON!” yelled Twilight while covering Spikes ears. Wiz: She also gained a seventh sense, the ability to unconsciously predict her opponent's' moves. “Now that’s a mighty fine ability.” AppleJack praised. Boomstick: But her seventh sense doesn't seem to always work. That or the writers just forgot about it 'cause, uh, Rogue gets her ass kicked a lot. “So much for a super power.” snarked Rainbow Dash Wiz: For plot convenience. Boomstick: And damn, she's got a hot ass. “What?” Everyone said at the same time. Wiz: What? Boomstick: Hey, that counts as a superpower in my book, Wiz! While she's not invincible, she doesn't have any real weaknesses either. She's a classy southern belle, who I'd like to take out to dinner. “Awww that’s kinda sweet.” cooed Rarity. Finding it sweet that boomstick thought Rogue as a classy lady. Wiz: Who can fly, lift buildings, and kill people just by touching them. Boomstick: Never mind! “Chicken!” mocked the blue speedster. Rogue: Ain't that enough? ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ The group had to admit that Rogue was a strong warrior and from what they saw a great hero as well. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Wonder Woman (*Cues: Wonder Woman (2009) - Ending Theme*) Wiz: To the uneducated nerd, Wonder Woman may seem a cheap clone of Superman. Boomstick: With Superboobies! “Uge…” groaned out Rarity while Rainbow Dash and Pinkie Pie laughed. Wiz: But in reality, she's a whole different story. Created from earth, born by god's, trained by ancient warriors… Master Combatant Trained since childhood Skilled at armed & unarmed combat Prefers fists over blades Best of the Amazons “Truly a fine warrior,” Luna said Boomstick: Maker of Wonder Bread! designer of the Wonderbra! Wiz: Boomstick, that's not true! Boomstick: See, I can do it to Wiz! “Hahahaha!!! Good one Boomy!” laughed Pinkie. Wiz: Wonder Woman is the incredibly powerful and near invincible ambassador of Themyscira, and self-appointed protector of the Earth. Boomstick: And she dresses like a stripper... a patriotic stripper! The girls wisely decided to ignore that little comment. Wiz: Diana Prince has been trained by the Amazons as a master combatant since childhood. She dueled the best of the best for the right to be crowned Wonder Woman. Her unearthly powers are divine, granted by ancient Greek gods and goddesses. From Demeter, she received superhuman strength and durability. Powers from Demeter Superhuman Strength Superhuman durability (resists all but blades & bullets) Magic Resistance Enhanced Healing Factor (*Cues: Justice League - Main Theme*) Boomstick: 'And you know that bitch Mailman god with the wingy shoes? Wiz: Hermes? Boomstick: Whatever. He gave Wonder Woman the ability to fly and move at hypersonic speed. Powers from Hermes Flight up to Mach-5 speed Superhuman reflexes (faster than Superman) Superhuman speed (VP to hyper-sonic) Wiz: She was given numerous other powers from enhanced senses, animal rapport, and blessings of wisdom and empathy. Other Powers Enhanced sight, smell, hearing, touch, & taste Multilingual Increased wisdom Superior Empathy Animal rapport 'Other useless stuff' “She can commune with animals?” questioned Fluttershy. Eyes sparkling in wonder. Boomstick: Aside from the obvious cannons rested right below her neck, she's got a pretty bizarre mix of weaponry. Her Lasso of Truth is a piece of unbreakable string that, well, makes you tell the truth. Lasso of Truth Forged by Hephaestus Unbreakable Infinitely elastic Forces the prisoners to tell the truth “Now that’s my kind of weapon,” Applejack said, thinking of all the uses she could use it for. Hippolyta: What other depraved thoughts must you be thinking? Col. Steve Trevor: God, your daughter's got a nice rack. Boomstick: Hell yeah, she does! At this point rarity could only cover her face with her hooves in frustration, while spike patted her shoulder. Wiz: She uses her tiara as a long range throwing weapon, using its razor sharp edge to slice open her enemies' throat. Boomerang Tiara Returns after each use Razor-sharp edges Can cut through most substances “Maybe we should get something like that, sister ” Luna said. Celestia looked at the tiara with a thoughtful look. Boomstick: Wonder Babe here uses the Bracelets of Submission, indestructible steel gauntlets forged from the remains of Zeus' legendary Aegis. These babies can block all sorts of attacks. Bracelets of Submission Indestructible Formed from the Aegis of Zeus Blocks blades, bullets, beams, & other attacks Can discharge lightning Wiz: She has persevered throughout the years, fighting a huge variety of foes, even killing the Greek God of War, Ares. Boomstick: Hear that, Kratos? A chick beat you to it! The group wondered who this Kratos person was or why the name brought a chill down their spines. Wonder Woman bashed the edge of the shield down to Mad Harriet. Wonder Woman: Let's see you smile now! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Wiz: Alright the combatants are set. let's end this debate once and for all. Boomstick: But first, I need singles from my very own stripper, thanks to Godaddy. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ \While the trailer played out everyone was discussing about the challenges and who they thought would win. On team Rogue we have Applejack, Rainbow Dash, Pinkie Pie, and Spike. And on team Wonder Woman. We have Twilight, Celestia, Luna, Rarity, and Fluttershy. With the teams set, everyone settled back down and let the trailer play through. Boomstick: Now it's time for a catfight Death Battle! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Death Battle (*Cues: Rogue's Theme - X-Men vs Street Fighter*) Rogue is shown flying in the sky. The Invisible Jet descends in background and Wonder Woman flies out. She kicks Rogue in the face, both Superheroines fly down to the ground. FIGHT! “Well that escalated quickly…” Twilight deadpanned. (*Cues: Unknown Theme*) Wonder Woman throws her tiara at Rogue, runs behind her, and roundhouse kicks her. The kick sends Rogue flying, Wonder Woman then flies after her, kicking her multiple times before dashing behind her again and punching her. She grabs a dazed Rogue with the Lasso of Truth and slams her on the ground numerous times, drags Rogue near her, and uppercuts her in the air. She darts around the airborne Rogue with a flurry of punches. “Whooowy! She ain't letting up for a second!” marveled Applejack. (*Cues: X-Men Theme - Hard Rock Remix*) When she punches Rogue in the face however, she absorbs some of Wonder Woman's powers, she absorbs more of her powers when she takes off her glove and touches her leg. While Wonder Woman breaks free, Rogue strikes her from behind, elbows her in the neck, and sends her soaring with a quick kick combo. Wonder Woman throws out her Lasso of truth again, but Rogue grabs it, tugs it, and slams her on the ground. Rogue flies behind her again and launches her tiara again, but Rogue blocks it, -propelling it back on her head- kicks her in the air and uppercuts her. Wonder Woman stops Rogue with several punches, but her finishing kick is blocked and she is knocked in the air. “That’s right! Her power works as long as her skin makes contact with the enemy.” realised Twilight. (*Cues: Wonder Woman (2009) - Ending Theme*) Rogue flies after her in the air, and is responded by a commotion of punches, Rogue blocks on of them and delivers some of her own, which is later black by Wonder Woman. She is then knocked down to the ground by a dive kick delivered by Wonder Woman. Both combatants fly down to the ground. Woman Woman dashes towards her with a flying kick, but it is interrupted by Rogue, who grabs her. “Here it comes!” yelled Rainbow Dash. Rogue: Good night, sugar! Rogue proceeds to plant a kiss of death upon Wonder Woman's lips, killing her. K.O.! Rogue then strikes a pose. Results (*Cues: X-Men (2000) - Main Theme*) Boomstick: Woo-hoo-hoo! This goes down in history as the best DEATH BATTLE! ever! Wiz: Poor Wonder Woman was more than a match for Rogue, but then she touched Rogue's face. “And that’s when it was all over for Wonder Woman.” commented Celestia. Boomstick: Wonder Woman is a trained fighter, so naturally she would strike her opponent's weakest spots, like the neck, stomach, joints and, well, the face. Wiz: In the end, her failure was a result of her thorough Amazonian training. “Sometimes it’s not wise to stick to the most basic strategy.” Luna commented “Indeed it’s always good to think outside the box.” added in Celestia. Boomstick: And her stripper outfit! Her leg was just begging the be grabbed there. Though personally, uh, I might have grabbed elsewhere. “... no comment.” muttered Rarity. Wiz: Wonder Woman's powers may be godly, but Rogue's taken similar powers before, so there's no reason to say she couldn't here. Adding Wonder Woman's strength and speed to Rogue's own power gave her a huge advantage, drastically turning the tide. Boomstick: A few high flying combos and our favorite X-Girl had Wonder Woman on the ropes. “Wonder woman just couldn't handle that kind of power.” commented Fluttershy. Wiz: And with her combined reflexes, speed, and seventh sense, she outmaneuvered Wonder Woman with one fatal kiss. Boomstick: Rogue sure "made out" in this fight! Again the group grond at Boomstick pun. Though like always Pinkie Pie was the only one who found it funny. Wiz: The winner is Rogue. Boomstick: Next time on Death Battle! Some 8-bit music starts to play and what we see is a field with strange floating blocks with question marks on them. A red, mushroom shaped creature with, legs angry eyes and a mouth enter the field. Shortly after, a four legged turtle also enters. FIGHT! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ‘Well it’s been fun but I bet we can all agree that we need to take a break from the show and get back to it tomorrow.” stated Twilight. Her statement was met with nods and words of agreement. As everyone parted ways and twilight and spike turn in for the night. The two sisters chose to fly their way back to canterlot instead of just teleporting their. “So sister, did you have fun with this show so far?” questioned the sun princess. Enjoying the breeze blowing through her mane. “Oh yes dear sister! Not only was the show entertaining but also helped me in certain things as well.” stated Luna as she twirled in the air. Enjoying this new feeling of freedom. “I can see that.” Celestia commented with a smile. Overjoyed with the fact that her sister had finally moved on from her guilt. “It was also nice to see a fellow princess do battle like that.” she added in. “Agreed! It reminds me of the days when you and me did battle against foul creatures and mad ponies that sought world domination.” agreed the night princess. Her eye’s glazed over with the memories of great battle and the taste of sweet victory. “Those were the days…” sighed the princess of the sun. memories of intense but rewarding battles playing through her head. The two sisters spent the next few minutes flying in silence. “HELP!!!” screamed a voice. Taking both sisters by surprise and snapping them both from their days dreams. They quickly look towards the direction they heard the voice saw a herd of ponies running through the forest covered in ash and soot. “What in harmony’s name?…” muttered Celestia. But before she had to think any harder on the strange site, her and her dear sister heard a roar that could rival the sound of thunder. Turning towards the new sound they spotted a small village in the distance.But they also spotted what was causing all of this chaos as well. For they saw placed right in the center of the small settlement, was a large dragon with sea green scales and large spikes on it’s back leading down it’s tail. From what they could tell it was at least as tall as the ponyville clock towar. Before Celestia could question further about a dragon being in equestria and attacking her people, she felt her sister lay a hoof on her shoulder. Turning her gaze towards her sister she saw that Luna had a small grin on her face. “What do you say sister? For old times sake?” the lunar princess ask, pointing at the giant dragon. All she got from her older sister was a similar grin in response. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ( With the dragon.) ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ “GAHAHAHAHA!!!” bellowed the green behemoth as he let loose another stream of sickly green flames onto another building. “LOOK AT THE LITTLE PONIES RUN! GAHAHAHAHAHA!!!” laughed the green beast as he knocked down a clock tower with one swing of his tail. But his twisted sense of fun was cut short as he notice something casting a shadow over him. Looking upwards he spotted two figures descending from the sky towards him and when he focused his sights on them he was able to make out what they look liked, and to his horror he saw that the two figures where the very rulers of the ponies he was just tormenting. Said princesses rocketed towards the scaled brute. Eye’s burning with fury and horn’s charged with potent magical energy, ready to bring down justice down onto the unlucky villain. ‘Oh shit.’ thought the dragon, right before his world exploded into a symphony of pain and regret. CHAPTER 4. END. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Next time Goomba VS Koopa.
Goomba VS Koopa.We find our heroes the next in the ballroom getting ready to continue their watching spree of DEATH BATTLE. But their progress was halted by a certain blue pegasus. “OH COME ON TWILIGHT! Can’t we just skip this one!?” complained Rainbow Dash. “For the last time dash, NO!” Twilight yelled. Getting frustrated with her rainbow maned friend’s constant whining. “You just got to grit your teeth and bear it Dash.” added in Applejack. The blue speedster let out a load groan of frustration as the rest of the group took their seats in front of the television. “Aaaand start!” sang Twilight as she clicked play. Interlude (*Cues: Invader - Jim Johnston*) Wiz: The Mushroom Kingdom is a world that houses many strange and interesting creatures, like the Goomba, a walking brown mushroom with fangs. “A mushroom?” Applejack asked, confused by this fighter. “With fangs?” Fluttershy asked, equally confused as her blonde friend. “Teehee that’s funny.” giggled Pinkie Pie as she handed out some cupcakes to her friends. Boomstick: And the Koopa, that stupid turtle who always gets himself killed. “WHAT?” Rainbow yelled, mad that the host was disrespecting a turtle. Her little outburst caused her to drop her cupcake. Wiz: Every video game has its share of basic endless common enemies, and you can't get anymore common than these two. Boomstick: But which is the best of the worst? He's Wiz and I'm Boomstick. “This is gonna be lame,” Spike said, grabbing a handful of gems and shoving them in his mouth. Wiz: And it's our job to analyse their weapons, armor and skills to find out who would win a Death Battle. Goomba (*Cues: Melty Molten Galaxy - Super Mario Galaxy*) Wiz: The Goomba's used to be steadfast allies of the Mushroom Kingdom. After years of oppression due to their low intelligence and short stature, they betrayed their own mushroom brethren and became the backbone of Bowser's vast army. “They would betray their own brethren?” Twilight questioned. “Those no good varmints!” raged applejack. Disgusted that they would turn their backs on what Applejack saw as their family. Rainbow Dash also glared at the goombas on the sole fact that they would betray someone and join the bad guy. Boomstick: The Goomba's main combat strategy is just to walk directly into its opponents. While this isn't the smartest thing to do, it takes some real "spores" if you know what I'm sayin'. Plus, they also have these vampire fangs, but they don't ever seem to use them, and... thinking about it, why does a mushroom even have a mouth? Basic Combat Strategies: Charges into opponents Not very strong Adapts well to various environments Useless Fangs “That’s their strategy? Walk into their opponents?” Twilight said, her eye twitching a bit. “Even I find that dumb.” Pinkie Pie surprisingly deadpanned. Wiz: When available, the Goomba will, use the green Goomba's Shoe to get the jump on its foes, easily able to hop over twelve feet in the air. Goomba's can also sprout wings becoming Paragoomba, capable of barely sustained flight. Goomba's Shoe: Gives jumping ability Cannot be pierced by Spikes or Spinies Also called "Kuribo's Shoe" Can be stolen easily “Oh great this losers can can fly know.” snarked rainbow dash with even Fluttershy nodding in agreement. Annoyed that this little creatures were pretty much mocking the one thing all peguses took pride in. Boomstick: And when flyin', the mushroom thing can bomb victims below with Micro-Goombas. You know you're a badass when you throw babies as weapons! “NO IT DOES NOT!!!” screamed the terrified group, quickly growing to hate the goomba’s. Paragoomba Wings: Enables slow flight Better suited for hovering Easily clipped Can drop Micro-Goombas as living bombs Baby Killers Wiz: The traditional Goomba may seem a useless pawn, but these troopers have been know to accomplish the impossible. The girls and one dragon could only gawk at the sight of a goomba holding a baseball bat without arms or magic. Boomstick: Wait a minute, is that Goomba playing baseball? With no hands? Oh my God, it has telepathy powers! Wiz: Telekinesis? No, it doesn't. Boomstick: Well then how's it holdin' it?! “That’s what we would like to know.” Rarity said. Telekinesis Powers?: Can use baseball bats w/o hands & arms Not really, they're just weird like that... Wiz: Goomba's are unwaveringly brave, never backing down from a fight and always ferociously charging into battle without hesitation. Though, sometimes their stubborn courage can backfire. “Sounds like someone I know.” snarked Applejack. Giving her blue friend a flat look witch she returned in full. Boomstick: Yeah, you'd think it would stop walking when impending death is directly in front of it. Everyone facepalmed at that one. Wiz: After dissecting a ...voluntary Goomba myself, I discovered it's brain to be less than half the size of an acorn, proving what we've always known... Boomstick: Goomba's are fuckin' morons. After that quick review of the goomba’s, everyone admitted that the goomba’s where lame. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Koopa (*Cues: New Super Mario Bros. Wii - Castle Theme*) Wiz: Bowser's second most common foot soldier is the Koopa Troopa, the Turtle Warrior. Boomstick: Like Ninja Turtles!? “Awesome!” yelled Pinkie. Wiz: No, not Ninja Turtles. Boomstick/Pinkie Pie: Awh... “Those sounds awesome!” cheered rainbow dash, with everyone agreeing that ninja turtles did sound surprisingly cool. Wiz: While the Goombas are the backbone, the Koopas are prevalent enough to have Bowser's army named the "Koopa Troop". “Aw ya! Of course a turtle would be cool enough to have a troop named after them!” cheered Rainbow Dash, getting a few laughs from her friends. Boomstick: Koopas have their own set of Paratroopa wings that can fly for several minutes with no problem. “Well at least it’s better than the goombas” Applejack commented. Paratroopa Wings: Enables slow flight Decent aerial control Easily clipped Not exactly the best flyers Wiz: Koopas are also fairly skilled in Tennis, Baseball, Basketball and Go-kart driving. “That turtle is pretty talented,” Twilight said “Wonder if Tank could do some of those things?” Rainbow asked, imagining her pet playing all kinds of sports with her. Other Skills: Various Sports Running Banks Creating seaside resorts Go-Kart Racing Ruining safaris Forming lame gangs Boomstick: Are you sure it's not a Ninja Turtle? Wiz: Their best offence is also their finest defence, the Koopa shell, made of a tough steel-like substance capable of withstanding over 200 pounds of pressure. Boomstick: As an offensive weapon, the Koopa shell can destroy almost anything! It's a living torpedo of pain! Koopa Shell: Extremely durable Withstand over 200 lbs. Demolishes anything that is destructible Bounces off walls Comes in a variety of collectible colors “AWESOME!!” yelled the blue speedster. Wiz: There seems to be a common misconception that it takes Mario two hits to kill a Koopa. Actually, it only takes one. There just happens to be this durable shell in the way. However, this leads to the Koopa's greatest weakness. When Mario jumps on a Koopa's back, rather than retaliating, it retreats into its shell. Why? Boomstick: 'Cause they're a bunch of pussies! “They really cowards.” Rarity commented, even fluttershy was braver than this cowardly creatures. Wiz: That's right, Boomstick. The Koopas are cowards, afraid to face a dangerous foe. Some run from danger but most just hide in their thick shell. “Man I feel bad for tank being the same species as this chickens with shells.” Spike dryly commented Boomstick: Then again, if I were carrying an impenetrable fortress on my back and... some large Italian man was trying to murder me, I'd probably hide in it too. “I would have to agree with Mr. Boomstick there.” agreed fluttershy. Wiz: But you'd think as soon as Mario picked up the shell, it would a perfect time to counterattack, right? And even when they're flying after a good kick, they refuse to stick their feet out and stop themselves. Boomstick: Well... eh... ah, yeah, you're right, they're bitches. “Agreed.” everyone said. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ After the analyzing was done. It was pretty quick to see who was on which team. Goomba: no one. Koopa: Rainbow Dash Pinkie Pie. Everyone else: neutral. Now that the “teams” were set, twilight quickly hit play. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Wiz: Alright, the combatants are set, let's end this debate once and for all. Boomstick: It's time for a Death Battle! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Death Battle (*Cues: Super Marioland Theme - Remix*) The Koopa emerges from a Warp Pipe and calmly walks through the field. When he meets the Goomba, he stops. FIGHT! (*Cues: King Bowser - Super Mario Galaxy*) The Koopa and the Goomba both sprout wings, becoming the Paratroopa and the Paragoomba. They take to the air and fly into each other 4 times. After flying in a circle, the Koopa tries to hit the Goomba by doing something similar to the Spin Dash from Sonic the Hedgehog, but misses. As the Goomba smiles, the Koopa ricochets of a wall and hits the Goomba, who falls under a Thwomp, which he manages to avoid, He also avoids 3 more Thwomps but gets hit again by the Koopa, who is squashed under a fifth Thwomp. The Goomba lands near a cannon, followed by the Koopa. As they both fly up, the cannons fire at them both. As they dodge the cannonballs and Bullet Bills, they trade a few blows. The Koopa tries to hit the Goomba using the trick he tried earlier, but mises and continuously ricochets of the walls again. When he stops, 6 Bullet Bills fly up, but the Goomba stops them by dropping Micro-Goombas onto them. After dodging 2 more Bullet Bills, the Goomba and Koopa are high in the air. As they fly into each other some more, the Angry Sun attacks the Goomba and the Koopa. While the Koopa successfully evades the Sun, the Goomba is hit and loses his wings. Luckily, he lands in a Kuribo's Shoe. As the Koopa descends, the Goomba hops towards his opponent in the shoe. The Koopa hides under a line of Breakable Blocks as the Goomba hops on the Blocks above him. The Koopa tries to escape by flying to the right then quickly flying into the pipe, but the Goomba hits the Koopa, knocking him into the Pipe. The Goomba hops after the Koopa, but gets attacked by a Piranha Plant emerging from the pipe. The Koopa (who lost his wings from the attack) come out the other end of the pipe, to meet a group of Red Goombas who live underground. The Goomba appears and hits the Koopa, causing him to hide in his shell. As the Red Goombas dance victoriously, the Goomba spots a pool of Lava near the Koopa. The Red Goombas continue to dance as the Goomba advances towards the Koopa and kicks him, causing him to slide towards the lava. Luckily, the pool of Lava is small enough for the Koopa to slide over it and hit a block, causing him to slide into the Goomba and the Red Goombas. Unfortunately, he also slides into a much larger pool of Lava, reducing him to a skeleton (Dry Bones ). “That… was… AWESOME!!!” screamed rainbow dash. While everyone was stunned on how intense the battle was Double K.O.! Results (*Cues: Desolate Path - Super Mario 64*) Boomstick: Oh man, I thought this was gonna suck! That was awesome! Who knew those little fuckers could fight like that? “A’ll say!” a stunned Applejack commented. Wiz: The Goomba's arsenal proved effective enough, but its own stupidity became its downfall. “Good tools are are mere toys in the hands of a simpleton.” Twilight said. Boomstick: Then the Koopa wussed out and kept to the safety of his shell, not stopping in time to avoid the Giant Pool of Lava Death. “A huge blunder on his part.” deadpanned Rarity. Wiz: Even the Koopa's tough shell can't protect it from fire. “Poor things.” whimpered fluttershy. Boomstick: You might say this battle really heated up in the end. Cue facepalm and one laughing fit from Pinkie. Wiz: This battle is a Draw. END. Boomstick: Next time on Death Battle. The main Six and Spike are now expecting a more exciting fight and they seem to have their wish granted. What they see are two manly, shirtless hulking men that looked like they were overdosed with testosterone with epic facial hair and are now being pitted against each other in earth shattering battle. “.....” The girls and one drake stared at the scene after seeing that epic trailer. “NEXT EPISODE NOW!!!” the rest of the group yelled as twilight hastily hit play. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ CHAPTER END. Next episode Mike haggar VS. Zangief
Haggar VS Zangief.The group quickly gathered around the tv with a fresh set of snacks and drinks. All were excited to see the two titans clash, but twilight was quick to notice that her southern friend Applejack looked a little hesitant to watch the next episode and constantly looked towards the clock when she thought no one was noticing, “Is there a problem Applejack?” Twilight whispered as she walked up to her blond friend. Said mare jump, not noticing her lavender friend approaching her. Quickly giving her a awkward smile Applejack traid to come up with an excuse on why she was acting so funny but croumbled under the Princess of friendships stare. “Sigh… sorry Twi I don’t mean to ruin everyone’s fun, but i’m just a little distracted with some things back at the farm.” admitted the blond mare “Oh? Whats wrong AJ, if there somthing going on you know me and the girls will always help.” offered the young alicorn with a smile, which earned her one in return. “Well you see Twilight me and my family have been dealing with… well you see.” stuttered the blond mare at the end. “Yes?” urged Twilight. “We've been dealing with a… bugbear.” Applejack admitted in defeat. “A bug bear!?” hissed Twilight quietly as to not alert their other friends. “Shhhh! Quite! It’s not that big of a deal.” Applejack said hastily “No big deal!? Don’t remember how much trouble a bug bear gave us?” whispered Twilight. “A’h remember what that old varment did but this isn’t the same!” argued Applejack. “This is a young bugbear. It’s barely half the size of the first one and me and Big Mac can chase it off ourselves.” she explained. “But by the time we do it’s already torn down one of our tree’s and ate all of the apples on it.” she explained further with a sigh of frustration. “So that’s why you’ve been nervous? Twilight questioned. “You're worried that it will attack the farm again while you're gone?” “Ya… and i was wondering after this episode, that it would be ok for me to run back to my farm real quick and check up on things?” asked a hopeful Applejack. “... Sighe. Fine, but it this keeps up then me and the rest of the girls are helping.” declared Twilight. Giving her apple friend a hard look, as to dare her to challenge her decision. After that was done the two made their way towards the rest of their friends and Twilight hit play. Interlude (*Cues: Invader - Jim Johnston*) Wiz: Capcom has produced hundreds of deadly warriors, but few can best these two hulking leviathans. Boomstick: Haggar, the mayor elect of Whoop ass… Why would he spank a donkey?” questioned a confused Pinkie Pie. Wiz: ...and Zangief, Russia's red Cyclone. “So cool!” praised rainbow dash. Boomstick: These two wrestlers have never met in person but their rivalry is legendary and it's about time they duked it out! “Their rivalry is legendary but they never met?” questioned Spike. “It must mean their fans are the one’s who keep arguing and fighting over who’s best.” explained rainbow Dash. All too familiar on how crazy some fans get over their idols. (Scootaloo was still in trouble for picking a fight with a girl who thought Lightning Dust was cooler than Rainbow Dash.) Wiz: I'm Wizard and he's Boomstick and it's our job to analyse their weapons armour and skills to find out who would win a Death Battle. Haggar (*Cues: Muscle Bomber/Saturday Night Slam Masters - Mike Haggar (Original CPS1 Arcade Version*) Boomstick: Standing 6 foot - 7 and weighing 266 pounds, 30 of which is probably in his manly mustache, it's Mike Haggar! “That’s an awesome mustache,” Spike said, awed by the magnificent facial hair. “I’ll say.” cooed Rarity as she fanned herself. Totally stunned by the muscles on the first contestant. Wiz: For many years, Haggar was a champion wrestler of Slam Masters until being elected mayor of Metro city, a metropolis overrun with street gangs. “And he's a mayor? Mayor Mare better watch out,” Pinkie said, wondering if he’s better than their own mayor. Boomstick: Too bad there aren't more badasses in office. Most mayors would just put up laws against crime or increase the police force but Mike takes matters into his own hands. Background Height: 200 cm / 6'7" Weight: 121 kg / 266 lbs. Fighting Style: American Wrestling & Scottish Backhold Mayor of Metro City, former wrestler “I would so vote for him if he was running for mayor,” Rainbow said, imagining Haggar running Ponyville. “As would I, darling. It's refreshing to see a higher authority fight for their city,” Rarity said American Wrestling Grabs Holds Twists Quick Strikes Submissions Tie-Ups Wiz: Haggar is a former pro American wrestler, specializing in grabs, holds and quick strikes. He's of Scottish ancestry and proud of it, even having a scottish flag on his gym. It's likely he has also trained in Scottish backhold wrestling, which involves bear hugging an opponent and keeping your balance while overpowering theirs. Scottish Backhold Focused on Balance Grappling Pressure Sustained Grip No ground work involved “Hmmm interesting.” Applejack remarked, as the wheels started to turn in her head. Boomstick: Haggar's got a devastating move set ranging from Suplexes, Body Splashes and his own invention, Spinning clothesline double lariat, which Zangief stole for his own use. To even the score, Haggar copied Gief's spinning piledriver. When Haggar isn't overpowering people with his pure manliness, his weapon of choice is a blunt pipe. Hey, he's a mayor that kicks ass and recycles. Notable Moves Suplex Piledriver Backflip Drop Body Splash Spinning Clothesline Lariat Spinning Piledriver Steel Pipe Favored melee weapon Decent Projectile “That’s good!” Fluttershy commented. (*Cues: Unknown Theme*) Wiz: Even after his victorious election, Haggar continued his vigorous training. Boomstick: By Piledriving Sharks! “WHAT?” everyone screamed in either excitement, Rainbow and Spike, to awe, Rarity and Applejack, or in terror for the rest. “This guy's my hero,” Rainbow and Applejack said at the same time. Wiz: It appears Haggar wrestles Bull Sharks, one of the deadliest sharks on Earth. These can grow up to 11 feet long and weigh up to 500 pounds. Wrestling these proves Haggar's proficiency in the Scottish backhold, as he keeps his balance against the thrashing sharks until he can piledrive them into the beach. Bull Sharks 7-11 ft. long 500 lbs. Very dangerous Swims near shores often Wrestling demonstrates Scottish Backhold “And he piledrived one of those ghastly creatures?” Rarity asked, not sure what to believe. Next to her, Fluttershy felt bad for the poor animal. Boomstick: Next "Jaws" movie needs more Haggar! Wiz: Unfortunately, during his time as mayor, Haggar was undoubtedly forced to prioritize politics over training. It's likely he didn't have much time to learn new techniques or train against many other wrestlers. As a result, he uses moves and skills from an older era. “As the life of a ruler.” commented Twilight. Knowing the pains of not practicing your craft as much as you used too. Boomstick: They seem to work pretty damn well! Wiz: He certainly hasn't lost his touch. Announcer: "Mike Haggar, the candidate who puts people first." Haggar growls and kills a Bald Eagle who has perched on his arm. “Birdie NO!” cried out fluttershy. Zangief (*Cues: Zangief Theme (Atomic Fusion Remix) - Street Fighter II*) Wiz: Zangief stands 7 feet tall at 350 pounds, weighing in as one of the strongest on the Street Fighting circuit. Background Height: 214 cm / 7'0" Weight: 181 kg / 400 Ibs Hobbies: Wrestling, cossack dancing, vodka drinking Fighting Style: Russian Wrestling & Sambo Boomstick: And as a testament to his manliness, check out that wicked shin hair! Rarity shuddered at the amount of hair. Wiz: Zangief is a champion wrestler in Russia, using push and pull techniques to throw his opponents off balance. He also specialises in Sambo, a combination of wrestling and martial arts. He's not skilled in leglocks and chokeholds but his grappling, submissions and groundwork are second to none. Russian Wrestling: Grabs & holds Tie-Ups Throws from Tie-Ups Push & Pull opponent to throw off balance Counter-Attacks when foe loses balance Boomstick: Zangief's best moves include his double Lariat, Atomic Suplex, flying Power bomb and a wicked backhand called the Banishing Flat, a move Zangief learned specifically to counter projectiles! Zangief... Hates... Projectiles! Sambo: Mix of wrestling & martial arts Uses tactics from Vikings, tartars, & golden horde Grappling, ground work, & submissions No leg locks or chokeholds “He would hate twilight then.” a cheeky Rainbow Dash said. Getting said lavender alicorn to roll her eyes at her friend. Wiz: His signature move is the Spinning Piledriver, which he learned after getting caught in a cyclone while piledriving a bear. Notable Moves: Double Lariat Flying Power Bomb Atomic Suplex Body Splash Banishing Flat Spinning 'Screw' Piledriver “B-but that's not scientifically possible,” Twilight said, trying to wrap her head around this impossible feat. “Well he did it,” Pinkie said as she munched on a cupcake. “Hmmmm I could use that…” muttered Applejack as she kept her full attention on screen. Boomstick: That's the most awesome thing I've ever heard! “I know,” Spike, Rainbow and Applejack said in amazement. Wiz: Actually, wrestling bears has been Zangief's favourite training exercise since he was a kid. Supposedly, he wrestles Grizzly bears, but these are not native to Russia. It's far more likely he wrestles Ussuri Brown Bears, which can weigh up to 1500 pounds, well over twice the size of a full grown Grizzly. Ussuri Brown Bears Up to 1500 lbs. Twice as large as grizzly bears Rarely in packs Occasionally he wrestles polar bears “That bigger than Harry,” Fluttershy muttered. Boomstick: Holy shit! He piledrived one of those into a Tornado!? “What a beast!!!” screamed a ecstatic Rainbow Dash. Wiz: Battling such a massive beast corresponds with his Russian wrestling training perfectly, forcing the bears to lose their balance and knocking them out cold! Zangief is a loyal Russian through and through, always fighting for his country rather than personal gain. He is often employed by the Russian President as the country's official fighting representative. That said, Zangief is pretty dimwitted, more a follower than a leader. He fights with instinct rather than reason. “Well at least he cares for his people.” fluttershy added. Boomstick: All the more reason to get out of his way! Zangief: (Attacks the Duck Hunt Dog and piledrives it) Mmmmhhh! Me Zangief broke you! “Not the puppy!” cried fluttershy. Wiz: Alright the combatants are set. Boomstick: The Unstoppable-Force against the Immovable-Mayor! Wiz: Let's end this debate once and for all. Boomstick: Wait up, first I gotta pay for my lazor guided Kitten Cannon. "What!?" The girls screamed in disbelief. This guy was going shoot kittens out of a cannon?! How mosterouse! Wiz: Lazor what? Boomstick: Thanks to Netflix. Suc it up you babies this kitten cannon is important to me! (sound of a cannon shooting and then the screeching of a cat) ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ As the trailer played out everyone was quick to choose sides. On team Haggard: Twilight, Fluttershy, Rarity. And on team Zangief: Spike, Pinkie Pie, Rainbow Dash. Applejack liked them both so she was rooting for them both. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Boomstick: It's time for a Death Battle! Death Battle (*Cues: Intro Theme - Saturday Night Slam Masters*) Zangief and Haggar stand in a deserted street. Haggar stretches his muscles and rips his shirt while Zangief removes his cape, points upwards and laughs, and drinks a bottle of beer before crushing the bottle. “Things are about to go down.” a wide eyed Rainbow Dash commented FIGHT! (*Cues: Lobby Screen - Street Fighter IV*) Haggar and Zangief both grab each other and look each other in the eyes before Zangief throws Haggar behind him. He tries to attack Haggar with a flying kick, only to get blocked. He tries to punch him, but his punches get blocked too. (*Cues: Unknown Theme*) After dodging Zangief's lariat, Haggar suplexes him, attacks him with a lariat and kicks him. Zangief suplexes Haggar twice and piledrives him before throwing him across the street. “This is getting intense” Twilight stuttered. As Zangief advances, Haggar kicks him and attacks him with a steel pipe but Zangief counters with the Banishing flat, knocking him into a building, which Zangief enters to finish the duel. As they fight, they also go upstairs. A couch, a globe, Princess Peach, a Dragon ball, Big the Cat and Pedobear get thrown out the building. “What kind of crazy building are they fighting in!?” yelled a confused spike. (*Cues: Historic Distillery Stern - Street Fighter IV*) Haggar and Zangief's fists hit each other and Haggar tries and fails to hit Zangief but Zangief suplexes Haggar near a window and, after a few blocked punches, throws himself at Haggar, sending them both out the window. “Watch out below!” screamed Pinkie Pie. Zangief tries to pile drive Haggar into the pavement, but then Haggar begins to turn the tides and tries to piledrive Zangief, then Zangief tries to piledrive Haggar, then Haggar tries to piledrive Zangief. This goes on for a while until they both hit the pavement. As the dust clears, Haggar and Zangief are both seen lying down on the pavement. But Haggar has blood around his head, indicating his death, then, Zangief stands up, points both arms upward and laughs triumphantly. K.O.! Results (*Cues: Ultra Street Fighter IV - The Next Door: Indestructible (Instrumental)*) Boomstick: Aahh.. a great man has fallen today... “Me too.” mourned everyone as they wiped away strays tears. Sad that such a great man had died. Wiz: Haggar and Zangief's similar moveset appeared evenly matched, anticipating each other's moves and countering with their signature attack. Boomstick: He's led a long productive life, kicking ass, ruling Metro City and keeping the beaches safe from rogue sharks… “Stop it! I’m going to cry.” wailed Rainbow Dash. Wiz: Not only is Zangief almost 100 pounds larger than Haggar, he's also 13 years younger and been training all his life. “Youth and experience always wins out in the end.” muttered a sad Applejack. Boomstick: I'm gonna miss that wonderful mustache! “US TOO!!” everyone cried as they all became a blubbering mess. Wiz: Zangief's youth and lack of political agenda were enough to give him a slight edge. “Sniff… that's also another strong factor as well.” commented Twilight sadly. Boomstick: Poor Haggar. He may piledrive sharks, but Zangief's bears were three times larger and probably twice as dangerous! Sure Haggar can grapple a half ton shark without falling over, but if Zangief can push around 1500 pound bears as a hobby, Haggar didn't stand a chance. Wiz: He definitely put up a great fight though. Everyone agreed with that full heartedly. Boomstick: That, he did. He just found his window of opportunity. Wiz: The winner is Zangief. Everyone cheered for the red cyclone of Russia, but quieted down as the next battle was about to be announced. Boomstick: Next time on Death Battle. The next contestants weren't two… but four! Four anthropomorphic turtles with different colored mask where shown on screen with the following message. BATTLE ROYALE. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ As soon as the episode was over, Twilight hit pause so everyone could get up and stretch and move about. “Well girls before Twi starts the next episode, A’h need to make a quick run back to the farm to check on things.” Applejack said. “Well don’t keep us waiting too long Applejack.” replied Rarity. “Also try to bring some cider for the next episode.” requested Rainbow Dash. “Haha. sure thing girls.” the southern pony said as she made her way back home. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ (later at sweet apple acres) ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ We now find ourselves in Sweet Apple Acres. The only place to find a tasty apple in all of ponyville. To which a certain monster would agree to. For we now see a creature devouring the fruit from one of the Apple Family’s pride and joy Apple tree’s. It appears to be a hybrid between an insect and a bear. It possesses a bear's body with the fur coloring of a panda, along with two additional arms, as well as insectoid antennae, wings, and the stinger of a hornet, and it was currently stuffing it’s face with the livelihood of a certain blond mare. “I knew I would find you here today while the farm was unguarded.” Applejack said, as she marched her way towards the gluttonous monster. Said monster could only stare at the approaching blond pony before letting out an amused chuckle. It then tossed the apple it was eating aside and charged it’s soon to be dinner. But Applejack was ready for this and when the greedy creature took a swing at her, she quickly ducked under the first swing and then she turned her back to the beast and reared her legs back and then she bucked the monster right in the face with all her might! Launching it into the air, where it was too stun to use it’s wings to fly. Not letting this chance pass by, applejack jumped into the air and quickly wrapped her legs around the beast and did the impossible. She started to spin in mid air, faster and faster until her and the bugbar where nothing but a blur that crashed into the ground, kicking up a cloud of dirt. Once the dust settled the scene we are treated to was of the bugbear’s defeat! As it laid there unconscious and with a large lump and it’s head right where it’s cranium made contacted with the ground. And our hero stood over the beast with a triumphant grin plastered on her face. But fatigue quickly caught up to her and she soon fell on her rump in exhaustion. But her grin was still in place because she was too proud of what she did to let some sore muscles get in the way of her happiness. “Hahaha! How do like them apples? I did it!” Applejack cheered to heavens. But unbeknownst to her, in the very heavens where the masters of the sacred piledriver that she imitated in her fight with the bugbear. Looking down at her with proud smiles. “It seems we have a worthy successor to our art my Russian friend.” said the mustached mayor of metro city. “BWAHAHAHAHA!! True my friend! Little pony makes mother Russia proud with that battle with monster bear!!” laughed the red cyclone in pure joy. “HA agreed!” laughed Haggar, as he and Zangief made their way through the pearly gates, Knowing that there was someone out there to carry on their legacy. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ CHAPTER END. NEXT TIME, TMNT BATTLE ROYAL!
Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles Battle RoyaleIt didn’t take long for Applejack to get freshen up and to grab a barrel of cider, mutch to the enjoyment of Rainbow dash and now that she was back, twilight quickly it play to start the last episode for today. Interlude (*Cues: Invader - Jim Johnston*) Wiz: Leonardo, Donatello, Michelangelo, Raphael. The Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles were grown from ooze and raised by a warrior rat in the sewers of New York to be the world's most fearsome fighting team. “.... what?” muttered Twilight. Boomstick: Lots of superheroes have some weird origin stories but this one is plain ridiculous! “It does sound pretty farfetched,” Spike said, as he looked at the somewhat strange team. “And The Power Ponies don’t?” Twilight deadpanned while rolling her eyes. “It’s a bit more believable than this,” Spike muttered, believing aliens were more realistic than mutant turtles. Wiz: Their greatest advantage in battle is their family bond and teamwork. But, on their own, which Turtle is deadliest? “I don’t like the sounds of this,” a nervous Applejack said. Starting to get a bad feeling about this episode. Boomstick: He's Wiz and I'm Boomstick. Wiz: And it's our job to analyse their weapons, armor and skills to find out who would win a Death Battle. Leonardo (*Cues: Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (1987) - Main Theme (MARCH REMIX)*) Wiz: Leonardo, the leader of the team is smart, strategic with a strong sense of honor. “Sounds almost like Twilight,” said Pinkie Pie. “More like my brother,” Twilight muttered, imaging Shining’s reaction to the blue masked turtle. Background Height: 5'2" Weight: 180 lbs. Master of Ninjitsu, Bushido, & Swordsmanship Leader & Strategist Favorite Color: Blue Skilled in using environment Boomstick: Too bad he traded his sense of humour for that sense of honor. This guy always means serious business. His weapon of choice is the Ninjaken swords: Shorter, sturdier and straighter than an ordinary Katana, and designed for swift deadly strikes! Out of all the Turtles' weapons, the Ninjaken is the only one specifically designed to murder people! What's better than one Ninjaken? Two, Damnit! Ninjaken Sword 2' long blade Designed for swift, deadly, offensive strikes Also called Ninjato Commonly referred to as Katana Invented in Hollywood “It was pretty rare to see any royal guard wielding two weapons back in canterlot,” commented Twilight. Wiz: In many timelines, Leonardo's the one who ultimately defeats the Shredder, though always with plenty of help. As leader, he is usually the one with a plan. He spends most of his time training his body and mind under his Master Splinter's instruction and follows Bushido, a strict Samurai code of honor and duty. At one point, he even fought and killed a sort of physical embodiment of the Devil. Skill Set Expert strategist Sword master Strong both physically & mentally Serious devotion to training & family Bushido code “He must be powerful if he can defeat that scary thing,” Fluttershy stuttered, feeling scared of the picture of the devil. Boomstick: Giving Keanu Reeves a much needed break! “Don’t know who that is but he sounds like he could be in an action movie!” said Pinkie Pie. mutch to the confusion of her friends. Wiz: However, Leonardo finds it difficult to accept failure. Should things go horribly wrong, his concentration can quickly slip away from him, leaving him sloppy and imprecise. “Accepting defeat can still teach you,” Rarity said, glancing at Applejack. Applejack groaned and said, “You try to do the impossible one time and you’ll never let me live it down.” Boomstick: Leo doesn't like to lose. “Well tough! Even I know I’ll lose one day,” Rainbow Dash said. Showing a surprising amount of maturity that impressed her friends. Leonardo (1987 cartoon version): "Quit clowning you guys! This is serious!" ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ The girls could agree the leonardo was a great warrior but he really needed to let go of all the stress and pressure he puts on himself. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Donatello (*Cues: Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2 (1991) - Cowabunga*) Wiz: Donatello is the brains of the bunch. “So Twilight then?” Rainbow asked, looking at her friend. Boomstick: He does machines! Background: Height: 5'2" Weight: 180 lbs. Master of Ninjitsu & Bojitsu Brains & Technician Favorite Color: Purple Wiz: Right, Boomstick. Somehow, he learned to operate and manipulate both Human and alien technology without any formal education or budget whatsoever. He also speaks 100% fluent Techno-babble. Rainbow grinned and said, “Definitely Twilight.” She was then hit with a pillow by said pony. “I’m not that bad,” Twilight said, looking at her other friends for support but saw that they were looking away from her. “Well not all the time,” she muttered as Pinkie boops her. Donatello: "The resulting intermit multi-polar flux should create the Electromagnetic Pulse!" “Did anypony understand that?” Spike asked, scratching his head as his friends shrugged. Boomstick: What the hell did I just hear? All that gibberish means he's probably trained less than the others, devoting more of his time for Science! “Man~ sounds like one of egghead’s lectures.” groaned out Rainbow Dash. Wiz: Fortunately, his useful Bo Staff makes up for his lack of constant training. Durable Oak and Six feet long, the Bo gives Donatello far more attack range than his other brothers. Bo: 6' long staff Durable Oak Longest reach of all the team's weaponry Rocksteady's worst nightmare “That could help you from staying away from danger,” Twilight said, thinking of the times Shining trained with the guards. Boomstick: The range is nice, but it takes a lot of time and patience to kill anybody with a stick! “I don’t want to know how he knows that,” deadpanned Rarity. Wiz: He's no expert strategist, that's Leonardo's turf, but Donatello's considered the most level-headed of the Turtles. Even with his time spent tinkering, he's still a very capable warrior, easily keeping up with his brothers and even killing the Shredder in an alternate dimension. Skill Set: Level-Headed Bojitsu Master Master Technician & Programmer Rumored I.Q. of 637 Fluent in Techno-Babble Boomstick: An ass-kicking nerd? I don't believe it. “HEY!” yelled Twilight, with puffed cheeks, which caused her friends to laugh at the cute sight. Donatello (2003 cartoon version): "Eh, I'm making this up as I go." ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ The girls had to say that while Donatello had the smarts, he probably wouldn't when with someone like Leo who could out think him in a fight. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Michelangelo (*Cues: TMNT: Turtles in Time - Big Apple, 3 AM*) Wiz: Michelangelo is the youngest of the turtles. He's lazy, undisciplined and easily distracted. He spends his free time playing video games, watching TV, reading comic books and eating pizza. Background: Height: 5'2" Weight: 180 lbs. Master of Ninjitsu, Nunchakus, Oriki-Gusari, & Whirling Pizzas Party Dude Favorite Color: Orange “Sounds like a fun guy,” rainbow dash said, with pinkie and spike nodding in agreement. Boomstick: That turtle is fucked up! Wiz/everyone: What? Boomstick: Come on, you can't tell me that that turtle is not on drugs! “What’s boomstick talking about? He looks fine to me.” commented Rarity, starting to get annoyed at what she considered bullying on the boomsticks part. Wiz: I don't know, I always thought he was dropped as a kid. “That’s a horrible thing to say Mr. Wizard!” gasped out Fluttershy. Boomstick: Okay, look! He has all the signs! Strange eating habits, inability to pay attention, incoherent phrases... Everyone took a side glance at Pinkie Pie, who was eating her weight in cupcakes. Wiz: Moving on, his weapon of choice... Boomstick: The bong! “What?” everyone said at the exact same time, wondering what the item was. Wiz: No, the Nunchaku, isn't really a weapon at all. It's a farming tool for threshing grain. These "weapons" are unnecessarily overcomplicated clubs with the effectiveness of a tattered flyswatter. Yet SOMEHOW, Michelangelo has been able to blunder his way through fights to victories he really doesn't deserve! “Are they really undermining the poor fella’s victory’s!?” yelled Applejack. Getting real sick of the two host uncalled hatred for the poor turtle. Nunchucks: Also called 'Nunchakus' Overcomplicated Looks Cool? Maybe? Farming Tool Good for strangling Obviously, Mikey strangles foes off-screen Boomstick: He even beat Raph once. “Well that’s an accomplishment right there,” Twilight said, happy to know the orange masked turtle has a victory under his belt. “Ya! You jerks can at least give him that!” yelled spike. Wiz: Sure, I get it, swing chuks around gives him momentum to hit with them, blah, blah, blah, but in the end, a baseball bat will give you the same effect and more with much less effort. Seriously, who came up with these things? They're preposterous! “They look useful,” Rainbow grumbled as she crossed her hooves. “Ya and I bet there’s a great man out there who could use them!” added Applejack. “COUGH!!BRUCE LEE!COUGH!!” "coughed" Pinkie Pie. Boomstick: You're prepostemous! “And he's insulting Michelangelo's intelligence?” deadpanned Twilight. Wiz: And, for some reason, in all his infinite wisdom, the great master Splinter gave the most complicated weapon to the retard of the group. WHY? “Why are they bullying Mikey?” Fluttershy asked, not seeing anything wrong with the turtle. Sure he wasn’t the brightest but that didn’t give the hosts the right to bash him. Boomstick: Mikey's not gonna win this fight, is he? Wiz: He'd better not. “Whats with all the hate!?” screamed Rarity. Michelangelo (2007 movie version): "Ho ho, someone's cranky!" ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ The group could agree no matter what, Michelangelo would be a great warrior. No matter what some people say. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Raphael (*Cues: I Beam Fight - TMNT*) Boomstick: Raph is cool but crude! Hell, forget crude, this guy's borderline psycho! Wiz: Sure to throw the first punch, Raphael is certainly the most vicious of the team. He's constantly butting heads with the others and challenging Leonardo's leadership. Background: Height:5'2" Weight: 180 lbs. Master of Ninjistu & Sais Hot-Tempered brawn Favorite Color: Red Everyone in the room looked at Rainbow when Wiz said the first line. Feeling everyone’s eyes on her, Rainbow Dash said, “I don’t do that.” “You accused me of being a spy, hit a dragon the first chance you got and rushed into many other situations without a plan,” Twilight deadpanned as everyone agreed. Boomstick: He uses twin Sai, which is like a combination of a pitchfork, dagger and Wolverine's claws! Sai: Dagger-like truncheon Used against swords Primarily offensive Traps & controls an opponent's weapons For stabbing, not slicing “This wolverine guy sounds awesome!” Rainbow dash said. “I would like to see him in an episode,” commented Pinkie Pie. Wiz: Like the nunchuk, they also humbly began as a farming tool but were re-evaluated to counter the oppressive samurai. “Wow, so the farmers used a simple tool as a weapon?” Twilight exclaimed, wondering if other farming equipment could be used as a weapon “So wait, they give this guy a free pass on his weapons but not Mikey?” asked a confused Spike. Boomstick: They're best used as a close ranged defensive weapon. The triple prongs are designed to block, trap and control an opponent's weapon, while using the pummel to beat the enemy into submission. Raph's Sai can even snap swords! “That quite the weapon to be used in different ways,” Rarity said, amazed by the versatility of the weapon. “I’d use them,” Rainbow said, liking the snapping swords part. Wiz: Raphael is not exactly the smartest fighter, usually rushing into a brawl without a plan and just overpowering a foe. Because of this, Raphael spends much of his time honing his combat skills. It is very likely he is physically the strongest turtle. Skill Set: Vicious & Brutal Sai Master Arguably the toughest of the team Hot-headed with common fits of rage Enjoys fighting Boomstick: Also, this guy's in some serious need of anger management! “Oh?” everyone questioned. Wiz: He is naturally hot-headed and sometimes loses control of his rage. He is much more vicious than the other turtles and, at one point in the comics, even became the Shredder himself. “Ok I’ll at least admit that Dash would never do that,” Applejack said. She could never see her friend turning into one of their enemies. Raphael (90s movie version): "Damn!" Wiz: Alright the combatants are set. Let's end this debate once and for all. Boomstick: Wait a minute, Wiz, I gotta rent the latest Ninja Turtles game first. Wiz: We've have it, we just did all this research with it. Boomstick: Gamefly! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ As the trailer played out the group had to admit that they couldn’t choose a side for this one. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Boomstick: It's time for a Death Battle! Death Battle (*Cues: 1987 TMNT Sewer BGM*) In the sewers of New York, the turtles face each other and they draw their weapons. “I have a bad feeling about this,” squicked out Fluttershy. FIGHT! (*Cues: Unknown Theme*) Leonardo goes after Michelangelo and both trade blow for blow. Meanwhile, Donatello faces Raphael and Leo backflips past them. As Michelangelo attacks him, Leo stabs him with his swords, then leaps over him and slices off his arm, followed by his head. “Oh sweet celestia!” cried out a green face Spike (*Cues: Mouser Arsenal - TMNT 2K3 Game*) Don and Raph continue fighting. Both seem evenly matched until Don throws Raph past Leo. Leo tries to attack Don, but Don leaps on a stack of crates and begins hitting Leo in the head with his staff. “That's a smart plan,” commented Twilight (*Cues: Stars Align - TMNT*) Raph gets up and knocks the crates down, sending Don flying backwards onto the floor. Raph proceeds to stab Don with his sai 24 times. For lands sakes he’s your brother!!” cried Applejack. Unable to handle seeing a family literally tear each other apart. He then faces Leo, They both fight each other and Raph knocks Leo into the water. As Leo resurfaces, Raph jumps into the water. They both trade blows with their weapons. Both seem to be at a stalemate until Raph catches Leo's swords with his sais. Eventually, the sais break Leo's sword and then both stab the other. Raph, however, is stabbed in the throat while Leo's wound isn't fatal. Raphael: DAMN! Raphael falls below the surface of the water, which is coloured red by his blood. Leo sits down in the water and looks at the sai in his body. K.O.! Results (*Cues: Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (1987) - Main Theme (Rock/Metal Cover)*) Boomstick: Woah ho ho! Somebody call an ambulance! Or a vet, I don't know. “Not funny,” a downtrodden Pinkie Pie muttered out Wiz: There is a reason why Leonardo is the leader of the team. Not for strength or speed, but for strategy. Leonardo understands the strengths and weaknesses of the other turtles. His biggest threat was Raphael's sword snapping Sai, so he attacked the weakest of the group first. “Poor Mikey…” whimpered out fluttershy. Boomstick: This means Leo let Donny beat the hell outta Raph, who couldn't compete with Don's range. By the time Raph got his revenge, Leo was in way better shape for the final duel. “A cunning strategy,” Twilight said, she didn’t like it but it still was well thought out. Wiz: And I can hear all the fanboys raging "But Raph won in the movie! He should win here! Nyah nyah!" No! Four reasons. One: The result of the fight was specifically plot constructive, which is rarely accurate. Two: Leonardo absolutely decimated Raph in the fist fight beforehand. Three: Leonardo didn't want to fight at all. If he did, he would've killed Raphael right here. “Unlike now,” muttered Rainbow dash, with a downward glance. Boomstick: Tilt the blade, slide left, bam, no more Raph! Wiz: And four; That whole movie doesn't make much sense to begin with. Why should this? “True,” agreed everyone else. Boomstick: But, hey, Leo can still die from that stab, right? Wiz: Doubtful for several reasons. Turtles proportionally have smaller vital organs and far more muscle mass than humans, meaning there's little chance Raphael actually hit anything important. Leo's actually been stabbed plenty of times in the series and walked away, and all four turtles have been trained in Chi Kung and can control their breathing and heart rate to survive extreme conditions. “I guess since he’s technically a turtle his animal biology still stayed the same after they mutated,” Twilight said a bit uncertainly. Fluttershy even agreed as there wasn’t anything to suggest otherwise. Boomstick: Looks like Leo got the point of this battle. No one could even muster a reaction from that joke. It was just in poor taste. Wiz: The winner is Leonardo. END! Boomstick: Next time on Death Battle. Leo may taste victory now, but the fight is just beginning. The girls were curious that Leo was gonna fight someone else this time. His opponent appears to be some large anthropomorphic toad/frog. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ As soon as the credits started to play, twilight hit the power button, leaving the room in a awkward silence. “Um, that was nice. But i need to go back home and take care of my animal friends. And I need to pack my saddlebags,” Fluttershy quiety said as she walked towards Twilight’s front door. She felt that she should spend more time with her family, especially her younger brother. “Ya A’H think I'll head back to the farm and give Big Mack a break on the choirs, just so he and I can spend time with Apple Bloom,” muttered out applejack, as she made her way out the door. “Come Spike, I think we need to start writing some letters and when we're done we can go out for some ice cream,” suggested Twilight. Getting a slow nod from her little brother/son in all but blood, as they made their way towards the library wing of the castle. Planing on sending more leaders to her brother and sister for now on. The rest of the group also left with thoughts of spending time with their sibling’s on their minds. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ CHAPTER END! NEXT TIME ZITz VS. LEONARDO!
Zitz VS LeonardoThe next day everyone met back up in the ballroom determine not to let last episode to ruin the fun that they were having and to not let it keep their moods down. “All right girls! are you ready to give this show another chance?” asked Twilight as she got everything set up for another marathon of death battle. “YEAH!” was the group agreement of her friends. With no further delay and with the encouragement of her friends, Twilight quickly hit play and sat back with her friends to enjoy the show. Interlude (*Cues: Invader - Jim Johnston*) Boomstick: Last time on Death Battle, the Ninja Turtles battled to find the deadliest of the team, and good old Leo used cunning strategy and swordplay to come out on top. “But the cost was too great,” muttered everyone. Wiz: But the fight isn't over yet. Leonardo must face his most powerful imitator, Zitz, the leader of the mighty Battletoads. “Now that's an odd name,” commented Spike. “Though not as crazy as Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles,” countered Twilight. Getting a nod from her dragon assistant. Boomstick: He's Wiz and I'm Boomstick. Wiz: And it's our job to analyze their weapons, armor, and skills to find out who would win a death battle. Zitz (*Cues: Battletoads & Double Dragon - Main Title*) Wiz: Zitz was computer engineered as one of three ultimate amphibian warriors in a gladitorial video game reality show called Battletoads. This accidentally opened a dimensional gateway to another galaxy. Every time the game began, the galaxy became the battletoad arena for their superhero war against the Dark Queen and they… “I’m getting confused,” Pinkie said while holding her head in her hooves. “Same here, sugarcube,” Applejack said getting a bit of a headache from the explanation. Boomstick: Whoa, whoa, whoa, what? “Even I’m confused,” Twilight said, not fully understanding what Wiz said. Wiz: Three nerds made a video game, got sucked through it into another galaxy, and became toad superheroes. “Ok that’s easier to understand,” Rarity said, now understanding the story. Boomstick: Yeah, got it! “Me too!” Agreed Pinkie Pie. Wiz: Zitz was originally colored yellow, to differentiate him from Rash, but he is now officially a blue-green hue. He leads the Battletoad team with a laid back yet strategic attitude. Background: Real Name: Morgan Ziegier Height: 6'8" Weight: 196 lbs. Leader & Strategist Superhuman Strength Was originally yellow, but is now blue-green “Why change his colors?” Rainbow asked, not seeing anything wrong with being yellow. “Who knows? I’m wondering how he can lead a team as a strategist with a lazy attitude,” Spike wondered. Boomstick: He chooses to go with my personal favorite battle strategy: “Boomstick has a battle strategy?” questioned a surprised Twilight along with an equally stunned group. (*Cues: Battletoads in Battlemaniacs - Ragnarok Canyon*) Boomstick: beat the shit out of everything that moves! And as a Battletoad, Zitz can shape shift his body into various weaponry: Giant fists, heavy weights, ram horns, you name it. “Of course,” Twilight facepalmed as the rest of her friends laughed. Wiz: Unlike his teammates, Zitz has used his inventive genius to mechanically advance his weaponry far beyond those of his fellow toads. By combining technology and brawn, Zitz has added blades, saws and drills to his arsenal. Shape-Shifting: Can transform body into weaponry Giant fists, boots, horns, hammers, weights, etc. Technologically Advanced Added drills, blades, saws. spikes, & dozers “Well at least he’s smart enough to improve his arsenal,” commented Rarity. “And their transformation is better than that Shang guy’s,” Rainbow said as everyone agreed with that. Boomstick: This guy could be the world's best handyman, if he always wasn't getting sucked into an alternate dimension every time someone turned on a video game. “That must be really inconvenient,” Fluttershy said. Wiz: Despite almost having no actual combat training, Zitz has proved strong enough to power through some of the toughest games ever made. And yes, the games excruciating difficulty is canon as it was specifically programmed by the Battletoads themselves. “Huh?” everyone said, wondering how that’s possible. Boomstick: Yeah, try and wrap your brain around that one. “Trying to… not working out so well,” muttered Pinkie Pie, getting a headache from thinking too much. Zitz: I'm a big bad mother of all toads! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ The group had to say even though Zitz was pretty strange, he at least had a really good chance of winning. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Leonardo (*Cues: Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (1987) - Main Theme (Rock/Metal Cover)*) Wiz: We briefly covered his abilities last episode, but there's plenty more to Leonardo. He's trained in Ninjitsu and Bushido all his life, shaping his body and mind to master close combat, swordsmanship, honor and the art of invisibility. “At least they’re not being lazy with this,” Twilight said, glad they weren’t going to repeat the same things from the last episode. Boomstick: He's also the strategist of the turtle team, who are now all dead. Sooo... yeah. Background Height: 5'2" Weight: 180 lbs. Master of Ninjitsu, Bushido, & Swordsmanship Leader and Strategist Skilled in using Environment Favorite Color: Blue. Duh. “Don’t remind us,” muttered a sadden Rarity. Getting some nods of agreement from her friends. Wiz: Leonardo is especially skilled in use of environment to outsmart and outmaneuver an opponent. He is also the only Ninja Turtle in any timeline who has studied under two masters, Splinter the rat, and the Ancient one. “He’s really is starting to sound like you Twilight,” Spike realised. Boomstick: Hey Wiz, look! It's an Asian Yoda! What? Leo wields two Ninjaken swords, which are best for swift deadly strikes and are designed with the idea that a good offense, is the best defense. They're usually mistaken as katana in the shows and comics, even though they are obviously straight, rather than curved. Ninjaken Also called Ninjato Shorter and Straighter than Katanas Designed for Quick, Deadly Strikes 2 Ft. Long Blade A Hollywood Invention Wiz: The Ninjaken is, in fact, an invention of Hollywood, as there is no historical evidence of the weapon's existence. “That weird,” Spike said. “Almost every weapon has some kind of history to it.” “Did you get that one from one of your comic’s?” teased Rainbow Dash. “No, we have a book or two on weapons and their uses in the library,” Spike said, making Rainbow shut her mouth and lightly glare at the dragon. Boomstick: Like the moon landing! “They’ve landed on their moon!?” gasped out Twilight. Wiz: Shut up! While he usually relies on his brothers' solid teamwork, he has proven to be a very effective warrior on his own too, defeating all sorts of enemies like ninja robots, giant monsters, war-torn aliens and even the Shredder. “He truly is a great warrior,” admitted Twilight as everyone agreed with her. Leonardo: (swiping his sword at a foot ninja) Gotcha. (then kicks the foot ninja) Wiz: Alright the combatants are set. Let’s end this debate once and for all. Boomstick: But first, our shameless advertisement from our friends “go” ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ As the ads started to play, everyone was quick to choose a team. On team Zitz was Spike, Pinkie and Applejack. And on leo’s team was Twilight, Rainbow, and Rarity. Fluttershy was going to be neutral on this one. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Death Battle Zitz jumps over a wire fence and walks forward as Leonardo jumps out of the sewer. Zitz turns to face his opponent. “Go Leo!” cheered Rainbow Dash. FIGHT! Zitz uses his ram horns to knock Leonardo into the fence and, as Leo bounces off, Zitz kicks him with an iron boot and then punches him away with a giant fist. Leo recovers just in time to avoid Zitz' drill attack and kicks him twice, only to get countered by a giant fist and a spiked wall. After pummeling Leo some more, Zitz throws him towards the wire fence, “Man Zitz isn't letting up!” gasped Applejack. (*Cues: I Beam Fight - TMNT*) only for Leo to flip onto his feet and defend himself from Zitz' giant fist. Leo hits Zitz twice and stabs him once, but Zitz turns into a weight to defend himself from Leo's swords. Eventually, Leo jumps into the sewer as Zitz returns to his normal form and jumps into the sewer. “He’s now in Leo’s home turf,” said Rainbow Dash. seeing that her fighter now had the home field advantage. (*Cues: Battletoads & Double Dragon - Next Level (Remix)*) As Zitz scouts around for Leo, the turtle jumps out of a hole in the wall, stabs Zitz with his sword and jumps away. Leo tries this again, but Zitz grows a chainsaw tail, which Leo dodges. Zitz gives chase and finds that Leo has disappeared. Leo jumps out of the wall and hurts Zitz. Enraged, Zitz attacks the wall that Leo jumps back into through the hole. This distraction allows Leo to swim through the water and then slice Zitz in half. “Ouch!” hissed out Rarity as she could almost feel that last one. K.O.! Results (*Cues: Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (1987) - Season 8-10 Closing Credits Theme*) Boomstick: Damn. “Ya got that right, partner,” Applejack muttered to herself. Wiz: Zitz was more than a match for Leonardo in a simple brawl, using his brutal arsenal to overpower him; But when it came to using the environment, Zitz couldn't handle Leonardo's ninja skills and his lack of training left him frustrated and unsure of what to do. “This is why ninjas are awesome. I hope we’ll get an episode on ninjas,” Rainbow yelled while pumping her hooves up in the air. “That would be super awesome. Maybe they could have magic and animal helpers,” Pinkie said, bouncing around as if the floor was a trampoline. Boomstick: While Zitz is a strategist, he always relies on his brute force and once Leo went in stealth mode and turned the tides, Zitz decided to just bring the whole sewer down. Hey, c'mon, Leo fights all kinds of mutants and monsters at least once a week. “Really? I wonder what else Leo fights,” Spike said, trying to picture the blue masked turtle fight all sorts of monsters. Wiz: Of all the toads, Zitz certainly stood the best chance with his technologically advanced weaponry, but while the Battletoads are known for accomplishing impossible odds, so are the Ninja Turtles. Leonardo made quick work of Zitz as soon as he had the chance. “Strategy and cunning wins over a short temper and brute force,” commented Twilight. Boomstick: In the end, Zitz just needed to pull himself together. "Tee hee!" giggled Pinkie Pinkie Pie Wiz: The Winner is Leonardo. Boomstick: Again. END. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Boomstick: Next time on Death Battle! The girls see a cartoonish looking Green dinosaur standing next to a giant green Pipe. “Awww~ how cute!” coed Fluttershy. But suddenly a vicious Raptor jumps out of the Pipe and roars at the poor creature, who could only whimper and curl up in fear. “Oh my gosh!!” screamed Pinkie Pie, as she grabbed the controller from Twilight’s magical grip. “Hey!” protested said mare in anger. “No time! NEXT EPISODE NOW!” yelled the party mare as she hit play. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ CHAPTER END! NEXT TIME, YOSHI VS. RIPTORE!
Yoshi VS RiptorAfter the exciting episode of Leonardo and Zitz, we find our heroes in- “NO TIME FOR AN INTRO MR. NARRATOR!!” Pinkie Pie screamed, pressing play on the remote she took from Twilight. Wait what!? NO DON’T YOU DA-!! Interlude (*Cues: Invader - Jim Johnston*) Boomstick: Who doesn't like dinosaurs? No one, cause they're awesome? Wiz: Like Yoshi, Mario's happy-go-lucky steed… “So adorable,” Fluttershy said, gushing at the cute little dinosaur. Boomstick: ... and Riptor, the Dino Warrior with a Killer Instinct. “Now that’s a beast right there,” Rainbow said as Applejack and Spike nodded in agreement. Spike started to imagine himself looking like Riptor and saving Rarity. Wiz: I'm Wizard and he's Boomstick and it's our job to analyze their weapons, armor, and skills to find out who would win a Death Battle. Yoshi (*Cues: Yoshi's Island - Flower Garden Theme*) Wiz: Yoshi is a cheerful and friendly dinosaur whose race happens to be among Bowser's most hated enemies. Why? Fluttershy raised her hoof and shyly said, “Cause they're happy?” Boomstick: 'Cause they're so Goddamn happy all the time! “Hooray for happiness,” Pinkie said, waving her hooves in the air. Everyone laughed or giggled at Pinkie’s little cheer. Wiz: Yoshi is considered one of the fastest characters in the Mario universe and has a higher and stronger jump than Mario. Despite his cute and cheery demeanor, Yoshi's powerful enough to put down this goliath single-handedly. He's able to keep up with experienced fighters like Solid Snake, Link, and even previous Death Battle champion, Samus Aran. Background: Bowser's first nemesis High, strong jumps Can resist knock-back Naturally skilled in basic combat & speed Constantly followed by incredibly happy music “I doubt it,” Applejack said, thinking the critter won't last long against the giant dinosaur. “Hush, Applejack. We should see what they can do before passing judgment,” Rarity said, making her farmer friend roll her eyes. Boomstick: And either he doesn't have any ears or he's really freaken' patient, 'cause he somehow put up with that whiny-ass Baby Mario! “Awww,” everypony said as Spike pretended to gag. Baby Mario cries. “That is pretty annoying,” Spike said, not liking the baby's screech. “SPIKE. It's only a baby and it's only natural that they cry to tell us what's wrong,” Twilight said, a bit disappointed to hear her son/brother say something like that. “Sorry,” muttered Spike. Boomstick: If it were me, someone would've found him in a dumpster after the first level! Also ,while young Yoshis are dumb enough to run off cliffs, they learn quickly over time, eventually driving go-karts, playing sports and surviving the greatest death trap ever created: Mario Party! “Who in their right mind would want to attend that party?” Rarity asked, seeing some of the dangerous games being played. “Now that’s my kind of party,” Rainbow said, thinking that she and Applejack could use that for the next Iron Pony Competition. “Wonder if I should make a party like that?” Pinkie said, watching all the games closely. She's always up for new games to use during the parties she plans. Wiz: Yoshi has a large arsenal of eggs to use as lightweight projectiles and can even create a giant egg shell to use as an all-encompassing shield. Boomstick: What is it with creatures from the Mario universe using their babies as weapons? Is it that effective? I'm gonna have to test this out. Maybe some sort of Baby Launcher… Yoshi Eggs: Maneuverable Projectiles Light-Weight Can carry up to 6 eggs Different eggs create different effects Made from the souls of devoured enemies “WHAT?” everyone yelled, including Spike. “What’s with the people of that world and using their babies for battle!?” screamed Twilight in total disgust. Wiz: Boomstick! That's a terrible idea! Any time you'd want to reload, you'd have to wait nine months. Anyway, Yoshi's greatest asset is his stomach. “Wiz just lost some of my respect,” Rarity said emotionlessly, appalled at the idea of the launcher. “Though I am interested in what's so special about the little guy’s stomach,” Applejack muttered. Boomstick: Yeah, Yoshi's got a bad eating problem, and devours everything in sight with his long stretchy tongue. He can swallow almost anything, even fire. “Wow, and I thought I had a huge appetite,” Pinkie said, amazed at Yoshi's ability to eat almost anything. “And that’s saying something,”snarked Rainbow Dash. Wiz: That's right, Boomstick. Yoshi has the strangest digestive system I've ever come across. Certain meals can grant him special abilities. Otherwise, after consuming a foe or item, Yoshi...uh...ejects an egg spawned from the subject. The egg may have special properties from said object, or contain the victim within. Digestive System: Long, stretchy tongue Can eat almost anything Can get special abilities or produce eggs Can trap enemies in eggs Has Trouble swallowing Koopa Shells “H-how is that possible?” asked a confused Twilight. Boomstick: Wait, is that how he makes eggs?! Are there any female Yoshis? “That’s… a very good question,” admitted Spike. Wiz: I don't think they're male or female. Yoshis may be asexual. Boomstick: That poor miserable creature. “I’ll say…” muttered the young drake. Yoshi: "Oh ho ho, Yoshi got right stuff!" ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ While Yoshi might not win and the group had some issues with how his kind did with their kids, the group had to agree with Fluttershy. Yoshi was freaking cute. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Riptor (*Cues: Riptor's Theme - Killer Instinct*) Wiz: Riptor was genetically engineered by Ultratech to be the perfect combination of human intelligence and animal brutality. Background Height: 7' Weight: 700 lbs. Genetically Engineered Designed to be smart & Vicious, but backfired Only 4 years old, so has little combat training “Why would someone make such a monster?” gasped out Rarity. Boomstick: His tools of death are his teeth, claws and impaling tail and he knows how to use them well, pulling off insanely bloody combos. And when he's not fighting up close, he can spit a fiery acid! Combat Teeth, claws, & tail Fiery acid projectile Rushes opponents w/combos “Ok, I wouldn't want to fight that thing,” Rainbow said, holding her hooves up protectively. “Same here,” Applejack said, knowing a fight between her and this critter would end badly for her. Wiz: Riptor's only 4 years old and yet, already, he's a nearly unstoppable killing machine. Boomstick: That's one ass kicking toddler! “IT’S A BABY!?” everyone screamed, completely terrified. Wiz: He has reached a point where his human emotion and reasoning conflict with his predatory instincts, often confusing him to the blind point of rage and aggression. “So he becomes nothing but a living killing machine,” stated Twilight. Boomstick: Riptor may look, sound and act like a Velociraptor, but he's really something else entirely. He's twice as big and twice as slow and I don't think Velociraptors could shoot acid. They were awesome enough without it! With a limited amount of combat training, Riptor relies on his Raptor instincts in a fight. Raptors were pack hunters, preferring to plague their victims with stealth, speed and secrecy, though they were no pushovers by themselves. On their own, they usually just rush their opponent and overpower them with ultra combos, and if "Jurassic Park" has taught us anything, it's that Raptors are clever sons of bitches! Velociraptor Instincts Brutal & cunning First incapacitates victims Hunted in packs Stealthy Alone, they rushed & overpowered opponents The group was speechless at Boomstick’s little lesson on velociraptors. “And here i thought he wasn’t educated at all,” Rarity said, trying to process the idea of Boomstick saying something smart. “I guess even he knows a thing or two,” Applejack said, nodding dumbly at this point. Wiz: Wow, Boomstick, I didn't know you knew so much about dinosaurs. “Us too,” Spike said, still shocked at Boomstick’s speech. Boomstick: Yeah, I always wanted me a pet Raptor. I was gonna call him Barney after I found out what irony was. “Oh poor Boomstick just wanted a animal friend,” whimpered Fluttershy. Killer instinct announcer: "Supreme victory!" Riptor feasts on the remains of her prey. Wiz: Alright the combatants are set let's end this debate once and for all. Boomstick: First I need to get some money to convert my Kitten Cannon into a Baby Launcher. “Don’t you dare!” Fluttershy growled out, surprising her friends. Wiz: You've got to be kidding me. Boomstick: from Squarespace, who doesn't who necessarily has Baby Launchers. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ As the AD’s played out the girls and one drake were quick to form their teams. On team Yoshi: Fluttershy, Pinkie Pie, and Twilight. And on team Riptor: Rainbow Dash, Applejack, Rarity, and Spike. Now that the teams were set everyone went back to watching the TV right when the trailer just ended. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Boomstick: Right now, It's time for a Death Battle…ahem. Death Battle (*Cues: Overworld Theme - Super Mario World*) Yoshi is happily dancing when Riptor emerges from a pipe and roars, scaring Yoshi, who begins cowering. “Yoshi NO!” cried out a terrified Fluttershy. FIGHT! (*Cues: Yoshi's Island Theme - Super Smash Brothers Melee*) Riptor begins by attacking Yoshi repeatedly and knocking him back. Announcer: AWESOME COMBO! “WHOOO! Look at Riptor go!” cheered Rainbow Dash. As Riptor advances, Yoshi throws three eggs at her, but these do very little. Yoshi then forces out a large egg and throws it at Riptor, causing a baby Yoshi to appear. Baby Yoshi: Yoshi! Riptor attacks the baby Yoshi and bites its head off. “NOOOOO!!” everyone cried out. Yoshi screams and runs off but is stopped by a Koopa Troopa. He eats the Koopa Troopa and spits him at Riptor, who deflects it but Yoshi protects himself with his egg shield. Riptor attacks the shield until it breaks and then proceeds to attack Yoshi some more, only for Yoshi to counter. Announcer: C-C-C-C-COMBO BREAKER! “Yay! Yoshi!!” Pinkie Pie cheered, waving around some green Pom-Poms. Yoshi Ground Pounds Riptor who spits acid at him but Yoshi eats the acid and traps it in an egg. He then throws the egg at Riptor, covering her face with acid. Riptor roars in pain and tries to attack Yoshi again but Yoshi eats her and forces her out as a giant egg. As the egg falls off the cliff which Yoshi is standing next to, Riptor manages to break free, but all too late. Riptor falls down into a pink car with flame patterns on it with only her legs sticking out. K.O.! Results (*Cues: Alpina Blue - Yoshi's Story*) Boomstick: NOOO, my car! “BWAHAHAHAHA!!” laughed Rainbow Dash, along with everyone else. Wiz: Yoshi couldn't compete with Riptor's tough and brutal viciousness, but his varied arsenal ultimately produced a winning move. “Sometimes the most random of abilities can be the key to victory,” lectured Twilight. Boomstick: Riptor's a friggin' beast in a fist fight but while Yoshi looks all cute and stuff, he's actually a deadly devouring machine, like my ex-wife! “It’s not very gentlemanly to talk about a lady like that,” muttered Rarity. Wiz: That raptor mind of Riptor's might be cunning and clever but tooth and claw can only accomplish so much. Yoshi's bizarre digestive system rebounded the acid spit, blinding Riptor and leaving him vulnerable. “And also leaving the poor guy in excruciating pain,” added in Applejack. Boomstick: Riptor may be smart but Yoshi can drive cars and show me another dinosaur who can do that! “Challenge accepted!” declared Pinkie Pie. Wiz: Even with a velociraptor's strong sense of hearing and smell, Riptor's confused and vengeful mind wasn't able to process the change of tactics fast enough. Even so, he was already finished. “Oh?” everyone wondered. Boomstick: Even if that conveniently placed cliff hadn't had been there, Riptor would have lost his whole face pretty quick to the acid. He just didn't have the stomach for this dino - mite Dino - Fight. Everyone groaned at that joke. Wiz: What? Boomstick: I'm clever! “Agreed!” laughed Pinkie Pie. Wiz: The winner is Yoshi. END ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Boomstick: Next time on Death Battle. In the darkness they see a female figure. She… looks like a cat? The cat girl is standing there with her back turned. She has thick blue hair with white streaks and has white cat ears poking out of the hair. Her eyes are emerald green and has a white cat tail. The most weird feature is that she's was not wearing any clothes and is bare skin but has white fur in swirling patterns on her back, stomach, lower abdomen and breasts. Her entire forearms, hands, legs and feet are completely covered in fur and where large for her body. Then they see another figure but not much. A hoodie wearing girl who also has cat ears but her face under her hood has a sharp toothy smile and red eyes that sparkled with a weird mix bloodlust and innocents. The Cat Girl turns to the audience. Cat Girl: Meow! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ “Umm could we start the next episode right now?” asked a red face Spike, trying to act like he wasn’t really as interested as he actually was. The girls could only giggle at the young drake’s attempt to playing cool, resulting in Spike’s blush to grow even brighter almost making his head look like a cherry. Feeling like her number one assistant was embarrassed enough as it is, decided to hit play and spare him anymore embarrassment. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ CHAPTER END! NEXT TIME Felicia VS Taokaka
Felicia VS TaokakaWe see our group of watchers seated in front of the television, preparing to finish the finale episode of the day. “Sorry but we're skipping this intro as well,” interrupted Pinkie Pie yet again. Wait what!? NO, NOT AGAIN YOU LITTLE PINK SH- Interlude (*Cues: Invader - Jim Johnston*) Boomstick: Catfight! “Oh dear celestia,” muttered Rarity. Wiz: It literally is Boomstick. Not only do we have two ferocious females in the ring today, but they're also, well, cats. Boomstick: Felicia, the popstar demon cat chick lady. “A demon?” Twilight questioned. Wiz: And Taokaka, BlazBlue's speedy vigilante. Boomstick: He´s Wiz and I´m Boomstick... Wiz: And it´s our job to analyze their weapons, armour and skills to find out who would win a DEATH BATTLE. Felicia (*Cues: Felicia's Theme - Marvel vs Capcom 3*) Wiz: As a catwoman, Felicia faced discrimination all her life. She was raised by a nun and became a successful pop-star, a passion that would ultimately lead her on a quest to bring humans and cat-people together to make children happy. Background: Height: 5'6" Weight: 128 lbs. Raised by a nun Happy-Go-Lucky attitude Superhuman Strength, Speed, & Endurance “She wants to have her kind accepted?” Twilight said, impressed by the cat-woman’s goal. “And she just wants to make children happy,” Fluttershy quietly said, wishing she could meet her. “That’s a noble goal for her,” Rarity said, dabbing a handkerchief under her eyes. Hearing about Felicia’s goals brought some tears to her eyes. Boomstick: What the hell? I thought we were talking about a deadly demon warrior and... is she naked?! This gave the girls and dragon something to think about. Is she classified as naked. Wiz: Yes. “Ok?” Rainbow said, unsure what else to say. Boomstick: But, she's a cat. “Is he going were I think he’s going?” Rarity asked, feeling very uncomfortable. Wiz: Yes… “We know that. Is Boomstick trying to go somewhere with this?” Applejack said, trying to understand Boomstick’s questions. Boomstick: Hmmm... do you think it'd be wrong to- “OH good god, Boomstick!” Twilight screamed as she covered Spike ears. Much too young drakes annoyance Wiz: Yes! Felicia is a Darkstalker, a creature of the night, and naturally possesses supernatural strength, speed and agility. She can also use her unique cat senses to sniff out enemies from extreme distances. “She sure beats wynona's nose,” commented Applejack. Boomstick: She can tear into her foes with the sharp claws restin' in her big-ass paws, each several inches long and capable of tearing through all kinds of armor. “Those would cause some damage,” Rainbow said, eyeing those long pink nails. “She must take very special care of her nails,” Rarity said, wondering what products she uses if any at all. Wiz: To top it off her tail is extremely strong, able to lift her entire body on its own. She's undeniably one of the faster darkstalkers, and can get around the battlefield with her unpredictable Rolling Smash, Delta Kicks and Rolling Buckler. Combat: Long, Pink Claws Strong Tail Speed-Based Combo High-Damaging Grapples Can charge Energy at will Natural Athlete Special Moves: Rolling Smash Delta Kick/Cat Spike Hell Cat Grapple Rolling Buckler Links to Various Attacks Sandsplash: Short Range Low-Middle Height Also called Litter Box Kick “Ah ya! Speed for the win!” cheered Rainbow Dash, voice full of pride. Boomstick (Singing): Felicia... she can really move... Felicia... she's got an attitu-ude- (*Cues: Night Warriors Darkstalker' Revenge: The Animated Series - Intro Theme Instrumental*) Wiz: Yes Boomstick, we get it, she's like Sonic. Anyway, as a darkstalker, Felicia has a natural affinity for magic, able to use it in the form of her only ranged attack: kicking sand “Kicking sand… really?” Deadpanned Twilight. “I wanna know who this Sonic dude is,” said Rainbow Dash. wondering why the name struck a chord with her. Boomstick: At least she's litter box trained “Is that a racist remark?” Rainbow asked her knowledgable friend. Twilight simply shrugged her shoulders, unsure of the answer to that. Wiz: As she was raised by a nun, even becoming one herself, she has little to no combat training, preferring to focus on her singing career and running an orphanage. As such, she relies on her lethal feral instincts in a fight. “That could lead her to losing this match.” remarked Applejack. Boomstick: But these same instincts also lead her to be easily distracted by ferocious enemies like butterflies, rolling balls of yarn and paper that crinkles. “That’s really sad ….Oh a bit,” Pinkie said, reaching for the shiny bit on the floor. Wiz: The other darkstalkers consider Felicia to be one of the weakest of their kind, but with the help from her friends, she somehow manages to hold her own against demon lords, spell casters and all-powerful aliens. “That’s quite the list she’s got there,” Rarity exclaimed, liking that the cat-woman wasn’t some push over. Boomstick: That's one cat you don't want to cross. Felicia: I sure could use a catnap. Felicia then turns into her cat form. “Awww kitty!” cooed Fluttershy. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ The group had to admit that Felicia was a good person and a strong warrior. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Taokaka (*Cues: Catus Carnival - BlazBlue Calamity Trigger*) Boomstick: That chick wearing a cat hoodie? “Looks like it to me,” Rainbow said, taking a bite out of a cupcake. Wiz: No, that's a special cloak to fit her Kaka body. “Cough cough,” Rainbow started to choke on her cupcake as Applejack slapped her back. The hit caused Rainbow to cough up the cupcakes as she said, “WHAT!” Boomstick: Her what body? Wiz: Taokaka is a vigilante of the Kaka tribe, a catlike people descended from genetically engineered living weapons. Her genetics, provide her with a natural fighting instinct. She is the guardian of the Kaka, implying that she is the best fighter of the group. Background: Height: 5'5" Weight: 93 lbs. Descended from Genetically Engineered Weapons Guardian & Vigilante Incredibly Stupid “Well it’s good that she uses her strength for her home and her people,” said Twilight. Boomstick: While she may be a good fighter, she's one dumb cat. “What?” everyone questioned, confused with boomsticks remark. Wiz: Unfortunately, Tao has an incredibly severe case of ADHD. While she hunts bounties with the intent of improving her fighting skill and bringing money to her family, she often winds up completely forgetting about her mission at the worst of times, often even befriending her would-be targets. Everyone facepalmed at the tidbit of information. Boomstick: She has twelve retractable dual-edged blades on her hands and feet. While they´re not very long, they can transform from basic claws to hook-size and saw-blades. Damn, I don´t even want to think what those things would do to my couch. Combat: Total of 12 Retractable Razor-Sharp Blades Speed-Based Combos Expert Air Control 'Dancing Edge' Drive is Extremely Fast Seithr: Uses Instinctively Uses for Special Attacks 3 Powerful Fast, Distortion Drives Astral Heat Limited Amount Available Rarity shuddered at the thought. Knowing how bad it is with just opal causing her furniture unneeded damage. Wiz: Tao's genes allow her to instinctively access and utilize Seithr: a raw, powerful energy seething through the air. Tao can use Seithr to empower and transform her claws, as well as to execute incredibly vicious attacks. However, there is only so much Seithr in a given space, and once she runs out, Tao will lose many of her deadliest attributes. Boomstick: Also, apparently Tao likes to carry around a lot of random shit, which she then uses as projectiles during a fight: bowling balls, apple cores, pillo-- a pillow? Really!? “Oh, wonder if I can do that?” Pinkie asked, grabbing a pillow. With the pillow in her hooves, she moved her hooves to the side and somehow cocked it like a gun. Wiz: She's the fastest of the BlazBlue cast, darting around the arena with incredibly fast combos. However, she's also the weakest stamina-wise and doesn't have very many defensive options. “She’s like a glass cannon,” Twilight said, letting everyone know what Wiz meant. Boomstick: But, if you want to kick her ass, you gotta catch her first! Taokaka: Aah! It's the boobie lady! Wiz: Alright the combatants are set. Let's end this debate once and for all. Boomstick: After the thing people bitch about in the comments. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ As the ads roll, the girls and dragon were discussing on who they would be rooting for. For Team Felica, we had Fluttershy, Spike, Rarity and Twilight. As Applejack, Rainbow Dash and Pinkie were for Team Toakaka. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Boomstick: It's time for a Death Battle. Death Battle (*Cues: Darkstalkers 3 - Felicia's Ending Theme*) On a wooden bridge, a pink butterfly flies toward Felicia, who is wearing her nun attire and is watering plants. Felicia notices it and takes off her robes, then begins following it. She then leaps at it four times before accidentally bumping into Taokaka. Felicia jumps back while Taokaka is agitated. Taokaka: Alright! “CAT FIGHT!” cheered Spike. FIGHT! (*Cues: Calamity Trigger - BlazBlue Calamity Trigger*) Taokaka charges at Felicia, unleashing a long combo before knocking her into the air, then slamming her into the ground with her hook claws. She charges again when Felicia uses her rolling smash to jump onto her attacker, then unleashes a combo of her own. Felicia then knocks Taokaka into the air, jumps upward, slashes her a few times before grabbing her and throwing her to the ground. Felicia lands and Taokaka attempts to counter, but her attack is blocked, leaving her wide open to Felicia's delta kick. Felicia then uses rolling smash and moves back and forth, hitting Taokaka repeatedly before she jumps upward and catches Felicia. Taokaka proceeds to stab Felicia multiple times with her claws before Felicia completely reverses it with her hell cat grapple, concluding by throwing Taokaka. Taokaka: Boing! Taokaka has her hands on the ground and her tail in the air while Felicia in her fighting stance as well. “This is getting intense,” muttered Rainbow Dash, as she leaned in further to watch the insane fight. (*Cues Felicia's Darkstalkers 3 Ending Theme again*) Then the butterfly from before returns, grabbing both of their attention. The two repeatedly leap at it and as the butterfly approaches Felicia, Taokaka slashes it with her claws. “Are they… “ trailed of Rarity. Lost for words. “Eyup!” replied Applejack. Taokaka: Whoops! Felicia is upset. Felicia: No, no, no! Felicia then lunges at Taokaka, letting out a cat-like roar, and unleashes a combo on her. The two trade combos until Taokaka is slashing at thin air, forgetting where Felicia is. Felicia lands on “SHIT!” cursed a surprise Rainbow Dash. Taokaka and slashes at her face before knocking her back with a kick. Taokaka gets into a one-legged stance when Felicia uses rolling smash. She catches Felicia off-guard using her saw blades, knocking her back. Felicia uses sandsplash, but to no avail as Taokaka jumps right over it, trapping her in a combo and knocking Felicia into the air. She strikes Felicia multiple times, keeping her in the air, then lands. Taokaka then takes out her claws and jumps upward. Taokaka: Taokaka boom! The strike is so devastating that it slices Felicia in half, seperating her top and bottom halfs of her body. Taokaka is then shown dancing. K.O.!. Taokaka: Nya ha, nya ha, nya ha! Taokaka then sits down on the ground. Taokaka: Now I'm bored. Results (*Cues: Bright - BlazBlue*) Boomstick: Felicia just got put down! “Poor Miss Felicia,” Rarity said, feeling sad that a kind soul lost the fight. Fluttershy lowered her head, trying to head the tears threatening to run down her face. The thought of Felicia not being there for the children was heartbreaking for soft spoken mare. Wiz: But this one was very close; based on their move sets, Tao appeared to have a slight speed advantage. Though, Felicia had the endurance of a Dark Stalker, Tao's superior agility eventually gave her the win. “Speed does tend to beat endurance sometimes,” Twilight said, knowing it first hand. “Ponies like me and Tao can dish out damage faster than our opponents can handle,” bragged Rainbow Dash. Boomstick: Not to mention she's got freakin' razorblades for claws! Felicia just took her final meow. “That joke was CATastrophe!” giggled out Pinkie Pie, getting a frustrated sigh from all her friends. Wiz: The winner is Taokaka. END. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Boomstick: Next time on Death Battle! (cue God of War III Theme) The girls were awed as they see a masculine figure standing under a raging storm, they can hardly see him. The camera changes and they see up close to his face; All they see is an angry and avenging with a hint of bloodlust look in the the fiery eyes he displays which also intimidates the girls and had spike hide behind a equally scared Twilight. Then they see a male figure shrouded by a red cape and he's wearing a skintight, black suit, with white streaks on the chest and mask. The suit is also decorated with chains, spikes and skulls giving him a deadly appearance.. The music indicates these two fighters are cold blooded killers even destroyer of worlds. The title says it all. Kratos vs Spawn ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ “Hooo wee! That was a fun episode,” Applejack said, taking off her hat to wipe her brow. “I’ll say. It was awesome to see characters use their speed in a fight,” Rainbow Dash said, hovering in the air while throwing a few punches. “I sure wish we could learn a little bit more about them though,” Fluttershy quietly added in. getting nod of agreements from everyone. Suddenly a bright light started to shine from the corner of the room right where twilight placed the box that once contained the Death Battle DVDs. “What in tarnations!” Applejack said, getting ready to fight if she needed to. “Whatever it is, it needs to cut it out!” And as soon as the light started it ended just as quickly, leaving the group confused on what just happened. “Is that supposed to happen Twilight?” asked a scared Fluttershy. “Well only way to find out!” yelled Pinkie as she ignored the screams of protest from her friends as she tore the box open. She looked inside the box in silence. “Ooooh! Guy’s you need to take a look at this!” yelled the party pony, as she started to dig through the box. “What is it, darling? More dvds?” Rarity asked, curious of what’s inside the box. “Nope! Even better!” cheered the pink pony, still having half of her body inside the box. “Are those comics?” Twilight asked, squinting her eyes a bit. Next to her, Spike had a huge smile on his face when comics were mentioned. “And posters. There’s even a Haggar one,” Pinkie said, holding a large poster of said wrestler on it. The girls walked towards the box and took a look inside. “Oh my, there seems to be comics on each of the contestants of the show,” Rarity said while pulling out a stack of Darkstalkers comics. “Awesome. There’s some on the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles,” Rainbow excitedly said, holding a huge stack of TMNT comics. “You gotta let me read them once I’m done,” Pinkie said, balancing some Wonder Woman comics on her head. “Um, I’ll read these if nopony minds,” Fluttershy stuttered, holding a moderately sized stack of Mario comic with Yoshi on the cover. “I’m gonna enjoy these,” Applejack said, holding a few Street Fighter comics. “As will I,” Twilight said, levitating a few Metroid mangas out of the box. “I wonder If we’ll get anything else if we continue watching the show?” The others look at her curiously as Spike searches through the box for any comics he could read. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Chapter end- Next time: Kratos vs Spawn
Kratos VS Spawn.The next day we find our group of young watcher at the ballroom yet again, but this time yet again they are accompanied by the two rulers of Equestria. Princess Celestia and Princess Luna were able to make time out of their busy schedules to watch a few more episodes of Death Battle with their young friends. “Thanks for the intro Mr. narrator,” whispered Pinkie Pie. No problem. “I’m glad you two could join us again,”Twilight said with a smile. Happy to be able to spend time with her mentor again. “Me and my sister will always make time for our friends,” Celestia said as she gave her former apprentice a quick nuzzle. One that Twilight was more then happy to return. “Agreed! We also appreciate that you're willing to share the gifts that you all got from the magic box,” added in Luna as she waved around her new street fighter comics. Even Celestia quickly put away her poster of haggar while sporting a small blush. “Well let’s start the next batch of episodes!” said Twilight, getting some cheers of agreement from her friends. Interlude (*Cues: Invader - Jim Johnston*) Wiz: Of all the warriors who have entered this arena, none can compete with these two titans of death. Kratos, the Ghost of Sparta who single-handedly annihilated Olympus… “This Kratos sounds like a powerful warrior,” Luna said, thinking of the few battles from a thousand years ago. Celestia had a slight flashback to her fight with Knightmare Moon but shook her head to rid her of those thoughts. Boomstick: ...and Spawn, who managed to dethrone both Satan and God. “He must have be powerful to defeat a god,” Rarity said, trying to imagine someone with that kind of power. Wiz: I'm Wizard and he's Boomstick, and it's our job to analyze their weapons, armor, and skills to find out who would win a Death Battle. Kratos (*Cues: God Of War III - Brothers Of Blood *) Wiz: Kratos is a demigod, raised among the Spartans as their greatest warrior, until one day, his people were threatened to be overrun. It was then he stuck a deal with Ares, the God of War. Ares would give him the strength to protect his people; in return, Kratos would serve as Ares' champion warrior. “I’m not sure how I feel about this?” Background Over 6' Tall A Spartan Warrior Hold the Rank of Captain Self-Centered Anti-Hero Superhuman Strength, Speed, & Endurance Boomstick: Kratos became super-powerful and really vicious, but was tricked by Ares into killing his own family. But hey, he saved some money on child support and divorce! “Not. Funny,” Everyone growled out, even the princesses thought the joke was very poor in taste. Wiz: As the white, hot ashes of his family clung permanently to his skin- Boomstick: Just like Michael Jackson! Wiz: -his quest for vengeance against the gods of Olympus began. As a demigod, Kratos possesses great strength, speed, and endurance. He can survive a pummeling from a Titan and best the power of Hercules. “He went up against that?” Rainbow yelled, surprised at seeing Kratos fighting the giant titan. “You’d have to be crazy to try that, Rainbow,” Applejack said, not liking how easily the so called ghost defeats his enemies with ease. Boomstick: Kratos wields the Blades of Exile, twin short swords bound to his arms by chains. The blades have a hook design that Kratos can use to cut right through his enemies, or snag them and whip 'em around. Blades of Exile Dual Short Swords Wielded with Chains Seared to Arms Hooked Design Made from the Remains of the Blades of Athena (*Cues: Kratos' Theme - God of War*) Boomstick: And like most badass weapons, they can somehow emit fire. “I would so want those,” Spike said, awed by the design and the fire. He imagined himself using those swords the beat some diamond dogs and saving Rarity from them. “Even if it meant having them bound to your arms?” Celestia asked in her motherly tone, causing Spike to think about it before shaking his head. “Naw! I’ll settle with my own fire,” replied spike. Wiz: Kratos is well trained in sword combat and possesses what may be the most powerful sword the Greek gods have to offer - the Blade of Olympus. Everyone could only marvel at the beautifully made blade. Boomstick: After Kratos killed Ares, Uhhh, spoiler!, he was made the God of War. But Zeus tricked him into putting all his godly powers into this sword, making him mortal once again. “At least he got his revenge,” Twilight said, feeling a little conflicted on whether or not it’s a good thing or not that was a good thing. “Look at it this way Twi, he’s not under Ares’s control anymore,” Rainbow said, making Twilight agree with it. Wiz: And making the Blade of Olympus a deadly harbinger of death to even the toughest Olympians. His most versatile defense is his Golden Fleece, armor capable of blocking powerful blows and deflecting magical attacks. Blade of Olympus Can Kill Gods & Titans Contains God Powers Fires Blue Energy Waves About 5 Feet Long “A weapon that can even kill these greek gods? That wasn’t a smart thing to do,” Rarity said, not understanding why they would try to do that. Kratos was able to kill a god, it wasn’t like he couldn’t do it again. Golden Fleece Gold Armlet Blocks Attacks Deflects Projectiles & Magical Attacks Strong Enough to Counter the Blade of Olympus “That would have helped during the changeling invasion,” Celestia said, wishing she could have reflected that one blast back at Queen Chrysalis. Boomstick: But there's a whole lot more to this guy's arsenal, like the Bow of Apollo, which can shoot a rapid stream of arrows or charge up deadly fire arrows. “Almost sounds like a bow starswirl tried to make one time,” commented Celestia. “Really!? How did that turn out?” asked Twilight. Interested on how a project from her hero worked out. “The results were… explosive,” muttered out celestia. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Flashback 1500 years ago ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ “What in Tartarus name happened Starswirl!?” Screamed Celestia. While pointed towards the now burning castle. As her servants and sister trying tried their best to put out the flames. “I can fix this! I can fix this!” yelled Starswirl in fright. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Bow of Apollo Can Rapid-Fire Arrows Charged Fire Arrows Does Not Drain Kratos' Magic Limit Quick with a Long Range Wiz: Then there's the Claws of Hades, which mercilessly rip the souls out of their victims, though tough opponents like Kratos can resist them. Claws of Hades Used like Blades of Exile Spiked Chains & Hooks Rips Souls from Victims Can be Resisted Can Summon Souls “That’s a pretty scary weapon,” Fluttershy stuttered, feeling scared of a weapon that can rip a soul from the body. “Scary isn’t the word I’d use,” Twilight said, wondering who would make such a evil weapon. “It seems like something that Sombra would have used,” Celestia muttered just loud enough for her sister to hear. Luna silently nodded as Sombra would use this weapon without hesitation. Boomstick: The Nemean Cestus are giant ultra-strong gauntlets which can stun foes with brutal shockwaves. Nemean Cestus Giant Metal Gauntlets Lion-Like Appearance Originally Owned by Hercules Incredibly Strong Can Create Shockwaves which Stun Foes “Wonder if those could help he harvest more apples?” Applejack asked, thinking the shockwaves they make could hit a couple of trees at once. Wiz: The Boots of Hermes give him superhuman speed, and when battling the infamous Icarus, he ripped those huge wings off the old fool's back and took them for his own, giving him powers of flight. “He ripped the wings off the guy? That’s brutal,” Rainbow said, hugging herself with her wings. Fluttershy could only whimper in response. Boots of Hermes Greaves with Small Wings Improved Running Speed Can Run Up Walls Icarus Wings Can Glide & Fly Huge 18' Wingspan Slowly Falls Apart During Flight Ripped From Icarus' Back Boomstick: Holy crap, that's a lot of weapons! I like this guy! “He’s the very definition of overkill,” Snarked Rarity. Wiz: Kratos is not invincible, but he is very difficult to kill. Boomstick: Hell, he can't even kill himself! The group winced at the image of Kratos stabbing himself with the Blade of Olympus. Wiz: In his rage, he tore apart the ranks of Mount Olympus and slaughtered every god upon and below it... except for Aphrodite. Boomstick: For obvious reasons! “Sigh… dammit Boomstick,” muttered Rarity in frustration. Wiz: In doing so, he ultimately brought about the end of the world. Without the power of the gods to keep the chaos in check, the apocalypse had arrived, and its vanguard was Kratos. Ares: I was trying to make you a great warrior. Kratos: You succeeded. Kratos impales Ares with the with his sword. Spawn (*Cues: Spawn in the Demon's Hand - Opening Sequence (Arcade Version)*) Wiz: Al Simmons was trained to be a deadly, stealthy soldier and assassin, and proved numerous times he was the best of the best. But when his morality got the better of him, his boss terminated his contract... permanently. Background Height: 6'2" Weight: 450 lbs. Skilled Assassin Superhuman Strength, Speed, & Durability Composed of Necroplasm Regeneration Healing “My word. That’s horrible,” Rarity cried out, thinking of how horrible it must be to die and look like that. Boomstick: That's when Simmons met Malebolgia, one of the Demon Lords of Hell, who struck a deal with him: He'd get to see his wife again if he became captain of Hell's armies. He agreed and was reborn as a Hellspawn. But as with most Demons, it tricked him, leaving Spawn with a fate worse than death. And of course, Spawn swore revenge! “Poor thing,” cried out Fluttershy. (*Cues: Spawn The Eternal - Track 6*) Wiz: Being a Hellspawn, he has superhuman strength and speed. He is nearly invulnerable and can use his own powers to heal and regenerate. Boomstick: In addition, Spawn can feed off the evil auras of others for the same effect. It really saves him on Band-Aids! Wiz: He wears a living parasitic-symbiotic suit named Leetha of the 7th House of K. Leetha of the 7th House of K Symbiotic Suit Limited by Imagination Can Create Chains, Spikes, Claws, Shrouds, etc. Has a Mind of its own Feeds off Necroplasm or Natural Evil Energies Boomstick: Leetha has ridiculous powers. Basically, anything she or Spawn wants to happen can happen. The suit can create and control chains, claws, spikes, and morph itself into pretty much anything Spawn wants, like a badass cape that can drag enemies and protect Spawn from all sorts of danger. “Wow, that suit sounds useful,” Pinkie said, wondering if the suit comes in pink. “I’m not sure if that suit is evil or not,” Twilight muttered to herself. Wiz: The suit has a mind of its own, and can operate while Spawn focuses on other parts of the battle. It is strong enough to easily smash through brick, and fast enough to block bullets. However, Leetha feeds off necroplasm energy when using the suit's powers, a hellish matter which Spawn is entirely composed of. If Leetha uses too much, Spawn will be sent back to Hell. However, like Spawn, Leetha can also feed off the evil and sin of others. “Well, that’s good?” Fluttershy said, thinking that it helps Spawn fight monsters. Boomstick: Spawn's also got tons of magic powers. He can teleport, transform, blow things up, turn invisible, alter matter, talk to animals, fly with his cape, read minds, and open portals to Heaven and Hell. Ho-oly crap! Magic Can alter matter Communicate with animals Flight & Teleportation Necroplasm Projection Healing the sick & even resurrecting the dead Elemental Control “H-He can do all that?” Twilight stuttered, knowing she has a hard time using more than half the stuff on the list. “So we found a guy better than you in magic?” Spike asked, smiling at his friend/sister/mother. “Now spike, no teasing.” Celestia chasted. Wiz: And he can control the elements, often using fire and water to defeat swarms of enemies. However, even with all these godlike abilities, Spawn usually resorts to his most primitive weapon. As he was trained in Special Forces for so long, Spawn is most comfortable using a gun. He is an expert in the use of nearly any firearm imaginable. Expert Marksman Weapon of Choice Least Effective Weapons Skilled with all types “At least he doesn’t solely rely on his magic alone,” Rarity said, knowing many do learn anything outside their craft. “Tis a lesson many can learn from,” Luna said in agreement. Boomstick: Only two things can break through Spawn's defenses and hurt him: Necro-magic and holy weapons forged in Heaven. In addition, he can only die if he's beheaded. “Decapitation!!!” sang out Pinkie Pie in a bloody scream, that would make a certain roady proud. Specific Weaknesses Magic Necroplasm Holy Weapons forged in Heaven His Dwindling amount of Necroplasm Can only die through Beheading “Those are quite specific weaknesses he has,” Applejack said, wondering if Kratos can even stand a chance to Spawn. Wiz: Spawn killed all sorts of powerful enemies - assassins, cyborgs, vampires, ghosts, Angels, Demons, other Hellspawn, rampaging deities, even Satan and God. Yes, that old lady is the God. Boomstick: Really? God looks like my nanna... Am I a demigod? “Harmony I hope not,” begged Rarity, feeling sorry for whatever fools worship him. Wiz: And after being granted unlimited power from the Mother of all things, Spawn banished God and Satan from the Earth, which he wiped clean and rebuilt in his own image. He then willingly sacrificed his own God powers and eventually returned to his Hellspawn form. Boomstick: Ah, why the hell would he do that! He must've been really bored! “There are more things than power boomstick,” lectured Twilight. Spawn blows up a wall. Spawn: Knock, knock! “Who’s there?” giggled Pinkie Pie. Wiz: Alright the combatants are set. Let's end this debate once and for all. Boomstick: But first, let's take your commerical break from Jackthreads. Over you, Boomstick! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ As the ads started to everyone decided to be neutral on this one. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Boomstick: It's time for a Death Battle Death Battle (*Cues: God Of War II - Colossus of Rhodes*) In an ancient underground palace lit by torchlight, Kratos marches up a staircase before turning around to see Spawn appear in a flash of green flame behind him, whipping out his Blades of Exile. “Here we go,” muttered Twilight. FIGHT! (*Cues: God Of War III - Poseidon's Wrath*) Spawn doesn't move a muscle as Leetha summons several chains to attack Kratos, which he blocks and slices through for a few moments. Eventually, Spawn pulls a large gun and starts shooting Kratos, who defends himself by crossing the Blades in front of him. He quickly swipes a Blade to disarm Spawn, but misses his next swing as Spawn teleports behind him, landing a blow before getting stabbed by a Blade. He is dragged forward only to be kicked back by Kratos. “Already getting bloody,” commented Celestia. Spawn lands at the foot of the stairs and barely dodges a leaping attack by Kratos. He follows Spawn into the next room, but doesn't see his opponent. (*Cues: Spawn in the Demon's Hand - Smelter (Admonisher Stage)*) Spawn lowers his invisibility and leaps from the wall he was hanging on the kick at Kratos. Spawn's punches send Kratos airborne, then uses his teleportation and speed to deliver more blows to get Kratos flying. “Whooo” cheered Rainbow Dash. Flying quickly, Spawn sees Kratos at the foot of another staircase, and hurls a ball of energy at Kratos, which he sends back at Spawn. Kratos hooks Spawn and brings him down the stairs, then uses his Nemean Cestus to knock Spawn into the next room. “This is getting brutal,” muttered Applejack. The blow's force pushes Spawn to the edge of a gap between two sections, which he floats over as Kratos reaches him, laughing and shooting more energy blasts at Kratos. He deflects them away with the Golden Fleece before summoning the Icarus Wings and tackling Spawn to the other side. While Kratos hangs on the ledge, Spawn leaps up and prepares to deliver a blow with the line "You're pissing me off" just as Kratos grabs him with the Blades and they both fall into the pit. (*Cues: God Of War - Minotaur Boss Battle*) The two land safely at the bottom, Kratos pulling out the Bow of Apollo and shooting arrows at Spawn behind the defense of his cape, finally charging up the next arrow. Spawn uses his elemental control to make the flame engulf Kratos, then launches a necroplasm grenade in the fire, exploding in bursts of smoke. “Such power,” gasped out Luna. (*Cues: God Of War III - Overture*) Kratos, however, jumps from the blaze with the Blade of Olympus in hand, nearly striking the teleporting Spawn, then easily cutting through Leetha's chains and stabbing Spawn through the chest. He remains still for a moment before teleporting off the Blade, behind Kratos, and holding him in the air by his head, draining his evil energy in a flash of green. “That doesn't look good,” whimpered out Fluttershy. Spawn: DIE! Spawn then creates a large spike in his hand through Kratos' head, killing the Ghost of Sparta. Everyone winced at the brutal display and Spike had to rush to one of the bathrooms. K.O.! Results (*Cues: Unknown Theme*) Boomstick: Aaahhhh, man - here's comes the rage from the God of War fanboys! “(shiver.) Fanboys…” shuddered Rainbow Dash. She saw the horror that was know as fanboys while at a Wonderbolts race and a Daring Doo convention. At least she had a good friend that one time who wasn’t that bad. Wiz: Kratos is a very difficult one to beat, but Spawn's magical prowess and near-indestructible body proved too much for him. Boomstick: Yeah, normally, that last attack would've meant the end for his opponent, but not Spawn! “Only decapitation can truly kill spawn,” added in Luna. Wiz: And while much of Kratos' arsenal was forged by Olympians, Olympus is composed of Earthly elements, and is not another plane of existence like Heaven, so it stands to reason none of the Olympian weapons would kill Spawn. Boomstick: Except the Blade of Olympus, but it wasn't enough. “So Kratos was doomed from the start,” muttered Applejack. Wiz: Plus, Spawn and his suit had plenty of evil energy to feed on during the fight, since Kratos is literally covered in his past sins. “With such large source of sin there was no way spawn could lose,” Twilight realised. Boomstick: Well, that was one Hell of a fight! “Well it seems boomstick joke didn’t get better from the last time we were here,” drawled out Luna. Wiz: The winner is Spawn. END. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Boomstick: Next time on Death Battle. Slayer of Dragons This caught the groups attention, especially a young drakes, who gulped nervously Explosion Extraordinaire This one caught Pinkie’s attention, if her jumping up and down with a huge grin was any indication. The group wondered who this two fighters where and what beings of such titles would look like. They are… two funny looking characters that you would never guess where a slayer of dragons or a bomb expert . everyone had their jaws dropped, not in awe, but shock. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ “Well that truly was an intense battle,” commented Celestia. Wiping her brow from the instance showdown she just witness. “I have to agree with you there sister.” agreed Luna. “I’m just happy we don’t have to worry about a being like Kratos rampaging around our lands,” said Celestia in relief. Getting a nod from Luna, both happy that they didn’t have to fear a being that would stop at nothing to kill them and everything they built for. “PRINCESSES!!!” yelled a gruff voice that surprised the two royal sisters and caused them to turn towards where the voice came from. But as soon as they did they came face to face with the very person they were talking about. The ghost of sparda himself, Kratos! “AAAAAAAHHHHHHH,” the princesses screamed as they began to feel a little light headed as the room was spinning. The next moment they saw nothing but a black void as they passed out. A familiar voice started to giggle and said, “Look what the magic box gave us, it’s a full budy standee of Kra-Kra. Isn’t it cool?” A familiar pink furred and pink maned face popped out from the side of the standee and asked, “Princesses? You okay?” The only response she got where her friends facepalming. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Chapter end! Next time Bomberman VS Dig Dug.
Bomberman VS Dig Dug.After they were able to awaken the two sisters and were able to have Pinkie Pie apologize for scaring them, everyone sat back down and watch the next episode. “That was a pretty lazy into Mr. author,” Pinkie Pie scolded. Bite me. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Interlude (*Cues: Invader - Jim Johnston*) Wiz: Today, two experts of destruction and masters of terrain will fight to the bitter end. Boomstick: White Bomber, the Bomberman... Wiz: And Taizo Hori, aka Dig Dug. Boomstick: He's Wiz and I'm Boomstick. Wiz: And it's our jobs to analyze their weapons, armour and skills to find out who would win a Death Battle. Bomberman (*Cues: Unknown Theme*) Boomstick: Bomberman is a psychopathic cyborg slave forced to duel other slaves to the death in dimly-lit maze-like arenas for the entertainment of alien terrorists. “Holy cow!! That’s so awesome!!” cheered rainbow dash. Completely floored that the lame looking creature could be so cool. Wiz: No, no, not that Bomberman, Boomstick. “Awww…” moned everyone in disappointment, all except Fluttershy who sighed in relief. (*Cues: Classic Mode/Standard Battle (Original) - Bomberman Generation*) Wiz: White Bomber, the Bomberman, an alien robot warrior from the planet Bomber who belongs to an intergalactic police force protecting the galaxy. “So this fellas a space cop?” questioned Applejack Boomstick: Oh... well, his method of saving those planets is blowing the shit out of them, so he's alright with me. “B-but how is that saving anyone!?” screamed Twilight. Wiz: Right! Bomberman cares little for the environment he is supposedly protecting, making him an unpredictable opponent. “Doesn't seem like the kind of person we would have upholding the law,” commented Celestia. Getting a nod of agreement from her sister and from everyone else. But no one notice pinkie pie looking out of the ballroom window, then sneaking out the door while everyone was distracted by the show. Background: Alien Robot Warrior Generate Bombs Defender of the Galaxy Uses explosives to save helpless planets Young & Naive Boomstick: Bomberman's answer to every problem is... explosions! Got a locked door? Blow it up! Behind on taxes? Blow them up! Have a naggy wife? Blow her ass up too! His arsenal consists of bombs, bombs, and more bombs, which usually take about two or three seconds to detonate. And while the explosions start off small, they can be upgraded to destroy an entire acre all at once. Plus, he can charge a bomb up to over four times its size for maximum destruction. Bombs: 2-3 second detonation Cannot be defused Upgradeable Can be kicked or thrown Can be powered up by being held “Those are some truly dangerous weapons,” said Luna Wiz: While blasting his way through planet after planet, Bomberman finds numerous power-ups buried beneath the earth. “I hope that's not the reason why he ends up blowing up planets,” Rarity said. Hoping that the bomberman was not killing off planets just to get more power. (*Cues: Battle Game - Bomberman Jetters*) Wiz: Bomb Up gives him extra bombs, Accelerator increases his running speed, Armor gives him temporary immunity, the Explosion Expander gives his bombs a power boost, and Bomb Kick and Power Glove let him kick and throw bombs at his own leisure. Boomstick: And when he picks up Super Bombs, you know he means business. I'm talkin' T2: Judgement Day business. Power-Ups: Accelerator Armor Explosion Expander Bombkick Power Glove Super Bomb The group could only gulp at the wide variety of ways the white bomber could lay waste to their planet. Wiz: Bomberman can also hatch and tame wild Rooeys, kangaroo-like creatures which give White Bomber a distinct advantage in battle. “Their so cute!” cooed Fluttershy, completely falling for the cute creatures and wishing she could make friends with them. Boomstick: Each Rooey has a different ability, though generally they are very fast, have incredibly good jumping skills, can step over bombs, and sacrifice themselves for Bomberman if need be. Kind of like Yoshi. “Nooo!” Cried Fluttershy. Rooeys: Easily Tamed Super Speed High Jumps Can step over bombs Sometimes called 'Looeys' or 'Louies' Wiz: Which brings up Bomberman's weakness: his own weapons. If White Bomber's careless, he can easily get caught in his own explosion or trap himself between a wall and his dropped bombs. “It’s for those reasons we never let our royal guard handle any explosives,” explained Celestia. “We don’t want a repeat from 1500 years ago,” Luna deadpanned. Boomstick: Yeah, Bomberman's pretty good at blowing shit up, but he's not so hot when it comes to defusing his own explosives, but he's survived through a crap-ton of games, leaving behind many smoldering piles of rubble that used to be planets, towns, and families Bomberman: I did it! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ The group wasn’t sure what to think of The white Bomber, but they could agree that he was dangerous. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Dig Dug (*Cues: Dig Dug Game Room Theme - Namco Museum Vol.3*) Wiz: Dig Dug is an expert excavator and executioner. He consistently traverses the underground to slay dragons. His real name is Taizo Hori, which literally means "I want to dig". He is also the father of the more recent phenomenon, Mr. Driller. “This guy actively hunts dragons!?” gasped out Spike. Background: Real Name: Taizo Hori Honorary Chairman of the Driller Council Father of Mr. Driller Ex-Husband of 'Kissy' from Baraduke A.K.A. Alien Sector Boomstick: Dig Dug has two loves in life: diggin' and killin'. His main weapon is one of the most cruel and deadly weapons I've ever seen. It's pretty much a cross between a bike pump and a harpoon. “Oh sweet celestia…” Twilight was quick to figure out what that weapon did. Wiz: An odd weapon, which I would normally question the efficiency of... “As would I,” Rarity agreed. Not understanding what was so deadly about it. Boomstick: But when he stabs you with it... you're gonna wish you die any other way than what Mr. Dig Dug has planned for you. Now everyone was starting to get an uneasy feeling about the Pump weapon. Wiz: The average human body can only take around 15 pounds per square inch of air pressure before death is assured. Every time Dig Dug pumps, over 10 PSI is injected into his victim, quickly immobilizing them. Two or three pumps later, Dig Dug's target combusts. “Mother of me,” Celestia whispered out. Boomstick: That is one horrible way to die. Imagine after being impaled, you're then slowly filled with air until you explode. Oh man, this guy is sick. Pump: 15' Harpoon-like hose Forcefully inflates foes Stuns enemies for a short time Injects 10 psi per pump Pumped until the victim explodes “WHAT SICKO USES SOMETHING LIKE THAT!?” screamed Rainbow dash, as she held onto a frightened Fluttershy. Wiz: Dig Dug also has a jackhammer, which he uses to burrow through the earth at an unimaginable speed. He has total control over his terrain and can maneuver through the ground just as easily as walking through an empty field, climbing and crawling without slowing down. “This monster can dig far greater than any diamond dog,” muttered Rarity. Jackhammer: Burrows in 4 directions Instant start up Fast & Efficient Can tear apart islands (that terrified the group beyond words.) Boomstick: That jackhammer can even force entire islands to split apart, but the strangest thing is the sound it makes. You'd think a jackhammer would sound like this... (*jackhammer sound*) Everyone winced from the loud noise of the Jackhammer. Boomstick: But Dig Dug's sounds like this. (*Dig Dug walking sound*) That actually got some raised brows from the group. Wiz: Actually, Boomstick, that sound seems to occur each time he takes a step, not just when he's drilling. Boomstick: So... what? It's his feet? Man, that would get really annoying. No wonder this guy is a psycho. “Still not a good reason to kill his enemies like that.” growled out Twilight. Wiz: Dig Dug possesses great physical endurance, climbing and digging tirelessly for unprecedented amounts of time, and yet he is easily defeated when tackled by a tomato with eyes. Boomstick/everyone: What? Wiz: Yes, Dig Dug battles both ferocious dragons and living tomatos. “That’s… so stupid,” deadpanned Luna. Boomsticks: Who in the hell thought walking tomatoes with goggles were on-par with fire-breathing ghost dragons? “YA!” yelled an enraged Spike. Angry at the fact that his people where compared to a Fruit with eyes The group sees Dig Dug sneak up on a unsuspecting dragon and then attaches his weapon onto the poor creature. “Oh god no…” muttered Spike (*Pumps dragon three times*) “Nononono!” the young drake cried out. (*Dragon explodes*) “NOOOOO!” screamed Spike, as Twilight was Quick to embrace the poor child, (*Dig Dug level complete jingle*) Wiz: Alright the combatants are set, let's end this debate once and for all. Boomstick: But first, I spilled some coffee on my space dinosaur t-shirt and I need to get another but wheeere? Wiz: Why aa Bustedtees of course. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Everyone was stunned at the brutal way dig dug would beat his enemies and worried for the white bomber. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Boomstick: But right now, It's time for a Death Battle! Death Battle (*Cues: Stage Theme - Bomberman NES*) Bomberman is riding a Rooey across Dig Dug's field when they suddenly cross Dig Dug. FIGHT! (*Cues: Battle - Bomberman 64*) Dig Dug fires his harpoon, which the Rooey gets out of the way of, then it dashes into Dig Dug six times. After the last hit, Dig Dug sees a bomb dropped by Bomberman and quickly burrows into the ground. The explosion destroys a block and reveals an Explosion Expander, which Bomberman goes for. Dig Dug sneaks up underneath Bomberman, stabbing his harpoon into the Rooey. After four pumps, the Rooey explodes, leaving Bomberman on the ground. He then quickly gets up, lifts up a bomb, charges it twice, then drops it into the hole. Dig Dug sees it and runs away once again. The explosion destroys more blocks, revealing four power-ups: Accelerator, Explosion Expander, Bomb-Up, and Bomb Kick. Bomberman walks over and picks all four of them up before following Dig Dug's trail and kicking a bomb in his direction. (*Cues: Masker - Bomberman 64*) Dig Dug turns around and uses his harpoon to deflect it. Bomberman then kicks it, with the cycle continuing until Bomberman throws another bomb. Both flee as the bombs' both create huge plus-shaped explosions, destroying many blocks, underneath them the Super Bomb, which Bomberman grabs. Dig Dug continues fleeing, digging his way upward towards the surface as Bomberman holds the Super Bomb in his hand, charging it to four times its size, before throwing it. The explosion from it is so great that Dig Dug, who nearly made it, is in the air with no blocks around him, causing him to fall down in front of Bomberman, who has another Super Bomb for him. (*Cues: Boss Intro #2 - Bomberman 64*) As Bomberman charges it twice, Dig Dug quickly fires his harpoon at Bomberman, causing him to drop the Super Bomb, then pumps him twice before digging underneath to escape the inevitable explosion. Bomberman slowly recovers, then turns to see his Super Bomb about to go off. His “Oh he done Bucked up!” cried applejack. eyes turn large and cartoonish as he lets out a scream before the Super Bomb explodes, leaving a huge hole in the ground. Dig Dug then looks over at the newly-made hole, seeing that his opponent was obliterated by his own weapon. K.O.! Results (*Cues: Dig Dug REMIX - Trailer Theme*) Boomstick: Yeah, explosions! “YA!!” cheered Rainbow Dash. Wiz: Dig Dug is a difficult opponent for anyone to beat, not for brute strength but maneuverability. Dig Dug had complete control over the terrain right off the bat, while Bomberman was forced to rely on his power ups for success. “The fact that he had to resort to his top weaponry was a huge sign that he was out class from the start,” lectured Twilight. Boomstick: Taking the fight into the ground gave Dig Dug a huge advantage. “And you never fight an enemy on their terms,” added Luna, remembering Commander Hurricane’s lessons back before the whole Nightmare Moon incident. Wiz: Even after if it looked like Bomberman took the lead, Dig Dug proved he could control his opponent just as much as he can control his environment. Boomstick: Bomberman sure went out with a bang. Everyone groaned at that lame pun. Wiz: The winner is Dig Dug. END! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Boomstick: Next time on Death Battle. The group see a bipedal animal like figure walking out of the smoke. He's some kind of hedgehog wearing red and white shoes, white gloves and two rings, each wrapped around his wrist. His fur is grayish gold with red stripes and he glowed with some kind of aura like energy that was as bright as the sun. He speaks in a intimidating, chilling voice. ????: I am Shadow, the ultimate life form. Then they see a man with an arrogant look on his face. He's wearing some kind of strange outfit that could be armor and his spiky hair was glowing gold as well as his eyebrows that could put gold to shame in brilliance. He's also surrounded by an aura like energy. He also speaks in an arrogant voice but deadly voice. ?????: And I, am the Prince of all Saiyans! Vegeta vs Shadow. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ “Well that was yet another interesting episode,” commented Twilight “Yeah it was pretty cool. The explosions, the chase and everything was just right,” Rainbow said, lazily hovering in the air. “And it seems the box gave us a few plush toys of the characters,” Rarity said, holding a plushie of Bomberman in her magic. As everyone had their own plushie, Twilight noticed that there were two extra plushies inside the box. Confused by the extras the box gave, Twilight looked around to see if any of her friends didn’t get one. A quick head count showed her that someone was missing. “Where’s Pinkie?” Twilight asked her friends. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ With Pinkie Pie ~~~~~~~~~~~~~ We find Pinkie Pie outside Twilight’s crystal castle talking to …...Bomberman? What the fuck? “So you’re telling me your organization wants me to join them?” Pinkie Pie asked the white bomer. Bomberman nods happily. “Wowsers, I can be the first party pony in space,” Pinkie said, dancing happily. “Sign me up.” Bomberman made a happy sounding noise which mostly likely meant his approval. He pulled out a bomb shaped badge from… somewhere and gave it to Pinkie. He gave the party pony a happy little wave as he was surrounded by light and disappeared from sight. Most likely returning to his planet or to an arena to dispense justice to evildoers and planets. “Bye-Bye, Bomb-bomb,” Pinkie said, waving goodbye to her new destructive friend. She looked at her newly acquired badged, smiling at the thought of new adventures she’ll have in the near future. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ CHAPTER END! NEXT TIME VEGETA VS SHADOW!
Vegeta VS Shadow.After the girls were able to locate there wayward pink friend, they hurried back to the ballroom to finish off the last episode of the day. “See that's a much better intro,” complemented Pinkie Pie. Whatever… I don’t live for your approval. “Wow, you’re grumpy today. Anyways next episode,” Pinkie said as the episode started. Interlude (*Cues: Invader - Jim Johnston*) Wiz: Antiheroes. Walking a mysterious gray line between good and evil. Boomstick: They do what they want, however they want, when they want. Wiz: Vegeta, Prince of the Saiyans and rival to Goku… “A prince joins the fight?” Luna said, shocked that another member of royalty would fight. Boomstick: And Shadow, the Ultimate Life Form and rival to Sonic “How is a hedgehog a ultimate lifeform?” questioned Rainbow dash Wiz: I'm Wizard and he's Boomstick and it's our job to analyze their weapons, armor, and skills to find out who would win a Death Battle. Vegeta (*Cues: Hell's Bells - Dragon Ball Z*) Wiz: Born a prince to warrior-like Saiyan race, Vegeta's people were slaughtered by an evil tyrant named Freeza, who molded Vegeta into a deadly, ruthless killer. Over time, however, Freeza's iron grip over him led Vegeta to rebel, ushering Freeza's final defeat with the help of fellow Saiyan Goku. After struggling with adapting to life on Earth, Vegeta eventually became one of the planet's strongest defenders. “His whole race was destroyed?” Twilight yelled, scared of the alien who could annihilate a planet. “And was used by that despicable being,” Celestia angrily said, thinking of the Nightmare use her little sister. Boomstick: He even got hitched to Bulma, breaking poor Master Roshi's heart. Vegeta can move and fly at hypersonic speeds, he can survive underwater and in far outer atmospheres for long periods of time. He even has an endurance to survive a nuclear freakin' blast. “At least he’s married now,” Rarity said, slightly jealous the a prince found his princess. Background: Height: 5'5" Weight: 123 lbs. Saiyan Prince Elite Warrior Class Trained in Martial Arts Current Leader of the Z-Fighters (*Cues: Vegeta Powers Up - Dragon Ball Z*) Wiz: Vegeta can use a natural inner energy called ki to create devastating attacks. Boomstick: His trademark attack is a purple laser called the Galick Gun. “Oooh, did he say garlick gu-” asked Pinkie, before getting shushed by Twilight for interrupting. Wiz: His Big Bang attack unleashes a huge explosion of energy covering up vast distance, and can be narrowed to a beam for concentrated accuracy. “Such destructive power,” muttered Celestia with a hint of fear. Boomstick: He can launch a volley of energy bullets, pounding his foe with dozens of blasts, but his most devastating move is his Final Flash attack, a huge golden beam that can destroy whole planets. Wiz: Vegeta's ki is quite versatile and not limited to these four attacks. He is never without a weapon. Ki Attacks: Galick Gun Bang Beam Big Bang Attack Final Shine Energy Blast Volley Final Flash “Why would he need a weapon when he can use awesome laser beams,” Rainbow said, liking all his attacks. Boomstick: But wait! There's more! “There is!?” asked a flabbergasted Spike. Wiz: That's right! Vegeta can reach to the legendary status of Super Saiyan, a near indestructible form of which increases his power output by 500%. “Woah,” everyone said, amazed by his transformation. “He can change his hair color? And he doesn’t need some dye? That’s unfair,” Rarity said, slightly jealous Vegeta can change his image. Boomstick: And he can take this form to the next level for yet another 500% increase. That's a lot of power in math. Super Saiyan: Can reach levels 1 & 2 500% increase per form Can be activated any time Sustained through energy Nearly indestructible Level 2 drains more energy than Level 1 “Bow before Math!” yelled Twilight in her own version of the canterlot voice. Wiz: The Super Saiyan form is sustained through Vegeta's remaining energy. Also, despite reaching the level of Super Saiyan Four, he was only able to do so with Bulma's Blutz Wave Machine, and cannot do so naturally. Boomstick: And in Death Battle, we don't allow help from spouses. “That seems a little unfair,” Fluttershy said, believing that love can do many incredible things. “But it’s a part of the rules,” Applejack said, as her shy friend nodded to show she understood the rules. Wiz: Vegeta is cocky, arrogant, and proud. He seeks to be the best and is willing to fight the best to do so, even allowing his opponents reach power levels much greater than his own. Boomstick: Well, this has led to him dying twice so far, he's still around somehow kicking ass and being a dick. “Sounds like Rainbow Dash if we don’t keep her ego in check,” snarked Applejack. Getting a pout from said blue pegasus. Vegeta: I am a Super Saiyan! (screen flashes as Vegeta prepares attack) And you can burn in Hell! Shadow (*Cues: Throw It All Away (Instrumental) - Sonic Adventure 2*) Wiz: Built by Prof. Gerald Robotnik with alien DNA, Shadow the Hedgehog was created to be the Ultimate Life Form. Despite being a powerful, living weapon, Shadow's initial purpose was to provide genes capable of curing the deathly ill, specifically, Gerald's granddaughter, Maria. But before Shadow could be shared with the world, tragedy struck. “Why,” everyone cried as a few tears ran down their faces. Even Spike and the princesses were crying a bit as they lowered their heads in sadness. “What kind of monsters would harm a child?” Rarity asked, blowing her nose on a tissue. “The worst kind,” Celestia coldly said, secretly hating any form of child abuse or murder. Boomstick: Then Shadow went crazy and tried to destroy the Earth for revenge, but he ended up saving the day instead. Though people are still getting sick on Earth, so uhh... guess he kinda forgot about that whole living cure thing, huh? Background Height: 3'3" Weight: 77 lbs. Bio-Engineered Ultimate Life Form Nearly Indestructible Hypersonic Speed Martial Arts Skills “Guess the whole revenge thing made him forget his original purpose,” Spike said, weakly laughing at that. Wiz: Shadow can move at hypersonic speeds and survive underwater and in space. “Guess Dashie might have just lost her title,” Pinkie said giggling. “Seems like it, sugarcube,” Applejack said, laughing at her speedy friend. “I could so beat this ‘ultimate lifeform’ hooves down,” Rainbow said, glaring at the black hedgehog on the screen. Boomstick: He's even tough enough to survive a fall to the Earth from the moon, and that's one long ass fall. “How can a little hedgehog survive a fall like that,” Fluttershy wondered. Wiz: Well, it wasn't exactly the moon, but Shadow survived a fall of about 200,000 miles. By the time he hit the ground, he was falling at a rate of over 6,000,000 feet per second. Boomstick: I feel sorry for whatever was around when he landed, some guy just walking along and ... (indistinctly) OH MY GOD! “BOOOM, ow my leg!” screamed Pinkie Pie, before going into a giggling fit. (*Cues: All Hail Shadow [Orchestrated by YannickJason]*) Wiz: Right. Shadow possesses a natural link to the chaos force, a never ending pool of unbelievable energy. “Wow, that means he has more power than all of the unicorns combined,” Twilight said in awe. Boomstick: He can fire several different energy based projectiles like Chaos Spears and Beams. But his most powerful attack is Chaos Blast, a huge explosion which annihiates everything around him in seconds. Chaos Force Chaos Control Chaos Spear Chaos Blast Other Energy-Based Attacks Can be used to defend, heal, fly & warp Wiz: He can also manipulate time and space with Chaos Control, though depending on the situation using this technique to its fullest takes time and is impractical in combat. Also, Shadow wears two Inhibitor Rings, which are stricting his access to the chaos force to maintain control, should he remove them, his power increases immensely, but is somewhat uncontrollable and quickly tires him out. Inhibitor Rings Restricts Chaos Power Maintains Precision Control When removed, his powers increase exponentially When removed, his stamina drops quickly “Holy list of super powers Batman!” gasped out Pinkie Pie. “Who’s Batman?” asked a confused Twilight. “Meh you’ll find out in a few episodes,” waved off Pinkie, confusing her friends further. Boomstick: His chaos power also increases depending on the number of Chaos Emeralds he has, and when he gets seven of them, ha, he goes super. “Soooo… a rip off of super saiyan?” questioned Rainbow dash. Wiz: Super Shadow is the pinnacle of his powers, receiving a 1,000% power increase. “But it seems to jump to the same power level of super saiyan,” added in Applejack. Boomstick: He can fly, move near the speed of light, and is totally invincible. Super Form 1000% Power Increase Automatic Flight Unlimited Endurance Invincible Duration based on a time limit “... ok I give up,” said Rainbow Dash as she hung her head in defeat. Wiz: Despite this, Shadow's super form can only last a few minutes. Boomstick: But, considering his super speed, a short time to him is a long time to his opponents. Shadow: That's not all, I'm full of surprises. Wiz: Alright the combatants are set, let's end this debate once and for all… oh wait, let me get a new book first. Boomstick: An audio book? Wiz: From audible.com Boomstick: for people who are too lazy to read or are blind! Thought as why I got em. (ads play.) Death Battle (*Cues: Androids Steal Truck - Dragon Ball Z*) Shadow is skating from his hover shoes in a green field. He then stops in front of Vegeta, whose back is turned. Shadow: There you are! I knew I sensed an extraordinary power around here. Vegeta: Well that certainly sounds like me. (He turns to Shadow) Ummm...who and what are you? “He’s a hedgehog silly!” giggeld Pinkie Pie Shadow: I am Shadow the Hedgehog. (Shadow stands at fighting pose) The Ultimate Life Form! Vegeta: Ultimate Life Form? A weird looking rat, is an Ultimate Llfe Form? HAHAHAHA! That's a laugh. Word of advice, freak: you're little on the short side if you're trying to be threatening. Shadow: Funny. I was going to say the same thing about you. “Oh snap,” Rainbow said, high amused by the pre-battle banter. Vegeta: You've just sealed your fate, fool. “Seems the prince can’t take a joke,” snarked Applejack. FIGHT! (*Cues: Hyperbolic Time Chamber - Dragon Ball Z*) Shadow launches a kick at Vegeta, but the latter catches the former's feet, kicks him off. Vegeta then charges a blast of purple Ki energy in his hands before blasting it at Shadow. Vegeta: GALICK GUN, FIRE!! After being hit by a strong attack, Shadow's still standing from the blast, exhaustingly. Vegeta: Pathetic. Before you die, let me show you a True Ultimate Life Form! (*Cues: Super Saiyan Vegeta - Dragon Ball Z*) “This is some sick beats!” Rainbow dash Commented Vegeta powers up immensely, aura surrounding him, and his dark, gravity defying hair now glowing blonde, becoming the legendary status of Super Saiyan. Vegeta: Hehe! Tell me hedgehog, does a lab rat like you experience fear? “So coool!” cheered the blue mare. (*Cues: Mephiles' Whisper - Sonic the Hedgehog (2006)*) Shadow: You have... no idea... WHO YOU'RE DEALING WITH! (*he leaps up in mid-air and surrounds himself with all seven Chaos Emeralds*) Vegeta: What's this? “Is that one of the chaos emeralds?” Twilight asked, trying to get a better look at it. After he taps into the power of the seven Emeralds, he turns from a black to a yellow lime coloured hedgehog with a bright glow and aura with invincible godlike powers, becoming Super Shadow. Shadow: Behold the true power I possess! Vegeta: Wow... what a ripoff--- (*Super Shadow tackles Vegeta*) GAH!!! (*Cues: BOSS: HEAVY DOG - Shadow the Hedgehog*) Vegeta gets attacked by Shadow, blocking from a melee receiving from the arrogant, bioengineered hedgehog. Afterwards, Shadow side kicks Vegeta, leaving projectiles of Chaos energy after hitting Vegeta seven times, and from hitting by the energy left by Shadow, Vegeta then land crashes at the ground. Shadow then launches a barrage of his Chaos Spear at Vegeta, but Vegeta jumps up and knees Shadow to the abdomen, kicked him, and then launches a volley of Energy Bullets. But when the smoke clears, Shadow is gone. Vegeta: Wha-Where did he go? Shadow: Right behind you. Vegeta charges a blast of energy at concentrated accuracy, but before he can blast it at Shadow, the latter snaps his finger, teleports the former underwater. Vegeta: (voiceover) ... The hell? How did I get here? (*annoyed groan*) “He did that with the snap of his fingers,” Spike said, shocked at how fast Shadow could teleport someone. Shadow: Hmph. That was easier than I thought, I guess I'm better than... SHIT! “Huh? Him cursing seems… forced,” commented Pinkie Pie. (*Cues: Androids Steal Truck - Dragon Ball Z again*) Vegeta: Graaah!!! Vegeta suddenly jumps out of the water, his body full of energy Vegeta: Cheap trick! Teleporting me underwater, Coward! Cut the act and give up already! You're nothing compared to me! Shadow snaps his finger again, this time teleports Vegeta to the Earth's moon. “And now he’s on the moon?” Twilight stuttered, impressed at the distance Shadow could use his teleport ability. Vegeta: Goddamnit. Shadow watches from distance. Shadow: Hmph. Vegeta: Playtime's over, runt! (*Cues: Destruction - Dragon Ball Z*) Vegeta punches the surface of the moon, pushing it closer to Earth. “Did he just punch the moon out of orbit!?” Screamed Luna. Shadow: No! Is he insane!? “No, he just really hates to lose.”explained Rainbow Dash. Shadow takes off his inhibitor rings, glows bright red, shouts "CHAOS... CONTROL!", and then teleports the moon back to it's place. Shadow: Yes. I did it! Vegeta: Congrats, furball. Shadow: It's time to end this! Shadow glows bright red, shouts "CHAOS... BLAST!", then clenches his entire body before throwing out his arms like wings. But it doesn't affect Vegeta, because Shadow's Super form wears off. “That’s not good,” Rarity said, knowing Shadow had a limit to his super form. Shadow: Uh-oh. Vegeta: Sayonara. Vegeta fires the Final Flash at Shadow, vaporizing the latter into the same shade of his quills, smoke. K.O.! Results (*Cues: Heroic Trunks - Dragon Ball Z*) Boomstick: Oh, somebody call PETA, we're down a hedgehog! “What’s PETA?” questioned Rarity. “Sounds pretentious,” Fluttershy surprisingly Snarked. Wiz: With Super Shadow's godly power and invulnerability, the question wasn't if Vegeta could kill Shadow, it was if Vegeta could survive Super Shadow. “He did die two times if you remember correct,” Rarity said, realizing what the hosts were suggesting. Boomstick: But Vegeta's proven time after time he can take one hell of a beating and lasted long enough for Shadow to turn back to normal, giving Vegeta the opening he needed. Wiz: His loud mouth certainly helped him in his past, too. “Agreed,” the group said, Boomstick: Looks like Shadow's time was up. Wiz: The winner is Vegeta. END! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Boomstick: Next time on Death Battle. They see a red cap with an M on it and Blue eyes. They then see a familiar chubby man they've heard about him many times through previous fighters backstories, and now he's the next combatant. They then see a blue hedgehog with green eyes, red and white shoes, a cocky smirk that reminded some of them of a certain blue mare, and they see him running across the fields at high speeds. It was the same hedgehog that was fighting alongside Shadow. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ “Hey I just noticed something,” Rainbow said, getting everyone’s attention. “What’s that Dash?” asked Applejack “I haven’t seen Starlight in a while,” Rainbow said, causing her friend’s eyes to go wide. “Well she’s been at the Crystal Empire visiting Sunburst,” explained Twilight before she adopted a confused look, “though she was supposed to be back by now.” “Wasn’t she suppose to to be there for a week?” Spiked asked, scratching his head in confusion. “She should have been back yesterday at the latest,” Twilight said, remembering the time of her arrival. “I wonder where in the world is Starlight Glimmer.” wondered Pinkie Pie while wearing a red oversized fedora. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~With Starlight Glimmer.~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ We cut to a scene in the middle of a tundra where a train has fallen off it’s tracks. The passenger carriages were all either crushed, ripped apart or on fire as a small pile of debris started to move. Suddenly a pink furred, purple maned with an aqua streak pushed the debris off of her. “Thank harmony, I was conveniently the only one on the train,” Starlight said, gasping for breathe. “Ok, now I need to get to the nearest town.” ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Back with the group ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ “Meh she’ll be fine. She probably wanted to stay an extra day or two. She’ll be back before we know it,” shrugged Twilight. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ CHAPTER END. NEXT TIME MARIO VS SONIC.
Mario VS SonicWe see our group and two sisters gathered in front of the TV preparing to finish the last episode for the day. “Ok everyone let’s watch the final episode for today,” declared Twilight getting a few nods of agreement. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Interlude (*Cues: Invader - Jim Johnston*) Wiz: Their rivalry is legendary and their fame unmatched. After battling for over two decades, this epic duel will finally meet a decisive end. “Two decades!?” everyone marveled. “This must be some rivalry,” Celestia said, shocked that it would take them twenty years to settle a fight. Boomstick: I've been waiting for this forever! “Guess Boomstick wanted to do this one?” Applejack said, wondering what they’re in for. “Everypony has something they want to see,” Rainbow lazily said. “Personally I would love to see a battle royale that doesn’t involve families killing each other,” she said, as everyone but the princesses nodded sadly. Wiz: Mario, the whimsical Italian plumber... “A plumber? How could a plumber be able to put up a fight?” Rarity asked, a little underwhelmed “Never underestimate a plumber,” warned Pinkie Pie. while she was wearing a red hawaiian shirt. Boomstick: ...and Sonic, the hyperactive hedgehog. “So this is Shadow’s rival?” spike asked, already seeing a major difference in the two hedgehogs. “Heh he doesn't look tough at all,” Rainbow dash added in. Wiz: I'm Wizard and he's Boomstick, and it's our job to analyze their weapons, armor and skills to find out who would win a Death Battle. Mario (*Cues: Buoy Base Galaxy - Super Mario Galaxy*) Wiz: Mario is one of the star children and possesses many special abilities with the intent of protecting his home, the Mushroom Kingdom. Even as a baby, he was obviously destined for greatness. Boomstick: When you've got an army of dinosaurs serving you before you can even speak, you know you're gonna do great things. “Aw, look at him with the Yoshis,” Fluttershy said, cooing at both baby Mario and the Yoshis. Wiz: He is well known for his incredible athleticism and unmatched jumping ability. “But he seems so… plump,” Rarity commented. Making sure to word it nicely as to not come off as rude. Boomstick: Who says white guys can't jump? “Huh? Sounds like something i used to hear earth pony guards say about unicorns back in the castle,” noted Twilight. “Sigh… guess i have to have a talk with the guards about racial profiling,” facehooved Celestia. Wiz: Plus, he's a powerhouse, with the strength to lift heavy objects and crush enormous castles. He also uses his bare fists to smash solid brick. Background Height: 5'1" Can Jump Over 20 Feet ( that surprised the group, that such a plump person could jump that high.) High Stamina Superhuman Strength Superhuman Durability Skilled Combatant “Wooowy! The only one I know who can smash brick is Big Mac and Pinkie’s sister!” marveled Applejack. “Ooh! I should get Maud to join us sometime!” cheered Pinkie pie. Boomstick: With his jumping skills and weight, he can pound and crush his foes into oblivion, and if he needs some extra firepower, well, he's got his entire arsenal of power-ups! Wiz: His first power-up is the Fire flower. With it, Mario obtains pyrokinetic abilities. “A flower?” Luna asked, “How would a flower help him?” “We’ll find out in a moment, Luna,” Celestia said, taking a bite out of a piece of cake. Boomstick: Really? I always thought the flower was just really spicy. “That's a Spicy Meat-a-BALL!” said Pinkie Pie, while wearing a thick fake mustache. (*Cues: Bowser's Lava Lair - Super Mario Galaxy 2*) Fire Flower Grants Pyrokinesis Can Create & Manipulate Fire Bouncing Fireballs Ends After Absorbing 1 Deadly Blow Wiz: He can create and manipulate fire to produce a variety of devastating attacks. “Interesting,” Twilight muttered, wondering if this flower really exists. “Interesting? I say awesome, I wish I could do something like that,” Spike said excitedly. Being a dragon, Spike liked to see all kinds of different fire attacks. “And i must say, I’m quite interested in how it changes his outfits colors,” added in rarity. Fascinated with how the plumber’s outfit changed colors as soon as he touched the flower. Boomstick: He's also got this frog suit thingy. While wearing it, Mario can jump even higher, swim even faster, and breathe underwater. The only problem is no one's really gonna take him seriously wearing that thing. Ha ha! Ah, look at him! Frog Suit Increases Jump Height Increases Swimming Speed Can Breathe Underwater Resists Water Currents for Better Control Looks Absolutely Ridiculous! Everyone laughed at how silly the Italian plumber looked in the suit. “I wish I could see the look on his enemies face when they see him,” Rainbow said, causing everyone to laugh at the mental images they got. Wiz: Several different power-ups have granted Mario flight before, but none as well as the Cape Feather. With it, Mario can fly for an unprecedented amount of time. “Whoa! This guy can fly now!?” asked a shocked Rainbow dash. “Flying seems to be the norm lately with a lot of this battles,” chimed in Applejack. Cape Feather Wears a Yellow Cape Can Fly for Unprecedented Amounts of Time Can Deflect Projectiles Razor-Sharp Edge Boomstick: The Metal Cap turns Mario's entire body into indestructible living steel. But while Metal Mario's extremely heavy, his strength and speed are boosted, giving him ten times more power and just as much agility as before. “Something that coats you in steel but makes you faster as well?” asked a confused Twilight, who was about to go on a long lecture about how that’s impossible but a comforting hoof from her mentor calmed her down. “Remember my former student, there are types of magic out there that i don’t even know about,” said the princess of the sun to her former student, who nodded in understanding. Metal Cap Becomes Living Metal Nearly Indestructible Incredibly Heavy Power Increase Speed and Maneuverability Remain Unchanged Wiz: The Starman envelops Mario into a blinding aura of compressed energy, granting increased speed and complete invulnerability for a short time. Touching a normal enemy in this state will instantly kill the foe. And while it's not technically a power-up, Mario has a hammer that can crush almost ANYTHING. Starman Invulnerable Increases Speed Instantly Kills Foes Short Time Limit “That star power almost looks like our Rainbow power,” Fluttershy said, getting a few nods in agreement when the rest of the group saw the similarities. Though i’d like to see this Star power can take out a centaur who has all the magic of Equestria,” challenged Rainbow dash. Not willing to admit something could beat their Ace in the hole. Boomstick: It seems like Mario's always popping 'shrooms to get more power. And with the Mega Mushroom, he gets GINORMOUS, mowing down people, plants, environment, hell, everything! “I could throw a GIANT monster party with those!!” yelled the Pink party pony in excitement. “Let’s never let her get her hooves on those mushrooms,” Spike said to the rest of the group getting everyone to agree it would be a bad idea. Mega Mushroom Mario Grows Giant Invulnerable Can Smash Through Almost Any Obstacle Lasts for a Short Time Wiz: Mario has battled a larger variety of enemies than any other video game hero. Whether a foe is large or small, scary or goofy, dumb or deadly, nothing has ever proved too much for him. “Oh my! He really is a great hero to defend his kingdom,” praised Celestia. With her younger sister agreeing with her. “Quit true dear sister, and in a way he reminds me of our own heroes.” Luna agreed while looking at the young group of ponies and one dragon with a smile, getting one from her older sister as well. Boomstick: Except for keepin' track of his woman. She's always gettin' kidnapped and he's always showing up at the wrong castle. Somebody needs to throw a GPS tracking bracelet on that bitch! The girls decided to not comment on the that little line. Wiz: He is fairly impulsive and not much of a strategist, preferring to quickly fight his way through problems before thinking things through. While twilight would usually talk down about those kind of strategies, she has learned threw her time living with her friends had taught her that different strategies worked for different people and her way wasn’t always the right way. Boomstick: But that doesn't matter, Italy's greatest hero can power through anything! That was something the group could agree on after hearing about Mario's feats in this episode. Mario: "It's-a me, Mario!" “Hi Mario!!” everyone welcomed, before busting out into laughter. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ After hearing about his skills and history, the group agreed that mario was indeed a great hero and they couldn't wait to see who he was battling. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Sonic (*Cues: Sonic 3 & Knuckles - Robotnik Theme (Orchestral)*) Wiz: Sonic the Hedgehog is the fastest thing alive, and a freedom fighter battling to save the world from the tyrannical Dr. Ivo Eggman Robotnik. “The fastest thing alive?” questioned Rainbow Dash, narrowing her eyes at the blue hedgehog. “Well he is Shadow's rival,” Spike reminded the blue mare. Confused on why she was getting so hostile with the Blue blur, when she freely admitted that Shadow was faster than her. “Ya but Shadow is a really cool dude, unlike this blue loser!” pouted the Blue mare. “Is it just me or is Rainbow Dash acting weird?” Applejack whispered to Rarity “Beats me,” answered Rarity, just as confused. Boomstick: He's not so bad for a tree-hugging hippie. “What's wrong with tree hugging?” asked Fluttershy innocently. Wiz: Sonic's most notable ability is his speed. He can easily break the sound barrier in mere seconds. While his top speed is unknown, he has clocked in an average of 765 mph. Background Height: 3'3" Weight: 77 lbs. Age: 16 Freedom Fighter Top Speed: Unknown Average of 765 mph Figure 8 Technique “Big deal! You girls have seen me do that before,” ranted the Blue mare. The group agreeing with her after seeing it for themselves multiple times. “But they said that’s not his fastest speed though,” twilight said only to reserve a glare from the rainbow mare before she went back to glaring at the screen. Not only confusing the lavender princess but the rest of her friends as well. Though the two princesses couldn't help but smirk at the young blue mare with knowing looks, and amusement dancing in their eyes. Boomstick: Holy crap! This guy must blow through shoes. “What are this “shoes” boomstick speaks of?” asked Luna, while the others wondered as well. Wiz: He can further increase his speed with his trademark figure 8 technique. “Wow his legs are moving so fast it looks like an infinity symbol!” Marveld Twilight. “Pfft big deal.”snarked Rainbow Dash. Boomstick: But he's not just fast on his feet. He can curl up into a spiky ball and rip through his opponents with the spin attack. “Huh? But hedgehogs can’t do that…” muttered Fluttershy. “Well he’s not an ordinary Hedgehog,” commented Spike. Wiz: His homing attack rockets toward an opponent and can hit multiple times. “Doesn't beat flying though,” bragged Rainbow Dash, getting a few eye rolls for her constant remarks against the blue runner. Boomstick: And with his spin dash, he can reach top speeds almost instantly. How does this guy not vomit? “Probably from a lot of pratice,” Luna theorized. Attacks & Techniques Spin Attack Spin Dash Homing Attack Light-Speed-Dash Martial Arts (that caught Dash’s attention.” Can Burrow Underground (*Cues: Sonic 3 - Final Boss Theme (Orchestral)*) Wiz: During his adventures, he has used a variety of different shields to improve his abilities. Each shield can deflect minor projectiles and have environmental advantages, though they will disintegrate after blocking a deadly blow. “Well at least they do their job,” Celestia commented. “Maybe they would still be worth learning on how to make?” Questioned Luna. getting a nod from her sister. Boomstick: The Fire Shield can absorb, well, fire and heat, though it can't survive underwater. No shit! But with it, Sonic can use a fiery dash attack. Fire Shield Impervious to Fire & Heat Fiery Makeup Disintegrates in Water Mid-Air Dash Attack “That’s pretty cool.” Applejack said. “Don’t you mean “Hot”?” giggled Pinkie Pie, only to get groans from her friends in return. Wiz: The Lightning Shield can't survive in aquatic environments either, but it gives Sonic a mid-air jump for further aerial control. “Interesting.” Twilight said but Rainbow Dash rolled her eye’s Lightning Shield Impervious to Electricity Electric Makeup Disintegrates in Water Magnetic Field Mid-Air Jump Boomstick: And with the Bubble Shield, he can breathe underwater and control his jumps with a powerful bounce. Why do we keep mentioning water, you may ask? 'Cause he can't freakin' swim! Bubble Shield Can Breathe Underwater Water and Air Makeup Bounce Attack Bouncing Can Increase Jump Height “Ha! What kind of loser can’t swim!” Rainbow was quick to mock, maybe a little TOO quickly some of her friends thought. “Man dash, why do you gotta hate the guy so much? It’s almost like you li-!!” Applejack rant died in her throat as a look of realisation makes it’s way on her face, before it’s quickly replace with a look of amusement. “What’s with that look A.J?” asked the blue mare. Wondering why her southern friend was giving her a smug look. “Y-you, snrk! Y-you l-l-l-l- HAHAHAHAHA!!” laughed the apple mare as tears of mirth ran down her cheeks as her laughter went to hysterical levels. “My word Applejack, what's the matter with you?” question Rarity while the others wondered what was up with the cowpony. “S-she LIKES him!” laughed the farm mare as she fell into another fit of laughter. The rest of the mane six and spike stared wide eyed before turning their attention towards Rainbow dash to see her glaring at Applejack while also sporting a huge blush across her face, proving the farm mares claim. “Not. A. Word!” growled out the blue mare but it was for not, as her friends busted out laughing along with their southern friend and even the two sisters giggled at the pout Rainbow Dash was now sporting. Wiz: Sonic's ultimate power-up, however, isn't a shield at all. After absorbing thousands of power rings during his adventures, Sonic has become an embodiment of chaos. That got some concerned looks from everyone in the group as soon as the word “Chaos” was used. (*Cues: Solaris Phase 2 - Sonic the Hedgehog (2006)*) “Wowzers this song is cool!” cheered the pink pony while the others in the group were enjoying the inspiring song. Wiz: Using the power of the seven Chaos Emeralds, Sonic can tap into their incredible power and summon the form of Super Sonic. “Just like Shadow!” declared Spike. “Oh my~ seems like you chose yourself a Golden boy there,” teased Rarity. Wich only to serve to make Rainbow Dash’s blush to grow bigger. Boomstick: Super Sonic can fly, breathe underwater, and is completely invulnerable. “Seems like both Shadow and Sonic share the same abilities when in super form,” commented Celestia. Wiz: Not to mention his speed is increased a thousandfold. Boomstick: But as with most things that are unbelievably powerful, it has a time limit. Without a steady supply of power rings, it can't even last a full minute. Super Form 1000% Power Increase Automatic Flight Unlimited Stamina Invincible Positive Energy Aura Duration Based on a Time Limit “So he’s got to make it count,” said Luna with a coagulating look. “Hopefully it will net him the win…” muttered Rainbow dash. Wiz: And when the form finally subsides, Sonic returns to normal at peak physical form, regardless of his condition prior to the transformation. “Well at least it has an upside when it ends,” Twilight said. Happy to see for once a super mode doesn't leave you drained. Boomstick: While Sonic's always risking his life saving the world from all kinds of dangerous robots and demi gods, he's kind of a dick. “Huh?” everyone said. Wiz: Sonic is cocky, arrogant and addicted to action. He gets cranky and unstable when he's cooped up for too long. “Oh wow! You two were just made for eachother sugarcube,” laughed Applejack along with the others. “Oh man…” groaned out the blue mare hiding her blushing face behind her hooves as fluttershy gave her back a few comforting pats. Boomstick: And if you ignore him, hah, he'll straight up leave you! “Wow sounds like your guy is a little needy,” teased Twilight. Getting a glare in return. Wiz: But despite his rough personality, he'll do whatever it takes to save the day. “He’s a hero through and through,” awed Fluttershy Sonic: "Ooh, I'd like to hang, but I've gotta juice!" runs off Wiz: Alright the combatants are set, let's end this debate once and for all. Boomstick: But first, I gotta get me some rocket boots so I can run like Sonic. “I want some too!” yelled Pinkie Pie. Wiz: What? Where are you gonna get the money for rocket boots? Boomstick: Netflix? ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ As the trailers played out the group was quick to choose sides. For team Mario we have Twilight, Spike, Celestia, Applejack, and Fluttershy. And for team Sonic we have Pinkie Pie, Luna, Rarity, and Rainbow dash. Who was being teased by everyone about supporting her crush. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Boomstick: But right now, it's time for a Death Battle! Death Battle (*Cues: Airship Theme - Super Mario Galaxy*) Sonic is calmly sitting in a field when Mario emerges from a pipe. As Sonic leaps back, Mario jumps down in front of him. Sonic: Alright, Chubby! Let's settle this! Mario: Let's-a go! FIGHT! (*Cues: Sonic 3 - Final Boss Remake Orchestrated / Rock*) Sonic attacks Mario with fast combos and sends him onto the pipe he emerged from. Mario produces a fire flower and becomes Fire Mario. Sonic dodges the fireballs that Mario throws at him but gets hit by Mario's fire slide. Mario: Wah-ha! Mario hits Sonic a few times, then grabs him and spins around in a circle while holding him. Rainbow Dash and the group winced with every hit that the red plumber landed. Mario: Here we go! Mario throws Sonic against the pipe. Mario then uses his cape to throw Sonic upwards, allowing him to knock Sonic to the floor, spin him around in a lariat of fire, and throw him backwards. Mario then releases a massive storm of flame, the Mario Finale, but Sonic is unscathed by his flame shield. Sonic used his flame dash attack to hit Mario six times. Mario counters Sonic's dash with his hammer. “This two are evenly match,” muttered Celestia as she watch the two fighter treading hit blow for blow. “Their not giving their opponent even an inch in this fight,” added in luna. (*Cues: Final Bowser Battle - Super Mario Galaxy 2*) A short montage of the fight begins. Sonic throws a punch and Mario dodges it, but Sonic then hits Mario with his homing attack in the air. Mario then uses his Super Jump Punch at Sonic, and afterward Sonic is standing impatiently next to Tanooki Mario's statue form. “It’s just going back and forth with this two,” muttered Twilight. Getting sucked in by the battle. Rainbow dash just gave a worried glance towards her chosen fighter(cough crush cough). After the montage, Sonic is running as Cape Mario flies after him. Sonic activates his thunder shield and dashes over to a volcano with a sad face. Both the hedgehog and the plumber end up inside the volcano, staring at each other on opposite sides. A Bob-omb is caught between them. Alarmed, the Bob-omb informs several other Bob-ombs that their home is being apparently invaded by intruders. “Uh-oh…” everyone squeaked out in fear, all except the Pink party pony who was looking at the Bob-omb with childlike glee. Mario: Mama mia! “Yay! EXPLOSIONS!!” screamed the pink pony in glee. The Bob-ombs exploded, sending Mario and Sonic flying. Sonic lands in a lake but activates his Bubble shield to keep him breathing. However, Frog Mario ground pounds him, deactivating his shield. Sonic tries to jump out of the water, but no avail. “YOU JERK!” yelled the enraged blue mare. (*Cues: Out of Breath - Vivid Sounds x Hybrid Colors: Sonic Colors*) As soon the song plays, knowing he couldn't stay down any longer due to lack of swimming, Sonic tries to run out of the water before he drowns, but his efforts are futile much to Rainbow dash's horror. . Frog Mario swims up into the surface, until... “What's going to happen?” whispered Fluttershy. Sonic: Now I'll show you! (*Cues: Sonic The Hedgehog - Final Boss (Bak.R)*) Super Sonic hits Frog Mario and emerges from the lake. Team sonic cheered as they saw their fighter continue to fight even when it looked like he was done for. Super Sonic: How's that plumber? “YAAAA!! GO SONIC!!” Rainbow cheered, completely ignoring the groups laughter at the mares cheering. Mario: (*gets his Metal cap out*) Woohoo! “Oh… there's that.” muttered the blue mare as she saw the Plumber pull out one of his aces. Mario slaps on his metal cap, becoming Metal Mario. (*Cues: Metal Mario Theme - Super Mario 64*) Super Sonic tries to attack him, but Metal Mario grabs him and throws him aside. Super Sonic tries a few more attacks but to no avail. After Metal Mario sidekicks Super Sonic away, he produces a power star. “Metal cap and a power star?” muttered the princess of friendship. Truly a deadly combo,” added in Luna. (*Cues: Starman Theme - Super Mario Galaxy*) Using the combined powers of the metal cap and the power star, he attacks Sonic with the Mario Tornado, only for the power to suddenly wear off. “The powers must of overloaded each other,” explained Twilight. “Well that's good for sonic,” Rarity says relieved. Super Sonic: So you're tougher than I thought, huh? Now it's time for me to finish... this... “What he doing?” everyone wondered Mario produces a Mega Mushroom and becomes Mega Mario. “Crap…” team sonic muttered. Super Sonic/ Rainbow Dash: Whoa... (*Cues: Sonic 3 - Final Boss Theme (Orchestral)*) Super Sonic continuously attacks Mega Mario, but his attacks do very little. Instead, Mega Mario punches Super Sonic away and the power of the Chaos Emeralds wears off, causing Super Sonic to return to peak physical bluish form. Sonic/Rainbow Dash: Uh-oh. “Well at least he’s not exhausted anymore,” Fluttershy said. Sonic falls to the floor. His only option is to run as Mega Mario gives chase after he uses the Figure 8 technique. Sonic: You're too slow! “Go sonic go!” yelled Rainbow Dash while the rest of the team cheered for the blue blur. “Go Mario!!” cheered Team Mario. Sonic outruns Mega Mario, who returns to normal size, albeit a bit dizzy. “Oh no…” muttered Twilight. “What’s happening Twi?” asked Pinkie. Not understanding why Mario looked so dizzy. “While Mario might have more forms that grant him invincibility then sonic, none of them recharge him like sonic’s super form!” explained Twilight mutch to the horror of her teammates. “So you're saying…” trailed off spike, dread slowly feeling his voice. “While sonic just got a recharge, Mario is running on empty right now,” concluded Celestia. Mario: D'oh! After Mario was worn out, Sonic then returns back to the red capped plumber. “He’s got this!” Luna yelled in excitement along with Rainbow Dash. Sonic/Rainbow dash: Now's my/you’re chance! Sonic knocks Mario back and forward with the spin attack, while mid-air, Sonic then Axel Kicks Mario to the ground and spindashes the back of the downed plumber. The blue speedy hedgehog then jumps off of the bloodied red capped plumber. "hisss ooh" everyone winced at the brutal death and hearing Marios scream. K.O.! Results (*Cues: Greenhill Zone - (Videogame Orchestra)*) Boomstick: Now that's what I call a Death Battle! “Yeah, it was awesome how Sonic was fighting Mega Mario,” Rainbow said, throwing a few punches in the air. “Y’all had to root for your coltfriend, huh?” Applejack asked with a grin on her face. “SHUT. UP,” Rainbow growled, getting tired of the joke while blushing. Wiz: Their power-ups seemed evenly matched, countering blow for blow. Boomstick: Mario was even capable of countering the unstoppable Super Sonic! “That was a bit nerve wracking,” Rarity said, fanning herself. Wiz: But with their arsenals exhausted, Mario was no match for Sonic's natural speed. Even if they had used their lesser known power-ups like the ice flower or Super Emeralds, there's no reason to say the result would be any different. “You can only rely one power for so long,” Celestia said, having seen that happen before. Boomstick: Looks like Mario just couldn't keep up. this time it was both Pinkie AND Rainbow Dash who laughed at Boomstick's Joke. Wiz: The winner is Sonic the Hedgehog. END! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Boomstick: Next time on Death Battle! the screen is filled with mist as beautiful music started playing and an image of a lightning bolt appears on screen then a the scene switches to a young boy with black hair, glasses and a lighting bolt scar on his forehead. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ “Thank you Twilight for having us over again,” Celestia said while Luna nodded quietly. “Of course, Celestia. We’re always happy to have you over,” Twilight said, smiling a bit. “I wish you didn’t have to leave so soon,” she said, as her friends voiced their agreement. “We wish we could as well but we’re needed at the castle. Our nephew can only handle so much until even he snaps,” Luna said, imagining the blonde pulling his hair and wishing for his aunts to return. That caused a few ponies to snicker at that. Just as the princesses were about to leave, the box near them started to glow causing the sister to look at it curiously. The others had excited looks on their faces as Pinkie ran over and opened said box with the enthusiasm of a foul on hearth's warming day. “What’s inside the box this time?” Twilight said as the princesses looked on curiously. Pinkie stood up and said, “More comics and hats!!!” she cheered as she put on a copy of Mario’s hat. Red M and all that. Apple snickered and said, “Rainbow should get the comics. Ain’t right to keep her away from her crush.” This caused everyone in the room to snicker at the blue speedster. “Ha ha ha. Very funny,” Rainbow grumbled as she took the comics and a Sonic hat from the box. She then flew out an open window and towards her home as the others all said their goodbyes. With everyone gone, Spike went to Twilight and asked, “Hey, Twi. Have you heard anything from Starlight yet?” “No I haven’t, but I’m sure she’s fine. Besides what can go wrong for her?” Twilight asked, unaware she jinxed her friend/student. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Where in the world is Starlight Glimmer? ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ We find Starlight wondering in the frozen tundra of the Crystal empire as she tried to hold on to a worn out map. The cold was getting to her while the harsh winds made it a bit difficult to read the map. “Ok~ was I supposed to make a right at the mountain of doom or a left at the lake of frozen tears?” asked the cold mare as she tighten the jacked she brought with her and mad her way towards an ominous looking mountain in the distance. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ CHAPTER END! NEXT TIME LUKE SKYWALKER VS HARRY POTTER.
Luke Skywalker VS Harry Potter.Twilight let out a huge yet sad sigh as she just stared at the window. The reason for her current state was that all her friends were busy for the day. Applejack had to tend to her farm, Rarity needed to work on some orders, Fluttershy had to take care of her animal friends, Rainbow was strangely absent while Pinkie was planning a party. “Oh come on, Twi. We can still watch an episode if you want,” Spike said, poking her sides. “I know Spike, but it’s not the same without our friends being here,” Twilight said, not moving an inch. “Twi, you have to stop mopping. So what if we don’t have any of our friends here. It’s not like a solution is just gonna knock on our door or something,” Spike said, waving his arms in the air. Then suddenly, as if god heard their plea, a loud yet rapid knocking noise was coming from their front door. Twilight looked at Spike with a look that screamed “”Really?” “It’s probably just Derpy delivering the mail,” Spike said, walking towards the door. Once he was a foot away from the door, it suddenly opened and knocked Spike into the wall. A pony walked through the doorway wearing a purple hat and cape as she said, “The Great and Powerful Trixie ...would like to know where her friend is.” Twilight shook her head and looked at the new arrival. “What do you mean Trixie?” Twilight asked confused. The blue showpony said, “I’ve been waiting for the last three days for Starlight to return from her trip. I’ve heard nothing from her and thought you might of.” “Sorry Trixie, but we haven’t heard anything from her,” Twilight said, wondering what her friend/student was doing at the moment. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~where in the world is Starlight Glimmer~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Starlight could only gawk as she stared at the never ending horizon of sand in front of her. A completely different terrain from the snowy landscape we saw her in beforehand. “HOW!?” the young mare cry’d. Completely confused on how she ended up in the DESERT of all places. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ “She’s probably having fun wherever she is,” Spike said, waving his hand dismissively. “Who’s having fun?” two voices said behind Spike. Looking back at the doorway, the three see two ponies just standing there. The first one was a black and white striped mare wearing a few pieces of gold jewelry with a mohawk. The other one was a creamed colored mare with a red mane that had a purple stripe. The most distinct features of this mare was that she had a black sweater and a braid for the top of her head. They were Zecora, the resident potion maker, and Moondancer, Twilight’s old friend, respectively. “Zecora! Moondancer! It’s good to see you, but why are you two hear?” asked the princess of friendship. “Hello Twilight, I came to drop off some more potions for you and to see if your alright.” rhymed the Zebra sage. “And i came over for a surprise visit,” said Moondancer with a smile as she adjusted her glasses. “And I guess I wasted my time coming here,” muttered Trixie. While Twilight was trying to think on what to do with the three unexpected visitors. But before she could think of anything, spike tapped her shoulder to get her attention. “Why not let them stay?” Spike asked, gaining everypony’s attention. “They can watch an episode with us and it could be fun to see how they react to it.” “Well…” Twilight said, feeling a bit unsure. “C’mon, it’ll be fun,” Spike said, grinning happily while holding his arm out wide. Twilight thought it over for a moment, trying to weigh the pros and cons. She did want to see the next episode and her friends did say they’ll watch it later. Besides it would be nice to spend time with some of her other friends. With that in mind, Twilight looked at new guests and nodded. “Your right Spike,” Twilight said smiling. “How about it, do you want to watch a show with us?” The three mares gave her a questioning look before they decided to see what the Princess of friendship wanted to show them. And once they all made it to the ballroom, twilight was quick to get them to seat in front of the television and hit play. Interlude (*Cues: Invader - Jim Johnston*) The three mares jump at the sudden intense music and marveled at the title screen. Twilight and Spike couldn't help but laugh a little at their reaction. Wiz: Every generation has idolized a Sci-Fi hero. “So it’s a battle between heroes?” questioned Trixie not really sure she wasted to see two heroes kill each other, The other two mares unknowingly thinking the same thing. Boomstick: Like Luke Skywalker, Legacy of the Jedi… “That’s a really mystic sounding title,” commented Moondancer. Getting a nod from the other two unicorns and one drake, but Zecora was giving the screen a strange look.” Wiz: ...and Harry Potter, the Boy who lived. “Why does that title feel like it has so much sadness behind it?” asked Twilight. Boomstick: He's Wiz and I'm Boomstick. Wiz: And it's our job to analyze their weapons, armor, and skills to find out who would win a Death Battle. Luke Skywalker (*Cues: Star Wars Rogue Squadron III - Mission Complete*) Wiz: As the orphaned son of Darth Vader, Luke Skywalker carries the blood of the most powerful sith lord ever known. He was raised by his aunt and uncle, who kept him safe by disguising his true powers before being taught by a wise old mentor in the ways of the force. The girls and one drake could not help but feel bad for someone who lived their life not knowing one day, they would have a great Burden thrust upon them. “The poor soul has such a great burden,” muttered Moondancer. “It’s truly sad to see someone struggling, while also greatly Hurting.” rhymed Zecora. “The great and sadden Trixie agrees,” added in Trixie. Background Height: 5'7" Weight: 169 Ibs Raised as a Farmer Prosthetic Right Hand Son of Anakin Skywalker, the Chosen One Married to Mara Jade Boomstick: Luke's weapon of choice is the Lightsaber, a combination of my two favorite killing tools: swords and lasers. Lightsaber Custom Built Approx. 4 Ft. Blade Cuts Through Most Objects Based on Kenobi's Saber Expends No Heat or Energy Until Physical Contact Uses Form V (Djiem So) “Ooh~,” marveled Twilight. Eyes sparkling with a need to study it. “Oh boy, seems like Princess has found a new toy to study,” snarked Trixie. “(giggle) reminds me of the time a new spell would be shown to us in class back in school,” giggled MoonDancer. Getting a few laughs from Spike and Zecora. Wiz: Despite having little formal training, Luke advanced in lightsaber combat much faster than any other Jedi. “So a natural born prodigy huh?” MoonDancer asked. Zecora was about to answer her but before the zebra could utter a single word the world froze and all color was gone. “Deadman what are you doing?” the disembodied voice of Trepp asked. “I’m just going to tweak a few things in this world to get the story flowing!” replied the angry voice of said hot head (HA get it!?). “You know that will just catches Harmony's attention a lot sooner right?” questioned the Bored Chaos god. “DON’T CARE!!!” the crazed god screamed in replied, much to his blue friend’s annoyance and with the sounds similar to someone snapping their fingers. The world’s color returned and everything started to move again, and finally Zecora continued to speak. “Only natural when he has the blood of a powerful warrior in his veins,” explained the zebra without rhyming. Boomstick: He even took down a freakin' TIE fighter with it, only a month after he blew up the Death Star. What a badass! “Such skill in such a short amount of time!?” Twilight yelled. It took her years of training to get her where she was right now. “Even the great and powerful Trixie is impressed,” marveled Trixie. Getting nod of agreement from everyone else. Wiz: Luke is a master of Form V (Djiem So), an aggressive combat stance with defensive postures, specializing in both perseverance and pressuring an opponent. “Sounds pretty aggressive.” commented Moondancer. “My kind of fighting style,” commented Trixie with a smirk. Boomstick: Despite what you might think, the lightsaber isn't just for killing; it also works pretty damn well for defense. “So a weapon that beats our weapon’s by a mile is also a good shield?” Deadpanned Trixie. Wiz: Even so, Luke's most instrumental tool is his unrivaled connection to the Force. He can apply it in three aspects: Control, Sense, and Alter; controlling all aspects of the body, sensing and utilizing his surroundings, and altering the environment. The Force Surrounds All Living Things Control - Manipulating the aspects of one's body Sense - Recognizing & immersing in environment Alter - Manipulating subjects & environment This caught the three magic user’s attention, a different form of power was something rare to hear about. Boomstick: Like the mind trick thingy! Oh man... the terrible things I would do with that. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~meanwhile with Rarity.~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ “GODDAMENT BOOMSTICK!!!” screamed an enraged Rarity, scaring a confused Sweetie Bell who was wondering why her big sister was screaming to the heavens with such rage. “And who the heck is Boomstick?” the little filly asked herself as she watch her sister continued to yell profanity into the air. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ (*Cues: Star Wars Episode VI - Sail Barge Assault*) Wiz: When injured or exhausted, he can push his physical limits with the force body ability, and use flash burn to neglect pain until he can mend his wounds with force heal. “What a wide variety of skills to heal oneself,” Zecora said impressed. “It’s good to see someone take the time to learn something that can save one’s life,” agreed Moondancer. Boomstick: Also, Luke uses the force to move things with his mind, with almost no limits! “So like our levitation?” asked the three magic users, not noticing the annoyed look Zecora was sporting after hearing that question. Wiz: Finally, Luke can use Shatterpoint to identify any possible weakness or fracture in a subject. Add just a little pressure with the force... Boomstick: ...and BOOM! They explode faster than a Firestone tire! That made the girls and one dragon pale a little at such a vicious power. Force Abilities Force Persuasion Increased Senses Increased Speed & Strength Force Choke Telekinesis Shatterpoint Wiz: Luke has defeated a wide variety of foes, ranging from stormtroopers to deadly Sith lords, one of which Luke had to construct a second Lightsaber to beat. Boomstick: His shorter red Shoto Saber was made to counter the Sith Luminous' Lightwhip, and it worked pretty damn well. “It always good to think and plane, as to better get around any situation,” Trixie said. Getting a surprised look from Twilight and Spike. “Wow Trixie! That was really wise,” complemented Twilight. Spike nodding his head in agreement “Well of course! You need to do this kind of things when you work as a performer,” bragged Trixie. Wiz: He still carries it, though prefers a single blade over two handed combat. “Well at least he still has it for emergencies,” Zecora said. Shoto Saber Shorter, Red Blade Approx. 2 Ft. Blade Used in Jar'Kai Form Used Sparingly Boomstick: Ha, Ha, penis joke. Anyways, Luke doesn't have an obvious weakness, aside from some pretty serious daddy issues. He doesn't carry a blaster, but unlike other stupid Jedi, he isn't afraid to use one. “Wish more heroes would be willing to do that more,” grumbled Spike. Remembering a few times in his power pony comics where one of the heroes refused to even use a simple pipe to defend themselves when they lost their powers. Wiz: While Luke is no fan of violence, he certainly will not pull any punches. “Just means he won’t be the first to throw the first punch,” commented Moondancer. “Well at least he’s not some hot headed buffoon,” said Trixie. “I wanna learn how to use the force,” Twilight added in. getting a smirk from Zecora after she heard the young alicorn voice her need to learn about the mysterious power of the Force. Luke Skywalker: I am a Jedi, like my father before me. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ The group had to admit that luke was a really strong warrior and Twilight even said he was a well rounded fighter. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Harry Potter (*Cues: Harry Potter - Hedwig's Theme*) Wiz: As an orphan, Harry Potter carries the talents of the most powerful dark wizard ever known: Lord Voldemort. He was raised by his aunt and uncle, who kept him safe by disguising his true power before being taught by a wise old mentor in the ways of magic. “Why does the sound familiar,” Trixie deadpanned. Boomstick: Now why does that sound familiar? “That’s what Trixie said you dumb exploding stick!” snarled Trixie, getting a few laughs from the rest of the group. Background Height: N/A [Tall] Weight: N/A [Skinny] Born July 31, 1980 Half-Blood Wizard Accidentally Cursed to Carry Voldemort's Powers Married to Ginny Weasley Wiz: Harry wields an 11 inch phoenix core holly wand. He has learned many spells and is exceptionally skilled in charms. Wand Length: 11 in. Make: Holly Core: Phoenix Feather Described as "Nice & Supple" Brother to Voldemort's Wand Boomstick: His trademark attack is the disarming charm, Expelleraptamus... or whatever. Wiz: Expelliarmus. Boomstick: ...Which can either knock a weapon away or throw the opponent through the air. “A pretty useful skill to use when you want to end a fight without bloodshed,” said Zecora. “Or to make it easier to kill an opponent who can’t fight back.” countered Trixie darkly. Getting ones like Moondancer and Spike to feel uncomfortable and and those like Zecora and Twilight nod in understanding. Wiz: The Confundus charm temporarily confuses the target, “That could of helped in some situations,” grumbled Twilight thinking about all the times it could of help to just zap her opponents into confusions. (*Cues: Fireworks - Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince (End Credit Version)*) Wiz: Stupefy stuns people, and the shield charm protects Harry from all attacks. “Simple enough,” commented Moondancer as she watch the list of spells being shown on TV. Boomstick: And he can summon anything he wants to him with Accio. *clears throat* Accio money! Accio loose women! Damn! The group didn’t even want to comment on the last one… ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ With Rarity… Again. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ “RAAAAAAAA!!!” screamed Rarity, filled with a sudden rage and flipped the table she was working on. “What now!?” cried Sweetie Bell. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ “Though the money part doesn't sound too bad,” mumbled Trixie. Charms Expelliarmus [Disarms] Confundus [Confuses] Stupefy [Stuns] Protego [Shields] Patronus [Shields from Dark Creatures] Accio [Summons Objects] Wiz: His firebolt is a racing broom that can reach 150 miles per hour in less than 10 seconds. “Meh Rainbow Dash can go faster,” commented Spike, getting some questioning looks from the rest of the group. “What? Just thought if rainbow dash wasn’t her to say it, i might as well do it for her.” explained the young drake. Firebolt Broomstick 0 to 150 mph in 10 seconds Braking Charm Perfect Balance Streamlined Ash Individually Selected Twigs of Aerodynamic Perfection Boomstick: That's even faster than Wiz getting shot down by a woman! That got a round of laughter from the group. Wiz: Right!... wait, no! Back to spells! Harry is also experienced in curses. He destroys objects with Reducto, slashes enemies with Sectumsempra, and controls minds with Imperius. “My kind of spells,” grinned Trixie before getting smacked in the back of the head by a glaring Princess. “No killing magic!” she told a pouting Trixie. Boomstick: And then there's the killing curse... abra cadabra. Wiz: Avada Kedavra. “Ok even i don’t want to learn that spell,” Trixie admitted. “Though it begs the question on why harry knows it.” wondered Moondancer. Boomstick: Oh. That magician wasn't trying to kill me. I guess I should probably go apologize to his family. While most of the group where wide eyed at that little tidbit, Trixie could only facehoof at boomstick stupidity. Curses Reducto [Destroys Objects] Sectumsempra [Slashes] Oppugno [Objects Attack] Imperio [Controls Minds] Crucio [Causes Pain] Avada Kedavra [The Killing Curse] Wiz: While Harry's never used the killing curse, it is implied that he can. It is an instant kill and unblockable. “Well at least it’s only implied,” Moondancer sighed in relief. Boomstick: Unless it hits a wall... or a sword... or anything really. “Unblockable, my flank,” Moondancer said, thinking that was stupid. If a spell is unblockable then it should be unblockable. Wiz: Almost all magic requires a line of sight and eye contact to perform. The killing curse is no exception. “Makes sense, even the most potent of spells have a limit,” explained Twilight. Boomstick: Harry also knows appara... teleporting, and can do it without a wand. “Pretty impressive for someone without a horn,” Trixie admitted. “Even Twilight has a hard time with it,” Spike said as Twilight playfully glared at him. Apparition Teleportation Long Range Instantaneous Does Not Require a Wand Possibly Easier to Do With a Wand Wiz: His training in Occlumency defends his mind from any sort of mental attack or illusion. “Really wish i had that kind of training…” muttered Twilight. Remembering the illusions that Sombra left as a trap, that nearly beaten her. Occlumency Prevents Mind Control & Mind Reading Has Not Mastered, but is Adequate Unconventionally Uses a Fond Memory as a Shield Boomstick: And he's got all sorts of other spells, but I seriously doubt the tickle charm's gonna help him much in the fight, so let's move on. “Pinkie could make it work,” Spike said causing the mares in the room to nod their heads in agreement. Wiz: Harry owns the Cloak of Invisibility, an unrelenting Deathly Hallow that hides the wearer from sight and cannot be detected. “Trixie could use a cloak like that,” Trixie said, marveling at the design. She made a note to see if she could do that to her own cloak. Cloak of Invisibility The Third Deathly Hallow Does Not Wear Out Hides the Wearer Cannot Be Detected Unless the Wearer Allows it Boomstick: Unless he makes a noise or pokes his foot out. Wiz: Harry is a quick draw with his wand and has performed many great feats at very young ages. He has also mastered non-verbal spells. “He would of been a top student along with me and Moondancer back in Celestia’s school of gifted unicorns,” commented Twilight. Getting a nod from the glasses wearing unicorn in agreement. Boomstick: By the time he was 17, he was beating up way more experienced wizards. In the battle for Hogwarts, he had no problem kicking a ton of Death Eater ass. Not to mention, Lord Voldemort himself. Everyone was quite impressed with the skill that some at such a young age had. Wiz: Afterwards, Harry became head of the Dark Wizard Hunting Aura office, even though he is technically a Hogwarts drop-out. Boomstick: He never did finish that seventh year, but I guess if you killed the lord of ultimate evil, you'd get a G.E.D. "Can't argue with that," commented Trixie much to the annoyance of a certain alicorn princess. Harry uses his wand on a candle in a jar, which creates a huge fire. He then uses another spell to put it out. Harry: Crudicio! Wiz: Alright the combatants are set, let's end this debate once and for all. But first, let me recommend Carbonite. Boomstick: For all your Han Solo freezing needs. Wiz: Uh, no Boomstick, it's a website. Boomstick: What? ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ The group agreed that harry was a skilled magic user and had a good chance at winning. And as the ads played everyone quickly form teams. On team Luke we had Twilight and Zecora. And on team Harry, we had Trixie, Spike, and Moondancer. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Boomstick: But right now, it's time for a Death Battle! Death Battle In Cloud City, Luke is standing when he notices Harry Potter walking towards him with his wand drawn. He activates his Lightsaber while Harry stops in his tracks. "This should be good,”Trixie said. FIGHT! Harry: Avada Kedavr... Just as Harry is about to use the killing curse, Luke uses Force Persuasion to stop him. However, Harry manages to break free using occlumency. He then prepares once again to cast the killing curse. “That was smart, trying to stop the battle before it even starts,” commented Twilight. “Too bad Harry has trained against mind control,” added in Trixie. (*Cues: Star Wars Episode III - Battle of Heroes*) Harry: Avada Kedavr... Harry is once again interrupted by Luke, who uses Force Push to knock him back. Luke then leaps towards Harry with his Lightsaber swinging, but Harry uses apparition to teleport away from him. When he reappears, Harry proceeds to fire non-verbal spells at Luke, which he deflects with his Lightsaber. Luke leaps at Harry once again, but he teleports out of the way again. “Man the only time i somepony teleport that much was when Twilight was fighting tirek,” said Spike. Remembering seeing his Sister figure fight the evil centaur in the distance while hr and the rest of the mane six were stuck in a steel cage. Harry: Expelliarmus! He fires that, as well as a few more non-verbal spells, but Luke blocks all of them before using the Force to knock Harry's wand out of his hand. Luke charges at Harry, who teleports to the wand. Harry: Accio Firebolt! “He summoned his broom?” Moondancer questioned. Luke throws his Lightsaber at Harry. Harry: Protego! Protego deflects the Lightsaber, which Luke leaps up to catch. He is suddenly hit by the firebolt, which knocks him back to the ground while Harry is lifted onto it and rides off on it. Harry flies by multiple times while firing his non-verbal spells, all of which Luke is able to deflect or block. Luke then manages to catch Harry and the Firebolt with the Force and causes them to crash downward into the roof. Afterwards, Harry disappears with the aid of the Cloak of Invisibility while Luke is unable to detect his opponent's presence. “Smart,” everyone admitted. (*Cues: Star Wars Battlefront II - Anakin Skywalker/Darth Vader Theme*) Harry: Confundo! Luke throws his lightsaber in the direction where he hears Harry. Harry: Stu... Harry teleports out of the way of the incoming lightsaber. Harry: Stupefy! “Almost reminds me of my battle with Starlight,” commented Twilight as she was reminded of one of her most frustrating battles. Luke rolls to avoid stupefy, then catches his lightsaber and uses Force Push, knocking the Cloak of Invisibility off of Harry. Luke then uses Force Choke, lifting Harry into the air and stopping him from casting any verbal spells. Luke throws his lightsaber towards Harry, who casts a nonverbal spell, which manages to hit the lightsaber’s handle, destroying it. “Well there goes his weapon,” gloated Trixie, but the two members of team Luke just calmly watches the screen. (*Cues: The Battle of Hoth (Part 2) - Star Wars Episode V*) Afterwards, Harry is freed. Harry: Avada Kedavra! Luke rolls once again, evading the killing curse. Harry fires multiple non-verbal spells at Luke, who blocks them using the Force. Harry: Sectumsempra! Luke is caught off-guard by the attack and is left with a wound to his side, “Ha check and mate princess!” gloated Trixie while Moondancer was surprised she beat her alicorn friend in something. “I wouldn't be so sure trixie,” Zecora cutted in with a smile. “Huh?” the three members of team Harry said in confusion. “Just watch,” Twilight said with a smile similar to Zecora’s. but then uses shatterpoint. Over on Harry's forehead, Luke finds the weak point he needs in Harry's iconic lightning bolt scar. Harry's wounds begin to expand, eventually causing blood to spurt from it. Harry screams in agony as Luke takes out his shoto saber with the Force, then throws it at Harry, killing him. Winced at the brutal method that Luke tuke to win. “Man that’s brutal,”Spike winced out, still hearing Harry’s screams in his mind. K.O.! Results (*Cues: Star Wars Episode IV - The Throne Room*) Boomstick: Man, Harry did a surprisingly good job keeping Luke at a distance. “Smart thing to do when your opponent has a sword that can cut through anything.” Zecora said Wiz: But Luke fought smart and tried to finish Harry off quickly with Force Persuasion, but Harry was able to resist thanks to occlumency. "Again a smart move on his part,” Twilight repeated. Boomstick: Then Luke used Force Choke to stop Harry from casting spells. Wiz: And although Luke can dodge the Avada Kedavra, the instantaneous Sectumsempra curse caught him off-guard. But with Shatterpoint, Luke discovered an exploitable flaw. The group still winced at the brutal attack from earlier. Boomstick: That famous lightning bolt scar, which Forced Harry to lose the battle. “... stupid,” muttered Trixie at hearing Boomsticks pun. Wiz: The winner is Luke Skywalker. END. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ (this episode didn’t have a preview for the next battle.) ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ After the episode was done each of the three members said their goodbyes to their lavender friends and one little Drake, and Twilight handed out some gifts that the Magic Box produced. For the three magic users: they each got the complete set of the Harry Potter books. For Spike: he was given a few star wars comics. And Zecora was given a crystal Necklaces that was supposed to be like the ones that force users used to make lightsabers. And with that Twilight waved her friends of as she made her way to her room to start reading her new set of books. ~~~~~~~~~~~~ an hour later, Zecora’s hut. ~~~~~~~~~~~~ As Zecora made her way into her hut she quickly made herself some herbal tea and sat down near the fire. Enjoying the calm atmosphere that she was wrapped in. After taking a sip of her tea, she let out a soft chuckle as she closed her eye’s. “How odd, I didn’t think when I woke up today i would be seeing a show that featured ANOTHER force user,” Zecora idly commented as a cylinder shaped object floated near her and with a loud hiss a green blade shot out of it. “I wonder how old master Yoda is doing,” wondered Zecora as she took another sip of her tea. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Chapter end! Next time, Chun-li vs Mai shiranui.
Chun-Li VS Mai Shiranui.We find the full group back together at the usual spot ready to continue watching the otherworldly show and maybe learn something about themselves and- “You're rambling again Mr. narrator,” interrupted Pinkie Pie. Wait no! We’re not doing this again! “Sorry but last chapter was late so we need to move on,” she apologised. B-but life lessons! “We’re not here for life lessons!” she yelled. “We’re here to see fighters kill each other or in the reader’s case, watch Rarity go crazy because of Boomy’s pervy commentary on today’s fighter!” she continued. B-but!!! “No buts! We’r skipping to the story!” the pink pony said as she grabbed the remote. Son of a BI-!!! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Interlude (*Cues: Invader - Jim Johnston*) Wiz: When it comes to fighting, combatants come in all shapes and sizes. Boomstick: And I'm liking the shapes and sizes on these two. “Oh sweet Celestia no,” Rarity whispered in complete horror. Wiz: Chun-Li, the strongest woman in the world… “I wouldn’t mind fighting her,” Rainbow said, taking the title as a challenge. Boomstick: And Mai Shiranui, the queen of fighters. “A queen!? Maybe we should of brought the princesses over,” Pinkie Pie suggested. “You know to continue that whole royalty joke the author thought he was clever by using?” she said cheekily towards the reader. Bite me. Wiz: He's Boomstick and I'm Wizard and it's our job to analyze their weapons, armor, and skills to find out who would win a Death Battle. Chun-Li (*Cues: Street Fighter II - China Street Beat: OcRemix*) Wiz: Chun-Li, first lady of the fighting game. Boomstick: Famous for abusing the Thigh Master. “What’s a thigh master?” Applejack said, getting nothing but shrugs. Wiz: Chun-Li is a detective for Interpol, and has gone through a rudimentary police combat training. She has also trained with Gen, a friend of her father's and legend of the Chinese Fighting Underworld. “A detective, huh,” Rarity said, taking a good look at her. “She doesn’t look like one but I love her outfit.” “It is fancy looking,” Spike said, blushing as he imagined his crush wearing the outfit. Boomstick: But she never did finish her training with him. Does anyone ever finish their training? Seriously! Well, I guess it's not totally her fault, after Bison killed her dad, Gen just kinda disappeared on her. What a dick! “What kind of teacher just walks out on his student when they need them most?” seethed Twilight. Angered at the fact that Chun-li’s teacher would do that. Rainbow Dash was also glaring at the screen, she would never stop teaching Scootaloo how to fly unlike this guy who walked out his student. Wiz: Since then, Chun-Li's been chasing after Bison for vengeance. She has trained in defense of Tai Chi, and is skilled in a fast-paced kickboxing variant of Kenpo. She prefers speed over strength, using a combination of rapid strikes to pressure an opponent. Background Height: 5'6" Weight: Secret Detective for Interpol Trained with Gen Skilled in Tai Chi & Kenpo Bust/Waist/Hip: 34" / 22" / 35" “Vengeance is never the answer,” Twilight said, shaking her head sadly. “Her fighting styles seem interesting though.” “If we can learn them, I wouldn’t mind knowing a few moves,” Rainbow said, liking Chun Li’s speed. Boomstick: And if you can't tell by looking at 'em, her legs are pretty damn powerful. She can even kick people through solid brick. Still, her strength doesn't just lie in those legs. She's strong enough to toss things around as big as a couch. “She’d be welcomed in the Apple household,” Applejack said, feeling she could get along with the fighter. “She could help me with my animal friends,” Fluttershy (*Cues: Chun-Li's Theme - Steet Fighter Third Strike China*) Wiz: Her main attacks include the unbelievably fast Lightning Legs, the unpredictable Axe Kick, and the physics defying Spinning Bird Kick. “Holy cow! I gotta admit that’s an interesting way to fly,” Rainbow said. Not caring that it looked silly, anyone who can pull that off was cool in her book. Boomstick: I wouldn't mind taking a ride on that helicopter! “Sorry mister but you're not allowed on this ride,” growled out Rarity. Attacks Lightning Legs Axe Kick [Hazanshu] Spinning Air Kick Stomp Kick Spinning Bird Kick Senretsu Kyaku Wiz: She can also focus her natural Ki energy to create the Kikoken, a slow, limited ranged attack. “At least she has a ranged attack,” Pinkie said, not looking to impressed with the attack. Boomstick: And the Kikosho is basically a super version of that: an enormous ball of energy strong enough to stop a speeding car. The group didn’t know what a car was but it still sounded impressive. Ki Attacks Kikoken Kikosho Wiz: Her detective skills were instrumental in taking down the criminal organization, Shadaloo; and after the tournaments, Chun-Li became a martial arts teacher. However, she has yet to win any major tournament, and failed to kill Bison to avenge her father. She was able to rescue one of her students from Urien, but turns out Urien let her win, wanting only to test her skills. “She defeated a criminal organization? That’s pretty cool,” Spike said, imaging her as a hero. “It’s nice to see that she’s teaching others. It feels good to know that you’re helping the younger generation learn how to defend themselves,” Twilight said, seeing herself in Chun Li somewhat. Boomstick: Also, it seems Chun ends up having to be rescued a lot, usually by Guile. “Teehee I smell shipping~” Rarity sang. Wiz: Oddly enough, her most noble award is placing sixth in an International Shooting Competition, despite rarely carrying a gun. “That’s impressive for a gal who barely carries a weapon on her,” complemented Applejack. Feats Took down Shadaloo Christened the "Strongest Woman in the World" Honorary X-Men member Martial Arts Teacher Never Defeated Bison Defeated Urien [Kind of] Boomstick: Well, I guess things wouldn't be too fair if she brought a gun to a Street Fight. Round One... BANG! WINNER! “Wish we could do that with our rainbow power’s.” muttered Fluttershy. Wiz: Despite this, Chun-Li is certainly capable of holding her own, and has been consistently proven to be one of the toughest contenders in the Street Fighter tournaments. Chun-Li: You ready for this? ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ After a close discussion, the girls agreed that Chun Li was strong despite having a few flaws. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Mai Shiranui (*Cues: Flame Dragon God 'Theme of Mai Shiranui' (Arranged) - Fatal Fury Special*) Wiz: Mai Shiranui is... well... Boomstick: Holy crap, look at those things! Rarity was half tempted to pull out the bottle of wine she brought with her right her and now. Wiz: Mai is a ninja of the Shiranui Clan and has been trained by both her grandfather and the perverted, yet famously deadly, Jubei Yomato. “And her grandfather trusted her with that shameless lecher.” demanded Rarity. Boomstick: He brought a whole new meaning to 'wax on, wax off'! This confused everyone as they didn’t understand what that meant but Rarity felt like she should be angry anyway. Wiz: She has extensive training in the Shiranui Ryu fighting styles. From her grandfather, Mai learned the Koppo-ken technique, specializing in pressure points and bone snapping. With Jubei, Mai trained in close-combat Judo. Boomstick: Mai's pretty fast, but focuses on single powerful strikes to punch through an enemy's defenses. The only downside to this is if she misses one, she's left wide open. (chuckles) “Don’t think I didn’t catch that one Boomstick!” yelled Rarity, feeling a head Height: 5'5" Weight: 106 Ibs Shiranui Clan Ninja Trained by Grandfather & Jubei in Hoppo-ken & Judo Bust/Waist/Hip: 87" / 55" / 91" (*Cues: Goenitz Theme - The King of Fighters 2002 Unlimited Match*) Wiz: Her Flying Squirrel Furiante and Deadly Ninja Bee attacks help her control the field of battle, and she uses clever fake-outs to trip up her foes. “So she uses speed and tricks to take out stronger opponents,” analyzed Twilight. “Sounds like a fighting style i can get behind,” commented a grinning Rainbow Dash. “Sure ya just don’t to impress sonic?” said cheeky Applejack. Getting a frustrated yell from her rainbow friend. Attacks Flying Squirrel Furiante Deadly Ninja Bees Folding Fan Fandango Windmill Waster Hacho San [Fan Throw] Bushin [Shadow Images] Boomstick: And she has an unlimited amount of Steel Fans she can throw, which I guess she keeps in her non-existing bra. “How does she do that?” Twilight asked, trying to understand what magic Mai was using. “Boomstick,” Rarity growled, getting even angrier than before. Seeing his crush like this, Spike scooted away from her slowly. Wiz: That's right… “What?” everyone asked stunned. Boomstick: Really? I was just making a joke about her giant boobs. The temptation to down her wine bottle was getting stronger. Wiz: Speaking of her... outfits... Boomstick: Or lack thereof... “Shut. it!” Rarity gritted out. “She looks like she’s going to explode at any moment,” Spike whispered to the rest of the group. Wiz: While it's unrestricted, it isn't exactly form-fitting either. However, as a testament to her training and balance, it doesn't seem to bother her. “Doesn't bother me either…” Spike muttered under his breath. (*Cues: Esaka (Japan Team Theme) - King of Fighters '96*) Wiz: She wears it for Kunoichi, a female ninja method of sexually distracting a foe before striking. Boomstick: ...I'm sorry, what? I was distracted. Spike was thankful that his friends were watching the show, so they don’t see his blush. Wiz: Never mind. Butterfly Fans Steel Unlimited Supply Used in Close-Quarters & as a Ranged Projectile Flammable Boomstick: Okay, Mai can create fire and explosions, and she can control whatever fire she's created. “That could be useful,” Rarity said, happy to hear something that can’t be sexualized by Boomstick. “It does seem better than Chun Li’s chi attacks,” Twilight said, after seeing Mai’s skills with her fire power. Pyrokinesis Creates Fire & Explosions Ryu En Bu Attack Burning Mai Attack Channels Fire Through Clothes & Objects Wiz: Mai consistently enters the King of Fighters tournaments to support herself, her Self proclaimed fiancé, Andy Bogard. However, she has yet to win any major tournament, nor has she ever made a great impact in taking down the bosses. Feats Mastered Stealth & Ninjitsu Does Well in Tournaments Formed the Women's Team Never Won a Tourney Has Only Made Minor Impacts in Plots “So she’s a lower tier fighter then her friends.” Twilight theorized. “I’m sure she helps out as much as she can,” said Fluttershy. Boomstick: Or taking down Andy! “Stop talking like that!” Screamed Rarity. “Wow Rarity almost sounds like your little bit jealo-” Applejack teased before her words died in her throat when Rarity gave her the most bloodthirsty stare ever. “If you even think of finishing that sentence Applejack I will go down to you house and replace everything with goudy city theme objects and have Pinkie Pie paint your farmhouse!” threaten Rarity to a frighten Applejack. “Ooh! I even have some glitter paint to!” cheered the Pink Pony. causing Applejack to pale even further. Wiz: She always does well, though, even joining Andy's award winning team in 1999. Boomstick: Even so, she ends up having to be rescued a lot, usually by Andy. But for some reason, I don't seem to mind. Mai Shiranui: Mai Shiranui of the Shiranui School must teach you a lesson. Wiz: Alright, the combatants are set, let's end this debate once and for all. Boomstick: It’s time for a death battle! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ On teams chun li's team: Twilight, Rarity, and Applejack On mai’s team. Everyone else. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Death Battle (*Cues: Flame Dragon God 'Theme of Mai Shiranui' (Arranged) - Fatal Fury Special*) Mai Shiranui awaits her opponent in the middle of a deep forest. Chun-Li walks up and Mai gives her a respectful bow. “At least Mai is respecting her opponent.” Fluttershy said. FIGHT! Chun-Li starts off with a Kikoken, but due to the slow movement and limited range of the projectile, Mai easily rolls under it and starts delivering a fast barrage of low strikes and the Folding Fan Fandango, ending with a drop kick to knock back Chun-Li. She pauses for a moment before charging in to finish off her opponent. “Mais already starting of strong,” Twilight said as they all watched the battle continued. (*Cues: Chun Li's Theme - Marvel vs Capcom 3*) However, Chun-Li recovers and springs to her feet, kicking Mai in the face. She then flips over Mai's attempted Ryu En Bu Attack, and throws her back. Just as Mai gets back up, Chun-Li charges in with her Axe Kick, followed by several hard blows, and her Lightning Leg Attack. “And here comes Chun-li showing off those legs!” Applejack cheered Realizing that close-combat with Chun-Li is not favorable, Mai gets some distance and throws out three of her Hacho San (Butterfly Fans) with the third being powered by her pyrokinesis. She also leaps in. Chun-Lin blocks first two fans but is unable to block the third fiery one and Mai's simultaneous fire strike from above, taking both hits and an extra strike. Mai then attempts a fake-out with her Flying Squirrel Furiante, but Chun-Li anticipates the move and lets loose with a powered-up version of her Lightning Legs, causing Mai to take heavy damage and knocking her down. Chun-Li charges in but Mai manages to recover, flips over Chun-Li and trips her with a sweep kick. “This is getting so intense!!” yelled Spike as everyone else was sweating from the fight. Mai changes her strategy and begins leading Chun-Li in a chase up the tall trees. Each time they pass each other they exhange blows, but Mai manages to get another pyrokinetic strike, knocking Chun-Li down. Chun-Li retaliates and catches Mai off-guard with her Spinning Bird Kick. Mai is left dazed on a large tree limb, as Chun-Li lands and pauses to build up her ki to finish off her opponent. This is Chun-Li's final mistake as it is just enough time for Mai to recover and roll out of the way. Chun-Li's Kikosho Attack misses, and Mai uses her legs to grab Chun-Li's head, slam her into the tree limb, and then kick her into another tree. As Chun-Li falls, Mai follows her down in a fiery rolling attack, slamming into her opponent as she hits the forest floor. With Chun-Li standing in a fiery daze, Mai uses her pyrokinetic powers to engulf Chun-Li in a huge explosion of fire, leaving nothing but a charred skeleton, similar to Mortal Kombat's Scorpion's Fatality. Everyone look wide eyed at the brutal death. K.O.! Mai: Nippon Ichi! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Results Boomstick: Boobs win! “Sigh… just, just buck it.” sighed a defeated Rarity, too tired to get angry anymore. Wiz: Chun-Li maybe a bit tougher and quicker than Mai, and her professional training even prepared her for the fake out ruse. However, her arsenal pales in comparison to that of Mai's, with her pyrokinesis and steel fans, Mai had superior range and energy-based attacks. “She had the clear advantage from the beginning.” stated Twilight. Boomstick: And while Chun's a beast in close corners combat, her straightforward approach was a bad match up against Mai's ninja training. “Even I have to admit even I would have to play dirty against a pony with mai’s skill.” said Applejack. Wiz: It was certainly a close match, but Mai's nimbleness and firepower eventually won out. Boomstick: Chun-Li's never looked hotter. “Even i found that in poor taste,” muttered Pinkie Pie. Wiz: The Winner is Mai Shiranui. END! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Boomstick: Next time on Death Battle. They see an open field. They see a flying jet like vehicle fly overhead, they unexpectedly watch the vehicle "transform" as it shapeshifts into a more humanoid form. They also see a blur zoom past it and lands into the ground the creates a dust cloud. They were unable to see who the figure is as the video ends. STARSCREAM VS. RAINBOW DASH!!! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ The room was oddly silent after they saw the preview for the next battle. It took them a moment for their tiny little brains to process that the blue speedster of their group was gonna be on Death Battle. “AWWWWW YEEEAAAHHH! THIS IS GONNA BE AWESOME,” Rainbow yelled feeling very excited at the news. “But, how?” Rarity asked confused by this. “Rainbow’s gonna fight?” Fluttershy asked, hiding behind her hair. “A giant robot?” Applejack asked, not faring any better than her friends. “Yeah, it’s gonna be awesome,” Rainbow said, floating in front of her friends. “What’re you doing on the show!?” Her friends yelled. Rainbow covers her ears and said, “Can you not yell so loud? I’m right here.” “Darling, aren’t you even the least bit curious of why you’re on the show?” Rarity asked, worried for her friend. “Nope,” Rainbow said, not caring one bit. After she said that, her friends began yelling at her for her careless attitude This lasted for a couple of minutes as Applejack saw Spike and Twilight just sitting on the couch calmly. “Why’re you two just sitting there? Aren’t you the least bit curious why Rainbow is the show?” “Not really. This is obviously a part of the multiverse theory,” Twilight said, as if it was the simplest thing in the world. Everyone looked at Twilight and said, “Multiverse theory?” “Yeah. Multiverse theory means that there’s an infinite number of worlds where they’re different in some way or form. It’s like the world I go to and see Sunset or the world were Celestia and Luna were evil,” Twilight said, calming her friends down somewhat. “Well I don’t care about this theory. I refuse to see a friend of mine fight to the death,” Rarity said, walking towards the door. “I hear ya Rare. You can watch the episode if you want, I just don’t feel comfortable watching it,” Applejack said, following Rarity as Fluttershy nodded ad followed Applejack out the door. The four that stayed behind just stared at their retreating friends. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ CHAPTER END! NEXT TIME RAINBOW DASH VS STARSCREAM!!!
Master Chief VS Doomguy.It’s a new day as Rainbow and her friends made their way to Twilight’s castle. Opening the door, they started to walk towards the viewing room as it was dubbed. “Hey Dash, you know what’s we’re in for?” Applejack asked, looking at the floating pegasus curiously. “What do you mean?” Rainbow asked, not looking at them but flying ahead of them. “She means did you see who we’ll be seeing this time,” Rarity said, giving Rainbow a dry look. It was a simple question considering what they’re gonna be doing in a few minutes. “Oh, that. All I can saw is that they have armor and weapons. Kinda hard to explain,” Rainbow said, furrowing her brow. Once they reached the viewing room, they saw Twilight and Spike talking to a familiar stallion. The stallion had a white coat and a blue mane that had a light and dark blue streak in it. His cutie mark was a dark blue sheild with a pink star on his flank. He looked up and waved at the girls who just arrived. “Hi girls,” the stallion said, putting his hoof down. “Your highness/Prince Shining Armor,” the girls said at once. The stallion, Shining Armor, chuckled and said, “Please just call me Shining. We’re all friends here.” He really didn’t want to be treated like a noble at the moment. “Be that as it may, may I be bold to ask why you’re here?” Rarity asked, taking a seat on the couch. “To tell the truth, Twilight sent me a letter a few days ago and here I am,” Shining said, pulling Twilight in for a hug while she hugged him back. The girls were quiet as the memory of the teenage mutant ninja turtles fight was still fresh in their mind. The fact that Twilight was hugging her brother tightly was proof that she still thought of the fight as well. Twilight then separated from her brother and said, “By the way, do you know where Starlight is?” Shining was confused for a moment then said, “Starlight left a day before I got your letter. She didn’t come back yet?” “That’s weird. Where could she be?” Twilight said as her friends were wondering the same thing. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ where in the world is Starlight Glimmer?~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ We find Starlight walking through a dangerous path on the side of a mountain. She tried not to look down as a rickety looking bridge came into view. “Finally! Now i just need to cross the bridge and then it’s a straight line back home!” cheered Starlight as she made her way towards the bridge, but she was stop by a figure jumping in front of her path. “Halt!” screamed the figure. Who was actually an old looking goat with a brown coat, a long shaggy beard, and his right eye. “Stop! Who would cross the Bridge of Death must answer me these questions three, ere the other side he see.” the old goat said as he gave Starlight Crazed look. “And what happens if i get any of them wrong?” questioned Starlight, nervous at the odd Goat. “Then you are cast into the Gorge of Eternal Peril!” yelled the crazed Goat with a mad grin, and to prove his claim a random boulder flew up into the air and landing in the gorge. Starlight hesitated for a mere sec before she gave the mad goat a stern glare. “Very well you old goat! Ask me your questions and I’ll answer them without fail!” she declared. Mutch to the old goat’s delight. “First! What... is your name?” asked the old goat. “Starlight Glimmer,” She said, confused by the easy question. “What... is your quest?” the old goat asked dramatically. “To find my find my way home and be with my friends,” Starlight answered without hesitation, causing the old goat to grin. “What... is the airspeed velocity of an unladen swallow?” the old goat said with an unnerving grin that only grew wider as Starlight looked down with an unsure look on her face. “I don’t know what you mean,” Starlight said, confusing the old goat. “Do you mean An African or European swallow?” she asked. “Huh? I-- I don't know that. YAAAAAAA HOO HOOHOO HOO EE!!!” screamed the goat as he was thrown off the ledge by his own magic, and as Starlight looked down to only see the deep darkness of the casm she could only let out a sigh of relief. “Thank goodness hanging out with fluttershy always has some random animal facts of the day,” said the mare as she made her was across the bridge. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ “She’s probably fine. Now let’s start the episode,” Pinkie said as Twilight pressed play on the remote. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Interlude (*Cues: Invader - Jim Johnston*) Wiz: When the aliens invade a thousand years from now and our hyper-advanced technology isn't enough, our last hope will inevitably be placed in the hands of the lone space marines. “Sounds like use during the monster of the week,” Rainbow Dash joked. Getting some laughs from the group except Shining Armor who was looking at the floor with a frown. “I wish you girls wouldn't even need to deal with those kind of dangers,” he whispered to himself. Boomstick: Like the super soldier, Master Chief ... That caught Shining Armor’s attention as he was interested on mad this guy a “super” soldier. Wiz: ...And Doomguy , the Bane of Hell itself. “He seems scary,” Fluttershy muttered, holding a pillow in front of her like a shield. Boomstick: He's Wiz and I'm Boomstick. Wiz: And it's our job to analyze their weapons, armor, and skills to find out who would win a Death Battle. Master Chief (*Cues: Halo - Brothers In Arms*) Wiz: At the young age of six, John-117 was abducted by the UNSC to be part of the Spartan-ll program. “They abducted children?” Fluttershy yelled, feeling angry that someone out there would do that to a small child. Boomstick: The worst daycare ever. “More like a living Tartarus for those poor kids,” Applejack said with a glare. Wiz: At fourteen, he underwent the program's augmentation procedures, dramatically increasing his strength, speed, vision, intelligence, and reflexes. Boomstick: When he was done, his bones were nearly indestructible and he could beat up and kill way more experienced marines. At fourteen! Man, that's one harsh puberty. “Wow,” Shining said, shocked that an experienced soldier could be beaten by a child how was experimented on. “Wish I could have done that when I was younger.” “Abducted?” Twilight asked confused by her brother’s words. “No, I mean beat up experienced soldiers. Would have made boot camp easier I think,” Shining said, chuckling a bit. Spartan-ll Augmentations 15x Stronger Skeleton Muscle Increase 300% Increased Reflexes Better eyesight & Perception Boosted Tissue Growth Lactase Recovery Decrease Heightened Memory, Intelligence, & Creativity (*Cues: Halo 3 - Last of the Brave*) Wiz: Upon reaching the rank Master Chief Petty Officer, John began a thirty year campaign leading the Spartans against three different threats: The Insurrection, The alien Covenant, and the Flood. As a Spartan, he wears Mark VI Mjolnir armour. This technological marvel links directly to John's brain, so his actions controlled on thought BEFORE movement. Simultaneously, the suit itself multiplies Chief's already enhanced physical capabilities. “Fascinating!” Twilight said as she she pulled out a quill and paper and started so write down the info on screen in a rapid pace. Boomstick: The suit weighs half-a-freakin' ton, yet the guy still jumps around like he's on the moon. “I don’t think even I could move in that,” Applejack said, eyes wide at the weight of the suit. “I think not even Maud could move as fast as she usually does in that,” Pinkie Pie said knowing while her sister could still move in a set of that armor, she would be slowed down considerably. Wiz: The helmet's Heads Up Display includes a motion tracker with an eighty foot radius. Also, the suit projects a recharging energy shield. “Wish we had that in the Royal Guards. Could have made a few missions easier,” Shining said, imagining himself in the armor. Mark VI Mjolnir Armour Brain linked reactive circuits Force Multiplying Circuits Titanium Alloy Plating Heat Resistant Motion Tracker 5 second regenerating energy shields Weight: 1000 lbs Boomstick: The Chief's first sidearm is the M60 Magnum. (*Cues: Leonidas - Halo 2*) Boomstick: This scoped, high powered pistol uses 12.7 millimeter armour piercing rounds with the precision accuracy of over 400 feet. I don't care what kinda armour you're wearin', three headshots from this baby, and you're done. “Jeez that could do some damage to Dragon Scales,” said Spike as he shuddered at the thought of getting shot by the Chief’s handgun. Weaponry Side Arms M6D Magnum Ammo: 12.7 mm Range: 400 ft Scope: 2x Wiz: His other sidearms include the SMG and frag grenades. M7 Submachine Gun Ammo: 5 mm Range: 155 ft M9 Frag Grenade Kill Radius: 16ft “Those grenades could have helped during the changeling invasion,” Shining said, thinking of how much easier it would have been. Boomstick: His standard firearms include the rapid fire Assault Rifle, the more precise Battle Rifle, and the M90 shotgun, a pump action deathdealer that uses Soellkraft 8 gauge shells... Wiz: ....Which are so impossibly dangerous, they are banned world wide to the point of near extinction. “Oh my~ and he has something that dangerous,” Rarity asked. Standard Firearms MA5C Assault Rifle Ammo: 7.62 mm Rate of Fire: 650 RPM BR55HB SR Battle Rifle Ammo: 9.5 mm Range: 3100 ft M90 Shotgun Type: Pump Spread: 15 Pellets Ammo: Soellkraft 8-Gauge Shells Boomstick: But even that's not enough killin' power for the Master Chief. The M41 rocket launcher holds 2 rockets at once and his sniper rile was designed for killin' giant alien infantry from long distances. The shells can pierce tank armour or rip people in half. And then there's Chief's killer app: The Spartan Laser. “That's such a cool name,” gushed Rainbow Dash. “But man he’s carrying enough firepower to take out a group of dragon” muttered Spike in fear of ever being on the chiefs bad side. Wiz: With a three second charge and a 5 shot limit, it does have it's faults. Buuuuut.... Boomstick: Think of it kinda like a laser pointer... that points things INTO OBLIVION! The group laughed at Boomsticks joke. (The Spartan Laser obliterates a hulking alien soldiers and a giant turret.) “Woah,” Shining, Spike, Rainbow and Twilight said quietly. “If the guards had that, we wouldn’t have to worry about any dangerous beasts attacking us,” Rarity said, amazed by the weapon’s firepower. “That’s better than my cannon,” Pinkie said, watching the destruction in awe. Heavy Weaponry M41 Rocket Launcher Ammo: 102 HEAT Charge Rockets Scope: 2x SRS990-S2 AM Sniper Rifle Ammo: 14.5 mm Fin-Stabilized Range: 7545.9 ft Night-Vision Mode M6 Spartan Laser Shot Limit: 5 John-117's Most Powerful Weapon Wiz: Master Chief can only carry two or three weapons at a time. However, he seems to posses extraordinary luck and can usually find exactly the weapon he needs somewhere nearby. Boomstick: He finds weapons on the ground more often than you can find change on a sidewalk. “He’s got some incredible luck,” Rainbow said Wiz: He can also use special equipment in the field. The overshield triples the strength of his armour's shields, and active camouflage will cover him in an aura of light bending energy, creating the illusion of invisibility. “Now that’s something my men could use,” Shining said as he imagined his soldier’s with that kind of gear. Boomstick: Plus the bubble shield is a portable force field that projects the Chief from all projectiles, though people and vehicles can pass right through. How the hell does that work? “Almost sounds like your shield Shiny,” Twilight said getting a nod from her brother. “Ya, but unlike that one mine prevents anything from getting in,” stated Shining Armor. Special Equipment Overshield Active Camouflage Radar Jammer Regenerator Deployable Cover Power Drain Bubble Shield Wiz: But even THAT'S not the last of Master Chief's vast arsenal. When the elites allied themselves with the UNSC during the Human/Covenant War, the two sides traded some of their weaponry, giving John access to plasma pistols, plasma rifles, and the Type-51 carbines. “He even has alien weapons?” Shining asked, feeling a little jealous that the Chief can use other worldly weapons. Sangheili Weaponry Type-25 Plasma Pistol Type-25 Plasma Rifle Type-51 Carbine Boomstick: Not to mention my favourites, the sticky plasma grenade and the lethal energy sword. “Oooh! I wasnt some of those grenades for work!” said an excited Pinkie Pie. “Why would you need those to bake sugarcube?” asked a confused Applejack. “Not for my first job silly but for my new job in the future!” she explained, getting even more confused looks from her friends before they all decided to not questioned it. Type-1 Plasma Grenade Kill Radius: 13 ft Sticks to Targets Wiz: The Type-1 Energy sword is one of the few weapons John has yet to master. It features two, four foot energy blades that can actually block bullets. “The pegasus would use a sword like that easily,” Rainbow said, liking another sword like a lightsaber. “Even unicorns can use them, darling,” Rarity said, knowing anypony could possibly use the sword. Type-1 Energy Sword Length: 4.15 ft Weight: 5.2 lbs Boomstick: Really? Man, that would've been useful in the games. Wiz: The Master Chief has consistently proven to accomplish the impossible. He's an expert in combat strategy, can run 50 miles an hour, has defeated three entirely different armies multiple times, destroyed an entire covenant armada single handedly, and prevented galactic genocide.... TWICE. “He defeated three armies?” Fluttershy asked, feeling small compared to the green armored man. “Destroyed an armada single handedly? He’s a one man army,” Shining said, having a newfound respect for the Chief. Boomstick: And one time he fell from orbit, holding on to nothing but a flimsy piece of metal, landing without a scratch, and was up kickin' alien ass just a few minutes later. Why? Because he can. “So cool~!” Rainbow dash gushed as she found another person to look up to. Background Height: 7'0" [w/ armor] Weight: 1,287 lbs [w/ armor] UNSC Marines SPARTAN-II Defeated 3 Armies Destroyed Halo 04 & The Ark Super Soldier Top Speed: 50+ mph Hood: Master Chief, you mind telling me what you're doing on that ship? Master Chief: Sir, finishing this fight. “Oh my,” Rarity said, feeling a blush form on her face at the rough yet powerful voice. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ The group felt that the Master Chief deserved his title. Even Rainbow Dash said how cool he was while Shining felt the Chief was a true soldier. He wished someday he could protect his family and kingdom like the Chief did for his world. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Doomguy (*Cues: Doom - Main Theme*) Boomstick: The original, ass-kicking, demon-slaying, first person badass, and one of my personal heroes: Doomguy! “Oh dear…” Rarity said worryingly, scared at the thought of someone that Boomstick looks up to. Background Height: 6'2" Weight: 230 lbs. U.S. Space Marine Captain Prefers a Run-&-Gun Strategy Defeated Hell 5 times Top Speed: 57 mph Wiz: After disobeying his commanding officer, and beating him to death, Doomguy's career took a drastic turn when he was sent to the desolate moons of Mars, which so happened to house a magical gateway to the bloody bowels of Hell. “What kind of soldier would kill his commanding officer?” Shining yelled, ready to rant when the box glowed and a crumpled piece of paper was thrown out. Twilight grabbed the paper with her magic and uncrumpled it. Taking a moment to read what’s on the paper, she turned to her brother and said, “It says here that the commanding officer told Doomguy to kill innocent civilians.” That caused Shining to calm down a little bit but was still a little angry at Doomguy, just a tiny bit. Fluttershy was slowly losing her fear for Doomguy when she heard that. Boomstick: Mexico! “I don’t know what that place is but it sounds like it has some really good food,” Pinkie said. Wiz: (slow to respond) No. Boomstick: And when Hell tried to kill everybody, Doomguy killed them back. “How can you kill something that was already dead?” asked Twilight. “Who cares, it’s awesome,” Rainbow said, feeling pumped. Wiz: He wears the Mega armor, a shielding combat suit almost twice as strong as typical security armor and can endure dozens of normally fatal plasma blasts. “Simple but effective.” Shining said. Mega Armor 2x's stronger than regular armor Non-Regenerating Energy Shields Max Armor & Shield Charge is 200% Boomstick: He carries a huge arsenal of murder machines, all at once! “An advantage over the Chief,” Twilight said, knowing the Chief can only carry 2 weapons at a time. Wiz: Using a backpack with experimental warp technology, Doomguy is able to hold all his weapons simultaneously. “Sounds like Pinkie’s Hair,” deadpanned Rarity as she saw said mare Pull out a cupcake and eat it. Boomstick: I'm pretty sure his pistol uses the same technology, since he never has to reload! “It would be useful if i could get some crossbows that didn't need to reload,” pondered Shining Armor. Boomstick: And when things get tight, his chainsaw will rip and tear through anybody! Rgggghhhh! Not the chainsaw! Yes the chainsaw! Rgggghhh! (pause) And his chain gun mows down everything in seconds. While normally they would be disturbed at Boomstick’s murder fantasies, the group couldn't help at his over dramatic acting. (*Cues: The Demons from Adrian's Pen (Orchestral) - Doom*) Wiz: Oddly, the chaingun uses the same .5 mm ammo as the handgun, and is relatively ineffective against strong body armor. “Sounds like it won’t do much damage to the chief's armor,” commented Spike, getting a few nods in Agreement. Sidearms Pistol (Ammo Capacity: 200 Bullets) Chainsaw (A.K.A.: Great Communicator; gas powered) Chain Gun (Ammo: 5mm, rate of fire: 525 rpm, Full-Auto Dispenses Accuracy) Boomstick: Well, that's stupid. Luckily, Doomguy has his trusty pump-action shotgun! It holds sixteen shells and fires seven pellets a shot, with a spread range so ridiculous he doesn't even have to aim! But apparently one overpowered shottie isn't enough! So Doomguy got himself a super shotgun: a heavy double-barreled devastator that fires a huge spread of twenty pellets. Good luck dodging that! “Huh for some reason everytime i hear the word shotgun i get the urge to punch some lazy fella who’s also orange.” said a confused Applejack. Wiz: He also wields a plasma gun and a rapid fire rocket launcher that can hold fifty rockets at once. “Who designs these things and where can I find him?” Shining and Twilight said at the same time. Shining wanted to get the guards outfitted with these things while Twilight wanted to know the inner workings of these weapons. Standard Firearms Shotgun (Pump Action; Spread: 7 Pellets) Super Shotgun (Sawn off and break open, spread: 20 Pellets) Plasma Gun Rocket Launcher (Ammo Capacity: 50 Rockets, Rocket Speed: 40 mph) Boomstick: What the hell! Who designs these things? Wiz: But even that pales in comparison to Doomguy's ultimate weapon. This caught the group's attention especially Twilight and her brother. Boomstick: It's the king of cannons, the doomsday bazooka that lays waste to everything: It's the Big Fucking Gun 9000! (Doomguy launches a giant green ball that explodes when it hits, Killing everything on screen.) Everyone was awed by the destruction on the screen. Wiz: The BFG fires enormous rounds of plasma. Upon impact the resulting detonation releases trace-rays across a wide varying blast radius. This ¨gun¨ is strong enough to annihilate the gargantuan Cyber-Demon in a mere two or three shots, and the unprecedented range of its splash damage ensures no-one is getting away unscathed. BFG 9000 Plasma Blasts Slow-Moving Projectile Huge Blast Radius Can be charged Obliterates everything Boomstick/Twilight/Shining: (moans with pleasure) Wiz: Wait a second Boomstick, you're not going to believe this but the BFG is not Doomguy´s deadliest weapon. “What, more?” Rarity said, unconvinced that Doomguy needs anymore weapons after that last display. Boomstick: Yes! More! “Ya give us more!” the two sibling said. “Those two are acting like foals in a candy store,” Applejack muttered to the others as they snickered to themselves. Wiz: Behold the Unmaker, a portable death ray that puts everything else to shame. Boomstick/the siblings: Gimme! Gimme gimme gimme! Wiz: There's just one catch. The Unmaker's beams are so powerful because they actually feed off the demonic energy of the target, so it's ineffective against anyone who isn't from Hell. “Still worth it for Tartarus,” Shining said bouncing in his seat as Twilight did the same thing. Unmaker Laser Beams Up to 3 simultaneous lasers Paralyzes demons Demon-Tech in origin Feeds on Demonic Auras Deadly only to the Demons of Hell Boomstick: Dammit! Well, I guess it doesn't really matter when you already have a backpack full of things to kill people with. Give me the BFG any day. “Agreed,” said Rainbow Dash. (*Cues: The Imp’s Song - Doom*) Wiz: Now Doomguy isn't exactly a super soldier, but his strength and speed are far greater than a normal man, due to the use of power ups. Boomstick: The Berserker power up completely heals him and increases his strength ten full. And the Invincibility and Partial Invisibility power ups do, well, exactly what you think they would. Power-Ups Berserk Megasphere Radiation Shield Light Amplification Visor Partial Invisibility Invulnerability Wiz: Doomguy rarely relies on strategy, always preferring to mow down his enemies as fast as he can. The two sibling had to frown at, feeling that Doomguy needed to put more thought into his actions. Boomstick: It's more fun that way. Wiz: He's defeated the armies of Hell five separate times. He even walked right knee-deep into Hell itself to avenge his pet rabbit Daisy. “He fought through hell for his bunny?” Fluttershy said, seeing Doomguy in a new light. She felt she would do the same thing if anything happened to Angel Bunny. He can run up to fifty-seven miles an hour, even outrunning his own rockets, and can spot invisible enemies. “This guy’s a killing machine,” gasped out Applejack. Boomstick: He's no normal man. He's Doomguy! The group watches Doomguy punch some kind of cybernetic, demonic brain monster until it collapses and explodes. Wiz: Alright, the combatants are set, let's end this debate once and for all. But first, a message for our sponsors, Squarespace. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ As the trailer played out, everyone was quick to form their team. On team Chief: Twilight, Shining armor, Rarity, and Applejack. And on team Doomguy: Rainbow Dash, Spike, Pinkie Pie, and Fluttershy. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Boomstick: It's time for a Death Battle! Death Battle (*Cues: Blow Me Away - Breaking Benjamin*) Doomguy is seen walking around the stage that has a warthog and a few crates while Doomguy is carrying a shotgun. Suddenly, Master Chief walks into the area with a loaded pistol. “The atmosphere is so intense,” Rarity commented. Sweating from the intense staredown. “Things are about to get load!” Spike cheered. FIGHT! (*Cues: Intermission from Doom - Doom*) Master Chief pulls out an assault rifle and begins unloading on Doomguy, but it is doing no damage. A firefight erupts and Doomguy is rapidly switching through his weapons, shooting each time. Chief takes cover, but it is no use, as Doomguy pulls out his rocket launcher and rapidly shoots rockets at him. “Master chief better get out of their!” Applejack yelled. (*Cues: Halo - Rock Anthem For Saving The World*) Chief over-dramatically dodges them all with somersaults and barrel rolls and grabs one of the soaring rockets. He chucks it back towards Doomguy, stunning him. While stunned, Chief grabs the Warthog and chucks it at Doomguy, revealing an Energy Sword and an invisibility power up. While Doomguy is trying to shoot the Warthog out of the air, Chief switches the assault rifle for the sword and goes invisible. Doomguy finally gets the Warthog downed, but he notices Chief is nowhere to be found. “Did you see that!? He threw that thing at Doomguy!” Rainbow yelled in disbelief. “And his luck really kicked in with the whole finding a weapon and power up,” Twilight added in. (*Cues: Doom - Sign of Evil*) He then pulls out his chaingun, jerks around, and begins to fire, revealing Chief, who is using the sword as a shield to dodge them. Doomguy, seeing how the Chaingun is doing nothing, pulls out the shotgun and blast Chief back into a crate, revealing an invincibility power up. Doomguy gets the power up while Chief uses a rocket launcher and sniper rifle to stop him, but no dice. The invincibly wears off and Doomguy fires his BFG, but out of the explosion is a plasma grenade. It sticks onto Doomguy's shoulder and blows him into bloody chunks. “No!” cried Fluttershy as she saw Doomguy become a gory mess. “There there Fluttershy, it’ll be ok,” Pinkie said soothingly. (*Cues: This is the Hour - Halo 3*) The smoke from the BFG round fades away and reveals an unscathed Master Chief, who used a bubble shield to stop the BFG round. Chief walks over to Doomguy's bloody chunks and teabags them. The group gave a deadpanned look as the chief did the universal gaming sign of fuck you. K.O.! Results Boomstick: It's about time we had a good old-fashioned gunfight! “It was quite flashy i have to agree,” Rarity said. “And loud,” whispered Fluttershy. Still sad about Doomguy’s death. Wizard: Doomguy may have an enormously destructive arsenal, but, unfortunately, his weapons lack versatility. “Sometimes power isn’t enough.” lectured Shining armor. Boomstick: I hate to admit it, but Chief can take and dish out more punishment than Doomguy. “Doomguy is still just a man with a lot of weapons while master Chief was modified to be a super soldier,” Spike Stated. Getting a proud smile from Twilight because of his analyzing skill. Wizard: And while defeating Hell sounds awe-inspiring, Doomguy's enemies weren't that much different from Master Chief's. “Ya they both fought things that were bigger and meaner than a human,” agreed Rainbow Dash. Boomstick: This fight was nuts! (laughs) “HA!” Pinkie Pie laughed as everyone groaned in frustration. Wizard: The winner is the Master Chief. END! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Boomstick: Next time on Death Battle Two mad scientist looking old men appear on screen before the screen goes black. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Turning off the TV, Twilight turns towards her friends as her brother slid off the couch and onto his hooves. “Gotta say, that was fun but I need to go,” Shining said, looking at Twilight. Before she could say anything, a bright light came from the box as Shining looked at it curiously. “Is that the box you told me about?” “Yup, the box gives us some stuff after each episode,” Twilight said, walking over towards the box and opened it. Looking inside, Twilight saw a bunch of toys, shirts and a few sweatbands. There was even a plush toy that had a tag on it. “So what did we get?” Rainbow asked, wanting to see what cool stuff they get this time. “Some toys, shirts and sweatbands. There’s even something in here with Fluttershy’s name on it,” Twilight said, looking confused. “So, what? Like a blanket or something?” Rainbow said, feeling a bit curious. “No, I mean it literally has her name on it. A tag I mean,” Twilight said, levitating a plush toy of Doomguy towards Fluttershy. Fluttershy looked at the plush curiously before taking it into her hooves. She quietly said, “Yay,” as she gives the plush a hug which then plays the Doomguy’s theme song. The others split the stuff as Shining and Spike get a few figures and a Doom shirt in their sizes. Rainbow gets a Master Cheif shirt made for pegasus and some sweatbands that say “Rip and Tear” on them. Applejack got a mini replica of Doomguy’s Shotgun and Rarity had a statue of Master Chief in an epic pose. Everypony else got toys and shirts in their sizes. “Well I need to go. Have to get back and see Cadance and Flurry Heart,” Shining said while giving Twilight a hug. He walks towards the door giving the girls a wave goodbye. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ As Shining Armor sat down in his seat in the royal crystal train, he couldn't help but think about the show he had just watched with his baby sister and her friends. ‘To think there are such powerful soldiers out there fighting in grand battles that makes the changeling invasion look like a schoolyard fight between kids,’ thought Shining Armor feeling like he was completely outmatched by some real soldiers. 'But' he thought, pulling out his journal and a quill, HE started to draw out some designs for new sets of armor that were based off the Chief’s. 'Doesn't mean I can’t learn from this,’ he thought as he continued working on his designs. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ CHAPTER END! NEXT TIME, EGGMAN VS DR. WILEY.
Eggman VS Wily.As the girls put away their new gifts from the magic box they all gathered around the tv for the finale episode for the day. Interlude (*Cues: Invader - Jim Johnston*) Boomstick: It's no secret that scientists are, well, crazy as hell. But these two take it way too far! “So it’s a battle of the eggheads?” Rainbow Dash teasingly asked getting a pout from Twilight. Wiz: Dr. Ivo Robotnik, aka the Eggman... “That’s ...a strange name,” Twilight said, confused. “Wait isn’t that the guy who wants to beat sonic?” Applejack asked.. “What!?” yelled Rainbow dash before glaring at the screen. Boomstick: ...and Dr. Albert Wily, aka Einstein without rogaine. “Another strange title,” Fluttershy said, clutching her Doomguy plushie. “We’ll need wait and see how this goes, darling,” Rarity said, giggling at her friend’s little position. Wiz: In this scenario, both Doctors will be leading their mechanized armies to see who is the deadliest robot commander. “(Gasp!) ROBOT WARS!!!” screamed an excited Pinkie Pie. Boomstick: He's Wiz and I'm Boomstick. Wiz: And it's our job to analyze their weapons, armor and skills to find out who would win a Death Battle. Dr. Eggman (*Cues: Dr Eggman's Theme - Sonic SatAM*) Wiz: Dr. Eggman is the obese, yet strangely athletic, evil mastermind responsible for terrorizing the world of Sonic the Hedgehog, in his quest to rule a global empire. His engineering mastery has led to a massive army of unique robot warriors using the strangest fuel source, kidnapped animals. “WHAT!?” screamed mostly everyone in the group before they turned a worried flance towards Fluttershy, whose mane was covering her face as she held her Doomguy Plushie with a tighter grip. “That…” whispered Fluttershy. “Uh… you okay there sugarcube,” asked a worried Applejack. “That… that…” whispered Fluttershy a little bit louder. “Ummm. Fluttershy?” Pinkie asked getting a little bit scared now. “That… THAT NO GOOD SON OF A-!!!” screamed an enraged Fluttershy as she went on a tirade of cursing that left the rest of the group stunned speechless, even the two chaos gods that were watching them were surprised by the outburst from the gentle mare. Boomstick: He's PETA's worst nightmare! Background Real Name: Ivo Robotnik Height: 6'1" Weight: 282 lbs. I.Q.: Over 300 Phd: Unknown & Probably Fake Ruler of the Eggman Empire Endorses Animal Cruelty Wiz: His army is based around speed and defense, including Moto Bugs, Caterkillers, Buzz Bombers, Egg Pawns and SWATbots. Robot Infantry Motobug High Speed Scouts Caterkiller Covered in defensive fights Buzz Bomber Quick Flyers with Laser Guns E-1001 Egg Pawn Impressive arsenal, but dumb SWATbot Well-Rounded, but fragile Rarity had to suppress a shudder at the insect based machines. “(giggle) they look funny!” laughed Pinkie Pie. Boomstick: But Eggman's got way more than that! His Egg Fleet is a huge armada of Battleships, led by the Massive Egg Carrier, which supports a huge front mounted laser cannon. Everyone was amazed at the ships. “With those ships, he could beat Ember’s army easily,” Spike said, eyes wide in amazement and fear. Egg Fleet Composed of Hundreds of Flying Warships Mako Shark Gunship Sawfish Battleship Manta Ray Ship Egg Carrier Length: 2588 ft. Numerous Missile Launchers Front-Mounted Laser Cannon (*Cues: Sonic 3 and Kunckles - Robonik Orchestral remix*) Wiz: The Eggman army is spearheaded by his deadliest robot warriors, the Badniks. The EggRobo is a smartbot crafted in Eggman's own image and designed to carry out tasks Eggman himself would normally do. Badniks EggRobo Designed for Tactical tasks Can Pilot vehicles “Pretty clever building a machine to cut half the work for you,” Twilight said Boomstick: What's this guy's deal with eggs? “That’s a good question. What is his deal with eggs?” Applejack asked, wanting to know the answer. Wiz: On its own, Silver Sonic appears slow and bulky but it is powered by a Chaos Emerald, making it a much faster and more practical machine. Silver Sonic Can fly with Rocket Shoes Powered by a Chaos Emerald “Silver Sonic?” Rainbow said in disappointment. Fluttershy knowing how Rainbow Dash talks and is, quietly said, “Uh oh.” Boomstick: Then he made another robo-hog, Mecha Sonic, who focuses on firepower over speed! Wiz: Mecha Sonic can even absorb Chaos energy to attain a short lived Super Form. “That’s pretty impressive,” Rarity said. Rainbow Dash just grunts while glaring at the Sonic imitation. Mecha Sonic Slower and tougher than Silver Greater Focus on Firepower Can Absorb and Use Chaos Energy Boomstick: But Eggman wanted more than just Sonic bots. Mecha Knuckles can glide and vomit giant rockets... Mecha Knuckles Fires Large Rockets “Knuckles? That name sounds Nice,” commented Applejack. Wondering why that name struck a chord with her. “Why would anyone want to make a robot that vomits rockets?” Rarity said, disgusted at the imagery those words brought. Wiz: And E-101 Beta remains one of Eggman's most versatile machines. “How so?” everyone wondered. Boomstick: He's a flying robot with Super Speed, teleportation and a reflector shield! He shoots homing missiles and Kamehameha's and has one of my favorite defensive abilities ever, the backhand! “That’s pretty versatile for a robot,” Twilight said, writing down a few notes. E-101 Beta Mk. II Can fly and teleport Homing missiles Wide RoE laser beams Wiz: The Shadow Androids are fast and durable and typically fight in groups of three. However, their design is so complex, they sometimes glitch in close combat. And speaking of glitches, despite being an absolute genius, Dr. Eggman appears to suffer from a peculiar personality disorder that sent him through several different "phases". Shadow Android Has Shadow's Physical abilities Fires small rockets “Now he’s ripping off Shadow!” ranted Spike, getting nods from everyone. Boomstick: Let's just hope that Scratch and Grounder phase doesn't show up today. Scratch and Grounder “Wow, they look useless,” Pinkie said, a little disappointed at them. Wiz: But none of Eggman's creations have ever been as deadly or as successful as his ultimate killing machine... Boomstick: Hyper Metal Sonic ! “WHAT?” Rainbow yelled, flying a bit higher as she glared at the robotic monstrosity. “Uh-oh…” everyone else muttered. (*Cues: Final Boss Theme - Sonic CD*) Wiz: Metal Sonic was specifically designed to be better than Sonic the Hedgehog in every way and was a complete success. Metal can move much faster than Sonic, easily reaching near mach 5 speeds. Metal's abilities include Sonic's spin dash and homing attack, along with the impenetrable Black Shield. “There’s no why this hunk junk is better then Sonic!” yelled Rainbow Dash. “Ya gettin a little bit angry there for your boyfriend Dash?” smirked Applejack, getting a few laughs from the rest of the group but Rainbow Dash just ignores them and keeps her attention on the screen. Boomstick: He's also got a chest laser, rocket powered flight and the Maximum overdrive attack, where he overloads his circuits to create a glowy energy field that'll burn through pretty much anything! “That’s more deadly than dragon fire,” muttered a nervous spike. (*Cues: Sonic 3 - Final Boss Orchestral Remix*) Wiz: And that's not all. Somehow, Eggman managed to make Metal Sonic an ever evolving force. Metal has the uncanny ability to scan and copy data from others, flawlessly replicating their abilities. “That might be a problem,” Pinkie said, munching on some popcorn. Boomstick: Damn, Eggman sure stepped up his game! “I'll say!” gasped Twilight. Wiz: Obtaining enough power can transform Metal into a number of more impressive forms, all of which increase his abilities immeasurably. “Yet this loser still lost to the original,” grinned Rainbow Dash. “Because Sonic never gives up!” cheered Pinkie Pie and Spike as all three of them cheered. Boomstick: The only downside to giving Metal Sonic a super brain is Eggman sometimes has trouble keeping him in line. “That’s dangerous to give a robot the ability to think for itself,” Twilight said, thinking Eggman isn’t that bright. “At least you won’t try and make some kind of robot, egghead,” Rainbow said teasingly. Metal Sonic Top Speed: Mach 5 255 cc 4 Valve Fusion Engine Max Output - 55 ps/600 rpm Max Torque - 7.54 kg-m/4000 rpm Weaponry Sonic's abilities Black Shield Chest Laser Maximum Overdrive Scan and Copy Ability Wiz: But even with his metallic minions waging his war, Dr. Eggman is perfectly willing to step into the battlefield himself. He pilots the Eggmobile, a fast single man pod with twin mounted Machine Guns. The Eggmobile's most vital function, however, is its universal compatibility to operate almost all of Eggman's machines. “That’s pretty clever to make something like that,” admitted Twilight as she was writing all this down. “Now darling, don’t go and make an evil army on us,” teased Rarity. Getting an eye roll from her alicorn friend. Boomstick: Like the humongous Death Egg Robot with its spiked rocket arms and lasers! Egg Mobile A.K.A. 'Eggo-Matic' Universal Compatibility Attachable Wrecking Ball 2 Machine Guns Mounts "Death Egg Robot" Flight Rocket Arms Laser Cannon Wiz: Eggman is vicious and clever. He's an expert at playing his opponent's right into his hands. At the same time, though, he can be overly obsessive to the point of overlooking some important factors in an effort to concentrate on a single goal. But while this can be a perilous game for Eggman, it also makes him dangerously unpredictable. “Kind of reminds me of Starlight back when she was evil,” commented Spike. Still wondering how she thought messing with the past of the bearers of the elements of harmony wouldn’t have disastrous results. Eggman: A nice dream. But dreams are meant to be... He uses his rocket boots to fly out of the hole as Antoine runs in fear. Eggman: ...BROKEN! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ After Eggman’s segment was over the girls agreed while he did have some powerful machines but single mindedness and lack of forethought made him more likely lose. That and Fluttershy was still glaring daggers at the screen. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Dr. Wily (*Cues: Unknown Theme*) Wiz: After being continuously out-shined by his insensitive colleague, Dr. Light, Dr. Albert W. Wily turned to a life of crime in an attempt to achieve fame and power. The group felt bad about the old man constantly being out shine and the jealousy that comes from it can eat away at a pony. Background Full Name: Dr. Albert W. Wily Age: 57 Ex-Professor of the Robot University of Technology PhD: Electronics Engineering Knows Ninjitsu Boomstick: How did he plan to get so famous, you ask? By taking over the world! “OF COURSE!!!” yelled Pinkie Pie while wearing a red peaked cap with a gold skull with wings pin on it. Wiz: Whether through his own engineering or impressive hacking, over the years, Wily developed a large, diverse robot army built on the ideals of both solid defense and ranged firepower. Mets, Sniper Joes and Bladers make up the bulk... Boomstick: With Hotheads and Elephants, oh my! “Those do seem like more rounded foot soldier,” said Twilight. “Not only are they stronger but they have weapons to counter their weaknesses,” she continued. “Better than Eggman’s,” Fluttershy said bitterly, liking the fact that Dr Wily at least doesn’t use poor innocent animals as part the robots. Robot Infantry Met Defensive Hard Hats Sniper Joe Defensive shield Blader Flying Recon Robot Hothead Throws Fire, but Cannot Move Paozo Vacuum Powered Action Wiz: Wily is a mastermind in more than just hardware. His Roboenza virus is a deadly disease for robots, making them unstable and violent with no regard for human life. The group had to shudder at such a weapon that could turn even the most docile of machines into killing machines. Roboenza Virus Created by Wily Only Affects Robots Makes Robots Violent & Unreasonable Precursor for Wily's Maverick Virus Boomstick: But Wily's weirdest bot is definitely the Yellow Devil, a giant pulsating yellow blob thing that pulls itself apart and uses its own body as a weapon. “That robot seems to be quite versatile and dangerous,” Rarity said, feeling that it would be a challenge to beat this thing. “And a constant source of rage for gamers,” Pinkie said, her friends look at her weirdly. Yellow Devil Height: Approx 20 ft Can Shapeshift Dismantles and Uses Own Body as a Weapon Immune to Cold Weak to Fire & Electricity Near-Indestructible Body, but the Eye is Vulnerable (*Cues: Guts Man Theme (Techno Remix)*) Wiz: Wily's army is led by his Robot Masters. Guts Man was a civil engineering machine remade as a powerhouse who can lift over two tons. “Guess he would have to be strong if he was made for construction,” Twilight said, secretly writing down some more notes. “(whistle) wish i had that fella working at the farm,” said Applejack, thinking about how both Big Mac and Gutsman could get the harder jobs done in no time. Robot Masters Guts Man Super Arm; Lifts Over 2 Tons Immune to cold Boomstick: Metal Man was made specifically for killing things. You can tell 'cause he's got evil red eyes! “Eeeep!” squeaked Fluttershy as she hid behind her Doomguy plushie. Metal Man Metal Blade; 8-Directional Death Designed for combat Weak to his own weapon Wiz: He wields ceramic titanium Metal Blades, one of the deadliest weapons in video game history, and is made of lightweight material, making him quick-footed. “But is he faster than me,” Rainbow said, challenging the robot. “No but 10 bits say he makes you into confetti!” Pinkie Pie said with a cheerful Smile scaring the rest of the group. Boomstick: Slash Man is fast and agile and wields the Slash Claw, a portable alien blade that's designed to destroy asteroids! (pause) OK. “How and why!” asked a confused Twilight who was wondering why someone make something like that. Slash Man Slash Claw; Destroys Asteroids Red Adhesive; Traps enemies Wiz: Magnet Man is a tactical fighter who uses homing Magnet Missiles and the Magnet shield to outmaneuver enemies. And then there's Sheep Man. Originally designed to actually herd sheep, he was reprogrammed by Wily to turn into clouds, get bored easily and fall apart when hit by rubber baseballs. “Magnet Man’s missiles could be used to disarm any enemy,” Rarity said, seeing those missiles as a useful projectile for the guards. Boomstick/Rainbow Dash: What the fu- Magnet Man Magnet Missile; Homing Sheep Man Originally designed to herd sheep; Electric powers Wiz: Napalm Man is a walking weapon. Boomstick: And a robot Master after my own heart. He likes blowing shit up so much, that he built his own weapons museum, and then blew it up! “Yay! Explosions!” cheered Pinkie Pie. “Pinkies scaring me,” Spike said to an equally nervous Twilight. Napalm Man Napalm Bomb; A Bouncing Bomb Missiles: Numerous types Wiz: Pharaoh Man possesses a large arsenal of mysterious powers including fireballs, energy waves, teleportation, a magic shield and levitation. “A robot using magic?” questioned Twilight confused on how it could do that. Boomstick: And he's also known for being a little punch-happy! (Pharaoh man punches MegaMan, showing while MegaMan Might now have his powers he still doesn't have any of his fucks.) “HA!” laughed Rainbow Dash. Pharaoh Man Pharaoh Shot; Controls Fire Energy Levitation Eye Shield Wiz: But Dr. Wily's Ultimate Robot Master is none other than Bass, “Cool name,” admitted Rainbow Dash. (*Cues: Megaman 7 - Bass Theme (Remix)*) Wiz: a direct Imitation of his Nemesis, Mega Man. Boomstick: He even has a robo-dog helper called Treble. “Aww,” Fluttershy said, thinking he’s not so bad. Wiz: Bass is powered by Bassnium, an extremely potent and unique energy source. Boomstick: Bassnium? You just made that up. Wiz: I wish I did. “Hey if it works it doesn’t matter what it’s called,” Applejack said. Boomstick: Well, he wields the Bass Buster, an arm cannon that has both rapid fire and Charge shot settings. Wiz: He is programmed to be able to copy any action he has seen. If he gets a hold of another's weapon, he can use it to the same effectiveness as the original owner. “That’s deadly!” gasped Twilight. Thinking of a machine that could pick up any weapon and wield them like a master. Boomstick: He can also fuse with Treble using the Super adapter creating... Super Bass! This made everyone look at Bass in awe as they thought of fusing with their own pets. The thought brought some giggles as they agreed tit was a silly idea. Wiz: Bass is extremely powerful but fairly brash and arrogant. He seeks to prove he is the strongest robot warrior there is and will even disobey Dr. Wily's orders if he thinks they impede his goal. Though he will not kill his creator, he has occasionally attacked him. “So just like Metal Sonic,” Spike asked “At least he won’t kill his creator,” Fluttershy said, still not liking he would hurt Dr Wily. Bass Bass Buster Charge Shot Rapid Fire Jet Booster Powered by Bassnium Super Adapter Copy Ability (*Cues: Wily Machine (Arranged) - Mega Man 9*) Boomstick: That's when Wily busts out his personal fighting vehicle! Wiz: The Wily Machine has gone through several variations... Boomstick: ...Even a dinosaur! “COOOL!” cheered Spike along with Pinkie Pie and Rainbow Dash. Wiz: Though Wily's favorite appears to be machine #8. Boomstick: Good old 8 can fly, launch missiles and has a triple barrel laser cannon and a Boomerang Buzzsaw. “That truly is a vehicle of death right their,” shuddered Rarity, imagining that thing flying over ponyville. Wily Machine 8 Houses Wily Capsule Rocket-Powered Flight Missile Launcher Boomerang Buzzsaw Tri-Barrel Laser Blaster Large Laser Cannon Within Skull Wiz: It also houses Wily's personal transportation, the Wily Capsule. Boomstick: Which makes the worst sound you've ever heard in your life! (cue Wily Capsule sound) Boomstick: Make it stop! MAKE IT STOP! (groan) Surprisingly, everyone agreed with Boomstick, even Rarity. “Oh sweet celestia make it stop!!” cried Rarity, as everyone was covering their ears. Wiz: Wily designs and commands his robots with long term strategy in mind and, as a result, often keeps his team as flexible as possible, though this means each robot has specific exploitable weaknesses. As a unit, Wily's team is prepared for anything. “That’s what you need in an army, solders that can work together and cover the other's weakness,” lectured Twilight. “Learn about that for your Robot army?” teased Rainbow Dash getting some laughter from the group. Twilight rolled her eyes as she smiled at her friends. Dr. Wily: I will create Chaos, destroy everything, and the best part, ooh, the very best part is... He prepares to activate his laser. Dr. Wily: ...I have finally gotten the best of Dr. Light! *laughs maniacally* Wiz: Alright the combatants are set, let's end this debate once and for all. Boomstick: But first, we got an advertisement from… uh... Wiz: Actually, Boomstick, we don't need to do those anymore. Boomstick/everyone: Really? Wiz: Absolutely. Boomstick: Freedom! It's time for an addless Death Battlllllllleeeeeeexceptforthebeginningunlessyouradvantagewhichreallyhelpsussupportthisshowsowecanmakemorethingsfighteachothertothedeaththankyouweloveyou! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ They girls quickly decided not to choose side.Though Fluttershy was hoping that eggman lost. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Death Battle (*Cues: Sonic 3 - Final Boss Orchestral Remix*) The armies of Both Dr. Eggman and Dr. Wily confront each other, with Dr. Eggman and Dr. Wily leading in their Eggmobile and Wily UFO respectively. “Robot war!” cheered everyone. FIGHT! (*Cues: Last Battle - Hard Destruction Mix*) Eggman: Attack!!! For the Eggman Empire! Wily: Fool! My firepower is superior! Attack! “To war!!” yelled Spike and Dash, as Pinkie blew on a war horn. Applejack winced at the horn. Three Buzz Bombers fire at four Mets but thanks to their protective hard hats, the Mets are protected and destroy the Buzz Bombers. Three Moto Bugs charge at a Paozo, but get bowled over by a ball thrown by the Paozo. Two Sniper Joes jump over the Paozo and begin to destroy a group of Egg Pawns until only two of them are left standing. Three SWATbots appear to aid the Egg Pawns but they cannot get through the Sniper Joes' shields. Instead, the Sniper Joes return fire and destroy the Egg Pawns and SWATbots. “Eggman’s foot soldiers are getting destroyed,” commented Rarity. “Good…” whispered Fluttershy as she glared at the robots that used poor animals as fuel. Wily: Haha! Your minions are outmatched! “Don’t brag just yet buster,” warned Applejack. Feeling like Wily just jinx himself with that little boast. Eggman: No matter. Get a load of this! E-101 Beta appears. Beta: Target confirmed. The group shudders at the intimidating robot. (*Cues: Crazy Robo ...Boss: E-101R - Sonic Adventure*) Beta flies over Wily's ground forces and destroys most of them with his lasers. He then backhands some Slicers into each other and swats the last one into the Camera. Four Mets are destroyed by a bomb dropped by the EggRobo. A trio of Shadow Androids dash past a duo of Hotheads, who begin lobbing lava rocks at them. Silver Sonic and Mecha Sonic show up and use their spindash moves to destroy the Hotheads. “And Eggman has sict his trump cards at Wily,” Pinkie Pie Said. “And man are they making short work on Wily’s bots!” added Rainbow Dash with a grin. “But that just means Wily’s just going to send his robot master now,” stated Twilight as she put her full focus onto the screen. (*Cues: We're the Robots - Mega Man 9*) Wily: Robot Masters! Go!!! “See!” Twilight said smugly. Getting a few eye rolls from her friends. Napalm Man, Metal Man, Slash Man, Guts Man and Pharaoh Man appear and begin to destroy Eggman's forces. Metal Man and Slash Man team up and fight back-to-back to destroy an Egg Pawn, three Buzzbombers, a Caterkiller and a Moto Bug. Magnet Man uses his powers to pull in Beta and the EggRobo before destroying them with his Magnet missiles. Mecha Sonic battles Pharaoh Man but Pharaoh Man's teleportation skills and Eye Shield successfully defend against him. Pharaoh Man then destroys Mecha Sonic with a yellow blast. Guts Man destroys Mecha Knuckles by throwing a Moto Bug at him. “It’s pure chaos out there,” said Applejack as she marveled at the wanted destruction and random explosions. “Ya… isn’t it beautiful?” asked Pinkie Pie as she at some more popcorn while wearing some 3-D glasses. Meanwhile, Napalm Man is chasing Silver Sonic whilst firing Missiles at him, but is hit by a blast which was fired by Metal Sonic, who is using his Black Shield. “It’s him…” muttered Rainbow Dash as she glared at Sonic’s copy. (*Cues: Sonic 3 - Final Boss Remake Orchestrated / Rock*) The group shuddered at the spine chilling music that started playing which caused Fluttershy to hug her plushie even harder. After deactivating his shield, Metal Sonic scans Napalm Man, claiming his abilities, then destroys Napalm Man's body, before flying over Sheep Man, (*Cues: Dr. Eggman's Theme - Adventures of Sonic the Hedgehog*) “This guy…” muttered Rarity with a blank stare. who is surrounded from both sides by Scratch and Grounder. “Those morons,” Applejack deadpanned. Scratch: Ba ha ha ha! Both Scratch and Grounder collide with Sheep Man, forming a dust cloud. Scratch: Watch out! I got him! Grounder: No, I got him! As the dust clears, Sheep Man is missing. "where'd he go?" spiked asked. Grounder: I thought you had him! Scratch: I thought YOU had him! “Idiots!” the two mares said at the same time as they both face hoofed. “Even I find them annoying.” deadpanned Pinkie. Sheep Man attacks the pair using lightning which knocks their heads off. As he descends to the floor, Grounder's head lands on Scratch's body and Scratch's head lands on Grounder's body. Suddenly, Silver Sonic destroys Scratch, Grounder and Sheep Man. “Good riddance.” everyone muttered. (*Cues: Stardust Speedway (Bad Future) - Sonic CD*) Silver Sonic then got destroyed by Bass, dropping the Green Chaos Emerald. Treble also stands at Bass' side. “Awww doggie!” cooed Fluttershy (*Cues: Magician's theme - The House of the Dead*) Bass: Oh yeah. I'm a badass. “Meh you're pretty cool I’ll give you that.” Rainbow said cheekily. “But he’s no Sonic huh?” grinned Applejack. Getting a glare from the blue mare. “SHUT! IT!” growled out Dash through gritted teeth. Wily: About time you showed up, Bass! The two of them notice the Chaos Emerald lying on the ground. “Uh-oh,” everyone said as they knew what kind of trouble that little gem can do. Wily: Wait. What's that Green thing? "Your downfall if you don’t do something,” said Rarity. Metal Sonic takes the Chaos Emerald and begins to transform into Neo Metal Sonic. “Too late,” said Spike with a worried look. Wily: Well... Good luck, Bass! “I can’t really blame him” Twilight said Wily proceeds to fly off. Bass: Finally! A worthy challenge! Several yellow blobs fly past Bass in Metal Sonic's direction. Bass/everyone: ?!? The blobs fly past Metal Sonic, who is still transforming, and form into the Yellow Devil. After Metal Sonic completes his transformation, the Yellow Devil entraps him with his hand. Eggman then flies in with the wrecking ball attached to the Eggmobile and attacks the Yellow Devil. Eggman: No! Get back, blob thing! “Go back at giving mega man players panic attacks when they hear your theme!” yelled out Pinkie Pie. Bass jumps over and shoots the chain supporting the wrecking ball. Eggman flies away as a Shadow Android attacks Bass with a homing attack, but Bass retaliates by shooting it while it is in the air. “I have to give Bazz some credit there that was a sweet move there.” admitted Rainbow Dash. Eggman: This is a disaster. Call in the Egg Fleet! Wily: Not so fast, Fatso! (*Cues: Boss Battle: Death Egg Robot - Sonic Generations*) Wily is inside his Wily Machine 8. Eggman laughs as he lowers his Eggmobile into his Death Egg Robot, then closes the top of it. The Wily Machine fires 5 blasts at the Death Egg Robo, who hits the Wily Machine with its spiked fists, only for it to fire two missiles at it. Meanwhile, Neo Metal Sonic escapes the Yellow Devil's clutches and takes out Guts Man and Slash Man. The Yellow Devil is knocked back by Metal Sonic then destroyed by two bombs. Bass runs in. “Man look at that fella go!” yelled a surprised Applejack as everyone sees Metal Sonic wipe the floor with the robot masters. Bass: Dr. Wily! Look out! Metal Sonic attacks the Wily Machine until it explodes. Wily flies out and lands in front of the Death Egg Robo. Wily: Wait! I admit defeat! Please spare me! “Not happening,” Twilight said. Knowing a villain like Eggman wouldn't Spare someone. The Death Egg Robot steps on Wily. Most of the group had to wince at eggman's lack of hesitation in killing his enemies. “See?” Twilight said with a flat tone. Eggman: Ho ho ho! Sucker!!! The Death Egg Robot steps backward and sees that it is a fake Wily. Eggman: What? It's a Dummy! Wily: Look who's talking. “(snort) ok I have to admit that’s pretty funny,” laughed Rarity of all ponies. (*Cues: Wily Machine Remix - Mega Man 9*) Eggman turns his robot around and sees Wily Machine 9. Treble walks forward, only to get knocked backwards by Metal Sonic and into Bass. Metal Man throws four Saw Blades at Metal Sonic, who uses his Black Shield to absorb them and send three of them to destroy Metal Man. Bass tries to shoot Metal Sonic from behind but Metal Sonic teleports behind him and attacks him. “Thouse two are really going at it!” cheered Spike as he took some offered popcorn Pinkie Pie Wily: Dumb robots! Why do I always have to do everything myself? Wily opens up his machine's mouth, which then launches a capsule of Roboenza at Metal Sonic, which shatters, unleashing a purple haze. “Did he just use the stuff that makes a robot into a killing machine?” asked a scared Fluttershy. “Yes. yes he did,” deadpanned Rarity as she was wondering what was going on in Wily’s mind. Wily: Ha! That's Roboenza! Looks like I win! Eggman: Not yet! Behold the almighty Egg Fleet! Up above Eggman and Wily, the Egg Fleet is in the sky, which consists of Mako Shark minor ships, Sawfish Battleships and the Egg Carrier. Eggman: Now it's over! I've won! As Eggman laughs, the Roboenza virus begins to take its effect over Metal Sonic, whose eyes glow bright red. Metal Sonic: Kneel before your master! “Ok… that’s scary,” Rainbow Dash said as a shudder goes down her spine. (*Cues: Born Again - Mega Man 9*) Metal Sonic proceeds to flies upward towards the Egg Fleet and begins to absorb them, beginning to transform. Eggman: Metal!!! What are you doing?!? “He’s gone berserk!” yelled a panicked Twilight. Bass: Oh no... Come on, Treble! Bass jumps into the air and uses the Super adapter to become Super Bass. As Metal Sonic's transformation nears its end, Bass shoots at him a few times, only to get blasted out of the sky by Metal Sonic's missiles. Metal Sonic completes his transformation into the Metal Overlord and destroys Bass with a laser, along with a Shadow Android, a Buzz Bomber and Pharaoh Man. He then goes on to destroy Dr. Eggman and his Death Egg Robot. Wily escapes Wily Machine 9 before it is destroyed by Metal Sonic. However, he is not quick enough to avoid Metal Sonic's onslaught of lasers and is eventually destroyed, then the screen goes White. Everyone could only stared wide eyed at the complete destruction of the city. K.O.! Results (*Cues: Boss Battle: Perfect Chaos Pt. 2 "Perfect Chaos REVIVAL!" - Sonic Generations*) Boomstick: Well, that world's fucked. Our bad. “You don’t say?” deadpanned Applejack. Wiz: So... I suppose technically Wily won because he used the Roboenza, which ultimately meant the end for Eggman. “Well he’s not wrong,” Twilight said, scratching her chin. Boomstick: But... then he died too... and that's technically Eggman's robot, soo… “Yeah, can’t be his win if he’s dead,” Rainbow said, trying to figure out the outcome of the battle. Wiz: Then the winner is... uh... Boomstick: Metal Sonic? Wiz: Metal Sonic. “Uh, I guess so?” Applejack asked unsure of what to say while looking at the others.Her friends just shrugged at that. “Metal Wins!” yelled Pinkie Pie as she threw confetti in the air. END! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ After the battle, the girls walked over to the glowing box to see what they got this time. As Twilight opened the box, there were comics inside as she grabbed them with her magic. “So more comic, Twi?” Applejack asked, getting a few for Applebloom. “Yeah, but at least we get some interesting stuff,” Twilight said, taking a few of both Sonic and Megan Man comics. “Yeah and it’s cool to have comic no one else would have,” Rainbow said, putting a bunch of Sonic comics in her saddlebag. “I’m sure you like those comics for another reason,” Rarity sang, giving Rainbow a sly look. This caused Rainbow to blush then fly out of the castle faster than Pinkie catching a promise breaker. Everyone laughed as Fluttershy said, “Well this was fun but I need to go back home. Angel Bunny must be hungry.” She flew towards the door while the Doomguy plushie was on her back like a tiny jockey. “I need to get back and take care of a few chores,” Applejack said, waving goodbye while walking out the door. Soon all her friends said their goodbyes and left the castle as Spike and Twilight were the only ones left. Spike got off the couch and asked, “So did this episode give you any new ideas for your project?” “I got a few ideas with this episode and these comic just might help as well,” Twilight said, walking over towards a bookcase and pulling a book out of the self. The book slowly returns to its original position as the bookcase began to swing open revealing a dimly lit stairway. Twilight walked down the stairs as Spike followed and reached some kind of Lab. In the center was a table with a white sheet covering something.as Twilight walked towards the table. “You still have a problem with it?” Spike asked, staying near the door. “Yes and I’m hoping that with everything we saw, I can fix the problem it’s having,” Twilight said, moving the white sheet to show a robot face with a small visor were its eyes should be and a rainbow wig. Flicking a switch, the robot seemed to come to life and said, “Crush, Destroy, Kill, Swag.” Flicking the same switch, the robot powered down as Twilight said, “Wish I knew why It said that.” ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ CHAPTER END! NEXT TIME ZELDA VS PEACH!
Zelda VS PeachThe door to Twilight’s castle opened as her five friends walked in. Once they were inside, they made their way to the viewing room to be greeted by Twilight and Spike already there. “Howdy, Twi, Spike,” Applejack said as the others voiced their own hellos. Spike waved at them as Twilight grumble a half hearted hello. “Are you alright, darling?” Rarity asked, concerned for her friend. “Just didn’t sleep last night,” Twilight said, yawning a bit. “What had a lot on your mind silly filly?” Pinkie asked, bouncing over to the couch and taking a seat. Twilight didn’t say anything as she thought about last night. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ “Crush, kill, destroy, sw-w-ag,” the robot said, stuttering a bit. “WHY CAN’T I FIX YOU?” Twilight yelled, hitting her robot with a wrench in frustration. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ “You can say that. But how about you get us some snack and we can watch the next episode,” Twilight said, feeling herself wake up a bit. “That sounds like a grad idea, Twiley,” a familiar cheerful voice said from the doorway. Everyone turned to see Princess Cadance. “Cadance,” Twilight said, rushing over to her sister-in-law. “Sunshine, sunshine, ladybugs awake, clap your hooves and give a little shake,” the two said while doing their little dance. After the dance, they hugged each other as Twilight’s friends just watched. Once they separated from the hug, Twilight said, “What’re you doing here, Cadance?” “Well, I needed so time away from Flurry Heart and decided to visit,” Cadance said, following Twilight into the room. “Really?” Twilight asked, excited to have Cadance over. “Yes and Shining told me about the show. So I figured I could see you and this show that Shining liked,” Cadance said, taking a seat. “Oh, before I start the episode, do you know what happened to Starlight?” Twilight said, feeling a bit worried for her friend. “I’m sorry Twilight But the train she was on crashed in the middle of a tundra. I had my guards searching the wreckage and they told me that they found no body,” Cadance said, trying to calm down her sister-in-law. “Where could she be?” Twilight asked herself. “I wouldn’t worry Twilight. If Starlight can hold her own against you, then she can handle walking to the next town,” Spike said, grabbing a cup. “You sure Spike? Starlight might be hurt,” Twilight said, panicking a little bit. “Relax, Twilight I’m sure she’s fine,” Spike said. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ where in the world is Starlight Glimmer?~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "I AM NOT OK!" screamed Starlight as she fired another magic bolt at another living pony skeleton as a horde shuffled over towards her. "All trespassers shall be punished in the name of our mistress nightmare moon!" hissed out one of the lich's in the horde. "CELESTIA BUCKING DAMMIT!!!" yelled the mare as she shot another volley of magic blast at the demonic horde. Who knew walking through a grave that was near Everfree forest to get there faster would be a bad idea? "The undead? Really?" The disembodied voice of Trepp asked with a hint of boredom. "Heh what can I say? You can't beat the classics," commented Deadman as the two chaos gods watch the young mare fight her way through another obstacle the the Deadman had placed before her. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ “You’re probably right,” Twilight said, pushing play on the remote. Interlude (*Cues: Invader - Jim Johnston*) Wiz: Today we're pitting two of the most worthless damsels in distress against each other. “That seems a bit harsh,” Spike said, taking a bit out of a gem. Boomstick: If they're not getting kidnapped, they're always nagging at you to do stuff. Wiz: Princess Zelda, from the realm of Hyrule… “That’s quite the elegant dress,” Rarity said, taking every detail of the dress. Boomstick: ...and Princess Peach, of the Mushroom Kingdom. “I love the dress,” Pinkie said, shoving a cupcake in her mouth as Rarity took a scroll and quill to sketch the dress down. She wants to see if she can recreate them for herself or maybe a fashion line. “So it’s a battle between princesses? That’s interesting,” Twilight said “This would have been a good episode for Aunt Celestia and Luna,” Cadance said giggling a bit. Wiz: I'm Wiz and he's Boomstick, and it's our job to analyze their weapons, armor, and skills to find out who would win a Death Battle. Zelda (*Cues: Ocarina of Time - Zelda's Lullaby (Orchestrated)*) Wiz: Being a descendent of the house of Hyrule, Princess Zelda has spent her entire life governing her kingdom. Despite having a king, the majority of royal decisions are actually made by her. “You know that has me thinking why do we call Celestia and Luna princesses instead Queens?” asked Applejack. “Well from what aunty Celestia told me was that during the whole Sombra situation and a lot of other bad Ponies that had the title of King and Queen made the titles themselve look at with disdain during the early rean of the two sisters,” Cadence explained in great detail. “So…what you're saying is Sombra and some other losers made being called king and queen a bad thing?” Rainbow Dash simplified getting a nod from the princess of love. “Exactly Rainbow Dash!” praised the pink princess with a big smile. Getting a bashful blush from the blue mare. “Huh? And I thought it was to sell toys,” said Pinkie Pie with a shrug, getting a few odd looks sent her way. Boomstick: Talk about a control freak. And why do they let her get away with it? I mean, she's lost her kingdom to the forces of evil more times than I can count! “So what? Three time?” snarked Rarity. Getting a chorus of laughter from the rest of the group Wiz: Between being waited on hand and foot, Zelda has spent some time training with her modest arsenal. “At least she can fight,” Rainbow said, not feeling to impressed with Zelda. Background Full Name: Zelda Hyrule, Princess of Destiny Race: Hylian 7th Sage/Maiden Descendent of the Goddess, Hylia Blessed with Wisdom of Nayru Stubborn & Feisty Noble & Wise Boomstick: Bows, magic, musical instruments. She also has a sword and dagger, but has little experience with them. Her weapon of choice is the bow, which she wields with deadly accuracy. Plus, she can use her magic to turn an ordinary arrow to the powerful Light Arrow, perfect for killing evil. “I should look to see if there’s a spell like that in the archives,” Cadance said to herself as the others were awed by Zelda’s powers. “Those arrows would make things so much simpler,” Rarity said, shaking her head. Those arrows could have helped them during the Changeling invasion if they would work. “They could've easily stop that mean old Sombra from hurting any ponie,” added in Fluttershy as she held her Doomguy plushie tighter while she remembered the evil monster that called itself a king. Weaponry Royal Sword Dagger Light Bow (Weapon of Choice) Light Arrow (Destroys Evil, can even damage phantoms) Wiz: Speaking of which, Zelda is an incredibly potent spellcaster. While most of her magic is for use out of combat, she is more than capable of holding on her own. She can teleport with Farore's Wind, shield herself with Nayru's Love, and cast pyrokinetic projectiles with Din's Fire. Magic Minor Telekinesis Prophetic Dreams One-Way Telepathy Farore's Wind Nayru's Love DIn's Fire Healing Spells “Strange names. Do they mean something?” Applejack asked getting no answer from her friends. Boomstick: Also, she can talk... with dead people. “Eeep!” squeaked Fluttershy. Wiz: Spirits. Boomstick: Like Boos? “What are Boos?,” asked Rainbow Dash. (*Cues: Legend of Zelda: Skyward Sword - Ballad of the Goddess*) Wiz: Zelda is also the bearer of the Triforce of Wisdom, a testament to her astute mind. This greatly enhances her magical prowess and gives her the power to dispel evil. She is even skilled enough to create long-lasting disguises. She used the guise of Shiek to evade Ganon's tyranny for over seven years. “That must of been hard, hiding away as you kingdom fell into the hands of some maniac,” sad Twilight Sadly. Boomstick: Wait, that's a chick?? But where's her...um... “Don’t you dare ask that Boomstick,” hissed out Rarity. Wiz: It SHOULD be noted however that the forms of Sheik and Tetra are nothing more than disguises, and abilities attributed to them would naturally be available to Zelda. Triforce of Wisdom 1/3 of the Triforce Enhances Magical Ability Leads Bearer to Wise Decisions Protects Bearer from Evil Creates Faultless Disguises (Sheik of the Sheikah, Tetra the Pirate Captain) Boomstick: Yeah, but why would you want to toss tiny needles at people when you can shoot fireballs with your mind? “Agreed,” said everyone. Wiz: While Zelda is clever, mystically powerful, and helps battle Ganon when necessary, she repeatedly relies on the aid of others. Her success at avoiding capture can be largely attributed to her guardians and sanctuaries. “Sounds like she can’t do anything for herself,” grumbled Applejack. “How does she get anything done?” asked Spike. “While I can understand keeping the rulers safe and all but aunty Celestia taught me all i know in magical combat and I've even saw her and aunty Luna train in the their private training room,” said Cadance. Getting a little annoyed with the more she heard about the princess. Boomstick: She's really good at getting other people to do stuff for her. “Uge… those kind of nobles,” sighed an annoyed Twilight. Never liking some of the snooty nobles in canterlot that would get the royal guards to do their dirty work for them. Wiz: Right, she is a master manipulator. She can always convince a naive young hero to do her dirty work for her with little or no reward. Feats Escaped Capture as Sheik for 7 Years Leader of the 7 Sages Never Questioned by her Subjects Briefly Trained in Combat with Link Often Helps Finish off Ganon Usually Relies on Guardians & Sanctuaries “Now that's just not right!” ranted Rainbow Dash, thinking that not rewarding someone for doing your job was a huge load of bull. “You could've at least thrown him a party.” added an annoyed Pinkie Pie. Boomstick: How many times does this guy have to save you? Put out already! “I already did,” Cadance said to herself with a silent giggle thinking about her brave knight back home and the time he would save her and get a “reward” for his brave deeds. For some reason Twilight felt a little sick and embarrassed for some reason and she doesn't know why. Link: You called for a hero, princess? Zelda: Yes! But I guess you'll have to do. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ The girls and one dragon thought that while Zelda had the powers and equipment. They believed that she lacked experience to actually fight. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Peach (*Cues: SSBM - Princess Peach's Castle*) Wiz: At first glance, Princess Peach appears to be your standard meek and helpless damsel-in-distress. “Oh?” everyone said hoping to hear about a princess that was more active in her role in defending her kingdom. Boomstick: And that's pretty damn accurate. Being a member of the Royal Toadstool family, Peach spends most of her time getting herself kidnapped, or baking cakes in the kitchen like any good woman should. The girls didn't know what to be madder at. Boomstick’s comment or the fact that Peach was going to be another let down. Wiz: Despite being a wealthy princess with a royal guard more than capable of defending the castle, she has been kidnapped over a dozen times. Background Full Name: Princess Peach Toadstool of the Mushroom Kingdom Favors Technique over Power Classy & Graceful Resourceful & Athletic Generous to a fault Has been playable in 39+ of her 57+ games “How many time?” asked a wide eyed Twilight and Cadance. “Oh boy,” groaned out Spike as he knew he was going to have to keep the two princesses calm during this one. Boomstick: Yet somehow, while still behind bars, she can send mail to Mario through outer space containing items and extra lives. Hey lady, next time, just send yourself! “That seems really ridiculous and that's coming from me!” yelled Pinkie Pie. “How is that even possible?” questioned an annoyed Twilight. Wiz: Peach is an extremely athletic and capable fighter. She has participated in a variety of different sports, including soccer, basketball, and kart racing, and has survived every Mario Party. And as we've said before, Mario Party is no walk through the park. “At least she seems to keep herself in shape and stays active,” complemented Rarity, impressed the delicate looking princess could survive a death trap like mario party. Boomstick: Peach's unique array of weaponry includes a tennis racket, golf club, frying pan, and turnips! Which she can apparently pull out of her... “Boomstick!” yelled Rarity as Twilight covered Spike’s ears. “You know at this point i've seen so much from this show should you even care what i hear at this point?” deadpanned Spike. Wiz: She ALSO wields Perry the Parasol, an umbrella capable of powerful strikes and magical properties. Weaponry Tennis Racquet Golf Club Frying Pan Turnips (Can be plucked from any location) Perry the Parasol (Can transform to suit terrain, stun enemies) Peach Bomber “It looks cute,” whispered Fluttershy as she stared at the happy looking parasol. Boomstick: Oh, and one of her most valuable weapons is her ass! She can hit someone with that thing so hard that something down there explodes. “Sigh…” Rarity could only shake her head in annoyance. “Dem peaches,” said Pinkie Pie. biting her lip and wear a pair of sunglasses. (*Cues: Mario Strikers Charged - Peach's Theme*) Wiz: Peach also wields a form of magic called Heart Power. With it, she can float in midair for an indefinite period of time, cast healing spells, and summon lambs from the sky to put her foes to sleep. “Those seem like… interesting powers.” commented Twilight not really knowing how to feel about the last one. Boomstick: Don't pet that sheep, or you might wake up in a stranger's van. Even though the group didn’t know what a van was they at least get the joke and found it in poor taste. Wiz: And ever since being touched by the Vibe Scepter, she can channel her emotions into raw mystic power. When she rages, she becomes invulnerable but slows tremendously. Boomstick/Rainbow Dash: Hold up! Touched by the WHAT NOW??!! “Oh Celestia no,” whispered Rarity in dread. Wiz: The Vibe Scepter. It took a second for the rest of the girls to get what was the big deal about the name but when they did there face’s turn beat red. “Oh my,” squeaked out a beet red Fluttershy. Boomstick/Rainbow Dash/Pinkie Pie: (*laughs*) “Really?” asked Applejack as she gave a flat look to her two immature friends. Rarity could only cover her face in her hooves as she gave of a pained groan. Wiz: Oh.... (*clears throat*) But Peach's magic reaches its climax with- “Of sweet harmony,” groaned out Twilight. “Heh heh…” Cadence chuckled nervously. Boomstick/Rainbow Dash/Pinkie Pie: (*laughing uncontrollably*) Wiz: ...with her mega strike technique, Empress Peach, a kick so powerful, it splits a soccer ball into three separate ones, delivering enough force to score three times. Boomstick/ Dash and Rainbow: (*continues laughing*) STOP! I CAN'T TALK! “Stop laughing!!!” screamed a crimson faced Rarity. “NEVER!!” laughed the two laughing mares. Vibe Powers Joy: Wind-Powered Flight Gloom: Increases Speed & Damaging Tears Calm: Creates a Healing Bubble Rage: Invulnerability & Increases Weight Mega Strike Empress Peach Wiz: Peach's Heart Power also naturally dispels evil magics, which is the actual reason why Bowser always kidnaps her. “Huh, makes sense it’s like if someone tried to capture us back when we had the elements of harmony,” said Twilight. Boomstick: Really? I thought it was because of... well... “Don’t. You. Dare,” Rarity gritted out. Wiz: Peach has assisted Mario in battles several times, once even saving him from Bowser on her own. Even so, she still needs rescuing on a daily basis, and her gratitude usually only goes as far as a kiss and a cake. “Well at least she’s willing to fight,” commented Applejack. “And she gives Mario a reward at the end,” added in Fluttershy. Boomstick: What's with all these princesses not puttin' out? Give it up already! “Shut up boomstick,” the two princesses in the room said in a flat tone. Feats Eager to Assist in Battle whenever she can. Once saved the Mario Bros. from Bowser Single-Handedly Survived every Mario Party Can Never avoid a kidnapping Awful Employer Bakes really good cakes Peach: Listen everybody! Let's bake a delicious cake... for Mario. “The cake better not be a lie,” growled out Pinkie Pie. Wiz: Alright, the combatants are set. Let's end this debate once and for all Boomstick: It's time for a Death Battle! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ While both combatants were interesting in their own ways the group decided to go neutral on this battle. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Death Battle Peach gently lands with her umbrella onto a wooden bridge in the Mushroom Kingdom as Zelda teleports in front of her. FIGHT! (*Cues: Super Mario RPG - Through the Tree Stumps and Mushrooms (Remix)*) Peach pulls two turnips out from the bridge and throws them towards Zelda, who deflects them back at her with Nayru's Love, causing them to hit Peach. She then begins crying and runs towards Zelda, who begins slipping due to Peach's tears leaving a trail of tears on the ground, then Peach jumps back and uses Peach Bomber, knocking Zelda back. Zelda then teleports behind Peach and kicks her into the air, then casts Din's Fire multiple times, knocking her further into the air. Zelda then teleports by Peach, kicking her multiple times, before kicking her downwards toward the ground. Zelda then teleports back onto the bridge and uses a charged strike, knocking Peach further back, who shouts. “Wow for a dainty little thing this Zelda can put up a fight,” Applejack said surprised at the ferocity that the the two princes were showing. Peach then gets up and uses Heart Power to summon a Sleepy Time Sheep, which appears in front of her, flies upward into the air, then downward towards Zelda. Zelda uses Nayru's Love once again to deflect the sheep back at Peach, who then knocks it back into the air with a swing of her umbrella. “Sheepy no!” cried Fluttershy as she saw the poor sheep fly off in the atmosphere. Zelda then teleports in front of Peach and slaps her, to which Peach slaps Zelda back. The two then trade slaps until Zelda is dazed, allowing Peach to bring out a frying pan and hit Zelda with it, bouncing her back twice. “Peach is not letting up,” Twilight said surprised at the skill that Peach was showing. (*Cues: Final Demise - The Legend of Zelda: Skyward Sword*) Zelda gets up and prepares her bow and light arrow and Peach goes into a rage, walking slowly towards Zelda while surrounded by fire. Zelda then fires the light arrow at Peach, which cancels out Peach's vibe power, then causes the wooden bridge to shatter into tiny pieces. “Not the smartest thing to do,” Fluttershy said Dryly. Both Peach and Zelda begin falling, with Peach's fall controlled with the umbrella. Zelda teleports above her and begins firing Din's Fire multiple times while repeatedly teleporting, most of which miss, but one strikes Peach when she attempts deflecting it with her frying pan. Zelda then teleports in front of Peach, which Peach anticipates, and she begins striking Zelda with her umbrella and slaps, ending with her swinging her umbrella, knocking Zelda upward as Peach lands gracefully to the ground. “Gotta admit that Peachy can really fight!” cheered Pinkie Pie. (*Cues Staff Roll from The Legend of Zelda: Skyward Strike*) Peach then uses Heart Power, regenerating her four hearts. Zelda heals herself as well, regenerating her twelve hearts, then begins casting Din's Fire once again, which Peach counters by throwing turnips. Meanwhile, the Sleepy Time Sheep, which had been knocked into the air by Peach earlier, has now begun falling back down at increasing speeds as Peach and Zelda continue throwing their projectiles. Eventually, the sheep finally lands on Zelda, putting her to sleep while standing before disappearing. “Ok I call shenanigans on that!” yelled Spike. “Yay~ sheepy came back!” cheered Fluttershy. (*Cues: Mario Strikers Charged - Peach's Theme*) Peach: Alright! “Here we go!!!” yelled Rainbow Dash getting pump for the finisher. Peach then makes a huge leap backward, gains her Empress Peach wings, then flies toward Zelda and delivers the Mega Strike to her head. This causes Zelda's head to explode bloodily, as she cries out. Peach then lands, with her opponent decapitated. The group could only stare wide eyed at the brutal kill by the Mushroom Princess. Peach: Did I win? “Ya… in the most brutal way possible,” deadpanned Applejack. K.O.! Results (*Cues: Super Mario RPG - Forest Maze*) Boomstick/Rainbow Dash: GOOOAAAL!!! “Rainbow Dash!” yelled Pinkie Pie. “What?” asked a confused Rainbow Dash with a raised brow. “Too soon,” said Pinkie Pie while wearing red rim sunglasses. Wiz: Zelda's offensive arsenal is relatively limited and predictable compared to Peach's quirky repertoire. “Not only was it lacking but those light arrows only really hurt evil beings,” Twilight lectured. Boomstick: And while most of Peach's attacks aren't fatal, the mega strike, Empress Peach, gave her a leg up. “Already to the puns Boomstick,” asked Pinkie Pie a little disappointed at the host for jumping to the puns jokes. Wiz: See, a soccer ball is typically a kept add up to 12 psi, but since Peach's mega strike creates 2 more, it has enough force to add up to 24 pounds per square inch, or about 165,000 newtons per square meter, as of 1,000 newtons of can cause decapitation and 15 psi can shatter the human skull, the mega strike is so over-excessive it didn't just kill Zelda, it obliterated her. “Too much math…” groaned out Rainbow Dash as she held her poor head. “You can never have too much Math!” yelled Twilight as she held up a math book. Boomstick: She got kicked in the face really hard and it went boom. “Thank you,” said Rainbow Dash with a voice full of gratitude. “Spoilsports,” pouted Twilight. Wiz: Yeah, in layman's terms, I guess... Boomstick: Peach sure fleeced Zelda in this fight. “Better!” chirped Pinkie Pie happily. Wiz: The winner is Princess Peach. END! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Boomstick: Next time on Death Battle. It was dark. They heard thunder and saw lightning. When a lightning bolt struck, they saw a silhouette… in the shape of some kind of hammer. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ “That was interesting,” Cadance said, getting off the couch and onto her hooves. She saw Twilight and her friends walk towards a box as she said, “Is that the box that gives you stuff?” “Yeah and it gives us some awesome stuff like comics, shirts and stuff,” Rainbow said, hovering over the box. Twilight opens the box as Rarity lets out a happy little squeal. Inside the box were a bunch of dresses that Peach and Zelda wore. “Oh, these dresses are marvelous,” Rarity said, grabbing a dress and inspecting it. “Ugh, is there anything else in there?” Rainbow said, moving away from the box a bit. “Nope, that seems to be all that’s in there,” Twilight said, moving a few more dresses away. “Then I’m outta here,” Rainbow said, flying out the window. “Well today was interesting,” Cadance said, flying back home. “I’m gonna need to train once I get home. Don’t want to end up like Peach or Zelda,” she said, thinking of where to start on her workout. Maybe Shining would have an idea.
Thor VS Raiden.The girls were sitting in the viewing room while Pinkie and Spike were in the kitchen, getting some snacks for everyone. The others were discussing who could be the next combatants. “So all we know is that either one or both use a hammer,” Rainbow said, scratching her chin. “Maybe. It could be just one of them,” Applejack said, speaking her own thoughts. “Then what can the other fighter have?” Twilight asked, looking at her friends. “It is possible that the other combatant can use lightning,” Rarity said, causing everypony to look at her. “If you remember, the trailer showed a lightning bolt.” Before anypony could say anything, the room was filled with a bright light that blinded everypony. When the light died down, the occupants of the room saw none other than Princess Celestia standing there. “Princess Celestia,” Twilight said, running up to her mentor. “Hello, Princess Twilight,” Celestia said, smiling at her former student. “What’re you doing here? Not that I mind,” Twilight said, smiling bashfully. “I had a bit of free time and thought that I could watch another episode with you and your friends,” Celestia said, walking over to the couch. “We’d be happy for you to join us,” Twilight said as her friends nodded and Pinkie with Spike came out of the kitchen with snacks. “Hey princess,” Spike and Pinkie said greeting their guest. Celestia gave them a smile as she said, “Now that everyone’s here, we can can watch the episode, right?” “Of course,” Twilight said,grabbing the remote and pressing play. Interlude (*Cues: Invader - Jim Johnston*) Wiz: The gods of thunder may endure eternal rule, but in the ring together, they are anything but immortal. “Oh my!” where seeing a fight between gods!” gasped out Rarity. “So coool~!” cheered out Rainbow dash. Boomstick: The mighty Thor, prince of Asgard... “A god and a prince?” asked Applejack, surprised at the title combo. “He seems nice,” whispered Fluttershy. While everyone was talking about the prince of Asgard no one noticed Celestia giving a surprised look at the first fighters introduction. Wiz:...and Lord Raiden, defender of Earthrealm. “So he’s a guardian god,” commented Celestia. Shaking of her previous shock. Boomstick: He's Wiz and I'm Boomstick. Wiz: And it's our job to analyze their weapons, armor, and skills to find out who would win a DEATH BATTLE. Thor (*Cues: Thor (2011) - Sons of Odin*) Boomstick: In Norse mythology, Thor is the god of thunder, strength, healing, and...oak trees? Well regardless, he was badass enough to get his own comic book. “What’s wrongs oak trees?” said Twilight with a glare. Still sore about what happened to her old home. Background: Real Name: Thor Odinson the Mighty Height: 6'6" Weight: 640 lbs. Secret Identity: Dr. Donald Blake Skilled Surgeon & Medic Guardian of Midgard A.K.A. Earth Superiority Complex Wiz: Thor Odinson was conceived between the Allfather and Earth's Elder Goddess with the intent of creating the strongest man in the universe. He can lift over a million tons, move at supersonic speeds, never feel exhaustion, survive the vacuum of space, and talk with frogs. “I’m surprised that you're not angry at another pony faster than you?” questioned Applejack getting a blank stare from Rainbow Dash. “Well I can’t can’t really compare to a god now can I?” said Rainbow Dash showing a great amount of maturity and humility. “That was quite mature of you Rainbow Dash,” praised Celestia with a motherly smile. Getting a bashful look from the blue mare. Boomstick: He's immune to poison, burns and electrocution, and he can survive the heat of the Sun, or even a planet-bursting explosion. Well, I guess that's what happens when God bangs the Earth. “I'll say! Them are some mighty fine genes that boy has,” Applejack said with amazement. “Ok I can easily say this guy can beat me any day of the week.” gulped out Rainbow Dash. she might be prideful but even she knows when to pick her battles. Wiz: While Thor is not invulnerable, he is augmented by his godly status and a fraction of the all-powerful Odin Force sealed within Mjolnir, his enchanted hammer. “Fascinating!”said Twilight as she took dawn notes on Mjolnir in her notebook mutch to the amusement of her former teacher. Superhuman Abilities: Super Strength Supersonic Speeds Self Sustenance Inexhaustible Stamina Nigh-Invulnerability Super Breath Immunity to Ailments Boomstick: That's his weapon??? That thing is way too tiny! I mean, if he was the god of mending fences or something I guess I could say - "The thing still looks like it could do some damage," said Rarity. not understanding why Boomstick was making fun of Thor's hammer. Thor smashes the Rainbow Bridge with Mjolnir causing a great explosion. “WHOA!!!” most of the group yelled as the sound from the explosion was blasting through the speakers, nearly knocking them back from the volume. The only one who wasn’t blown back was Celestia who just stared with a small smile and a look of nostalgia in her eyes. Boomstick: WHOA! Oh shit! Never mind! (*Cues: Thor(2011) - Prologue*) Wiz: Mjolnir is mystically bound to Thor, and obeys him as if it were alive. And if it were any larger, it would be too heavy to wield. “Learning a lot Twilight?” asked Celestia with a mirthful smile, all she got was a quick nod from the young alicorn who was too focused on writing down what she was seeing. This caused Celestia to let out an amused smile as she patted Twilight’s mane. Boomstick: So it's not the size of the hammer, it's how he uses it! “Darn it boomstick! you couldn't help yourself could you?” ranted Rarity. But a winged hug from the sun princess help calmed her down. Wiz: It was forged by dwarves using the core of a dying star, which went supernova and killed all the dinosaurs. “That's so super duper extra cool!” Pinkie Pie cheered. “Heck ya it is!” agreed Rainbow dash. Boomstick: Yeah. Forget anything that I said earlier. I'm liking the dino-slaughtering hammer. Where can I get one? “Ya where!?” asked Rainbow Dash, Pinkie Pie, and surprisingly Twilight as well and with a look of child like glee. Wiz: Mjolnir can only be wielded by Thor. Boomstick/the three mares : Aww. Wiz: Although there is a work-around. Red Hulk once carried the hammer into space because Thor was still holding onto it, which may be one of the dumbest technicalities ever. “That’s an odd loophole.” commented Rarity thinking a weapon should be heavy to an enemy even if the wielder was still holding it. Mjolnir: Bound to Thor Literally means 'Crusher' Forged from a Starcore Momentum Based Flight Unbreakable Anti-Force Energy Blasts God Blast (Summons his energy into a beam capable of slaying immortals) Boomstick: But Mjolnir is not the only thing in Thor's arsenal. He wears the Belt of Strength which -surprise! - doubles his already powerful might. “Ahhhh~ it’s always good to see accessory at work,” said Rarity “Wouldn't mind having that belt,” Applejack said as she eyed the belt on screen imagining that belt helping her make work at the farm a lot easier. Megingjord: Nordic Title: Megingjord Belt of Strength Doubles Thor's Physique Wiz: And naturally, as the god of thunder, Thor can manipulate the weather. Storms, tornadoes, the wind. He can even summon deadly bolts of lightning. “Oh my it’s like he’s a super Pegasus,” commented Fluttershy as she was starting to enjoy this fighter even though he was big and tough looking she couldn't help but feel calm when looking at him. “More like a pegasus god!” awed Rainbow Dash. Boomstick: He also has some control over the earth. He can make earthquakes that span entire continents. “And now add Earth pony god on that growing list of magic,” deadpanned Applejack. Godly Powers: Weather Manipulation Wind-Powered Flight Earthquake Control Immortality Warrior's Madness Berserk State Healing Powers Wiz: Thor has fought and defeated many of the most powerful warriors in the Marvel universe. He's mastered enough martial arts to box Captain America to a standstill, and even overpowered the Hulk. Although, in the past, he could lose his powers when separated from his hammer. “That’s an odd weakness?” commented fluttershy. Boomstick: Which is pretty stupid, considering his main method of attack is throwing the damn thing. “And that’s the worst thing to do,” deadpanned Spike. Wiz: But through some convoluted magic absurdity, this is no longer a problem. In fact, he has no specific physical weaknesses, though he suffers from a superiority complex. Arrogant and eager to fight, he often ignores even the most perceptible risks. most of the group stayed silent as they all turn their attention towards Rainbow dash. “... welp i guess Dash is a demi-god,” joked Applejack electing a few laughs from the group except said blue mare who was glaring at them. “Oh buck the lot of you!” yelled the annoyed speedster. “Naw you should save that for sonic,” joked Pinkie. Getting even more laughter from the group. Feats: Master Marksman Top Flight Speed: Mach 32 Martial Arts Mastery (Viking, Celtic, Saxon, German, & American fighting styles) Overpowered the Hulk Can Destroy Adamantium Escaped a Black Hole Strongest Asgardian, aside Odin, lifted the Midgard Serpent Boomstick: I like him! Thor hits a Frost Giant with Mjolnir, knocking him into an icy wall. Thor: Next? “So coool~!” everyone said. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ The group agreed that thor was a powerhouse and if he could control his arrogance he could win. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Raiden (*Cues: Parotoe - Mortal Kombat Theme (Metal)*) Wiz: According to Japanese legend, Raiden is the god of thunder and storms who, when angered, devours the stomachs of children as they sleep. “WHAT!?” screamed the girls as they all turn green in the face at the thought of a monster that eats children's guts. Boomstick: Mmm, child haggis. Just like Mom used to make. Well, whenever he's had his fill of defenseless, sleeping children, I guess he decided to protect the Earth from evil. “Why would his mom make haggis out of kids?” whispered out Fluttershy. But not getting answer from her friends who were still stunned at the last part. Wiz: Raiden is the defender of Earthrealm, and a key leader into shielding it from the forces of Shao Kahn's Outworld. “Who’s this Shao Kahn we keep hearing about?” asked Rainbow Dash. they heard about him from Akuma vs shang battle and now here. “Meh no one to worry about until season 2.” said Pinkie Pie. getting a few confused looks from her friends. Background Full Name: Lord Raiden Height: 7' Weight: 350 Lbs. Age: Eternal Protector of Earthrealm Martial arts mastery Jujitsu, Nan Chuan, Judo, & Taekwondo Boomstick: He's a master of several fighting styles, and amps them up with powerful electric attacks. He sometimes wields a wooden staff, but generally prefers his fists. “All ways good to have a weapon as a backup,” commented Spike. Wiz: From the mobile kicks of Tae Kwon Do, to the anti-armor combat of jujitsu, Raiden's wide variety of fighting styles complement each other perfectly to take down any kind of opponent. “Always have a plan for any situation,” said Celestia. Writing that one down,” said an excited Twilight as she was happy to see even a shred of her old mentor teaching again. Boomstick: This thunder god used several lightning-charged special attacks, like the Vicinity Blast, Electric Fly, and the Shocking Touch. Not to mention, when finishing his foes, he discharges so much electricity into them that they combust. The sheer power of these lightning attacks apparently overload his brain, causing him to spout out random gibberish in mid-attack. Special Moves Lightning Shots Vicinity Blast Shocking Touch Electric Fly Electric Slide Teleport Fatalities Raiden uses his Electric Fly on Jax. That got the group laughing at that random scene. (*Cues: Mortal Kombat - Eternal Life (Metal)*) Wiz: As an eternal god, Raiden is entirely composed of ethereal energy, and can morph into various forms of electrical force. With this trait he gains teleportation, flight and unlimited endurance. The girls found those skills to pretty neat. Boomstick: And like any other thunder god, Raiden has all sorts of control over the weather and lightning. “So same power as thor?” Rarity asked “Though he seems to be lacking in the whole Earth shaking powers” commented Applejack. Wiz: Raiden has so much power he can even achieve scientifically impossible things, like channeling electricity through insulated wood. Boomstick: Haha, take that physics! “No! Not physics!” cried out the purple alicorn. Wiz: He is one of the most powerful characters in the Mortal Kombat universe, and has successfully defended Earth for centuries. He eventually became the all-powerful Elder God of Earthrealm, but relinquished this power in order to protect the people of Earth. “He did what?” the group asked. Godly Powers Ethereal energy composition Weather manipulation Electricity manipulation Flight Healing powers Immortality Eventually reincarnated after death Boomstick: Wait, what? That doesn't make any sense. “He’s right! Why would raiden do that?” asked a confused twilight. Wiz: While he is an immortal, formless god, he is not indestructible and has limits. In order to fight among others, he must take a form susceptible to mortality. So he tosses his immortality aside to protect the people of earthrealm.” said Celestia with good amount of respect in her voice. Boomstick: But he still retains all of his godly powers and is tough enough to effortlessly smash through solid concrete. “Dang!” gasped out Applejack. Wiz: Through his numerous success in defending Earth against impossible odds, Raiden has proved his greatest attribute to be his leadership and wisdom in battle. He is a cunning and daring strategist, willing to make whatever sacrifices is necessary to achieve victory. “Lives aren't just pawn in a game of chess,” said Fluttershy as she gave the screen a weak glare. Feats Most powerful Mortal Kombatant Held off limitless-power Kano Has mastered 750 varieties of Jujitsu Was the last man standing against the Deadly Alliance Defeated the Houan necromancers Can channel electricity through wood Went toe-to-toe with Superman Effortlessly lifted a Plane Boomstick: Like this guy! That guy! And all of these guys! Raiden: a physical example of sacrificing others for the greater good. “It’s not the greater good if innocent lives are the cost,” countered Twilight said with narrowed eyes. Raiden: Hehehe...sorry. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Wiz: Alright, the combatants are set. Let's end this debate once and for all Boomstick: It's time for a Death Battle! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Team Thor: Celestia, Rainbow Dash, Rarity, Applejack, Pinkie Pie. Team Raiden: Twilight, Spike. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Death Battle Thor stands in an empty field. Then Raiden appears in a shower of electricity. Both take fighting poses. FIGHT! (*Cues: Liquid Tension Experiment - Acid Rain*) Raiden shoots two bolts of electricity as he moves away. Thor effortlessly blocks them, then throws Mjolnir. Raiden disappears and Thor's weapon comes back to its owner. Raiden then appears behind Thor and unleashes a combo, then uppercuts Thor in the air where he continues his assault. Raiden then teleports and attacks from multiple angles, managing to stay ahead of his opponent, before throwing Thor to the ground and knocking him away with Vicinity Blast. Thor hits the ground, then stands back up. “Thor looks like he’s not even hurt,” said an awed Fluttershy. Thor: Have at thee! Thor uses Mjolnir to summon lightning. Thor: Mighty Spark! He fires a blast of lightning at Raiden, but he manipulates it for his own, and rebounds it. Thor then stops it with Mjolnir and jumps toward a tree, uprooting it, then punches it. It flies toward Raiden, who disintegrates it with a blast of electricity. Thor then slams the ground, summoning an earthquake, which causes Raiden to stumble. Afterward, Raiden jumps, then flies away. Thor accepts it as a challenge, and flies toward him. They rush at each other, and collide, summoning a massive discharge of electricity, but it turns out that Thor has kicked Raiden with both of his feet. Raiden then flies back-first into a mountain wall, but gets back up and starts running. "I'm surprise that Raiden could get up after that," commented Rainbow Dash. Amazed at the durability the the older looking god had. "I could only do that when I had all of the Alicorn magic in Equestria and even then I couldn't just get up like it was nothing," gawked Twilight. Thor throws Mjolnir again, but Raiden teleports away, causing Mjolnir to hit the mountain before returning. Raiden resumes running, then, knowing Thor is coming right towards him, turns around and fires two electric bolts while jumps. Thor knocks both aside and then kicks Raiden into the air, followed by a powerful blow with his knee. Raiden flies downward, first hitting a rock formation with his back, then lands to the ground. But Thor suddenly lands to the ground, causing Raiden to stumble. Thor then grabs onto Raiden, headbutts him, then slams him to the ground. “He’s making sure Raiden can’t get away and have time to think,” Stated Celestia as she had her eyes focus on every detail. "It's a brutal but efficient strategy," added in Twilight. (*Cues: Frost Giant Battle - Thor (2011)*) He jumps back into a safe distance and summons a tornado. Raiden disappears, and reappears inside the tornado. He fires a barrage of bolts, which catch Thor off-guard, who is unable to block them all. Raiden then uses a huge discharge of electricity, stunning Thor. Raiden teleports to Thor, who is still stunned, but as Thor recovers and is about to attack, Raiden uppercuts him far into the air. Raiden follows Thor and the two clash with a flurry of blows, ending with Raiden grabbing Thor and unleashing his Shocking Touch... which has no effect on Thor. “At this moment Raiden new… he done bucked up,” Pinkie Pie said with a very soothing voice that could lull a dragon to sleep. Thor: Away with you! He slams Raiden downward, who falls to the ground. Everyone had to wince at least a little at the brutal slam. Thor: Feel Heaven's wrath! He summons a massive electric blast to fire at Raiden. Raiden sees it coming, and in the aftermath, has absorbed all of its electrical power. Raiden then flies upward with Electric Fly, but Thor swings Mjolnir below Raiden's stomach, destroying his lower body. Thor grabs takes Raiden above the clouds and throws him upward. “Whoa!” yelled Applejack at the brutal scene. “Finnish him!” yelled Pinkie Pie with a crazed look in her eyes. Thor: Farewell! The thrown Raiden leaves the earth and flies through space until reaching the Sun. Raiden then melts away, causing a tiny shockwave on the Sun's surface. Most of the group could only stare at the godly display of strength with everyone almost lost for words. “Fatality!” laughed Pinkie. K.O! Results (*Cues: Thor (2011) - Yggdrasil*) Boomstick: That seemed a bit overkill. I liked it! “And it was awesome!” yelled Rainbow Dash. Wiz: Raiden is a clever and versatile combatant, but was completely overpowered by Thor's strength. “Even i can admit that sometimes brawn can beat brains,” Twilight said. Boomstick: It also doesn't help that Raiden's main weapon, electricity, was completely useless. Add in Thor's hammer and game over. “It’s like throwing fireballs at a dragon,” Spike commented. Wiz: Remember, Mjolnir was forged using the core of a dying star. When a star dies, it collapses into a super condensed neutron star. Even the smallest portion of this star can weigh 1,000,000 tons. Raiden stood little chance against a blow like that. “No arguments here,” everyone said. Boomstick: Well, at least Raiden finally found his place in the sun. (cue facehoof) Wiz: The winner is Thor. END! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ After the battle, everyone gathered around the glowing box. “C’mon box. Let’s see some good stuff today,” Rainbow said, hovering in the air. “Aw, didn’t you like what we got yesterday?” Pinkie asked innocently causing the others to giggle. “What, no, I just want to see what we get today,” Rainbow said quickly. “Settle down girls. The box stopped glowing,” Celestia said, pointing out the now not glowing box. Twilight nodded and open the box to reveal more comics and a couple of hats for everyone. “Sweet,” Rainbow said, grabbing a few comics and a hat of Thor. “I wonder if this could go with that one outfit I’m working on,” Rarity said, picking up one of Raiden’s hats. She was trying to see if it could go with the dress that Chun Li inspired her. As everyone took a few things, Celestia cleared her throat and said, “Goodbye everyone.I will say I had fun and can’t wait for the next time.” She then teleported back to her room and walked over to her vanity mirror. Celestia channeled her magic from her horn into the mirror itself as it started to warp until the image of a man appeared. “Ah Celestia, it’s been awhile,” A blonde haired man said from the mirror “That it has and you wouldn’t believe what I just saw,” Celestia said smiling. “Oh?” “I saw you and and elder god fight on this show,” Celestia said matter factly. “Hopefully they got my good side,” the blonde showing off his pearly white teeth with a smile. “You always ask that, Thor,” Celestia said, rolling her eyes. “And I was able to use it to swoon you, my dear,” Thor, the blonde, said while laughing heartily. “Yes, that was back when you had good pick up lines,” Celestia said giggling to herself. “You wound me my dear.” The blond god of thunder said with a fake look of pain, getting a few laughs from the two but soon a serious look crossed his face . “I must ask how is SHE doing?” Thor asked in a concerned voice. Celestia had a sad smile on her face and said, “I haven’t seen her for so long. My student has told me that she’s been making friends and enjoying her life for the most part. I just wonder what she’s doing right now.” “She’s probably having fun with her friends like she should be,” Thor said while laughing. “I’m sure she’s also causing her own brand of trouble two,” said the white mare with a small smirk. “HAHAHA! No doubt! She does take after us after all!” laughed the Asgardian. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ at the human world~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ In a small family owned bakery on another world, a group of friends sat at a table while drinking their coffees. All except for one person. Looking at her drink, a red and yellow haired girl asked, “What’s this?” One of her friends, a bushy pink haired girl, said, “Why that’s a triple chocolate cappuccino, Sunset. Just try it.” The girl, now named Sunset, grabbed the cup and inspected it. After taking a long sniff, she brought the cup to her lips and downed the hot beverage in one gulp which impressed her friends. “Well?” the pink haired girl asked. Sunset just sits there for a moment before throwing her cup onto the floor causing it to shatter. “I’ll have another!!” Sunset said loudly. The rest of her friends and the owners of the bakery could only sigh as Sunset did this with every new thing she tried. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Chapter end! Next time Cloud vs Link.
Link VS Cloud.“So you haven’t found Starlight yet?” Twilight asked her brother. After hearing it from her brother, she slumped against couch and was feeling even more worried than before. Shining, who was sitting on the couch with Twilight, shook his head and said, “We had the guards looking at the crash site and had them cover a two mile radius from the site. All they found were some hoof prints leaving the site.” “So there’s a chance she didn’t…,” Twilight said, not wanting to finish the thought. Shining scooted over and gave Twilight a hug, calming her down a bit. “Hey, I’m sure Starlight’s okay. She’s smart and from what Spike told me, can hold her own against you. So don’t worry,” Shining said, comforting his sister. “I just miss her, BBBFF,” Twilight said, hugging her brother a little tighter. ~~~~~~~~~~ where in the world is Starlight Glimmer? ~~~~~~~~~~ We find Starlight sleeping near a campfire that she had setted up after her fight with the undead warriors of nightmare moon. The young mare slept restlessly from the cold and wounds dealt to her from some of the creature getting too close to her. As the young mare slept a figure slowly rose from the flames of her camp fire revealing itself to be the chaos god Deadman who then made his way towards her, only stopping when he was standing over her. As he stared down at the battered mare who was breathing heavily the chaos being simply tilted his head and a sound like breaking glass could be heard in the far distance. Starlight soon started to breathe more calmly in her sleep and her wounds started to vanish as if they never happened and then a blanket appeared on her causing the young mare to smile in her sleep. Seeing his work done Deadman vanished from the camp leaving the sleeping mare unaware of her meeting with a chaos god. (the void) As deadman appeared back into the black void of space he was met with the blank stare of trepp. “That was unnaturally nice of you.” stated the board god as he gave his fiery friend a curious look. The mad god could only shrug. “I might be a Trickster but I’m not a sadist.” he stated as the two turn their attention back to the main group of interest. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ “I’m sure she’ll be back before you know it. So dry those tears,” Shining said, nudging his sister slightly. Twilight giggled and nudged him back. “We interrupting something,” a southern voice asked. Shining and Twilight looked towards the door to see Applejack and the others standing there, looking at the two curiously. “No, we were just having a sibling talk,” Twilight said, feeling a bit better, “Anyways, you girls ready for the next episode?” “You betcha Twilight,” Pinkie said, bouncing towards the couch. Once she sat down, she put her hooves into her mane and pulled out a box of donuts. Opening the box she said, “Want one?” Everyone declined as Spike came waddling in with a bowl of jewels and a couple of other snacks. “You didn’t start it, right?” Spike asked, taking a seat in a bean bag chair. “We were just about to start,” Twilight said, pressing the play button. Interlude (*Cues: Invader-Jim Johnston*) Boomstick: They're two of the most iconic swordsmen in video game history, known for taking on things way out of their league. Wiz: Link, the champion of Hyrule... "wow only great knights are given the title champion," Shining said. impressed with the young looking worrier. Boomstick: And Cloud Strife, guardian of the lifestream... and orphans. "That's great," Said Fluttershy as she looked at the spikey haired swordsman with admiration. Wiz: Since both combatants use vast player-customizable arsenals, in this scenario they will wield what they are most comfortable taking into battle. Boomstick: They use the weapons they choose to bring into their fighting games. However since standard skills, weapon traits and armor aren't specified in Dissidia and Smash, we're taking those from their whole story. Wiz: And remember in Death Battle, there is no outside help allowed. Boomstick: Aww, but Boomstick, they have summons and they're cool, and fairies, and their– SHUT UP! This is our show, and this is the the way we do it! Wiz: I'm Wizard and he's Boomstick, and it's our job to analyze their weapons, armor, and skills to find out who would win a Death Battle. Link (*Cues: Soul Calibur II - Link's Theme*) Wiz: Link is the multi-incarnated hero of the Hyrule Kingdom. Humble and brave, he has defeated the forces of evil for ten generations. Boomstick: Each fairy hero is linked... Haha! ...to each other. "HA I get it!" laughed Pinkie Pie. Wiz: No, Boomstick, he's not a fairy. Boomstick: Pointy ears, tights, magic, and look at that hair! Fairy! "I don't get it," Fluttershy muttered confused. Wiz: Each incarnation of Link bears the Spirit of the Hero, bestowing the unbreakable will and combat prowess of each previous owner. Background Age: Around 17 Height: 5'7" Bears the Spirit of the Hero Left-Handed Multi Incarnate Humble & Brave Skilled in Boxing & Sumo Wrestling Boomstick: And he's got over ten links of learning to work with, he's an expert with tons of weapons and magic, especially his iconic Master Sword. When the group saw the blade in question they were for a lost of words when they laid eye’s on the Masterpiece of a weapon. It was a double-edged arming sword with a narrow ricasso and a wide, shallow fuller that runs almost the entire length of the blade The symbol, which are three triangles that form together, is seen engraved in the lower part of the blade and a yellow gemstone embedded in the blue crossguard which resemble outstretched wings wings. “It’s… beautiful,” whispered Twilight as she stared at the blade. “If i had a blade like that then Sombra and Chrysalis would've never been a problem,” said Shining armor as he imagine how the sword would of made them into mince meat. “Oh my~ that blade needs to be put on a pedestal so the world can see it!” gushed Rarity as she loved the elegance of the sword. Wiz: This double-edged blade was forged by the goddess Hylia to slay powerful demons. It repels evil and deflects light-based magic. “So it can defend against light and darkness.” Spike said amazed that there was such a diverse weapon. “I gotta admit it’s pretty cool.” said Rainbow Dash. Boomstick: And when Link's in top shape, he can shoot beam thingies out of it. Why this changes when he takes a hit, I don't understand, but hey, LASERS! “Maybe he needs to be at full health to handle it?” suggested Fluttershy. “That or the creatures were worried it would break the game if they didn’t put that drawback in,” commented Pinkie Pie. Wiz: When low on energy, the Master Sword can still launch the Skyward Strike by calling on help from above. In addition, it utilizes three magical medallions. Master Sword aka Goddess Sword Crafted by the Goddess Hylia Repels evil Indestructible Sword Beam/Skyward Strike Deflects light energy magic Medallions Bombos - Launches fire Ether - Freezes foes Quake - Makes earthquakes (*Cues: The Legend of Zelda: A Link Between Worlds - Hyrule Castle*) Wiz: However, the Master Sword is far from Link's only weapon. The group leaned in to hear more about the green clad worrier’s arsenal. Boomstick: He's got some deep pockets. He somehow carries around a boomerang and tons of bombs, along with a hookshot which helps him zip line his way around and brings things to him. Man, that really would've helped to get that last beer all those times on the couch. Probably still be married. Rarity could only shake her head at Boomstick’s comment while Pinkie was bouncing around and talking about all the cool bomb’s Link had. “I wouldn't mind having something like the hookshot,” mumbled Spike imagining having something like that to get around and make up for his lack of wings. Weaponry Boomerang (Attacks up to 5 times; always returns) Bombs (5 second fuse; Water Bombs; Bombchus) Hero's Bow (Fire Arrows; Ice Arrows; Light Arrows; Silver Arrows) Hookshot/Clawshot Wiz: Doubt it. Link is an excellent archer, and uses the Hero's Bow in conjunction with several arrow types. However, much of Link's arsenal is more suited to exploration than combat. “True but it still gives him a good set of equipment that can help him in different situations,” said Applejack, liking the fighter more she heard about him. “Well said Applejack,” complemented Shining armor getting a nod of thanks from the farm mare. Boomstick: Which is why he hides behind several layers of defense, like the Red Ring, which reduces injury by 75%. “Now that’s something i wouldn't mind having,” said Fluttershy as she imagined not having to worry about getting hurt as easily. Wiz: The Golden Gauntlets brace his arms against intense pressure, though do not increase striking power. He also carries three different pairs of boots. Boomstick: Three, huh? Told you he's a fairy. Everyone chuckled at that. Wiz: The Iron Boots weigh 130 pounds, the Hover Boots float in midair, and the Pegasus Boots with attached Roc's Feather increases Link's speed and agility to superhuman levels. “Awww ya! Of course the best boots are called the Pegasus Boots!” bragged Rainbow Dash. getting some eye rolls from her friends. “Though i have to wonder who made thouse boot’s” wondered Twilight. Boomstick: But his best defense is the Hylian Shield. Yet again the group were impressed with the craftsmanship that was put in when making this shield. (*Cues: The Legend of Zelda: Skyward Sword - Staff Roll*) Wiz: Originally forged from the Thunder Dragon Lanayru, the Hylian Shield is completely indestructible. “It was made by a Dragon!?” gasped out spike as he started liking the shield more and more. “Not only that but made by a Thunder Dragon!” added in Twilight with a voice filled to the brim with amazement. “Why’s that amazing twi?” asked Rainbow Dash as the rest of the group wondered as well. “Thunder Dragons are a rare and strong sub species of dragons that breath out lighting instead of fire and are immune to fire and Lighting but are very secluded and live far away from other species, even other dragons.” lectured Twilight. Armor Red Ring (Defense +75%) Chain Mail Shirt (Riveted) Golden Gauntlets (Bracers can withstand over 1000 tons) Boots (Iron Boots; Hover Boots; Pegasus Boots & Roc's Feather) Hylian Shield Bomstick: Link also has a little help from the goddesses, via the Triforce of Courage. This tiny golden triangle embodies his ability to beat overwhelming odds. “Such a small symbol is the source of his power?,” Rarity commented. Wiz: He is a puzzle solver, analyzing and exploiting his opponent's' weaknesses even when there is only one possible means of winning. But while Link has the necessary tools to take on any opponent, his over-reliance of inventory over pure skill leaves him vulnerable. “So take away his equipment and he’s pretty much helpless,” said Applejack. “Seems like a very severe weakness,” commented Spike Boomstick: Still, anyone who can fight a guy three times his size, while wielding a sword twice as large as he is, is a badass in my book. With so many weapons and skills, there are few who can stand a chance against the Hero of Hyrule. Plus, if he dies, we can always just clap and bring him back to life. Feats Bears the Triforce of Courage Puzzle Solver Has Single-Handedly beaten Armies Fought a huge variety of foes Z-Targeting=Very Fast Reactions Strong enough to throw armored Gorons Wiz: HE'S NOT A FAIRY! “Hahahahahaha!” laughed Rainbow Dash and Pinkie. Link pulls the Master Sword out of the pedestal. Cloud Strife (*Cues: Final Fantasy VII - Mako Reactor*) Wiz: Cloud Strife, guardian of the Lifestream, is no ordinary swordsman. “What is the life stream?” Twilight asked. “Sounds beautiful” said Fluttershy. Boomstick: There's no way around it. He's a fucking super soldier, but damn, he's in desperate need of a haircut. “It is quite odd looking,” commented Rarity as she stared at the golden spiky mess of hair on top of Cloud’s head. Wiz: Impulsive and moody, Cloud strove to join the illustrious Shinra organization. Instead, he was forcefully exposed to Mako poisoning, a raw energy drained from the planet itself. Background Age: 24 Height: 5'7" Superhuman Strength & Speed Retains Zack's Memories & Skills First Class Soldier Training Impulsive & Moody Inferiority Complex “His group betrayed him?” Fluttershy gasped. Horrified that somepony was used by his own group. Boomstick: And somehow it gave him all the memories of his dead buddy, Zack, including his First Class soldier training. Thanks, convenient planet poison. The group was sadden to hear that not only did the organization that he work hard to join betray and use him, but he also lost his best friend. No powers and skills will ever be able to make up for what he lost. Wiz: That's not all Cloud inherited from his friend. His main weapon is Zack's Buster Sword, a colossal single-edged blade. With his strength, Cloud can swing this much faster than any normal human. The group’s jaws fell to the floor when they laid their eye’s on what was a monster of a blade that was six feet long, with a single-edged large blade approximately two foot wide, with The handguard colored gold and has swirl designs, the part of the blade bearing the two holes is raised slightly and sectioned off from the rest of the blade, and there are etchings engraved on the blade near the handguard. “So AWESOME!” scream Rainbow Dash as she imagined fighting monsters with it. “Might want to tear your eyes away from that sword or your boyfriend might get jealous,” mocked Applejack but the only response she got from the blue mare was her taking a notebook out of her saddle bag and start writing down in it. “Um darling what are you writing?” asked Rarity but before she could get a response from the blue mare they were interrupted by boomstick. Boomstick: Holy shit! Look at it! That's a man's sword right there! “Totally agree Boomstick!” yelled Dash as she completely dodge the question. “darn it.” Rarity said as she realised Rainbow Dash just outwitted her. Buster Sword Length: 6' Width: 2' Base Power: 19 Base Accuracy: 96% 2 Linked Martial Slots Single-Edged Broadsword Passed Down between Angeal, Zack, & Cloud Wiz: The Buster Sword contains two slots for materia, condensed Mako that grants magical abilities. However, since their creation damages the planet, Cloud has limited his materia use. “Sad that he’s limit on his arsenal but i can respect somepony who protects his planet like that,” said a impressed Applejack. Boomstick: He typically carries the Firaga materia, which shoots fire at things. And in the second slot, we're giving Cloud his most iconic materia, Thundaga. This materia can shoot electricity and summon lightning bolts. “Fascinating!” said Twilight with a childlike glee as if she was a foul that just saw a new toy. Materia Fire/Firaga Level (Fire, Fira, & Firaga attacks; Projectile Based Pyrokinesis; Use Slightly decreases Strength) Lightning Bolt/Thundaga Level (Thunder, Thundara, & Thundaga attacks; can summon lightning from the sky; can launch bolts of electric magic; use slightly decreases strength) (*Cues: Final Fantasy VII - Bombing Mission*) Wiz: Cloud has an encyclopedia worth of anger issues, which actually works to his advantage. He can channel his rage into extremely powerful Limit Break attacks. “I think this is the first time that anger can actually be a good thing,” Spike said as he remembered where anger was the last thing that was needed. Boomstick: These emo-charged Limit Breaks range from paralyzing foes with Cross Slash to launching meteors from his sword. But his deadliest move is the Omnislash, a move so quick and powerful, it practically guarantees victory. The group was stunned when they saw Cloud zoom towards his enemy and unleash a barrage of slashes before finishing off with a powerful downward slash. “Whoa…” everyone said. Wiz: As he doesn't carry any other materia, Cloud obviously wears Ziedrich armor. While this magical band has zero materia slots, it grants the wearer an extraordinary amount of defense, and halves damage received from elemental, magical and physical effects. “Now that’s some mighty fine armor! Applejack said. Impressed with what it could do. “Again some armor i wish my men had.” lamented Shining armor. Boomstick: Also, Cloud wears a ribbon, which makes him immune to all status effects like burns and stuns. Well, I guess that makes it worth wearing a freakin' chick accessory. “I actually find the ribbon quit fetching!” Rarity countered. Armor Ziedrich (Defensive Stregth: 100%; Magic Defensive Strength: 98%; 20% power increase; halves damages; 0 materia slots) Metal Pauldron Ribbon (grants immunity to status ailments including burn, ice, poison, etc.) (*Cues: Unknown Theme*) Wiz: Cloud is brash and aggressive, but not the brightest fighter. He often relies on overpowering opponents through sheer ferocity and brute strength. “My kind of guy- and shut the buck guys!” Rainbow shouted before anyone could say a word. Boomstick: Like a badass! You don't need to think too hard when you're strong enough to cut through freakin' skyscrapers. Cloud's single handedly taken down quite a few powerhouses, like the giant Bahamut SIN, and planet-busting Sephiroth. He's even been completely impaled and shrugged it off like it was nothing. Multiple times! I mean, look at this shit! Feats Defeated Sephiroth/Jenova 3 times Killed Bahamut SIN Works Best as Point Man in a Team Focuses on Overpowering Foes Has Survived Several Longfalls Shrugged of Impalement Multiple times The group gawk at the amount of punishment that Cloud was able to shrug off like it was nothing and get right back into the fight. Wiz: It's impossible to deny, Cloud's superhuman abilities make him one of the deadliest swordsmen in video game history. Boomstick: Even if he looks like a girl. Cloud cries over Zack's death. That got the group quit teary eyed at the seen and Even fluttershy was hugging her doom guy Plushie even tighter trying not to cry. Wiz: Alright, the combatants are set. Let's end this debate once and for all. Boomstick: It's time for a Death Battle! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ On team Link: Twilight, Spike, Rarity, Applejack. And on team Cloud: Rainbow Dash, Pinkie Pie, Fluttershy. And shining decided to be neutral on this one. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Death Battle (*Cues: Those Who Fight/Fighting (Metal) - Final Fantasy VII*) Link and Cloud face each other, swords drawn in a large Screwattack arena. “Whoa!!! 3D graphics!” screamed Pinkie, as the rest of the group where just as surprised at the new look. FIGHT! Cloud charges at Link and tries to swing his Buster Sword, but Link blocks with his Master Sword. Cloud is sent backwards, while Link is sent into the air. While in the air, Link fires two Sword Beams at Cloud, who deflects them. Cloud then jumps into the air, performs a flip and smashes his Buster Sword into the ground, causing a shock wave to go straight at Link, who blocks the attack with his Hylian Shield, but gets launched back. Cloud charges at Link and they both swing at each other. Cloud uses Cross-Slash on Link who blocks with his Hylian Shield and on the last swing Link rolls under Cloud. “Wow this is getting intense!” awed Twilight as she saw the two blond swordsmen go blow for blow. “That shield is going to be tricky for cloud to get through though,” said Rainbow Dash as she watch said shield protect its wielder from harm. (*Cues: Powerglove - Power, Wisdom, Courage*) Link strikes Cloud with a Spin Attack, who is sent flying back. Cloud uses the Thundaga Materia and fires multiple shots at Link, who runs and blocks them with the Master Sword. Then Link jumps and performs another Spin Attack, deflecting the Materia. Cloud jumps into the air and fires a huge Thundaga at Link from above. Link uses his Master Sword to absorb the Thundaga and as Cloud lands, Link fires a Thundaga-fueled Skyward Strike at Cloud, who gets hit and is sent flying. “Now that's using your head their!” cheered Applejack getting cheers of agreement from the rest of team Link. “Grrr! Go get him cloud!” yelled Dash, as Pinkie waved a flag with Cloud’s name on it, (*Cues: Final Fantasy VII: Advent Childern - Tenrai - Divinity II*) As Cloud remains in the air, Link takes his Hero's Bow and fires arrows at Cloud, who deflects them with his Buster Sword. Cloud lands and charges at Link, who charges an Ice Arrow. Once Cloud is close enough, he fires it, freezing Cloud, but thanks to Cloud's Ribbon, he immediately thaws out. Cloud charges Link at swings, but Link dodges and throws a Boomerang, leaving him defenseless for a moment and allowing Cloud to deliver a series of sword strikes on him. Cloud then proceeds to use Climhazzard and Link attempts to counter with his Master Sword. Cloud eventually performs a mighty upswing, knocking the Master Sword out of Link's hands and forcing him to hide behind his Hylian Shield. Cloud delivers blow after blow on Link's Hylian Shield. (*Cues: The Legend of Zelda: Skyward Sword - Staff Roll*) Then the Boomerang from earlier comes back and hits Cloud, stunning him for a few seconds. Link uses his Hookshot and retrieves his Master Sword. Link then swings at Cloud, sending him flying. In the air, Cloud uses his Firaga Materia and fires a few shots at Link. Link puts on his Pegasus Boots, begins to increase his speed, and runs with his Hylian Shield outstretched. Dodging the Firaga, Link stops and runs up a pillar. Link launches himself at Cloud, striking him with another Spin Attack. Link lands on a platform above the ground, while Cloud lands on a small ring on a pillar. Cloud then uses Meteor rain, sending meteors at Link. “Run Link!” screamed team Link as most of team Cloud was cheering at clouds attack. (*Cues: Final Fantasy VII - Battle in the Forgotten City*) Cloud: Stars, rain down! “Oh my.” fluttershy blushed at clouds soft voice. Link uses his Hylian Shield and blocks every meteor. While Link is distracted blocking the meteors, Cloud charges and strikes Link with his Buster Sword, sending Link into the air. “GOOO! CLOUD!” Cheered Pinkie Pie while Waving around Pom-Poms. Cloud: This ends here! Cloud then performs his ultimate technique: the Omnislash Version 5, on Link, who manages to block the majority of the attack with his Hylian Shield. Once Cloud goes for the final strike, Link uses Z-Targeting to execute a well-placed sword swing, striking Cloud in the middle of the final blow and causing him to slam into the ground. “That was a move only master swordsmen can pull off,” said Shining in awe of the green clad swordsman's skill. (*Cues: Gerudo Valley - Legend of Zelda 25th Anniversary Symphony*) As Cloud falls to the ground on his knee, succumbing to his wound, Link throws a flurry of Bombs. The bombs explode, sending Cloud flying in the air, and with help from the Triforce, Link performs the Fatal Blow, piercing through Cloud. Link lands with his Master Sword buried into the ground as Cloud's lifeless body falls shortly after. Link then gets up and walks away. Team Link cheers as Clouds team sigh in defeat and Rainbow comforts a sadden Fluttershy who looked to be on the verge of tears. K.O.! Results (*Cues: The Legend of Zelda - Main Theme Orchestra*) Boomstick: Whoa! Chalk one up for the fairy guy; that was awesome! “Ya that was a good use of bombs,” admitted Pinkie Pie. still sadden that Cloud had lost. Wiz: In what might be the closest duel in Death Battle history, Link's combination of arsenal and strategy were just enough to defeat Cloud's brute force. “This time strategy was the most deadly weapon,” commented Twilight as she got a nod from her brother. Boomstick: Not to mention his items helped him match Cloud's superhuman abilities. Wiz: Cloud may be powerful, but Link's Golden Gauntlets were stronger. In Ocarina of Time, Link used them to lift – and throw – an enormous column of granite. As granite weighs 166 pounds per square foot, this means Link can withstand over a thousand tons of pressure, surviving any of Cloud's assaults. “Those gloves and shield were just too deadly of a combo to get through,” Applejack Stated. “Ya without those gloves Link's arm would of been torn or broken if he tried to block one of clouds attacks.” stated Shining Armor. Boomstick: Cloud should've had his mind on more than just the Master Sword. Wiz: The winner is Link. END! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Boomstick: next time on death battle! The group sees the camera slowly zoom back as they soon see a mark that looked like a spider. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ “That was so awesome. Did you see those moves?” Rainbow said, pointing at the TV. “Yeah Rainbow, we just saw it,” Applejack said, rolling her eyes. “Still it was exciting to see those two duke it out.” “The fight was great. Now let’s see what we got from the box,” Spike said, running over to the box. He stands by the box with an excited look on his face as the box began to glow. Spike opened the box just as the other got there and showed them what was inside. Everyone looked inside and saw a bunch of figures, a couple of orbs and a few bottles. “Sweet. I gotta have this,” Rainbow said, grabbing a figure of Cloud. “Same here,” Spike said, taking a figure of both Link and Cloud. He walked towards the couch as he was already playing with them. “Oh, there’s even a ribbon,” Rarity said, using her magic to grab the red ribbon. As she was looking it over, she said, “I’m gonna need to make a new ensemble for this.” “Only you would make a new dress for a ribbon,” Applejack said, rolling her eyes. Beside her, Fluttershy was trying one of the ribbons to her Doomguy plushie while humming a little song. “What’re these? ...They look like ….materia,” Twilight said amazed, levitating the rest of the orbs in front of her. Seeing the dangerous glint in her eyes, Applejack cleared her throat and said, “Now sugarcube, don’t do anything reckless.” “I’m only gonna study them and these bottles. Maybe we could use them without destroying our world,” Twilight said, grabbing the bottles and putting everything in a bag for later. “Guess I’ll take this. It looks like a pretty good replica,” Shining said, levitating a replica of the hylian shield. It looked like a very detailed replica and it was the only thing left in the box. “Anyways I should get going. I’ll see you next time Twilight, Spike, girls,” Shining said, waving goodbye to everyone. Later; at the crystal empire. Shining opened the door to his and Cadence’s room to see his wife and daughter on their bed. Walking towards them, Shining said, “I’m back.” Cadence turned around and said, “Shining, when did you get back?” “Just a little while ago and had a good time with Twiley,” Shining said, putting his saddle bags and shield down. Cadence saw the shield as Flurry Heart crawled towards the edge of the bed. “Did you get that from Twilight’s box?” Cadence asked, curious about the shield. Unaware to them, Flurry Heart started to breathe a bit heavily. “It’s just a prop from the fight today,” Shining said, holding it up as Flurry Heart just sneezed and fire a magic beam at him. Seeing the danger, Shining did the one thing he was trained to do at a time like this. He held the shield in front of him and closed his eyes, waiting for the beam to hit the shield. Standing there for a moment, Shining felt the force of the beam then opened his eyes to see Cadence with her mouth open as Flurry clapped her hooves and shot another beam at him. Shining held the shield but didn’t close his eyes as he watched the beam hit the shield and push him back a bit. The surprising thing was that the beam sputtered once it hit the shield and turn into a bunch of sparks. Looking up at his wife, Shining said, “I’m keeping this.” ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ CHAPTER END! NEXT TIME BATMAN VS SPIDER MAN!
Batman VS Spider-Man.It was the next day as Spike lead Rarity and everyone else to the viewing room. “You girls ready for the next episode?” Spike asked looking back at his friends. “I’m always ready,” Rainbow said, throwing punches in the air. “I just hope we see some more cool fights.” “While I don’t share Rainbow’s enthusiasm, I wouldn’t mind seeing more of the contestants. I could always use more ideas for my boutique,” Rarity said as she muttered the last part to herself. They were just about to enter the viewing room as Fluttershy was busy playing with her Doomguy Plushie. “Well, why don’t we start up the next ...episode?” Applejack said as they saw a strange sight before them. They stood in the doorway and saw Twilight sitting on the couch with ...Mare-do-well facing away from them? That was strange. Twilight saw her friends and said, “Hey Spike, girls. C’mon in.” “Uh, Twi. Who’s that?” Applejack asked, pointing at the masked pony on the couch. Said pony looked at Applejack with their head tilted to the side, confusing the farmer mare more than she was before. “Well I think it’s Pinkie Pie,” Twilight said, beckoning them over. Not sure of what’s going on, the ponies and dragon walked into the viewing room and took a seat on the couches. Applejack looked at Twilight and said, “Not to question you Twi, but you sure that’s Pinkie?” “She’s been here for a while and she did keep one of of those costumes,” Twilight said sounding sure of herself. The others shrugged as Twilight started the next episode. Interlude (*Cues: Invader - Jim Johnston*) Wiz: They're the guardians of the night. The superhero saviors of the lone and helpless. “Well that explains why Pinkie’s wearing the mare-do-well outfit,” said Applejack as she gave a side glance towards the disguised party mare. “...” said mare stayed silent as she kept her gaze towards the tv. Boomstick: Bruce Wayne, the Batman. “Why a bat?” Rarity asked, trying to hold back a shudder thinking about bats. “It will probably tell us during his segment,” stated Spike getting nods of agreement. Wiz: And Peter Parker, the Spider-Man. “(Groan) now spiders too?” whimpered Rarity, already thinking this episode was going to be horrible for her. “But Rarity spiders aren't really all that bad,” commented Fluttershy as she placed her Doomguy Plushie which was wearing a little cape and domino mask over it’s helmet, right next to her. Boomstick: It's no secret that given time for prep, both Batman and Spider-Man can defeat pretty much any opponent. That was an impressive claim that boomstick was boasting for the two fighters. Wiz: Which is why we're pitting them each other only with their standard equipment; gladiator style. Boomstick: He's Wiz and I'm Boomstick. Wiz: And it's our job to analyze their weapons, armor, and skills to find out who would win a Death Battle. Batman (*Cues: Batman (1989) - Main Theme*) Wiz: The Dark Knight is a master of the shadows, using intimidation as a weapon, he patrols the streets of Gotham City. Everyone except Pinkie Pie shuddered at the intimidating figure known as the Batman, even Rainbow Dash and Applejack felt like little fillies that just saw the boogeymare and poor fluttershy was hugging her Doomguy Plushie in fear. Boomstick: You know you're doin' something right when people are terrified at JUST your shadow. Pinkie Pie nodded her head as the rest of the group were busy being terrified of Batman’s shadow. Background Age: 41 Height: 6'2 Weight: 210 lbs Secret Identity: Bruce Wayne Net Worth: $6.9 billion Orphan 12 master's degrees Wiz: After his parents were murdered by the common thug, Bruce Wayne dedicated his life to fighting the criminal underworld. He achieved 12 master degrees, studied 127 martial arts, and perfected escape artistry. Given enough time, he can escaped any conceivable trap. The group had to hold back some tears when the saw the image of a young Bruce Wayne kneeling over his deceased parents. “How could something like that happen to a child?” Twilight asked. Wiping away her tears and hugging a teary eyed Spike. Even Pinkie who was still doing the silent act tipped her hat in respect and fluttershy was hugging her Plushie while tears traveled down her cheeks. The rest of the group stared down in sadness. “Well at least he’s fighting to keep others from going through what he did,” said Rainbow Dash. getting nods of agreement from everypony. Boomstick: Batman pushed himself to the limits of the human body: He can bench press 1,000 pounds and has great aim and reflexes. “My word! He truly has pushed himself to the limit,” gasped out Rarity. Skills Knows 127 martial arts Peak human conditioning Bench press: 1,000 lbs Leg press: 2,500 lbs Master acrobat and athlete Can survive in a vacuum for 27 seconds Genius intellect and strategist Master escape artist Ventriloquist Expert Detective “127 martial arts!” gasped out Rainbow Dash, extremely impressed. “And that strength.” marveled Applejack. (*Cues: The Dark Knight Trilogy - Main Theme*) Wiz: The Batsuit was designed to be the ultimate flexible, combat armor. The group marveled at the armor and how it had little to no weakness. “If only Shiny was here to see this.” said Twilight marveling at the fine suit. Boomstick: While the pointy ears are a bit much for me, the armor can stop knives and gunfire. “I like the ears though…” muttered Fluttershy muddered. Not understanding why Boomstick wouldn't want to look like a cute bat. Wiz: His memory cloth cape can be used as a glider and the entire suit is lined with a 200,000 volt electro network. “Sweet! He can glide too!” Spike said imagining having that cape and gliding around ponyville. “Wouldn't it be dangerous if his friends touch the suit and got zapped?” asked Applejack, not wanting to be on the receiving end of that shock. Boomstick: I guess when you're a billionaire, you can afford to turn yourself in a freakin' human taser. Batsuit Weight: 200 lbs Nomex reinforced fabric Fire-resistant memory cloth cape Bladed Gauntlets Steel-toed boots Nosepiece gas filter 200,000 volt electrode network Designed to evoke fear “Billionaire!?” yelled Rarity in shock. He was richer than all of her most well paying clients combined. Wiz: The gadgets from Wayne's never ending funds don't stop there. His utility belt carries DOZENS of different tools that can practically get him out of any situation. “There's more!?” cried a surprised Twilight. How much equipment does somepony need? “Yes more!” Rainbow Dash cheered. Wanting to see more gadgets that Batman had in his arsenal. Boomstick: That belt has pretty much EVERYTHING. Grappling hooks, explosives, beer. Maybe not that last one, but mine would. “Of course it would…” muttered Rarity with a blank stare. “Did he say grappling hook!?” Spike said excitedly. With Pinkie Pie showing a gleam of interest in her eyes. Wiz: Notable gadgets include a gasmask, tear gas, smoke pellets, a Kryptonite ring, remote detonated plastic explosives, and his trademark grapple gun. He also carries a large supply of collapsible shurikens. “Japony also have shurikens and from what I’ve looked up they can be extremely deadly,” lectured Twilight. “Maybe i should get some…” muttered Spike but a look sent his way from Twilight quickly told him that the answer is no. Boomstick: The batarangs! And if throwing razor sharp objects at people isn't enough, he's got several types! Like, the electric shock, knock out dart, and grenade. While everyone else was gawking at the different types of batarangs, Pinkie was keeping her focus on the Utility Belt and just stared at it with a gleam in her eye. Utility Belt Grapple gun Gas mask Tear gas Smoke pellets Bolas Tracers Transponder that summons bats Batarangs Wiz: Despite having the build of an olympic athlete, the caped crusader's greatest feat are attributed to his detective skills. He can anticipate attacks through muscle movement and can memorize the smallest detail, even the shape a cheek he's punched. And while Batman is only human, his achievement stand among gods. The group could only stare in admiration and feel inspired by batman’s feat’s. “So cool~.” Rainbow Dash said with nothing but admiration in her voice. Not missing a chance to crack a joke Applejack quickly said, “hope Sonic doesn't see ya goin all star struck at another guy,” she joked getting a few chuckles from the rest of the group except Rainbow Dash. The only response she got was for Rainbow Dash to take out her notebook again and start jotting something down and then putting it away. Confused Applejack was about to ask what that was all about but was interrupted by Boomstick. Boomstick: He's a founding member of the team of superheroes known as the Justice League. And he's even fought Superman! “He’s part of a superhero team!?” said an excited Spike. Thinking of his favorite Power Ponies comic. “Who’s this superman though?” asked Applejack, getting a shrug from the masked Pinkie Pie for an answer. “Maybe we’ll see him in death battle someday?” suggested Rarity, getting a few nods of agreement. Feats Solved numerous unsolvable crimes Invites near-death experiences Can best metahumans in combat Does not uses firearms Singlehandedly defeated Superman & the Justice League Only non-powered founder of the Justice League Wiz: But while Wayne has no exploitable weaknesses, he is not perfect. His mental stability has often been called into question. This got the group worried, wondering what was wrong with Batman’s mental health. Boomstick: Well, let's see. His parents were killed in front of him as a child, he uses his money to beat the shit out of people dressed as a giant bat, and keeps employing 12 year old sidekicks. Yeah, he's clearly not all there. “I can see their point on why everyone thinks he’s insane,” muttered Applejack. “Though the fact he channels it to fight for the innocent makes him an even greater hero.” Twilight said with everyone agreeing with her on that. Weaknesses No exploitable physical weaknesses Has to be rescued more than any other Justice League member Mental stability barely in check Wiz: But he IS a survivor. He endured being broken in half, fighting the other members of the Justice League, complete disintegration, and being stranded in the past as a living time bomb of galactic destruction. Boomstick/everyone: Wait, WHAT?! Even Pinkie Pie had to tilt her head in confusion. Wiz: Yet he somehow pulled through every time. Boomstick: Why? 'Cause he's the goddamn BATMAN. Thug: WHERE ARE YOU?! Batman: Here. Batman takes out the thug. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ After the first half was done the group quickly gushed how cool Batman was and agreed he truly did deserve to be called hero. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Spider-Man (*Cues: Spider-Man (2002) - Main Theme*) Wiz: The friendly neighborhood Spider-Man protects the streets of New York City. Boomstick: Once Peter Parker was a wimpy nerd with no friends. The group had to feel bad for Peter not having any friends. “I wonder why he doesn't have any friends he looks like a sweet young Stallion.” said Rarity, wondering why such a sweet boy couldn't make any friends. “He’s actually kind of cute,” Twilight whispered under her breath so nopony would hear her. Then he was bit by a radioactive spider that gave him weird bug powers, and now he's a radioactive superhero....with no friends. But after some practice and superheroing, he finally got himself laid. A lot, actually. Rarity was about to make a comment about Peter sleeping around until the Magic Box glowed for a sec and then shot a paper ball into a surprised Rarity’s hooves. “Hey it’s like that time with Shining and the whole Doomguy thing,” Rainbow Dash said getting surprised looks from the group as they all waited for Rarity to unscramble the paper and start to read. “So what does it say Rarity?” asked Fluttershy. After a few seconds Rarity stopped reading and neatly folded the piece of paper with a sadden look before releasing a sadden sigh. “It says that while Peter has had a lot of girl friends through the years, they never lasted for varying reasons, one of them being Peter’s enemies hurting him through the people he loved.” said Rarity with a single tear going down her face. The rest of the group was stunned silent but they soon bowed their heads in silence. Feeling sad for the spider themed hero and his tragic love life. Background Age: 25 Height: 5'10" Weight: 165 lbs. Secret Identity: Peter Parker I.Q.: 250 Orphan Science Major (*Cues: The Amazing Spider-Man Game - Main Theme*) Wiz: A clever photographer and science major, Spider-Man is not only incredibly powerful, but also a genius in strategy and science. Using these skills, he created two wrist mounted web shooters which let him swing around the city. “Wow sounds like Twilight’s dream guy,” teased Spike jokingly expecting Twilight to simply roll her eyes at the joke. He wasn’t expecting for her to turn beet red with a monster size blush. “Oh this is pure gold! First Dash and her crush on the blue hedgehog, and now you with your crush on Spider Man.” laughed Applejack along with the rest of the group much to the young alicorn’s charging. “Stop it!” yelled an embarrassed Princess as she covered her blushing face with her wings. Boomstick: You know, if he was SO smart, wouldn't he make the webs shoot out of his butt like a real spider? Wiz: NO, NO. First of all, it doesn't come out of their butt, it comes out of their- “Oh don’t you dare!” yelled Rarity. but it was too late as Boomstick did the worst. Possible. Thing! He sang! Boomstick: (to the tune of the Spider-Man song) ♪ Spider-Man! Spider-Man! Craps some webs like a spider can! ♪ “Dammit Boomstick!” screamed Rarity as the rest of the group laughed at the host’s terrible singing. (*Cues: Marvel vs. Capcom 3 - Spider-Man Theme*) Wiz: (rough) Each web shooter cartridge can hold a large amount of pressurized web fluid- Boomstick: AND SO CAN HIS GIRLFRIENDS! Haha! I'll be here all week. The group snickered at the joke while Rarity could only sigh in frustration, while Twilight and Fluttershy blushed at the joke. Wiz: (annoyed) .....and features a rotating carousel to replace the empty ones. “(cough) ok then! That’s… smart thing to do and keeps him from running out anytime soon in battle,” said Twilight as she fought down her blush. Web Shooters Twin Wrist-Mounted Carousel Loaded Webbing dissolves in 1 hour Web fluid cartridges pressurized at 300 psi Webbing is strong enough to restrain The Hulk Boomstick: His spider powers give him superhuman strength, speed, agility and durability. He can run up to 200 MPH, lift over 10 tons, and take a freakin' grenade to the FACE! The group were shocked at how strong Spider-man was and how much punishment he could take. Wiz: He can also knock out a dinosaur out cold with a single punch. “Awesome!” cheered Spike and Rainbow Dash while the others were impressed. Boomstick: Haha, suck it, Denver! Wiz: Also, by altering his body's electron attractions, Spider-Man can crawl along any surface. But his most advantageous power is the Spider-Sense. The group leaned in wondering what could be better then all of his other powers. Boomstick: It acts kinda like a warning signal, like caller ID when your ex-wife's calling for alimony. “I highly doubt it works like that…” muttered Rarity with a deadpanned tone. Wiz: Actually, the Spider-Sense is much more than a simple alarm. It gives Peter omnipresent detection to his surroundings. This is why he swings around New York without looking where he shoots his webs. And unlike his human senses, it is not affected by gases or toxins unless specifically tailored to the Spider-Sense itself. However, it's up to Spider-Man to recognize and react to his warning, so it can be tricked if he doesn't think he's in danger. “While it does have it’s fair share of weaknesses it’s still Peter’s most powerful ability,” Twilight said. (*Cues: The Amazing Spider-Man - Saving New York*) Boomstick: Still, combined with his speed, Spider-Man is almost untouchable. He can even dodge automatic fire. “Sweet!” said Rainbow Dash always liking it when speed is involved. Wiz: His unique martial art, The Way of the Spider, utilizes the Spider-Sense to its fullest. Spider-Man can go toe-to-toe with the most advanced masters of combat, even while blindfolded. “I have to admit Peter know’s what he’s got and knows how to use to it’s fullest.” complemented Applejack. Spider Powers Wall Crawling Superhuman Strength (Bench Press: 10 ton; Top Speed: 200 mph) Superhuman Speeds & Reflexes Superhuman Stamina & Durability Foreign Chemical Resistance Spider Sense Boomstick: No wonder other superheroes don't like this guy. I mean, the freaking Spider-Sense does everything for him! Now the group had to disagree on that one. Yes the spider sense was a huge advantage over others but Spider-Man still had to train to use it to it’s fullest potential. Feats Has defeated The Hulk Member of the Fantastic Four & the Avengers Developed unique ways of the spider martial art Has more girlfriends than any other superhero Destined teacher of Hope Summers, the Ultimate Mutant Wiz: Speaking of which, somehow, Spider-Man once tried to join the Justice League, but was rejected by Batman. “Ouch.” everyone hissed out. Must of hurt being denied to join a team of other superheroes. Boomstick: Ouch. I bet he wishes he can fight old Bats in a battle to the death - OH-HO, WAIT! “So it’s personal,” stated Fluttershy. Wiz: For all of his amazing powers, Spider-Man is not invincible. His bright and colorful costume makes stealth difficult, his durability has limits, and the oddly specific ethyl chloride pesticide is his Kryptonite. Also, any enemy with his speed comparable to his can outmatch his Spider-Sense. Weaknesses Durability has limits Spider Sense can be tricked of disruption by specialized drugs Arguably naive Anti-Spider Pesticide Ethyl Chloride “Those don’t seem that bad.” commented Spike Boomstick: Still, if those are only his limitations, how come he sometimes gets shot by a stray bullet? Wiz: Lazy, lazy writing. Mary Jane: Wait! Who are you? Spider-Man: You know who I am. Mary Jane: I do? Spider-Man: Your friendly neighborhood Spider-Man. END! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Wiz: Alright, the combatants are set. Let's end this debate once and for all. Boomstick: It's time for a Death Battle! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ On team Spider-Man: Twilight, Rainbow Dash, Spike. And on team Batman: Rarity, Fluttershy, Pinkie Pie, Applejack. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Death Battle (*Cues: Batman Returns - The Final Confrontation*) Spider-Man swings onto the rooftop of a building and waits. Batman then appears by jumping out of the shadows of the rooftop exit door. Spider-Man: You've got a black belt in stupid if you think you're gonna beat me. “Go get him Spidey!” cheered Rainbow Dash. FIGHT! Spider-Man shoots two webs, which Batman blocks immediately. Spider-Man shoots his webbing at Batman which pulls the caped crusader towards Spider-Man and hits Batman rapidly with multiple punches and kicks, but Batman knocks Spider-Man back with more powerful hits. Spider-Man bounces off the ground and lands on his feet, recovering instantly from Batman's furious attacks. “Batman is really letting him have it!” said Applejack in awe. “But Spider-man can take the hits,” countered Spike. Batman throws two batarangs, which was aimed at Spider-Man, one of which Spider-Man dodges and the other was simply threw away with Spider-Man's webs. Batman then throws an explosive batarang, striking the floor beneath Spider-Man's feet. Spider-Man however, simply believes that he missed him accidentally. “Run Peter!” yelled a worried Twilight. Spider-Man: It's just not your day pal... “And that smart mouth is gonna get ya killed,” stated Rarity. The batarang then explodes which sends Spider-Man high into the air, and Spider-Man then lands near the rim of the building. While Spider-Man was recovering from the explosion, Batman jumps behind him as the Spider-Sense picks him up and throws a smoke bomb just as Spider-Man turns around. While it does not affect the web slinger, Batman uses the smoke jump at Spider-Man and land a couple of hits on him, then knocks him back towards where he was. Fluttershy winced from hearing Batman beat Spider-man to a pulp. Spider-Man is now right at the edge of the building, where Batman throws bolas at him, wrapping around Spider-Man's torso. Spider-Man struggles to break free from the bolas, but then an explosive at near his feet explode, which was likely put there by Batman when the smokescreen was still up. “Man this guy really is sneaky!” gasped out Spike. Not even noticing that Batman had put down the explosive in the first place. Spider-Man is thrown off the top of the building from the force of the explosion. He starts to spin as he falls and then shoot a web at the building's walls to pull himself forward and stick to them. But the moment he touches them, Batman swings in with his grappling gun and kicks him straight through the glass, shattering the glass into pieces. “Bat’s is just letting up!” said a nervous Rainbow Dash. with Twilight next to her giving the screen a worried look. As Spider-Man bounces and tries to recover, Batman uses his grappling gun again and disappears on to the ceiling. Once he recovered, Spider-Man looks around the building for Batman. Suddenly, a batarang then flies in from the broken glass and breaks all the light bulbs, making the room completely dark. Batman tries to sneak up on the wall crawler, but triggered Spider-Man's Spider-Sense which alerts him. He then shoots a web from his left hand from his web shooter, bringing The Dark Knight down to the ground and making Batman visible to Spider-Man. “Ya! Spider sense for the win!” cheered Spike and Rainbow Dash, while Twilight let out a sigh of relief. The two continue to fight from inside the building. Spider-Man rapidly attacks Batman furiously, but Batman notices his pattern, and then Batman counters Spider-Man's quick attacks with more stronger, powerful attacks. Eventually, Spider-Man shoots his webs at Batman and web rodeo slammed him against the window, cracking some of the glass from the other side of the building. Spider-Man leaped across the room to Batman, ready to attack. Batman suddenly uses his bat transponder to summon a swarm of bats to come in, breaking the rest of the glass and pushing Spider-Man back, while also distracting him. Spider-Man then rushes up to him and kicks Batman out the window. Spider-Man: Pardon moi! Team Spider-Man cheered as they thought their fighter had won. Suddenly, the Dark Night's grappling hook snares Spider-Man's foot, quickly making our web shooter fall from the building as well. “Ya! Don’t let the varment win!” cheered Applejack as the rest of team Batman sighed in relief. He then starts shooting his webs again at The Dark Knight, pulling himself towards him to continue the fight. They both fall through the air, continuing to trade blows. Spider-Man pushes Batman downwards to try and make him hit the ground first, but Batman uses his glider to get back up to Spider-Man, put him underneath his foot and slam him against a bystander's car and smash it. Spider-Man lays down, trying to recover, as Batman jumps away from the vehicle which then, unsurprisingly, explodes sending Spider-Man flying through the air. “He really likes making things blow up huh Pinkie Pie? Asked Rarity, but only getting a silent nod from the disguised mare. When he gets back on his feet, Batman shoots his grapple gun, which Spider-Man ducks, evading Batman's attack. The two lunged at each other to attempt to attack, but Spider-Man is then electrocuted by Batman's 200 volt suit and knocked away by Batman, uncontrollably knocking down to the ground multiple times. Team Spider-Man winced as they saw their fighter get beaten mercilessly. While team Batman cheered for their Fighter. The Bat then throws two explosive batarangs, one which Spider-Man avoids, but as the second one flies away Spidey uses his web shooter to catch it saying "Whoopsy", throwing it back and hitting Batman, who shields himself, with his cape, from the explosion but is knocked back. Just as he recovered, Batman was suddenly hit by a web in the face, losing his sight and leaving Batman vulnerable. Spider-Man: Having fun yet? “Ya are ya?” snarked Rainbow, getting a scared gulp from team Batman. Spider-Man then shoots a barrage of webs, which hit Batman as Spider-Man shoots more webs at a more faster pace. Batman is eventually pushed into a giant web, which was created by the shoots that missed, and has his body constricted by the ones that hit him and couldn't break free of the webbing (which the webbing is strong enough to hold The Hulk or a person but dissolves in 1 hour). Spider-Man then shoots a load of webbing at once behind him to create a slingshot. “Nooo! Wined Rarity as she could see that Batman wasn’t going to win. Spider-Man: It's all or nothing! “GOOOOO!!!” cheered Twilight along with Spike and Rainbow Dash. Spider-Man pulls back on it and then rockets forward from the force and goes into a kick position. He nails Batman and separates his upper body and head from his limbs which are still caught in the web trap. Spider-Man/Rainbow: Loooossserrrr! “DAMN!” cried Applejack and Rarity, as Fluttershy covered her eyes from the gory seen. He lands, with Batman's torn up, bloody body sliding after him. Spider-Man: Sorry about that. Web Swing! Spider-Man then web swings away from the scene. K.O.! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Results (*Cues: The Amazing Spider-Man - Saving New York*) Boomstick: Damn that was brutal! Show it again! “Please don’t,” whimpered Fluttershy wishing she didn't just see that brutal victory. Wiz: Despite Batman possessing more skill and knowledge, Spider-Man's abilities ultimately overpowered his arsenal. “There's only so much that you can prepare for,” stated Twilight. Boomstick: To be fair, Bats might have been able to deal with Spidey's strength and speed, but that damn Spider-Sense changes everything! Wiz: Right, the Spider-Sense counters surprise and stealth, Batman's most valuable weapons. The group nodded in agreement. Batman relaid on those two things and when they were taken away, he lost a good chunk of ways to fight. Boomstick: But how could Batman lose to a wimpy Spider-Nerd, when he defeated the entire Justice League on his own? “What does being a nerd have anything to do about it?” asked the alicorn Princess with narrowed eyes. Wiz: Many of Batman's greatest achievements have required weeks or months of preparation and planning, which can hardly be compared to the one-on-one confrontation of a Death Battle. Keep in mind, if we have given Batman prep time, the same would be done for Spider-Man. “Learning about your enemy could go a long way,” Rarity said, agreeing with Wiz’s statement. Boomstick: And all of Wayne's money, and the Commissioner's men, couldn't put Batman together again. Everyone face hoofed at that terrible rhyme. Wiz: The winner is Spider-Man. END! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ “That was an intense battle,” Twilight said, getting off the couch. Everyone else copied her movement and started to walk towards the box. “Yeah, it was awesome,” Rainbow said, flying in circles. “Spider-man was dodging left and right but Batman wouldn’t let him go. That was my kind of fight.” “It was interesting but I think we should see what the box gives us today,” Rarity said, pointing at the glowing box. Everyone looked at the box as Pinkie grabbed the top and lifted it up. Looking inside, everyone saw a bunch of comics that everyone took. “Alright, can’t wait to see Spider-man kick some flank,” Rainbow said, putting the comic in her saddle bag. “Is there anything else?” Rarity asked, feeling a bit annoyed she was getting comics yet again. They did give her some ideas for dresses and suit but she wanted to get something a bit more useful like her ribbon. Twilight looked in the box and used her magic to pull out some kind of bracelet while Spike reached inside and pulled out some kind of claw. “Is that…” Rainbow said, looking at the items that her friends were holding. Twilight was looking at the bracelet while turning it every way she could until she saw a strange button. Pushing the button, Twilight was shocked as a webline shot out and stuck to the wall. Spike looked at the claw as he began to smile. Looking around the room, Spike pointed the claw at the door and pulled the trigger. The claw flew towards the doorknob and stuck to it while dragging Spike. The girls closed their eyes as Spike collided with the door, breaking it. Spike got back up and said, “I’m okay. Just need to practice.” “That’s not fair. Twilight gets a web shooter and Spike gets a grappling claw. You sure there’s nothing else?” Rainbow asked, wanting to get something awesome. She saw Pinkie hold up a belt and faste it around her waist. Suddenly the door slammed open as a familiar voice said, “Sorry I’m late. I had to help out at Sugarcube Corners.” Everyone turned towards the door and were shocked that Pinkie just walked into the room. Fluttershy, holding onto Super Doomguy Plushie, looked confused and asked, “What did you say, Pinkie? If you don’t mind.” “I was helping the Cakes, so that’s why I’m late. You didn’t start the episode, right?” Pinkie asked, looking ready for something “If you were helping the Cakes darling, then who was here with us?” Rarity asked, slowly turning to where ‘Pinkie’ was standing. The masked mare, seeing everyone looking at her, put her hoof next to the belt and pulled out a small ball like object and threw it towards the ground. The ball hit the floor and filled the room with a white smoke cloud. A moment later, the smoke cleared up and everyone saw the masked mare disappeared as they had one thought running through their heads. ‘Who was that?’ Later The masked mare appeared on a balcony at Canterlot Castle. She pulled off her mask to reveal the face of Princess Luna to the world. “Now my night time activities will be more fun,” Luna said, using her magic to undo the belt. Levitating the it in front of her, she said, “I will say that Batman has good tastes in these gadgets … He wasn’t bad looking himself.” said the princess of the night with a small blush. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Chapter end! Next time Pikachu vs Blanka
Pikachu VS Blanka.Everyone just stood where they were, trying to figure out what just happened. They just saw Mare-Do-Well, who they thought was Pinkie Pie, use a smoke pellet and disappeared from sight. “That was strange,” Spike said, summing up everyone’s thoughts. “Yeah, um do you girls want to watch another one?” Twilight asked, addressing her friends but looked at Pinkie the next moment. “We could watch the episode again if you want to see it, Pinkie,” Twilight said, being nice to her hyper friend. “I can watch it later. Now start the next episode,” Pinkie said, bouncing towards the couch. The others just looked each other and shrugged helplessly. After they all took a seat on the couch, or cloud for somepony, Twilight pressed play on the remote. Interlude (*Cues: Invader - Jim Johnston*) Wiz: When you think of an electric charged combatant, these two always come to mind. Pikachu, Ash's first Pokémon... “Awwww~!” cooed Fluttershy when she saw the little yellow mouse. Boomstick: ...and Blanka, the man-beast of Brazil. “Now that’s a beast!” said Rainbow Dash after seeing the green beast. Wiz: I'm Wizard and he's Boomstick, and it's our job to analyze their weapons, armor and skills, to find out who would win a Death Battle. Pikachu (*Cues: The Matter's Settled - Pokémon anime*) Wiz: Standing barely over one foot tall, and weighing less than a newborn baby, Pikachu is the quick-footed electric mouse Pokémon, and the first under the command of Ash, a 10-year old trainer from Pallet Town, because you don't need puberty to travel the world by yourself. “Awwwww!” everyone gushed once everypony got a good look at the electric mouse Pokemon. “Look at it’s chubby red cheeks!” gushed Rarity. “I bet starlight would love to see this!” Twilight said still wondering where her friend/student was. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~where in the world is Starlight Glimmer~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ We find our unlucky mare traveling through the forest with a look of annoyance on her face as she made her way towards the exit that would lead her back home. “Finally i’m almost home,” Starlight said in relief as she walked closer towards her goal. But a large figure, a gray manticore ump out in front of her and much to Starlight’s amazement and annoyance it started to speak. “Halt!” the Manticore bellowed. “Yon interlopers are trespassing on the ancient forest of the Everfree! If ye wish to make it out alive, first, ye must complete seven unworldly quest, each, more difficult than the--” but it’s speech was cut short as a boulder slammed into the mystic beast, courtesy of a annoyed Starlight Glimmer who was glaring daggers at the fool who dared waste her time. “I got your quest right HERE!!!” screamed the mare as she slammed the boulder into the Manticore over and over again. After venting out her anger starlight made her way towards the exit, not caring for the beaten beast that she left behind, and after a short walk Starlight was greeted to the site of the clear blue skies and the luscious green fields. But more importantly she saw the town of Ponyville and the Castle of friendship in the distance. “Finally I’m home.” Starlight said with tears of joy running down her face, and after wiping them away she soon started galloping her way towards her destination. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Boomstick: Pikachu is now Ash's most loyal and trusted companion, but he sure didn't start that way. He was actually, kind of a dick. Then again, if a 10-year old was trying to trap me in a tiny ball and make me fight other creatures to the death, I'd probably fuck him up too. “I could understand that,” said Rainbow Dash. imagining doing the same thing if someone was trying to tame her. Background Height: 0.4 m / 1'4" Weight: 6.0 kg / 13.2 Ibs Ability: Static Pokédex number 25 Dislikes his Pokéball Likes ketchup Can absorb and use more electric power than a normal Pikachu Wiz: Being so small, Pikachu has low stamina and physical strength, but more than makes up for it with speed. However, his EV training was arbitrary and inconsistent. “What?” everyone said, not understanding what Wiz said. Boomstick: EV what now? “Ya what Boomstick said.” commented Rainbow Dash. Wiz: Effort Value training. Every time a Pokémon wins a battle, one of its abilities improve depending upon the opponent. Taking the first seasons of the show into account, we have compiled an estimation of Pikachu's statistics upon reaching his maximum level. By defeating so many Spearow early on, Pikachu's speed is off the charts. Statistics HP: 182 = Below average Attack: 144 = Average Defense: 108 = Below average Sp. Attack: 123 = Average Sp. Defense: 80 = Below average Speed: 291 = Above average “Oh ya! Another speedster!” cheered Dash. “But it suffers by being a glass cannon though,” said Twilight. (*Cues: Pokémon - Champion Red Remix*) Boomstick: The little lightning rat isn't just quick. He's got two incredibly powerful weapons built into his face! Those aren't just rosy cheeks, they're electricity sacks, which he uses for attacks like his trademark Thunderbolt, and when that won't do the trick, he can use the extra-fast Quick Attack to surprise his foes, or Iron Tail, which turns his tail hard as steel. Electro Ball is a projectile that, for some reason, deals more damage the slower an opponent is. But when things get serious, he'll bust out his greatest attack. The Volt Tackle. The group steared in awe as Pikachu starts accelerating at incredible speeds and is enveloped in a golden electric aura as he charges towards and slams against the enemy pokemon which creates a devastating impact. “So cool!” cheered Pinkie Pie. “That was so awesome!” Spike said with a starry eyed look. Wiz: The Volt Tackle strikes with the force of a mouse-powered megaton warhead, but there's a catch. Pikachu receives recoil damage equaling 33% of the total damage dealt. This move cannot be used lightly. “That seems like a very steep drawback,” Rarity commented. Seeing it as a last resort kind of attack. Move Set Thunderbolt Type: Electric (Special Attack) 10% chance of paralyzing target Thunder Type: Electric (Special Attack) 30% chance of paralyzing target Low accuracy Quick Attack Type: Normal (Physical Attack) Increased priority over opponent's attack Iron Tail Type: Steel (Physical Attack) 10% chance of lowering target defenses Electro Ball Type: Electric (Special Attack) Deals more damage to slower targets Volt Tackle Type: Electric (Physical Attack) Deals 33% recoil damage to Pikachu 10% chance of paralyzing target (*Cues: Pokémon - Gotta Catch 'Em All (Orchestra Version)*) Boomstck: Well that's dumb. It's like, "Hey I can kill you, but I'm gonna blow off my arm!" “So it’s more of a last resort move?” Spike asked Twilight who nodded. “It seems like it but Pikachu needs to be careful with the recoil,” Twilight said, thinking the move can make or break the tiny mouse. Ash: That's kinda weird. Wiz: Regardless, Ash's Pikachu is astounding. He's like a living battery, weaponized. Not only can he discharge an enormous amount of power, he can also absorb electricity and use it against his foes. In fact, he can conduct more wattage than any normal Pikachu, making him one of the toughest of his kind. “So he’s a cut above the rest of his kind.” said Applejack, impressed with the little guy. “I know how that feels,” bragged Rainbow Dash, getting a few eye rolls from the group. Feats Strong against flying & water foes Developed Thunder Armor move Developed Counter Shield move Developed spin dodge Beat Drake's Dragonite with help Defeated Brandon's Regice alone Team Rocket's worst nightmare Boomstick: Yeah, but he's got his limits, get too much electricity stored up and BOOM! No more Pikachu. “Eeep!” squeaked Fluttershy. Turning green at the thought of Pikachu exploding. Wiz: It's true. Pikachu is still a tiny mouse Pokémon with very clear limits. And even though he has long since reached his maximum potential, he refuses to evolve into the vastly superior Raichu due to some pretentious excuse of love and acceptance. What a waste of potential, can you imagine how powerful he could be as a Raichu? Weaknesses Small and fragile Little solo battle experience Susceptible to overcharge Poor defenses against ground-based attacks Weak special attacks against dragon, electric, grass, & ground foes Refuses to evolve “I agree! He would be able to eliminate a lot of his weaknesses if he evolved and got stronger,” Twilight afreed. “Wonder why he doesn't after staying in that form for so long?” wondered Spike. “For merchandise?” said a confused Pinkie Pie. Boomstick: But Pikachu's accomplished quite a lot of impressive feats on his own. He's beaten legendary Pokémon and developed new fighting techniques like the Counter Shield and Midair Spin Dodge. He may be the size of a squirrel, but he's one tough fighter. Pikachu: Pikachu! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ The group had to admit for such a little guy, Pikachu was a tough little guy and some ponies like Fluttershy hoped he would win. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Blanka (*Cues: Blanka's theme - Metal Cover*) Wiz: As a child, Jimmy Blanka was a pale-skinned Brazilian boy. That is, until the horrific plane crash... Boomstick: Like "Lost"! “What’s Lost?” asked Spike. “Sounds like something with an interesting setup but with a very disappointing ending,” deadpanned Pinkie Pie. Wiz: Of which he was the sole survivor, stranded in the Amazon. Trapped in an area filled with dangerous predators, he was forced to camouflage himself day and night. After many years of this, his skin absorbed enough chlorophyll to turn a permanent green hue. The group felt bad for Blanka having to go through that at such a young age. “The poor dear…” Rarity said with a sadden voice. Boomstick: Really? I always thought he was just some kind of jungle monster beast guy. Background Height: 1.92 m / 6'3.5" Weight: 98 kg / 217 Ibs Real name: James "Jimmy" Hobbies: Hunting, electrical work Previously pale skinned Friends with Dan & Sakura Survived in Amazon for years Wiz: Despite his appearance, Blanka is actually extremely passive and gentle. However, piss him off and he enters an unstoppable bloodlust. “That’s… extreme,” Applejack said. “Well at least his time in the wild didn’t make him a hostel all the time,” added in Fluttershy. Boomstick: Well, that seems like a pretty drastic change. Wiz: But before he was old enough to fight the predators himself, he was forced to live off of electric eels as his primary food source. After years of this diet, he developed a high resistance to electricity and somehow gained the ability to produce similar electric shocks. “B-but that’s scientifically impossible!” shouted Twilight. “Uh-oh the egg head is cracking again,” said Rainbow Dash. worried that another want it need it situation might happen. Boomstick: Be right back! Getting eels! “No Boomstick NO!” shoutet Pinkie Pie. “Yes Boomstick YES!” cheered Rarity, with a hopeful smile on her face. Wiz: No, Boomstick, it doesn't work like that. Plus, we kind of have a show to do. “Listen to your friend,” begged Fluttershy. Boomstick: Fine, but afterwards, I'm proving you wrong. “Go for it! I’m rooting for you!” Rarity said supportively, but her friends could tell the smile on her face was anything but kind. Wiz: Okay. Blanka eventually found his way to civilization by complete accident, and found a friend in Dan Hibiki, the absolute worst Street Fighter on earth. "I don't know who this Dan is, but he sounds disappointing" Twilight said with a flat look. "He is a disgrace to the color pink." growled Pinkie. (thank whiteoak019 for the joke.) Boomstick: Ahh, Dan, couldn't get any real people friends, so you had to resort to jungle Frankenstein over here. “That’s… pretty sad,” deadpanned Fluttershy in a dry tone. Wiz: After arriving in the city, Blanka entered the second World Warrior Tournament, and discovered he was one of the most agile competitors there, leaping and ducking around his opponents with ease, like a jungle monkey, which is basically what he is. The group was impressed with how agile the burly being was. Boomstick: He uses a self-taught martial art which he learned while fighting...friggin' crocodiles and jaguars, that's what! “Awsome!” Dash and Pinkie cheered with star struck looks in their eye’s. “The poor animals…” whimpered out Fluttershy. Wiz: He has several unique attacks, like the Beast Roll, with which he hurdles through the air like a bullet, obliterating all laws of physics. Twilight’s eyes began to twitch at the blatant disrespect to physics. Move Set Amazon River Run Rock Crusher Electric Thunder Beast Roll Vertical Beast Roll Backstep Beast Roll Boomstick: I dunno which jaguar or crocodile taught him that move, but shit, I want it! That aside, he's also got a few super moves. The Ground Shave Roll is a chargeable spin attack, and with Shout of Earth Blanka can fire off a wave of uncontrollable electric energy. But you really gotta watch out for the Lightning Cannonball, where he rockets forward as spinning ball of electric death. Blanka hits Balrog with Lightning Cannonball. Announcer: K.O.! The group were stunned by the deadly and flashy move and Fluttershy was getting a little worried for Pikachu’s chances at winning. Super Moves Grand Shave Roll Chargeable spin attack Shout of Earth Can electrify the ground or shoot a bolt straight up Lightning Cannonball Electric spin attack Wiz: Blanka is a deadly fighter and obviously an extremely tough survivor. However, his greatest weakness comes from his lack of formal training. In fact, the only training he's ever had was under the tutelage of...guess... Boomstick/everyone: Don't say it... Wiz: Dan Hibiki. Everyone face hoofed at the extreme misfortune of being trained by that loser. Boomstick: That's like anti-training. “That poor son of a gun,” said Applejack, Feeling bad for poor blanka. Weaknesses Preferably docile Susceptible to cold Never won a tournament Only formal training came from Dan Hibiki (the worst Street Fighter character by far.) Wiz: And yet, he has proven his combat skills time and time again. Though he did not win the World Warrior Tournament, he was picked from hundreds to represent Brazil, and through it, rediscovered his mother and hometown. At long last, Blanka had come home. The group shed a few tears of joy when they saw the scene of Blanka hugging his mother after so many years of being separated from each other. Feats Grew up alone in the Amazon Honed skills against predators Found his long-lost family Local hero Represented Brazil in the second World Warrior tournament Immune to most viruses Boomstick: Most terrifying family reunion ever. “Still sweet though,” Rarity said wiping away a few tears. The group smiled warmly as they saw Blanka plays and jumps around with children while he laughs. Wiz: Alright, the combatants are set. Let's end this debate once and for all. Boomstick: It's time for a Death Battllllleeeee! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ On team Pikachu: Fluttershy. Team Blanka: everyone else. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Death Battle (*Cues: Pokémon - Lance Battle Final (Remastered)*) Pikachu and Blanka face each other in a forest, presumably the Amazon. FIGHT! Blanka attacks Pikachu and knocks him backwards. Pikachu then jumps back and attacks him with a Thunderbolt, but no dice. “Uh-oh,” whimpered Fluttershy. Blanka/Rainbow Dash: "Not good enough!" Blanka attacks Pikachu with a Beast Roll, and knocks the electric mouse out of the air and down to the ground, but Pikachu quickly gets back on his feet and charges at Blanka with a Quick Attack, flying by him numerous times and then hitting him head on. “The little guys determin I’ll give him that,” complemented Applejack. “But let’s see how far that takes him,” said Twilight. Pikachu follows it up by quickly jumping back into the air, and starts to spin as he hits Blanka in the head with an Iron Tail. He then charges at Blanka, picks him up and starts to roll him backwards to throw him upwards, only for Blanka to quickly get back down and do the same. “It’s pretty even right now,” commented Spike. However, just before Pikachu hits the ground, Blanka uses his Electric Thunder move to attack Pikachu, but Pikachu retaliates with a Thunder attack. “Nice move but his electricity based attacks aren't doing the full damage against Blanka,” stated Rainbow Dash. (*Cues: Street Fighter IV - Survive the Jungle (Blanka's Theme)*) Blanka is knocked backwards, while Pikachu lands on his feet, and quickly follows it up with another Thunderbolt, but Blanka simply blocks it again and charges at Pikachu with another Beast Roll. Pikachu charges at him as well, but uses the midair spin dodge technique to go right by him. “That was some quick thinking!” awed Rarity, impressed with Pikachu’s quick thinking. Blanka stops rolling, wondering where his opponent went as Pikachu charges up and fires an Electro Ball. Blanka looks through his legs behind him, only to get hit by the attack and fall down. “Yay~!” cheered Fluttershy thinking that Pikachu had just one. (*Cues: Burning Battlefield - Pokemon Anime*) Pikachu gives a peace sign as Blanka jumps back up and rockets forward at Pikachu with a Lightning Cannonball, to which Pikachu attacks back with a Volt Tackle. ‘This is it!’ everyone thought as they saw the two moves collide. The attacks collide and electricity is flying everywhere. The camera zooms in to see both Pikachu and Blanka firmly keeping their attacks going. The group leaned in wondering who would win this battle of power. But soon after, Blanka grabs Pikachu and bites his head off much to Fluttershy’s horror. Blanka then pulls out a blender and puts the rest of Pikachu's body in it. The man-beast drinks what's been made, belches (with a few sparks in it), and then starts scratching his chin. K.O.! The group was stun at the unusual victory. But most of them snapped out of it when they noticed Fluttershy glaring at the screen. “Sugarcube calm down before you do something reckless,” warned Applejack. But her effort was for not, as Fluttershy flew towards the tv, fully intent on breaking it. “GET HER!” screamed Rainbow Dash as everyone quickly dogpiled on the yellow mare and held her down but the usually shy mares strength was proving to be to much for the group. “PLUSHIE!” Spike yelled to Twilight who used her magic to grab the Doomguy plushie and have go in front of Fluttershy and giving her a hug, calming her down and making her hug it back. “Yey. unconditional love,” said the yellow mare as she hugged her Plushie hader. The rest of the group sighed in relief as they all got up and went back to their seats. (thank Alphamon_Ouryuken for the joke.) ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Results (*Cues: Pitch-Black Jungle - Street Fighter IV*) Boomstick: You know, I've always wanted to eat a Pokémon. What? They look delicious! Spike secretly agreed. Wiz: Pikachu may be powerful, but he can't compete with Blanka's ruthless skill. “Blanka just wouldn't give him the breathing room,” Spike stated. Boomstick: Even though Pikachu was clearly quicker on his feet, his attacks had little effect. Blanka can resist the electric attacks, and the Iron Tail's a steel-type move, which, as we all know, is weak against electricity. Pikachu's only option was to outmatch Blanka's physical strength and stamina, which was just too much for the little guy. Fluttershy just held her Plushie closer after thinking about the brutal battle that just happened. Wiz: And despite keeping a clear head, Pikachu rarely shows any exemplary competence or aptitude on his own. Many of his greatest achievements are actually a result of his trainer's quick thinking or downright luck. “If he was able to act more independently he might of won,” Twilight theorized. Boomstick: Everything was going well, until Pikachu lost his head. “Even I found that in poor taste,” commented Pinkie Pie dryly. Wiz: The winner is Blanka. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Boomstick: Next time on Death Battle. Everything was dark and nothing is happening. "Is the tv broken?" Rainbow Dash asks. But before anyone could respond, they started to hear unfamiliar chanting. ???: Kaaaaaaaaaa meeeeeeeeee haaaaaaaaaa meeeeeeeeee- They see the light starting to brighten up as they also see something that is forming a shape but can't make it out clearly enough. ???: HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!! The light burst even brighter and they now see a symbol that is an emerald shape with the letter "S" inside it. The screen fades to white and complete silence. Until the silence was broken by our two host. Boomstick: HOLY FUCKING SHIT! Wiz: OH MY GOD! Boomstick: SOMEONE GET ME A MOTHERFUCKING TABLE TO FLIP! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ “Well that was something,” Spike said, walking over to the box. “Yeah, I’m just glad that nothing bad happened,” Twilight said, looking back at Fluttershy who was hugging her Doomguy plushie. She repressed a shudder at the thought of Fluttershy about to blow up. “Yupper runny. Now let’s see what’s inside….” Pinkie said, moving her hoof to the box as the top moved a bit. Pinkie stopped and tilted her head to the side. “Um, is something wrong?” Fluttershy asked, wondering why Pinkie stopped. “I think the box moved,” Pinkie said, not sure of what was going on. Twilight rolled her eyes and said, “Sure it did, Pinkie. Now can you open the box.” Pinkie was about to say something when Fluttershy few towards the box and slowly lifted the lid. Fluttershy took a look inside as the lid flew off, making her back off a bit. After a moment of waiting, they saw a small yellow and black thing jump out of the box and land in front of Fluttershy. The thing had a pale yellow coat with a black tip ears and a black tail with pink cheeks. It’s tail was black and bent as it moved around. The creature looked around then looked at Fluttershy before walking over to her. Fluttershy’s eyes went wide as the creature stopped a foot in front of her and waved at her. “Chu~” cooed the little creature. Trying to get the young mares attention. Fluttershy picked up the little critter and hugged it as it hugged her back. “What is that?” Rarity asked, confused just like the others. As she said that, the box glowed while Twilight looked inside and saw a thin red rectangular object with a glowing blue center. Picking it up, Twilight looked at it and said, “What’s this?” The object extends and said, “Pichu, the Tiny Mouse Pokémon. A pre-evolved form of Pikachu. Despite their size, Pichu release bursts of electricity that can shock even humans. However, Pichu are unskilled at controlling their electricity, and sometimes release it by accident when surprised, or when laughing and shock themselves.” it explained before folding back up. Fluttershy stopped hugging the Pichu as she looked at it and said, “You’re a pokemon? Yay.” “And this is some kind of device that has information on Pokemon,” Twilight said, before she was hit with a paper ball. Unraveling it, she said, “And it’s called a Pokedex. …...Dibs.” “Seriously, you girls get the good stuff. Please let there be something good in there,” Rainbow said, flying to the box. She was a bit disappointed to find comics, a few mangas and a red hat with goggles on them. “I’ll take the hat, if you don’t mind. I have an outfit that this would go well with this,” Rarity said, picking up the hat and putting it on her head. “Guess i’ll take some more comics,” Rainbow grumble as the rest of them divide the comics and mangas evenly. Pinkie took some of the Pokemon mangas as Rainbow and Applejack took the Street fighter comics and Spike had a few of each. “Well girls, I guess i’ll see you tomorrow for the next episode,” Twilight said, sitting on the couch to try the pokedex. “Alright Twi, we’ll see you later,” Applejack said, walking towards the door. She was just about to open the door when it slammed open causing everyone to jump out of the way or in freight. After their hearts calmed down, they saw their friend Starlight Glimmer standing their with her mane a mess and her coat dirty. “I’m back!” Starlight yelled as her friend all ran to her and gave her a hug. “Starlight, we’re so glad to see you,” Pinkie said, giving her a bear hug. “I figured Pinkie. Now please let me go, you’re starting to hurt me,” Starlight said, feeling the hug starting to hurt. “OK,” Pinkie said, letting go of Starlight and causing her to land on shaky hooves. As Starlight straightened herself up, Twilight walked forward and gently wrapped her hooves around Starlight’s neck while a few tears ran down her face. “I was so worried,” Twilight said, as Starlight returned her hug. “Well I’m back so you don’t need to anymore,” Starlight said, gently nuzzling her friend. After a few moments, Starlight separated and said, “You won’t believe the time I had getting here.” “Um Starlight, why didn’t you just teleport here?” Twilight asked, causing Starlight’s eyes to twitch. “Yeah and why didn’t you fly? You could have gotten here faster than walking,” Rainbow said, causing Starlight’s eyes to twitch even more. Starlight just stood there, twitching violently as her friends were getting worried. “You okay, Starlight?” Twilight said as Starlight just fell to the floor in a twitching mess. With her friend on the floor, Twilight used her magic to lift her up and said, “Let’s get you in a bed,” while walking up stairs to her room. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Chapter end! Next time GOKU VS SUPERMAN!!!
Goku vs Superman.“Extra couch,” Twilight said, moving a new couch next to the one they already had. “Check,” Spike said, using a quill to write something on a scroll. “Snack table,” the young alicorn said as she place the last plate of snacks on the table that was placed near the couches. “Check,” the young drake said as he checked another item off the list. “And finally Starlight Glimmer,” the princess of Friendship said, looking towards said mare who was seated in front of the tv. Just now finishing the Pikachu, Blanka battle. Starlight could only laugh at her friend’s little joke as she watched the credits. After that, Starlight got up and said, “I can’t believe I missed this. It must have been fun to watch this with your friends.” Starlight looks at the floor in sadness as she felt something wrap around her back. Looking to the side, Starlight saw Twilight hugging her as she said, “Don’t think like that. You’re here now and we can enjoy them together with OUR friends.” Starlight nods and returns the hug, enjoying the warmth it brought. Suddenly the door slams open as a raspy tomboyish voice said, “We’re here to see some action.” The two mares turned to see Rainbow Dash and the rest of the girls walking through the door as they made their way into the room. “Hey, egghead. What’s with the extra couch and snack table?” Rainbow asked, hovering near the table while looking at the extra couch. “I don’t think we need that for just Starlight.” Twilight chuckles and said, “Not exactly.” “Did you invite somepony over then?” Applejack said, sitting at the end of the first couch. “I’m wondering that too, darling. With Spike either sitting next to you or in his beanbag chair, it doesn’t seem like we need an extra couch for one pony. A seat, maybe,” Rarity said, taking a seat next to Applejack. “We would like to know. If you don’t mind,” Fluttershy said, holding Doomguy Plushie in her hooves. “Well, you see ….I kinda,” Twilight began to say when a bright light filled the room, causing everyone to close their eyes. When the reopened them, they saw the princesses and Shining Armor standing in front of them. “Greetings, my little ponies,” Celestia said as everyone in the room bowed to her. “Please, we’re all friends here.” “What’cha doing here, princess?” Pinkie Pie asked, looking at them curiously. “You here to watch the next battle with us?” Celestia looked to the side, to see Twilight and Cadance do their dance, and said, “That is correct Pinkie. Twilight sent me yesterday, inviting my sister and I to watch the next battle.” “And Twilight send us a letter asking us the same thing. We even got Sunburst to baby sit Flurry Heart while we’re here,” Shining said, getting a hug from Twilight. “When we got the letter, we couldn’t say no.” “Now let us start this battle. I for one would like to see if they’re worthy of being ‘awesome’ as they say,” Luna said, taking a seat on the couch with everyone else doing the same. Twilight levitated the remote in front of her and pressed play. Interlude (*Cues: Invader - Jim Johnston*) (fades...) (*Cues: Goku vs Superman Theme from ScrewAttack's Death Battle - The Synthetic Orchestra*) Wiz: Born to dying races and sent to brave new worlds, these two alien saviors are legendary. The group where getting more and more interested after hearing that. “So it’s going to be a battle of two outworldly being?” asked an excited Twilight as she wondered what this two would bring to the table in this fight. “Huh? That’s funny,” said Spike. “What is?” Cadence asked the young drake. “Well it’s funny, the first episode of the show was about two people from space and now the first season ends with two people from space,” explained the drake. Causing the main group member to think back and realise that he was right. “Giggle! Your right Spiky!” said a giggling Pinkie Pie along with everyone else found amusing as well. Boomstick: And everybody wants to know who would kick whose ass in a fight. And I mean everyone. “This must've been a very sought after fight for the people that this show was made for.” commented Celestia. “It just makes it even more thrilling just thinking about who this two fighter are,” added in Luna Wiz: Goku, the tenacious Super Saiyan... Boomstick: ...and Superman, the Man of Steel. “Those are some awesome titles,” Rainbow said as everyone nodded in agreement. Wiz: To ensure no questions are left unanswered, we will be acknowledging every official resource for both combatants, though the original writings hold precedence. No mistranslations allowed. Also, as he was retconned and rebuilt in 1986, we will be examining the modern Superman. “Why though?” questioned a confused Shining armor. Boomstick: Considering Supe's pre-86 could make up new superpowers on the fly and destroy entire solar systems by sneezing, probably a good idea. He's Wiz and I'm Boomstick. “Uh-oh…” muttered Starlight as she saw her friend/slash treacher’s eye start to twitch at the absurd feats of power. ‘She’s not going to have a good time,’ the mare thought as she hoped this episode would not set Twilight off. Wiz: And it's our job to analyze their weapons, armor and skills to find out who would win... a Death Battle. Title sequence Screwattack presents... in collaboration with: Kanzenshuu Superman homepage The Dao of Dragon Ball SuperSite.com Team Fourstar Starring: "MasakoX" "It'sJustSomeRandomGuy" Animation by Jordan Lange Theme music by Blank Robinson Synthetic Orchestra Written and hosted by Ben Singer and Chad James Directed by Ben Singer Goku vs Superman “This is gonna be awesome~!” sang Rainbow Dash as she dug into her popcorn. Goku (*Cues: Dragon Ball - Makafushigi Adventure Instrumental Theme*) Goku is shown jumping upwards into the air at a stump of wood, then hits it, breaking it into smaller, even pieces of wood. He lands back on the ground while the wood perfectly stacks into a pile. “That was so cool!” cheered Spike wondering if he could do the same thing. “That was quite impressive,” complemented Rarity as the rest of the group also applauded after seeing such skill. Wizard: Kakarot was born to a low-class Saiyan warrior on the planet Vegeta. He narrowly escaped the extinction of his entire race when he was sent to Earth with a single, simple mission… Boomstick: Destroy everything! Then he conveniently bumped his head and forgot about it all. “Well that’s relief…” whispered Fluttershy. “But what kind of barbarians sends children out to kill?” questioned a disgusted Rarity “A baby should never be put through that,” muttered out Cadence as she imagined someone doing that to Flurry Heart. Wizard: Dubbed Goku by his adopted grandfather, his life revolves around combat. He cares little for anything else, unless food is involved. They watch a younger Goku eat a restaurant out of business. Goku: Can I have another bowl, please? (*friends/everyone fall over in shock*) “And I thought Pinkie Pie had an appetite,” muttered a shock Twilight. “Oooh~! I wonder how many cupcakes he could eat?” asked an excited Pinkie Pie. “I’d rather not find out,” muttered Spike feeling that it would take all of the cupcakes in ponyville to even get him half-way full. Background Full Name: Son Goku Birth Name: Kakarot Age: 53 [Body = 45] Height: 175 cm / 5'9" Weight: 62 kg / 137 Ibs Occupation: Radish farmer Masters: Muten Roshi, Korin, Popo, Kami, North Kai, Old Kai (*Cues: DB Raging Blast 1&2 - Ultimate Blast Soundtrack*) Boomstick: At 12 years old, he was trained by Master Roshi in Kame-Sennin Ryu, which pushes a person to superhuman levels. “Hmmm wonder if the royal guards could go through that type of training?” pondered Shining. “I think only my brother could handle that kind of physical labor,” commented Applejack. Training w/ Grandpa Gohan Kung-Fu & basic ki training w/ Roshi [Kame-Sennin Ryu] Intense labor develops superhuman ability w/ Korin Trains endurance & opponent anticipation w/ Kami & Popo Senses, meditation, & precision w/ King Kai Kaio-Ken Advanced ki training & 10x gravity Wizard: Complementing his Saiyan biology, Goku’s superhuman strength, speed and senses skyrocketed. He developed numerous fighting techniques including the fast-moving After-Image and the Dragon Throw, his trademark grapple. “Now those are fighting moves huh AJ?” Rainbow Dash asked her southern friend who only gave her a shrug as an answer. “I’m pretty comfortable with my fighting style,” said the southern mare. Fighting Techniques After-Image (Zanzoken) Dragon Throw Mimicry Rock, Scissors, 'N' Paper (Janken) Fist Shockwave Fist of Eight Hands (Hasshu-ken) Boomstick: At fifteen, he was already so powerful that the only worthy teachers left were gods... and a talking cat, but mostly GODS! He was only a kid and his power level was already enormous! “Talking cat?” said Fluttershy as she imagine a wise cat teaching her and her Doomguy plushie in the ways of martial arts. Vegeta/Pinkie Pie: It’s over 9,000!! Boomstick: Not yet! “Huh?” everyone said, looking confused at Boomstick’s interruption. (*video fast-forwards through the Dragon Ball Z series*) Boomstick: Okay, now it is. Nappa: What?! 9,000?! (*Cues: Dragon Ball Z - Main Theme*) Wizard: FALSE! In the Japanese manga, Goku’s power level at that time was 8,000. But it doesn’t even matter because power levels are absurd. “The entire point of introducing them was to show how unreliable and meaningless they were.” [Kanzenshuu] By relying on power levels, the villains constantly underestimated the heroes. Therefore, using them to judge Goku’s abilities is pointless. Besides, the Daizenshuu says that— Boomstick/Rainbow Dash: Dai-what now? “Even I’m confused,” commented Twilight trying to say the word in her head. Wizard: The Official Dragonball Encyclopedia. It states power levels eventually become immeasurable, not because they are so high they can’t be measured, but because the characters, and hopefully the audience, have realized just how futile these numbers are. “MY FAVORITE MEME IS A LIE!!!” cried Pinkie Pie in total Despair. (thank Alphamon_Ouryuken for the joke.) Raditz: I’m still ten times stronger than you are! Goku: That may be true, but strength isn’t the only thing that matters. “Yes will is another factor as well,” said Celestia as she gave goku approving look. (*Cues: DBZ - The Dragon Theme*) Wizard: We cannot judge Goku by his power level, nor can we through power scaling, the theory that he can achieve the same feats as lesser Dragon Ball characters. Goku’s abilities are tailored to his personal training and experiences, not to mention anatomy. Shows Frieza against Super Saiyan Goku, telling that the planet will blow up. The group shudder when they saw the tyrant for the first time. The cold smile and ruthless look in his eyes put any villain the girls had face to shame. Frieza: I can breathe in space... and you can’t. “(gasp!) But space is a vacum!” cried Pinkie Pie. “Vacuum…” corrected everyone else with a flat tone. Boomstick: However, Goku does have a knack for mimicking ki techniques. Wizard: “Ki is metaphysical, made up of things such as vigor, courage and being in one’s true mind.” [Kanzenshuu] “Sounds like they should be part of the elements,” Rainbow said, imagining a few more elements of harmony. Boomstick: It’s basically a kind of natural life force energy and is a fundamental component of Daoist medicine and martial arts. Oh, and uh, it’s NOT magic! “What!? But how can they do all those things without magic!?” yelled a confused Twilight as she tried to rap her head around the concept of someone not using magic to do those things. Wizard: Dragonball creates a very distinct difference between ki and magic. Ki is dependent on the physical ability of the user. “So i guess earth ponies could learn it,” said shining armor thinking out loud. (*Cues: Dragon Ball Z - Battle Theme*) Wizard: And magic-users like Babidi are clearly using something different. Goku harnesses and manipulates his ki energy— Boomstick: - into badass lasers and stuff, like ki blasts, energy barriers and the Destructo Disc, which he totally stole from Krillin. The Solar Flare blinds opponents and the Spirit Bomb puts energy from other things into a giant death ball... that takes freaking forever to make. “Those attacks look powerful,” Cadance said in awe. “The destructo Disk seems like my kind of attack," said Rarity “I should try the Solar Flare sometime,” Celestia muttered to herself. Unknown to her, Twilight was writing down these attack to see if they can recreate them later. Wizard: And energy taken from sentient beings must be voluntary. The Spirit Bomb is fueled by positive energy which is only effective against those filled with negative energy, AKA evil. In the Super Android 13 film, Goku actually absorbs the ki gathered from the Spirit Bomb, becoming one with it, transforming and manipulating the energy himself. “That attack. We need that attack,” Shining Armor said, imagining it helping them out in the near future. Ki Attacks Ki Blast Destructo Disk (Kienzan) Solar Flare (Taiyo-ken) Ki Barrier Kiai Cannon Spirit Bomb (Genki Dama) Dragon Fist Boomstick: But his two best moves are the Dragon Fist, where he super-charges his punch with a golden ki dragon and the one and only Kamehameha: a giant focused beam which every kid in the world has always wanted to do. Don’t lie, you’ve tried it. “Woah,” Spike, Rainbow and Shining said in complete awe by the Dragon Fist. But everyone had that same reaction when they saw Goku’s signature attack. Kamehameha Means "Turtle Destruction Wave" Concentrates ki into a single point Requires some time to charge Variants Jet - Propels Goku Bending - Directed in midair Super - Planet busting power Twin Dragon Shot - Releases as spheres Continuous - Rapid-fire 10x - Max output in Super Saiyan 4 After-effects blasts victim later Wizard: Goku also uses ki for telekinesis and high-speed flight. He can even sense the power and location of other ki sources and then teleport directly to them with Instant Transmission. “They can teleport too?” Twilight yelled, trying to comprehend how they can do this without magic. Boomstick: Which is light speed! (*Cues: Dragon Ball Z - Prologue & Subtitle II*) Goku: You dematerialize and travel as a mass of light. Wizard: Again, false. This is another mistake in translation. According to the original manga, “Instant Transmission is… well… instant.” [Kanzenshuu] Its only flaw is that it requires concentrated focus. “That’s faster than Rainbow Dash,” Starlight said, amazed at the extent of this technique. “A lot of things are faster than me now a days,” muttered an annoyed Rainbow Dash. “Like your boyfriend?” snarked Applejack, which got Rainbow Dash to yet again grab her notebook and start to write something down. “Ok seriously Dash what is that notebook for,” asked an annoyed Rarity. “Oh this? It’s just my revenge notebook,” answered Rainbow Dash with a shrug which got some confused looks from the guest and a cold chill going down the main group’s spine. “Revenge notebook?” asked a nervous Fluttershy. “Yep! Every time someone teses me about my crush on sonic i write it down and after a while the one who teased me the most will get pranked.” Explained Dash as she gave the group a terrifying grin. ‘Crap baskets,’ everyone else thought. Goku: (in his mind) It’s no good. I can’t concentrate. (*Cues: DBZ: Ultimate Tenkaichi - The Warrior*) Wiz: Also, he can read minds. “Unicorns can’t do that,” Starlight said, having studied a good number of Twilight’s books. Boomstick: Wait, what? Is there no limit to this ki thing? “That's what we would like to know,” commented Cadence, getting a few nods of agreement from the group. Ki Manipulation Telekinesis Flight Ki Sense Instant Transmission (Shunkanido) Telepathy Mind Reading Wizard: There is. Goku draws from a finite pool of ki energy. So to increase his power, Goku perfected the art of Kaio-Ken. This amplifies Goku’s ki, multiplying his strength, speed, defense and so on. “So he needs to be smart with how he uses it,” Rarity said just loud enough for everyone to hear. “It seems so but this Kaio-Ken looks like it could turn the tides of battle if used correctly,” Luna said, liking the technique. Boomstick: Only one problem: it puts a giant strain on his body and can even kill him. Footage from Tree of Might, fighting against Turles. Goku: Kaio-Ken... TIMES TWENTY!! “That needs to be used sparingly then,” Applejack said, knowing what it's like to push herself more than she should. Kaio-Ken Taught by North King Kai Multiplies ki and physical power Too much strain can be fatal Multiplication amount is controlled Goku's highests multiplication: 20x Wizard: But Goku does not have to rely solely on his ki. He wields the Power Pole, “a magical staff which expands and contracts” [Daizenshuu 7]. “And he uses a magical staff?” Twilight said, getting a bit of a headache from this. “One that extends, Twilight. Didn't we have one like that,Sister?” Luna asked, looking at Celestia. “I don’t believe so. Maybe we should check the old armory later and see,” Celestia said, thinking of what they could find in there. Inventory Power Pole (Nyoi-Bo) Indestructible Extends & contracts on command Limitless reach Boomstick: When he’s hurt, eating a Senzu bean heals him up and to get around, he rides the Flying Nimbus, a flying cloud which probably tastes like cotton candy. “Wish I had those beans. Then I wouldn’t have to be in the hospital so much,” Rainbow grunted while crossing her hooves. “You could avoid it if you stop doing your stunts so close to town,” Applejack said cheekily, getting a glare from her daredevil friend. “I so want a cloud like that. I could go anywhere and have a snack at the same time,” Pinkie said, imagining all the adventures she could do. “I doubt it would taste like cotton candy, darling,” Rarity said, trying not to crush Pinkie’s dreams. Flying Nimbus (Kinto-Un) Flies at Mach 1.5 Exclusive to people with a pure heart Senzu Beans Instantly heals wounds & broken bones Restores ki Stored in a belt pouch (*Cues: DBZ - Goku Super Saiyan Theme*) Wizard: Still, the Kaio-Ken was Goku’s trump card for some time until a fateful battle with the tyrant Frieza, who pushed Goku past his limits to achieve the legendary form of Super Saiyan. The group was in awe as they saw Goku turn in the legendary super saiyan form. “I know we saw this form with vegeta and all but the way goku did it was just way cooler,” commented Shining Armor in awe. “Truly a form like that deserve being called legendary!” cheered Luna. Boomstick: There are four different levels of Super Saiyan, each drastically boosting his power. Wizard: Like the Kaio-Ken, each form does burden his body, though Goku has trained to minimize this. The group sighed in relief, happy that Goku was able to master the form. Boomstick: Super Saiyan 3 multiplies the already combined power of Super Saiyan 2 by four, but comes at a horrible price: that hair! Oh, and it pretty much destroys his body while he’s using it, but MY GOD, THE HAIR! “Good gracious!” gasp out Rarity before fainting. Applejack rolled her eyes before shaking her drama queen of a friend awake. Wizard: Fortunately for Goku, the life-sapping Super Saiyan 3 would be trumped by his final transformation: Super Saiyan 4. This form alters his body to better endure the 4000x power increase. “4000x POWER INCREASE!!!” screamed the group while Twilight started to foam at the mouth and started to twitch violently. “Twilight!” screamed a worried Starlight. “ Shouldn’t we help her!?” she yelled at the group. “Meh she’ll be fine.” shrugged Rainbow Dash. “Just give her a moment to calm down,” added Cadence, showing the young unicorn that Twilight’s behaviour was a normal occurrence to the rest of the group. Boomstick: Complete with pink fur and eye shadow. Fear the ultimate form! That got a few chuckles from the group and was even able to calm down Twilight. Wizard: With each transformation, minus full-power Super Saiyan 1, Goku loses some self-control, becoming more violent and instinct-prone. Transformations Great Ape (Ozaru) Base power x 10 Full Powered Super Saiyan Base power x 50 Super Saiyan 2 Super Saiyan 1 power x 2 Super Saiyan 3 Super Saiyan 2 power x 4 Super Saiyan 4 Super Saiyan 3 power x 10 (*Cues: DBZ - Super Saiyan 3 Power Up*) Footage of SS4 Goku facing against one of the Shadow Dragons in GT. Goku: When I’m at this power level, it’s hard for me to listen to reason. I just lose control. “Eeep!” squeaked Fluttershy as she hid behind her doomguy Plushie. “That could lead to some trouble if Goku isn't careful,” commented Celestia with worry in her eyes. Wizard: Goku’s greatest strength is his tenacity and never-give-up attitude. “He does not fight to defeat others. He fights to defeat himself.” [The Dao of Dragonball] However, this may also be his greatest weakness. Boomstick: He prefers a fair fight, eager to see his opponent’s maximum potential. “That’s a bad idea. Letting your opponent power up could lead to one's destruction,” Luna said, shaking her head. King Kai: He’s about to reach his maximum. This could be your last chance. Goku: I want him to reach his maximum. I want to fight him when he’s at his best! “Even I Would rather just finished a bad guy instead of letting him get powered up.” commented Dash, seeing what Goku was doing was stupid. Wizard: But, when the whole world is at stake, well... hindsight is 20/20. Boomstick: And although he’s more than tough enough to survive in a vacuum, he clearly needs oxygen, so no breathing in space. Wizard: Plus, well… Goku’s not very bright. Despite some basic schooling from Roshi, Goku has never had a day of certified formal education in his life. It took him years just to learn how to drive. Boomstick: But why the hell would Goku need to drive a car? “They do look fun,” Shining and Spike said, thinking it would be cool to have those cars in town or the empire. Wizard: Even so, Goku understands his weaknesses. To him, a formal education would just be a waste of time. He is already a genius when it comes to martial arts. “Might as well stick to your strengths i gauss,” said Spike. Boomstick: And even if he does get the hell beaten out of him, he improves with every fight. “Hax! I call hax!” yelled Pinkie Pie. Weaknesses Avoids unfair advantages No formal education Sometimes too forgiving Super forms drain energy Limited amount of ki Wizard: And that is what Goku is all about. He thrives on becoming stronger and bursting limits and has overcome every obstacle in his way. The group felt nothing but respect For Goku. Boomstick: Even marriage. “Awwwww~!” the group awad as they saw Goku and Chichi’s wedding. Wizard: Goku might just be the greatest martial artist in fictional history. The group now sees Frieza bruised and terrified when Goku goes Super Saiyan. The group smiled seeing the once arrogant ruler now terrified. Frieza: What…. What are you?! Goku smirked and said: I am the hope of the universe. I am the answer to all living things that cry out for peace. Frieza is trembling even more at Goku's speech which is now giving the group hope and confidence. Goku: I am protector of the innocent. I am the light in the darkness. I am truth. The volcano is erupting as if to emphasise his point. Goku then erupts in a golden aura with a determined and fearless look on his face and shouts the final part of his speech to the heavens. Goku: Ally to good! Nightmare to you! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ The group were in awe after seeing the warrior known as goku and were now desperate to see how his opponent would stack up. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Superman The group watch in horror as a school bus falls in a nearby river as kids panic and begin to drown. “Someone has to save them!” screamed a panicked Luna and the rest of the group where nearly at the edge of their seats as they saw the children panic and scream. Mrs. Ross: My son was in the bus. the bus is then somehow pulled to shore. The one who saved the kids was a young boy who was wet and the look on his face showed hints of fear for what he did as the kids stare at him in both confusion and hints of fear. “Oh thank Harmony.” sighed Cadance in relief as her husband patted her back soothingly. “That young boy was truly brave to go out of his way to save them,” Celestia said with nothing but respect in her voice. Getting nods of agreement from the others. He saw what Clark did. (*Cues: Smallville Score - Trials*) Wizard: Kal-El was born to a high-class scientist on the planet Krypton. He narrowly escaped the destruction of his homeworld when his father sent him to Earth with the goal of preserving human life. The group now see a infant Kal-El be sent away in a small space shuttle before his home planet explodes into dust due to the unstable core. “So sad…” whimpered a Fluttershy as the rest of the group felt bad for both Goku and Superman. “It really sucks that these guys both lost their homes at such a young age,” muttered Rainbow Dash. Boomstick: Well, what a coincidence… except for the whole saving human life thing. “His father was truly a kind man to wish for his son protect another race of life,” Starlight said with a large amount of respect shining in her eyes. “I’m just glad that we're not seeing another race of creatures that do nothing but conquer other planets.” said Rarity. Still not liking the fact that the Saiyan race sends infants to kill all life on another planet. Boomstick: After landing on Earth, he was found and raised by the Kents, who decided to name him Clark. And weren’t they surprised when they found out he was an alien with superpowers. The group look in awe as they saw a young Clark lift up a truck with no effort at all. “That boy puts Big Mac’s strength to shame,” said Applejack, as she saw the young child’s godly strength. “We’ve only seen that kind of strength with fully grown Miniatures,” gasped out Twilight. Completely in awe seeing a child out muscle one of the most physically gifted races in their world. Wizard: After discovering his true heritage, Clark refused to accept his Kryptonian side. He subconsciously developed mental barriers that blocked him from attaining his full power, which he would work to uncover throughout the rest of his life. “It must have been hard to accept that you were an alien and not a human,” Starlight said, feeling sorry for the boy. To know you’ve been living a lie your whole life can cause anypony emotional stress. Background Alternate Identity: Clark Joseph Kent Birth Name: Kal-El Age: 39 Height: 6'3" Weight: 225 lbs. Married to Lois Lane Occupation: Pulitzer Prize winning Investigative Reporter Boomstick: Stupid power-limiting brain. Wizard: After graduating college in two years and traveling the world as a secret superhero, Clark moved to the city of Metropolis as an investigative reporter and donned the red and blue to publicly announce his presence as the Superman, defender of truth, justice and the American way!... until he renounced his American citizenship. “He still protects them. At least he does that,” Spike said with everyone nodding in agreement. Boomstick: Mild-mannered Clark kept his identity a secret with the brilliant disguise of nerdy glasses and wimpy demeanor... Superman, as Clark Kent, opens a bottle of champagne, but spills it. Clark Kent: Oh, I'm sorry! I'm sorry! Boomstick: ...proving that people only see what they want to believe. Wizard: Boomstick, that’s surprisingly profound. “Yes it is,” Cadance said with her aunts and husband looking shocked. “He does this sometimes,” Twilight said, her eyes wide. “How can he be smart enough to say things like that, yet sound like a disgusting pig?” Rarity muttered to herself, getting surprised from Boomstick’s explanation. Boomstick: *burps* Since then, his power’s been pretty inconsistent, mostly due to the writers doing whatever the hell they please. Rarity hmmped while sticking her nose up. “Wonder what they mean?” Celestia said, intrigued by the Man of Steel’s powers. (*Cues: Christopher Drake - All-Star Superman*) Wizard: Well, there is a legitimate explanation. Superman’s powers are dependent on the ultra-solar rays of the sun. By absorbing yellow or blue sunlight, his power rises; however he cannot absorb sunlight from a red star. So, if “you take away a yellow sun, you slowly take away Superman’s powers.” [Superman Super Site] Power Source Solar Radiation Constant Power Absorption Healing Factor Yellow Sunlight increases power (2700x-5500x) Red Sunlight has no effect (2700x) Blue Sunlight doubles increase (5500x; adds new abilities) Boomstick: He’s solar-powered! They call him the world’s first superhero but sounds more like the world’s first hippie to me. That got some snickers from the less mature members of the group while the rest just rolled their eyes. Wizard: Now, the intensity of solar radiation disperses the further away it gets from its source, so the closer Superman is to the sun, the more solar radiation he’ll absorb. “Sounds like your kind of hero dear sister,” teased Luna getting a playful shove from her sister. Boomstick: So he gathers more power the higher he gets? He IS a hippie. This brought on more laughter as some of the mature members rolled their eyes but chuckled. Wizard: In the Justice League series, Our Worlds at War, Superman actually spent fifteen minutes INSIDE the sun. When he resurfaced, he was powerful enough to effortlessly move planets. “HE DID WHAT?” Twilight asked as her hair began to ruffle up. “He spent fifteen minutes inside the sun,” Celestia said in a small voice. “We wouldn’t stand a chance against him,” Rainbow said as everyone shuddered at the thought of fighting Superman. Boomstick: He can also hear sounds millions of miles away, see through anything but lead, and spot things moving faster than light. Wizard: He can see at a subatomic level and hear through the vacuum of space… somehow. At this point Twilight was becoming a twitching mess. (*Cues: Justice League: Crisis on Two Earths - Opening Credits*) Wizard: He can even see your soul. Boomstick/everyone: What?! Wizard: It happened. Super Sense Super Hearing X-Ray Vision (with the exception of lead) Telescopic Vision Microscopic Vision Electro Magnetic Spectrum Vision Theta Vision (can see a person's aura) Boomstick: Well, weird abilities aside, Superman can freeze his enemies in ice or create hurricanes just by breathing, and to top it all off, he shoots laser beams from his eyes. “So cool! I want a laser face too!” cheered Pinkie Pie while the rest of the group was stunned silent from the SMALL list of powers in Superman’s arsenal. Wizard: His heat vision can be expanded to encompass anything within Superman’s sight and reach temperatures hotter than the sun. “Hotter than the sun…” muttered everyone, scared at the thought someone could launch an attack of that power with such ease. Boomstick: He can incinerate entire planets in a staring contest. “How can somepony have so much power!?” cried Spike in total disbelief. Wizard: However, “heat vision drains his power faster than any other ability.” [Superman Homepage], especially when he amps it up. Superman creates a huge beam of heat vision, taking out an army of Doomsday-like creatures. “... I think i just peed a little,” Squeaked Rainbow dash in fear. “I think we all did,” muttered Shining Armor. Wiz: And with precision, heat vision can reach microscopic levels invisible to the human eye. Powers Flight Super Strength Super Speed Healing Factor Super Breath Arctic Breath Heat Vision (Maximum Temperature: Unknown; drains solar power quickly) Superman: Heat vision, focused through your pupils like a scalpel… instant lobotomy. Superman slaps Manchester Black. “HA!” laughed everyone. (*Cues: Superman: The Animated Series - Main Theme*) Wizard: Superman can vibrate his body fast enough to phase through attacks, even turn invisible. By vibrating to just under light speed, Superman can use the infinite mass punch. This speed causes the relative mass of his fist to increase immensely and hit with the force of a supernova. At this point Celestia was in the same state as her former student after hearing some of the things superman can do. “Impossible…” muttered the two was they slowly turn into a twitching mess. “Ok is that normal?” asked a concern Starlight. “No but it’s quite fascinating,” answered Luna as she poked her twitching sister with a stick. Infinite Mass Punch Acceleration to near light speed creates relativistic mass Impact equivalent to 10 Octillion Megatons Uses a lot of energy Planet busting Speed force regulates durability if necessary, ensuring survival Boomstick: Which explodes at a force of 10 octillion megatons! Thanks fact-of-the-day calendar. Wizard: In comparison, this is the Tsar, the most powerful bomb mankind has ever tested: 50 megatons. Boomstick: So that punch is like 200 septillion super-nukes. That’s 24 zeroes, bitches! “Too many ZERO’S!!!” screamed an over dramatic Pinkie Pie. (*Cues: Superman Doomsday - Main Title*) Wizard: Superman is not only strong, but a genius with a super-brain that can process information thousands of times faster than an average human. He is capable of strategic fighting, even while traveling eight times the speed of light. “W-what!?” stuttered out Rainbow Dash. Genius Intellect Super Brain Perfect Photographic Memory Technological Genius Master Tactician Can read & memorize DNA Taught all remaining Kryptonian knowledge by Jor-El Boomstick: He’s an expert in disabling opponents through pressure point combat and once fought demons in Valhalla alongside Wonder Woman and Thor… for 1,000 freaking years! Everyone was stunned at that tidbit of information. “That is the coolest thing i’ve ever heard… of all time.” muttered out an awe struck Starlight. Wizard: He’s even learned to protect his mind from telepathic attacks. Superman: I heard your telepathic shout before, but my mind is protected from anything deeper by a series of psychic blocks. Manchester Black: Best I’ve seen, too. Wizard: He also studied two Kryptonian martial arts: Torquasm-Rao and Torquasm-Vo. Boomstick/Rainbow Dash: Orgasm-what now? “Oh my!” gasped out fluttershy with redden cheeks. Wizard: Torquasm-Rao is a hard martial art in which Superman enters the theta state, a real-life phenomenon in which a person becomes extremely receptive to information and instinct. Torquasm-Vo is a mental martial art with which Superman can fight off mind domination and illusions or even counterattack. “Now that's something i would like to learn,” said Spike. Wondering how strong he’d be if he mastered those skills. Boomstick: In order to master all his powers, Superman needed to break through his own self-created mental blocks, like how when he was younger, he believed he needed to eat food and breathe oxygen like humans, when he can really just survive on solar energy alone like some weird plant man. “I think we’ve found your perfect match aunty Celestia,” giggled out Cadence. Getting a few rounds of laughter from the rest of the group even Celestia herself couldn't help but laugh as well. Wizard: And thanks to some intense training from Mongol II, he managed to tear these barriers down and become the true Superman, capable of amazing feats. Boomstick: Yeah, like when he obliterated an F5 tornado with a round of applause... Martial Arts Pressure Points with Batman Hand to Hand with Wonder Woman Boxing with Wildcat Psychic Barrier with J'onn J'onzz With Mongol II (worked to uncover full potential) Torquasm-Rao & Torquasm-Vo (enhances and protects body and mind) (*Cues: John Williams - Superman Theme*) Boomstick: Or when he was the filling for a planet sandwich, or held a mini black hole in his hand... oh, or the time he dragged the freaking Earth around. Superman has survived some pretty crazy things. Like when Koldgast hit him with 15 supernovas to the face. “i-but-HOW!?” screamed Twilight in a fit of frustration. Koldgast: That was like 15 suns exploding in his face! Boomstick/Pinkie Pie: I/He just said that! Wizard: Exaggeration? Maybe, but he has survived other supernovas before. When he takes a hit, his super-dense molecular structure and bio-electric aura protects him and his suit. “Hmph! Wish I had an aura that protected me and my wonderful dresses from harm,” commented a frustrated Rarity. “Then ya should've been born in Remnant then!” said Pinkie Pie, completely breaking the fourth wall in the process. Boomstick: Holy crap, he sounds invincible! “He truly does,” said a intimidated Luna. (*Cues: Superman/Batman: Public Enemies - Opening Theme*) Wizard: Not exactly. His solar energy can be depleted over the course of a battle, if he takes too much damage or remains out of sunlight for too long. This is how the monster Doomsday was able to kill him. Oh, sorry, not kill, put him into a “healing coma”. Boomstick/Pinkie Pie: (*coughs*) Cop-out! Wizard: He also has several specific weaknesses, like the famous Kryptonite, radioactive fragments of his homeworld which bring him to his knees. “Any prolonged exposure will eventually kill him.” [Superman Super Site] He also has no special resistance to magical attacks. “Those seem like major weaknesses,” commented Applejack. Boomstick: And he always gets all hung up on doing the right thing, even if it makes his life miserable. Wizard: He does not fight for himself, but to protect others. Even the buildings in Metropolis are more valuable to him than his own life… (Superman punches Captain Marvel to the hospital, the building crumbling down) most of the time. The point is, Superman spends more time defending the city than actually improving his own abilities. (after they show Superman damaging the city during a fight) "Wow, reckless much?" commented Rainbow Dash, getting a flat look from Twilight. "Big talk considering what happens when you're not paying attention while you're flying." deadpanned Twilight with a flat look directed at the blue mare. “Shots fired!” gasped out Fluttershy. Rainbow Dash smirked at Twilight "Oh hi pot, my name is kettle, cast any “want-it, need-it" spells lately?" she snarked back. Causing everyone else to stare wide eyed at the the blue mare. “... gonna need a Senzu for that one,” muttered a wide eyed Pinkie Pie. (thank Alphamon_Ouryuken for the joke.) Weaknesses Reliant on constant solar radiation Kryptonite (severely weakens muscles, eliminates stored solar power) Magic (includes enhanced weapons) Spends more time protecting others than improving skills Boomstick: But remove all those pesky feelings about saving people and look out! They see Batman struggling to hang on to a powerful god-like being named Darkseid who effortlessly gets Batman off of him and throws him into the ground. Darkseid: Can't you see that it's hopeless? Suddenly, Superman flies towards him and punches him into the wall and grabs his throat. Superman: That man (Batman) won't quit as long as he can still draw a breath. None of my teammates will. Me? I got a different problem. Superman starts pummeling Darkseid against a wall which is slowly giving in with each punch. Darkseid is now punched out of the wall and is now outside. He slowly gets up and sees Superman walking towards him. Superman: I feel like I live in a world made of cardboard. Always taking constant care not to break something. To break someone. Never allowing myself to lose control or someone could die. Darkseid tries to punch him but Superman blocks it and counters with his own punch which sends him back even further. Superman: But you can take it, can't you big man? What we have he is a rare opportunity for me to cut loose and show you just how powerful I really am. Wiz: alright, the combatants are set, let's end this debate once and for all. Boomstick: It's time for a Death Battttlllleeee! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ On team Goku: Rainbow, Dash Pinkie Pie, Spike, Luna, Fluttershy. On team Superman: Twilight, Starlight, Rarity, Applejack, Shining Armor, Cadence, Celestia. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Death Battle Just an average day in Metropolis. Man: Look! It's a bird! Man 2: It's a plane! What they see is a plane with a damaged wing flying towards them. Man: It's gonna kill us! “Well that escalated quickly,” muttered Cadence. Everyone starts to panic and run away. Man 3: I hate Mondays! “So does a certain orange cat,” grinned Pinkie Pie. Superman flies in, then sees to the plane. Superman: *humming Superman theme* Don't worry, folks, this looks like a job for Super -- WHOA! The plane nearly hits a nearby window cleaner. “Watch it!” hissed out Twilight. Superman: I got it! I got it! (*Cues: Earth Music - Dragon Ball Z*) Then it switches to a news reporter, who talks about Superman's heroics. At the Kame House, Goku's friends are watching it on TV. News reporter: Earlier today, Superman heroically rescued Metropolis from disaster once again. The man of tomorrow saved a downed airliner which would've crashed- Krillin: Superman, huh? Wow, he looks really strong. Vegeta: What, that pretty boy ass clown? Oh please. I could kill him with my eyes closed... even faster than that stupid transforming hedgehog. “Glad to see the prince hasn't changed one bit,” remarked Luna with an amused look as the rest of the group chuckled at her comment. Chi-Chi: Just look at him... wearing his underwear on the outside. I bet it chafes... “I have to agree with her it does look uncomfortable,” muttered Rarity. Goku: Don't be so sure... Chi-Chi then looks out a window at Goku, who is outside looking at the water. (*Cues: Goku & Gohan In The Time Chamber - Dragon Ball Z*) Goku: I sense him. He's strong... stronger than anyone I've ever fought. Chi-Chi: Are your serious? Goku then happily picks up Chi-Chi. Goku: Finally... someone as strong as me! Vegeta: (off-screen) SCREW YOU!!! The group couldn't help but laugh at the Saiyan prince’s outburst. Goku holds up Chi-Chi while spinning in a circle as the two of them laugh. “Awwww~!” everyone said as they watched the heartwarming scene. Master Roshi: I heard he's an alien! Goku: An alien? Goku, shocked at the news, accidentally lets go of Chi-Chi, who flies off-screen. “Bye Chi-Chi~!” sang Pinkie Pie as the rest of the group looked in stunn silence as they saw Goku’s wife fly off screen. Goku: It's only a matter of time before he destroys the planet! “Umm Goku buddy I think you might have the wrong idea,” said a nervous Shining armor. Goku then gears up for battle. Goku: Nimbus! Goku then flies off on his Nimbus from his current location to Superman. (*Cues: Superman: The Movie - Prelude and Main Title March*) In Metropolis, Superman is standing on top of the Daily Planet when he hears the nimbus coming from a far distance. He then turns and sees Goku riding the Nimbus, who stops and turns to face him. Goku: Hey there. Superman: Uh... hello. Goku: You look pretty strong. Let's fight! “T-that’s one way to start a fight I guess,” muttered a dumbfounded Starlight. Superman: Fight? Well, that's not really what I do... (*Cues: Hand in Hand Fight - Dragon Ball Z: Budokai 2*) Goku then charges up a ki blast and fires it at Superman, who knocks it away. Superman then flies forward, knocking Goku off the Nimbus. Both then land onto the streets below. Goku: Oh boy! This is gonna to be fun! Superman: You're insane! “No… just really likes a good fight,” muttered Rainbow Dash. FIGHT! Goku flies forward and punches Superman, then proceeds to go on the offensive, forcing Superman to block his blows until Goku teleports behind him and kicks. Goku then jumps onto the side of a building and flies at Superman, who punches him so hard that he flies through multiple buildings. Superman then flies after him and delivers a fast combo on Goku, knocking him to the ground. Superman: You're outmatched! Give up! (*Cues: Goku Battles - Dragon Ball Z*) Goku then use his Kaio-Ken technique. Goku: Kaio-Ken! Superman: Kaio-what? (*grunts*) “HA! Classic,” laughed Pinkie Pie. Goku punches Superman into the air, flies after him, kicking him further back, then fires another ki blast, which nearly knocks Superman to the ground. Goku then lands to the ground and fires a large volley of ki blasts at Superman. Superman: Uh huh. “It’s kind of intimidating how unimpress he seems with Goku’s attack,” muttered Applejack. Superman uses his super-speed to evade all of them, then suddenly strikes Goku, stunning him. He then proceeds to deliver a large flurry of blows to the dazed Goku before his final strike sends Goku into a wall, paralyzed. (*Cues: Superman Returns - Chip Off Old Block*) Goku: Wha... what? I... I can't move... Superman: So... you're an alien too, huh? Goku: What did you do to me?! Superman: Pressure points. Didn't work at first, but my X-ray and Microscopic vision let me find your body's weak points. “That’s scary,” whispered Fluttershy. As Superman continues talking, Goku uses telekinesis to lift up a Senzu upward to his mouth from a pouch full of beans. “Hey aren't those…?” asked Spike. “SENZU BEANS!” yelled Pinkie Pie. Superman: You won't be going anywhere... what is that?! Goku then eats the Senzu bean, recovering him from his paralysis, then floats as he holds the bag in his hand. Goku: Ah... Senzu bean! Want one? Superman: No. (*Cues: Superman Returns - Drop In The Bucket*) Superman incinerates the bag with his heat vision. “Now that was just plain rude,” commented Cadence. Superman: I'm ending this... now! Superman flies towards Goku to punch him, but his punched is stopped by Goku's hand as he becomes Super Saiyan. Superman: What?! “You're in trouble now blue boy! Cheered Rainbow Dash Goku then unleashes a massive combo on Superman, eventually side kicks him far back. Superman: Okay Blondie! What's going on?! “Big trouble if you don’t finish the fight quickly,” said Celestia. Goku flies towards Superman, whose attack he anticipates, but when Superman strikes, Goku suddenly disappears. Realizing that Goku was behind him, Superman prepares another punch, but is interrupted by Goku's. Goku: I... am Son Goku! Goku punches Superman into the air. Goku: And I... Goku flies upward towards Superman. Goku: ...Am a Super Saiyan! Goku punches him downward, with Superman crashing back-first into the top of a building. Goku then prepares his Kamehameha Wave. (*Cues Goku's Super Saiyan theme*) Goku: Kame... Hame... Haaaaaa!!! “AWESOME!!!” cheered Rainbow Dash. Goku's Kamehameha Wave blasts through what turns out to be the LexCorp building, blowing it up. Afterwards, Superman still stands in the rubble unscathed. “T-that didn’t even leave a scratch on him,” stuttered out Luna in fear. Superman: Well... this might take a while... (*Cues: Superman Returns - Kryptonite*) Suddenly, Superman begins feeling weak, due to a piece of Kryptonite left over from the remains of LexCorp. “Of all the places for that stuff to be!” groaned out Shining Armor while his wife patted him on the shoulder. Superman: What? *groans in pain* No... not now... Goku flies in to attack, but then notices that something is wrong. Goku: Huh? Goku then lands to the ground. Goku: Hey, what are you doing? “Dying,” whimpered out Fluttershy, feeling bad for the man of steel. Superman: I... no... Goku: Is that rock hurting you? Superman: Kryp... tonite. *groans in pain* Goku then charges up a ki blast and then proceeds to fire it at the Kryptonite, destroying it. The group smiled at Goku for giving up an easy win to have a fair fight. Goku: There. Okay, let's go. Superman: What... why? Goku: I wanna beat you at your best. It's no fun if it's not fair. Superman: Gee, thank... In the middle of his thanks, Goku kicks Superman into the air. “HAHAHAHAHA!” laughed most of the group. Afterwards, Goku and Superman are clashing at super-fast speeds across the entire city. His final strike knocks Superman back and then Goku proceeds to leap forward using two buildings, knocking Superman towards the ground. (*Cues: DBZ Budokai 3 - Twist Of Fate*) Goku then charges at Superman on foot, using his After-Image Technique to create illusions of himself, who run in a circle around Superman. Unfazed, Superman walks forward and punches, knocking Goku back. The two then zip across the city, trying to catch each other, until Superman sneaks up on Goku, hitting him with a car. “Ouch!” winced Applejack. “I’d say that was game if it wasn't for the fact Goku has faced worst,” commented Starlight. Superman: Next time, watch your blind spot. Goku then goes Super Saiyan 2, destroying the car. Superman: Huh... déjà vu. Goku fires more ki blasts at Superman, who takes them out by using his heat vision. Both fly past each other as Superman uses his heat vision, managing to hit Goku's back. “It’s the unstoppable force vs. the immovable object with this two,” muttered Twilight in awe. (*Cues: Superman Returns - Rough Flight*) Superman then rips out a lamp post from the ground and hits Goku with it, knocking him into the air. Goku then takes out his power pole and sees the lamp post flying towards him. He swings the pole, knocking the lamp post away, then proceeds to fly towards Superman and unleash a combo on him utilizing it, knocking Superman back. Superman: That... feels... like... Goku: Power Pole extend! Superman is suddenly struck by the expanding power pole, which forces him into the side of a building. Goku then flies at him with a punch, knocking Superman through the building. Superman: *groans* Magic. “Go magic!” cheered the magic users in the room. Goku: The game's not as fun when you're losing, is it? Superman: Game? You think this is a GAME?! I haven't even begun to play. “Ok superman is getting scary now,” muttered Spike, not liking how angry the man of steel was getting. “Oh he just need a party to cheer him up,” suggested Pinkie Pie. Superman then flies into the air and flies off into the distance. Goku then focuses, anticipating where Superman will fly to, then uses Instant Transmission. (cue Hyperbolic Time Chamber theme) He arrives at a wasteland from the opposite side of the world, where he takes his Power Pole back out, then swings it downward while expanding its size, which hits the flying Superman, knocking him back. Goku then swings his extended Power Pole, which Superman catches with his hand. Superman then slams Goku into the ground with it, then throws the Power Pole far out of the atmosphere. Goku then transforms into Super Saiyan 3. “Oh dear sweet Celestia! That hair!” scream Rarity as soon as she laid eye’s on Goku’s new look. “Not the power pole!” criad Twilight, wanting to see more at the unique item. (*Cues: Buu Is Fighting - Dragon Ball Z*) Superman: Oh great. Not another... Superman is interrupted by a punch from Goku, who then delivers a flurry of kicks, and finishes by using his Dragon Throw, grabbing Superman by the legs. He spins, repeatedly knocking Superman into the ground, before throwing him, destroying an entire large rock formation. Superman then flies at Goku on the offensive, with Goku blocking a flurry of punches. Goku: (thinking) He can even keep up with Super Saiyan 3. What makes him so strong? “Years of writers doing whatever they want?” suggested Pinkie Pie. Goku teleports and places his hand on Superman's head, trying to read his mind. Superman: Attacking my mind, huh? He knocks Goku back, then strikes him a few times, knocking him into the air, finishing by knocking Goku to the ground, creating a crater. Goku sees Superman about to fly towards him. Goku: Solar Flare! The screen goes bright, but Superman is unfazed, holding Goku by the throat. Superman: My turn... “Nothing seems to faze him,” whispered a intimidade Celestia. Feeling completely outclass by both fighters. Superman creates a huge beam of heat vision, intending on ending the fight right there. But then a strange deformity begins occurring around him. Superman: I've got a bad feeling about this... The deformity then begins to conclude, ending with the day turning to night and Super Saiyan 4 Goku appearing before him as lightning strikes in the distance. Superman: Here we go again... Goku: It's over Superman! No one is stronger than Super Saiyan 4, my ultimate form! Superman: Ultimate form, huh? About time you ran out of hair styles... “Snrk! Ok I got to give the big blue boy scout this, that was good one,” snickered Rainbow Dash. Both begin floating upward, then finally fly towards each other. The two clash at unprecedented speeds before Goku does a two-leg kick, knocking Superman down. “This is getting crazy,” shouted Luna as she traid her hardest to keep up with the two fighters. “This puts as my fight with tirake to shame…” muttered Twilight as she now felt like a little filly compared to the two warriors in front of her. (*Cues: Super Namek Theme - Dragon Ball Z*) Superman then uses his freeze breath to try to halt Goku in his tracks, but Goku manages to make it through and delivers a few kicks that knock him into the ground. Instantaneously, Goku teleports towards Superman, then places his hand by Superman's face as he fires off a ki blast. Superman then begins to reach his limits. At this point the group where at the edge of their seats and those like Pinkie Pie and Rainbow Dash where going through snakes as they kept their full attention on the screen. (*Cues: Ginyu Transformation Theme - Dragon Ball Z*) Superman: Don't have much left in me. Have to get above those clouds... “That’s right! Because of the storm clouds caused by Super Saiyan 4 Superman has been cut off from his power source!” exclaim Twilight. “That means Goku has a chance!” cheered Spike and Pinkie Pie. Superman flies upward, intending to leave the planet for the sun. Goku sees this and chases him. “Go Superman!” shouted Team Superman hoping that the man of steel can get to past the clouds. Goku: Oh no you don't! “Nooo! Stop him Goku!” orders Rainbow Dash. Superman then exits the earth towards the sun as Goku flies upward while preparing a Kamehameha. Goku: Ka... me... Ha... me... Haaaaaaa!!! Goku fires his 10x Kamehameha, as Superman turns and fires a huge blast of heat vision towards him. The two beams are at a near-standstill. “Ha! Superman got’s this!” cheered Cadence. Goku: Kai… “... no,” muttered Twilight and Starlight. Goku: O… “No,no,no!” growled out Celestia and Shining armor. Goku: KEEEEN!!! “NONONONONONO BUUUCK!!!” screamed Luna as the rest of team Superman saw what was going to happen soon. Goku's Kamehameha Wave then overpowers the heat vision, pushing back Superman into the sun. Goku then reverts back to his normal form, exhausted. Goku: *breathes heavily* Phew. That's... it. Good... fight. As Goku prepares to fly back to Earth, he suddenly sense his opponent. (*Cues: Goku's Spirit Bomb - Dragon Ball Z*) Goku: *gasp* Wait... he's... there's no way... he's still alive! It's... it's the Sun. He's using the Sun. But I'm... I'm drained. “Oh no…” whispered Fluttershy as she held her Doomguy Plushie closer. Goku then raises his hands upward. Goku: Sun! Lend me your energy! As Goku is creating a Spirit Bomb, Superman is inside the sun, absorbing its energy. As Superman begins to exit the sun, Goku goes Super Saiyan and absorbs the Spirit Ball's energy. (*Cues: The Fortress Falls - Smallville*) Goku then uses this energy to create a large fiery beam of ki energy, which Superman flies towards. With his power near its maximum, Superman flies straight through the beam and slams Goku into the core of the planet. Goku then goes Super Saiyan 4 and flies towards Superman with one last attack. Goku: Dragon... FIST! “GO GOKU/SUPERMAN!!!”both teams screamed as they saw the the very planet itself fall apart before this two power houses. Superman then prepares his infinite mass punch as the two connect. The two opposing forces are so powerful that the entire Earth is obliterated in an instant. Goku shouts as he is destroyed by the Infinite Mass Punch as the screen goes white. Superman is shown floating in space, appearing lifeless. Then thanks to the sun's energy, Superman opens his eyes, having survived. K.O.! Superman flies away as Goku's boot is shown floating in space and its being over to next season. “... this is going to cause some flame wars,” muttered Pinkie Pie. Results (*Cues: Superman Theme (Metal Version)*) Boomstick: It’s over! It’s finally over! We never have to hear about it again! Wizard: Indeed. Superman may not be as tenacious as Goku, but sometimes, tenacity only prolongs the inevitable. Boomstick: Superman’s powers insane. He can even patch up holes in reality with just his own static electricity. “WHAT!?” screamed Twilight as soon as she was able to shake off the shock from the battle. Wizard: Goku did not understand Superman’s connection to the sun and would not think to teleport him to a red star. Even if he did figure it out, he would run the risk of teleporting him to a blue star, which actually increases Superman’s power. “Not like supes needed it anyway…” muttered Spike. Boomstick: And if Goku destroyed the sun, the supernova would blast all the way past Mars and incinerate him. “There was no real way to win,” muttered Rainbow Dash. Wizard: So it ultimately comes down to who is stronger, faster and tougher. STRENGTH Wizard: The force needed to move an object out of the sun’s orbit by 1% is about one thousand times less than the object’s mass. The Earth weighs in just under 6.6 sextillion tons. This means that Superman is strong enough to move 6.6 quintillion tons. Boomstick: But since his solar power can rise infinitely, this is nowhere near his maximum strength. Scientist: You’re lifting 200 quintillion tons. That’s three times your record. The group could only look in stun silence at the redicuise show of strength. SPEED Wizard: While being timed by Max Lord, Superman flew to the sun and back in less than two minutes. That’s 9.4 billion km/h. “Holy buck,” muttered a Rainbow Dash. Boomstick: Not to mention he was fighting Wonder Stripper the whole time. Rarity just gave a frustrated sigh at Boomstick’s nickname for Wonder Women. Wizard: True, so it’s likely he can go faster. According to Batman, he can fly at least 17 billion km/h. At this point Rainbow Dash had just decided to accept that she was no longer the fastest. Boomstick: And nobody argues with Batman! “Agreed!” Luna quickly Agreed. DURABILITY Boomstick: The Man of Steel can survive the impact of multiple supernovas, each with about ten octillion megatons of force. (*Cues: Yobi Samasa Re Ta Toshi - Dragon Ball Z: Burst Limit*) Wizard: So, Superman’s feats and skills are definitively measured. However, Goku’s are not and are difficult to judge. Not only does Dragonball heavily abuse cinematic time, but Goku’s final adventures in Dragonball GT are incredibly inconsistent due to his untimely transformation into a child. From the wish from Pilaf from the black-star dragonballs, accidentally turned Goku from an full-grown Saiyan to a Saiyan child. Goku: Wow, the room got a lot bigger somehow. “Is there anything this Dragon balls can’t do?” asked Starlight, wondering if this things had a limit. “Not sounding really inappropriate?” suggested Pinkie Pie. Wizard: As ki is dependent on the physical body, his child form likely could not handle his own ki, sending his power into flux. Goku: It can't take it. It's too weak. My older body was more developed. Boomstick: And obviously, we’re not using future Goku ‘cause that would require a ridiculous amount of assumptions. Not to mention we’d have to use future Superman, who’s pretty much God. So, like Superman, we need to judge Goku in his prime. “Makes sense,” agreed Twilight. Wizard: After experimenting with dozens of different theories, we discovered an iron-clad method to finding Goku’s limits, which we call the Gravity Formula, based around his training in increased gravity. Due to his style of training and Saiyan heritage, Goku increases his abilities proportionate to the amount of force he trains under. King Kai: Saiyans are born with the unique ability to fight anywhere. “This Saiyans were truly a powerful race,” complemented Luna with a large amount of respect in her eyes. Wizard: While in base form, Goku could lift just under 40 tons. This is equivalent to 586x normal Earth gravity, which we will use in the Gravity Formula along with the Super Saiyan multipliers to calculate Goku’s maximum potential. “Oh joy… more math,” muttered Rainbow Dash. “Oh joy Math!” cheered Twilight as she clapped her hooves in excitement. STRENGTH (*Cues: DB Raging Blast 1&2 - Ultimate Blast Soundtrack*) Boomstick: Multiplying the 40 tons by the Super Saiyan forms means he can lift up to 160,000 tons in Super Saiyan 4, strong enough to pick up a continent... or my ex-wife. Ha ha! “... dammit Boomstick,” muttered Rarity, getting real sick of his jokes. SPEED Boomstick: Right after Goku trained on King Kai’s planet, which has gravity 10x stronger than Earth's, he flew across Snake Way Road as fast as possible to save his friends. It took him 28 hours, impressive since that’s 1,000,000 kilometers long. “I’ll say!” said an impressed Rainbow Dash. Wizard: Except it’s filled with curves and Goku flew straight over it, so how far did he actually travel? By comparing Goku’s height to a single spike, we can measure each curve. We can then remove those curves from the overall length. So it turns out that Goku actually flew 307,000 kilometers, nearly 11,000 km/h. “That shatters every flying record in Equestria history,” muttered Celestia. Boomstick: To see how fast his base form is at the end of the series, we run the Snake Way number through the gravity formula to find that his top speed clocks in at over 2 1/2 billion km/h, over 2x the speed of light. DURABILITY (*Cue: Dangerous Mind - DBZ Ultimate Tenkaichi*) Wizard: We can determine Goku’s durability through this bomb, which the brilliant Dr. Gero designed to kill Goku at age 25, when his maximum potential was Kaio-Ken x4. Bulma: That was intended for Goku. Android 16: It was intended to be a last resort. “Talk about going out with a bang!” joked Pinkie Pie getting a few groans from her friends. Boomstick: Scans of the bomb display a TNT measurement of 657. “Bulma says the bomb could destroy the Earth, so this is likely measured in quadrillion megatons, since it takes at least 53 quadrillion megatons of force to destroy the Earth. Wizard: So in his final form, Goku can survive up to nearly 35 sextillion megatons. The group was yet again stun by this info. KI POWER Boomstick: Goku doesn’t rely solely on his physical abilities. He amplifies his strength and durability with ki. Wizard: But even though his ki reserves cannot be measured, we can determine his maximum output. See, his ki attacks do not force him backward unless he allows them to. Boomstick: Even when firing upward at full power, the ground beneath him remains untouched. Wizard: Therefore, according to physics, his maximum output is at most equal to the amount of force he can withstand. Boomstick: Luckily, we just calculated that with the Gero bomb. “My heads starting to hurt” muttered Spike. CONCLUSION (*Cues: Smallville Score - A Hall of Heroes*) Wizard: Alright, now that we’ve determined Goku’s maximum potential, let’s compare it to Superman’s. STRENGTH – Goku – 160,000 tons (w/o ki) – Superman - >6.6 quintillion tons SPEED – Goku – 2.5 billion k/ph – Superman - >9.4 billion k/ph DURABILITY – Goku – 34.7 sextillion MT – Superman - >10 octillion MT Boomstick: HOLY SHIT! Not even close. “It’s almost unfair!” shouted Twilight one of the few in the room to understand all the math and science used just now. Wizard: Now we can keep throwing feats and equations around, but in the end, numbers cannot measure what Goku and Superman are capable of. They are both ultimate heroes, solutions to daunting problems and achievers of the impossible. The difference is at the core of their character. Goku has never been invincible; he has very clear limits and must overcome those limits to solve the problems at hand. That’s the whole point. On the other hand, Superman’s story is not about the fight to become the best, but of an immigrant facing the challenge of home versus heritage. After accepting his alien side, Superman has reached his full potential, which under the endless power of the sun is essentially limitless. In short, “Superman is as strong as he needs to be.” [Superman Homepage] So what happens when you pit a man with the power to break any limits against another who has no limits in the first place? Well, only one has limits to give at all. “That was quite Deep Wizard,” said Celestia impressed. Boomstick: Goku just Kaio-can’t keep up with the Man of Steel. “And Boomstick had to ruin it with a pun,” remarked Luna with a deadpanned look. Wizard: The winner is Superman. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ END. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ “That ….was ….epic,” Rainbow said, after the credits rolled. “Those two were the toughest one we saw,” she said, rising in the air a bit. “That it was young Rainbow. I dare say that even myself and my sister would have trouble fighting those two,” Luna said, getting off the couch as everyone else made their way towards the glowing box. “Agreed sister, but I believe we should push those thoughts away and see what this box gave us,” Celestia said, standing in front of the box. “Yeah, let’s see what cool stuff we got,” Spike cheered from Twilight’s back. “I would like to know as well. If you don’t mind,” Fluttershy said, hugging Doomguy Plushie as his theme song came on. The royals gave the plushie a strange look as the song came on but shrugged a moment later. Twilight opened the box, expecting to see toys, comics or even a few gadgets. But all Twilight saw were just a bunch of thin wrapped things inside. Using her magic, Twilight lifted them out and saw that they all had a name on them. Giving each one to their respective owner, everyone looked at them curiously. “What are these things?” Rarity asked, inspecting her gift carefully. “Maybe it’s chocolate,” Pinkie said, grinning wildly. She started to rip off the wrapping paper wildly until she saw what it was and started to shake happily. “This is so super mega awesome cool,” she said, bouncing on her hind hooves. “What is it, Pinkie?” Twilight asked, gazing at her friend curiously. “Yes, what’s got you in such a happy mood?” Rarity asked, her eyebrow raising from her friend’s strange behavior. Well stranger than her normal behavior. Pinkie didn’t say anything but turned her thing around to show them. What they saw was a beautiful portrait of Pinkie is firing a happy White Bomberman out of her party cannon while munching on some pizza with Mikey. “Woah,” the younger members of the group said as the older ones looked impressed with it. Soon everyone was tearing off the wrapping of their respective packages and gazing at what was inside. “This is ...it’s beautiful,” Rarity said, showing everyone her own portrait. In Rarity’s portrait showed herself making a dress for Wonder Woman as she tried them on while Felicia played with Opal. “I need to find a spot to mount this.” “I reckon I need to do the same,” Applejack said, showing them the picture of her and Chun Li bucking and kicking apple trees while Mike Haggar catches the apples with two baskets. “I should show the family this.” “I really like this. It’s really nice,” Fluttershy said, as she look at her portrait of Doomguy is hugging her and his bunny while Pikachu rests on her head. “Whoa! Check this one out guys!” Spike yelled as he look at his portrait which had Yoshi and him are standing over a beaten, unconscious Shang Tsung, with Spike holding up his grapple-hook triumphantly. “A lot of thought must of went into this,” said Twilight as she looked at her portrait which had Spider-Man swinging through the city with Twilight and Harry Potter flying next to him. Shining Armor and Cadence smiled as soon as they saw their portrait which showed The two are standing atop a hill ready to battle, on Shining's side is Master Chief and Link, and on Cadence's side is Samus Aran and Rogue. Shining is wearing Master Chief's armor (minus the helmet) and holding Link's shield, Cadence is wearing Samus Aran's light suit (again, no mask). “I shall mount this on my wall poste haste!” declared Luna as she stared at her portrait, the portrait had Luna standing on the edge of a building overlooking the city in her Mare-Do-Well outfit (Unmasked). Next to her is Batman, Zelda (as Sheik), and Spawn. “I agree with you on that idea sister,” said Celestia as her Portrait had her is flying through space with Thor, Superman, and SS4 Goku. “It seems like Dash like her’s,” laughed Applejack as she saw the blue mare with a goofy smile on her blushing face as look at a portrait of Sonic and her floating above Starscream's destroyed remains in their Super and Rainbow forms. Giving each other a fist/hoof bump. It also had an autograph written on it. Don't look back, you've got no regrets, cause time won't wait for you, you choose to go your own way. Sincerely, Sonic the Hedgehog. PS: Congrats on the win, Dash! Remember, your story only ends when you stop running! “Awesome,” whispered a love struck Rainbow Dash as she stared at the portrait. (thank you Alphamon_Ouryuken for the gift ideas.) “So what did you get Starlight?” asked Twilight but she did not receive a response. Looking at her friend curiously, Twilight saw Starlight holding some paper in a magical aura while glaring at it. Being the curious mare, Twilight grabbed the paper and saw that it was a written letter for her silent friend. “Dear, Starlight. I hope you enjoyed the trip I planned for you as it took so long to make those twists and turns just right. That was a little punishment for trying to mess with time so don’t do it again. Have a nice day! With love Deadman,” Twilight said out loud, looking at Starlight nervously. “Are you okay, Starlight? If you want to talk we can….” Starlight looked up to the sky and screamed. “DEADMAN YOU NO GOOD MOTHER-!!!” ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ With the chaos duo. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ “DEADMAN YOU NO GOOD MOTHER(Twilight:Language!)!!!!!” Trepp looked up from his book and dryly said, “I’m guessing you have something to do with that.” Deadman finished taking a drink from a cup in his toes and said, “oh Trepp why would you think that?” “Oh I don’t know, maybe the sound of someone or something cursing your name?” Trepp asked sarcastically, rolling his eyes. “You really need to get a hobby.” “Oh come on! Deadman is a completely common name!” whined the fiery chaos god. “Besides I think we should talk about what to do now!” he proclaimed. “If this is about your idea about the Caboose Canon, then I’m not dealing with those two teams again,” Trepp said angrily, rubbing his arm. “That teal armored chick almost tore your legs off the last time we were there.” “She never returns my calls ether…” whimpered a sad Deadman. “If it’s talking to the egotistical pharaoh in that kid’s body then no,” Trepp said, his eyes hardening. “I’m not dealing with a children’s card game again.” “I miss my buddy Tristan,” commented Deadman. “And if you’re talking about that headmaster teddy bear and the bitch that gets a despair lady boner then FUCK NO,” Trepp yelled, his eyes twitching. “I’ll kill that bitch If I see her again, no matter how hot she looks.” “I wonder how my champion is doing ever since i blessed him with ultimate luck?” wondered Deadman. “Do you mean that ultimate bullshit guy?” Trepp asked, getting a headache just thinking about the white haired Hope freak. “He won half a million from me, the lucky bastard.” “HA! But no i was thinking before we send the second season of death battle I think we should send a little something to the human world…” said Deadman. “What do you want to send?” Trepp asked, preparing himself for the next idiotic idea coming from his ….friend’s mouth. “Well i was thinking of doi-!!” started Deadman but was interrupted by a bright flash of light that blinded the two beings of chaos and out from the light two beings that Trepp and Deadman hope to never run into emerged. “Their they are! There’s the two culprits,” A creature that looked like a miss match of animal parts put together said, pointing a claw at the two. “Yes Discord. I knew these two had to be behind this if you weren’t,” A tall fair skinned woman with gold jewerly said, glaring at the two. The woman was wearing a greek dress that looked to be made of rainbows just like her hair and her eyes changed colors every few seconds. This was Harmony. “To be fair, it was Deadman’s fault,” Trepp said, throwing his fellow chaos god under the bus. “Wow~! How about you just back up that bus up just to finish the job!” yelled an irate Deadman. “Oh he doesn’t have to,” Harmony calmy said, cracking her knuckles with a smile on her face. “I’ll be happy to do that. PERSONALLY.” “Well… Fuck.” the doomed Chaos god muttered. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ CHAPTER END! NEXT TIME HE-MAN VS. LION-O!.
He-man vs. Lion-O.As Celestia’s sun rose over the horizon, Applejack yawned as she pulled herself out of bed and made her way towards the orchard. Since it was Big Mac’s turn to make breakfast she decided to get a few minutes of apple-bucking in, it always helped her work up an appetite. Getting a running start, she galloped towards the nearest tree and turned around, giving it a hard buck, she took a moment to watch the fruits fall… only they weren’t the fruits she was expecting. “What in the hay?!” She shouted as pears rained down from the tree. Looking around, she realised that every single tree around her had pears instead of apples. “How in tarnation-” *SMACK* “-EYOOW!” The farmpony yelped as she felt something smack her rear. Turning around, she realized that somepony had placed a pear sticker over both her cutie marks! “Alright! Who’s the wise-guy who’s dumb enough tah-WOAH!!” She shouted as a certain rainbow-colored blur tackled her before she could react... [an hour later.] “Wait, where’s Applejack?” Twilight asked. Rainbow smirked deviously. “Oh, she’ll be along shortly...” As if on cue, Applejack stormed into the room with a less-than-pleased look on her face. And it was easy to see why; she was wearing a giant pear costume that only allowed her head, legs, and tail to poke out. Everyone in the room could only stare in shock while Rainbow, Spike and Pinkie burst out laughing. “So, like the new theme I picked for you... Pearjack?” Rainbow managed to say as she held Pinkie for support. Applejack glared at the cyan pegasus in rage. “SHUT. UP. RAINBOW. DASH.” “Aw, don't be so sour. Pearjack.” Pinkie giggled. “It's just a prank!” “Don't call me that!!” Applejack snapped before giving Rainbow Dash a dark glare. “Now give me the key!” Starlight gasped as she composed herself. “W-What key?” Applejack pointed to the back of her costume, which had some sort of lock embedded into it. “The reason Ah can't take it off it's because that stupid lock keeps it stuck on!” “Well… ok I'll fork over that key…” said Rainbow dash with a shrug. “Good-” the farm mare was about to say. “AFTER the battle!” stated Rainbow Dash with a grin “WHAT?!” the farm pony yelled. (thank ya Alphamon_Ouryuken) “Well… i guess we should start the next episode then,” commented Twilight as she pressed play. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Interlude (*Cues: Invader - Jim Johnston*) Wiz: Ahh, the glorious 80's. That odd era of big hair, keytars, and goofy muscular heroes of questionable sexual preference. “Oh~?” questioned Rarity with small blush dusting her cheeks after hearing the last part of Wiz’s speech. Boomstick: He-Man, master of the universe... “Those muscles,” muttered Applejack, trying to hide her blush. Wiz: And Lion-O, Lord of the Thundercats. “A kitty lord?” asked Fluttershy, looking at the screen in interest. Boomstick: He's Wiz and I'm Boomstick Wiz: And it's our job to analyze their weapons, armor, and skills to find out who would win a Death Battle. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ He-Man Prince Adam: Let's go, Cringer! He-Man and Battlecat are about to make an appearance. (*He-Man!*) “Did anyone else hear that?” asked a spooked Starlight. (*Cues: He-Man - Main Theme (Instrumental)*) Wiz: Prince Adam is the pathetic, bumbling son to the royal family of Eternia. (*He-Man runs into a lamp and crashes*) Boomstick/Rainbow Dash: Ha-ha, dumbass. Wiz: Then one day, a bird-clad sorceress gave him the secret powers of Castle Grayskull, transforming him into He-Man, the most powerful chip-n-dale in the universe. “What the hay is a Chip-n-Dale?” asked Applejack. Prince Adam: Fabulous secret powers were revealed to me the day I held aloft my magic sword and said, "By the power of Grayskull..." (*He-Man!*) He-Man: "I have the power!" The ponies and dragon watch as the young Prince Adam turn into the more powerful looking He-man. They almost didn’t recognize him if it wasn’t for them seeing the transformation and the hair. Background Alter ego: Prince Adam Height: 2.1 m / 6'11" Weight: 145 kg / 320 Ibs Descendent of King Grayskull Leader of the Heroic Warriors Trained by Man-At-Arms & Teela An excellent singer? Boomstick: Wait, wait, that's his origin story? He just thrust his sword up and down and yelled some random shit until he turned into a near-naked superhero? Wiz: Well, more like a cheap action figure. “I can see it.” commented Spike. “But what kind of a superhero name is He-Man?” Twilight asked in confusion. “It's like if somepony went around calling herself ‘Equine-Pony’, seems kinda redundant.” Boomstick: He-Man possesses herculean strength, speed, durability, and a super breath which can blow over most foes, and probably a few other things if you know what I'm saying. The girls blush knowing exactly what boomstick meant. Powers Herculean strength Super durability Super speed Super breath Can create a tornado Acrobatic (*Cues: He-Man & She-Ra Orchestral Melody - He-Man*) Wiz: The indestructible Power Sword is the conduit for his immutability, and has some unique powers of its own. Boomstick: Like any good sword, it deflects lasers and can also do a bunch of other random stuff, like magnetize special rings... “I need a sword like that…” Spike mumbled to himself. Imagining how cool he'd look wielding such a blade. Boomstick: ...or tie people up with magic S&M. “Oh, the things I’d do to Sunburst with that...” Starlight whispered to herself with a smile. “What?” Twilight asked. “Nothing!“ Starlight yelled with a strained smile Twilight casually moved away from her student. Wiz: And while he is skilled enough to throw his sword like a boomerang, he occasionally uses ranged gear, such as a grappling hook and bolas, to battle the evil of Skeletor. Boomstick: But I don't know where he's keeping those things. I mean he's practically much na-WOAH-HO-HO-HOA! Everyone in the room gawked upon seeing He-Man pull the bolas out of his… small, spandex shorts. “MY EYES!” Spike screamed as he covered his face while Applejack quickly covered Fluttershy’s eyes. “Oh… wow...” Twilight and Rarity blushed. “Oh my~ I wonder what else he keeps in there~” Starlight giggled while Rainbow and Pinkie tried their best to keep a straight face. Boomstick: You'd think he'd keep it in his battle harness made of Korodite, which, by the way, further multiplies his already insane strength by 10. “Wouldn't mind having something like that,” said Applejack. He-Man: That's what the sorceress fashioned this harness from. It helps add to my power. Arsenal Power Sword Indestructible Boomerang throw Deflects destructive rays Merged with Sword of the Ancients Other magical properties Bolas Grappling Hook Shield Korodite battle harness Multiplies his strength by 10 (*Cues: He-Man - Orko's Theme*) Wiz: Prince Adam is not the only one getting a power-up. He has an adopted cat, whom he saved from the jungle at a young age. “Awwww~!” said everyone as they saw a young Cringer. Boomstick: He named him Cringer 'cause... well... he's a little bitch. But whenever He-Man transforms, he zaps the little pussy, turning him into the ferocious Battle Cat. (*Battle Cat roar*) “AWESOME!” cheered Rainbow Dash. Wiz: Despite Cringer's reluctance and downright refusal to do so. Boomstick: He's kinda like the Michael Vick of cartoon heroes. Cringer: Oh no. My mother didn't raise any foolish children. That got a few laughs from the group. (*Cues: He-Man - Snake Mountain Theme*) Wiz: Granted, Battle Cat is a tremendous asset. He's so vicious it's implied that if he doesn't transform back into Cringer, he could go on an unstoppable rampage. After all, he is half tiger, half dragon. “Wait, WHAT?!” Starlight and Twilight exclaimed in shock. Fluttershy smiled, loving the possibility of such a hybrid existing. Maybe she could befriend it? “That is so cool!!” Spike and Rainbow shouted in awe. Boomstick & Pinkie(bouncing up and down): Gimme, gimme, gimme, gimme, gimme, gimme! Battle Cat Alter ego: Cringer Height: 1.5 m / 5' (on all fours) Weight: 226.8 kg / 500 Ibs Tiger/Dragon mixed breed Vicious & volatile He-Man-like abilities Super strength Super speed Roar can cause earthquakes (*Cues: Unknown Theme*) Wiz: He-Man has moved mountains, reversed a tornado, ran in circles fast enough to create a vacuum... Boomstick and Starlight: The fuck? Rainbow sighed. “Because EVERY superhero needs super-speed now...” “Like your boy-” Rarity began, only to notice the pegasus pull out a notebook. “...nevermind.” She quickly corrected herself, prompting Rainbow to put the book away without writing anything. Wiz: And dug to the center of the planet with nothing but a broken stalactite. Boomstick, Starlight, and Twilight: The DOUBLE fuck?! (*Cues Instrumental He-Man theme again*) Wiz: He even shattered Photanium, the strongest metal in his universe, when even his closest friends believed it would be too much for him. That really impressed the group, being able to break something that was considered impossible. Boomstick: And he traded blows with Superman... you know, that one guy who can lift entire planets and maybe killed your favorite person ever? That one. “Poor Goku….” muttered Fluttershy. “Still mighty impressive that He-man is able to stand his own with superman,” said Applejack getting a few nods from her friends in agreement. Feats Moved a mountain Lifted the city of Arcadia Reversed a tornado Can break photanium Has battled Superman Pushed a moon And many other seemingly impossible things Wiz: Well, he's not that strong, but he did manage to push a moon once... or twice. For a moment everyone could've sworn they heard Princess Luna scream out ‘blasphemy!’ in the distance. Wiz: But despite his miraculous strength, he is not invincible. Enough raw force can revert him back to the far more vulnerable state of Prince Adam. He also despises violence, preferring to outsmart opponents, and thus has much less physical combat experience than you'd think. “Well at least he’s a thinker and not just all brawn,” commented Twilight. Weaknesses May revert back to Adam from extreme force Power of Grayskull can be relinquished Lacks deadly ranged weaponry Limited experience with violence Boomstick: Still, he's pretty good at beating the everliving crap out of people, no matter what planet or series he's on. “Agreed.” said Spike. Wiz: That's right. The 1990s New Adventures of He-Man is technically the same He-Man we all know, giving him much more experience... Boomstick: Wait, wait, wait, what was that? (*Pauses footage*) Wiz: Shh, this is vital... Boomstick: No, no, no! Go back! Go back! Right there! “Whats got Boomy all ruffled up?” asked a confused Pinkie Pie. (*Rewinds back*) (*He-Man fixes broken chain… somehow*) He-Man: There you go, fella. Good as new. (*Cues: Run Orko - He-Man*) Boomstick: Whu-? Okay, so it's broken, I guess I'll just magic it back together! Wiz: The magic of the '80s, Boomstick. The magic of the '80s. “The 80’s sound wired…” muttered Rainbow Dash. Boomstick: Magic of lazy writing. “Sounds like what a few ponies say about this story,” snickered Pinkie Pie. ….Screw you. (*Grappling hook pulls down door*) He-Man: Next time, you might try knocking first. (*He-Man!*) ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ The group had to admit that no matter how… colorful He-Man was he had the best chances at winning so far. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Lion-O (*Cues: ThunderCats - Main Theme (Instrumental)*) (*Thundercats!*) Lion-O: Let's get this show on the road. Wiz: As a child, Lion-O barely escaped the destruction of his home planet Thundara. His father sent him to 3rd Earth with five Thundarian nobles to uphold the royal lineage. Starlight blinked. “Wait, that kinda sounds like…” “Superman!?” yelled everyone instantly seeing the similarities. Boomstick: You know, I'm really gettin' tired of people ripping off Superman. “Ugh, I know right?” Pinkie scoffed. Wiz: But the Kryptonian comparison stops there, as on route to 3rd Earth, a suspension capsule malfunctioned... or something, it's not really explained, caused his body to age ten years. Tygra: During that time, he grew in size, but he did not grow up. “He lost ten years of his life,” muttered Fluttershy feeling sad for the thunder cat. Lion-O: What's going on? (*bumps head on capsule door*) Boomstick: Aww, we missed the cute kitty stage! Shut up! Kittens are adorable! “I didn’t know Boomstick had a soft spot for cute things,” commented a surprised Rarity. (*Cues: ThunderCats - Orchestra Theme Medley*) Wiz: As the newly crowned Lord of the Thundercats, Lion-O is the leader of the group and commands all of cat-kind. Background Age: 13 years, physically 23 Height: 1.9 m / 6'4" Weight: 102.5 kg / 225 Ibs Species: Thunderian Lord of the ThunderCats Trained by ThunderCat nobles Has command over all cats Snarf: Lion-O has power over all cats! (*Cues: ThunderCats - ThunderTank*) Wiz: Against the evil forces of Mumm-ra, Lion-O was forced to mature on the battlefield. He is a quick learner, helped by his cat-like abilities and attributes. Boomstick: Which means he's got superhuman agility and senses. “That fits his cat heritage quit nicely,” said Rarity knowing a few things about cats from being an owner of one. Wiz: Right. For example, while a human's nose has five million odor-sensitive cells, a cat's has over 200 million. Cats can hear five times better, have panoramic vision, and use their whiskers like antenna to scan for trouble, meaning it's actually very unlikely for curiosity to kill a cat... unless they're distracted by bright shiny things. “(giggle) cats are so cute when they play with things,” giggled out Fluttershy. (*Cues: ThunderCats - Panthro*) Boomstick: Lion-O wears a manly sports bra and wrestling shorts and doesn't seem to own anything else. Guess someone forgot to pack, oh, you know, CLOTHES for the interplanetary trip! Rarity almost fainted at the thought of just wearing one piece of clothing and nothing else. (*Cheetara roar*) (*Cues: ThunderCats - Orchestra Theme Medley*) Boomstick: Wardrobe aside, he wields the Sword of Omens, a pocket-sized dagger, which transforms into an epic blade after the most badass battle cry ever. Lion-O: Thunder! Thunder! Thunder! Thundercats, ho! The group had to agree that was one of the coolest things they have ever heard, right up thier with the Kamehameha. (*Cues: ThunderCats - Tygra*) Boomstick: It's an extremely durable, double-edged blade that cuts through stone and steel with ease. He can fly, make force fields, and shoot over fifteen different kinds of beams. Lightning bolts, fire blasts, and even a tractor beam, which Lion-O can guide things with, which is great for when you're on the couch. (*Lion-O impression*) Sword of Omens... bring me snacks beyond snacks... and a beer! “Sigh... only boomstick would use an artifact like that for something so stupid…” muttered Twilight. “Sword of Omens... bring me gems beyond gems!” Spike called out in a mock Lion O voice. “And a cupcake!” Pinkie giggled. “Ok maybe not just him,” she admitted. “Oh like you wouldn't try the same thing.” Starlight smirked before styling her mane to match Twilight’s. “Sword of Omens... bring me books beyond books… and Celestia’s diary!” This earned a laugh from everyone while Twilight rolled her eyes and chuckled a bit. Sword of Omens Cuts through most material Extends immeasurably Can be summoned from a distance Flight Casts force fields Sword Beams Lightning, fire, or varied temperatures Laser + "guiding" beam Scattered explosive beams Many, many more (*Cues: ThunderCats - Orchestral Theme Medley*) Wiz: The sword's power stems from the gem housed in its hilt, the Eye of Thundera, a legendary jewel with limitless magical power, which its wielder can call upon even from a great distance, such as inside a black hole. “B-but a black hole’s gravitational pull is too strong for ANYTHING to escape, even light!” cried Twilight as she tried to fathom something being that powerful. Lion-O: Sword of Omens... come to my hand! Wiz: It is powerful enough to hold an entire planet together and can spy on people and events across space and time. Lion-O: Sword of Omens... give me sight beyond sight! “I can see Rainbow using it too,” Spike said, snickering. “And why would I use that?” Rainbow asked curiously. “To see your favorite hedgehog~,” Spike said as everyone chuckled. Rainbow pulled out her notebook and wrote in it furiously as Applejack said, “You know you walked into that one right sugarcube?” “Worth it,” Spike said, shrugging his shoulder before turning his attention back to the screen. The Eye of Thundera A separate, living entity Limitless magical power Grants super strength Alerts of relevant danger Source of ThunderCat life Sight-Beyond-Sight Surveys events across space & time Visual & audible Cosmic & magnetic fields can interfere “(whistle) I have a feeling that gem puts the elements to shame,” commented Starlight as she marveled at the powerful jewel. “I wonder what I'd taste like?” Spike mused to himself. “Probably very spicy…” (*Cues: ThunderCats - Main Theme (Casual)*) Boomstick: He wears the Claw Shield, an extremely durable claw... glove thing, with which in his first outing he effortlessly punched down a tree. Hey, that's just like how I catch squirrels for supper! “Not the cute squirrels!” cried Fluttershy. Wiz: The Claw Shield may be small, but it's proven effective against blades, blows, and lasers. As a bonus, it has four grappling hooks, a smoke screen, and functions as a neat little scabbard for the Sword of Omens. “Ah~ I love seeing something that is both functional and fashionable,” cooed Rarity as she admired the multi purpose tool. Boomstick: But the Claw Shield can't protect him from everything. “But it get’s the job done,” Stated AppleJack with a firm nod. Claw Shield Extremely durable shield 4 grappling hooks Claw-shot Smokescreen Highly reflective surface Claws can pierce stone Small, portable size Sheathes the Sword of Omens (*Cues: ThunderCats - Thundera*) Wiz: While Lion-O is certainly quite sophisticated for an oversized thirteen-year old man-kitten, he is still somewhat immature and hot-blooded. Also, both Lion-O and the Eye of Thundera share a common weakness to a glowing red rock called Thundrainium. Okay, I lied, there was one more Superman rip-off (Pinkie:YOU LIED TO ME!). While the Eye is one of the most powerful weapons ever conceived, it may also be his greatest weakness. Turns out it's the source of life for all Thundercats, so if it's destroyed, so is Lion-O... and his entire race. The group was shocked such a deadly weakness. Not only would having the gem destroyed kill Lion-O but also his own People would die as well! Boomstick: I know! I'll bring it into constant danger and get disarmed a lot! “Then he needs a new weapon!” yelled Spike. Weaknesses Thundrainium Very reliant on Eye Minimal education Somewhat immature & hot-blooded The Eye is the source of his life (*Cues: Thundercats - Orchestral Theme Medley*) Wiz: Still, Lion-O is stronger, smarter, and faster than any other Thundercat. He can pull down a spaceship attempting escape velocity and won a foot race against Cheetara, who can run 120 miles per hour. “Well at least he’s not that fast…” muttered Rainbow Dash. happy to see one fighter she could out race. Boomstick: Oh, and look... he fought Superman too. “How many heroes have fought the man of steel?” asked a confused Spike. “More than you think but less than what you hoped,” stated Pinkie Pie while wearing a weird looking gasmask. Wiz: He's tough enough to survive boiling water, the molten core of the planet, and even the... vacuum of space? Boomsticks: '80s magic, Wiz. '80s lazy-writin' magic. “Insert 80’s joke here,” said Pinkie Pie while in a fit of giggles. Feats Lifted & threw an Ancient Spirit of Evil Beat Panthro in strength Beat Cheetara in a 5 mile sprint Pulled an escaping starship down Survived the planet's core Survived the vacuum of space Held together a broken planet Lion-O: Sword of Omens... give me power beyond power! Ho! Wiz: Alright the combatants are set. Let's end this debate once and for all. Boomstick: It’s time for a Death Battle! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ The team was kind of torn on who to root for this time. Both fighter were goofy but also very endearing in their own way. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Death Battle (*Cues: Royal Family - He-Man and the Masters of the Universe*) In a forest, Prince Adam is talking to Cringer, who is hiding in a bush. Prince Adam: Okay, Cringer. Let's try this again. This time, no whining, okay? Cringer: Oh no. Not again. “Poor Cringer,” muttered Fluttershy, feeling bad for the dragon/cat hybrid. Prince Adam then takes out the Power Sword and transforms into He-Man. (*Cues: He-Man and the Masters of the Universe - Main Theme*) Prince Adam: By the power of Grayskull... (*He-Man!*) He-Man: I have the power! “Unlimited POWER!” cackled Pinkie Pie while wearing a black cloak. “Pinkie, did you take that cloak from my closet?” Rarity asked, glaring at her hyperactive friend. “Nope,” Pinkie said cheerfully. He-Man then uses his sword on the bush without looking, beginning Cringer's transformation. Cringer: The pain... (*Battle Cat roar which also sounds like he’s in pain.*) (*Cues: Mumm-Ra The Ever Living - ThunderCats*) Elsewhere in that same forest, Lion-O hears Battle Cat's pained roar, then takes the Sword of Omens out of the Claw Shield, preparing to transform the blade. (*Cues: ThunderCats - Sword of Omens*) Lion-O: That sounds like trouble. Thunder! Thunder! Thunder! Thundercats, ho! Lion-O then looks over at the Eye of Thundera to find out about the disturbance. Lion-O: Sword of Omens... give me sight beyond sight! (*Cues: Royal Family - He-Man and the Masters of the Universe*) He-Man then jumps onto the fully transformed Battle Cat. He-Man: Alright Battle Cat... let's go do something normally perceived as impossible. “And drive twilight crazy in the process,” snickered Spike. Lion-O: Stop right there! (*Cues ThunderCats (Instrumental)*) Lion-O then jumps out in front of He-Man and Battle Cat. Lion-O: You would mound that poor pussy like some kind of mule? You muscular fiend! Noble tiger, turn on your master! “I…. i have now words for that,” muttered Pinkie Pie. (HA! *whack!* OW DAMMIT HARMONY!”) (*Cues: ThunderCats - Danger Approaching*) He-Man is suddenly booted off by Battle Cat. He-Man: He must have control over animals. “He’s got some skill over cats like Fluttershy has with all animals,” stated Applejack causing said mare to blush from the sudden attention. He-Man then proceeds to punch Battle Cat high into the air. “Kitty NO!” cried Fluttershy as she saw Battle cat fly out of view. He-Man: That should keep you busy for a while. Lion-O: I am Lion-O, Lord of the Thundercats... and you will pay for your animal cruelty. “Oh god it’s like Goku vs Superman all over again,” muttered Twilight as she saw another fight start because of another misunderstanding. He-Man then takes out his sword. He-Man: I am He-Man. Back off, feline. You are clearly not equipped to... Lion-O then proceeds to take out the Sword of Omens which then extends to a longer blade. He-Man: Ohhhh~. “...did he really just…?” Rainbow gawked. “Mmmmhmhmhmhm….” Pinkie giggled perversely. “This is gonna be fun...” FIGHT! (*Cues: ThunderCats - Intro Theme (METAL)*) Lion-O fires a lightning blast at He-Man, who deflects it with his sword back at Lion-O, who blocks it. He-Man then picks up a boulder and throws it at Lion-O, who leaps at it and slashes through it with his blade, then clashes with He-Man's sword. He-Man knocks Lion-O away, then leaps towards him as the two begin to duel. Lion-O tries using fast side-swipe slashes on He-Man, but he blocks all of them, with the last move knocking the Sword of Omens away from Lion-O. “The big guy gots some fancy moves!” commented a impressed Rainbow Dash. He-Man: Surrender. You are defenseless. Lion-O: I've got plenty of tricks left. Lion-O then uses his Claw Shield's smoke screen, allowing him to escape. “Clever girl…” muttered Pinkie Pie while wearing a hunter's hat. (*Cues: ThunderCats - Curiosity*) He-Man: *coughs* Have to... clear this. *exhales* He-Man uses his super breath to clear away the smoke screen. He-Man: There... now where did he go? Lion-O hides from He-Man behind a tree. Lion-O *whisper*: Sword of Omens... come to me. He-Man: I heard that. “Ok that’s creepy,” said Spike. (*Cues: He-Man and the Masters of the Universe Theme again*) He-Man then runs up to the tree and obliterates it with a single punch. “DANG! I know he has super strength but it’s still crazy seeing somepony obliterate a tree with one punch,” said an amazed AppleJack. (*He-Man!*) The Sword of Omens then flies past He-Man and returns to Lion-O, who then proceeds to fire more lightning. Lion-O: Ho! He-Man once again deflects the blasts with his sword, then throws his sword towards Lion-O, who ducks it, and sees that it is about to return to He-Man. (*Cues: Mumm-Ra The Ever Living - ThunderCats*) Lion-O: Not so fast... Lion-O uses the tractor beam to plunge the Power Sword into the ground, then uses his Claw Shield to fire his four ropes at He-Man, ensnaring him. (*Cues: Imminent Danger - ThunderCats*) Lion-O: Want to keep going? Looks like you're a bit tied up at the moment. “Ohhh,” Twilight groaned. He-Man: *groans* Sorry, cat man, but you won't string me along that easily. “He really said that?” Starlight asked, massaging her head. He-Man then breaks through the ropes by flexing his muscle. “Mmm~ momma likes,” purred out Rarity as she admired the gun show that He-man was freely showing off. (*He-Man!*) (*Cues: ThunderCats - Mutants Battle*) Lion-O fires more lightning at He-Man, who avoids all of the blasts. He-Man: A whirlwind should blow him off course. “Boo!” booed Rainbow Dash as she found that pun really cheesy. He-Man then runs around in a circle multiple times, creating a tornado that quickly moves towards Lion-O, who is sucked into it. Lion-O: I... think... I've... got a... hairball. (*groans*) “... ew” muttered everyone. Lion-O is eventually thrown out of the tornado and then lunges towards He-Man, who runs towards his sword. Just after He-Man had retrieved the Power Sword, he is slashed by Lion-O, who then runs back towards him. Lion-O: Feel the power of Thundera! Lion-O then uses his sword to blast He-Man with a beam, which knocks him far back. Lion-O: Now to finish you off! Wait... where did you go? Lion-O looks back at the Eye of Thundera for the answer. Lion-O: Sword of Omens... give me sight beyond sight. “Oh boy! The crazy things i would do with that power,” said Pinkie Pie getting a shudder from her friends. (*Cues: ThunderCats - The Eye of Thundera*) He is suddenly shown a faraway mountain. Lion-O: Hmm... a mountain? Why show me this? Suddenly, the mountain is shown to be lifted upward. “That… is… AWESOME!” cheered Rainbow Dash. Lion-O: Wait a minute... that's... impossible... “Not for He-man!” cheered Pinkie Pie. (*Cues: Masters of the Universe - Orchestral Redux*) Without warning, the entire mountain is flung up into the air towards Lion-O. (*He-Man!*) (*Cues: Thundercats - Orchestral Theme Medley*) Lion-O: By Thundera! Sword of Omens... give me power beyond power! With this, Lion-O fires a beam from the Sword of Omens at the incoming mountain, causing it to disintegrate. Afterward, He-Man comes running towards Lion-O, then punches him. “Hiss! Ooooh~!” hiss out the group at seeing He-man sucker punch Lion-O. (*Cues: He-Man and the Masters of the Universe Theme again*) (*He-Man!*) Lion-O is somewhat dazed by this punch as He-Man runs by and punches him again, also dazing him. He-Man then comes lunging with his sword, but Lion-O erects a shield around him, which He-Man breaks after a few swings of his sword, shattering the shield. Lion-O then makes the Sword of Omen's blade extend, stabbing He-Man. (*Cues: He-Man Theme Instrumental*) Lion-O: Time for the climactic finale! “OK, now they're just doing that on purpose!” Twilight groaned. The rest of the group couldn't help but laugh at their friend’s frustration. He-Man then punches the Sword of Omens, which, in slow motion, shows the bending of the sword traveling towards the handle, completely shattering it and leaving the Eye of Thundera to fall onto the ground. Lion-O stands with his hand over his face, completely blown away by what has happened. “Holy cow! Yelled a surprised Spike as he saw He-man effortlessly destroy the sword of omen. Lion-O: That's not possible! “It’s kind of his thing to do the impossible,” Rainbow Dash commented dryly. He-Man then leaps down at Lion-O, greatly wounding him. The group winced at the sudden but brutal defeat that Lion-O was dealt with. He-Man: Ha-ha! You are finished! Lion-O: (*groans in pain*) He-Man then notices the Eye of Thundera floating upward. “Uhhhh…” muttered out Starlight as the left of the group was wondering wha He-Man: That gem... it's looking at me... “It’s kind of creepy…” muttered Pinkie Pie. (*Cues: Unknown Theme*) Without warning, the Eye of Thundera fires a large beam of energy, which even He-Man can barely withstand, as he slowly moves towards the gem and then manages to grab it with both hands. He-Man: Grayskull... give me the strength of the castle's secrets! “But will it be enough?” muttered Fluttershy. And with that, He-Man shatters the Eye of Thundera, killing Lion-O. He then crouches down towards Lion-O. He-Man: Well... looks like curiosity killed this cat. “... not cool,” muttered Rainbow Dash. Suddenly, Battle Cat finally falls back down. He-Man simply laughs. “Dang! That boy was in the air for like 4 minutes!" marveld AppleJack. K.O.! He-Man then continues laughing while Battle Cat chews on Lion-O. Results (*Cues: Masters of the Universe - Orchestral Redux*) Boomstick: What a crushing defeat. Wiz: While He-Man had little trouble overpowering Lion-O's physique, the Eye of Thundara is easily the most dangerous weapon He-Man has ever faced; more than capable of obliterating him if given the chance. Boomstick: Not only can the Power Sword deflect all Lion-O's main attacks, it's obvious He-Man is strong enough to break the Sword of Omens, just like how the super-strong and... horribly named Tug Mug broke it in the ThunderCats show. Wiz: A moon was approximately 70 quintillion metric tons. The highest official amount a human being has ever lifted without support is over 260 kilograms. Even after excluding the Kordite battle harness, He-Man is 10 quadrillion times stronger than the strongest man on Earth. “Not as strong as superman but still impressive,” complemented Starlight impressed. Boomstick: See, and you guys all thought you'd never see He-Man pound a pussy. “Damn it Boomstick!” screamed Rarity with blazing red cheeks. “HA!” laughed Pinkie Pie. Wiz: The winner is He-Man. (*He-Man!*) He-Man: Remember kids, it is very important to always get your pets spayed and neutered... otherwise it may lead to unstable behavior and unauthorized breeding. Battle Cat: Rawr, I miss my balls. “Poor Cringer…” whimpered Fluttershy. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ “Quick, to the box,” Spike said, jumping onto Twilight’s back. Rolling her eyes but smiling slightly, Twilight walked over to glowing box as Pinkie opened it. “What did we get this time, Pinkie?” Twilight asked as her pink friend dived into the box. A moment later, Pinkie stuck her head out and said, “We got toys this time” while pulling out a few action figures. “Sweet,” Spike said, getting off Twilight’s back and running towards the box. “Is there anything else?” Rainbow and Rarity asked at the same time. Pinkie’s head goes back into the box but reemerges a second later and says, “Nope. Just toys.” The rest of the girls accepted it and took a couple of them as everypony left the castle. Rainbow flew to the nearest cloud and began to relax, thinking about the next Death Battle and many more to come. It didn’t take her long to get comfortable enough to fall asleep there as she dreamed of running with a few of the speediest characters from Death Battle. She was just about to catch up to her favorite blue hedgehog when something hit. Waking up from her dream, Rainbow looked around to see that she was near Sweet Apple Acres and that Applejack was throwing apples at her. Flying to her farmer friend, Rainbow landed in front her and asked, “What’s the big idea, AJ?” “All right, the battle is over. You've had your fun, know give me the darn key!” Applejack demanded. Rainbow giggled. “Sure thing, just look under your hat!” And with that she flew off. Applejack’s eye twitched as she slowly took off her hat… and taped to the inside was none other than the key to the lock. She stared at the inside of her hat for a full minute, complete and utter rage building up within her to the point where she didn't even notice for a little sister approaching her. “Hey sis! We finally got all the pears down!” Applebloom smiled, only to notice her sister's enraged look. “Uh… sis? What's wrong-” “SON OF A-” (Two hours of angry swearing later) “So… can y'all tell me what all those words meant?” Applebloom asked her big brother as they ate dinner. “Eeenope.” Big Mac replied firmly. “Aww…” whined the little filly. “And have yah learned yer lesson about watching yer mouth in front of yer little sister?” Granny Smith asked angrily. In the corner of the room was Applejack, who was sitting on a stool with a sign hanging on the wall next to her that read "timeout corner"… with a bar of soap in her mouth. “MmmHmm…” She grumbled. (And so ends another day with our Heroes, but while they go about their day something else was happening of great importance and that could decide the fate of the world…) “Ow!ow!ow!ow!ow!ow! FUCKING OW BITCH!” screamed Deadman as Harmony was on his back, bending his legs backwards. “WHAT WAS THAT?” Harmony yelled, twisting Deadman’s ankles. “AHHHHH! Trepp, Discord help!” screamed Deadman but as soon as he looked towards his fellow chaos gods for help all he saw was the two looking at something in great interest. “Play the one with the keyboard again,” Trepp said said to Discord, with his back turned as the two were on a laptop. “What are you guys… WAIT YOU TWO ARE WATCHING CAT VIDEOS AGAIN AREN'T YOU!?” screamed the fiery god in anger, but only got a deadpanned look from Trepp as his answer. “... Just play the video, he’s just gonna yell at us anyways,” Trepp said, getting a nod from Discord who played another video of a cat playing the keyboard. “SON OF A BITCH!” screamed deadman in pain as Harmony continued his punishment. “Ok, I think that enough Harmony,” said a voice. Everyone turned to see a knight in black and gold armor with white trimming and a cape just standing there. “Hello Alpha,” Trepp said respectfully. “Hello Trepp, Discord, Harmony and Deadman,” the now named Alpha said, floating towards the group. “So what are you doing here?” asked the Goddess as she put more pressure onto Deadman’s legs getting a scream from said mad god as a result. “It was voted that I should make sure that you don’t destroy Deadman here,” Alpha said, getting between the two of them. “You’re defending him?” Harmony asked in disbelief. “OH THANK YOU,” Deadman said, trying to get up despite the pain he was feeling. Alpha shook his head and said, “I’m not defending him. I’m just here to make sure that nothing upsets the order of the universe.” “But this moron has already done that,” Harmony said, pointing at the chaos god. “That maybe true but he’s still doing his job to bring change to the world and not upset the balance. Like a certain chaos god we know,” Alpha said, glancing at the innocently whistling draconius. “But… But,” Harmony tried to say. “But nothing, Harmony. He’s still doing his job and you can only punish him if he goes out of his way to destroy your world,” Alpha said, not backing down. Harmony stared at the knight for a moment before sighing and said, “Very well Alpha.” “Now then, I believe we should all discuss on what to do next,” declared Alpha as the rest of the godly group gathered to discuss on what to do next. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ CHAPTER END! NEXT TIME M.BISON VS. SHAO-KAHN!
Shao Kahn vs. M. Bison.It was a new day For Twilight and her friends as they prepared for the next episode. They all felt a little uneasy with the trailer they saw yesterday but decided to pay it no mind. They were getting the snack table ready as they took a seat. “Well let’s get this episode started,” Twilight said, grabbing the remote with her magic. Before she could press play, a bright light engulfs the room causing everyone to close their eyes. “Ow,” a familiar refined voice said. “What hit me?” “Get off of me this instant,” an old voice yelled. “Why am I in this infernal contraption?” a dual sounding voice hissed. “Ow, where are we?” a bubbly voiced asked. “Maybe if you get off of me then we could find out, you taco brained simpleton,” A brash voice growled. “Girls, be quiet. I'm trying to figure out what just happened,” A seductive voice said. “I would like to know why’re you all on top of me,” a regal male voice yelled. As the light died down, the seven ponies and one dragon see a strange sight in front of them. They could see Discord, Chrysalis, Tirek and three unknown ponies on top of Sombra. “Sombra, Discord?” the eight friends said, confused by the turn of events. The two looked at the ones that called their names as Discord said, “Wasn’t expecting this.” “Neither was I. Now can somepony help me up, I'm feeling my back getting crushed,” Sombra said, trying to pull himself out of the pile. Discord floats into the air and snaps his fingers causing Sombra to disappear and reappear next to Rarity. Sombra looked at Discord and said, “My thanks.” “Okay, now can someone tell me what’s going on and why Tirek and Chrysalis are here,” Rainbow yelled, getting ready to fight as the ones in the pile were untangling themselves. Before anyone could do anything, the box near the Tv glowed and an envelope flew out of it. Twilight used her magic to grab the envelope and opened it. “What does it say, darling?” Rarity asked, not taking her eyes off their two enemies and the three unknown ponies. Twilight cleared her throat and said, “Dear Princess Reads-a-lot. For this episode, i brought some of the beings that you and your friends fought to watch this episode. Don't worry i made sure that they can't cause any trouble, so enjoy the episode. From your loving friend, Deadman.” After Twilight said that name, Starlight started to twitch while Discord was frowning. “So we have Chrysalis and Tirek here but who're those three?” Applejack asked, pointing to the three unknown ponies as Discord snapped his fingers, trapping them in a cage. Everyone looked at the three to see if there was any distinguished features. They stood side by side as a pegasus with cerulean fur and blue mane in a ponytail looked all over the place in wonder. The earth pony with pinkish fur and a purple mane in twintail fashion looked at everyone in annoyance. The last one of the group was a unicorn with yellow fur and a golden looking bush of a mane. This one looked around the castle in interest at their current situation. “I don’t know but they do look familiar,” Twilight said, trying to see if she knew them from somewhere. “Come now, Twilight. How could you forget us,” the unicorn said in a mock hurt tone. “Yeah, it hasn't been that long since the Battle of the Bands,” the pegasus said causing Twilight’s eyes to widen. “Hasn't been that long since you destroyed our gems,” the earth pony said annoyed. Twilight gasped and said, “The Dazzlings? But why do you look like that? Shouldn't you look more fish like?” “It’s mostly because of our shattered gems. Since they're destroyed, we can't stay in our natural forms. That's why we're in these forms,” the unicorn, Adagio, said nonchalantly. “Now can you tell us why we're here?” “Well according to this letter, you've been summoned here to watch Death Battle with us,” Twilight said, leading them to the couches. “Death Battle? What's that?” the pegasus, Sonata, asked while following her former enemy. “Just watch with us,” Twilight said, taking a seat. The earth pony, Aria, shrugged her shoulders and said, “Not we have anything better to do. Sunset and her friends seem to be watching a show as well.” The others all took a seat as Spike grabbed the remote and pressed play. Interlude (*Cues: Invader-Jim Johnston*) Wiz: The final boss: a nightmarish foe meant to test your skill to the fullest. Most of the former villains perked up at this while the others looked at them carefully. Boomstick: And sometimes they're just plain cheap, like Shao Kahn The Konqueror... “Now that's a title for a ruler.” Tirek smirked Wiz: ...or Master Bison of Shadaloo. “Guess he has a country or something,” Sonata said, munching on some popcorn. Boomstick: He's Wiz and I'm Boomstick. Wiz: And it's our job to analyze their weapons, armor, and skills to find out who would win a DEATH BATTLE. “This could be interesting,” Adagio said, looking at the screen with a slight smile. Tirek didn't say it but he agreed with the former siren as did Chrysalis. Shao Kahn (*Cues: Soul Chamber - Mortal Kombat 9*) Boomstick: Shao Kahn is the evil ruler of Outworld, conqueror of worlds, and owner of one of the most badass voices ever. Excluding yours truly of course. Shao Kahn: Ah, Too easy. “We heard better,” everyone said at the same time. (*Cues: Main Menu - Mortal Kombat 9*) Background Full Name: Emperor Shao Kahn the Konqueror Age: Over 10,000 years Height: 218 cm / 7'2" Weight: 181 kg / 400 Ibs Occupation: Emperor of Outworld Former ambassador of Elder Gods Fighting styles: Tai Tsu, Lui He Wiz: Though it didn't start out that way. Oddly enough in a manner similar to Raiden's assignment to Earth, the Elder Gods personally selected Kahn to protect the rather bleak realm of Outworld. That surprised the group that knew about Raiden, and where wondering why someone the elder gods chose would turn evil. Boomstick: Uh, turns out it didn't really need protecting. “No kidding,” Rainbow deadpanned, looking at the bleak land of Ourworld. “It almost reminds me of my former home,” Tirek said, remembering his home. Wiz: Shao Kahn became the chief advisor to Outworld´s ancient ruler the Dragon King Onaga. Together they began a war spanning the multiverse, conquering the other realms of existence one by one. “I had the same planes as well before scorpan betrayed me,” muttered Tirek as he remembered his younger brother and all the planes he had for the both of them. Boomstick: Good choice on that one, gods. And why did they even think this guy needed a bodyguard? “Better question, why didn't the Gods send someone stronger to keep them both in line?” Twilight asked, irritated that the Gods didn't even bat an eye at Outworld’s obvious plight. (*Cues: Shao Kahn's Throne Room - Mortal Kombat 9*) Wiz: But Kahn does not like sharing power, and soon poisoned Onaga, taking the emperor´s throne as his own. Kahn: Mwhahahaha! “That cold-hearted, back-stabbin’, no-good varmint!!” Applejack shouted, enraged that he’d pull such an underhanded stunt just to gain more power. “Ah yes, gain his trust and then backstab him at his most vulnerable point.” Chuckled Tirek, giving Discord a smug look. “It worked so well on you, didn’t it?” Discord simply threw a pie at his face without looking. Aria scowled before glancing at Adagio, while she hated Adagio’s bossy attitude, she’d never go THAT far in taking over the group. Boomstick: He now rules Outworld with an iron fist, and a giant maul: the Wrath Hammer. He can summon this monstrous sledgehammer out of thin air to finish foes in seconds, or decimate whack-a-mole records! The idea of Shao Kahn playing whack-a-mole made everyone laugh except Tirek and Chrysalis. Tirek was eyeing the hammer and wondering if something like that could've helped him. Arsenal Wrath Hammer Can be summoned from thin air Far larger than real mauls Requires superhuman strength to wield Sometimes used as throwing weapon Sword of Shao Kahn Only seen in that crappy TV show “There was a tv show?” asked Rainbow Dash. “Something best left forgotten,” muttered Pinkie Pie with Discord nodding in agreement. Wiz: He is a master of the dark arts, and often uses his magic to enhance his lethal attacks or create energy constructs of weapons, just as deadly as the real thing. He has even used his sorcery to manipulate and erase the minds of others. The sirens looked at his abilities in great interest as they watched this titan plow through his opponents. Sorcery Minor telekinesis Brainwashing Teleportation Can summon weapons Creates energy weapons Soul manipulation Boomstick: It's like magic Vegas “Ahh~ Vegas, so many fond memories,” sighed the Sirens as they remember feeding on so much negative emotion in just one casino. Wiz: He can also access his inner beast to transform into...this thing... (Movie Shao Kahn transforms into a very poorly CGd multi-headed dragon) “What. the. fuck?” Adagio gawked at the atrocity she was seeing. “I don’t want to see that anymore,” Sonata whimpered as she hid behind a green looking Aria. “OK, EW.” Sombra shivered, covering his eyes. “That’s disturbing even by MY standards.” Chrysalis said, visibly sickened by the grotesque display. “KILL IT WITH FIRE!” shouted Tirek. “Is it wrong i agree with them?” asked Rainbow Dash to her friends who could only shrug in response. Boomstick: Quick! Make me forget that shit! Wiz: Right, never happened! “Oh thank god,” sighed the sirens in relief. (*Cues: The Tower - Motral Kombat 9*) Wiz: Now, despite living in a completely separate dimension, Shao Kahn is well versed in two variants of Chinese Kung Fu: Tai Tzu and Liu He, which generally focus on powerful strikes and solid defense. “So he’s a walking fortress,” commented Rarity. “(scoff) more like a tank,” muttered Aria. Boomstick: He mixes these arts with his magic for a move set that´s all about absolutely obliterating his opponent. He rams people with charging spikes, and even shoots fireballs from his mouth, and laser beams from his eyes. “Laser beams!?” shouted out an excited Spike thinking how cool it would be to shoot lazers from his eyes. Wiz: And if his foe gets the upper hand, he can deflect any kind of projectiles back with his mystical Emperor´s Shield. “Would have been useful in our fight,” Tirek said, glare at the purple princess who stuck her tongue out. Move Set Charging Spikes Upward Shoulder Light Spear Explosive Ball Mystic Choke Emperor's Shield Eye Beams Soulnado Boomstick: And of course he always finishes his fights with a brutal fatality and an epic one-liner. The screen then changed to display Shao Kahn standing next to a familiar face. “Is that… Kratos?” Rainbow asked, surprised to see the previous Death Battle contestant again. Shao Kahn laughed, then proceeded to jab his hands into the middle of Kratos’ torso and slowly ripped his body in half right down the middle. Shao Kahn: Is that your best? Everyone stared at the display in shock and horror. “I… I think I’m gonna be sick...” Starlight whispered as she turned green. Fluttershy immediately fainted. Rarity quickly pulled out fainting couch for her to rest on. “Woo-ho-ho! Brutal!” Chrysalis cheered. “I agree, it’s quite impressive.” Tirek commented. “I takes a lot of raw power to rip someone apart so effortlessly like that...” “Guy's got style,” Aria simply said, enjoying the carnage. (*Cues: The Graveyard - Mortal Kombat 9*) Boomstick: He's A living tank, bulldozing down anyone dumb enough to get in his way. He's taken deadly blows time and time again and keeps getting back up, more pissed off than anything else. Wiz: But while his tenacity may be his biggest strength, his arrogance is easily his biggest weakness. Shao Kahn: You will die- (Liu Kang kicks him in the face) The group of heroes laughed at that. “Typical villains, always running their mouths before they’ve won.” Spike chuckled. Said typical villains that were in the room looked away in embarrassment knowing that the young drake was telling the truth. (*Cues: The Temple - Mortal Kombat 9*) Wiz: His endurance and longevity stems from his ability to steal the souls of others. Devouring a soul grants him longer life and the inherited power attributed to the victim. He is not a perfect conqueror, as he is restricted to the rules set by the Elder Gods. In order to invade a realm, Kahn´s chosen warriors must defeat the defenders ten times in a row in the form of a tournament of Mortal Kombat, held every fifty years; which he was doing pretty well, until he came to Earth. “Earth always seems to be a dead end for villains,” laughed Rainbow Dash getting a glare from Adagio and Aria both knowing the pains of being living in said dead end of a world. Boomstick: But even after losing the battle for Earth he just outsmarted the Elder Gods and eventually outlasted every other combatant to achieve the power of Armageddon...until Raiden reversed time cause he's a sore loser. “Bah! You heroes always pull something like that when you're about to lose,” scoffed Tirek in annoyance. Getting a nod from chrysalis. “That or get last minute help from annoying bacon haired singers…” muttered Adagio getting some strange glances from most of the group, a glare from Twilight, and an amused one from Aria. “But didn't you say one time that you wouldn't mind taking Sunset to broom closet and ro-!” asked Sonata before she was interrupted by a blushing Adagio placing a hoof against her mouth and giving her a heated stare. WIz: But his proudest accomplishment is his takeover of Edenia, the most powerful and respected realm of all. And as trophies for this victory, Kahn took Edenian’s queen and princess, as his own wife and daughter. “That’s horrible,” Fluttershy said, hugging Doomguy plushie to her chest. Boomstick: Hehe, nice! “We would have done the same,” Sonata said, thinking of having a boy serve her tacos. “More like have a cook,” Aria quietly said. “We should talk to Rarity about getting outfits like those two,” Adagio said, remembering the details of the humans outfits. Those outfits seemed to fit her style if she ever got one in her color. Shao Kahn: I am Shao Kahn! Conqueror of Worlds! You will taste no victory. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ While the main group and one redeemed Sombra and Discord found Shao Kahn to be a brute and a monster, the rest of the group thought he was a impressive ruler and deserved the title of conqueror. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ M. Bison (*Cues: Unknown Theme*) Wiz: M. Bison is the psychopathic founder and leader of the Shadaloo criminal regime. He is extremely wealthy, socially powerful, and public enemy number one of the Allied Nations. Boomstick: Oh, so the M means Master. “I would of never would've guessed,” mocked Rarity. “Really Rarity? Wow i guess you're not as smart as i thought,” said Pinkie Pie completely missing Rarity’s sarcasm. Background Full Name: Unknown Age: 59 years Height: 180 cm / 5'11" Weight: 70 kg / 154 Ibs Occupation: Dictator Fighting style: Shadaloo-ISM Raised by gypsies Trained in Soul Power Wiz: Well, yes and no. In Japan, M. Bison is really named Vega. Our Vega's name is actually Balrog. And Balrog the Boxer goes by the full name of Mike Bison. “That seems confusing,” Rarity said, wrapping her head around the names. “They probably have a good reason for the name changes,” Applejack said, rolling her eyes. Boomstick: I get it! Like Mike Tyson! Why was that a big enough deal to change all the names to... (The screen shows the year 1991. which the same year Street Fighter II released overseas, and Mike arrested for a scandal he did…) That caused quite a few members of the group to wince and the rest to look away from the screen awkwardly. Boomstick/the group:Oh. (*Cues: Unknown Theme*) Wiz: Anyway, after murdering his own parents at a young age “WHAT?!” Most of the group exclaimed in horror. “What kind of a sicko kills his own parents?!” Tirek was about to raise his hands but decided against it. Wiz: ...he was found and raised by a tribe of nomadic gypsies. Boomstick: Wait, are we still talking about Tyson? “No you simpleton,” Sombra said annoyed by Boomstick already. Wiz: The gypsy leader took Bison under her wing, and trained him in the art of Soul Power, an ancient art of utilizing the very essence of one's soul as a tool. “Fascinating,” muttered Twilight, Starlight, and Sombra as the three thought of multiple ways that it could be used. Boomstick: But since Bison's kind of a prick, he quickly mastered Soul Power, and began developing his own, much better version. “I have a bad feeling about this…” whispered Fluttershy as she held her plushie closer for safety. Wiz: See, Bison realized his soul was composed of two halves: one good, one evil. He forcefully dispelled all the goodness from his soul, thus pioneering one of the most destructive energies in fictional history: Psycho Power. Bison: This place shall become your grave! Psycho Power Soul used as destructive energy Only uses negative energies Telekinesis Flight Brainwashing Soul transference Destructive to user's body (*Cues: Unknown Theme*) Wiz: Yes, he literally weaponized his soul. “Seriously?!” Rainbow asked, gawking at such a revelation. “Is that possible?! Is there a spell like that?!” “W-Well, there haven’t been any records of a spell-” Twilight explained. “If there is, I must find it, and master it.” Tirek mumbled to himself. “Indeed, such a power would be quite useful…” Agreed Chrysalis. “But wait, what happen to his good soul?” Sonata asked curiously. “I mean, all that energy had to go somewhere, right?” Wiz: And uh, weird little thing, that good part of his soul. It physically manifested into a woman, named Rose. Everyone blinked at this. “How does THAT work?” Adagio scoffed. “So what, if I expel all my good energy is it gonna turn into a hot guy or something?” Wiz: Bison quickly built his criminal empire, with the intent of taking over the world, one day at a time. Bison: The day Bison graced your village was the most important day of your life. But for me, it was Tuesday. (*Cues: Street Fighter II: Turbo - M. Bison Theme Remix*) Boomstick: Hahaha, fan service! “Nice!” agreed Adagio as she gave off a wicked grin. Wiz: But it turns out his true motives are not even close to what you would expect. That had the group wondering what he meant by that. Bison: The governments of Earth are polluting the planet and obliterating its natural resources. Shadaloo will step them out and rule this planet! That caught the group by surprise and before they could say anything, something even stranger happened… Boomstick began to sing. Boomstick: (sings) Master Bison. He's our hero. Gonna take pollution down to zero. They then see something that leaves them stunned; They see Master Bison's head with frown on his face, on the body of some kind of superhero like character in a pose that reminded the main group of superman when he’s flying. The pose combined with the frown makes Bison look ridiculous along with Boomstick's cheesy singing in the background causes Rainbow Dash, Pinkie Pie, Sonata, and Discord to burst out laughing. Wiz: His Psycho Power... Boomstick (Singing and the Captain Bison flying around): Gonna help him! Conquer the world! Are a group of guys who like to kung fu bitches! This causes the rest of the group to join in on the laughter as they laughed until tears ran down their faces. (*Cues: Street Fighter IV - M. Bison Theme*) Wiz: ...his Psycho Power is immensely powerful and adaptable. Bison can use it for flight, telekinesis, teleportation and even psychic brainwashing, which has become quite a hobby of his. “A hobby we are well versed in,” bragged Adagio grinning along with her sisters. Boomstick: With Psycho Power he developed his own unique fighting style: Shadoloooooo-ism! “What-ism?” asked a confused Applejack. Wiz: Shadaloo-ism focuses on speed and destructive force over all else. Made possible by such moves as the Psycho Cannon, the Head Stomp, a scissor kick... Boomstick: And that cheap-ass slide kick. Over and over and over again! “Stop with the slide kick!” raged Pinkie Pie. WIz: As well as his deadliest attack the Psycho Crusher, which at full power can kill a normal human being in one shot. M. Bison is extremely cocky, considering himself no less than a god. And for good reason. He has been impaled, electrocuted, shot point-blank, crushed underneath a building, yet could resume the fight like nothing happened. “...... I could do better,” muttered Tirek. “Ya but only after you jack up on stolen magic,” snarked Twilight. Getting a few laughs from the rest of the group. Boomstick: The only Street Fighter who was able to pretty much put him down single-handedly was Akuma . But the Raging Demon is supposed to destroy a person's soul, yet Bison´s soul survived to fight another day. That impressed the part of the group that new who Akuma was and wondered how he was able to pull that off. Wiz: Psycho Power only has one major flaw. Bison's human body cannot contain its full potential, and will eventually break down. Fortunately for Bison, he can transfer his soul into other compatible bodies once his current one is used up. Move Set Psycho Cannon Psycho Field Scissor Kick Head Stomp Somersault Skull Diver Bison Warp [Teleport] Psycho Crusher (*Cues: Street Fighter Alpha 3 - Final Bison Theme*) Boomstick: But even if that fails, Bison says, "Screw caution!" and busts out one last trick. His ultimate form: Final Bison. “It’s just a wardrobe change,” remarked Starlight. Hoping for a cooler transformation. “Yeah, big whoop. Like changing clothes can give you more power,” Rainbow and Aria said at the same time. Wiz: The Final Bison form unleashes the Psycho Power´s full potential. Sure, it completely mutilates his body, but its sheer power practically guarantees victory. Final M. Bison AKA True Bison, Shin Bison Accesses the full potential of Psycho Power Unlimited super meter in game Little physical improvement No measurable time limit Somehow changes clothes Will eventually destroy Bison's body Boomstick: So who gives a shit? Wiz: Especially since he can always posses some other helpless victim´s body when he´s done. Boomstick: Told you. He´s a prick! “No arguments here,” said most of the group. Completely agreeing with Boomsticks statement. Bison: Yes, yes I killed your father. What is it with you women anyway? I killed my father too and you don't hear me whining about it! “That would be pretty strange if he did,” Sonata said with everyone agreeing with her. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ As the main group with Discord and Sombra felt that the two fighters were two evil to root for and the Dazzlings were more interested in just watching the fight, that only left Tirek and Chrysalis to choose someone to root for. Shao Kahn: Tirek. M. Bison: Chrysalis ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Wiz: Alright, the combatants are set. Let's end this debate once and for all Boomstick: It's time for a Death Battle! Death Battle (*Cues: Mortal Kombat: Armageddon - Belltower*) Shao Kahn witnesses two Tarkatan doing Mortal Kombat. Bison teleports out of nowhere and grabs one of the Tarkatan. M. Bison: Kneel before my Psycho Power! “There goes that guy,” Aria said, getting into the battle. The Tarkatan in his hand then screams before being disintegrated by M. Bison's Psycho Power. Shao Kahn jumps from his throne and smashes the second Tarkatan and enters the battle, Mortal Kombat style. Shao Kahn: Prepare to die. “Guess they don’t care about those guys,” Applejack said, feeling sorry for the two that just died. M. Bison: Hehehehe. FIGHT! Bison attempts a scissor kick, but is blocked and gets punched before sent flying with a hit from the Charging Spikes. Shao Kahn: Too easy. Kahn tosses his Wrath Hammer, but Bison teleports behind Kahn, without him noticing. Bison charges his fist with Psycho Power and punches Kahn in the face, then knocks him to the ground with a slide kick. Kahn retaliates and spits out a green fireball at Bison, but misses and the latter does the Psycho Crusher, then slams Kahn into the ground. M. Bison: Worthless! “GO Bison!” cheered Chrysalis. Bison levitates away, then attempts to brainwash Shao Kahn. “Oh this should be good,” commented Adagio as she wanted to see some master level brainwashing. M. Bison: Just try to withstand my Psycho Power! A purple aura surrounds Shao Kahn. M. Bison *altered pitch*: Are you frightened? Grovel before me! I'll scar your soul! But Kahn is impervious to the effects and laughs. “Ha! No mind tricks will work on a mighty warrior!” cheered Tirek much to Chrysalis annoyance. Shao Kahn: You are nothing. He then attacks Bison, sending him flying then uses the Charging Spikes in midair until Bison teleports away. Kahn throws an ethereal spear, which Bison dematerialized through then reforms and does a Head Stomp, which gets blocked. Bison does a Skull Crusher Dive but is knocked away by the Wrath Hammer. However, Bison quickly returns to the fight and does two scissors kicks followed by his enhanced Psycho Crusher, Nightmare Booster. M. Bison: Nightmare Booster! In the process, M. Bison smashes Shao Kahn through the walls of the fortress, then ascends upward. He then teleports, preparing the final phase of his super. M. Bison: This place shall become your grave! M. Bison falls downward, stomping Shao Kahn into the ground, then jumps further away. The group was wide eyed from the vicious combo and Tirek was starting to get worried that he would lose the bet. M. Bison: Utter scum! Shao Kahn gets up. Shao Kahn: Is that your best? “T-that didn’t even phase him,” stuttered out Applejack as the rest of the group stared wide at the unharmed conqueror. “Well Bisons fucked,” Sonata casually Commented, getting wide eyed looks from her sisters. Bison, in anger, sends a volley of Psycho Cannons at Kahn, but are reflected by the latter's Emperor´s Shield. The entire volley hits M. Bison and send him crashing into a pillar. Kahn jumps forward, impales Bison with an energy spear, then proceeds to beat him up with incredibly powerful punches. Shao Kahn: Feel the wrath of Shao Kahn! Kahn kicks Bison straight through the pillar, which sends him flying into another that falls and crushes Bison underneath. Shao Kahn: Flawless Victory! M. Bison: My Psycho Power knows no limits! (*Cues: Street Fighter 2 SNES - M. Bison Theme*) Bison bursts out of the rubble in his Final Bison form, in the violet flames that is his Psycho Power aura. “Here comes the costume change,” Aria said, not interested in this powerup. M. Bison: Death awaits! Bison does a powered-up version of Psycho Crusher and smashes Shao Kahn to the ground. As he gets up, Bison does a series of teleporting attacks until Shao Kahn throws a perfect punch and hits Bison and sends him flying. Shao Kahn then throws a barrage of Charging Spikes at Bison, eventually bringing him to the ground. Shao Kahn summons his hammer and smashes Bison over the head four times before he reverts back to normal Bison. Shao Kahn then picks up M. Bison and rips him in half. “Whoa-ho-ho-ho! HARDCORE!” cheered Pinkie Pie. (*Cues: Mortal Kombat 9 - Fatality theme*) Shao Kahn: Fatality! Bison's soul then materializes, floating upward. M. Bison: Bah! Puny garbage. “Guess he’s not done yet,” Starlight said, somewhat impressed. Shao Kahn then unleashes his Soulnado, which M. Bison's soul is slowly absorbed into. “Oh ya… the whole soul eating thing… forgot about that,” muttered Sombra. M. Bison: NOOOOOOOOOOO! Shao Kahn: Mwahahahaha! K.O.! Shao Kahn begins testing his new-found Psycho Power, floating up into the air, then firing multiple Psycho Cannons to his left and right, the last of which he fires at M. Bison's corpse, destroying it. “Well… shit,” thought most of the group as they saw Shao Kahn play with his new powers. Results (*Cues: Courtyard - Mortal Kombat Deception*) Boomstick: That can't be good. “No really?” The Dazzlings said sarcastically. Wiz: While Bison is one of the deadliest Street Fighters, and surviving the raging demon proves that he can protect his soul, Shao Kahn's thousands of years of combat experiences combined with his brutal tenacity ultimately triumphed. Also, Kahn's otherworldly makeup means it's extremely unlikely Bison's soul could possess him if given the chance. “So it was stacked against Bison from the start,” muttered Twilight as she thought of every little detail from this episode. Boomstick: And Kahn is no stranger to brainwashing. Hell, he used it on his own wife and daughter for years! Not to mention Bison's soul fueled Psycho Power isn't the best weapon against somebody who eats souls for breakfast. “That's like trying to fight Twilight with Hay burgers,” teased Rainbow Dash, getting some laughter from mostly everyone and a glare from a blushing Twilight. “DASH!” cried the embarrassed Twilight which got even more laughter from the group. Wiz: Shao Kahn has gained power from every soul he's devoured, by the rules of Mortal Kombat and assuming the possibility of losses, Kahn has consumed at least 60 billion souls over 10,000 years. That got the group all wide eyed at the possibility the ruler of outworld actually devouring that many souls. Boomstick: Looks like Kahn had a "soul-lution" for Bison. “.... that was terrible.” groaned out Tirek as he felt a pain worse then anything Tartarus could dish out. Wiz: The winner is Shao Kahn. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Boomstick: *singing* Maser Bison! He's our hero! Gonna take pollution down to zero! Gonna help him conquer the world! Are a group of guys who like to kung fu bitches! We're in Shadaloo! And you can be in too! Taking over our planet is the thing to do! (A bunch of children, who are Captain Planet's teammate’s heads replaced by Shadaloo members.) Looting and polluting is not the way but here's what Master Bison has to say! The Power is mine! *Evil laughter* Boomstick: Oh wait. Nevermind, Shao Kahn killed me. Now it's his power, I guess. Shao Kahn: You weak pathetic fool! Mwhahahaha! “.... dammit Boomstick.” muttered Rarity. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Boomstick: Next time on Death Battle. We cut to a scene of two ninjas under a full moon facing off each other and begin to charge and they raise their swords and slash down. RYU HAYABUSA! VS. *Tching, tching, tching!* STRIDER HIRYU! “So cool~!” cheered out Dash, Pinkie, Spike, and Sonata all at once. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Tirek looked at Chrysalis, smugly, and said, “I told you Kahn would win.” “Yes, yes. The all mighty conqueror won against the terrorist. You don’t have to rub it in,” Chrysalis growled. Before she could say anything else, Twilight and her group walked over to a glowing box, pecking the former queen’s confusion. “What’re you doing?” Twilight looked at the two and said, “After each episode, this box gives us some stuff.” “Mostly comics,” Rainbow and Pinkie said at the same time. Fuck you guys... “We do get other stuff. Just come and see,” Twilight said, waving them over. The two villains looked at each other and shrugged while joining the group. Pinkie opened the box and said, “Wow.” “Oh? What’s inside?” Adagio asked in mild interest. Behind her, Aria smacked her face while Adagio rolled her eyes. “Are there tacos in there?” Sonata asked, getting excited for her favorite food. “Nope, just a couple of hats, some clothes, a few figures and comic,” Pinkie said, pulling out a few familiar hats that Tirek and Chrysalis took. Tirek took a replica of Shao Kahn’s helmet while Chrysalis took M. Bison's hat. “I’ll be taking this,” Tirek and, putting the helmet on his head and making him look a bit intimidating. “As will I,” the former queen said, making the hat fit on her head. While the two were admiring their new headwear, the former sirens were looking at the clothes and saw that they were like the ones that Shao Kahn’s wife and daughter wore. The searched for the tags and saw that they were in their own sizes. “At least we got something good out of this,” Aria said, yawning a bit. “Aw, you know you had fun, Aria,” Sonata said, bouncing on her hooves. “Well now we have a new outfit as well besides our hoodies,” Adagio said, imaging how she looks in this outfit. “And i’m sure it will turn a few heads, especially the heads with bacon hair,” commented a disembodied voice. Freaking out most of the group except Discord who could only roll his eyes in annoyance. “What’re you doing here?” Discord asked grumpily. “Well I do have to take the extra baggage back where they belong.” answered the voice. If it heard the annoyance in Discord’s voice it obviously didn’t show it. “SO you’ve been bumped to delivery boy? Don’t know if that a good thing or now,” Discord said, rolling his eyes once more. “Um, what’s going on?” Fluttershy asked, carefully looking around. “Yeah and who’s talking?” Applejack asked, feeling lost for some reason. “I guess there’s no other way around this. Ahem, filles, dragon and everything else, may I introduce Deadman,” Discord said, twirling his arm a bit. Starlight’s eyes began to twitch at the mention of her tormentor's name. And as soon as Discord’s little introduction was finished, the ground began to shake and if someone were to look outside they would see thunderclouds forming in the sky as random pegasus scrambled to get the weather under control. “What the buck? I don’t remember the weather changing for today,” Rainbow said as Fluttershy hid behind her. And as fast as it came the weather cleared up and the ground shaking, leaving the group confused on what happened. “What the fuc-.” Adagio was about to curse but the sound of a load POP! Interrupted her and drew everyone's attention to the magic box and what they saw confused them more the Boomsticks singing. Floating above the box was a crimson Flame the size of a baseball with a jagged smile and sharp eyes that you would find on a jack-o-lantern. “Um, what is it?” Twilight asked, looking at the fireball. “It’s as I said. This is Deadman, a chaos god,” Discord said as if he was mildly annoyed. The group look at the small flame with a critical eye but waited to see what it could really do. Who knows it might be a small flame but could also have knowledge far greater than even Celestia herself. “...” the flame stayed silent as the group leaned in waiting for it to give out it’s words of wisdom. “Yo,” the small flame spoke in a lazy matter that would make a sirten Blue chaos god proud. Causing most of the group to sweat drop at such a lazy response. “This is a chaos god?” Rarity asked, squinting a little bit. “I expected something like Discord, not a match light,” Spike said, not believing it. “I’m sorry sir if you're not satisfied with the product then please call our customer support. 1-800-go eat a dick,” shot back the little flame shocking the group. “How revolting,” Rarity gasped. “Don’t talk to Spike like that,” Twilight said to the flame. “Meh,” scoffed the flame showing that it didn't take the princess of friendship seriously. “As much I would love to see you fight Deadman here, I need to know why you’re here,” Discord said, looking at the flame. He knew the chaos god wouldn’t go anywhere without a reason. “Like i said to take the extra baggage back where it belongs,” said the flame as it looked at the direction of todays guest. “And who’s the extra baggage?” Adagio asked, wanting to see where this could go. “Well miss legs for days, i’m here to take you all back to your rightful place,” answered the chaos flame. “You mean in Canterlot city? And thanks,” Adagio said to the god. “But we lived here before,” Sonata said, frowning a little bit. Aria said nothing as she didn’t really care where she went as long as they had food. “Sorry my little sirens but your a lot safer there than in this world,” replied the small flame with a hint of gentleness in it’s voice that caught even Discord by surprise. The Dazzlings nodded as Discord pointed at the two hatted villains said, “And these two? You gonna take them as well?” “Well of course! The former queen needs to go on a life journey and tartarus will want their prisoner back,” said the flame with a carefree voice. “I’d like to see you try,” Chrysalis said, blasting a beam of magic at the flame. Much to the shock to the rest of the group. But as soon as the beam hit it seem to just meld into the fire and make it grow for a few seconds, like gelsolin being poured into a camp fire. “(belch!) that was a spicy a meatball!” cheered the small flame as it belched out a cloud of smoke. “What but how? I put all of my magic into that beam,” Chrysalis said, backing up a bit. The fact that the flame seemed untouched frightened her to no end. “How did you absorb it?” Tirek asked, trying to get closer to the flame. Tirek just had the idea that if he could get close enough to the flame then he could absorb the magic and escape. But before he could get close enough a fist made of flame smashed into him causing him to slide across the floor and collide into Crystalis and having them both end up in a broken heap. “Fuck you that's how,” answered the flame with a flat tone. “But that’s not a good answer,” Twilight asked, trying to comprehend what’s going on. “She’s right, now what’re you really?” Aria asked, surprising her sister at how calm and bored she was. “As much as i love love talking about myself i really need to get you back to where you all belong sooo~!” sang the chaos god every member of the guest party all disappeared with a Pop sound leaving only the main group and two chaos beings and even they soon disappeared leaving a group of confused mares and one dragon behind. “Well, that was a thing. I say we watch the next episode to forget about this,” Spike said, holding a Shao Kahn figure in his claw and taking a seat. The girls looked at each other and shrugged as they sat down for the next episode. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ CHAPTER END! Next time RYU HAYABUSA VS. STRIDER HIRYU!
Ryu Hayabusa vs Strider Hiryu.Spike was about to push the play button when a doorbell rang. Confused, Spike asked, “Um… What was that?” “That was a doorbell but why did we hear that? We don’t have a doorbell,” Twilight said, trying to understand what was going on. The net moment she looked at Pinkie and said, “You installed a doorbell, didn’t you?” “Yup,” Pinkie said cheerfully. Twilight was just about to ask when she did it but kept her mouth shut. It was better to not to ask since Pinkie was involved. Instead Twilight said, “Who could be at the door?” Walk over to the front door, Twilight opened it to see someone she wasn’t even expecting. Standing in front of the door and wearing golden armor was the blue dragon princess Ember. “Princess Ember? What’re you doing here?” Twilight asked, shocked by her sudden appearance. “Hello Twilight Sparkle. I came by to pay Spike a visit,” Ember said while smiling. “May I come in?” “Of course. I’m sure Spike’ll be happy to see you,” Twilight said, allowing the dragon princess to enter. They walked back into the viewing room as Twilight said, “Spike, you have a visitor.” “Who could be here for me?” Spike asked, turning towards the door as his eyes went wide. “Princess Ember!!” Spike said, jumping off the couch and running towards his dragon friend. “Hello Spike, it’s good to see you,” Ember said, giving the smaller dragon a hug. “How’ve you been since the Gauntlet?” “I’ve been good. Just been helping Twilight and watching this new show we got,” Spike said, drawing Ember’s attention. “A show? What’s that?” Ember asked, curious about this thing that Spike likes. “Oh it’s a cool show where they talk about two characters and have them fight to the death,” Spike said, peaking Ember’s interest. “That sounds interesting, could I watch one with you?” Ember asked, letting go of the smaller dragon. “Can she Twilight?” Spike asked his sister/mother/friend hopefully. Twilight looked at her friends, who all had smiles on their faces, and said, “As Pinkie would say, the more the merrier.” “You got that right,” the party pony said, jumping on the couch. The princesses and dragon walked to the couch and took a seat as Spike pressed play on the remote. Interlude (*Cues: Invader - Jim Johnston*) Wiz: Ninjutsu. Originally created by farmers to kill their oppressive samurai lords, the ninja has become one of the deadliest killers in history. Boomstick: Like Ryu Hayabusa, the ultimate Dragon Ninja. “A Dragon Ninja?!” Spike exclaimed with stars in his eyes while Ember smirked, pride evident in her eyes. Wiz: And Strider Hiryu, the high-tech mercenary. “A mercenary? This should be interesting,” Applejack said, scratching her chin. Boomstick: He's Wiz and I'm Boomstick... Wiz: And it's our job to analyze their weapons, armor and skills, to find out who would win a death battle. Ryu Hayabusa (*Cues: Ninja Gaiden (NES) - Main Theme (Orchestral)*) Wiz: His name literally meaning Dragon Falcon- “Now that's a badass name!” Rainbow Dash smiled. “Totally!” Spike agreed, giving her a fist/hoof-bump while Ember nodded. Background Height: 179 cm / 5'10" Weight: 78 kg / 172 Lbs Age: 25 AKA Dragon Ninja & Master Ninja Occupation: Antique stop owner Animal Spirit: Peregrine Falcon Hobbies: Mountain climbing, fishing, eating sushi, kicking ass. Wiz: Ryu Hayabusa was born in the Dragon-lineage legacy, and trained in the ways of the ninja from the moment he could crawl. Boomstick: How are you supposed to keep a baby in their crib when they can freakin' back-flip out of it? “You think that’s hard? Try keeping a baby unicorn and pegasus from flying all over the house.” Pinkie shuddered, remembering the first time she babysat the Cake twins. “(giggle) well Ryu sure fits the dragon part of his name when it comes to being a little trouble maker,” laughed Ember as it's a well known fact that young hatchlings make it their mission in life to stress out their parents by constantly trying to crawl or even fly out of the nest to explore the new world they are born in. Wiz: A prodigy in the art of combat, Ryu far exceeded his clan's expectations. When he turned 18, he donned the traditional blue garb, (*Cues: The Night of Lukifell - Ninja Gaiden*) Wiz: then single-handedly defeated both the criminal cult of Nostradamus and the army of Emperor Garuda. That bit on info gained both some stunned looks from the group and even some looks of respect from a few members of the group like Rainbow Dash and Ember. Boomstick: And that was before his father gave him the Dragon Sword: a single-edged katana carved from the fang of a dragon which, when combined with the mystical eye of the dragon, becomes a divine blade of ultimate power. “Wait, he uses the body parts of a Dragon as weapons?” Spike asked, unnerved by the sudden revelation. “...that's kinda gruesome.” Fluttershy stated in a equally repulsed tone. “*Pfft!* don’t be such sissies.” scoffed Ember as she rolled her eye’s at the two’s reaction. “But Ember! They use dragon body parts!” yelled Spike, witch got a scoff from his fellow dragon. “Let fill you in on something Spike,” said the young dragon lord. “It’s dragon custom to make weapons and armor out of our fallen brothers and sisters, heck it’s a sign of honor to see another race use dragon made weapons because it shows even other races know of our strength.” stated Ember to a wide-eyed Spike and a giddy Twilight as she wrote everything down on a notepad. “So fascinating!” cheered The the Princess of Friendship as she wrote down every last detail from embers little lecture. While Rainbow Dash started wondering if she could get her hooves on some dragon armor. Wiz: It also has one serious security system. If someone other than a strong-willed Hayabusa attempts to wield it, the true Dragon Sword will feed on and eventually devour their soul. That got everyone even Ember to wince at such a deadly security system, not even the elements of harmony or even the dragon scepter had that kind of defence against thieves. True Dragon Sword Hayabusa clan heirloom Carved from a dragon fang Eye of the Dragon unleashes sword's full power Divine blade Practically indestructible Weak-willed cannot wield it True power is said to upset the balance of a peaceful world. Boomstick: I need that kind of tech for my car! Teach those damn caddy-smashing raptors a lesson. That got some laughs from the main group while Ember was wondering what the heck was a caddy. (*Cues: Ninja Gaiden - Main Theme*) Wiz: In addition Ryu has an enormous arsenal of various weaponry, including the Lunar Staff, Falcon's Talons, a Kusari-gana, basically a chain sickle, numerous types of, shurikens, bombs, bows, etc., etc. and the Eclipse Scythe: a weapon forged by werewolves and quenched in the blood of living human beings. Because some people just have to do things the hard way. Arsenal Lunar Staff Falcon's Talons Kusari-gama Shurikens Regular, explosive, & windmill Fiend's Bane Bow Smoke Bomb Vigoorian Flail Eclipse Scythe Tonfas War Hammer Howling Cannon Dragon's Claw & Tiger's Fang Spear Gun Nunchaku Bare fists While most of the group marveled at the vast array of weapons, the rest of the group grimaced at the gruesome backstory of the eclipse scythe. Boomstick: (cough) The badass way Wiz. “Damn straight!” Rainbow Dash smirked. Boomstick: And if that wasn't enough, he´s also a magician! But instead of pulling rabbits out of a hat, it´s a fire dragon! “Awesome!” cheered Dash Pinkie Pie, Spike, and even Ember at the sight of the fire dragon. Wiz: Uh, no, though that would make one impressive party trick. Pinkie immediately pulled out a notebook and started writing the idea down, much to Applejack’s horror. “Wiz, you’ve gone and doomed us all.” She whispered. (*Cues: Unknown Theme*) Wiz: Ryu channels the energies of his unusually strong spirit for mystical techniques called Ninpo. This got the Twilight and Starlight invested at the prospect of even more forms of different magic. Boomstick: Well this ninpogician can summon fireballs, create a fighting shadow of himself, blow shit up with his own version of the Torn Sky Blast, and even seems to be able to teleport short distances-what the fuck, did he just turn into a bird?! “Yay!” cheered Fluttershy as she sees Ryu turn into a majestic bird. “How!?” Asked Ember, Applejack, and Spike, both gawking at the transformation. Wiz: Ryu's spirit is so unnaturally strong he can manipulate that spiritual energy to perform supernatural feats: like the bird thing, and surviving fatal wounds, though this pseudo-healing factor requires a lot of time, rest, and meditation to pull off. “I guess this ninpo has it’s limits,” commented Applejack. Ninpo Art of the Inferno Art of the Fire Wheels Doppelgänger Blink (Teleport) Art of Divine Life Art of Substitution Art of the Piercing Void Hayabusa Torn Sky Blast (Hayabusa falls from the sky, grabs onto an armed goon, then lands while stabbing him. Ryu then removes his sword from the goon's body, splattering it.) “Sweet,” Ember said with a whistle. “Swift yet deadly, I like this guy!” Chuckled Rainbow Dash. “Careful, you’ll make a certain blue boy jealous!” Pinkie giggled, prompting the rainbow-maned pegasus to pull out her notebook. “I mean, how’s Soarin gonna compete with a ninja?” Pinkie continued, causing her to slowly put the book away. “You get a pass...” She mumbled. (*Cues: Dead or Alive 2 - The Shooted*) Boomstick: Ryu is fast enough to deflect automatic fire, tough enough to land a 300-meter drop, and has developed a ninja sense, which anticipates danger. Like when a chick asks if she looks fat in a new outfit. “Of course YOU would need something like that Boomstick,” muttered Rarity with an eye roll. Wiz: And despite mastering the ninja art of stealth, he tends to just rush in, swords swinging. Every. Single. Time. “Pfft! Who needs stealth anyway?” asked Rainbow Dash, getting a few blank stares from her friends. “Ninjas.” stated Fluttershy with a dry tone. Boomstick: Hey, whatever works. He´s destroyed entire armies of fiends and demons, killed the Dark Dragon, twice somehow, won the second Dead Or Alive tournament, avenged his father's death and finally annihilated the Devil himself, all just to get himself laid. Feats Won the 2nd DOA tournament Survived the Grip of Murder Lands 300 meter drops regularly Has slain demons & dragons Defeated Dark Dragon, Doku, Tengu, Jaquio & the Goddess Single-handedly battles demons, monsters, robots, & armies for a living “I highly doubt that's the reason,” deadpanned Twilight. Ryu: Such selfish arrogance... I cannot allow this! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ The group had to admit that Ryu was a cool and honorable warrior and a few like Rarity had taken a liking to him. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Strider Hiryu (*Cues: Strider - Stage 1 Theme then cues【Nam Kap】 Defense Sphere (1Stage Demo) ~ Step into (1Stage BGM1) 【BGM】*) Wiz: His name literally meaning Flying Dragon- “Another insanely awesome name!” Spike rejoiced, excited and proud that both combatant’s names emphasized the awesomeness of Dragons. “Of course!” Ember proudly proclaimed. “Anything that has “Dragon” in it’s name is amazing by default. Dragon Blade, Dragon Fist, Dragon Dance...” Pinkie giggled perversely. “Oh! How about Dragon di-” “Finish that sentence and I’ll incinerate you!” Ember growled. “-ctionary…?” Pinkie finished with a nervous tone. Wiz: Hiryu was orphaned at a very young age. He was put through the intense Strider program, a training school for high-tech ninja mercenaries. Background Height: 179 cm / 5'10" Weight: 85 kg / 187 Ibs Age: 2,021 years Rank: Special-A Class Strider Occupation: Retired Superhuman senses Hobbies: Peace, seclusion, boring stuff Boomstick: It's so hard to find a good cyber-ninja school these days. “I wish we had a cyber ninja school,” pouted Rainbow Dash. “Ah doubt we’d have the tech or the budget for somthin’ like that...” Applejack said, sounding slightly disappointed herself. Wiz: Seems whoever put him there made the right choice. (*Cues: Strider Hiryu Theme - Ultimate Marvel vs Capcom 3*) Wiz: Hiryu far exceeded his teachers´ expectations, and soon became the youngest student in the organization's history to reach the highest rank of Special A-Class Strider. The group was yet again impressed with how the two fighters were both young prodigies who surpassed all expectations and became the legends they are now today. Boomstick: What does that mean? Well, even a C-Class Strider has the strength and skill of a whole team of special forces, so just imagine what a Special A-Class Strider can do. Oh wait, you don't have to ‘cause we're here to tell you about it! “Oh well! I wasn’t planning to use my brain today anyway,” joked Pinkie Pie getting a few laughs from her friends. Wiz: After reaching this remarkable rank, Hiryu was sent on a mission to kill a rogue Strider, who just so happened to be his own sister. “WHAT!?” screamed the group while the more sensitive of the group were about to cry from the memory of the teenage mutant ninja turtles episode. Boomstick: Naturally, pissed off at the Striders manipulating him and his sister, he immediately retired... after killing her, of course. “B-but why!?” Yelled a confused Applejack. “She was more likely still a threat to the world and he had no choice,” answered Ember with a pitying look for the cyber ninja. (*Cues: Destroy the Terrorists in the Occupied City - Strider 2*) Wiz: Hiryu wields a deadly lightsword Cypher named Falchion. It generates a blade of high voltage plasma energy which can slice through almost anything. Today, plasma cutters can reach temperatures over 2 million degrees Celsius, cutting through steel and other metals with ease. “Only my father has been known to breath fire that hot,” statet Ember. Impressed that Hiryu had a weapon that could match her father's legendary fire breath. “And Celestia is one of the two fire users that can create magic fire that hot,” committed Twilight. “Who’s the second?” asked Starlight. “Sunset,” answered Twilight thinking about her friend from another world. Boomstick: It's basically a super-long extending lightsaber. Wiz: Well, kind of, it´s a sword with a plasma aura that leaves a trail of death. It can also fire plasma arrows and counter projectiles. “Hot dang! Those things are versatile!” said an impressed Applejack. Boomstick: All with an incredibly satisfying shing sound. (*Strider swings Cypher*) Boomstick: That's the one. “Oooh~ such a good sound!” moaned Pinkie Pie. “I’d like that sound to off when I use my claws!” Spike smirked. Falchion Light Sword Cypher Extendable through plasma charging Boost [Plasma wave projectiles] Plasma arrows Deflects projectiles Shape-shifting properties Can destroy projectiles Incinerates opponents (*Cues: Burning Force - Namco X Capcom*) Wiz: Apart from the Cypher, Hiryu wields a large arsenal of sci-fi gear and weaponry, including the Varga: a teleporting device. He uses his medical tech to heal wounds, the climb sickles to, well, climb, the jump trick to... jump higher. “The naming is… simplistic,” said Rarity, trying to be nice. Boomstick: I guess they don't have a thesaurus at the ninja school. “BLASPHEMY!!” Twilight screamed in anger as she went into her Rainbow Form, startling the rest of the group. “ALL SCHOOLS SHOULD HAVE A THESAURUS!!” When she noticed everyone staring at her she immediately calmed down and turned back to normal. “Ehehe… sorry...” “...she’s scary when she’s mad.” Ember whispered to Spike, feeling a bit more respect for the Princess of Friendship. “You should’ve seen her when Tirek blew up her library.” Spike shuddered. Boomstick: He also has a device that can cause earthquakes, shoot fire and launch big balls of electricity. “He’s a walking weapons arsenal!” Gawked Rainbow Dash. Weaponry Kunai Fire Trick Launches a fireball Ground Trick Creates a small quake Spark Trick Launches a ball of electric energy Spark Ball: Sends it along the ground Wiz: And last, but not least, he has three types of cybernetic drones at his back and call. Option A are twin satellite bots which shield Hiryu and shoot wave after wave of deadly laser discs. “Those sound neat,” commented Twilight liking option A a lot. “Maybe I could build one...” Boomstick: Option B is a Robo-Panther. It´s like a giant death-cat that doesn't need a litter box or scratch the shit out of your furniture. Applejack giggled at this. “Hey Rarity, Ah think we found Opal’s replacement!” Rarity rolled her eyes at her southern friend. “Oh haha.” Wiz: Finally, Option C is a robotic hawk with bladed wings and over sized grenades. Boomstick: Argh, I hate birds! Now they have grenades. “What’s wrong with birds? Birds are nice.” Fluttershy said. “Ah’d rather not have to deal with any grenade-tossing birds.” Applejack stated. “It’s bad enough they hover over our picnics all the time...” Options Option A Satellite drone "Bot" Laser guns Can power machinery Option B Robotic panther Fiercely loyal Option C Robotic hawk Bladed wings Can drop grenades Wiz: Hiryu´s speed and agility are off the charts. Fortunate, since he also doesn't seems to ever use his ninja stealth skills. He´s even fast enough to dodge shadow tag bullets: highly advanced ammunition designed to track supersonic targets, like Striders. Basically, anti-aircraft rounds for people. “And he’s able to dodge weapons made for the sole purpose of killing him!?” yelled an amazed Starlight. Boomstick: He´s also strong enough to slice clean through the human body... with a karate chop!!! “WOAH!” Rainbow, Ember, and Spike exclaimed, impressed by the sheer power and speed this man possessed. Wiz: Hiryu has somehow been in retirement for over 2,000 years; likely because of the advanced medicine of the future. Yet despite distancing himself from the Strider program, (*Cues: Strider Hiryu Theme - Marvel vs Capcom*) Wiz: he has been pulled out of retirement more times than John McClane. “Can’t they just leave him in peace?” asked Fluttershy feeling bad for the cyber ninja. Boomstick: He's fought dinosaurs and giant robots, destroyed a moon-sized space station, and is so badass he considers huge flying warships mere toys. He even slew the magical creator of the world... twice. Apparently God is no match for this future ninja. Feats Avoided shadow tag bullets Has slain armies & dinosaurs Is over 2,000 years old Destroyed a moon-sized space station Slices people with bare hands Defeated Matic, Faceas Clay, Striders & Grandmaster Meio Strider Hiryu: No place for amateurs. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Wiz: Alright. The combatants are set. Let's end this debate once and for all. Boomstick: It's time for a Death Battle! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ The teams so far are. Ryu Hayabusa: Spike, Applejack, Rarity, Fluttershy. Strider Hiryu: Twilight, Starlight, Pinkie Pie, Rainbow Dash. Ember liked them both. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Death Battle (*Cues: Ninja Gaiden - Alma Saves Rachel*) An armed soldier stands in a building under construction as both Hayabusa and Hiryu appear and kill him with a slash from their swords. “That's one way to start a fight i guess,” commented Twilight with a flat look. Already getting desensitized by all the death she’s seen throughout the show. Soldier: (Wilhelm scream) “Poor Wilhelm,” sighed out Pinkie Pie. feeling bad for the voice that will always be known for death. Hayabusa and Strider then jump backwards into a fighting pose. FIGHT! (*Cues: Ninja Gaiden - Alma Awakened*) Ryu jumps backwards and throws three shurikens at Hiryu but misses as he slides under them and ambushes Ryu, slashing him towards a wall. Hayabusa bounces off the wall and hits Hiryu with his True Dragon Sword and causes him to fall down. Ryu bears down on Hiryu with his sword several times, and then Hiryu cartwheels over Hayabusa. Hiryu slashes at Ryu, but he blocks it and throws a Boomerang Shuriken at Hiryu, who cartwheels over him again. Hiryu dodges the Shuriken flying past him and jumps over, starts slashing at Ryu multiple times, and after cartwheeling over him again, slices the flying Shuriken in half. Hayabusa slashes at Hiryu multiple times with the Dragon Sword and successfully kicks him into the wall. Hiryu bounces off the wall, but Ryu catches him in midair and pile drives Hiryu into the ground. Ryu pulls out his Eclipse Scythe. He attempts to kill Hiryu with it but Hiryu teleports out of the way, and cleanly removes the scythe's blade with his Cypher. “Not the awesome Scythe!” cried Rainbow Dash. “(scoff) How ironic that a weapon that took human sacrifices to be made was destroyed by a man made weapon,” scoffed Applejack finding it fitting that an evil weapon like that was finally destroyed. Hayabusa jumps back and pulls out a Whip Chain. He swings it, and throws it at Hiryu with precision, but Hiryu decimates it into two dozen embers of metal with a combo of slashes. “Hiryu is just cleaving through Ryu’s defences!” gasped out Starlight seeing weapons that would be considered masterpieces in combat and high grade magic being torn apart by Hiryu’s man made weapons. Ryu charges his Ninpo and an ethereal shadow of himself appears. The two continuously attack Hiryu with their swords until Hiryu summons his satellite drones. Strider Hiryu: Back off! As the satellite bots fire their laser discs, Ryu jumps forward, dodging them, and destroys the drones with a well-aimed shuriken. “But Ryu is still holding on and still going strong!” cheered Rarity. (*Cues: Dead Or Alive 5: Last Round - Ryu's Determination*) Ryu lands and fires a high-speed wave of arrows. Hiryu dodges the arrows. Ryu prepares to fire an arrow with a bomb attached to it, but Hiryu's plasma Cypher destroys Ryu´s bow. Hiryu charges at Ryu and slashes but misses as Ryu teleports. Ryu appears behind him and prepares his Torn Sky Blast. Hiryu is hit by the blast and is sent to another room. Hayabusa tries to stab Hiryu in the neck but he jumps over, and uses his sickles to climb the wall, dodging the first attack and slashing at the second. Both ninjas attack each other, doing fight combos as they fly up the building. Strider Hiryu is knocked upward, seemingly the last person hit. “Man look at them go!” cheered Applejack getting more excited as the battle continued. Ember agreed with the southern mare with a nod as she continued to watch the two warriors fight. “It’s like stories my father used to tell me about two dragons fighting for the title of dragon lord.” (*Cues: Ninja Gaiden - Alma Awakened*) Then Hiryu uses his medical tech to heal as Ryu Hayabusa heals with his ninpo. Then both prepare to fire their blasts and when they connect, it causes a small explosion, knocking both back. Hiryu is pushed back further and is about to summon his robotic animals. "go animal friends," cheered Fluttershy. Strider Hiryu: There's no escape! Legion! As his robotic animals charge at Ryu, Hayabusa destroys them all with a single combo. He attacks but Hiryu jumps out of the way and fires his Cypher´s plasma arrows. Ryu flips past them and jumps on a crane. Hiryu flies up the same crane as Ryu throws several fireballs at him. (*Cues: Ninja Gaiden - Chapter Clear*) Hiryu disperses them by swinging his sword. Ryu jumps on top of the crane after him. (*Cues: Ninja Gaiden - Orchestral Compilation*) Both ninjas stand, staring at each other, then both run towards each other, jumping forward, and swinging their swords once. The group leaned in to watch what was no doubt the deciding strike the would decide the fate of the two fighters. They both land on the ground. There are a few seconds of silence until Hayabusa is wounded, bleeding. Team Ryu winced as they saw the warrior of the Hayabusa clan stood there stunned from the deadly wound inflicted on him. (*Cues: Beasts - Strider*) Strider Hiryu: Time to end this! Ragnarok! “What a cool name!” cheered Spike. Strider blitz Ryu at every angle with the Varja, then pile drives Hayabusa straight through the roof and keeps going through all of its stories to the base of the skyscraper. The deed done, Strider Hiryu vanishes. K.O.! As one of Hiryu's hawks drops a grenade on Ryu, Strider Hiryu leaves the building using his glider. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Results (*Cues: Strider Hiryu's Theme - Marvel vs Capcom*) Boomstick: Ragnar-owned! Wiz: This fight was very close, and Ryu's ninpo was certainly a match for Hiryu's gadgets. Boomstick: But Ryu's enormous arsenal was useless against the Cypher. It was hard to fight that statement after the group clearly saw the Cypher cleave through Ryu’s weapons and magic. Wiz: The only weapon that can stand up to the Cypher was his True Dragon Sword, but even then, while it can cut through people like butter, Hiryu does the same with his bare hands. “So awesome,” whispered Ember. Boomstick: This guy can make a wicked sandwich. Also while Ryu can deflect automatic fire, Strider can dodge personalized anti-aircraft bullets. “Again another guy i would like to have a fight with,” commented Rainbow Dash with a grin. Wiz: If you consider the differences in speed, this means Hiryu is at least 43% faster. Ultimately, Hiryu surpasses Ryu in strength, speed, and weaponry. “Things were just stacked against Ryu from the beginning,” concluded Starlight. Boomstick: Looks like Strider just floored Hayabusa. Wiz: The winner is Strider Hiryu. “Man that was awesome!” cheered Ember. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Boomstick: Next time on Death Battle. ?: I'll teach you to behave! Announcer: *Singing* KIller! Killer! Boy, she's a killer! “.... Why do I have the feeling i’m going to hate this episode?” muttered Rarity. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ “Quick, to the box,” Rainbow and Pinkie said at the same time, running towards the glowing box as the others calmly walked over. Ember followed the group unsure of why they needed to go to the box. Seeing Ember’s confusion, Twilight said, “When we started watching the show, after each episode this box would give us a few things that related to the characters.” “And what kinds of stuff do you get?” Ember asked, generally interested. “We get comics, toys, some clothes and even…” Twilight said, naming a few things they got. “Ninja clothes!!” Pinkie said, waving around a bunch of clothes in different colors. She handed a different color set to everyone as Spike jumped into the box. “Aw yeah, my own ninja outfit. This is awesome,” Rainbow Dash said, trying on her blue outfit already. “Might not be a ninja but this is some fancy looking clothes,” Applejack said looking at her own orange outfit. She’ll have to save this for when she needs to sneak someplace. “The material used for this is top notch quality. It feels so light yet sturdy,” Rarity said, examining her own white ninja outfit. Fluttershy put her pink ninja outfit in her saddle bag with Doomguy Plushie. Ember walked towards the box and popped it as Sike popped out at the same moment. Looking at the younger dragon, she saw that her was holding a wooden box in his claws and pushing it into her own claws. “I found that with your name on it,” the baby dragon said cheerfully. The dragon princess looked at the box to see that her ae was on the box. Setting it down on the ground, Ember opened the box and marveled at the contents inside. From what she could see, the box had a neatly folded black ninja outfit, a small number of shurikens, a ninjato and an old weathered book titled “The Art of Ninjutsu.” “My word,” Ember said as she picked up the book and started to skim through it. She could see that the book had a wealth of knowledge as the pages showed different tactics and weapons that were used. Closing the book, she put it back into the box and closed it up. “Got something good?” Twilight asked as Spike in a black ninja outfit climbed on her back. “Indeed I did, but I must be going,” Ember said sadly, holding the box under her arm. “You sure you can’t stay for more?” Spike asked. Shaking her head, Ember said, “I’m sorry Spike, but I must head home.” “... You will come back, right?” Spike asked, looking a bit down. “Of course I’l come back. We’re friends and I would like to spend more time with you,” Ember said, walking towards Spike and giving him a quick hug. “Until next time, Spike,” she said while walking out the door. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Later ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Ember was sitting down on the cave floor, studying the book on how to correctly use the ninjato. Setting the book down on the table, Ember grabbed the sword with both hands and held it in front of her. Taking a quick glance at the book, she started to correct her stance by moving her blade at waist level. With another quick glance, Ember moved her feet to the right position as the book showed her. Taking a deep breathe, Ember slowly raised the sword above her head and brought it down the very next moment. She repeated this process a few times before she decided to try something out. She returned the sword to her original position as she bent her legs slightly and jumped into the air. While Ember was airborne, she did a simple front flip and landed on one foot with the other raised and said, “Hiyah.” Not that far from Ember was the previous dragon lord Torch, who was sleeping. Hearing the ruckus of his successor, he opened his eyes in time to see her land in a ridiculous pose. Rolling his eyes but smiling, the old dragon lord went back to sleep and dreamt of his daughter making him proud. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ CHAPTER END! NEXT TIME IVY VS ORCHID!
Ivy vs Orchid.It was a new day for our heroes as they did the same thing they’ve been doing for the last few days. Sit on their plots and watch the next episode of Death Battle. Not like they have anything better to do. “I have a bad feeling about this episode,” Rarity said as everyone took a seat on the couch. “What makes you say that, Rarity?” Rainbow Dash said, grabbing the tub of popcorn. “It’s just that the preview from yesterday,” Rarity said, looking away from her friends. “Oh c’mon silly filly. It’s not like anything bad’s gonna happen,” Pinkie said nonchalantly, waving her hoof around. “I mean it’s not like something crazy is gonna happen today.” There was a flash of light, blinding everyone in the room. While the girls and dragon tried to adjust to their surroundings, they heard a very familiar voice. A familiar voice that filled most of the occupants with dread and one with anger. “I'M BACK, BITCHES!” the voice said causing everyone to groan. “What’re you doing here, Deadman?” Twilight asked, her vision returning to her. What she saw wasn’t just the small jack-o-lantern like flame but the Dazzlings in their pony forms in front of them. “Just here to drop off the guest stars,” muttered the chaos flame as he placed the three sirens on the couch. “And we appreciate it,” Adagio said, leaning back into seat. The other former sirens grabbed a hooffull of snack and started to eat. “Yeah, we had fun the last time,” Sonata said, eating a chocolate mousse truffle. “And Adagio wanted to see more of this stuff so she could seduce-” Aria began to say as Adagio put her hoof in the pink pony’s mouth. “Ha ha ha. Pay her no mind,” Adagio said, laughing nervously. “Heh well whatever, I’ll see after the episode. Deadman OUT!” yelled the chaos god as he disappeared in a bright flash Everyone was prepared this time as they covered their eyes before the flash went off. Once the light died down, Twilight sighed as she grabbed the remote and pressed play. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Interlude (*Cues: Invader - Jim Johnston*) Wiz: When it comes to the tantalizing femme fatale, these two combatants are the pinnacle of beauty and brawn... not to mention well endowed. “Oh Celestia why…” muttered Rarity get getting some grins from the sirens already thinking of a way of making this even more fun. Boomstick: Ivy from Soul Calibur... Wiz: ...And... Boomstick: *interrupting* ...Black Orchid from Killer Instinct! Sorry, I'm excited! “So are we~” Adagio giggeld. Wiz: I'm Wiz and he's Boomstick and it's our job to analyze their weapons, armor, and skills to find out who would win a Death Battle. Ivy Valentine (*Cues: Unblessed Soul (Ivy's Theme) - Soul Calibur*) Ivy: Behave. Behave! “Oh, I'll behave!” Sonata cooed while Rarity groaned. “Only if she “rewards” me later~!” Wiz: Left on the doorstep of a London mansion, the infant Isabella was adopted and raised by the noble house of Valentine. Background Full name: Countess Isabella Valentine Height: 177.8 cm / 5'10" Weight: 58 kg / 128 Ibs Age: 49 [Physically 32] Hometown: London Daughter of Cervantes Fighting Style: Self-taught A dominatrix for no real reason Boomstick: Little did they know she'd grow up to be this deadly dominatrix. Oh-ho, daddy must be so proud. Aria smirked at Boomstick’s depiction of her. “Mmhm~ I know how proud I'd be!” “...ugh,” sighed Rarity already knowing this was going to be a long episode. Wiz: Well, he's dead, so there's that. Both her father and mother died while searching for the legendary Soul Edge, leaving Isabella, or Ivy, as their sole legacy. Her only remaining parent is her birth father, the pirate Cervantes... who is a zombie... sometimes. The screen suddenly changed to show both Cervantes as a zombie in Soul Calibur 4 and his human form in the 5th game. “Wait, how does that work? Was he resurrected between games or something?” Spike asked in confusion. “It’s possible but we’ll never know unless he fights on this show,” Starlight said, shrugging her shoulders. Boomstick: Well then, good call on the baby dumpster donation. Zombie pirates don't make good fathers. Believe me, I know. Wiz (and the rest of the group): ...What? Boomstick: Ivy also has some awfully great, uhuhuhum... magic. “Yes…. “magic”, hmhmhm~” Adagio giggled perversely with her sisters. Rarity bit her lip, trying her best not to lose her temper. “*Snicker*This is going to be great,” snickered Rainbow Dash along with Pinkie Pie. Wiz: Her father was a skilled alchemist, and Ivy took up his research to find and destroy Soul Edge. She taught herself summoning and alchemy rituals, which she used to forge her unique sword: the Valentine. Magic Alchemy Lab-based Instrumental in creating her snake sword Not typically for combat Used in some special moves Summoning magic Sphere traps Magic fire Nightmare's hand Acasual Paradox Critical Edge Grand Alchemy Critical Finish (*Cues: Without the Blessing of Fate - Soul Calibur V*) Boomstick: The Valentine is an extendable snake sword with a stupid name. It should've been called "Deadly as Fuck", since it works just like a normal sword, but with a flick of Ivy's wrist, it turns into a nine-meter long whip of blades. It can be used in all sorts of ways, even a stealthy underground attack. “Can't say I disagree with him on the name…” Rainbow said. “I would've called it something cooler like "the viper”!” “Quite an impressive method though." Twilight said as she started taking notes. “Using magic to enhance and extend a sword like that… I might have to try it sometime.” “Aren't you already having problems with the robo-hmph!” asked Spike before his mouth was covered by a nervous twilight, getting a confused look from the rest of the group. Wiz: It is also sentient, with a mind of its own. Ivy accomplished this by summoning the hand of Nightmare, which breathed life into the sword. Boomstick: Wait, hold on. How does a hand breathe, exactly? “Yeah! That makes no sense!” Pinkie agreed. “What? Was there a mouth on its hand or something?” Wiz: Of all I've talked about, that is what you question? Anyway, since Nightmare is Soul Edge personified, this ironically joined Ivy's own fate to the very abomination she seeks to destroy. Whoops. Boomstick: I'd like to join Ivy's fate, if you know what I'm saying! “No argument there!” Aria chuckled. “I wouldn't mind being “joined” to her as well~” Adagio purred. Sonata licked her lips. “Join her in be-” “Can you three stop that?!” Rarity groaned. “It's bad enough when Boomstick does it!” “We're Sirens so… no.” Sonata stated, sticking out her tongue. “...technically you're all former Sirens.” Starlight corrected them. “Meh, Poh-tay-to, Po-tah-to.” Sonata shrugged. Applejack blinked. “Who the buck says Po-tah-to?” WIz: This curse bounded Ivy's blood to the immortal Soul Edge so thoroughly her body actually stopped aging. Boomstick: Um, actually Wiz, what I think is happening here is that her age is getting stored in her enormous rack. I mean, they just keep getting bigger and bigger as time goes by! Wiz: Well, you never know with magic. “Wait, that's possible?!” Sonata asked in shock before looking at her sisters. "You mean our boobs could've been getting bigger all those years we spent in the human world?!” Adagio was too lost in her own thoughts to listen. “If there's a spell for that, I will find it… and I will master it…” Aria rolled her eye’s but silently agreed with her sisters on that one. (*Cues: Soul Calibur II - Maze of the Blade*) Wiz: Ivy is skilled with all her sword's forms, but long-range combat is her bread and butter. She is very good at controlling the battlefield with wide whip swings, powerful kicks, and precision strikes. Valentine Snake Sword Formerly called "Ivy Blade" Alternates between sword & whip Max whip length: 9 m / 30 ft Can use Guard Impacts Can perform Edge Attacks Granted life by Soul Edge Critical Finish & Edge moves Definitely not for novice swordsmen Boomstick: I mean, let's be honest, who would really want to use that thing as a normal sword? “If you’re skilled enough, then you can use a weapon in anyway possible,” Twilight said causing the girls to look at her curiously. Seeing their gazes on her, Twilight said, “Shining told be about ponies using weapons in unorthodox ways.” “Who the heck is shining?” asked Sonata but not receiving a response causing said blue sairen to puff her cheeks in frustration. “My brother,” Twilight said happily as the Sirens got a mischievous look on their faces. Seeing the looks, Twilight quickly added, “He’s married.” “That just makes it hotter~” Sonata giggled. Wiz: She has spent most of her life seeking and destroying anything remotely related to Soul Edge, innocent or otherwise, which will eventually include herself, when all is said and done. “While i can agree that something like soul edge should be destroyed, I can’t however agree with her methods,” muttered out Twilight with narrowed eyes. Wiz: But despite having one of Soul Calibur's deadliest move sets, she has a rather spotty win/loss record. Known Win/Loss W/L - 3/4 Loss - Astaroth Loss - Taki Win - Seong Mi-na Loss - Zasalamel Win - Zasalamel rematch Loss - Cervantes Win - Cervantes rematch Boomstick: Don't they make pads for that? “Oh shut up!” Rarity snapped. The rest of the group snickered in amusement. Wiz: Still, she has defeated countless foes and accomplished impressive feats. Boomstick: Like kicking a point-blank bullet out of the air! Damn, that's fast! “DAMN!” Rainbow, Spike, and Aria exclaimed. Wiz: Well, more so insanely accurate instinct. Presumably, she's using the weight of her above-average-sized breasts as momentum to increase her speed. Boomstick: If that's a real martial art, I'm going to find it, and then teach it. “Indeed, definitely putting that on the "must learn" list!” Adagio agreed enthusiastically. Wiz: Ivy is a warrior who uses everything at her disposal. Ivy: You're in need of some discipline! Ivy grabs onto Natsu and launches her into the air while holding her in place with alchemy. Ivy: I'll teach you to behave! “TEACH US!” Sonata cheered enthusiastically. Ivy sends pieces of Valentine through Natsu before combining them together, slamming her down to the ground, then reattaching them to her sword. Ivy: Satisfied? “VERY satisfied!” The Dazzlings said in unison. Rarity buried her face in her hooves. “Why? Why did he invite them?! WHY?!” “Because i knew this would be hilarious,” Deadman’s disembodied voice answered smugly. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ The main group was torn on their thoughts. On one hand they respected ivy as a worrier and someone who wants to stop an evil like soul edge, but on the other hand she is willing to destroy anything and everyone connected to soul edge. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Black Orchid (*Cues: Black Orchid's Theme - Killer Instinct SNES*) Orchid delivers a 19 hit combo to Cinder Annoncer: Killer Combo! Wiz: The government spy code-named Black Orchid is a complete mystery. Her past, training and real name are so secret not even she knows most of it. Boomstick (and Twilight): How the hell does that work?! “Maybe self-inflicted amnesia?" Rainbow suggested that she munched on her snack. “I've read a few comics where the hero does that to hide info from the enemy…” “How does that work out?” Fluttershy asked. “Eh,” Rainbow shrugged. “Depends on the situation, sometimes it works, sometimes it comes back to bite them.” Wiz: What we do know is, she's a killer. (*Cues: Killer Instinct - Orchid Theme*) Rainbow smirked. “Now that’s a theme I’d like hear when I’m kicking butt!” Wiz: Among her limited history, she is confirmed to be sister to Jago, a prominent fighter from Tibet. Orchid's origin must share similarities, so she is most likely a practitioner of Chinese martial arts such as kung fu. “Huh? That’s neat,” muttered Adagio. “What is?” asked Twilight. “Recently Sunset has been taking martial art lessons,” answered Aria with a shrug. “She’s been taking them ever since she’s been watching this show with her friends.” “What show is that?” Asked Starlight. “Don’t know, her friends don’t trust us to be invited to watch,” muttered a sad Sonata. “Even if Sunset invites us.” Background Real name: Unknown Height: 170 cm / 5'7" Weight: 56.7 kg / 125 Ibs Age: 24 Fighting Styles: Chinese martial arts Likely Tibetan (since she was Jago's sister) Secretive government spy Prefers tonfa over lightsabers? (*Cues: Killer Instinct 2 - Kim Wu Theme*) Boomstick: Orchid's weapons of choice are heavy Chinese tonfa... made of lasers! “Lasers make everything awesome!” Rainbow, Pinkie, and Sonata cheered. Wiz: Apparently whoever she works for has figured out how to make light sabers; and Orchid wielded these early in her career before upgrading to laser tonfa. Boomstick: Tonfa are short and strong, designed for quick damage, perfect for Orchid since she is incredibly skilled in fast, close-range combat. Her other set of weapons are called T.N.A.. Tonfa Laser aura Length: 38 cm / 15 in Short range weapons Can emit fire or electricity For Okinawan martial arts Originally a handle for grinding grain Popularized as police nightsticks Wiz: Well, actually... Boomstick: I mean, just look at what she's wearing! It's not as if she trying to hide anything! Man, I wish I was that jumpsuit. “I wish I HAD that jumpsuit!” Adagio giggled, imagining the reaction she get out of a certain bacon-haired girl back in the human world. “Mind if we join in on that action?” asked a smirking Aria and laughing Sonata. Wiz: *clears throat* Orchid prefers speed over strength, with quick rapid strikes. Some moves even defy physics. Boomstick: What is she, some sort of witch? Wiz: Absolutely! Orchid´s best weapon is her trove of spells. Most useful is the Fire Cat, a transfiguration spell which morphs her body into an intangible feline of flame. “Wish I could do that,” Rainbow said, pouting at the screen. Boomstick: Aww, I wanna pet her! But I can't... cause... you know... the burning… “Poor Boomstick,” muttered Fluttershy. Moves Tonfa Fire Fire Cat Flick Flack Spinning Sword Lasaken Air-Buster (*Cues: Killer Instinct - Main Theme*) Wiz: She also uses magic in here No Mercies, finishers which can be used after an enemy is weakened. When not using her tonfa to incinerate people, she can transform them into a helpless frog. Boomstick: Smash 'em! Smash 'em! YES!! “NO!” Fluttershy cried out. “That poor froggy…” “Eww…” Rarity winced. Wiz: But she has one more weapon in her arsenal... or rather two: Boomstick: Her Fun Bags of Destruction! And you just thought I was being a pig earlier, but really whipping out the girls causes an instant heart attack to whoever views them. Orchid zips open her vest and reveals her breasts (off-screen) to T.J. Combo, who then falls over dead. TJ Combo: Whoah! Orchid: Yeah! The video was paused for a moment, courtesy of Spike, as everyone took in what they’d just witnessed… Twilight, Starlight, Rarity, Applejack and Fluttershy went slack-jawed, while Rainbow Dash, Spike, Pinkie Pie, and the Dazzlings all fell over in fits of laughter. “That… is the most… RIDICULOUS thing I've ever seen!” Rainbow gasped between laughs. “She j-j-just FLASHED HIM! And he died, just like that!” Sonata cackled, holding onto Pinkie for support. “I-I CAN’T BREATHE!!” Spike shouted as he held his stomach. “MY-MY GUT’S KILLING ME!!” “BEST. FINISHER. EVER!” Adagio shouted. No Mercies Shocker Scorcher Frog Squash Heart Attack Boomstick: I now know the way I want to die. Wiz: I never thought I'd see a lethal set of mammary glands! Boomstick: But you'd think it'd only work on people, right? NOPE! Her super-boobs can kill humans, robots, aliens, a dinosaur, and even a walking skeleton who's missing the one bone that matters. “How beautiful are those boobs?!” Sonata asked, shocked that it not only worked on people, but completely different species as well. “I must discover their secrets…” “Please stop,” Rarity begged the former siren who ignored her. Wiz: There is only one possible explanation for this. Her breasts must be so impossibly, unnaturally large that no brain can process the shock of seeing them. Even while female brains are immune to the sexual shock, they will grudgingly forfeit out of jealousy. “Damn,” the former sirens said. Boomstick: Heh-heh! Oh, she'll be crying into a tub of ice cream tonight! “... shut up,” growled Rarity, the joke hitting a little too close to home. Wiz: Black Orchid entered the first Killer Instinct tournament, intent to take down the evil UltraTech corporation from within. Boomstick: While she had some trouble with ranged characters, she eventually defeated the 2,000-year-old, and might I add, CHEAP-AS-HELL WARLORD Eyedol, winning her the whole tournament. Feats & Faults Skilled in close-range Ultra Combos Won first Killer Instinct tournament Defeated Eyedol Fought Gargos in the past Self-raised Pitiful ranged skill Traded lightsabers for tonfa-what?!? Wiz: Orchid is clearly a force to be reckoned with. Orchid unleashes a 37-hit Ultra Combo on Fulgore. Announcer(andPinkie):ULTRAAAAAAAAAA COMBOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! Orchid: Yeah! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ It was a tough choice for most of them but everyone came to a decision. Rarity, Spike, Starlight were rooting Orchid as everyone but the Dazzlings rooted for Ivy. The former sirens were neutral for um, reasons. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Wiz: Alright, our combatants are set. Let’s end this debate once and for all. Boomstick: It’s time for a DDDEEAATTTHHHHBBBBAAAATTTLLLEEEEEEEEE. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Death Battle (*Cues: Going To Where The Wind Blows - Soul Calibur*) Ivy is standing on a platform atop a large body of water when Orchid jumps down from an off-screen helicopter. Ivy leaps backward. Ivy: Get lost! FIGHT! “That’s one way to start a fight,” Applejack said. “Meh. gets to the point,” Rainbow Dash said, shrugging. (*Cues: The Book of Ivy - fan remix of No Turning Back - Soul Calibur II*) Orchid fires two tonfa blasts at Ivy, who knocks them away with the Valentine, then uses her sword to unleash long-range attacks on Orchid, who blocks them with her tonfa. Orchid then uses Fire Cat to phase through another Valentine attack and lunges toward Ivy, unleashing a Master Combo on her, ending with a fiery knee knocking Ivy into the air. “Damn,” Aria, Rainbow Dash and Applejack said at the same time. KI Announcer/Pinkie Pie: Master Combo! Ivy lands and blocks an aerial kick by Orchid, catching her off-guard and allowing her to unleash a combo of her own. After kicking Orchid away, she catches her with the Valentine, then holds her by the throat with it while putting her foot on her. Ivy: Does it hurt? “Yes Mommy. It hurts soooo good~,” Sonata moaned in her seat. “O-Oh my,” Fluttershy said, hiding her blushing face. Orchid uses Fire Cat to evade it and moves further back. Ivy uses the Valentine, but Orchid catches it with her tonfa, pulls Ivy towards her, then kicks her in the stomach. She then unleashes Heart Attack on Ivy. “It’s the final flash!” Sonata cheered. “Wrong character Sonata.” Pinkie corrected. However, Ivy is unaffected and laughs, then proceeds to do the same to her opponent. Orchid, dumbstruck by her opponent's superior breast size, throws down her tonfa in frustration and jealousy. “Woah! Guess her’s are bigger.” Adagio commented with both admiration and respect. (*Cues: Eyedol's Theme - Killer Instinct*) Ivy uses the opening to attack, but after landing a few hits, Orchid uses a Combo Breaker to reverse it before Ivy catches her tonfa with the Valentine. KI Announcer: C-C-C-Combo Breaker! Ivy strikes Orchid into the air, then uses her alchemy to hold her in place. Ivy: Spread apart! “OH COME ON!” Rarity screamed to the sky. “Oh yes~,” the Dazzlings said with blushing faces. Ivy then unleashes Grand Alchemy, sending Valentine's pieces through Orchid, who then falls to the ground, dazed. Ivy: Is that it? “I’m good for a few rounds. I need to practice to corner a certain bacon-haired girl,” Adagio cooed as everyone blushed around her. Spike was confused as he asked, “What does she-” “I’LL TELL YOU WHEN YOU’RE OLDER!!” Twilight yelled, blushing up a storm. (*Cues: Killer Instinct - Prog Metal Remix*) Ivy sends Valentine through the ground to finish her opponent, but Orchid uses Fire Cat to avoid it, then unleashes an Ultra Combo on Ivy, ending with the two in mid-air as Orchid kicks her away. KIAnnouncer:ULTRAAAAAAAAAA COMBOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! As Ivy is about to hit the ground, Orchid uses Shocker before she hits the ground, keeping her stunned when she finally lands. Orchid walks up to the stunned Ivy and then transforms her into a frog with her tonfa before jumping on Ivy, squishing her. “Froggy, NOOO!!!” Fluttershy yelled. Orchid: Yeah! K.O.! Ivy is shown twitching in her frog form before dying as Orchid stands atop a platform nearby. When Jago jumps behind her, Orchid turns around and uses Heart Attack, presumably killing him as he falls off the platform into the water below. “Guess she got two victories today,” Rainbow said as everyone chuckled. Results (*Cues: Killer Instinct (2013) - Character Selection Theme*) Boomstick: I feel sorry for the guy that has to clean that up. “Agreed,” Rarity said, feeling a little queasy. Wiz: Orchid's an unstoppable force. Her win against Eyedol proves her incredible fighting abilities. See, 2,000 years ago, not even the most powerful armies in the world could take down Eyedol, and yet Orchid did so singlehandedly. “Not so bad for a girl who can flash her udders. She could probably take on Tirek,” Applejack said, tipping her hat up. Boomstick: But since Ivy's jugs are so wonderfully huge, Orchid's flash finisher was meaningless. “And what fine jugs they are,” Aria said, licking her lips. Wiz: Ivy's cup size is officially chartered as G or quadruple-D. By measuring Orchid's waist and chest to scale, it appears hers are sized F, or triple-D, one size smaller than Ivy's. “Are we really using math to judge a woman’s teat size?” Twilight asked with a flat stare. “It is important, Sparkle. It’s for science,” Adagio said without remorse as she stared at the screen with a perverse grin. Boomstick: Oh, I have an extra “D” I could've given her. “Celestia Damn it!” screamed Rarity. Wiz: Too late. Besides, the fight ultimately came down to long-range vs. short-range combat. While Orchid has no equivalent to Ivy's Snake Sword, her Fire Cat can get in close by passing through attacks. Starlight had a thoughtful look as she muttered, “I would love to have a spell like that.” Boomstick: And tonfa are designed to block attacks and get in close. Once Orchid's in, there's no stopping her. Wiz: Plus, Ivy has no means of countering Orchid's transfigurations. Even her link to Soul Edge is useless, since it does not pertain to other magic. “Hmm… kinda like when Starscream tried to nail me with a blast meant only for electronics...” Rainbow mused. “Only… y’know, with magic” Boomstick: It was a good fight, but in the end, Ivy croaked. Sonata giggled at Boomstick’s joke along with Pinkie. Wiz: The winner is Black Orchid. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Boomstick: Next time on Death Battle. The group see three spacecrafts flying in space….and are piloted by anthropomorphic animals. Fox: We're heading out! All aircraft report. Rabbit: This is Peppy, all systems go! Toad: Don't forget me! A fourth one appears behind them. Pheasant: Slippy, what are you doing?! Hurry up! Another ship, but appears to be different,flew towards them. Toad: Don't worry. The unfamiliar ship also has a pilot. Green rabbit: Attention all hands, battlestations. Fox: Huh? ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Adagio and Aria shivered in fear when they recognized that ship. “Oh no, not this again!” “Oh...my… gosh!” Sonata squeed, smiling widely as she started cartwheeling around the room. “It’s him! They’re bringing him in!” “Uh, actually… we should probably get back to the human world…” Aria nervously stuttered as she and Adagio tried backing away. … only to be stopped by Rarity, who had an unnerving grin on her face. “Oh, nonsense girls!” She said as she pushed them back towards the tv. “Your friends seems oh-SO eager to watch the next one! It’d be impolite to deny her the joy of seeing it!” Adagio started to sweat. “Oh, we don’t have to be here for th-” “Oh but you should! You very much should! I. INSIST.” Rarity demanded, her horn glowing menacingly. Aria looked to the rest of the group for support… only to see them cowering behind Twilight, except Sonata, who was too busy bouncing around the room to notice. Adagio let out a sigh and said, “Fine. Let’s just look at the dumb box.” The ponies and dragon walked over to the glowing box, waiting for the glow to stop. Once it died down, Spike opened the box and said, “Huh?” “Is something wrong, Spike?” Rarity asked, concerned. “Yeah, what’s up? Did we get anything cool?” Rainbow Dash asked in a hopeful tone. “Well, we got the usual comics,” Spike said pulling out a stack of comics. The group groaned but took took the comics as Spike reached inside the box once more. “We also got a few figures,” Spike said, holding a few mini figures of Ivy and Black Orchid. Rainbow took one of each as the rest all split the rest between them. “And here’s a couple of wrapped packages for…. Adagio and Aria?” Spike said confused, pulling out two wrapped packages and giving them to their respective owners. “Not like I’m gonna turn down free stuff,” Aria said, removing the paper from the package. “This could be interesting,” Adagio said, ripping the wrapping off to reveal what was inside as she began to grin. In her hooves were an exact replica of Ivy’s outfit in Adagio’s hooves as Aria was holding a jumpsuit similar to Black Orchid. The sister were grinning as they thought trying them out once they got home or in Adagio’s case, who she’ll try it for. In another place A red and blonde haired girl was doing her homework in peace when she suddenly felt scared yet aroused. Confused, she continued with her work as she ignored the warning her body was giving her. Back in Equestria “Oh, I’m gonna have fun,” Adagio said, giggling to herself. Twilight, wanting to save herself from being questioned, said, “Next episode. NEXT EPISODE, NOW.” ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ CHAPTER END! NEXT TIME FOX MCCLOUD VS BUCKY O’HARE!
Terminator vs Robocop.It was the start of a new day as the birds were singing and the flowers were blooming. On days like this, fillies would be playing outside with their friends. It was a perfect day for everyone to enjoy. “I OVERSLEPT.” Except for one purple dragon who was running down the castle halls to the viewing room. The reason why Spike overslept was that before he went to bed last night, he stayed up reading some of the comics he got from the box. As he got closer to the viewing room door, Spike saw that the door was starting to open. He stopped in front of the open door just as his friends started to exit the room. “Did you watch the episode, Twilight?” Spike asked, hoping that they didn’t start it. Twilight blinked owlishly while looking at her assistant/brother and asked, “Why would I be, Twilight? “Um, cause your a princess and we live in the crystal castle,” Spike said, confused by the purple mare’s answer. “I don’t live in a castle,” Twilight said, oddly cheerful. “Of course you live in a castle,” Spike said, waving his arms around. “Take a look around you, Spikey boy,” Twilight said smiling. Spike looked around to see that he wasn’t in the crystal castle but in some normal looking basement. He even saw a nice couch, table of snacks and a bunch of soda there. Turning back around, Spike didn’t see Twilight and her friends but the familiar looking fireball that just started to annoy him. “NOW IT’S TIME FOR A GUYS NIGHT OUT,” Deadman screamed causing a giant flash of light. Spike was blinded for a moment but once the light died down he found himself on the couch. “CAN’T FORGET THE OTHER PLAYERS,” Deadman said causing smaller flashes to happen with popping noises as Spike covered his eyes. After a few moments, Spike looked up to see Shining Armor, Flash Sentry, Big Mac, Thorax, a scared Sunburst and a very annoyed Discord. “Why,” Spike started to say as Deadman’s fireball form grew larger. “I BROUGHT YOU HERE TO WATCH THIS BALL DROPPING, TESTOSTERONE FILLED EPISODE OF DEATH BATTLE. So have fun, cause mayhem and eat tacos,” Deadman said as he disappeared. The ponies sat in silence until Shining asked, “What’s going on?” “Just Deadman doing his own thing,” Discord said unamused while tapping his claw against the couch armrest. “Deadman?” Shining, Sunburst, Thorax, Flash and Big Mac asked at the same time. “He's the one who gave us the Death Battle episodes and box,” Spike explained causing Shining to nod. The others looked slightly confused by this. “Death Battle? Isn't that the show you were talking about, your highness?” Flash asked, hearing how his superior was talking about it one day. “Yes, Flash it's that show. But why would he want us to be here?” Shining asked, getting a bunch of shrugs. “Probably wants us to watch the next episode,” Discord and Spike said at the same time. “The sooner we watch it, the sooner we can get out of here.” “You sure about this Spike?” Thorax asked, unsure of the situation. “That guy is crazy but he won’t hurt anyone unless he’s angry. Trust me, I’ve seen him angry,” Discord said while examining his talons. “Ok, well let’s watch it then,” Sunburst said, calming down a bit. “Ya I need to go, I was on my way to see my Marefriend right before I was taken to this place,” muttered an annoyed Flash. Spike tried to grab the remote but Discord snatched it and pressed the play button. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Interlude (*Cues: Invader - Jim Johnston*) Boomstick: Sci-fi movies have taught me two very important things. One: I want my own lightsaber. “A glowing sword would be pretty kickass…” Flash smiled. “I know right?” said Spike imagining saving Rarity with a lightsaber Boomstick: and Two: The future blows. “Tell me about it,” muttered Spike still having nightmares of all of the alternate timelines that were caused by Starlight meddling with time. Wiz: It's unavoidable, the warrior of the next millennium is the machine, such as The Terminator, the time traveling metal assassin. That caused the mortal members of the group to shudder at such a terrifying name. Boomstick: And RoboCop, Detroit's cyborg defender. This was quick to catch Shining armor and Flash’s attention. Wiz: These mechanized combatants have fought before, but never in a no-holds-barred, one-on-one duel to the death. Boomstick: Or without brand restrictions. "Wait. These two fought before?" Thorax asked. Boomstick: He's Wiz and I'm Boomstick. Wiz: And it's our job to analyze their weapons, armor and skills to find out who would win... a Death Battle. Terminator (*Cues: The Terminator (1984) - Main Theme*) Wiz: In the distant future of 2004. The government deployed the world's first automated defense network, Skynet, to keep everybody on the planet safe and happy. Everyone chuckled at that. “Don't you just love it when sci-fi films try to predict the future?” Sunburst smirked. “So we created Skynet 12 years ago huh?” Flash scoffed. “Funny how we missed that little event.” “This is what happens when we ride our hoverboards too much.” Added Thorax, causing the rest of the group to laugh. Boomstick: So. Skynet used the planet's nuclear arsenal to annihilate most of humanity and take over the world. “....oops.” Big Mac deadpanned sarcastically. “And this is what happens when you try to play god with machines” Shining stated, not noticing Spike nervously glance at the door leading to Twilight’s lab... Boomstick: The age of machines had begun. (*Cues: A Day In The Life - Terminator 3*) Wiz: To combat the remaining human resistance, Skynet developed a specialized breed of robotic soldier. Boomstick: Affectionately called the Terminator. A human skull gets crushed under a metallic foot The camera moves up and reveals the first combatant; a humanoid, metallic, robot covered in a metal exoskeleton, human-shaped feet, a head that resembles a human skull , and wielding some kind of advanced looking weapon. “Gulp.. well that’s quite intimidating,” muttered Sunburst while adjusting his glasses. “Eeyup!” agreed Big Mac along with everyone else. Wiz: Standing 6'2" and weighing almost 400 lbs, the T-850 terminator is a cybernetic organism - living tissue surrounding a hyper-alloy endoskeleton. This made the perfect disguise, capable of infiltrating enemy ranks with its human visage. “Huh kind of like how my People use to do things,” commented Thorax remembering his race’s main strategy when it came to things.. Boomstick: Basically the whole point of the Terminator was to blend in with normal people, and then kill them. Yes, because two time powerlifting champion ARNOLD SCHWARZENEGGER is totally your average guy! Once an image of a young Arnold was shown on screen the guys couldn't help but try to compare their muscles to his just to realize how much they come up short… well except Discord who could turn buff anytime he wanted. “Cheater…” the rest of the group thought, glaring at the grinning chaos spirit. Wiz: Sure, but only the Model 101 Class looked like that. The Terminator has hundreds of different possible faces. Boomstick: What was that one designed for? Attracting women and making men feel inadequate? Guy in hallway: Damn! “Anyone else suddenly feel the need to work out?” Spike asked. “Nope!” said Big Mac with a grin while flexing his muscles. “Meh my Marefriend doesn't care if i have muscles so i’m not that torn up about it,” said Flash Sentry with a shrug. (*Cues: I'll Be Back - Terminator 2: Judgement Day*) Wiz: Using time displacement equipment, the Terminator was sent back in time to stop Skynet's greatest rival, John Connor, leader of the human resistance. “Uge! Not more time shenanigans!” groaned out Spike. “You ok their Spike?” asked a worried Thorax, wondering what was wrong with his friend. The young drake took a calming breath. “It’s ok I just really hate time travel after the stuff me and Twilight went through.” Boomstick: This model was first sent to super early abort John Connor, then protect John Connor, then protect John Connor again, and then blow up this bitch. Terminator: You are terminated. The Terminator blows up himself and the T-X using his hydrogen fuel cell. “Sweeeet~!” awed out Discord while wearing some 3-D glasses. (*Cues: Trust Me - Terminator 2: Judgement Day*) Wiz: The T-850 is powered by twin hydrogen fuel cells. A single cell can last up to 120 years, but extensive damage may rupture the cell to critical condition. “Hmmm I wonder if Twily could make a safer version of those things.” muttered Shining. Boomstick: And it blows up like a small hydrogen bomb. Wiz: Similar to the explosion that brought down the Hindenburg. Boomstick: Luckily for Arnie, he can ditch a damaged cell before that happens, and he works just fine with just only one left, like Lance Armstrong, without the steroids. “Ha!” laughed Discord the only one to get the joke. Background Cyberdyne Research Systems Series 850 Model 101 Infiltration Combat Unit Manufacturer: Skynet Height: 1.88 m / 6'2" Weight: 172 kg / 380lbs Core component: Coltan Power source: 2 hydrogen fuel cells Always comes back Wiz: The Terminator is programmed with an abundance of subroutine data, including Skynet's extensive logs on all combat and weaponry throughout Earth's history. This even includes data on all previous T-800 models. Through this, he technically has more experience and skill than any human being could ever possibly achieve. Most of the group went wide eyed at this and ones like shining armor couldn't help but worry at the thought of something like the terminator attacking his loved one’s. Programming Routines Adaptability Learning machine Adapts to human behavior through observation, interaction & questions Combat & weaponry Anything within Skynet's global database Group Infiltration Human anatomy Voice mimicry Basic psychology (*Cues: Terminator 3: Rise of the Machines - T3*) Boomstick: But while he's a master in all weaponry, he does have his favorites. In the future, the Terminator wields an M-27 Phased Plasma Rifle, which is too heavy and powerful for any ordinary person to use. When the time period doesn't have any space guns lying around, his weapons of choice include a Hardballer Longslide pistol, a 12-gauge Franchi shotgun, a portable M79 Grenade Launcher, and the beautiful M134 mini-gun. Oh man, just looking at it makes me feel wonderful pants feelings. The group was left jaw dropped at the arsenal that the Terminator wielded. “Is it wrong that i’m feeling the same thing as Boomstick?” asked Spike in a daze. “It’d be weird if you didn’t,” said Discord. Arsenal M-27 Phased Plasma Rifle Bull pup configuration Helium plasma 40 watt range Too heavy for humans AMT Hardballer .45 Longslide Magazine: 7 rounds Laserlock sight Franchi SPAS-12 Shotgun Cartridge: 12 gauge Magazine: 8 + 1 rounds Pump-action & semi-auto options M79 Grenade Launcher 40x46mm grenades 6 rounds/min Max range: 400 m / 1311 ft Weight: 2.9 kg / 6.5 lbs Handheld GE M134 Minigun Caliber: 7.62x51mm NATO Rate of fire: 2,000 - 6,000 rpm Max range: 1,000m / 3,200 ft Weight: 38.6 kg / 85 lbs Wiz: Speaking of feelings, the Terminator is a learning machine, adapting to human behavior through observation and interaction. It can even learn to feel genuinely sad, which is odd since Skynet designed it to be a merciless mass murderer. “That’s… pretty dumb,” muttered out Sunburst not really seeing the point of that feature. “Maybe it helps it blend in?” suggested Thorax. John Connor: Jesus, you were gonna kill that guy! Terminator: Of course, I'm a Terminator. “It’s kind of in the name kid,” mocked Discord. John Connor: Just put up your hand and say "I swear I won't kill anyone". Terminator: I swear I will not kill anyone. (Shoots a security guard in the knees) He'll live. “Well… he’s not lying I guess,” muttered out Flash. (*Cues: Helicopter Chase - Terminator 2: Judgement Day*) Boomstick: Sad or not, The Terminator is a beast in combat. He's even taken down superior models like the next-gen T-900's, the nearly invincible T-1000, and even the T-X; which is actually an anti-Terminator. “So wait it killed it’s own terminator?” asked Shining in awe. “So cool!” said Spike. Wiz: The Terminator is a master marksman, with advance analysis, calculative, and observational tools. He can survive massive blows, power shortages, and getting dragged through an entire city. Plus, after the last T-800 was melted in a steel mill, Skynet upgraded his titanium exoskeleton to coltan, which can withstand extreme temperatures over 3000*C. Feats Smashed through a building Has tricked humans and machines alike Killed the technically superior T-900s, T-1000, and T-X Escaped liquid nitrogen freeze twice Can lift several cars Program survived and revived at T3 Successfully killed John Connor Boomstick: Why even bother making new Terminators? The T-850 is clearly the best. “Agreed,” said the group. Terminator: Hasta-La-Vista, baby. He shoots the frozen T-1000, shattering it. “I guess you can say he was put on ICE,” said Discord with a pair of Sunglasses while the rest of the group groaned in frustration from the pun. “YEAAAAAAHHHHH!” “Thanks Deadman,” thanked Discord. “No prob.” (*Cues: It's Over, Good Bye - Terminator 2: Judgment Day*) Wiz: Each Terminator is not unique, made by assembly for quick deployment. To save time, Skynet forgoes high end software protection, leaving the Terminator easily hackable. In fact, the one T-850 who protected Connor on Judgement day was reprogrammed not once, but four separate times. Just screams lazy, lazy design. The Terminator scrolls through different phrases to say and selects one. Terminator: Fuck you asshole. While most of the group were snickering at the scene shining was just shaking his head at the thought of ANY army leaving such a blaring weakness on the back bone of their army. Weakness Easily hackable Detectable by dogs Dangerous power source Sometimes defeated by humans Vulnerable to precise attacks from behind Worst fear: Hydraulic presses (*Cues: Terminator 2: Judgement Day - Main Theme*) Boomstick: But it's a little hard to hack something that can kill you with one hand in twenty million different ways. The Terminator is one of the deadliest assassins in movie history. If you get in his way, don't bother running, you're already dead. “Omae wa mō shindeiru,” muttered Discord while having some REALLY thick eyebrows and being really buff. “... am I the only one who just felt his balls drop just now?” asked Shining Armor wondering why the simple line sounded more manly than dragons and hoofball combined. “Nope!” said Big mac with a slightly deeper voice. Terminator: I'll be back. He walks out of the police station, only to come back driving a car right through the front door. “Huh well what do you know? He did come back,” commented Spike. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ While discord was impressed by the machine's ability to cause chaos through the timeline itself the rest of the group where just glad that the terminator didn't exist in their world. “My money's on the terminator he just seems like the best choice,” said Thorax. Getting nods of agreement from Spike and Big Mac. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ RoboCop (*Cues: RoboCop 1987 - Rock Shop *) Wiz: Alex J.Murphy was a good police officer with a good family, as with many good cops, that all changed when he was transferred to Detroit, Michigan. What began as a routine patrol through the city became the most important moment of Murphy's life: his death. A shotgun-wielding thug blows Murphy's hand off. Boomstick/everyone but Discord: HOLY SHIT! As Murphy screams, he is repeatedly shot by multiple thugs wielding shotguns. “Uge… I think i’m going to be sick,” muttered out a greened face Spike. Boomstick: Damn! That guy can eat more bullets than 50 Cent. (*Cues: RoboCop 1987 - Across the Board*) Wiz: Murphy would have been six feet under, if the mega corporation Omni Consumer Products had not stepped in. By privatizing Detroit's police force, OCP technically owned Murphy's corpse. “What!?” screamed the group when they heard that little tidbit of info. Background Real name: Alex J. Murphy Height: 1.83m/6'0 Weight: 155kg/342lbs Police Districts: Detroit and Delta City Codename: Beta One Daily Upkeep: $12589.17 Programmed with high-level USA police training Boomstick: That doesn't seem legal at all. “I’ll say,” growled out Shining Armor. Thinking that if someone did that to his men would get his blood boiling. Wiz: With unchecked crime on the rise, OCP's...uhh...forward thinking executive, Bob Morton proposed a bailout plan so ridiculously absurd, it just might work. (*Cues: RoboCop 1987 - Rock Shop*) Boomstick: They would rebuild Murphy. Better, stronger, with less flexibility, which of course, means robo parts. The result was one bad mother fucker: RoboCop. (Multiple scenes of RoboCop stopping crimes are shown.) The group look in awe at Robocop’s war on crime, even Discord look impressed at the metal warrior's battle to protect the peace. Bob: What are your prime objectives? RoboCop: Serve the public trust, protect the innocent, uphold the law. (He shoots through a female hostage's dress to nail a criminal in the crotch) The entire group winced at this while their hooves/claws went to their crotches. “Heheheh… Head shot,” chuckled the disembodied voice of Deadman. Boomstick: With the durability of a tank, and the firepower of a one man army, RoboCop nearly annihilated all of Detroit's street crime in just a couple of days. The man was unstoppable. Wiz: But was he man, or machine? Male Officer: This guy is really good. Female Officer: He's not a guy; he's a machine. “But he still has the soul of a man who want’s to protect,” said Flash, glaring at the female officer. (*Cues: RoboCop - The Dream*) Wiz: RoboCop is 99% artificial, but he relies on the most complicated known machinery, a human brain. Boomstick: Even after OCP tried to make him their own personal robo-pet, the man called Murphy still lived. That got some grins from the group, proud that Murphy was still in fighting the good fight. Wiz: With no family, a contorted public image, and the constant threat of deactivation by his corporate owners, the struggle to regain his humanity would consume Murphy's every waking moment, while also fighting crime, and that's just his good days. “Poor guy…” muttered Sunburst along with everyone. “Eeyup,” agreed Big Mac with a look of pity. (*Cues: Unknown Theme*) Boomstick: Fortunately, his cutting edge arsenal makes locking up the bad guys the easiest part. Housed in his nifty right leg is the custom Auto-9 machine pistol, one of the most powerful hand cannons ever made. In his left leg, he's got several tactical ordnance grenades, each with adjustable power levels. Wiz: At level three, a single ordnance can annihilate a metal security door. So just imagine what maximum level ten can do. “*chuckle*” laughed Discord liking the sound of those grenades. Boomstick: If he needs a bit more firepower, Murphy has an attachable Weapon Arm; complete with machine gun, flamethrower, and anti-tank smart bomb missile, and for those extra special moments, there's the Cobra Assault Cannon, which goes boom, and then there's no more anything. The group stared wide eyed at the vast arsenal that put the terminator's to shame. Arsenal Auto-9 Pistol Magazine: 50 rounds Standard 3 round bursts Tactical Ordnance Triggered "sticky" grenades 10 charge levels Options: Explosive, inflatable sack, electro-field Flightpack Sub-sonic speed Separate battery pack Can double as a recharge station Weapon Arm Calico M950A machine gun Magazine: 100 rounds Max range: 274 m / 900 ft Flamethrower Max range: 46 m / 150 ft Smart Bomb Anti-tank weapon Missile properties Cobra Assault Cannon 40mm armor-piercing high-explosive incendiary rounds (RoboCop shoots the ED-209 with the Cobra Assault Cannon and the top of it explodes) Sitcom Guy: I´d buy THAT for a dollar. “Me too!” cheered Spike. “Me three!” agreed Thorax, just as excited as his friend. (The legs of the defeated ED-209 fall over and then twitch) (*Cues: Unknown Theme*) Wiz: He also has a subsonic jet pack, which helps him jump sharks. Boomstick: I...I don't even... William Ray Morgan: Where's your sense of humor?! RoboCop: Right here. (RoboCop raises his fist and punches him in the face) Boomstick:...Jesus Christ “Ha! Now that's a one liner!” laughed Shining Armor. Wiz: Murphy is also equipped with state of the art hardware and software, Including a thermograph, a video recorder and a terminal strip for collecting data... Boomstick: Or for ripping out throats! Just look at that thing!! “Ouch…” winced Sunburst while rubbing his neck after seeing Robocop rip a guy's throat out with a USB flash drive. Wiz: No wonder Detroit's falling apart! All their USB flash drives can double as shivs! “Meh almost anything can be made into a shiv if you're creative enough,” bragged Discord gaining some worried looks from the rest of the group. Boomstick: Murphy´s armor is made up of carbo-ceramic-reinforced titanium, with laminated Kevlar, which basically means it'll stop pretty much anything. It's like the Pepperidge farm bread packaging of armour! RoboCop: I´m composed of titanium. I don't believe you are. (Draws the Auto nine) Your move. The entire SWAT team scatters. This caused the group to bust out laughing. “Hahahaha! This guy is awessome!” laughed Flash Sentry wiping some tears from his eye’s. (*Cues: RoboCop 1987 - Rock Shop*) Boomstick: Each leg has two rambolts, which can anchor him into the ground to stop fleeing motorboats and speeding cars. Wiz: He also has a targeting system so precise, he can catch and even shoot bullets out of thin air. “I've only heard a FEW unicorns in history that had such accuracy,” muttered out Shining Armor in awe Boomstick: Expert marksman? More like master of the impossible! Then group was shocked and enraged when they see a criminal holding a baby hostage as RoboCop is held back at the risk of the baby in jeopardy. Criminal: Don't try to follow me! RoboCop: We won't. Criminal: The baby is going with me! RoboCop: No. Criminal: I´ll kill it man! I´ll do it! I´ll fucking kill it! “Coward!” hissed out Spike as his pupils started to slit. And Thorax started to hiss like his old changeling self. RoboCop: We can't have that. “Buck him up!” cheered Big Mac in a rare form of rage. (He uses his advanced targeting to calculates the ricochet angle from a nearby steel door, then fires, hitting the criminal in the head, allowing his partner to rescue the baby) The group cheered at Murphy’s skill and for rescuing the child. Software and hardware Terminal Strip Rambolt Armor Carbo-ceramic reinforced titanium armor Laminated kevlar Thermograph Complex targeting systems Voice stress analyzer Video and audio recorder Wiz: Murphy has defeated plenty of technically superior combat machines, and endured dozens of seemingly fatal situations. He's strong enough to lift a 10-ton armored door, tough enough to survive a bazooka, brave enough to plunge into a giant nuclear plant monster thing and kill it from inside...? Boomstick: Note to self: remember to weed garden. “Agreed,” muttered Discord in agreement as he wrote that down to remember later. Wiz: And if that's not crazy enough for you, he's even rescued Sting from the Four Horsemen in WCW wrestling. Yes. This is real. “That is the coolest thing i’ve heard… of all time.” stated Shining Armor in awe. Feats Defeated ED-209, RoboCop 2, Deathspore, ED-260A, and RoboCable Tanked a building busting bomb Survived a Class-1 bio-toxin bomb Lifted a 10 ton armored door Survived a 3000 PSI hydraulic press Can catch a bullet in mid-air Rescued Sting from the Four Horsemen in WCW...seriously (*Cues: Unknown Theme*) Boomstick: Murphy may be a walking tank, but he also moves like one. He's SO SLOW!! This caused Flash Sentry to wince at the pathetic Speed that Robocop was “running” Wiz: His main function is to chase the bad guys! You´d think OCP would´ve prioritized running legs over, say, his Frisbee skills. Also, Murphy´s battery can only last about 24 hours without recharging, but consistent damage can quickly drain his power. In prolonged combat with someone his equal, Murphy is in constant danger of power failure. Boomstick: To top it off, his human parts add extra vulnerability, which is stupid because it means he can even get a common cold and... (RoboCop then sneezes what looks like a bolt of electricity, which hits the ground) “HOLY CRAP!” yelled a surprised Sunburst almost falling out of his chair. (*Cues: RoboCop 3 - Robo Saves Lewis*) Boomstick: FUCKING SNEEZE LIGHTING BOLTS OUT OF HIS FACE! It doesn't matter how many flaws he's got! RoboCop is a badass! “Agreed,” said everyone. Weaknesses Requires daily power recharge Slow mobility on foot Conflicts his own programming Not programmed for martial arts Mechanical heart weak to impacts Cannot escape liquid nitrogen freezing on his own Possesses some vulnerable human organics Owner: Nice shooting son. What's your name? RoboCop: Murphy. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ The group was getting excited for the battle. “Me and Flash are rooting for Robocop,” said Shining as everyone could understand why two royal guards would root for Robocop. “I’m going to stay neutral on this one,” stated Discord. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Wiz: All right. The combatants are set. Let's end this debate once and for all. Boomstick: It's time for a robo Death Battle! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Death Battle The scene is in a busy city (presumably Detroit). Terminator enters the area via time travel in a gun store. Salesman: Holy shit! Hey, where'd you come from? How'd you do that? Terminator: Give me your guns... and your clothes. Now! Salesman: Whoa, hey buddy, that's not really my thing. Hey... what are you doing? Don't touch that! *screams* Suddenly, an explosion occurs, blowing up most of the store and killing the salesman. “... was it really necessary to blow up the store?” asked Thorax with a deadpanned look. (*Cues: The Terminator - Title Theme*) Terminator then proceeds to exit the fiery building with all of his guns and wearing his trademark outfit, with his sunglasses being the last piece put on. “Yes, yes it was,” said Discord answering Thorax’s previous question. (*Cues: RoboCop 3 - Death Of Lewis*) RoboCop arrives in a police car in order to arrest the Terminator. RoboCop: Freeze, creep. You're under arrest. Come quietly or there'll be... *draws his Auto-9* ...trouble. “This is going to be good,” Flash said in a giddy voice. (*Cues: RoboCop 3 - Robo Fights Otomo*) The Terminator then takes out his Hardballer and analyzes RoboCop, classifying him as a cyborg with a high threat level, and noting his titanium and laminated kevlar, as well as two vital weak points: his human brain and "human heart". Terminator: Negative. Walk away if you want to live. RoboCop also analyzes his opponent, classifying him as a cyborg of unknown origin, then noting his weapons, his two hydrogen fuel cells and the danger posed if they're damaged, and Terminator's cool sunglasses. “Eyup,” Big Mac agreed with robocop's opinion on the Terminator’s sunglasses. RoboCop: You are coming with me. Alive... or dead. FIGHT! (*Cues: Terminator 3: Rise of the Machines - Terminator Tangle*) The Terminator fires his hardballer pistol, which has no affect on RoboCop. Robocop then fires multiple shots from his handcannon, which slightly staggers Terminator. Afterward, the two continuously fire their handguns as they walk towards each other. Terminator throws away his hardballer and pulls out his shotgun, then proceeds to shoots RoboCop multiple times at close range, knocking him back. “Hmmm it takes a shotgun to push back Robocop while it just takes Robocop’s hanconon to stagger the Terminator,” muttered Shining Armor as he kept a close eye on the match. Terminator: Out of my way! *fires at RoboCop* Terminator proceeds to hit RoboCop with the shotgun a few times and while Robocop attempts to counter by shooting with his handcannon, Terminator grabs his arm and evades the shots, then continues hitting him with his shotgun. RoboCop then twirls his handcannon and shoots the shotgun out of the Terminator's hand, but Terminator dominates him in hand to hand. RoboCop: Take that, criminal scum...*interrupted by punch* "HA!" laughed Discord. Then RoboCop manages to gets two hits in, the last one breaking his opponent's sunglasses. Angered, the Terminator punches him repeatedly, slams him into the ground, breaking the road, pummels him, then throws him through the window of his own police car. Terminator takes out his grenade launcher, throws up a round, catches it, and places it into the chamber as he prepares to send RoboCop off. Terminator: Hasta la vista... baby. “So cool!” cheered a starry eyed Spike. The Terminator fires his grenade launcher, completely obliterates the entire car, seemingly winning the whole battle right there. “YES” cheered team Terminator. “It’s not over yet,” said Flash with a grin. (*Cues: Unknown Theme*) However, RoboCop comes out of the wreckage with his flight pack and cobra assault cannon. RoboCop: Good news, scum. *aims cobra assault cannon* You are no longer under arrest. He fires it at the Terminator, who is knocked back. Terminator evades all of the other shots, retrieving his shotgun, and hides. As RoboCop flies around searching for his opponent, the Terminator is climbing a building. RoboCop stays floating in midair, unable to find his adversary. RoboCop: Hmm... do you plan on hiding forever? The Terminator is shown at the top of a rooftop, revving up his minigun. Terminator: No! “Surprise Motherfucker!” yelled Discord while wearing a black polo shirt. (*Cues: Terminator 3: Rise of the Machines - Terminator Tangle again*) He then proceeds to fire and lands several solid hits on the surprised RoboCop, who is knocked back. RoboCop manages to evade the remainder of the fire and analyzes the minigun, finding a weakness in its 6 barrel pivot. He fires six shots, each of which hit their marks, jamming the minigun, which Terminator discards. RoboCop charges at him, but Terminator aims his grenade launcher, calculating the arc angle. Terminator: Time to bring you down to earth! He manages to hit the flight pack with the grenade launcher, causing it to malfunction. With his flight pack out of control, RoboCop jumps off onto the rooftop as it flies off towards the ground without him. RoboCop attaches the weapon arm, and Terminator throws aside his grenade launcher for his shotgun and jumps down towards him. RoboCop: Your move. Terminator lands a hit, but RoboCop retaliates with his flamethrower, continuously burning him. (*Cues: Robocop 1987 - Rock Shop*) RoboCop: Property damage. Resisting arrest. Assaulting an officer. Murderer, your hot streak ends here. RoboCop stops firing the flamethrower and the Terminator, a part of his face burned, is agitated. Terminator: Fuck you, Dick-wad! RoboCop: You have the right to remain silent... RoboCop then kicks the Terminator off of the building, and aims at his falling opponent with his weapon arm. RoboCop: I suggest you exercise it. Note to self remember to use that line when capturing a criminal,” muttered Shining armor getting a nod from Flash Sentry. He fire his smart bomb missile, which hits the Terminator, forcing him into an oil tank, which creates a massive explosion. RoboCop jumps down from the building, "do a flip!" cheered Discord. (*Cues: Death by Fire/Terminator Gets Up - The Terminator 1984*) but the Terminator makes it out, with his human skin and clothes destroyed, but the machine underneath unscathed and still holding his shotgun in his left hand. He then opens a hidden compartment in his chest, and reaches inside it with his right hand, pulling out a plasma rifle. He then fires at RoboCop, two of the shots which hit, stunning his weapon arm and right leg. RoboCop is then forced to limp away into cover behind a car in order to evade the plasma rifle blasts. Once he gets behind the car, he lifts it up with one hand and throws it towards the Terminator, trapping his right arm. The Terminator is forced to tear itself away from its right arm and then marches towards RoboCop with his shotgun. “He’s willing to give up a arm to continue,” muttered a terrified Flash Sentry. (*Cues: Terminator 2 main theme*) Terminator fires shot after shot, damaging part of RoboCop's visor display and draining his battery level from 6% to 5%. RoboCop scans for a weakness, finding one in the Terminator's waist hinge. Eventually, RoboCop is forced into a corner as Terminator points his shotgun at his opponent's head. But just as the Terminator pulls the trigger... the weapon's out of ammo. “Huh?” asked a dumbfounded team Terminator. RoboCop: Nine shots. You're out. (*Cues: Unknown Theme*) Discord grinned and said. “you done goofed,” Without another hand for the Terminator to reload his shotgun, RoboCop then attaches a level 10 ordinance grenade to the Terminator, grounds himself with his rambolts, and then takes out his handcannon. RoboCop: Checkmate. He then shoots the grenade with his pistol, causing a huge explosion. RoboCop is damaged, but is alright, and thinks the fight is over. “I doubt it.” said Sunburst. (*Cues: Death by Fire/Terminator Gets Up - The Terminator 1984*) RoboCop is surprised to see that Terminator is still functional, crawling with one arm and with its head turned the other way. He proceeds to lift up the Terminator by his neck. RoboCop: What are you doing? This fight is over. The Terminator then turns his head in the right direction towards RoboCop. “Whoa!” yelled out a startled Spike. “ that creepy.” Terminator: Not... yet. RoboCop, at 1% charge, realizes that the fuel cells have been ruptured. RoboCop: Hydrogen fuel cells... ruptured! “SHIT!” yelled out everyone. If one fuel cell had such destructive they shuddered at the thought of TWO exploding at the same time. The Terminator, intent on taking his opponent with him, tries reaching out to grab RoboCop. Terminator: You... are... terminated. “I gotta give the wind up toy credit, it never gives up,” complemented Discord. (*Cues: The Terminator - Terminator 3: Rise of the Machines*) With quick thinking, RoboCop straps Terminator to the flight-pack, which crash-landed on a car nearby, and sends him into the air. Terminator: I'll... be... BACK! Shortly after he says this, the hydrogen fuel cells explode, creating a huge explosion as the screen goes white. The head surprisingly comes down with the red eyes still glowing. RoboCop proceeds to twirl his pistol and places it back into his leg. K.O.! RoboCop then walks forward and stomps on the Terminator's head, shattering it, then continues walking. Results (*Cues: Unknown Theme*) Boomstick: I don't think he'll be back from that one. “I’ll say,” muttered out a bummed out Thorax. Wiz: Terminator may have held the speed advantage, but RoboCop trumped everything else. His arsenal certainly had more destructive force behind it. Boomstick: You'd think the Terminator's space rifle would be enough, but RoboCop has tanked plasma shots before. Wiz: In fact, the difference in survivability is very clear cut. RoboCop fell from the top of a skyscraper on to a gas tank which then exploded... and he was fine. “While no superman levels of durability it’s still really impressive,” said Shining Armor. Boomstick: The Terminator was blown up by a homemade pipe bomb. “In the words of Rainbow Dash, lame~,” mocked Spike. Wiz: RoboCop pushed a building-busting bomb into a warehouse (that's solid brick by the way), which detonated in his face... and he was fine. “The guys like a walking fortress,” said Flash in awe. Boomstick: The Terminator was obliterated by the same kind of explosion. Wiz: RoboCop stopped and REVERSED a 3000 psi hydraulic press with his bare hands... Boomstick: Y-you guys see where this is going now, right? “Yay we get it Boomstick,” snarked Sunburst with an eye roll. Wiz: And being part-human means that Murphy can think more creatively, adding a level of unpredictability the Terminator could not immediately understand. Boomstick: The Terminator almost had a victory, until it blew up in his face. “Boo! Get of the stage!” yelled Discord. Wiz: The winner is RoboCop. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Boomstick: Next time on Death Battle. The group sees a figure that they could barely see but they could see that he has a mustache and a cap with an L on it. Then they saw another figure that looked like a fox… with two tails. “Well this will be interesting,” said a confused Spike. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ “Well that was all well and good but usually we would get something from a magic box after an episode but that’s back in the castle,” said Spike with a disappointed tone. But before anyone could say anything a bright light filled the room blinding everyone. “What in Harmony’s name was that?” asked Sunburst while rubbing his eye’s. Once everyone one’s vision came back to them the first thing they noticed was they were all at sugar cube center sitting around a table and the second thing they noticed was that each one of them had a wrapped gift sat in front of them on the table. “Well this is new,” muttered Spike as he notice a note placed on top of his gift. Picking it up Spike began to read, “Hope you enjoyed your guys night out. Here’s some presents and have a Merry Christmas.” “What’s this Christmas thing?” Shining and Flash asked while Sunburst and Thorax looked confused. “A human world holiday like our Hearth’s Warming Eve,” Spike said as he picked his gift and started to unwrap it. Once all the paper was taken off, Spike opened the box to find a load of comics inside. “Sweet, what did you guys get?” Big Mac held up a familiar black leather jacket while wearing black sunglasses. Shining Armor had a gun similar to Robocop and started to inspect it. Sunburst was looking through a book that had different charts and graphs inside it. If any of them looked closely, they would see that the book showed different designs and some pictures of certain robots and machines. Flash was trying on a helmet that looked like a pony version of Robocop’s helmet. Once on, Flash said, “I’m never taking this off.” Thorax held up a terminator action figure and said, “cool.” “Okay. I guess we should go back home,” Spike said, jumping off his chair. “I guess we should. It’s gonna be a long ride back,” Shining said as Flash, Sunburst and Thorax walked towards the door. Once outside, the prince of the crystal kingdom turned back to the Ponyville residents and said, “We should do this again sometime.” “Yeah but on our own terms. Anyways I need to get back so bye everyone,” Spike said, running towards the castle while muttering. “I got to take care of a few things.” Everyone else said their goodbyes as Big Mac walked towards his farm in silence. He just about home when he heard a scream coming from the Everfree Forest. Without even thinking, Big Mac ran into the forest to find out where the screaming came from. A moment later and Big Mac found Cheerilee in a clearing as a Timberwolf was looming over her. The timberwolf was getting closer to Cheerilee as she just laid there, waiting for somepony to save her. The wooden animal opened its maw, ready to bite her, when it looked up and was hit with a cart. Looking at the rekt cart, she saw Big Mac slowly dismount from it and make his way towards her. Once he was in front of her, he held out his hoof to the school teacher. Cheerilee was confused as she asked, “Does this mean come with you if I want to live?” “Eeyup,” Big Mac simply said. While Cheerilee got back to her hoofs, the sound of wood snapping drew their attention back to the cart. The timberwolf was slowly reconstructing itself as it clawed it’s out of the wreckage. “Nope,” said big Mac as he picked up one of the wheels from the cart and chucked with all of his strength at the twisted monster and when it hit both it and the Timberwolf were sent flying into the distance. Cheerilee walked up to Big Mac and said, “My hero,” while hugging him. Big Mac just smirked while adjusting his glasses at the job well done. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Chapter end! Next ti-*record scratch* “wait! Wait! Wait! Hold on before we end the chapter here’s a trailer for you guys!” Trailer start in 3… 2… 1! (a DEADMAN PRODUCTION!) YOU LOVED THE MAIN SIX WATCHES DEATH BATTLE. Random commentor: What. The. Fuck. Is. This. Shit? NOW WE BRING YOU THE NEXT BIG THING! Trepp: ….WHAT DO YOU MEAN WE DON’T HAVE ANYTHING PLANNED OUT!?, YOU STUPID MOTHER- A THRILLING TALE OF BEST FRIENDS! Rainbow Dash: Heh, we finally found a perfect match for you. Miracles do happen. Sunset: FUCK YOU RAINBOW DASH! WHERE OUR HEROES WILL LEARN IMPORTANT LIFE LESSONS. ????:Invest in real estate. There's no such thing as a preferment record. Always eat breakfast. All the girls on the internet are actually dudes. And you should never, ever buy the extended warranty on anything...EVER. Oh, also, chicks like it when you tell them their pretty, but they also like it when you're kind of a dick to em. So, mix it up a little! Pinkie Pie: I’m learning! STARRING: SUNSET SHIMMER. Sunset: GOD FUCKING DAMNIT. *fires a rifle wildly onto some assholes* AND THESE ASSHOLES! Human 6: HEY ENJOY AS THEY WATCH A SHOW THAT ASK THE REAL QUESTIONS! Pan up from the ground and close in on two soldiers on top of a base, one clad in maroon armor, the other in orange. Maroon armor: Hey. Orange: Yeah? Maroon Armor: You ever wonder why we’re here? SUNSET AND FRIENDS WATCHES RED VS BLUE! COMING SOON… ISH. (trailer end) ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Chapter end! Next time luigi vs tails.
Luigi VS Tails.The next day Twilight was waiting for her friends in front of her castle for the next episode of death battle, Hopefully Spike would be able to get them. As the minutes passed Twilight noticed a blue speck in the sky starting to slowly get closer, smiling Twilight open the front door letting her friends rainbow dash in. As Rainbow Dash flew in, Twilight noticed she was wearing the large cap that covered up most of her mane. “What's with the cap?” “I had an… annoying run-in with Discord today,” Rainbow Dash said. “Anyways, ready for today’s episode?” asked Twilight. “Aww yeah, it’s gonna be so awesome. I can’t wait for the others to get here,” Rainbow said, punching the air in front of her as a knocking sound was heard. Rainbow flew to the front door while saying, “Hey girls, what’s….up?” What Rainbow saw wasn’t her friends standing there excitingly chatting away. What was there was a small orange pegasus filly with a purple mane as she looked up at the older mare. “Squirt? What're you doing here?” Rainbow asked, landing on the ground. She began to think if she promised Scootaloo anything recently but came up with nothing. “Hey, Rainbow Dash. Can we hang out?” Scootaloo asked, flapping her little wings in excitement. “Well, i was kinda gonna do something with Twilight and the others,” Rainbow began to say as Scootaloo looked at the ground. “Oh,” the orange filly said, feeling a bit depressed. Seeing her little friend and little sister figure in such a sad state had Rainbow Dash quickly think of a way to fix this. “ Though i’m sure Twilight wouldn't mind if you joined us.” The little filly looked up at her idol and asked, “Really?” “I'm sure it'll be fine,” Rainbow said while waving a hoof dismissively. “Now c’mon inside squirt. It's gonna start as soon as everypony gets here.” Scootaloo didn't know what was gonna start but followed Rainbow into the viewing room where Twilight was. Once inside, the filly marveled at the sheer size of the TV as Rainbow landed by Twilight. “Yo Twi, is it ok if Scoots joins us for this Episode?” the blue mare asked her purple friend. Said mare thought about it for a moment before she just shrugged her shoulders. “I don’t see why not,” Twilight said with a smile much to the young filly’s joy. “Scootaloo i think i should warn you that what we're about to watch might get a bit violent,” Twilight said, hoping the filly would understand the implications of her warning. “Don’t worry Twilight i’m a big girl,” said the little pegasus with pride much to the amusement of the two adult mares. “You sure are squirt,” said Rainbow dash as she ruffled the orange filly’s mane causing her to let out few giggles. It didn’t take them long for the others to arrive and see Scootaloo there, eating a few marshmallows. After Twilight explained why the filly was there, she grabbed the remote and pressed play. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Interlude (*Cues: Invader - Jim Johnston*) Wiz: With the dragon slain and the princess rescued, the hero revels in gold, glory and cake. “And a "thank you for saving me" kisses!” Spike added, giving Rarity a wink. “Down boy.” Rarity giggled while the rest of the group chuckled. Boomstick: But they couldn't have done it without a little help. Wiz: The sidekick. The people's champion would be lost without his player 2. “Sidekicks huh?” Scootaloo mused before smiling at her big sister. “So Dash…” “Maybe when you're older.” “Aw~” Wiz: Such as Luigi, Mario's younger brother... “Wait, younger brother?” Starlight said with interest, unaware that the heroic plumber had any siblings. Boomstick: And Tails the Fox, Sonic's deformed flying stalker. “So one of Sonic’s friends is in this fight huh? That explains why Discord did this to my mane.” Rainbow stated before taking off her cap, revealing that her mane had been styled to look just like Sonic’s quills. She smirked before glancing at her friends who were all trying not to snicker. “Just so you all know, I still have my book.” Wiz: Now we have already proven that standard Mario and Sonic series power-ups perfectly counter each other, so, to not waste time, we're giving these second strings only what unique to them. “Make sense,” said Twilight with a shrug. Boomstick: He's Wiz and I'm Boomstick. Wiz: And it's our job to analyze their weapons, armor and skills to find out who would win a Death Battle. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Luigi (*Cues: Super Mario All-Stars - Game Select Theme*) Wiz: After clobbering Koopas, besting Bowser, and saving the princess, who gets all the credit? Boomstick: Mario, of course. “Wait, what?” Spike asked. Boomstick: Leaving his lanky brother with rejected sloppy seconds. “That hardly seems fair.” Fluttershy mumbled, feeling sorry for the younger sibling. “I’ll say,” muttered Applejack. (*Cues: New Super Luigi U - Main Theme*) Wiz: No doubt, Luigi has it rough. Despite being born as one of the seven star children destined for greatness, it's not easy being second fiddle to the most popular character in video game history, yet he doesn't seem to mind. Like a good sidekick, Luigi exists only to help Mario, never asking for his own slice of the cake. Boomstick: So he's pretty much a slave. "I wouldn't say slave, he's more like… a really effective partner." Twilight elaborated, giving Spike an affectionate pat on the head. “I’m sure he gets his reward in some way,” said Rarity. Wiz: In a way, but this devotion makes him the perfect teammate, helping to save the Mushroom Kingdom time and time again. Boomstick: What did Mario do to him to make him so obedient? He's gotta have some serious dirt from their childhood. Background Age: 26 Height: 5'5" Weight: 200 lbs. Mario's Younger Brother Citizen of Mushroom Kingdom Trained by the Jellyfish Sisters & the Thunder God Wiz: Luigi may take subordination to an extreme, but he's no pushover. In fact, he's not only taller than Mario, but also faster and more athletic. “That does make sense, considering he's thinner and taller than his brother.” said Rainbow Dash. Wiz: He can jump over 6 feet higher, plus after studying Yoshi's superb jumping ability, Luigi developed his own variant of the dinosaur's floating technique, the Scuttle Jump. “Impressive.” Applejack mused while Fluttershy giggled at how silly the Scuttle Jump looked “Heheh! Reminds me of how i float when i flap my wings,” laughed Scootaloo while flapping her small wings to do just that. Skills & Abilities Superhuman Strength & Stamina Scuttle Jump Super Jump Green Missile Luigi Cyclone Super Jump Punch Superior Jumping Ability Boomstick: His abilities don't end with the mid-air hustle, Luigi has plenty of powerful attacks, each of which, if pulled off perfectly, increase their damage for quick KO's. The spinning Luigi Cyclone, the rocketing Green Missile, The screen changed to showcase several of his moves, Rainbow and Scootaloo applauded the Luigi Cyclone, hoping to learn a move like that. “Now that's what I call using your head!” Pinkie joked upon seeing the Green Missile, earning the collective groan from the rest of the audience. “Leave the bad puns to Boomstick dear.” Rarity sighed. Boomstick: And the Super Jump Punch, which can send his foe up into the air so high, they never come back down. Luigi sneaks up on Jigglypuff from behind and uses the Super Jump Punch, knocking Jigglypuff into the background. Jigglypuff: JIGGLYPUFF!!!!! Spike, Scootaloo, Pinkie, and Rainbow burst out laughing at the sight. “Poor Jigglypuff…” mumbled Fluttershy feeling bad for the pink ball pokemon. (*Cues: Athletic Theme - New Super Mario Bros. Wii*) Wiz: In addition, He has numerous power-ups at his disposal, including his trusty hammer and the Vanish Power Flower, which makes him invisible and intangible. Wiz: Luigi could be next to you… Everyone shivered as the atmosphere grew cold. Wiz: Watching you… While everyone else were looking around Rainbow Dash quietly sneaked behind the nearest pony who unfortunately was Rarity. Wiz: Right now... “WEEGEE!!” Rainbow shouted from behind Rarity. “EEEEEK!!!” The fashionista screamed in terror Boomstick: Aahhh, stop that! He was trained by the Thunder God himself in the powerful Thunder Hand technique. With this he can shoot lightning at his foes or at deadly soccer balls. “Sweet!” cheered Rainbow Dash and Scootaloo. Wiz: And after spending so much time in Mario's shadow, Luigi has somehow gained the ability to manipulate some sort of negative energy. Luigi dances, creating the Negative Zone. “... trippy,” muttered Starlight as she stared at the negative zone. “...and disturbing...” Scootaloo added, getting some bad vibes from seeing the display. (*Cues: Battlerock Galaxy - Super Mario Galaxy*) Boomstick: Remember when Mario Bros. was about running around and jumping on turtles? Anyway, you were saying something about physics breaking time energy or whatever? Wiz: Luigi's Negative Zone can devastate a nearby opponent. Its effects are random, but unavoidable, ranging from sudden dizziness to uncontrollable tripping over absolutely nothing. “Wow i don’t think even my Pinkie sense would predict that!” gasped out Pinkie Pie. Boomstick: But when Luigi wants real firepower, he busts out the Poltergust 5000, a handy vacuum cleaner which can somehow kill ghosts. It can KILL that which is already DEAD. “Wait, WHAT?!” Twilight gasped. “How is that even possible?!” “It’s a videogame don’t question it,” shrugged Spike before flinching away from Twilight as her mane was starting to burst into flames. “AS PRINCESS I WILL QUESTION AS MUCH AS I PLEASE!” she yelled in the royal canterlot voice. Wiz: He ain't afraid of no ghosts. Power-Ups Hammer Thunderhand Vanish Power Flower Poltergust 3000 (Elemental Medals: Fire, Water, Ice) Negative Zone A ghost appears behind Luigi, frightening him. (*Cues: Professor E. Gadd - Luigi's Mansion: Dark Moon*) Wiz: Scratch that, he's afraid of all ghosts, bugs, water, flowers, the sun. “This guy is making me look like the bravest pony in the world” Fluttershy mumbled. Wiz: Luigi is a coward and doesn't even try to hide it. Granted, his fears are usually justified,... usually. Boomstick: He's also pretty clumsy, and you'd think would make a terrible combination. But like the Chinese Drunken Master style, Luigi harnesses awkwardness to make himself even more vicious. He's more powerful than he seems, murdering Goombas and Koopas by the hundreds every day. Luigi uses a cannon on the Koopas in "Koopa's Kartoon Show". Weaknesses Cowardly Clumsy Sleeps through important events Inferiority complex Fails at traction (*Cues: Mr. L/Green Thunder - Super Paper Mario*) Boomstick: Ha Ha. Before we go any further, I'd like to point out that the unmaking cannon belongs to a bunch of children. "IS IT BEDTIME NOW MOM?!" Goush! No more parents! Scootaloo smirked deviously as she glanced at the gift box behind them, she slowly took a few steps backwards… “Scoots, no.” Rainbow said without turning around. The orange Pegasus sighed and sat back down next to her. Wiz: Even without it, Luigi has defeated Dimentio, discovered the Grand Final Galaxy, raised a ravenous man-eating dinosaur, and even rescued Mario from certain doom on three separate occasions. Feats & Strengths Expert in multiple sports Defeated Dimentio Saved Wario from Chief Chilly Defeated King Boo Assisted Mario in many adventures Regularly smashes solid bricks Won Mario Party by doing absolutely nothing “It’s not uncommon for the sidekick to save the hero.” Spike smiled. “I’ve even read a few comics where Humdrum saved the Power Ponies.” Scootaloo smiled at this. “Oh, you read those too?” Wiz: The Green Thunder can pretty much do it all. Boomstick: Luigi is one mean, green, fighting machine. Luigi: *Puts on Poltergust* Yeah. *Speaking into the nozzle* I do it. Ho-ho! Luigi dances, then accidentally bumps into a car, which then causes a shelf to fall down. Luigi: Oh... This caused the girls to laugh and Spike chuckled at the clumsy green plumber. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ The group was impressed with Luigi's skill and willingness to face his fear to save the day. “I’m rooting for him,” declared Spike getting some agreements from Applejack, Fluttershy, and even Rarity. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Tails (*Cues: Seaside Hill: Act 2 - Sonic Generations*) Tails: All systems go... full speed ahead! “AWWWWW~!” cried Twilight and her five friends while Spike and Scootaloo covered their ears in pain. Wiz: Born the very same day Dr. Eggman began his robot powered takeover of the world, Miles Prower- Boomstick: Haha! I get it! Miles-Per-Hour! Creativity like that is why Sega is still making consoles… “Oh shut up.” Scootaloo scoffed bitterly. Background Full Name: Miles "Tails" Prower Age: 11 Height: 2'7" Weight: 44lbs. IQ: 300 The youngest Freedom Fighter The Chosen One of the Ancient Walkers Wiz: Ahem, Miles was awkwardly born with two tails. Mere minutes after being welcomed into the world, Eggman's deadly forces made Miles Prower an orphan. “... damn.” muttered Applejack. “Oh my… that poor little fox...” whimpered Fluttershy, feeling sympathy for the fox losing his parents. Boomstick: Whoa, that's... that's pretty fucked up. “I’ll say…” said Rainbow Dash while taking a glance towards Applejack and Scootaloo. “What is it with every hero in fiction always losing their parents?” Spike asked angrily. “Is there just some unspoken law that no hero can have a happy family?!” Wiz: Eight years later, and after some much needed counseling, Miles stumbled upon a broken-down biplane and happily repaired the whole vehicle on his own. “At the age of 8?” asked an impressed Twilight. Boomstick: Well, of course. Just like all walking, talking, adolescent, two-tailed foxes can. Anyway, as it turns out, that plane happened to belong to Miles' personal idol, Sonic the Hedgehog. Sonic: What're you doing? (*Cues: Emerald Hill Zone - Sonic The Hedgehog 2*) Boomstick: Why Sonic needed a plane in the first place is beyond me, but whatever. “Well Eggman’s got those flying battleships…. and he can’t exactly swim...” Rainbow stated. Wiz: It was Sonic who first suggested that Miles' birth defects could be used to fly by spinning them like helicopter blades. Which is obviously impossible because it could never create lift and-- *Shocked to see that Miles is flying* WHAT?! “That’s so cool!” cheered Scootaloo her wings buzzing in excitement. “B-b-but how?!” Twilight shoulted in confusion. ”His anatomy shouldn’t allow that! And how could he-” “Twilight, this is a world where hedgehogs run at super-speed and fight an evil egg-scientist, are you REALLY trying to apply logic here?” Rainbow asked. “But-” Spike interrupted her. “Don’t try to wrap your brain around it Twi, it’ll be the “Pinkie-Sense” all over again.” (*Cues: Believe In Myself (Instrumental) - Sonic Adventure 2*) Boomstick: And so, Sonic gave his rotary ass the oh so obvious nickname he deserved, "TAILS". “That's a catchy nickname.” Starlight smiled. “I think it's cute.” Fluttershy giggled. “Ya… cute,” mumbled Scootaloo. Wiz: Well that's stupid. That's like if you were nicknamed "Boomstick" because you just like shotguns. Boomstick: Don't be fucking ridiculous, Wizard. Everyone chuckled at this. Boomstick: Anyway, besides flight, Tails' copter butt blades are strong enough to bust metal, and he can use them like a turbine of an engine to keep up with Sonic's super fast speeds. He can almost reach the speed of sound. Rainbow gave a whistle, impressed with the young foxe’s skill. “The kid is impressive!” said the blue mare before reaching over and ruffling Scootaloo’s main. “ just like you squirt.” Scootaloo giggled at the affection and turn her gaze back onto Tail with eyes filled with admiration. Twin Tails Flight Increases running speed Strong enough to break metal Combat techniques (Tail Swipe Attack, Rapid Tails Attack, & Thunder Shoot Punt) Wiz: Tails pledged himself to Sonic's freedom fighting cause against Dr. Eggman, and the two became friends, almost like brothers. “Aww, that’s sweet.” Fluttershy smiled as Rainbow gave her own “little sis” a playful noogie. Wiz: They also share a sort of teacher-student relationship, though it wasn't always clear who was the student. Boomstick: It was Tails who invented the famous Spin Dash. Not the speedy hedgehog. (*Cues: Mad Gear Zone Act 2 - Sonic The Hedgehog 4 Episode 1*) Wiz: Tails is a genius and a master mechanic. Boomstick: He's so much smarter than Sonic, that he actually learned how to swim. “How hard it is for Sonic to learn how the swim?” Scootaloo asked curiously, if his sidekick could do it, why not the hero? “I think it has something to do with aquaphobia...” Rainbow said. Wiz: He has built several planes and combat mechs and has numerous gadgets on hand. Like the Projectile Ring, which can pull or latch onto objects, almost like a grappling hook. Boomstick: But despite being a super geek, he really likes to blow shit up. He carries a huge supply of bombs. Big bombs, napalm bombs, remote bombs, flash-bang grenades, bombs shaped like magic rings, bombs shaped like mice, bombs shaped like your mother. You name it, he's got a bomb like it. “Oooo! You think he has a party bomb?” Pinkie asked in excitement. Twilight gave her pink friend a flat stare before pulling out a rolled up newspaper and gently wacked Pinki’s mane. “Hey!” “Bad Pinkie, no bombs in any parties,” the princess of friendship said with a flat tone. Wiz: He also wields the Magic Hand, a long-range comical punching weapon, and the Energy Ball arm cannon. “Man i hope we get to see a fighter whose main weapon is a arm cannon,” said an excited spike. Boomstick: Which is ripped straight out of Mega Man! He built all this HIMSELF, but never a device to breath underwater. Kinda dropped the ball there, sidekick. “Meh, even a genius has an off day,” shrugged Starlight. Offensive Arsenal Spin Dash Projectile Ring Bombs (Napalm, Chu^2, Dummy Rings, Flash Bangs) Magic Hand Energy Ball arm cannon (*Cues: Sonic The Hedgehog - Drowning Theme*) Tails swims underwater as the timer goes down to zero, causing him to drown. Applejack face-hoofed. “Seriously?! He couldn't have built some scuba gear or something?!” Rarity shuddered. “That’s just disturbing...” “Yeah, drowning is one of the worst ways to die.” Spike agreed. Wiz: Unlike Sonic's speed-blitzing battling style, Tails relies on logic and tactics in a fight. His Shield Bot fortifies his defenses and his Medibot heals wounds over time. ‘Putting thouse on the list of things to make… after i find out who broke my Rainbow-Bot!’ thought an angry Twilight who was still wondering why somepony would break her invention and steal the designs for them. ‘Not to self make sure to burn the blueprints for the pony bots,’ thought Spike. Support Arsenal Medi Bot Shield Bot Jet Anklets (Boosts flight speed) Rhythm Badge (Helps maintain balance) T-Pup remote robot Boomstick: But he's a total wimp. He can't fly forever, and if he doesn't have Sonic around to hold his hand, he's scared of pretty much everything. After a good thunderclap you'll find him shivering his spiny ass off in the bathtub. Sonic: Right, we should hurry. Thunder goes off in the background, scaring Tails, who jumps and grabs onto Sonic. Tails/Fluttershy/Scootaloo: GAAHH!! I'm afraid of lightning!! Everyone couldn't help but chuckle at the adorable sight of Tails clinging to Sonic…. and laughed a little upon seeing Scootaloo latched onto Rainbow’s leg and Fluttershy cowering under her left wing. Weaknesses Fear of thunder (also known as Astraphobia) Fear of ghosts (also known as Phasmophobia) Gets dizzy easily Over-reliability on Sonic Youthful naiveté Lacks hand-to-hand combat (*Cues: Event: All Heroes Gather - Sonic Heroes*) Wiz: Well, he is only 11 years old, and the feats he's accomplished at his age are beyond impressive. Like being able to run 100 mph without his tails, stopping a nuclear missile, and saving the MULTIVERSE by transforming into... Uh... (the group now sees a really buff Tails.) (*music fades*) Scootaloo’s eye twitched. “I…. I don’t even...” “What am I even looking at?!” Pinkie shouted. Boomstick: Don't do steroids kids. “Agreed.” said Rarity not realising she was agreeing with Boomstick. Feats & Strengths Top speed: 1223 km/h / 700 mph Can run 100 mph without his tails Self-taught genius technician Defeated Wendy Witchcart Saved Station Square from a nuke Defeated the Battle Bird Armada Defeated Dr. Ivo "Eggman" Robotnik on the ARK Unified the Chaos Emeralds to complete the Great Harmony The scene changed to Tails fixing his plane while Sonic watched. Sonic: We good to go or what, Tails? Tails: I've built a TV out of paperclips... Starlight blinked. “Wait, what?” Sonic: Yeah... Tails: ...and reprogrammed a supercomputer using dishwashing detergent and a toothpick... Sonic: I know... “I'm no genius but I'm pretty sure that's impossible.” Rainbow stated. Tails: ...So look, fixing a propeller on a bi-plane? That's about as difficult as taking a nap. [spins propeller] As Tails spins the propeller, the plane starts its engine after it was fixed. “I have SEVERAL questions….” Twilight deadpanned. Sonic: 'Kay, I did not need your whole life story. A simple "good to go" would have been cool. Tails: Alright. Good to go! Sonic: Cool! “Heh heh, I like this guy! He's got smarts and snark!” Scootaloo chuckled. “Aww~ somepony’s got a crush!” Pinkie giggled, much to the foal’s embarrassment. “Just like her big sis!” Applejack added. Rainbow simply rolled her eyes and pulled out her book. “Shutting up now.” Applejack said with a strained smile. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ The group was REALLY impressed with Tails’s accomplishments and feats at such a young age. “I’m rooting for Tails!” declared Scootaloo with red cheeks. much the the amusement of the rest of the group ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Wiz: Alright. The combatants are set. Let's end this debate once and for all. Boomstick: It's time for a time for a Death Battle! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Death Battle (*Cues: Sonic The Movie - Land of Darkness*) Tails flies down onto a pipe and starts scouting the area, but Luigi pops out of the pipe, making Tails jump down. The plumber jumps out of the pipe angrily to face Tails. “I guess he still sore for what Sonic did to Mario,” winced Starlight. Luigi: Let's-a go! FIGHT! (*Cues: Chemical Bath - fan remix of Chemical Plant Zone - Sonic 2*) Tails uses his energy cannon, but Luigi powers through with a Green Missile, but his attack misses as Tails jumps away and hits Luigi down to the ground with his tails. Luigi jumps back up as Tails uses the spin dash to charge at his opponent, but Luigi counters with the hammer, hitting Miles up into the air. Luigi follows him upwards with his Scuttle Jump and they go blow-for-blow, with it being Tails Swipes VS Luigi Cyclones. The two eventually knock each other away, Tails into the air and Luigi onto the ground. Luigi walks around as Tails closes in on him and the plumber tries to jump up and hit Tails with his Hammer again, but Tails counters it with his tails again, knocking Luigi back. “GO TAILS!!!” cheered Scootaloo, jumping up and down in excitement. “Whoo! That boy gots some moves!” said Rainbow Dash impressed. Tails lands on the ground and tries out another spin dash, but this time Luigi launches Tails up with his Super Jump Punch. Tails manages to recover though and begins flying around the place from his high altitude. He then goes back down to the ground, picks up Luigi and begins to fly back up, but Luigi uses his vanish flower to confuse Tails, and knocks the fox away with his hammer to break free. “Oh i know i said i’d root for Luigi but i don’t want to see the cute fox get hurt either.” whimpered out Fluttershy. The Hammer and Tails' gadgets go blow-for-blow first with the Magic Hand and Hammer colliding, Tails taking out his arm cannon again but Luigi simply hits him, Tails using the Magic Hand from the ground now but doing nothing to his intangible adversary and finally as Tails charges up his arm cannon once more, Luigi nails him in the face and sends him downwards a bit. “Gasp!” gasped out Scootaloo seeing Tails getting nailed in the face. “Don’t worry he can still pull through,” comforted Twilight while Rainbow Dash patted the young filly’s back. As Tails recovers from the blow and starts flying again Luigi uses the Scuttle Jump again to land safely as the invisibility wears off. But soon after Luigi lands, (*Cues: Super Mario Galaxy 2 - Bowser Jr's Boomsday Machine*) Tails drops multiple bombs surrounding the plumber and leaving him to run around in panic. Luigi then gets the idea to suck up the bombs with his Poltergust 5000, and fires all the bombs at Tails. However, they are launched just barely too low to hit Tails, and it backfires on him as they land before he can run and blow him sky high. “Pfft Hahahahaha!” everyone laughed at the poor plumber’s misfortune. After being launched up, Luigi notices a pipe and dives into it, then shooting out with his Lightning powers fully activated, completely surrounded in lightning. He hits Tails with his Super Jump Punch, followed by a Green Missile and then slams into him multiple times with Luigi Cyclones before hitting him with his Hammer, and transferring all of the electricity into his hands, sending Tails away with an extremely powerful Thunder Hand. “Nooo!!!” cried Scootaloo as Rainbow Dash held her close. In the distance, Tails gets back on his feet and uses his Medi Bot to heal, but Luigi somehow clears all that distance and uses his Poltergust to bring it close to him and the Hammer to destroy it. Luigi then tries to suck Tails in and finish the fight, and almost succeeds until Tails throws his projectile ring at a nearby pipe to keep himself steady, and throws out a Flash Bang which Luigi's Poltergust sucks up and escapes into a pipe. “Too bright!” cried Rarity as she tried to get her eyesight back. (*Cues: Opening Cutscene - Sonic Lost World*) The Flash Bang blows up, and while Luigi is dizzy, Tails comes out of the pipe and rigs a bomb onto the Poltergust and tries stalling him with his Shield Bot, but Luigi quickly destroys the bot with his hammer again. Tails jumps away from his broken machinery as Luigi pulls out and breaks a Smash Ball. Tails begins to walk towards Luigi but the plumber unleashes Negative Zone. “Oh no the acid trip is back!” cried Pinkie pie. (*Cues: The Negative Zone - SSBB*) Tails trips up and is almost hit with Luigi's hammer but he flies up to just barely escape it. He is almost sucked up by the Poltergust and finished, but Luigi is forced to stop when he notices the bomb and tries to throw it away. Unfortunately, while Tails fails to escape the blast due to the Negative Zone slowing down gravity, Luigi does not escape either and is sent hurling through the air until he slides up to the front of a pipe as the Negative Zone gets destroyed. “Sigh… welp Luigi’s a goner,” sighed Spike in defeat. (*Cues: Sonic Lost World - The Deadly Six Theme*) Tails quickly runs up to Luigi (with his tails on fire for a brief moment, presumably due to the explosion) and has him backed up against the pipe. With the two being face-to-face, Luigi readies his Hammer to squash Tails and end the fight, but isn't fast enough as the Magic Hand quickly rockets forwards, impaling Luigi through the abdomen and damaging the Warp Pipe. “Damn,” all the older mares said at seeing that finisher. K.O.! Tails goes off to heal himself with another Medi Bot as Luigi's dead corpse is left on the pipe with blood still coming out from where the Magic Hand impaled him. “... well i’m mentally scarred for life,” said Scootaloo. Results (*Cues: Sonic the Movie - Metal Sonic Fight*) Boomstick: Well, there goes the Year of Luigi. Wiz: While Luigi technically has more combat experience, and has survived being Nintendo's whipping boy, Tails' skills and arsenal was more than the green capped plumber can handle. Boomstick: His training with Sonic makes him faster and his superior mobility gave him complete control over the battlefield. Wiz: Also, he has an outrageous I.Q. of 300. “300?!” Twilight and Starlight exclaimed in shock. Wiz: Which is about as much as Albert Einstein and Stephen Hawking combined. Boomstick: Hell, Tails is stronger too. He can move 10 tons, while Luigi struggles to lift a large radish. Wiz: And Tails' gadgets more than make up for any of his weaknesses. Boomstick: Looks like Luigi was outfoxed. Scootaloo scoffed. “That pun was terrible.” Wiz: The winner is Miles "Tails" Prower. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Boomstick: Next time on Death Battle. Three red and white orbs roll on screen… then the one in the middle opens up in a bright flash turns the screen white. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ “That was so awesome,” Scootaloo yelled while everyone walk towards the box. Seeing the box glow, confused Scootaloo as she asked, “Did that box just glow?” “It sure did, squirt. After we watch an episode, we get some stuff from the box,” Rainbow said waving the smaller filly over. Scootaloo ran to the box with an excited look on her face as Pinkie opened the lids and looked inside. Pinkie pulled out a few cardboard cylinders as Twilight levitated them to herself. Opening them showed Twilight that the cylinders were holding a few blueprints inside. “Anything good?” Starlight and Spike asked at the same time. “Well let’s see~! We have some comics,” que everyone getting a few sonic comics. “Also some cute fox outfits for Rarity and Fluttershy,” the two mares happily took their gifts. “A Sonic plushie for Rainbow~.” giggled out Pinkie Pie as she handed out the gift to a blushing Rainbow Dash. “A Poltergust 5000 replica for Applejack!” cheered Pinkie Pie as she handed the farm mare the super vacuum. “This could help gather apples,” said a happy Applejack. “A new fake mustache for me and a Purple Mario hat with a green S for Spike,” Said Pinkie Pie as she and Spike traid on their new gifts. “Is there anything for me?” asked Scootaloo, hoping she also got a gift just for like the others. “Let’s see!” cheered the Pink pony as she stuck her head into the box for a few seconds before pulling her head out with a nervous look. “Umm sorry Scootaloo but it seems there's nothing left…” This shocked the group silent, not willing to believe the Box wouldn't give the little filly a gift. “There has to be some kind of mistake…” muttered Twilight trying to come up with a reason for this phenomenon. “Oh there is no mistake the box didn’t give anything to her for a reason,” stated a new voice. Shocked the group turned around to find Deadman floating near the back of the room as if he was there the whole time and a few members of the group felt that might of been the case. “Deadman…” growled out Starlight. “What are you doing here,” asked Twilight but before she could get an answer Rainbow Dash flew up to the chaos god and glared into his eye’s. “HEY what's the big idea not getting scoots anything!?” yelled Rainbow Dash, wanting a good reason why she shouldn't kick the little fire ball’s flank. “Rainbow Dash have you lost your mind!?” hiss out Rarity as she and the rest of the group pulled the Blue mare away from the chaos god. “This fella isn’t like Discord and we don’t have the elements or control of our rainbow powers!” Applejack said to Rainbow Dash. “Please, you act like i’m going to rain fire from the sky or something,” if he could change his facial expression from its usual expression, he would more then likely be giving them a flat look right now. The group could only give him a few nervous glance while trying to hold back Rainbow Dash. The only one who wasn’t doing either of those things was the little orange Pegasus that this whole situation was revolving around. Only hesitating for a second, Scootaloo walked towards the chaos god and asked, “Um, Mr. Deadman? Why didn’t I get anything?” “Well I got something in mind for you,” Deadman said, lowering himself down to her level. Suddenly two comically white gloved hands appeared in front of the little filly. Before any of the older mare could do anything, one of Deadman’s hands moved towards Scootaloo’s face and ….booped her. Once Scootaloo felt the gloved hand touch her snout, a light shone above her as a melodious voice sang in her ears. It sounded nice to the filly’s ears until everything went dark as a loud bang was heard. The force from the bang itself caused everyone in the room to topple over as Deadman’s laugh echoed through the room. Getting back to her feet, Scootaloo asked, “What was that for?” “Hahaha! Why don’t you check for yourself?” said the chaos god as he gestured for her to look behind her. Confused at what the fireball was saying, Scootaloo looked behind her and gasped at what he was referring to. Instead of her stubby little wings, there were full grown wings for a pegasus of her age with red tips as they flexed. “Are these… my wings?” asked scootaloo with small quiver in her voice. “Yep! just for you kiddo.” answered Deadman with a gentle voice right before he vanished from sight before the rest of the group got their bearings straight. “Why does he have to do something like that?” Spike asked as Rainbow flew in the air, ready to attack the chaos god. “Alright, what did you do to ….Scootaloo?” Rainbow said, taking a good look at the filly’s wings. “What? Did that brute hurt Scootaloo? If I ever see him again I’ll…. Oh my,” Rarity said, stopping her rant once she saw Scootaloo’s wings. The others were in awe once they got their bearings in order as Scootaloo began to move her wings in wonder. “Did Deadman do this?” Starlight asked, not believing that her godly tormenter would do something like this. “Maybe he’s not so bad after all,” Fluttershy said, hugging Doomguy plushie who had it’s hands raised. The others gave it some thought as Scootaloo bent down and jumped into the air. The older mare watched with baited breaths as Scootaloo began to rise higher and higher in the air and flew around the room. “I can fly,” the filly said as a few tear ran down her face. Rainbow flew up beside her and said, “So how’s it feel?” “Awesome,” Scootaloo said, hugging her idol in mid air. “I can’t wait to show Sweetie and Applebloom. They won’t believe it.” “They sure won’t,” Rainbow said as they separated. “Now why don’t you go find them and we’ll stay here for another episode.” “Wait, can Sweetie and Applebloom watch this?” Scootaloo asked, looking at everyone for an answer. “Well, I guess we can wait for a little while,” Twilight said, smiling at the excitable filly. “But you better hurry,” Rainbow dash said, ruffling Scootaloo’s mane. “Please, with these wings, I’ll be back before you know it,” Scootaloo said as she flew out the window to find her friends. Rainbow looked out the window as a few tears ran down her face as she quietly said, “They grow up so fast.” ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ CHAPTER END! NEXT TIME POKEMON BATTLE ROYALE!!!.
Pokemon Battle royale.Rainbow Dash took her eyes off the window that her little sister figure flew from and looked at the stopwatch she carries with her. She kept on doing this every few seconds as her friends watched her, unsure of why she was doing this. Twilight, being the most curious of her group, walked up towards her speedy friend and cleared her throat. “What’re you doing, Rainbow?” Twilight asked, getting a bit to curious for her own good. “I’m timing Scoots, Twilight. I want to see how long it takes her to get back here,” Rainbow said like it was the most obvious thing. “Darling, I know you’re happy for Scootaloo as am I. But you have to remember that she just got them and she won’t be like you this soon,” Rarity said, not wanting to hurt her friend’s feelings. “What? I know that. I just want to see how she does for her first time,” Rainbow said nonchalantly. “Oh, so you’re just timing her?” Fluttershy asked, propping Doomguy plushie on the couch. “Yup. I wanna know how she can handle,” Rainbow said loudly.Fluttershy moved back suddenly as something fell out of her mane while saying, “Chu.” “Oh, Pichu. Did you fall asleep in my mane again?” Fluttershy asked gently, picking up her pokemon and hugging it gently. Pichu hugged it’s owner while nodding. Before anyone else could say anything, the door was slammed open as a familiar voice asked, “Did you start it yet?” The ponies and one dragon turned to the door to see Scootaloo with her friends Sweetie Belle and Applebloom. The trio ran into the viewing room and took a seat as fast as they could. Scootaloo looked left and right as she asked, “You didn’t start it, right? Right?” “Don’t fret. We wouldn’t have started without y’all,” Applejack said, making room for her little sister. Rarity did the same for Sweetie Belle as she used her magic to ring the snack table a little closer. “AJ’s right, squirt. Oh, it took you nine minutes and eighteen seconds to get them,” Rainbow said matter-of-factly as a pillow hit her. “Yeah, well I had to calm Bloom and Sweetie down when they saw me,” Scootaloo said, rubbing the back of her head as her friends blushed embarrassingly. “It was shocking ta see,” Applebloom muttered. “It was surprising,” Sweetie simply said, hiding behind her sister. “I bet it was,” Starlight said, giggling into her hoof. She looked at the young pegasus to see that there was a hastily wrapping thing in her hooves. Pointing at the package, Starlight asked, “What do you got there, Scootaloo?” “Oh, it’s nothing,” Scootaloo said, hiding the package behind her back. “Can we start the episode now?” “Sure we can,” Pinkie said as she pressed play with her hoof. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Interlude (*Cues: Invader - Jim Johnston*) Wiz: For nearly two decades, people across the globe have struggled endlessly to make one crucial, exhausting, impossible choice. Boomstick: Bulbasaur, Squirtle, or Charmander? “Look Pichu, more pokemon,” said Fluttershy as the little mouse Pokemon looked at the screen with interest. Wiz: It's finally time to learn if the one you chose was really the strongest. Boomstick: And what better way than with their evolved forms? Venusaur, the pimply plant monster. “Interesting creature…” Applebloom mused. Boomstick: Blastoise, the bazooka turtle. “A turtle with giant cannons on its back?!” Rainbow and Scootaloo exclaimed with stars in their eyes. “SO. AWESOME!!” Boomstick: And Charizard, the... Dragon. “I kinda wish Ember was here to see this one…” Spike said. Wiz: For a fair assessment, we're examining maxed out wild Pokémon. For those of you nerdy enough to care, this means no special EV training, no Mega Evolutions… “What's Mega Evolution?” Twilight asked. “Sounds like something someone could get sued for…” said Pinkie Pie while giving the readers a knowing glance. Wiz: ...and no tutor, bred or otherwise unnaturally learned attacks. This way, we'll avoid any and all player influence. Boomstick: He's Wiz and I'm Boomstick. Wiz: And it's our job to analyze their weapons, armor and skills to find out who would win a Death Battle. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Venusaur (*Cues: Setting Off - Pokémon Anime*) Wiz: The first starter Pokémon evolves from Bulbasaur, to Ivysaur and finally, to Venusaur, the Seed Pokémon. Boomstick: Becoming uglier and uglier with every form. Seriously, what the hell is that thing?! “Looks like some sort of frog-plant thing…” Said Applejack. Background Species: Seed Pokémon Type: Grass & Poison Height: 2 m/6'07" Weight: 100 kg/220.5 lbs Natural habitat: Plains, grasslands Personality: Patient, generous, guardian mentality Wiz: Of the three starters, Venusaur is the most well rounded and easiest to raise. In combat, it relies on it's above average Special Attack and Special Defense, or non-physical combat. Statistics HP: 270 - Average Attack: 167 - Below Average Defense: 168 - Average Sp. Attack: 205 - Above Average Sp. Defense: 205 - Above Average Speed: 165 - Average Abilities Overgrow: Increases grass-type powers Chlorophyll: Boosts speed in sunny weather. (*Cues: Rival Theme - Pokémon X/Y*) Boomstick: Old froggy-plant has a variety of moves. Vine Whip's for slappin' bitches and Razor Leaf can cut through whole trees. “I guess the vegetables were tired of us chopping them up and want to return the favor." Pinkie joked, earning a chuckle from everyone. Boomstick: Then there's the less action-packed skills like Sleep Powder, which is used to put foes to sleep, and take women home from bars. “Oh my…” Fluttershy shuddered. “What does he mean si-?” asked Sweetie Belle before being hushed by her sister. “When you're older,” said Rarity trying everything not to curse at boomstick. Wiz: Venusaur's adaptability is it's greatest asset. It can absorb health with Leech Seed like some kind of jungle vampire, or simply heal on it's own by using Synthesis. It also knows Sweet Scent, which aids the poor accuracy of the Sleep and Poison Powders. Boomstick: But why bother with Poisons and Powders when you've got a super laser! Venusaur can absorb so much sun energy, that he can fire the Solar Beam. Venusaur: VENUSAUUR! *Fires Solar Beam, knocking out Ash's Heracross. “WOW!!” Rainbow shouted upon seeing such a display of raw power. Move Set Tackle Growl Vine Whip (Multipurpose whips, inflict low damage) Razor Leaf (Can slice through tree trunks) Seed Bomb Petal Blizzard (Strikes multiple targets) Poison Powder (75% of poisoning target) Sleep Powder (75% of putting target to sleep) Leech Seed (Slowly absorbs target's health over time) Synthesis (Uses sunlight to restore 25% health) Sweet Scent (Decreases target's evasion) Double Edge (Powerful tackle, 33% recoil damage) Petal Dance (Powerful sp. attack, confuses user) Solar Beam (Very powerful beam, requires time to charge solar energy) (*Cues: Reflection Cave - Pokémon X/Y*) Boomstick: When I find flowers that can do that, I might actually take up gardening. “That would be the world's most deadliest garden!” Applebloom smirked before turning to Applejack. “Say sis…” “NO.” “I wouldn't mind adding a few flowers like that to my garden…” Spike smiled… before noticing the looks he was getting. "What? I have hobbies!” Boomstick (and Spike): Try and pollinate now, bees! Wiz: In real life, celestially powered lasers rely on heated magnesium combustion. In order to fire, the Solar Beam's temperature needs to be over 6,700 ºF. Unfortunately, the Solar Beam is so powerful, it takes twice as long to perform as any other attack. As a Grass and Poison type, Venusaur is extremely effective against Water-type Pokémon. (*Cues: Successor Korrina - Pokémon X/Y*) Boomstick: But keep him away from Flying and Fire types. Because, as we all know, plants burn, and birds fucking hate grass. “I get the fire weakness, but what's with the weakness to flying types?" Starlight asked in curiosity. Twilight thought for a moment. “Well, if I had to guess I'd say that flying is also a wind element and powerful winds can rip apart plants.” “Ohhh” said the rest of the group in understanding. Wiz: Yet Venusaur's well-rounded skills and tricky moveset could outsmart the competition. “Sometimes brain beats brawn,” stated Starlight, getting a few nods. Pros & Cons Effective against: Fighting, Water, Grass, Electric, Fairy Weak against: Flying, Fire, Psychic, Ice Pro: Diverse move set Pro: Great status effecting moves Con: Little specialization Con: Too few effective Sp. Attacks to justify above average stat Kanto Pokédex: Venusaur, the final form of the Bulbasaur evolution. This Seed Pokémon soaks on the sun's rays as a source of energy. “I'll bet Tree Hugger would like him.” Fluttershy said with a Smile. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ The group liked the grass type for its varying move pool and Twilight like the fact someone would need to use strategy for it. “I’m rooting for Venusaur!,” cheered Apple Bloom. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Blastoise (*Cues: Fighting Spirit - Pokémon Anime*) Wiz: The second starter Pokémon evolves from Squirtle, to Wartortle and finally, to Blastoise, the Shellfish Pokémon. Boomstick: So how did this thing come about?! (Shows stage in the background that shows all the events he describes) Did a turtle get really drunk one night, and then come across a tank and was like, "Eh, I'll put my dick in that!" Then nine months later, the tank showed up at his door and was like "BOOM! This is yours." Then he raised it out of shame, until one day it evolved and all the other turtles were like "THAT'S FUCKING AWESOME!" So then they all started plowing tanks?! By the time he finished everyone was on the floor holding their sides as they laughed at such a ridiculous story. “Ok i have to admit that was funny,” laughed Rarity as she wiped a few tears from her eyes. Background Species: Shellfish Pokémon Type: Water Height: 5'3" Weight: 189 lbs. Natural Habitat: Lakes & Islands Personality: Stubborn, Solitary, Warrior Mentality (*Cues: Team Rocket's Secret Strategy - Pokémon Anime*) Wiz: Suurree, why not...? (*cue Fighting Spirit again*) Blastoise firmly boasts defense over offense, using his weighty bulk to outlast and overpower foes. Like a stone firm upon the shore, he can take wave after wave of punishment. “That’s actually a pretty smart thing to do,” Starlight said, stroking her chin. Boomstick: As poetic as that was, he won't be winning any marathons. He's almost as slow as a tortoise, which makes sense, unlike the giant guns sticking out of his back! “Oh! What if he turned around, retreated into his shell, and used the cannons to fly backward?!” Scootaloo said, already imagining how fast it would go. “Then he couldn't see where he would be going,” pointed out Sweetie Bell getting a blush from Scootaloo, for not thinking about that little issue. Statistics HP: 268 (Average) Attack: 171 (Below Average) Defense: 205 (Above Average) Sp. Attack: 215 (Average) Sp. Defense: 193 (Above Average) Speed: 161 (Average) Abilities: Torrent (increases water powers) Rain Dish (recovers HP in rain) (*Cues: Legendary Pokémon Battle - Pokémon X/Y*) Wiz: Blastoise can significantly reduce incoming damage with Iron Defense, barrel through hazards with Rapid Spin, and guard against any and all attacks with Protect. “Looks like it can protect itself from anything,” Applejack said as she whistled. “You think it could takes the elements if you girls still had them?” Spike asked his friend/sister. “I’m not sure to tell the truth,” Twilight said, shrugging. Boomstick: He can chomp foes with Bite and crack heads with Skull Bash, but most of his arsenal focuses on water power, blasting foes with Water Gun, Water Pulse, Aqua Tail and...Bubbles! “FUCKING BUBBLES!” All of a sudden a light tan colored earth pony with glasses and a goatee wearing a black cap and red tie came out of nowhere scaring the group right before disappearing right before their eye’s. “Wha-what was that?” asked a confused Twilight not believing what happened. Starlight just as confused said. “That just came out of nowhere with no sense of-” “TIMING!” screamed a ghost before it to disappeared just like the weird earth pony. “Ok this is just getting weird,” muttered Rainbow Dash. “Agreed this weird events are coming out of nowhere and disappearing too fast to even be considered important to the plot,” said Rarity. “A BIG LIPPED ALLIGATOR MOMENT!” “... is that you Deadman?” asked Applejack with a flat look pointed upward as if Deadman was watching them from the heavens… she really should be looking somewhere more south. (hey fuck you man!) “NO!” scream the voice of the chaos god. Everyone besides the confused members of the CMC just gave him a flat look. “... Ya.” admitted the voice in defeat. Wiz: But despite it's lack of attack type diversity, Blastoise can maximize its watery weaponry with Rain Dance, a rain storm that amplifies Water type moves and blocks out the sun. “That's so cool!” cheered Sweetie Belle with stars in her eyes. Boomstick: But his ultimate attack is Hydro Pump, where he blasts water out of his twin cannons with enough force to accurately punch through steel at a range of 160 feet. Moveset Tackle Tail Whip Iron Defense (drastically increases Defense stat) Rapid Spin (can clear ground hazards, like spikes) Protect (shields from all attacks) Flash Cannon Bite Skull Bash (requires time to charge up power) Water Gun Water Pulse (may confuse target) Aqua Tail Bubble (may lower target's speed) Rain Dance (creates rainfall, which increases water moves by 50%) Hydro Pump (ultra-powerful water cannon with 80% hit rate; can punch through steel) (*Cues: Kanto Elite Four/Gym Battle Theme - Pokémon Anime*) Wiz: High pressure water jet cutters are used industrially to cut through metal with at least 55,000 PSI, or pounds per square inch. By measuring Blastoise's cannons in comparison to his size, we can tell his Hydro Pump has a power of 90,000 PSI. Boomstick: That'll get the stains off your patio! Along with, your patio and possibly house. “Ya think,” snarked Sweetie Belle getting a proud look from her sister. Wiz: Blastoise is effective against Fire type Pokémon, but weak to Grass and Electric. “Well i gauss you could beat him huh?” asked Fluttershy while her Pichu puffed out its chest in Pride. Boomstick: And when he's not battling, Blastoise can be found training on secluded islands to strengthen his combat skills. Wiz: If it plays it's defenses right, Blastoise just might outlast everyone. “Sometimes the best offense is a good defence,” lectured Twilight. “Don’t you think you're a little biased with your Brother being the master of defence?” asked Rainbow dash with a smirk, getting an embarrassed Blush from her friends as an answer. Pros & Cons Effective Against: Fire, Water, Ice, & Steel Pro: Great Defensive Potential Pro: Can shoot through steel Weak Against: Grass & Electric Con: Lacks options for attacks Con: Not very fast or mobile Kanto Pokédex: Blastoise's strength lies in it's power, rather than it's speed. It's shell is like armor, and attacks from the hydro cannons on it's back are virtually unstoppable. “That has to be the most awesome turtle I've ever seen!" Rainbow said, completely guessing over the awesomeness of said Pokémon. “What about Tank?” Pinkie asked. “He's the most awesome tortoise, big difference.” ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ The group had to admire the walking fortress like Pokemon and it small but powerful attacks. “Blastoise all the way,” cheered Sweetie belle. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Charizard (*Cues: Pokémon I Choose You - Pokémon Anime*) Wiz: The final starter Pokémon evolves from Charmander, to Charmeleon, and finally, to Charizard, the Flame Pokémon. Boomstick: I would so ride that into battle! “Me too!” Scootaloo smiled. Wiz: Well, that could be tough. A full grown Charizard is only five-foot seven-inches tall. Boomstick: What?! That's bullshit! I wanna ride a dragon to burn the villages of my enemies, not hang out with it on the sofa. “Hey we dragons like to just hang out to you know!” yelled Spike before giving an annoyed huff at the blatant Stereotypes about dragons. Background: Species: Flame Pokémon Type: Fire & Flying Height: 1.7 m / 5'07" Weight: 90.5 kg / 199.5 Ilbs Natural Habitat: Mountains, Valleys Personality: Aggressive, Prideful, Warrior Mentality Wiz: Despite its size, Charizard is extremely fast and extremely powerful. It's Speed and Special Attack eclipse the other two starters' twice over, the trade off being unfortunate frailty. Boomstick: But since he can fly, it's pretty hard to get ahold of him. “He’s got a point. Charizard is harder to hit when it flies around,” Rainbow said, wondering how fast that dragon could go. Statistics HP: 266 - Average Attack: 173 - Below average Defense: 161 - Below Average Sp. Attack: 223 - Above Average Sp. Defense: 175 - Average Speed: 205 - Above Average (*Cues: Victory Road Theme - Pokémon X/Y*) Wiz: Charizard's move set is incredibly diverse, ranging from the obvious fire breath to flying, dragon, and even ghost type attacks. “That’s impressive,” Twilight said simply. “Impressive? More like AWESOME,” Rainbow, Spike and Scootaloo said at the same time. Boomstick: At close range, he'll always have an edge up, by using either Slash, Dragon Claw, or Shadow Claw; He can strike from above with Wing Attack or Air Slash; but his real strength lies in the flames. He'll burn and bite you with Fire Fang, trap you in a vortex of embers with Fire Spin; smash you apart with Flare Blitz... Wiz: At the cost of self inflicted recoil damage. “Ouch. That’s not a move you should use a lot,” Scootaloo said as she winced a bit. Boomstick: ...And of course, burn you to cinders with Flame Burst or Flamethrower. Wiz: Charizard can reportedly burn through solid stone. This means his Flamethrower reaches temperatures over 2,000 degrees Fahrenheit. “Woah,” Spike said, amazed by Charizard’s breathe. Move Set Scratch Growl Smokescreen Dragon Rage Slash Dragon Claw Shadow Claw (Ghost-type move with increased Critical-hit chance) Air Slash Wing Attack Fire Fang Heat Wave Fire Spin (Traps target in vortex of flame) Flare Blitz (Powerful flaming tackle, deals 33% recoil damage) Flame Burst (Burns surrounding area, hits multiple targets) Flamethrower (Powerful flame stream, May burn target, Can melt boulders) Boomstick: Charizards are aggressive and warrior-like, and will actively seek fights with stronger opponents. “That can make them very dangerous,” Rarity said, imagining one getting stronger than Twilight or the princesses. Wiz: The Fire and Flying type combination makes Charizard doubly effective against Grass Pokémon, but weak to Water types. If it spends too much time in a heavy rainstorm, its flame will go out... permanently. “The Flame on it’s tail is it’s life!?” gasped out Fluttershy along with everything else Pros & Cons Effective against: Grass, Bug, Steel, Fire, Fighting, Fairy Weak against: Rock, Water, Electric Pro: Great speed & maneuverability Pro: Immune to ground-type attacks Con: Frail defense Con: Difficult to raise & control Boomstick: But he's so fast and deadly, he might just overpower his enemies before they know what hit 'em. Unova Pokédex: Charizard, the Flame Pokémon. When competing in intense battles, Charizard's flame becomes more intense as well. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ The group wear really impressed with Charizard’s rw power. “I’m so rooting For Charizard!” yelled Scootaloo. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Wiz: All right. The contestants are ready. Let’s end this debate once and for all. Boomstick: It's time for a Death Battllllllleeeeee with the pokemon! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Death Battle (*Cues: Pokémon X and Y - Pokémon Center*) In a forest clearing on a sunny day, a wild Bulbasaur, Squirtle and Charmander are all sitting around happily. “Aw… they all look so cute!” cooed the CMC and Fluttershy. Suddenly, a claw-like machine appears and drops in a massive amount of at least 300 Rare Candies, covering up the three starter Pokémon. “YAY! Free candy!” Pinkie cheered. Then after a brief moment, bright lights start emitting from the pile of level increasing sweets. “WHAT THE HECK WAS IN THAT CANDY?!” Starlight asked “... Poke Steroids?” half answered half asked Pinkie Pie with a shrug. (*Cues: Super Smash Bros. Brawl - Victory Road*) After an explosion of light which knocked away all the Rare Candies, we see three new, fully evolved, maxed out Pokémon: A quadruped dinosaur-like creature with a large fully bloomed flower on its back, Venusaur, the Seed Pokémon. A large, blue turtle standing on its back-legs with what appears to be water cannons sticking out from its shell, Blastoise, the Shellfish Pokémon. And an anthropomorphic lizard with wings on its back which made it resemble a dragon with a flame burning on its tail, Charizard, the Flame Pokémon. FIGHT! The battle begins with Charizard leaping straight up into the air. He turns around and charges at Blastoise, hitting the turtle with Slash. Blastoise then uses Withdraw, going into its shell, and then follows it up with Iron Defense. Charizard then comes back, trying to attack Blastoise again, but several strikes and a Flamethrower have no effect on the Shellfish Pokémon's upped defenses. “Going to need to do better than that,” bragged Sweetie Belle getting a growl of frustration from Scootaloo. “Grrr… Go Charizard. You can do it,” Scootaloo yelled excitedly. Venusaur then joins the fray, attacking both Pokémon with Razor Leaf. Blastoise takes no damage, staying in it's shell, but Charizard does take some. The dragon, ignoring Venusaur then picks up Blastoise, flies into the air and throws the Water-type to the ground. Blastoise uses Rapid Spin in midair and aims itself at Venusaur, hitting him head on. “That looks painful,” Applejack said, wincing a bit. “Yeah. I don’t want to be hit by that,” Pinkie said, wincing as well. Blastoise jumps away from the dinosaur and finally comes out of its shell and attack Venusaur again with a Skull Bash, knocking the dinosaur back a bit. Charizard then makes a comeback, hitting Blastoise with a Flare Blitz, but it does no damage, and the two are locked in a power struggle, with neither one making any progress. “Another battle of unstoppable force meets the immovable object,” Applejack muttered to herself. Behind them, Venusaur uses Synthesis to heal himself, and then Sweet Scent to lower his opponent's evasion. Charizard and Blastoise stop their battle, wondering what is happening. Venusaur then uses Sleep Powder to try and put his foes to sleep. The effects start to take a toll on the two, but Charizard flies up to avoid them just before they take complete effect, and Blastoise retreats to it's shell and uses a second Iron Defense before succumbing to the effects of the powder. “Smart Move on his part now he’s protected while the other two fight,” said Twilight with some respect. Venusaur targets the fleeing Charizard with Vine Whip to catch the large lizard by the tail and hold him still as he prepares to fire a Solar Beam. However, with a mighty roar, the fire/flying Pokémon escapes from the Vine Whip's grasp and charges straight for Venusaur. But before he can get to him, Venusaur finishes charging and fires the Solar Beam at Charizard, who quickly retaliates with a Flamethrower. “HIT THE DECK!" yelled Spike. The two attacks collide, and both are equally powerful. The attacks continue to go, as Charizard is seen attempting to close in on the Grass type, but Solar Beam is beginning to get a slight edge over Flamethrower. But soon enough, the attacks created a huge explosion as the screen fades to black… “EXPLOSIONS!!!” Pinkie yelled while waving her arms. “We know, Darling,” Rarity said, glaring at the party mare. (*Cues: Pokémon X/Y - Battle! Lysandre (Guitar)*) When the screen returns the environment is a complete wasteland. Venusaur is surrounded by dust, making it hard to see. Venusaur looks around to see where his opponents have gone. He sees nothing, but then out of the dust Charizard flies in with a Wing Attack straight at Venusaur. Charizard strikes the Seed Pokémon, ripping Venusaur's flower off as it roars in pain. Charizard then retreats after completely cutting through the Seed Pokémon and fires a Flame Burst, which surrounds Venusaur. The plant monster roars as it tries to escape the flames, and struggles twice, letting out a final roar into the air before ultimately dying. “.... ow,” winced AppleBloom feeling bad that her chosen Pokemon lost like that. “Ya..” everyone else agreed. Feeling bad for the plant Pokemon. The scene then switches over to a still sleeping Blastoise as Venusaur's ripped off flowers rolls by like a tumbleweed. Some dust/smoke goes into the turtle's shell causing it to sneeze itself awake. Upon coming to, he looks at his remaining adversary Charizard on the other side of the wasteland. “Oh come on. The loud explosion turning the forest into a wasteland didn’t wake him up but a sneeze did?” Twilight asked, wanting to rant about that. (*Cues: Pokémon FRLG - Kanto Trainer Battle (Remix)*) The screen starts flashing, as it eventually breaks into black and a Pokéball comes down and toward the viewer, in reference to the start of wild battles in the Pokémon games. “HA HAH! Fan service!” laughed Pinkie Pie with a black eyepatch. Blastoise starts off with Rain Dance to make the battle more favorable to him in the final showdown. As the rain comes down, the two Pokémon simply stand there. Then with a crash of lightning, the two roar and commence their final fight. “So cool!” muttered the CMC as they watch the tv with wide eyes. Charizard uses multiple Slashes but on his last strike as he tries to slash Blastoise's head, the Water-type tilts it at the last second making Charizard miss and leaving him vulnerable. Blastoise uses Bite on Charizard's neck and the Fire-type begins to bleed and in agony uses Fire Spin on the ground which surrounds them in flames. Blastoise then grabs a hold of Charizard's wings and uses Skull Bash and we see blood come out from behind them, but Charizard comes back and begins to chomping on Blastoise's head multiple times, causing him to bleed heavily just above his left eye. Blastoise then lets out a roar and with all his strength rips Charizard's wings off as he is launched away from the force, landing away with a closed eye that's covered in blood, but the bleeding stops after a few seconds. “No, Charizard. Fight back,” Scootaloo said to the screen. As the two Pokémon try to get up from their injuries, Blastoise gets up much faster and uses this as his opportunity to attack. As Charizard gets up, Blastoise grabs his throat. Charizard tries to use Flamethrower, but Blastoise uses both hands to grip Charizard's neck, causing him to choke it back, and the attack is stopped. Blastoise bends over and begins shooting a Hydro Pump directly into Charizard's mouth. Charizard begins to distend due to being filled with all the water. Blastoise lets go of Charizard with a roar, and launches Charizard into the air. Blastoise continues to accurately shoot water into his midair opponent's mouth, until Charizard bursts out into a big, bloody mess from the water inside him. “This caused the group to go green in the Face. “Well that was a sucky way to die,” muttered Spike. As the Rain Dance ends and the Fire Spin is extinguished, Blastoise yells out a triumphant roar. The Shellfish Pokémon then proceeds to eat the remains of Venusaur's flower while Charizard's remains are shown on the ground, all covered in blood as the flame on its tail goes out. “Um, guess it was hungry?” Fluttershy asked while hiding behind Doomguy plushie. “Too soon, Fluttershy,” Twilight said, pointing at the shocked CMC. K.O.! Results (*Cues: Total War - Pokémon Anime*) Boomstick: CHARIZARD! Noooo! Oh, and Froggy-Plant-whatever-asaur. “Really?” asked the Apple Sibling with flat looks. Wiz: Charizard's greater speed allowed first attack, and it's proud warrior mentality lead to striking Blastoise first. “Which was a stupid idea to attack the thing with your biggest weakness,” Spike said unimpressed. Boomstick: But Venusaur knew he had to take Charizard down right away, so everyone's favorite fire lizard was doomed, taking too much damage early on from two different angles. “Sadly that’s what happens when your the biggest threat,” said Starlight in a matter of fact tone. Wiz: But poor Venusaur didn't stand a chance against Charizard's dual typing, and the bulky defense of Blastoise was more than enough to outlast both of them. Also since Charizard and Venusaur do not naturally learn Sunny Day, they could not counter the Rain Dance. Boomstick: "But Wizard, shouldn't they all just counter each other?!" Wiz: Ah, yes, the 'rock-paper-scissors' factor is a bit tricky; grass beats water, water beats fire, fire beats grass; but ultimately, the core of any Pokémon battle boils down to mathematics. Every attack does a specific amount of damage, with specific effects to specific types with a specific accuracy. “AWW YA MATH!” cheered Twilight with a hoof pump (fist pump.) with a huge grin. “Neeerd!” yelled Rainbow Dash… before getting a pillow thrown at her face by a glaring Twilight. “Twilight used pillow throw! It was super effective!” giggled out Pinkie Pie causing everyone else to laugh even Rainbow Dash. Boomstick: And each Pokémon's stats are clearly displayed in the good ol' Pokedex. Wiz: So by comparing every move, effect, choice, order, and likeliness of occurrence, there are over 7,000 possible ways this battle royale could play out. And out of all potential matches, Blastoise wins the majority. “That’s a lot of possiblities,”the CMC said quietly. Boomstick: Even when removing type effectiveness entirely, and pitting attack and special attack against defense and special defense, factoring against health and speed, the turtle tank still takes it. Blastoise H2Owned! “Darn right he did!” Rainbow Dash cheered. Wiz: The winner is Blastoise. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Boomstick: Next time on Death Battle! At first they see nothing until they saw a menacing robot preparing for an attack, when suddenly it opened up it's chest and fired a large devastating laser beam and the screen turned black. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ “That was so cool,” Sweetie said, jumping around her friends in excitement. “But Charizard should have won,” Scootaloo said as she pouted. “At least yours didn’t get beat first,” Applebloom grumbled to herself. Seeing her older sister and friends walk towards a glowing box, Applebloom asked, “What’re they doing?” “They’re going to the box to get stuff,” Scootaloo said, taking flight. “We gotta see what we’ll get,” she said, flying to her idol. Sweetie and Applebloom soon followed as they heard what Scootaloo got and were excited to get some cool stuff as well. Once they were in front of the box with the older mares, Starlight used her magic to open the box and look inside. Taking a quick look, Starlight pulled out a bunch of T-shirt with all three starters on them and handed them out to everyone but the three fillies in the group. Before anyone could say anything, an unfamiliar voice said, “Don’t even think about asking.” Everyone turned to see a floating blue glowing bubble the size of a baseball. They wanted to ask the most obvious question, when the voice said, “Yes I said it and we’re gonna skip all those questions about Deadman.” “Wait, you know Deadman,” Starlight asked, getting a bit more cautious with the new comer. Her friends had the same idea as they prepared themselves for the worst. “Yes, I know Dumbass,” the voice said monotone like. “Um, you mean Deadman?” Spike asked. “Yes, I mean Dumbass,” the glowing bubble said once more. “Ok? So who’re you?” Rainbow asked, clearly not trusting the bubble. “The name’s Trepp, chaos god of order,” the bubble, Trepp, said. “And current delivery boy.” “Delivery boy? What’re you delivering, Treppy? Cake? Candy?” Pinkie Pie asked, looking at the bubble from all sides. Trepp stayed silent for a moment before saying, “No. I’m here to give those three fillies something.” The older mares and young dragon look at the fillies as Scootaloo walks forward and says, “You have something for me and my friends?” “Yes, by his grand dumbass wisdom, Deadman gives you three these special treats,” Trepp said monotone as three balls appeared in front of each filly. “Speaking of that fiery fellow, where is he?” Applejack asked, much to Trepp’s annoyance. “He’s dealing with some very important things at the moment,” Trepp said a little too quickly for the older mare’s liking. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ meanwhile with Deadman ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ “THIS IS FUCKING BULLSHIT!” Screamed Deadman as he slammed his poker cards down onto the table. “*heh* you just need a better poker face.” said a Blue humanoid dragon as he scooped up most of deadman's poker chips. “FUCK YOU SCALE FACE!” yelled the fiery god of chaos in rage. Another player that looked like it was made up of tornadoes gave of a panic look and tried to calm Deadman down. “(worried wind noise)” “Hahaha! You tell them Windy!” laughed a talking skeleton wearing an old western get up while smoking a cigar. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ “Anyways, it’s nothing for mortals like yourselves to worry about,” Trepp said in a non caring sort of way. “So we got those pokeballs from the episode?” Sweetie asked, lightly poking the one in front of her. The light poke caused the ball to open as a white beam of pure energy came out and landed in front of her. The energy stated to form little arms and legs as the body began to round itself out. The energy began to disappear and show a familiar blue skinned turtle as it said, “Squirtle.” “MY OWN SQUIRTLE?” Sweetie yelled, hugging the turtle happily. The water pokemon gave her a hug back, happy to have a friendly trainer and friend. “She got a pokemon?” Scootaloo and Applebloom said at the same time. Looking at the pokeballs in front of them, the two touch them causing the same beams of light to appear as Bulbasaur and Charmander to appear. “Char char,” Charmander said, waving cutely. “Bulba,” Bulbasaur said. “This is AWESOME,” Applebloom and Scootaloo said, examining their own pokemon. “Fillies with Pokemon? Only that idiot would give children some dangerous monsters,” Trepp said as everyone focused on him. “You mean Deadman gave these cute and cuddly creatures to them?” Fluttershy asked as Pichu walked towards its fellow pokemon and greeted them. The three new pokemon waved at the electric mouse, causing the shy caretaker to squee in joy. “Yes, now I need to go and make sure that dumbass doesn’t destroy anything important,” Trepp said, getting ready to leave. “Wait,” Scootaloo said as she ran towards the chaos god with her wrapped package. Looking down at the filly, Trepp said, “What do you want little filly?” “Well, when you see Mr. Deadman, can you give him this for me,” Scootaloo said, holding out the wrapped package. Trepp made a glowing blue hand that took the package from the filly as he began to inspect it. Glancing at the filly once more, Trepp said, “Mr. Deadman, huh? Never thought I would hear that in my life. Very well, I’ll make sure he gets it.” Trepp’s bubble began to vibrate as it popped and let out a “SQUEAK” noise and disappeared from sight. It was quiet for a few moments before Applebloom said, “Let’s have a Pokemon Battle.” “Not in my castle girls!” Twilight screamed. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ (Meanwhile with Trepp) Trepp appeared back in a galaxy like room as he made his way to the center of it. As he got closer to his usual spot, Trepp could swear he heard the sound of a man swearing up a storm as Deadman’s back became more visible. “Hey, package delivery,” Trepp said as he walked past his acquaintance and gave him the package. “Huh? But I don’t get mail, except for the love letters from Harmony,” Deadman said, looking at the package in interest. “Those were hate mail and restraining orders you dumbass. Now just open your package,” Trepp said, picking up a book titled “To Hell And Back”. “Who would give me a gift?” Deadman muttered to himself, ripping the paper off without using his hands. Once the paper was off, Deadman could only stare at the gift in front of him. Deadman smiled as he looked at a framed picture of a hand or hoof drawn picture of himself, Rainbow Dash and Scootaloo flying through the air with the words “Thank You” were on the bottom. “... This is going on the fridge,” Deadman said, getting up from his little spot. “We don’t have a fridge,” Trepp said, not looking at him. “Now we do,” Deadman said as a refrigerator appeared out of nowhere. He floated over to it and placed the framed picture on it as a few tears ran down his face. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ CHAPTER END! NEXT TIME Fulgore VS Sektor!
Fulgore vs SektorIt was a new day for Spike as he was pacing around the room while holding a scroll. Taking a quick glance at the clock hanging on the wall, he began to pace even faster. “C’mon, when will they get here?” Spike asked himself as he looked at the scroll he was carrying. The scroll was from Twilight and it said that she went with her friends to the spa for the day. Once Spike read the note, he contacted Shining and the others and invited them to watch the next episode. “Are they gonna come or not?” Spike asked himself. Just as he was gonna leave the room, Spike heard a knock coming from the door. Spike ran to the door, bumping into the couch on the way, and opened the door. Right outside the door was Shining Armor, Flash Sentry and Thorax. “Sorry we're late, Sunburst ended up getting the flu and couldn't make it-wait, where is everyone else?" Shining asked. “Big Mac had to make a last-minute delivery to Manhattan and Discord had to skip out on this one, said something about dealing with a “stupid reality-bending dorito named Bill”... he vanished before I could ask for details.” Spike shrugged. “Bummer.” Thorax sighed. “Well we owe it to them to have fun in their place,” Spike said enthusiastically. “Are you ready to watch the next episode?” Before the stallions could even voice their opinion, a familiar feminine voice yelled, “Spike, we’re home early.” “Oh Crabbasket,” Spike muttered causing the stallions to snicker. Spike watched as Twilight walked into view with the rest of her friends following her. “Yeah, Aloe and Lotus had to close early. Shining?” Twilight asked in surprise. “Hey Twiley,” Shining said as Twilight ran over and nuzzled him. “What’re you doing here? Is Cadance here? What about Flurry Heart?” Twilight began to ask as everyone rolled their eyes. “Relax Twiley. Cadance and Flurry Heart are still in the Crystal Empire and Spike wanted to do another guy’s night out,” Shining said, calming Twilight a little bit. The lavender alicorn looked at Spike for an explanation. “Well, you and the girls were gonna be gone for the day so I invited them to watch the episode with me,” Spike said, scratching the back of his head. “You were what?” Twilight asked annoyed. Spike took a step back as Thorax stood in front of him. Clearing his throat, the changeling said, “Please don’t be mad at Spike. He just wanted to hang out with us and watch something with the guys.” “C’mon Twilight. We can’t stay mad at Spike,” Pinkie said, hugging Spike tightly. Twilight looked at the rest of her friends and saw that they agreed with Pinkie and the others. Letting out a sigh, Twilight reluctantly said, “You’re right. I shouldn’t be mad at that but you shouldn’t have sneaked around behind our backs like that.” “Noted,” Spike said as he tried to break Pinkie’s hug. “Well now that that’s done, let’s start this thing,” Flash said, walking towards the couch. “Oh, hi Flash! How are things in the Empire?” Twilight asked the Lieutenant. “Not too bad, though I am hoping to get transferred here sometime soon… my little brother’s been eager to hang out with me when I'm off-duty…” Flash said “You sure that's the only reason you want to transfer?" She asked with a knowing smile. Flash blushed a little. “W-Well, I have been meaning to spend more time with-” Twilight giggled and gently punched his shoulder. “Relax Flash, I'm only teasing.” Twilight used her magic to press the play button and start the episode. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Interlude (*Cues: Invader - Jim Johnston*) Boomstick: Cyborgs... are fucking badass! “I’m already liking this episode,” Rainbow said with a large smirk. Wiz: As someone with my own cybernetic arm that suffers constant glitches, I have to agree! Cyborgs are awesome! “Wow wiz seems excited too,” said Fluttershy. “Ya we- wait did he just say cybernetic arm?” asked Twilight as she focused all of her attention on the show now. ‘Here we go…’ thought Shining Armor and Spike trying to suppress their smirks. Boomstick: Like Fulgore, the metal monster of Killer Instinct. “Sweet! Another Killer Instinct character!” cheered Rainbow Dash. Wiz: And Sektor, the ninja cyborg from Mortal Kombat. “Ninja Cyborg!?” yelled an excited Pinkie Pie. “That is the coolest thing!” cheered Flash with stars in his eye’s. “Of all time,” agreed Shining Armor, with a grin. Boomstick: Totally should've been Cyrax... “Huh? Looks just like the red fella,” commented Applejack. (*Wiz punches Boomstick with his robot arm*) Boomstick: AHAHH! What the hell?! “HA!” laughed Rarity with the biggest grin on her face. Wiz: (*sarcastic tone*) Oh sorry. Arm's glitching up again. Boomstick: When you least expect it, Wiz. When you least expect it. Everyone giggled. Wiz: I'm Wizard and he's Boomstick. And, it's our job to analyze their weapons, armor, and skills to find out who would win a DEATH BATTLE. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Fulgore (*Cues: Fulgore's Theme - Killer Instinct Teaser*) Wiz: In the dystopian world of Killer Instinct, there are no governments, no courts, no nations. There is only the mega corporation that controls the Earth. Boomstick: Wal-Mar- um, UltraTech! Wiz: To tighten his iron grip even further, UltraTech's chairman plotted to build an army of cybernetic enforcers. Thus, he created the deadly sadistic prototype known as Fulgore. (*Cues: Killer Instinct 2: Gold - Fulgore Theme*) Boomstick: Fulgore... now there's a name that will strike fear into your enemies. Just saying it gives me chills. Standing 6'5" with over 500 pounds of reinforced steel, Fulgore is a brutal killing machine. All while rocking a stylish ponytail. Steven Seagal would be proud. “Who’s Steven Seagal?” asked Fluttershy. “Don’t know but he sounds like a cool guy,” answered Rainbow Dash with a shrug. Wiz: Actually, to dupe people into trusting their cyborgs, UltraTech cleverly designed Fulgore to look the part of an honorable knight, helmet plume included. “Devious… but clever…” muttered Shining Armor with a frown. Flash nodded in agreement with his commander. “I really don’t like the idea of a killer robot parading around looking like a knight.” Boomstick: Call it what you want, Wiz: that's a ponytail. “Yeah, I can't really see that as anything else…” Rainbow added. Wiz: Before testing the prototype even began UltraTech had sold over 15 million Fulgore units worldwide, and if RoboCop's ED-209 has taught us anything, that's a bad idea. “Selling an invention before it's even tested? That's as stupid as it is dangerous!” Twilight commented with the group nodding in agreement. “Sounds like something the FlimFlam bros. would try…” Applejack added. “To be fair the FlimFlam brother’s super cider squeezy 6000 at least worked before they put it on overdrive,” commented Fluttershy. Applejack gave what Fluttershy a thought before giving a nod of agreement, even if she was reluctant to it. Background Height: 1.96 m / 6'5" Weight: 249.5 kg / 550 Ibs Manufacturer: Ultratech Cyber-Soldier prototype Artificial Intelligence based on KI Champion Black Eagle (Chief Thunder's younger brother) Mission: Kill Jago, conquer the world! Owner of the Hype Beam Boomstick: Someone finally had the bright idea to see if this thing even worked and entered Fulgore into UltraTech's annual Killer Instinct tournament. “Sounds like a decent idea,” muttered Starlight. “They get to test their toy out on living opponents in a situation where they wouldn't get in trouble with the law.” “Oh? Is this some input from your time as “evil Glimmer”?” joked Rarity, getting a light punch on the shoulder from a blushing Starlight. Wiz: Sure enough, there was a major problem: Fulgore's mechanical body was SO advanced, UltraTech's top scientists could not create an artificial intelligence that could operate it efficiently. “Oops.” Flash deadpanned sarcastically. “I get the feeling a LOT of people wanted their money back…” “This is why you test everything out before sending it into the field.” Twilight nodded. “If I pulled a stunt like that, who knows what Robo-Dash would've done-” Rainbow blinked. “Wait, what?” “Nothing!” “No seriously, what was that about a robot me-” “OH LOOK! MORE BACKSTORY!” Boomstick: Fulgore needed the mind of a true fighting spirit. (*Cues: Killer Instinct (2013) - Thunder Theme*) Boomstick: Enter Eagle, the older brother of current KI combatant Chief Thunder. Wiz: Eagle had entered a previous KI tournament, and won. He used his newfound fame to publicly protest the evils of UltraTech. The people rallied, talk of revolution began to seed. “Good for him! Fight the power!” Pinkie cheered. “*giggle* You sound like Treehugger,” Fluttershy laughed softly. Boomstick: But then some guy at UltraTech, probably the one who wanted to test Fulgore, was like; "Hey! Let's kill Eagle, stop his revolution, then rip out his brain and drop it in our robot." Eagle mysteriously disappeared, Fulgore started kicking ass, and that guy probably got a promotion. The group stared wide eyed and even a few teared up for Eagle. “That is messed up.” muttered Shining with a downcast look. “Maybe I could put Rainbow’s brain in my robot-what am i thinking?! I can't do that to my friend!” Twilight muttered to herself. She shook her head to clear those impure thoughts from her mind. Wiz: With the implanted mind of Eagle, Fulgore effortlessly smashed through foe after foe. However, Eagle still lives somewhere within, constantly fighting to overcome his malicious programming, and horribly ironic situation. “So, it's kind of like Robocop but even more tragic?" Flash asked. "That's just depressing…” Boomstick: Fulgore draws from Eagle's traditional Okichitaw fighting style, which crosses judo, Taekwondo, and Hapkido with short ranged blades. “Those sound pretty impressive,” Thorax said with everyone agreeing with him. Wiz: Like his quad plasma claws, which can cut through almost any metal with temperatures over 30,000*F. Boomstick: In addition he's equipped with everything a badass killer cyborg should have: Plasma Storm fireballs, a Reflector to bounce back projectiles, a Cyber Port, a cloaking device, and laser eyes for flair. “Well of course everything needs flare darling!” sang Rarity in delight. “Even killer robots?” asked Applejack with a raised brow. The fashionista just gave her southern friend a stern look and simply said, “everything.” Move Set Plasma Claws Plasma Storm - Fulgore shoots out a plasma wave projectile from his claws. Can be done three times. Eye Laser - Fulgore emits an laser from his eyes. Also can be perform in the air. Reflector - Fulgore emits a reflective blue energy shield that surrounds his entire body granting him the ability repel projectiles that are thrown at him. Cyber Dash - Fulgore moves at Quick Speed hitting the opponent with his plasma claw. Cyber Port - Fulgore's body turns black, enabling him reappear in front or behind the opponent. Cloaking Device Devastation Beam (*Cues: Killer Instinct (2013) - Fulgore Theme*) Wiz: And when his foe's time grows short, Fulgore uses one of four overwhelming finishers called "No Mercies". Fulgore proceeded to finish off T.J. Combo by detaching his head from his body as a GIANT turret popped out and began shooting his opponent to death. “I-I, but he-I just-HOW?!” Thorax stuttered. “B-b-b-but…” stuttered out Twilight in similar confusion. Boomstick: (Stammers) I don't even... where was he keeping that?! And how can he even see where he's aiming?! “I HAVE SO MANY QUESTIONS!” yelled the princess of magic. Wiz: Fulgore's strength is staggering, but where does all this power come from? Hidden within his armored chassis is... Boomstick: That giant fucking turret somehow! “Yeah seriously, HOW?!” yelled a frustrated Rainbow Dash. No Mercies Turret Morph - Fulgore changes his head into a turret-like gun and shoots the opponent repeatedly. Laser Site - Fulgore laser blasts the opponent to death. Machine Morph - Fulgore changes into a battle machine and shoots the opponent repeatedly. Terminator - Fulgore sends out a targeting light. Once it locks on, it obliterate the opponent. Wiz: ...a nuclear reactor, which powers everything at his disposal. Fulgore can manually overclock this reactor, increasing its charge multiple times. Boomstick: At max charge he gains a massive power increase, doubling his speed and allowing him to fire a giant laser of doom: the Devastation Beam. Fulgore opened up his chest compartment and unleashed a massive red beam of destruction. “WOAH!” “AWESOME!!” “Ah haven't seen the beam that powerful since the time Twilight fought against Tirek!” Applejack exclaimed. Reactor Power source Charges up through: Activated charge Auto-triple attacks Instinct mode Full charge required for Devastation Beam Full charge increases speed & power (*Cues: Fulgore's Theme - Killer Instinct Teaser*) Boomstick: With something like that, he's gotta be unstoppable. Wiz: Almost, until he met the warrior monk Jago who literally tore him apart. “Dang…” muttered Spike. “There's always a bigger fish in the sea.” said Shining Armor. Wiz: Despite the dismemberment UltraTech still had plans for their mechanical butcher. He was rebuilt stronger, faster, and with a new mission: find and kill his rival Jago, a mission Fulgore never completed. Boomstick: He came so close, but then the little wuss called in his god-slaying sister Orchid and double-teamed him into destruction. “Wait, Orchid beat him?!” Spike chuckled. “What, did she flash him into submission?” “System overload! Boobies too perfect!” Pinkie shouted in an over the top robot voice. “DOES NOT COMPUTE. DOES NOT COMPUTE.” “... sigh, i’m not even mad.” muttered Twilight. Boomstick: Still, Fulgore is a monster, annihilating anyone who gets in his way. Well, nearly anyone. Bitch. Feats & Faults + Defeated T.J. Combo effortlessly + Defeated Orchid + Mind of a former KI Champion - Beaten by Orchid & Jago together - Had yet to defeat Jago - Charging reactor severely opens up defenses Fulgore performs a 40-hit Ultra Combo on Sabrewulf. Announcer: ULTRAAAAA COMBOOOOO! Twilight glanced over to her friends and noticed something. “Spike? Are you crying?” “It's… so beautiful,” Spike said as manly tears ran down his face. Flash sniffled as he wiped his eyes. “Such carnage, such power…” Rainbow added. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ The group was on the fence on this one but they admit Folgore was a literal death machine. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Sektor (*Cues: The Tower - Mortal Kombat 9*) Wiz: Earth was in grave danger. The interdimensional overlord, Shao Kahn, was one victory away from conquering the human world. “Oh, great. THIS jerk again!” Rainbow scoffed upon hearing the name of the death battle victor. Boomstick: In order to stack up with Kahn's invading monsters, the grand master of the Lin Kuei clan of assassins came up with a plan SO crazy, it just might work. Wiz: "Let's turn all of our ninjas into robots!" Everyone went silent for a few seconds, letting that idea sink in. “So… awesome!” Rainbow and Flash whispered with stars in their eyes and barely restrained glee. Boomstick (And, Rainbow, Flash, Pinkie, and Spike): That guy is my fucking hero. (*Cues: Mortal Kombat 9 - The Courtyard Night*) Wiz: Thus, the cyber initiative was created. The screen changed to show the very gruesome procedure of undergoing the surgical experiment, with bloody wires and metal sticking out of their skin. “On second thought, I'd rather NOT go through that.” Flash shivered. “Ditto,” everyone else said as the gruesome images would haunt them tonight. Wiz: The first and only willing member of the Lin Kuei to undergo the mechanization was the grand master's own son, Sektor. Background Height: 1.85 m | 6'1" Weight: 139 kg | 300 lbs Model number LK-9T9 Former member of the Lin Kuei Tekunin Grandmaster Fighting Styles Ninjitsu Sambo Kenpo Boomstick: Who names their kid Sektor? It's like the day his child was born, he like's, "I'm going to give you this cool cyber name, just in case I ever pull off my crazy as shit plan to turn everyone I know into robots." “Got agree on that one, with a name like that you were pretty much torpedoing him into a certain lifestyle…” Starlight stated. “I mean, it's like naming your child Sharpshot and then being surprised when he gets a job as a sniper.” “Pot meet kettle…” muttered Deadman’s voice though no one seemed to hear him. Sektor: I will show no mercy! Wiz: Sektor was already an unrivaled assassin, and master of ninjitsu, sambo and kenpo. Boomstick: As a cyborg, he's all that, plus extra armor and a never ending supply of missiles. Wiz: Why would a ninja, master of the silent kill, use a missile launcher? Thorax tilted his head. “I have to agree, even if it is a cyborg ninja, they're called masters of the silent kill for a reason-” “Thorax, any argument that has the the words “cyborg ninja” in it quickly becomes invalid because of how awesome it is!" Flash stated firmly as they continued to watch. Boomstick: He's also got two flamethrowers on his wrists, a cloaking device, a laser pistol, a teleporting rocket punch, and lightsabers. Wiz: They're actually called pulse blades. Boomstick: They're definitely lightsabers. Sweet royalty-free lightsabers. “Yay! More lightsabers!” cheered Pinkie Pie. Sektor opened up his chest as four missiles hovered next to him and a few were launched at his opponent Mileena… which obliterated her entire torso and sent her arms, chest, and head into the air… and then the remaining four missiles locked onto them and blew them up all at once. The entire group winced at the brutality of such an attack… “Yikes…” muttered Spike. Move Set Chest Missile Double Missile Homing Missile Upward Missile Rocket Punch Flame Burner (A flamethrower) Cloaking Device Laser Pistol Pulse Blades (*Cues: The Subway - Mortal Kombat 9*) Wiz: To close a kill Sektor finishes foes with a brutal fatality, like the Robo-Sek, Missile Strike, or the Compactor. The screen then showed Sektor summoning a HUGE compactor out of his chest and crushing his victim (Sonya Blade) into paste. “...I'm not even going to BEGIN to go into what's wrong with that.” Starlight deadpanned. “But how-” “Thorax, it's a CYBORG NINJA, questions invalid! Enjoy the awesome!” yelled Flash. Boomstick: Okay, how do these robo guys keep all this impossible shit in their chests? Do they have black holes for hearts or something? “That’s what i want to know,” Twilight said as her eye began to twitch. Fatalities Compactor Flamethrower Scarecrow Missile Strike: A single, powerful missile Robo-Sek: Fires five missiles at once Wiz: Regardless of the storage quandary Sektor's compactor can crush a human being in mere seconds. At minimum, crushing an entire human body into paste requires nearly 2 tons of pressure. The new Sektor proved invaluable, aiding Shao Kahn in multiple Mortal Kombat tournaments against the defenders of humanity, and after Kahn discovered a loophole around the tournament's rules, Sektor led the Lin Kuei in the invasion of Earthrealm. Boomstick: But despite the pure badassery of being a robo-ninja, not everybody wanted to do it. Wiz: Fearing the loss of mind and soul, a few Lin Kuei managed to escape. Sektor was tasked with hunting these traitors and dragging them back to the grand master, dead or alive. The list of defectors included a young ninja named Sub-Zero. (*Cues: The Armory - Mortal Kombat 9*) Boomstick: Mecha Sektor was nearly unstoppable. He slaughtered the clan's enemies by the dozens, without batting so much as a robo-eye, but no matter how hard he tried, he could never take down that poster boy Sub-Zero. Wiz: Until Raiden reset the timeline and practically gift-wrapped him. “Why is it that time travel seems to only make things worse in the grand scheme of things?” Starlight sighed in disappointment. Wiz: However, Sektor's transformation was not perfect. While his cybernetics enhanced his body, they had a different effect on his mind. In just a few years, Sektor unraveled, tumbling deeper and deeper into an inescapable well of insanity. Feats & Faults + Defeated Smoke + Defeated Hydro with Cyrax + Assassinated Lin Kuei Grandmaster - Lost Grandmaster title to Sub-Zero - Has yet to defeat Sub-Zero - Mentally insane (*Cues: The Living Forest - Mortal Kombat 9*) Wiz: Mad with power, Sektor murdered his own father, intending to take the title of grand master for himself. The group glared at the screen after hearing that. “Monster,” Twilight hissed out. Boomstick: Until Sub-Zero showed up and totally ninja'd that shit, and then kicked him out of the Lin Kuei for good. Bummer. “Awww~ ya! This Sub-Zero is sounding more like the COOLEST guy out there!” said Rainbow Dash. getting a few glares from her friends. “That pun was bad and you should feel bad…” muttered Starlight. Wiz: Sektor was alone: his only companions the twisted voices in his head. Eventually he managed to found his own clan of cyber warriors, the Tekunin. Sektor now roams the realms, hungry for Mortal Kombat. Boomstick: MORTAL KOMBAAAAT! (Hums theme) Smoke: You actually did it: you're a cyborg! Sektor: We are the Lin Kuei: more stealthful than the night. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ After hearing about Sektor the group where now rooting for Folgore. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Wiz: Alright the combatants are set. Let's end this debate once and for all. Boomstick: *Finishes singing* Death Battle! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Death Battle Sektor runs around an industrial warehouse owned by UltraTech until he crashed into Fulgore, who was using his cloaking device, immediately deactivating it. Sektor then teleports a few steps away from Fulgore. “Well that’s one way to start a battle,” Thorax said. (*Cues: Killer Instinct (2013) - Fulgore Theme*) FIGHT! Fulgore slowly walks towards Sektor, who fires a missile from his chest. Fulgore deflects the missile with his reflector. Fulgore then uses Cyber Dash and Cyber Port to attack Sektor with his plasma claws in a 7-hit combo, knocking Sektor away. (*Brutal combo!*) “Fulgore’s relentless,” Applejack said, taking a bite out of an apple. “C’mon I want to see some awesome robot stuff,” Rainbow said, inching closer to the TV. As Fulgore charges his reactor, Sektor teleports to attack Fulgore, getting in a 5-hit combo. (*Hyper!-*) Sektor then shoots his flamethrowers towards Fulgore, stunning him, then charges at Fulgore with his pulse blades. Fulgore is constantly stunned by Sektor's pulse blades, then manages his timing perfectly, allowing him to break out of Sektor's combo and uppercut him away. (*C-C-C-Combo Breaker!*) “Noooo! My combos!” yelled Pinkie Pie as she had just dropped a her bag of combos at that moment. “He got out of that combo so easily,” Shining said, amazed. Fulgore fires the Plasma Storm three times at Sektor, and continues to charge his reactor. (*Cues: Mortal Kombat - Main Theme (Remix)*) “Fulgore gotta charge his reactor faster,” Twilight said, taking notes on the battle. Sektor then activates Robo-Sek, firing five missiles at Fulgore, but Fulgore sees this and fires his laser eyes at Sektor's missiles. As all of that transpired, Sektor swings from lights on the ceiling, then jumps down and attacks Fulgore until he is paralyzed. Using this opportunity, Sektor unleashes his compactor. “Oh no,” Spike said, fearing the power of the compactor. (*Cues: Mortal Kombat 9 - Battle Plan*) However, Fulgore is able to halt it, holding up the top with his hands, and finishes charging his reactor. “That’s check,” said Starlight with smirk. “He’s so close,” Thorax said desperately. (*Cues: Killer Instinct (2013) - Main Theme*) Now at full charge, Fulgore breaks off Sektor's compactor and then does a 37-hit combo, finishing the fight with the Devastation Beam, which causes Sektor's head, torso, and legs to separate. Fulgore then does his victory pose. As if knowing what was coming, the moment he unleashed his final blast, Rainbow, Pinky, Flash, Spike, and surprisingly Starlight jumped out of their seats and hollered alongside the announcer: (*ULTRAAAAA COMBOOOOO!*) “Woaaaah,” Everyone in the room said at the same time. K.O.! Fulgore transforms using Machine Morph, then fires at Sektor until his body parts explodes. Results (*Cues: Killer Instinct - Fulgore Theme*) Boomstick: Yep, Devastation Beam lives up to its name. “Hell yeah it does,” Rainbow and Spike said at the same time. Wiz: This was a close one. With his ninja abilities, Sektor could easily outmaneuver Fulgore's bulk, but Fulgore had the edge in every other category. He had more options for defensive, close, and long-range combat. Being almost twice as big, his size and strength surmounted Sektor's. And whenever Sektor did get an upper hand, Fulgore simply overclocked his reactor to compensate. “A smart strategy,” Twilight said, writing something down. Boomstick: And while neither of them have successfully defeated their rivals, Sektor has been humiliated by Sub-Zero, over and over; but Fulgore would have won his second duel with Jago if Orchid hadn't stepped in. “So Fulgore could have beaten Jago, huh? Guess that proves He was stronger than Sektor when he couldn’t beat Sub-zero,” Rarity said as she rubbed her chin. Wiz: It took the combined might of two demi-god killers to take Fulgore down. “Well at least Ultratech accomplished what they set out to do with Fulgore,” Flash said, nodding. “Agreed they made a perfect killing machine,” said Shining Armor in agreement. Boomstick: In the end, Sektor got ro-blown up. “I see boomsticks jokes haven't gotten any better…” muttered Thorax. Wiz: The winner is Fulgore. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Boomstick: Next time on Death Battle. At first the group see nothing but soon the silence was crushed when they heard a loud stomping noise. Everypony was completely tense when stoping was getting louder… and closer. Soon they see a colossal monster looking around and before anyone could say anything, it let out a terrifying roar as thunder flashes a few times before the screen fades back to black. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ After the battle, everyone gathered around the glowing box. Pinkie opened the box and began to rummage through it. “Wonder what we’ll get this time,” Spike said outloud. “If it’s anything like the stuff we got before, then it should be pretty cool,” Rainbow said, hovering in the air. Pinkie emerged from the box and said, “ We got shirts.” She then threw shirts at everyone as they grabbed and looked at them. Spike looked at one of the shirts to see Sektor on one side with the words “Mortal Kombat” on the other side. “That’s pretty cool,” Spike said, putting on the shirt. “I have to agree, Spike. These are pretty cool,” Thorax said holding his own shirt of Fulgore use his Devastation Beam with the words “Ultra Combo” below it. “Is there anything else? “ Rainbow asked hopefully. Pinkie dived back into the box as the lids closed. The box moved in a way that it looked like something or someone was fighting a truck inside as screeching was heard. “Um, Pinkie, are you okay in there?” Fluttershy asked, gripping doomguy plushie for safety. The plushie itself holds it’s shotgun in a cute yet threatening manner as it’s theme song played. After about a minute of car screeches and horn blows, Pinkie emerged from the box with a smaller box in her hooves. “Look at what I got,” Pinkie said, waving the box around. “Sweet,” Rainbow said as she tried to grab the smaller box from her party animal of a friend. Pinkie pulled the box out of the way and said, “Sorry Dashie but this has Shining’s name on it.” “Oh c’mon,” Rainbow yelled while pouting like a filly. Pinkie walked towards Shining and gave him the box as he looked at it like a kid at christmas. “Wonder what’s in here?” Shining asked as he opened the box. He then uses his magic to take what was inside out and marvels at the Fulgore helmet replica. “That looks cool, Sir,” Flash said with a smile. Shining noticed that the helmet looked just big enough for a pony’s head. He brought the helmet towards his head and put it on. Once it was on, Shining saw various graphs and numbers appear as he looked at his friends and sister. He even saw various bits of information on how to take them down. “I’m keeping this,” Shining said, taking off the helmet. Twilight pouted and muttered, “I wanted something like that.” “Well we might as well head back. Some of us have work in the morning,” Rainbow said, flying out the window. “She’s right for once. I need to tend to some chores in the morning,” Applejack said, walking out the door with Fluttershy following her. “And I have a party in the morning. Bye bye,” Pinkie said, bouncing out the door as Rarity gracefully followed. “And we need to get back to the Crystal Empire. We need to do this again sometime,” Shining said as he gave Spike and Twilight a hug. Once the heartfelt family moment was done, Shining along with Thorax and Flash left Twilight’s home to return to their own homes. “I should get some sleep. Good night Twilight, Spike,” Starlight said as she walked towards her room. This left Spike and Twilight alone in the viewing room. “Well I’m gonna hit the hay as well,” Spike said as he was floated into the air by a pinkish magical aura. He was turned around to face the stern face of Twilight as she sat there. “We need to talk about going behind other’s backs, Spike,” Twilight said, using her magic to set Spike on the couch. “But you said you weren’t gonna be mad about me inviting the guys,” Spike said, looking a little nervous. “Oh I’m not mad about that anymore. After taking a minute to think about it, you deserve to hang out with the guys every once in awhile,” Twilight said, wave her hoof at that. Spike let out a sigh of relief at that but was still curious on what Twilight meant. “So what did you mean?” Spike asked, shrugging his shoulders. Twilight got a dangerous glint in her eyes and said, “What I mean is that someone found out about Robo-Dash and disassembled it.” “Oh, that’s bad,” Spike said as he began to sweat a bit. “Luckily I had a few cameras that recorded who did it. Now you mind telling me why you did it,” Twilight said, crossing her hooves in front of her. “NNNNnnoooooooooooo,” Spike yelled from his seat. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ CHAPTER END! NEXT TIME GODZILLA VS GAMERA!
Godzilla VS Gamera.“So how long do i have to wear this?” Spike asked while sitting on a stoll. On his head was a white cone hat with the word dunce on the it. “Once you learn not to do anything behind my back no matter if your intentions were justified,” Twilight said in her lecture tone while reading a book to pass the time until the next episode. She wouldn’t have to wait very long as the door slammed open as her friends piled into the viewing room. “Hiya Twilight…. Um, what’s up with Spike?” Pinkie asked, tilting her head a bit. “He’s just finishing his time out,” Twilight said nonchalantly. “OOooooohhhh, Spike’s in trouble,” Pinkie and Rainbow said, covering their mouths while snickering as were the rest of the girls. Before Spike could even say a word a new voice cutted in, “Who’s in trouble?” Surprised, everyone jumped and looked to see their other dragon friend Ember in her classic ninja garb. “How did you,” Twilight began to say slowly. Ember smirked and said, “Ninja.” “That’s not really an answer,” Twilight said, trying to process everything. “Niiiiinnnnnjjjjjaaa,” Ember said slowly as if it was the answer to all of life’s questions. It was silent for a few moments as Twilight opened and closed her mouth a few times. Fluttershy, not liking the awkward silence, grabbed her plushie and asked, “Um, do you mind if i ask why’re you here? Not that we don’t want to see you.” She put Doomguy Plushie in front of her to protect herself from any threats. Ember walked over to Spike and said, “Well I came here to hang out with Spike and possibly watch another episode if it’s okay.” She took the dunce hat off of the younger dragon and rubbed his dorsal fins. “Hey, cut it out,” Spike said while laughing a little. “Ey, we have better things to do than play with your dragonfriend,” a high pitched voice said causing everyone to look around. “Who said that?” Pinkie said, turning her head around like an owl. “Well, that's the other reason why I'm here. You see i got a message from a ‘Deadman’,” Ember said as everyone's eyes grew wide. “What did the note say, darling,” Rarity said, walking towards their friend. “It said that after we see the next episode then my father will be cured,” Ember said, blushing while scratching the back of her head. That caused everyone in the room to grow a bit fearful at that. “Was your father poisoned?” Fluttershy asked desperately. “No, he’s fine. It’s just that,” Ember began to say as she blushed. She didn’t know how to say the problem to her friends. “For Pete’s sake child. Stop beating around the bush and tell them,” the voice said as the front of Ember’s ninja outfit moved. “What was that?” Rainbow asked, getting in position to attack if necessary.. “I’ll just show you,” Ember said as she reached into her suit and pulled a small scaled thing out. The group got closer to see what the young dragon lord was holding. When they got close enough, the group had to stop themselves from gasping in surprise or biting their lips to stop themselves from laughing. There in Ember’s hands was the previous dragon lord, Torch, and he was the size of a hamster. “OH MY DIAMONDS. HE’S SO ADORABLE,” Rarity screamed as she hugged the now tiny elder dragon. “Don’t you mean ‘oh my Celestia’?” Twilight asked. “You worship your thing darling, i’ll worship mine,” Rarity said as she didn’t stop hugging the older dragon, no matter how much he threatened her. “.... So Deadman did this?” Applejack said after witnessing her classy friend hug the tiny dragon. After being near Discord and all the evils they fought, nothing surprises her anymore. “That’s what the note said. It also said something about more guests,” Ember said as she took a seat on the couch. “More guests? But it's just us,” Pinkie said while looking at all of her friends in the room. Suddenly a swirling red and purple portal appeared in the center of the room. Everyone stared as three familiar ponies tumbled out of the portal as a VERY familiar voice said, “Stay in the time out room and think about what you’ve done.” As the three ponies groaned, Applejack and Rainbow looked at their pink friend and said, “You had to say something, didn't you?” “Sorry,” Pinkie said bashfully. Another groan drew their attention to the ponies on the floor as one said, “Why did you have to annoy that guy Sonata? That dumbass could have sent us to another dimension.” “I just wanted to watch another episode, Dagi,” the taco lover said as she got up and looked around. “And we're here. Hi girls and dragons,” Sonata said while waving. “Dragons?” Adagio and Aria asked, looking around the room to see the blue dragon princess next to Spike. “Um, hi,” Ember said shyly as she waved. “So is she a new assistant or friend?” Adagio said as she looked at Twilight for the answer. “She’s a friend. Ember meet Adagio, Aria and Sonata. Girls, this is Dragon Lord Ember,” Twilight said, introducing everyone to each other. “Dragon Lord? So what happened to Little Match Stick?” Aria said smirking. “Little Match Stick?” Twilight and her friends asked. “For the love of the everything holy MY NAME ISN’T MATCHSTICK!” Torch screamed from the confines Rarity’s hooves. The former sirens looked at the former dragon lord in surprise before breaking down in hysterical laughter. “That’s Little Match Stick!?” Adagio laughed with tears running down her face. “What happen to you!?” Wheezed out Aria having a hard time breathing with how much she was laughing. “You’re just as adorable as I remember,” Sonata said as she plucked Tiny Torch from Rarity’s hooves and hugged him. “Let go of me you blue haired nitwit,” Torch screamed while try to claw at Sonata’s hooves. It proved to be useless as his clawing was the equivalent of a kitten batting a piece of string. “I thought I was free from you three all those years ago.” “Yep that’s definitely our Matchstick,” Aria said, wiping away a few tears in a rare display of emotion. “You haven’t change since we last saw you,” Adagio said with mirth. “You girls knew Torch?” Twilight asking in shock. She even got in front of them as Sonata continued to cuddle the tiny ex-dragon lord. “Ya~ little matchstick use to date Aria way back,” laughed Adagio much the shock to Ember and the main group. “It feels like it was yesterday that Little Match Stick and Aria were trying to one up each other.” “W-w-w-wha?” stuttered out Ember, trying to process what she just heard. “Father use to date a pony?” “Actually we were sirens back then,” Aria said nonchalantly. “And those were some good times,” she said with a far away look. “Okay?” Ember said confused out of her mind. “Stop hugging me and start this battle thing. The sooner it ends the better,” Torch said as Sonata started to nuzzle him. “Fine, ruin our fun,” Adagio muttered. “Twilight, can you start the episode?” she said while taking a seat on the couch with her sisters. Twilight just shrugged and pressed play on the remote. Interlude (*Cues: Invader - Jim Johnston*) Wiz: Kaiju: the Japanese word for - Boomstick: A giant monster that destroys everything around it, like Godzilla, the King of the Monsters. “K-king of Monster?” squeaked out Fluttershy as she hid behind her doomguy plushy which seemed to have a gleam in it’s visore after the first combatant was announced. “Now that’s a badass title!” Rainbow proclaimed. Wiz: And Gamera, the Guardian of the Universe. Despite being box office rivals for half a century, these two enormous creatures have never met... until today. “So it’s another battle between two characters that the fan base consider rivals?” asked Starlight. “It seems so, now i’m wondering if we are going to see anymore of this- Pinkie Pie what are you doing?” asked Twilight as she noticed her pink friend in the back pointing her party cannon at a dart board with a drawing of what looked like a human wearing a very odd red and black outfit. “Oh just getting ready for a Very special guest,” answered the Party Pony a she set her cannon aside and went back to sit with her friends. Giving her… acentric friend an odd look, Applejack asked. “And who’s that sugarcube?” “Oh~ just someone that EVERYONE can’t wait to see!” giggled Pinkie Pie in pure glee much to the confusion to the rest of the group. “What a freak,” muttered Aria. Boomstick: He's Wiz and I'm Boomstick. Wiz: And it's our job to analyze their weapons, armor, and skills to find out who would win... a Death Battle. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Godzilla (*Cues: Godzilla Appears in Hokkaido - Godzilla VS. King Ghidorah*) Wiz: The year was 1954, less than a decade after Little Boy and Fatman had decimated Japan. Boomstick: The nuclear age had begun. Almost everyone was shocked at the display of the destructiveness of the bomb. Fearing the answer, Fluttershy looked at Twilight and asked, “Do all the humans have that?” With a shake of her head, Twilight said, “Not anymore. That bomb was only used several decades ago and hasn't been used since.” Wiz: As the United States tested their shiny new hydrogen bombs across the Pacific, one of them woke something up. (*Cues: Godzilla Theme - GMK*)(*Godzilla roars*) Boomstick: Godzilla, the radioactive rampaging savior/destroyer of Japan. “...Daddy?” Sonata asked while tilting her head cutely. “Is he a savior or destroyer? Is it possible to be both?” asked Ember. “it depends on morality,” answered Torch. Wiz: Mutated by nuclear energy, Godzilla stands over 300 feet tall and weighs 90 thousand tons. He is an unstoppable force of nature. “That’s big,” “That’s not just big. It's bigger than the largest known dragon in our land,” “Little Ember is right. He’s even bigger than me,” Torch admitted with some resentment in his voice. Boomstick: And for some reason, Godzilla has made Japan his personal playground and has been stomping through it for 60 years. Man: Couldn't he have picked on some other country? Boardroom: *laughs* Everyone was terrified by that fact alone. To be terrorized by that walking behemoth for decades would be scary for any of them. (*Cues: Requiem - Godzilla vs Destoroyah*) Wiz: Godzilla's radioactive mutation leaves everything in his wake contaminated: water, plants, even people. Godzilla's presence alone turns a city block completely uninhabitable. Boomstick: Like that noisy upstairs neighbor or people who let their dog shit in your front lawn. “That sounds horrible,” Fluttershy said as she hugged Doomguy Plushie to her chest. “To never being near someone without harming them,” Pinkie quietly said as her hair began to straighten. “Causing nothing but pain just by existing,” (*Cues: Mothra vs Gigan - Godzilla Final Wars*) Wiz: But Godzilla does not simply walk past his enemies to destroy them. Boomstick: His strength is insane. He once lifted and threw his arch-rival Keizer Ghidorah, who weighs 100 thousand freakin' tons. Wiz: He channels this strength through his claws, teeth, tail - Boomstick: AND EPIC GRAVITY-DEFYING DROPKICKS! The screen changed to reveal Godzilla running forward… and suddenly started sliding across the terrain on the tip of his tail! Completely defying gravity as he drop kicked his opponent. “WHAT? That's physically impossible,” shouted Twilight and Starlight. “Who cares? Epic drop kicks for the win,” countered Rainbow with Sonata and Pinkie Pie nodding in agreement. Background Height: 108 m / 355 ft Weight: 81,600,000 kg / 90,000 tons Japanese name: Gojira Age: Over 65 million years Feeds on nuclear radiation Nuclear powered heart Accidentally mutated by nukes Somehow has knowledge in judo & boxing (*Cues: Godzilla vs Kumonga/Kamacuras - Godzilla Final Wars*) Wiz: Hilarious abilities aside, Godzilla would not be such a legendary kaiju without some serious firepower. He can emit atomic energy from his body for a short-range nuclear pulse. “That could be handy in certain situations,” Applejack said, whistling after seeing the powerful shockwave. “And with his big size, he could probably hit a bunch of monsters all at once,” added in Starlight. Adagio stated before smirking deviously. “Or rather, a bunch of US at once…” “Adagio, NO.” Twilight groaned. Boomstick: Or fire his signature atomic breath, a goddamn laser beam of pure radiation! That's like microwaving at least a hundred balls of tinfoil! Wiz: Well, give or take a few... million... Godzilla fires the Atomic Breath directly to the army from Godzilla, Mothra and King Ghidorah: Giant Monsters All-Out Attack (2001). “SO COOL!” everyone cheered minus Fluttershy who was hiding behind her Doomguy plushy and Torch who was glaring at the screen. “Not impressed! I can do that too!” yelled the former Dragon lord. (*Cues: Godzilla! - Godzilla (2014)*) Boomstick: The atomic breath can melt, burn, or blow up just much anything, and you know it just can't smell good! I mean... that's a lot of fish! (*Cues: Bio-Wars - Godzilla*) Wiz: NO! No, no, no! That right there is Zilla, the bastardized and shamed American version that Toho literally bought the rights and completely re-branded... just to murder on-screen. Boomstick: *chuckles* Take that, America! “Well at least it spawned a decent TV show…” Pinkie mused. Wiz: And that was just the real Godzilla's standard atomic breath. Boomstick: Yep. After absorbing a giant pterodactyl's soul... oookay… Spike blinked. “I'd ask how, but I think that'd raise even more questions…” (*Cues: 1996 Godzilla - Attacks Osaka*) Boomstick: he gained the power to boost his breath to the red spiral ray... Wiz: ...an attack so deadly it only took a few blasts to obliterate the more powerful clone of himself, Space Godzilla. Boomstick(Pinkie, Spike and Sonata): What, Space Godzilla?! Wiz: Yes, Space Godzilla is a thing, moving on... Boomstick: Ohh… “What a ripoff,” grumbled Aria and Rainbow Dash. “Aww… I wanted to know more about Space Godzilla!” Sonata whined. Wiz: Godzilla's cell structure can quickly regenerate from all manner of wounds, and despite being vulnerable to man-made electricity, he possesses magnetic properties. Like a lightning rod, he can attract thunderbolts from the sky and use nature's power to enhance his own abilities... or turn himself into a giant living magnet. Boomstick: Magnets... how do they even work? Well believe it or not, that isn't the weirdest thing that Godzilla can do. If Big G needs to get somewhere quick, he bends over, charges up, and does this... (*Cues: Godzilla Goes Flying - M37T2*) Godzilla uses his atomic breath to propel himself through the air, and it's a lot sillier than it sounds and Godzilla Goes Flying Plays. Events based from Godzilla vs The Smog Monster (1971). Wiz: Well... at least Japan is... creative? Boomstick: Wait, can that even happen? “I… I don't even…” stuttered out Twilight as her brain shorted out from that silly scene. Wiz: Scaling to the present, to actually lift his body means his atomic breath must have a force of over 328 trillion psi. (*Cues: A Sign of Godzilla - Godzilla VS King Ghidorah*) Wiz:That's the equivalent of 1 TRILLION riot control fire hoses, enough to wrap around the earth 38 THOUSAND times. Boomstick: Damn! Abilities Atomic Breath Spiral Atomic Breath Nuclear Pulse Regenerator G1 Magnetic powers Sharp dorsal plates Uncanny durability Godly strength Can breathe underwater (*Cues: Godzilla's Theme - Godzilla Unleashed*) Boomstick: Godzilla has 44 known victories, largely due to his insane durability. He's fallen into a volcano, survived a black hole, and tanked a meteorite point-blank... without a scratch. “Quite an impressive feat…” Torch said in a genuine tone. “So cool,” whispered Ember with a blush. Strengths & Feats 44 wins, 9 losses (if King Kong counts), 7 ties Survived & escaped a black hole Regenerated from a beating heart Battled Rodan for over 12 hours Survived the Absolute Zero Cannon Lifted & threw Kaizer Ghidorah Matched Thor's strength Defeated 10 monsters in a row in Final Wars Wiz: But despite popular belief, Godzilla is not invincible. His regeneration takes time, his speed is lacking, and despite having two brains, one in his skull and the other where his tail meets his torso, he's pretty darn clumsy. Boomstick: Where were you on that one, Assbrain? The more immature of the group let out a few snickers at that one. Wiz: He officially lost a fight against King Kong and he's even died in four separate films. Weaknesses Sensitive to light Relatively slow Somewhat clumsy due to size Lost to King Kong & Mothra Gills are a weak spot Vulnerable to strong surges of unnatural electricity Killed by Oxygen Destroyer & MechaGodzilla 2 The screen changed to show various version of Godzilla dying: The original Godzilla being reduced to a skeleton from the Oxygen destroyer. The Heisei Godzilla being killed by MechaGodzilla 2, as well as dying from a radiation overdose/meltdown in a different film. And GMK Godzilla being reduced to nothing but a beating heart. “Yeeesh, he’s died that many times!?” gasped out Adagio. Boomstick: But Godzilla's victories definitely outweigh his failures. There's a good reason they call him the "King of the Monsters". (*Godzilla roars*) Just as the clip finished playing Ember immediately spread her wings and let out an aggressive roar of her own, the moment she stopped she realized everyone was staring at her. “What was THAT all about?” Starlight asked. “Did you just let out a... mating call?” Spike asked, blushing a little. “Oh that's hilarious!” Rainbow laughed as she fell to the floor holding her sides. “She's got it worse for him than I do for Sonic!” She continued to laugh until she realized what she'd just said. She sighed as she pulled out her book and started removing two strikes from each of her friends. “You're erasing them?” asked Applejack in surprise. “I walked into that one myself. I'm nothing if not fair.” She replied. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ After the analysis, the Dazzlings and dragons decided that Godzilla would be the one they root for. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Gamera Wiz: The year was 1965, the apex of the Space Race. Technology was advancing further and faster than ever before, but no one could've anticipated the bio-engineered marvel hidden beneath the waves. (*Cues: Gamera Guardian of the Universe - An Investigation Ship*) Wiz: Eons ago, the ancient people of Atlantis learned how to construct life and foolishly decided to play God. “Of course,” Starlight sighed. “When will people learn,” said Adagio while shaking her head. Boomstick: But instead of creating something safe like a dog or a bunny, they created giant flying laser-shooting murder birds. “.... why!?” cried out everyone. (*Cues: Gamera Guardian of the Universe - Gyaos Flies Over*) Boomstick: Surprise, surprise - they couldn't be controlled, and they turned 100% of Atlantis into ocean front property. “And once again trying to play God results in everyone getting killed.” muttered Torch. Wiz: So what was their solution to counter these giant destructive monsters? Why, ANOTHER giant destructive monster, of course! Everyone facepalmed at that. (*Cues: Gamera Guardain of the Universe - Gamera Appears; Gamera roars*) Wiz: Enter Gamera, Guardian of the Universe and Friend to All Children. Kid 1: Hurry, let's go! Kid 2: He won't harm us. Gamera doesn't hurt people. He likes us. Background Height: 80 meters / 262.5 ft Weight: 9,000,000 kg / 10,000 tons Origin: Atlantean bio-engineering Age: Up to 150 million years Feeds on fire, plasma, & mana More intelligent than most humans A skilled gymnast Known as the Guardian of the Universe & Friend to All Children Boomstick: "Friend to All Children"? That's a terrible title. How about "Gamera, the flying fire-breathing ninja turtle of doom"? Wiz: That's... actually not far off. For a 260-foot, 10-thousand ton turtle, Gamera is quite agile. Gamera spins around on a horizontal bar before flipping through the air and landing on his feet. “That’s … pretty agile for a giant Turtle,” Starlight said, amazed by Gamera. “That is one of the coolest turtles out there,” Rainbow said, pumping her hooves in the air. Boomstick: And he sticks it! Most of the group applauded, impressed with his skill while Rainbow, Pinkie, and Sonata held up scoring cards, it was a perfect 10. “Quit marvelous,” applauded Rarity as she clapped her hooves together. (*Cues: Offense & Defense - Gamera 3*) Boomstick: His arsenal includes two huge tusks, twin elbow spikes, and a fire breath so strong it can be used underwater, despite being... you know... fire! “It looks more like highly-concentrated plasma to me?” said Twilight. “cough-NERD-cough!” said Rainbow Dash while pretending to cough. Wiz: Technically, it's highly-concentrated plasma(Twilight: See!), the fourth state of matter. The hottest plasma ever created by man exceeded 3.6 million degrees Fahrenheit. That's hotter than the surface of the sun. Gamera's fireballs can burn through practically anything. Boomstick: And when he's not spitting hot fire, he fucking eats it! Wiz: It's true. A fiery four-course meal can quickly heal and re-energize him. “So he’s a dragon's worst enemy,” snarked Adagio getting a death glare from the three drgons in the room. Boomstick: Naturally, as a giant turtle monster, he can retract his limbs and head into his shell for extra defense... (spews out jet fire out of the shell) and then fire rocket jets out of the holes and freakin' fly?! WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS?! And why can't my turtle do that? Some day, Mr. Snappy. Some day… “Beat ya to it, Boomstick,” Rainbow said grinning. She already got her turtle Tank to fly with a propeller on it’s back. (*Cues: Offense & Defense - Gamera 3*) Wiz: Gamera can fly at speeds reaching Mach 3, over 22 hundred miles per hour. That's faster than the world record-holding SR71 blackbird. “Whooo boy that's a fast turtle!” said Applejack impressed. (*Cues: Gamera 2 - Demolition Plans*) Boomstick: But how the hell does he know where he's going, and more importantly, how does he not puke his guts out? “Maybe he’s psychic?” Spike asked while shrugging. “Doubtful. It’s more likely he can sense heat or even sense objects,” Twilight said. Wiz: The Atlanteans built Gamera using mana, an ethereal energy force connecting all things, places, and people. Everything has a finite pool of mana, which can be measured using a... Sega Dreamcast. Boomstick: *sighs* But it still can't play DVD's. Wiz: A person's mana is dependent on how much influence and authority they possess over others. As Gamera literally holds the world's fate in his claws, his mana levels are off the charts. “I wonder what Twi’s and the other princess mana levels are,” wondered Pinkie Pie. (*Cues: Gamera 2 - Appearance of Soutai*) Boomstick: Gamera can manipulate his mana in combat, which is useful when you've lost your arm and need to give your enemy a kaiju-sized falcon punch. Gamera uses the Vanishing Plasma Fist to defeat Irys. Boomstick/Rainbow Dash: Fuck yeah! Wiz: And if Gamera ever runs low on mana, he can summon more from the earth itself. Gamera uses the Ultimate Plasma Mana Cannon to defeat Legion. Boomstick: ...I think he got him. “No duh,” Pinkie said. “It’s kinda hard to miss with that,” Aria said, trying to get Sonata away from her. Abilities Fire Breath Plasma Fireballs Accelerated healing Mana manipulation Flight Top speed: Mach 3 Vanishing Plasma Fist Ultimate Plasma Mana Cannon (*Cues: Gamera Guardian of the Universe - Gamera in Danger at Mt. Fuji*) Boomstick: Gamera is fast enough to catch a missile going Mach 10, capable of flying through outer space, and tough enough to survive a nuclear explosion which leveled the entire city of Sendai. Wiz: As Sendai is about 152 miles across, this explosion must have yielded nearly 112 megatons of force. “Hey didn't Sunset say that thing she had-mmhp!” Sonata was saying before her mouth was covered by Aria who was giving her a glare that said she better shut up. “Ignore her, she says stupid stuff sometimes we think she eats way too much crayons and glue when we're not looking,” said Adagio getting a pout from sonata. “Ok this is getting way too personal,” muttered the blue siren. Boomstick: Gamera has a fierce will to fight. No matter how much pain he's in, he'll keep pushing forward for the win. “Like a champ!” yelled Rainbow Dash with a grin. Wiz: And he's not just determined; he's actually quite brilliant. He tactically seeks to exploit enemy weaknesses and is apparently smart enough to repair an alien spacecraft. “Huh?” said Sonata and Pinkie Pie. Boomstick/Twilight: He does machines. “OH!” they said in understanding, Strengths & Feats 16 wins, 3 losses, 2 ties Famous steadfast determination Plasma fire trumps the Tsar Bomb Can jump hundreds of feet high Survived a city-leveling explosion Blew up a Star Destroyer [No joke] Survived an orbital re-entry with crash landing Repaired an alien spacecraft... wtf? Wiz: But despite his intelligence, he is not infallible. Gamera's supposedly impenetrable defenses have been pierced before. And remember, Gamera is explicitly the Guardian of Earth, which does not necessarily include humanity. In fact, Gamera fears mankind may one day become the earth's greatest enemy. “That’s dark,” Applejack said. “But very true,” Twilight and the Dazzlings said. “They have many dangerous weapons that could destroy themselves with.” Weaknesses Underside of the shell is weaker than its top Relies on human connection to maintain power Prefers a winning through retreating strategy Puts the Earth's safety above his own Vulnerable to his own plasma Boomstick: I knew he sounded too good to be true. He's a hippie turtle... Wiz: And yet Gamera has a strange fondness for children. Boomstick: Umm... “Don’t you dare!” yelled Rarity already knowing boomstick was going to do something to raise her blood pressure even more. (*Cues: Gamera - 1969 Theme (Instrumental)*) Boomstick (singing): Gamera! Gamera! He will bring kids to his van! Touch them like no other can! Please don't tell on Gamera! Boomstick: (speaking) No, really… Rarity slammed her head against the wall in irritation while the Dazzlings burst out laughing. Wiz: Actually... he's sacrificed his life to save children on multiple occasions. Even used his ultimate self-destruct move all for the safety of innocent children. Boomstick: Oh. That's pretty cool. “That’s not just cool. That’s a hero right there,” Rainbow said with a few nods from her friends. (*Gamera roars*) ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ With the episode paused, everyone was thinking of who to vote for. Godzilla was a powerful beast with many victories under his belt but Gamera was a smart and strategic being who fights with his head. In the end the ponies decided to root for Gamera as the dragons and Dazzlings supported Godzilla. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Wiz: Alright, the combatants are set. Let's end this debate once and for all. Boomstick: It's time for a Death Battle! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Death Battle (*Cues: GMK - The God of Destruction Appears*) Nearby a large city, Godzilla emerges from the water and roars. Tanks quickly mobilize and as Godzilla approaches the city, fire upon him. Godzilla then stomps on the ground, taking them out instantly, and proceeds to destroy a building and knock away a missile. He roars again when Gamera flies past him, then lands on the ground. The two trade roars. “SUPER GIANT MONSTER FIGHT!! YEAH!!!!” Pinkie, Rainbow and Sonata yelled as Ember said the same thing but softer. FIGHT! (*Cues: Gamera Guardian of the Universe - Air Battle*) Godzilla begins to approach Gamera, who picks up and throws a small building at him. Godzilla is unfazed and continues as Gamera unleashes his fire breath. Afterward, he proceeds to swing both of his hands at Godzilla and strikes him with his head. Godzilla then grabs onto Gamera and slams him into a building twice, the first push damaging it and the second knocking it over. Godzilla then grapple and tosses Gamera over him, knocking him into another small building on his stomach. Godzilla backs up and fires his atomic breath upon Gamera, then fires upon more of the city, turning it into a flaming wreck. “That poor city,” Fluttershy said. “I doubt they have anything to fix that up anytime soon,” Applejack said while shaking her head. (*Cues: Gamera vs Gyaos - Gamera Guardian of the Universe*) The fire then dissipates, as Gamera absorbs it. He fires off three fireballs, all of which strike Godzilla. Godzilla then strikes the ground with his tail twice, then proceeds to do his jump kick, with his tail dragging across the ground. Gamera backs up to no avail as Godzilla lands it and then lands on him, slamming his back into the ground. Godzilla roars and then prepares to stomp when Gamera retracts his head into his shell. Godzilla strikes the ground with his foot, then turns his head in confusion at what happened. He backs up when Gamera's shell begins spinning and then flies into the air. Godzilla roars, then is struck from behind by the spinning shell. “Yeah. Hit and run tactics,” Rainbow said, punching the air. “Keep it up Gamera.” “Don’t let that walking…. Flying soup bowl beat you, Godzilla,” Torch yelled from Ember’s arms. Rain begins to pour and thunder strikes as Godzilla roars once again and fires his beam multiple times at his flying opponent to no avail. Gamera flies toward Godzilla, who catches him, then flies backward out of his grip. He flies toward Godzilla again, who once again catches him, but this time fires jets from his back holes and grips Godzilla with his hands. Godzilla is lifted off of the ground, grabbing onto the shell, as the two begin flying into the air. The two roar, then Godzilla begins firing atomic breath multiple times to no avail. The two eventually reach space, with Godzilla floating helplessly as Gamera circles around him. He grabs onto Godzilla's sides from his back and then flies downward towards Earth. The two breach the atmosphere and are back in the rainy skies. Godzilla's back spikes begin attracting lightning and he uses that power to create a nuclear pulse, knocking Gamera off of him. Gamera falls towards the water below, slowing his fall drastically by spinning in his shell, before going into the water. Godzilla then uses his atomic breath to slow down his fall before crashing into the water. “C’mon. You can do this,” Ember said as she hugged her tiny father. “Too tight!” Torch squicked out. (*Cues: Baragon's Theme - Godzilla Unleashed*) Both emerge from the water roaring, then grab each other by their hands. Gamera strikes Godzilla with his head, but Godzilla responds by biting Gamera's left hand. He tears it off with little effort, with Gamera reeling backward in pain, as Godzilla spits it out. Gamera then absorbs the planet's mana as Godzilla prepares to fire his atomic breath. Gamera then opens his chest to fire his ultimate plasma mana cannon, which hits Godzilla before he can use his own blast. The blast is so devastating that it goes through a bridge, destroying the whole thing. Godzilla then roars as he is enveloped in it. “Yeah, Gamera. Show that lizard who’s boss,” Rainbow cheered as Pinkie waved around some pompoms. “He’s using the planet’s mana so he should win,” Twilight said, trying to calculate Godzilla’s chance of survival. Gamera then stands in the water, his green blood pouring out of the socket, where his left arm once was. He overlooks the destroyed bridge and roars. “Godzilla no…” whimpered Ember while Spike and Sonata gave her a small pat to her shoulders. “He did it,” Fluttershy said, hugging Doomguy Plushie. (*Cues: Gamera vs Gyaos - Gamera Guardian of the Universe*) However, Godzilla emerges from the water behind him only much bigger, “By the old Dragons,” muttered Torch now fully intimidated by the King of Monsters. “Uh-oh,” the poies said when they saw his immense size. bleeding after surviving the attack. He roars as lightning strikes again, Gamera looks back, then Godzilla grabs onto Gamera. Gamera retreats into his shell and tries to use his Fireball Ejection Suicide as one last attempt to kill Godzilla, but Godzilla throws him straight into the air over him. His spikes then turn red as he fires his red spiral ray, which strikes Gamera's shell's back. The beam eventually pierces the shell and Gamera is then obliterated, with a few pieces of his shell scattering into the water below, Godzilla roars. KO! Godzilla roars as whatever is left of Gamera is now deep in the water and out of sight. “There goes Tokyo, go-go Godzilla!” Pinkie and Spike sang. “NOOO GAMERA!” cried Rainbow Dash. Results (*Cues: Godzilla! - Godzilla (2014)*) Boomstick: Add "Master of the Culinary Arts" to his title, 'cuz Godzilla just made turtle soup! “FUCK YOU BOOMSTICK!!” Rainbow fumed. Wiz: Gamera may have held the speed advantage, but Godzilla's sheer size and power won this bout. “No kidding,” Sonata and Spike said, as Sonata hugged Spike. “Godzilla is a beast, there’s no doubt about that,” Adagio said huskily as she wanted to see more of him. Boomstick: He's nine times heavier! Plus, while Gamera tanked a city-busting nuke and almost died, Godzilla tanked a similar explosion from a meteorite and didn't even flinch. Wiz: Gamera's shell was once pierced by Viras, a physically weaker foe. There's no doubt Godzilla could overpower this giant turtle. “When he puts it that way,” Rarity began to say. “Gamera was bound to lose,” Rainbow said hollowly. Boomstick: Hell, he's strong enough to match goddamn Thor, and since Godzilla's atomic breath is composed of pure radiation, not fire, Gamera could not feed off of it. Wiz: But most importantly, Gamera has a history of winning through retreating. He usually takes one round to analyze his foe and another to win the day. On paper, this sounds like a smart idea. “Which it is!” Twilight quickly agreed. Boomstick: But unfortunately for Gamera, Godzilla don't play like that. Looks like Godzilla put Gamera through living... "shell". “Uge…” muttered Torch. Wiz: The winner is Godzilla. The dragons of the group all gave a victory roar. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Boomstick: Next time on Death Battle. we soon hear heroic theme music as we are shown a man wearing a blue and white attire with a shield and he has a patriotic feel to him. However his opponent instantly surprises everyone as they saw a shadowy figure with two pointy ears and with the symbol of a bat on his chest. then large words of who it is appeared on screen. THE KNIGHT RETURNS “…… AWESOME!” cheered the main group who knew all too well who one of the fighters will be for the next fight. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ With that said and done, the ponies pouted as the dragons and former sirens cheered. “That’s why you don’t mess with a king of monsters. That over sized turtle didn’t even stand a chance,” Torch said from his daughter’s arms. “Of course, Little Match Stick. Gamera was weaker and smaller than him. Hell, I believe you could off beaten that turtle,” Aria said causing Torch to puff up his chest a bit. “Gamera should have won. He could fly,” Rainbow said, pouting with her arms crossed. “He just wasn’t powerful enough, Rainbow and flying isn’t everything,” Adagio said with a smirk. Rainbow just flew with her friends to the usual place they go after every episode. “Enough talk. We need to get our stuff,” Sonata said, walking towards the glowing box. “What stuff did that nitwit mean?” Torch asked while looking at Ember. “This box that they’re crowding around gives us some stuff. It’s how I got this ninja outfit and book,” Ember said, pointing to her outfit. “The things that we get seem to fit the theme of the episode so I’m interested to see what we get.” “This might be a bit worthwhile then,” Torch said to himself as Ember walked towards the box and stopped in front of it. Once the glowing stopped, Twilight used her magic to open the box and look inside of it. “So what did we get? Tell us.” Pinkie and Sonata said at the same time. They were literally shaking in excitement. “Just some shirts, comics and some action figures,” Twilight said, giving everyone a few things. “This is pretty cool,” Rainbow said, already reading a Gamera comic. “I think Applebloom might like these if she wants to play with something besides her pokemon,” Applejack said with Rarity agreeing. They put the godzilla figure away for the moment as Pinkie was already playing with hers. “Well with these slim pickings, I wonder when that ball of hot air will get us,” Aria said, as she stood their with her stuff on the ground. Suddenly a portal opens up in the middle of the room and what came out was Deadman riding what appeared to be a cross between Spyro and a night fury. (There you got your cameo!!!!) “Hiyaaa! Steed hiyaaa!” yelled Deadman as he cracked a whip onto the creature. “THIS ISN’T WHAT I MEANT BY A CAMEO,” the creature said in a loud voice. “Hush steed! Daddys talking,” said Deadman yanking the reins to silence the poor cameo star. “Yes sir,” the creature said with it’s head down. It stayed still as Deadman got off of it. “Hey, you. The fireball. Are you the one who did this to me? Then change me back,” Torched said, flapping his wings and getting in the god’s face. “If it wouldn’t be too much trouble,” Embe said quickly. “Hmmmm fine.” Deadman said as he grabbed the former dragon lord with his gloved hands, chanted a few words and then threw Torch out the window where he landed in the middle of ponyville much to the shock of the group. “Father!” Ember yelled, flying towards the window and looking out of it. The other ponies look at the chaos good in shock of his actions. “Why?” Starlight asked hollowly. “Yeah, why would you do it?” Pinkie said with a small cry. “What? Did you want him to grow to full size in your castle?” asked the chaos god. “Well when you put it that way-Wait what? He’s gonna grow in the middle of town,” Twilight said panicking. “Are you crazy?” “Have you met me?” Deadman asked the friendship princess. “He’s got you there,” Starlight said, getting a glare in return. “Maybe it won’t be so bad,” Fluttershy muttered as everyone grew a bit concerned. Suddenly there was a flash of light and everyone looked outside when they saw Ex-Dragon Lord Torch at his regular size, which towered most of the buildings. He then leaned his head back and let loose a loud roar as he stomped on the ground. “RUN IT'S GODZILLA!!!” screamed a panicking earth pony wearing a suit while pointing at Torch. A unicorn wearing the same suit and a pair of glasses also pointed up and said. “It looks like Godzilla , but due to Interdimensional Copyright Laws it's not.” explained the unicorn. “STILL WE SHOULD RUN LIKE IT IS GODZILLA!” screamed the earth pony. “Though it isn't.” the unicorn quickly added in, giving the readers a cheeky grin right before the two screamed and ran off. “Oh my Diamonds. We need to do something,” Rarity sad, feeling helpless at the fact she can’t do anything. “Don’t worry girls. I’m sure Deadman will ….. Where’s Deadman?” Twilight asked as she could any sign of the god or even the sirens for that matter. (MEANWHILE with deadman and the sirens.) “We’re taking this baby to interdimensional Vegas! WHOOOOO!!!” cheered Deadman along with the sirens as they rode the poor Cameo through another Portal. (Back with Twilight and the others.) “.... sigh I’ll go get the riot gear,” muttered Twilight as she prepared to go calm the ponies of ponyville… again. Fuck being a princess sometimes. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ CHAPTER END NEXT BATMAN VS CAPTAIN AMERICA!
Batman VS Captain AmericaIt was a new day, what with the ponies and dragon sitting in the room. They waited patiently for Twilight to start the episode as they tried to hold back their excitement but who could blame them. They were about to see the dark knight fight in another death battle. “Alright girls. Are you ready for the next episode?” Twilight asked her friends. “You bet, Twilight,” Rainbow said with glee. “I want to see if batman can win this time.” “We’ll have to see who his opponent is. He looks like more of a defensive fella,” Applejack said, taking a bite out of an apple. “Well what’re we waiting for? Let’s start it,” Pinkie said as the others nodded their heads in agreement. Twilight was just about to start when a knock came from the front door. She looked at all her her friends and did a mental headcount. It turned out that all her friends were there. “Did any of you invite anypony?” Twilight asked, getting shakes of the head as an answer. “I'll be right back,” she said, walking towards the door and opened it. She was surprised to see her older brother, Shining Armor, and her fellow princess, Luna, at the door with saddlebags. “Hey Twily,” Shining said, shocking the purple alicorn. “Shining? Luna? What're you two doing here?” Twilight asked as she gave Shining a hug. Once she let go of her brother, Twilight then let the two inside. “We came to see another of these Death Battles, young Twilight. We were interested in this Dark Knight character,” Luna said in an authorized tone. “Wait, how did you know about the episode Luna. We didn’t tell anypony about it,” Twilight said, sounding confused. “We saw you and your friend’s dreams from the previous night. When peering into the dreams, i saw memories and grew interested with this coming battle,” Luna said dramatically. “Makes sense,” Twilight said, turning to her brother. Behind her back, Luna let out a sigh since she was able to tell a little white lie. “What about you, Shining?” Twilight asked her brother. “I was just delivering a few files to Celestia. I got there a bit too early and decided to swing by. It was just pure luck that Luna saw me and suggested we travel together,” Shining said as they entered the viewing room. “Hey girls and Spike.” “Hey Shining,” the girls and Spike said at the same time. “Greetings,” Luna said loudly. “Hey Princess Luna,” everyone said to the lunar princess. Twilight sat down as her guests took their own seats. Looking around, Twilight asked, “Now are you all ready for this episode?” Everyone nodded as Twilight pressed play, starting the episode. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Interlude (*Cues: Invader - Jim Johnston*) Wiz: Defending the weak from powerful agents of evil demands a champion who has achieved the peak of human capability, All in the name of Justice... and sometimes Vengeance. “Hmmm i wonder if i should go back to practicing my karate?” wondered Rainbow Dash. Feeling that she was getting rusty and that it could come in handy if she and her friends got into another scuffle with some bad guys. Boomstick: Batman, The Dark Knight. “WOOO!” cheered the main group much to Shining’s amusement, and no one notice Luna sporting a small blush as she stared at the caped crusader. Wiz: And Captain America, The Sentinel of Liberty. Shining Armor had a small smile when he saw the american hero, “I’m gonna like this guy.” Boomstick: He's Wiz and I'm Boomstick. Wiz: And it's our job to analyze their weapons, armor, and skills to find out who would win... a Death Battle. Batman (*Cues: Batman Begins - Molossus*) Wiz: Throughout the underworld of Gotham City, one name strikes fear in the cold, black hearts of even the most hardened Criminals. The Batman. Boomstick: But becoming a six-foot flying Rat of Vengeance comes at a cost, for 8 year old Bruce Wayne, it was helplessly watching as his parents were gunned down in front of him on the way back from the Theatre. The group bowed their heads as they gave a small moment of silence for the hero’s parents. Boomstick: That poor kid... that Opera really must have scarred him. “THAT IS NOT SOMETHING TO JEST ABOUT BOOMSTICK!” yelled an enraged Luna causing the rest of the group to nearly lose their hearing. Background Age: 41 Height: 6'2' / 1.9 meters Weight: 210 lbs / 95.3 kg Secret Identity: Bruce Wayne Net Worth: $6.9 billion Perfected every martial art known to man Has had 23 girlfriends. Kissed at least 60 women. (luna frowned at that one.) Wiz: Bruce's Genius Level Intellect and Physical Prowess allowed him to pick up a vast array of skills on his global journey to become The Dark Knight, He became an expert in the art of Disguise and a master of every fighting style known to man, He's perfected Escape Artistry, Sword Fighting, Detective Skills, Stealth, Has a photographic memory, Earned 12 Masters Degrees, An expert marksman and is vastly knowledgeable in Pressure Points. “It still never ceases to amaze me that a normal man can be so strong,” said Twilight in awe. While it amazed her how far humans have gone without magic it’s people like batman who have her respect them just as much as she respects Celestia. Boomstick: And we're positive he's not Superhuman. “Tell me about it,” muttered Starlight, still having a hard time someone without magic could be so strong. Wiz: Officially no he's not, but he has learned to appear so in the minds of his opponents. “haza!! That's the way to do it!” cheered Luna. “make your opponent think you're invincible and they will truly fear you!” “She seems to speak from experience,” joked Fluttershy quietly. Getting a few laughs from the rest of the group even the Doomguy doll had it’s arms up in approval of her joke. (*Cues: Main Title - Batman: The Animated Series*) Wiz: Having been trained by The League of Assassins, Batman's greatest weapon is Fear. This caused Luna to go into a bout of laughter as she thought on her early days as a princess, scaring any would be conqueror by just glaring at them. “Annnnd we lost her,” muttered Rainbow Dash as she stared at the night princess from a safe distance. Boomstick: All it takes is a glimpse of that pointy-eared Shadow and criminals start shaking in their boots, He can disappear and reappear in an instant thanks to his mastery of Stealth and the high-tech gadgets he keeps in his Utility Belt, like his Batclaw Grappling Hook (Spike:GRAPPLING HOOK!), Smoke Pellets, Tons of different Batarangs and... Shock Gloves. Utility Belt Batclaw Smoke Pellets Various Batarangs Explosive Gel Disruptor Shock Gloves Cryptographic Sequencer Forensic Analysis Kit First Aid Kit Wiz: Hey, Don't underestimate the Shock Gloves, they release a charge powerful enough to penetrate Kevlar, and even stop the heart of one of Batman's most powerful enemies, Bane. “Batty takes his joy buzzers real seriously,” Pinkie Pie said, impressed by the shock gloves. Boomstick: But then he restarted it because he's nice like that, Bane later said "Thank You" the only way he knew how. (Shows the picture of Bane breaking Batman's back) “YIKES!” Starlight shouted as everyone winced at the sight. “That's gotta hurt!” “My back hurts just watching that!” Rainbow added as Fluttershy hugged her for support. “THOU UNGRATEFUL WHELP!!” Luna snapped in rage, her Royal Canterlot Voice echoing throughout the castle. “HE SAVES YOUR LIFE AND YOU REPAY HIM BY BREAKING HIS BACK?! HIS MERCY IS WASTED ON YOU!!” Boomstick: I'm surprised Batty didn't pull something out of the Utility Belt to stop that one, considering it seems to contain anything Batman could ever need, even Shark Repellent. “.... what?” asked Twilight and Shining as the two siblings tried to process what they just heard. Wiz: Actually, that's a common misconception, the Shark Repellent was stored in the helicopter that Robin was flying, NOT Batman's Utility Belt. Boomstick (and Rainbow): Oh yeah, because that makes it SOOO much less ridiculous. Wiz: Batman also carries Explosive Gel. A cluster of this substance can be sprayed onto nearly any surface and remotely detonate, perfect for distractions. Boomstick: Or you know... BLOWING SHIT UP! Tempered Criminals, if you know Batman's after you, Avoid anything shaped like a Bat. “No duh,” muttered Spike. The scene changed to show a man walking into a dark room. Man 1: Somebody in here? He then spotted Batman standing in the room…. who stared at the man with a stoic scowl. The man stared at him for a few seconds…. and then left the room while closing the door just as his partner caught up with him. Man 2: Something wrong? Man 1: ….Nnnnope. “Smart move.” Rainbow smirked as everyone chuckled. (*Cues: The Dark Knight Triumphant/ End titles - Batman: The Dark Knight Returns*) Wiz: Bruce chose the guise of a Bat to project his own fear of the flying mammal onto his enemies. However, that is not the Batsuit's only purpose. Boomstick: Thanks to some Military-Grade Armor he stole from his own company with Morgan Freeman's permission, The Batsuit is almost completely Bulletproof, Knifeproof, Electricityproof, Punchproof, Dogproof and Theftproof. “That suit still impresses me to no end,” said Rarity as she imagine designing a suit that was both fabulous and functional. Batsuit Repurposed Nomex survival suit Almost totally bulletproof Flame and shock resistant Cape doubles as a glider Cowl's para-aramid fibers lessen impacts to the head Gauntlets armed with blades Conceals both heartbeat and heat signature Night Vision/Infra-red Lens Triangulation Imaging System Wiz: Inside Batman's Cowl is an array of High-Tech Gear commonly used for listening to Police Scanners and Communicating with Allies, but in combat, Batman finds more use in it's Night, Infrared and Ultraviolet Vision, also it's built in Triangulation Imaging System, which hacks into the world's cellphones and creates a Digital 3D Map. “That kinda feels like an invasion of privacy...” Shining said, Boomstick: You mean he can see EVERYTHING I do, just because I have a phone? Wiz: More or Less. Boomstick: Ask him where I left my keys… Everyone burst out laughing at that. (*Cues: Unknown Theme*) Wiz: Aside from Mass Invasion of Privacy, Batman's resume includes such accomplishments as dodging Darkseid's virtually unavoidable Omega Beams. “HE DODGED THE OMEGA BEAMS?!” screamed Pinkie Pie. Feats Avoided unavoidable Omega Beams Survived outer space for 24 seconds Bench press: 1,000 lbs Leg press: 2,500 lbs Can throw a batarang 100 mph Swapped a poison drink faster than the literal blink of an eye Broke into Area 51... and Area 52 Wiz: Withstanding the Vacuum of Space for 24 seconds and breaking free from a coffin, buried 6 feet underground, in a straitjacket after being deprived of sleep for days all while having a cocktail of unknown drugs in his system along with The Joker's latest Venom Toxin. Everyone had the jaws wide open at the crazy achievement for the dark knight. It seemed either impossible or even like the most bullshit thing they ever heard. Boomstick: WHAT THE FUCK?! ARE WE POSITIVE THAT WE'RE POSITIVE HE'S NOT SUPERHUMAN?! “I KNOW RIGHT!?” yelled Rainbow Dash. Wiz: Given his line of work, I wouldn't be surprised if he stumbled into a room filled with Gamma Rays or something like that... But underneath the Batsuit he is affected by knives and bullets the same as any other mortal man, even though he usually comes out victorious, his self confidence occasionally put him in life threatening situations he can't escape without help. Boomstick: Like Bane's "Thank You Spine Durability Test" “Dick.” Spike mumbled. Wiz: But the Caped Crusader has consistently found a way to survive even the most life threatening situations. Boomstick: And Bats has no problem continuously going toe-to-toe with evil in the name of Justice... Vengeance. Batman: From this moment on, none of you are safe... ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Again Batman had impressed everyone, especially a certain Princess of the Night who found herself even more entranced by the caped avenger. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Captain America (*Cues: Captain America: The First Avenger - Captain America*) Wiz: Born to poor Irish immigrants in Manhattan on July 4th, 1920, Steve Rogers grew up with little money, few friends... Boomstick: And even fewer Muscles, Good God is that Steve Rogers or Jack Skellington?! Somebody get that kid a sandwich! “Sweet Celestia he's skinny,” Rarity said in shock. While she's all for being thin and in shape, there's a point where the fashionista won’t deny herself food. “He needs a sandwich, salad and anything else he can eat,” Fluttershy said, horrified at such a person looking like that. Background Before transformation Height: 5'4" / 1.6 m Weight: 95 lbs / 43.1 kg After transformation Height: 6'2" / 1.9 m Weight: 220 lbs / 99.8 kg Both parents died early in his life Won the gold medal in an art contest as a teenager Was once mutated into "Spider-King" Secretly a habitual car thief Wiz: But his sheer willpower, selflessness and desire for justice stood out, As those around him left to serve in the Second World War, Rogers was desperate to fight for his country, but due to his lacking physique and health problems, he was turned away from every single Military Organization multiple times. The group gave the young Rogers a sad look while Twilight said. “It’s sad to see someone with such devotion to protect his country get turned away like that.” Shining gave a sad nod in agreement. “It kills me to turn away young recruits who want to protect equestria because of the reasons Steve’s military did.” Boomstick: Meanwhile Hitler was creating a new group of Super Nazis with Lasers, called HYDRA. (*Cues: Captain America: The First Avenger - Training the Supersoldier*) The screen changed to show the symbol of Hydra: A skull with octopus tentacles. “Wow, subtle.” Shining remarked sarcastically. “I’m not sure, but I think they might be evil, I’m like… 65% sure they’re evil...” Wiz: Desperate to combat this new threat, Uncle Sam began the top secret "Project Rebirth", it looked like Rogers would finally get his chance to be the hero after all, provided he survived an untested, unstable, unprecedented experience. “That’s… REALLY shady,” muttered Rainbow Dash. Boomstick: After an injection of some mystery juice and tanning in Vita-Rays, Rogers lived! And as a plus became a Nazi Annihilating, Terrorist Thrashing symbol of freedom.... Captain America! ' (Gunfire sounds as a Bald Eagle flies by while Confetti and Fireworks go off) Boomstick:MERICA! This shocked the group but ponies like Rainbow Dash and Pinkie Pie started to cheer at the spectacle. “Wow… that was random,” said Luna in surprise. (*Cues: Captain America's Theme - Marvel vs. Capcom 3*) Wiz: The Super Soldier Serum pushed Steve's body to the absolute limit of human physical and mental potential. Boomstick: A homeless guy sold me a Super Serum once, I woke up in Denny's a week later without my wallet… "You idiot…" Rarity and Starlight muttered. Wiz: With his new body, Rogers can bench press 1100 lbs and run a mile in 73 seconds, by comparison, the bench press world record without the aid of a bench shirt is Eric Spoto's 722 lbs and the fastest mile run belongs to Hicham Guerouj of Morocco of 3 minutes 43 seconds, that makes Rogers nearly twice as strong and over three times as fast as the most physically fit human beings in the world. “Damn,” Rainbow and Applejack said, clearly impressed by Steve’s new physic. Abilities Adept in all fighting styles Master tactician Multi-lingual Proficient in all weapons, though he typically only uses his shield Expert acrobat Capable of chi manipulation Can resist all forms of mind control Proficient in driving all kinds of vehicles Bench Presses 1100ibs Runs a mile in 73 seconds Boomstick: He can even dodge gunfire at point-blank range, by in his own words "Seeing Faster". Twilight and Rainbow glared. “THAT. MAKES. NO. SENSE.” Wiz: Which is the absolutely stupidest way of saying that his brain can process images faster than a normal human. “THANK YOU,” Twilight and Rainbow said loudly. Boomstick: Putting his new abilities to good use, he's adept in every single form of hand-to-hand combat known to man, That's right! I bet you didn't know that Captain America was a Ninja. Iron Fist: Jujitsu, Kung-Fu, Krav Maga? Captain America: All of the above. “Now that's mighty impressive…” Applejack smirked. Wiz: Despite his incredible physical potential, The military initially decided Super Steve was best suited as.... (*Cues: Captain America: The First Avenger - The Star Spangled Man*) Wiz: The US Army Poster Boy. Shining scowled. “That's just insulting…” “Yeah, don’t use your super soldier. Make him an icon. That’s how you do it, you morons,” Rainbow said sarcastically, waving her hoof dismissively. Boomstick: That suit looks like it was ripped from a Patriotic Circus. Wiz: It was... Boomstick: Really? Well at least he upgraded to suits not made for a circus later on. Wiz: No they were too. "What?" said everyone with a flat tone. Boomstick: What kind of circus would make a costume with Kevlar, Nomex and Lightweight Titanium that's resistant to Water, Fire and Electric Shocks? Wiz: Some call it World War II. Boomstick: Oh... I get it. (*Cues: Captain America: The First Avenger - Captain America March*) Wiz: But the most iconic aspect of Cap's attire is his famed Shield, composed of Proto-Adamantium and a mysterious metal from Space called Vibranium, this one of a kind Shield was presented to him personally by none other than the 32nd President of the United States, Franklin Delano Roosevelt. “Wow that must be like the time Princess Celestia presented me my Capten armor,” said Shining with a look of respect for the american hero. Boomstick: And like a badass, Cap doesn't just use his shield for defending himself, he hurls that Motherfucker at just about anything that moves! “Perfect shot,” Pinkie said, holding a card with a number ten on it. Wiz: The combination of the two metals allows the shield to absorb and reflect practically all kinetic energy and thus ricochet off multiple targets with only minor loss in velocity, Captain America utilizes this in combination with his Super Soldier mind to predict and calculate the shield's trajectory so that it always ends up back in hand no matter how many targets it has struck. “I need a shield like that!” Shining smiled. “Don't you already have Link’s shield?” “Yup and it's right here,” Shining said, levitating said shield out of his saddlebag. “Never leaving home without it.” Cap's Shield 2.5 feet in diameter, weighs 12 lbs An unrepeatable combination of Proto-Adamantium and Vibranium Its Proto-Adamantium is even stronger than regular adamantium Absorbs the full blow of any impact Conducts neither electricity nor heat Highly aerodynamic Can only be damaged by tampering with its molecular bonding Boomstick: Cap's Shield can reflect anything from bullets to lasers, decapitate vampires and stop a blow from Thor's Hammer, and if you recall, Mjolnir doesn't fuck around, this giant Frisbee of freedom is so cool, even Superman wants one! “That’s one powerful shield,” Applejack said, clearly Impressed. It was even more impressive to see the shield match the thunder god’s hammer strike. “I know,” Twilight said, wondering if it could block Tirek’s blasts or not. (Peggy Carter shoots bullets at Cap's Shield) Peggy Carter: Yes, I think it works. (*Cues: Captain America: The Winter Soldier - Lemurian Star*) Wiz: But it's not unstoppable, it's been damaged and even destroyed its fair share of times over the years, but only by Cosmic or Reality warping powers. Boomstick: Luckily Mr. America doesn't rely only on his shield. Wiz: He's boxed Thor to a standstill, was deemed worthy to wield Mjolnir and has even managed to incapacitate The Hulk with his knowledge of Pressure Points. (Shows three pictures of Hulk being overwhelmed by Cap) Boomstick: WAIT, GO BACK TO THAT SECOND ONE! DID THIS GUY JUST KICK THE HULK IN THE DICK?!?! “Pffftttttt,” Spike, Rainbow and Pinkie said while holding their mouths. The others were shocked and amazed that Steve was willing to kick the crotch of a green giant that looked like a mountain of muscles. Boomstick: YOU GOT TO BE A REAL MAN TO GIVE THE GREEN GOLIATH A NUT CHECK, I MEAN THAT'S THE FASTEST WAY TO PISS OFF A DUDE AND WHO DON'T WE LIKE WHEN THEY'RE ANGRY?! “That might be a death sentence,” Applejack said quietly, the others agreeing with her besides Spike, Rainbow and Pinkie. The last three were laughing so hard that they fell off the couch and onto the floor. Boomstick: Balls of steel right there, great big eagle-shaped freedom balls of steel. “Do you really need to talk about his testacles like that,” muttered Rarity with flaming red cheeks. (*Cues: Captain America: The First Avenger - Invader's Montage*) Wiz: And to top everything off, not many Superheroes can claim to have defeated the fearsome foursome of Crack, Weed, Ice and Ms. Fix, The literal personifications of actual Street Drugs. Feats Survived being frozen in ice for 70 years Can run almost 50 mph / 80.5 kph Caught a torpedo with his bare hands Threw The Hulk off his feet Jumps 20-30 feet high Drops from airplanes at cruising altitude into water without a parachute no problem Boomstick: So you're telling me he's preaching an anti-drug message, knowing that drugs are the entire reason he became awesome?! Wiz: I guess we can add "Hypocrite" to his list of aliases. “I can think of another superhero who holds that title…” Rainbow scoffed, giving the rest of her friends a knowing glare. Applejack scowled. “Now how in the hay-” “Remember, a real hero doesn't brag…. unless she wants to gloat about herself behind her friend’s back or show up at her own PARADE.” She fired back. All of her friends, except Starlight and Luna, quickly went quiet, most either looking away or had the decency to feel embarrassed. Wiz: Despite being a physically perfect human, Captain America more or less has the same weaknesses as any other man, his patriotic uniform can only protect him so much from stabbing weapons. Boomstick: And sniper bullets, God knows he gets killed pretty good by those. AHHH WEAPONS! MY ONLY WEAKNESS! HOW DID YOU.... KNOW.... “Dude… not cool,” muttered Spike. (*Cues: Captain America: The First Avenger - Triumphant Return*) Wiz: Even in the face of Death, Captain America always stands for what the United States needs. Boomstick: AND SOMETIMES THAT'S SERVING HITLER AN AMERICAN SIZED KNUCKLE SANDWICH! “Yeah!” cheered the two sibling of the group as they saw captain America as a awesome role model. Man: Who are you supposed to be? Captain America: I'm *pant* Captain America. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Wiz: Alright, the combatants are set. Let's end this debate once and for all. Boomstick: It's time for a Death Battle! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ The group admired captain america for his strength and sense of justice. “He’s a true solder.” Shining stated with full respect. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Death Battle An alleyway is shown, and we see Captain America drop from the top of a building. The camera turns into the shadowy parts of the alley, and we see two blank eyes. These eyes belong to Batman. “The soldier vs the vigilante…” muttered Rainbow Dash as she leaned further in her seat. “GO BRUCE!” yelled luna with her royal canterlot Voice. “Show him what a soldier can do, Steve,” Shining said. (*Cues: Batman: Arkham Origins - Assassins*) Batman approaches the good Captain slowly, and takes a combat stance. Cap responds, and does the same. FIGHT! As soon as those words are shouted out, Captain America instantly throws his shield at Batman, which hits and ricochets, allowing Cap to sprint and grab the shield. “The first hit,” Shining cheered, causing Luna to frown. Cap starts pummeling Batman with punches and kicks (due to his knowledge of pressure points and his study of different martial arts), but Batman starts avoiding the attacks, and counters with a kick. “Batman’s starting to show the difference in skill and power,” Twilight said, on the edge of her seat like the others. “Yes and those skills will be him victory,” Luna said with her own cheer. Batman throws some Batarangs, but said weapons are deflected, and Cap throws his shield again. Batman dodges it and shoots his grappling hook from his grapple gun in an attempt to pull Cap towards him. But Cap catches the grappling hook with his hand and his shield bounces of a wall hitting Batman in the back of his head. “Poor poor Batty, the Cappy is really giving him a beating cause he can see faster,” Pinkie said innocently. Twilight looks at her friend, scowling, and said, “Oh don’t you start with that bullshit.” “Language,” Shining said, not taking his eyes off the screen. Cap yanks the cord, and races to get his shield. As he retrieves the shield, Batman is flying towards him (Due to the grappling hook), and rams the shield into Batman's chest,knocking him into a wall. “Ohhhh,” Luna said, wincing from Batman’s pain. She felt then felt somepony pat her back as she saw it was Rainbow Dash. “It’s not easy seeing your crush get hurt,” Rainbow said quietly. Luna didn’t say anything but continued to watch the fight. Batman activates the shock gloves, which are useless against the shield. Cap pushes Bats back, only for Bats to spread Smoke Bombs along the floor. “Yes! Use stealth to catch him off guard!” Luna said, feeling her confidence rise. Captain America: Let's finish this. Hyper...! This is followed by the smoke screens going off, with the rim of the shield in the wall, Batman seemingly gone. Then, more smoke bombs are detonated. Cap looks around confused until a Batarang flies by his head. Cap throws his shield in the distance, and waits for a second. The group leans in, waiting for what happens next. The suspense was almost killing them. Nothing happens, until he gets his shield back, covered in explosive gel. The ensuing explosion makes Captain America stumble, and become woozy. Batman leaps in, and uses his knowledge of pressure points to keep Cap at bay. “YEAAAAHHHH!!” cheered the night princess in full volume, causing nearly every window to crack. As soon as Captain America collapses, Batman grabs the Shield, and walks behind Cap. “Oh this is going to be bad…” muttered Fluttershy as she hid behind her Doomguy Plushiel. (*Cues: Batman Begins - Train Fight*) Before Cap can regain his senses, Batman knocks Cap into the sky, and uses his grappling hook to grab Cap by the neck. Cap is jerked down, and the hook wraps around a lamp post, breaking the Star Spangled Hero's neck instantly as he hangs above the street. “OOohhhhh,” Everyone winced at the snapping sound. KO! Batman throws Cap's shield at the hanging Captain America, slicing off the bottom half of his body and after that throwing a smoke pellet into the ground disappearing into the night of the city that he was fighting The First Avenger. “That’s just adding salt to the wounds,” Starlight said. “YESSSSS!! YEEESSS!!! I KNEW THE DARK KNIGHT WOULD WIN!!” Luna yelled as she waved her hooves in the air and started to dance on her tippy hooves like a certain white dog. Results (*Cues: Batman Arkham City - Main Theme*) Boomstick: I pledge allegiance to the Cap, hanging miserably from the Lightpost. “DAMMIT BOOMSTICK!” Shining groaned. Wiz: Captain America did have the endurance and power advantage, and Batman himself has admitted he COULD lose a hand-to-hand match against him, but there's a big different between COULD and WOULD. “Ya! I COULD take on a army of monsters, but doesn’t mean i’m going to try,” said Rainbow dash with a deadpan look. “I COULD eat EVERY cake in ponyville but i won’t even try something THAT crazy,” said Pinkie Pie, knowing even she couldn't pull something like that off without something bad happening. Boomstick: I COULD survive a fall out of an airplane, but I WOULDN'T bet on it, unless you're doing it Wiz, you should totally try it, 5 bucks if you make it. While most of the group laughed at boomsticks joke or in luna’s case, still doing a dance of victory. The only not doing those things was Rarity who could do nothing roll her eyes at Boomstick sense of humor. “And maybe you COULD be a decent person, give it a try I might respect you a little IF you can pull it off,” said Rarity. Shocking the rest of the group minus one Luna who was still dancing. “Oh SNAP!” gasped Pinkie Pie. Wiz: You're an idiot Boomstick. Also the fact is, Batman is more than a boxer, his stealth and disarming skills allowed him to turn the fight in his favor. “While old capt is good in a fist fight, but without his shield he loses his edge in the fight,” lectured Applejack. Boomstick: Not to mention the gadgets, just because Cap could "See Faster" doesn't mean he can see hard enough to spot Bats through a solid wall of smoke. “Still a stupid way to interpret his brain’s processing power,” said Twilight with a deadpanned look. Wiz: Batman also regularly battles and sneaks around super beings far above your average Laser Nazi. Boomstick: If he can ninja around SUPERMAN'S Super Hearing, there's no reason he can't do the same to Captain America. “Ooooh~! I wonder if Brucy is any good at surprise parties!?” asked Pinkie Pie as she jump around the room in excitement. Wiz: And of course Batman has more knowledge of Pressure Points and fighting styles, because he's mastered all of them, rather than simply being adept, helping him incapacitate and finish off the Star-Spangled Soldier. Boomstick: Captain America just couldn't hang in there. “Really dude?” asked Shining with a raised brow at Boomsticks joke. Wiz: The winner is Batman. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Boomstick: Next time on Death Battle. the group see a man pulling a book and turn to explain to another person behind him. ???: I have a guide here that show you how to live from now on. Then the wall completely opened up and everypony was shocked to see a intimidating red and black mech standing there. the group now see various scenes of the mech fighting in a war zone even one where it sliced a couple of other robots with a green energy sword. THE 6TH GUNDAM VS The ponies and one dragon then see a man wearing white armor with gold trimmings appeared as he floated down before activating his own robot, which is a white tiger that transforms into a humanoid mech. ????: Tigerzord! soon a montage of fight scenes appear on screen while also playing what seems like the armored man's theme ?:WHITE RANGER TIGER POWER! WHITE RANGER TIGER POWER! TIGER POWER NOW! THE 6TH GUNDAM VS THE 6TH RANGER ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ “Well that was interesting,” Shining said, getting up from the couch and stretching. “I thought Captain would have won.” “Unfortunately he didn’t,” Spike said, jumping on his back. “Now let’s go to the box.” Shining just chuckled and galloped to the box as the other were trying to calm Luna from her victory dance. “Luna, you need to stop dancing,” Starlight said, trying to get the lunar princess to stop. “HA. I KNEW THE DARK KNIGHT WOULD TRIUMPH OVER THE LIBERTY SENTINEL,” Luna loudly said, still doing the snoopy dance in celebration. There was nothing that could stop her from dancing to this happy moment. “If you don’t stop dancing then you might miss out on getting something from the box,” Fluttershy said, just quietly enough for everypony to hear. “You’re right. We must get to the box post haste,” Luna said, pointing at the box across the room. Realizing her blunder, the night princess coughed and calmly said, “Let us see what we got.” “Yeah I’m hoping for something awesome this time,” Rainbow said, flying towards the box with Applejack in tow. “We might as well follow,” Rarity said as the rest of the ponies walked to the box. It didn’t take them long to reach the box as Spike opened it and peered inside. The young dragon reached inside and pulled out a bunch of Batman and Captain America comics. “Alright,” Spike said, handing out the comics. “That’s good and all but is there anything else?” Rainbow asked impatiently. That response earned her a smack to the back of her head and a glare from her fashionista friend. Clearing her throat, Rainbow asked, “I mean is it possible that there’s another thing inside?” Spike looked back in the box and leaned back into it. After a moment, Spike came back out with a bunch of action figures of both combatants. “These were in there,” Spike said giving a few of the figures to everypony. “This’ll go great with my other stuff,” Pinkie said, stuffing the figures in her mane. “I’m sure it will, darling. Though I might be able to use them for a few ideas,” Rarity said, scanning them. “You do that, Rares. I might just give them to Apple Bloom,” Applejack said, putting them in her saddlebags. She noticed that the princess was holding a familiar golden belt. “So you got Batman’s fancy belt, Princess?” Applejack asked curiously. “Tis true Honest Applejack. I have recieved the Dark knight’s belt. I was running low on a few things anyways,” Luna said proudly while muttering the last part. “What was that?” Applejack asked. “Nothing,” Luna said quickly. “But I’m sure we heard…,” Starlight began to say, wanting to know what the night princess said. She wouldn’t get the chance as the sound of breaking glass behind the group. The group turned and saw a lone changeling, but not just any changeling crashed through the window. It was an older changeling, one who didn’t believe in friendship and didn’t change like the rest of his brethren. “DEATH TO EQUESTRIAAAA,” the changeling yelled, holding a dagger as it descended onto the ponies. It didn’t even get within ten feet of them as a dark blue beam hit the would be assassin, knocking him out. “Oh look, a changeling assassin. Let’s get it out of here and continue this conversation never,” Luna said quickly, dragging the assassin out the door. “... o~k! Said Twilight, completely thrown off guard after that completely random moment. “Guess we have to wait for Luna,” Shining Armor said a bit depressed. “Something wrong Shining?” Twilight asked, looking at her crestfallen brother. “Oh I was just hoping to get Captain America’s shield, sis,” Shining said, levitating his Hyrulian shield in front of him. “It would have been cool to have it.” Just as he said that, the box started to glow as a small tornado came out of it. Now seeing small tornados wasn’t anything new for these ponies but it was surprising to see it suck the shield into the box as the lids closed. “What the?” Shining said confused, walking towards the box. He was just about to touch the it when it jump and made a strange rapid tinging noise. That was the time for him to back away as the box was bouncing as it made various crashing noises. After a few minutes, the box lids opened and launched a circular wrapped object back at Shining. “Uh what just happened?” Rainbow asked, not sure if she saw right. Shining didn’t answer as he began to unwrap the object. Once the cloth was removed, he saw a familiar red, white and blue shield in front of him. “Woah,” he said, surprised by this outcome. “Did you just get Captain America’s shield?” Spike said, amazed at the patriotic shield. “I guess so. Still liked the other one as well,” Shining said regretfully. Another object was launched at Shining, who caught it in his magic. Curious to what the object is, Shining unwrapped it to see what it is and gasped. Inside the cloth was a glowing sword with a red handle and guard. It had many red gems in the handle and along the center of the blade. There was even a small scroll wrapped around the blade which he removed and saw that it was a note. “This is one of Link’s most powerful swords, next to his True Master Sword. While it isn’t a shield, it can shoot laser beams from it almost every time you swing it,” Shining read out loud. “Wow! Now you have both a powerful defence AND Offence,” cheered Twilight in child like glee, already planning on asking her BBBFF if she could study his two new weapons. Shining Armor said nothing as he stared at his two new gifts before giving a small grin before swinging his sword towards the broken window, launching a magic beam through said broken window. The group watch the beam travel a good distance before dissipating into thin air. “Groovy,” said Shining with a even bigger grin on his face, causing the rest of the group to laugh at such a cheesy one liner. “Tee-hee! Well i gauss while we wait for luna i’ll go look for a spell in the library to fix the window,” said Twilight as she made her way out the door while the rest of the group got comfortable for what was definitely .going to be a long wait. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ CHAPTER END! NEXT TIME EPYON VS WHITE TIGER ZORD.
Tigerzord VS Gundam Epyon“Alright now that Luna’s back with the changeling nonetheless,” Twilight said, a bit confused at the situation. “We had to keep this changeling with us until the proper authorities arrive,” Luna said regretfully. “They should be here within the hour.” “Well I guess we’ll have to deal with this for the time being,” Twilight said, using her magic to levitate the remote to her. “So are you ready for the next episode?” “You bet Twilight. Giant robot battle,” Spike said, jumping up and down on the couch. He almost fell off if it wasn’t for Shining grabbing him at the last moment before setting him back on the couch. “Calm down Spike,” Shining said, chuckling a little. “You don’t want to hurt yourself.” “Sorry but I want to see the next episode,” Spike said, smiling bashfully. “Same here squirt but there’s one thing I’m curious about,” Rainbow said, floating above the two lazily. “How to get your own robots?” Fluttershy asked, trying to be helpful. Even Doomguy Plushie looked like it was agreeing with it’s owner with a small flag in it’s hand. “Well there’s that but what I want to know is what’s an Epyon?” Rainbow asked, getting blank looks from everyone in the room. The whole room was silent for a moment until the ponies in the room heard a faint noise in the distance. “Mineminemineminemine,” they heard a voice in the far distance coming from outside the window. “Do you hear that?” Rarity asked her closest friends. “Yeah, it sounds familiar,” Applejack said, straining to hear the insane mantra coming from who knows where. “MINEMINEMINEMINEMINEMINE!” the voice was getting louder. “Now that you mention it,” Twilight said, instantly recognizing the sound. “Wait is that who I think it is?” Starlight asked, feeling uneasy “MINE!” the voice screamed before a small crimson blur burst through the same window Twilight had just fixed and slammed into the bound Changeling with enough force to launch him across the room and through the other window, to where the group could see him flying into the sunset. As the changeling traveled farther and farther away from the castle, the would be assassin caused a twinkle in the sky. Everyone was silent for the briefest of moments before Luna broke the silence and said, “Well that takes care of that.” Looking at her fellow princess, Luna asked, “Who or what is that?” “That’s Deadman. He’s the one that send us this stuff,” Twilight said, gesturing to the box and TV. “I’m just not sure why he’s here.” “Yeah, hey Deadman. Why’re you here?” Rainbow said, lounging on the couch. “I AM HERE FOR THE BATTLING OF ROBOTS!” screamed the mad god. “Gees, you don’t have to yell,” Applejack said, covering her ears while Fluttershy hides behind her mane. In her hooves, Doomguy Plushie looked as if it was glaring at the god. “And anyways aren't you a god? Why would you care about two robots fighting?” asked Starlight with a raised brow. “You fool!” bellowed Deadman with such force, Starlight's mane was blown back. “MAN,WOMEN,CHILD, OR EVEN A GOD MUST RESPECT WHEN TWO TITANS OF STEEL DO COMBAT!” declared the mad god. “YA!” cried Spike as he gave the fire god a high five. “Ok? So are we gonna have anymore unexpected guests?” Twilight asked, as if tempting fate herself. The very next moment a grey furred pegasus with a blonde mane came through the destroyed window and worried. “Oh my gosh Twilight i saw something fly out your window screaming! Is everything ok?” asked none other than Derpy Hooves. She landed in front of the group and started to look around. “Oh great. Why doesn't the universe just bring somepony else here just to prove me wrong?” Twilight asked in frustration. “Well i mean if you insist,” muttered Deadman as he prepared to teleport to fulfill her sarcastic request. The very next moment Deadman reappeared with Flash Sentry in his grasp, twitching. “Wait what? Where am I?” the pegasus yelled hysterically. “FLASHY!” screamed Derpy, fly towards the pegasus and wrapping her hooves around him. Deadman gave a quick glance towards the writers and asked, “so… how much hate and downvotes are we looking at?” (more then we can ever imagined…) “It’s so good to see you,” Derpy said, nuzzling her stallion’s head with her own. “Same here, Derpy,” Flash said, blushing up a storm while hugging the mare. “So Flashy huh?” Twilight said, grinning at the embarrassed stallion. Before Flash could say anything, a loud clapping noise was heard as everyone turned to the mad god. “Well enough of this lovey dovey stuff! Time for some robot battling!” Yelled Deadman as he used all of his godly power to!... push the play button…. What? I’m not writing him doing something super epic for something mundane, go read a ShinigamiSparda story if you want insane balls to the walls action or play a Platinum game. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Interlude (*Cues: Invader - Jim Johnston*) Wiz: Evil: It has many faces, and sometimes even a good-natured soul may become its unknowing pawn. "I can understand how that feels…." Luna muttered sadly, Twilight gently placed a hoof on her shoulder and gave her a reassuring smile. Boomstick: Oh, did you say something? I couldn't hear you over GIANT FIGHTING ROBOTS! Seriously, what's cooler than giant robots? Absolutely nothing. “Darn right!” Rainbow, Pinkie, Spike, Flash and Derpy cheered. Flash was especially excited as he’d grown up reading a lot of comics with giant robots when he was young, this was a pure nostalgia trip for him. Wiz: The White Tigerzord, the sixth Thunderzord. Boomstick: And Epyon, the sixth Gundam. "Now those are awesome names for those robots!" Rainbow cheered with glee. “Ya!” Deadman cheered along with the Blue Pegasus, the two then gave eachother a high five while laughing. Once the two stopped laughing Rainbow Dash then realised what she just did before shooting Deadman a glare. “This doesn't make us friends,” she growled at the Mad God. He's Wiz and I'm Boomstick. Wiz: And it's our job to analyze their weapons, armor, and skills to find out who would win... a Death Battle. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Tigerzord (*Cues: Power Rangers - Fight (Instrumental)*) Wiz: Behold the Thunderzords, mighty bestial vehicles with a power and a force like you've never seen before. “Until you get to later seasons and things just get crazy,” muttered Deadman. Boomstick: Unless you live in Japan, then that shit's everywhere! “He's not wrong. Speaking from experience here.” Derpy added. “You’ve been to Japony?” Starlight asked. “Yeah, I took a wrong turn at the Crystal Mountains and ended up there...” said derpy with a hint of embarrassment. “.... how?” asked Twilight. “Well i was trying to get to my kitchen for a midnight snack,” answered Derpy with an embarrassed blush. “You ended up at Japony by trying to get to the kitchen?” asked Shining just as confused as his sister. Derpy just gave everyone a shrug while also sporting a smile, “I’m not a clever mare.” Wiz: The Thunderzords are piloted by the Mighty Morphin Power Rangers, five overbearing and over-emotional humans. Boomstick: Teenagers… "That pretty much sounds like that “human” world you visited….” Applejack stated, glancing at Twilight. "Yeah, but with magic instead of giant robots." Spike smiled. Deadman hummed in thought before giving an even bigger grin that Twilight saw and gave the chaos god a stern look. “NO.” Deadman just gave her a flat look. “But…” “NO! You will not interfere with the lives of my friends in the human world,” Twilight said sternly causing said god to huff in irritation. Wiz: For over a year, these five heroes defended the Earth from the evil Rita Repulsa and her cronies. Boomstick: But when her boss, Lord Zedd, showed up and started beating some serious Ranger ass, the team knew they needed some help. The screen changed to show Lord Zedd in all his villainous glory, with his dark yet vicious appearance and his armor resembling metallic bones. “Woah. That guy’s just creepy.” Spike shivered as Fluttershy hid behind her Doomguy plushie…. Who was now holding a mini-BFG 9000 for some reason... “He’s scary…” muttered Derpy in fright but quickly perked up when Flash rubbed her back smoothly. Wiz: Thus, a giant floating head in a tube and his robot buddy set to work building a new Ranger with a new Zord. Zordon: I present to you... the White Ranger. The screen changed to show room getting brighter, suddenly the silhouette of the White Ranger floated downward to the ground. As the light died down, what stood before the team was a young man in a white armored spandex with golden bracelets on his arms and legs, a black armored chestplate with golden shoulder guards, and a helmet with marking in the shape of tiger stripes. “So… cool…” Rainbow whispered in awe. “So majestic…” Rarity sighed with stars in her eyes. White Ranger (as Tommy): Tigerzord! (*Cues: MMPR - Go Green Ranger Go! (Instrumental)*) The Tigerzord roars as the screen changed to show the Zord in it’s pure unmatched glory; a massive mech that resembled a giant cat, colored black and white with bits of red, a golden blade-shaped tail, and menacing red eyes. “THAT IS SO AWESOME!!!” Flash and Rainbow cheered as they watched the Thunder Zord rushed across the battlefield with its pilot on board. Boomstick: The White Tigerzord is a gigantic weaponized robo-kitty. While cats are clearly inferior to dogs... “Blasphemy!” Rarity snapped. “Ah have tah disagree.” Applejack retorted, earning a glare from the fashionista. Boomstick: ...I might make an exception for this one and take it home. Wiz: Well, considering after it transforms to warrior mode, the Tigerzord weighs 150 tons and stands nearly fifteen floors tall, I don't think you'll find one in a pet shop window. Background The 6th Thunderzord Height: 152 ft/46.5 m Weight: 150 tons/136 metric tons Power: 75,000 Megavolts Top Speed: 115 mph/185 km/h Pilot: Tommy Oliver Power Source: Morphing Grid (*Cues: Power Rangers - Hope for the World*) Boomstick: And it's a Transformer?! Awesome! “I want one.” Flash stated gleefully. Wiz: The White Tigerzord is powered by the, quote, "White light of goodness", as is its pilot, the heroic leader of the team, Tommy Oliver, the White Ranger. “WHOOO TOMMY MY MAN!” cheered Deadman freaking out the others of the group from the chaos gods random screaming. “Wait! You now one of the fighters?” asked Rainbow in shock. “Oh ya a lot of gods from both sides of chaos and order are fans of Tommy,” Deadman said with a matter of fact tone. This little tidbit of info surprised the group and they couldn't help but give Tommy a look of respect. Boomstick: He wasn't always in charge, though. His original powers came from the screeching, migraine-ridden she-witch Rita. Naturally, it was a trick and those powers came packaged with a curse that turned him evil. Again Luna looked down as she remembered the time the Nightmare tricked her into giving into her anger and becoming Nightmare Moon, but that train of thought was interrupted as she felt a gloved hand rest itself on her head. She looked up and saw that it was Deadman who was giving her a comforting pat on the head. Smiling, she gave the chaos god a nod before they went back to watching the show. (i'm using stuff from the MLP Comic for this.) Wiz: Luckily, Rita doesn't logic much, so the Rangers reversed the spell by destroying a completely unrelated object. Que Twilight, Shining, and Starlight face hoofing at the stupidity of one Rita Repulsa. Tommy Oliver Pilot White Mighty Morphin' Power Ranger Height: 5'11"/1.8 m Weight: 214 lbs/97 kg Weapons: Saba Length: 20 in/51 cm Sentient sabre Can fire lasers & fly independently Martial arts: Karate, Kenpo, Taekwondo, Judo, Shinkido Has had 5 different Ranger powers Boomstick: Tommy wields Saba, a talking saber that shoots lasers and remote controls the Tigerzord. “A sentient weapon?” Luna mused to herself. “That might prove useful..” (The Tigerzord trips and falls on its back, still moving its feet as if running.) White Ranger: Hey! I thought you knew what you were doing! Saba: I do! White Ranger: Yeah, you sure could've fooled me. “....until you want the thing to shut up.” Rainbow added with a chuckle. (*Cues: Unknown Theme*) Wiz: And is also... uniquely multilingual. Saba: That's right. None of you speaks bird. Take me over to the cages. Um... squawk, squawk, tweet, squawk, tweet... “He just ordered a salad.” Fluttershy blinked. Boomstick: Everyone that just watched that is now dumber. Our bad. Starlight groaned. “I felt a few of my brain cells die.” “I think i just forgot basic math,” muttered Flash rubbing his aching head but a small kiss to his forehead from Derpy made it feel a lot better. (*Cues: Power Rangers: Dino Thunder - Main Theme (Instrumental)*) Wiz: In battle, the Tigerzord's tail doubles as a golden tiger sword. Boomstick: Which can light itself on fire, I assume, by sparking a robo-fart of some sort. See, Wiz? I can science too. “No. No you can not.” Twilight scowled. Boomstick: Anyway, the Tigerzord knocks foes off their feet with sonic blasts, temporarily increases agility with hyper speed, and shoots fireballs from its... chest mouth thing. (The Tigerzord prepares to unleash a fireball.) White Ranger: White Tiger Thunderbolt! Armed and ready! It fires, which hits Nimrod. White Ranger: *laughs* (*Cues: Power Rangers - Combat (Instrumental)*) Wiz: The Tigerzord's greatest asset, however, is its ability to mimic the movements of its pilot. (*Cues: MMPR - White Ranger Tiger Power*) (The Tigerzord punches and kicks Nimrod, knocking her to the ground.) Arsenal Golden Tiger Sword White Tiger Thunderbolts Sonic roar Hyperspeed Shoulder charge Pilot mimicry (*Cues back to Combat*) Wiz: So it's important to determine how superhuman the White Ranger is, but he doesn't have many measurable feats. Fortunately, all Ranger powers are derived from the same Morphing Grid, a galaxy-spanning energy field which balances all life. Boomstick: So... the Force. “Pretty much,” Deadman said with a shrug. Wiz: Yeah, pretty much. This means all Rangers have comparable powers that we can use to measure Tommy's potential. Boomstick: The SPD Green Ranger Bridge Carson once lifted and threw a two-ton car at this poor girl, who he guessed was a demon. Luckily, he was right and a PR catastrophe was avoided. “While i’m glad he was right he still shouldn't have put what could've been an ordinary citizen's life at risk,” said Shining Sternly. Wiz: The average man can squat-lift about 125 lbs, so this feat makes Power Rangers at least 32 times stronger. “Wow,” muttered Fluttershy shyly. Saba: That was most impressive. “I agree with Saby!” giggled out Pinkie Pie. Wiz: And we know Rangers also receive a speed boost, so it's reasonable to believe that a morphed Ranger's reaction speed is in the ballpark of 32 times faster than the average person. Thus, the White Ranger can actually react to attacks in about six milliseconds. To compare, in the same given time, a bullet fired from a gun would've only traveled about nine feet. As the Tigerzord mimics the White Ranger in real-time, it must be capable of the same speeds. “That’s a lot of assumptions if you ask me,” muttered.Applejack. “There just working with what they got,” countered Rarity causing Applejack to agree with her on that. Boomstick: I bet he could totally do that knife finger stabby game. Actually, uh, Wiz, put your hand on the table. Wiz: NO! Not after last time! That poor intern... “Poor Mr intern,” muttered Derpy and Fluttershy in pity. Boomstick: I told him not to move! “Sigh…. Boomstick you idiot,” sighed a frustrated Rarity, Wiz: Anyway, like that intern, the Tigerzord can't always cut it on its own. (*Cues: MMPR - Zords (Instrumental)*) Boomstick: When that happens, Tommy's friends usually come in to save his ass, but even though they won't be able to help him today, Tommy can still call upon his secret weapon. Wiz: Each Power Ranger has his or her individual Zord, which only they can pilot. However, there have been numerous instances when a Ranger has called upon other Zords. So Tommy can call upon the Lion, Griffin, Unicorn, and Phoenix Thunderzords to create the Mega Tigerzord. Mega Tigerzord Height: 207 ft/63 m Weight: 336 tons/305 metric tons Energy Ball Energy Shield Bladed buckler Phoenix Strike (Finishing move) More powerful than the Thunder Megazord (The Tigerzord transforms into the Mega Tigerzord.) “OH MY CELESTIA/GOD IT’S SO. FUCKING. COOL!!” Flash, Rainbow, Spike, and Deadman all cheered with glee. Boomstick: The Mega Tigerzord is a massive monster of a mech. It's got an energy shield, an energy ball attack, and a wicked dropkick. Oh, and its finishing move is literally lighting a giant robo-bird on fire and shooting it through everyone in its path. Obviously, the Mega Tigerzord has never lost a match. “Oh man Twilight you and me need to come up with a combo Attack like that!” cheered Rainbow Dash as she shook her Lavender Friend around in excitement much to the amusement to the rest of the group. “(Giggle) Dashie is really adorable when she gets excited like this,” laughed Pinkie Pie. “Heh, agreed,” said Deadman. Strength & Feats Beat Nimrod when Megazord failed Defeated Cannontop singlehandedly Stronger than Thunder Megazord Survived deflected Phoenix Strike Can lift over 1500 tons Tommy beat Pursehead one-on-one Tommy defeated 4 monsters at once Tommy defeated Goldar in several duels Wiz: The Mega Tigerzord is so powerful, it's even had that finisher move reflected back at it, survived, and all it did was fall over and look surprised. “Enduring your own attack?” Rainbow mused to herself. “Either it held back or that thing's super-durable.” Boomstick: But it's not all firebirds and rainbows. Enough damage can overload the Tigerzord's connection to the Morphing Grid and annihilate it. But don't get me wrong; this is one ass-kicking, Mighty Morphin', fire-birding, flame-swording power kitty! Meow. Weaknesses Defeated by Dragonzord in one shot No backup power supply Not very agile Destroyed by Rito Revolto Tommy's stubborn honor can sometimes lead to mistakes White Ranger: Saba, are you ready, pal? Saba: White Ranger, I'm ready when you are. White Ranger: Alright! Tigerzord! Power up! (The Tigerzord roars and then turns into warrior mode.) ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ The group (minus Deadman who already new about Tommy) agreed that the Tigerzord and it’s pilot Tommy Oliver were both strong and heroic. “I shall be rooting for the mighty tigerzord and the white ranger!” declared Luna. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Gundam Epyon (*Cues: Gundam Attack - Gundam Wing*) Wiz: In the year 195 A.C., yes, A.C., Earth and its space colonies were on the brink of civil war. Chaos had erupted, governments shattered from within. The only constant were five freedom-fighting mobile suits called Gundams. The group along with Deadman had to hold back their laughter as soon as they saw Twilight gain a starry look in her eyes as soon as she laid her eyes upon the gundams. (*Cues: Gundam Wing - Just Communication (Instrumental)*) Boomstick: Piloted by a bunch of kids who have no idea how to have fun. Seriously, get laid or something. Wiz: Intrigued, the disgraced commander Treize Khushrenada set about creating his own Gundam. While most of the ponies were impressed that Treize mad his own Gundam, Shining and Flash’s eyes narrowed when they heard the Disgrace Commander Part. Boomstick: For sex? “Oh god…” muttered Rarity, already knowing where this was going. Wiz: No! For Zechs. Boomstick: This is getting really confusing. “Only you Boomstick…” Rarity Growled. Wiz: Try and keep up. Treize hoped this new non-sexual fighting machine would finally answer the meaning of life and death. Boomstick: And birth! Wiz/Rarity: NO! “You stupid inbred hick!” continued Rarity as she went on a 10 minute rant using language not suitable for this story. (Treize removes a book from the shelf.) Treize: I have a guide here that will show you how to live from now on. “I really wouldn't want any advice from this guy,” muttered Spike. (holy crap i almost forgot he was in this!) “Agreed Spike,” said Luna in agreement. (The walls split, revealing Epyon.) “YES!” cheered Deadman as soon as his eyes landed on the 6th gundam, and while his outburst annoyed most of the group they could understand his enthusiasm once they got a good look at the fearsome meck. (*Cues: Gundam Wing - Legend of Zero*) Wiz: And so, the Gundam Epyon was born. “So cool,” breathed out Flash, Twilight, Shining, Rainbow Dash, and Deadman. Heero Yuy: Do you think you've built a god or something? Treize: Maybe I do. “HAHAHAHAHA!” laughed out Deadman as the rest of the group gave Treize an odd look. “Kind of arrogant don’t you think?” asked Applejack with a raised Brow. “I mean Epyon looks cool… but a GOD?” questioned Spike. Boomstick: Epyon is a fierce force of metal and badassery. Like all Gundams, it's armored with... Gundanium. Wiz: Yet another stupidly-named fictional metal that happens to be many times stronger and lighter than titanium. “Well Wiz it is a different world so it stands to reason they would have their own metal,” lectured Twilight. Boomstick: Standing 57 feet tall and weighing just under ten tons, Epyon is actually quite a bit smaller than your average Japanese giant robot. “Wow the tigerzord towers over the Little guy,” gasped out Pinkie Pie. ‘Poor thing,” said Fluttershy in a quiet tone. Wiz: But for what it lacks in size, Epyon compensates with incredible speed. With a max propulsion of nearly 200,000 pounds, Epyon can fly over 250 miles per hour. “Whistle~ for something so big it can sure take off,” complemented Rainbow Dash. Boomstick: But manning a Gundam at that speed is rough, and can kill a pilot who hasn't been trained. The pegasi in the room gave a bod to that little tidbit even ponies like Rainbow Dash needed rigorous training to hone her body to handle the speeds she go’s at a daily bases. Background The 6th original Gundam [Wing] ID: 0S-13MS Gundam Epyon Height: 57 ft/17.4 m Weight: 9.4 tons/8.5 metric tons Max Propulsion: 194,337 lbs/88,150 kg Pilot: Zechs Merquise Armor: Gundanium alloy Powerplant: Ultracompact Fusion Reactor Wiz: Epyon's pilot is the legendary warrior and Treize's closest friend, Zechs Merquise, the Lightning Count. Commander of the OZ special forces, valedictorian of a prestigious military academy, and sole pilot of the unstable Gundam prototype. “Ok i have to admit… THIS guy is a soldier,” complemented Shining Armor. Boomstick: How does the Wizard of Oz come into this now!? Anime seriously confuses me. Well, regardless, Zechs is a true warrior. (*Cues: Gundam Wing - Treize Kushrenada/The Man Who Makes History*) Zechs: I am a true soldier. Boomstick: Oh, look, an echo. This got a few chuckles from the group. Zechs Merquise Code names: Lightning Count, Wind Age: 20 Height: 6'1"/184 cm Weight: 168 lbs/76 kg True identity: Milliardo Peacecraft Valedictorian of Lake Victoria Military Academy Ranks: 0Z Colonel, Romefeller Count, White Fang Commander in Chief Wiz: Despite this, he could not handle the politics of war. After Treize staged a coup which spiraled out of control, Zechs stumbled through the ensuing chaos like a lost pup, always ending up fighting for the wrong cause by complete accident. Whoops. This caused both Shining Armor and Flash Sentry to facehoof. Zechs: I don't understand! Why am I still so... spineless? Boomstick: Oh, I have an awesome giant Gundam that everyone needs to do awesome stuff. Poor me. Wiz: But PLOT TWIST: Zechs has been hiding a secret identity. He is, in fact, Milliardo Peacecraft, the long-lost heir to the throne of the pacifist Saint Kingdom. Yes, the Peacecrafts literally craft peace. “Seems like a noble thing for a kingdom to do,” said Luna get a nod from Twilight. Boomstick: At first, the only one who knew Zech's true identity was his slap-happy admirer, Noin. You'd think a cheerful girlfriend who doesn't have blood on her hands would help Zechs lighten up a bit. But... “Tragedy struck,” muttered Starlight. “I hope nothing happens to her,” whimpered out Derpy. Zechs: Don't go getting too attached or parting will hurt. Noin: But my soldiers aren't ever going to be killed in battle. “That's just wishful thinking…” muttered Shining Armor. Remembering how all the men he lost during the changeling invasion and when Tirek attacked Canterlot, but he was brought out of those dark thoughts when he felt his sister Twilight pull him into a hug. (A black screen says "Exactly 1 minute, 10 seconds later"... then explosions travel across the complex, killing her men, followed by Noin holding one of her men in her arms before he dies.) Most of the group had a look of pity on their faces all except Deadman who just had a apathetic look etched onto his fiery face, being a god and also being the cause of a few worlds demise throughout the millennia has made him numb to this kind of things. Boomstick: Damn...he won't be hitting that for a while. “FUCK YOU BOOMSTICK!” screeched Rarity with a yell so loud you’d think she had just learned the royal Canterlot voice. (*Cues: Plot, String and Marionette - Gundam Wing*) Wiz: Despite being a backstabbing, coup-staging terrorist, Treize Khushrenada apparently has some high sense of honor, and this is reflected in Epyon's arsenal. “At least he has some honor,” Rarity said, huffing a bit. The rest somewhat agreed but decided not to voice their opinions on Treize. Boomstick: Aside from two tiny vulcan guns, Epyon was designed as a dueling suit, and lacks effective long-range weaponry. But that's okay, 'cause check out this sword!!!! (Epyon cuts through four robots, two with each swing, separating them from the top halves before they explode.) “Woah,” Spike, Shining, Rainbow, Flash and Twilight said in stunned awe. “IT'S SOOOOOO AWESOME,” Deadman said, completely fanboying over the sword. Boomstick: The Beam Sword is connected directly to Epyon's power source, which means its size and power can be increased on the fly. Epyon also has a durable shield which houses a chain whip called the Heat Rod, that can be superheated to slice through armor. “Those are some impressive weapons,” Applejack said while whistling. Unknown to the group, Twilight was paying careful attention to the weapons while making a note to recreate them later. (*Cues: Gundam Wing - Zechs Comes*) Wiz: But its greatest and most risky weapon is its on-board computer: the EPYON system. A modified Zoning & Emotional Range Omitted System. This directly links with the pilot's brain and aids him by constantly predicting outcomes and strategies in mid-battle. And unlike other zero systems, this modified version shows Zechs's opponent's' face as he's murdering them. This shock the group (minus Deadman.) why would sompony add a feature that made sompony see the face of the person they killed!? “Meh i’ve seen worst ways to lose your mind,” Deadman Commented. Boomstick: Oh, that's right. For the nightmares. “That’s creepy,” Spike said, feeling a bit unnerved by the image of Zechs killing a soldier. Unknown to him, the rest of the ponies were also creeped out at seeing Zech’s visions. Wiz: It gets worse. The EPYON system relies on Zechs ignoring all distractions, including his own drive to win. It predicts every possible outcome of the battle at hand and shares them with him. These include the outcomes where he loses, which take the forms of hallucinations. If Zechs can't separate fact from fiction, these hallucinations may become reality. That seems like a huge gamble to me,” commented Applejack. Arsenal Beam Sword Epyon Claws Epyon Shield Heat Rod Vulcan Guns Search Eye Epyon System Modified ZERO System Predicts outcomes in mid-battle Potentially harmful to pilot Can cause hallucinations Boomstick: But despite the danger, it's totally worth getting into Epyon's pilot seat, 'cause this giant robot is a born winner. It's capable of holding four other Gundams at once, survive the heart of an exploding space station, and destroyed another giant space station with a single, awesome sword slice. Ha-haa! Gundam powers, away! “I wish i had Gundam powers…” muttered Deadman in a depressed tone. “Aren't you a god?” asked Starlight with a look of confusion directed at the chaos god. “.... I wish i had Gundam powers,” Deadman Stated. Causing Starlight to facehoof at his stupidity. Strengths & Feats Held off 4 Gundams at once Destroyed Barge Undetectable by most scanners Survived explosion of Libra station Gundanium armor is several times stronger than titanium Zechs defeated Colony 191 in under 1 minute Wiz: Of course Epyon does have its fair share of weaknesses, and even though Zechs eventually overcame his turn to the dark side, nearly sacrificing his life for the greater good in the process, he never did quite become that perfect soldier he always wanted to be. weaknesses Lost dual against Gundam Wing Zero No powerful ranged weapons Suspectible to beam cannons Physically & mentally dangerous to pilot Epyon System may cause hallucinations & loss of control Zechs' obsession over Lucrezia Noin Boomstick: But good news: he did eventually get in Noin's pants. Worth it! “Of course that's a real victory to you!” huffed a ticked Rarity. Zechs: Just watch me! I'm gonna live right to the bitter end! I'll live the hard life of a warrior! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Wiz: Alright, the combatants are set. Let's end this debate once and for all. Boomstick: It's time for a Death Battle! Robo-style! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ The group, except Deadman, were impressed with Epyon and Zech’s accomplishments. Though they hated Trieze, they felt that Zechs deserved to be called a true soldier. “Me and the captain are rooting for Epyon,” said Flash. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Death Battle In a barren, hill-covered area, the Tigerzord in warrior mode slowly walks across while the White Ranger stands atop it holding Saba, who is controlling the Zord. “What are they doing Flashy?” asked Derpy as shy took a bite of some popcorn that Deadman made her with his magic. “Looks like training to me,” answered the orange pegasus. White Ranger: Alright Saba! Time for a weekly test run! “See!” flash said with a smile. Saba: Excellent! Let's test the weapon systems! White Ranger: Just make sure the safety systems are on. Just as the White Ranger says this, a blast fires from the Tigerzord's chest as the Zord falls onto its rear. Saba: Safety systems activated. “A little too late,” Shining said, shaking his head. The blast from the Tigerzord continues flying into the distance. Saba: Um... that will... probably dissipate, right? “Why do I get a he feeling that's gonna come back to bite him?” muttered Twilight. (*Cues: To Beauty, to Elegance and to Noble-Mindedness - Gundam Wing*) Elsewhere in the same area, Zechs is standing. He lets out a breath until Noin flies in inside her mech. Noin: Zechs... what are you doing down here? Zechs: Hm... hello Noin. Just brooding over how I nearly destroyed the Earth. “Wow, emo much?” Applejack said. “Doesn’t he have anything better to do?” Spike said, looking at the others. “I guess not,” Starlight said, shrugging. Noin: That again? You've gotta lighten up, you grump. “Ya i agree with Noiny you should go out and Party!” cheered the Pink Party Pony (ppp for short). Zechs lets out another sigh. “Wow! Way to be a downer…” muttered Rainbow Dash. Noin: Well... how about we do that thing you're always asking about? You know... that thing that rhymes with your name? “Giggity,” snickered Deadman while most of the group blushed. “Oh my,” whispered Fluttershy. Zechs: What? Really? Noin: Of course. I think it's finally time. Just as Noin says this, the blast from the Tigerzord hits her mech, causing critical damage. Noin screams and then the mech explodes. Everyone, except Deadman, winced at Noin’s death. Rarity was especially sad since they seemed to have their fairy tale ending destroyed by a fireball. Zechs: Noin? NOOO!!! “Fucking cocked block big time,” muttered Deadman as he took a sip from a soda… somehow. It cuts back to the Tigerzord. Saba: ...eventually... “Or it could cause a shit storm,” snarked Rainbow Dash. White Ranger: Huh. I think I'll drive. The White Ranger jumps into the Tigerzord. Meanwhile, Zechs, amongst the fiery ruins of Noin's mech, takes out a remote control and presses it. Epyon flies in right behind him and it’s eyes glow. “I think he’s mad,” Pinkie said, everyone agreeing. The Tigerzord resumes it walk, this time with the White Ranger piloting it. Suddenly, it stops. Saba: Warning! Bogey approaching fast! 200 meters! White Ranger: *groans* Must be one of Zedd's! Saba: Zero meters! White Ranger: Huh? Epyon flies in and strikes the Tigerzord from behind, then lands to the ground. Zechs: I'LL BREAK YOUR FACE! “Forget mad, he’s fucking pissed,” Starlight said, feeling sorry for the gundam pilot. “No fury is greater than a man going through blue balls,” said Deadman sagly. All males nodded in agreement while the girls rolled their eyes. White Ranger: Is it just me or do Zedd's goons keep getting smaller and angrier? “He kinda has a reason to be angrier than bull with a toothache ,” muttered Applejack. (*Cues: Gundam Wing - When The Dragon Swims Everything Ends*) FIGHT! Zechs lets out a roar-like shout as Epyon flies towards the Tigerzord. The Tigerzord blocks the blow, but Epyon flies behind it, striking the Tigerzord from behind with its beam sword. It cuts to the inside of the Tigerzord, with Saba floating alongside the White Ranger. White Ranger: Whoa! He's quick for a little guy! “Small, angry, and and blue balling… truly a terrifying combo,” muttered Deadman. Saba: Stop messing around and start defending! White Ranger: Right! Time for action! The Tigerzord starts charging up a move as Epyon flies toward it. White Ranger: White Tiger Sonic Boom! The move is successful, as Epyon is blown backward and falls to the ground. It cuts back to the White Ranger, now holding Saba in his hand White Ranger: Alright Saba, I want the Tigerzord to follow my every move! “That's still such a cool function for a robot,” cheered Flash. He lifts Saba over his head, then does two swings. The Tigerzord replicates the two swings to defend against Epyon's beam sword, then swings the sword rapidly, keeping up with Epyon's swings, before the two swords clash. It cuts to Zechs inside of Epyon. Zechs: You may be skilled... but you're too slow for Epyon! “You’re too slow!” jeered Rainbow Dash. As he says this, Epyon flies backward. White Ranger: How's this! Hyperspeed! The Tigerzord moves forward at an incredible speed, punching the fleeing Epyon, who then crashes to the ground on its front. The Tigerzord then steps toward it. “That’s pretty fast for a giant robot,” Rainbow said, impressed by it’s speed. White Ranger: Time to stamp out some evil! The Tigerzord moves its foot downward to stomp on Epyon, but Epyon flies out of the way just in time. Epyon fires its vulcan guns at the Tigerzord while it flees, which have almost no effect. “Oh ya it’s a close corner fighter type,” muttered Shining Armor. White Ranger: Huh. What, are you playing hard-to-get? Alright then. Go long! The Tigerzord begins charging an attack. White Ranger: White Tiger Thunderbolt! Fire! The bolt fires from the Tigerzord and Epyon activates his shield. While the shield does prevent damage, the blast itself knocks Epyon back. Inside Epyon, the EPYON system beeps and a red light flashes over Zechs. Zechs: The EPYON system indicates that you've shown your full arsenal. “Not all of it,” smirked Luna. The Tigerzord charges up once again. White Ranger: Fire! This time, three bolts fire from the Tigerzord. Epyon flies toward the Tigerzord, evading all three bolts. It seems that another bolt manages to hit Epyon, but then Epyon slices at the Tigerzord's legs nearly instantly, damaging them. Epyon then flies upward towards the Tigerzord's head, ready to deliver the final blow. Zechs: You're finished. (*Cues: A Whisper Under a Smiling Moon - Gundam Wing*) Suddenly, the wasteland is shown in a sepia-tone color, as is Epyon, but with the Tigerzord nowhere in sight. Epyon stops what it's doing. “What’s going on?” Fluttershy asked, feeling confused. She didn’t understand why the environment changed colors. Zechs: What? Then a massive shadowed mech appears in the background and moves its arm upward, ready to strike. A gleam appears from the hand. "Eeep!" squeaked Fluttershy as she hid behind her Doomguy Plushie. Zechs: What's that? The mech's arm starts glowing, then its chest charges with electricity. A sound of a bird screech and a lion roar plays, then the mech unleashes its attack as Zechs screams. Then the wasteland is in color again, back to Epyon and the Tigerzord. “Must of been the Epyon system showing him a vision,” theorized Twilight. Saba: Quick Tommy! The circle on its chest! It must be a weak spot! White Ranger: Right! The Tigerzord steps back and prepares a punch. (*Cues: MMPR - White Ranger Tiger Power*) The Tigerzord’s fist moves with incredible speed, then when the Tigerzord finally hits Epyon, it has no effect. “.... waa waa~” sang Deadman before busting out into laughter while the rest of the group was looking at Tommy with a blank stare. Zechs: Hmm... don't get cocky. White Ranger: What? He didn't explode? Saba: Well, this defies all logic! “What logic?” Twilight asked, not getting what Saba meant. “Explain, Saba.” (*Cues: Gundam Wing - OZ Moblie Suits Approach*) Epyon flies away from the Tigerzord, then grips its leg with the heat rod. The Tigerzord falls over on its front, knocking the White Ranger and Saba down. White Ranger: We're grounded! Saba: Tommy! Call the Zords! The White Ranger picks up Saba. White Ranger: You got it! He holds Saba upward. White Ranger: I need Thunderzord Power! Now! “YES!” cheered Luna, feeling like her victory was insured. (*Cues: MMPR - Zords (Instrumental)*) The clouds cover the sky as lightning strikes multiple times. All four other Zords appear and then in a flash, the Tigerzord has become the Mega Tigerzord. Zechs: Oh shit. “Oh shit indeed,” Shining and Spike said in awe. “Language, Spike,” Twilight yelled. “Sorry,” Spike muttered to the lavender princess. The Mega Tigerzord charges toward Epyon, who tries to block the blow, but is knocked back. Epyon is then grabbed by the Mega Tigerzord, who places it on its feet, flips over, and lands on the ground. Epyon is knocked upward, allowing the Mega Tigerzord to punch it multiple times before knocking it upward even further with an uppercut. The Mega Tigerzord jumps after Epyon and flies above it, then kicks it back to the ground with both its feet. It then puts both of its arms up into the air, charging up an energy ball, then throws it downward. Epyon manages to regain control and avoids crashing into the ground. “Wombo-Combo!” yelled Deadman. Zechs: No, not like this! Epyon turns to face the incoming energy ball and uses the heat rod to block, which successfully stops the attack. The Mega Tigerzord puts its arm up and begins charging up an attack. Zechs then sees the shadowy mech doing the same move, and realizes that it was the move that destroyed him in his hallucination. “..... uh-oh,” muttered Luna who broke out into a cold sweat as she quickly found out what was about to happen. Zechs: Here it comes. The Mega Tigerzord unleashes a giant beam, which Epyon flies out of the way of. (*Cues: Gundam Wing - White Reflection*) "Oh what a lovely song," said Rarity as the rest of the group agreed. Zechs: Routing all power to thrusters! Epyon flies right behind the Mega Tigerzord by its head. Zechs: And now to the beam saber! Epyon takes out its beam saber and charges with energy. Zechs: For... NOOOIIIN! White Ranger: UGH! NO! Saba: SON OF A BIIIIII- “YEEESSSSSS!” cheered Deadman, Flash, and Shining Armor. “NOOOOOO!!!” cried out Luna. After a single slash from the full-powered beam saber, Epyon lands to the ground as the Mega Tigerzord reaches critical condition and overloads its connection to the Morphing Grid. The top half begins to slide off the bottom half, then it explodes as the White Ranger screams. All that remains is the Mega Tigerzord's bottom half. KO! Zordon is crying over the death of the White Ranger, the Command Center filling with tears, while Zechs is by Noin's mech crying over her death with a puddle of tears below him. “Now that's a bittersweet victory…” Starlight said sadly. Results (*Cues: Rhythm Eros - Fan Remix of Rhythm Emotion - Gundam Wing*) Boomstick(and Flash): Ow! My childhood! “He had a childhood?” Starlight asked, slightly interested. “It was probably filled with his beer and other juvenile things,” Rarity said in distaste. Wiz: This was a surprisingly close call. At first glance, The Tigerzord towers over Epyon and is fast enough to keep up with it. Yet Epyon destroyed Barge, a 26,000 foot long space fortress with one sword swing, just one! There's no doubt that a few swings like that were enough to overload Tigerzord's connection to the Morphing Grid. “One of the coolest feats we’ll ever see,” Flash said, starry eyed with everyone agreeing with him. Boomstick: I mean, this goofy-looking skeleton dude did it, so I imagine a giant laser sword wielded by a devil robot could do it too. “That does make sense,” Twilight said, remembering the giant skeleton. Wiz: Also, Zechs is a far more experienced and properly trained warrior, unlike Tommy, who was drafted in the middle of high school. But the Tigerzord wasn't helpless. Its Mega form even duped the Epyon System for a moment, but unfortunately for our favorite White Ranger, Epyon is an ever-evolving dueling machine. Boomstick: Stupid future-predicting robot, and its REALLY FUCKING SWEET SWORD! GUNDAMNIT! “HE'S SO AWESOME,” Deadman yelled, annoying the group of friends. Wiz: The winner is the Gundam Epyon. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Boomstick: Next time on Death Battle. The group sees a muscular man wearing a sleeveless white training gi and wore a red headband facing against a yellow and black clad ninja with two swords on his back and he a pair of soulless white eyes. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ “That was a good episode,” Flash said, getting off the couch with Derpy following him. “Can’t believe Epyon pulled it off though.” “I know. It was so awesome,” Rainbow said, flying towards the glowing box. “C’mon you slowpokes. I don’t want to miss this.” “Right behind ya Dash,” Applejack said, following her speedy friend. “Wait for me, Dashie,” Pinkie said, bouncing towards the box and her friends. Derpy waited everyone walk towards the box in confusion as they gathered around it. Turning to her stallionfriend, the cross eyed mare asked, “What’re they doing, Flashy?” “They’re just waiting to get some stuff from the box. C’mon,” Flash said gently as he lead her to the box. Once they reached the box, the glow died down as Twilight used her magic to open the box up and looked inside. “What’d we get this time, Twi?” Applejack asked, tilting her head to the side. Twilight looked back at her farmer friend and said, “It looks like we each got a set of gundam models and some power ranger zords.” Her magic pulled out a bunch of models of the main 6 gundams from Gundam Wing and a bunch Tigerzords and Dragozords from the box. “Gimme gimme gimme,” Pinkie said, grabbing hers. “I’m gonna make them pink. Sandrock looks pretty cool,” she said, putting the model down. “Oh, hey Big Zam,” Pinkie said, holding a box containing a bulky two legged green mech. “These are so cool,” Spike said, opening the Shenlong model kit. He started to look at the instructions to see how to put it together without messing up. Twilight set her to the side while looking in the box and said, “ That’s odd.” “What’s odd, darling?” Rarity asked, tying up her stuff so they can be easily carried later. “Is there something else in there?” “Wait there's something else? Please tell me it's one of the swords,” Rainbow asked, practically getting in Twilight’s face. With all the cool stuff the others were getting, she wanted something for herself. “Are there swords in the box, Twilight?” Starlight asked, hopefully. “I think we could use them,” she said, glancing at the mad god in the room. “No, it's just a package for Flash and Derpy,” the princess of friendship said, levitating as bulky looking wrapped parcel. Twilight then used her magic to place the parcel in front of the pegasus couple. The two looked at the package before they started to tear it open to reveal some bright red and light blue jackets. “Did we just get clothes?” Flash asked, taking the red jacket and putting it on with Derpy doing the same. Once the two had them on, they looked in the convenient mirror to see how they looked and were surprised. “Are we wearing Noin’s and Zech’s jackets?” Derpy asked, hovering in the air as she looked at her outfit. Flash was looking at his from every corner and said, “I’m liking this.” “I must say, you two pull off the look marvelously,” Rarity said, taking a few notes on the designs. Before anyone else could say anything, Deadman grabbed Flash and Shining while said, “Alright, I’m just gonna drop him off and then I’m outtie. Now say goodbye Flashy and Shiny.” “Goodbye Flashy and Shiny,” Everyone said, grinning at the pouting stallion as he and the god just popped out of existence. “I better go home and check on my little muffin,” Derpy said, walking out the front door and leaving the rest of the group to their own devices. The group just looked at the door before shrugging and turning back to the TV. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ CHAPTER END! NEXT TIME RYU VS SCORPION.
Ryu VS Scorpion“Alright. Ready for the next episode?”Twilight asked her friends happily. “Yeah/Yes/Hell Yeah,” everyone said at the same time. As Twilight levitated the remote to herself, she began looking up at the ceiling. Everyone just stared at their lavender friend as she was looking all over the place for something. “You okay there, Twi?” Applejack asked, uncertainly. “I’m just waiting for something else to come crashing down before we start the episode,” Twilight said, still looking around for any hidden surprises. “Just start the episode, egghead. We’re not gonna have anyone else come here and watch this episode,” Rainbow said, trying to get this episode started. Twilight just sighed and said, “Yeah, you’re right.” She then pressed play to start the episode. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Interlude (*Cues: Invader - Jim Johnston*) Wiz: Two marquis warriors, arcade rivals since the 90's, now facing off for true superiority. “So another fan rivalry?” asked Spike with a raised brow. “Seems so” answered Twilight. Boomstick: Ryu, the wandering world warrior. “Oh this should be quit the fight!” cheered Luna as she felt a strange connection to this Ryu fellow. Wiz: And Scorpion, the ninja from hell. “Well dang i gauss Ember is missing out on this one,” muttered Spike, he had a feeling that he was going to get an ear full from his fellow dragon when she finds out she missed an episode with a ninja. Boomstick: He's Wiz and I'm Boomstick. Wiz: And it's our job to analyze their weapons, armor, and skills to find out who would win... a Death Battle. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Ryu (*Cues: Street Fighter Assasin's Fist - Dragon Punch*) Wiz: Endlessly walking the earth and improving his fighting skill is the life of Ryu, the Japanese martial artist without a home. The group had to respect some that was dedicated to improving himself but that didn’t stop them from feeling bad about Ryu not having a home. “Poor thing,” whimpered Fluttershy as she held her Doomguy plushie close. “Poor fella, I couldn’t even imagine not having a home to come back too,” muttered Applejack. Boomstick: But there's more to this karate hobo than meets the eye. After being dumped on a doorstep by his douchebag parents, he was adopted by the mysterious Gouken. From that moment on, Ryu dedicated his life to martial arts. Probably on some sort of parental vengeance quest. “He looks pretty clean for a hobo,” Rainbow said bluntly. “Rainbow Dash, that’s a terrible thing to say,” Rarity sad, horrified by her friend’s choice of words. Background Height: 175 cm | 5'9" Weight: 68 kg | 150 lbs Birthday: July 21, 1964 Blood Type: O Dislikes: spiders, wearing shoes Capable of sleeping anywhere Has eyebrows so epic that they cannot be contained by his headband Wiz: He trained alongside his best friend and rival, Ken Masters. Gouken taught them the Ansatsuken, or Assassin's Fist fighting style. “Kind of feels weird to have a hero know something called the Assassin's Fist... Even if it does some pretty badass.” Rainbow mumbled. Wiz: But the name is actually a bit misleading. While originally designed as a means to murder, Gouken's personal take on the Ansatsuken is based around karate, kenpo, judo, and NOT killing people. Unlike the ways of his violent brother, Akuma, who, ultimately, would prove to be his undoing. The group was stuck between shivering in fear of the mentioning Akuma or bowing their heads in sadness when the show talk about Goukens death at the hands of his brother. (*Cues: Street Fighter Assassin's Fist - Lake Run*) Boomstick: Oh yeah, he can fingerpaint. Everyone gave the t.v a glare at Boomsticks inappropriate joke. “Dammit Boomstick,” growled Luna. Boomstick: Well the Assassin's Fist isn't your average McDojo style. His Ryu Shoryuken is an uppercut so powerful, it launches his victims sky high. The Hadouken uses a fighters willpower to fire a blast of energy and destroy evil things, like... waterfalls. Wiz: And... physics? “....What?” Twilight asked asked, seeing the tear and the waterfalls path. “Just calm down, Twilight. We don’t need you to lose yourself,” Rarity said, trying to calm her scholar of a friend. Luckily Twilight took her advice and instantly calmed down. Boomstick: And finally the Tatsu, uuuh... Tatsu...maki...senpuu... Wiz: Tatsumaki Senpukyaku. Boomstick: I HAD IT! Anyway the thing I totally know how to pronounce, gives the finger to gravity and lets him briefly fly around like some humans helicopter kicking machine. “Ya suck it gravity!” cheered Rainbow dash with a whoop of joy much to her friend Fluttershy embarrassment. “Please calm down Rainbow Dash…” whispered Fluttershy. Wiz: He also has a powerful step kick he calls the Joudan Sokutogeri. Boomstick: Hey! We don't have the translation for that one! I'm on it. “Oh no…” muttered Rarity, having a feeling that Boomstick was about to do something stupid. (*Types Joudan Sokutougeri into Google Translate.*) Boomstick: AND DIARRHEA JOKE FOOT?!! HAHAHAHA! Rainbow, Pinkie and Spike began to laugh at Boomstick’s translation as the others such as Twilight, AJ, and Rarity frowned, though Starlight and Luna were biting their lips, trying to avoid snickering. “I’m not even surprised,” Rarity said sadly, somewhat expecting this. (*Cues: Street Fighter 3: 3rd Strike - Ryu Stage (KOBU Inspiration)*) Boomstick: What does it do?! Kick people in the stomach so hard that he takes them to Brown Town?! “Gross,” muttered Starlight slightly green from the conversation. Wiz: With the CORRECT kanji it's more like... "High Level Leg Blade Kick". Boomstick: You know it's "Diarrhea Kick" forever in my mind now, right? “Same with us,” Pinkie, Rainbow and Spike said, calming down from their laughing fit. The others just rolled their eyes at the stupidity of the joke. Ansatsuken Fighting Style Shoryuken "Rising Dragon Fist" Generally Ryu's most powerful technique Hadouken "Wave Motion Fist" Contrary to popular belief, not actually composed of fire Tatsumaki Senpukyaku "Tornado Whirlwind Leg" Can safely pass over many projectile attacks Joudan Sokutogeri Forceful enough to bounce opponents off of walls Wiz: *Sigh* At the age of 23, Ryu entered the first World Warrior Tournament to test his skill. He swept through nine powerful combatants before taking on the champion, Sagat. After a hard fought battle, Sagat was set to take the win… The group shuddered once an image of the muay thai master and the air of power he gave off, add his towering height and appearance made most of the group want to run home and hide under their beds… well all except Rarity who was trying her best to hide a blush. ‘Such a commanding presence,’ thought Rarity as She fanned herself. Boomstick: ...until he made the mistake of being a good sport. After beating the shit out of Ryu, Sagat offered him a helping hand up. Instead of taking it, Ryu gave him a surprise punch SO HARD it ripped his chest open and nearly killed the guy. Dick move, Ryu. Dick move. This shocked the everyone and the more sensitive of the group where doing everything they could not to puke at the image of Sagat laying on the ground with his chest ripped open. “Oh god…” muttered Twilight while covering Spike's eyes. “Whimper,” cried Fluttershy while Rainbow Dash held her close while trying not to think about what they just saw. “I might hate losing but i would do that to the person who beated me,” muttered the blue mare. “That ain’t right,” Applejack said, not turning away as Rarity grew pale at the sight. “What power,” Luna said, amazed by the damage Ryu did. Starlight and Pinkie were crying a little at the sight as Pinkie’s hair went flat. (*Cues: Street Fighter IV - Theme of Evil Ryu*) Wiz: This was Ryu's first taste of the dark power buried within him. The Satsui no Hado. Literally the Surge Of Murderous intent. Boomstick: Still not as good a name as the "Diarrhea Joke Foot". “SHUT UP, BOOMSTICK,” Rarity yelled, feeling her veins pulse on her forehead. Wiz: The Satsui no Hado gives Ryu incredible power but at the expense of his humanity. He can tap a portion of this power to safely enhance his attacks however, should his desire to win become so great he would even commit murder. The Satsui no Hado can overwhelm him and he will lose control becoming Evil Ryu. “Just like every quick and easy power up,” said Twilight sarcastically. “Just like most of the baddies we’ve faced!” laughed Pinkie. Boomstick: Now we're talking! Wiz: Evil Ryu has enormous power to the point of being almost unstoppable. He can even blast a skyscraper to smithereens. “Again that is impressive for somepony who doesn't like magic,” said Luna impressed even if said feat was done using dark powers. Boomstick: He can teleport short distances, even passing through attacks along the way. More impressively, despite Gouken never teaching him this, Evil Ryu can use the Ansatsuken's forbidden technique, the Shun Goku Satsu, more commonly known as the Raging Demon. That sent shivers down everyone’s spines when THAT move was mentioned. “Can anyone use that technique by just using the Satsui No Hado?” asked a confused Starlight as she scratched her head in confusion. Satsui No Hado A form of ki based around man's evil nature Greatly increases the speed, power and ferocity of its user Grants access to the most fatal Ansatsuken technique, the Raging Demon Has an addictive quality, making it hard to turn away from Causes hair to turn red, eyes glow white, and teeth to sharpen (*Cues: Street Fighter IV - Akuma vs. Ryu*) Wiz: With this, Evil Ryu turns his foes own sins against them, and eradicates their soul. It was this exact attack, which Akuma, a master of the Dark Hadou, used to murder Ryu's master. Since then, Akuma has been haunting Ryu, tempting to succumb and fully commit to the dark Satsui No Hado as well, basically, this is "Karate Star Wars". “Pfft no way,” laughed Rainbow Dash not seeing the comparison. Boomstick: Oh, you call everything Star Wars. Wiz: Well, some even speculate that Akuma is Ryu's father. “What!” screamed the group, having a hard time imagining a monster like Akuma having a child. They shivered at the thought of what Ryu’s mother would look like if that was true. Boomstick: Mother of God...It is "Karate Star Wars"! “What a twist!” yelled Pinkie Pie. Wiz: But Gouken's teachings instilled a powerful belief in Ryu. If he can resist and shun this dark temptation, he can attain an even greater power. This caught the group’s attention especially Luna who felt deep down in her heart that she needed to pay close attention to what was about to be said. Boomstick: By detaching himself from all emotion, he enters an altered state of consciousness. “I don’t the sound of that,” muttered Pinkie Pie not liking the sounds of having to separate from your emotions to get stronger. Wiz: Like a Jedi. Boomstick: This boosts his speed, power, and can do all sorts of crazy shit to his abilities. Wiz: This is the Power of Nothingness. Boomstick: Stupid name! Wiz: The Power of Nothingness is more focused than the Dark Hado, allowing Ryu complete control over his mind and body. Gouken even once used this power to separate himself from his soul in order to survive Akuma's Raging Demon. Surprise! Obi Wan is still alive! The younger mares and dragon began to talk about that amazing power, Luna thought back to what happened after Akuma’s fight. She looked at her hooves as she remembered the power she felt that radiated off of them at that moment. She then shook her head and looked back at the screen, making a promise to see what that power was later. Power of Nothingness Foil to the Satsui No Hado Resembles states of being found in Buddhism Brings a hyper awareness of the universe to the user Boosts one's strength and speed without losing clarity of thought Causes eyes to glow blue-white Can be used to withstand even the dreaded Raging Demon (*Cues: Marvel Vs Capcom 3 - Theme of Ryu*) Boomstick: Ryu is skilled enough to take on numerous thugs at once, tough enough to survive being impaled, and strong enough to overpower the genetically-created super warrior Seth. Oh, and he's fast enough to dodge point blank gunfire! Wiz: Yet as Evil Ryu his aura's so strong he can just walk through bullets. Boomstick: That being said, being the Street Fighter poster boy doesn't mean he's the top world warrior. He's lost a number of matches fair and square against the likes of M. Bison, Oro, and even his best friend Ken. “Who ever this Ken guy is sounds like a cool guy,” said Rainbow Dash with everyone agreeing with her…. What i’m a Ken fan. Wiz: However, many of these losses may stem from his struggle to contain the power of the Dark Satsui no Hado, which is obviously quite difficult to do in the middle of a battle. “Sounds reasonable,” Twilight said, agreeing with the logic behind it. Boomstick: But when Ryu unleashes his full potential, stay the fuck out of his way! Evil Ryu: My name is Ryu, and the ultimate power has awakened within me! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ While Ryu had his fair share of problems, the group had to respect his drive as a fighter. “I shall put my faith on the wandering fighter,” said Luna. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Scorpion (*Cues: Unknown Theme*) Wiz: From Earthrealm to Outworld there were few who didn't fear the ruthless clan known as the Lin Kuei. Boomstick: Except the Shirai Ryu; a clan with some serious balls. Not only do they defect from the Lin Kuei, they mock them on a daily basis by wearing obvious palette-swaps of their clothes. They also like to pull classic pranks like annoying phone calls, TP-ing Lin Kuei homes and constantly slaughtering their loved ones. Haha, got ´em! “That is messed up…” Spike said as the others were shocked by the cruelty of the clan. Wiz: From the Shirai Ryu came Hanzo Hasashi, the hellish ninja of vengeance. (*Cues: Unknown Theme*) Wiz: But before he became the stuff of nightmares, he was once an ordinary young child...whose father just happened to be a deadly assassin. In hopes of sparing him from a violent life of regret and murder, Hanzo´s father forbade him from ever joining the clan. The group had to respect Hanzo’s father for wanting to keep his son away from such a bloody past, even if it was all in vain. Background Real name: Hanzo Hasashi Height: 6'2"/188 cm Weight: 210 lbs/95 kg Physical age: 32 General of the Shirai Ryu clan Kombat Styles: Ninjutsu, Pi Gua, Hapkido, and Moi Fah Strongly prefers foes to come to him Creator Ed Boon's favourite character Boomstick: Sorry son, you're not allowed to be awesome. “That sucks,” Spike and Rainbow said, pouting a little. The rest of the group just giggled at them before returning to the episode. (*Cues: Lower Mines/The Pit - Mortal Kombat Deception*) Wiz: However, as time went on, Hanzo became desperate. he needed a way to support not only himself but also his wife and son. Faced with few other options, he reluctantly disobeyed his father and began the life on a ninja assassin. While the group didn’t agree with his choice but they could understand and even respect why he chose to join the clan against his father’s wishes. “You’d do anything for you family,” muttered Applejack, thinking of what lengths she go to protect both her blood family and the family she and her friends had made. Boomstick: As a ninja, Hanzo is exceptionally skilled in Ninjutsu, Pi Gua, Hapkido and numerous secret Chinese martial arts. But it´s his weapon of choice that earned him the nickname Scorpion. (*Cues: Scorpion's Theme - Mortal Kombat 9*) Scorpion: GET OVER HERE! *Fires his kunai spear into Sub-Zero´s head and then tears it right off, letting it fly past him* “AWSOME! Cheered Rainbow Dash. Boomstick: While his kunai-in-a-rope is iconic and deadly, I´m more partial to whatever the hell that snake creature is that lives in his hand. Well, in whatever form, it impales the opponent and pulls them in close, usually for a sweet uppercut to the jaw. The group was creeped out when they saw that thing slithered out of his hand. Luna had the distincit feeling she might get a nightmare or two out of that. Wiz: This is similar to an ancient assassination weapon used in the Tang dynasty called the Rope Dart. It's extremely difficult to master, making Scorpion´s finesse all the more impressive. “Meh I think roping slinging gal like myself could handle no prob,” bragged Applejack in a rare moment of bausting. Moveset Kunai Spear Closest real-life equivalent was called the rope dart Also previously depicted as a mace or a serpent creature Has also been used by Reptile, Smoke, and Noob Saibot Hellfire Punch Fire Breath Leg Takedown Flaming Backflip Kick Scorpion Sting Boomstick: He´s also profesioned with several weapons like long swords, twin katanas and axes. *Scorpion knocks Sub-Zero down* Dan Forden: Toasty! This got a laugh from the group. Wiz: Scorpion´s weaponry and combat prowess were put to the ultimate test by the legendary Lin Kuei warrior Bi Han, a.k.a. Sub-Zero. “Wow that guy sounds… COOL~!” joked Pinkie Pie much to the suffering of her friends. (*Cues: Soul Chamber Theme - Mortal Kombat Trilogy*) Wiz: And things didn't go so well for our yellow-clad ninja. Next thing he knew, Scorpion was waking up in the Netherrealm. Boomstick: More commonly known as Hell. Bet you wished you listened to Dad now, then maybe you could have ended up in a happier place, with your murdered wife and kid--oh yeah, they're dead too. “W-what?” whimpered out Fluttershy as the rest of the group were also trying to progress what Boomstick just said. “O-oh my god.” gasped out Applejack as she saw Hanzo grieve over his deceased wife and kids. Wiz: Enraged at Sub-Zero for apparently killing all he´d sworn to protect, Scorpion scored a second chance striking a deal with the sorcerer Quan Chi. In exchange for his loyalty, Scorpion was resurrected as a phantom of the Netherrealm The group had to give some pity for the fallen warrior even if he was going down the wrong path. (*Cues: Reptile's Theme (Skrillex) - Mortal Kombat 9*) *Scorpion teleports out of the ground, lands and engulfs himself in flames* “TOASTY!” yelled Pinkie Pie. Boomstick: And being reborn as a demon of vengeance has its perks. Scorpion can now teleport, summon fire at will and create portals in and out of the Netherrealm he was spawned from, literally dragging others to Hell! Whilst there, his +1s can enjoy such tourist locations as Lava Pit and witness the corpse-burning celebration called: The Festival of Torture. Fun times! “Not my kind if fun times,” Pinkie said, cringing from the grotesque imagery. “Ah don’t think that’s anyone's kind of fun, sugarcube,” Applejack said, cringing just as much as Pinkie. The rest of the group were agreeing to that as the person who thinks that’s fun would be one sick individual. Wiz: The Netherrealm is the source of Scorpion´s demonic power and his strength rises simply by his being there. “That could be a deciding factor,” muttered Twilight as she saved that little tidbit of info for later. Wraith Abilities Teleportation Commonly used to surprise attack enemies from behind Netherrealm Portals Quick access to the underworld and back anytime Control over hellfire Explosive fireballs Summoning flames under his opponent Surrounds himself in harmful flames Can even breathe out fire Cannot die from physical attacks Boomstick: Scorpion is so vicious he can perform no fewer than thirteen different Fatalities. Wiz: He can rip a person's head from their body - spine included. “Damn!” cursed a green face Rainbow Dash. Boomstick: That´s not something you just do, that´s art right there. “I would have to question your taste in art,” Rarity said faintly as the others silently agreed. Wiz: Rip of his mask to show his true face- Boomstick: AAAAAH, WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT THING?!?! “Spooky scary skeletons~,” Pinkie began to sing before someone smacked the back of her head. “Now’s not the time for singing,” Starlight said, lowering her hoof. Wiz: And score a kill by transforming into a, well, giant scorpion, of course. ...or a penguin. Boomstick/everyone: Wait, WHAT?! (*Cues: Lower Mines/The Pit - Mortal Kombat Deception again*) Wiz: And although Scorpion was far from the most powerful combatant in the Mortal Kombat tournament, he has defeated lethal warriors across multiple worlds. He´s conquered sorcerers, demons, cyborgs and eventually avenged his death by incinerating Bi Han in the Netherrealm. Boomstick: But it turns out that that Sub-Zero guy was kind of innocent. The man actually responsible for the death of his family was Quan Chi. You know, that guy he swore himself to and has been working for this whole time? Man, Scorpion's kinda like the Charlie Brown of Mortal Kombat. “So let me see if I got this: This guy killed Scorpion's family, made it look like Sub-Zero did it, got him to work for him, and then tricked him into killing Sub-Zero so he could have another powerful minion?” Rainbow asked, getting very angry at the white sorcerer. “THE SORCERER MUST DIE! DIE A PAINFUL AND EXCRUCIATING DEATH!” Luna yelled, feeling nothing but contempt for Quan Chi. (thank ya shinigamisparda for the comment idea.) (*Cues: A Charlie Brown Christmas - Christmas Time is Here (Instrumental)*) Quan Chi knocks Scorpion down a flight of stairs. “Dick,” growled out Spike. (*Cues: Unknown Theme*) Wiz: As penance for his mistake, Scorpion dedicated his life after death to protecting the late Sub-Zero's younger brother...Sub-Zero. “... not very imaginative with names are they?” muttered Starlight with a flat look. Fatalities Spine Rip Removes victim's head with bare hands Presumely learned it from Sub-Zero Toasty! Scorpion's fire breath incinerates the target in seconds Hand from Hell A flaming skeletal hand pulls the enemy to hell Spear Slice Cuts victims in half and beheads them Animalities Becomes a scorpion and tears them in half ... Or becomes an adorable penguin Boomstick: Though he still found time for shooting three's, hitting homers, and hosting his own cooking show! VO: This week on "Cooking with Scorpion", learn about chopping.... (Caption: Yes...this is real...) Rainbow's eye twitched at what she was seeing. “I… I don't even…” “I have no words,” Luna said, unsure of what she was seeing. “This is just surreal, it's like if Tirek had his own tea-shop…” Twilight said. “At least he knows how to cook,” Pinkie said, happy to see the ninja preparing something to eat. She began to wonder if he could bake a cake or other pastries. Boomstick: Yeah, I'm not gonna trust anything that guy makes. Does he even eat anymore? Wiz: Aside from his weakness for the culinary arts, Scorpion's win-loss record is not as intimidating as you might think. But consider the outrageous scope of his competition. “Ya with the whole battling GODS,” snarked Luna. Boomstick: Any way you look at it, it's tough to be much more of a badass then a fire-breathing skeleton ninja from Hell. Scorpion: I am Scorpion, vengeance will be mine! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Wiz: Alright, the combatants are set. Let's end this debate once and for all. Boomstick: It's time for a Death Battle! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ The group had to pity Hanzo for being used and for going down the wrong path. “Ah think i’ll root for the poor fella,” said Applejack. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Death Battle (*Cues: Unknown Theme*) Ryu is seen standing in a mountainous location, when suddenly, a voice calls out to him. Scorpion: Get over here! “He’s using his spear,” Rainbow said excitedly, holding her hooves in front of her face. (*Cues: Street Fighter IV - Volcanic Rim Opening Version*) Ryu catches the kunai spear flying at him. Ryu: Can't fool me! He then pulls Scorpion into the area. Ryu: Come on! FIGHT! Scorpion teleports to Ryu which he blocks. He tries landing a flurry of punches but Ryu avoids them. Ryu punches Scorpion in the skull and knocks him over. Ryu tries punching Scorpion while he's on the ground but Scorpion teleports right before he does so. Scorpion: Come here! “That teleporting power is going to get annoying real quick,” muttered Rainbow Dash. Scorpion tries once again to catch Ryu with his kunai spear, but Ryu deflects the attack with his Hadouken, knocking it back at Scorpion. He then teleports before the Hadouken can hit him. Teleporting behind Ryu, Scorpion then punches Ryu in the face, disorienting him. While Ryu is dizzy, Scorpion summons a katana and attempts to slice him. But, before he can do so, Ryu wakes up and dodges the sword slashes, “Gees~ he was… CUTTING it close their!” joked Pinkie Pie with a huge grin. GODDAMMIT BARB/YANG!” screamed Starlight and Twilight. “Who the heck is Barb?” asked Applejack, weirded out from her friends outburst. “Ya and who’s Yang?” Rainbow Dash also asked the two unicorns. Said unicorns gave each other confused looks before turning to the rest of the group. “We… don’t know… muttered Twilight. “Ya it just came out,” said Starlight, wondering where her outburst came from. subsequently kicking Scorpion in the face with his Tatsumaki Senpukyaku, uppercutting him with a Shoryuken, then kicking him off the mountain with the Joudan Sokutougeri. Scorpion is on his knees. Ryu lands on his feet in front of him. Ryu: Can you stand up after that? “If it was any normal fella i’d say not,” muttered Applejack keeping an eye on Scorpion, knowing the hell ninja would not go down easily. “Ya if the guy can take on gods then he should be still rearing to go,” agreed Rainbow Dash. When Scorpion does not answer, Ryu slowly begins approaching him. Ryu: I'll finish this! “I think you should leave while you're ahead,” suggested Fluttershy quietly. “Well we all know that’s not an option,” Spike told the yellow pegasus much that pained her to agree with the young dragon on that one. Ryu throws out a punch, which Scorpion suddenly catches to Ryu's surprise. Scorpion: YOU WILL JOIN ME IN HELL! Scorpion drags Ryu close and opens a portal to the Netherrealm, dragging them both into it. “Aaaannnndd that's game,” declared Twilight. The rest of the group wondered what she meant before they all remembered that scorpion had a huge home field advantage. “.....dammit,” muttered the Moon Princess. (*Cues: Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance - Rising Action 1*) In the Netherrealm, Ryu and Scorpion face off again. Ryu smiles at his opponent. Ryu: Hmmm, this is some fight! “Well at least he’s enjoying it i guess,” said Rarity, not really getting the warrior mentality. Scorpion lets loose with a ball of Hellfire, but Ryu counters with his Hadouken. Scorpion suddenly teleports behind Ryu and kicks him in the back. He then begins alternating back and forth with teleportation attacks, landing blows and sword slashes. “Told ya that teleporting thing was going to get old,” muttered Rainbow Dash, He brings Ryu to his knees panting. However, Ryu bites down on the pain and warns Scorpion. Ryu: Neither of us has reached our full potential! Scorpion: As if that matters! “He’s right you know,” said Twilight with a know it all tone. Then Hellfire bursts under Ryu trying to burn him to death as Scorpion laughs. Suddenly, a voice calls out to him. Ryu: It's not over! Ryu starts tapping into the power of the Satsui no Hado as his clothes start growing darker. (*Cues: Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance - A Soul Can't be Cut*) Ryu's transformation to Evil Ryu is complete. “...ya~ even i wouldn't go that far to win,” said Rainbow Dash. Evil Ryu: Surprised? “Meh i’ve seen weirder,” shrugged Pinkie Pie. Scorpion fires off another ball of Hellfire, but Evil Ryu simply punches it away. Evil Ryu: I'LL SHOW YOU WHAT I'M MADE OF! Evil Ryu leaps forward and delivers several aerial Hadoukens. Scorpion dodges them but Evil Ryu lands on top of him, pinning him down. Using a Hellfire kick, Scorpion knocks Evil Ryu away and charges in with his sword. Evil Ryu breaks the sword with his hands and warns Scorpion. Evil Ryu: Don't expect mercy! “Geeze we get you're evil already!” yelled out Spike getting some laughs from the girls. Ryu lets loose with a brutal combination, including the Tatsumaki Zankukyaku, and the Shin-Shoryuken. However, Scorpion still gets up from that pummeling. Ryu's eyes glows as he teleports forward to finish off his opponent. Evil Ryu: GOTCHA! Evil Ryu then try to use the Raging Demon technique, but Scorpion easily teleports out of the way, and ends up behind Evil Ryu. Scorpion takes off his mask, revealing his skull as he tries his Toasty Fatality on Evil Ryu. Evil Ryu dodges it, and the two exchange blows again. Scorpion catches Evil Ryu with an uppercut, and using his Rope Spear, knocks Evil Ryu back and forth three times with a Juggling Combo. ending with a Hellfire blast that knocks Evil Ryu back again. Evil Ryu bounces away, then reverts back to normal Ryu as the Satsu no Hado is spent. Panting hard, Ryu focuses all of his remaining power while on his knees. Ryu: Concentrate... I will NOT succumb to evil! “But you just did?” said Starlight, but was shushed by Luna who wanted to focus on the rest of the fight but mostly she just wanted to see the power of nothingness. Ryu attains the Power of Nothingness, as Scorpion slowly approaches to finish Ryu off. Ryu focuses his power as he prepares to let loose one final blast. His eyes glowing, Ryu lets off one final warning to his foe. (*Cues: Unknown Theme*) Ryu: I walk the path of a true warrior. THIS IS THE POWER OF MANKIND! SHINKU-HADOUKEN! “Damn~!” said the group in awe as they all put on some sunglasses to keep the bright light from the Shinku-Hadouken from hurting their eye’s. Ryu fires the Shinku Hadouken at Scorpion, who makes no attempt to evade or block it. He is engulfed in the attack and is reduced to a standing, charred skeleton. Ryu falls to his knees, totally spent. “Wow…. toasty,” whispered Pinkie Pie. Ryu: I walk a path... with no end. “.... how’s he going to get out of there?” asked Fluttershy getting everyone to realise that Ryu was pretty much stuck there. (*Cues: Unknown Theme*) Suddenly, Scorpion's skeleton starts moving again, shocking Ryu. “Huh so that’s a thing he can do,” said a surprised Starlight. Scorpion: I will crush your bones! With that said, he fires a stream of Hellfire at the completely exhausted Ryu, who can only look on in shock as he is incinerated by the attack, reducing him to ashes. Scorpion then laughs. K.O.! Scorpion then turns into a penguin and lays an egg, which proceeds to explode and destroy Ryu's remains. “Really?” muttered Rainbow Dash, still thinking that penguin form was stupid. “So cute~!” but it seemed Fluttershy disagreed. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Results (*Cues: Mortal Kombat 9 - Shao Kahn's Throne Room*) Boomstick: I'm no chef but that looks a bit overcooked. “I agree!” said Pinkie, wearing a chefs hat. Wiz: Ryu's Satsui no Hado and the Power of Nothingness were incredibly powerful, but raw power alone is not enough to destroy Scorpion. Boomstick: Yet, Scorpion's advantage of already being dead didn't make this a cakewalk. In fact Ryu had a perfect way to permanently end Scorpion: the soul-killing Raging Demon, but he could avoid the instant murder move, thanks to his awesome ninja skills and teleportation. “This is why ninjas are cool. Teleporting and kicking ass is how it’s done,” Rainbow said, crossing her hooves. Wiz: Not to mention Ryu has very little experience actually using the Raging Demon anyway. But most importantly, Scorpion's strength increases the longer he remains in the Netherrealm, with no defining limit. Once trapped in hell with Scorpion, Ryu stood little chance in the long run. “Like i sai-!” Twilight was about to say but Starlight placed a hoof to her mouth and gave the Princess of friendship a flat look. “We know already,” muttered the mare with the rest of the group nodding in agreement. Twilight could only blush in embarrassment before giving her friends a weak laugh, “Giggle… sorry.” Boomstick: Zero chance if Scorpion just upped and teleported him into a pool of lava, which he could totally do. Scorpion was just too hot to handle. Wiz: The Winner is Scorpion. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ (no trailer for this one.) ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ “Our stars. We thought the power of Nothingness would have triumphant over the Hellish Ninja,” Luna said, stretching her wings. She then slid off the couch and said, “At least he died like a true warrior.” “It was a close match though,” Twilight said, walking towards the glowing box. “Yeah but ninjas rule. Now let's see what we got,” Rainbow said, flying towards the box. She seemed excited at what they could get from this episode. “We might as well,” Fluttershy said softly, following her impatient friend. The rest of the group gathered around the box as Spike opened it and peered inside. “Woah,” Spike said, leaning over the edge of the box. “Did you find anything, darling?” Rarity asked, slightly curious. “Yeah. We got some cool stuff,” Spike said, jumping into the box and rummaging around. “What did we get?” Rainbow asked, a bit too impatiently as she got closer to the box. “We got this stuff,” Spike said as jumped out of the box while waving around comics in one hand and a couple of action figures in the other. He started to hand out the stuff as Twilight used her magic to get him out of the box. “Better keep these away from Sweetie Belle,” Rarity said, storing her comics in her saddle bags. “Agreed. There are some things they shouldn’t see,” Applejack said, putting the comics in her saddle bags. “Wait, there’s something else,” Spike said, opening the box once more. He was about to jump back into the box when two small boxes rose in the air as Twilight took a look at the boxes. “Huh, that’s odd,” Twilight said, sounding generally confused. “What’s odd?” Starlight asked before she was pushed to the side by an impatient Rainbow Dash. “Is it another thing or two for one of us? Is it? Is it?” Rainbow asked, getting closer and closer to Twilight with each question. “Yes and it’s for Luna and Fluttershy,” Twilight said, levatating the boxes past a disappointed Rainbow and towards their respective owners. The two grabbed their boxes and began to tear off the wrapping to see what was inside. To everyone’s surprise they saw Luna holding a familiar red headband and Fluttershy trying on a familiar yellow and black outfit. “My stars,” Luna said, looking at the headband in awe. The small group were very curious about the headband and wanted to ask about it when they heard a deep voice say, “GET OVER HERE.” The group and Luna turned to look at their meek friend looking at them before she tried to hide behind her mane. “If that’s ok,” Fluttershy said in her normal quiet voice. “How did you….. Never mind,” Twilight said, not wanting another headache. “This sucks,” Rainbow said, pouting. “Language,” Rarity said, “But what do you mean, darling?” “It’s just that everyone gets cool stuff. Spike got his grappling hook, Shining got his awesome shield and sword and even the Dazzlings got those cool looking outfits,” Rainbow said, flying towards the box. Kicking the box, Rainbow mutters, “Stupid box.” To Rainbow’s surprise, the box opened up and launched a decent sized box into the air. Everyone watched as the box flew there the air and landed on Rainbow’s head as she said, “Ow. What the hell?” Rarity used her magic to catch the box before it landed on the ground and broke whatever was inside. Walking towards her friend, Rarity asked, “Are you alright?” “Yeah, I’m fine but what hit me,” Rainbow said, rubbing the top of her head. “Well it was this. And there’s a note as well,” Rarity said, handing the box and the note to Rainbow. The athletic pegasus took the note and began to read it as she said, “What?” “What’s wrong, Dashie?” Pinkie asked, tilting her head to the side. “Dear Skittles. Here’s your crummy gift. Now stop kicking my box, it took a while for Trepp to make it and i don’t want ask for another. Love Deadman,” Rainbow said, reading the not out loud. She then opened the box and pulled out a very detailed statue of Scorpian in his golden costume. “I’m guessing you’re happy now?” Rarity, Twilight and Starlight said at the same time. “Yeah, this is pretty awesome,” Rainbow said, putting the statue back in the box. “Gonna need to make some space for this,” Rainbow muttered to herself. “Alas my friends but i must take my leave now,” Luna said, levitating her stuff towards her. “Until the next time my friends,” Luna said before teleporting back to Canterlot City. “She sure likes to make her dramatic exits,” Starlight said with everyone else nodding. Later in Luna’s Room Luna had her eyes closed as she tried to remember the power she felt from those few weeks ago. She searched her very soul for this power as the lunar princess felt something. It was small at first but the more she focused the more that power grew. Luna started to rise onto her back hooves as she balanced on them with ease as she brought her hooves together and moved them to her side, copying Ryu’s move. Getting into position, Luna tried to focus all that power into her hooves as she pushed them forward and yelled, “HADOKEN.” She opened her eyes just in time to see a familiar blue blast shot from her hooves and into a wall and destroy it. Luna just stood their as the wall crumbled to reveal her sister Celestia was in the next room but she wasn’t alone. To her surprise, she saw her sister in one of those new hot tubs with a very buff looking pegasus with a long blonde mane and beard and a gold coat and had a hammer lying next to the tub. The hot tubbing ponies looked at the lunar princess in surprise as they sat there. “I can explain,” Celestia said quickly. Luna started to slowly back as she said, “No need, sister. I’ll just see myself out. No reason to stop on my account.” She used her magic to open the door as she slowly backed out of the room as the door closed.
Deadpool VS Deathstroke.~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ outside the fourth wall ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Me: ok everyone i hope enjoy todays chapter and i’m sorry about it being so late but the my internet was out this weekend. DP: that~ and the fact you were too lazy to get much done! Me: oh fuck no! I had to deal with the Gintama crew a few days ago! I’m not dealing with you! DP: too bad! You new this was going to happen once i was apart of this little story! >:) Me:..... fuck. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ It was a brand new day in Ponyville with the birds singing and the flowers blooming. All the residents seemed to be enjoying the weather as they went on with their daily chores and lives. But there were a few ponies and one dragon who weren't outside, enjoying the day. Inside the crystal castle, the small group were sitting on a couch as they waited for one of their friends to show up. Twilight and the others didn’t have to wait long as Rainbow Dash flew through the window and onto the couch. “Now that everyone's here, we can start this great day with a new episode,” Twilight said as everyone nodded. Just as the others were about to open their mouths to talk, the whole world just stopped turned into different shades of grey. No one moved a muscle or even blinked. It was as if someone pushed the universal pause button on God's remote. “Don’t worry. This'll only take a second,” a cheerful voice said as a human walked into view. The human was dressed in a red and black suit with a couple of harnesses that held a few guns and a couple of swords. He even had a red and black mask covering his face with only his white eyes being visible. “Hi, it's me the Merc with the Mouth, Deadpool. I'm here to help this story along so we can get right to what you want to see. Epic fights, good reactions and best of all, Me,” the now named Deadpool said, bowing to the readers. “I even got permission from the authors to do it so no worries there,” he said, a smile forming under his mask. “HE SHOT ME IN THE ASS,” an angry yet crazy voice yelled for all to hear. “WHY DID HE SHOOT ME IN THE ASS?” “Hey. It's not my fault that you were late to finishing this chapter. So zip it, Deadman,” Deadpool said, pointing at someone who wasn't there. “TREPP. HELP ME. AVENGE MY ASS,” the voice of Deadman screamed. “Avenge your own ass. I'm not dealing with that psychopath again,” the calm voice of Trepp said as the sound of a page being turned was heard. “YOU ASSHOLE!” Shrugging his shoulders, Deadpool waved and said, “Enjoy the show and remember like, favorite and subscribe.” He ran out the door while yelling, “Whoop whoop whoop,” as the episode started. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Interlude (*Cues Invader - Jim Johnston*) Wiz: They say imitation is the highest form of flattery, but sometimes it's nothing but a slap in the face. “Depends on how well you imitate them…” Said Spike, used to seeing a bunch comics with similar heroes and villains. “Though i think for some ponies they would still be offended,” countered Rarity, getting a shrug from Spike. Wiz: Such as the case when it comes to these two masked mercenaries. Boomstick: Deadpool, the Merc with a Mouth. “Yo Rarity why is your eye twitching like that?” asked Rainbow Dash once she new her friend’s eye was twitching after Boomstick said the second fighter's name. “I don’t know darling… it’s just i feel like i’m not going to like this one…” muttered Rarity as she felt like someone out there was laughing at her. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~meanwhile in space~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ “HA!” laughed Deadman out of nowhere, much to Trepp’s confusion. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Wiz: And Deathstroke, the Terminator. “Wait, so he's the robot!?” Pinkie exclaimed in shock. “No, I think he's just human.” Twilight tried to correct her friend. “But he's called the Terminator! Just like the robot!” the pink party pony insisted. “... sigh whatever…” muttered a defeated Twilight. Boomstick: He's Wiz and I'm Boomstick. Wiz: And it's our job to analyze their weapons, armor, and skills to find out who would win... a Death Battle. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Deadpool (*Cues: Marvel vs Capcom 3 - Deadpool Theme (8-bit Instrumental Version)*) Boomstick: You see him on T-Shirts, Internet memes, and EVERYWHERE you look at nerd conventions. “Ugh! Those outfits are awful!” Rarity gagged in disgust, a rock then suddenly hits her head from out of nowhere. “OW! What in the-,” said the fashion designer before she noticed a note on the rock. Note on rock: Hey, don't diss a classic look just yet, babe. ~DP “Uh oh!” Yelped Pinkie Pie before pulling out her party cannon out. (thanks the avenger.) Wiz: But the story behind this popular anti-hero isn't as light hearted as his joking nature would lead you to believe. “I have a bad feeling about this…” whispered Fluttershy. (*Cues: X-Men Origins: Wolverine - Wade Goes to Work*) Wiz: Wade Winston Wilson was a globetrotting mercenary looking for his chance to become the world's next greatest superhero. Then he was diagnosed with cancer, which hit him like a flaming semi truck falling on his face. Boomstick: That's...oddly specific. “Woah… that's… that's just messed up…” Rainbow said, feeling sorry that the would-be hero had gotten his dream snatched away by the cruel hand of fate. “The poor dear….” cried out Fluttershy, breaking out in tears as the rest of the group tried tier best to comfort their friend. Wiz: Facing the inevitability of death, Wade gave up. He abandoned his heroic dreams, stopped his chemo treatments, and dumped his girlfriend to free her from the burden of a man doomed to die. The rest of the group looked down in depression upon hearing this. Spike hugging Rarity tightly, Rainbow wrapped her wing around Fluttershy who broke down into tears yet again. Boomstick: Doomed, until he was offered a cure by Department K, the special weapons development division of the strange, alien world called...Canada. (*Cues: O Canada - English Chamber Orchestra*) (*Cues: X-Men Origins: Wolverine - Deadpool*) Boomstick: And by cure, I mean he actually was handed over to the Weapon X program, the same guys who gave Wolverine's bones the old chrome dip. They injected Wade with Wolvie's healing factor. “Wait, what?” Starlight blinked. “I'm sorry, how does one inject someone with someone else's abilities?” “It’s a comic… just roll with it,” suggested Spike. Wiz: Which I don't even know if that's possible. Do they have like a spare jar of essence of Wolverine or something? “I still want to know who this Wolverine is,” said Twilight, thinking this man must be a big deal from him being mentioned a lot. Background Real Name: Wade Winston Wilson Height: 6'2"/1.88 m Weight: 210 lbs/95 kg Place of Birth: Canada Aliases: Thom Cruz Regenerating Degenerate Ninja Spider-Man Lives with a blind elderly woman An even more cliched cosplay than The Joker Boomstick: With the ability to heal from anything, his body became a surgical playground for Doctor Killebrew and his assistant, Ajax. Just like Operation, only constantly hitting the sides, *buzzer effects* “YIKES.” Spike shuddered. “That poor dear…” whispered Fluttershy. Boomstick: but hey, at least he doesn't have cancer anymore. Wiz: Well, actually he still does. “WAIT, WHAT!?” Rainbow Dash fumed, rage evident on her face. “After all that pain and emotional torment, he's STILL got cancer!? What the actual hell!?” The rest of the group was in a similar state of shock and anger as Rainbow Dash. Wiz: His cells just regenerate faster than the cancer can kill him. Beneath the red and black spandex, he's basically a giant walking tumor, which can talk...a lot. Revealing the panel of Wade without his mask on. Leaving his disfigured face as Wiz describes him afterwards. Boomstick: (panicked) AH! KILL HIM WITH FIRE! “The Elements of Harmony!” screeched Twilight. “Daring Do!” yelled a frighten Rainbow Dash. “Anything!” screamed the rest of the group. Boomstick (everyone): *realized* Oh wait. We can't. (by the avenger) (*Cues: The Deadpool Game - It is a Trap*) Wiz: Meanwhile, among Killebrew's other prisoners, a gambling ring was formed. Patients would place bets on each other's survival under the knife. “Thats sick,” said Starlight in disgust. Boomstick: And these bets were placed of what they called "The Deadpool". Get it? 'Cause that's kinda where his name comes from. You know what, you'll see. Wiz: Unfortunately for Killebrew, Wade had somehow gotten superhuman strength, speed, and stamina. 'Cuz I guess they got a jar filled with that shit too… “Pfft Why stop there?” Rainbow Dash scoffed. “Why not inject him with lazer-eyes, metal bones and teleportation while they're at it?” “I think i just felt the cries of a million enraged fans after what you just said…” muttered Pinkie Pie shaking her head from the sudden feeling of intense hate. Wiz: He used these skills to kill Ajax and make a dramatic escape. Free at last, his fellow inmates inspired him to take on his now famous namesake... Boomstick/Pinkie Pie: Deadpool--- Deadpool enters in, interrupting Boomstick's last sentence. Deadpool: ♪DEADPOOOOOOL♪ Yeah! “Huh?” everyone but Pinkie Pie said dumbfounded. “Where's my Party Cannon!?” gasped out Pinkie Pie when she noticed her weapon of choice was missing, but she did notice a note on the floor where her connon used to be. Note on the floor: can’t have you shooting your cannon at the tv screen while i’m on it! - DP. Glaring at the note Pinkie Pie muttered, “oh it is on like Donkey Kong!” (this joke was made by the avenger with me adding a little bit more with the whole note from deadpool.) Boomstick: What the heck? (*Cues: Marvel vs Capcom 3 - Deadpool's Theme*) Deadpool: (chuckles, talks to Boomstick and Wiz) Oh ho I'm sorry! Please continue talking about how great I am. “Is he talking to Wiz and Boomstick,” asked Applejack, feeling a little bit scared now. Wiz: I was afraid of this. See, Deadpool somehow possess a unique awareness of whatever media he's in. Whether there be comic books, games, tv shows, or an awesome Internet show. Boomstick: Huh in the what now? Wiz: Basically, he's a pro at shattering the fourth wall. “Wait, so you're telling me he’s a fictional character that interacts with the real world!?” Twilight asked in shock. “But that's impossible! How-” “Twilight… i think you need to keep an open mind with this one,” muttered Starlight, much to Twilight’s discomfort. “Yeah, especially since I do it all the time!” Pinkie added, getting confused looks from everyone. Deadpool: Bingo! Oh hey, Boomstick! Tell your ex-wife I said hello~. ["Come Hither" Growl] “Uh-oh….” muttered the group as they noticed Rarity starting to twitch violently. Boomstick: You've got 5 seconds to get the hell out of here before I blow your head off. “Wow I don’t think i’ve ever heard Boomstick this angry before,” gasped out Fluttershy. “And here i thought he hated his ex wife. Guess the world is filled with surprises,” said Rarity with a hint of surprise. (the rarity part was by Pony Of The Ghetto) Wiz: Unfortunately, all that would do is piss him off. Bad idea as Deadpool is a Master Martial Artist, Seasoned Assassin, and a Raging Sex Machine --- what? “Oh sweet Celestia he's worse than Boomstick!” Rarity groaned. Deadpool: Yeah! I noticed that you left a few things in the script, so I made some changes. You know, just the "important" stuff. Like my penis. While some of the group like Rainbow, Dash Pinkie Pie, and Spike laughed at Deadpool’s antics ponies like Rarity where grinding her teeth to the point of making sparks. Boomstick: Well, if by a raging sex machine, he means getting down with a bloated alien, a shape-shifting teenage prostitute, and Death herself, he must have some pretty low standards. That's right; this guy literally tried to stick his dick in Death! “....this guy…. banged the Grim Reaper!?” Spike exclaimed in shock. “HOW!?” Boomstick: Maybe that's why he liked my ex-wife. (*Cues: Deadpool's Old Theme (Le Scar Remix) - Marvel vs Capcom 3*) Boomstick: But besides his dick, Deadpool has an arsenal of weaponry he can pull out from absolutely nowhere! Wiz: This is an animation technique commonly called the Magic Satchel, though its existence as an actual thing is preposterous. “Ya but i have a feeling with Deadpool this is the most tame of his reality bending powers,” said Spike much to Twilight’s growing frustration. Deadpool: Oh yeah? Watch this! Deadpool reaches out from the pit of the satchel, and pulled out a large elephant like pulling out a rabbit out of the top hat. *trumpets* Wiz/Twilight: (annoyed) I hate you... Deadpool: (opposite in same manner of "I love you") Oh I hate you too. Boomstick: Me too. “Me three.” said Pinkie Pie. Boomstick: Some of Deadpool's favorite toys include--- Deadpool's second attempt of interrupting Boomstick from finishing the sentence, again. Deadpool: My trusty rusty twin katanas, some grenades, my two favorite machine guns (Butter and I Can't Believe It's Not Butter), a teleportation belt, an infinity stone that alters continuity... (giddy) Ohoho I can't choose! I love 'em all! Boomstick: (peeved) Okay that's it! I'm gonna kill him! ((loud gun cock noise) aims his shotgun at Deadpool) The group busted out laughing at Deadpool’s zany antics, even Rarity was getting a kick out of Deadpool driving Boomstick nuts. “(sigh) justice…” whispered Rarity, savoring Boomsticks anger. Deadpool: La-la-la-la-la-la-la... (runs away unscathed; the missed gunfire just shot directly to the screen instead) “Sweet apple!” shouted Applejack in surprise, for a second thinking that the shotgun pellets where going to fly off screen and nail them. Abilities Superhuman Body Exceptionally skilled with swords and all forms of guns Mastery in assassination techniques and numerous martial arts Superb healing factor Magic satchel Contains various items, regardless of continuity Includes teleportation belt, machine guns, katanas, pistols and other things Fourth wall awareness RAGING SEX MACHINE (everyone facepalmed at this one.) Wiz: Combined, Deadpool's weapons and abilities has helped him to accomplish some amazing feats in spite of his illness. Boomstick: His quick draw's fast enough to beat 7 Hydra agents at once; he can decimate legions of armed warriors solo... while talking on the phone; he's the only one to ever outwit Taskmaster, who literally has the power to predict his opponent's moves; and in one instance, he even murdered the ENTIRE Marvel Universe, including the supposedly unkillable Wolverine. “.....well damn,” muttered Rainbow Dash as she in the rest of the group were left wide eyed at Deadpool’s accomplishments. “But why would he kill everyone?” muttered Fluttershy. “Oh don’t worry that was a different Marvel universe!” cheered Pinkie Pie, much to the group confusion which only grew greater when the tv froze and Deadpool himself popped on screen. “Ya! Don't worry, that was just a 'What if?' scenario. Besides, I killed that downer of an alternate self anyway so no worries!” cheered the merc with the mouth before disappearing off screen and letting the tv start working again. “D-did he just…?” Asked a terrified Twilight, who was trying to process what just happened. Starlight just shook her head and gave her friend/teacher a flat look. “Let’s just keep watching the show.” (Thank ya! shinigamisparda) Wiz: He did this with the sword made of Carbonadium, an alloy capable of nullifying healing factors. In other words, he cheated. “That's just cheap. Seriously…” Applejack rolled her eyes. “Meh i’ve seen way cheaper tricks in comics than that,” said Spike while giving the farm pony a shrug. “SEE! Barney the dinosaur understands what i did wasn’t the biggest ass pull in comic history, that honor belongs to superman comics!” cheered Deadpool as he popped on screen again just to disappear a second later leaving the group confused again. Boomstick: He survived skyscrapers collapsing on top of him, having his heart ripped out, his head blown to bits, and even his entire body melted into a puddle. Wiz: But his regeneration is also responsible for one of his greatest downfalls. This power has trained him to think he's invincible and so he becomes quite careless in battle. “That can be dangerous… thinking you're invincible can lead to you underestimating your opponent…” Starlight stated, getting some nods of agreement from her friends. Boomstick: And that just of his extreme ADHD hasn't already put him to a bind. Wiz: Yet there are few more deadly than the Regenerating Degenerate. Really, Deadpool finally accomplished his dream of becoming the next great superhero. Strength & Feats Navigated an obstacle course meant for Iron Man-like suits unscathed Completely regenerated from a single hand Sole person to outwit Taskmaster Can dodge point-blank machine guns Killed the Marvel universe Casually battled Red Hulk Once became a Herald of Galactus NOT GARBAGE TIER IN MARVEL VS CAPCOM 3 Deadpool: Aw, that's sweet of you guys! Wanna see me naked? Wiz: Wait, what? No, no, no--! Deadpool shows them his naked frame from the comic, scarring them from the disturbance. “MY EYES! MY EYES ARE BURNING! TURN IT OFF, TURN IT OFF, TURN IT OFF!!!” screamed Rainbow Dash as she tried to claw out her eyes. The rest of the group was not faring any better as most of the group was looking a little green from the image of a naked Deadpool… well except Rarity surprisingly. “I don’t judge a pony on their physical appearance if they can’t help it,” said Rarity. Showing she wasn’t as shallow as some thought she was. Boomstick: (groaning) Agh, my eyes! Can't...claw them out...fast enough...! Deadpool: Aaand now you're scarred for life. Let's see my competition. “Screw you man!” screamed Rainbow Dash. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ After the annalisis, most of the group liked the superhero wannanbe with Rainbow saying she would vote for him. Pinkie and Spike would also vote for him with the former being somewhat reluctant. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Deathstroke (*Cues: Inhospitable Island/Deathstroke - Arrow*) (DP: HAHAHA TINY PIC!) Wiz: In the history of the DC universe, there has never existed a more lethal tactician and soldier than Slade Joseph Wilson. After illegally joining the U.S. military at the age of 16, he fought in Korea for years where his skill earned the attention of an experimental serum program and the lovely Captain Adeline Kane. “Wait a sec, that sounds familiar.” said Applejack with a raised Brow. Boomstick: This is sounding suspiciously like the origin story of Captain America. “Oh, right.” Applejack sid with a nod. (the avenger). Wiz: Slade actually gets the girl. Boomstick: Oh never mind! But does he steal cars? Wiz: Probably. Slade completely mastered every fighting style under Adeline's tutelage in record time. (*Cues: Unknown Theme*) Wiz: Apparently, this impressed her so much, they were married with a kid on the way in mere months. “Awwww!” Most of the group gushed at the sight of a Slade and Adeline together. Boomstick: Now that's my kind of woman! "Oh, you're a badass? No roses! No dates! Let's fight people, get married, and plow." “And just like his marriage, Boomstick just ruined the moment….” said Rarity with a flat tone. (*Cues: Arrow - Deathstroking / Creating an Army With a Needle*) Boomstick: Feeling pretty fucking great about life. Slade volunteered for an experiment that would help him resist enemy truth serums. Everything went exactly as planned... Panels of Deathstroke lashing out appear along with the sounds of screaming and shattering glass. Boomstick: You'd think these guys would've learned by now. “You'd really think they would huh?” asked Starlight said in agreement. Background Real Name: Slade Joseph Wilson Height: 6'4"/1.93 m Weight: 225 lbs/102 kg Alternate Alias: The Terminator Known for terrorizing a certain group of teenage superheroes Will shoot children in the knee point blank using a shotgun Has yet to be accurately portrayed outside of his comics (*Cues: Injustice: Gods Among Us - Main Theme*) Wiz: Wouldn't you know it, the injection did not have the effects they were looking for. But instead of ruining his life forever, the experiment accidentally transformed Slade into the deadliest assassin in the world. A Terminator if you will... which begs the question: what on Earth does the U.S. military think is in truth serums? “Now THERE'S something I'd like to know…” Twilight mumbled. Boomstick: Slade rose as a new man known to the world as Deathstroke. A picture of Deathstroke is shown, but it has a top hat, monocle, mustache, and "LOL!" drawn on it by Deadpool to make fun of his opponent. “Pfft! Okay, now that's kind of funny!” Rainbow giggled. Wiz: Really? Deadpool appears on screen. Deadpool: Don't forget to like, fav, and subscribe! (as Curly from the Three Stooges) Whoop, whoo-oo, whoop! Deadpool then runs off, causing the whole group to burst out laughing. (*Cues: Deathstroke's Theme - Batman: Arkham Origins*) Boomstick: Deathstroke is nearly superhuman. He can hit harder, run faster, react quick, and push himself longer than an Olympic athlete. Plus, he can use 90% of his brain, unlike the average 10%. Wiz: Come on! If we really only used 10% of our brains, we'd be about as dumb as sheep! Boomstick: You're a sheep! “You’re an idiot.” Rarity deadpanned. Wiz: What's important here is that Deathstroke's mind can process information nine times more efficiently than an ordinary man. He can think quicker, hear better, and see faster -- God dammit, that's not a real thing! “What?! AGAIN! That's the stupidest thing I have ever heard!!” yelled Twilight as she Goes on a rant. Boomstick: Ooh! We should put him and Captain America into a staring contest! Wiz(Twilight): *groans* He also has a healing factor, which can repair any part of his body... even if his brain is blown to smithereens. (the avenger) Boomstick: Bringing him back from the dead. Abilities Enhanced mind Blazingly fast reaction times Nine times the normal processing speed Enhanced body Superior strength, speed, and durability Adaptive healing factor Mastery in boxing, jiujitsu, karate, ninjutsu, and sword fighting Extensive knowledge of battle tactics (*Cues: Unknown Theme*) Wiz: Unfortunately, life back home was rough for Slade. His abilities were put to the test when his son was kidnapped by a group of rival mercenaries. Despite a successful rescue, his son lost the ability to speak. “Poor boy,” Fluttershy, Rarity and Applejack said sadly. Boomstick: So his ungrateful wife lashed out in rage and Slade was never the same. Wiz: Literally. A picture of Adeline pointing a gun at Deathstroke is shown before blacking out with a gunshot sound. “Ouch,” everyone said, closing their eyes in shock before opening them again to see Slade wearing an eyepatch. Boomstick: But he's one step closer to his secret dream of becoming a pirate. Question, Wizard: If he has a healing factor, how come he's still missing that eye? Wiz: Well no one knows, Boomstick, but perhaps not even a healing factor can repair the deepest of emotional wounds. “That doesn't make any sense!” Twilight snapped. Boomstick: Oh that's bullshit! Wiz: Despite his new lack of depth perception, Deathstroke remained as skilled as ever. Boomstick: Partially thanks to his favorite gear. I'm talkin' dual machine guns, a sniper rifle, and a super bomb... Wiz: Which is actually just a glorified flashbang grenade with trace bits of Kryptonite. Guess who that's for? Deadpool shows up again. Deadpool: The guy who fought Goku in one of the most biased fanboy videos ever! Wiz: Shut up, Wade! Deadpool: Okay, Ben! Boomstick: This is just getting weird. Spike groaned. “Tell me about it!” Deadpool drops off-screen. (*Cues: Unknown Theme*) Boomstick: So back to the weapons. Deathstroke prefers his sweet Thundercat-style sword and laser-shooting energy lance. Also, he's got an awesome suit of armor, made up of Kevlar and Nth metal. Wiz: Oh look! Yet another fictional alloy that's stronger and lighter than titanium! “No need to get grouchy, Wiz.” lectured Twilight. (the avenger) Wiz:Also, he has armor composed of promethium. Boomstick: Well my shirt is made up of "Boomstick-ium". “Yeah, and my house is made of "Cloud-ium,” snarked Rainbow dash. “My hat is made of "Apple-ium". Joked Applejack. “*giggles* And my party cannon is made of "Party-ium"!” laughed Pinkie Pie. Boomstick: See? I(RAP:We) can make up alloys too, writers. Wiz(Twilight): Actually, Boomstick(Twilight: Rainbow, AJ, Pinkie), promethium is a real thing. Boomstick/RAP: Oh, come on! (by The avenger.) Wiz: Though in real life, it's a chemical used in atomic batteries to power guided missiles and spacecrafts. But in comic book land, it's not that at all. It can absorb energy, is incredibly strong, and is self-regenerative. Boomstick: Wait, so his suit has a healing factor too? So, does like his zipper try and close itself when he wants to take a leak? Because that's horrifying. I mean I remember when I got my junk stuck in the toaster... “Too much information!” screech Rarity with burning cheeks. Nearly blowing everyone's eardrums out. Weapons & Armor Dual machine guns Sniper rifle Promethium sword Energy lance Fires a concussive laser blast Super Bomb A very expensive flash grenade designed to keep Superman at bay Armor Partially composed of Nth metal Slightly enhances strength and speed (*Cues: Teen Titans - Robin vs. Slade*) Wiz: With his impressive skills and arsenal, Deathstroke has defeated dozens of ninjas at once, survived an exploding nuclear submarine, and took down most of the Justice League by himself. Boomstick: He's also really good at push-ups. Shows the footage of Deathstroke in his cell room doing some push-ups. Wiz: Uh...how many push-ups can he do? Boomstick: All of them. “Why do I suddenly have the urge to work out?” Spike mumbled. Wiz: Despite multiple members of the Justice League agreeing he's the best tactician on the planet, Deathstroke is known for violent outbursts of rage when in extreme pain. Depending on who he's fighting, this can make him even more dangerous. “Though i doubt going berserk on somepony is a smart idea…” said Starlight. “Tell that to one of the fighters you girls will be watching in the future.” said Wade as he yet again broke the 4th wall just to mess with our heroes. (DP: can we really call a group of ponies watching tv heroes… wait did i just do a 4th-wall break inside a 4th-wall break!? That's like, 16 walls!) (ME: damn it wade stop destroying my stories walls!) (DP: HA! Like that'll ever happen Ju- Me: Don’t say my fucking name dumbass! DP: fine! Geez i’ll just go and troll some candy colored horses…) Strength & Feats Downed 38 men in under 2 minutes Had his brains shot out, came back to life just hours later Beat most of the Justice League Decisively defeated Batman in a hand-to-hand fight Agile enough to elude Superman Can see at a subatomic level Able to kick down a reinforced steel door with ease Boomstick: "Deathstroke doesn't just solve problems. He terminates them." Deathstroke: I am the thing that keeps you up at night. (picks up the downed Robin) The evil that haunts every dark corner of your mind. I will never rest... and neither will you. “..... well i’m not sleeping tonight.” said Rainbow Dash. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ With that done, Twilight and Starlight both agreed that Deathstroke would get their votes. The others just sat back to watch the upcoming battle. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Wiz: Alright the combatants are set let's end this debate once and for all. Boomstick:It's time for a Death Battle! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Death Battle Scene starts at the set of traffic lights along with vehicles coming in different directions, the camera then cuts to the bus stop with the poster of Deathstroke with a $5,000,010 bounty, then pans next to the bounty poster of Deadpool's with a $5,000,000 bounty. The two mercenaries are observing the poster of the latter. “Oh this is going to be stupid,” muttered Twilight. “More like stupidly AWESOME!” laughed Rainbow Dash. Deadpool: PFFT! What a rip! Seriously, what makes this chump worth 10 bucks more than me? C'mon! I'm me! *chuckles* What!? Am I right? “Ya… sure.” joked Rarity while rolling her eyes. Deathstroke: ... "And it seems Mr. slade agrees,” joked Fluttershy with a giggle. Deadpool: Yeah, I am. I'm pretty sure. “Ya sure?” said Applejack with a chuckle. (Deadpool and Deathstroke realize they are next to each other and somersault backwards.) (*Cues: Strongest Iron Arena- Tekken Tag Tournament 2*) Deathstroke: It's your lucky day. (pulls out his machine guns) I can show you. Deadpool: Oh, boy! A show? (pulls out his machine guns) Can I get popcorn first? I hope they have salt and pepper shakers. I love them to be tasty. “Yum!” said Pinkie Pie likking her lips. Instead of the announcer saying "FIGHT!", Deadpool says it directly at the viewers. Both combatants shoot at each other with their Machine Gun deflecting each one of their bullets. Deadpool: BANG! BANG! BANG! B-B-B-BANG. “He’s not taking this seriously is he?” Twilight asked, her eye twitching. “Nope,” Pinkie said, her eyes narrowing just slightly. In slow motion at Deadpool's side comes 5 bullets, and came another from Deathstroke's side, bouncing off in opposite sides, then it switches to normal speed, where they keep on firing until both combatants run out of ammo. “Well that defies all logic,” muttered Starlight. Deadpool: Uh-Oh! Deadpool drops his machine guns Deathstroke pulls out two ammo clips from his armor to reload, only to realize that Deadpool has disappeared, wondering where he has gone to. Deadpool teleports behind him and kicks him. Deadpool: BAMF! Deadpool beats Deathstroke while continuously teleporting, and Deathstroke drops his machine guns as well. Deadpool: BAMF! Shoryuken! BAMF! “Did he just steal Ryu’s move!?” asked Rainbow Dash, “Eyup,” answered Applejack. Deadpool leaps into the air in slow mo, poised to kick. Deadpool: Check out this rad air! Deathstroke gets kicked in the stomach, and lands on the ground, pulling out his energy lance. Deadpool lands on the ground. Deadpool: A Donatello fan, huh? (takes out his twin katanas) I was always more of a Leonardo guy myself. Although, I think most people would pin me more as a Michelangelo, you know that's them labelling-- “I understood that reference!” said Twilight with a smile when Deadpool mentioned the ninja turtles. ( by SuperSonicHeroes ) Deathstroke hits him with his staff. Deadpool: (distorted groan)I will not be labelled! “Says every SJW ever,” muttered Pinkie Pie. The combatants continue fighting. Deadpool: No touchy-feely! "but i like touchy feely!" whined Pinkie Pie. They fight until Deadpool is knocked far back by Deathstroke's Bo staff, but recovers his landing. Deathstroke goes after Deadpool. Deadpool: BAMF! *teleports* Let's do this! Deadpool continues fighting Deathstroke, but Deathstroke gains the advantage, and he continually hits and beats up Deadpool. Deadpool: (yelps) OW! OW! OH, MY KIDNEY! “Who says that while getting the stuffing kicked out of them?” questioned Starlight on Deadpool’s odd behavior. Deadpool escapes and teleports into the air. Deadpool: Comin' at ya! Deadpool attacks him in midair, but Deathstroke breaks his katanas with his staff. Deadpool teleports away to the side of a road, realizing his swords are broken, but Deathstroke chases him again. Deadpool: I gotta say, It's kinda an honor to get the snot beaten out of me by you of all people. Bruises aside, of course. “Ya keep talkin, that’s sure to help your situation,” snarked Applejack. Deathstroke: Let's see what kind of mark this leaves on you. Deathstroke shoots a laser out of his lance, piercing through Deadpool's stomach and knocking him onto the road and he gets hit by a oncoming truck. “Hissss… ouch,” muttered the group after seeing that string of misfortune. Deadpool: ACK! (his wound heals quickly from his regenerative healing factor) *talks to truck driver* Hey buddy! Don't let me slow you down! “Welp that poor guys scared for life,” joked Spike though he did feel bad for the driver for seeing something like that. Deadpool teleports on top of the truck. Deadpool: Where is that son of a gun? I'm gonna show him what for, I swear--- Deadpool is shot straight through the head. Deadpool(mostly everyone in the group): OOoooh, SHIT! (*Cues: FF7: Advent Children - The Chase of Highway*) Deathstroke is revealed to have his sniper rifle, and he reloads. Deadpool lands on windshield again. Deadpool: *talks to the truck driver again* Look at me, LOOK AT ME! Do not slow down! “Shouldn’t it be the opposite?” Applejack asked confused. “Who cares, it’s just getting good,” Rainbow said excitedly. Deadpool teleports on top of truck again. Deathstroke shoots and misses Deadpool while he keeps teleporting closer, even moving to the other side of the bridge at one point. Deadpool: MISSED ME! *Makes Zoidberg sounds*(Teleporting with each syllable until he's behind Deathstroke) I! HATE! YOUR! DUMBFACE! Deathstroke punches Deadpool. Deadpool: OH, MY KIDNEY! “But he hit you in the face Mr. Deadpool,” corrected Fluttershy. Deadpool is repeatedly punched and kicked until he goes down, Deathstroke then pulls out his sword. Deadpool: Oh! Is it swordfight time? Good thing I carry spares! Deadpool and Deathstroke continue fighting. Deadpool parries Deathstroke. Deadpool: Guess it's cutting time! Deadpool continuously slashes Deathstroke, but his armor and healing factor leave him unscathed. Deathstroke gains the upper hand, shoots Deadpool in the face several times with his pistol, and breaks Deadpool's spare katanas. Deathstroke: If you spent half as much time concentrating as you do talking, perhaps you would be less predictable. Deadpool: OH YOU'RE KIDDING ME! I'M PREDICTABLE!? “Oh no! He's triggered!” screamed Pinkie Pie in fright. (the avenger.) Deadpool reaches and pulls out a boombox, hits play and it plays Marvel vs Capcom 3 - Deadpool's Theme. Deadpool somehow changed his clothes in a split second from his signature red and black jumpsuit to sweats with chains and a DEADPOOL headband. “What…” muttered Twilight. “The…” continued Starlight in a similar State of confusion. “Fuck!?” finished and scream Rarity as everyone (minus Pinkie) tried to process how did he just do that. Deadpool: Don't worry girls! I'm just getting warmed up! “Did he just change the dialogue of the show just to mention us!?” screamed Twilight, her brain nearly giving out because of the strain it was going through trying to understand what was going on. (by the Avenger. Also please don’t get angry if i slightly change more of Deadpool's lines to fit a joke or two.) As he starts dancing around, a special effects surrounds him making it more flashy and people are cheering from the foreground. Deathstroke: *groan* “Ok this is just getting ridiculous,” sighed Twilight. “But again still so awesome!” cheered Rainbow dash as she bobbed her head to the song. Deadpool still breakdances while dodging all of Deathstroke's attacks and hitting him with break dance moves. “He’s styling all over his balls!” screamed Pinkie Pie. “What balls?” asked an innocent Fluttershy. Deadpool: *sings* Splick splick, Dynamite! (moonwalks) He's coming for me, Watch the fight! As Deadpool keeps on dancing, an annoyed Deathstroke shoots the bus' tires with his pistol, causing it to skid and cause hundreds of car crashes. Both combatants stagger. “Oh dear that can’t be good…” whispered Fluttershy. (*Cues: FF7: Advent Children - The Chase of Highway again*) Deadpool teleports just as a car flies towards both him and Deathstroke while Deathstroke dodges it Vans and cars kept crashing. Deadpool, who now is back in his old clothes and had dual pistols, and Deathstroke both leap off two different vehicles towards each other. The truck tips over while the combatants fight in mid-air and then land on the side of the school bus, still in midair. They continue to fight, evenly matched, until Deadpool holds a gun to Deathstroke's head, which ends in Deathstroke wildly slashing Deadpool. “Oh that’s gotta hurt,” hissed out Rarity. Deadpool: OW!OW!OW!MY OTHER LUNG!OW!OW!OW! (Gets impaled through the chest) MY SPLEEN! (Gets shot in the back of the head and sent flying) MY LEG! (Hits a car) OH! IT'S CRAMPING! “WHY IS YOUR LEG CRAMPING A MORE PRESSING MATTER!?” screamed Twilight, finally losing her cool with the the red merc. Deathstroke cuts the car in half causing an explosion. He then realizes his sword is missing after the explosion. Deadpool teleports in front of Deathstroke and stabs him with his own sword. “......how?” asked Starlight. Wondering how did the merc with the mouth get the sword without Deathstroke noticing. Deadpool: Pop-Pop, waton Deathstroke... (Truck towards into Deadpool) God Dammit! (Gets hit) OH MY THIRD LUNG! “Huh well what do you know? A flaming semi truck,” mussed Twilight with a small hint of mirth in her voice. Truck explodes, and extreme effects like a Michael Bay's film. An unconscious Deathstroke is seen, as is Deadpool, who is unfazed by the damage, and he gets up revealing that he's missing an arm. “It still gets to me that he can just shrug that kind of damage off like nothing,” said Applejack. Rainbow Dash just rolled her eye’s trying to she wasn't impressed (DP: she was.) “oh please! It’s not that impressive heck if i was in that situation i would-!” “Be laying on the ground dying.” Interrupted Fluttershy of all ponies, and saying it with a dry tone to bute! Much to the shock of her friends. “... oh damn!” yelled Pinkie Pie. Deadpool: Well, that escalated quickly. You might want to lay low for a couple of days... you are, pretty much responsible for a mass murder. Deadpool puts his limb back on while Deathstroke, who is missing his mask, gained consciousness with his own sword in his chest. Deathstroke: *woozy groan* Deadpool: *laughs* (mocking) It's a Deathstroke kabob! *laughs* While he was pointing at Deathstroke mockingly, he just realized that he put in his leg on the upper arm and his arm attached to the thigh by mistake. “EW.” said Rarity in disgust. “Pfft! Now thats funny,” laughed Rainbow Dash. Deadpool: Whoops! Hang on, give me a sec. Oh this is going to hurt! (groaning) Deadpool attaches his limbs in the correct places while Deathstroke pulls his sword out of his chest, then struggles to get up. Deathstroke: *pained groan* Deadpool: Whoa, hold on! You heal fast too? I got something special for that! (*Cues: Sword Art Online - Swordland Theme*) As Deathstroke finally gets on his feet, Deadpool pulls out his last sword. Deadpool: Carbonadium Sword! Murdering all your pesky Wolverines and Saberteeth since 2012! Good year for cinema! “It truly was,” agreed Pinkie Pie with a nod. The combatants fight once more, once again evenly matched. While their swords are locked Deadpool points his pistol at Deathstroke's face. Deadpool: (to the fourth wall warning for a graphic scene) All the children in the audience (that includes you, flame breath), cover your eyes! “Why should- HEY!!” yelled Spike as Twilight covered his eye’s. “Thank you, Twibright.” thanked Deadpool. “It’s Twilight!” screamed a annoyed Twilight. “Pfft that’s such a dumb name… anyway back to the show.” said Deadpool Deadpool shoots through his own wrist and nails Deathstroke in his good eye. Deathstroke staggers while swinging his sword wildly. Deadpool teleports behind Deathstroke and cuts him, and Deathstroke falls. (*Screen blacks out*) Deathstroke: (deep voice) And the moral of the story is… “What the-” muttered most of the group because they were sure Deadpool was the one who won this battle. Deadpool reveals himself puppeteering Deathstroke's head. “OH SICK!” screamed Rainbow Dash while everyone else was turning green from seeing Deadpool using Slade’s head as a toy. Deadpool: (normal voice) *gasps* Deadpool wins! YAY! Explosions are heard, while Deadpool sings Macarena while replacing two lines. Deadpool (replacing lines): This is totally racist. HEYYY CHIMICHANGAAAAAAA! (Chomping Noise) Announcer: K.O! While Deadpool is driving a sweet ride, on that hood, it has Deathstroke's dismembered head as a hood ornament. “Well so much for respecting the dead,” muttered Starlight with a flat look. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Results (*Cues: CJuicy - Macarena (Moombathon Remix)*) Deadpool appears on-screen. Deadpool: (faking) Oh! Oh, YouTube comments. Oh, I see you rolling. Oh, you're hating. Oh, it wounds me so... (unfazed) it doesn't at all. Explain how I beat this asshole. “Wow he’s even a smartass with the audience,” said Applejack said with a flat look. Wiz: Don't tell me how to do my job. *clears throat* This was a surprisingly even match. Though Deathstroke was the superior fighter of the two and had the better armor, Deadpool could take all his punishment and give just as much. “True,” everyone agreed. Boomstick: Deathstroke's smart, so normally he would have no problem predicting his opponent's moves, but Deadpool is so unpredictable, not even Taskmaster, or sometimes even himself for that matter, can keep up with whatever he's doing. “There was just no possible way to plan ahead for him,” Twilight summarized. Wiz: Unfortunately for Deathstroke, he didn't have the means to put Deadpool down for good. And while Deathstroke's healing factor was perfect for repairing damage, Deadpool's trumped his by being capable of replacing entire organs at a much faster rate. Sometimes the original isn't always the best. Boomstick: Deadpool is just a cut above the rest. Wiz: The winner is... Deadpool pops in victoriously to finish the last sentence. Deadpool: Spider-Man! I mean Deadpool! Shit! Everyone laughed at this and a few even fell off the couch laughing. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ No trailer for this one. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Before the ponies and dragon could move, the world froze and turned to gray as Deadpool walked into the scene as he held a clipboard in his hands. Turning to the viewers, he said, “I’m just gonna make this quick. So after the battle, all the girls and dragon boy cheered as they got cool things from the box. Naturally they were of yours truly so that’s bound to make anyone happy.” He flips a page over and says, They talk about the results, the awesome fight and how awesome I am. Thanks Skittle pony. Now onto the Ending scene hit it!” ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ later that night, ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ It was nighttime as Twilight tried to get some rest but it proved to be difficult. The craziness and insanity that was called Deadpool was making her toss and turn in her bed as she tried to calm down. “Twibright,” a voice said slowly. The princess of friendship didn’t want to listen to anything. She just wanted to forget about the illogical superhero and sleep. “Twibright,” the voice said slightly louder. “What?” Twilight said sleepily as she opened her eyes. She thought it was Starlight asking for something or Spike telling her she got a letter from the princess. What she wasn’t expecting was a familiar red and black suited hero to be laying beside her merely a foot away from her. “Hiiii,” Deadpool said, waving to the princess happily. That night, Ponyville found out that Twilight could use the Canterlot voice to wake up all the residents and break all the windows at the same time. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ CHAPTER END! NEXT TIME KIRBY VS MAJIN BUU.
Kirby VS Majin BuuWe find most of our heroes gathered in the castle. They had hoped to see another episode of Death Battle, but when Rainbow Dash and the rest of the group entered the castle they quickly noticed both the eerie silence and the absence of Twilight, Spike, and Starlight. “Uhhhh girls? Is it just me or does the place seem kinds empty to y'all?” asked Applejack as they made their way down the hall leading to entertainment room, or the super awesome room of fight, and snacks…. Rainbow and Pinkie’s words not her’s. “I agree Applejack it is quite ominous and is it just me or do i hear… crying?” asked Rarity as she and the rest of the group made their way down towards the their destination. Once the group made it towards the sound which lead them to one of the many rooms. Opening the door, the small group of ponies found their friend Twilight on the ground crying with Spike and Starlight comforting her. This confused the girls as Applejack asked, “What’s going on here?” “That’s what I’d like to know,” a gentle voice said from behind the five ponies. The small group of friends turned around and were greeted by Princess Celestia, Luna and Prince Blueblood stand there with confused expressions. “Your highness,” the ponies, minus Starlight and Twilight, said as they bowed respectfully. “Come now, none of that,” Celestia said as the ponies rose back to their hooves. “Now can some explain what’s going on?” Celestia asked, concerned for her former student’s condition. “We just found her like this, Celestia,” Rarity said truthfully. “Also if I may be bold to ask, why are you and the prince here?” Rarity asked, slightly glaring at the prince. “To answer your question Miss Rarity, I came with my aunts to see this show they’ve been going on about. But most importantly, I wanted to see my old friend since we haven’t talked in awhile,” Blueblood said, looking over Rarity to see Twilight still crying. “Wait, you and Twilight were friends?” Rainbow Dash asked, shocked by this. “We’re still friends, we used to be playmates when we were younger,” Blueblood said as another sob escaped from Twilight. “This reminds me of the time Twilight thought you were going to send her to magic kindergarten,” Blueblood said causing Celestia to giggle at the memory. “I must say, I’m a bit surprised,” Rarity said, looking at the prince with a neutral look. “Why’s that Rarity? What’s got you surprised?” Luna said, taking a step forward to look at the group. The very next moment Twilight out an audible sob as Pinkie hopped towards her sad friend. “Well it’s just that when we met at the Gala, Prince Blueblood was…,” Rarity began to say as said prince sighed. “I know Miss Rarity, you don’t have to remind me. It was a bad day for me and I’m generally not much of a social butterfly, for that I apologize for how i acted that day,” Blueblood said remorsefully, bowing to the fashionista. Rarity stared at the prince with her mouth opened slightly, unable to form any words. It took her a second to remember that the princesses and her friends were watching her so she cleared her throat and said, “Apology accepted, Prince Blueblood.” At that moment Spike popped up between the two, giving the Prince a dark glare. “I'm watching you…” He whispered darkly. “Well that’s fine and dandy but can we get back at the matter at hoof. Twi’s still crying over there,” Applejack said, pointing at the downed mare as Pinkie tried making funny faces to cheer her up. “What can we do? It doesn’t seem like Pinkie is having much luck,” Fluttershy said, seeing that the lavender princess still hasn’t moved. She then saw Celestia walk towards her fellow princess as Pinkie stopped doing Pinkie things. “Don’t worry Pinkie. I know just what to do,” Celestia said, getting close to the crying mare. “Oh Oh. Are you gonna use a spell? Maybe a potion to make all the sadness go away?” Pinkie said, hoping place. “No, just an old family technique,” Celestia said, standing next to Twilight as she raised her hoof. The group watched with baited breathe at what Celestia would do. *SMACK* And were surprised to see the sun princess smack Twilight upside the head. “Owowow. Who hit me?” Twilight said, jumping to her hooves and looking around. “It was Celestia,” Spike and Starlight said simultaneously. “Wait, Celestia hit me?” Twilight yelled, wincing in pain. “I’m sorry Twilight but you were crying for some reason. I had to do something to snap you out of it,” Celestia said sadly. “Oh, thank you Celestia. So did you and Luna come by for another episode?” Twilight asked, walking with her former teacher to the hall. “Yes and we also brought an old friend of yours,” Celestia said, motioning towards Blueblood. Twilight’s eyes went wide as she ran towards Blueblood and hugged him. Blueblood was caught off guard but returned the hug a moment later as the girls watched with smiles on their faces. “Oh It’s good to see you, Blue,” Twilight said happily. “I could say the same to you, Princess Twilight,” Blueblood said teasingly as he released the hug. “While this is touching and heartwarming, I say we go to the viewing room to watch the episode,” Luna said, walking towards the viewing room. “I agree. After hearing about this show for months, I’ve been interested in seeing it myself,” Blueblood said, following Luna as the rest of the group walked. Once in the room, everyone took a seat as Twilight levitated the remote to her. She was just about to press play when Rarity said, “I just thought of something. If you’re here with us then who’s watching over Canterlot?” ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Meanwhile in Canterlot~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ “This injustice will not stand. I will not sit by and let the people suffer by the hands of these foul creatures!” screamed Thor (pony form.) as he sat on Celestia’s throne. “Um sir. We appreciate that you’re helping the princess with the day court but don’t you think your taking the situation a bit too far,” a nervous guard said as he held a spear in his hooves. “Ya you're blowing the matter out of proportion,” agreed another guard as they tried to calm down their princess’s mate “No! These foul creatures have been eating the crops of the loyal ponies of this land and I won’t stand for it!” Thor yelled, stomping his hoof on the ground and making the castle shake from the shock. “Sir! It's just a gopher problem at a local farm!” scream the first Guard. “WE STRIKE AT WITHIN THE HOUR!” Thor yelled, spreading his wings while raising his hammer into the air. As he did that, lightning seemed to come out of nowhere behind the pony god of thunder. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Back with the Gang~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ “...... ya everything is fine,” said a confident Celestia, and with that out of the way everyone got in their seats and Twilight pressed play. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ (*Cues: Invader - Peter Scaturro & Bryan Kei Mantia*) Wiz: Imagine right now, what does the apocalyptic destroyer of worlds look like? “Tirek?” Twilight mused. “A comic book villain made real?” asked Spike. “A mad cult leader going back in time?” added Starlight. “A mad, tyrant king with horrible fashion sense?” said Rarity in fear. “A monster made of pears?” asked Applejack with a raised brow? “An ultimate storm that can't be controlled?” Rainbow Dash with a hint of fear. “A *gulps* d-d-drag-gon god who eats ponies?” whimpered Fluttershy while hugging Doomguy Plushie. “A party pooper?” gasped out Pinkie Pie. (all but twilight's line was by the avenger) “Something from our past,” muttered Celestia while Luna gently patted her shoulders. “Someone who could hurt my aunt’s and cousin’s,” muttered Blue Blood. Boomstick: Stop thinking, because you're wrong. It's these pudgy pink terrors. Kirby, Nintendo's floating puff-ball of never-ending cheer and dreams. “Awww~ He's so cute~! I bet he wouldn't hurt anypony.” cooed Fluttershy. Wiz: And Majin Buu, the most vicious monster in the Dragonball Universe. “Seriously!? Those weird-looking blobs of pink!?” yelled a surprised Rainbow Dash. “AHEM!” Pinkie coughed. “You don't count, you're not evil!” Dash retorted. Boomstick: He's Wiz and I'm Boomstick. Wiz: And it's our job to analyze their weapons, armor, and skills to find out who would win... a Death Battle. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Kirby (*Cues: Kirby - King Dedede Battle/Gourmet Race (Orchestral Remix)*) Wiz: Over a thousand years ago, an epic war waged throughout the universe. The legendary Star Warriors battled against the vile Nightmare for the freedom of everything that ever was. Ultimately, good prevailed, but at the cost of many, many lives. Yet one infant Star Warrior escaped the carnage, destined to awaken a millennium later and save the galaxy. His name... is Kirby... (*Record scratches*) Kirby: HIII! (*Cues: Green Greens - Kirby Super Star Ultra*) “So adorable,” squealed Fluttershy as she gushed over Kirby. Boomstick: Wait, what?! The cute cuddly pink puffball who lives in Happyland? Are you sure you're reading the right back story? “I have to agree with Mr. Boomstick on this one.” agreed Blue Blood. “Trust me Blue Blood you won’t be saying that for long…” muttered Rarity. Wiz: Yes. He crash landed on Popstar, the most confusingly-shaped planet ever… Twilight's eye twitched upon seeing the star-shaped planet. “How would gravity even work on a planet like that?!” “Twilight please we’ve been over this….” sighed Spike as he felt his mother figure was going to go on a rant again. “She still questioning every little thing?” asked Blue Blood. “Eyup,” answered Spike, Popping the p. “Heh seems like things never change,” laughed Blue Blood. Causing Twilight to blush in embarrassment.. Wiz:...and has been defending the kingdom of Dream Land ever since. Boomstick: But look at him! He's just so adorable and cuddly. He couldn't hurt a fly. “He seems more like he would rather be playing then actually fight anyone,” said Luna. Wiz: Kirby is a ravenous cannibal who thrives on the blood of mass murder. “..... bullshit,” said Rainbow Dash with a flat look. (we see see a field that is filled with the skeletal remains of a few cows.) Tiff : Did you do this? “I highly doubt he did that,” said Rarity. Not believing that kirby would something like that. (DM: she’s right you know.) (*Cues: Kirby Triple Deluxe - Kirby Fighters (Kracko) Boomstick (Pinkie and Rainbow Dash): Holy shit! Background Age: Unknown, 200 years pre-maturity Height: 8 in/20 cm Weight: Likely under 10 oz/283 g Species: Unknown Infant-like and cheerful demeanor A Star Warrior Citizen of Dream Land Wiz: He may not look it, but Kirby is a powerhouse. He possesses incredible strength, speed, durability and an arsenal stranger than an average day in Florida. “Well looks can be deceiving,” said Celestia. “Ya like cute little Flurry Heart being as powerful as a fully grown unicorn,” agreed Twilight. Boomstick: His trademark power is his inhale ability, which sucks almost everything in with a powerful vortex. With it, he can clear out everything from a quick meal to an acre of forest in a matter of seconds. “Sounds like Celestia when she's at an all you eat pastry buffet, she's banned from all of them by now I wager.” said Luna jokingly. Causing her sister to glare at her. “Luna! I am not banned from all you can eat buffets!” cried Celestia with her cheeks burning red. “Then why do the Mayor of Fillydelphia keep rejecting you attending their annual pie eating contest?” asked Twilight with a amused Smile. “Because I judged the mayor's wife's pie to taste like bull manure ten years ago.” defended Celestia. “And the 'No Princesses Allowed' signs I keep seeing outside those all you can eat places?” asked her sister. “That's Blueblood trying to keep me to my diet.” muttered Celestia. Blueblood gave his aunt a bright smile. “Indeed! Auntie needs to lay back on the amount of pastries she eats, they are bad for her blood pressure. Here Auntie, have some celery!” he said as he handed her some celery. Celestia glared at the offending piece of food. “ ...You are sooo going to regret this when my diet period ends.” she growled. Blueblood just gave her a shrug. “By then it will be my successor's problem so I call it a win!” “Ha! i was wrong about you after all nephew!” laughed Luna while patting her Nephew’s back. “Indeed... You are still a brutish dullard however.” laughed Rarity before giving him a playful punch on the shoulder. “And still scream like a girl.” Spike whispered, earning a few snickers from the group. (thank you Staadnauthursil) Wiz: Plus, Kirby's body is malleable, allowing him to stretch his mouth and inhale larger objects, though he does have trouble wrapping his mouth around extremely large and heavy things. Boomstick: LIKE MY DIC-! “DON'T YOU DARE FINISH THAT SENTENCE YOU FUCKING MULE!!!” screeched Rarity causing everyone else back away from the enraged unicorn. (thank ya Avenger) Wiz: -KIRBY weighs practically nothing, allowing him to inflate his body and fly like a sentient balloon. He can traverse the skies, and outer space, by using his own personal vehicle, the Warp Star. “That’s a sweet ride,” cheered Rainbow Dash as she got a good look at the warp Star. “Now that beats flying by magic,” whistled Starlight impressed with the pink hero’s ride. Boomstick: Which he can call up at any time on speed dial. No, really, he uses a cell phone. Somebody get me that number! I tried 1-800-PINK-RIDE, but it was something else.... “Oh… my…” Fluttershy blushed. Wiz: The Warp Star is Kirby's primary means of transportation through the universe, and can travel at speeds faster than light. It is forged of Kirby's own energy, so, while delicate, should it be destroyed, Kirby can easily create a new one on his own, making the cell phone kind of pointless. “I have to agree with Wiz on this one, that is pretty useless,” muttered Twilight, Boomstick: I'd be happy to take that phone off his hands, though I'm a bit iffy on standing anywhere near that star-driving balloon marshmallow. Look at him! (shows a scene of Kirby sucking up and enemy.) He doesn't even care! He's a monster! “Ok maybe they wearn’t bullshiting,” said a surprised Rainbow Dash. Arsenal Inhale Copy Ability Warp Star Flight Air Bullet Slide Kick Can Summon Helpers (*Cues: Super Smash Bros. Melee - Fountain of Dreams) Wiz: It's about to get even worse: guess what just happened to that poor creature? See, when Kirby swallows a victim, they don't exactly die. Turns out Kirby's stomach, is, in fact, an entirely separate and endless dimension of reality. “Just like my sister on cake day!” laughed Luna get some laughter from the rest of the group and a glare from said sister. Boomstick: So he never feels full. Talk about getting your money's worth at an all-you-can-eat-buffet, though. Luna was yet again going to say another joke but a seething death glare from Celestia (whose mane was now on fire) stopped her in her tracks. Wiz: Kirby can trap thousands of victims in this abyss. Then, he can actually enter his own stomach dimension and draw from his captive's power using his copy ability. Boomstick: How in the hell?! Does he, like, swallow himself? Wiz: He likely projects an astral image of himself within the dimension, which can act on the physical plain. “I… guess that makes sense?” Twilight mused to herself. Boomstick: Sure... Anyway, with the Copy ability, Kirby's form and power change based on what he's eating. By devouring an enemy with a mallet, he can become Hammer Kirby, a master of whack-a-mole! “Hmmmm i remember young sunset being good at that game… and anything that had to do with a hammer,” mused Blue Blood causing Celestia to smile at the memory. Wiz: Fire Kirby can unleash a torrent of flame and survive all manner of heat. Ice Kirby can freeze his foes solid. Wheel Kirby is fast enough to drive around the entire kingdom of Dream Land in under two seconds, though who knows how he can see where he's going. “Hahaha! He looks like a pink sonic when he’s in wheel form,” laughed Rainbow Dash. Boomstick: There's Mike Kirby, who singing talent is apparently so awful, everything that hears it dies. (We see Mike Kirby sing, causing several monsters to explode) “OH SWEET CELESTIA MAKE IT STOP!!” Spike screamed, covering his ears. “It’s worse than the time auntie Luna tried to sing modern music!” cried Blue Blood. “Hey!” yelled a ticked off Luna getting a laugh from her sister. “Sucks being on the receiving end huh?” laughed the sun princess. (*Cues: Arena Battle - Kirby's Return to Dreamland*) Boomstick: Like Wiz at karaoke night with the ladies. “Or Twilight when she scares away her dates,” Rainbow said, grinning. Wiz (and Twilight): Yea...HEY! (Thank you Avenger for the joke above) Everypony chuckled at this. Boomstick: Stone Kirby is nearly indestructible, and Sword Kirby is a master with a blade, he can even fire sword beams, which can cut through anything without mercy. DAMN! “I wanna sword like that!” Spike smiled. (*Cues: Final Battle EX - Kirby's Return to Dreamland*) Boomstick: But that's not all, he can pour a ton of energy into the blade, and make it grow into the powerful Ultra Sword. “That’s one powerful sword,” Rarity said as Blueblood nodded silently. Wiz: Fighter Kirby is a master martial artist, and by inhaling a Miracle Fruit, he becomes Hyper Nova Kirby, capable of devouring worlds. Last, but not least, by absorbing his own Warp Star, Kirby can create his ultimate weapon, the Star Rod, a magical staff powered by dreams and capable of destroying evil, and most of the moon. "WHAT!" screamed Luna in a primal rage but before she could do any harm her sister and Twilight were able to calm her down. Boomstick: The only problem with Kirby's copy ability is, they don't last. One bad hit, and there it goes. “So he's kind of a glass cannon?” Starlight added. Copy Abilities Sword Hammer Fighter Fire Ice Wheel Mike Hypernova Star Rod (*Cues: Boss Battle - Kirby's Return to Dreamland*) Wiz: But even without an added ability, Kirby is remarkably tough. He's powerful enough to crack a planet in half, fast enough to run on water, and strong enough to throw a monster thirty times his size, on a frying pan, all the way to the sun, circle the burning star, and return to Kirby's feet, with the perfectly cooked monster. “...WHAT!?” everyone screamed at that bit of info. “HOW?” Twilight, Starlight and Celestia said simultaneously. Boomstick: I think that might be the most ridiculous feat we've ever seen on Death Battle. But he's not just strong, he's so tough that he was barely fazed after being crushed under thousands of tons of pressure, and effortlessly survived an explosion massive enough to eclipse the entire world. “Wow that little guy is one tough guy,” said a amazed Rainbow Dash. Wiz: He's achieved all of this despite being only eight inches tall. Boomstick: See, it's not the size of the monster, it's how he throws a fucking humongus frying pan into the sun and back! “We're gonna keep comin' back ta that, aren't we?” muttered Applejack. Wiz: Well, Kirby does have one crucial flaw: he's a baby, and has yet to fully mature as a Star Warrior. “A BABY!?” everyone screamed, both surprise and terrified at the fact that one of the most dangerous creatures they have just heard about (and because of this show the list just keeps growing.) was just a baby. (thank ya shinigamisparda) Boomstick: Yeah, he's not too bright, so he's not gonna be whipping up any genius strategies mid-fight. Fortunately he's powerful enough to get away with it. Kirby is the most adorably terrifying thing in the world! Everyone's thoughts immediately turned to Flurry Heart and couldn't help but shiver at the similarities. “I’m worried for my cousin Cadence now,” muttered BlueBlood, hoping his Cousin would be ok. Strengths and Feats Cracked Planet Popstar in half Punched a hole through the Earth Threw Popon to the sun Obliterated Popstar in manga Destroyed Nova, who is planet-sized Defeated Nightmare and Dark Matter Redirected a meteor using simple cannonballs Kirby does his traditional ending dance while the Kirby Dance music from Kirby's Return to Dreamland plays. “Aw~ so cute!” Fluttershy giggled. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Once the analysis was done, everyone could agree that they were amazed by the infant star warrior.e “My bits are on the mini pink Celestia,” Luna exclaimed loudly. “LUNA,” Celestia yelled as the others snickered at the sisters. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Majin Buu (*Cues: Evil Buu - Dragon Ball Z*) Wiz: True terror is something unpredictable, unstoppable, and dreadfully deceiving. “Just like every comic book villain,” Rainbow Dash said, munching on some popcorn. “Or like the bad guys we fought in the past,” Fluttershy said quietly, eating a chocolate bar as her friends, even the princesses, agreed. Boomstick: A perfect description for the pink monstrosity known as Majin Buu. Majin Buu is a fat, pink, man-sized baby thing with enough power to destroy a planet. And I assume he's made of some sort of bubble gum. Probably Big League Chew. “MMMmmhhhnnn, gum,” Pinkie said, her mouth watering at the thought of gum that size. Wiz: Buu has existed since the dawn of time, but was only discovered five million years ago by the nefarious wizard, Bibidi. Bibidi released Majin Buu on a helpless universe, intent on destroying everything. After annihilating hundreds of planets, Bibidi set his sights on Earth, sending Buu ahead in a sealed capsule just waiting to be released. “Why do people always have to mess with ancient evil?” muttered Twilight with a face hoof. Boomstick: Buuuuut then Bibidi got himself killed before he could get to Earth and release the pink terror. But no worries, the weird lizard-wizard-thing had a back-up plan in the form of a magic clone named Babidi. Pinkie blinked. “Wait, clone? I thought he was his-” Boomstick: Yes, clone, not son, that was a mis-translation. “Oh.” said Pinkie Pie. Boomstick: So, Bibidi, Babidi and Buu. (*sings*) Put 'em all together and what do you get? Wiz: A Disney lawsuit… “HA!” Laughed Pinkie Pie. Background Age: Immemorial Height: (Fat) Approx. 6ft/183 cm, (Kid) Approx. 5ft/152 cm Race: Majin Aliases: Mr. Buu, Boo of Pure Evil, Majin of Destruction Originally thought to be created by Bibibdi Friends with Super Janemba Boomstick: Anyway, the doppelganger Babidi set out on a quest to recover Buu and complete Bibidi's plan. Wiz: Eventually, Babidi found Buu and opened the monster's shell. BUUUT turns out there was a... slight defect and Buu was... uummm… “Unstable?” Twilight asked, shrugging. “Crazy?” Spike asked, shrugging. “Scary?” Fluttershy asked, using Doomguy plushie as a shield. Boomstick: A complete idiot! Majin Buu: OHOHOHOHOHOOO! (*Cues: Buu's Theme - Dragon Ball Z*) (*Majin Buu hums and stretches his body after being sealed.*) Dabura: Is this the... The great Majin Buu? Are you positive? “Buu seems more harmless than dangerous ta me,” Applejack said, not believing he could be that much of a threat. “That's what we were saying about Kirby, then we saw what he can do,” Starlight said, pointing out how powerful the pink star warrior was. “Good point, but still…” Applejack began to say before Wiz cut her off. Wiz: Buu is the equivalent of a man-sized toddler with the power of a billion nuclear warheads. (*Buu kicks Dabura across land and into a cliff*) “WOAH!” everyone said, shocked at how powerful that kick was. “I take it all back,” Applejack (*Cues: Pink Demon - Dragon Ball Z*) Boomstick: Talk about your terrible twos. Buu has a ridiculous arsenal for killing worlds: he can fly, shoot lasers, destroy cities by breathing too hard, and can fire a beam from his head-penis that can turn people into candy. “Really?! I wonder if-” Pinkie said before Starlight and Twilight grab her hooves and glare at her. “Don't you fucking dare!” Twilight and Starlight said simultaneously. “Iwasn'tplanningtolookforaspellthatcanturnpeopleintocandy!PinkiePromise!” Pinkie said really fast and in one breathe. (Thanks to The Avenger to the jokes above) Wiz: Boomstick, it's not his genitals, its his.... well... actually, I don't know what it is. Which brings me to his strangest ability, his whole body in general. Whatever he's made of, its magic in nature. Buu's whole body can be pulled, stretched, or even ripped apart with no negative effects. Boomstick: He can even pull entire slabs from his belly and use his own flesh as a weapon. AAHH, this is just getting stranger and stranger. “Agreed. That is a rather strange ability,” Blueblood said, feeling a bit uncomfortable seeing Buu ripping off body fat like that. Everyone else was either shuddering or turning a bit green from that image. Wiz: Yes, and he apparently does feel pain, though it seems to please him. Like some sort of combat masochist. Fortunately, his body can regenerate almost instantly. Boomstick: He can be blasted to smithereens and reform himself in seconds. He's practically invincible. Arsenal Chocolate Beam Flight Gack Body Manipulation Regeneration Absorption Buu Rocket Super Breath Mending Beam Innocence Express Vanishing Beam Finger Beam Vice Shout Planet Burst Wiz: Buu can mimic any Ki attack after seeing it in action only once, this is how he learned Goku's Kamehameha wave, and Supreme Kai's Instantaneous Movement teleport. “To be able to use an attack after one look,” Applejack said, “To think something like Buu can be that powerful,” Rarity said, getting a bit pale. Wiz: But his copying prowess goes even further, he can physically absorb other people, transforming his mind and body. Buu: YES! COME TO ME! (absorbs Gotenks and Piccolo) Fluttershy raced to the bathroom quick and the group heard the sound of her throwing up. The others were faring a bit better than her but not by much as they too felt sick just by watching that. (*Cues: Majin Theme - Dragon Ball Z*) Boomstick (Spike and Rainbow Dash): That's the most disturbing thing I've ever seen. “No kidding,” Starlight said, shuddering as she tried to forget what just happened. “I think I’m gonna have nightmares tonight,” Twilight said, shuddering as well. Next to her Blueblood was curled up in a ball, shivering. “Can't sleep, Buu will eat me…” Wiz: Each version of Buu has a different personality, based on whom he's absorbed. Fat Buu is cheerful and childlike, due to absorbing the carefree Grand Supreme Kai, but then there's his original, and most dangerous form, Kid Buu. Boomstick: He's so tiny! He's like a little kid in MC Hammer pants! This can't seriously be his deadliest form. “After what we saw, I’m doubting that,” Rainbow said, looking at the smaller Buu. “I believe we can all agree with that,” Luna said, getting shaky nods from everyone in the room. Wiz: Kid Buu is pure rage incarnate. (*Cues: Panic - Dragon Ball Z*) Kid Buu screams out loud and pounds on his chest. Wiz: He can get so angry, he's capable of tearing holes in the fabric of reality just by screaming. "He can what takes ponies like Starswirl years to do by just throwing a tantrum?" whispered Twilight in complete horror. Boomstick: Or, if he's fed up with whatever planet he's on, he'll just blow it to bits with his Planet Burst attack. Everyone’s eyes grew wide at the size of the Planet Burst attack. They didn’t want to be on the receiving end of that and even the elder princesses felt that they wouldn’t be able to stop that attack. Wiz: In a universe chock full of planet busters, Majin Buu is one of the strongest, he's destroyed entire galaxies by systematically obliterating each planet one by one over time. “YIKES.” said everyone in shock and fear. (*Cues: Bad News - Dragon Ball Z*) Boomstick: He's defeated most of Dragonball Z's most powerful characters, including Vegeta, Gotenks, and Gohan. “He beat Vegeta?” the seven who know of the character yelled, shocked that someone as tough as the saiyan prince could lose to this monster. Wiz: He one-shot the king of the demon realm, and easily bested the Supreme Kais. Boomstick: Who are like the gods of other gods, so needless to say, Buu is pretty frickin' strong. “Buu’s powerful enough to fight gods” Celestia said as she and Luna felt dread at this. (*Cues: Kid Buu Theme - Dragon Ball Z*) Wiz: But he's also extremely cocky, caring little about strategy or personal safety, and while his regenerative ability seems to make him indestructible, Buu is one of the only Dragonball characters whose body has been visibly affected by ordinary bullets. Boomstick: And while being able to destroy planets, his body's not tough enough to take the explosion, forcing him to regenerate from a mass of pink particles. “At least there’s that but something tells me it’s not enough to stop him,” Starlight said, somewhat glad that he can still be hurt. Strengths and Feats Unprecedented amount of combat experience One-shot Dabura Ripped apart space and time Eradicated the human race in seconds Destroyed hundreds of planets Defeated Gotenks, Vegeta, and Gohan Survived a battle with Vegito Wiz: Despite having the mind of a child and the body of Play-Doh, Majin Buu might just be the deadliest villain in Dragonball history. “No kidding,” Rainbow said, not wanting to mess with Buu. Majin Buu: Me get big MAAAAAAAAAAADDDDD! Buu screams, causing a massive explosion of energy. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Everyone would say that they were afraid of Buu. Even the Princesses would admit that they feared what that thing would do if it even showed up in their homeland. No one was gonna vote for it out of dread. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Commercial (*Cues: Yacker's Plea - Sonic Colors*) Ben Singer (Wiz's voice actor) walks towards a stack of boxes of Super Saiyan God Goku chibi figure and he picks one up “Oh look! Goku figurines!” cheered Pinkie Pie with a huge Smile. “But why is his hair red?” asked Fluttershy. “And who’s that nerd?” asked Rainbow Dash while pointing at ben. Ben: Super Saiyan God Goku?! He's my best friend. “Wait, Goku has a god mode?” asked Starlight. “Why wasn’t that shown in his battle?” asked Applejack. "No clue," stated Twilight. Super Saiyan God Goku Chibi Figure: Then why do you hate me, buster? (Ben looks around) Ben: What? “Did that little Goku just talk?” Twilight asked, looking at the screen. Super Saiyan God Goku Chibi Figure: My Super Saiyan God form will eat Superman for lunch, like a delicious muffin. That's right, I'm talking to you, Ben Singer! Bet you can't even sing. “So the guy’s name Ben,” Celestia thinking it sounded a bit odd. “Pfft, what a nerd,” muttered Luna. (Shocked, Ben throws the chibi figure to the garbage bin. But the chibi figure teleports back to the table using Instant Transmission. Ben slowly looks up to the table.) Super Saiyan God Goku Chibi Figure: We see them, Ben. They're very angry. We see the comments. We see everything..... (his head spins for a few second until he stops.) “This is getting creepy,” whispered Spike, getting a bit freaked out. Ben: I don't want you anymore. Super Saiyan God Goku Chibi Figure: Wha- (Ben stuffs the chibi figure back in the box. You can hear the muffled scream of the chibi figure.) “Good call,” said Blue Blood with a nod. Ben: Merry Christmas. “What the heck's a Christmas?” asked Rainbow Dash. “Don’t know… sounds like a made up holiday to me,” Applejack said with a shrug. “It's actually Earth’s version of Hearths Warming.” Twilight explained. Boomstick: You too can own one of these totally-not-possessed limited-edition Pop Final figures, exclusively at funimation.com. Click the link below and use the code dbzscrewattack for 10% off, only at funimation.com. But right now, it's time for a DEATH BATTLE! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Wiz: Alright the combatants are set. Let's end this debate once and for all. Boomstick: It's time for a Death Battle! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Death Battle (*Cues: Kirby Triple Deluxe - Intro Theme*) On a bright day in the Kingdom of Dreamland, in what appears to be Green Greens, a multitude of citizens are enjoying the good day. Some Waddle Dees are walking around, a Bonkers is sleeping, a Knuckle Joe is simply standing around and two Waddle Doos are dancing with each other. “That looks like such a peaceful place,” Blueblood said, liking how the residents were having their own fun without a care in the world. Then suddenly, a pink beam is blasted from the sky at one of the Waddle Doos, turning it into a piece of cake. “And the moments gone,” Blueblood deadpanned. The camera moves up to reveal the source of the laser attack. Majin Buu: HELLO! “Hi!” said Pinkie with a wave. “Pinkie! No waving at the evil monster!” said Twilight with a scolding tone. (*Cues: Kirby Triple Deluxe - Moonlight Capital*) Buu then strikes one of the Waddle Dees with his Chocolate Beam, which sends the rest of the citizens running around and fleeing in panic. Buu continues to fire Chocolate Beams left and right, hitting multiple targets before shooting one at the camera. It then returns to Buu floating mid-air, laughing and cheering at all of the things he's turned to sweets which are hovering near him. Buu: Me gonna eat you up! “That's horrible….”muttered Celestia, seeing all those lives ended. “I know….. All of those calories!” cried Rarity getting some flat looks from her friends. Buu picks up one of the nearby chocolate bars and throws it into the air in an attempt to catch it in his mouth, but before it gets there a strong wind pulls it and all of the food away from him. (*Cues: Kirby Triple Deluxe - Masked Dedede*) The camera moves to the source of the wind, which would be the hero of Dreamland, Kirby, riding his Warp Star and using his inhale ability to suck up all of the food. Kirby eats all of it in one gulp with a look of satisfaction on his face. Buu however, is less than pleased with this and quite angered that his food was stolen. Buu: *Points at Kirby* YOU MAKE BUU MAD. BUU MAKE YOU DEAD! “It’s like watching a kid throw a tantrum.” muttered Starlight. FIGHT Kirby and Buu rush towards each other and collide punches, before Kirby knocks Buu back and attempts to knock him out of the sky, but Buu teleports to avoid the attack and hits Kirby with a beam from his mouth which knocks the ability copier out of the air. Kirby lands next to Bonkers, who tries to get away only for Kirby to inhale him and transform into Hammer Kirby. Buu then charges at Hammer Kirby, who counters by hitting him away with his hammer. Kirby throws the hammer at him, retrieves it, and proceeds to beat on Buu before knocking him skyward, at which point he hops onto a newly created Warp Star to knock Buu against a tree, then a wall and eventually pounding him flat against the ground. “Hot damn! That little fella is vicious!” cheered Blue Blood, breaking out of his calm demeanor. “Almost as wild as-” started Luna before her sister gave her a scaving glare. “Don’t you dare!” hissed out Celestia. Buu just pops back up, however, and proceeds to grab Kirby and slam him into the ground so hard that he loses his copy ability before throwing him into the air and knocking him into a forest. Kirby slams into a tree which frightens some of the other citizens there. He then proceeds to inhale Sword Knight and become Sword Kirby. Majin Buu returns as Sword Kirby charges up and delivers a powerful slash that cuts Majin Buu in half at the waist. “Yes, cut that monster down to size!” Rainbow said, punching the air. (*Music Ends*) Buu: *Cries* You hurt Buu! *His two halves zip back together* Almost! “DAMMIT!” everyone said as Fluttershy held her Doomguy plushie in front of her. Kirby then facepalms at what he has to deal with his opponent as a Blade Knight runs past Kirby in a panic. Buu notices them and sends a blob of his body after the fleeing swordsman, which it captures and returns to Buu, granting the jolly giant a sword, which he then uses to fight Sword Kirby. “Kind of feel bad for the monsters over there,” muttered Starlight. It had to suck living there at that moment. (*Cues: Dragon Ball Z: Budokai Tenkaichi 3 - Vital Burner*) Majin Buu then tries to swing his sword at Kirby but actually cuts a tree in half, before losing his sword and getting slashed frequently in the air before getting knocked to the ground. Buu then charges up his Chocolate Beam, causing Kirby to lose his power up out of fear when it misses and turns a boulder into pudding. However, on the second time firing, Kirby inhales the beam along with Majin Buu. Buu then winds up inside Kirby's inner dimension. Buu: No! *angrily punches cake inside Kirby's stomach dimension* NOOOO! (*Cues: Kirby's Return to Dreamland - Vs. Magolor*) Buu's anger becomes so great that it actually causes Kid Buu to separate from him. Kid Buu laughs at him being freed and destroys his doppelganger, pounding on his chest and laughing before escaping back to Dreamland through a dimensional hole. “I kind of feel bad for fat Buu,” muttered Luna as she felt like that the Pink monster might of had a small chance of redemption… if only she knew. Kirby begins to panic as Kid Buu teleports behind him and begins pummeling him before slamming Kirby onto the ground. Kid Buu then teleports in the sky and summons a Shocking Ball attack and laughs maniacally, just before firing the Shocking Ball attack at Kirby. The Warp Star then picks up Kirby just when the Shocking Ball attack was going to kill him. While Kirby is on the Warp Star, a Knuckle Joe runs next to Kirby. Kirby sees the Knuckle Joe and swallows him, becoming Fighter Kirby. Fighter Kirby bumps his fists together and rushes toward Kid Buu. “Go get him Kirby!” everyone cheered for the Pink Hero. Kid Buu is seen doing his stretchy body-shaking dance move as he laughs in what he thinks is victory, but Fighter Kirby then surprise kicks Buu in the face, throws him, and then launches what is similar to a Hadouken from Street Fighter. Kid Buu dodges this attack and tries to roundhouse kick Kirby, but Kirby blocks this and launches an uppercut. Kirby expertly blocks and dodges all of Buu's attacks until he teleports behind him and punches him, destroying his ability. “Damn it!” cursed Rainbow dash while wincing from seeing kirby take a hard blow like that. Buu knocks Kirby into a tree, breaking it, then breaks the Warp Star and sends it to Kirby, which was a big mistake. (*Cues: Kirby Triple Deluxe - Kirby Fighters Animal Helpers*) Kirby swallows the Warp Star, shocking Buu. He becomes Star Rod Kirby, and quickly shoots 3 stars at him. Buu counters, but he can not get a hit in and teleports away. Buu tries to knock it away, but Kirby gets it back and shoots more stars. After Buu teleports many times, Kirby predicts where Buu will go and shoots a gold beam of energy, blowing Buu to pieces. But Buu regenerates and destroys the Star Rod. The loss of Kirby's ultimate weapon leaves him hopeless and crying, while Buu is readying his most powerful attack, the Planet Burst. “Please get up Kirby,” Fluttershy said quietly. “You can’t give up. Dreamland, or what’s left of it, is counting on you,” Twilight said, everyone else holding their breathe as they watched. (*Cues: Kirby Triple Deluxe - Hypernova Kirby*) As Kirby is crying over the loss of his Star Rod, the Miracle Fruit in his stomach activates, causing him to become Hypernova Kirby. Hypernova Kirby swallows and spits out the Planet Burst, and a shocked Buu is helpless, and is shot into the sun by the returned attack. When the sun turns around, it shows Kirby's face, which is zoomed into three times with loud drumming sounds in the background. Kirby: HIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII! KO! Kirby inhales the last remaining part of Buu (his boot) and becomes Buu Kirby and uses the chocolate beam to turn two Waddle Dees into cookies. “..... that can’t be good.” said Twilight wide eyed. Results (*Cues: Kirby Squeak Squad - The Hero of Dreamland *) Boomstick: No way! Did that seriously just happen? “Eyup” said Applejack in the same fashion as her brother. Wiz: Yep. Oddly enough Kirby's strength, speed and durability matched and surpassed Buu's. Yes, Buu has more destructive capability, but Kirby's inhale and copy ability let him absorb and rebound anything that could have killed him. “True. Kirby did have more versatile abilities,” Twilight said, nodding to herself. “It also helps that he had some abilities that could destroy evil. Might not have worked with Fat Buu but Kid Buu is another story,” Starlight said outloud. Boomstick: And Kirby's no slouch when it comes to power. He tanked a planet-sized explosion without a scratch when the same kind of blast turns Buu into mush. And remember the frying pan thing? “How can we forget? You keep bringing it up,” said Rarity with nothing but snark in her tone. Wiz: Popstar is approximately the same size as the planet Shiver Star, which is actually a post-apocalyptic Earth. This means Popstar's gravity and escape velocity must be similar to that of Earth's. Throwing the giant acid monster Popon up to the sun means Kirby threw at least 3.5 tons over 25 000 miles per hour, and that's not even counting the giant frying pan or the return trip. Boomstick: And Kirby's Warp Star moves faster than light, a speed that Buu has never had to combat before. "BUT BOOMSTICK, Buu could teleported away from the planet burst ball, right?" “Ya why didn’t he?” asked Applejack with a raised Brow. Wiz: Well, his Instantaneous Movement has limits in extreme situations, such as when he didn't use it when a similar giant ball of murder was KILLING him at the end of Dragon Ball Z. “Well that's just stupid,” muttered Rarity. Boomstick: Buu just couldn't stomach this fight. “...ow the puns, they hurt.” muttered Blue Blood. Wiz: The winner is Kirby. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Boomstick: Next time on Death Battle. Some rock music kicked in as a white haired man wearing black and red and wielding a giant blade showed up on screen he was kicking some ass on screen. Then his opponent appeared on screen, a tall and muscular bad boy wearing a red headband and spiky brown hair and has odd looking blade who then slashes with a fire strikes. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ “Well that was a good episode” said Twilight while everyone else was getting up and stretching out any kinks from sitting for so long. “I agree Twilight and i’m glad i could come and enjoy the show with you all,” said Blue Blood with a nod. Getting a smile from his childhood friend. “Well Nephew, we could stay for the next episode.” suggested Luna getting a nod of agreement. “Oh! You should stay Blue!” agreed Twilight with a cheer, getting her old friend to smile. “Well ok if you insist i just hope the Pony you had take over while we’re gone doesn't mind waiting a little bit longer.” said Blue Blood. “Oh don’t worry i’m sure he’s doing just fine,” said Celestia reassuringly. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~(back with thor)~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ “Now that i have defeated your men and saved the ponies food, you have no choice but to surrender,” Thor said, waving his hammer threateningly at a gopher. This wasn’t just any regular gopher, it was the Gopher King wearing a red and white cape with a golden crown on his head. “(Curse you. I’ve been planning this attack for years. Now they’re in ruins because of a steroid overdosed pegasus)” the Gopher King yelled in his native tongue, waving his tiny paw threateningly. “HAHA, just another victory for the PRINCE OF ASGARD!” Thor said while laughing. A little ways from the laughing god were two guards looking at the scene in bewilderment. “This is the guy who’s shagging our princess,” one of the guards said in a deadpan tone. His partner glances at him and says, “Kinda fitting though.” Just a normal day in the life of the royal guards. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~back with the main group.~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ “Before we start the next episode, let’s see what we got from the box,” Twilight said, walking towards the glowing box. Her friends and former mentor followed as they gathered around the box. “So this is where you got those interesting items, Auntie?” Blueblood asked, looking at the box with slight interest. “That’s correct, nephew. Whenever an episode is done, this box gives certain things related to the episode,” Luna said, showing off her utility belt. Twilight opened the box with her magic and looked inside to see what they got. The next moment her horn started to glow as a bunch of items were levitated out of the box. “Looks like we got more comics,” Twilight said, handing out a bunch of them. “This’ll be good to read later,” Rainbow said, looking through the Dragonball Z manga. “Got that right,” Spike said, walking over to a self and putting his comics there. “What else do you have, darling?” Rarity asked, looking at two covered objects in Twilight’s magical field. Looking at the packages, Twilight said, “It seems that one’s for Flurry Heart and the other is for Fluttershy.” She then gave the shy mare the wrapped package, who looked at it curiously. She then took her time to open it, carefully removing the wrappings without making a mess. In no time, Fluttershy was finished and held a Kirby plushie in her hooves. “So adorable,” Fluttershy said, hugging the plushie and causing it to say “Hiiii”. The group of ponies and one dragon either laughed or rolled their eyes good heartedly. With that done, Spike walked back to the couch and asked, “Can we start the next episode?” “Sure, just a second,” Twilight said, her horn glowing as the other wrapped package suddenly disappeared. “Sent it to Flurry Heart?” Starlight asked, her eyebrow rising a bit. “Shining actually. Figured it would be safer to do,” Twilight said, sitting on the couch and grabbing the remote. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Chapter end! Next time Sol badguy vs ragna the bloodedge.
Ragna VS Sol Badguy.“So are we ready for the next episode?” Twilight asked everyone in the room. The assorted ponies and dragon nodded as Rainbow flew into the air in an excited fashion. “Hell yeah, I'm ready for this awesomeness-induced episode,” Rainbow said, psyching herself up with her hooves crossed over her chest. “And how do you know it's gonna be awesome, Dash?” Applejack asked, her eyebrow raised. “Heeellllooo? Do you know who you're talking to?” Rainbow asked, floating in front of her friends. “I know. I know. You're Rainbow Dash right,” Pinkie said excitedly, bouncing on the couch. “That’s right. I'm the most awesome mare alive and i know when something is awesome,” Rainbow said proudly. “How?” Starlight asked, sighing slightly. “The trailer showed swords, muscles and epic music. They wouldn’t make this a lame episode if they had that,” Rainbow said, as if explaining what two plus two equals. “Well we’re not gonna find out from the braggot,” Blueblood said, grinning as everyone else laughed. “Hey, watch it Princey.” Rainbow said mildly offended. “So let’s start this episode and see if it’s true or not,” Blueblood said, not bothering to look at the blue pegasus. Twilight took that as her que to push the play button and start the episode. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Interlude (*Cues: Invader - Jim Johnston*) Wiz: No anime tough guy trope is complete unless he has outrageous spiky hair, a sword that's clearly compensating for something... “Oh my,” muttered a blushing Fluttershy while Rainbow snickered. Boomstick: And belts. Lots and lots of belts. “Oh gag me,” muttered Rarity, not liking that kind of fashion design. “I agree, honestly how long would it take to put on that many belts anyway?” Celestia nodded. “And what's the point of wearing extra belts? They go around the waist, nowhere else!” “Rule of cool my dear Aunt, rule of cool.” BlueBlood stated as if it were a solid fact. “This guy gets it!” Rainbow nodded. Wiz: Ragna, the Bloodedge. Boomstick: And Sol Badguy, the Flame of Corruption. He's Wiz and I'm Boomstick. Wiz: And it's our job to analyze their weapons, armor, and skills to find out who would win... a Death Battle. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Ragna (*Cues: BlazBlue Calamity Trigger - Imperial Code*) Wiz: Nearly a century ago, humanity was hunted to near-extinction by the fearsome Black Beast. The group shuddered at the portrait that was shown on screen depicting of a multi headed beast terrorizing people who were fleeing a burning city. “This show is entertaining but it constantly shows us monsters that could bring the end to our world,” said Celestia as she tried to calm down her nerves. Wiz: Fortunately, six brave heroes slayed the monster and saved mankind. The remains of humanity was reorganized under an oppressive government until one man decided to rise up. Ragna the Bloodedge. “Hmmmm six heroes saving the world from great danger… where have i heard that one before?” asked BlueBlood with a knowing smirks while getting some laughs from his aunt’s and even a few cheers from Starlight Spike who was jumping up and down for a the group of SIX young mares who saved the world from great threats. “Awwww shucks it was no big deal,” laughed Applejack, cheeks red from all of the attention she and the rest of her friends were getting. “B-but you're welcome though,” whispered Fluttershy as she hid behind her mane. (*Cues: BlazBlue Calamity Trigger - Rebellion*) Boomstick: Baggy pants, giant sword, brooding personality. Ragna has tragic back-story written all over him. “What anime character doesn't?” Starlight asked. “Either that or angsty teenager. Sort of like Luna when she went through puberty.” said a smirking Celestia. “Yea- HEY! We did not act like that!” yelled Luna once she caught what her sister said. “I remember a certain pony who would lock herself in her room and recite angsty poetry while dressed in dark robes and wearing too much make up. “That was Nightmare Moon corruption!” yelled Luna in a desperate tone. Celestia gave her younger sister a flat look and a raised brow. “Oh really? One Hundred and Thirty years before that even happened? Thirty before you even ascended?” “Well... Just shut up…” muttered Luna lamely as her cheeks were burning redder than an apple from Sweet Apple acres. “Soooo... how was the poetry?” Twilight couldn’t help but ask. Celestia just gave her former student a shrug. “Bad. I believe one of her better works was something along the line of "Ooooh this pale orb in our sky hear mine words of gloom! Why hast mine mother denied me mine dessert for dirtying mine room!", I used her collection of poems as a torture method during the Griffin war. I believe they called the collection the 'Mental Plucking by Nightmare Moon', I never bothered correcting them.” Luna buries her head in her hooves and groans while the rest of the audience just, stares at her and Celestia. Wiz: I'd actually go with gruesome. As a young child, he and his siblings were confined in an experimental facility as lab rats. “.... oh god,” muttered Fluttershy. Boomstick: Bummer. What were they trying to do? Wiz: No one knows. The important thing here is they were rescued by a talking cat named Jubei, who also happened to be the most feared warrior on the planet. However, things took a darker turn when Ragna's sister Saya grew very sick. Boomstick: With what? Wiz: Sickness? No one knows. Ragna took Saya under his wing, but their younger brother Jin was irritated that Ragna was not spending more time with him. Being a reasonable guy, he decided the only solution was to murder his brother. “WHAT. THE. FUCK!?” shouted the group at the asinine idea that Jin came up with. Boomstick: Oh yeah! That makes a ton of sense! I'm lonely. I'll kill one of the people I care about. Great plan. So then a maniacal hipster villain named Yuki Terumi showed up out of nowhere, helped Jin impale Ragna through the chest, and then cut off his arm for good measure. “What kind of foul cretin could just impale his own kin like that! Aunt Luna at least had the excuse of being possessed!” raged Blue Blood. “Who knows?” said Luna with a shrug. “Well I am sure that even if things went bad for them in the beginning, they made up and got better!” Said Twilight in a hopeful tone. And right on cue the magic box gave off a soft glow before a slip of paper flew out and made it’s way to hover in front of Twilight for her to read. NOPE. Was written on the small pieces of paper before it spontaneously combusted, leaving nothing but ash. “Oh... I think I need a drink right now.” muttered a depressed Twilight. She was then surprised when Blue Blood held up a silver flask with a rose design engraved on it. “Here, my personal stash of Minotaur Whiskey for aunt induced migraines.” said Blue Blood with a soft chuckle as his old playmate gave him a thankful smile before taking the offered drink and taking a few sips. “HEY!” yelled the two sisters in irritation. Wiz: Why? How? No one knows. Have you familiarized yourself with that phrase yet? Good, cuz it's not stopping anytime soon. “Oh JOY…” Spike groaned as he noticed Twilight’s eye start to twitch right before she took a huge swig the flask. Background 6'0.8"/185 cm 172 lbs/78 kg Blood type: B Alias: the Grim Reaper Frequent dine-and-dasher Bounty: 90,000,000,000 (Everyone was shocked by the large bounty) His foul mouth gives him the Angry Video Game Nerd a run for his money Has a crippling fear of ghosts (Most of the group were giggling at this) (*Cues: BlazBlue Calamity Trigger - Queen of Roses*) Boomstick: Moving on for sanity's sake,(Twilight: thank you!) Ragna would've been done for until an omniscient time-traveling pig-tailed vampire descended from the heavens, snapped her fingers, magicked him a new arm, and left. No, no. Don't think. Just accept. “This is getting bizarre even for me….” Pinkie said. “Does…. Does not compute,” muttered out Twilight as she was trying yet again to understand another worlds laws and how things are done.... Right before saying fuck it and taking another swig of BlueBlood’s flask. ‘Well she’s broken….” said Spike with a sigh. “I hope she doesn't take after you when it comes to drinking sister,” Luna deadpanned. Giving her blushing sister a flat stare. “I’m not that bad,” whined Celestia with a pouted. “ you drink poko when you're frustrated! I don’t want to hear it from you!” lectured Luna as her sister just kept pouting. “And i thought Luna was the younger sibling,” whispered Applejack jokingly to the rest of the group. Getting a few laughs. Wiz: Surprisingly still conscious and apparently an expert of things that never happened before, Ragna instantly recognized his new appendage as a Azure Grimoire, a piece of the Black Beast which Ragna can use to manipulate Seithr. Seithr is a radioactive energy left behind by the Black Beast all over the world. “So wait they're using something that came from the monster that nearly killed everypony?” asked Applejack with a raised brow. “That doesn't seem smart,” stated Rarity. Boomstick: Like magic. Wiz: Well no. Magic is totally different. “Then what is it Wiz?” asked an annoyed Rainbow. Boomstick: But it lets him do magic-type stuff... Wiz: Yes... “My head hurts…” whined Fluttershy. (*Cues: Black And White - BlazBlue Chrono Phantasma*) Boomstick: Ooo... kay! “I'm confused, if it's not magic then what is it?” Starlight asked in confusion. “Might want to just let it go unless you want to end up like Twilight over there,” Said Luna as she pointed at a twitching mess that was once Twilight Sparkle. “Good point…” said Starlight with a sweat drop running down her head. Boomstick: Well after missing out on the maiming and resurrection of Ragna, Jubei the cat ninja returned and decided to teach him the ways of combat. “Well that’s nice… but where was he?” asked Celestia. Wiz: Where the hell was he before? No one knows. “...... that’s not a good answer,” said Celestia in a deadly tone, eyes narrowed and some ponies swore they saw her mane start to spark a little. Boomstick: Probably destroying someone's furniture or pissing in their shoes. “Most likely,” Agreed Rarity. Raising a cat taught you one thing… cats can be real assholes. Wiz: Through his training, Ragna's control over Seithr became practically unmatched. He can form various parts of the Black Beast in combat, transform his own arm into razor-sharp claws, or drain the soul of his foe through his strikes. “Shouldn’t him using the Black Beast powers be raising some red flags that something might be wrong?” asked BlueBlood. “Maybe that's just how his new arm works,” shrugged Spike deciding to give up on understanding this crazy world. Boomstick: But if he needs more power, more defense, and more... soul-sucking, he can crank these up to 11 with his Blood Kain form. “That's a pretty sweet sounding super mode.” said Rainbow with a nod of respect. Azure Grimoire Gives Ragna virtually unmatched control over seithr Absorbs the soul of its target (Everyone had chills at this) Augmented by the Idea Engine Acquired from the dying ^-No.11 Adds the ability to create a force shield Can activate Blood Kain without losing life force Turned Ragna's right eye red when bonded with him Doubles Ragna's attack power Wiz: Upon completing his training, Jubei bestowed upon him a red cloak and a deadly blade called Blood-Scythe. “But it’s a sword… not a scythe,” said Starlight with a raised brow. Boomstick: This baby can extend for stabbing strikes and like the Azure Grimoire, slowly drains the souls of its victims upon contact. And before you point out that it's clearly a sword and not a scythe, it can do this. Ragna use his Astral Heat on Arakune, which causes Blood-Scythe to transform into a Scythe. “THAT IS SO. COOL!!!” Rainbow and Spike cheered. Move Set Hell's Fang Dashes in with a seithr-enhanced punch Inferno Divider A rising leap slash using his sword Gauntlet Hades Downward strike powered by seithr Dead Spike Summons the jaws of the Black Beast Blood Kain Boosts speed, power and soul-draining ability (*Cues: Nemesis Horizon - BlazBlue Chrono Phantasma*) Boomstick: Ragna's angsty rage took him on a world tour of single-handed government smashing, earning him the nickname the Grim Reaper. “Sooooo cool!” gushed Rainbow Dash. “Indeed it reminds me of our old names during the griffon war, right Red Sun?” asked Luna with a smirk getting one from her sister. “Indeed, Crescent Blade.” Celestia said with a chuckle. “Now that's cool!” Said Spike Be Rainbow Dash with stars in their eye’s. Wiz: And racking up an unprecedented bounty of 90 billion... whatever their currency is. No one knows. And despite being the largest bounty of all time, he still freely walks the world on foot and in public with no attempt to disguise himself whatsoever. “I highly doubt that most ponies would try to confront someone with that kind of bounty” stated BlueBlood getting a few nods from everyone else. Boomstick: Probably because nobody wants to piss him off. We're talkin' about a guy who treats getting knocked through solid concrete as an inconvenience, has survived multiple impalings through the chest, took out hundreds of armed officers without breaking a sweat, and obliterated an entire street with a single one-hand sword strike. “Hot damn! Thats some power right there!” said Applejack with a wide eyed look. Wiz: Ragna is referred to as some as the most powerful man in the world, but he's also known as a risk-taker with a short temper. Everyone gave the resident speedster in the room a look. “What?” asked Rainbow Dash, feeling a little self conscious from the stares she was getting. Boomstick: And despite being trained by the most dangerous kitty cat in the world, Ragna's obviously nowhere near Jubei's level of skill, who terrifies even the deadliest villains of the series. “But he’s so cute~!” gushed Fluttershy after getting a good look at Jubei. Feats Accelerated healing ability Extremely high pain tolerance Taken many impale wounds through vital organs Sacrificed his left arm showing zero pain Punched a crater into a wall with his non-Azure Grimoire hand Defeated the giant anti-Black Beast bio-weapon, Take-Mikazuchi Can defeat Murakumo Units without using his Azure Grimoire Wiz: But after all's said and done, Jubei left Ragna with a dire warning: never think of the Azure Grimoire as your own. Boomstick: Which is kind of bullshit. I mean it's attached to him, so I'm pretty sure he's got dibs. “I don’t think it works like that,” muttered Starlight with a flat look. Wiz: Well he does, but if he loses control over it, it can transform him into the Black Beast itself. “Ha! See i told ya using that power was bad,” yelled Applejack in triumph. Wiz: In fact, Ragna was the original Black Beast, sent back in time after falling into a magic cauldron. The two were somehow separated and did battle in the past. These events would repeat themselves in a 100 year time loop until this chick saved Ragna from falling into that cauldron, stopping the Black Beast from appearing in the past in the first place. “......what?” asked a confused Pinkie Pie. Boomstick: But if the Black Beast never went back in time, then it never would've created Seithr, and everything in BlazBlue shouldn't exist as we know it. So how... Wiz: No one knows. “Now my head is starting to hurt and I was part of several time shenanigans!” said Starlight while nursing a growing headache. Boomstick: You wanna just make this guy fight someone now? “Yes please!” yelled everyone in a desperate tone. Ragna: I'm the main character, and yet again, I get left in the dark! It's really starting to piss me off! “Please tell me that the next character isn't as confusing as this one!” Twilight groaned. “Hope not, my booz supply would be able to handle it,” muttered BlueBlood. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Sol Badguy (*Cues: Guilty Gear XX - Existence*) Wiz: Way back in the year 2010, the discovery of magic forever changed the course of human history. Traditional technology was eliminated for newer and environmentally friendly methods, and after improving the planet, a certain world superpower sought to improve mankind itself. “Hey Twi didn’t you say that Sunset was planning on doing something similar?” asked Rainbow Dash getting a nod from her purple friend. “Yes, Sunset has been planning on not only introducing magic to the human world but she has also been working on some plans to integrate it into everyday life to help everyone,” explained the Princess of friendship. This impressed the rest of the group, especially Celestia who felt a huge swell of pride building in her chest. Boomstick: Oh hey, another super soldier project. Lemme guess, they injected this guy with some serum and it didn't really work out the way they wanted, but now he's a badass. Wiz: Replace serum with magic and... close enough. This man would emerge as the feared bounty hunter, Sol Badguy. Boomstick: So he's clearly the bad guy... Wiz: Actually he's the main hero of the story. “Wait, what?” Twilight said, confused beyond belief. “You wouldn’t think that given his name,” Blueblood said. “Seriously, who names their kid that?” Boomstick: Well then why would they... Background 6'0"/184 cm 163 lbs/74 kg Real Name: Frederick Alias: Haitoku no Honoo Flame of Corruption Favourite band: Queen Ironically Guilty Gear's protagonist, despite the name Has a degree in particle physics (Twilight was intrigued by this) (*Cues: Guilty Gear XX Accent Core Plus - Launch Out*) Wiz: Before Sol's transformation, he was known as Frederick, a scientist tasked with leading the super soldier project alongside with his love interest, Aria, but when he intended to or not, Frederick would become the prototype of this new super race, the Gears. Boomstick: But is he... guilty? Wiz: Oh hell yeah. He was responsible for Aria's death... and then her next death when she was resurrected into this thing. “Guess they can turn people into robots,” Starlight said, half impressed yet half disturbed. “Kinda like Dr. Eggman…” Rainbow mused, not liking where this was going. Boomstick: Oh. Wasn't expecting her to look like that, but not as much as I wasn't expecting the BLUE ROBO PENIS! Who even does that?! Spike and BlueBlood looked ready to puke. “That’s just bucked up,” said a green face Celestia. Wiz: She was likely created as a "FU” to poor Sol by That Man. Boomstick: Which man? (*Cues: Guilty Gear 2: Overture - The Man*) Wiz: That Man. Boomstick: I only see Sol Badguy- “Boomstick is right, i only see Sol,” said Rainbow Dash while she scratched her head. Wiz: No, no it's That Man. “Oh i see who he's talking about!” said Twilight as she spotted the robed man who must be That Man. “Who is it sugarcube?” asked Applejack but before Twilight could answer her friend she was interrupted by Boomstick. Boomstick: It's just me and you here, Wiz. “Ya egghead i don’t see anypony!” yelled an annoyed Rainbow Dash. Wiz/Twilight: Listen. The villain is That Man. Boomstick/Rainbow Dash: Sol Badguy's the hero and the villain? "what a twist!" gasped out Pinkie Pie. Wiz: No, no, he's another character- just pretend Sol Badguy's not there. “What he said Rainbow Dash,” sighed a frustrated Twilight, who was half tempted to grab Blue Bloods flask. Boomstick/Pinky and Dash: YOU MEAN HE'S INVISIBLE?! “I didn’t know Sol would have such a sneaky power!” Gasped out Rainbow Dash much to Twilight's growing rage. BlueBlood and Spike began to sweat. “Oh dear…” Rarity mumbled while Fluttershy hid behind the Princesses. Wiz: When this person was born into the world, his parents looked at this child and decided they would name him "That Man". “Do you finally get it?” groaned out Twilight. Boomstick: Who were they looking at Wiz?! “Ya!” Agreed Rainbow and Pinkie, while the rest of the group notice Twilight's eyes were going bloodshot and twitching wildly. Wiz/Twilight: HIS NAME IS T-H-A-T SPACE, M-A-N! Boomstick: WELL F-U-C-K SPACE Y-O-U! I'M OUT! “Man Twi, for an Egghead you're being kinda dumb,” muttered Rainbow Dash. “Yeah silly-filly! Stop being silly” Pinkie called out, which was the final straw as the rest of the group saw Twilight main burst into flame. “RWARRRR!” Twilight let out a Bloodthirsty roar as she tackled the two much to everyone's shock. “Somepony grab her!” yelled Rarity as the group tried to save Rainbow and Pinkie from an enraged Twilight. The screen pauses and goes gray as Boomstick slams the door off-screen. It took a few moments but they were able to pry Twilight away from the two ponies, Rainbow was now sporting a black eye and Pinkie's mane and tail had been burned, the two were now sitting far away from the lavender Unicorn. (*Cues: The Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time - Windmill Hut*) [Some time later...] Boomstick: So... I looked at the internet and discovered that his actual name is That Man. I apologize for earlier. Let's move on. “Oh, I see… our bad,” muttered Rainbow Dash now getting why her purple friend lost her cool. (*Cues: Guilty Gear - Death and Republic*) Wiz: Sol had to maintain a human appearance to disguise his true Gear form. So he developed a special limiter headpiece to keep his own power at bay. “Maybe we should have one of those made. Just incase,” Rarity said, glancing at Twilight. Boomstick: If that thing comes off, say goodbye to whoever recently pissed him off. Everyone in the group gave Twilight another look. “.... what?” asked Twilight with a flat look. “You know damn well what!” Rainbow snapped, gesturing to her black eye. Twilight blushed, “Ehehehe… sorry…” Wiz: As a Gear, Sol's aging was slowed to a near halt, allowing him more than enough time to develop his own fighting style. Boomstick: Well whatever fighting style lets you punch fire, that's the one I wanna learn. Sol's volcanic viper punches are flame-enhanced strikes while his riot stamp flies in with a fearsome kick. And because this is anime, Sol can trigger his second form: the Dragon Install. “Those are some devastating moves,” Luna said, liking the riot stomp “Indeed they are,” Celestia said, taking note on a few of them. Spike perked up at hearing Dragon Install and paid close attention to the next part. Wiz: The Dragon Install allows Sol to safely tap into a fraction of his full Gear power, boosting his strength, speed, and healing ability. The drawback: he can only sustain this power for so long and afterward, he's left vulnerable. “Sigh… another high risk power up?” asked Starlight. “Hey go big or go home,” shrugged Rainbow Dash. Move Set Gun Flame Shoots fire projectiles from the ground Commonly mistaken for "girlfriend" when called out Bandit Revolver A forward-moving spinning attack Riot Stamp Springs off the wall and flies in foot-first Volcanic Viper Leaps upward, slashing with his sword Dragon Install Temporary enhances speed and power Boomstick: As Sol wandered the Earth, That Man began a plan for world domination using an army of Gears. In response, Sol put together a Gear-obliterating superweapon called OutRage. Wiz: Which looks like the world's most complicated can opener... or next-gen Bop-It. “That was a confusing game, wasn’t it, Twilight?” Spike said, looking at the lavender princess. “It wasn’t that bad,” Twilight said, shrugging her shoulders. “Though I shudder if that’s what it’ll look like,” she said, taking a good look at the weapon. “Looks a bit confusing to be a weapon,” Starlight, Rarity, Luna and Blueblood said at the same time. They couldn’t wrap their heads around it and they wondered how it could work. Boomstick: Turns out it was so powerful nobody could wield it... not even Sol. So he had to split it apart into eight pieces just to make it useable. Naturally, he took the best piece for himself: the flame-enhanced Fireseal. I wanna fire seal, that'd be fuckin' sweet. Try and eat me now, orca whale. Fire seal! That earned a few giggles while Fluttershy whimpered at the image of a seal burning. She thought the animal was too cute and wanted to see one some day. (*Cues: Guilty Gear 2: Overture - The Re-Coming*) Wiz: Using Fireseal to its full potential, Sol defeated That Man's forces twice over. Boomstick: And then he decided to upgrade the shit out of it with the Junkyard Dog Mark 3 casing. Wiz: But this is hardly the full extent of Sol's power. He once survived the Backyard, an alternate dimension which would annihilate the soul of a normal man. And by removing his headband, he can access his full unrestrained potential. The group, even the princesses, shuttered as they saw Sol’s fangs. Boomstick: Like when he shot a laser out of his sword to incinerate an inhuman Gear the size of Mount Everest! Everyone’s eyes went wide when they heard that as Rainbow said, “He shot a laser out his sword?!!!” “And destroyed a gear of that size?!!!” Rarity yelled as Twilight started to feel light headed and Fluttershy held up Doomguy plushie as a shield. Wiz: And once, he went back in time and witnessed his past self get murdered, which should've erased him from the present ala Marty McFly, but he didn't like that idea very much, so he just... didn't. “...What?” most of the group asked “Trying to question the rules of time travel is pointless at this point…” Starlight sighed. Getting a nod from Twilight. Feats Completely incinerated a huge Gear with a fraction of his power (That scared the Princesses) Survived witnessing his past self die Actual reason given: because he's Sol Badguy (Rainbow liked this) Outran a missile and hung onto it with just his fist Endured the soul-destroying atmosphere of The Backyard Once stabbed through the shoulder, then used that same arm to swing his sword seconds later Boomstick: After BlazBlue, nothing is too bizarre for me anymore. “Wish we could say the same,” Applejack said, looking at her barely awake friend. Twilight seemed to be just a hair trigger away from passing out. Wiz: Sol is powerful, but fears his full potential. He's also pretty lazy. His favorite strategy is always whatever's the least strenuous. This lack of extra effort can sometimes leave him underestimating his opponent. Boomstick: But the second he starts trying, few can stand in his way. “HELL YEAH,” Rainbow cheered, watching the awesome ending of Sol’s analysis. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Wiz: Alright, the combatants are set. Let’s end this debate once and for all. Boomstick: It’s time for a DEATH BATTLE!!!!!!!! Before the battle could start, Twilight paused the episode to let everyone discuss on the ones they’ll root for. Ragna was a powerful fighter in his own right and had interesting attacks, but he was a risk taker and a bit hot headed. Sol, on the other hand, knew how to use his powers and was more experienced, but had a lazy attitude. “I feel that I’m gonna have to go with Sol on this,” Celestia said “Oh?” Luna asked, interested in her sister’s reasoning. “I feel that he’s better suited to win since he had time to hone his skills,” Celestia said simply. “I would have thought it was his laziness that won you over,” Luna said, grinning as Celestia glared at her. In the end Celestia and Rainbow Dash voted for Sol as Luna and Blueblood voted for Ragna. The rest of the mane 6 and Starlight didn’t vote as they just wanted to watch the fight. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Death Battle (Note, Sol speaks in Japanese, so all his dialogue will be in parenthesis.) The fight takes place in BlazBlue's Kagutsuchi at nighttime during a rainstorm. In a large garden, Sol is looking over at a wanted poster for Ragna. Ragna walks right past Sol, who then runs past him and stops him in his tracks. Sol: (You're an eyesore!) Ragna: Who are you? Out of my way, or you're dead. Sol: (Tsk. Gun Flame!) “Did they seriously start a fight over something so trivial?” Rarity asked. “Are you really surprised with this show?” Applejack asked, eyebrow raised. “Fair point,” Rarity said, Sol releases Gun Flame at Ragna, which Ragna steps back and avoids. Ragna: You gotta be kidding me. Let's get this over with! (*Cues: Blood Pain II - BlazBlue Chrono Phantasma*) Sol: (I'll burn you to a crisp.) “Ya! No more talking! Just fight!” cheered Rainbow Dash. FIGHT! Sol charges at Ragna, whom is about to slam Blood-Scythe down, and stops it with Fireseal. The two knock each other back and Sol tries using Gun Flame again. Ragna avoids this and lunges at Sol, whom jumps back before slamming Fireseal. The two clash weapons once again, then swing their swords at each other. As Ragna goes for a strike, Sol jumps upward and kicks Ragna, who goes flying toward a wall. Ragna bounces upward to attack, but Sol kicks him multiple times before sending him slamming to the ground. “Ultra combo!” yelled pinkie Pie. Ragna lands on his knees and breathes heavily before preparing the Azure Grimoire. Ragna: Bitch! Restriction Number 6... Before Ragna can finish, he is kicked by Sol, knocking him back. “That was a bit rude,” Fluttershy said, hugging Doomguy plushie. “It’s a fight Fluttershy.” said Applejack. Ragna: You're gonna pay! Ragna punches the ground, then raises Azure Grimoire. Suddenly, Sol is trapped by Dead Spike. Ragna: Restriction 666 released, Dimensional Interruption Imaginary Number Formed! BlazBlue, activate! “Golly, that’s a jump in animation quality,” Pinkie said, holding her hooves to her mouth. Ragna charges at Sol for a punch. The Dead Spike holding Sol disappears, but before he can react, Ragna punches him, sending him flying into the next area, where he bounces off a wall. Before he can hit the ground, Ragna uses the Azure Grimoire to stab him, then proceeds to unleash a combo with Blood-Scythe. Ragna: It's my turn now! The combo concludes with Sol hitting the ground. Ragna picks him up, but the grapple is reversed and Sol throws Ragna into the wall. “It’s always getting thrown against a wall with him” said Rarity as she took notice of Ragna’s happed of slamming into the wall in this fight. Ragna: Idea Engine, linked! This'll sting! Suddenly, the Azure Grimoire glows with a white light and Sol is suddenly knocked right into the wall. He then falls down with his next comment muffled by the ground. “Okay. There’s too much stuff goin on,” Applejack said, trying to keep track of the fight and the combos they were doing. “It’s a fighting game. You get use to it,” Spike said, eating a ruby. (*Cues: Ride The Fire - Guilty Gear Xrd*) Sol gets up and unleashes Dragon Install to tap into his power, to which Ragna retaliates with Blood Kain. Ragna: Blood Kain! “Now things are getting really “heated” up and they’re about to get “bloodied” up,” Luna said, thinking it was a good pun. Unfortunately the assorted ponies and dragon groaned as if it physically hurt them. “Please don’t be like Boomstick or Sunset,” Celestia said, groaning while shaking her head. “Sunset made puns?” Spike and Twilight said outloud. “When she was younger. It was one of the reasons why we never got along,” Celestia said, thinking about all the wasted bonding moments. The two charge at each other and strike, with both hitting the other's sword. Sol is on the offensive and overpowers Ragna, then knocks him into the air. During his assault, Ragna reverses it and slams Sol back to the ground. He flies downward and swings Blood-Scythe as Sol jumps out of the way, then the two trade swings and punches. Then Ragna grabs ahold of Sol by his head and tosses him into the air before punching him and striking him with Blood-Scythe multiple times. Ragna: Inferno Divider! “What a “bloody” combo,” Blueblood said, grinning at Celestia’s discomfort. “Please stop with the puns,” Celestia begged, thinking of how her daughter would react to this. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ with sunset ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ We find Sunset at her apartment sleeping in her bed until she suddenly woke up and look up at her ceiling with narrowed eyes. “My pun senses are tingling,” Sunset said out of the blue. “Thats nice babe now please come back to bed,” muttered Adagio while her sisters tried pulling Sunset back to bed with them. “Sigh… might as well, i got a date with Twilight in the morning anyway.” muttered Sunset as she hopped back into bed. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ back with the group~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Ragna lands and exits Blood Kain while Sol falls to the ground. Sol lies down and is about to get up, but then he exits Dragon Install and is momentarily stunned. Ragna uses this to his advantage and grabs him. Ragna: Tappin' out? “More like knocked out,” muttered BlueBlood. Ragna places Blood-Scythe in front of him, then extends it, penetrating through Sol, who screams out in pain. Ragna then tears it out of Sol, whom falls to the ground. Ragna: I'm not gonna waste anymore time on you, asshole! Suddenly, Ragna is stabbed. Ragna: Shit! Sol had stabbed Ragna above the groin with Fireseal. Ragna steps back and begins to bleed from his wound. This pushes Ragna too far and after dark clouds of smoke cover him. “That doesn’t look good,” Twilight said, feeling a bit uneasy at the ominus scene. (*Cues: Howling Moon II - BlazBlue Chrono Phantasma*) Ragna transforms into the multi-headed Black Beast. “Damn he's big!” yelled Applejack. “I don’t think I would try and fight that,” Rainbow said, taking Doomguy plushie from Fluttershy. The shy mare was hiding behind her rainbow maned friend as the plushie’s eyes glowed crimson. “As my beloved would say: fought bigger.” Celestia smirked. Sol looks over at the eight-headed beast and as smoke covers him, he takes off his headband and transforms into his true Gear form. As the heads of the Black Beast charge towards Sol, Sol swings Fireseal, firing a powerful blast. The Black Beast's heads are overwhelmed and the blast continues to fire upward into the sky. After a bright flash of light, Sol is seen standing on a small piece of land after the attack in his regular form, with Ragna nowhere to be seen. Sol then cracks his neck and chuckles. “.... Well that was anticlimactic,” Pinkie muttered, thinking that the fight ended a bit too fast. K.O.! Sol jumps down into the rubble, comes across a book titled "BlazBlue Story Script", knocks it upward, punches it away with a fiery strike, and then walks off. “NOOOOO!!! SO MANY UNANSWERED QUESTIONS!!!,” Twilight screamed, rocking back and forth on the couch. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Results (*Cues: Guilty Gear Xrd Sign - Give Me a Break*) Boomstick: Bullseye! Wiz: Ragna put up a tough fight, but Sol had him outclassed. Boomstick: Likely due to the fact that while Ragna had on four belts, Sol had 18. “Makes sense to me,” Blueblood said, grinning as he knew what would happen next. “NO IT DOESN’T!! DON’T EVEN SAY THAT!!” Twilight yelled, her eye twitching slightly. Wiz: Sol's centuries worth of fighting experience trumped Ragna's training and he has consistently shaken off wounds more easily. Boomstick: Even Sol's... soul is tough enough to withstand Ragna's Azure Grimoire, just like when it survived the Backyard. “So Sol has a strong “soul”,” Luna said, trying to get a laugh. Celestia just sighed and at that point, she took Blueblood’s fask and took a swig from it. Wiz: The Black Beast was impressive, but Sol's Gear form is leagues above. Recall when Sol turned that Gear the size of Mount Everest into dust. By comparing the size of the Gear to the clouds, we can determine its volume to be around 140 billion cubic meters. Destroying something this size would require more than 85 gigatons of TNT. That's nearly 200 times more powerful than the 9.0 earthquake that hit Japan in 2011. Boomstick: More than enough to take Ragna down... and that was only a fraction of Sol's real power. Ragna just burned out in the end. “Sol too OP. Nerf now,” Pinkie said, holding up a sign that said “Nerf this”. Wiz: The winner is Sol Badguy. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Boomstick: Next time on Death Battle. The group sees a red-haired boy with a gourd controlling sand sand as a weapon then it cuts to a blind girl who can control earth. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ “That was pretty interesting, Twilight. This makes me wish i came by sooner if this is what you were doing,” Blueblood said, getting off the couch and to his hooves. “I would have invited you, but i wasn't sure if you would like this,” Twilight said, walking towards the glowing box. “Well at least you know to invite me another time then,” Blueblood said jokingly, lightly pushing Twilight’s shoulder. “And we'd love to have you watch another episode in the future,” Rarity said, walking beside the two. “Seriously what's taking you guys?” Rainbow asked impatiently, hovering over the box. “Rainbow, you shouldn't yell at the prince and the princesses,” Fluttershy said quietly, looking at Rainbow disapprovingly. Rainbow was about to apologize when Celestia and Luna said, “It's fine.” BlueBlood didn't say anything rude but he did shrug since he was use to this. They gathered around the box once more as the glow stopped. Twilight opened the box and peered inside, but pulled her head out as her horn began to glow. The next moment bunch of stuff. “Looks like we got some posters,” Twilight said, giving them to everyone. “Gonna put this right next to my favorite picture,” Rainbow said, looking at the Sol Badguy poster she got. “Would it be worth it to frame this or not,” Blueblood said quietly, rolling up the Ragna poster. “I think Discord might like this,” Fluttershy said, putting the poster in her saddlebags. “I’ll figure out what to do with this later. Is something wrong, Twi?” Applejack asked, seeing her lavender friend looking inside the box. She watched as Twilight pulled out a small yet wrapped package. “What’cha got, Twi? A package for ya?” Applejack asked curiously. “Yeah. Wonder what it is,” Twilight said, ripping off the wrapping. It took her a few moments to open the package and pull out what was inside, holding it in her hooves. Twilight’s eye began twitching which worried her friends. Starlight, being the closest, walked towards her mentor and asked, “Is everything ok, Twilight?” As she got closer, she saw the book’s title and said, “Complete Guide of Blazblue?” “Yeah. Ha ha. I got the book. Ha ha,” Twilight said, laughing slightly while rocking back and forth. “It’s not like I couldn’t of used this earlier. Ha ha ha,” Twilight said, laughing a little more crazily. Not wanting to deal with anymore insanity, Starlight grabbed Twilight’s shoulders and started to shake her. “Snap out of it, Twilight. We don’t need you going crazy,” Starlight said, between shakes. The others could only watch in either worry for her friends or amusement for the royals. “Stop shaking me, Starlight,” Twilight said, her words sounding like a strange echo. Starlight stopped the shaking as Twilight fell to the floor and said, “Stop the room from spinning.” “That’ll pass momentarily, Twilight. Now we must head back to Canterlot. Hopefully he didn’t cause any damage,” Celestia said, muttering the last part as she gathered hers, her sisters and Bluebloods stuff together. “Did you say something?” Rarity asked, clearly hearing the princess’s mumbles. “Oh just talking to myself. Now we must be leaving as it’s getting a bit late. Until next time my friends,” Celestia said, teleporting herself and her family back to Canterlot. “Is it really that late?” Twilight asked, looking at a clock. True to her former mentor’s words, it was pretty late in the day. “Guess time really does fly, huh? We’ll watch the next episode another time, right?” Twilight asked, looking at her friends. “Sure egghead, but there’s one thing we need to do before we leave,” Rainbow said, hovering in the air. “What?” Twilight asked curiously. “I think she means her black eye. If you don’t mind,” Fluttershy said as Doomguy plushie pointed his small BFG at the lavender princess. “Yeah, you really did a number on her,” Spike said, munching on a gem. “Oh, right,” Twilight said, casting a healing spell on Dash’s eye. In an instant, the black eye was healed as Rainbow said, “Thanks,” and flew home. The rest of her friends said their own goodbyes before leaving as Starlight, Spike and Twilight were the only ones left in the castle. “That was fun,” Twilight said, breaking the silence. “It was besides the part where you lost it,” Spike said sarcastically as Twilight blushed in embarrassment. “Something on your mind, Starlight?” Spike asked, looking at the pink unicorn. “I’m just wondering why no one got something of Sol,” Starlight said, making the dragon and princess think. “You’re right but there’s nothing we can do,” Twilight said, walking up the stairs to her room. The other two went to their own respective rooms for some sleep, unaware that someone did get a Sol Badguy item. Meanwhile in an apartment in an alternate world “Ok, just have to put this piece in here and I’ll be done,” Sunset Shimmer said, trying to reassemble her rifle. There was nothing for the girl, who was a pony, to do so she decided that it might have been the right time to do some maintenance on her gun. Just as she finished, Sunset heard a knocking on her front door as she got up and walked to the door. “If you’re trying to sell me something then get …. lost,” Sunset said, opening the door to find no one there. Seeing that it wasn’t a salesman or the girl scouts, Sunset was about to walk back inside when she saw a box on her doorstep. Grabbing the box, she saw that it was addressed to her and took it inside before closing the door. “Wonder what’s inside,” Sunset said, grabbing a knife and opening the package. With the tape cut, she moved the lids and opened the box to find some white and red clothes. “Strange, but I might as well see what I got,” she said, walking to her room to try on the clothes. After a couple of minutes to change, Sunset stood in front of her mirror to look at her outfit. If anyone were to see her now, they would see her wearing an exact replica of Sol Badguy’s outfit. “These clothes are kinda weird, but they feel so right,” Sunset said, striking a pose. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ CHAPTER END! NEXT TIME GAARA VS TOPH!
Gaara vs Toph.We find our group of heroes back in the rec room to enjoy another great episode of Death Battle. But it seems we have some unexpected guest today…. Well unless you’ve been reading the comments then you know who’s appearing this chapter. “So Pinkie… if i may ask, why are your sisters here?” asked Twilight as she look at the Pie sisters all sitting on a extra couch that Twilight had bought for when guest came over to watch Death Battle. The pink party pony was about to answer her bookworm friend until she was interrupted by her more tempermental sister. “well EGGHEAD if you MUST know, Maud said all three of us should visit Pinkie Pie,” snarked Limestone Pie, much to her older sister Maud’s silent charging. And it seems she wasn’t the only one who wasn’t amused by the the middle child of the Pie Family if the flat look the Twilight was giving was any hint at her annoyance “You know i can send you to the Moon for that attitude right?”.said Twilight with a flat tone. And while everyone (minus Maud and Pinkie) were getting a little nervous from the tense atmosphere, Limestone simply gave the princess of Friendship a smirk. “Heh you got a backbone on ya you're Highness, I like that.” said Limestone with a nod of respect. Pinkie being the ever energetic Pony she was couldn't help but bounce in her seat in barely restrained happiness. “YAY! My sis made another friend!” she cheered. “Ah think you might be exaggerating things a little bit sugar cube,” muttered Applejack, to the farm pony all she could see was a fight about to happen. “That’s just how Limestone makes friends…” said Maud in her usual monotone voice as her younger sister Marble nodding shyly in agreement. “Well let’s start the show before this two become any friendlier” muttered Spike as he pressed play. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Interlude (*Cues: Invader - Jim Johnston*) Wiz: Throughout Death Battle, we've seen all manner of weapons and abilities, but these two combatants command the Very Earth around them. Limestone smirked. “This should be interesting...” Boomstick: Gaara of the Desert. “I wonder what he did to get that title?” wondered Rainbow Dash, thinking it would be awesome having a title like “Rainbow Dash of the clouds” Wiz: And Toph Beifong, the Blind Bandit. “I wonder if the dear is really blind?” worried for the fighter if they really did have such a huge disadvantage. Boomstick: He's Wiz and I'm Boomstick. Wiz: And it's our job to analyze their weapons, armor, and skills to find out who would win... a Death Battle. Gaara (*Cues: Akatsuki - Naruto Shippuden*) Wiz: Gaara of the Desert is a short, skinny, pale, stick of a kid, but he's also one of the deadliest shinobi in the world. Boomstick: He looks like a member of Green Day. “Pretty pasty for someone who lived in the desert his whole life...” Rainbow added. “Though he does have that eerie feel, like he could kill you by just glaring at you...” “Meh, living with Maud has taught me that anyone can be deadly even if they look like they are someone who would rather read a book,” said Limestone while giving her older sister a side glance. “Mm-hmm!” agreed Marble. Knowing how strong her older sister was and how deadly she can be if angered…. That poor Dragon who thought it was a good idea to steal the gems in their rock mines. (*Cues: Unknown Theme*) Wiz: Gaara is the son of the Fourth Kazekage, leader of the village hidden in the sand. Born prematurely at the cost of his mother's life, Gaara was destined for a childhood of depression and loneliness from the get-go. “That poor boy...” Fluttershy whimpered as Rainbow wrapped her wing around her. “Life just not fair,” muttered Applejack as she tilted her hat foward to hide the tears welling up. Boomstick: Not even a minute old and already has a kill under his belt. “Boomstick! Not. Cool!” yelled Spike in anger. Boomstick: Though, technically he had a little help. Because... You see... (*Cues: Eerie - Naruto*) Boomstick: As he was being born, his father was like, "Hey! You know what would be awesome? Using ninja magic to seal a horrible monster in my son's belly to turn him into an ultimate weapon!" Gaara: *screams in pain and agony* “What kind of a shit-stain father does that to his kid?!” Limestone snapped. “..... A monster.” said Maud. “Whoa Maud! Calm down,” said Pinkie Pie trying to calm down her sister who was ready to blow her top. Wiz: The process was successful and Gaara became a jinchūriki: human beings who have powerful tailed beasts trapped within them. Gaara's beast was Shukaku, a giant tanuki with power over sand. “Tanukis are sooo cute!” squee Fluttershy. Boomstick: Aww, I want a tanuki as a pet. They're so fluffy and adorable, you just wanna hu-- (Shukaku appears) HOLY SHIT, WHAT IS THAT!? “Dear CELESTIA!” screamed Rarity as she saw one the nine Biju. “.... still cute,” said Fluttershy with a slight daze. Background Age: 19 Full title: Gaara of the Sand Waterfall Birthdate: January 19th Bloodtype: AB Son of the Fourth Kazekage Host of Shukaku Brother of Temari & Kankuro Fifth Kazekage (*Cues: Akatsuki - Naruto Shippuden) Wiz: Shukaku loathed humanity and at first, Gaara had difficulties controlling the monster's rage, accidentally hurting others. As such, he was shunned by his own people, forced to live a secluded life. Boomstick: Well, yeah, I mean, he's got a goddamn tummy monster. It's not like Pepto-Bismol’s solving that. “Not the time for jokes Boomstick,” growled Rarity. (*Cues: Loneliness Theme - Naruto*) Wiz: Convinced his only option was to fight and care for only himself, Gaara became a ruthless killing machine. “No pony should live that life,” whispered Marble in one of her rare moments of speaking. Boomstick: But it's not all bad. Having a digestive desert demon gives him control over all things sand. “That reminds me of the legend of the first Saddle Arabian king,” said Twilight with a smile. “It was once said he defended his Kingdom from dragons by wiping up sandstorms,” “That’s so cool!” cheered Rainbow Dash with stars in her eyes. “Whatever happen to the king?” asked Maud with a surprising interest. Twilight had to think for a bit before answering. “Well legend says that he gave his throne to his younger brother before going on a journey to hunt down a earth pony bandit that could control earth was always challenging the king, but that's all that the legend says,” said Twilight with a shrug. “Hmmm…” hummed Maud. (*Cues: Gaara's Theme - Naruto*) Boomstick: He can wield it as a weapon using his mind to trap and crush his foes, Oh and he can also use it to freaking fly, how the hell does that work? “Same way a unicorn can fly on a carpet or any other object, by standing on it as they make it flout,” said Starlight with a matter of fact tone. Wiz: He can mentally adjust the density of his sand, whether it needs to be lighter than air or stronger than steel, He can even use it to stop bombs powerful enough to wipe out an entire village. He can control any sand in his vicinity using his Chakra, a spiritual energy Shinobi access for Superhuman abilities, such as walking up a tree. “Wait, i’ve seen Pinkie walk up tree’s! Does that make her a ninja too…” wondered Rainbow Dash. “Hahahaha! I’m a ninja! Fear my ninja-tude!” laughed the pink Party Pony. “That's not a real word,” muttered a annoyed Twilight. Boomstick: This guy's like the ultimate emo kid, but I'm not gonna give him too much crap, because he can use existing sand to crush the ground around him for even more sand, so he's never without easy access to ammo. Despite this, he still carries a gigantic gourd of sand on his back. Wiz: It's huge! You'd think that'd be hard on his spine. Interestingly enough, its unique shape and size is a reference to how in Japanese folklore, Tanuki's were considered to be so well endowed they'd have to sling their testicles over their shoulders… “WAIT, WHAT!?” yelled most of the group. “EWW!!” said Rarity. “MY EYES!! CANNOT UNSEE!!” Spike screamed. “That's just disgusting.” Maud said, her eye slightly twitching. Boomstick: Awesome... “Dude! Not awesome,” said a green face Spike. Wiz: But the thing is, Gaara's gourd is not carrying any ordinary testicles, I mean sand! A small portion of the group cracked up at this. Wiz: Gaara has infused his own Chakra into the gourd sand. Boomstick: This directly links it to Gaara, making it much easier for him to control. He's so skilled with it, he can even forge weapons from it, bury people underground or send it into another person's bloodstream and control them like some sort of puppet, talk about an itch you're not gonna scratch. “That’s some scary power right there,” muttered Limestone while everyone else agreed. (*Cues: Akatsuki - Naruto Shippuden) Wiz: Also, Gaara eventually battled and defeated his own father who happened to be a zombie at the time, His father used a Magnetic Release ability to control gold dust, much like Gaara does sand. “Huh. i guess it makes sense that they would share a similar fighting style,” said Rainbow Dash with a shrug. Boomstick: Even though he can't do the Zombie Dad Magnet thing, Gaara added Gold Dust to his gourd sand anyway, giving him more control over it's weight. Wiz: But wait, there's more, with her dying breath, Gaara's mother somehow imparted her own power into this sand. It became living sand, an extension of her will determined to follow and protect Gaara. It will spring from the gourd to defend him from any danger, regardless of risk and without command. “Nothings stronger than a mother's love,” said Spike while giving Twilight a smile who returned it while also giving him a hug. “And don’t forget father's too!” cheered Rainbow Dash with everyone else agreeing. Arsenal Sand Gourd Johyo rope dart Gold Dust Jutsu Sealing Tag Boomstick: This absolute defensive technique is called... The Absolute Defense, pretty good name really, Gaara sand is so dense and fast, only someone who can move nearly the speed of sound can pass it. “That would take somepony like Rainbow Dash with her speed to get passed it!” gasped Rarity as everyone else were amazed at such a powerful defence. “No wonder he’s so powerful, his Defence is like the saddle arabian king i talked about!” said Twilight in awe. Wiz: Gaara can also use everyday sand to create defences such as his Sand Armor, which encases him in a shell to soften blows, unlike his automatic Absolute Defense, the Sand Armor is self-created, and requires a large amount of his Chakra to maintain. “Sounds like the magic skin layer that the Royal Guard uses to protect themselves,” said Twilight while marveling at Gaara’s powerful defence. “Huh so that's how they're able to take so much punishment when a bad guy shows up,” said Applejack. “Yep! Celestia charges some of her magic into the gems in their chest plate and it cast the spell when they wear the armor,” said Twilight. Happy to teach pony in any subject. Jutsu Armor of Sand Shield of Sand Third Eye Desert Wave Sand Binding Coffin Sand Binding Prison Sand Clone Sand Hail Sand Shuriken Boomstick: Gaara's skill with sand is only limited by how much Chakra he's got left in his system, After running low, he could tag out and give Shukaku a turn fighting, until a group of crazy people literally pulled the sand monster from his body for good, that must've hurt, it's gotta be like twice as bad than that night after Chipotle. Wiz: He died... This shocked the rest of the group and also angered them that someone would do something like that to someone who's suffered like Gaara. Boomstick: Oh... the same then. “Not cool Boomstick,” hissed out Spike. (*Cues: Gaara's Theme - Naruto) Wiz: Turns out losing Shukaku was actually a blessing in disguise (*Cues Gaara's theme again*), after being resurrected, Gaara spent some time re-evaluating his emotional roller coaster of a life, inspired by Naruto Uzumaki, he began to truly understand compassion, his attitude changed, his people began supporting him, he even commanded the Allied Shinobi Forces during the Fourth Great Shinobi War, and like his late father, Gaara also became... Boomstick/Pinkie Pie: A ZOMBIE?! Wiz: Kazekage... Boomstick: DAMN! Well, even non-zombie and missing Shukaku, Gaara still retained his powerful Chakra and skill over sand. Feats & Strengths Achieved Kazekage rank at 15 Protected Sunagakure from Deidara's C3 bomb Sand is faster than the eye can see Held up a falling meteor Defeated Rock Lee & Sasuke Defeated his father, Rasa Regimental Commander of the Allied Shinobi Forces Wiz: In their fight, Gaara was so powerful, his father mistook him for Shukaku itself, despite the sand monster being long gone. “That's saying something if you're compared to a creature that looks like celestia might not even win in a straight fight.” muttered Limestone. Boomstick: Gaara is stronger and smarter than ever, all thanks to his mother's love... I miss Mama Boomstick... “Even somepony like Boomstick has a soft spot for his mother,” said Rarity with a small hint of respect. Wiz: Few can withstand the overwhelming power of this sand shinobi... or Mama Boomstick's cooking. Boomstick: HEY! You're uninvited to Thanksgiving. “I agree that was quite rude Mr.Wiz,” said Fluttershy. Wiz: I never was! Boomstick: Exactly... A person running from Gaara's sand is caught and is pulled back into the dark hallway, screams loudly as Naruto and Shikamaru looked on paralyzed in place, Gaara then silently approaches them from behind and walks past them. “….. I think i peed a little,” muttered Rainbow Dash. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Toph (*Cues: A:TLA - Panda Lily*) Wiz: As the only child of the wealthy Beifong family, Toph was kept a secret from the rest of the world. Hidden away, she was pampered and guarded like a fragile child. Her parents were hopeful she could someday become a noble respected member of Earth Kingdom society. “Pfft! Bor~ing!” said Rainbow Dash. rolling her eyes. Boomstick: But their hopes were pretty much dashed from the moment she popped out. See those faded whites? Yeah, Toph's completely blind. “Poor thing,” said Fluttershy on the verge of tears Lao Beifong: My daughter is blind. She is blind and tiny and helpless and fragile! “She wouldn’t be on this show if she was buster,” snarked Applejack. Boomstick: Still, "fragile" is the last word that I would want to use to describe this chick. Background Age: 12 (Avatar)/88 (Korra) Full name: Toph Beifong Daughter of a prestigious family Extremely acute senses beside sight Former police chief Stage name: The blind bandit Eventually retired to the swamp as a hermit “So she’s a hermit as well? Maybe she’d get along with Zecora,” Twilight said, thinking about her rhyming friend. (*Cues: A:TLA - The Seven Chakras*) Wiz: Frustrated by her parents' stubborn coddling, Toph ran away from home at the age of six and ended up losing her way in a cave, until she was rescued by some giant Badgermoles. Yes, they're badgers and they are moles. “Thank harmony our parents aren’t like that,” Limestone said, leaning back into the couch. “Mmhmm,” Marble hummed from her spot. “Really? It seemed like they were pretty strict to me,” Applejack said, looking at Pinkie’s sisters. “With work and chores, yeah. Other than that, our parents are pretty supportive of us. How else do you think our parents let Pinkie be a party pony or let Maud go to college,” Limestone said, waving her hoof nonchalantly. “Our parents want to make sure we’re safe, but they know we can take care of ourselves,” Marble said, hiding behind her mane. “Besides our father threw wilder parties than Pinkie back in his day,” Maud said, taking her eyes off the screen. “Really?” Applejack asked, not believing what she heard. From what she saw, the old stallion seemed to be a stick in the mud to her. “I’m still trying to figure out how Pa got an elephant into the church,” Pinkie said, scratching her head. Hearing that, Applejack wisely turned back to the screen and decided to forget what she heard. Boomstick: Imagine one of those things burrowing into your home. What kind of pest control do you even call for that? Oh wait, I know. FIRE. “Boomstick no!” screamed Fluttershy. Wiz: Like Toph, Badgermoles are blind. So they took a liking to her. Boomstick: Well, how the hell would they know? Wiz: And as the original artists of the craft, the Badgermoles began her training in the art of earthbending. Toph Practices Earthbending a small rock, and succeeds. “Those critters are some good teachers,” Applejack said as they rest of the group were stunned. (*Cues: A:TLA - Invading the Palace*) Boomstick: These giant varmints taught Toph how to manipulate rock and stone using movements similar to the chu-gar praying mantis martial art, Toph can telekinetically throw, grow, shrink, and alter earth in any conceivable way, making for some pretty down to earth attacks and defenses. “She really “rocks”!” joked Pinkie Pie while everyone else let out a groan. “Dammit Pinkie,” muttered an irritated Limestone. Wiz: The Badgermoles also taught Toph how to see. Boomstick: Wait, these ridiculous creatures are also masters of LASIK surgery?! “No you mouth breather,” muttered Rarity. Wiz: No, Toph does not use her eyes to see, of course, her other senses are extremely accurate, and as a master earthbender, Toph can sense the location of earth anywhere. Even more impressive though, the Badgermoles navigate their tunnels using an earthbending technique known as the Seismic Sense". And Toph quickly picked up on this talent. It's kind of like sonar. It works by detecting the exact location and movement of a person or object through their interaction with the ground. Toph: I feel the vibrations in the earth, and I can see where everything is, you, that tree, even those ants. “WOW… that's impressive fer a blind girl… and so young too…” Applejack smiled, proud to see the girl accomplish such a feat. (*Cues: A:TLA - Yuyen*) Wiz: She feels every movement, every footstep, every heartbeat, so precisely, she can even tell if a person's lying. “She'd make a pretty good detective… or even a Royal Guard!” Spike smiled, imagining how easy it would be to fight crime with such abilities. “Would be pretty useful get farmin’ too…” Applejack added. “She could take care of everything at home easily,” Maud said, nodding to what her cousin said. Bending Arts Earthbending Seismic Toss Earth compression Metalbending Sandbending Mudbending “These bending skill sound very useful,” Starlight said, wondering what other kinds of bending there are. “I wanna learn mudbending,” Pinkie said, hoping on the couch. Maud slowly turned to look at her pink furred sister and said, “No.” Boomstick: A woman who can always tell when i'm lying? No thank you! Toph is so good at this that even her closest friends sometimes forget she's blind. Sokka: *Drops Toph's championship belt to her, but it hits her head and she falls over* Toph: Ow! Sokka: Sorry. “HA!” laughed Rainbow and Limestone. Boomstick: But don't worry, they're reminded. (*Cues: Unknown Theme*) Boomstick: In only six years, Toph had completely mastered Earthbending. She even won the Earth Rumble VI tournament multiple times under her stage name, "The Blind Bandit". “Huh that was the title of the Bandit that the king had a rivalry with,” said Twilight in astonishment. Wiz: But Toph didn't stop her training with just earthbending. At first, softer earth proved difficult for her seismic sense. Toph: I feel the vibrations in the ground with my feet, but this sand is so loose and shifty, it makes everything look fuzzy. “That most of caused them some real trouble.” commented Starlight. Wiz: But she has since demonstrated her mastery in both sandbending and mudbending, she can also change the density of earth from sand to stone and back, and before you start making any density or hardening innuendos, she's twelve. (*Cues: Unknown Theme*) Boomstick: I...okay… “Well, at least he has SOME standards…..” Rarity growled. Boomstick: But her greatest achievement is the discovery of an all-new bending art, one thought to be impossible: Metalbending. “Aw ya now that sounds like something i could get behind,” cheered Limestone with a hoof pump. (*Cues: A:TLA - Yuyen again*) Wiz: By manipulating the earthly composition within, Toph can bend nearly any type of metal just as well as stone, the exception being highly purified metals such as platinum. Boomstick: Toph quickly mastered metalbending, and went on to teach it to others. Wiz: She eventually even founded and led a metalbending police force. “Now that's more like it!” Limestone smirked. “An entire police force that can metalbend? This girl gets shit DONE!” Boomstick: And that's after conquering Earth Rumble IV, holding up a building the size of a castle, defeating an entire army almost single handedly, and dueling King Bumi to a standstill, and that guy's conquered an entire hostile city by himself. “Ok, now I wanna know more about this “Bumi” fellow… sounds like a cool guy!” Pinkie said, thinking the old man looked fun. Feats & Strengths Reigning champ of Earth Rumble Invented Metalbending Dueled Bumi to a draw Held up Wan Shi Tong's library Trained the Avatar in Earthbending Destroyed several Fire Nation Blimps Created the Metalbending Police Force Wiz: Even in her old age, Toph was capable of going one on one with the new Avatar, and her Seismic Sense could locate people across the world. “But…. how….. What?” Twilight began to ask, her hair starting to stick out. Spike rubbed her back and said, “Shhh. Calm down, Twilight.” The act did the trick as Twilight let out a sigh and her mane went back to normal. Boomstick: She knows when I've lied AND where I've been? Women should not have these powers. “Oh i disagree Mr. Boomstick,” giggled out Rarity. Toph: I am the greatest earthbender in the world! Don't you two dunderheads ever forget it! “Booya!” cheered Rainbow Dash. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ The gang were thinking over who they should pick. After much debate, Twilight, Spike, and Fluttershy chose Gaara for his feats of protecting and leading a village. Starlight, Rainbow Applejack and Rarity went with Toph because they felt her accomplishments were more amazing like creating a new art. The Pie sisters didn’t pick and stayed neutral. For some reason it felt wrong to pick between the two combatants. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Death Battle (*Cues: Naruto Shippuden: Clash of Ninja Revolution 3 - Leaf Forest*) Gaara is shown standing alone is a rocky battlefield. At the other end of the battlefield, a building made of rock rises out of the ground. It opens up, and Toph walks out. Toph: Whew, talk about a rough ride. Gaara: You do not belong here. This is sacred ground. Leave. Toph: Pfft. Oh yeah, tough guy? Make me. “She should respect someplace sacred,” muttered Twilight. “Gaara’s is kind of in the right in this fight,” agreed Applejack. (*Cues: Naruto Shippuden: Clash of Ninja Revolution 3 - Forest at Night*) FIGHT! Toph stomps the ground, making a boulder rise up. Toph punches it toward Gaara. She stomps the ground again, summoning two boulders that she hurls at Gaara. Toph punches the ground creating four more boulders and throws them at Gaara. Gaara's sand arises from his gourd and destroys the first three, before creating a shield to protect him from the rest of the boulders. The sand shield shoots Sand Bullets at Toph, who creates a rock to protect herself from the attack. She then punches her stone shield, which flies towards Gaara's position, just before his sand comes down and destroys it in slow motion. “Oh damn! look at that!” yelled Rainbow Dash. “Talk about dishing out dirt,” said Maud, causing most of the group to laugh and Pinkie Pie to Pout. “How was that funner then my puns,” muttered the pink party pony. Gaara: Interesting. She commands stone as fluently as I control sand. Toph: By the way, I can tell you're using your sand to smash up the ground underneath us for more ammo. Pretty smart for a Sandbender. “Not a sand bender,” corrected Spike. “He’s a ninja!” cheered Pinkie Pie. As Toph talks to Gaara, the camera shows Gaara's sand flowing. Toph then enters a fighting stance. Toph: Too bad I'm gonna kick your butt before you can use any of it! “Go blind Bandit!” cheered Rainbow Dash. “Don’t lose Gaara!” yelled Twilight. Toph uses her Earthbending abilities to create sharp rocks to impale Gaara. Gaara dodges and leaps into the air. Gaara: *groans* I can't underestimate her. Gaara uses the Body Flicker Technique to teleport away. Toph stomps the ground to create a large rock. She jumps up and stands on top of the rock, and then commands the rock to move forward. She brings out her steel rope to strike Gaara. Gaara appears after using his jutsu and stands up. Gaara: I need time. Gaara creates a sphere of sand around him. The whip attaches itself to the shield of sand, unable to penetrate it. “Smart. He can protect himself and come up with a plan,” Starlight said, finding the tactic to be the best at the moment. Toph: Huh? The shield creates spikes on the side the steel rope is connected to. Toph: Woah! Toph jumps off the rock and lets go of the steel rope. The rock slams into the shield and breaks. Toph: Whew. Sorry, grumpy. I'm not ready to be a shish kebab just yet! “I’m getting kind of hungry for some kebabs,”muttered Spike while rubbing his stomach. “We’ll get some after this,” Twilight and Starlight said, feeling hungry as well. Toph creates a sand pillar to flatten Gaara's sand shield. It hits it, but the pillar breaks. Toph: Come on! Are you really that scared of a little blind girl? I'm touched. “Wow this girls feisty,” said Limestone with a grin. “I like it!” She runs at Gaara's sand shield and grabs hold of one of Gaara's spikes. She changes the spike's density to make it much harder, spins it around in her hand, and then slams it into the sand sphere, piercing straight through. Gaara flies out of the back. When he stands up once more, Gaara is wearing his sand armor, and it begins to crack. Gaara: Your eyes. Those are not the eyes of loneliness, like mine. They are... blank. Toph: Impressive insight, "Gloomsville". I'm digging the whole "wearing sand" thing though. That's new! “You know if they weren't fighting to the death i beat they would get along,” said Fluttershy. Limestone gave the yellow pegasus a weird look before going back to watching t.v. “i don’t see it.” (*Cues: Hidden Leaf Village Riverside Theme - Naruto Shippuden: Clash of Ninja Revolution 3*) Gaara flies into the air on a cloud of sand, and begins firing sand bullets at Toph. She summons a rock in front of her and holds it up like a shield. Gaara's sand bullets begin to pummel the rock. However, the rock shatters after receiving too many hits, and she is hit by a barrage of sand. Gaara then uses sand to pick up Toph and restrain her. Toph: Hey! No fair! Gaara: You need your arms to control the Earth. I will remove them! “Cold and straight for the most brutal and efficient strategy,” muttered Starlight. “Just like a true military leader,” stated Twilight. Toph lowers the sand's density from inside, and is able to stick her arm out. She then punches the sand and it transforms into stone. She then shatters it, and is released from Gaara's grip. The stone falls to the ground. Toph: Dream on, creep! It will take a lot more sand than that to take me down! Gaara: That's the plan! Gaara uses sand wave to overwhelm Toph. An enormous amount of sand begins rushing towards Toph. “That might be a problem for the girl,” Rarity said as she saw the large sand wave. “Not good,” Maud said, not showing any reaction. Toph: Oh, crud... “Oh crud indeed,” muttered Applejack. Toph creates two stone pillars to protect herself, and before the sand can reach her, she begins wrapping her steel rope around her body. The enormous wave of sand hits. When it clears, a hole opens up in the ground, and Toph rises up on top of a boulder out of the hole, completely covered in solid steel armor. Gaara: Sand coffin! He traps Toph in a giant coffin of sand. Gaara: Sand Burial! The sand constricts tightly around Toph. No sounds can be heard coming from inside. Gaara spins around to face away from her. Gaara: It is done. “It’s never that easy,” Starlight said, thinking about the fight she had with Twilight in Cloudsdale. The ground begins to tremble. Toph leaps out of the sand, and her steel armor shatters and falls to the ground in mid-air. Toph: Jeez! I almost felt that. Gaara: That's Impossible! Toph: Are you kidding? Pay attention, Sandy. I'm about to school you! “Kick his ass,” cheered the rainbow themed Pegasus. (*Cues: Sansukumi - Naruto: Gekitō Ninja Taisen! 4) Toph assumes a horse stance and begins to yell as if she is powering up. A barrage of boulders begin to rapidly rise up out of the ground. Toph launches them all at Gaara. He uses sand to stop them all. Behind him, Toph rises out of the ground on top of a massive earth column. Six more earth columns rise up out of the ground next to her, surrounding Gaara. Gaara attempts to attack Toph with his sand. Just as it is about to hit her, time slows, and Toph reaches out and redirects the sand so it misses her. The sand loops around the pillars, then turns and starts to rush back towards Toph again. The six earth pillars bend down in front of Toph, protecting her, and the sand slams into them harmlessly. Gaara attempts to recover, but Toph appears behind him on another rock pillar, grabbing Gaara by the neck. He struggles, but he can't break free. Toph: Gotcha... Toph uses sandbending to compress Gaara's sand armor down into his body, crushing him within his own armor. As he lets out one last scream and dies, the camera moves upwards as blood comes out from under the screen. The scene then fades back to Toph, who throws Gaara's sand armor down at the ground. As it hits the ground, it makes the sound of porcelain/glass shattering. Toph: That's how it's done! “He’s not getting up from that,” Maud said, still stoned faced. K.O.! Results (*Cues: A:TLA - Season 3 Main Theme*) Boomstick: Aww, oh (bleep) (bleep) (bleep) (bleep) god-damn (bleep) son of a (bleep) (bleep) weasel! Why did another anime character have to lose?! “Oh wow Boomy’s taking this lost very hard,” said a wide eyed Pinkie Pie. Wiz: Yeah... but, here's why... Gaara's sand is monstrous and its speed and power could easily obliterate most foes, but with Toph, it's another story. Boomstick: Really? She's freaking blind for God's sake, and he can fly! Wiz: Ohoho! In the OFFICIAL "Behind The Scenes extras" of the Avatar: Book 2 DVD we found this... A small caption on the screen says "Did you know? Toph can feel the Earth even if it isn't connected to the ground?" “SERIOUSLY!?” Rainbow shouted, her jaw close to hitting the floor. Wiz: Toph can feel the Earth, even if it isn't connected to the ground. Boomstick: Toph is tough, but her real strength lies in her precision and technique, and with her Earthbending and Seismic Sense, she could see Gaara's attacks coming the instant they began, regardless of if he was in the air. “But unless she can move at the speed of sound or at least close to that she shouldn't be able to dodge it,” said Twilight as she tried to understand the logic behind this outcome. Wiz: And while Gaara's chakra-infused sand is controlled by his late mother, it's still sand. Just like in an Earthbending duel, Toph was able to influence it long enough to misdirect or block attacks. Also remember, Gaara added his father's Gold Dust to the mix, giving Toph two different bending options, just in case. Unlike Platinum, Gold contains traces of Iron and Copper,and can be metal-bent. “So by that logic, Gaara hindered himself in this fight.” Rainbow mused to herself. Boomstick: To top this off, Gaara keeps himself covered in his Sand Armor, so Toph could always sense where he was. “Kinda like in Kratos vs Spawn where he was able to feed of Kratos’ sins since he was covered in them…” Applejack added. Wiz: And it's specifically stated that the Sand Armor uses up large amount of Gaara's own Chakra, not his Mother Sand, so when he ran low on Chakra, it became difficult to maintain. Thus, Toph had no problem turning Gaara's greatest defense into his worst weakness. Boomstick: Gaara couldn't sand up to Toph, Ahaha! I know you're floored, I really ground that one in, didn't I? What can I say, It's my Earthly Delight. "HA GOOD ON BOOMY!" laughed Pinkie Pie. Wiz: Ugh... The winner is Toph Beifong. Boomstick: No need to gravel about it, can't we just bury the hatchet? I'm out. "the puns.... they hurt." said Maud. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Boomstick: Next time on Death Battle! The preview cuts to a scene in space with an orange space ship. “Doesn’t that ship look familiar?” Applejack asked, squinting at the ship. The others, besides the other Pie sisters and Starlight, looked at the ship in interest. The next scene showed another familiar ship behind the orange one. It then cuts to an armored being falling from the sky, onto the ground in a kneeling position. The being slowly looked up, showing a familiar visor. “Wait is that….,” Spike said, watching the preview unfold. Bountyhunter. The group saw a slow shot of a jetpack with a scarf flapping in the wind. Then it showed the opponent's armor and gun as the groups eyes widened Vs Bounty Hunter The following scene showed the opponent and the girls, and dragon, were shocked at who it was. “Boba Fett!!!” Rainbow yelled, flying into the air in shock. They watched as they saw Samus and Boba shooting at each other with explosions going off in the background. Samus gets up from a huge blast as her armor falls off, revealing a skin tight blue suit underneath it. Samus VS Boba Fett! REMASTERED! The main group was left speechless before they broke out in wild cheers. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ “That was interesting,” Maud said flatly, looking at her younger sisters. “You’re damn right that was. Gotta give it to the blind girl, She can really dish out the punishment,” Limestone said, jumping off the couch and landing on the floor. “Hmm,” Marble mumbled, watching Pinkie and the others walking to a glowing box. Limestone saw where the girls were going and asked, “What’re you doing by that box?” “We’re going to the box cause it gives us a lot of free stuff after each episode and we’re going see what’s inside. C’MON,” Pinkie said, hopping towards the box. The sisters of the pink party pony started to walk towards the box as Pinkie hopped towards it and opened it. “What did we receive, darling?” Rarity asked, trying to look into the box. Luckily she wasn’t close as Pinkie popped out of the box and landed next to the fashionista. Not phased by tis, Rarity calmly asked, “Did you find anything?” “I found comics,” Pinkie said, throwing a bunch to everyone. “Oh there were a few other things,” Pinkie said, jumping back into the box. “What is is? Manuals on earthbending?” Twilight asked excitedly. “Scrolls on ninja jutsus?” Rainbow asked, equally as excited as Twilight. “A tanuki?” Fluttershy asked causing everyone to shiver. “Nope. It’s some stuff for my favorite sisters in the whole wide world,” Pinkie said, jumping out of the box with a small sack on her back. “There’s something for us?” Maud asked, showing the very tiniest bit of confusion on her face. “Really? What is it?” Limestone asked, walking to the sack and opening it. Inside the sack was a book, a bag, four thin black bands and a note. “What’s this?” Limestone asked, taking the note and looking at it. “What does it say, Limey?” Pinkie asked, trying to look over Limestone’s shoulder. “Dear Pie Sisters. In this bag there’s one meteor bracelet for each of you, even you Pinkie. The book is for Maud and it’s the earth pony king’s diary. There’s a note in the book for you so read it. And finale for the tough pony reading this note, the bag holds some special rocks and soil from Sunagakure. Hope you enjoy the stuff. Crazy Love, Deadman,” Limestone said, her sisters putting on their bracelets. Maud picks up the book and looks at it as Twilight slowly walks forward and says, “Boooook.” Maud boops the princess on the nose and says, “Bad princess.” That stopped the lavender princess as the rest of the group started to giggle or in Rainbow’s case, fall over laughing. “We might as well get going,” Maud said, getting ready to go. Her sisters were above to walk out the door when Pinkie landed in front of them. “WAIT! You said we would all go to the lake to swim and hang out!” cried Pinkie Pie as she gave her sisters a pout. “Damn i hope you would of forgot,” muttered Limestone. “To late we might as well go…” said Maud, much to pinkie’s joy and lime’s annoyance. (later at the lake) We find the group at the lake enjoying the sun and taking a nice dip in the lake. Well most of the group was, Maud simply sat under the beach umbrella that Spike was kind enough to provide her as she read her new book. Like the note suggested she went to the last page. “After giving my throne to my younger brother, I went to search of my rival, the blind bandit, to end our rivalry once and for all. Of course she was at her usual spot, where she trained, and we started our fight. It was a fight I knew would end in her favor, but I decided to put everything into a trump card so to say. I would end our rivalry with one simple question." (15o0 years ago.) “Would you marry me?” asked a pale colored equine with a red mane and wearing brown robes fit for a king. “Wha? What did you say Gloomsville?” said a grey earth pony with a black mane as she stared at the equine with her milky colored eyes. The boulder next to her fell to the ground, creating a sizable crater. (back to the present.) Maud had an amused Smile as she continued to read. “I’ll never forget the look on her face and the blush she had. She began to sputter while calling me a fool for asking such a question during battle. I told her i didn’t care and wanted an answer even if i had to defeat her to get it.” “She agreed after going on how it was out of pity because in her words “a gloomy guy like me would never have a chance with a girl otherwise.” We agreed to leave my old kingdom behind and head to the new kingdom of equestria where we would settle down. I hear Rock farming was a good option for earth Ponies.” Maud stared at the last page for a moment before closing it and putting it in her saddle bags. With nothing else to do, she saw a few small rocks near her and had an interesting thought. Maud held out her hoof towards the rocks and they started to float and then turn into turn into sand. “Hmm.” hummed Maud in thought before she heard her sister Limestone’s foul mouth cursing from the Lake. with a sigh she got up to see what happen and on her way she could only wonder why Limestone had to inherit their great (add in a few more greats) grandmother Toph’s foul temper. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ CHAPTER END! NEXT TIME-TIME-TIME!!!!!!!! (ERROR!) “Hahahaha next chapters a surprise kiddies!” laughed deadman now wearing a suit straight from the 80’s. a light gray unbuttoned suit with a maroon undershirt with the first three buttons unbuttoned. “Did you really have to do that?.... And have to wear that stupid getup?” asked Trepp. “HEY! YOU WILL RESPECT THE SAME SUIT THAT THE GREAT KAZUMA KIRYU WEARS!” yelled the mad god. “Sigh… anyway we will be doing a none reaction chapter next just to do something new and fun so we don’t get bored,” said the bored chaos god. “And with that we-” “Goodnight mutherfuckers! Ahhhhh!!!!!!” screamed that mad god as he rammed his face into the camera causing the screen to show nothing but static.
Boba Fett VS Samus Aran RemasteredA brand new day, that meant Twilight and her friends were getting ready to watch the next episode. They were just finishing up with setting their snack table as each of them took a seat. “Is everyone ready for the next episode?” Twilight inquired, looking at all of her friend’s excited faces. Before anypony or dragon could say anything, a strange magical hum was heard, causing them to look at the mirror portal. The girls, one dragon and a plushie holding a small BFG were standing there, ready to fight off anything that walks though it. A moment later, a unicorn mare with a light ember coat and a red and yellow mane walked through the mirror. “Sunset?” Twilight inquired, shocked at who it was. “Hey, Twilight. How’s it going?” Sunset questioned, walking towards her princess friend. “I’m surprised you’re here, Sunset. Why’re you here? Is something wrong?” Twilight rambled, flying towards her friend in worry. “Everything’s fine, Twilight. I just needed to get out of the house for awhile and thought that I could stay here for a bit,” Sunset reassured, calming down her friend. “I have the sirens at my place and they’re all on their periods.” “How bad can it be?” Spike inquired, shrugging his shoulders. “Well…” trailed off Sunset as she thought back on how bad it was that it made her have to leave. ~~~~~~~~~~~{an hour ago in the human world, outside Sunset’s apartment.}~~~~~~~~~~~ “RAAAWR!” bellowed three voices that sounded like the unholy offspring of Godzilla passing a kidney stone and Scott Mcneil(1) with such intensity that it shook the apartment building. Standing in front of said building was one wide eyed Sunset who was sweating buckets. “Nope!” said the baconed haired girl as she quickly made her way to somewhere safe. She wondered how her friend Twilight was doing and if she was willing to let her crash for a bit until things cooled down. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ “Let’s just say i’d rather spend time fighting dragons and leave it to that,” muttered the former student of Celestia right before getting swept into a near bone crushing hug from Twilight. “Oooh! Who cares about why you're here!?” said the Princess of friendship. “It’s been so long since we saw each other, let’s just enjoy the time we have.” “Sure, so what’re you doing here? Shouldn’t you be outside or something?” Sunset wondered, looking at all the pony versions of her friends. “We’re gonna watch Death Battle,” Pinkie cheered, jumping in the air and waving her hooves. “Death Battle? You’ve got my interest,” Sunset mentioned, grinning at the title alone as she followed Twilight to the couch. “C’mon and watch with us. As Pinkie would say,” Twilight began, taking a seat as Sunset did the same. “The more the merrier,” Sunset and Twilight quoted before giggling. Spike sighed and pressed play on the remote, starting the next episode. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ For Inspiring us For Encouraging us For Teaching us We Dedicate this to you Monty Oum ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ “Huh? Who's this Monty guy?” asked a confused Rainbow Dash. “Don’t know but he must be somepony important if their dedicate this episode to him.” said Twilight with a shrug. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Interlude (*Cues: Invader - Jim Johnston*) Boomstick: Bounty hunting, one of the most respected and fun jobs in the world. “This guy has a very bizarre idea of fun…” Sunset sighed before giving it more thought. ‘Though it DOES sound kinda fun.’ “And my cousin Braeburn says some bounty hunter are just as wanted then the varmints they bring in,” said Applejack. Wiz: I don't know about respected, but certainly a daring profession only for the strong and bold. Boomstick: Boba Fett, the most feared bounty hunter in the galaxy. Wiz: And Samus Aran, a hunter so determined she'll sacrifice a planet to reach her goal. “More like planets tend to explode the moment she gets what she wants out of it…” Twilight added. Boomstick: He's Wiz and I'm Boomstick. Wiz: And it's our job to analyze their weapons, armor, and skills to find out who would win... a Death Battle. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Boba Fett (*Cues: Unknown Theme*) Wiz: Boba Fett is a natural in more ways than one. He was not born into the galaxy, rather, created, as a clone of the fearsome bounty hunter Jango Fett. Boomstick: Not fearsome enough, though. He tended to get a-head of himself...Hehehe… “Oh for the love of-show some tact you jerk!” Sunset snapped upon seeing the Bounty Hunter's father meet his untimely demise. “I thought you liked puns,” said a confused Applejack. Sunset gave the farm pony a side glance. “Only when they're in good taste,” she muttered. Wiz: As his "father", Jango taught Boba all he knew about his profession, and despite being orphaned at age ten, Boba continued to live the hunter's life, eventually donning his father's armor and claiming his rightful place as the greatest bounty hunter in the galaxy. Background Age: 35 (Cannon)/76 (Legends) Height: 6'0" / 1.83 m Weight: 172 lbs / 78.2 kg Rank: Mandalore Starship: Slave I Homeworld: Kamino Clone of Jango Fett Widower to Sintas Vel Father to Ailyn Vel Boomstick: Complete with the most badass space-suit ever, his Mandalorian armor. “Daddy must be so proud…” Spike stated. “I’ll say!” said Sunset with a wide grin as she admired the armor. “Uh Sunset, your drooling…” muttered Fluttershy. (*Cues: The Battle of Hoth (Part 1) - Star Wars Episode V*) Boomstick: It's got a micro energy field that disperses impacts, and is made up of Mandalorian iron. Wiz: Okay, at this point, I think it's safe to assume every universe has some metal stronger than titanium. Though, to this one's credit, it's actually a lot heavier, sacrificing mobility for durability. In fact, it's so durable it resists lightsabers... you know, the swords that can cut through anything. “Man that's still so cool!” cheered Rainbow Dash as she admired the suit and imagine kicking flank in it. Mandalorian Body Armor Made of Mandalorian Iron Micro energy field Penetrating radar Resists fire, poison, acid, & cold 360 degrees field of vision Infrared sensor Environmental filter Can track 30+ targets at once Retractable drinking straw (*Cues: Unknown Theme*) Boomstick: His gauntlets house a flamethrower, fiber cord whip, and numerous concussion and stun missiles. But his weapon of choice is his EE-3 carbine rifle, which Fett often cradles like a child. There there, EE. Daddy's here. Killin' time soon. Wiz (and Twilight): That's... creepy. ‘That reminds me I have to tuck Gladys in tonight before going to bed,’ thought sunset as she thought of her precious Springfield Armory M1911A1. ‘Also need to watch Sin city again, That movie is lit as fuck~!’ she sang in her head as she continued watching the show. Weaponry EE-3 carbine rifle Sacros K-11 blaster pistol Concussion grenade launcher Lightsabers Wrist Gauntlets Flame projector Fibre Cord whip Wrist laser Concussion rockets Stun rockets (*Cues: Star Wars: The Clone Wars - Sky Battle of Quell*) Boomstick: However, my favorite thing in Boba's bag is his badass jetpack. “Ah ya flying for the win!” cheered Rainbow Dash, leaping in the air and doing a backflip. “Show off,” muttered an annoyed Applejack “You're just mad because you don't have one.”mocked the blue flyer. Wiz: Which he uses for short-range travel, and to gain a mobility advantage over his foes. While it can only hold enough fuel for a single minute's worth of flight, its velocity reaches up to 90 miles per hour. Mitronomon Z-6 Jetpack Hands-free Up to one minute of flight Max speed: 90 mph / 145 kph Magnetic Grappling hook Anti-vehicle homing rocket “Pssshh. C’mon and give me some real G-force,” Rainbow mocked, crossing her hooves. “Oh Twilight…” Pinkie began. “I don't suppose you could build me one of those jet packs…” “No Pinkie.” said the young Princess. Boomstick: The jetpack also has a single anti-vehicle homing missile, because when you've got space for a missile, why not? “Because the world needs more explosions,” stated Spike in a sage like voice getting some cheers from the more wild members of the group. “Speak the truth bratha!” yelled Pinkie as she gave Spike a high five… and to those in the comments telling me i’m using the wrong term because one of them is a pony and doesn't have hands, then you can just bite me. Wiz: In short, Boba Fett is a human swiss army knife. He's killed hundreds of criminals, politicians, and Jedi, and battled Mace Windu to a draw when he was only 12 years old. Boomstick: An accomplishment so manly, it instantly kick-started his puberty. “That would happen to anybody,” agreed Sunset, because a 12 year old fighting Samuel Jackson from space is probably one of the most badass things out there. “Don’t you mean ANYPONY?” asked Twilight with a raised brow. “Fuck you i know my terminology!” shot back Sunset, surprising most of the group with her sudden change in attitude. ‘Fuck i’m acting like church again!’ the former apprentice of Celestia panicked in her mind. (*Cues: Unknown Theme*) Wiz: But for all his skill, Fett has one great, inescapable weakness: the Sarlacc Pit. This flaw is so unavoidable, he was knocked into the pit by a blind and physically drained Han Solo while wearing a jetpack. Boomstick: And since Disney bought Star Wars and nixed the expanded universe, this is where Boba Fett's story officially ends. “Wait, seriously!?” Rainbow groaned. “THAT SUCKS!!” Sunset cried in outrage. “RIOT!” yelled Pinkie while brandishing a pitchfork. “You are not starting another riot in my Castle Pinkie!” yelled Twilight, horn blazing with energy. (*Transition appears*) Wiz: Well, that's stupid, so here's what happened in the expanded universe! “YES!!!” Sunset and Rainbow cheered. (*Transition disappears*) (*Cues: Star Wars: The Clone Wars - Duel of the Droids*) Wiz: Using a combination of his jetpack and blowing himself up, Fett actually escaped the Sarlacc, he later became leader of the Mandalorian warriors after the Galactic Civil War, and even held his own against Darth Vader.... twice. “Ok, we've GOT to see this Vader guy in this show soon!” Starlight stated. “Agreed. I’m curious about him as well,” Twilight commented, wondering what the black wearing person’s story could be. Boomstick: While using one of several lightsabers he's taken from his Jedi kills, and that's pretty goddamn impressive, but you know what's even more impressive? The time he trained Han Solo's Jedi daughter so that she could kill an evil all-powerful Sith Lord, who just so happened to be her own brother! Spoilers. “Glade my Twilight isn't here, she hasn’t read anything from the expanded universe yet,” muttered Sunset. Boomstick:Unfortunately, Fett's greatest weakness still remains that toothy sand vagina. “Snrk!” Sunset tried and failing at the name Boomstick gave the Sarlacc pit. (*Cues: Star Wars Episode V - Departure of Boba Fett (Boba Fett's Theme)*) Wiz: He has fallen into the Sarlacc a total of three times... three. And the Sarlacc's not exactly running around looking for snacks. It's a friggin' hole in the ground! “That's just stupid.” said Applejack with a flat look. “Who could be that stupid to fall in the same hole three times?” asked Rarity. “Oh you would be surprised…” muttered Sunset as she thought of a certain group of morons in space located in a boxed canyon. Boomstick: And again, he can fly! Fun fact: Every year following his escape, Boba Fett returns to the planet Tatooine just to shoot the Sarlacc. In his spaceship. From orbit. He's learned his lesson, he's staying as far away from that shit as he possibly can. Everyone couldn't help but chuckle at this. “Can we all just agree that we might do something similar if we were in his shoes?” Giggled Starlight. “Hahaha, ya.” laughed Spike wiping away a tear. Wiz: Fear of teethy holes aside, few have survived once he's set his sights on them. Boba Fett is a whole new meaning of deadly. Darth Vader: No disintegrations. Boba Fett: As you wish. “Aw, but I wanna disintegrate them!” Said Rainbow in a mock Boba Fett voice. “No, bad Boba! No disintegration!”Sunset replied in her own mock Darth Vader voice, playfully hitting her with a newspaper. Everyone couldn't help but giggle at the antics of the two. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Samus Aran (*Cues: Title Screen Theme - Metroid: Other M*) Wiz: When she was young, Samus Aran lived with her family on Earth colony K-2L... until one fateful day it was sacked by an army of space pirates led by the vile Ridley, a giant purple space dragon. “Looks like a fucked up Pterodactyl to me,” said Sunset off handedly before looking the real purple dragon in the room. “Or maybe a grown up Spike on meth.” “Hey!” yelled said dragon, he didn’t even know what meth was. Boomstick: Ridley murdered her parents right in front of her along with the rest of the planet. Literally everyone except for Samus. So PTSD therapists were in pretty short supply. “I'd love to see Ember put this jerk in his place!” Spike scoffed, mentally picturing his friend wailing on the evil space dragon with her scepter. Wiz: Thankfully, Samus was rescued by the Chozo, bird-like aliens who raised her to become a warrior. Background Age: 32 Height: 6'3" / 1.9 m Weight: 198 lbs / 89.8 kg Homeworld: Colony K-2L Starship: Gunship Cybernetically enhanced Infused with Chozo & Metroid DNA (*Cues: Theme of Samus Aran - Super Smash Bros. Wii U*) Wiz: She was infused with Chozo DNA, increasing her strength, speed, and athletic abilities far beyond those of a normal human being. Boomstick: So... does she like... now have a bad habit of pecking at food and shitting on people's' cars? “I certainly hope not,” Rarity groaned, shaking her head in irritation. Wiz: No. She wears the Power Suit, typically in Varia form, shielding her entire body without restricting any movement or flexibility. Power Suit Little restriction to movement or flexibility Variants Varia - Environmental protection Gravity - Stimulates normal gravity Dark - Reduces Dark Aether damage Light - Immune to Dark Aether Fusion - Absorbs X Parasites Zero - Worn underneath Power Suit Boomstick: Too bad it makes her look like a dude. “Yeah, and her zero suit looks so… *licks lips*good~,” said Sunset as she started to stare off into space. “Umm sunset? You ok?” asked a worried Spike as he snapped his fingers in front of her face to get her attention. Through the young dragons efforts Sunset was able to snapped out of her little day dream and give the group a sheepish smile. “Sorry about that, i was just thinking… happy thoughts,” said Sunset with a small blush. “What did the human world do to you?” asked a weirded out Starlight, wondering what happened in the other world that changed Sunset from the pony she hung out with during her time in the human world. “More like what DIDN’T it do to her?” joked Pinkie. Getting a few sighs or some blushing faces for her efforts, but Sunset’s reaction was the most… interesting. “Bow chicka wow wow~!” Sang Sunset before she cover her mouth with a wide eyed look. “What in the hay was that?” asked Applejack with a raised brow. “And why do i have a sudden urge to punch something aqua colored?” Growled out Rarity…. Prompting Rainbow Dash to move away... Wiz: Though underneath, she wears the skintight Zero Suit. Boomstick: There we go! They must call it that because there's literally zero left to the imagination. “Mmm… indeed it does~” Sunset whispered to herself, imagining Twilight wearing such an outfit… right before shaking her head. “Dear Fausticorn I've been hanging around Adagio too long…” Spike let out a quick whistle when Samus in her Zero suit was shown, then immediately blushed when he heard most of the group giggle at the young drake's reaction to the beautiful bounty hunter. “Hehehe what can i say? she’s pretty.” said the drake with a blush. “Agreed,” whispered Fluttershy quietly, but apparently not quietly enough if the grin and knowing look Sunset was sending her way was any indication. Boomstick: While in that Zero Suit, she carries a paralyzer pistol, a gun which... can... well... paralyze people. And turn into a laser whip. “Crack dat whip!” Applejack cheered, earning a giggle from Starlight. Wiz: But she definitely prefers the Power Suit in most combat situations. As a modified version of Chozo battle armor developed specifically for Samus, it can also be upgraded to adapt to any environment. “Wish we had that kind of armor,” Spike and Rainbow grumbled while crossing their arms and hooves respectively… while Twilight, Starlight, and Sunset started taking down notes. (*Cues: Brinstar (Metroid) - SSB Wii U*) Boomstick: Samus carries the powerful Arm Cannon as her primary weapon and she's found quite a few upgrades for it over the years. So the basic power beam is a peashooter. When you charge it up, it'll blow your face clean off. She can also set it to blast an ice beam, grapple beam, and tons of seeking and super missiles. Arsenal Arm Cannon Power Beam Charge Beam Ice Beam Grapple Beam Missiles Wiz: Her Chozo training let's Samus control the skies with her speedy screw attack and curl into her morph ball form to traverse places few others can. Morph Ball Diameter: 3 ft / 1 m Power Bombs Screwattack Speed Booster Paralyzer pistol Boomstick: How the hell does she do that?! “Several decades of yoga?” Sunset suggested. “Why would you think that?” asked Twilight. “Well that's what Adagio says when she explains her flexibility,” explained Sunset with a perverted grin. “...oh my,” muttered Fluttershy while being a blushing mess like the rest of the group, save for Rainbow Dash, who had a wide shit-eating grin... Wiz: Bird DNA, Boomstick. Bird DNA. Boomstick: Yeah, because we all know how many times you scare a bird in the parking lot and then it just curls up into a ball and zooms away! Wiz: ALIEN bird DNA. “Maybe it's a Bird-Hedgehog hybrid?” Fluttershy suggested. Boomstick: Well then F**k that planet and its birds! But I do like their power bombs, which Samus carries and can be used to destroy anything in the general vicinity in seconds. Wiz: Samus is known as a bounty hunter capable of taking on impossible missions, fighting massive beasts, and even wiping out an entire species. Boomstick: All but one. Talk about having the rarest pet in the universe, and it makes a cute hat. “It looks cute enough,” Fluttershy muttered, seeing the baby metroid. “Not sure if I want that for a hat though,” Sunset admitted, shivering a little at the sight of the metroid’s teeth. “Yeah, it looks like something that would suck out your brain.” Pinkie added. Wiz: However, she often makes mistakes. Somehow, she always seems to lose all her power-ups and upgrades at the beginning of every mission. “Thats… so stupid,” muttered Sunset. “How do you lose all of those every time you went on a mission? Who was she, Kratos?!” Boomstick: How has she not gotten a purse yet? “How have you not learn to shut the fuck up yet?” spat Rarity, ya she was sore from that comment from the first episode. Wiz: Well even when she does have all her arsenal at her disposal, it doesn't guarantee its use. For example, she once entered a volcano and did not activate her thermal systems until halfway through the mission. All because she was waiting for permission. Everyone slapped their heads at Samus’s obvious weakness. “Are you kidding!?” Rainbow snapped. “As someone who works with the Wonderbolts I know it's imperative that you follow the orders of your superiors. But even WE know that there are times we need to make spur-of-the-moment decisions in life or death situations!” Boomstick: Ugh, can we please not talk about that game? Wiz: But don't worry. Samus has proven time and time again to be one of the deadliest hunters in the galaxy. Outlaws everywhere fear the name of Samus Aran. Samus: Time to go! Samus' visor shines, covering her face, and she prepares her arm cannon, which fires a charge shot at the screen. “SO…. AWESOME!” cheered Rainbow Dash. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ “Call me biased, but I think Samus will win this one.” Rainbow proclaimed, while the rest of the group talked amongst themselves. “Well the rest of us believe that this fight will end just like the original episode so we're just going to watch the show,” declared Twilight as everyone else settled down to enjoy the show. “I just what to see a bloodbath,” said Sunset with a shrug, and magic herself some popcorn. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Death Battle (*Cues: Unknown Theme*) Samus' ship is flying in the middle of space. Samus sits in the cockpit, looking over a green virtual screen. From behind comes Slave I, where inside Boba Fett is looking over a virtual screen of his own. Suddenly, Samus hears an alarm going off in her ship, but is too late to act, for Slave I has fired multiple blasts at Samus' ship, which is disabled and is send falling towards an unknown planet. On the planet's surface, it appears to be a futuristic city. “Huh? it’s starting out just like the first version,” commented Twilight as soon a she noticed the similarities between the two versions. “But prettier,” added Fluttershy as she was dazzled by the visual upgrade. Planet Name: Unknown Location: Unknown Life Forms: Unknown “Wow… that’s... some helpful information,” said Starlight wondering why the show bothered to show the info if it was all unknown. Samus' ship crashes through a small tower, then crash lands onto a rooftop, grinding across before flipping over and falling off. The entire vehicle explodes, but Samus had jumped out just in time, landing on the rooftop while leaving a small crater. She gets up and turns behind her at the fiery wreckage of her ship. “Oh he’s so dead.” stated Sunset with a glare. If there was one thing that Sunset learned ever since she started to live in the human world besides that cute nerdy girls where all screamer in bed, NEVER fuck with someone’s ride. Boba Fett, who had parked Slave I, hovers downward with his jetpack with his EE-3 carbine rifle in his hands and lands. He walks slowly towards Samus while she prepares her arm cannon. “Kick his ass Samus!” cheered Rainbow Dash while pooling a “go go Samus” number 1 glove out of nowhere, she’d even got one for Fluttershy who shyly waved her arm in support of the female bounty hunter, even the Doomguy Plushie was holding a Samus flag in it’s little arms. FIGHT! Samus charges her arm cannon, then fires a shot and follows up with two more. Boba Fett steps to the side to avoid them, then fires back. Samus rolls out of the way and fires a large beam from her arm cannon, but Boba Fett flies up into the air with his jetpack to avoid it. Suspending himself in midair, he continues firing downward at Samus, who runs toward him while avoiding his fire. In response, he launches his anti-vehicle homing rocket from his jetpack at her. As it is about to hit, Samus vaults over a part of the building, narrowly dodging the rocket as it explodes, destroying the very object she used. “EXPLOSIONS!” cheered Pinkie Pie as she and Spike marveled at the explosions. “Suck it Michael Bay you bush league Director,” snarked Sunset. To tell the truth it was just an excuse to rib on said Director. Samus leaps into the air towards Boba Fett and strikes him with her left arm, then flips over and kicks him downward towards the rooftop below them. Boba quickly gets back onto his feet as Samus herself lands. She fires another beam at Boba, who jumps and flips over to avoid it before firing a missile at her. Samus rolls to avoid it, then goes into her morph ball form. He continues to fire more missiles at Samus, but her morph ball mode proves too nimble to be hit. Once Samus reaches Fett, she exits morph ball mode and flip kicks him twice, the second of which Fett appears to have blocked. Despite this, her next kick knocks Fett into the air, sending him rolling across the rooftop that Slave I is on while dropping his rifle. However, Fett lets go of a grenade pin upon stopping his movement and Samus soon sees a thermal detonator at her feet about to detonate. It explodes, causing a massive explosion. “Oh shit! Is Fett actually going to win!?” yelled a surprised Rainbow Dash. “I goess we were wrong in assuming it was going to be the same outcome.” muttered Applejack. “Don’t think it’s over just yet,” said Fluttershy, drawing everyone's attention back to the show. However, the explosion did not defeat his opponent; it seriously damaged her armor, revealing her Zero Suit, (Much to Spike,Fluttershy, and Sunset’s delight.) to which Boba Fett realizes that Samus is a woman. After all of her armor pieces, save for her boots, have broken off from her, Samus leaps upward with her boots, whose jets allow her to hover and lands on the rooftop Fett is on. She then takes out her paralyzer pistol, to which Boba Fett responds by taking out and activating a lightsaber, then twirling it. Samus fires her paralyzer pistol at him, but Fett manages to deflect them efficiently as he runs toward her. Samus decides to fly towards him using her boots, preparing to kick just as Fett swings his lightsaber. The two clash and the impact knocks both back. “Wow this is way more intense,” muttered Rarity as most of the group was fixated on the fight. ‘This is getting almost as good as the three way fight with Tex, Washington, and the Meta.’ thought Sunset as she thought back on the show her and her friends were watching back home. Samus quickly transforms her paralyzer pistol into her laser whip, though it takes on the form of a beam sword. The two clash with their sabers with neither seeming to have the edge, so Boba prepares his wrist-mounted flamethrower. He fires large waves of fire at Samus, who leaps over, rolls, and jumps to avoid them. Fett continues firing it as Samus wall jumps off of Slave I. In midair, she changes her laser whip back into the paralyzer pistol and fires it at Fett's wrist, disabling his wrist-mounted flamethrower. Upon landing, she transforms the pistol back into a beam sword and the two clash with their blades once again until Samus leaps over a swing and kicks Fett. She gets into a crouched position, charges her paralyzer pistol and fires the ice beam at Fett, who is completely frozen in place by it. She charges her paralyzer pistol, then fires it at Fett's head, causing it to explode, which is shown at three different angles. Afterward, Samus gets up and turns away. “Huh so it did end the same way,” muttered Twilight while everyone else was cheering like crazy. K.O.! “Samus wins!” cheered Rainbow Dash as she did a flying backflip. Samus Aran walks away as Boba's headless body completely shatters into pieces. “Man Boba should of kept a COOL HEAD in this fight,” joked Sunset as everyone else groaned at the Pun. “Faust dammet Sunset,” muttered Twilight. “Heheh~! You’re pain feeds me and my Puns,” said Sunset with a impish grin. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Results (*Cues: Ending (Metroid) - SSB Wii U*) Wiz: Fett put up a fight to the best of his abilities, but Samus' superior technology and athletic skills trumped him in every way. “She was holding all the cards in this fight,” said Applejack with a nod at Wiz’s explanation. Boomstick: While Fett may be more durable and physically stronger, Samus has dealt with foes like that all her life. Wiz: Boba Fett really didn't have the means necessary to catch Samus, let alone perfectly counter Samus' power bomb, screwattack, and ice beam. “True since his weapons were either lasers or explosives,” Starlight commented, stroking her chin. “Makes it hard to dodge those bombs when Samus was running all over the place,” Rainbow added. Boomstick: Sure, Boba's killed plenty of Jedi and survived a run-in with Vader, but his greatest victories usually stemmed from his cunning. He's a master of playing his enemies into his hands. “Reminds me of how Sunset used to do things back when we first met,” said Twilight thinking back on the days where Sunset was just another enemy, but now she was one of her closest friends. “Ya… how i "used" to do things,” said Sunset with a nervous Smile. Wiz: But when it comes to Samus, Fett had little to work with. Samus specifically modeled her bounty hunter career around anonymity. She's even commonly mistaken as a man by the very people who want to hire her, making it extremely difficult for Boba Fett to get a read on her. Boomstick: Fett just couldn't keep his head in the game. “HA!” laughed Sunset. “I thought you hated Puns when used in poor taste,” questioned Starlight. “Dead parent jokes and dead kid jokes and rape jokes are where i draw the like,” explained Sunset. Causing everyone to agree with her standards. Wiz: The winner is Samus Aran. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Boomstick: Next time on Death Battle. The first thing they saw is a pair of legs shown before some words appear. YOU THOUGHT HE WAS UNMATCHED The camera changes to a badass man wearing a trenchcoat, cowboy hat and his cool beard. YOU THOUGHT HE HAD NO EQUAL Soon it transitioned to a Japanese man wearing a white training gi with his arms cross with a stern look on his face. YOU NEVER MET ... SEGATA “Oh this is going to rock,” said Spike with a massive Grin. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ (*RWBY-shine*) Zero Suit Samus, with a woman to her right in a Pink and black combat latex outfit, and a woman in green and black armor very much similar to Master Chief's armor color scheme started out as they had one hand on their hips, and motioned their free hand up slowly. They did it with both hands as they closed it together until the beat drops to where it does a close up of each shot of the women then cuts to two stormtroopers dancing as they moved their arms around. It cuts back to Samus and the other two woman as three stormtroopers are in the back joining in on the dance routine as they danced a bit faster as the motioned facing slightly away as they moved their legs and arms in a downward motion. “... am i on drugs again?” asked Sunset, confused as all hell right now. “You’ve done drugs?!!” Twilight yellowed, looking at her other worldly friend. “Blame Adagio,” Sunset confessed. It cuts to Boba Fett doing half of the waving dance as he spins around. In the background is Deadpool on one knee moving his arms to beat as three stormtroopers started to do the same moves from earlier. It cuts back to ZSS and the woman again as they started to dance more frantically as they shimmed in both directions after a twirl, then proceeding to do a faint as they quirked their legs around. “The choreography is outstanding. The music is superb, the dance is exotic,” Rarity mentioned, watching the dance. “The outfits are so entrancing,” Sunset muttered, looking at the dancing girls while taking a glance at Deadpool’s body. Deadpool joins ZSS as he copies her earlier movements with two troopers in the background. It cuts to the three woman again with more storm troopers in the back copying her motion as she slowed down her dance; motioning her body and arms to the lyrics to the song. Sunset paid very close attention to the solo dancer as Twilight sighed and shook her head at her friend’s antics Shortly after it shows Deadpool and Samus again as they showed off more dance moves until it cuts to Deathstroke doing his version of a breakdance, which is him doing flips while doing a dance moves on his hand with Boba Fett in the background continuing his waving dance. It then shows Samus in her armor with Deathstroke on the left, Deadpool on the right, and finally Boba Fett in the background as they were slightly crouched as the danced at a fast pace, ending with them close to a sit down position as it cuts back to ZZS and girls, this time having Samus in her armor and even more storm troopers as they did a freestyle dance in rhythm. It cuts to ZZS in a circle with regular stormtroopers as they freestyle in a fast pace with her. “Go Girls. Shake what your Mama gave you,” Pinkie cheered, dancing to the beat of the music. Her friends laughed at her while Sunset could only smile and watch the troopers dance. It shows off Deadpool getting into a break dance as Deathstroke did the same moments later; ending off with him on his forearm as he made a pose. Boba Fett does the same only he finishes the break dance by jumping in the air, momentarily folding his legs before getting his feet back onto the ground, and posing in a crouch stance. “Ok that was impressive,” said Starlight impressed. It cuts to a wide screen Television in the background as it showed off the death battle from earlier with the sword fight with Samus and Boba Fett, cutting to other shows ranging from Red Vs Blue, RWBY, and other dance routines. Each time it changed a clip; so would the dancers on the ground from ZZS, stormtroopers, the women from earlier, Deadpool doing a break dance, Boba fett and Deathstroke. Sunset’s eyes went wide when she saw the familiar color coordinated soldiers she grew to love and hate. Suddenly, it shows Godzilla with a zoom, then goes to the ground as people continued their dance, then zoomed out to Godzilla bobbing his head as Gamera was spinning upside down with disco colors coming out from the inner parts of his shell like a Disco ball thus ending the dance as it cuts to a quote. “Gamera!?” Rainbow Dash yelled/squealed in surprise/joy. “Growth is awkward, in retrospect kind of embarrassing, hardly appreciating how important they were but in the end ultimately necessary.” As the words fade away, a white symbol appears on the bottom right corner showing the same name from the beginning of the video saying "Monty Oum 1981-2015" “What’s that suppose to mean?” Spike wondered, reading the message. “I believe it means that while growth brings about change no matter how you may not want it,” Twilight explained, rubbing her chin. “Whoever this Monty was, he was a wise man,” Sunset commented, bowing her head in respect. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ “Gotta say, this was a fun,” Sunset mentioned, getting off the couch with everyone else. “And you girls watch this everyday?” “Well not everyday, but we do see it whenever we can,” Twilight explained, leading her friend towards the box. “But this is far from over. We still have one more thing to do before we start the next episode.” “Oh? And what’s that suppose to mean?” Sunset inquired, stopping in front of the box ad looking at it curiously. “Also what’s with the box?” “It came with the DVDs and after every episode we get free stuff depending on who’s on the episode. We got some gundam models and Spike even got his own grappling hook,” Pinkie cheered, bouncing in one spot. “Free stuff? Why didn't you say so. Let’s open the box and see what we got,” Sunset cheered, watching Pinkie open the box. The pink party pony stuck her head and hooves inside the box, rummaging around for something. A moment later Pinkie emerges from the box as Rarity asked, “Did you find anything?” “You betcha,” Pinkie gushed, pulling out lots of books and a few figurines. “These were in there for all of us,” Pinkie explained, giving everyone their own share. “These look mighty interesting,” Applejack muttered, looking at the Metroid graphic novel. It seemed like a decent thing to read or to give to Applebloom. “I believe Sweetie Bell might want this,” Rarity exclaimed, holding up a Samus Figurine while Fluttershy hugged a metroid plushie. “and Dashie got this!” cheered Pinkie as she presented said Pegasus with a replica of Boba Fett’s very own Mandalorian armor… in pony form of course. “Aww Yeah. Now that’s what I’m talking about,” Rainbow cheered, putting on the armor piece by piece. A moment later, the group saw a pony version of Boba Fett standing there and yelling, “This is awesome.” Pinkie was about to cheer, but noticed a wrapped package in the box. “There’s still one more thing,” Pinkie announced, holding up the package and looking at the name on it. “It’s your’s Sunset,” Pinkie cheered, giving the package to the confused unicorn. “Really? What is it,” Sunset wondered, using her magic to open the package as two things fell out. Lifting the two things up with telekinesis, Sunset saw that the things were actually two zero suits like Samus’s with one being dark purple and the other being a light blue in color. Sunset took a closer look and saw that the suits were in her’s and Twilight’s sizes. “I know what I’m doing when I get home,” Sunset muttered, stuffing the suits in a bag. “Anyways, it’s getting late and I better get back home,” Sunset mentioned, walking towards the mirror as the others went their own ways home. “Don’t worry, Sunset. You can stay with us for the night,” Twilight suggested, walking behind her friend. “I’ll be fine,” Sunset insisted, waving her hoof. “Nonsense. We can have Spike set up a room for you,” Twilight “Yeah. Not like we don’t have the room here,” Spike pointed out. Jumping on Twilight’s back with his grappling hook. “I guess I can stay awhile,” Sunset relented, turning away from the mirror. She figured it wouldn’t do much harm to have a vacation. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ CHAPTER END! Next time…. Well we’re going on break so we’re going to take a rain check on that, but hey~ RvB sometime soon i Guess… so y~a see ya guys sometime in the future. Until next time thanks goes out to Alpha and Trepp as co-authors and to Rising Thunder for writing out the dance scene!
prologueWithin the vast emptiness of space two beings of great power and infinite wisdom gathered to talk about subjects of such great importance and complexity that we mere mortals could never hope to comprehend. “This is the stupidest idea ever…of all time.” drawled one of the “grand” beings. A creature that took the appearance of a human shaped mass of blue energy wearing a nice black business suit and giving off an air of boredom. This entity was known as Trepp, the being of tamed mischief, he overlooked the more controlled forms of chaos and makes sure nothing gets too out of hand. “I’m telling you Trepp this will be the best way to relieve our boredom yet.” proclaimed a being of fire that was restrained by a straight jacket and chains. This creature was named “DEADMAN!™.” he ruled over insane mischief and his job consisted of watching over the more random form of chaos. His form of chaos brought the most danger but also the most change in whatever world he visited. …….. Yeeeaaah. Anyways as i was saying, these great beings of mischief and chaos where known throughout the multiverse as the “bumbling duo”. A pair of chaos gods who go around messing with worlds governed by other gods of chaos. They were Infamous for going world to world leaving something that didn’t belong and having it change the world for better or worst. “Ya It’s like the the narrator said! This is our thing!” proclaimed the insane ball of fire. Completely shattering the fourth wall with it’s comment. “Sigh…. I wish you would stop breaking the fourth wall like that.” muttered the bored being of chaos (HA IRONY!). “You know it angers the beings of order when you ignore the boundaries set by the other gods.” he drawled. “Oh please! You worry too much.” replied the living inferno, completely brushing his fellow ruler of mischief’s concern aside. Showing that he was dead set on going through with whatever plan he had cooked up. “Besides if they haven't done anything to use before why would they now?” he questioned “Ok 1, I hope you realised that you just jinxed us big time with that little comment of yours.” trepp said while also sending a weak glare at his insane friend. “and 2 what makes this idea any more interesting than the previous ones?” he questioned. Deadman seem to brighten up both figuratively and quet literally, when trepp asked that one simple question. “You see my blue friend, the reason why this will be different is because the world we will be watching is home to our good friend Harmony!” cheered deadman completely missing trepp in the background banging his head on a random asteroid in frustration. After spending a good few seconds pounding the poor asteroid into rubble with his own head, trepp was able to calm down enough to turn to his fellow chaos god with the best calm look he could muster. Taking a deep breath trepp slowly calmed his nerves knowing he would need every ounce of patience he had for what was to come. “So you're telling me that you're planning on messing with the world of one of the oldest gods of order?” he questioned.” the same goddess that put you in those very chains in the first place?” some irritation was slowly building up. “HAHA! I know right!? Best payback prank ev-!” laughed the insane deity, but his enjoyment was cut short as he realised the his stoic friend was giving him the most chilling glare he’d ever seen. “AND YOU THINK IT’S GOOD IDEA TO SEND SOMETHING TO HER WORLD THAT COULD DRIVE IT TO OBLIVION!?” screamed the usually stoic god as he glared daggers at his irresponsible friend. “Do you have any idea what she would do to us if any of her subjects are harmed because of your impulses attitude!?” ranted trepp. “C-calm down trepp! You're just overreacting, nothing is going to go wrong!” stammered out Deadman. Realising a nervous chuckle as he notice his blue companion’s glare didn't leave his face. “Everything will turn out just fine! Right narrator?” he begged as he gave the disembodied voice a pleading look. Don’t get me involved in this…. “shit!” hissed the living inferno as he took a quick glance at his upset friend, breaking out in a cold sweat when he notice his usually stoic friend was still sending him a scathing glare. “Hehehehe…would it make you feel better if I said sorry” he laughed nervously. Trepp could only keep his glare up for a few seconds longer before he released a tired sigh and settled with giving his squirming friend an annoyed look. “Whatever… I’m just glad I nipped this in the bud before anything could happen.” groand the exhausted deity, but he was quick to notice that the nervous look was still planted on Deadman’s face. “What happened?” he questioned feeling that he would not like the answer. “Well…...I might of, possibly, more than likely…SentThePackagedAllready!!” blurted out the fiery being. Hoping his friend didn’t catch what he said, but unfortunately he did if the sporadic head twitching and the clenching of his hands were any indication.”hehehe~ oops?” he said sheepishly. “YOU DID WHAT!? WHERE DID YOU SEND IT!!” Trepp screamed as he quickly rushed towards his friend, planning to strangle him for this colossal mess up that could end badly for the both of them. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Meanwhile in Equestria, location Castle of Friendship.~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ “I’m telling you twilight, I really think you shouldn't be messing with something that somehow got into the castle” spoke a nervous purple and green baby dragon. His green eyes looking towards said object as his friend/mother figure was poking and prodding the strange objects. “Spike I told you all ready it’s just a tv, just like the one’s in the human world.” explained a lavender pony with large purple eyes and a straight prussian blue mane and tail with violet and rose streaks and to top off the look, she was sporting a horn and a set of wing, officially making her an alicorn one of the rarest species in the whole world. “I know what it is Twilight. I’m just not sure you should be messing with something that shouldn't even be in our world.” said the nervous drake as he kept a safe distance from the 70 inch plasma widescreen tv (WITH NETFLIX!) which was hanging on the wall of the ballroom. “And that's what I’m trying to figure out,” muttered twilight as she tried every type of scanning spell to make sure it wasn’t a trap, but every scan ended with it coming out clean.”but from what every spell is telling me is that it’s safe.” she exclaimed. “Well maybe you could take a look at this box now.” spike said as he pointed towards the mentioned box which was set in the corner of the room. “I was getting to that.” the young alicorn said as she makes her way to the lone box, keeping her guard up, ”hm? there's a note taped on it?” she questioned, using her magic to pull the note from the box. Dear twilight sparkle. You are no doubt wondering about the two items that I have left within your home. Firstly I would like to put any fears you might have about the objects being some sort of trap. I sent these items to you so you could glimpse into worlds. Held within this box a set of DVDs and a DVD player to go with the TV that was also provided for you. The DVDs contain all of the episodes of a show from another world that dedicated itself on answering the most important question ever asked… who would win in a fight! This show pits some of the greatest warriors against each other to see who would come out on top! but If this doesn't catch your interest and you think this would be a waste of your time, then you are free to put everything up where you found it and both the tv and the box and it’s contents will be gone from your castle within an hour, but if you are interested in the concept of seeing warriors from other worlds battling it out and LEARNING about other worlds and their coulters. Then please take a seat and enjoy the show! From: A friend. Both residents of the castle stared at the letter before giving each other a confused look. After a few more seconds of silence it was spike who spoke up. “So… what should we do?” questioned the young dragon as he waited for his parental figure to came up with an answer like she usually does when faced with the abnormal situations that always seem to find their way to their doorstep. Said lavender pony just stood there in deep thought until she looked towards the box and used her magic to remove it’s contents and gently lay them on the floor in front of the tv. “Spike could you do me a favor and please get the girls while I set everything up?” Asked Twilight as she started connecting the wires in the correct areas just like the human counterpart of her friend rainbowdash showed furring her second time in the human world. “So the others will be watching the show as well?” Spike asked, wondering if it was a good idea to involve more ponies in this strange situation. “ well if it’s not a trap like the letter says then i don’t see no reason to not let them in on a rare chance to see something from a whole new world.” replied the princess of friendship with a simple shrug. “Besides I’d rather have our friends here with us incase it is a trap.” she explained further. The young drake thought twilight’s words over a few more seconds before giving her a bright smile and running off to complete the task that he was given, leaving an amused Twilight who couldn't help but smile at her young charges enthusiasm. Shaking her head in amusement she decided to get back to her own task stopping only after she took a quick glance at the title of the DVDS. “DEATH BATTLE?”
Samus Aran VS. Boba Fett.(edited)“Are you sure about this about this Twi?” questioned a southern voice belonging to a young mare with an amber coat, green eyes and a blond mane and tail, wearing a brown stetson hat, and her cutie mark was of three red apples. This young mare is known by many as, Applejack or A.J. To her friend's, and just like her friend Twilight who represented the Element of Magic, she represents the Element of Honesty. “I have to agree with Applejack on this one darling, I don’t even think a show called, ‘Death Battle’, would even be all that entertaining.” commented a white unicorn, with blue eyes, a purple mane and tail, and a cutie mark that is an image of three diamonds. This young mare was called, Rarity, Ponyville's very own fashion-designer and the one who represents the Element of Generosity. “Are you two serious? This sounds awesome!” argued a brash voice belonging to a young blue coat pegasus, with magenta eyes, along with a rainbow colored mane and tail, and was also sporting a rainbow-colored lightning bolt as her cutie mark. This tomboyish mare is known as, Rainbow Dash, self proclaimed fastest flyer all of equestria, and the one who represents the Element of Loyalty. “Dashie’s right girls! This is going to be super dooper Fun! Fun! Fun!” cheered a hyperactive pink pony, with electric blue eyes, and a cerise mane and tail. Her cutie mark consists of one yellow balloon along with two blue ones. This ball of energy is, Pinkie Pie, she’s Ponyville's no.1 Party Planner Extraordinaire, and represents the Element of Laughter. “A’h know you two would get excited over somethin’ like this, but aren't ya just a little bit too eager to watch something about battles to the death?” the southern mare questioned with a raised brow. “Oh please, A.J. it’s just a show! It’s not like anypony is really getting hurt.” countered the the blue mare, ”Am I right, Fluttershy?” she questioned a yellow coated pegasus, with cerulean eyes, pink mane and tail, and a cutie mark of three butterflies which represented her gentle nature. Said the mare who hid behind her long mane as she nervously nodded her head. This young mare was named, Fluttershy. A kind and gentle pony who took care of any animal no matter how big or small it was. Because of her gentle soul, she is the one who represents the Element of Kindness. “Now girls, I had Spike to bring you here so we could have a good time seeing something that's never been seen in our world before.” Twilight cutted in before her two strong headed friends’ argument could get out of hand. “Fine/Sure thing Twi.” the two muttered out as they and the others sat in some chairs that Twilight had placed while she was setting everything up. “Ok everypony! Are you all ready to see a show from out of this world!?” cheered the princess to her fellow ponies and one young dragon. “YEAAAH!” cheered the rest of the group as Twilight hit play on the remote that came with the T.V. It was silent for a second before some music started to blast from the speakers and the show logo appeared on screen and two voices, probably the hosts of the show, started speaking. (*Cues: Invader - Jim Johnston*) Wiz: The bounty hunter. Galactic pirates of living beings. Boomstick: They blow shit up for cash. “Whoo!” Rainbow dash cheered. “blowing stuff up and getting paid too!? Sign me up!” But while she was fantasizing about being an awesome bounty hunter, she was completely missing the amused smiles that her friends are sending her. Wiz: A prime example is Boba Fett, the most feared bounty hunter in the galaxy. Boomstick: But don't forget Samus Aran. She's so badass, whole planets explode when she's done with them. BOOM! Wiz: I'm Wizard. Boomstick: And I'm Boomstick. Wiz: And it's our job to analyze the weapons, armor, and skills of these two beastly killers and answer the most important question of all: Which of these two warriors would win... a Death Battle? This was already starting to catch most of the group's attention, but for ponies like Applejack and Rarity, they would have to wait and see if this show would be worth the time. Boba Fett (*Cues: Star Wars Episode IV - The Death Star/The Stormtroopers*) Wiz: Boba Fett is well known for his cunning, ruthlessness, and brute force. But his killer instinct relies on his diverse arsenal of death. The ponies and one dragon had a chill going down in their backs once a picture of the first fighter shows up on screen accompanied by some really chilling music. “S-scary…” squeaked out a frighten Fluttershy as she tried hiding behind her mane, but a comforting hoof was placed on her shoulder by, Rainbow Dash, who gave her a confident smile which helped boost Fluttershy’s confidence to keep watching. Mandalorian Body Armor Nearly Indestructible (They wondered what it could be made of or if it could stop a blast of magic someone like Tirek,) Micro Energy Field (That caught Twilight's attention.) Penetrating Radar Protection from Fire, Poison, Acid, Cold (Twilight was really tempted to find this amazing metal just so she could research it.) Retractable Drinking Straw (This sets Pinkie on a giggling fit.) Boomstick: Plus, he wears the most badass space suit ever. “I must say, while I don’t quite agree with his occupation, I have to admit he looks quite dashing in that armor.” complemented Rarity as she fantasized about being rescued by a brave stallion and being carried towards the sunset. But unannounced to her, Spike was envisioning the same thing but with him in the armor and getting a kiss from Rarity. Wiz: That's no ordinary spacesuit, Boomstick; that's Fett's Mandalorian Armor, forged of nearly indestructible Duraplast, containing a micro-energy field for dispersing impacts. Boomstick: This guy can have a freaking bomb blow up in his face and still walk away. “Not even Princess Celestia can handle an explosion that close to her face without it causing some major damage.” muttered out Twilight as she envisioned a being that could take more damage then one of the strongest ponies in the world. Wrist Gauntlets Flame Projector Fiber Cord Whip Wrist Laser Concussion Missiles Stun Missiles Wiz: His gauntlets house a flamethrower with a reach of 5 meters, a fiber cord whip, and numerous concussion and stun missiles. His weapon of choice is his EE-3 Carbine Rifle, an extremely accurate and powerful weapon which Fett often cradles like a child. EE-3 Carbine Blaster Fires in Short Burst Scope-Outfitted Shoulder Sling Rock-a-Bye Rifle... (That confuses everyone, even Pinkie Pie.) Boomstick: Yeah... I do that with my guns, too... Wiz: That's not weird at all, Boomstick. Fill us in on Fett's heavy weaponry. “I don’t think our host are all up there if you know what I mean?” snarked the young fire breather as he twirled a clawed finger next to his head, electing a few giggles from his friends. Boomstick: Well, everybody and their grandmother knows that Fett can zoom around on his badass jetpack, but that jetpack also has a single anti-vehicle homing rocket, and believe me, you don't want to see this thing heading your way. "AWWWW YEAH! Flying for the win!" cheered Rainbow Dash. Mitrinomon Z-6 Jetpack Hands-Free Up to 1 Minute in Flight (that was really disappointing to rainbow dash.) Max Speed: 145 kph Magnetic Grappling Hook Anti-Vehicle Homing Rocket While the speed and range of it’s flight was disappointing especially to a certain blue mare. Everyone could agree, it still had it’s uses and could even help ponies who couldn't fly or do things that they would need a pegasus's help to do. “Though it would be totally awesome to have something on my back to shoot at any nasty monster that attacked Ponyville!” the fastest flyer in Ponyville said while the others agreed it would be helpful dealing with monsters that seem to always show up when they let their guard down. Wiz: That's right, Boomstick. In short, Fett is a human Swiss Army Knife. He's killed hundreds of criminals, politicians, and Jedi. He's even held his own against Darth Vader... twice. Boomstick: Holy shit, that is hardcore! The group had to admit, those kind of feats were impressive especially when an image of who, Darth Vader was. This was somepony that could even out scare ponies like, Nightmare Moon and even Sombra. “And this Fett guy fought this monster TWICE!?” exclaimed Applejack, wondering why somepony would be willing to fight something that could make Nightmare Moon look like a tamed kitten in comparison. Wiz: He became leader of the Mandalorian Mercenaries after the Galactic Civil War, and battled Mace Windu to a draw when he was 12 years old. “WHEN HE WAS 12!?” yelled the girls surprised that someone so young could keep up with a more experienced fighter. “So cool!” cheered Spike with stars in his eye’s, wondering if he could pull off something like that while he was still young. Boomstick: Sam Jackson's got nothing on him. Wiz: But, with all his awesomeness, every so often Fett will totally blow it. He's fallen into the Sarlacc three times. Three! And the Sarlacc's not exactly running around, looking for snacks. Boomstick: Three times? How do you even do that once? It's a giant hole in the ground with teeth, and he's got a jetpack! “Yeah he can fly! How could he fall in that stupid hole in the first place!?” ranted Dash miffed that someone she thought was cool could do something so lame. “I want to know how he fell in there two more times?” questioned Fluttershy, wondering why he didn't learn his lesson the first time. Wiz: Still, even with his ridiculous flaws, Boba Fett is a whole new meaning of deadly. Darth Vader: No disintegration. Boba Fett: As you wish. After the analysis for Boba Fett was over, the girls and dragon talked about the fearsome bounty hunter and agreed that even with his faults, he was still a fearsome foe and wondered how this, Samus Aran, would stack up. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Samus Aran (*Cues: Lower Norfair - Super Metroid*) Wiz: Samus Aran was infused with bird-like Chozo DNA at a young age, increasing her strength, speed, and athletic ability far beyond those of a normal human being. Boomstick: How do they do that?! I want me some bird DNA! “I don’t think it works that way.” lectured Twilight. “Well, they are from space. Maybe they have birds that can take down giant aliens?” reasoned Spike which caused the girls to give it a thought and also had Fluttershy wondering if those kind of birds would be her friends. Wiz: She wears the Power Suit, typically in Varia form, shielding her entire body without restricting any movement or flexibility. "it's amazing that something that looks so heavy could allow her to moves with such grace and speed." admired rarity. Power Suit Shields Entire Body Environmental Protection Easy to Upgrade No restriction of Movement or Flexibility (That impressed them that such a bulky suit could allow that much movement.) Boomstick: Too bad it makes her look like a dude… That caused a few like Rainbow Dash, Pinkie Pie and Spike to snicker at Boomsticks disappointed tone. While the others just rolled their eyes at the saddened man. Wiz: Her primary weapon, the Arm Cannon, has acquired numerous awesome upgrades over the years. Though, the basic Power Beam is a pea shooter with a pathetic range. "Well that's disappointing," muttered an unimpressed Twilight. Boomstick: But when it's fully charged, it'll blow your face off. BAM! Shoop Da Whoop! “Heheheheh! Boomy is so silly.” giggled Pinkie, finding the vocal of the two crazy narrators more entertaining. Wiz: The Arm Cannon can also use an Ice Beam, a Grapple Beam, and a plethora of Seeking and Super Missiles. Samus controls the skies with a powerful and speedy Screw Attack, and if there's trouble on the battlefield, she can curl up into Morph Ball mode and slip away unnoticed. “How does she fly like that!?” yelled both Rainbow Dash and Twilight., both dumbfounded on how someone could fly in such a ridiculous way. Arm Cannon Easy to Upgrade Power Beam Charge Beam Ice Beam Grapple Beam Missiles Mitrinomon Z-6 Jetpack (Screw Attack) Powerful electric charge Temporary invincibility Extremely Fast Namesake of an Awesome Website! Morph Ball Alt-Form 1 Meter Diameter Can Release Bombs Jumping Ability Also Called "Maru Mari" Can Access Small or Hard to Reach Places Boomstick: What the f...?! How does she do that? Wiz; Bird DNA, Boomstick. Bird DNA. The small group had to marvel at the large array of weapons in abilities that were listed on screen, showing just how skilled and versatile Samus really was. Boomstick: Samus also has a freakin huge supply of Power Bombs, which will destroy anything on the screen in seconds. Nothing survives! “Wowzers! Those are some big fireworks!” Yelled Pinkie Pie. wondering if those power bombs could be used to make the greatest surprise party ever! A cold chill ran down everyone else's back and they all had the sudden urge to keep Pinkie Pie away from any explosives. Power Bombs Huge Blast Radius Deals Massive Damage Crystal Flash Healing Ability Deployed Only in Morph Ball Mode Wiz: She is known to be the bounty hunter capable of taking on impossible missions, fighting massive beasts, and even wiping out an entire species. However, she often makes mistakes. Somehow, she always seems to lose all her power ups and upgrades at the beginning of every mission. Boomstick: Man, someone get this chick a purse. “She should stop by my place sometime. I’m sure I could find her the right purse to go with her suit of armor.” bragged Rarity, causing her friends to laugh and agreeing that, ‘If anyone could do it, it would be Rarity’. Samus: Time to go. Wiz: Alright, the combatants are set. Let's end this debate once and for all. Boomstick: But first, we gotta pay off my double barreled, bazooka shotgun, thanks to netflix. intermission<<<<<<<<<< As the trailer played out everyone was discussing about the fighters, they all agreed that both bounty hunters where skilled in their own ways. On team Boba Fett was Rainbow dash, Pinkie Pie, Rarity, and Spike. Boba was so cool and they thought with his experience and track record would get him the win. And on team Samus was Twilight, AppleJack, and Fluttershy. To them not only was she physically stronger, but also had a greater arsenal to work with. After everyone got settled down to continued watching, Twilight quickly hit play to continue the show. Boomstick: Well it’s time for a death battle!!! Death Battle (*Cues: Metroid: Zero Mission - Title Theme Remix*) Samus is shown flying through space in her spaceship. However, Boba Fett's ship, the Slave I, shoots at her ship, throwing out of orbit which is landing on Earth, where it crash lands somewhere in the middle of a futuristic city. Samus gets out of her ship and Fett hovers down to the where Samus landed. FIGHT! (*Cues: Star Wars Episode V - Attacking a Star Destroyer*) Samus shoots her Power Beams, that fade out almost instantly, not even reaching her opponent. (Rainbow couldn't help but laugh at this.) Fett counters with a few shots from his blaster, but Samus jumps in the air, firing a missile at Fett, which hits. When she lands, Fett hits her with his flamethrower. When Samus jumps back and shoots another missile, Fett flies up using his jet pack. However, Samus goes after him using her Screw Attack and eventually hits him, which forces him to the ground. “Git ’im Samus! Show that no good varmint what for!” cheered Applejack, seeing the the female bounty hunter take down the mandalorian warrior. “Grrrr come on Fett! You can do this!” yelled a frustrated Rainbow Dash while her fellow teammates cheered on their favorite hunter. (*Cues: Star Wars Episode IV - Imperial Attack*) When Samus lands, Fett shoots missiles at her. He then fires his anti-vehicle homing missile, which Samus escapes by going into Morph Ball mode and escaping through a doorway. (*Cues: Unknown Theme*) Fett cautiously creeps toward the doorway as Samus sneaks behind him in Morph Ball mode and plants a Power Bomb near his feet. (*Cues: Unknown Theme*) “Uh-oh…” muttered team Boba Fett as they realised what was coming next. The bomb explodes and it takes off a large chunk of Fett's health. His suit having withstood the blast, Fett sees Samus and fires a missile at her. Samus dodges by stepping to the side and then freezes Fett using her Ice Beam. She then moves toward the frozen bounty hunter and begins charging her arm cannon. With the charge at its apex and Boba Fett's body slightly moving as he tries to break free of the ice, Samus positions her arm cannon toward his head. Samus: You're mine. With the charge at its maximum before Boba Fett could escape, Samus fires her Charge Beam point-blank, knocking his head clean from his body. K.O.! His head flies back downward, clanking on the ground leaving everyone wide eyed at the gruesome display. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ “NOOOOOO!!” wailed a heartbroken Rainbow Dash as the rest of team Boba Fett looked down in sadness as their favorite Fighter was put down. Results (*Cues: Super Metroid - Main Theme (Orchestrated)* ) Boomstick: Holy shit! Did you see that, Wiz? That was insane! Wiz: Fett battled like a champ, but in the end, Samus' superior technology and athletic skill trumped him... hard. While her basic Power Beam failed miserably, Samus put her Chozo DNA to work by jumping and dodging around Fett's offenses. Boba Fett, who relies more on cunning and brute force, simply didn't have the means necessary to catch Samus. “You can only get so far with just brute force alone.” explained Twilight. The rest agreeing with her logic even if a few wanted Fett to win. Boomstick: He was shooting all over the place, but that space chick was just too quick for him. He even tried to use his homing rocket, but anybody who's blown up a lot of shit knows anti-vehicle rockets don't work too well with people. Wiz: Exactly. Samus is about four times smaller than the average vehicle, so there's only about a one in four chance for a direct hit from Fett's rocket. Not to mention she kept moving, preventing Fett from getting a solid lock on her. Everyone could agree that shooting someone with a weapon that was made to take out things much larger and slower than someone who was faster and more acrobatic was not a smart choice, especially when that person could roll up into a ball even smaller then them and sneak around in hard to reach places. Boomstick: After that screw up, Samus managed to sneak around Fett and left a little surprise at his feet. Wiz: Fett's micro-energy field managed to minimize the damage he took from the power bomb, but by that point, it was all over. Samus froze Fett with her Ice Beam and finished him off with a Charge Beam to the face. Boomstick: She sure stopped him cold. That caused everyone to groan at Boomsticks lame pun except a giggling Pinkie Pie who was rolling on the ground laughing at what she considered a, super duper awesome joke. Wiz: That's right Boomstick. The Winner is Samus Aran. End Boomstick: Next time on DEATH BATTLE! There was a flurry of punches covered in purple flames and then an odd burning symbol appeared on screen, followed by a bone chilling voice. ???: your souls is mine! END. “Awwww man! I was so sure someone as cool as Fett would win!” groaned out a disheartened Rainbow dash as Fluttershy laid her hoof down on her friend's shoulder trying to cheer her up. “I know you're bummed out Dashie, but at least he gave it his all and it was still a fun fight.” said a grinning Pinkie pie which caused the rainbow speedster to give a small smile and nod to the pink party pony. “Well, I just hope everyone had a fun time watching this show together.” chirped a happy Twilight, and glad she was able to not only see creatures from another world, but their vast array of technology as well. “A’h have to admit Twi, that wasn’t half bad! Heck, I could watch another episode right now.” proclaimed Applejack, glad that she gave this show a chance and Rarity seemed to agree with her southern friend. “While I’m sad Mr. Fett died, it’s like Rainbow Dash said, ‘it’s just a show’, and I think I could watch some more too.” said Fluttershy with a confident look but quickly switched to a more bashful expression. “W-well, I mean... as long as everyone watches with me… if you don’t mind that is.” stuttered the blushing pegasus. “Well, I’m glad everyone enjoyed the show and we can watch another episode in a little bit. But first, I think we should stretch our legs for a bit and maybe get something to eat for the next battle, I also want to send a letter to the princess about this show, and how it’s from another world.” Twilight suggested as she and Spike made there way to the library to grab a quill and ink. The rest of the group agreed and made their way to the kitchen to make themselves something to eat. ####( Ending scene) “Well that sure was a fun watch if A’h do say so myself” praised AppleJack as she and the rest of the group made their way to the kitchen to grab a few snacks for the next episode while Twilight and Spike wrote a letter to Princess Celestia. “Totally agree with you there A.J! But just you wait, the next person I choose will definitely win!” bragged the rainbow maned mare as she puffed out her chest in pride, knowing the next person she rooted for would definitely win. "And I thought it was super funny how Sammy was able to fly like that!" giggled Pinkie Pie, as she bounced along with her friends, "I wonder if I could fly like that too if I tried hard enough?" she questioned while stopping to ponder her own question. "Well, I don't know about that darling, but I must say that I'm feeling quite peckish, wouldn't mind a small snack." said Rarity, to which everyone agreed with and the group started to pick up the pace to get to the kitchen faster. None of them noticing Pinkie Pie wasn't following them. "I hope twilight has something good to eat, right Pinkie Pie?" asked Rainbow Dash, as she made her way to the kitchen with the rest of the group. But, she stop and raised a brow, as soon as she realised that her pink friend didn't reply to her question. "Pinkie Pie?" she questioned as she turned around to see what was wrong, but was soon stunned silent as she along with the rest of her friend's saw the most bizarre sight they've seen yet. "What in tarnation!?" muttered the southern mare, as she and the rest of the group saw Pinkie Pie roll up into a pink ball with only her tail sticking out, and much to the amazement to her friends began to FLY! "Wheeee!!! I did it guys!" cheered the hyper pink pony as she was perfectly imitating Samus's Screw Attack and started making her way down towards the kitchen. “Hurry up girls! I'll meet you there!” she proclaimed, while continuing her way down the hall, luckily not bumping, or knocking anything over. The the rest of the group could only stare, dumbfounded as their party planing friend continued defying all laws of physics, and kept making her way to the kitchen. "...... Let's not tell Twilight about this." said Fluttershy wide-eyed, not wanting her lavender friend to mentally break down like she did last time she tried to figure out how Pinkie Pie is capable of her strange feats. The rest of her friends nodding in agreement as they continued their trek down to the kitchen, applying the most important life lesson they ever learned. If it’s Pinkie Pie, don't question it. Chapter END.
Starscream VS Rainbow Dash.The four stood there as three of their friends just walked out the door after they saw who was on the next episode. “Well should we watch the next episode?” Spike asked, scratching his head in confusion. “Of course we’re gonna watch it. We can’t just not watch something as awesome as this,” Rainbow said, doing a little dance. She really wanted to see how she fares in the fight. “It’s a shame that it’s just gonna be us,” Twilight said, walking over to the couch. Taking a seat, Twilight used her magic to levitate the remote towards her as a loud knocking came from her door. She raised an eyebrow while focusing her magic to her door causing it to open. Outside the door where two figures that just stood there, looking inside. The first one was a turquoise colored pegasus mare with a slicked back golden mane. The other one was the stranger of the two as it was a brown griffon with white and purple tipped feathers. They were Lightning Dust and Gilda respectively, Rainbow Dash’s friends. “Uh, is Rainbow Dash here? We were at her house, but she wasn’t there,” Lightning said, looking around the room a bit. She had her front hooves crossed and was fidgeting a bit. “Hey, Gilda, Lightning. What’s up?” Rainbow asked, flying over towards them. “Not much. Kinda bored and figured we could just bother you for a bit,” Gilda said while smirking slightly. She held her clenched claw up as Rainbow bumped it with her hoof. “I hear you. And you Lightning?” Rainbow asked, wondering why her ex-partner was here. “The thing is, I wanted to know if we could start over. I know we didn’t leave on the best of terms but-” Lightning tried to say but was stopped as Rainbow held up a hoof. “It’s water under the bridge Lightning. So how about you two come inside. We were just about to do something, want to watch?” Rainbow , flying back towards the couch. “Watch?” the two asked at the same time. They at each other in confusion but shrugged and followed Rainbow inside. Once inside the room, they sat down on the couch and saw the flat screen TV in front of them. “What’s that?” Lightning asked, staring at the strange object. “Don’t worry about it. We use it to watch the show,” Rainbow said, grabbing a few cupcakes for herself. “Show?” Gilda asked confused. “Just watch. Turn it on Twilight,” Rainbow said as her friend rolled her eyes and pressed play on the remote. Interlude (*Cues: Invader - Jim Johnston*) Unlike the others who get surprised at the intro music, Gilda and Lightning Dust were nodding their heads to the intense beat. Wiz: Television has been used to market toys to boys and girls for generations, ranging from G.I. Joe and Barbie to Transformers and My Little Pony. “So that’s what our counterparts are in that world, toys and cartoons.” Twilight said Boomstick: Are we really doing this? “This guy doesn't really seem to be getting into it,” Lightning Dust commented. “Meh his problem not our’s,” said Gilda with a shrug. Wiz/Rainbow Dash: Yes. Yes we are. Boomstick: Alright, well, Starscream from the first generation Decepticons... “A guy with that kind of name must be an awesome warrior,” Lightning dust said. Twilight and Gilda nodding their heads in agreement. “Well of course I would be fighting someone who also would just as awesome!” bragged Rainbow Dash. not noticing Pinkie Pie snickering in the background. “Ya if this was Armada Starscream, then i would totally agree,” Pinkie Pie said to herself before giving the writer and the readers a wink. “Right Mr Author?” she asked. Damn straight. Wiz: ...And Rainbow Dash of the G4 Pegasus Ponies. “AKA the winner of this fight,” said speedster said as her friends gave her amused looks. Boomstick: He's Wiz and I'm Boomstick. Wiz: And it's our job to analyze their weapons, armor, and skills to find out who would win a Death Battle. Starscream (*Cues: Attack On the Shuttle - Lightning Their Darkest Hour*) Wiz: Starscream is the air commander of the Decepticon Battle fleet. He constantly seeks power, and often attempts to usurp Megatron's leadership of the Decepticons, with little success. Background Height: Approx. 20' Decepticon seeker Air commander Graduate of the Cybertron War Academy Nicknamed 'Silver Snake' “So a backstabber,” commented Twilight before she sent a Look towards Rainbow Dash. “Your other self will have to stay on guard when fighting him.” Said mare nodded as she was paying close attention on the screen. Boomstick: He has two forms- giant robot and jet. “Aren't jets those flying metal things that the human world Rainbow Dash told us about?” asked Spike, getting a nod from Twilight. “Yes and while she didn’t tell us much, she did say they fly extremely fast and are arm to the teeth.” said the Princess of Magic. Getting a slightly nervous look from Rainbow Dash. Wiz: His robot form is primarily meant for ground travel. Though it can fly short distances. Robot-Mode Humanoid Can fly Cluster bombs Missiles Laser guns Null Ray “So he’ll be slower in that form.” analysed Twilight. “I think that’s when you should go on the offences,” suggested Gilda. “Ya your other self can win if she takes him out before he turns into his jet mode,” added Lightning Dust. earning a grateful smile from the mare, happy that at least some of her friends still had hope that she could when. Boomstick: This form's weaponry consists of cluster bomb, missiles, machine guns, and his trademark Null Ray, a laser that shuts down anything that uses electricity. “(gulp) so twi… how bad are those weapons?” questioned Rainbow Dash. “Bad.” the alicorn simply said as she remembered reading some books the sunset lent on human weaponry and not being able to sleep for a week after hearing about the atom bomb, and what it can do. Wiz: He can transform into an F-15 Eagle; a twin engined, all weather fighter jet with top speeds reaching mach 2.8, nearly three times the speed of sound. “That is fast but I’m faster and this guy is nowhere Sonic’s speed.” said Rainbow Dash. “Who’s Sonic?” asked Gilda, Lightning Dust wondering as well. “Oh it’s some guy Rainbow Dash li-” Spike was about to say before Rainbow Dash covered his mouth with her hoof. “It’s no one! Just forget you heard anything!” Panicked the Rainbow maned Mare, giving her two friends a nervous smile. “O...kay?” said a confused Lightning dust. Boomstick: In jet form, he can fire three different types of homing missiles, from short-ranged Sidewinders to long ranged Slammers. And if those don't do the trick, he's equipped with a M61A1 Vulcan Gatling Gun, that fires twenty millimeter ammo at six-thousand rounds per minute. Fun fact: it also works great for hunting! “A pretty big assortment of weapons. But with your speed and size he shouldn't be able to hit you,” stated Twilight in full confidence of her friends skill. “Ya good thing you’ve always been a shrimp huh?” teased Gilda as she ruffled Dash’s mane, earning her a cute pout from said mare. “Teehee!” giggled Pinkie Pie happy to see her friend in a better mood. alternate mode F-15 Eagle Fighter Jet Top Speed: 2,100 MPH RIM homing missiles 7F/M Sparrows 120 AMRAAM Slammers 9L/M Sidewinders M61A1 Vulcan Gatling Gun Wiz: Starscream is a coward, and uses cheap tactics, often shooting his opponents in the back. However, his deadliest weapon is arguably his silver tongue. While he is not the strongest Decepticon, he is a cleaver and deceiving speaker, who can worm his way into favorable positions. Despite this he is a terrible strategist. Most of his plans instantly go wrong. Attributes A clever speaker Transparent Strategist Arrogant & Stubborn Cowardly Uses cheap tactics “So he’s only good at talking out his flank?” deadpanned Lightning Dust. “Doubt he can even use half the weapons he has,” snarked Gilda. “Just be happy this isn’t Armada Starscream, that guy was a great fighter and could turn his wings into laser swords!” said Pinkie Pie mutch to the confusion of everyone else. Boomstick: Like when he took over the Decepticons because Megatron had a sore throat: Everyone face hoofed at this. Megatron: *incomprehensible speech* Autobots! “Awww~ poor Megy sounds so sick! I bet a bowl of soup could help,” said Pinkie Pie, pulling out a bowl of steaming soup out of nowhere. Starscream: Too bad! He's blown his vocal components. I guess that makes me the new leader! “Did he really try to a move like that.” Twilight said in a flat tone. “Reminds me of some of those Nobles that thought they could replace Celestia.” deadpanned Spike. Boomstick/Pinkie Pie: It was short lived. Wiz: And yet his persistence paid off, and he was eventually crowned leader of the Decepticon Faction. “What!” yelled most of the group in disbelief. “Wait for it.” said a bored Pinkie Pie. Boomstick: Again, short lived. “There we go!” grinned Pinkie Pie. Wiz: Starscream was king for a whopping twenty seconds, a personal record. However, after his death, Starscream discovered his spark, or life-force, was, somehow, indestructible. “So in other words… he lucked out?” asked Lightning Dust “Seems that way,” answered Twilight. Boomstick: And a good thing too, because since then, he's been dying nearly every episode. “Ouch,” mumbled Spike. Starting to feel bad for the guy. Spark Indestructible Can move on its own Floats Can possess & control other machines Wiz: His ghostly spark can possess machinery. He has taken over several other Transformers, robots, and even a cybernetic schoolgirl while she was using the bathroom. Boomstick/everyone: What?! Wiz: Unfortunately, his poor knowledge of human society led him to forget to pull up the girl's underwear, making him the laughing stock of the school. The group was split between laughing and feeling bad for the school girl. Boomstick: Props to you, Japan. I didn't see that coming. Megatron: You're an idiot, Starscream! “Agreed!” everyone said. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ While everyone agreed starscream was good for a laugh, they agreed he wouldn’t win against that world’s Rainbow Dash. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Rainbow Dash (*Cues: MLP: FIM - Sonic Rainboom (Just An Old Mare's Tale)*) Wiz: Rainbow Dash is a Pegasus Pony from Equestria, the magical land of ponies. “And here comes the champ! Ready to beat down the competition!” said Spike in a tv host voice, and rainbow Dash was bowing as if she was in front of a huge crowed, getting quite a few laughs Boomstick: *Sighs* “Ha! Keep sighing pal. It ain't gonna stop the show from saying how awesome i am,” boasted the Blue mare. Wiz: After dropping out of Flight School, Rainbow found a job in Ponyville as Weather Manager. She is a strong, agile flyer with great durability and resilience. She can smash through trees and solid rock and get right back up. She is also training to join the Wonderbolts, a superb team of flyers who are kind of like the Blue Angels. “Which I’m already in the reserves,” she boasted even more. “Uh-oh, i think i see her head getting bigger,” teased Spike, getting a round of laughter from the group even Rainbow Dash found it funny even if it was directed at her. Boomstick: ...Except, they're ponies. Wiz: She is also a black belt in karate. “Oh ya i forgot you knew martial arts,” said Twilight. “She sure does and you're looking at the griffin who taught her,” bragged Gilda, surprising Spike, Twilight, and even Pinkie Pie. Boomstick: How does a pony learn karate, let alone master it? “I’m just awesome like that.” bragged Rainbow dash. Background Height: Approx. 4' Flight School dropout Weather Manager Winner of 'Best Young Flyer's Competition Unnatural durability Black belt in Karate Apple Bloom kicks a punching bag, only for her to shake a few seconds and fall to the ground. (*Cues: MLP: FIM - Iron Pony*) Wiz: As a Pegasus pony, Rainbow can control weather. She can use the clouds in the sky to manipulate lighting strikes and precipitation. Also, she can create and control giant tornadoes. “Yep her weather control is pretty imazing… when she’s not napping on the job,” snarked Twilight. “Oh come on you caught sleeping on the job one time,” complained Rainbow Dash only to get a flat stare and a raised eyebrow from the lavender princess. “Heheh ok maybe a few… 12 times heh.” grinned Rainbow sheepishly. Boomstick: She's also got some other moves, like the Buccaneer Blaze, which is apparently so amazing it can't be shown on screen. And, somehow, it creates a huge explosion. “And what causes those explosions is a secret,” Rainbow Dash teased. Movelist Super Speed Struct Fantastic Filly Flash Cloud barrel weave Cloud spinning Rainblow Dry Buccaneer Blaze Wiz: Rainbow often brags that she is the fastest in the world. And you know what? She's right. “Awwwwww ya!” cheered Rainbow Dash. Wiz: By calculations according to this guy. (image of brony holding a bunch of MLP merchandise) everyone:... Rainbow Dash can fly up to five times the speed of sound with ease. This is apparent through the mach cone that often forms around Rainbow, which indicates that she has broken the sound barrier. And the angle of which proves she can reach up to Mach 5 speeds. “Ya though even have a hard time controlling my movement at those speeds,” admitted a humble Rainbow Dash. Boomstick: This is a pony, a baby horse girl toy. Why is it so awesome? “Because this baby horse is a bad flank!” Rainbow Dash bragged for everyone. Getting her friends to smile and laugh. Wiz: And upon reaching Mach 5, she entered hyper sonic speeds to create the Sonic Rainboom. With this, her speed doubles instantaneously to Mach 10. And somehow the resulting sonic boom completely shatters the visible light spectrum. “And is what help me and the rest our friends gain our cutie marks,” Twilight said. Giving Rainbow Dash a grateful smile. “Heheh no problem Twilight,” Rainbow said Bashfully. "It’s rare to see her humble like that," Gilda whispered to Spike. “Tell me about,” he agreed. Boomstick: Not to mention the sonic boom itself is apparently strong enough to split solid rock and shake entire mountains. Sonic Rainboom Hypersonic Speed of Mach 10 Top Speed: 7,600 mph Creates a Rainbow Powerful Shockwave Can pull 90 degree turns Wiz: Rainbow is brash, athletic, and extremely competitive. But while she's steadfast and loyal, she sometimes cheats to get her way. Attributes Brash & Arrogant Extremely competitive Brave & Loyal Athletic on both ground & air Top Speed: 3,800 MPH “Ya… not my proudest moments,” admitted Rainbow Dash, voice filled to the brim with guilt. But a hug from both Twilight and Pinkie was able to cheer her up. Boomstick: Well... let's make it fight a giant robot. Rainbow Dash: Yeeeeaaaaahh! “Go me!” the blue mare cheered. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ There was no need to choose teams everyone was going to cheer on Rainbow Dash. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Wiz: Alright, the combatants are set, let's end this debate once and for all Boomstick: Time for a Death Battle! Death Battle The F-15 Eagle Jet Fire flies in to reveal itself to be bumbling Starscream coming in for a land in his humanoid robot form. Starscream: Who dares challenge the mighty Starscream? “Oh you’ll see~,” the group sang. (*Cues: MLP:FIM - Rarity's Fashion Show*) Out of the blinding sun, a Pegasus pony named Rainbow Dash flies down in a landing seeing Starscream. Rainbow Dash: Hi there. FIGHT! Starscream: *mockingly laughs* A pony? I'll crush you in an instant. Prepare to be annihilated. That got a glare from the rainbow themed Pegasus as her friends tried to come her down. Rainbow Dash: You talk a lot. Rainbow flies around Starscream in many different directions, bucks him in the heel with no effect on him, Starscream backhands Rainbow out of anger. Her friends winced as they saw that worlds version of her getting struck by a metal arm. Starscream: That. Is. it. I am going to kill you! Rainbow Dash: Tag, you're it! “Ha! Tag, that brings back memories!” laughed Gilda remembering the times she and Rainbow Dash use to play that as kids. Starscream shouts in anger as he turns back into the F-15 Eagle Jet Fire and chases Rainbow Dash in the sky. He proceeds to fire his Gatling gun, which Rainbow Dash easily evades. He then fires missiles, which also fail to hit their mark. In Starscream's POV, we see him preparing to lock onto Rainbow Dash. That got everyone worried. Starscream: Alright. Don't move. “Please move,” whispered Lightning Dust. Just as Starscream successfully locks on, Rainbow Dash flies off, immediately undoing it, causing his monitor to say "TARGET LOSS". Starscream: Blast it! Everyone breathed a sigh of relief. “Thank Harmony,” breathed Twilight. After he says this, Rainbow Dash appears face-to-face with him, making multiple funny faces at him. “Bwahahahaha!” laughed the blue mare along with the rest of her friends. Starscream: Hey! What are you doing? Stop that! This whole time, Rainbow Dash was standing on Starscream, who didn't even notice. “How is he not noticing a pegasus sitting on him?” questioned a confused Spike. “No idea…” gilda sad just as confused. Rainbow Dash: You're not very good at this game, are you? She leaps off of him, which Starscream clearly flees and then he proceeds to follow Rainbow Dash upward into the clouds . "hey isn't that derpy?" asked Spike as he saw the two fighters fly past the yellow mane pegasus. (*Cues: Spectrum*) Starscream then transforms back into his robot form and hovers. Starscream: Where are you? Show yourself! Rainbow Dash quickly flies in with a rain cloud and places it over Starscream. Starscream: Hey! “Oh this is going to be good,” both Lightning Dust and Rainbow Dash said as they both new what DB Dash was planing on doing. Rainbow Dash repeatedly kicks the rain cloud, causing Starscream to be hit repeatedly with lightning, eventually causing him to fall to the ground. Rainbow Dash walks on the ground up to her downed opponent, but she is suddenly struck by the Null Ray, knocking her back and momentarily dazing her. Starscream laughs, but then Rainbow Dash recovers. “Oh cheap shot huh?” growled Rainbow Dash in annoyance. “Did that moron just use a weapon that only harms machens?”Gilda deadpanned. Rainbow Dash: Alright! It... is... on! Rainbow Dash flies around Starscream multiple times, eventually creating a tornado, which he is trapped in. He attempts to escape by turning back into his jet form, only for one of his wings to break off, causing him to fall to the ground once again. Rainbow Dash lands and prepares to charge at him. Starscream: Wait! Wait! I'm sorry! Please don't hurt me! Please! “What?” everyone asked in disbelief. Hearing this, Rainbow Dash slows and eventually stops in her tracks. “What are you thinking other me!?” yelled a frustrated Rainbow Dash. “FINNISH HIM!!!” screamed Pinkie in a deep voice while wearing a skull like helmet. “What the heck is that thing?” asked Spike as he stared at the weird headwear. “Meh, just a spoiler for season 2.” replaid Pinkie Pie as she tossed the helmet to the side Starscream: I'll... I'll join the herd. I'll be a good Decepticon from now on. “Maybe he means it.” hoped Spike. As he is saying this, Starscream is preparing to lock onto the idle Rainbow Dash. “Or not,” Spike said. Starscream: Please... just let me go. “Oh that dirty little…” Gilda trailed off. Rainbow Dash: Well... I don't know. I mean... I know should love and tolerate, but... Starscream successfully locks onto Rainbow Dash, preparing to fire everything. “Uh-oh…” everyone muttered. Rainbow Dash: Wait... what's that? Starscream's chest reveals his homing missiles. Starscream: Die! “NO!” Twilight screamed not wanting to see her friend getting hurt. He fires the homing missiles, which head toward Rainbow Dash. “RUN!!!” Rainbow screamed to her other self. Rainbow Dash: Oh my gosh! Rainbow Dash flies into the sky and up into the clouds as the missile follow. Starscream stands waiting with his arms crossed in his "Any minute now" pose. Everyone lean forward in their seats as they waited anxiously for the outcome. (*Cues: MLP: FIM - Sonic Rainboom*) Rainbow Dash then flies downward with the missiles still following her, flying so fast that she has broken the sound barrier. She then unleashes the Sonic Rainboom. Starscream is stunned as Rainbow Dash flies right past him, leaving him too late to dodge the homing missiles. They strike, destroying his lower body, as Rainbow Dash smashes into Starscream and then uses her Bucaneer Blaze, which tears Starscream apart off-screen. Rainbow Dash then flies towards Starscream's torso. The group cheered and Lightning Dust and Gilda where even hugging as everyone was just happy to see their friend’s other self was ok. Rainbow Dash: Aw yeah! That was awesome! “I’ll say!” cried out Rainbow Dash, overfilled with joy. (*Cues: Transformers (2008) - Decepticons*) Then Starscream's Spark emerges from his torso, floating in the air. “Oh ya… immortal,” deadpanned Spike. Starscream: You haven't won! I'm invincible! My Spark lives! You can never defeat Star... Twilight was starting to get worried. “He’s right though. How will Rainbow Dash beat him no-” He is cut off by Rainbow Dash, who eats and swallows his Spark. Everyone stares wide eyed and Twilight’s previous question dies in her throat. Rainbow was the First to shake off her shock and give out the biggest grin she’s ever had and said, “So~ Awesome!” K.O.! Results (*Cues: Rainbow Rhapsody - Makkon*) Boomstick: Forget all doubt, that pony is a monster! “Heh I try,” bragged Rainbow Dash as she was checking her hoof in a in a nonchalant way. Wiz: Rainbow's speed and agility were more than a match for the clumsy Starscream, and it doesn't help that his aim is even worse than a Stormtrooper's. Not to mention the Null Ray is designed to destroy electronics, not living ponies. “Just like I said during the fight,” Gilda reminded that she did point that out. Boomstick: She just ate a Transformer! “And it was TASTY!” Rainbow joked, as she rubbed her tummy as if she really did what her DB counter has just done. Getting a few laughs from her friends. Wiz: Yes, and while Rainbow might experience some mild indigestion, Starscream's not going anywhere anytime soon. Boomstick: Well, she put the pwn in pony. Everyone ;laughed at that pun, finding this one at least a little bit funny. Wiz: The winner is Rainbow Dash. “Darn straight I did!” the mare cheered to the heavens. END! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Boomstick: Next time on Death Battle They see smoke and piles of wreckage around. Suddenly, they see a figure walk out the smoke, revealing himself to everyone eyes. A man covered from head to toe in some kind of super armor which is colored grayish-green. His visor is gold which keeps his face hidden from view. Then some text appeared on screen. NEW CHALLENGER! They see the man in armor again who looks more and more like a super soldier as the girls see him using various weapons against some aliens and as he plows through them. His name is also revealed. MASTER CHIEF VS (cues DOOM E1M1 Metal Remix) The music starts off soft but the heavy metal music starts getting louder and louder until it sets off a loud booming heavy metal guitar that nearly send the group flying from the sound waves. They see a fiery blaze and can barely see anything within it. Then, they see a hand punching through a body and it's also gripping the spine. Now they see a helmet, part of it gets torn off and the group see part of his face that shows rage and bloodlust in his eye. His name says it all as he slays demonic monsters with all kinds of awesome weaponry and brutal skills. DOOMGUY ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ “Hey, thanks for watching with us,” Rainbow said to her two friends. “Well we were bored and this seemed like a way to kill some time,” Gilda said nonchalantly, waving a paw in the air. “That and seeing you fight a giant robot was pretty cool,” Lightning Dust said, chuckling a bit. The two weren’t gonna say that they really liked the show, they had to act cool and stuff. They noticed a box began to glow off in the corner of the room. “What’s that?” “It’s just the box the show came in. After each episode, it gives us some stuff on the characters that fought. Wonder what’s in it this time?” Rainbow asked, flying over to the box and opening it. Rainbow’s mouth dropped open in shock, confusing everyone in the room. “What’s inside, Dash?” Spike asked. Rainbow put her hooves inside the box and pulled out a good size trophy with the words ‘Death Battle Winner’ on it. “A trophy, that’s what,” Rainbow said, doing a little victory dance. “And some little figures of us,” Pinkie said, pulling out mini figures of themselves. Rainbow looked at the figures and saw the ones of her friends, causing her to wonder what they’re doing at the moment when she got an idea. “Hey Pinkie, you mind handing me those?” Rainbow asked, looking at the figures. “Sure,” Pinkie said, handing them over. “Thanks. I have to go do something, so I’ll be back in a it. Later,” Rainbow said, flying away. Once in the air, Rainbow started to look around for something. After a few seconds of searching, she flew over Sugarcube Corners and saw something interesting inside. Opening the door, Rainbow flew inside and towards a table were her friends were sitting. “Hey, girls.” Rainbow said, getting their attention. “Hey Dash, what’cha got there?” Applejack asked, seeing the trophy in her friend’s hooves. “Well, it’s just a trophy for the winner of Death Battle,” Rainbow said, holding it out towards her friends. “You really did win?” Rarity asked, shocked by this revelation. “Yeah, and here’s how I did it,” Rainbow said as she started to tell them about the battle. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ CHAPTER END! Next time MASTER CHIEF VS DOOMGUY.
Fox McCloud vs Bucky O'HareAs everyone settled down, Sonata sat down and started to bounce in place. Her two sisters groaned as they took a seat, clearly displeased about their sister’s excitement. “Let’s get this over with,” Aria said, crossing her hooves over her chest. “What’s got you in a bad mood?” Rainbow asked, floating in the air. “You’ll see once this battle starts. We had to deal with Sonata watching that rabbit so many times that it became torture for us,” Adagio said uninterested. “Oh, you girls are just overreacting, how bad can it be?” Rarity asked, enjoying their misery. “You’ll see,” Adagio and Aria said at the same time. “Just start the episode so we can get it over with.” Spike grabbed the remote and pressed play. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Interlude (*Cues: Invader - Jim Johnston*) Wiz: In the depths of space, who knows what awaits mankind? “From what i was able to get from Discord, “a group of weirdos,” said Twilight with a shrug. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~[Meanwhile… with a group of weirdos.]~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ We find our group of gods of chaos and order in the same void of space that we left them in, doing random thing to pass the time. Trepp and Alpha were playing a game of pong using an asteroid as the ball, and Harmony was currently putting Deadman in a The Nagata Lock III submission hold. Trepp suddenly stop during the game letting the asteroid fly past him and crashing into some random planet. “Huh? Is something the matter Trepp?” asked Alpha in worry but he didn’t receive an answer as the blue chaos god just looked up for a few seconds before shaking his head and going back to his usual bored expression. “No it’s nothing… it’s just i had the sudden urge to smack Discord upside the head,” said the bored god of mischief getting an odd look from Alpha. “How about you Deadman?” he asked his fellow chaos god. “ALL I KNOW IS PAIN!!!” scream said chaos god as Harmony tightened her hold on him causing the rest of the group to hear the sound of bones snapping and muscles ripping. “Ya your right, I’m just hearing things,” replaid Trepp completely ignoring his friends real answer in favor of his own. Alpha could only sigh at the insanity that he had to deal with. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~[now back to something somewhat normal.]~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Boomstick: Probably some brain-sucking aliens who need an introduction to my fist. “HECK YA!” cheered Rainbow dash agreeing with Boomstick’s method. Wiz: But what if the final frontier was a little more... furry? Boomstick: Fox McCloud, captain of the Star Fox commandos... Wiz: And Bucky O' Hare, captain of a galactic-wide rebellion. “Whooooo!” cheered Sonata in glee much to her sister’s annoyance. Boomstick: He's Wiz and I'm Boomstick. Wiz: And it's our job to analyze their weapons, armor, and skills, to find out who would win a Death Battle. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Fox McCloud (*Cues: Star Fox Adventures - Main Theme*) General Pepper: It's about time you showed up, Fox. Fox: I'll do my best. Wiz: In his youth, Fox was a pilot prodigy, studying at the Cornerian flight academy. He was raised by his single father James, who founded a team of mercenaries known throughout the universe as Star Fox. “That’s a pretty cool name,” said Rainbow Dash. Background Age: 28 Weight: 59 kg | 130 lbs Height: 173 cm | 5'8" Cornerian Flight Academy drop-out Trained by James McCloud & Peppy Hare Personality was modeled after Shigeru Miyamoto! Seriously! Boomstick: With Pigma, the ugliest pig you've ever seen. “Looks trustworthy enough to me." Said Aria sarcastically. Boomstick: And Peppy, a rabbit older than the greeters at Walmart. Wiz: But it wasn't long before something went horribly wrong... (*Cues: Star Fox (SNES) Intro*) Wiz: The Lylat system had endured decades of peace, but rumblings of civil war stirred. The empire of planet Venom was rising with their new leader Andross... Boomstick: A giant evil monkey with Rayman hands! “Still less bizarre than Discord.” Applejack commented. “And after meeting something like Deadman something like that isn’t too weird anymore,” Twilight said. Wiz: Fearful of triggering a civil war, the Cornerian republic secretly hired the Star Fox freelancers to investigate. But upon arrival, James was betrayed by Pigma, who was secretly in league with the monkey mogul. “That dirty pig!” Yelled the bearer of the element of loyalty, rightfully outraged by the concept of a teammate betraying their comrades. Boomstick: Which is why pigs are for eating, and nothing else. Fox (and Fluttershy): What?! “Mmm~ I could go for some bacon…” Sonata said, licking her lips. “So can Adagio,” snickered Rarity hoping to fluster the siren. But Adagio just smirked at the bearer of Generosity and gave her a half lidded stare. “Oh trust me I am, and when i get back home i’m planning helping myself to some very Special bacon,” Said licking her lips causing Twilight to fume at the siren’s blatant plans for Sunset. (*Cues: Star Fox (SNES) Title Theme*) Wiz: Outraged at the Cornerian government for refusing to respond, Fox McCloud abandoned the academy. “Wait, his father gets killed and the government doesn't even bat an eye?!” Starlight exclaimed in both shock and rage. “What the hell?!” Wiz: Under Peppy's wing, he formed a new Star Fox team, alongside fellow drop-outs Falco Lombardi and Slippy Toad. The result was a squad like nothing seen before. MC: Emergency! Emergency! Incoming enemy fighters. Prepare for launch. (*Cues: Corneria Theme - Star Fox (1993)*) Boomstick: Fox pilots an Arwing, a nimble starfighter with a lot of power. The entire group could only marvel at the sight of the aircraft, taking in the elegant yet obviously aerodynamic design. “It's beautiful…” Rainbow whispered, a single tear leaving her eye. Boomstick: It has twin plasma lasers and can carry up to nine smart bombs, each of which can take out an entire squadron in just one shot. It also creates a reflector shield when Fox does a... well, you know... Peppy (and Pinkie): Do a barrel roll! Rainbow immediately interjected. “That's not a barrel roll.” Pinkie blinked. “Wait, what?” “Well, y’see…” She was about to explain, only for Wiz to do it for her. Wiz: Actually, a barrel roll is when the plane spins in a helix path, as if wrapping around the outside of a barrel. Fox´s trademark maneuver, in which he spins the fighter in place, is technically called an aileron roll. “Yeah, basically everything he just said.” Rainbow nodded. “Awww, another meme ruined!” Pinkie pouted. “Wait, how do you know about that kind of stuff?” Starlight asked. Rainbow smirked. “I'm a Wonderbolt, details like this are covered in basic training.” Boomstick: (Wolf O'Donnell voice) Can't let you do that, Wizard! Wiz: Do what? Boomstick: Ruin the joke! “Too late.” Pinkie mumbled. Arwing T&B-H1 Lasers Upgrades: Twin, Hyper Smart Bombs Carry capacity: 9 G-Diffusion Shielding G-Diffuser NTD-FX1 Plasma Engine A single line of text Max atmospheric speed: Mach 4.2 Wiz: Regardless, the Arwings are equipped with four advanced G-Diffusers, which reduce gravitational forces on pilots in flight. “Hmm… equipment like that could be useful for Pegasus guards and the Wonderbolts…” Twilight mused to herself as she took notes, with Rainbow leaning over her shoulder to get a look. Wiz: Even so, the ultra-fast Arwings exert enormous pressure. Exposure to intense G-forces causes blood to drop from a pilot's brain to his feet. To prevent this, and thus fly the Arwings to the best of their ability, the Star Fox team actually amputated their legs, replacing them with cybernetics. “Woah! Seriously?!” Spike exclaimed. Boomstick: Holy shit! That's some hardcore dedication! “I’ll say!” agreed Rainbow Dash wondering if she would be that willing to go that far for her dreams. (*Cues: Star Wolf Theme - Star Fox: Assault*) Boomstick: When Fox isn't engaged in an aerial dog...er...foxfight, he relies on his trusty blaster pistol, which he always carries. This little beauty has been heavily modified over the years and can charge up a super powerful shot. Wiz: Fox also carries two portable G-Diffusers, one acts as an all-purpose reflector, though he cannot move or attack while using it. The second is a booster pack for highly maneuverable flight. These G-Diffusers allow Fox to manipulate his own gravity to perform two superhuman fighting moves, the speedy Fox Illusion, and the Fire Fox. “Dang, that's impressive.” Applejack smiled. “Hmm… wonder if I could pull that off…” Rainbow thought. “I’m sure you can with a little practice,” Fluttershy said encouragingly. Arsenal & Abilities Blaster Heavily modified Interchangeable modes: Rapid-fire Charge shot Full charge destroys armored turrets Reflector Barrier Repels projectiles, even Arwing lasers Useless against physical impacts Booster Pack Fox Illusion Fire Fox Boomstick: Fox has taken down entire armies on his own, and unlike dear old dead dad, he's defeated Andross not once, but twice. “And finally avenging his dad.” Said Starlight with a proud smile. Strengths & Feats Jack of All Trades, lacking in none Cool & collected Killed Andross twice, plus a clone Ended the Lylat Wars Regularly bests Star Wolf Battled a whole planet of dinosaurs Stopped the Aparoid Invasion Defeated the Anglar Emperor Wiz: He is absolutely fearless, though he often relies on his brainier wingmates to handle strategy and intel. Boomstick: 'Cause when he comes up with a plan, he ends up falling into a black hole! "Clever like a fox", my ass. Everyone laughed at this. Weaknesses Jack of All Trades, best in none Not very cunning Shoots first, asks questions later... sometimes a good thing Doomed to a pathetic & lonely existence for no good reason after Star Fox Command on DS Wiz: Regardless, he has proven himself more than capable of saving the day on his own, time and time again, he is the leader of the second generation of Star Fox, the greatest commando team in the galaxy. And that alone should prove one thing... Boomstick: You don't fuck around with Fox McCloud! Fox: I see 'em up ahead! Let's rock and roll! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ The group were impressed and had great respect for the star Fox commander. “I’m sure if he was a member of the wonderbolts he would be one of the greatest,” said Rainbow Dash with nothing but respect in her voice. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Bucky O'Hare Wiz: I know what you're thinking, "Just who is Captain Bucky O'Hare?" Well, prepare to be reminded or introduced to the greatest cartoon rabbit since Bugs Bunny. As the music started up, Sonata started bouncing around with glee while Aria and Adagio held their ears in dismay. “Why?! Why did they have to bring this song back?!” Aria groaned in anger. Suddenly, Sonata started to sing, with Pinkie happily joining in. (*Cues: Bucky O'Hare - Theme Song*) Sonata: In another dimension, another time and space! Pinkie: A parallel universe was fallin' on its face! Sonata: When out of the chaos, who else could it be? Both: But the animal adventurers of S.P.A.C.E.! Sonata: Bucky, Captain Bucky O'Hare! He goes where no ordinary rabbit would dare! Pinkie: If your Righteous Indignation has suffered a hit- Sonata: And your photon accelerator's broken a bit- Pinkie: And you're losing your mind, and your having a fit- Both: Get the funky fresh rabbit who can take care of it! Spike and Rainbow Dash join in: Bucky, Captain Bucky O'Hare! Pinkie and Sonata: You say Bucky? I said Bucky! Rainbow and Spike: Bucky O'Hare!! Sonata: Let's croak up some toads!! (toad croaks) “Well that was a fun little song.” Starlight smiled as she applauded their performance before turning to Aria and Adagio. “I don't see why you two were so bothered by it…” Aria groaned. "Ever since the show came out, she wouldn't stop singing that stupid song over and over and over again!” “When the show finally ended we thought we'd finally heard the end of that stupid song!" Adagio continued. “AND NOW IT’S STUCK IN OUR HEADS AGAIN!!” Rarity couldn't help but giggle at this. (*Cues: Green Planet (J64 Mix) - Bucky O'Hare*) Boomstick: (singing) Bucky, Captain Bucky O'Hare! Ha ha, oh, the '80s. Wiz: Graduate of the esteemed Genus Academy and trained in combat by the mysterious warrior Damaron Jabok, Bucky O'Hare and his motley crew defend the Aniverse – yes, the 'Aniverse' – from the evil Toad Empire, who are basically amphibian Nazis... if Hitler was Skynet. “Who’s Hitler?” asked Fluttershy meekly but quickly hid behind her doom plushie once she saw the dark looks from the sirens and even Twilight. “Trust me fluttershy you don’t want to know,” growled out the princess of friendship remembering what she read about the desist leader of Germany. “We might of been bad guys but even we saw what he did a pure evil,” stated Aria in a foul mood. Nodding her head Adagio said, “ even we wouldn't go that far.” “A REAL monster,” hissed out Sonata. Boomstick: I bet you wanna watch the show now, huh? Komplex: Do I have your undivided attention now? Everyone shuddered at the sound of his voice. Background Age: Mid 20s Weight: Approx. 45 kg | 100 lbs Height: 150 cm | 4'11" Genus Academy graduate Trained by Damaron Jabok Comic book concept originally created in 1978 (*Cues: Unknown theme*) Boomstick: Bucky captains the best-named spaceship of all time, the Righteous Indignation... “Oh my gosh that name is AWESOME!” Rainbow squeed. “When I get my own Wonderbolts Team I'm totally naming it that!” Boomstick: ...which is now the new name for my penis! “...aaaaand Boomstick ruined it.” She groaned while the Dazzlings giggled. Wiz: Ahem, this tough frigate needs a full crew to operate, but its pivoting Maser Cannon packs a deadly punch. Boomstick: Enough about my genitals, Wiz, let's get back to the rabbit! Pinkie and the Dazzlings snickered, Rarity simply rolled her eyes. Righteous Indignation First space frigate of S.P.A.C.E. 1 Master Cannon Standard sub-light speed drive Aldeberan sensors & scanners Houses 1 Toad Croaker speeder Heavily modified Betelgeusian Banana Runner Boomstick: Bucky's no slouch on the ground, he always carries one automatic laser pistol, powerful enough to slice through solid metal, he also brings along two energy grenades. When detonated, the resulting blast is massive. Wiz: Bucky also wears a very reliable jetpack, which is fast enough to apparently outrace explosions, the velocity of a detonation can reach over 2,000 meters per second. This means in zero-G, Bucky's jetpack can reach speeds over mach-five, which would turn any normal rabbit into mush. “Eeep!” squicked out a green faced Fluttershy thinking of angel bunny going that fast. “I totally want a jetpack that can fly that fast!” Pinkie said, with Sonata cheering in agreement. Arsenal & Abilities Laser Pistol Automatic Self-cleaning Can fire a constant stream Grenades Carries 2 Thrown detonation: Small, concentrated blast Manual detonation: Large, uncontrolled blast Jetpack Boomstick: But not this funky, fresh rabbit! And yes, that's a direct quote. “Sure is!” cheered Sonata who was about to sing the song again but some glares from her sister’s made her stop. Wiz: Bucky will avoid a fight if can, preferring to outsmart his opponents rather than resort to brute force. Bucky O'Hare: I got some serious pondering to do. “A wise strategy…” Said Starlight. Boomstick: However, he's a skilled martial artist, an expert marksman, and his acrobatic ability is legendary. He can leap well over one hundred feet in the air with a single hop. "that's pretty impressive for rabbit," complemented Applejack. Strengths & Feats Legendary acrobatic ability Smart & cunning Expert marksman Can leap over 30 m / 100 ft Ended the Toad Wars Defeated Komplex twice Led galaxy-wide resistance Wiz: He's a cunning warrior and leader. Bucky is responsible for constructing a massive, galactic-wide army to combat the Toad Empire, and succeeded in dethroning their robotic ruler, Komplex, not once, but twice. Boomstick: Anyone who would dare to fight, should beware the deadly Captain Bucky O'Hare. Weaknesses Lacks defensive gear Far too trusting of strangers Heavily relies on crew in combat Bucky O'Hare: Attention all hands, battle stations! Bucky, Jenny, and Dead-Eye: Let's croak toads! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ “YAY GO BUCKY!!” cheered Sonata as the young siren getting ready to sing her favorite cartoon theme but another glare from Adagio stopped her. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Death Battle (*Cues: Unknown theme*) We open with the classic Star Fox crew in their Arwings. Fox: "We're heading out! All aircraft report." Peppy : "This is Peppy, all systems go!" Slippy : "Don't forget me!" Slippy's ship flies in. "teehee! silly Slippy!" laughed Pinkie Pie. Falco : "Slippy, what are you doing? Hurry up!" The Righteous Indignation arrives. Slippy: "Don't worry." Bucky: "Attention all hands, battle stations." Fox: "Huh?" "... I can see where this is going," muttered Twilight. Bucky: "Let's croak toads!!" "oh..." the rest of the group muttered. Peppy: "Slippy, watch out!" Bucky begins to shoot Slippy's ship with a Maser Cannon. Slippy: "Ah! I'm hit! Fox!!!" Slippy's ship blows up. "SLIPPY NO!" cried Fluttershy. Bucky: "Mission accomplished!" “Wait, did the just kill Slippy... because he was a toad?” Spike asked in both sorrow and a bit of anger. “That's kinda racist.” “Well in the show ALL amphibians were evil so you can’t really blame Bucky for attacking a member of a race that has ether enslaved an entire race or wiped it out,” said Sonata surprising everyone who thought she was just a air head. Fox retaliates and shoots down Bucky's ship using a smart bomb, causing it to explode and plummet down towards a strange planet. “No! Not the Righteous Indignation!” Cried out Sonata. “Aw man! I wanted to see a space fight!” Pinkie complained. Falco: "Scratch one bogey." Fox: There's one more to go. Fox follows Bucky's ship down onto the planet. The following title card appears: DEATH BATTLE! No. 30 ??? Random ass planet Fox McCloud VS Bucky O'Hare ........................ (*Cues: Asteroid Belt - Star Fox Assault*) On the planet, the Righteous Indignation is destroyed. As Fox's Arwing lands, Bucky jumps out of the wreckage. Fox then jumps out of his Arwing. “Congratulations Bucky.”Adagio commented. “You killed that guy's friend and now he's out for blood.” “This should prove interesting…” Aria smirked. Fox: Come on! FIGHT! Fox runs towards Bucky as he tries to jump away from his opponent, but Fox uses his Fox Illusion to dash by Bucky. He then proceeds to kick Bucky repeatedly, but misses his last strike as the rabbit sidesteps behind him. Fox notices, but can't do anything as Bucky kicks him upwards three times then punches him into the Righteous Indignation wreckage. “That was for the Righteous Indignation and it’s crew, Fox!” yelled Sonata with a raised hoof. (*Cues: Aparoid City - Star Fox Assault*) Bucky walks forward and fires his laser, but Fox uses the reflector to sent it back to Bucky who barely dodges it and hides behind the boulder. Fox uses his blaster pistol multiple shots, then super charges his shot, as Bucky sees that Fox is about to launch it, he hops out of there and blasted the boulder into rubble. Fox sees Bucky up in the air and tries to use his blaster pistol in the air, but Bucky hops over Fox, crushing him, after hopping a third time, Fox charges upwards from his booster pack creating the Fire Fox maneuver. “Man Fox would of been a pancake if he didn’t have his fire fox move,” commented Spike. (*Cues: SSBB - Corneria Theme*) Fox is now in aerial positions, and shoots but Bucky evades from each of the charged shots. Both leaders are now shooting and evading in the air, then fires a grenade at Fox, then Fox uses his Reflector shield and sends back to the user. Fox then fights Bucky with a barrage of aerial attacks. As Fox uses the Fox Illusion, Bucky latches and hangs onto Fox while he's trying to force him to let go as he later used the Reflector. Bucky shoots the booster pack, sending him back to the ground. “Now it’s an even playing field!” cheered Applejack as she was getting into the fight. “Now let's see who has the better skill fighting on land, a fox or a rabbit.” said Rarity as she too was getting into the fight. (*Cues: Boss 3 - Star Fox Assault*) Bucky then fires barrage of blaster shots as Fox uses the Reflector. As he continues, he throws a grenade close to where Fox is standing. Knowing that Fox can't move while using it, which Fox manages to dodge using the Fox Illusion maneuver, but ends up losing his bionic legs. “Oh dear.” muttered Fluttershy as she hated this episode for having to animal critters fighting so brutally. (*Cues: Aparoid Queen 2 - Star Fox Assault*) However, Fox manages to get another jet pack up and running, and crashes into Bucky. He then chokes Bucky, “...... no.” whispered Sonata with fear in her voice. (*Cues: Andross - Star Fox 64*) then blows his head off with a charged beam to the face. K.O. “BUCKY, NOOOOOO!!!!” Sonata cried. “YESSSSSSS!!!” cheered Adagio and Aria. Fox is seen standing next to the dead Slippy Toad and rips off his legs and replaces them on his as he flies away on his Arwing as Blinky assesses the damage. Results (*Cues: Opening Theme - Star Fox Assault*) Blinky: Calamity and woe! Wiz: Calamity and woe indeed. Bucky's long awaited spotlight didn't last long. “No~!” cried Sonata. Boomstick: Considering foxes eat hares, I'm not surprised. This causes Sonaya to cry harder. “There there,” soothed Fluttershy as she patted the former sirens back. Wiz: ...Right. First off, yes, the Arwing trumped the Righteous Indignation, as its weaponry, shielding and maneuverability were simply outclassed. Boomstick: But not before croaking the worst toad of all time. Slippy: Fox!!! (*Slippy's Arwing is destroyed*) Boomstick: Hehe, I love this job. Fluttershy’s eye twitched. Boomstick: Bucky's ship was a tough old bird, so a fight on the ground was inevitable. Wiz: Both Fox and Bucky had blow by blow counters. Fox's Reflector and Bucky's acrobatics could avoid laser fire. Fox is fearless, but Bucky is cunning. Fox is faster on land, “This two just seem to counter each other,” commented Starlight as she kept trying to find out what broke the stalemate. (*Cues: Great Fox Rock - Star Fox Adventures*) Wiz: but Bucky is faster in the air. The deciding factor was experience. “Shining all ways told be experience can trump even the strongest of soldiers,” said Twilight as she remembered her brother words on the subject of being a solder. Boomstick: Fox has been a major player in more wars than Bucky, and single-handedly ended all of them. Wiz: At his own request. Fox: I'll go it alone from here. “I think i just found somepony new to look up to,” said Rainbow Dash as she put Fox right up there with the wonderbolts from the past when it came to ponies to look up to. Boomstick: Like a real man... fox... fox-man! Wiz: Also, Bucky always had a squad of troops at his back during ground combats. But when Star Fox does an away mission, Fox is usually all on his own, even when fighting an entire planet of dinosaurs. “He fought a PLANET full of dinosaurs!?” THAT. IS. AWESOME!!” Rainbow cheered. Boomstick: In the end, Bucky choked. “Boo!” yelled Sonata. Wiz: The winner is Fox McCloud. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Boomstick: Next time on Death Battle. (Cues Terminator Theme) The group sees a creepy looking robot facing off against another that looks more like a cyborg with a visor covering his upper face. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ “Well at least that’s over,” Aria said, getting to her hooves as Adagio nodded. “Yes, now let’s just get the stuff from the box and get out of here,” Adagio said, pushing her purple haired sister towards the box. Sonata sighed as she followed them, feeling a bit sad at the outcome of the battle. Once everyone was near the glowing box, Pinkie opened it and looked inside. She stuck her head and arms inside tossed a small box to Fluttershy and then pulled out a replica of Fox’s airwing while saying, “Oooohhhh.” “What is it, Pinkie?” Starlight asked, looking at the tiny ship in interest. Looking at her friends, Pinkie said, “There’s a bunch of these ships and things in here.” “Things?” Twilight asked. “Yeah,” Pinkie said, reaching into the box. She pulled out a grey square with a few short silver things on it and said, “There’s a bunch of these things in here.” “Let me see,” Adagio said, walking towards the pink mare. Looking at the thing in Pinkie’s hoof, Adagio takes it and began to move the silver things around causing the ship to float out of Pinkie’s hoof. “Woah, those things can fly?” Rainbow asked surprisingly. “They can as they’re remote controlled cars or ships in that sense,” Adagio said, handing the controller to Pinkie. “They’re a somewhat popular toy that kids play with but you need a controller to make them fly or move.” Everyone grabs one as Spike reached into the box and pulled out another familiar space ship and package. Looking at Sonata, Spike said, “Hey Sonata, there’s something here for you.” Be the curious mare, Sonata walked towards the baby dragon to see what he meant and gasped. In his claws was a replica of Bucky’s ship and a wrapped package the size of a shoe box. Sonata took the pack and ripped off the wrapping to a red cloth and a green bunny ears headband. “Oh my gosh,” Sonata said, pulling the cloth and unfolded it to see a familiar jumpsuit and cape. “I always wanted something like this,” she said, hugging the jumpsuit like a stuffed animal. “I think there's something else in there,” Rainbow said, flying above the former siren. Being the curious girl she was, Sonata looked inside the box to see another wrapped package. Tearing the wrapping apart, Sonata gasped as she pulled out a CD. “Oh my gosh! It's the extended version of Bucky’s theme song!” Aria and Adagio could only gasp in horror. “NO! NOT AGAIN!” They both shouted, making a dive for the disk… only for Rarity to levitate it away and into the TV slot with a malicious grin. “WHY?!” “You made me suffer through the last battle, I feel it's only fitting that I return the favor.” The music started up again as Sonata, Pinkie, Rainbow Dash, Spike, and surprisingly Starlight started to sing. Rainbow: In another dimension, another time and space, Sonata: A parallel universe was fallin' on its face! Spike: When out of the chaos, who else could it be? Starlight: But the animal adventurers from S.P.A.C.E.! Sonata and Pinkie: Bucky! Captain Bucky O'Hare! Mutants and aliens and toads beware! Rainbow: You're looking for adventure? Well, this is it, with Jenny, Deadeye, Blinky, and Willy DuWitt! Spike: I said Bucky! Captain Bucky O'Hare! Pinkie (in a business suit): “And now, an update on Bucky O'Hare and the Toad Wars!” Sonata and Rainbow: In the battle of the aniverse, you don't know what's next! You only know amphibians have made it KOMPLEX! Starlight and Spike: When you check out your scanner and the evil that it bodes, There's only one course of action: Everyone: Let's croak us some toads! Sonata and Pinkie: Bucky! Captain Bucky O'Hare! He goes where no ordinary rabbit would dare! Rainbow: If your Righteous Indignation has suffered a hit, And your photon accelerator's broken a bit, Starlight: And you're losing your mind, and you're having a fit, Get the funky fresh rabbit who can take care of it! Spike and Sonata: Bucky! Captain Bucky O'Hare! You say Bucky? I said Bucky! Bucky O'Hare! Everyone: Let's croak us some toads! Aria’s eye began to twitch as Adagio sighed and said, “Can we go already?” To everyone’s shock, a portal opened up near the former sirens causing everyone to jump. Adagio, not looking a gift horse in the mouth, quickly pulled Aria towards the portal and said, “C’mon Sonata, our rides here.” “Aw, do we have to?” Sonata asked sadly. “Yes Sonata, now say goodbye so we can get home,” Adagio said, pushing Aria through the portal. “Alright. Bye everyone. Hope we can do this again,” Sonata said while walking into the portal with her stuff. As she disappeared from sight, Adagio looked at the ponies and dragon as she said, “Goodbye and we’ll most likely be back.” She started to walk into the portal as she loudly muttered, “Now for my plans.” Once the sirens were gone the portal closed up with a popping noise almost like the sound of a pop bubble. Twilight confused by that just turned to her friends and asked, “Same time tomorrow?” “Eeyup,” everyone said as they started to either leave and go home or go to their rooms. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~( later at fluttershy’s house.)~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ The shy Pegasus returned to see Angel Bunny sulking next to his bed, which Pichu was now sleeping in. His charred black fur a clear indication of how many times he'd tried to make him move by force. “Now Angel Bunny, I told you need to share.” Fluttershy scolded the spoiled rabbit before pulling out a small box. "But I have some good news, there was a small box that I got after the battle and it has your name on it!” The rabbit’s face immediately lit up with joy as he lept towards the box, but the moment it was open and he immediately backed away in fear, however his owner didn't notice. "It looks adorable! Let's hurry up and put it on you!” She squealed as she grabbed him and hastily stuffed him into the outfit. As Pichu woke up from his nap, the first thing he saw was what this wild rabbit had been forced to wear: Angel Bunny was wearing a small red space uniform with yellow boots, gloves and belt, marking him look like a miniature Bucky O’hare. Pichu stared at him for a full five seconds before he burst out laughing. (Meanwhile in the human world) Sunset let out a sigh as she walked home from the shooting range. After watching that strange show, she decided to fish out her old rifle from her closet. Once she got the weapon cleaned up, she started to go to the shooting range every so often to practice. Now all Sunset wanted to do was to lay on her bed and sleep. Opening the door to her apartment, Sunset said, “Home sweet home.” She was just about to prop her rifle against the wall when she noticed the light on in the living room from the hallway. “I’m sure I turned that off this morning,” Sunset said, holding the rifle in her hands as she walked to the living room slowly. Nearing the corner, Sunset took a moment to prepare herself before taking rounding that corner. The moment Sunset entered the living room, she wasn’t prepared for what she saw. There lying on the couch was none other than Adagio Dazzle, former siren and leader of the Dazzlings. While Sunset was used to seeing the puffy haired girl wasn’t anything new, the outfit she had on was certainly an eye catcher. Adagio wore a purple outfit that consisted of legging, long gloves, a strange armor on the left arm and a bikini top. The former siren stretched causing her breasts to jiggle as Sunset almost dropped her gun. Looking at the stunned girl, Adagio smiled coyly and said, “I know there’s probably a million questions going through your head right but the one thing you should be wondering is….” Adagio rose to the point where she was in a sitting position with her legs spread apart slightly. Looking at the gaping girl, Adagio gave her a saucy smile with half lidded eyes as she said, “What should I be doing next?” Sunset just stared at the girl in silence for a few moments, trying to understand the whole situation. She slowly lowers the gun and says, “I really need a fucking smoke.” Let’s just say cursing was the other thing that Sunset picked up from watching the show. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ CHAPTER END! NEXT TIME, TERMINATOR VS ROBOCOP!
Iron Man VS Lex Luthor. (Flash Notion version)Trepp turned another page of the Douglas Adams novel, trying to ignore what was happening a parsec over. Finally though, he could stand it no longer. He dog-eared his page and slammed the book down on a table of his own making. “Would you two keep it down!” Harmony looked up and frowned. “What's the problem?” “I'm trying to understand the secret of life, the universe, and everything, and I can't concentrate over-” “SOMEBODY FUCKING HELP ME!” Deadman shrieked. “-Over that.” Trepp raised his equivalent of an eyebrow. “I suppose I have to ask if he's all right.” Harmony had Deadman strung up between celestial bodies; his head and arms were chained to a couple of quasars while black holes pulled at his feet. A snap of her fingers conjured an acid vat a couple light-years across above him. “He's fine,” she said flippantly. “I AM NOT FINE YOU BITCH!” Trepp shrugged. “Okay then. Just put a sock in him or something.” He picked up his book and leaned back again. “HA! THERE ISN”T A MUZZLE THICK ENOUGH TO-” Harmony waved her hand, and an asteroid lodged itself in Deadman's open mouth. “Mrrmph!” he tried to yell. “Hmm-hrungh!” “Hey everypony, what's up!” The cheerful voice made all of the gods wince. “Oh, yes, this is exactly what this day needed,” Trepp muttered as he turned another page. “Hey, Deadman! Hey Harmony!” Another, smaller being popped into the ethereal plane. He looked distinctly pony-ish, with purple fur and golden mane and tail. He had a short muzzle, large eyes, and a unicorn horn. He even had hooves. He also had arms with hands, and he stood upright. He wore a full business suit, but it didn't fit him well. The pant legs were far too long, and he was lost inside the huge jacket. “Forgetting someone, aren't you boy?” Alpha reminded him. “Oh! Of course not; hello Alpha, sir!” he saluted. “Flash Notion,” Harmony mused. “Shouldn't you be off torturing an alicorn princess?” Flash pouted. “Probably. But I was more interested in what you guys were doing. There's been a lot of noise over here lately.” Deadman tried to scream again, but it came out as a choking cough. “Ignore him,” Harmony advised. “Not a problem.” Flash was more than happy to ignore the plight of Deadman. It was what the elder god had taught him, in fact. “So what's going on- aside from the obvious?” Trepp felt a tingle, and looked up to see all the gods- even Deadman, who was starting to develop a hole in his stomach from the acid- looking at him. “What?” “Isn't it obvious?” Alpha unsheathed his gigantic sword. And started polishing it. “Tell the kid.” “Why me?” “Because your friend,” Harmony ground her teeth, “Is the one responsible for all this. And you're responsible for him.” “I never agreed to that,” Trepp muttered. “Fine!” He held up his hands before the others could protest. He leaned down to speak with Flash more at the young god's level. “Deadman got the bright idea to send the ponies a gift- a television and every episode of Death Battle on DVD.” “Death Battle!” Flash's eyes widened with excitement. “I love that show! Can I watch, too?” “Erm-” Trepp hesitated. “Let 'im,” Alpha declared. “Might do him some good, see why he should be helping people instead of making their lives miserable, the way you two do.” “Hey, I help,” Trepp protested. “I add that little bit of spice that keeps them from getting bored out of their minds. The way I am.” “Mrrrrmph!” Deadman shouted. He seemed to be agreeing with Trepp, though it was hard to tell. “Whatever. The kid can stay.” Trepp gave Harmony a pleading look. She simply rolled her eyes. “He might as well. Deadman's going to be busy a while, and none of us are going to do his usual schtick.” Flash floated up through the void towards Trepp. “What is she they talking about?” “She's talking about the box,” Trepp muttered. “Every time the ponies watch a battle, they receive presents from Deadman via a box he placed in the world. Occasionally, we have to clarify certain aspects of the characters for them as well. So we toss notes through. Things like that; but since Deadman is otherwise occupied...” “I'd love to do it!” Flash bounced up and down, even though he was floating. “What battle are they watching next?” Trepp cast a bored glance down at Equestria. “Iron Man versus Lex Luthor. Flash gasped. “Ohmigosh! I love that battle! Oh, thank you thank you thank you!” He bounced around space for a moment, then remembered who all was watching. “Oh, um-” He straightened his suit as best as he could. “Thank you, Alpha,” he said politely. “Thank you, Harmony, Trepp.” They all nodded. “Right!” Flash rubbed his hands together, and a slightly mad gleam entered his eyes. “Let's get started!” ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~In ponyville~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Pinkie was polishing the muscles on her life-size statue of Kratos, while wearing her fake mustache and glancing at the picture of her with White Bomberman and Michelangelo. “Continuity!” Flash yelled. Pinkie set down her polishing cloth with a frown. “Something feels... different today,” she mused. Quite suddenly and conveniently, she was distracted by a glowing vibration on her haunches. “Huh! My cutie mark!” The triplicate of balloons floated out the window, and Pinkie started to follow. She hesitated at the last moment, then took off the mustache. “I should leave that here,” she decided. Then she hopped out the top floor of Sugarcube Corner. Five minutes later Pinkie burst into the Castle of Friendship. “Twilight! My cutie mark-” She stopped when she saw that all of her friends were there, too. “Oooo-oooh. Did you girls get called, too?” “Indeed,” Rarity said with a sniff. “And I was just about to finish up the stitching on my latest project- I'm a bit behind, I'll admit.” “No way- you?” Rainbow couldn't help but laugh. “Lemme guess- you're still trying to find a way to make Deadpool's outfit fit your standards?” Rarity thought of the pile of red and black fabric she had burned yesterday. “I've given up on that, actually. He'll simply have to remain hideous forever.” “Screw you!” The group winced at the familiar voice. “But I'll have to check my schedule first, we all know I'm quite busy with the ladies. Let's see... my penis has an opening next Thursday?” Rarity gagged and fanned herself. “How... uncouth.” “Awww, you know you love me. Mmm-wah!” She actually felt the air kiss somehow. “Hey!” Pinkie glared at the air in front of Rarity. “You're not supposed to show up again until Season Four! We're still on Season Two! Get lost.” “It's actually the end of Season Three that I come back, and it will be awesome. You're supposed to be a party planner, not a party pooper,” Deadpool's disembodied voice muttered. “Whatever. See ya around, Pinkster!” It faded out on the last word. “Well that was... different,” Twilight observed. “In any case, yes, we've all been summoned by the map.” She rested a hoof on the glowing crystal. “Strange though. Our cutie marks are all hovering... here.” Fluttershy frowned at the map. “You don't suppose there's a friendship problem with us, do you?” “That's ridiculous,” Applejack chuckled. “Why, we ain't had any problems in ages! I certainly ain't holdin' nothin' against anypony.” “That's right!” A new voice emanated from the map. “Oh, for Celestia's sake,” Twilight muttered. It was getting hard to keep track of all the different disembodied voices they'd encountered. “There's no friendship problem,” the voice announced. The holograms on the map swirled until they formed into a six-foot tall humanoid pony creature wearing an over-sized business suit. Flash Notion stepped down and smiled at them. “I simply needed you all to get here, and this was the fastest way I could think of.” Twilight glared at him. “So you used our map- one of the most powerful tools of harmony in the universe, as a pager?” Flash shrugged. “Truly sorry about that. But it will all be worth it, I promise you. My name is Flash Notion, and I'm a friend of Deadman's.” “NO HE ISN'T!” The voice of the chaos god echoed through the chamber. “Fine!” Flash rolled his eyes. “But I do know him. And I'm filling in for him this week!” “Does that mean what I think it means?” Rainbow asked, excited. “Yep!” Flash snapped his fingers, and suddenly all the ponies were in Twilight's living room. “It's time for a Death Battle!” “Um... couldn't you have just done that to get us here?” Fluttershy asked. Flash waved her question aside. “You're in for a real treat today. My personal favorite battle. Here's some snacks-” He snapped his fingers, and a buffet of popcorn, ice cream, and cakes appeared. Pinkie's tongue fell out of her mouth. “Some mood lighting-” Another snap, and the curtains drew over the windows; in the room, strips of LEDs along the floor glowed first green, then red and gold, then green again, and so on. “And finally, some comfort.” Flash gave a final snap, and the ponies were joined by their favorite Death Battle-based possessions. Fluttershy clutched her Doomie close to her chest and sighed. “Yay,” she smiled. Pinkie stroked her mustache. “So that's why I left that at home...” Rarity admired the way she looked in her Zelda dress; it was accessorized perfectly with Cloud's ribbon. Twilight smiled at the webshooter on her foreleg. “Ooh, I almost forgot about this. Note to self: try out that duplication spell later.” Rainbow set down the autographed picture of herself and Sonic. She then positioned herself between it and her friends, though they had all seen it. Only Applejack was left without a significant piece of loot. She looked around and raised an eyebrow. “Ah don't want to sound selfish, but where's mah stuff? Ah know ah brought home plenty from that there box.” Flash looked just as surprised. “Hmm. I suppose you simply haven't yet taken home anything of true personal value. Not like Rainbow with her interspecies romance, or Fluttershy with her stuffed guardian.” “Ah guess,” Applejack looked downcast. “Cheer up,” Flash assured her. “I imagine it's simply a matter of time.” He glanced at his bare wrist. “Speaking of, it's time to start the battle. Happy watching!” Flash faded out of sight as the familiar drums and guitar came through the television speakers. The ponies perked up at seeing the words, DEATH BATTLE. “Technology,” Wiz lectured. “It improves our lives, lets you watch cool shows on the internet- and sometimes, it can help you to rival gods.” The ponies collectively oohed and awed as they watched the metal-suited humans move onscreen. “Spike will not be happy with me,” Twilight predicted, levitating a notebook and quill. “Like with Iron Man, the Armored Avenger,” Boomstick proclaimed. “And Lex Luthor, arch-nemesis of Superman.” “WHAT!” They all shouted. “No way,” Rainbow declared. “Superman's arch-nemesis is a guy in a suit? That is soooo lame!” “I dunno, sugarcube.” Applejack scratched at her chin. “Seems like if an Earth Pony got all suited up and fought Princess Celestia. You'd have to admire 'em, no matter how bad they were.” “He does seem awfully brave,” Fluttershy put out. “Shh!” Twilight hushed them. “I don't want to miss any details.” “-S our job to analyze their weapons, armor, and skills to find out who would win a Death Battle,” Wiz was just finishing up. As he did, the screen showed the usual fight preview. “Whoo! Three dimensions!” Pinkie cheered. “My word,” Rarity pointed. “Is that a Gundam?” “Huh.” The others nodded. “Weird.” The logo slammed shut, indicating it was time for the first combatant's run-through. Instantly, hard guitar riffs ripped through the air. Rainbow Dash headbanged righteously. “Aw yeah!” she cried. “This guy's gonna be cool.” “There are the talented,” Wiz said. “There are the prodigies...” Onscreen, armor plating unfolded over a muscle-bound man. “And then, there's Anthony Edward Stark.” The man, sporting a rather awesome beard and mustache, donned the helmet of his suit. “Please,” Boomstick jumped in. “He prefers Tony.” “Howard and Maria Stark ruled a nine billion dollar military tech empire. They could have anything they ever wanted... Except a child.” “Oh, that would just be awful,” Fluttershy sniffed. “I mean, to want a foal, but never be able to have one? Can you think of anything sadder?” “Then Howard met- an ALIEN who decided to build a baby for them!” Boomstick sounded incredulous. “WHAT!” Pinkie agreed. “Fearing humanity would perish to more advanced alien races, this child was genetically engineered to lead the world to a new tech age- buuuuut that was Arno Stark. We don't speak of him.” Wiz quickly moved on. “When Howard and Maria were dissapointed with what they created, they adopted Tony instead.” “Yep,” Boomstick was amused. “That's the 'secret origin' of Tony Stark. Didn't see that comin', did ya?” The ponies couldn't help but laughing at the comic page. The dull look on Tony's face perfectly summed up their own feelings about his origin story. “Despite not being the alien-engineered child of prodigy, Tony's gifted intelligence and world-changing destiny were obvious at an early age.” Twilight listened to Wiz with one ear while writing down everything onscreen. These battles sure were educational! Real name: Anthony Edward Stark Aliases: Armored Avenger, Shellhead, Master of Machines Height: 6'1'' | 185 cm Weight: 225 lbs | 102 kg Estimated net worth: $9.3 billion Owner of Area 51 Claims to have beaten Mr. Fantastic in chess twice ”He graduated from MIT with top honors- and a physics and engineering double major- when he was just 19 years old.” Twilight whistled as Wiz wrapped up Tony's education. Having been to a human world, she understood just how impressive the feat was. Sure, there were humans who graduated faster, but they didn't usually have double majors and achieve the highest possible position in their class. “But since this is a superhero origin, it wasn't long before tragedy struck.” In spite of how insensitive Boomstick was, Rainbow couldn't help but gloat over her accuracy. “See! It's like I said: the hero's parents always die. It's ridiculous.” “We don't know that they're dead,” Rarity tried to say. At the same time, Boomstick continued: “And by 'struck', I mean a car crash, and by 'tragedy' I mean his parents... so all of a sudden, Tony was an orphan.” “Dammit, Boomstick!” "But on the bright side, it also made him the sole heir of Stark Industries. Nice.” “Ah'm pretty sure a mountain o' bits ain't gonna make up fer dead parents,” Applejack grunted. The others exchanged meaningful glances. “What?” she asked. “Oh, nothing,” Twilight motioned for them all to turn back to the TV. “With the entire family fortune at his fingertips, Tony pursued a life of reckless indulgence and mechanical tinkering.” “Oh my,” Rarity blushed at the sight of Tony and a woman passionately kissing. Twilight glanced up and saw him taking apart an engine, and she blushed as well. “War was his income,” Wiz continued, “And he enjoyed every bit of it- until the day his eyes were opened.” “Yeah, opened with a shrapnel-filled irony bomb!” They winced when they saw the missile bearing Tony's name land right beside him. “Move!” Rainbow yelled. The bomb exploded just as Tony got to his feet, and he collapsed against the sand, blood oozing out of his chest. “Too late,” Fluttershy winced, holding up her Doomie. “Held captive by terrorists in Afghanistan, Tony learned the bomb left shrapnel in his heart; which would kill him in a week,” Wiz explained. Twilight winced in sympathy, remembering how many times her own projects had blown up in her face. Rarity also winced, but at the terrible grammar of the comic book. “Really, now,” she muttered. “What were those writers thinking?” “That's RACIST!” Pinkie yelled, almost incoherently. “I thought that was a dead meme?” Flash's voice was heard in the Pink Party Pony's Head. “Eh- not yet.” replied Pinkie. Wiz continued: “The terrorists gave Tony an ultimatum: construct weapons for them and receive treatment... or be left to die.” “But being Tony Stark, he chose door number three.” Twilight felt a chill run down her spine as she watched Tony hammering at a piece of metal. She sensed that what happened today would be vital to her work, somehow. And... something else, too. “He built a space age pacemaker to save his own life. And then built a mech-suit around it and murdered his way to freedom!” Boomstick laughed. “This taught Stark one of life's most important lessons: heroes aren't born.” Tony slammed the metal mask down on a table, and Twilight felt the same chill. “They're built. A lesson which also made for a pretty sweet tag-line.” “Wow!” Rainbow gaped at the alicorn princess. “Twilight?” Twilight looked around, not understanding. “What? What's wrong?” Rainbow giggled, then burst out laughing. “Ha ha- I should've known! Super-genius and super-awesome! He's just your type.” “Huh?” “Er- darling?” Rarity pointed, seeming quite embarrassed. Her cheeks were as red as Twilight had ever seen.Twilight followed Rarity's hoof to her own body. To her wings, which were pointed straight up at the ceiling. “Oh. Wait- no!” Twilight protested. “No way- it was the suit, that's all! Look, it's amazing!” She pointed at the screen, which showed Tony walk out of a cave encased in a heavy-looking sheath of armor. “My turn,” he hissed, and then cut loose with a pair of flamethrowers, blowing the entire terrorist compound to smithereens. Out of the fireball flew the man in the suit, seeming to ride the explosion; heavy guitar riffs accompanied his daring escape. “That was pretty cool,” Rainbow admitted. “But I don't buy it.” “You two do have a lot in common,” Rarity needled. Twilight turned red as a cherry tomato. “Whatever,” she muttered. “Let's just watch the episode, please?” “But Tony's heart was changed in more ways than one that day. Upon returning to America, he nullified all weapons development at Stark Industries, and dedicated his life to saving the world.” Wiz paused. “In his own way.” “Yeah, we're not talking, like, just donating to charity, and being kind to your neighbor- Tony became a one-man army of justice. And began creating a new and improved armored suit that the public would eventually dub... Iron Man." The girls clapped appreciatively. Twilight realized she was staring just a bit too hard as Tony hammered away at his giant anvil. Shirtless. She shook her head and tried to pay attention to what Boomstick was saying. “And then he made another one. And another one. And another... another... and then he made like a shitload more!” “What the- how many of them suits could he need?” Applejack wondered. “The Iron Man suits are numerous,” Wiz answered, “But they typically come with a common base-set of tools.” Another list came onscreen, and Twilight quickly began jotting it down. “Generally composed of a gold-titanium alloy, his standard suits have the strength to lift up to 100 tons; fly at supersonic speeds; and come with an on-board intelligence system called JARVIS- which controls his weaponry, and can summon other suits at his beck and call.” Composed of a gold-titanium alloy Adds 5 inches to Tony's height, yet only weighs 25 lbs Capable of high-speed flight, super strength, and enhanced durability Standard Weaponry Repulsor Rays Smart Missiles Anti-tank Missiles Unibeam “Unibeam?” Rainbow read. “What's that?” “I'm sure they'll explain if it's important,” Twilight assessed. Pinkie giggled. “You'll like it...” she sang. “And for good measure, these babies come loaded head-to-toe with weaponry. I'm talkin' shoulder mounted darts, anti-tank missiles, an EMP, and the Iron Man staple: Laser beams!” Boomstick cheerfully listed. He sounded like a filly in a candy store. “I don't think those are lasers,” Twilight pointed out. “A laser is composed of photons, light particles. I doubt one could be powerful enough destroy asteroids.” “But what about when you do magic?” Pinkie pointed out. “That's magic, that's different. The beams are caused by the energies interacting with the particles in the air. Like a neon sign.” “Ooooh. That's neat!” “So what are those- those weapons?” Fluttershy asked. She swallowed, not liking talking about this part. “These 'repulsor blasts',” Wiz explained, “Draw power directly from the reactor in Tony's chest- or chest piece, depending on the time period- to fire high-mass, negatively charged muons as a concussive energy attack.” “Well holy crap,” Twilight's eyes widened. “What?” “They actually have a semi-plausible scientific explanation for something!” She flipped back through her notepad. “Has this ever happened before?” The other ponies laughed and went back to watching the show. “Most commonly, these are fired from the palms of his suit,” Wiz finished. “But if the situation calls for a bit more firepower, he can blast an even larger beam directly from his chest piece. UNI-BEAM!” Iron Man crossed his arms over his chest, then ripped them apart, pushing out a beam of power wider than his whole body. “Whoa.” Rainbow's jaw dropped a couple inches, along with the rest of her body as she forgot to flap. “That was... that was...” “Super-duper-omega-awesomely cool?” Pinkie asked. Rainbow paused. “What you said.” “All these features come standard in his most often used suit, Model 13: The Modular Armor.” “This armor specializes in adaptability, allowing Tony to swap out it's individual pieces for ones suited to the mission at hand. Oh, and it also has an extra casing known as Iron Man Armor Model 14. But you can just call it...Hulkbuster.” The music dropped and the ponies gasped as they saw the enormous secondary armor, which seemed to ooze power. Wiz seemed just as impressed. “As the name implies, this upgrade was built to contend with one of the universe's strongest beings. With the combination of magnetic and hydraulic technology- in addition to the strength of the modular armor- the Hulkbuster can deliver far more powerful punches and hold its ground against The Incredible Hulk. Who is strong enough to lift a 150 billion ton mountain.” Fear crept into the hearts of the six little ponies as they stared at the green giant, who was nearly as big as the armor Tony had built. They watched as it held up under the advanced assault and shuddered. “Land's sakes,” Applejack murmured. “Could y'all imagine somethin' like that getting' loose in Equestria? Ain't no pony strong enough to stand against that.” “Maybe the Elements of Harmony could stop it?” Fluttershy suggested. “Or our Rainbow Power?” Rarity put in. “I'm not sure,” Twilight admitted. “Actually, there's a lot of characters in this show that I'm not sure we could beat.” “D'you think this Hulk feller will ever be on the show?” Boomstick's voice drew them back to the program. “But his most advanced armor yet comes in the form of his Endo-Sym armor. Part metal, part... scary space-alien-parasite, Tony can summon it telepathically; use it to imprison his foes; and even suck up electromagnetic fields. Mmm...electricity. Wiz took over again. “It can take hits from Storm's lighting, and shoot repulsor beams so powerful, they can injure meta-humans who are normally able to absorb energy.” “Although Tony is a mere man who finds himself fighting with and against unimaginably powerful beings, he has proven time and time again that technology can compete with the world's greatest superheroes.” “He can survive blows from Thor's hammer, hold his own against Captain America, and move faster than a an Extremis-enhanced superhuman's eye can track.” Twilight absorbed this information even as she wrote down the third list. Downed She-Hulk with one punch Can hold his own against Captain America in hand-to-hand Can achieve warp speed flight Tanks hits from Mjolnir Strong enough to bend metal girders with his suit's hands Lifts up cars with one hand First human to possess the reality-warping Infinity Gauntlet “ Wait,” she realized, “He can stand up to Thor's hammer? The only other thing we've seen that can do that is Captain America's shield!” “And he can fight Captain America!” Applejack pointed out. “Whoo-doggy, I wonder how'd he'd do against that Batman feller.” “Not to mention,” Boomstick decided to add, “His suit can actually learn and predict its opponents' next move. And withstand the fury of several nuclear bombs! Do not underestimate the Golden Avenger.” “That being said,” Wiz pointed out, “For all their power, the Iron Man suits are hardly flawless.” The ponies chuckled as they saw one of the suits bouncing off the walls and ceiling, unable to fly straight. “They've been know to malfunction in... life threatening ways,” Boomstick said, and they stopped laughing. “And consume too much power too quickly, leaving Tony helpless.” Twilight winced. “That could prove unfortunate in the middle of a battle, like this one.” “Tony frequently pushes his suit and his body to their absolute limits... and past them. And his reckless, head-first mentality is responsible for landing him in trouble just as much as it is for getting him out of it. This has led to him setting off a civil war between superheroes, and pissing off the all-powerful Phoenix Force into killing Charles Xavier.” “What? Charles? But he's the Iron Man,” Boomstick whined. Wiz wasn't finished. “And he once built a device capable of releasing twenty thousand megatons of atomic energy. That's three times more than all of the Earth's known nuclear weapons combined,” he added. Twilight heard this and paled. “And then he just blasted it straight into the ground!” Boomstick cheered. “All because he wanted to see what was at the Earth's core.” “I'm certain there's a better way to do that,” Rarity winced. “Though I'm also certain you would do the same, Boomstick,” she muttered. “It... didn't work out,” Wiz clarified. “But Tony's most diabolical nemesis isn't the Mandarin, or even Ultron. It's his lifelong battle with alcoholism.” “Say what now,” Applejack said flatly. “What's wrong with downin' a glass o' cider once in a while?” “Absolutely nothing!” Pinkie agreed. Rainbow nodded. “Girls!” Rarity interjected. “This is a serious issue- a glass of cider is one thing. But imagine never being able to put the glass down. Imagine how it would effect your family, your loved ones!” “You speakin' from experience, Rare?” asked Applejack while patting Rarity's back. The unicorn sniffed. “I'd... rather not talk about it any more.” There came the sound of a can pop-top from the speakers. “Did you say something?” Boomstick asked. “Oh, that is it!” Rarity shrieked. “You no-good, low-down, dirty-” She launched into a tirade of curses at Boomstick that made even Applejack flinch, and made all the others glad Spike and the CMC weren't there. Onscreen, Tony faced a tank in his Iron Man Armor. The tank launched a shell at him, but Tony merely twisted out of the way. Then he launched a missile of his own- a relatively small one. It impacted the tank with no noticeable damage, and Tony began to walk away. Then the tank exploded. “I know who I'm voting for!” Rainbow cheered. She couldn't imagine someone more awesome than the Iron Man. “Now hold on sugarcube,” Applejack nudged her. “Let's see the competition, first.” ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ The Death Battle logo slammed shut on Iron Man, then opened on... Superman? The ponies' confusion was not eased by the first few lines of narration. “Superman,” Wiz began, “Is among the most powerful characters in all of fiction. He can destroy planets, withstand supernovas, and fly faster than light itself.” “What kind of person could possibly be the arch-nemesis to someone like him?” They all breathed out, remembering now that this fighter was Superman's enemy. Though they had to agree with Boomstick in his assessment. The redneck continued, “You'd have to be like, a god made of magic Kryptonite-” “WRONG!” Lex screamed in the face of a terrified woman. “Ha!” Pinkie chuckled. “Memes.” “Nope,” Wiz agreed. “Just a mortal man with a passion for business, swindling, and green trench-coats: Lex Luthor.” “G-green?” Rarity didn't even have time to summon her fainting couch before she collapsed. Fluttershy absently patted her friend's shoulder, but kept watching. “Alexander Joseph Luthor began his rise to the top- from the very bottom. As a child he lived in a run down section of Metropolis called the 'Suicide Slum'.” Wiz faltered. “Yes, it was that bad. Under abusive parents it was only by sheer willpower that Lex moved on to a better life.” While the others made sympathetic noises over Lex's unfortunate family situation, Twilight focused on writing down his stats. Full name: Alexander Joseph Luthor Height: 6'2'' | 188 cm Weight: 210 lbs | 95 kg IQ: Immeasurable Twilight frowned at that impossibility, but kept writing. Reason for baldness: classified Former President of the United States Once acted as his own son via brain transplant to a new body Twilight once again considered the possibility of brain-transfers to further her research, and once again dismissed it. She wasn't that desperate. Yet. Boomstick didn't care about Twilight's mental battle or her friends' sympathy for young Lex. “Yeah,” he laughed, “Willpower and some good old fashion Social Darwinism. His parents died in a car crash when their car's brakes failed, leaving Lex alone. Don't feel bad for a second! He used their life insurance money to get out of the ghetto and start his own company. And he's the one who rigged their brakes!” Fluttershy gasped. “He- he killed his own parents?” “That ain't right,” Applejack muttered. She looked unsettled. Wiz sounded it, too. “Though founded through some... legally questionable means, the infamous LexCorp successfully spread it's influence throughout all of Metropolis. In time Lex came to practically run the city itself. Taking ownership of nearly every media outlet, Luthor's positive public image went practically unopposed.” “I bet that's how Nightmare Moon stayed in power in her timeline,” Twilight realized. “But everything changed when the Man of Tomorrow showed up.” “In Lex's eyes, Superman was a massive issue for mankind,” Wiz said, sounding very understanding. “If humans no longer had to solve problems themselves, they would surely become a weaker race, completely dependent upon this otherworldly savior.” “So Lex began his crusade to remove him from the equation.” Even Boomstick couldn't muster up much contempt- until he continued: “And then promptly insert himself as the ruler of humanity.” They all rolled their eyes. Of course Lex wouldn't be an actually decent guy. “Lex is a cunning strategist and mechanical genius, who prefers to place his opponents in un-winnable situations,” Wiz lectured. “However, if physical strength is required, he dons the mighty Warsuit.” They watched as a fully-suited Lex dropped to the ground, ready to fight. “Must I remind you of my superiority?” he asked. “The Warsuit is a powerful battle armor created by Superman's other arch-nemesis, the alien god known as Darkseid. And it's been further enhanced by Luthor's own designs.” “Forged in the fiery pits of Apokolips, Lex's Warsuit is no ordinary piece of machinery.” Applejack gasped and Fluttershy covered her eyes as Lex picked up Wonder Woman by her hair. “Despite it's... less than sleek appearance-” Rarity woke up just long enough to see Lex's junk-pile of a suit and fainted again. Boomstick continued: “It comes equipped with force fields; gauntlet blades; a giant Kryptonite ax; and energy blasts powered by Kryptonite generators.” “A lot of his weapons are powered by Kryptonite,” Twilight noted as she wrote down the suit's capabilities. Culmination of technology from Lex, Darkseid, and Brainiac Superhuman strength & durability Flight Force fields can negate heat vision Flamethrowers Energy blade Energy blasts Includes four different Kryptonite energy-generators in each of the suit's fingers “He is usin' it to fight a Kryptonian,” Applejack pointed out. “Yeah, but that means it doesn't have any special abilities against anyone who isn't a Kryptonian,” Pinkie replied. They all stared at her. “What?” “It can also fly,” Wiz announced, bringing them back to the rundown. “And has enough strength and durability to go up against Superman himself.” “Despite how capable the Warsuit is, you may feel it has an obvious weak spot. The giant hole where his head is! But ol' cue-ball's chrome dome is actually protected by an invisible force field.” They could all picture Boomstick rolling his eyes at the ridiculous idea. “He just wants his opponents to know exactly who's beatin' the shit out of 'em.” Lex turned towards the screen. “Hello, sunshine!” he said, then grinned evilly. Twilight shivered. “Lex's weaponry goes beyond an alien metal suit,” Wiz continued. “In addition to his brilliant strategic mind, he has also surrounded the Earth with dozens of satellites bearing his name.” “Their purpose?” Boomstick asked. “A gigantic game of space laser hot potato!” They watched what appeared to be a scene from a video game in which Lex somehow caught the laser beam, forming it into a ball over his head. Rainbow scoffed. “He totally just ripped off the spirit bomb-thing from Goku,” she said. Lex hurled the energy ball at his opponent, a creepy looking clown, and it caused an explosion that could be seen from orbit. In spite of that, the clown got back up again. This got a chuckle out of the ponies about the unrealistic nature of video games. “Being a genius multi-billionaire, it's no surprise Lex's accomplishments match the expectations.” For a moment, Wiz lost his jaunty tone and actually sounded disturbed. “He's equaled Deathstroke in combat, stabbed Supergirl, snapped Brainiac's neck, and defeated Power Girl in a single stroke.” Rarity came around just as Boomstick said, “You can't blame 'im. I don't think anyone could handle more than a single stroke with Power Girl-” “Oh, for the love of-” “However,” Wiz interjected, much to Rarity's relief, “Lex is not solely dependent on his Warsuit. He sometimes subjects himself to a Kryptonite steroid, which has made him much stronger than an ordinary human. Capable of surviving wounds nobody reasonably should.” The grotesque injection and rippling body-horror made all the ponies flinch. “So not worth it,” Rainbow gagged. “Yeah,” Boomstick said, sounding like he was about to crack up, “Like the time when a giant gorilla shot him in the chest with a sniper rifle, knocking him out of a helicopter, off the edge of a cliff, and landing headfirst in a canyon. He was up and banging his robot chick in like a day! Oh, yeah,” Boomstick backed up, “He built a robot version of Lois Lane for... you know, sex and murder.” “Because Lex always wants what he cannot have,” Wiz explained. “I give up,” Rarity sighed. “All males are pigs!” “Not all of them,” Twilight said gently. Perhaps she could finally tell Rarity about- Pinkie turned her head a full one-eighty to glare at Twilight. “Eep! I mean- there has to be an exception, right?” Rarity sighed. “Please dear, if you find him, let me know.” Wiz continued: “And his know-how with robotics goes past insane and into absurd. While confined to a prison cell, he built a talking, flying robot... that reads Moby Dick at such a high frequency... it carved out an escape route through the floor itself. Including perfectly shaped stairs.” Twilight's eye twitched. “That isn't just absurd, it's physically impossible! At least, with the design they're showing...” She immediately began thinking up a design which could do it. “But most diabolical of all,” Boomstick declared, “When no one was looking Lex Luthor took forty cakes. He took 40 cakes Wiz! That's as many as four tens. And that's terrible.” The ponies couldn't help but laugh at the ridiculous children's book being shown. Especially since Boomstick had quoted it word-for-word. ”Strange thing is, that's... actually... officially... canon,” Wiz sighed out in exasperation. There was even a comic panel to prove it. "oh that Monster!" screamed Pinkie Pie as she could barely able to imagine somepony doing something so EVIL! “Bastard!” Boomstick swore. Then he got back to business. “Luthor's hatred of Superman and drive to win are stronger than any machine he can create. Take- for example- the time Superman threw a satellite at Lexcorp tower, bringing the building down on top of poor ol' Lex. This left the guy with half his face ripped off, all four limbs blasted away, and he was impaled in five different places.” “Oh... my... Celestia,” Twilight whispered. She had never seen injuries so horrific, not even in the previous Death Battles. Usually, the combatants or their victims died, right away. They didn't have to suffer through the pain. Off to the side, Fluttershy actually flew into the bathroom, where the sound of vomiting could be heard. Rainbow glanced around. “I'm... gonna go help Fluttershy,” the pegasus said nervously. Then she was gone, too. Boomstick wasn't finished though. “Even like that, he still refused Superman's help. Wiz, if that ever happens to me, do me a solid and...kill yourself in front of me so my dream of outliving you is complete.” Rarity would've been angry about Boomstick ruining such a potentially heartwarming moment, except for the images of Lex undergoing surgery kept her distracted. It was simply awful to look at. She glanced over, noticed the absence of the pegasi, and saw that Pinkie in particular looked upset. The party pony's mane was beginning to flatten. Rarity eased sideways and placed a hoof around Pinkie's neck. She smiled gratefully. “Never gonna happen,” Wiz informed his friend, before continuing with the narrative. “But it's also that same cocky independence that serves as Lex's greatest downfall. When he merged with the Zone Child-” “Whoa!” Boomstick reeled along with girls. “I-it's not what you think,” Wiz said quickly. “He gained, and I quote, 'infinite power'.” “And a secure spot on somebody's watch list.” “Oh, Boomstick,” Rarity sniffed. “I hate you, so, so much.” “The only catch was, he could not use his power to harm others. But because all he wanted to do was kill Superman, he... tried it anyway.” “So Superman just straight up punched the god out of him,” Boomstick laughed. “Well, that's hardly accurate...” “C'mon. How else would you describe that?” "he has a good point" Said Twilight agreeing with Boomstick. Wiz hesitated. “Fair enough,” he decided. “Even so, when the Earth is threatened, you can count on Lex Luthor to look his enemies in the eye and fight for his people.” Wiz paused. “And then exploit the hell out of them afterward.” Onscreen, Lex walked into a pit and up to a purple- thing. “You know what happens when you take on Lex Luthor?” he asked. He brought up a pistol and emptied the clip into the poor creature. When it was empty, he threw the gun at it and began kicking it mercilessly. “The same thing... that's going to happen... to Superman!” Lex continued to beat and kick the creature, now long past the point of overkill. The ponies were quite thankful when the logo slammed shut. “Alright, the combatants are set. Let's end this debate once and for all!” “But first, we don't want you to have horrible, earth-shattering regret by missing the best party in gaming. So we're gonna tell you about it!” Twilight muted the TV while the advertisement played. “Well,” she said, slightly faint. “That was... something.” “Is it over?” Fluttershy called from the bathroom. “Come on out, girls,” Applejack called. Rainbow and Fluttershy came out slowly. “I um, I'm going to vote for Iron Man,” Fluttershy said. “Yeah,” Rainbow agreed. “Me, too.” Twilight sighed. “Me as well. And not for the reasons you think!” she snapped at Rainbow. “Sure...” the pegasus giggled. “Oh man, finally! I get to tease somepony else for a change!” “Ugh,” Twilight groaned. “Okay, is there anypony who wants to vote for the bad guy? Speak now, or forever hold your peace.” Slowly, hesitantly, Applejack raised a hoof. They all stared at her. “Ah'm sorry, ah'm sorry!” she said. “But ah just gotta. Ah know he's a horrible person, but he's got a point about Superman. Ah mean, it'd be like if Princess Celestia went around solvin' everypony's problems herself, stickin' her muzzle where it don't belong.” “But isn't that what we do?” Fluttershy pointed out. “No!” Applejack shook her head. “We help them solve their own problems. We don't solve the problems for 'em! Why, if Celestia did what Superman did, she'd be one step away from bein' a tyrant bad as Sombra or Chrysalis.” “It's alright, Applejack,” Twilight said. “We might not understand, but we can respect your choice. It's just a show, after all.” “Yeah,” Rainbow nudged her. “It's not like this show will change the fate of Equestria or anything.” ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ with Celestia ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ In her bed chamber in Canterlot, Princess Celestia nuzzled her godly colt-friend. “I've missed you,” she whispered. “Sooth,” he said. “I am most grateful for the contest which hast brought us together again.” “I just wish we could all be together,” Celestia sighed. “We should talk to Sunset.” The stallion shrugged. “In good time. I think thou should perhaps focus on thy kingdom first. Would it not be prudent to take a more active role in affairs?” “I'll take an active role in our affair,” she teased. “Oh ho!” he laughed. “I accept thy challenge. But I was serious,” he motioned towards the window with one hoof. “Thou art a natural leader; thou should be amongst the people of thy land, leading them in glorious interaction with the other nations.” Celestia pinned him down. “We're going to interact first,” she breathed into his ear. “Then we can talk about other nations...” ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ “Okay,” Twilight said back in her castle. “So it's five of us for Iron Man, Applejack for Lex?” They all nodded. “Right then. Let's see how it turns out.” She un-muted the Battle just as it started. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ The warehouse was large, but quite full. Military vehicles and other, stranger things were packed so tight there was barely enough room for the security guards to patrol. That made it easy for a stealthy individual to slip inside. He waited for the guard to walk past, hearing the man's radio squawk. “Colonel Rhodes copies all,” it said. The target was at the center of the building, with an extra guard: a large crate labeled 'Stark Industries'. With only one aisle left to go, his confidence and impatience won out. Lex Luthor stepped behind the first guard and took him out with a taser gun. The second guard heard the noise of the discharge and turned around, bringing his rifle to bear. He got off a few shots, but Lex's personal force field deflected them easily. He took the second guard out as well, and the screen cut to black. They all winced, and a collective “Ooooh” escaped the ponies. The screen faded in on Tony Stark's workshop, where he was working on yet another suit of armor. While also listening to the theme song from one of his many TV series. His hubris did not go unnoticed. “If I had my own theme song, I'd totally listen to it,” Rainbow bragged. “On repeat.” However, Tony wasn't left alone for very long. There was a beep, and a computerized voice spoke. “Sir, we have a visitor,”JARVIS said. The alarm went off a moment later, and the monitors around the workshop displayed Lex's face. Tony stood up, then looked over at a glass case. Inside was a greenish-colored crystal. “Kryptonite?” Pinkie asked. “Dunno,” Twilight admitted. Back in the warehouse, Lex reached his target and got to one knee. “All clear,” he muttered. He opened the case, revealing- “Are those the Dragonballs!” Applejack exclaimed. “How in the hay does Iron Man have the Dragonballs?” Nopony could think of a satisfying answer for that. But Lex ignored the balls, as well as a large key-shaped relic, in favor of a crystal stuffed into the side of the crate. “What a joke,” he laughed, though they weren't sure what he was referring to. Lex stood up, taking the crystal. At that moment Iron Man flew into the warehouse, his entrance accompanied by a long, vibrating guitar. “Hands off, Baldy!” Tony declared. He strutted forward. “What's that you got there?” Lex turned around, crystal in hand. “Oh yeah!” Tony fired off a repulsor blast, obliterating the crystal. “It's mine. I'll send you the bill.” Lex pulled out a remote control, and his Warsuit dropped from... somewhere. As he got into it, JARVIS felt the need to speak up. “Actually, sir,” he said, “I should probably remind you: the contents of this warehouse belong to Miss Potts.” “Pepper?” Tony winced. “I'll forward the estimated damages fee to her account.” “Great. Be discreet about it.” “One of us has to be.” Lex laughed giddily, then launched himself through the air a few feet. He came down opposite Tony in the center of the warehouse. His shield flared to life. “Remember my face, Stark,” he said. “It'll be the last thing you ever see.” FIGHT! The music picked up, and the two armored men launched themselves at one another, meeting in the middle with energy already building around their fists. Lex's energy increased faster, shoving Tony back several meters. “So... Awesome!” Rainbow squeed. The others couldn't help agreeing. Tony fired repulsor blast after repulsor blast, but Lex's shield absorbed them all. He switched tactics and activated the missile packs built into his shoulder blades. The dozens of miniature warheads spiraled outward, turning the floor around Lex into a raging conflagration. But the man himself was unaffected; he blocked any rocket that came near with an energy projection from one arm. Many of the missiles, however, did not come near him. They flew out into the rest of the warehouse and detonated against the stored items. Many cars turned into flaming wrecks. “His system's are confusing my targeting,” JARVIS admitted. “Also, adding two million to your charges.” The ponies laughed at the AI's snark. “Not now, JARVIS,” Tony snapped. “What do we got here?” He flew up and forwards, slamming a fist into Lex's armor. But he simply bounced backward several feet. “I'm having trouble determining the suit's alloy. Alien, perhaps.” Tony tried again, rushing forward at ground level and slamming his fist into the plating between Lex's legs. Twilight winced, recalling a time she accidentally kneed human Flash Sentry in the same spot while they were dancing. But the blow had no effect on Lex. Angry now, Tony began punching Lex's torso repeatedly. All the while, his foe simply stood there and laughed. “My suit... is invincible!” Tony launched himself into the air and brought both repulsors down to Lex's face. “How 'bout this part?” he said. Tony let off both blasts, the explosion filling the area with smoke. “Nope,” Applejack said, “It's just as tough as the rest of 'im!” Before the smoke even cleared, Lex reached out and grabbed Tony's leg. He swung the Iron Man into the ground once, twice. Then he hauled Tony up and crushed the shin of his armor with one hand. “And I thought you were smart,” Lex shook his head. “Hey, you're the one who looks like a giant rusty trash can with legs,” Tony quipped. “No judging!” Lex snarled and smashed Stark into the ground again, then turned and hurled him into the leg of the Gundam robot. Broken conductors in the robot created feedback, and the leg exploded; the rest of the robot collapsed, taking out a row of artifacts. “Sir, I estimate that will be a five hundred and eighty three million dollar fee.” “Whoa whoa!” Tony cut JARVIS off. “That one's on him.” The ponies laughed again, loving the running gag. Fluttershy perked up. “You better win, then,” she said to the TV, “Or good luck getting your money back!” The ponies who hadn't played buckball with her looked sideways in surprise. The music kicked back into high gear as Lex brought out his Kryptonite ax. He rushed forward and slashed through Iron Man's defenses. “Ah ha ha ha!” Lex laughed. He charged up a Kryptonite laser and gave it a wide sweep, obliterating half the remaining warehouse stock. Tony deployed a limited shield, which was all that saved him from being cut in half as well. It didn't keep him from being knocked back, though. He stumbled on his feet, then spotted a possible weapon behind him. “Here we go...” He muttered. “Activate the EMP!” JARVIS dutifully charged it up and unleashed the electromagnetic pulse. Instantly, all the improperly shielded systems in the warehouse shut down or were damaged. Even Lex's suit. “Ug- what!” Lex fell to one knee. “Impossible!” While Lex was distracted, Tony picked up what he'd spotted earlier. “All right,” he laughed. “Come to mama!” Giving it an extra boost with his back thrusters, he tossed it at Lex. “Heave ho!” “Wait a minute,” Rarity said. “Isn't that-” At the same time, Lex regained control over his suit and stood up, just in time to see the black car hurtling towards his face. “Wait, is that the-” That was all he had time to say before he was forced to chop the vehicle in half with his ax. The two halves flew behind him and decimated yet more treasures. “That one might actually put a dent in your wallet,” JARVIS said. “Uh huh!” the ponies agreed. “What are you talking about, it's just a car,” Tony rolled his eyes. JARVIS brought up a price list for all the uniquely themed items that car contained. “Seriously?” Tony was aghast. “What kind of car was that? Where do I get one of those?” “An' why in tarnation did this Miss Potts have it?” Applejack wondered. “I think there are more pressing concerns, AJ,” Twilight pointed out. Though she, too, was curious about how Pepper Potts had come to own the Batmobile. Lex hefted a giant crate over his head, labeled 'Model 14'. “Wake up, sunshine!” he called out, right before he hurled it at Tony. “Watch your left,” JARVIS advised. A split second before the crate plowed into Tony. The crate smashed Tony through the wall of the warehouse and into the street, coming to rest directly on top of him. The music faded out, and Lex flew through the opening. He took his ax out again as he landed. “Thanks for the fun, Stark,” he said. “It was... smashing.” “It ain't over yet, you bowling pin!” Rainbow growled. Sure enough, a large fist punched through the box, and the large form of the Hulkbuster leaped out. It crashed back to the ground, making a crater in the street. “No problem, pal. Thanks for the suit.” The secondary helmet came down, and the background music soared into an electric beat. Iron Man and Lex charged forward once more, but this time Tony struck the first blow. He grabbed the blade of Luthor's ax as it swung towards him, then shattered it. Stunned, Lex tossed the now-useless shaft aside and brought up his fists. The two metal titans traded blows that shook the earth, almost equal. Until Lex charged his fist, and knocked the Hulkbuster back a step. Tony recovered quickly, and plowed forward into Lex. He tackled the other scientist into a building, then activated his jets and pushed them up the side. Brick and concrete slammed into Lex's head, and for a brief moment Lex skipped away from the building. Tony slammed him back down and kept pushing until they reached the top. Tony let Luthor fall a bit, then fired a repulsor directly into his chest. “Whoo!” Rainbow cheered. “Kick his butt!” “Rrr,” Applejack growled. “Come on, you lyin' sack of manure, get up an' fight!” Lex fell through an overpass and plowed a trench through the street. Tony flew down after him. They charged for a third time, and locked arms, energy flying between them. Lex laughed as the energy built up, until it once more knocked Tony back. “That current damaged your battery,” JARVIS warned. “Power is at fifteen percent and dropping fast. I recommend a new plan of attack.” “Uh oh. 'They've been known to consume energy too fast'...” Twilight recalled. Tony shrugged off the advice and the blow. “I have a plan,” he snarled, even as Lex powered his force field back up. “Attack!” Tony ran forward and pounded on Lex's shield, doing nothing. His opponent laughed at the feeble attempts. “Power is at ten percent,” JARVIS announced. “You call that power?” Lex smirked. Tony charged his repulsors and grabbed hold of the shield, but it didn't work. “Ha! You are nothing.” Desperately, Tony asked, “JARVIS, re-route all power to the arm and leg hydraulics!” “Will that be enough?” Fluttershy wondered. She was starting to have a hard time breathing. “There's only six percent power!” Pinkie pointed out. “Six percent!” Tony began a rapid fire beating of Lex's shield, giving it everything. The shield flickered, but remained, the quintessential immovable object. “I have seen true power,” Lex gloated. “You are nothing more than another ant to crush under my-” Tony brought his fists together, charged the repulsors, and slammed them both down onto the shield. To everyone's surprise, it shattered out of existence. “Well how about that,” Lex said dully. Tony drew back for one last punch. “Good night, cue-ball!” The music suddenly faltered as Lex caught the Hulkbuster's fist. “What's happening?” Tony cried. “We're out of power,”JARVIS reported. “Aw, figures,” Tony moaned. His suit began to collapse towards the sidewalk, literally kneeling before Lex. “Fool,” Lex shook his head. “You're just like all the rest.” He opened a touch-screen on his suit's arm and tapped away. “Building a suit to save the world... Trying to play God...” Target Locked, the screen read. High above the battle, a small satellite orbiting the Earth rotated. Red energy built up, until it lanced downward. Lex raised his arms and used the energy manipulators within his suit's hands to capture the laser. The energy balled up, and drew Lex into the sky as well. Rubble floated up in a halo of destruction, even as the music swelled. “LET ME TELL YOU SOMETHING STARK!” Lex roared. “THERE'S ONLY ONE MAN IN THE WORLD FIT TO PLAY SUCH A ROLE!” He grunted as he hurled the massive energy ball at the Hulkbuster; it transformed into a sky-high column of fire that obliterated most of the street. What was left of the armor, Tony inside, was launched into a building several blocks down, which shattered and collapsed on top of him. Lex gently landed on the road, looking smug. “Me,” he finished among the silence. Everypony stared at the television in awe. For just a moment, they believed it was over, and Lex had won. Then the music restarted. Drums and stringed instruments rose up, even as streams of metal danced through the air around Lex. He looked around, confused, and the metal flew into the pile of rubble down the street. Chills ran up and down the backs of all six ponies. Under the rubble, a new suit was forming. A single repulsor cleared away all of the debris that had been on top of it, even the remains of the Hulkbuster. “I dunno, Lex,” Tony said. His voice was quiet, but confident. And angry. “Being a god can't be too hard, I mean- I'm the most intelligent-capable person on the planet.” Tony strutted forward, fully encased inside his Endo-Sym Armor. The silver suit gleamed under the sun, and radiated power. Glowing blue lines flowed over its surface. “I'm not playing god,” Tony grinned. “All this time-” He crouched down, and the lines in his suit shifted from blue to red. “I've been playing human.” The suit powered up with a rumble that shook the ground, even as the music transformed into a pure one-woman wail. Tony launched himself forward faster than Lex could react. He smashed into the arm guard, which splintered, and Lex was sent flying. Tony flew after him, reaching the apex before Lex did, and knocked him twice more. Lex fired off a ball of Kryptonite energy, which slammed directly into Tony. But Tony wasn't affected in the slightest. He flew forward; Luthor desperately unleashed his flamethrowers, but Tony danced around the fire until he was right in front of his opponent. “I'll take this!” He grabbed the arm's of Lex's suit. There was a quick whining energy buildup, and then Lex's suit seemed to collapse. He was knocked backward in the air, still hovering, but he could not move. “Wha- what... did you take?” Lex demanded. Tony held up one hand, and green Kryptonite energy danced along it. “Everything,” he hissed. In a single blow, he cleaved apart the top half of the Warsuit and pulled Lex out. The devastated machine fell to the ground far below. Tony wasn't finished- he turned and hurled Lex himself toward the ground, smashing him through another overpass first. Lex bounced down the road, but Tony was there in an instant. He tossed Lex back into the air, then jumped after him. “Here's the big one!” Tony crossed his arms over his chest, then arched his back and unleashed the unibeam. All of Lex's power was turned back against him, and the man fell apart under the assault. Literally. His body disintegrated at a sub-cellular level. Unfortunately, the energy beam didn't stop at Luthor's body. Tony dropped back to the ground and his armor changed from red to blue, and he stared at what was left of a building. He winced. “That... was Pepper's building, wasn't it?” With horrible timing, a ringtone chimed in his suit. “Phone call from Miss Potts,” JARVIS announced. “Uh- tell her... I'm not here. I'm, uh... jogging!” “Already answered, sir.” “Tony?” a curious female voice filtered through the speaker. “Uh, hi, Pepper. How are you?” She got straight to business. “Why did JARVIS just deposit five billion dollars for-” Tony jumped as a piece of the Gundam fell to the ground behind him. “-Collateral damage?” “I'm- not here,” Tony said unconvincingly. He launched himself into the air and flew away. “I'm jogging.” KO! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ For a moment, they simply sat and stared at the screen. Then six ponies started cheering so loudly, it was heard all over Ponyville. “That. Was. AWESOME!” Rainbow shouted. “You're tellin' me!” Applejack didn't even care that she'd lost. Seeing what she'd just seen was worth it. “Ah've never seen anythin' could top that in my whole entire life. An' that's the truth!” “Twilight, your wings-” Rarity tried to say, but the alicorn wasn't listening. “He won, he won!” she sang while bouncing around like a school-filly, wings pointing straight up. “Yay!” Fluttershy said, even as Pinkie Pie shot off a party cannon quartet, which somehow sounded like the music that played when Iron Man first arrived in the warehouse. “Did you see that? First he was all like, sheeeewm! And then he was all like, whooosh! And then-” “He won, he won!” “Yay!” “He won, he won!” “-And the fire! It just exploded-” “Yay!” “He won, he-” “EVERYPONY QUIET!” Rarity shrieked. They all stopped- Pinkie Pie in midair- and looked at her. “Ahem,” she pointed at the television. “It isn't quite over yet...” “Oh, right.” They all sat down, barely containing their giddiness, and watched. “Bullseye!” Boomstick proclaimed, even as Iron Man pulled out a two-dimension cannon bigger than himself, and used it to annihilate what was left of the Warsuit. “Both Tony and Lex possessed incredible pieces of technology, but only one was naturally prepared for anything,” Wiz explained. “Although it's true that Lex could trade blows with Superman in his Warsuit, the only reason he ever lasted as long as he did is because many of its weapons are based on Kryptonite. Great for battling Kryptonians, only... okay against everybody else.” “That's what I was talking about!” Pinkie protested. “Yes, the Warsuit could take hits from Superman, making it more than a match for even the Hulkbuster's power. But even against the very enemy it was designed to kill, the Warsuit only lasts so long.” The took in the comic image, which showed Supe's literally punching Lex out of the Warsuit. “Guess he was the one who was, 'wrong',” Fluttershy said. “Iron Man's greatest advantage was being able to adapt his strategy by remotely summoning and changing suits. The Endo-Sym in particular could counter nearly anything Lex could throw at it.” “Plus Iron Man has far more actual combat experience. Lex treated physical combat as a last resort, beneath him, while Tony straight up enjoys it.” Boomstick paused, and they waited for the inevitable bad joke. “Lex just wasn't suited for this battle.” “The winner is Iron Man.” The ponies cheered for their new hero, even as the logo slammed the episode closed. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ “Next time on Death Battle,” Boomstick intoned. The ponies quieted once more, to see who would fight next. Text appeared onscreen. 'SHUNNED BY SOCIETY', it read. The watched as a man underwent a painful looking transformation, his hands gaining claws, his teeth turning to fangs, his skin sprouting blue fur, and his muscles bulging. He lunged at the ordinary looking humans, who screamed as he roared. 'BEASTS BY NATURE'. Lightning flashed, while a statue cracked apart to reveal a bat-winged humanoid. The ponies flinched, reminded of Discord. This must be a villain, they assumed. Until the next text came up. 'DEFENDERS OF HUMANITY'. A quick montage showed the two beings fighting even worse monsters, saving people, and... doing science? Twilight was intrigued. 'BEAST vs GOLIATH', the screen flashed, with the headings 'X-MEN' and 'GARGOYLES'. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ “That looks pretty cool,” Rainbow said, but she sounded subdued. They all had a hard time imagining a more epic fight than the one they just watched. “Ah'd have to watch 'em back to back, but I dare say that one was even better than the Superman-Goku fight,” Applejack ventured. “I agree!” Flash faded back into existence, causing the ponies to jump. “Aw, what's the matter? Scared of me?” “No!” Rainbow declared. “Y-yes!” Fluttershy whimpered. “That's sweet,” he said. “But I believe it's about this time that you normally get presents?” “Oh yeah!” Rainbow flew down next to the glowing box. As soon as it faded, she opened up the flaps and looked inside. “What'd we get?” Applejack asked. Rainbow dug around inside. “Huh,” she sounded disappointed. “What?” “It's just some comics and action figures,” she said, and pulled them out to demonstrate. “Even less than usual.” Rainbow set the loot on the floor. “Next time we see Deadman, we might want to tell him the box is broke.” “It isn't broke. Those are for Spike! You know, when he finally decides to show up.” Flash smiled. “Wait...” Twilight glanced around and frowned. “Where is Spike?” “I sent him and Starlight on a little trip...” answered Flash. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Meanwhile, in the Crystal Empire...~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ “Back! Back you foul beasts!” Spike mashed the controls of the video game. “Hey, thanks for letting us play, Sunburst.” The stallion shrugged. “It appeared just a minute before you two did. I certainly have no use for it. I'm not even sure how it works!” “I'm really sorry about all this,” Starlight told him. “I have a feeling it's the fault of our mutual friend-” “The princess?” Sunburst asked. “No, Deadman.” Starlight grit her teeth. “I just hope he doesn't strand us in the wilderness again.” “Well, if you're worried, by all means. Stay as long as you like.” “And what about the rest of us?” Rarity asked. Flash scratched at his chin. “I'm getting to it.” “Could you get to it a little faster?” Rainbow crossed her hooves. She wanted her prizes, already. “Psssh,” Flash waved her off. “You're no fun.” He snapped his fingers, and a box immediately appeared in front of each pony. “Go ahead, open 'em.” Fluttershy was the first to peel back the wrapping and reach into her box. Her hoof touched something... odd. “Eep!” She squeaked. Fluttershy dropped the box and shot into the air. Tentatively, a golden pseudopod reached out of the box and settled onto the couch. It formed into a blob about the size of a pony's head. “What is that?” Twilight frowned. “It's an Endo-Sym!” Flash said proudly. “Don't worry- without an AI or the internet, this little guy is hardly smarter than a dog.” “Are we talkin' like mah puppy Winona or like the Diamond Dogs?” “What's the difference?” “Winona's smarter,” Applejack grinned. Fluttershy settled back onto the couch and leaned towards the blob. “Um... hello,” she said. The blob glowed blue, and rubbed its top-most portion against Fluttershy's nose. She giggled. “I think I'll call you... Aurum.” Aurum flashed bright white, then wrapped around Fluttershy's foreleg. It seemed to purr.The others quickly pulled the boxes open. “Sweet!” Rainbow pulled out a small metal pack, which she slung onto her back. It unfolded to cover the front of her wings. Then, the rear section lit up with a repulsor's glow. In an instant, Rainbow was zooming around the castle, without any effort at all. “This- Is- Awesome!” Pinkie hugged her new party cannon; like Rainbow's pack, it glowed with repulsor power. Rarity cooed over a miniature Iron Man robot. It bowed to her, and proceeded to re-tie her ribbons. Twilight looked at a glass box with a glowing circle inside it. Around the circle's edge were the words, 'PROOF THAT TONY STARK HAS A HEART'. Her eyes were about the size of dinner plates, her smile bigger yet. Only Applejack held off. “What's the matter, Applejack?” Flash asked. “Ah don't know,” she murmured. “What if... what if ah don't like it?” Flash laughed. “I picked it out special. If you don't like it, you can use it on me.” "Us it on ya'?” Applejack frowned. Slowly, she removed the top from the box and reached inside. She rummaged around a bit, frowned, then pulled out a metal shaft. She hit a button on the side, and a curved, green blade erupted out. “'S Kryptonite,” she said. “Mmm-hmm.” Flash leaned down closer. “Check out the handle.” She peered at the metal, and saw that there were words carved in it. “To... Applejack...” she read. “'Sometimes even when you're right, you're wrong. Ah hope ya' can find the balance between actin' on the truth and keepin' your principles, the way ah never could. Be better than me. Alexander J. Luthor.'” Applejack looked up at Flash. “Ah bet that's the nicest thing he's ever said to anypony.” “To any pony, yes.” Flash stretched. “But you give him far too little credit. Lex did a lot of good in his life. It's just that the bad ended up outweighing the good. And he knows it. Actually, he's been trying to be better recently. “Really.” “Very recently. After this battle was made.” “Huh. Well, thank ya', Mister Notion. This was fun.” “Yeah. Maybe we can do it again some day! But for now... adios.” Flash turned sideways and disappeared, like a piece of paper. “I've got to go, too,” Fluttershy said. “I need to introduce Aurum to the rest of my animals.” “Yes!” Twilight looked up from her Arc Reactor. “In fact, we should all go. Goodbye!” A bit put off, but used to their friend's strange antics, the ponies exited the Castle of Friendship and returned to their lives, albeit laden with new treasures. Fluttershy flew low over Ponyville. Aurum was wrapped tightly around her hoof, and didn't seem to be coming off if it didn't want to. The golden blob rippled in the wind. Fluttershy was so busy thinking about what was going to happen when she got home, she didn't pay attention to her surroundings. She ended up over the Everfree Forest. She only realized this when she heard the hiss of a monster. Fluttershy halted in the air and looked down at the dark forest. “Oh dear,” she whispered. Slowly, she started drifting backwards. Only to bump into something large, cold, and scaly. Fluttershy turned around and saw four long necks, with reptilian heads attached to each. The hydra stared at her for a moment, then roared. “EEEEEEEEK!” Fluttershy cried. The hydra lunged for her, and she was done for-Clang! Fluttershy opened her eyes and saw a very different view. Partially obstructed by gold, and tinged with blue around the edges. But why hadn't the hydra eaten her? She looked over herself and saw that her body was sheathed in blue-glowing gold. “Rrrrr-um!” she heard. “Oh!” Fluttershy realized. “Aurum! You're an armor-pet.” It hummed. Fluttershy looked up and saw the hydra watching her. One of its heads was nursing broken teeth. “I'm sorry about your teeth,” Fluttershy said, “But you shouldn't eat ponies!” The hydra hissed. “Don't be like that.” She tried using her Stare, but with the armor on, it didn't work. The hydra lunged again. This time, she brought up her hoof and pointed it at the hydra. “Last chance,” Fluttershy said. “Go. Home!” It didn't. Fluttershy concentrated, and a blast of energy exploded from her hoof and splashed against the hydra. It didn't really injure the beast, but it no doubt stung. The hydra yelled and dropped back below the trees. Fluttershy smiled and looked at her hooves. “Yay!” she said softly. “Let's go home, Aurum.” “Rrrrrr-um.” Fluttershy started to flap her wings, then had a thought. She extended her legs out behind her, and concentrated on the energy again. Flares erupted from her hooves, and she rocketed forward, faster than ever before. “YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY!” Flash smiled as he watched Fluttershy speed home. “Well that was fun!” “I'M GLAD YOU ENJOYED IT,” Deadman said. He was still strung up, but the acid was gone and the hole in his false-guts repaired. “BECAUSE YOU'RE NEVER DOING IT AGAIN.” “What? But I thought I did a good job!” “THAT'S JUST IT. YOU DID A GREAT JOB!” Flash was confused. “So then, what's the problem? “THE PROBLEM IS YOU'RE MAKING ME LOOK BAD. JETPACKS AND HELPER ROBOTS? AND I CAN'T TAKE THOSE BACK!” “Oh! I'm sorry,” Flash apologized. “I never meant to screw things up.” He sighed. “But I always do, somehow.” “He's messing with you, kid.” Alpha slapped him on the back, which nearly broke it. “You did fine. And if you ever want to come back, we can have Harmony gag Deadman again.” “I'm going to ask her to do it anyway,” Trepp smirked into his book. Flash smiled. “Well, thanks for the offer. I'll leave it open. But... I'm over this now. I got my own universes to fool around with. Ciao!” He snapped his fingers, and the business suit collapsed. There was nothing inside. “Is he actually gone?” Harmony asked. They waited a moment, and Alpha grunted. “I think so.” “Oh, thank us,” Trepp sighed. “He almost makes me appreciate Deadman.” “THANK YOU!” “I take it back.” “THEN, FUCK YOU! BUT SERIOUSLY,” Deadman chuckled, “LET'S GET BACK TO BUSINESS AS USUAL, OKAY? HEY, FOLKS!” he yelled at the fourth wall, “WHAT'D YOU THINK OF THE NEWBIE? SHOULD WE KEEP HIM? LET HIM GO? RUN HIM OVER WITH A TRUCK? LEAVE IT IN THE COMMENTS!” “Deadman!” Harmony snapped. “Stop breaking the fourth wall so blatantly! You'll wreck the suspension of disbelief.” “NEVER! BESIDES, HAVE YOU READ THE TITLE OF THE STORY? IT REQUIRES SUSPENDING THE SUSPENSION! I WON'T STOP, AND THERE'S NO WAY YOU CAN-” Another asteroid wedged its way down his throat, muffling his voice. “Thank you, Harmony” Trepp said. Harmony shook her head. “It wasn't me.” They both looked over at Alpha, surprised. He said nothing, just kept polishing his sword. And smiling. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ CHAPTER END! SEE YA ALL WHEN I GET GAARA AND TOPH READY!
