Game of Circumstances

Chapter fourteen: Cultism

‘’ Hap’?! Sirius?!’’ I shouted, surprised. ‘’ What on Earth are you doing here?’’

Hap’ seemed totally despaired, crying and all, her hair flat and straightened, while Sirius, who had his blouse a little creased, tried to comfort her. He leaned his head to face me and he made a bothered wince. You bet that he could.

After all, they were inside a cell.

‘’ Um… Do… do you k-know these… ponies?’’ The shy pony asked.

‘’ Yeah, they’re acquaintances.’’ I replied, without even bothering to face her to answer. ‘’ Now, Sirius, explain me how the fuck you got yourself and Hap’ arrested?’’

He scratched the back of his head. I sighed and rolled my eyes in desperation. Suddenly, a strange noise came from behind me. I turned.

A half-pony looked at me from his wheelchair. No, seriously! He lacked his two hind legs and the major part of his back.

He was wearing a red armor that matched perfectly his red coat, and looked like a stallion. He had also an electric blue mane cut short. He smiled as the filly hugged him. I figured that it must be her uncle.

‘’ Autumn Rain!’’ He said, hugging her back.

‘’ Uncle!’’ the foresaid filly said. She finished hugging him, and placed her on his left side.

‘’ Who are you?’’ He asked, looking at me. ‘’ How did you passed the guards?’’ I figured that he spoke about the guards at the entrance.

‘’ Uncle!’’ Autumn said. ‘’ Be kind with her! She’s the one who saved me!’’

‘’ ‘saved’ you?’’ He sighed. ‘’ Autumn, I thought I had said that the market days were dangerous for defenseless mares like you are. But if you saved her, I think I can thank you.’’

‘’ Oh, It’s nothing.’’ I answered. ‘’ Just, could you explain me how these two ended locked up here?’’ I asked, showing Hap’ and Sirius with a hoof.

‘’ These two?’’ He patted his chin with a hoof. ‘’ Poisoning, I think.’’

Poisoning?!

I facehoofed, guessing how this had happened. I faced Sirius, who was wearing a weak smile and still scratching his neck.

‘’ Seriously…?’’ I deadpanned. ‘’ I thought I had said something about cooking, Hap’.’’ The despaired pony looked at her hooves. I turned again. Blood Rain was totally laughing, while Autumn Rain looked at me quizzically.

‘’ This is rich!’’ The captain laughed. ‘’Anyway, I was bringing good news. These two, I assume that they’re your friends, are free to go, given that the poor victim has woken up from his cupcake-induced coma.’’ On that, he nodded, and a guard, coming out from nowhere, opened the cell’s door.

My two companions got out, Hap’ gaining her curly mane again as she passed the door. I had only the time to sigh before she buries me under more cream-colored pony.

I made my way out, ignoring the snickers and chuckles of quite anypony in the room except Hap’ and Sirius. I combed my mane quickly, and got out.

Nopony spoke as we left the basement and came back to the streets.

‘’ What flavor?’’ I finally asked, surprising everypony and breaking the silence.

‘’ What?’’ Sirius replied, frowning.

‘’ I asked: what flavor?’’ I repeated. There were several minutes of silence.

‘’ Stone.’’ Sirius finally answered.  ‘’ She was making stone-cupcakes. ‘’

You know, when I told you that Hap’ lacked a bit the cooking skills to make something good? I forgot to add that she tend to use everything that is in her sight.

‘’ But how…?’’ I started.

‘’ I don’t know.’’ He said. ‘’I arrived when the pony she forced to taste it turned green and died on place. Hm. Well, he seemed dead. Looks like he isn’t.’’ I let go off a chuckle. Hap’, seeming untouched by the fact that she had nearly killed somepony, bounced happily –as she usually do- around us.

‘’ Where are we going?’’ She asked. I looked at my watch. Quarter past twelve. Eh, looks like it is lunch time.

‘’ Hmm.’’ Sirius, who had looked on his watch too, paused to think. ‘’ Why don’t we…’’

I never knew what we were going to do, because somepony interrupted him.

‘’ Hey, Doc! Callixus! And … uh, the bouncing one!’’ We turned to face the newcomer. Although we were in a street. It was an Ash Ranger, wearing a metallic helmet that covered his entire head, with two big yellow lenses glowing slightly. He was also wearing the usual duster that wears every one of them –I’d learn later that the grade is differenced by how shaped is the duster and the armor that they’re wearing underneath.-, and carrying what seemed to be a sniper rifle.

He caught up with us and stopped to remove his helmet. He was blood red-colored with a brown mane. I recognized him as one of Raveus’s buddies.

‘’ Caporal Bloody Sword. I serve under the Sgt. Raveus’s order. We met before you arrived at Hellhole. About that, I think the high command would like a report on this Inn, because we never had the luck to meet somepony that had stayed there.’’

Of course you didn’t! This thing is filled with fuckin’ cannibals!

I wanted to scream, but I contained my inner rage. Killing an Ash Ranger would not help my relation with them.

‘’ Well, about that…’’ I said. ‘’ … it’s a long story, and we haven’t got the time to eat yet, so…’’

‘’ No problem!’’ He shouted. Gosh, must be a habit for him to cut people in the middle of their sentences. ‘’ We have got a good cook at our place. I’m sure he won’t mind you to eat with us while you tell us that story.’’ He put back his helmet on his head. ‘’ Hey, c’mon, follow me.’’ He added with a now metallic voice, before starting to walk.

I looked at Sirius, who shrugged, and followed the ranger. I sighed, and followed the group, Hap’ still bouncing happily around me and Sirius while humming a song.

Celestia… Please… tell me you installed a switch on/off on this pony…

Thirty minutes later, we reached a door on the left side of Happiness. This door was protected by Ash Rangers, this time. Without any questions, they opened the door to Bloody Sword and us.

‘’ Here we are!’’ Sword shouted.  ‘’ I gather the squad and we’ll go eat something.’’ I nodded, and he let us alone.

‘’ Well, this was unplanned.’’ Sirius said. I nodded again, and my stomach grumbled.

‘’ Where’s Hap’?’’ I asked, frowning. Suddenly, my sight was obscured by the party pony, which suddenly spawned in front of me. ‘’ Yaaahh!’’ I yelled, falling on my back. ‘’ Please…’’ I put a hoof on my chest, sensing my heart beating at an alarming rate. ‘’ Don’t try to give me a heart attack, Hap’. I’m way too young to die like that.’’

Sirius snickered as he helped me to get back on my hooves.

The entire ranger squad came to find my frowned, Hap’ being Hap’, and Sirius laughing at me.

‘’ … Are we interrupting something?’’ Raveus –I recognized his voice despite the helmet- asked. Behind him were his five teammates, all wearing the same helmet.

‘’ No, no…’’ Sirius stifled between two laughs. I punched him on the left shoulder. ‘’ Ouch! What was that for?’’ I sighed.

Yeah, I sighed often, with these two.

‘’ Nothing.’’ I answered, withering him. And then, facing the rangers. ‘’ I heard that you had a good cook here?’’ Raveus nodded, and then led us all to the mess.

We sat up at a table. The rangers removed their helmets, putting it on the table.

‘’ Kitchen Knife! ‘’ Raveus yelled, getting the attention of a ranger wearing an apron. ‘’ Eight portions here!’’ The cook – I guessed it was him- nodded and then got back to his kitchen.

I was sitting on a side of the table, next to Raveus and in front of a mare that I identified as Sapphire. She smiled at me. I smiled back.

The cook came quickly, disposing a dish filled with a kind of… soup, I guess, in front of each pony at the table, with a bottle of water. I stared at my… maybe it was porridge, finally. It seemed to stare back.

What the hell is that greyish thing?

To be honest, it looked like damp plaster. I gulped. How is something looking like that even supposed to be edible? I poked the dish to see if it was solidified, but no.

I heard a chuckle and turned my head to Sapphire.

‘’ You know, ‘’ she said, guessing what I was thinking. ‘’ This is edible, or we’d all been sick like dogs since we arrived at the camp, and Knife would have been dismissed.’’ I decided to trust her, and gave the… thing a quick lick.

Damn it, this horror is good!

I dug my muzzle in the dish, putting a hoof at each side and eating all. I dropped the emptied dish on the table and licked my lips. All the rangers burst into laughing at my strange behavior.

‘’ You’re really a funny one, are you.’’ Broken Jewels observed.

We stayed for an hour or so, telling each other stories, laughing about stupid facts, until Raveus slam the table, shushing everypony.

‘’ Well.’’ He said. ‘’What about Hellhole? I have still to report on that to the High Commander.’’ I and Sirius winced, and Hap’ hid under the table. ‘’ Was it that bad?’’

‘’ Well…’’ I started, scratching my neck. ‘’ …cannibals.’’

‘’ Ah.’’ He said. ‘’ Now, that will be a problem that I’ll have to clear when we’ll get back to our posts. Good bye, I have a report to give.’’

Each of the rangers retired themselves after, apologizing for being such a bad host, till we were only three at the

table, with Hap’ still hiding under the table.

‘’ Hm.’’ Sirius observed. ‘’ Guess that we can head to the tavern now.’’ I looked at my watch and nodded.

In fact, it was already four in the ‘afternoon’. We got on our four hooves, with Hap’ still looking totally frightened who followed us while shooting worried glance at everypony that passed too close of her. This pony is random.

We got back to the tavern one hour later, because I’m slow, and I managed to get us lost for thirty minutes in that maze.

‘’ Pffew!’’ Sirius sighed, finally pushing the tavern’s door. ‘’ It’s the last time I let you guide us, Cal.’’ I rolled my eyes.

‘’ Oh, C’mon, we arrived there, no?’’ I replied.

‘’ Yeah, after I decided to ask somepony where the tavern was.’’

‘’ Hm. I put my bag in the room, and I’m back here.’’ I said. I quickly made it to the room, where I launched my bag on my couch, and I returned to my friends, who had sat up around the same table as yesterday.

We ordered our apple ciders -of course, actual apple cider for Hap’-. Not having that much things to tell, I let Sirius deal with Hap’, who was visibly annoying him about random subjects, and glanced through the bar. I took a sip of my cider.

Eventually, Gibbs showed up and began to play. I don’t like him, but he surely knows how to play the guitar. I smiled and took another sip of my cider.

I wasn’t really hungry, so I figured that I would eat later. I relaxed myself on the wooden chair, and…

The door slammed open, and several ponies entered. Two of them seemed to be town guards, and the others were cloaked. All of them had their face hidden behind a helmet or a mask.

Everypony hushed instantly, apart Hap’ and Gibbs who was still playing.

I stared at the newcomers. They seemed armed.

One of the two that were guards approached the barman, who glared at him as he did so.

‘’ Give us eight whiskey, you bitch.’’ He said. The barman withered him, but he poured them their whiskeys and gave them.

Apart Gibbs, everypony was silent.

‘’ You, the idiot with a guitar, shut it, okay?’’ Gibbs snickered and continued to play. ‘’ Are you listening, you freak?’’

Celestia, why did I put my weapons in our room…?

‘’ HEY!’’ The guard shouted. ‘’ LISTEN TO ME!’’ Gibbs stopped playing. ‘’ Aah… Glad to see that you’re reasonable…’’

‘’ And why do I have to stop?’’ Gibbs asked suddenly.

‘’ Why? You ask me WHY?!’’ If Gibbs’s objective was to piss off that bastard, then he had succeeded. The foresaid bastard approached him. ‘’ You don’t ask, you do!’’ Gibbs smiled, and then put the guitar on the ground. He tipped softly on his fedora, and punched simply the guard in the face.

I know where this is going…

I sighed and got up. Sirius and Hap’ too, of course. The guard got up too, his muzzle bleeding.

‘’ What? Yo-you dare…’’ Gibbs punched him again. This time, the guard stayed on the ground.

K.O

‘’ What do you want, you three?’’ One of the cloaked ponies asked as I reached the bar, next to him.

‘’ Oh, nothing…’’ I said. ‘’ Just a little cleaning up.’’ I suddenly took him by the neck, reaching it through the cloak, and slammed his head against the counter several times, before throwing him on the ground.

I dodged a hoof aiming at my jaw, and turned just to see my attacker being hoof wrestled by Hap’, that is still awesome when things get to fighting. She totally surpassed him, and then jumped in the air. She slowed herself, and suddenly accelerated to put him a hind leg’s hoof in the face, sending him crash in the bottle reserve.

Never understood how she managed to slow her jump. Sirius was still using his medic’s skills to hit his opponent in all the sensible points. He knocked him in the parts before punching him in the face.

Four down, four to go!

I was sent flying as a pony that I didn’t saw coming punched me on the jaw. I got up, rubbing my hurt jaw, and spitted blood. It was the second guard. He rushed at me, and I just couldn’t resist my desire to use my favorite technique. I threw me on the ground and punched him with both hind hooves, even if the armor slowed it down; he was sent flying too, and landed on a table. He didn’t move after. I tackled another of these morons, who fell on the ground and just had the time to roll on his back before Hap’ jumped on his belly, knocking him unconscious.

Gibbs smashed a bottle on another of the cloaked ponies. I put an elbow in another’s stomach, and Sirius took him by the mane just the time I needed to aim an uppercut at him. The cloaked pony flew briefly, before hitting one of the walls and then the ground.

Pfffew…. t’was the last one…

The bar’s staff was looking at the mess we had caused with a horrified look. The waitress fainted. I made an awkward smile.

I saw then the first guard that Gibbs had punched trying to get out of the tavern without being spotted.

‘’ Hey, you!’’ I shouted. He froze in place, and Hap’ literally teleported, closing the door in in face. He fell on his back again. I reached him, and put a hoof on his chest, preventing him from fleeing. ‘’ Who are you?’’

‘’ As i-if I would say it to you, bitch.’’ He coughed, spitting blood.

‘’ What about ‘you say it or I repaint your armor’?’’ I asked. He laughed.

‘’ You don’t need to know me, bitch.’’ He paused. ‘’ the Discord’s cult here in Happiness do not forget ponies like you, who thinks they can stop us. Ha! You will die all, and these idiots Ash Rangers my ass will be defeated as well. Two days! Two days, and this town will be dedicated entirely to Discords, His opponents slaved.’’

‘’ You insane bitch.’’ I muttered, before punching him one last time in the face. I sighed. ‘’ Sorry for the mess.’’

The barman nodded, having heard the cultist as well. Gibbs put a little bag of bits –always wondered how the fuck he had all these bits- on the counter, and we all retired us to our room.

I reached my couch, and for the first time till one week, I slept like a rock.