To Greener Pastures

This cannot be happening.

A god damn letter coming out of nowhere and it's having a conversation with you.

And just like your mother, it is berating you for the terrible vocabulary curses you had developed over the years.

They should meet George Carlin, given the situation that guy can swear like a sailor... Oh, wait.

"Are you gonna sit there with the look of shock on your face all day? Or am I going to have to meet you in person?" The letter was glowing, erasing the top sentence and rewriting it to that.

Of course, Ashton's belief was thrown out the window. How can he NOT be shocked?

He however had to talk to this letter more, maybe it's aliens finally communicating with our race and he was the true ambassador...

Or maybe from Hogwarts school of witchcraft and wizardry! That shit is always got magic up the wazoo.

Or... Just maybe.

"Who exactly are you? How are you able to communicate with me like this?" Answered Ashton with a new look of curiosity sporting across his face as he stared at the letter.

Every single word in the letter gets erased and is replaced by one sentence. "Stand clear from the letter, I will introduce myself properly."

Ashton was a little taken back by that but then felt saw the letter go absolutely crazy, he gets up quickly and backs off from the letter, scared that this could actually be it.

He was going to die and it was going to be an explosion from a god damn piece of paper.

Oh well, he had a semi-nice life. He always wanted to go out with a bang.

He saw the letter visibly brighten like crazy and covered his eyes with his arms as he continues to back himself up to the point his back was now touching the wall.

And after a few seconds the letter calms down and the brightness dulls to a normal contrast.

"Phew! What a ride!" Said a voice coming from in front of him.

Ashton took his arms away and squints his eyes at the direction of the voice and what he saw made his eyes widen in sheer disbelief.

"No way..." Ashton stutters as he saw an amalgamation of different animals, a chimera if you will. But it was not anything like the chimeras in any other fiction or lore books there was.

Discord, THE God of chaos and disharmony was standing right in front of him, rubbing one of his ... Talons? With a piece of cloth, cleaning it no doubt.

After cleaning his claw or talon or whatever, Discord finally looked over at the awe-struck boy and grins a knowing grin. "Ah, you must be the wayward soul of misfortune! The pleasure is all mine!"

Ashton pointed a finger at Discord shakingly. "Y-y-y-you're Discord... f-from My --" He couldn't finish that sentence, how the hell could he? A character from a child's cartoon is right there in front of him.

A cartoon that has never been on the boy's radar for more than 3 episodes and a few fan art here and there, but after searching up on the wikia available, he read up on the villains of MLP.

In short, he was in it for the sake of the ride.

Discord with a grin bowed and conjured up a gentleman's top hat out of thin air. "The very SAME! Ho ho, my reputation has exceeded more than I thought!"

He then looks around the room with that same cartoonish smile on his face and seemed to be examining the environment around him. "Y'know, your parents are very interesting pon-- Err, PEOPLE..." He lightly chuckles. "Forgive me, I've been around ponies for SO long, the language just catches up on you." He then looks at Ashton with that same fucking grin.

"But you seem to know that quite well. Don't you, m'boy?" He raises his eyebrows and expects an answer.

Ashton had to give him some kind of answer. "W-well, not exactly..."

"Oh, don't play dumb with me. You know I am a heh... 'FICTIONAL' character from a 'FICTIONAL' show, but as you can see, I am over stepping the fictional boundaries JUST a tad." He said while coming up towards the boy.

Ashton quickly wanted to take a step back, but he had forgotten that his back was up on the wall and quickly got into position. "S-Stay back!"

Discord laughed. "Or what? Those things you call hands will even hurt... MOI?" He chuckles more. "Oh my dear boy, you are so adorable. You see, I'm a GOD of chaos. You cannot touch me, even if you had the upper-" He snickers. "Hand..."

Ashton wasn't laughing. "Y-you're a villain, you can't fool me with this chaos nonsense! I'll die before I--" And then his mouth forms a zipper and Discord had zipped his mouth with magic.

"Ah, that's better." Discord said before looking at the bed and tsks a bit. "Really, you could have cleaned up after yourself." He said to the boy who was now trying to remove the zipper from his mouth, but it didn't seem to budge.

Now all the empty cartons were in the garbage and the plates were in the sink, Discord took a glass and poured some of the Coca Cola into the glass and took a sip. "Oh my, this is delectable. You humans may be chaotic, but you sure make a good carbonate beverage... Not as good as Chocolate Milk, but I guess this is better than nothing."

Ashton was getting pissed and looking at Discord with rage.

Discord then grins. "Now that your mouth is shut, perhaps I have your attention." He sets the glass down. "I'm going to give you an opportunity that you will NOT pass. And no, I'm not trying to trick you."

"In fact, I want to HELP you."

With those words, Ashton stopped in his tracks and looked at Discord with scrutiny.

Discord swipes a finger into the air and erase the zipper from Ashton's mouth so he may speak. "Calmed down?"

Ashton nodded. "S-so, why do you want to help me? A villain?"

"Oh come on now, I'm REFORMED! In fact, I am simply helping someone who is in desperate need of escape!" He looks around. "I mean, you said it yourself. This place is 'SHIT' as I recall."

This made Ashton's eyes widen even more, he was in complete shock. "Y-you were spying on me!?"

Discord chuckles. "Since the day you were born, my boy..."

"WH--?!" He was about to view his shock until Discord busted a gut laughing.

"Oh my, you sure get riled up easily. That was what we call in the industry, a JOKE, my dear boy." He said which made Ashton visibly relieved.

"Yes, I was spying on you for a whole month. I don't know why, but this certain location is like a GATEWAY to Equestria, not a portal per-se. For a whole month I have heard you talk to your parents, see you sulking and crying on the floor, see you jump for joy with your 'shitty' new job and now? To finally meet with ME." He said putting a talon or claw or whatever on his chest like he was filled with pride.

"Cool, so you know who I am then." Ashton said while trying to still keep his sense of reality in check. "Wait, by now the manager would come in screaming... What did you do?!"

"Me?! Oh come now, I haven't done a thing to that wife abusing piece of garbage... But I wish I did..." He looked a little serious for a sec and then smiled knowing. "...Take a look outside that door for me." He said softly and puts his talons behind his back and closed his eyes.

Ashton gulps and looked at the door that would lead to the hallway, he puts a hand on the doorknob and at first touch, it was ice cold. "Wh-.." He puts his ear to the door and heard wind, he shook his head and opened it to reveal that he was in a snowy forest. "Wh-what the hell!?" He quickly closed the door and looked at Discord with sheer disbelief. "How the hell did you do that?!"

Discord chuckled and folds his arms. "Well, I would keep a secret but this is just too fun... So I'll spell it out for you, bucko. You honestly think I was the one who teleported from my world to YOURS?" He said with a barely stifling smile.

"Noooo..." Ashton started connecting the dots and opened the door once more, rubbing his eyes. "... YOU TELEPORTED MY ENTIRE APARTMENT ROOM TO THE EVERFREE FOREST?!" He shouts out loud.

Discord grins and begins walking out, the snow scrunching underneath his hoof and talon. "Come out, the winter's fine." He chuckles.

Ashton started chuckling out of sheer insanity. "Th-this can't be happening, I'm in Equestria. This isn't correct! THIS DOES NOT COMPUTE!!!" He shouts out loud once more and puts his hands over his spiked hair and bangs.

The now smug acting Discord wandered back in like it was nothing and wandered to the microwave and started pressing random buttons. "With working appliances and electricity!" He then points at the light bulb that was on the entire time.

Ashton didn't even think of that. "...How...?"

Discord had an evil grin and walks up to Ashton, his face really close to his and he just whispers in his ear. "...Magic."

Confused was NOT the term used here, the correct term to describe Ashton's current emotion is: Bamboozled as all FUCK.

And then Discord picked up on that. "In about an hour, the royal guards will be knocking on your door. Well, 50 minutes seeing as though I took up 10 minutes of your time... But it's enough time for me to explain to you something. And a FAVOUR if you would be so kind."

Ashton looked at Discord, still a little distressed but he was all ears now. "Wh-what do you want?"

This made the draconequus smile. "In due time, first I want to explain what you're going to get yourself into... Ahem, this is the world of Equestria, the leading species of this land is none other than PONIES. There are two co-rulers, a one Princess Celestia Sunbringer."

He gets up close to Ashton and whispers. "I call her Tia, but don't tell her I said that." He chuckled and continued.

"And then we have the second co-ruler. Princess Luna Moonbringer... But trust me, they're biologically related." He chuckles once more. "These two will be questioning you and will no doubt find something rather incriminating. But I don't doubt for a second you can weasel your way out of it."

"W-weasel?" Ashton questioned.

"Spare me the feelings." He said with a bit of annoyance and then clicks his fingers as a surplus of things appeared on the bed. "These are things that can get you more in touch with Equestria and some necessities to keep you on track."

"Any questions?" He asks the boy to which he nods.

Ashton sighed a bit and scratches the back of his head. "Why me?"

Discord gives a grin and looks closes his eyes. "An easy question... I want YOU to become some what my HEIR."

Ashton blinks. "Excuse me? Your heir?"

The draconequus nodded twice. "That's correct, my HEIR." He puts his paw and talon on each shoulder of the boy and smiled. "I want you to become the NEXT GOD OF CHAOS!"

Ashton was taken back by this. "Eeeh?! B-but how the hell do I qualify?! And even then, I'm too kind to be some kind of God of Chaos!"

Discord chuckled. "Okay, maybe not God of Chaos... but perhaps someone who can ADAPT with chaos magic... Perhaps an underling, but not zealously... Oh, what's the word."

"Erm... Heritage?" Ashton said randomly, picking a random word from out of his ass.

"Heritage! That is the one." Discord smiled. "I want to pass on my knowledge of magic and other little dubious tricks... And you are the perfect subordinate!"

Ashton didn't like this, but he had to ask. "...This won't take over my body, or anything restrictive like that?"

"Oh, heavens no! I'm not that sadistic to strip a pony-- err, person their freedom. Think of it as a GIFT! A wonderful boisterous gift! You can use it as you see fit! Succeed me in being the ruler of Equestria with NO one to stop you... OR... Be a superhero! Eh, it's up to you." He said the last line pretty casually considering.

"So, interested?" He made a grin that looked honestly appealing.

Ashton couldn't help but nod. "Okay, I'll take you up on that offer."

Discord starts to giddily jump around. "Oh, what a wonderful day! You will not regret it, as you'll no longer be defenceless in such new territory such as Equestria." He then got up and puts on a suit and gentleman's hat from out of nowhere. "I'm sure I'll see you again soon, my boy."

At this, he puts his talons in a finger snapping position. "I can't wait to see how you progress..." He clicks his fingers and Ashton felt his body shut down.

And all went completely black.

{Chapter 2 - END}