Just Winging It

Wiggle! Twitch! Sniff!

The strange individual lay in a crumpled heap in the middle of a grassy windswept meadow. He yawned as the cold air blew through his fur, "Two more minutes, Mommy..." whispered.

After two minutes, he started to stir. He yawned and stretched, making his joints pop before he finally noticed that his bed had been replaced by grass. He opened his eyes then he looked around, "Huh... There's something different." He looked down at himself, his shaggy dark gray fur, the black swanhead tattoo on his chest, before realizing he was naked. He breathed a sigh of relief, "Well, that's the same."

The big gray bat pulled himself up onto his feet only to stumble over himself and into a nearby tree. He shook his head, "Ugh... no more Nyquiskey shots before bed..." He felt something coming back up, "BLAAAARGH!"

After graciously painting the tree and grass with whatever it was he'd eaten last night, the bat groaned, "Man... who'd I blow last night?" He remembered, "Oh right, me." He massaged his temples with his wrists before opening his bright red eyes once again to survey his surroundings, "Huh... Now I know I remember goin' to bed in my little loft..." He smacked his head, "Come on, ya had pizza, then ya mixed Nyquil and Jack." He scratched his chin, "Went to sleep in your cushy red quilts, woke up in cold grass in the middle of nowhere." He nodded dumbly, "Ah..." He stood there as the wind swept between his legs, lightly jostling his weighty pair down below before he finally said something else, "Welp, that's enough of enjoyin' the scenery, where do I go from here?"

He looked down, "And where's my pants?"

Unbeknownst to him, the tall, lanky bat had himself a peeping tom, or in this case, a peeping mare.

A cyan-coated pegasus had chosen herself the most comfiest cloud within miles to catch herself a quick siesta when she had suddenly heard the voice from below. She righted herself in a flash then looked down towards the ground. She had no idea what she was looking at. Well it looked like one of those bats that live over by Sweet Apple Acres, but he was much bigger, and she was pretty sure none of them could talk.

She giggled when she saw him throw up all over that tree. She dragged this cloud lower so she could listen in. This strange bat guy was talking to himself, and sounded a bit like Applejack now that she could hear him more clearly. And what was Nyquil? Whoever this guy was, he seemed harmless. She leaped off of her cloud then flew down until she was hovering just behind him.

The bat's ears wiggled as he quickly detected the sound of wings flapping. He straightened up.

"Hey!" The pegasus spoke to him.

The bat jumped at the voice. He turned and... "Okay... what?" Floating right in front of him was a blue winged horse thing.

Rainbow giggled, "Boy, you've got a weird face."

The bat felt his face subconsciously before he fired back with a properly cocked eyebrow, "Well thanks, I made it myself."

Rainbow got right up in his face, "What are you anyway? I mean, you look like some kinda bat, but you're like bigger than a normal one."

The bat was getting to be annoyed by this flying horse, "Well yes, I am a bat, thank you for noticin' and you're like some kind of horse, right?"

Rainbow snickered, "Horse? Please! I'm a pony! A pegasus! The name's Rainbow Dash!"

Okay, maybe not so annoying, he thought, "Rainbow Dash... cute name. Did you get that off a cereal box or somethin'?"

She continued to flap her wings, "Uh no, I was called Rainbow Dash by my parents, duh."

The bat heard her, "Ah... well I'm sure they must be proud of you... Um, I'm gonna just go now." He started to walk away.

Rainbow Dash called out, "Wait!" She zipped right past him before she got in his way, "You can't go that way!"

The bat nearly flinched when she put her front hooves on his bare chest, "What? Why not?"

She pointed at the creepy forest just behind them, "That's the Everfree Forest! There's all kinds of weird creepy monsters that live there, it's very dangerous."

The bat chuckled, "Danger? Ha! I'm Jimmy Lee Darrell! As pure-blooded Texan as you'll ever see! I laugh in the face of danger!" He struck a manly pose and gave a cheesy laugh.

Just then something growled as it jumped out of the brush to tackle the cocky bat to the ground.

Dash panicked, "Timberwolf!"

The gray bat found himself pinned by the said timberwolf. He stared up into its glowing eyes as the thing growled, "A wolf made out twigs
and branches? Am I in Japan?" He winced when he felt the creature's hind paw press against a certain area, "Hey, you're on my nuts!"

The timberwolf was about to bite down on him when a heavy rock smacked it in its face, snapping the twigs holding its face together. The thing whined in pain then growled with venom when turning its eyes on Rainbow.

The brave pegasus threw another rock at him, "You leave him alone!"

That one bounced off its hide as the creature charged after her.

Rainbow took flight to get out of harm's way.

Jimmy found his opportunity. He reached out then grabbed the timberwolf's wooden tail, "Whoa there, wolfie! Ya ain't leavin' this party ya just started!" With a crazed look in his bright red eyes, Jimmy yanked on the wolf's tail throwing the beast against a large boulder.

The creature yelped in pain as its body snapped in half. Its hindquarters fell apart as whatever strange magic compelled the beast dissipated. Its front half still survived.

Jimmy looked down at the thing as it whimpered, "Yeah... I didn't think I'd ever make a tree cry, but there's a first time for anything I guess..." He turned to leave the thing to lick its wounds.

Rainbow swooped down on the big bat, "Dude! That was awesome! I have never seen anypony take out a timberwolf by themselves, not even Applejack!"

Once again, Jimmy found himself pinned under an attacker, though this one was distinctly cuter than the timberwolf. He grinned at her praises, "Well, I am kind of a badass. Some kinda livin' tree wolf, I've dealt with weirder shit than that." The bat only noticed how this cute blue pony was currently situated right over his body, which he suddenly remembered had no clothing. He wasn't the type to be bashful but,
"Um, do ya mind movin' back a bit?"

Rainbow did so, stepping back with a raised eyebrow, "Uh yeah sure, why?"

Jimmy sat up in the grass, "Well, if you haven't noticed, I'm kinda naked right now." He gestured to himself with his strange hands with their elongated fingers forming his wing membrane.

The cyan pegasus looked at his crotch then back up at him, "Yeah? I'm kinda naked all the time."

The bat snickered, "Yeah, and you wear it well, but it's normally, you know, rude to just let other people see your dick."

She rolled her pretty magenta eyes like that was obvious, "Well yeah, that's why we normally keep our tails down around here. I mean, it's cool if a colt wants ta look but I'm not that kinda mare."

The bat nodded, "Yeah well, I'm a bat so I don't have that luxury of bein' able to use my tail, since mine is kinda built into my membrane. I mean, I could walk around with mah wings coverin' me, but that would just look awkward. You uh, you know a place I could get somethin' to cover myself up?"

Rainbow smiled, "Oh yeah, one of my friends, Rarity! She's all about fashion! I'm sure she could whip something up for you!"

"Alright! That sounds like a plan!" Jimmy stood up, inadvertently putting his junk right in Rainbow's face.

The pegasus blushed as she saw it so close up, "Whoa..."

Jimmy quickly realized the little conundrum and promptly covered himself with his wings, "Yeah, that's Little Jimmy... uh this friend of yours lives in a secluded place far from the public eye right?"

Rainbow shook her head while she rubbed the sweat off her brow, "Um no... she... her shop is in Ponyville, right where other ponies could see... Little Jimmy."

The bat rolled his eyes, "Well then, we need somethin' to cover me up so I don't end up scarring any innocent children's impressionable imaginations now don't we?"

Rainbow wracked her brain before she got an idea, "I've got it!" She zipped away, flying right into the Everfree Forest she had just warned Jimmy about, "I'll be right back!"

So Jimmy stood there, dick out, wings over his crotch, waiting for his new talking pony friend to fly back. No more Nyquiskeys...

...

Somewhere deep within the Everfree, a white and black-striped zebra was working hard in her hut before her alert hearing told her of a coming visitor. "Ah, a visitor to see Zecora on this fine day, I must meet them and hear what they have to say." so she put aside her morning cleanup then stepped outside to be greeted by a typically frantic Rainbow Dash.

Rainbow greeted Zecora in her way, "Hey Zecora! Uh, you remember the other day you were showing me those special cloths that some of your zebra stallions sometimes wear?"

The zebra seemed happy that Dash had suddenly shown such interest in her culture, "Why yes, this I remember, like a flickering ember, I-"

Rainbow interrupted her, "Z... no offense but I kinda don't have time for the rhymes so... you think I could borrow one of those cloth things?"

Zecora seemed miffed at being interrupted but she took it in stride, "Okay, fine... why do you need one of my loincloths?"

Rainbow quickly explained to her about the strange bat-person she'd just met and how he needed something to cover himself up.

The zebra had listened closely, "Ah yes, I could loan you one of my loincloths for the sake of this bat's modesty. I would like to meet him, though. He sounds like a fascinating individual."

Rainbow agreed there, "Yeah, he is pretty interesting. We were already going to Ponyville to get help from Rarity but yeah, I'll be sure to bring him around sometime. Thanks for the help, Z!" She took the offered cloth from Zecora, "I'll see ya later, Z!" then she zipped off back to where she left Jimmy.

...

Jimmy had gotten bored while waiting and so sat down in the grass. All of a sudden, his ears perked up as he detected something hurtling towards him.

"Look out below!" A gray pegasus cried out before she crashed right into him.

So for the third time in a very short succession, Jimmy found himself pinned. The bat's eyes rolled from disorientation, "Ugh... now I know what a rug feels like." He looked at the dazed pegasus currently on his body, her rear dangerously close to his privates. He tried to ignore this until he felt her yellow tail brush against him, "Damn..."

Right then was when Rainbow came back. She saw Jimmy on the ground with Derpy, "Oh no, Derpy!"

Jimmy pushed the dizzy pegasus off of his body, "I knew I was a babe magnet, but seriously..."

Rainbow snickered, "Your, uh, thing's pointing up."

The bat promptly covered himself, "Yeah, that generally happens when there's a warm body lying on top of me. You got those covers?"

Dash dropped the loincloth in his lap, "Yup! I borrowed this from Zecora. She's a zebra that lives in the Everfree; she's about the only good thing about that place, really."

Jimmy picked up the cloth, "Wow, thanks..." He pulled himself up then tied the loincloth around his waist. It was a tad tight for his hips, but it fit him well. He still had a visible tent in the front, but that would go down eventually. "Mmm, it's a little drafty, but it'll work." Next he pointed to the mare lying in the grass, "Now what do we do about her?"

Rainbow had to tear her eyes away from his crotch again. With his height, her head came up exactly to his waist which put her at eye-level with his privates. She shook her head before she spoke, "Oh, Derpy'll be fine. She's a tough flier like me. So... we should probably start heading for Ponyville. You got wings, you think you could fly with me? It's so cool to have a flying buddy."

Jimmy looked at his wings, "Eh, these things are more a vestigial feature than actually functional. Plus, I've always preferred walking, it's good for the circulation, but... yeah a travel buddy sounds nice."

Rainbow frowned a little when he shot down flying, but she was happy again when he said he'd still want her as a travel buddy. She didn't know why this made her so happy, but it did. She hugged him, "Awesome! Thank you!" She broke away from him then she flew ahead of him, "Come on, Ponyville's this way!"

The bat followed her, keeping up a good jog and enjoying the breeze. He kept up a witty banter with her along the way, "So I noticed ya kinda kept lookin' at Little Jimmy."

The cyan pegasus scratched her rainbow mane, "Aw come on, when ya've got it right out there like that, how can anypony not look?"

The bat snickered, "Ya kinda like me, huh?"

She blushed, "Okay, yes! I do think you're funny with the way you talk an' stuff, plus the way you took out that timberwolf was pretty awesome." She suddenly jabbed him with a hoof, "But that stays between us! The girls would never let me live it down, especially
Pinkie! That pony's such a pervert!"

Jimmy snickered, "Hey, your secret's safe with me, Rainy. Can I call you Rainy?"

She blinked, "Yeah, I guess that sounds cool; just don't call me Brainy, that's Twilight." She giggled before she flew off ahead of him.

So the two new friends were on their way to Ponyville.