Overcoming The Past

I continued what I was going to say.

"Well, I would have still been much younger than the other students younger than the other kids in college, except it would have been even worse because college students are older; I would have still stuck out like Genghis Khan would in a geometry class. Plus I imagine the discrimination against me would have gotten even worse. I don't know. Maybe the students in college would be more mature, but I just wanted to get out of the system after being abused for so many years. But perhaps what scared me the most was–". I froze as I carefully considered my words.

"What would I do after I graduate? I mean, even if I stayed in college for all six years, I would graduate at fifteen, and with child labor laws, I don't think I could have gotten a job anywhere."

Suddenly my eyes opened wide as I realized something.

"Wow... I spent all of my childhood working to make everyone else happy; my parents, my brother, my teachers, …I never gave myself permission to just be a kid. I never had any friends because I was too busy trying to impress my superiors." I buried my face in my arms and cried.

Rainbow was confused.

"Twilight, I… I don't understand. I thought you enjoyed being in school, around more understanding people."

It took me a minute to respond as I tried to choke my tears. I am a total mess. I am a total loser awkward mess with no friends. I have always been that way. But someone has called on me to speak. I don't have time to throw a pity party.

"I…*sniff*. I like learning. I like books and maths and English and everything else. But it would have been nice if I could have just been a kid. It would have been nice to have friends. Kids shouldn't be in college; they should be able to still have fun and not stress about being an adult because kids are not adults. Kids are kids..."

Pinkie jumped up and hugged me.

"Aww, Twily... I hate that you had such a rotten childhood..." Then she raised my head up. I was pouring tears. "But look at you now! You aren't alone anymore! You have friends! You have me, and Maud, and Rainbow Dash," Pinkie pointed at our company, "and then Fluttershy and Applejack and Sunset and everyone else!" Rainbow Dash and Maud Pie joined in the hug.

I hated myself for throwing my private little pity party, but continuing that behavior would have just continued my pity party, which would have continued my awful mood, which would have continued me feeling terrible and probably have lessened everyone's opinion of me and... So I stopped. I sucked in my tears and wiped my eyes. I looked at Pinkie and smiled.

"Thank you so so much, Pinkie... Thank you Maud! Thank you Rainbow! You guys are amazing friends! So much more than I..."

I was absolutely beaming by now. Emotions are funny things. One moment I am bawling my eyes out and the next I am smiling bigger than I have ever smiled before. We all just hugged for several minutes, then we split and returned to our seats. Rainbow was the first to break the silence.

"So uh, if you were such a miserable child, why did you stay? Why didn't you just tell your parents that you'd rather not be there anymore?"

"You mean I should have dropped out?" I responded.

She shook her head and said, "No. I mean couldn't you have gone back to the earlier years you talked about? You didn't have to take college classes if you didn't want to."

"I suppose I could have just said no, but my parents wouldn't have liked that."

Pinkie budged in this time.

"How would you know?"

There was a long silence in the room as I didn't answer. So quiet, the wind outside could be heard blowing against the house. Then, I instantly started up again.

"Going to college always seemed like what they intended for me. They were always so happy about my excellence and praised me on a daily basis. To tell them I did not want to do all the move-ups would only hurt them and disappoint them. I could never upset my parents. I want to be a ball of sunshine for them."

My smile was long gone by this point. I don't know how I looked, but I know my emotions were running at light speed by this point, so I doubt I was readable. Maud entered the conversation.

"Twilight, hey. It's ok. Really it is. Hey. Look at me."

I did as she instructed with the widest, saddest frown I think I had given that night. She said something that finally got through to me:

"Your parents would never be disappointed in you; they love you very much. They were happy because they were proud of you, not because they wanted you to do it. Your parents want what's best for you, not them. If you don't want to be in college, just tell them. I'm sure they will understand."

I wiped away the tears on my face and shrunk my frown some for her, choking my voice again.

"You… y-you really… Do you really think so?"

"Of course I do." She replied once more. "Every parent wants what is best for their child. I'm not one to talk but I feel as that's what they would do. We don't push anything on each other if we don't feel comfortable with it; we just support each other is all. That's what your parents were doing. They were supporting you, not encouraging you."

Pinkie inserted,

"I agree with Maud. If you would rather be a normal child than a prodigy then go ahead. Don't make yourself do something you aren't comfortable with just because of what others think."

She got up off the couch and walked towards us.

Maud came up from behind.

"I- no, we are proud of you no matter what." Maud says, then adds on "Is what your parents would say."

Rainbow Dash looked back outside one of the windows to see how much daylight was left. There wasn't much, and she looked concerned about how safe I would be walking home. She chuckles a little.

"What's so funny?" I said, almost snappily.

"Ah, nothing, heh." RD replied with a smile. "It's gonna be dark soon. You should probably head home.”

I nodded in agreement, feeling I might have overstayed my welcome and caused them enough despair. I was lifted and encouraged by their words though. I felt confident. I was going to talk to my parents tonight. I grabbed my homework and walked towards the door.

"Oh, wait!" I stopped, "Please excuse me. I forgot to clean and return my silverware." I took a step toward the kitchen, but Rainbow grabbed my shoulder.

"I'll take care of it, Twi!." Rainbow Dash announced loudly. "But promise me you'll tell your parents about this whole deal. They'll understand, trust me."

I smiled. I was a little nervous, but I knew everything would turn out okay.

"I promise." I said almost in a whisper before more loudly announcing, “I promise, Rainbow! I will talk to my parents tonight!

"Great! See ya later!!" Pinkie shouted as she waved.

"Bye!" Rainbow Dash yelled.

Maud said nothing but I knew she would say the same thing. I left Sugarcube Corner and walked home. My mind was running at a thousand kilometers a minute, but I knew I could do this. My heart was filled with confidence.