As his conscience had predicted, James took a little over two hours before he finished his business (Unfortunately for Spike, since it smelled terrible in there. He definitely wouldn't like when he had to clean the bathroom).

"Sorry, Spike," he apologized in advance as he passed by the baby dragon, who was shelving a few books.

Spike turned away from the shelf in confusion. "For what?"

"Just make sure you have something to plug your nose ready."

Spike quirked an eyebrow as he turned back to his task. "Um... alright...?"

James exited the door to the library. He looked to his left , his right, and finally setting his gaze in front of him. Now he had to find Conscience and Pinkie. As he started walking down the road, he wondered where they might be. Then it hit him.

WHACK!

James was suddenly floored on his stomach by something solid and heavy. Feeling the familiar smooth texture, he didn't even have to look to know what it was: a hammer. More specifically, Conscience's hammer.

"How ya doin', hmm?" the culprit greeted.

"...What the f***, Conscience," James said with his face still on the ground.

"That's for leaving a note instead of saying something."

James sighed. "Fine, fair enough."

"Oh Conscience, you found him!" a cheery voice sounded. James looked up at the source of the voice.

"Pinkie, did you even try to talk him out of this?"

"Huh?" Pinkie blinked. "No. I didn't even know where he was. Well, not exactly. Conscience said you'd be done by now."

"So Pinkie said we should split up, so we could find you quicker," Conscience added.

Pinkie gave a questioning look. "What? No I di--"

"And I said 'Meh, why not,'" he continued while Signature Shrugging.

James deadpanned at Conscience and shook his head. "Yeah, sure. What have you guys been doing?

"Weeell," Conscience furrowed his eyebrows, "while you were elsewhere, I offered Pinkie a Leeroy ride." He summoned his cape. "She accepted. And she didn't want to get off."

"I said I was sorry!" the pink mare defended.

"You were pretty heavy to be carrying for two hours and seven minutes. Yeah, I kept track." Pinkie gave a sheepish look.

"Well, anyway, now would be a good time to see if RD and her friend have any free time, right?" James suggested.

"Yeah, that's fantastic idea!" Pinkie agreed.

Rainbow and Gilda laughed as they both touched down on a cloud from fiercely flying around in the air for some time.

"Whoa-ho, that was sweet," Gilda got up. "Just like old times."

"Yeah, only faster," Rainbow agreed as Gilda bumped her hoof. "So now what?" At that point, was when Pinkie's head popped through the cloud.

"Hey there."

"Huh?" the Flight Camp duo voiced in unison. As Pinkie's disappeared below the clouds, Conscience's head immediately followed after.

"How ya doin'?" he waved Cheerfully before he went back down. No sooner did that happen did James's head appear.

"Hi," he said flatly.

He disappeared and Pinkie reappeared. "It's later..." She switched with Conscience.

"And we caught up," he finished. James took his place.

"Apparently you're still busy," he said in time before he went back down.

Somehow, Conscience managed to bounce in sync with Pinkie, so both of them reappeared above the surface. "This was her idea," Conscience pointed to the pink mare before they came back down.

James came back up, "Sorry, we can leave."

"Pinkie Pie... you are so random," Rainbow smiled in amusement. Gilda had a rather displeased expression on her face, however.

She looked up, "Hey, Dash. Think you got enough gas left to beat me to that cloud?" she pointed a distance in front of her.

"A race? You are so on," Rainbow smirked as she reared back.

Gilda counted. "One, two, three, go!" they took off. James's head popped up as she said 'go,' and he was caught by surprise when they suddenly flew away.

"Wait, where are they headed?" he came back down.

"Hey!" he heard Pinkie's voice above him.

The race was over in seconds. "I win!" Rainbow exclaimed.

"As if. I won, dude," Gilda pointed to herself.

"No way!"

"Yes way."

"Oh, come on, I was way ahead of you."

"Uh, I don't think so."

The two old friends were so busy trying to claim their victory, they failed to notice the pink pony rising to their altitude via several balloons. (James was right below her waiting for Pinkie to tell if they were busy or not. Conscience was still enjoying himself on the trampoline.)

"Wow guys, that was really close. But I think Rainbow Dash beat you by a teeny weeny itty bitty hair. Or a teeny weeny itty bitty feather."

"Ha. See? Good thing Pinkie Pie's here to keep you honest, G." Gilda looked rather frustrated. But then... she pointed above them.

"Okay, Dash, last one to that cloud up there is a gnarly dragon egg. Go!"

WHOOSH!

As the air cleared after the takeoff, Rainbow was gone, but Gilda was still there.

"What the hell?" James squinted in confusion. He watched the griffon say something to Pinkie before popping a few of her balloons.

He watched as she slowly descended back to the ground. "Huh...," she frowned before zooming off. No more than three seconds later did she come back with what looked like a strange candy-themed, pony-powered flying contraption. Before she took off, James stopped her.

"Pinkie, hold on," he pulled out a Mini Mushroom. "I'm coming with you."

♩ ♩ ♩

Rainbow made it to the cloud. Gilda having caught up, she touched down shortly after. And then Pinkie returned on her Confection Machine... at least, that was the name mentally given by James, who was shrunk down and on Pinkie's shoulder.

"Oh wow. You guys almost got away from me that time," Pinkie said as she approached the two flying racers on the cloud.

Gilda narrowed her eyes, but then looked back at Rainbow. "So, Dash, got any new moves in your tricktionary, or are you 100% old school?"

Rainbow smirked. "New moves? Heh. Sit back G, this, is gonna take a while." And with that she took off.

Gilda turned to the earth pony behind her. "Hey Pinkie, com'ere," she motioned her towards herself.

"Yeah?" Pinkie came closer. She recoiled slightly with a grimace when Gilda grabbed the pole holding the propeller on her machine.

Gilda glared at her. "Don't you know how to take 'get lost' for an answer? Dash doesn't need to hang with a dweeb like you now that I'm around. You're dorkin' up the skies, Stinkie Pie. So make like a bee. Buzz off!" Pinkie yelped as she grabbed the propeller, causing the rest of the machine to spin instead. Letting go, the machine continued spinning out of control.

A short while later, Pinkie was sprawled on the ground, her 'Confection Machine' a wreck. "Hmph!" she frowned as she got up.

James, who'd fallen off during the incident, Explosively landed a safe distance in front of her, having already eaten a Super Mushroom.

He Hand Cracked. "So she's that type of bitch. I knew there was something wrong with that f***er!" he turned around. "You alright, Pinkie?"

"Yeah, I'm fine," she huffed.

[Later at the library...]

"So, Pinkie Pie, are you sure that this friend of Rainbow Dash is really so mean?" Twilight asked as she flipped to a certain page in a book she was looking at.

Pinkie had a very upset look on her face as she paced around the room. "Um, yeah! She keeps stealing Rainbow Dash away, she popped my balloons, and she told me to buzz off. I've never met a griffon this mean. Well, actually, I've never met a griffon at all. But I bet if I had, she wouldn't have been as mean and grumpy as Gilda."

"You know what I think, Pinkie Pie," Twilight looked at her.

"Hmm?" she stopped.

"Well, I think... you're jealous."

"Jealous!?"

Spike looked up from another book. "Green with envy. Well, in your case, pink with envy."

"Well, yes. Jealous. Listen Pinkie, I don't want to upset you, but just because Rainbow Dash has another friend doesn't make Gilda a grump. I mean, perhaps it's you, Pinkie, who needs to improve her attitude," the unicorn spoke softly.

"Improve my attitude? But I--... d--... b--... It's Gilda that--... d--... Are you seri--... d'rrgh!" Pinkie screamed in frustration before briskly walking out of the door, and closing it not-so-lightly.

James, who was seething in the back, finally spoke up. "Twilight, as much as I'd like to agree with you, I can't." He furrowed his eyebrows. "I was there, too. Gilda kept shooting these looks at Pinkie, and tried to get rid of her behind Rainbow's back."

"I'm sure she just wanted to catch up with Rainbow. It has been a while since they've seen each other."

James threw his hands in the air in exasperation. Was she serious? "I mean, f***, Twilight. Gilda told her to buzz off! There's not a single red flag going up in your head right now?"

"But you know how Pinkie Pie can be. I really don't think I could blame her. Even if she was a little rude...," her face crunched up slightly before she returned her attention to the book in front of her.

James Facewhipped. "F*** this," he left the library. If he couldn't convince her, he'd have to show her. But first, he was going to calm down first. At least then when he pissed himself off again thinking later about what he would do to expose Gilda for the ass**le that she was, he would be more level-headed. The first place to come to mind was Fluttershy's cottage. It was quiet, peaceful, and full of life.

Yeah. He'd see Fluttershy and maybe help her out with anything she might need. It was the least he could do if he were to arrive unexpected. His thoughts paused as he saw Pinkie Pie ahead of him. Maybe he could talk to her first, help her feel better.

KLPOW!

Pinkie didn't even look up from the ground, looking unhappy. James opened his mouth to speak, but... "James, do you think I'm jealous, too?"

Well, there you go. She was open to talk to someone. James's face tensed. "No, Pinkie. Gilda is mean. You have every right to be upset. I'd feel the same way had it been me."

[A short while later...]

Pinkie and James sat at a table outside with an umbrella sticking through it. Pinkie had a distant frown on her face as she sipped on a milkshake. James was across from her, having already downed a large cup of milk. He hadn't wanted to impose when she stopped at Sugarcube Corner to get a shake, but she insisted. So he settled for some milk. Boy, did he need a glass of booze after what happened that morning.

As Pinkie continued to absently drink her shake, they heard a swooshing sound followed by a voice. "That was sweet." Pinkie looked up. Upon seeing who it was, she ducked behind the table, causing her shake to jump to the opposite side... as well as tip James's glass over. He deadpanned at the potential mess she could've caused on his clothes. Fortunately, he'd already finished.

The source of the voice, Rainbow Dash, continued. "Ugh. I gotta take care of a few weather jobs around here. Shouldn't take long. Just, uh, hang out in town and I'll come find ya."

The one she was addressing, Gilda, replied, "That's cool, I guess. I'm gonna go chow down."

"Later!" And with that, Rainbow flew off.

James noticed her looking around like she was up to no good. She saw an elderly pale green earth pony mare at a vegetable stand, and gave a devious smirk. He pulled out his video camera (that he shares with Conscience) and set it on the table. "Looks like I'm gonna catch her in action."

They watched as Granny Smith walked up to the stand and sniffed the vegetation closest to her, when Gilda's tail appeared in front of her face. The result was instantaneous.

She yelped and pointed, "Aah! A rattler! A rattler!" She turned and... well... she tried to gallop away, but it looked more like she was trotting briskly in slow motion. "Run for the hills! Everypony forsake yourselves!" Had it not been a f*cked up scheme, James might've thought it was adorable seeing Granny Smith 'run' like that. But unfortunately, it was.

James had to bang on the table sort-of-softly with his hand to keep from breaking the table. He hated that, it always pissed him off more. Chances were, if he could hit something hard that was nearby and sturdier, he would. Too bad, there was nothing nearby to hit without drawing a lot of attention. Therefore, he was seething. And seething always made his anger grow.

"Does this f***er have any boundaries!?" he hissed quietly (which pissed him off, since he was abstaining from yelling). "Picking on a helpless aging mare, that's a new low." Gilda appeared from behind the stand with a look full of mirth. You think that's funny, ass**le!!? James didn't say it out loud, because he knew he might start yelling.

Gilda tapped a tomato on the stand with her tail. "This stuff ain't fresh, dude," she deadpanned at the pony managing the stand.

Pinkie looked after Granny Smith (who was hardly any further away than she was five seconds ago). "Aw. Poor Granny Smith. She didn't know it was a joke. How mean." She paused and shook her head. "No, no, I can't misjudge her. It was kind of a funny prank... I guess."

James would've Sharply snapped his head to look at Pinkie, but that would've made a noticably loud whip sound upon doing. So he settled for Violently snapping it instead. "Pinkie, don't second-guess yourself. That was wrong. You know better than to prank someone you know can't handle it."

Pinkie said nothing in return, and looked back to Gilda, who stopped and looked around. Seeing no one was looking, she grabbed an apple with her tail, and ate it in one bite.

Pinkie gasped. "I did misjudge her. She's not only a meanie mean-pants, she's also a thief!"

"Yes. Yes she is," James catch-phrased in agreement.

Conscience came out and rested his chin on his hand. "You gotta have a pretty strong tail to grab something like that."

"She contradicts herself," James replied. "She just said, and I quote, 'This stuff ain't fresh, dude.'"

"She called a mare 'dude,'" Conscience noted. James nodded.

"All right little ones. This way, this way. Mama duck, you're free and clear," they heard a soft voice. Although they did look, they didn't have to to know it was Fluttershy. She was slowly walking backwards, guiding a small group of ducks. Looking back, they saw Gilda walking right in her direction.

"...Sh*t," Conscience deadpanned. James had to refrain from cocking his sniper when the inevitable happened: the yellow pegasus bumped into Gilda.

"Hey!"

Fluttershy turned around. "Please excuse me," she said politely.

"I'm walkin' here," Gilda replied loudly as she sized up the meek pegasus.

James lost his cool. That is... if you could call burning mad 'cool.' "Hold on a second," he got up.

Fluttershy took a few steps back. "Oh, um, I'm sorry. I-I was just trying to--"

"Oh, I'm sorry, I'm sorry," Gilda mocked. "Why don't you--"

THUMP

Someone stomped loudly in between them. Gilda remembered that Rainbow introduced him this morning. 'Jimmy,' or something like that. What she didn't remember, however, was his eyes being red.

"I'm afraid you're in my way," James said darkly, his eyes threatening to burst into flames.

Gilda scoffed. "And what are you gonna do about it?"

James didn't answer, but kept his eyes locked on the griffon in front of him as he spoke to the mare behind him. "Fluttershy, go ahead and continue on your way."

Fluttershy, who was cowering, looked up at James... well, the back of him. "O-oh. Um, o-okay." She stood up shakily. "Alright, little ones. Right this way," she managed to say in a steady tone as she made her way around James and the griffon. (James was surprised that he didn't scare the ducks away when he stomped in front of Gilda. They were pretty brave, he had to give them credit.)

"Hey, where're you goin'? I wasn't done with yo--" she was cut off as James Violently grabbed her by the neck and turned it to face him again.

"Hey, ass****, it's rude to ignore someone when they're talking to you," he grit his teeth.

Gilda narrowed her eyes. "Why you little..."

KLPOW!

"What the--" she stared in confusion at the now vacant spot that James just was.

"I'm gonna have to ask you to excuse me."

Gilda whipped her head around to see James walking away. "Hey!" she flew after him.

James barely had time to look behind him and react. Luckily, he began running before he could catch her. She was pretty fast, James would give her that. Nowhere near fast as he was on the ground, but still respectably swift. Maybe almost as fast as he flew with his cape. In reality, he was letting her get close, but staying out of reach.

"Get back here!" she called after him.

He noticed that they were approaching the empty meadow just outside of Ponyville. When they were a good distance away from the town, James abruptly turned around. Gilda, caught off guard, failed to slow down in time... and flew straight into James's grasp.

Having caught her by the neck, James slammed her head against the ground and sprinted, dragging the side of her face along the plethora of grass blades. After a good five seconds, he brought up his arm, taking Gilda with it, and tossed her lightly into the air. Quickly grabbing her leg, he harshly swung her back to the ground on her stomach. Not giving her time to recover, he delivered a severe kick to her side, sending her rolling several meters away, air scarce in her lungs. Gilda barely had a second to writhe in pain, as James held her in the air by the neck... and immediately socked her Violently in the face, back to the ground. (He'd never told anyone, but he loved doing that: picking someone up by the neck and socking them back down like a volleyball.)

Gilda was dazed, her eyes wide. Everything happened so fast. One moment she was giving chase, the next moment she was hurting badly on the ground. She coughed, her breathing labored. Unfortunately, James was already looming over her, and firmly held his foot against her neck.

"Listen closely, mother f***er," he said in a dangerous tone. "It's f***ing bad enough you tried to get rid of Rainbow's friends behind her damn back." He pressed harder against her neck, causing her to grimace in agony. "But picking on them? That's far past the line. Especially with the pegasus you purposely let bump into you."

James picked her up with a strong and tight grip, again by the neck, and raised her head to his level to look her directly in her frightened eyes. "You better show some f***ing restraint when you act like you seemingly own everyone, or I will be very unhappy." He Violently threw her back to the ground, the griffon breathing heavily for a few seconds. "This talk will stay between you and me. Or else. And don't you dare ask me what that 'or else' is, it's none of your damn business, unless you anger me again."

He Hand Cracked and turned his back on her. Without turning around, he pulled out a Star Candy and tossed it behind him, right in front of Gilda. "Eat this... if you value your health." And with that, he stormed away.

James made it back in town. As he walked down the road, he felt much better. The look on Gilda's face after he beat it in made it all the more satisfying. So full of agony. So frightened, so... shaken up. James found himself half-wishing someone else like her would turn up again some time. That would be very refreshing. He almost slapped himself when he thought it would be nice. Ironically...

SMACK

James blinked. "What the hell?" The one who slapped him, Conscience, stood in front of him with an amused look on his face.

"You were about to walk into one of the buildings," Conscience gestured to the wall very close behind him.

"Huh. My fault, I was just celebrating in my moment of violence," he started walking, this time making sure to not get lost in his own train of thought.

"Nice. Anyway, Pinkie's setting up a gathering with Gilda as the guest of honor."

James looked at the ground in thought. "Alright then. We're invited, I presume?"

"Yep."

"Good. We'll be there."

Author's Note

Me: Finally! I got to hit someone that isn't a close friend of mine!
Conscience: ...I'm a 'close friend?'
Me: T_T
Um, no.