My Roommate Aria

Aria snored softly in her mess of sheets, sprawled out and laying on her belly with her face buried under her pillow and bed-head. Her blanket covered most of her torso but some limbs poked out of the warm embrace, notably her left leg whiched twitched every hour or so. It wasn’t long until she started to shift about more and more, grumbling as she fanally awoke. “Mnh... Fuck.” She stretched with a trembling body...

’crack!’

“Gah... Oh god.” Until something popped loudly, causing her whole body to seize before relaxing. “Fucking needed that...” Her eye peaked out from her hair, half-open and still drowsy. It’s gaze fixated toward the little skull-clock on her night stand, read 12:34. “Mnh... Might as well get-up.” She kicked off the blanket, revealing that she was wearing nothing but white socks. She rolled over and scratched at her belly before sitting up. “Ngh...!”

’crack!’

She jerked her head to the side and popped her neck, then the other...

’crack...’

Slightly softer, but the job was done. Next she spread her legs and... ”Gh-... Ahh...” Slowly and shakily started to pull something. “Mm~... Fuck.” The wet, sticky sounds and Aria’s blushing face told us exactly what was going on... After half a second of this erotic noise a nice little ‘pop’ followed, then Aria dangled the pitiful sight of a heavily used pink dildo by the ends of her fingers half a foot away from her face. “New I forgot something last night.” She simply dropped it onto the floor with a wet splat. “Gotta fucking pee... Probably clean myself while I’m at it.” Didn’t even bother grabbing any clothes, just walked out of her room vagina slightly agape and tits bouncing free with each half-lifted step.

“Finally awake, sleeping beauty?”

“Eat a dick, Anon.” She retorted in slight irritation. A happy Aria was a clean Aria, and this Aria wasn’t clean just yet. “Fuckin’... Cock-jockey.” She walked straight to the bathroom and sat her ass down on the toilet, didn’t bother checking if the seat was raised but luckily it wasn’t. Porcelain was still cold as fucking ice but at least she didn’t fall in so Anon could laugh at her. “Alright...” She relaxed herself and pushed, sighing as she emptied the night’s build-up with her eyes rolled back in relief. “Mmm... Soo much better.” Suddenly, her eyes realigned themselves, on full-alert no less.

.....

It was faint, but her ears picked up a... Tapping sound. It sounded kinda like... Like finger-tips moving along a hard surface. ”The hell...?” She looked around, seeing only the familiar bathroom walls and shower curtain. “Hm...” Maybe the shower faucet was leaking?... She’d have to tell Anon about that, who’d file a damage report to the landlady who’d probably blame him or Aria and make them call and have to pay the plumbers to fix...

.....

Anon like to vent to her sometimes about how little the landlady actually cares about their problems... If ya asked Aria, she’d tell you those two just need to get a fucking room and yell it out... Then end up throwing punches, which would lead to really, reeealy rough and intense sex... Well, that’s how Aria imagined it’d go, at least. But then again, Aria’s the very last person you’d go to for advice relating to... Well, whatever their hateful relationship is. Hell, she’s generally the last person you go to for sound advice as a whole!

She continued to pee for another few seconds before wiping, leaving the pot unflushed. Didn't want scalding water to hit her skin after all... Though it was more due to the fact she was lazy and tired. She checked if a towel was at hand, then opened the curtain and turned the faucet. The hiss of water against her ears put her sourness down like a crippled racehorse. “Mmm, hello sexy.” Quick check of temperature with her open palm and she stepped inside, as soon as the water hit her she was in another world entirely. “Aaaahhh..... Fuck yes...” The water broiled her skin, muscles relaxing with each passing second under the hot water. Her legs gave out and she plopped her fine, plump ass down onto the shower floor with a light splash. “Mm~... Turn me Violet, Mr. Shower-Head.” Masturbation felt good, sex felt amazing, but a stream of hot water down the back of her head?... Fan-Motherfucking-Tastic. Her mind simply stopped when the water hit, no worries or concerns, no urges or needs; none of those awful things haunted her when she was boiling herself like a fucking lobster dinner... Christ, she’d make sweet fucking love to the shower if it were physically possible!

’Splash!’

“What the...” Aria briefly considered opening her eyes. “.....” Yeeeaah, that thought was a still-born, if I may be so bold. Yes sir, dead before it even came to consideration! Such is the way of life...

.......

Wait, what was I-... Oh yeah! Anywho, Aria wasn’t in the mood for concern right now. Shower-time was relaxation-time and relaxation meant not giving two fucks! Besides, it was probably just one of the shower poof... Washing things that fell from the hook...

Wait, the hell was touching her feet?... Felt like... Oooh, that shudder up her spine signaled her that it wasn’t a shower poof... Whatever the fuck they were called. “(What the hell is touching my-... M-my.....)” Aria opened her eyes and... Her normal purple hue started to drain from her face... “S-... S-...”

Anonymous was sitting at home one lovely morning, enjoying his much-deserved day off. He was low on stock as of today and decided to close up early so he could order some more this afternoon. Even slept in for once! Woke up at 8 am rather then the usual 6. Needless to say, he was feeling good... Great, even! Even made some tea to sip on as he watched the mind-numbing television.

”SPIDERRRRR!!!!!”

Anonymous jumped in alarm, eyes wide and dazed.

.......

’light crack...’

A huge thunderbolt-shaped crack split his glass right down the middle, tea slowly draining from the crack and onto his crotch. A disgruntled scowl grew over his face like bad achne. “Too damn early for this bullshit...” Then he heard the bathroom door slam open. “Aria!?“

”SPIDER!!!” Aria screamed and out-right tackled Anon off his chair, soaking fucking wet and trembling like all hell had broke looks in his bathroom. She had him wrapped in a dual arm and leg lock, grip tighter than a virgin’s sphincter. “S-s-spider... B-b-b-big...!”

“Aria, for Christ’s sake!” He tried breaking free of her hold but it was for nought, she had him in a fucking vice. “It’s a fucking spider, Aria! A fucking spider!” He yelled in anger. “Stop being a damn baby and just kill it!”

“NO!” She parked her face straight into his shoulder, refusing to look at him. “I’m NOT going back in there!”

Anon just huffed... This wasn’t like his roomie, Aria wasn’t usually this big of a fucking pussy toward what was probably just a common house spider. “If you’re gonna go pissing your pants like a fucking toddler then let me go and I’ll fucking stomp it.”

“Anon, it fucking HISSED AT ME!” God, this bitch was impossib-... Wait, what did she say? “It’s big, Anon! Really, really big! You can’t fucking stomp it in one go!”

“Then I’ll get the fucking broom and-” Aria interrupted his solution by shrieking into his ear. “WHAT IS IT NOW!?”

“THE DOOR!” She yelled in fear. “IT’S CRAWLING OUT THE DOOR!!!”

“ARIA WHAT IN-!” Then he fucking saw it. “OH MY GOOD GOD!!!” She wasn’t lying, that bastard was BIG. Bark-brown in color with forest-green streaks, stalky and thin legs, the torso and spinneret together looked about as big as a size-11 boot. Yeah, he definitely recognized the species. Science classes around the planet praised this species as the biggest spider currently alive. “THAT’S A FUCKING EVERFREE BARK SPIDER!!!” He struggled and scrambled about but was still restrained in Aria’s vice-grip. “Aria let me go already!” She couldn’t hear anymore, she wasn’t there. Fear likely petrified her and instincts only told her to hold onto something for dear life. “Ugh, goddammit!” So, since he wasn’t walking anytime soon, Anon had to resort to inching away like a caterpillar while Aria was busy pissing herself in fear... God, he could only hope she wasn’t actually pissing on him right now.

.....

“It’s... C-closer!” Goddammit, he could feel warmth spreading from his thigh. “S-s-save me... It’s gonna lay eggs in my skin...” Now she was practically choking Anon.

“Stop psyching yourself out...!” Anon could feel his arms start to numb from her vice. “You’re gonna... Crush me!”

’HISSS!!!’

The last thing Anon saw was the spider in the air, Aria still latched to his back.

’SHRIEEEK!!!’

Anon had never ever heard Aria legitimately scream before, she wasn’t a girl you could scare so easily... But holy... Holy hell.

Anon actually felt a push, almost a burst from the raw volume! The bitch had some fucking lungs!

’Ba-dump!’

Oddly enough, looking back revealed that the spider was sent hurdling into the wall opposite of them. Wasn’t dead, just stunned and very startled. “Dunno what that was but I don’t care!” He quickly inched his way to the bedroom hallway, entering Aria’s room since it the door was still ajar. Couldn’t open and doors since Aria was literally crying and clinging to him in fear. “C’mon...!” He made it in the door way and slammed it with his feet.

’Thump!’

The door banged, a muffled hiss coming from behind it. “Jesus... Why on my off-day?” He didn’t need this shit, he didn’t need Aria trying to crush him or pissing on his leg, and he didn’t fucking need a giant bloodthirsty spider in his house! “Let go, Aria.”

“It... Touched me.”

Not this bullshit. “Aria it’s not in here, let me go!”

“H-Hold... Hold me, Anon.” Did that seriously just leave her lips? “Please... Please.”

“I can’t feel my arms, Aria.”

“Did it bite you!?”

“Because you CUT OFF CIRCULATION!” Anon snapped, Aria jumping off of him. “...Finally.” The blood slowly rushed back through his arms, slowly regaining the feeling and ability to move them. He laid there for a bit to recover and... Think?

.....

Aria sat at the corner of the room, naked and curled up in a ball while she pathetically sniveled. Anon stared half-lidded, internally punching himself. “Aria, I’m... I’m sorry.” He knelt down beside her, wrapping her in an embrace. “You’re okay, alright? It can’t get you in-“ She embraced him back, trembling in fear. “...here.”

“I... I hate bugs.” She looked up at him with tear-soaked eyes. “I’ve never been s-so scared... In all my life!” God... Anon felt so stupid.

No matter what shit she starts or what kind of trouble she gets into... Aria’s still human.

Sometimes Anon forgets that. “You’re okay, Aria.” He held her head, letting her hide in his shirt. She needed the comfort. “You’re gonna be okay... I promise.”

“Don’t... D-don’t let go.”

“I won’t.” He assured softly, hugging her tight. “Just try and calm down, okay?”

He could feel Aria tighten her grip... Then slowly release. “I’ll... Try.” That’s all he asks for, sweet innocent Aria.

’Bang!’

“Shi-ACK!!” Aria squeezed him tight. “A-... Aria...!” Was he turning blue...? Odd, she wasn’t even touching his neck. Was she actually constraining that much blood from-

’Snap!’

...Anon’s mouth hung ajar, but no sound came forth. Tears started to water, indescribable pain surging forth from his right arm. It was bending in a way that it wasn’t meant to, like a twig crushed under a shoe.

Aria only released moments after the sick snap, staring in horror at what she just did. “Oh god.”

Luckily his color was coming back, but that arm was... It wasn’t okay, let’s say that much. The life had left Anon’s eyes moments after and he fell into her breasts, startling her. “A-Anon!?” She pushed him off, the poor guy was out cold. “Oh fuck what have I done.”

’Rake! Raaake!’

That... That thing was scratching the door. ”Low hiss...” Aria crushed Anon in her embrace yet again, will she ever learn how frail humans are?

’Crackle’

Guess not. “Sh-shit!” She kept telling herself to let him go, she was hurting him! Yet her body disobeyed, trembling in fear and holding him for dear life.

”Why do you shiver like a hatchling...”

She could hear it, she could feel it’s presence.

”You, a fearless siren of immeasurable grit and centuries of knowledge, helpless at the sight of a lowly insect...”

“Sh-shut...”

”You’re a disgrace... I cannot believe you cower at such a pathetic-“ Aria felt a shiver run down her back, a soft yet sharp tacking at her temples forcing her to look up. ”BY OUR BLOOD IT’S HIDEOUS!!!” And it was dangling right over her, mandibles twitching and eight lifeless eyes staring her down. ”KILL! SMASH IT!! STOMP IT TO A PASTE!!! SMASH IT SMASH IT SMASH IT!!!”

Aria just... Collapsed. Her blood ran cold, her vision was blurring, any remaining amount of urine was being drained. “S...Sp...ider...” She lay there like a corpse, a black ring slowly enclosing her vision. She was blacking out, she was so stricken by fear that she was trying to mentally shut herself away. She couldn’t even hear her inner Siren anymore, she couldn’t hear anything!

But she could still see. She watched those grass-thin legs coming into view, it was looming over her...

But it skittered past her and out of her view. “(Why...?)” She was vulnerable, practically an easy kill. So why didn’t it... “(Anon.)” She moved her head just enough to see the spider crawling up his frame. “(No...)” But just like with Aria, it only stayed for a moment before crawling over him uncaringly. She watched it skitter up the wall and squeeze itself into the loose air-duct panel.

.....

She... She was okay. “.....Heh... Hehehe...” She couldn’t help but laugh. “This is... It’s a nightmare.” She crawled to Anonymous, still shaking in fear and the natural cold against her naked skin. “There’s no such thing as... Giant spiders.” The poor girl was losing it. “N-no... No such thing.” It was really the only means of comfort she could mentally acquire. “Please... Wake up.” She collapsed over Anon’s unconscious form. “Wake me up, Anon. Slap me awake, already.” This was just... Sad. “Wake me up... P-please.” Now the tears were forming, still refusing to face the harsh reality. ”I’m begging you... I wanna wake-up now.” She held him close, hoping and praying that one of them would wake up soon. She sobbed and sobbed in silence, the passing minutes and the protective embrace working to slowly pacify the poor girl. Her heart had slowed, her breathing calmed and controlled. She was still scared out of her wits and cursed with a heavy feeling of vulnerability...

But Anonymous was here.

He was here, still alive and close to her. That’s what gave her clarity... He was always here, giving her the comfort and protection she never asked for, let alone deserved.

Why, though? “(...Why does he give so much for a screw-up like me?)” Aria blushed a bit. “(Does he... Really just care that much?)” The idea was complete dog-shit in her mind. Be it human or Equestrian, everybody had a limit for being unconditionally kind... Why doesn’t Anonymous just fucking kick her already? She’s been literally nothing but trouble for him!

.....

.....

.....

Aria blushed... “A-...Anon?” No response... “Anon... C-can I be... Real, with you?” The hoped and prayed that he couldn’t hear her right now. She was begging even Starswirl that he wouldn’t hear. “I-... I-I...” She gripped his shirt in her fist. “I-love-you-Anon-okay!?” She nearly ripped his shirt open. “NO! N-no I mean I... I-I just really, really, really... Like you.” Aria was physically wanting to punch her own heart out right now, in the most literal form. She couldn’t stop blushing and she just hated it so much! “You just... You do so much for me, even when I turn around and call you names or make fun of you.” Tears were running again, but these were not fear-tears... These were the bitter-sweet tears of a Tsundere. “O-or get arrested for shit... Or get drunk in public, probably naked... Usually naked.” She took a hard swallow, sucking down her pride. “You just put up with so much shit from me and I just... I don’t know why you care so much for a failure like me.” Saying it aloud felt like a nail hammered into her heart. “I just... Make everything worse.” That’s when she felt it, something by far worse than any breed of spider.

She felt a hand, holding her back supportingly. “You’re not a failure.”

She wanted to fucking die. “And... You don’t make everything worse.”

A fatal heart-attack, thunderbolt striking her dead, fucking flash-cancer leading to an agonizing death! She would take anything, anything but this!

“I’m sorry I didn’t say anything... I wasn’t expecting you to just open-up like this.”

“You... Y-you jerk.” She just curled into a ball and sulked in shame and embarrassment. “Why are you so fucking nice.”

“Is it a crime to care for my friend?” Anon answered with his own question. “...Well?”

Aria just grew sour and resentful. “It should be... Fucking hate you.”

“Yeah, I love you too, Ar-“

”NOO! SHADDUP!!” She snapped, face a deep magenta. “Don’t fucking-!”

’Hisss!’

Aria, being the scared little arachnophobic she was, quickly leaped to Anon’s side and hugged him tight. “I’m-sorry-I’m-sorry-I’m-sorry!” Yep. Back to shaking like a leaf. “I-I love you, Roomie! I love you, I promise! Please please kill that spawn of Satan before it gets through the vents again!”

“Again!?” The vent cover fell to the floor with a clang, eight red glowing dots staring at them from the darkness of the duct. “Is was in here!?” He could feel her grip tighten around his waist. “Aria, no! Just cal-“

’SCREEEAAAAAAM!!!!!’

It felt as if Anon’s head was trying to pop like a zit, the raw power behind that scream was... Holy fuck, it was so powerful! “ARIA, FUCKING CHRIST!” He couldn’t fucking hear anything now. “WHAT THE LITERAL FUCK WAS THAT!?!” Anon saw the spider, trembling badly. It fell out of the vent and hit the floor, legs curling up and...

.....

“ARIA DID YOU FUCKING KILL THAT THING!?” Anon asked, still pretty deaf. “I THINK THE SCREAM ECHOED IN THE VENTS OR SOME SHIT AND KILLED IT!” He looked to see that Aria had passed out behind him, deathly pale. He propped her up with his good arm and checked her neck for a pulse. “HOLY CRAP, SHE HAS SOME LUNGS...” Though weak, there was a pulse, and as a bonus a dead fucking spider!

.....

Buuut he still had an arm that was hopefully only dislocated, was deaf by all accounts, and had been urinated on at least once today. Now he had to go to the hospital and take care of the spider’s carcass... But, maybe not everything was in vain. He did get to know Aria a little better through this experience.

He learned that the girl has a fear of spiders, could potentially crush him, and has lungs made of adamantium... But most importantly, he learned that she cared for him just as much as he did for her.

Maybe even a bit more than he did... But she’d never admit it.