"Anyone seen Cheerilee? I haven't seen her all day." I ask as I scratch my head.

"Last time I saw her she was in her bedroom with Chrysalis between her legs." Luna answers.

"I asked where she was I didn't need to know that she and Chrysalis where 'wine' tasting." I say. "Anyway I'm gonna leave them to it, I don't need to see some hot.... steamy.... totally inappropriate lesbian action."

"Don't lie. We all know that you have a soft spot for lesbian sex. Or should I say a HARD spot." Celestia says with a giggle.

"It's not my fault two ladies going at it is hot. Most men agree with me." I say proudly.

"I don't know if that's something you should be proud of but whatever." Celestia says.

"Hey Adrian. Me and Fluttershy here don't mind giving you a show do we?" Rainbow Dash says with a smile.

"Oh my." Fluttershy says as she hides behind her mane.

"Seen it, jerked off to it AND joined in." I point out.

"Yeah but have you ever done me, Fluttershy AND Rainbow Burst?" She says with a raised eyebrow.

"No and I don't want to." I say with a sigh. "Why do you guys want me to fuck my kids so badly? It's wrong."

"Anyway I think it's time to hand out more presents. Where's Gentleshy?" Luna asks.

"Oh shit! I'll be right back!" I say as I run out of the room.

I run towards the bathroom and burst through the door. In the bathtub Gentleshy is playing with a rubber ducky.

"D-Daddy? W-What's wrong?" Gentleshy asks nervously.

"Nothing sweetie. Are you ready to open your presents?" I ask with a smile.

"Yay!" Gentleshy squeaks.

I pick her up out of the tub and put her on the ground, I then grab a towel off of the towel rack and start to dry her.

"What where you hoping to get for your birthday?" I ask.

"I-I really w-wanted a new diary.... O-One with a lock on it so Rainbow Burst can't open it anymore." She answers shyly.

"Has she been reading your Diary without your permission?" I ask.

"Y-Yeah." Gentleshy answers with a sniffle.

"Shh. It's okay Gentleshy I'll make sure she doesn't do it again." I say as I gently stroke her mane.

"R-Really?"

"Yes. Of course I will sweetie." I smile.

"ANYONE SEEN MY STRAP-ON?! I NEED IT! ME AND CHEERILEE ARE LOOKING TO DO SOME FUCKING!" Chrysalis's voice an be heard shouting.

"Dear god." I groan as I pinch the bridge of my nose.

"T-That was something E-Eh Daddy?" Gentleshy giggles.

"Yeah.... It sure was." I sigh then chuckle.

"NO BUT YOU CAN BORROW MINE! I USED IT LAST NIGHT ON SWEETIE BELLE BUT YOU WON'T MIND RIGHT?!" Scootaloo's voice shouts back.

"Oh come the fuck on...." I mumble.

"C-Can I go open my present now Daddy?" Gentleshy asks with puppy dog eyes.

"Of course you can. I'll meet you there." I smile.

• 1 Week later -

"Dad! Ah need yer 'elp!" AppleBuck shouts.

"What's up sugar cube?" I ask as I enter the room.

"Ah can't set up this gosh darn TV. Ah keep gettin' caught up in tha wires." She says with a pout.

"Leave it to me." I say as I help untangle AppleBuck.

After 20 minutes of helping AppleBuck I'm left tired and sweating a little from all of the exertion.

"There ya go." I pant. "All done."

"Thanks! Ah can finally watch mah own shows fer once!" AppleBuck says happily.

She then trots over to her bed and plugs a pair of headphones into the TV and watches whatever's on.

'It's getting close to bed time. I should get showered up and ready for bed.' I think to myself as I leave the room and head towards the bathroom.

I get undressed and enter get in the shower.

"Sup."

"WHAT THE FUCK!" I shout as I jump back in terror.

"Ow my ears."

"RAINBOW BURST! GET OUT!" I shout angrily.

"But I was here first you pervert! You tried to sneak in with me and I caught you! You should get out!" She shouts back angrily.

"Oh shit you where here first! Oh fuck fuck fuck!" I say in a panic.

"But since your here I know something we could do." She says with a sultry smile.

"Mommy...." I squeak.

"I'll be your Mommy if you'll be my Daddy." She smirks.

I run out of the shower only to have my feet grabbed.

"HEEELP! DEAR GOD HELP ME!" I shout as I scratch at the floor.

"Don't worry. I'll help you." Rainbow Burst moans.

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"

• 30 Minute Later -

"God I've never cum so hard and so many times in my life." Rainbow Burst says with a giggle. "How was it for you Dad?.... Dad?"

I'm curled up into a ball shaking.

"Stop overreacting. I know you liked this tightness." She says proudly.

"I just got raped.... What the fuck is going on? Why can I not just have a normal family that doesn't want me juicing there insides.... Fucking Ponies." I mumble.

"We need to do that again sometime soon." She winks. "See you later."

Author's Note

Well that happened. What do you guys think? The weirdness isn't stopping anytime soon!