Find Her, Keep Her

Roughly a year had passed since Kyle had been stabbed, and both he and Lyra were leading yet another stretch of their modest lifestyle together. They would go for long walks together, watch movies, cook new dishes, play video games, and of course, help each other with all the household chores.

They were outside working on the lawn; Kyle was pushing a lawn mower around, while Lyra, with protective eyewear on, was using a weed-whacker to edge the lawn, holding it with her levitation. They were both keeping a steady pace going with the work... until Kyle happened to spot a truck pull up next to the gate, honking its horn. His eyelids jumped open.

"LYRA!" Kyle called out. "Stop and hide!"

Lyra immediately stopped the weed-whacker. "What?" she asked.

"Hide! Someone's here!" Kyle said.

Fortunately, she was already in the blind spot of a large bush, and simply crouched down behind it to conceal herself further.

"Okay... I'm gonna go see what this is all about." Kyle said just before he started walking down.

He happened to recognize the truck, but he could not place where from, exactly. As he approached the driveway gate, someone opened the driver-side door and stepped out... and this, for sure, made Kyle remember whose truck it was.

"Ed..." Kyle whispered to himself. "...shit."

Ed came around his truck to the gate, giving a stern stare at Kyle.

"So..." his stepfather began. "...even after you move out, you still like to give everybody so much bullshit!"

Kyle narrowed his eyes. "What are you even talking about?"

"Don't play dumbass with me! You got my son arrested! You were egging him on! You did this!" Ed thundered.

Kyle's glare became ever more angry as Ed was saying all of this to him.

"Don't you dare give me that look!" Ed warned.

Kyle clenched his fists. "You have the sheer nerve to come to my property and start accusing me of something that I didn't even ASK for!?" he said.

"You wouldn't imagine how much trouble I went to just to find you!" Ed stated. "Open the gate, now!"

Kyle did nothing for a moment.

"Open the fucking gate, or I will bust it down with my truck! NOW!" Ed thundered.

There was no point arguing; it would just keep going on forever. Kyle had tried to retaliate with Ed before, and it never ends well.

"Fine..." Kyle said, pulling the remote for the gate out of his pocket.

He pressed the button, and the gate began to move sideways, out of the way.

"...But you should know, it's a privilege for just anyone to visit my house." Kyle stated.

Ed seemed absolutely astonished by the mere existence of Kyle's mansion.

“This is your house?” Ed asked. “How the HELL do you afford somethin' like this!? Are you just spendin' more than you earn!?”

“Hell no! I spend within my budget, and I've got quite a lot of cabbage in my vault!” Kyle said.

Ed tilted his head. “Vault? What the fuck are you talkin' about?” he asked.

Kyle sighed. “Come with me...” he said as he reluctantly let Ed into his mansion.

Behind them, Lyra followed the two inside, staying hidden all the time...

Kyle took Ed into the basement, and pushed the small bookcase out of the way. Ed's eyes went tremendously wide at the sight of the heavy metal door in the wall.

“You've gotta be fuckin' kiddin' me...” Ed muttered.

Kyle entered the passcode (hiding it from Ed's view with his cardigan), scanned his fingerprint and retina for the biometric lock system, and spun the handle like a wheel. When it stopped, Kyle swung the door open, revealing the several thousands of dollars in cash behind the bulletproof glass barrier that required the key to open. Ed stared in awe and shock for a few moments, just before turning towards his stepson.

“ARE YOU SERIOUS!?” Ed thundered. “You make THAT kind of money!?”

“Damn straight, I do!” Kyle responded smugly.

“From WHAT!?” Ed questioned.

“From ARTWORK!” Kyle thundered back.

“Don't you cop that attitude with me, young man!” Ed threatened.

“This is MY house! I'm over eighteen! I live on my own! I CAN DO WHATEVER THE HELL I WANT!” Kyle said. “You're not the boss of me!”

“I'll deal with this later...” Ed said, returning his attention to the safe. “...but you're tellin' me that you make THIS kind of money by posting shit drawings online!?”

“They're not shit! Everyone thinks they're really good!” Kyle said. “I'm pretty famous on the internet! Did you even know that? Several people request commission artwork from me, which is how I get all this money; people pay me to paint what they want!”

Ed shook his head. “You can't make money like THIS!”

“Yes, I can!” Kyle said. “All my income is reported to the IRS, and I pay my taxes! Plus, I have the best tax preparation agencies file my tax returns for me!”

“NO!” Ed shouted. “You are not doing honest labor! You shouldn't be getting paid money to paint!”

“What are you even saying?” Kyle asked.

Ed gritted his teeth. “I'm saying you need to go ahead and give up on your dreams, because you can't be living in your little fairy-tale! Grow up, get a real job, make a livin'! BE PART OF THE REAL WORLD!” he said.

“Painting IS my job! It's what I want to do! I have thousands of fans depending on me!” Kyle said.

“I don't care! Don't be sittin' on your ass in front of a canvas all day! Work for eight hours, and then come home and screw around with your brushes and paint! Do some VOLUNTEER work! ANYTHING!” Ed retaliated.

Kyle was absolutely enraged. He did not leave Ed's house to still be under his thumb.

“In fact, I think I just might have a job lined up for you.” Ed said. “One of my friends I met at the brewery is gonna need help on his farm. I'm gonna tell him that you have accepted his request to be employed by him. You'll be mowing grass, taking eggs from the chicken coops, building fences, digging trenches for pipes. You'll be doing whatever there is do to.”

Despite his extreme reluctance to the topic, Kyle pressed further: “How much would I be making?” he asked.

“Minimum wage.” Ed said.

Kyle narrowed his eyes and pursed his lips. “Not happening! I'm willing to bet I make more money in a month than that place would ever pay in a year!”

“But you gotta be doin' real work!” Ed said. “You can't be one of those people who just cruise through life takin' everything from people doin' real work!”

“You're just JEALOUS!” Kyle shouted. “All those years, you were doing nothing but inhibiting and hindering my passion! YOU WERE HOLDING ME BACK!”

“I'm not holdin' you back! You're holdin' yourself back!” Ed argued.

“You're doing nothing but ruining my LIFE!” Kyle shouted again.

“I'm not ruinin' your life; the art's ruinin' your life!” Ed claimed. "I was helping you to make you successful before you went on your happy-ass way!"

Kyle decided to put on a smile, dismissing his rage and deciding to kill with kindness.

“Well, it's not like anyone could ask me to be an artist, or ask me to be a carpenter or builder...” Kyle said, walking over to the wine cabinet. “...I just feel that it's best for people to enjoy doing what they do...”

He pulled a bottle of red wine from its place.

“...yes, it is important to have a diverse skill range, so that you know how to maintain your place of living...”

He spun a corkscrew into the cork.

“...but deliberately forcing it is a bit extreme...”

He pried the cork out.

“...some things can seem so epic that one would feel like it is overrated, and like they have it too easy, perhaps becoming a bit envious...?”

Kyle poured some wine into two crystal goblets sitting on the shelf below the wine rack.

“...But, though I am a famous freelance millionaire artist, one thing I can say, I am not cocky or conceited!”

Kyle picked up his own glass, while offering the other to Ed.

“So... as a small token of my appreciating the drive you gave me to follow my dreams, would you care for a glass of Cabernet Sauvignon? Imported from Italy, aged four years...” he said, taking a sip from his glass.

Ed stared at the glass in his hand, before a look of rage filled his eyes. He held the glass up beside his head, and launched it straight at Kyle's head. Fortunately, Kyle was quick to duck, causing the glass to shatter on the wall behind him, staining it red with the wine. Kyle stood up and looked back at the stain on the wall. Once again, he did not resort to anger. He wanted to be the antithesis of Ed just to mock him.

“What a shame...” Kyle said, passively. “...a waste of perfectly good red wine.”

Ed shook his head, veins pulsing in his neck and temples. "You get my son arrested... and now you just cruise through life and disregard all of the good work practices I gave you!? YOU ARE AN ABSOLUTE SON OF A BITCH WHO DOESN'T DESERVE ANY OF IT!" he thundered.

With that, he started going on a rampage, tipping furniture in the basement and smashing the decorative items.

"Hey!" Kyle shouted. "What the hell are you doing!?"

"Teachin' you a lesson!" Ed answered, just before tipping over a decorative onyx obelisk.

"You think you can just destroy everyone's property to get them to do what you want!?" Kyle asked.

"Going back to your previous statement, I am SO the boss of you!" Ed shouted. "I gave you the food on your plate, the roof over your head, and everything else out of my good nature, and you just whine and bitch in silence just 'cause it's not good enough for you! Well, that's the REAL WORLD! SOMETHING THAT YOU ARE TOO SCARED TO EVEN TRY TO GET INTO!"

Ed grabbed the poker from the fireplace, tipped the bookcase over, and started jabbing the safe door with it, as if attempting to pry it open.

“Oh, we got a madman here!” Kyle remarked.

"And I say that all that pretty green stuff in there's mine!" Ed stated. "It's gonna be the price you pay to me for everything I ever did for you, and it's gonna be every cent of it!"

Kyle hastily ran upstairs, where he found Lyra listening in horror at what was happening.

"What the hell is going on!?" Lyra asked.

"My stepdad's trying to rob me, and he's broken a lot of my things already." Kyle said. "So, I need to grab something, and it'll hopefully get him to leave..."

Not more than a few minutes later, Kyle quickly returned from his room to find Ed resuming his attempt to open the safe.

“Stop right now!” he ordered the psychotic middle-aged man.

“SHUT THE HELL—” Ed stopped speaking as he turned to look at Kyle...

...and down the muzzle of a stainless, nine-shot, .22 Magnum revolver.

“I said... stop right now.” Kyle said, changing his shouting tone to a more silent, demanding one.

“Usin' a twenty-two? Don't ya know a damn thing about guns!?” Ed thundered.

“Yes, this is a twenty-two caliber handgun. But, bear in mind, these are Magnum rounds. They will go right through your skull at a close range.” Kyle stated.

“AND DON'T YOU KNOW YOU'RE NOT SUPPOSED TO AIM THEM AT PEOPLE, ESPECIALLY WITH YOUR FINGER ON THE TRIGGER!?” Ed shouted.

Kyle leveled the revolver at Ed's face, pulling back the hammer.

“You wanna raise your voice at me like that again...?” he asked, menacingly.

Ed snarled, his trademark veins returning.

"...Get your fat, drunk ass out my door, and off my estate." Kyle demanded in a threatening tone.

In a split-second, Ed grabbed the barrel of the gun, pointed it upward, and kicked Kyle in the thigh, sending him backwards. He got hold of Kyle's firearm, and turned it on its owner. Kyle himself stared in utter shock at the weapon pointed at him.

"You put a gun to my head..." Ed said. "...I put some bullets in your skinny-ass torso!"

Ed tried to fire the weapon, but it just clicked.

“Huh?” Ed uttered as he rotated the cylinder.

Again, he tried pulling the trigger, but no discharge occurred. Kyle smirked.

“The hell are you tryin' to pull!?” Ed asked.

Kyle reached into his pocket, and held up a small piece of metal.

“...I took out the firing pin.” Kyle said. “I figured someone, like an intruder, would try to wrestle the weapon away from me... and now that I have it on video...” he pointed to the surveillance camera in the basement living room. “...I can show the police that you tried to murder me on my own property after trashing my place! These cameras record audio as well!”

"YOU LITTLE BITCH, GET OVER HERE!" Ed said, darting for Kyle.

Kyle rolled away as Ed tumbled, and quickly rushed for a decorative-but-functional Japanese sword hanging on his wall. As Ed was standing to make another rush, Kyle grabbed the katana and pulled the saya off, discarding it. Just as Ed came up to him, he stopped short of the sword impaling his massive belly, which Kyle held out in front of him.

"Now this is a weapon that will be very dangerous for you to try and grab from me!" Kyle said.

He held the katana blade to Ed's throat.

"Make any sudden move, and I cut your fucking head off!" Kyle warned.

Ed was growling for breath. "You're gonna get it!" he uttered.

"I don't think so..." Kyle said, smugly. "...Lyra, come down here and help me with him!"

"Coming!" Lyra said, running down the stairs.

Ed was completely in shock upon seeing Lyra.

"What the actual fuck...?" he said.

"Remember me...?" Lyra said, smirking and raising a brow.

"WHAT ARE YOU!?" Ed asked loudly.

Lyra shrugged. "Figures you wouldn't remember me... and you won't remember in a few moments from now!" she said.

"That's right." Kyle said. "So, since you'll forget, I have nothing to lose from explaining it all."

Ed stared in confusion back and forth at the two.

Kyle began: "See, this is Lyra Heartstrings, a Unicorn pony from the land of Equestria, and she somehow ended up being teleported to this world. I found her only a couple of years before moving out of your shitty house, and raised her to the best of my ability, keeping her safe from Danny and you!"

"WHAT?" Ed asked. "You been raising the green horse in my house!? I told you; no pets in my house!"

"Oh, but Lyra's no pet..." Kyle said, before holding up his hand to show his golden ring. "...she's my wife."

Ed's eyes went as wide as tennis balls. "Your what...!?"

"It's true." Lyra said. "Kyle and I got married a little while ago... and might I say, he's the best husband a mare could ever ask for! You're the evil one here! Kyle is a really kind, caring person! You've mistreated him for WAY too long!"

By now, Ed had a very disgusted look. "Married to a HORSE!? You have any idea how wrong that is!? I'm thinkin' you got some sort of mental illness, Kyle... I'm gonna be talking to a few doctors about having you put into an asylum!" he said.

"Oh, that won't happen..." Lyra said, as he her began to glow.

Ed's eyes glowed the same yellow color as his expression became devoid of emotion.

"...because I will make you forget me, and you'll be taking a little nap..." Lyra finished, a wicked grin on her face.

Just after Lyra performed the amnesia spell, Ed's eyelids began to fall as she performed the sleeping spell on him, and then he slumped over on the floor.

"Good job, Ly!" Kyle said.

"So..." Lyra said, returning her gaze to Ed. "...what should we do with him?"

Kyle pondered for a moment. "Well... all we gotta do is make sure he isn't going anywhere..." he said.

So, Lyra levitated the unconscious Ed upstairs, and Kyle was grabbing some nylon cord out of his utility closet...