A Different World

"... and this is Sugarcube Corner," the pink mare finished with a twirl. "The finest bakery in Equestria."

The lungs on that beast were amazing. From the moment I stepped off of the train, to now, she had led us on a tour of the entire town without ever pausing for air. The staff the princesses had sent with me were gasping for air from the exercise, despite me telling them multiple times to just wait for us somewhere.

In fact, the two maids that had been sent with me had to ride atop my back after the first dozen or so houses. Yes. She told us the names and residences of everyone in town. Poor maids were exhausted from the running. I was so giving them a break. And I was also now the one responsible for pulling the luggage cart. Yikes, they seemed to think I needed a lot.

"Thank you, miss Pie," I smiled gratefully, slipping out of the harness, and gently lowering the maids to the ground. "Please give these two some nourishment and a good seat."

One of the maids started to protest. "Your majesty. We should be taking care of your luggage. there is no need to worry about us."

I chuckled and patted her head. She wasn't Sugar Beet, but this little earth pony was adorable. "Now, now. Non of that. I will not be responsible for injuring such good little creatures."

They both blushed. The other was Sugar Beet, and she was quick to give me a hug. "Oh, thank you, sire. We've never been so exhausted. Ugh, all this sweat. It's ruining our uniforms."

"Then you should take a few hours off," I instructed them as I herded them in front of me into the bakery. "Get some what, talk to people. Sleep, or something... really thought I had something clever to say."

"Who cares, just keep talking," Pinkie giggled, suddenly appearing on my back and hugging my neck. "I am the luckiest mare in the world. Granny Pie always said I would get a prince."

"Tell, me," I asked as I duck through the door, almost having to crouch, "was your granny as energetic as you?"

Pinkie shook her head. "Of course not, silly. "No one was faster than Granny Pie. Ran herself to death, she did. Ah, I miss her. Of course, she would've been trying to fatten you up by now. You really need to fill out Mr. Boney."

"I'm not that thin, am I?" I asked, a little putout.

"Y-you kind of are," came a small voice off to the side. I turned to see the other five mares seated around a circular table, an array of confection already laid out. I thought for sure I knew horse. Why was everyone concerned about my weight?

"Greetings, Fluttershy," I inclined my head towards her. She blushed and looked away. She was really cute.

"So, you decided to show up after all," the blue one said with a huff, blowing some of her mane out of her face.

"Don't listen to her," Applejack rolled her eyes. "She was squealin' like a filly meetin' the new baby before you walked in."

"I was not," Rainbow loudly cried, face bright red as she looked accusingly at the farm mare.

"Please excuse them," Rarity, said, patting a cushion beside her, "ever since Celestia offered them a place in the royal herd, they've been vying for higher positions."

"Higher positions?" I asked, sitting down beside her. Pinkie slipped from my back and onto my other side, where she quickly snuggled up. I wrapped a wing around her with a smile. In some ways she was like an excitable puppy.

"Well, there is a hierarchy within a herd," she explained. "The highest positions, of course, being taken by the princesses. Next is myself, as I am very skilled in magic and would make for an excellent housekeeper."

Rainbow Dash and Applejack both huffed at that.

"And the nobles would never stand for a pegasus or mud pony to hold a high position in the herd," the pegasus muttered angrily. "Don't try to tell me I'm wrong."

I was starting to paint a picture.

"Next would be... which ever one of those two wins whatever competition they're playing," Rarity pointed to the two mares in question. "They're the strong mares of your herd. Their job is to back you up to defend the others and your children."

"Then... Pinkie," she said peering around me to make sure Pinkie wasn't doing anything. She quickly pulled the Pink mare's shirt up to cover up the copious amounts of cleavage she had slowly been exposing. "She is your peacemaker. She'll do her best to calm rivalries and within and outside of your herd."

Pinkie frowned as she looked down at her covered bust. "Awe... he likes my breasts."

Rarity rolled her eyes. "He's a stallion. Of course he likes breasts. That doesn't mean you can go and tease him like that."

She cleared her throat. "And lastly would be Fluttershy. She's the nanny and caretaker for the foals and anypony who gets sick."

"And I'm her guardian," Rainbow blurted out, throwing a defensive wing around the buttery mare.

"Yes yes, so we've heard," Rarity nodded.

"So... what's a guardian?" I asked after no explanation was readily given.

Rarity pressed a hand against her mouth. "Oh, I'm sorry. The guardian is the protector of the nanny. While she will back you up in dangerous situations, her other goal is to help the nanny when she is overwhelmed. It also gives her extra rights for herd communion."

Communion? I imagined a private religious ceremony involving wine and crackers. I could dig it.

"So, that's actually very interesting," I mentioned, some rather thought out dynamics go into these harems.

"And then there are the concubines," Twilight spoke up. She had a notebook that she was filling with... well... notes.

"Concubines?" I asked.

Twilight nodded. "Yes, extra mares within your herd who willingly contract themselves to have your children."

"Calling them 'extra' is so impolite, dear," Rarity chided Twilight. "You'll have to excuse her manners. She likes the ye olde dictionary descriptions."

I nodded. "I see. But, if I may, if the princesses are the head of the royal herd, who is the head of a normal herd?"

"The stallion is always the head of the herd," Rarity informed me. That seemed weird, in this world especially. "But, I know what you mean. In the average herd, the lead mare is the housekeeper. Moi."

"Again, noble bias," Rainbow muttered again. Applejack could only nod her head.

"Of course, that would mean I'd out rank you easily, Dash," the farm pony smirked roguishly.

"What?" Rainbow demanded, scowling at the orange mare.

"When was the last time you cleaned your room?"

Rainbow suddenly became very quiet. She turned her back with sulky huff. Fluttershy took pity on her and pulled her into a hug.

"There-there, Rainbow," she said soothingly, "I think you'd make an good housekeeper."

"No I wouldn't," Dash said under her breath. "Applejack's right. I'm just a jock... strong mare's all I'm good for."

Fluttershy didn't argue. "Maybe so. But you could still be the stronger strong mare."

Rainbow just rolled her eyes and shifted until she could lay the side of her head atop of her fellow pegasi's rack. Social these ponies were.

Then I heard a rapping on the window. I turned my head to see... at two dozen mares all staring wide-eyed at me through he glass. I then took a moment to look around the bakery. Empty. Save for us, and the two maids... as well as a chubby blue mare who stood wide eyed behind the counter.

I hadn't noticed her before.

"Um... hello miss," I said with a smile.

She smiled nervously back. "Y-y-you really can talk."

"Yes," I nodded. "I really can."

She continued to stare back. "Uh... t-tell me i-if you need anything."

I nodded. "Don't worry."

"So... we've got an audience," I remarked, indicating the window.

The mares nodded.

"It was bound to happen," Applejack said with a shrug. "You're big news after all."

"With plenty of big to write news about too," Pinkie chuckled.

"Pinkie," Twilight groaned. "Stop looking at his stallionhood."

I quickly turned my head to see the the pink mare in question was looking between my legs. "Hey. We're not married yet. I may have been a conqueror in my old world, but I did have some class."

Pinkie pouted. "Fine. But... you show me yours I'll show you mine?"

She bounced her brow suggestively as she slowly tried to pull her shirt down again. Rarity caught her.

"Enough, Pinkie," Rarity growled warningly.

Pinkie sighed and rolled her eyes. "Spoil sport."

Just then, there was some commotion by the door. We all turned to try and see. My guard escort was blocking the door to give us privacy.

"Let me through," a voice cried out earnestly.

"Sorry, ma'am," one guard said, "but this building has been reserved for a private party between the new prince and his future harem."

"I'm a member of the press."

"All the more reason to keep you out. We don't need you turning him into a sideshow."

"A sideshow?" the reporter, apparently, cried out. "I'm a reporter, the whole world is nothing but a sideshow."

"Just get back, ma'am."

"Alright, I didn't wanna have to do this," the reporter sighed wearily. "Lerooooy jenkiiiiiiiiins."

I nearly shat myself.

A split moment later, a mint mare burst past the guards, using a heavy duty wooden camera mount as a flail. She sported a trilby with a playing card in the ribbon, a brown suit and tie, and had one of those old timey 35mm cameras about her neck. In a burst of desperation, she tossed the tripod to the side and leapt at me, grabbing my tail just as the guards grabbed her feet.

"Noooo," she cried. "Please. This is the story of the Century. No. The millennium.... no.... it's the story of... of... ever. Please give me an interview mister prince stallion sir."

"Lyra?" Rarity asked. From the looks on everyone's faces, she must have been known around town.

"Oh, hi?" the mare grinned while suspended off the floor between the guards and my tail. Weird, you would think that that would hurt more. "Can you convince the guards to let me go?"

"Eh... no," Rainbow Dash said with a shake of her head.

"Oh, please?" Lyra wept, her grip like iron. "I need this. Bonbon won't let me join her herd unless I make something of myself."

"Well, you should have thought of that before you decided to join the Equestrian Intruder," Applejack rolled her eyes.

"Equestrian Intruder?" I asked, a sneaking suspicion in my brain.

"A ragsheet, darling," Rarity said wit a wave of her hand. "They write anything."

So, like the National Inquirer.

"W-well they've told the truth before," Fluttershy brought up, trying to hide behind Rainbow Dash.

"A stopped clock is right twice a day," Twilight said with a shrug.

"Every story I've written is true," Lyra cried, her grip started to give. "Oh please. Just give me this break. I just need one little chance to prove myself."

Something snapped inside my head. Something familiar.

"STOOOOOOOP."

Everyone froze. Everyone Stared at me. Everyone seemed shaken to the bone.

I glared at my guards. "Let... her... go."

They swiftly obeyed. I held out a hoof to help her up. "An interview with such a lovely creature? How could I possibly refuse?"

Lyra gasped and wiped her eyes. "R-really? You mean it?"

I nodded, and gestured to an unclaimed cushion. "Join us, please."

Rarity gasped. "You're not serious are you? They're just a sensationalist piece. Only foals and country bumpkins read them."

"Hey now," Applejack cried, offended. Rarity blushed apologetically.

"But, if I get the first interview with him, everyone will read it," Lyra pointed out, gesturing towards the window. "There are some big newspaper reporters out there. The very fact I'm getting an interview with you is going to be front page news everywhere. Everyone's going to buy the Intruder. I'll be up for every journalist award in book."

"Glad I could help," I said with a chuckle. I looked about the table at the shocked mares. "So what if she works for a newspaper you don't like? The people do have a right to know. And, in my experience, all news organizations are mostly full of liars and vermin refuse. Ms. Lyra here gets the first interview. Perhaps even more."

"I've never been so happy in my life," Lyra cried tears of joy as she snapped a picture (DAMN THAT FLASH WAS BRIGHT), and floated a pen and paperpad in her magic. "After this I can finely be with Comet Tail."

"I thought you said something about a Bonbon," I said as I blinked the spots from my eyes.

"Comet Tail's the stallion of her herd," she explained as she wound her camera for another picture. I did my best not to blink. "So... first question, which I'm sure every mare would love here about, Sir... why are you so thin?"

Damn it.