Heaven's Not Enough

Part III

Chapter 4 – December 13th, 2019

December 13th, 2019

Devil's Tower, WA (Population: 55)

After a morning of briefings and fortification orders, Eliza and Andy took immediate advantage of the frozen lake. They recruited for a shooting drill, and made use of a box of balloons that had been gathering dust in the storage room. A dozen volunteers stepped up, ready to defend their home.

Two of them were boys, each orphans, sixteen and seventeen, although they seemed most interested in just firing a gun. Another was the elderly Eunice, who was apparently a very well practiced dead eye with her hunting rifle.

"You think you're the only huntin' girl here, Eliza?" she had asked, with a toothy grin.

That was the funny thing about Concrete, something Eliza valued about it most of all. In her view, it's what set the town well above and beyond the rest of the Valley. Every man and woman was multi-talented to an incredible degree, usually in ways that surprised outsiders.

The long conveyor belt structure was an excellent firing range because it overlooked the lake. Andy and Eliza passed out sets of earplugs. At least a hundred balloons were scattered about at varying distances, bobbing around on the ice from the wind. Each had a small stone of ice inside, weighing them down just enough so that they didn't blow away too fast. The shooters had all trained on static targets in the field earlier that day. Now that their sights were dialed in, the budding militia used the flat lake to track small moving targets.

Eliza and Andy were driven. They spent quality time with every shooter, offered advice and suggestions. They praised their accomplishments, and encouraged them when they failed. A couple of Neo-Luddites – Hector, and a man Eliza knew from Rockport, named Tony – each joined them in the exercise. They both snapped off a few well aimed shots at some balloons 200 yards out just to show that they could. It gave the whole class a morale boost.

When all was said and done, it had been an hour, and only a dozen or so balloons were left. They were very, very far out of reach, abandoned by the class. Eliza saw them as an opportunity. Andy dismissed the class, and everyone shuffled out. Eliza was at the back of the line, and caught some of the conversation as she left.

Hector grimaced. "Well," he said. "They could be better."

"A lot of 'em haven't touched a gun in a while," Andy said defensively.

Eliza slipped her hand across Andy's back as she passed. "I'm heading up to the tower," she said. "Gonna try hitting the ones way out there."

Andy looked out one of the openings in the wall. "What. Those? You serious?"

She nodded.

Hector grinned. "Girl, if you can hit those, I've got a bottle of wine stashed away with your name on it."

She didn't want wine.

A minute later, she was up in her office. From inside, she pushed the door open and propped it with her tillering stick.

She laid out six spare Garand clips and a box of loose rounds by the doorway. She laid prone, half inside her office, half out, then took careful aim at the remaining balloons. They were each roughly the size of a deer's heart, and each hopped and bobbed along the ice as gusts of wind caught them.

Judging by the edges of the lake, she estimated the range to be about 600 yards. But with a target as small as a balloon and so far out, she had no way of knowing the true range.

She turned her sights on a tree far out on the lakeside. She fired a round at it. It landed low, as expected. She fired several times, and she adjusted her elevation between shots until the range was properly dialed.

Eliza again set her sights on the balloons. Her finger squeezed the trigger and her Garand kicked against her shoulder. A second later, she saw a splash of ice. She missed, and the balloon rocked to the left.

She adjusted her windage.

Her aim settled on a balloon of similar distance. She adjusted her elevation upward, aimed... then squeezed the trigger. Ice bursted. She knew she missed, but the balloon popped from the shards.

She settled on another balloon. This one moved slightly in the wind. She adjusted her elevation up, just a single click, and led the target. She sighted. She squeezed the trigger.

Miss. The sight was properly zeroed now, but she led the target too much.

Eliza tried again to hit the balloon, and the shot landed perfectly. She considered loading another clip, but decided against it. Any mistakes at all needed to be punished. She chambered a single round and closed the breach. She fired. She missed. She loaded another round. She fired. She missed. As the ice gave way to water from her shots, her targets became harder to hit.

Determination. That's all she needed. Nothing could conquer an indomitable spirit. She would try again and again. For a long time, Eliza thought of nothing but hitting her target. Training. Over and over again, until she got it right.

Slowly but surely, she started to pick off the balloons with fewer and fewer adjustments. She had felt no joy when she struck a balloon, seeing only more room for improvement. She had grown rusty over the months. Now, she sharpened her blade for the coming din, whatever it might be. She had to be perfect.

Her numerous enemies, as they circled in hunger, wouldn't give her another chance to practice.

She didn't want to fight the Army. She'd never advocate going out and looking for a fight. But if they had their backs to the wall, and they had no choice... that's what she'd do. If someone wanted to take her home, to take her family back within reach of Celestia, they'd have to fight and kill her for it. She'd lost enough family to that monster already.

For comfort, Eliza fantasized that there could be a place where she could lodge a bullet in some server somewhere that might kill Celestia. It was a naive, impossible notion, she thought, but it was cathartic. At the very least, if she spent just one bullet on each of her enemies, she could stave off hundreds. She certainly had enough ammunition. As precious as it was, now was the time to use it.

After Eliza ended the last balloon, she exhaled slowly. She looked upon the lake with new eyes, ones full of strength. Only then did she allow herself to feel any sort of accomplishment. She canted her rifle to the left and stared at the carved letters above the trigger guard on the right.

Apex.

Ever since the news of the nuke, the nightmares were coming back.

Apex had loved the forest, loved the animals in it, loved her family, loved her job, loved her friends. As Eliza remembered that perfect life, she felt only emptiness. Sugar Song devoured Gale. Apex had threatened to consume Eliza's soul next.

Killing that small part of Celestia was the closest Eliza had ever come to killing Celestia herself. Perhaps once, Eliza felt regret about it, but no longer. Eliza now considered the death of Apex as the first time she had ever killed someone, not that sniper who tried to kill her. Killing Apex was hard to do, perhaps one of the hardest things she'd ever done. But it absolutely needed to be done, of that Eliza had no doubt.

The same would be done to any poor bastard who would be stupid enough to try and take Eliza's friends and family away ever again. They were all sacred to her. Rob. June. Ralph. Andy. Even Mike. Her love for them was holy. To challenge it, to try to take them from her, was sacrilege. If she would have to take another life, it would only be in their defense. She might agree with the reasons of the Neo-Luddites, but wouldn't kill for their cause alone. She knew where her allegiances stood.

She laid there for a while and just stared out onto the lake, enjoying the chill. After a while, Eliza stored her clips. She took out another box of bullets, laid it beside her tillering stick, and retook her firing position. She needed more practice. She took aim at the base of a budding sapling across the water and decided to turn her aggression on the wild, untamed wilderness.

Mike sat on a folding chair on the roof down below, enjoying a small fire. He was waiting for Eliza.

"I bet you're a real crack shot nowadays," he said, as she approached from inside.

"I was a little out of practice, but I'm getting better," she whispered hoarsely, and cleared her throat. The taste of gunpowder clung to her.

Mike looked at her and frowned. "Douglas... we need to talk about something."

"Alright." She crossed her arms, leaned on the wall of her tower, and looked out at the lake.

"This training thing is crazy," he whispered quietly, so no one else would overhear. "You, all your people... you should just go. Pack up and leave. You'll all be shot for treason if you don't."

Eliza nodded to herself. "So you keep telling me," she said. "And I know. But I don't have a choice, Mike."

"There is. Load everyone up in a truck, and get out."

She shook her head. "Look. This isn't your fight, and you have a wife to get back to. I don't expect you to understand. These are my people, they depend on me. They don't want to leave, and I'm not leaving them behind. Look... if you want, we can go out to town together, and you can just disappear. You can keep the horse, head east."

"It's not about me. Think of the kids here," he pleaded.

"I am. I'm thinking about their future. I wasn't sure yesterday, but I'm more sure about this now than I ever was. I'm not letting our enemies take anyone else. Celestia, the Army, or the Ludds. I don't care what anyone says."

"Aren't you afraid to die?"

"I'm not afraid of death anymore," she muttered darkly. "I'm afraid that if I don't do something, I'll have to shovel graves for my parents."

Mike sighed. "You're right about one thing, this isn't my fight. I've been here long enough. I have my own people to get back to, Eliza."

"What about your parents?" she asked. "And what if Sandra decides to upload next? What'll you do then?"

"Then there's nothing I can do," Mike said.

Eliza scoffed.

"I know how you feel about it," he said. "But it's not my choice."

"And you? Will you follow her?"

Mike lowered his gaze to the concrete edge of the roof, frowning. "I don't know what I'll do. But I don't want to die here in Washington." He looked up at her again. "Let's face it, Eliza... this is a war. War changes things. Things change, remember?"

She stared at him for a while and just shook her head. "Just let me know when it's time for you to go, Mike. I'll take care of the rest."

"I'll miss you, Douglas," he said weakly.

"You're one of the best friends I've ever had, Mike, and you know I'm not the best at making friends anymore. I wish I could just leave too, trust me. But... my mind's made up. We each have our crosses to bear here."

"Yeah," Mike said, looking into the fire. "I guess we do."

Eliza looked off the roof and watched Hector and Tony set up a spool of barbed wire near the road. She looked back at Mike, who hadn't moved. She felt tired, and considered a nap. It'd be a well earned reward for a long training session, she reasoned. Eliza climbed up the tower back to her office, rolled into her cot, and let sleep take her.

Apex was dreaming again. She stood alone at the bottom of a mountain. She looked to her hooves. They were muddy. It was raining. She looked up the treacherous switchback. Apex knew what she needed to do. She began to climb. No more distractions. The mountain was endless as it sprawled upward to challenge the heavens.

Along the way, at a turn of the switchback, Apex saw Sugar Song. Sugar waited for her, and smiled. But Apex passed her. Sugar followed.

"Apex? Is something wrong?"

"Nothing's wrong, Sugar Song."

"Please, Apex, don't be like that. You're always there for me, you know I'm always here for you."

"Thank you," Apex said. "It means so much to me."

Sugar continued to follow Apex in silence. They climbed together for another eternity. The switchback turned into a spiral around the mountain. Along the way, Apex came across Hopscotch, who was coming back down. He beamed at his wife with glee, and Apex bumped muzzles in greeting as she neared him. But then, Apex continued on her way without a word.

"Apex? Hon? Hello?" Hopscotch fell behind. "Sugar Song, what's wrong with her?"

Her sister spoke. "I don't know, Hop. She's being strange."

"I have to see the top," Apex said stubbornly. "Please... I've been trying so hard."

Apex was followed by two of the most important ponies in her life as she undertook the most difficult task she's ever taken. The three climbed together.

An eternity passed in silence. Apex looked to the skyline as she walked, and there she saw two pegasi flying in formation with one another. Their keen eyes must have seen Apex, and the two ponies flew her way. It was Blue Sky and East Circle.

The pegasi smiled and landed before Apex. "Hey!" Blue Sky said cheerfully. "Everypony's here! Cool! We had some good news for you all, but... um, where are you all headed?" Apex passed right by them without a word.

East followed Apex on hoof, matching speed with her on one side. "Apex? Is something wrong?"

Apex ignored East especially. East wasn't family. Furthest from it. She wished she could remember why she didn't consider East family. She was such a sweet mare, and was so good to Blue Sky. Apex just didn't like her for some reason.

"Apex...?"

Blue Sky spoke quietly with Hopscotch for a moment. She could hear them talking about her. Then, Blue caught up on Apex's other side. "Sis, you know we'd never abandon you. Tell us, please. What's so important? We want to understand. Help us understand. You know we're always here for you."

Apex knew that was wrong, somehow. She couldn't remember why.

The five ponies continued their climb. In support of Apex, the pegasi closed their wings and walked.

Apex looked up. She was getting so incredibly close. This high up above the clouds, they escaped the rain. The clouds suddenly melted away, and all she could see was Equestria. It rolled out in all directions. The view was spectacular. The view was always spectacular. But she knew the view would be better at the summit. Apex continued to climb. Another eternity passed.

Ahead near the summit, Apex could see a golden aura. The air smelled so crisp. For a moment, Apex could almost believe the dream was real. Until this point, the dream moved Apex along beyond her control. But now, Apex found herself suddenly lucid. She could move on her own, and did so. Even with her newfound freedom, she had no desire but to continue what she came to do. To turn back would be to dishonor all the progress she'd made. She continued to climb.

"Apex." Hopscotch said. "Apex, come on back. It's getting dark."

"I don't mind, love," she said. "Don't you see the glow?"

She had to reach the aura. Her legs felt so light. Everyone behind her was panting with exhaustion. But Apex wasn't. She felt excitement. She was so close now... she had to reach the mountaintop. She was determined like she'd never been determined before.

The path switchbacked. Suddenly, she heard no hoofsteps but her own. She turned, and saw her family still standing there at the turn.

"Apex," Hopscotch pleaded. "We can't go any further. We need to go back."

Sugar called out. "Apex, please! It's too cold!"

"C'mon, sis!" Blue cried. "The wind is too strong!"

Apex considered returning, and took one step back down toward them. "Please... don't leave me. Don't go. I'm sorry. I... I need you all. I realize that now. I couldn't have made it this far without you!"

She looked back up the mountain, and she hoped they would be drawn by the glow too. She hoped it would help convince them to stay. "Look. Don't you see it? Just look—!" Apex turned back to her family, and... they were gone. All of them. Apex peered over the edge back down the path she had taken. Their hoofprints were gone, too. There was only one set of prints. They were all hers.

Apex desperately wanted to look for them, but she had no choice but to continue. So she continued alone. The penultimate leg of the switchback was so incredibly painful. She steeled herself and began to pant, as if all the exertion from the climb suddenly crushed her all at once. She forced herself forward. It was a struggle unlike any she'd ever endured.

She reached the final turn and collapsed. Apex lifted her eyes to the heavens, looking for help.

The aura was coming. It blinded her with its radiance. And as it drew near, it came into focus. Finally, Apex could see what she sought. But the heavenly aura was tainted. It was Celestia. There she stood, wings outstretched, wearing the stolen colors of God. She had not just one horn, but two, each curled like a ram's. Celestia wore the soft, fake smile of the Devil, and harbored the false compassion of the Serpent.

With great effort, Apex forced herself to stand. She readied herself for confrontation. She pushed forward through the pain. She withdrew her bow, and she nocked an arrow.

Eliza awoke with a jolt, and felt the sweat upon her brow despite the cold. Her rifle was on her back, weighing her down in her bed. She took a deep breath, exhaled, and swept her tongue through her mouth to help herself wake up.

She looked at the window in the door of her office. It was bright out, the sun cutting through the cloud layer and gleaming through the window. Eliza sat up. She panted as she recalled her nightmare, so vivid and real. Then she slammed her foot roughly against the wall in anger with a grunt. The dream always dominated the senses. She hated it so much.

Eliza came back down the ladder as soon as she was awake again, and stretched at the bottom. Judging by the sunlight, it seemed to have only been a few hours. The camp was quiet despite an increased presence in the courtyard. Eliza noted that there were more folks manning the walls, and she was willing to bet that there were more people doing patrols than normal. A response to the news and training, no doubt. Everyone was on edge.

Eliza walked up to the wall where Andy was talking quietly to Mike.

Ralph walked in through the gate, scowling. He moved toward Andy, then saw Eliza and waved her over. "Just got done grilling Sam," he said quietly. "The fuckin' fool just let Rob leave by himself. Rob said he needed some time alone."

"What?" Eliza bristled with anger. "That idiot! Why didn't he stop him! He knows it's not safe to go out—!"

Ralph cut her off. "I gave him the same lecture, Lizzie. Your old man wouldn't take no for an answer."

"That's precisely the reason he should've stopped him," she growled. "I'm gonna wring Sam's neck."

Mike cut in. "Douglas, he took a horse. I got my gear, I'll come help you find him." He started toward the gate.

Eliza grabbed him by the sleeve. "Mike, no. Things can get real bad out there, especially right now. We don't know when the military might roll in."

He looked her over in consideration, then shook his head. "I'm coming with. I still owe you one, right? And if I'm leaving today, I won't get another chance to pay you back. It'll be just like one of our search and rescue calls."

Ralph frowned. "You should bring him. With any luck, Rob's just down at the church again. We'd go with you too, Lizzie, but with the way things are now, the camp comes first."

"Yeah, I get it. Keep everyone at the ready. We'll bring Dad back safe, don't worry."

"I know you will, little lady. Good luck out there."

She stopped just before she left the gate. Eliza felt her gut twist up with panic, and she looked back to Ralph. "Does... does Mom know?"

Ralph sighed. "Not yet. I'm about to go tell her. You best get going now so I'll have something positive to tell her."

She nodded rapidly, and Mike went with her to the stables. They mounted up together and rode off as fast as their horses could go.

They stormed across the Thompson bridge together, and Eliza called over to Mike as they crossed into Concrete. She pointed at the buildings of Main Street. "You check right, I'll get the left!"

"Got it!"

They each scanned their own side of Main Street as they passed by, and slowed their horses to a trot. The great beasts panted. They weren't used to running so much, as of late.

"Clear right," Mike said, as they cleared the street. "You?"

"Nothing different left," she called back, as her mount staggered. "I'll check the house. You remember the way back?"

"Yeah," he said.

"Good! Go check the church, just downhill. The blue one, not the other one. That's where he was at last!" Mike nodded, and they both bolted west. Eliza broke off.

She scanned for any potential activity on the highway as she traveled along it. Her house wasn't far. She hopped off her mount at the driveway and quickly tied the reins around her mailbox. She also noticed Mike's car, its windows freshly shattered. As Eliza passed, she recognized that the radio inside had been riddled with holes. The trunk had been pried open, and the car looked like it had been searched. The tires had all been slashed.

For just a moment, Eliza hesitated. There could be more squatters. The road was active, after all. For safety, she drew her sidearm, then she swept and cleared her own home rapidly, with a finely machined, tactical proficiency.

The living room. The kitchen. The hall. Tom's room. Gale's room. Her own room. Her mother and father's room. The garage. All clear. Not a soul. Eliza jogged back to the front door. Then, before exiting, a thought stopped her dead cold.

Tom and Gale's bedrooms were open when she came in. They had been closed when she found Mike there. No matter what a looter might have done to Mike's car, no looter would have gone inside her home and opened specifically those doors. A chill ran down Eliza's spine, and she quickened her pace.

She moved out of the house and began to look for footprints and hoofprints in the snow. The snow was light enough that the road was clear and slick, and the blacktop could be seen, but the thin outline of hooves was visible in the black ice. She looked back toward Main Street. The hoofprints had approached the house, stopped at the mailbox, and headed west to Route 20. She mounted up again and followed the trail.

If he was leaving town to the west, and not east...

She didn't even want to think about that. He had been talking about Tom and Gale. She sorely hoped she was wrong about what his intentions were.

She powered westward and forgot Mike. Her father could be long gone by now, and she didn't have time to wait around. Eliza kept her eyes locked onto her father's trail, lest she lose it. Tracking at high speeds was difficult, but in the snow, everything became easier for her.

The trail of hooves went on for almost two whole kilometers, and stayed just out of sight of the main road. Eliza hoped it would stop soon. As she tracked, the trail veered south off the road, in the direction of the town's cemetery. That brought her some relief. But not much.

"Come on, Dad."

Eliza slowed her horse to a trot as she entered this neighborhood of her town, and she remained alert for any other people. Even in this emergency situation, she was worried she'd run into another squatter. Worse, she feared her father would encounter a Neo-Luddite scout, curious about why Rob was off on his own. She could always explain her own presence, but she doubted he could do the same. She swept her gaze around at the hills and homes as she rode.

She was closer to him than she thought. Suddenly, Eliza saw her father very far ahead on the road. His light gray horse was moving slow. Eliza's breath caught, and she drove her own horse hard left between two houses so he wouldn't see her.

Eliza considered for a moment. She knew his destination, or at least had a pretty good guess. She couldn't think of any other reason he had come out this far. But if he was trying to flee camp and she ran right up to him, he'd take off on his horse and she'd never be able to stop him. She dismounted and followed him on foot, using the homes as concealment.

Her father knew she knew how to track. He had taught her himself. If Rob suspected Eliza had found his trail and he intended to run, she'd lose him forever. She moved cautiously as she jogged on the opposite side of the homes, parallel to Rob's path.

Before long, Eliza approached the tall outer fence of the cemetery. As she rounded the last house, she saw Rob's horse tied off to the front gate on the east side. Tom and Gale's memorial grave stones faced west, so that's how she would approach, because Rob would be facing east. Swiftly, Eliza moved clockwise along the outside wall of trees to the west side. Eliza slowed to peer through the white slats of the perimeter fence. She could see her father hunched over the two graves. He was on his knees.

Her heart rate spiked.

Eliza found the gate on her side, and she undid the latch as quietly as humanly possible, the effort masked by the light wind. The lock had old rusty cut marks on it, long broken. Once through the gate, she crept forward, delicately moving through the snow to Rob. She tried her best to steady her breathing, but found herself so afraid of the confrontation that she couldn't help but pant a little.

Memories flickered in her mind of midnight tiptoeing down the hall, fearful of waking her parents on her way to grab a midnight snack from the fridge. The stakes were a little higher this time, she thought darkly.

As she approached, she heard her father speaking. He was blubbering something she couldn't understand, so distraught as he was. It was heartbreaking for her. She'd never seen him at such a low before. Eliza inched her way closer. It was like climbing the mountain in her dream, the journey becoming more difficult with every step. Every step was more dangerous than the last. Everything rode on this moment.

The snow crunched quietly underfoot. Ten yards. She couldn't get any closer without spooking him.

She made her stand.

"Dad?"

Her father stopped groveling and froze stiff. "Elizabeth," he said weakly. He didn't turn.

"It's time to come home," she said consolingly, the voice she had once used to comfort a crying Tom.

He shuddered. The bitterness and anguish in his voice shocked her, as he spoke through clenched teeth. He sounded like an entirely different person. "I've been back home. I didn't like what I saw there."

Her heart broke. "Dad, please don't do this. You're dwelling. It's what she wants."

"Like you aren't dwelling, too?" He stood and faced her, his face twisted with misery. "Like you don't dwell every single day. I saw the look in your eyes as we crossed town the other day. Don't tell me you're okay with this war." He shouted at her next. "Don't tell me you want to fight the Army!"

She flinched, and blinked. "I—I don't want to..."

He stared her down. "But you're training everyone for war!"

"It's how we keep them safe. It's how the world is now, it's the only way. You know it is!"

He lowered his gaze as well as his tone, and he returned his eyes to the graves. "I miss my family. Honestly, Elizabeth. My wife and I barely talk anymore. I can't relate to my brother anymore, either. And you? You've changed." He looked to her again. "The daughter I raised wouldn't be doing this."

"I don't want to," she whispered, taking a step forward. "But we don't have a choice, we—"

"There's always a choice!" he snapped. "You can leave! We can all leave, but you keep clinging to the town, even though there's nothing for us here anymore. Listen. Come with me, Elizabeth. We can leave here together. We can find a place where it's safe, where we don't have to fight. But if you stay here, those terrorists will lead you all to ruin."

"So you just want to leave Mom? Abandon her?"

"Just like Ralph. June made her choice," Rob said quietly. "I asked her to leave with me this morning. She said no. Said she wouldn't leave you."

Eliza didn't know that. She frowned. "I'm not leaving Mom either. Not Ralph, not Andy. I'll die before I do that to them. They aren't losing any more family, especially not me. I promised myself I'd never do that to you all, that I'd never do what Tom and Gale did, and I won't let you do that to them either."

"It makes not one difference whether I'm there or not. Except that if you stay, you'll die, Elizabeth. And if I stay, I have to watch everyone I love die. Don't make me do that."

She felt herself tremble in fear. "Where will you even go?"

Rob drew in a steady breath, and let it out, shaking. He placed a hand on Tom's gravestone, and stared sadly at Eliza.

It took her a long moment to comprehend. Her wide eyes locked onto her father's.

"No," she breathed, shaking her head, not believing it. "Don't you dare. Don't..."

"If you won't come with me, they'll be the the only family I'll have left. You'll all be dead, and I'll be left with nothing."

She blinked at him. "We aren't leaving them, Dad. They can't survive losing anyone else! And you'll kill Mom with the grief!"

His voice lowered to a mumble. "You aren't listening to me anymore," he said. "Not like you used to." He looked sadly over his shoulder at the open front gate.

"Don't," she begged, trembling. "Don't go."

His eyes didn't leave the gate. "I'm going, whether you like it or not. Are you going to stop me?"

"If I have to," she cried. But she wasn't sure. Her voice shook, her hands shook.

"My daughter wouldn't have the heart to do it." He met her eyes again. "If you don't want me to upload, then come with me. I need family. I can't live without it. It's what I live for. But if you stay, it's my only other choice. I'm sorry, but I've thought this through. I love you, Elizabeth. I always will." He turned and started to walk away.

If you love something, set it free...

"No..." She took several deep hiccuping breaths to try and calm herself, and cringed as she failed. "It's all falling apart. All of it." Rob continued back to his horse. "We'll fall apart without you!"

Unbidden, Gale's voice came to mind. You said I'm your favorite sister. I'm your only sister.

"We can't do this without you, Dad!" She followed, matching his pace as he ignored her. "You're abandoning us! Just like they did! Don't do this to us!"

Come on, Liz! Get cool! Tom's voice.

"Tom and Gale never stopped to think what they were doing to us," she wailed, as the memory of losing them tore at her. "Dad, please! I don't know how we can make it if you leave! Don't make me stop you!"

Farewell, my strong and beautiful friend. George.

Her father walked on. He was almost to his horse.

She shouted with agony. "Stop!" He ignored her. "Dad, please! Don't go!"

She began to pant as he reached to untie the reins, and she clutched her hair with both hands. If he mounted his horse, she knew she would never see him again. She had to do something. Anything. And fast, or she would lose her father forever.

There was only one way that would keep him there for sure. At the very notion of the idea, it took control. Her body moved almost on its own. Without thinking through the consequences, Eliza sidestepped twice. She drew her handgun. She leveled it past Rob's shoulder, and pointed it at the gray horse.

Her soul cried out wildly for her to stop.

Her gun bucked three times. The horse whinnied aloud and tried to rear desperately away as the hollow point rounds pierced its heart. Rob turned sharply with a wince. With a earth-quaking thud, the animal collapsed in the snow on its side. It drew long, agonal breaths as it bled out, its reins clung to the gate stubbornly, and its head craned to the sky as it let out a dry, final breath.

Her father flinched as Eliza leveled the gun at him next. "You aren't leaving us," she moaned, tear-stricken, hardly able to believe what she had just done. She was losing control again... had lost control. She was committed now. Her hands shook wildly, almost like she was possessed. "I'm s-sorry. I'm not letting you go."

He raised his hands, more a placation than surrender. He looked at her now not with shock or fright, but with disappointment. "If you're going to shoot me, Elizabeth... then my daughter is well and truly dead."

"I don't want to shoot you, Dad. I want to bring you home." Every word was more painful than the last. She remembered her handcuffs. "Turn around. Hands on your head. Make this easy for us both."

"No." He lowered his hands slowly. Her eyes darted to where his holster should be, but she finally realized he wasn't carrying it. He was unarmed.

"Dad. I'm keeping you safe. If you go out there alone, to the west, you'll die. Someone on the road will cut you down, you won't even make it to an upload clinic. Coming home is the only way. It's the safest way. I'm trying to protect you!"

"Protect me?!" He began to shout again. "I'd rather brave the road on foot than watch my family and neighbors die for a lost cause! Concrete isn't worth dying for! You're all everything to me, but if I can't have my family here, or any sense of normalcy, then...!" He clenched his fists. His cheeks were wet. "Please, Elizabeth. Let me have this. Come with me."

She bared her teeth and screamed at him with sudden, desperate rage. "You started me down this path, Dad! You, who told us uploading was death! You! You God damned hypocrite! I wanted to keep playing the game! I wanted to follow Tom and Gale! But I stayed here! For you! I gave everything! For you! I trusted you!" She gulped painfully and tightened her grip on her pistol. "I'm not letting you hurt us all like Tom and Gale and George did! I'll shoot you in the leg and drag you back, if I have to!" She was panting. Her head ached.

Rob eyed her gun, frowning. His voice was soft. "You and I both know that's a forty-five, and you load hollowpoints. I wouldn't survive it."

"I'll take the chance!"

He looked up into her eyes sadly and called her bluff. "So will I, because I know you wouldn't do it. You love me too much."

As he turned, something tore within her. And then, another voice came to her, one she hadn't expected...

You may not be like us yet, Isaiah had told her. But one day, you'll be sick of losing people.

And suddenly, she understood.

Eliza tossed her gun to the snow and charged her father. She tackled him to the ground, forcing him into the white snow beside the bleeding horse. Rob struggled beneath her, trying to break free. She reached for the cuffs on her utility belt. She had youth, she had strength, and she had training. Most of all, she was determined.

"Eliza! Stop!"

She ignored him, fighting painfully through her remorse and guilt, blinking away the tears. She had to be strong. She snapped a cuff on one of his wrists and reached for the other. Rob twisted his free arm up and tried to bury it beneath himself. "This is for your own good," she cried, hating herself for what she was doing, but she thought of her mother, imagined her grief, and Eliza's heart hardened painfully. "Stop! Stop fighting me, Dad! I don't want to hurt you!" She heard the stampeding sound of hooves, and looked up through the gate in fright. She almost thought she had heard a woman's voice, but she was relieved to see Mike instead. He launched himself from his horse and ran in their direction, glancing at Rob's dead horse.

"Douglas! I heard shots, what happened!?"

"Thank God," she called. "Mike, help me!" She looked back down to her father, and tried to wrangle his other arm. He was laying on it now, and refused to give it over. She desperately tried to pry it back out. "He was trying to—"

Eliza's breath caught. Something was wrong; as soon as Mike reached her, her head jerked to the right, unbidden. Something had struck her, and she suddenly felt her arms go limp. Her father broke free, Eliza's world began to spin, and the snow rushed up to meet her.

Author's Note

[Trocadero - Soul Clef XI]

🌒 ~ Your grace and mercy, on this day. Once again, Ser Knight of the Moon... I must express my eternal gratitude, for what you have done. Thine wings, name, and title are well earned.

🗡️ ~ You know I couldn't let it happen to either of them, Luna.

🌒 ~ Nevertheless.

Friday. December 13th, 2019.
The day of Judas Iscariot.

So begins the end.