My Little Proletariat

Twilight took off at a gallop towards the barn. Applejack was taken by surprise. "Hey," she yelled, "wait up! Y'don't actually think it's-oh, horseapples." She started after her friend.

They arrived at the barn about the same time. Twilight was panting, sweat covering her flanks. She looked up at the body, and then glared at Applejack from below her fringe.

"It's a model," she said.

"What the hell did you think it was? Y'think I'd drag you out here in secret if a real pony'd offed themselves in my barn? I'd be on the Mayor's doorstep in a heartbeat!"

"You could have said something!"

"Hey!" Applejack stomped a hoof. "Somepony is goin' around hangin' mannequins of ponies in my barn! It's not the sort of thing I want to make known!"

Twilight took a breath. "OK," she said. "OK. Blame later. Let's have a look at this."

"Can't we just, I dunno, take it down?" Applejack asked.

Twilight squinted up at the hanging body. "There could be clues. I've read about them." She turned to the earth pony. "When were you last in here?"

"Well, I ain't been in here for a few days, but Big Mac would've put his stuff away in here last night, an' he never mentioned anything."

"So whoever did this must have done it while the party was going on." She paused, thinking. "Where would you get a mannequin at short notice?"

"I.....dunno. Rarity's, I guess?"

"Well, it took quarter of an hour for us to run from the library to here, and I saw Rarity in the middle of the party. I guess she could have shown up, raced back to Carousel Boutique, grabbed the required mannequin, dashed over here and strung it up...but that doesn't sound like her."

"Can we just take the thing down, Twi?"

Twilight held out a hoof. "No, wait."

There was silence in the barn as Twilight examined the mannequin further. Applejack waited impatiently.

"How would you get this thing down?" Twilight asked.

Applejack looked at the unicorn. "Well, I'd get a crate and untie it."

"Hah! A crate!"

"That's...what I said."

"And where's the nearest crate?"

"Well, there's plenty in the corner over here..." said Applejack, trotting over.

Twilight beat her there. Holding out a hoof, she inspected the tops of the crates. "Ah, but these crates are all dusty!" she proclaimed.

Applejack blinked. "Yes," she said. "That's what happens when you put crates in a barn."

"But if someone had moved these crates, they wouldn't be dusty!"

"So you're saying whoever strung this up didn't use a crate?"

"Exactly! Oooh, this is like puzzles!"

Applejack glared at Twilight.

"...except much, much more serious. Of course."

Applejack sighed. "Yes, very good. Now, can we get 'round to taking it down?"

They dragged one of the old crates out to under the hanging mannequin. At one point, according to the faded paint on its side, it has contained "BRONCO SOAP", which it promised was "strong enough to clean the whole herd!" Twilight got the job of untying the pony, which mainly involved her balancing on top of the box while she attempted to untie the knots holding it up. It wasn't easy.

"Whoever tied this was using their hooves," she commented. "If you were using magic, you could knot this much tighter-"

"Twi, sweetie, could we not talk about the pony who's sending death threats to me an' mine?"

"Uh, sure, I guess!" Twilight was still focussed on getting the knots untied. "What do you want to talk about? How's Big Mac?"

The earth pony sighed. "Y'sure know how to pick your subjects, don't you?"

"...oh, right. I guess that's a touchy subject. Sorry. Ah, finally!" A purple glow enveloped the mannequin as it came free of the noose. Carefully, she lowered the model to the ground.

"Naw, I guess it's OK. I mean, it's not like it's a secret that they Mayor wants a piece o' my brother." Applejack sighed, guiding the mannequin onto the barn's floor. "She paid him extra to deliver that cider to her party, like I thought. The big lummox said it didn't matter much to him who looked at his behind, and we needed the bits. He's got a point, but that don't make me happy about it."

Twilight got down off the crate. "Why're you telling me this?" she asked. "I mean, I don't want to sound horrible or anything, but I've only been in town a few days and now you're telling me about...well, about family business that you probably don't want aired all over the town."

Applejack nudged the mannequin with a forehoof. "Well, y'seem like a trustworthy type, is all," she said. "Besides, I'm supposed t' be the Element of Honesty, right?

Twilight smiled. "And I guess there was also the time we saved the world from eternal night together. That's like a trust-building exercise."

"Yeah, and that."

Silence.

Twilight cleared her throat. "Well," she said, "we should probably check the body."

It didn't take them long to find the three-diamond mark of Rarity's Carousel Boutique on the inner leg of the mannequin. Applejack was all for confronting her right away before she could clear up the evidence, until Twilight pointed out that first, it would be rather stupid of Rarity to implicate herself by using her own mannequin to do the act, and second, they might want to remove the hangman's noose that still took pride of place in the barn.

"So," said Applejack, keeping her forehooves on the crate to keep it steady. "What was it you wanted to talk about yesterday?"

Twilight paused, hanging onto the noose with one hoof for balance. She kept having irrational thoughts about slipping and falling, the noose tightening around her fetlock until she was hanging from one forehoof, and then having to live with one unnaturally-stretched leg for the rest of her life. As irrational fears went, she'd had worse; it was still off-putting.

"Oh," she said. "I remember! Technology."

"Technology?"

"Yes!" Twilight turned back to the knots in the rope, horn glowing as she tried to unthread them. She'd never been really good at this sort of ultra-fine control, and something about this knot in particular bothered her. "You don't seem to have much machinery on the farm, which always confused me, because even if you got a relatively inexpensive tractor or something, Granny Smith could do the driving and you could probably increase your output about two-fold."

Applejack's eyes narrowed. "Twi, y'aren't seriously suggesting we start using technology on the farm, are you?"

"Why not?" The unicorn focussed, and the end of the rope came clear of the knot. She fell down onto all fours, grabbed the bottom of the noose in her teeth, and pulled. "Ick's erfecly afe."

"I guess y'don't understand, bein' a unicorn an' all," Applejack said. "Ponyville's an earth pony town, and we do things the earth pony way. That means no magic. It just causes problems, is all."

Twilight gave one last tug, and the rope came free. It dropped to the floor behind her. She turned to the earth pony. "I'm not saying you need to use magic. Tractors aren't magic. Tools aren't magic."

"Twi, I don't think-"

"I understand that you don't want to use magic. We don't need everypony to be dependent on unicorns. I don't want everypony to depend on the unicorns. We tried that, and it failed horribly! But we can make things now, things that don't need magic to function. Anypony can drive a tractor. Anypony can...I don't know, operate an apple-picker. The point is, you don't need us to live better lives!"

"Twi, just because you put some trappings and gears around it, don't stop it being magic."

Twilight stamped a hoof on the crate. "It's not magic! Magic is waving a hoof and suddenly your pumpkin is a carriage, or, or levitating things using the force of your mind. It doesn't make sense, that's why it's magic. If it were reasonable we'd be doing it all the time and wouldn't have vast libraries with books of spells and how to perform them and have ponies poring over them for years before they're allowed to do anything more complex than simple lifting and carrying, and, and-"

"Hey, hey, simmer down. I didn't mean anything by it. It's just that, well, magic, and its ilk-" she shot a glare at Twilight, silencing her before she could even start to interrupt, "- tends to make things more complicated than it need be."

"But technology isn't magic! You just observe what happens and you apply it to your life."

"But how d'you make all them parts for your technological devices?" Applejack asked, holding up a hoof.

"Well, we machine them-"

"And how d'you make those machines?"

"Some are made on other machines, and some of them are constructed by unicorns-"

"And what do the unicorns use to make those parts?"

Twilight sighed. "I suppose they use magic-"

Applejack shrugged. "See? It's magic at some point. And magic complicates things."

Twilight closed her eyes. Getting mad doesn't solve anything, she thought to herself, and I wouldn't know where to hide an earth pony body out here even if it did.

She opened her eyes. "Let's just get the mannequin back to Rarity's, shall we?"

Carousel Boutique was closed when they visited, but the door was unlocked.

"Rarity?" Applejack called. "Rarity, you 'round?"

"Coming!"

They waited nervously just inside the door. Applejack tried not to touch anything, in case Rarity charged her for it. Twilight mentally reorganised the bolts of cloth lying behind the counter. The mannqeuin just sat there.

Rarity appeared at the top of the stairs. "Applejack! Darling! And Twilight! How nice of you two to pop round." She started down the stairs. "You'll have to excuse me, there's been a small hiccup with some of my stock. I was just sorting things out."

"Missing a mannequin, are you?" asked Twilight.

Rarity paused. "Why, yes, as a matter of fact." She looked past them, to the model leaning against the door. "Oh, you found it! How wonderful." She trotted down the last few steps and started to inspect the dummy. "Simply ghastly," she continued as she looked it over. "Someone broke in last night while I was at the party. They left everything else alone, like this was all they were after. Most strange." Her horn glowed, and the mannequin gently lifted into the air, rotating slowly in front of her. "Oh dear, just look at these grass stains. Where was it?"

"Hangin' from a noose in my barn," said Applejack, pointedly.

Rarity's expression changed from concern to shock. "Oh, you poor dear! Someone put that in your barn? You-" she paused, looking out the window. She lowered her voice, "You don't think they meant it? As a threat?"

Applejack gave the unicorn a level look. "I'm willing to entertain that notion."

"But who would do such a thing? In Ponyville, of all places! I'd never expect that sort of barbarism this close to Canterlot."

"That's what I'd like to figure out," said Twilight. "I don't suppose we could see the scene of the break-in?"

Twilight Sparkle was living a scene from a book.

Rarity had brought them up to her "creative space", as she called it. The room was strewn with various dresses and other garments in mixed states of completion. The chaos of Rarity's design process contrasted in what was doubtlessly a thought-provoking manner with the chaos caused by a forced entry and the theft of a dressmaker's model from the middle of the room, which probably reflected on the inner brutatlity of the modern pony or possibly the animalism of the creative process or something like that.

"...didn't even pay attention to the quality of the ruffle," continued Rarity. "I mean, the train I could understand, I just used whatever's around, it's just a prototype you see, but really? I make a seven-fold ruffle and the ruffian just throws it to the ground?" She turned to Twilight. "You can see we're dealing with the lowest of the low here."

Twilight tuned her out (it was surprisingly easy to do) and examined the room. Glass littered the wooden floor near the wall. The intruder had broken a pane to lift the latch, obviously. Against the opposite wall, three mannequins stood side-by-side. There was space for another, but all that was left were a pile of clothes.

"And this was exactly how you found it?" Twilight asked.

"Yes," said Rarity scathingly, "I just left fine-grade raw silk to gather dust on the floor." She sniffed dismissively.

"You moved something? That could have been key evidence! The thief would have put their hoofprints all over that dress!"

Applejack scratched the back of her neck. "We all got hooves, darling. What of it?"

"Well, they'd....I....I don't know! But I feel it's important somehow." She sighed. This wasn't how it went. There should be a clue, something she could find.

She looked around the room. "OK," she said, "how about the window?"

She trotted over to the window and gave it an experimental push. It gave a creak as it opened.

Twilight craned her neck. "Ah! No roof below the window," she said. "Looks like our thief is a pegasus."

"Couldn't you magic your way up here?" Applejack asked, still standing by the door.

"There's a few things you definitely can't do with magic. One of them is lifting yourself up by your own horseshoes. I guess it could be two unicorns..."

Rarity looked up from the pile of clothes she was rearranging. "Dear, you don't really think unicorns would do this to poor Applejack, do you?"

Twilight flashed Rarity an annoyed glance. "I'm sure unicorns are as capable of threats as anyone," she said coldly.

"Really, sometimes I'm surprised-"

"So, uh, anyway," said Applejack. "I guess they'll be expecting me on the farm now, what with the rest of my family not knowing about the hanging pony in my barn."

"Oh, yeah," said Twilight. Rarity shot her a glare, obviously not finished. "Don't worry, I'll keep on the case. And, uh, what I said before about the farm..."

"Yeah?"

"...just have a think about it? Please?"

The earth pony gave Twilight a considering look. "I guess I can at least do that for you. But no promises, OK?"

"Sure!" said the unicorn with a grin.

Rarity and Twilight watched each other as Applejack clumped down the stairs and left the shop. The bell jangled as the front door swung closed.

"So," said Twilight.

"So," said Rarity. "You're not just here about the mannequin, are you?"

Twilight started to inspect the window again. "Well, I was planning on it only being about the mannequin, but apparently you want to make it about something else." That came out wrong. "I mean, there are other things I want to talk to you about, but I think finding the ponies who broke into your boutique and threatened Applejack is more important than personal matters."

"Of course," said Rarity. She started to move about the room, re-hanging garments. "How thoughtful of you."

Hold on, Twilight thought, moments ago she was glaring at me like I'd killed her cat. She continued to examine the glass. "So, uh, what was it you wanted to talk about?"

"You didn't come talk to me last night after the party," said Rarity. Twilight could tell she was pouting just from the voice. How did she do that?

"No," Twilight replied. "I had other things to deal with. And, to be honest, quite a bit of last night is still a bit fuzzy."

"Of course," said Rarity, "of course. Listen, Twilight, darling, I know it's difficult living in Ponyville, I mean, look at you, always so stressed." She walked over to the window, beside Twilight. "You need somewhere you can relax, somewhere you can...be yourself."

Twilight looked up. Rarity was looking straight at her. This was starting to get unnerving. "Be myself? I'm not quite-"

Rarity put a hoof against Twilight's mouth. She smiled. "Darling, being a unicorn isn't the only thing we have in common."

Twilight blinked. She narrowed her eyes and batted the hoof away. "Oh no," she said, "you don't get to do that. Of all ponies, you don't get to do that."

"I...what?"

"'Oh, I'm Rarity, I'm going to make intimations about who other ponies sleep with and gossip behind their backs, and it doesn't matter because they're not the superior race! And then I'm going to lure the new unicorn in town to my place and make advances on her!'"

"That's not at all-"

"Really, Rarity? Because that's alarmingly what it looks like from here. Why, what should it look like?"

"It's-" Rarity started, but even as she said it she changed her mind. She hung her head. "I'm sorry, Twilight. I've been...indelicate. I thought...coming from Canterlot and all, well, you hear what ponies who come from there think. I was hoping I could get on your good side." She looked up at Twilight. "I was hoping you'd notice me."

Her fellow unicorn refused to meet her gaze.

The two stood in silence. Minutes passed. The sun shone in through the window, illuminating the dust that drifted around the room.

Finally, Twilight turned. "Rarity," she said, "what you've done, I don't care why you did it, it was wrong. It was mean, it was hurtful, and it's not what a friend would do."

"I know."

"I have to go help Applejack with her problem," Twilight said, walking to the staircase. "I'm sure you'll be able to fix your window. I'll see you around."

Rarity waited until Twilight had reached the door at the bottom of the stairs before speaking. "Twilight?" she asked.

"Yes?"

"...are we still friends?"

Twilight sighed. "I don't know. I-" She paused, one hoof on the front door, and sighed. "I don't know."

A moment of silence. Then the bell jangled as Twilight opened the door and left. As soon as she left, Rarity looked up from the floor. She didn't look half as morose now as she had done moments before.

"Oh no," she said to herself, "oh no oh no oh no! Rarity, what have you doo-ooone?!"

And then there was a ring of the bell as she, too, exited the store as fast as she could, and galloped towards the edge of Ponyville.

Twilight Sparkle cantered away from Carousel Boutique, mind spinning. She'd gone there to investigate a crime, nothing more, and now Rarity had complicated things by well, by being Rarity. Now she had to worry about mixed signals and, well, whatever there was between Rarity and Rainbow Dash, and had everything Rarity had said to her since she'd met her been some sort of double-entendre?

And she still needed to work out who'd stolen the mannequin in the first place.

There was one pony who could help her with both these problems.

It took her a good half-hour of searching, but eventually she found what she was looking for. Just off the main squre of Ponyville was a wide avenue. If you followed it far enough, you'd reach Canterlot. At this point, however, it was merely one of the many roads that met at the town's centre. Trees lined its length, and halfway out of town, a particularly large oak dominated its siblings. It was tall and bushy, bedecked in the summer green of lush leaves and immature acorns. Most importantly for Twilight, there was a rustling coming from one of the lower branches.

"...so anyway," said the oak tree as she approached, "then they turn to the earth pony, and both of them are all, 'OK, show us what you've got!' So the earth pony picks up a third brick-"

"Oh my," replied the oak tree, in a different voice.

"Hey, this is my joke. So the earth pony picks up a brick and he bucks it as hard as he can, and they all watch it go up, up, into the clouds. And none of them see it land."

"...that's, that's a very good joke, Rainbow Dash."

"No it isn't!"

"Isn't it? I'm sorry."

Twilight gave the trunk a swift kick. "Hey!" she called out. "Anypony up there?"

There was a rustling, and a sky-blue head poked out from the leaves. "Oh," said Rainbow Dash, "hey Twilight! Have you heard my joke yet?"

There was a rustling further along the branch, and Fluttershy's head emerged from the foliage. "It's very good," she added.

"Maybe later. Look, you girls, you know Rarity, right?"

The two pegasi exchanged glances. "Yeah," said Rainbow Dash. "I guess we know her. What's up?"

"I think she just tried to proposition me."

In the end, the pegasi joined Twilight on the ground rather than have her try to climb the tree and risk all manner of falling injury. If ponies were meant to climb trees, Twilight figured, Celestia would have given them opposable thumbs.

"And she just asked you out of the blue?" Rainbow Dash asked her.

"Well, yes. It wasn't like we were there on a social visit."

"Why were you there?"

"AJ-" Twilight checked herself. "Well, it's Applejack's business, I probably shouldn't be the one talking about it."

"I didn't even know she...well, liked mares," said Fluttershy.

"Me neither," said Twilight. "Actually, I was kind of hoping you'd know something about it, Dash,"

"Huh? Why the hell would I know anything about it? Rarity and I hang out, like, once in forever."

"Well, ah..." Twilight looked at her hooves. Why was this so hard to say? "Rarity kind of let slip about, uh, who you like this one time, and I kind of assumed that-"

"Oh," said Rainbow Dash, looking at Twilight. She wasn't smiling any more. "I get it. Just because I like flying and sports and work out and because Rarity implies things, that means I must obviously fool with fillies in my spare time, huh?"

"What? No! But...wait, you don't?"

Dash stood up, wings flared. "One, since when has it been your business, and two, even if I was, you just assume I'd sleep with any mare in Ponyville who'd have me?"

"Dash-"

"No, I see you've got important work to do. I guess I better go and find someone to sleep with."

"Dash, I didn't mean-"

"I'm sure you didn't. See you 'round, Fluttershy." The pegasus launched off towards town.

Twilight stared after her.

"Bother," she said.

"Um, Twilight?"

Twilight turned back to the remaining pegasus. "Sorry for ruining your free time, Fluttershy."

"Oh, it's not your fault. You just hit a sore spot with Rainbow Dash. Lots of ponies think that when they meet her. I'm sure everything will be OK once she's calmed down."

Twilight sighed, sitting down against the base of the tree. "But Rarity all but said," she complained, half to herself.

"I'm sure Rarity's just mistaken like you."

"Maybe. I don't know. I don't seem to be doing so well at solving all my problems today," she said.

"What's wrong, Twilight?" Fluttershy walked over and sat down next to the unicorn. "Can I help?"

Twilight looked up. "Actually," she said. "You're a pegasus, you must know a bunch of other pegasi around Ponyville."

"Well," said Fluttershy, looking at the ground. "There's not a huge number of them who really live in Ponyville. And there's some who visit, but I don't know all of them."

"Do you know any who'd want to threaten Applejack?"

"Applejack?" Fluttershy looked up. "Is something wrong with her?"

"Don't go spreading this. Like I said, it's her story to tell. But someone...well, they gave her a bit of a shock. It's why I was at Rarity's - someone stole one of her mannequins for it. I'm pretty sure it was a pegasus. The theif, not the mannequin."

"Really?"

"Don't worry," said Twilight, chuckling, "I don't suspect you. But, well, do you know anypony it could be?"

"I can't think of anypony who'd do that sort of thing. But I guess I hang around with pretty quiet sorts. What makes you think it was a pegasus?"

"They got into Rarity's through the second-floor window. You couldn't have climbed up there, you'd have to fly or have a unicorn lift you."

"But how could a pegasus tie knots in the rope?"

"There's some you can do with you teeth, if you're good at it."

"I guess."

The two sat in silence for a minute.

Twilight sighed again, and got to her feet. "Sorry, but I need to get back to the library. Spike will be wondering where I got to." She looked back at the pegasus. "If you think of someone..."

"I'll let you know."

As Twilight trotted back to the library, her mind was roiling. If only she hadn't offended Rainbow Dash, she might have a list of suspects by now. Instead, she just had one more thing to do, and no idea how to go about it. Maybe if she wrote everything down, it might make more sense. Writing things down was always a good idea.

She was so engrossed in thought, it never occured to her that she'd never mentioned to Fluttershy that rope was involved. The pegasus had come up with that fact all on her own.

Cheerilee squared off the last set of lesson plans and shoved them in the drawer.  She could have left this for later tonight, or even tomorrow morning, but she liked being organised. If you were organised, she figured, you were ready for anything.

She flipped closed her folder, revealing a small envelope. It was birthday-card sized and bleached pure white.

She glanced around the room. There was no one here, of course. The early afternoon sun slanted through the cheap wooden slat blinds, painting stripes of light and shadow around the room, illuminating the dust but leaving corners shadowed. Even in the middle of the day, the place felt...creepy. It didn't help with her current mood.

Eventually, she broke the seal. Inside was a small piece of card, cream-white. On one side was written, in a clear, bold script:

"Tonight

One hour after twilight

The hill beside the town hall"

Below this was a mark - a stylised horn, flanked by a pair of wings.

Cheerile balled the cardboard between her hooves, suppressing a groan. "Not now," she muttered to herself, "of all the things, not now."

She threw the card into the wastepaper basket. She did a circuit of the room, making sure the windows were closed, and surreptitiously peering under each desk. Finally, sighing, she left, locking the door behind her.

The room was silent.

One of the drawers to Cheerilee's desk rattled.

"Now I can't get out," it said.