The C̸̞̙̭̽̌̀̈́̽̕̕ȗ̵̧̨̢̻̩̞̘͙̉̋̊͂͘ŕ̷͖̦̍͝s̵̫̪̋̍͂̆̆͆̄é̶̡̧̺͖d̸͎͒̒̿̈̀ Apocalypse

Urrrgehhuuuhuuhu

I squirmed awake. You’d think I would conk the hell out after everything that happened yesterday, but nooooooooo. Here I was, waking up early as shit. Celestia’s sun wasn’t even showing up yet! It was still dark out.

I angrily scooted off the hospital bed, nearly tripping and falling on my face in the darkness of the room. I made my way to my backpack against the wall and dug inside it until I found the watch Twi had given me yesterday. I then pressed my eyes up against it so I could see the hands.

5:18

Bruh.

I know I’d been up a bit later than expected last night, since I had to deal with an intruder. And dealt with it, I did. She dealt with me too, though. I won’t go into detail, but we had some fun. Apparently she was raging with those same teenage hormones that was driving me to madness too.

It’d been a while since I fucked a human. I-

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Okay, that sounded a lot weirder than it did in my head...

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I literally can’t think of any other way to say it…

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...

So, you’d think I’d stay my ass asleep. But noooooooooooo. Author didn’t want that. He wanted to wake my ass up in 5 hours instead. Shithead.

Quiet lightning bolt.

AHH! I tensed up as the bolt silently pierced through the hospital ceiling.

Really? A quiet lightning bolt?

Yeah. I wouldn’t wanna wake up the others.

Wow.

I considered lying down and going back to bed, but for some reason, I was full of energy now. Maybe passing out yesterday, over and over again, allowed my body the rest it needed. Whatever. Considering how early it was, I decided to go pester Luna. She was likely one of the only ones up anyway, and I did have a question about the scheduled maintenance and economic upkeep of my chainsaw.

Yeah… I think it was getting low on gas. I hadn’t used it a whole lot, but between the castle, the boys, and the bushes, it was probably getting hungry. I actually didn’t know for sure, but lord knows I did not want it to run out of gas in the middle of a fight. So, I made my way down the hall to see her.

knock knock knock

That’s me knocking on her door.

Thanks for clarifying.

Yeah. Anyway, I didn’t feel like barging in and risking another spanking, so I followed proper etiquette and waited patiently for Luna to open the door. After twiddling my thumbs for a good ten seconds, there was no response.

Knock knock knock.

Another ten seconds. Come on, Luna! I haven’t got all day! Well, maybe I will. It wasn’t even technically daytime yet. I was just growing impatient.

Knock Knock Knock!

Did she not hear me? I knocked louder in case she didn’t, but there was still no response. Gaaaaah.

KNOCK knock knock.

The first knock scared me a bit, and I felt like she’d answer angrily if I continued. But STILL, after 10 more fucking seconds, she did not come to the door. Did she fall asleep? I remember them telling me they locked the sun and moon in kinetic orbit or whatever it was called, but surely she would still be up? It’d be really weird if Luna started sleeping every night.

Another ten seconds. Fuck this shit. I’ve been here, like, a minute. My impatience was bubbling throughout me. I could not wait any longer. I quietly hoped that I wouldn’t see something that would scar me forever as I slowly opened the door.

Creeeeak.

The room was very dimly lit by what seemed like some kinda night light, revealing first Celestia asleep on the bed to the left, where she almost spanked Abby. I continued slowly opening the door until I got to the source of light on the righ-

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Bro. Are you serious?

Luna was laying down on her stomach on the bed opposite Celestia. Her head was facing the middle of the room, but her eyes were glued to something laid out right below her.

A fucking Nintendo Switch.

Bruh.

Between her hooves was the switch, lighting up her concentrated face a light blue. She was holding two weird kinda stylus pens in her hooves to click the buttons on either side. Not only was she apparently playing a game on this switch, but she also had earbuds in her ear, connected to an IPOD laying next to her.

Ridiculous.

I dramatically flung the door open the rest of the way to allow the emergency light in the hallway to seep into the room. It was only then that she looked up from her switch and met eyes with me. Her eyes widened, and she made a face similar to a child who’d just been caught up playing games way past their bedtime.

She mouthed the word “Fuck!” before using one of her stylus pens to pause the song she was listening to on the iPod and pulling the earbuds from her ears. I angrily closed the door behind me, careful not to slam it and wake Celestia. I then quietly stomped over to Luna and crossed my arms.

“What the fuck, Luna?” I scoffed.

She pointed at Celestia and raised a hoof to her mouth, shushing before whispering, “D’mitry. Are you trying to get spanked again??”

We kept our voices down to avoid waking Celestia.

“No. Are you??”

She rolled her eyes. “You know that’s not how that works.”

Before she could react, I snagged the iPod from the bed and looked at it. I saw the song title before she aggressively snatched it back.

Bruh. She was listening to “Still D.R.E” by Dr. Dre. Lmao.

“Really?” I mocked.

“Oh be quiet, you little shit.”

I crossed my arms again.

“So, you can have all this crap, but I can’t even request my own damn jukebox records? You gotta be kidding me.”

“Yes. I am a princess, after all.”

I glanced back at Celestia sleeping across the room. She was snoring very unprincesslike. But, if I remember correctly, the princesses had banned this kind of stuff from being brought here. As I’ve said before, they always denied my requests to bring in social media, and stuff like this.

They weren’t entirely certain what this kind of technology would do in this world, as they hadn’t advanced past the barbaric ass age we were in. All three of them were pretty skeptical of technology in general, but you know, I guess fucking assault rifles and teenage boy degenerates were just fine, huh? It didn’t make much sense, but regardless, they weren’t big fans of tech.

At least… most of them weren’t…

I met eyes with Luna again.

“Doesn’t matter. I know what y’all have said. What, did y’all just suddenly change your minds about technology?”

“Uh, yes… we did.”

“Bullshit.”

I turned to go wake up Celestia, to which Luna frantically shot out her hoof and snagged my arm.

“Wait! Just wait, please?”

“That’s what I thought,” I jeered, returning to my dumbass crossed-arms stance. Actually, this was kinda cringe, so I uncrossed my arms and put them on my hips like an angry dad. She sighed defeatedly.

“Okay… we didn’t. But please don’t tell her.”

“Or what?”

…

“What?” she asked.

I shook my head. “Wait… no, that’s not the phrase I was going for. Hold on.”

Luna stared blankly as I thought of the phrase.

“Ah. So what’s in it for me?”

She closed her eyes in annoyance.

“Really? You’re going to blackmail me?”

“Oh yeah, I am. This is blackmail central. Choo choo, mothafucka.”

I pulled down an invisible train horn cord a couple times as she facehoofed frustratingly. After taking a minute to think to herself, she sighed and looked up at me.

“Okay. Here’s my proposal: two hoofjobs—one now, and one later on. How’s that sound?”

“Huh?”

“You said you’re blackmailing me…”

“I just wanted an iPod! Damn!”

“Oh…”

She averted her eyes, taking a moment to recollect herself. Despite being a darker pony, I could vaguely see blush show up on her cheeks. That meant she was blushing blushing. She turned back to me, unable to fully hide her new embarrassment.

“Please forget I said that. But yes, I can probably bring you an iPod of your own. As you know, our magic is still fading, but I believe I’ve got enough left to transport something small like that. That being said, you have to keep it secret from everybody, okay? Do you think you could manage that?”

“I’m pretty sure. I don’t know, though, if a princess as wise as you got caught, you don’t think I will? What actually happens if Celestia finds me with it?”

“What do you think?”

“We both get spanked?”

She rolled her eyes. “She doesn’t spank me—you know this. I’m pretty sure you asked us something stupid along those lines at one point, trying to see if we had some weird incest relationship going on.”

“I would never.”

“Pssssht.”

“Okay, but like, how would she punish you? I’m actually curious.”

“Just because she’s my big sister doesn’t mean she holds any more power than I do. And no, don’teven think about bringing up what I think you’re going to.”

I raised my hands defensively as she mean-mugged me.

“I won’t… but like, I just gotta ask… does any of this really matter with the, you know, apocalypse going on?"

“Probably not, honestly. If the wavelengths and frequencies emitted from this device affect our world somehow, then hopefully it's for the better. It’s too late to really do anything about them anyway.”

I chuckled. “It’d be funny if that switch of yours emitted rays and, like, electromagnetically blew up the world because you wanted to play video games.”

She looked at me with an unamused, straight face for a few seconds before shaking her head.

“I swear. You say some dumb shit sometimes.”

“Yeah, whatever. I keep y’all entertained at least.”

“That I can agree with.”

She and I sat in silence for a moment. Well, she did. I stood there, patiently waiting for her to speak as she took this moment to think.

“Okay,” she said, reaching back and grabbing a blindfold that was sitting beside her. “Can you make sure Celestia doesn’t wake up while I go get your iPod? Just the iPod, right?”

She hoofed me the blindfold.

“Hmm. Seeing as though it doesn’t matter anymore, I want a phone too.”

She huffed.

“No, D’mitry. Let’s take this one step at a time. Having two might be a challenge for you to keep them both hidden, especially since you might fall back into the typical human habit of pulling out your phone and checking it randomly throughout the day.”

I huffed. “Fiiiiiiine. How am I gonna pick the songs I want once I get my iPod, though?”

“You won’t be able to. I’ll pick them out for you.”

“Bruh.”

“Oh come on, you saw what I was listening to. Are you into Dr. Dre?”

I took a second to laugh to myself, careful not to wake Celestia.

“I mean, yeah. I find it funny that that’s the type of music you choose to listen to.”

“Oh be quiet, you judgemental little bastard. I listen to a lot of different genres.”

That statement brought up a thought.

“Wait a minute. How long have you had this iPod?”

She pressed her lips together and averted her eyes inconspicuously.

“Bro, no way!” I replied, “You brought these in before the apocalypse, didn’t you??”

Her facial expression convinced me so. She sighed. “Just the iPod. I brought in this switch during our train ride.”

“What games do you even play? What are you playing right now?” I asked, leaning over to see the screen of the switch.

“I don’t remember what it’s called.”

I took a closer look, which revealed the third-person view of a highly modified street-racing car with a tall spoiler. The game wasn’t outrageously detailed, but it was clearly some type of racing game. What was funnier to see was the big “turn around” indicator at the top of the screen.

“Interesting,” I commented, backing to a stand again. “So, you actually do know a thing or two about motors?”

"I do."

"Okay, prove it. What motor is in tha-"

"It's a Mercedes-AMG ONE, so it's a dual hybrid. The internal combustion engine is a 1.6L turbocharged V6 and it's got 4 more electric motors: 1 turbocharger, 1 MGU-K crankshaft motor, and 2 front axle motors to power the front wheels."

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“Damn.”

“Yeah… I’ve grown fond of the cars from your world. So… anyway, cover Celestia’s eyes with that blindfold while I go get you your iPod, okay? If anybody knocks, tell them to wait a minute.”

“Gotcha. Thanks.”

Luna briefly took some song suggestions from me before I walked across the room to keep Celestia asleep. It should be easy, considering she was still snoring. I wondered if I even needed to cover her eyes with the blindfold, but I remembered just how violently bright her horn had glowed when she went to get my chainsaw.

So, I stepped up to the side her head was facing and opened the cloth strap of the blindfold. I then carefully placed it over her head and horn, before ge-

snap

I froze after losing grip on the strap. The other end softly smacked the back of her head, causing her snoring to cease. The blindfold was in place now, but I might have awoken her. I waited anxiously, hoping she wouldn’t lift her head.

She groaned slightly, which turned into almost more of a moan. Kinda strange. Right after this, she opened her mouth and stuck her tongue out. Even more strange. I watched her keep her mouth open, her tongue slowly dancing around as if it were waiting for something. She moaned quietly one more time before closing it.

Wow.

Luna waited for my signal. I walked over to her instead.

“What is it?” she asked.

“I think Celestia’s having a dream about sucking someone off.”

Luna violently rolled her eyes. I chuckled. “You should see if she is.”

“I am not doing that, you damn pervert. I’ve seen enough out of her dreams. Just keep an eye on her, would you?”

“Oh, I will,” I smirked.

“D’mitry. If I come back and catch you with your penis out at all, you are going to face one of the most severe punishments you’ve ever faced on this planet. Do you understand?”

“Whoa, hey,” I replied, raising my hands in surrender again. “I wasn’t planning on it. I’m not that braindead.”

“Good. BRB.”

Luna’s horn glowed that same bright light as she traversed across the universe. It was interesting. I wish I could watch her, but I’m pretty sure I’d be blinded if I stared at her horn during this. Like, actually blinded for good. No thanks.

I looked away, making sure Celestia’s horny ass didn’t wake up. However, the nuke of light never made its appearance. I noticed the regular bright light slowly fade and turned around to see her blink her eyes open. There was no second iPod.

“What happened? You get lost or something?” I asked.

She grew a look of distress, eying me nervously.

“N- no… I…” she stammered, sighing and shaking her head. “I’m sorry, D’mitry, but… I… I ran out of the magic needed to get you your iPod.”

“Awe shit. I was actually in here originally because I think my chainsaw may need more gas soon. Will you not be able to get that either?”

“I’m afraid not…”

I got ready to pester her with more questions, but she suddenly started tearing up. I watched her for a second as she lost a battle against a few tears. After they slid down her cheeks, I started making sense of what I was seeing.

“Princess… are you okay?” I asked. I was by her bedside already, so I reached out a hand and set it on her back. I dunno… seems like something I should do. She sniffed and wiped away her tears.

“I’m fine… I’m just a bit scared about this all, you know?”

“Hmm. Well, that makes sense. But we should be alright. Once we get over this stupid apocalypse crap, surely we’ll find some way to bring y’alls magic back. Just gotta kick some zombie ass first.”

A timid smile appeared on her face.

“Thank you, D’mitry. If you want, you can borrow my iPod for now. Do you wanna do that?”

I disconnected my hand. “Sure!”

“Okay. How about this? You can have it for today, but give it back to me later tonight. We can share it, so you let me know when you want it again. Sound good?”

“Hell yeah! Thanks.”

I hugged Luna and left her to play with her virtual racecar, setting the iPod in my pocket for now. Since I couldn’t get to sleep, I decided to stop by the cafeteria to grab an early breakfast. On the way, however, an open door caught my eye. The room it led to was dark, but an emergency light sat right outside of it in the hallway. I gently opened this door, allowing the emergency light to vaguely fill up the small room.

Nobody was sleeping in it. This was one of those rooms similar to the one I had gotten blood taken from. It was almost like a regular doctor’s office room. On the back wall was a sink and some cabinets above and below a counter. What aroused my curiosity was a cabinet beneath the sink slightly ajar.

I walked across the room and opened the cabinet all the way, notici-

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Yes! YES!

I found it! Fuck yeah!

Snowheart had stashed her painkillers away, seeing as though I could ‘not be trusted’ around them. Looks like she didn’t do a good enough job hiding them. My greedy ass reached inside and grabbed the pill bottle. It was only when I hovered the bottle in front of my face to verify the Rx name that I paused.

sigh

The nurses had their reasoning. I wasn’t even in pain anymore, really. I definitely felt some soreness, but… ah…

No. This wasn’t right. I wanted to do the right thing, so I set aside my greed and put the pill bottle back. That’s when I noticed something hidden in the other corner of the cabinet. I hadn’t seen it at first, given how dark the corner was. I reached out, realizing it was another pill bottle she'd hidden. This one didn’t feel or sound like it had pills inside, so I set my face close to the bottle to see wha-

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Holy crap.

LSD!! Inside the pill bottle were the familiar, tiny square papers of LSD I’d seen her carry from time to time. I couldn’t believe it. I mean… I knew she occasionally had this LSD, but she hadn’t even mentioned it the past few days. This must have been something she was really hiding from me. This thought angered me a bit.

What? Did she think I would irresponsibly take them when I shouldn’t, and therefore spend the rest of the apocalypse days tripping balls? Bitch. I was responsible.

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Surely one wouldn’t hurt right now, though, right?