I’ve been to parties, gatherings, balls, basically events where ponies have a good time doing various activities. Never, and I mean never had I been to a party where somepony put hot sauce on all the muffins. Found out that they were labelled on the tray but me being hungry I didn’t bother to read them. So there I was with my tongue on fire and my eyes slightly watering.

“Spark yeh alright there? Yeah burning up somethin fierce” I turn to see Applejack there looking concerned.

“Muffins….fucking hot sauce….need drink cough” It bloody hurts to talk.

Applejack nodded and then walked off, hopefully bringing back a drink. ‘Christ I haven’t had anything this hot in ages. Who da fuck likes hot sauce with fucking muffins?’

“Hey Spark, How did…..why are you all red?” I turn to see Twilight behind me with Fluttershy gasping at me then running towards me in a blink of an eye. Before I had a chance to speak she ran a hoof on my forehead.

“Spark you have a fever, what did you do? You were fine before you came in not 5 minutes ago”

“Cough, hot sauce in ‘cough’ muffins” I grasped my throat with my hoof as it burned to talk. Luckily I saw my cowgirl saviour with a cup of purple liquid.

“Ere Spark, this’ll cool yeh throat” She handed me the cup and without stopping for a breath I drank every last drop causing me to breath a deep breath. It stopped the burning but wasn’t completely gone.

“Cough, I’m all for curry and that but fuckin hell that was hot. Who does that with muffins?”

“Sigh that would be Pinkie for you Spark. I did the same thing back when I first had a surprise party from her. Even though mine wasn’t labelled with hot sauce muffins on a card next to them” Twilight smirking at me.

“Argh Bite me bookworm, thank you Applejack for the save.” The mare nodding.

“Sigh, I need some rum for my throat”

“Spark, not now. Later, there are foals about and we can’t have them have any alcohol. They are far too young to see the effects” Bloody Twilight ruining the fun.

“What! Sod off I’m thirsty, besides I don’t share my rum. Why? Cause it’s MY rum.”

“Alright Spark, I will let you, later on though. Just not when there is foals and other ponies about that won’t like seeing you drunk. Not like I can stop you to begin with”

I smirked at her, making sure she got the message and she smiled back.

‘Jokes on her, I have a hidden flask of the stuff in a specific book on a shelf somewhere’

I looked around the room to see if I could remember where I put it.

“Shit, forgot where I put it”

“Put what Spark?” The purple menace asking.

“Oh er nothing, just erm. Gonna mingle” I left the left ear twitch again, so happy Twilight wasn’t told about my ‘sure’ sign of lying.

And so began my epic quest to mingle/find my bloody stash as I was getting bored quickly. For a party it felt, I don’t wanna be mean but, it was designed for a little girl’s party. Like the kind of shit you had when you was 8. Party games like pin the tail on the pony, non-alcoholic punch. Sigh, I hope things change……fuck I’m selfish, these ponies came to say hey and I’m thinking about me here. Bloody feelings. Speaking of feelings that involve 2 ADULT ponies that have had a connection on a physical level….I’m chatting about lust here, I see Vinyl Scratch at the other end on a small stage with her mixing board and decide to make my way to her, well tried to before 3 fillies came up to me In my way. Each had that look in their eyes, the one that makes them look like these 3 get into trouble a lot.

“Erm, hey. You kids need out?” Did I ever tell you, I’m fucking shit with kids.

“Your pretty Miss Shine” A unicorn filly spoke softly, her mane was swirled at the ends with a light purple/pink colouration. A smile adored her face as she complimented me. ‘This kid is alright, very sweet of her to say that.’

“Heh, thank you little filly. You seem to know me but I don’t know you”

“Oh, I’m Sweetie Belle” The unicorn pointing to herself. ‘Fuckin pony names, still though. This one is good in my books’

“I’m Applebloom” The earth filly spoke. She had the same accent as Applejack, guessing with the name their sisters or something. She had a reddish mane with a brink pink bow at the back with a yellow coat.

“I’m Scootaloo” The pegasus Her mane was that of a purple magenta with a small quiff with a light orange coat. Although looking at her wings they were a bit smaller for her age then they should be. ‘She must have a birth defect or lack of magic in her wings for them to grow properly. Poor kid’ couldn’t see a cutie mark on either of the 3 fillies in front of me.

“and together we’re the CUTIE MARK CRUSADERS!” they each shouted in unison causing me and those around me to pin their ears to the side of the head.

“Did yeh have to shout though? Ma ears are ringin now” I learned a technique that involves you to flap your ears to get rid of the ringing sensation. Most of the time it works.

Each sheepishly smiled at me. ‘Sigh, guess I cant be mad at them. Their just kids. Christ I was pretty much like that when I was their age’.

“Are you really Twilight’s Cousin?” Scootaloo asking me.

“Yeah Scoots, didn’t yeh ere what AJ said?” The Applebloom speaking.

“I don’t remember”

“Well yeah, me and bookworm are cousins. Her dad Night Light is my uncle” Scootaloo and Applebloom snickering at my comment on Twilight.

“Wow, cool cutie mark” Looking behind me to see Sweetie pointing at my ass. Ok?

“Hey let me see” The other two making their way and admiring the tramp stamp that appeared those years ago.

“What is it Miss Shine?”

“It’s a supernova surrounded by electricity, in other words my talent is enchanting” I couldn’t be arsed going into the finer details of what a supernova was as I was more bothered to be on my way of being smashed but guess I’ve gotta wait.

Scootaloo looking at me with sparkles in her eyes “Woah, so you can say make something that can give us cutie marks?”

“Wait what, that’s not”

“Yeah aw please Miss Spark, we’re the only three in our class without ours” The unicorn giving me puppy eyes followed shortly by the other 2.

“Yeah, that crap doesn’t work on me so quit it, also that’s not how enchanting works.”

“Hummm you said a naughty word” The typical noise a child would make if caught saying something they heard.

“Many fuuu”

“AHEM” Turning to see Rarity with a not very amused look on her face.

“…What?”

“I would like it Spark, if you didn’t say such vulgar words in front of the little ones, especially to my little sister”

“Hey, I didn’t know yeh sister was one of them. Although now I can see the resemblance. Also, freedom of speech” me sticking my tongue out at her.

I saw Vinyl at her station bobbing her head to the beat, don’t think she has seen me so me smirking and getting an idea I ‘casually’ walk towards her but going along the edge of the party. I was right behind the stage and stepping on it put me about 2 feet away from her. Halfway through her song I grabbed her tail with my magic and pulled her towards me roughly causing her to yelp and fall onto the floor as she turned over onto her back, I was inches away from her muzzle with my own supporting a grin as I was standing over her.

“Notes”

She was blushing and then with her own grin linked our lips together, causing me to moan and her to blush more. A few seconds into the kiss I heard somepony clearing their throat, looking up to see Applejack with an arched eyebrow while Rainbow behind her supporting a wing boner.

“Just saying hello to Notes here” Me helping Vinyl up and her adjusting her glasses onto her mane.

“I’d appreciate it if yeh didn’t do that sort ta thing in public. I swear if ma sister saw this”

“Woah, like gonna stop yeh right there. 1 we were behind a high mixing desk so nopony could see us up here, 2 my fault but I don’t care. 3 I ain’t the one sporting a wing boner right now” Me pointing to Rainbow causing AJ to turn around and see Rainbow trying to put her wings down with her hooves with no result as they sprang back up.

“Confound it dash, there be foals about”

“Hey don’t blame me. That was hot, now gimme a hoof will yeh”

AJ turned to slightly frown at me. “We’re havin a chat later Spark” As she was pushing Rainbow to the side as some ponies noticed the arousal state of the Spectrum pegasus.

I felt a nibble on my left ear causing me to blush and pant slightly as Vinyl grinned and gave me a small peck on my cheek. “Next time Spark, gimme a warning”

“Why, you never done it on the job?” This gave Vinyl her muzzle to become redder in colour as she shook her head side to side.

“Maybe after Spark, now go mingle”

“Maybe huh? Suuure. Besides I take it you know that Pinkie Pie then?”

Vinyl changed her track on the mix board. “Yeah, she throws some bangin parties. That and I owe her a few. Somehow she knew that we’ve met. You haven’t told anypony about what we’ve done right?”

“Nah I ain’t. Figured a famous Dj would want that shit kept private”

“Then it’s just Pinkie being Pinkie” As she fully turned and bobbed her head to the side I left her to it, just before getting off stage I saw a book on the shelves behind slightly sticking out.

‘That book looks familiar’ I levitated it and opened it to reveal my flask causing to smile and look around to make sure no pony was looking. I grabbed it out of the book and had a small gulp, feeling the strong taste of the spirit travel down my throat giving me a warm feeling. I quickly stashed the book back and causally got off stage only to be greeted by a pair of pegasus. Christ, everypony wants a piece of me today. Hmm must be twins looking at them. Kinda guessing that as they both have the same colouration of fur and mane. Light grey and a very light blue. One on the left had her mane in a one piece shape that slicked down with a pink bow in the back while the one on the right had a wild look rocking on with most of it held back with a fringe and tipped in white. Gotta say though, not bad at all on the whole attractive apartment. If you’d have told me that I would find talking small ponies attractive on Earth as a human I’d have called you a weirdo and phoned the police, but now living as one of them. I’m excused.

“Wow Rainbow wasn’t kidding was she Sis”

“Nah Flitter, better in pony”

This made me arch an eyebrow at them. “Well I hope I tick all the right boxes girls”

“Don’t worry Sweetheart, you do. I’m Flitter and this is my twin sister Cloudchaser” The one dubbed Flitter to my left (one with Pink bow) pointing to her sister to her side.

“Pleasure to meet yeh.”

“Pleasures all ours. So, I take it you know our DJ over there? Judging by the reaction of you sneaking around behind her and suddenly her disappearing behind the desk” Cloudchaser speaking up. There voices are quite similar.

“We might have met somewhere. Thought I was sneakier then that, damn” ‘Really do have to be more careful around here’

“I think we’re the only ones to know, kinda saw what happened to the Captain with her wings out”

Both twins giggling at the thought. “But yeah something must have happened”

“Sorry girls but I’m not the telling type” As I walked past them I stopped beside them and with a low whisper only they could hear. “I prefer to show” Giving them a wink and seeing their faces change from a curious look to a shock/sultry I excused myself from them. Little tip I’ve learned on this world. If ponies are perusing yeh, make em work for it. After all it is your body, only those you chose get a taste. Speaking of taste I do I slight glare at a Pink pony that gives me a sheepish smile right back. Guess she’s been told about that bloody hot sauce muffin take. Guess I’ll mingle since I’m gonna be staying in this little village for several months. Sigh, can’t believe I have to set up a bloody perimeter around the edge of that forest. Shining is defo getting a backhoof when I see him, so many things to set up. I’m gonna have to build a small metal shed to store the pylons and fences, also a small ditch in case I overload it and it blows up. Least Twi said she’d chip in, guess I can behave…..Nah fuck that.

________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

About 3 hours later it was beginning to get late for some ponies, some of the kids were getting tired and other ponies had work in the morning, which meant I could fucking drink and be merry, WOOOOOOOO. This is how you party. Get the hard stuff out, have a few drinking games. After a few games with Twilights friends, seeing which ones can hold their own is funny. Looks like Rarity, Twilight and Fluttershy are the lightweights of the group. Bless Shy though, girl does try at least. Twilight is slurring and trying to say facts about how alcohol is bad in too much quantity, and Rarity keeps spacing out and muttering to herself about colours. Applejack and Rainbow are having a fun time either competing in games or picking the other to drink or popping jokes but the real question is Pinkie. I have personally seen with my own eyes her drinking a full bottle of Griffin vodka and not even feeling slightly tipsy or her face becoming a scowl in the taste. She must be the best at hiding it as she just acts like she has done since the start of this party, all bubbly and cheerful. Or her tolerance is god like, could be that. I think I’d like to see her and Celestia in a drinking contest, then I could decide who to nerf in the next patch.

Other ponies stuck around for the after-party. Vinyl put her music desk on a playlist so she could enjoy herself a bit, me and her made a few flirty comments about each other. Think others might have heard some judging the faces their making but it didn’t stop us. Mostly Applejack. Think the girl has a problem with me. Whatever, I’m enjoying myself.

The twins Cloudchaser and Flitter were still here, Cloud really going through the booze and Flitter keeping her pace, although her sister seemed more wasted. Lyra and Bonbon had a few themselves but judging by their ‘quick bathroom session’ together I think their doing something frisky if both their blushes and panting mean anything, pretty sure I’m the only one who has noticed so far.

“Alright everypony, gather in a circle if you wanna play spin the bottle. Who doesn’t wanna have fun?!” Pinkie announcing with an empty bottle placed on the floor.

Most of the ponies made their way and sat down in a circle with their drinks. By this point I was half way through a bottle of my rum. ‘I might need to get more at some point. Wait what’s twilight doing?’

“Oh no you don’t bookworm. You ain’t sitting this one out” Twilight let out a yelp as my magic grasped her from the side-lines and made her sit next to me.

“Spark hic, I do not need any more alcohol. 2 ciders is enough for me and…I do not want to be apart of hic, this”. Twilight swaying a bit whilst looking at me with a frown.

“Twilight I don’t ask for much”

She looked at me like I just grew a second head.

“Ok maybe a bit, but come on. I’ve never seen you buzzed before. Last time was like 2 years ago when I saw yeh and even then you were more arsed with yeh books then actually enjoying life”

“Sigh, you have a point. Alright Spark, I’ll do this. But on one condition”

She lend to me her to whisper “No love life questions from you” Well whisper is a strong word, more like talked normally for the entire circle to hear but I just played it off like she was the only one who told me, making me wink at the others when she wasn’t looking.

“Hey Spark, have I ever said you smell good?” Turning to see on my right that Cloudchaser was quite close to me again, this girl is bolder on the booze.

“You mentioned it a few times we was playing some card games”

“Alright everypony, we’ll do a truth or dare but by spinning it. Whichever pony it lands on will spin it and so on. Are we ready?” Pinkie bubbling with joy. With a unison of either drunk yeahs or a nod she span the bottle.

First up was Fluttershy as she hid behind her mane a bit. “Ohh dear, I’m first”

“Ok, Fluttershy, truth or dare” Pinkie asking.

“Oh erm, I’ll go for truth” Saying as she took a sip of her drink.

“Right, erm. Anypony got a question for her?”

“Ou, I got one” Flitter putting her hoof up. “Who was your first crush and when was it?”

“F first crush? Oh dear. W well it was, erm back in F flight school and I erm, was 17. His name was Street Flight” Fluttershy’s blush becoming clearer and her trying to look elsewhere.

“Now Flitter dear, we do not ask a lady her first crush in a social environment” Rarity speaking out.

Flitter rolling her eyes at Rarity. “That’s the whole point of truth Rarity, anyway Fluttershy your turn to spin”

Fluttershy giving her hoof a flick resulting in the bottle stopping on Twilight.

“I think I’ll take a truth hic” I had to make sure Twilight didn’t fall over as she started to sway a bit. ‘Bloody Lightweight’

“I got one, so Twilight. Whats your deepest fetish?” ‘Woah Rainbow, coming in with a big one there’ Judging by the groups reaction, they weren’t expecting that kind of question as some were shocked while others were waiting on Twilight to get over the shock and horror of having to tell everypony present.

Twilight spending a good half a minute until I nudged her and she turned to me and looked round the group with a sigh.

“My, deepest fetish if you must know is…..to be ravaged by a strong stallion” Most was disappointed in the response her gave out.

“That’s it?”

“Yeah Cousin. Usually the quiet ones are the biggest pervs.”

“What? Spark I am not a pervert. Besides I am not quiet” Twilight kinda raising her voice at me, even though she was like less than 30 centimetres away from me.

“I meant quiet as in, little to no sex life”

“Oh for the love of, I’m just going to spin this and hopefully move on” Using her magic it landed on Lyra who was nibbling on Bon bon’s left ear before she looked around and sheepishly smiled.

“Sigh, Lyra truth or Dare” I could tell Twilight was still a little flustered with her answer before. Seriously though I could think of way more embarrassing fetishes to be into. At least she ain’t a creep, so long as it doesn’t hurt anypony you be you, yeh know.

“Hmm, I’ll take a dare”

“Right well I dare you to, erm go outside and shout erm” Twilight trying to think of something, shame I took over.

“I wanna put my face in between Celestia’s legs”

“Oh Celestia damn it”

“SPARK WHAT IN TARTARUS!?” Twilight again shouting right in my fucking ear.

“Twilight, you need to learn how to chill. Seriously I have to get you laid girl.”

This causing the twins to giggle as well as Rainbow.

We saw Lyra shouting at the top of her voice the sentence she was dared to and came back in more redder by embarrassment while silently sitting down and spinning the bottle causing half the group to laugh in hysterics. As some calmed down it landed on Rainbow.

“Ill go with Truth Lyra hehe”

“Fine, why was you sporting a wing boner at the start of the party hmm?” Lyra grinning at her.

“Oh, right well erm.” Rainbow going a full Fluttershy on us.

“Oh shit” I turned to see Vinyl giving me the same look as we both knew the answer.

“What did you do Spark?” Twilight judging me.

I turned to answer her. “Woah don’t jump the gun girl I ?”

“Spark and Vinyl were making out behind the desk on the stage”

“Oh my”

“Dang it Spark”

“I heard a pomf noice and turn to see not Cloudchaser but Flitter sporting a wing boner now. “Sorry”

“Oh for love of, I was told of your antics but this is starting to take the cake Spark” Twilight ruining the mojo a bit.

“Taking cake, whose stealing cake?” Pinkie more concerned with a cake thief apparently. Rarity trying to explain to Pinkie about the situation, even though she’s drunk.

“Well erm” Turning to look at Vinyl she pulled up her glasses and gave me a nod.

“I was saying hi to her is all. That and we was behind a mixing desk no nopony saw us, besides the ones muzzling in on it” Me smirking at Rainbow and Applejack who both turned to look elsewhere.

“Anyway, blame me if it’ll make yeh sleep at night. It was my idea, not Notes there”

“Sigh, we are having a talk at some point. What if some foals saw what you were doing?”

Applejack nodding in response.

“Don’t look then” me shrugging and Twilight facehoofing.

“You are difficult Spark”

“Love you too, now Rainbow, spin” As ordered she span it and landed on Cloudchaser.

“Gimme a dare Captain”

Rainbow smirking and responded with “I dare you to kiss with tongue a pony in this room”

Not even giving a second I felt a pair of hooves around my face and a pair of lips touching mine causing her to moan and me to be a little bit shock but then leaning in and accept her tongue. Damn girl she wanted to dominate my mouth, however I had to pull away from about 10 seconds of tongue warfare to breath and to stop the rise of my 5th leg showing to everypony watching. By that I saw all pegasi showing of their wings, most ponies looking away, Applejack hiding her face behind her hoof, Rainbow drooling? Alright then, Vinyl biting her lip and Flitter looking a bit jealous. Looking back at Cloudchaser and her giving me a sultry look.

“Somepony’s interested” Me smirking back and giving her a wink, looking back towards Flitter then back to her sister I whispered to Cloud “Think your sister is a bit left out though, hoping to share tonight?” I look to see Cloud smirking and then nodding towards me. She turned to whisper to Flitter and her face changed to another sultry look.

“I think I can share you with her Spark”

“Hey, not that I don’t mind a bit of eye candy every now and then, we carrying on?” Bon Bon asking.

“Oh yeah, sorry” Cloud turning the bottle.

The game lasted well into the night as ponies started to either call it one or kept on drinking and getting more daring with the questions and well dares. This type of game though does give you a more in-depth idea of who a pony really is. What they like, how they respond to certain questions, whether Twilight would ever find somepony to help her relax. Seriously we all teased her throughout the night about her sex life. Fuckin hilarious but anyway as some ponies were leaving I felt a nibble on my ear making me moan a bit and turned to see Flitter.

“You wanna go back to ours then?” As soon as she said that I felt a tongue on my cheek and saw Cloudchaser grinning.

“Now how could I saw no?” Both twins were outside but as I was about to Twilight shouted my name, asking me where I was going. “I’m about to rustle some feathers, see ya tomorrow Twi”

Author's Note

Yeah, i lied. No clop I'm afraid...in this chapter. Next one will be though, sorry for the tease but hey ho it'll be juicy for those who wish to read it. Finally though I'm free from Uni so i have more free time to dish out some more chapters. I am far from done with this fic, Thank you for being patience guys and have a mint day