Wails of despair, or at least discomfort, penetrated Noctilucent's ears like sharp needles and rattled her brains — even with her ears pinned flat against her skull.

An infant earth pony cradled in her forelegs ignore her attempts to sooth it. She tried gently rubbing a hoof on the distraught foal's back, as fellow-trainee Nurse Pearl Singer had done to great effect on other squalling brats. But the warm bundle of damp fur squirmed and howled, demonstrating her breed's vast lung capacity.

"Here, let me take her", Pearl Singer cooed and Noctilucent gingerly transfered the infant to her care.

Pearl Singer shared living quarters with her and Tongue Pressor, and was thankfully a much quieter room mate. A specialist in pregnancy, birth, and mare's health matters, Singer had a nigh magical touch with young ones and the struggling infant quickly calmed as it snuggled against her fluffy pale pink chest fur.

"Can you please deal with her dirty diaper? I'll get a nice clean fresh one on you, snuggle-bunny." She cooed into the foal's ear and carefully carried her from the bathing area to the second changing station. Leaving Noctilucent to deal with a horrid mess on the first one.

Penance.

That was the only way to think about this task and remain calm. One small penance for her many wrong-doings as Nightmare Moon. Noctilucent gingerly grabbed the clean edges of the filthy diaper and wielded a scraper to remove the horrid green-brown sludge that coated its centre. Once that had been removed and washed away, the still-filthy cloth was deposited into a lidded bin with a mound of others. She could only thank the stars she'd never been ordered to work in the laundry facilities. Yet. It must be a scene from Tartarus in the hospital's basement.

This was the least pleasant task she'd performed in the past few days. Emptying bed pans was a close second with helping to turn and sponge bathe bed-ridden patients a close third. Head Nurse Redheart was quickly becoming Noctilucent's least favourite pony in the hospital. Her arrival heralded the start of another round of penance. Noctilucent spent her afternoons and evenings working with Dr. Cake but in the morning she was just another warm body to be bossed around. She had to bite back curses when morning assignments to middenmare duties were hoofed out.

"Why don't you use your magic to remove the poo?" asked Pearl while she finished swaddling the burbling infant.

Noctilucent wrinkled her nose and whispered, "I f-f-feel everything I touch in that m-manner. It would be most… foul."

"Oh? I should have guessed that. It's certainly no picnic doing the job by hoof! I thought you could just cast a spell and poof it would be gone."

A blast of cleansing fire would be a more appropriate fate for those filthy rags but such a display would terrify others, damage the building, and be a waste of the hospital's already thin resources. Noctilucent sighed as she followed Pearl into the nursery, where the infant was carefully laid to sleep a row of bassinets.

"T-That is the last one." Thank the Moon!

"Mmhmm", Pearl Singer hummed while tucking the blankets. "We'd better get down to Emergency for Dr. Horse's lecture on defibrillators."

Noctilucent's ears perked up and she nodded. "Indeed."

She'd read about the device the night before and was somewhat interested in seeing it demonstrated, though where they would locate somepony requiring it's use was not clear. She could induce 'life-threatening cardiac dysrhythmias' in a sleeper, but doing so would be against modern medical ethics. Experimenting on traitors and murderers had gone out of fashion centuries ago.

They bid Nursery Rhyme a good morning and left the mare with her now peacefully sleeping charges. It was even quieter in the E.R., where they found Nurse Tenderheart reading a magazine of mane care tips.

"Oh, thank goodness", she exclaimed and jumped from her chair. "Keep an eye on things for a moment!" She galloped away without waiting for a reply.

Pearl giggled and wrinkled her muzzle cutely. "Potty break?"

"Mmmh… I-It seems we are early."

There was no sign of Dr. Horse or Tongue Pressor.

"Yeah, I figured you might like a breather after dealing with the little ones. You're a quiet one, Noctilucent."

She nodded and express her gratitude with a smile.

"Where are you from?"

"O-Oh… Unterfetlock, a t-tiny village in the Unicorn Range. I d-doubt you will have heard of it."

"I haven't. Are they very traditionalist?"

Noctilucent heard a hint of worry and accusation in her question and replied, "The townponies are m-mostly unicorns but n-n-not tribalist."

"Good! I- Do you hear that?" Singer's ears twitched toward the outside entrance.

There were faint yells, rapidly coming closer. Noctilucent followed Pearl Singer as she galloped to the swinging doors and flung them open. A pair of pegasi mares carrying a grey pegasus stallion in a blanket landed at the door. The stallion had good reason to howl; his forelegs were bloody twisted wrecks.

Noctilucent snapped at Pearl, "Fetch a rolling bed at once!"

Twilight's voice-altering spell throttled her commanding tone down to a normal conversation volume. It nearly broke under the strain, tugging lightly at Noctilucent's muzzle.

The other trainee nurse blinked at her in shock.

"The bed! Quickly now."

Pearl shook herself and galloped back into Emergency.

Rounding on the pegasi who'd brought the injured stallion she asked, "What occurred?"

The rainbow-maned mare panted, "Mid-air collision and crash landing. We gotta get back for Sunshower. She's not hurt as bad as Cloud Chaser but we're gonna bring her in too."

"Aye. Hold a moment."

Noctilucent's horn glowed brightly as she cast a numbing spell and touched her hoof to his heaving side. He immediately calmed and she gently levitated him off of the blanket, carefully immobilising what was left of his legs with her magic. The scent of blood and his whimpers set her heart racing. While Nightmare Moon had spent her troops lives cheaply, Princess Luna had always pitched in with mopping up after battle. At least this fellows wings were intact and he might yet be useful for intelligence gathering sorties, if he survived.

Pearl Singer returned with a rolling bed and Noctilucent deposited him on it as the mares grabbed the bloody blanket and shot off into the sky. Keeping the broken limbs stable with her magic they rolled him into the Emergency Room.

"Fetch forth a chirurgeon", she ordered Pearl. "This stallion needs attending to at once!"

"A what?" Singer gasped.

"A…" What was the modern term? "A surgeon! Dr. Hooves or whomever you may find. Go quickly!"

Pearl Singer fled into the hospital while Noctilucent examined his broken forelegs. Splintered white bone poked through blood-soaked grey hide. They would have to come off and the stumps cauterised to avoid bleeding out and risk of infection! While she knew spells that would quickly deal with the matter, Noctilucent decided to wait for the chirugeon's… the doctor's opinion. Meanwhile, she could prepare the necessary equipment in case they wished to do this by hoof.

Where did they keep the bone saws?

"When I got back with Dr. Hooves she had and knives and a wood saw from somewhere on a tray, and was digging through the cabinets looking for… What was it?"

Noctilucent pouted at Pearl Singer's question and reluctantly answered, "Irons."

"That was it! Cauterising irons for after amputation, right?" Pearl giggled and snorted while pressing a hoof over her muzzle.

Noctilucent grimaced and took a generous bite from her toasted tomato and daisy sandwich. She'd rather sink her teeth into Singer! Mouth full, she restrained herself from snapping at the gleeful mare.

Tongue Pressor patted Noctilucent's back with a wing and said, "Aww, you shouldn't tease her Singer. Anypony would freak out and get confused in that kinda situation. She's a psychologist not a surgeon for Celestia's sake!"

"You're right. You're right. I'm sorry Luci. It's just, the look on Dr. Hooves face when he made you explain was priceless!" She giggle-snorted again and said, "At least you didn't freeze up like I did. You should have seen her, Pressy! She took charge like a drill sergeant and got me moving."

"The stud's gonna keep his legs though, right?"

Pearl nodded and said, "He's in surgery now but he'll be fine after a few weeks in recovery."

"Good!" Tongue Pressor gave Noctilucent's back another pat and settled into her seat. "Let's talk 'bout somethin' else then. Thinkin' 'bout how messed up his legs looked is putting me off lunch." She prodded her limp slice of pizza. "Or maybe it's just the lunch putting me off my lunch."

"We should all go into town for a real meal and hit Shugarcube Corner for cheese cake after", said Pearl Singer while stirring her mystery soup.

"Alright!"

They both looked at Noctilucent and she whispered, "T-thank you, but I sh-shall remain here."

Tongue Pressor pouted and moaned, "Awww… How come?"

"I h-have an essay to write f-for Dr. Hooves." It was bad enough to be mocked in public for her mistake but to have earned 'homework' as well was adding affront to chagrin.

"That's a shame. Oh! They're having a bogo on hooficures at the salon so maybe we can do that before dinner?" Pearl Singer asked Tongue Pressor.

Pressor ruffled her wings and nodded. "Sounds good to me! Have you tried their Glitter Bomb mane wash? It's freakin' amazeballs!"

Noctilucent half-heartedly munched on her sandwich while barely paying attention to her fellow trainee nurses. Though she wanted to be friends with modern ponies, to involve herself in their lives and this new world, much of what they said was gibberish in her ears! And they spoke so quickly, salting their dialogue with idioms which eluded her. Though they sat in Equestria's heartland it was akin to visiting a foreign land where they spoke in cant or a pidgin tongue.

At least this afternoon would be spent in Dr. Cake's company, discussing mental health matters in which she was fluent.

Warm wood planks beneath Noctilucent's rump were a welcome change from the cold slate tiles in the hospital's newer wings. She sighed and closed Pinkie Pie's patient folder before settling the thick stack of loose pages atop Fluttershy's much thinner file.

Neither truly required her intervention, here or in the realm of dreams. Their most recent prognosis reports were a testament to modern psychology and Dr. Cake's dedication to his patient's welfare.

She glanced up at his closed office door as a muffled feminine squeal came from inside.

Therapeutic Desensitisation. An obscure-sounding mouthful for simply giving somepony a damn good scare. Something 'new' in medicine that Luna had practised on instinct for centuries in pony's dreams. Once upon a time foals had whispered hopeful tales of Luna rescuing them from nightmares and she was looking forward to that joyful duty. But oftentimes it was kinder to induce a nightmare to guide a pony's life down more fruitful paths in the waking world. But she dared not speak of her experience with nocturnal therapeutic desensitisation and had been ask to retreat to the hallway. Cast out when Lily Valley, the Doctor's current patient, had expressed nervousness at having her witness the treatment.

Earlier, Dr. Cake had discussed her case with Noctilucent, and she could imagine the scene in the office: Dr. Cake at his most supportive, encouraging Lily to confront her terrors by petting a fluffy toy mouse.

There was no arguing with the doctor's successes with such absurd-seeming treatments. Perhaps she could visit Lily's dreams and try to hasten the process?

She pursed her lips and shook her head. No. She didn't want to interfere and must focus her currently limited power upon her own charges. Dirt Nap's folder levitated up from her side and she flipped through its pages, looking for any clues she might have missed. There was little more to it than a few pages detailing treatment for minor injuries incurred while working in construction. His initial consultation with Dr. Cake pointed to isolation from ponies his own age as the root cause of his current troubles. He'd been raised in a distant copper mining town where the seam had played out long ago, forcing most ponies to relocate. Only the elderly who were too poor or sentimental to move to greener pastures remained.

Tonight she would continue her own brand of therapy with the colt. She'd gathered enough power to walk and tomorrow would be a 'day off' so it would not matter if she got little sleep.

Setting Dirt Nap aside she picked up Clickspring's much thicker folder, though it was less than half of Miss Pie's.

His file was a litany of issues, piled up like a foal's jumble game. Noctilucent couldn't decide which stick to pull on first! There were the usual annual physicals showing he was in reasonable health, a number of tests and counselling for digestive disorders, prescriptions for a numbing ointment to apply twice daily to his damaged horn stub. Nothing out of the ordinary until Nurse Redheart paid him a surprise house call during Ponyville's most recent unicorn Festival. He had been faking an illness so other ponies would not question his staying home. Reading her report of his condition and history was moving and disgusting in equal measure.

He had suffered an accident as a young colt which destroyed half of his horn and then an unrelated surgery which left his penis irreparably damaged. She winced and shook her head. It was easy to see why this stallion was so retiring after being robbed of both metaphorical and actual masculinity. Gelding to remove sexual urges might be the kindest thing. Then again, he might yet make good breeding stock since the damage was not in his bloodline, which was exemplary. His family traced their roots to prosperous settlers from the Old Country. Noble in deed and industry, if not in decent.

A muffled shriek from the office distracted her. Dr. Cake must have moved on to the cuddly bat or adorably fluffy spider toy.

Rolling her eyes she flipped to the next page.

It wasn't surprising that an emasculated stallion would take to playing at mare. There was a time, mere months ago by her reckoning, when his disgusting lusts would have seen him castrated and cast out, or perhaps simply put down.

While staying with Twilight Sparkle, Luna had read the Bill of Pony Rights & Responsibilities which had been passed into law almost a century prior to her return. It included freedom of sexual expression and now 'same-sex oriented' ponies were allowed, encouraged even, to marry. To marry! It made her head spin that such vile acts were now openly practised at Festival. With the lack of eligible bachelors she could understand mares resorting to it out of desperation, or curiosity. She had been young once — twice, now. But stallions? Pawing at one another, kissing, squandering life-giving seed. It made her hide crawl.

Noctilucent gnawed on the edge of a hoof and set Clickspring's folder aside.

Her discomfort highlighted an attitude needed modernising before she'd be fit to rule again. There was nothing for it, she would have to be friendly with Clickspring and others of his ilk in order view them with something other than distaste.

Dirt Nap's cock sucking dream… Perhaps he was similarly bent? Though she had witnessed similar dreams by virile sires who were devoted to their herds. A little self-indulgence was not a bad thing, in a dream anyway.

Regardless it was her duty to encourage him in any rightful course that should make him happy — even if it made her ill to do so. She'd sworn an oath when taking the role of Councillor and he had been entrusted to her care with Dr. Cake's oversight. She closed her eyes and began sorting through her stock of dream mares. Selecting two earth mares she began reworking them so that they would be ready when she paid Dirt Nap a visit this evening.

She must test him before leaping to conclusions.

Noctilucent nursed a headache the next morning and was grateful she had the staff lounge to herself. She sipped at a mug of black, sweet coffee and worried that Tongue Pressor might come barrelling into the room at any moment. She could not deal with a head-spinning stream of happy chatter right now.

What had gone wrong?

Casting the dream walking spell took less effort and she'd appeared directly in front of Dirt Nap's coffin-lid door. The stallion wasn't dreaming when she arrived. She crafted the mares she had modernised from a cloud of grey dream-stuff, ready to be released when he began dreaming. They were rough and ready adaptations; their speech, mane styles, and attitudes shamelessly copied from her coworkers.

A lunch-time visit to Pink Cherry's provided the inspiration for their new garb: Filmy lingerie, bridles, and lace-trimmed saddles. Ponyville's adult-novelty shoppe was very interesting if somewhat embarrassing. It was lucky she was the sole customer as she couldn't help raising her tail and winking when she discovered an aisle of severed penises and cored vulva. Aroused horror gave way to fascination once she realised they were not real, but moulded from some fleshy substance. The Red Rocket was tempting and Bête Noire's length, girth, and spiked flare made her wince. It could make an amusing Hearth's Warming gift for Tia and she might get one or two others for herself since the Royal Harem had been disbanded centuries ago.

She rendered the mares mute to get around the language issue and kept the strong appetite for oral sex which had been part of their original motivation.

That seemed to be something Dirt Nap enjoyed.

Eager and confident, she'd jumped right in as his dream formed. But his reaction had been extremely negative! He froze in terror the moment Luna injected the sexy mares into his bedroom and when one had boldly reached between his hind legs while licking her lips he leapt to his hooves and fled!

Sexual psychology books in the hospital's library mentioned that modern stallions held a strong desire for a 'three-way.' Though servicing multiple mares had once been a common marital arrangement it had since become fetishised into an extremely desirable fantasy.

Not by Mr. Dirt Nap.

It had been all she could do to keep the dream from transforming into a true nightmare. She allowed him to escape, banished the mares, and guided his dream to become a canter through a peaceful forest.

To calm herself and make something of her evening, she visited several of Ponyville's younger residents. Foal's dreams were much simpler and their innocent play was a joy to partake in. The last was suffering a nightmare about eating too many cupcakes and growing obese, but that was easily dealt with. If nothing else she may have saved Pinkie Pie a customer.

She finished her coffee and sighed.

Maybe something more subtle for Dirt Nap's next dream? She hated crafting subtle dreams, they were so fiddly and in this case, she did not know what would work. Should she try a stallion? That might confirm or rule out if Dirt Nap was a pervert. If she did try a stallion, should he be motivated to play at mare or to be dominant? Rough work-pony clothing or feminine garb? Were there other modern roles and social cues? She knew nothing of how those types behaved with one another. And didn't really want to.

She wrinkled her nose and rinsed out her cup in the sink.

It was Monday and after a busy weekend the interns and much of the staff had the day off. Placing her mug on the drying rack she decided to spend the day free from trying to puzzle out the enigma of Dirt Nap as well. She would go forth amongst the town folk of Ponyville and try to relax, perhaps paying a visit the delightful cafe she'd passed on her way to the adult shoppe.

Fresh air, more coffee and a light meal would be just the thing for her flagging mood.

Sitting up in the street, Clickspring waved a hoof over his head to catch the attention of one of the barista ponies working in the Café Palomino. There was a multi-hued morning crowd of ponies between him and the counter, so didn't dare approach any closer. One of the crew of three ponies working their tails off behind the long counter noticed him, waved back and shouted, "The usual?"

Clickspring nodded and floated his bits over to the counter. One. At. A. Time. Then trotted off down an alleyway to a side door, bypassing the crowd up front and entering a faux living-room at the back of the coffee house. Complete with a crackling fireplace and scattering of comfy over-stuffed chairs and couches.

He spotted a certain gorgeous unicorn huddled up atop one of the recliners. She had a plate with a few bites of a croissant remaining and was nursing a tall mug of something frothy. Her flame coloured hair was down, no longer confined in a nurses' bun and half-draped over her eyes like Fluttershy.

Clickspring hesitated. He'd have to walk past her to get to the counter and he really just wanted to get his breakfast and head home. Complications were… complicated. But she looked sad and in pain so he paused and quietly said, "G'morning. Are you alright?"

Her beautiful cyan eyes looked bruised and from the way she was squinting in the morning light, she must have quite a headache.

"Stayed up late partying?"

She smiled and puffed some of her long forelocks up away from her face. "O-oh. N-no, Mr. Clickspring… Clicky. Good morrow… morning. I w-was up 'til the wee hours with study."

He nodded and said, "Ah, of course. How was your first week at the hospital?"

Noctilucent sipped her coffee and licked foam off her lips, a gesture that had him pawing at the carpet. "Umm… B-busy, but interesting. We… Ah, yes… We interns have this day free from work."

Clickspring had to lean in closer to hear her quiet, pained voice over the constant chatter from the crowd of ponies by the counter and the hiss and gurgle of coffee making. "Y'know, this isn't the best place to have a headache."

She smiled wanly at him and said, "Aye. I-it is rather loud, is it not? P-perhaps I will return to the hospital or s-seek a quiet corner in Golden Oak Library."

"I know a place that's much better than a stuffy library."

"Soy Earl Grey bubble tea an'a cranberry scone!"

"I'll be right back."

Clickspring trotted to the edge of the waiting crowd, stood up on his hind legs so he could see over their heads and snatched up the paper-bagged scone with his magic. He dropped to all fours and placed it on the loin of his back and then grabbed his tall glass tumbler of tea and tapioca.

He took a sip and trotted back to where Noctilucent reclined and said, "Follow me and bring your coffee." He pushed open the side door of the cafe, looked back and waved 'come on' with the blue tufted tip of his tail.

Noctilucent winced as the milk frother began hissing and gurgling like a dragon dying from severe intestinal distress. She snapped up the last bite of croissant, grabbed her mug, and gracefully slid off of the couch.

Clickspring smiled encouragingly as she joined him in the alleyway and he assured her, "It's not far."

They slowly ambled through the heart of Ponyville as it came to life, shops unlocking their doors and switching their sign boards to 'Open'. Fillies and colts chatted and laughed as they trotted off to school. Noctilucent walked with her head down and her ears pressed flat, only raising her head when Clicky lead her off of the street, through a gap in a hedge, and onto a grass lawn. The river flowed a few meters away at the foot of a gentle slope.

"Nearly there."

She started towards the picnic tables and benches by the river's edge, but he turned left and trotted towards a small hazel tree coppice.

"This way."

Pushing through the underbrush he led her into a small clearing that butted up against the river edge. With rows of lumpy trees on three sides, it was completely isolated from the bustle of Ponyville.

Clickspring stopped and waved a hoof. "Here we are. A nice, quiet place to deal with a headache."

With a grateful sigh, Noctilucent sank down to rest on the cool grass. She set her mug down on a flat rock. The river's burble drowned out the sounds of Ponyville's morning routine and was accompanied by the sounds of birds chirping and insects buzzing.

He felt strangely bashful, inviting her into this hidden place. It was like his own private garden and he'd given away its secret.

"Nopony ever comes here, so you shouldn't be disturbed."

"T-thank th… you, Clicky." Noctilucent's smile was a bit tight, he guessed from her headache, but she sounded relieved.

"You're welcome. I come here sometimes to think. Everypony needs a quiet place to get away, right?" Her ears flicked back and he realised she needed quiet, not some foal babbling at her. "Well, I'll leave you to it then. I have work to do. See you later."

She murmured, "Farewell."

He pushed through the brush and trotted to his workshop. There were gears to cut and temper, and Mr. Rich's watch to clean and adjust before lunch. Standing around, mooning over a pretty mare wouldn't get anything worthwhile done.

As the grass warmed against Noctilucent's belly it released a heavenly scent which made her tummy grumble. She couldn't resist snacking, just a little, and the plain but delicious fodder. It helped settle her sour coffee-shocked stomach. Once the mug was emptied she teleported it back to the cafe with a brief surge of magic and rose to her hooves.

She shook herself and waded into the river. The cool clear water rose up under her belly as she walked into deeper water down a silt-free gravel bar. She cast a simple detection spell and finding no observers she folded her legs, dunked her head, and dispelled her disguise. She spread her aching wings and slowly flapped them, swirling cold water through her feathers and, no doubt, stinky wing pits. It was impossible to get properly clean without first dispelling the unicorn disguise she'd been holding for days.

Cold water banished the last of her headache and a soaking but refreshed Luna strode back up the gravel bar to Clicky's hidden meadow. She shook vigorously, like a wet dog, flinging sprays of glittering water all around. A few swipes of telekinesis smoothed her coat and shoved damp mane away from her eyes. One of her wing joints popped as she stretched them, making her wince and groan in relief. Holding them close for several days had not been pleasant.

The princess spent a few undignified minutes grooming her sore wings, seeking but not finding any loose primaries. Her wings were merely stiff and sore where a pegasus would doubtless have had serious complications to deal with.

Checking once more that none could see her, she crouched, spread her massive blue wings and exploded up into the sky!

Gaining altitude as quickly as she could with wing and magic, she shot through the clouds like a bolt from a crossbow. Levelling out far above Ponyville she sighed happily and swooped in a huge arc with her light blue mane and tail streaming out behind. The last dampness in her coat and her wet mane and tail quickly dried in the thinner air.

It was many weeks since she'd last taken to the sky, not since her flight to Twilight's library when she left Canterlot. She flew south, away from Ponyville and over the wild forest of Everfree. She steered well clear of Cloudsdale for she had no desire to be mobbed by curious pegasi.

She flew back and forth over the forest in an aimless pattern with her mind also set adrift. After an hour of so, she had a sudden flash of inspiration: she could recruit somepony with more experience with modern etiquette to aid her with poor Dirt Nap. Somepony who may be able to confirm or refute her suspicion of the earth stallion's perversion. Nay, his preference, she admonished herself.

She had just the pony in mind.

She dove toward Ponyville and as she approached the edge of town she teleported directly from the cloud deck to a clearing just inside the forest. Her hooves threw up clods of grass and dirt as she skidded to a halt. Feeling much refreshed she tucked her wings and re-cast the Noctilucent guise. A basic grooming spell untangled her mane and tail.

Noctilucent found a trail which led to a dirt road. She cantered along it and into the fairgrounds on the west side of town. A herd of colts and fillies played with a hoofball during their lunch break and a few farmer took a break from their fields to sell fresh produce. Apples, oranges, cherries, fruit pies and the like. She stopped to buy a bag of Macintosh apples from the orange earth pony named Applejack, another of the Element bearers. The mare was solidly built, well muscled, and smelled of sweat from hauling her waggon. Her forthright manner and simple dialect were a welcome contrast to the confusing babble of her fellow interns.

She bought a pair of small cherry pies from another merchant, thinking they would be nice to share with Pearl and Pressor. They also balanced the apples when she tied the handles of the bags together and draped them over her back.

She stopped to peer in the window of Rarity's Carousel Boutique to admire the seamstress' work. Not that Noctilucent would ever need such garments but it was fun to look all the same. 'Window shopping' they called it. A rare modern term that actually made some sense, once you realised that buying panes of glass wasn't the purpose. It was remarkable such a small town had produced most of the Element bearers and she felt her sister's gently meddling hoof behind it.

She ambled through town, past ponies at work and ponies at play.

It was a lovely and calm day, though plaques hung from hooks on the town hall announced that there was an early evening shower scheduled.

Clickspring's shop was at the north edge of town. A simple square building of grey stone with one wall against the river bank. Water poured from an aqueduct, turning the huge wooden wheel on the back of the mill. A brass plaque on one of its rough-cut stone walls said the mill was built only fifty years ago, though it looked much older. Its wheel froze solid in winter and so it had been replaced by a year-round water and wind-powered mill across town.

She trotted around to the front. It had a large bay window with black framework around the square panes and a sign over the window declared, '~Clickspring Clockworks~', and in minuscule script, 'Timepieces, Toys, Novelties, and Fine Tools.'

Noctilucent peered through the window and saw a range of mantle, lantern, cuckoo and floor clocks on display. Most were old and refurbished while only a few looked new. Shelves and tables held small timer clocks shaped like fruit, music boxes, and… a toy train!

Shortly after her return, Tia took her on a tour of Equestria and they'd taken a steam train to Manehattan. Luna sneaked out of the Royal Carriage, away from the travelling court, and spent the journey riding in the steam engine's cab. She had thoroughly enjoyed the racket, the heat and soot from the firebox, the wheels' metallic shrieks, and of course pulling on the whistle chain whenever the flustered engineers were not looking.

Trains were amazeballs!

There were other foal's wind-up toys, compasses, sextants, measuring tools, and complex devices that she couldn't put a name to.

Before she was banished, Luna had enjoyed designing siege engines, construction cranes, and equipment used in mining. She had spent many hours gazing at the complex insides of the rare and expensive timekeepers that she and her sister owned. Far cruder machines than the ones Clickspring had on display. The orderly motion was much like the stars she once shepherded.

The shop's green door had many layers of lumpy peeling paint and creaked as she pushed it open. She jumped and flattened her ears as loud metal bells gonged overhead as she entered. She looked up through her mane with wide eyes and saw a machine hung over the door, with rows of metal tubes being tapped by little felt hammers. A brass cylinder covered in pegs slowly spun while clockwork parts of the machine whirred and clicked.

"Coming! Won't be a moment!"

Clickspring's voice came through an open doorway at the back of the shop's showroom, curtained off with dangling rows of blue-tinted glass beads and brass gears.

Noctilucent closed the door and watched the musical mechanism slow to a stop. Its last bong faded and her ears rotated around, picking up quick ticking and clicking from the other devices scattered around the showroom. Having already seen the ones in the window, she wandered past a long glass case at the back of the room. She wondered how such small clockworks, barely large enough to fill one's hoof, could accurately keep time. Some displayed the day of the week. Some even showed phases of her Moon!

Something seemed off with one of the antique silver pocket watches. She squinted and realised that the Moon in its display wasn't tarnished and lacked the pitted outline of the Mare in the Moon. Somepony, likely Clickspring, had updated it.

If only it were so easy to fix herself.

"Sorry to keep you waiting, I was-" Beads clicked sharply against one another as Clickspring pushed through the curtain. He hesitated and then smiled when he saw Noctilucent. "Oh, hello again, Counsellor. How's your head?"

She swallowed a painful lump in her throat before answering. "I-I'm much better now. Th-thank thee, these, uh, these machines of your's are amazeballs!" She waved a hoof, taking in the whole shop and grinned a bit too widely. Her eyes and nose felt moist and she blinked rapidly while sniffling.

Thankfully, Clickspring didn't notice how close she was to blubbering like a schoolfilly. "Oh, thanks! I, uh, well most of these aren't my work, to be honest. Just pieces I've restored." He pointed at the mechanism that hung over the door. "That greeting chime is one of mine and some of the music boxes, oh, and a few of the clocks of course. Can't be a clockmaker if you don't make clocks, right?"

She nodded and followed as he trotted to the inside of the bay window, where he pointed at some of the foal's toys.

"I redesign the mechanism in these walking ducks and built a smoke emitter for this wind-up train. It needs work, but I have it more-or-less running. I need to find a lower viscosity oil and I'll have to use a finer atomiser jet, which of course means changing the pressure chamber size and rebuilding the gear system to compensate for the lower torque required. The spring drum isn't strong enough with the current gear train anyway and I think the pivot bearings are shot so they're wasting a lot of… Uh…"

Noctilucent hadn't seen Clickspring this animated before and while she didn't understand everything he was babbling about, it was pleasant to see him expressing a genuine interest in something.

She tried to encourage him a little. "It makes smoke? S-surely not with fire! You couldn't t-trust a little one with a machine that had a fire within its belly, could you?"

She reached into the window display with a cloven hoof to push the train gently along its short segment of track. A small puff of fake smoke chuffed out of its chimney. "Oh! Tis not hot to the t-touch at all! How d-does it do that?" She smiled up at him through the long bangs of mane that hung over her face.

Clickspring looked a bit surprised for a moment and inhaled deeply, and then blew it out making his lips flap. "Well… That's, uh… That's what I was…" He huffed and said, "It's like a perfume sprayer. There's a little cylinder to generate pressure which forces vegetable oil through an atomiser and sprays it up the chimney. No fire needed. But it clogs easily and the wind-up mechanism isn't really strong enough. It's a work in progress."

Not having to fake her interest in trains, Noctilucent slid the toy back and forth a few more times. The similarity of shape between the long red cylindrical engine and certain parts of a stallion's anatomy sprang to mind and she felt her ears flush. She stroked the engine back and forth a few more times while reminiscing about her last lover: Thunderbolt, a robust pegasus stallion in the Two-Sisters castle guard.

Dear Tia always complained that she left him too sore and feeble, and his rattling armour annoyed her when he stood watch outside her own bed chamber. Twas his own fault for not joining the Royal harem. One couldn't service The Night and also stand guard during the day.

What ever happened to Thunder?

"Would you like a cup of tea?" Clickspring's voice cracked on the last word.

Noctilucent's nose wrinkled and she stood up, reluctantly abandoning her train of thought. "Tea? No, t-thank th… you."

"Coffee? I have a new Fancy Press that I could break in for you."

Though she had no idea what a 'Fancy Press' was, she nodded and whispered, "C-coffee would be nice, thank you." Sharing a beverage together would give her a chance to get to know him a little better and to sound him out regarding poor Dirt Nap.

"I'll be back in a few minutes."

The bead curtain swung and clicked after he'd left and she was tempted to stay and play with the train, but sinking further into wistful memories wouldn't help with the present. She stepped through the curtain and into his workshop.

Three-stories tall, the open room took up most of the space inside the mill. Windows up high near the thick wood beams were open, letting in a watery breeze and shafts of light which did little to light the gloomy space. The thumping, gurgling, and splashing of the water wheel was much louder here and its axle shaft spun slowly though the huge gears were still. They linked to other shafts running vertically and horizontally overhead, with drooping belts hanging down to chunky machines scattered around the workshop.

Gears and springs and partially assembled mechanisms cluttered a motley assortment of work benches and shelves. Clocks of all shapes and sizes in varying states of disrepair hung on the walls. Some ticking but most were still and silent.

She spotted Clickspring's tawny tail with its blue tufted tip disappearing through an open doorway to her left. She followed him, past a stairway which went up to the second floor and through the door, into a small kitchen.

It was a bit more rustic than was typical even in Ponyville, with an unfinished wood table, two chairs, a wood-fired stove, a counter with a sink and water faucet, and rows cabinets and shelves. It wasn't much but it was clean and well stocked with pots, pans, knives and other cooking necessities. She saw the side of a grassy hill next to the mill through a large square-paned window over the table.

The one luxury the kitchen had was a wall clock with a face made of colourful glass flowers, it looked more like a bouquet than a timekeeper. A pair of gem encrusted hummingbirds moved slowly over the flowers, marking the hours and minutes.

Clickspring stood up on his hind legs at the kitchen's sink, grasping the wood handle of a cast iron kettle in his mouth. He must have spotted her reflection in the small window over the sink, because he glanced over his shoulder at her and plunked the kettle down in the sink.

"Oh, uh, welcome to my kitchen. You may as well come in and have a seat."

Noctilucent lifted her shopping bags off her back and set them on the floor. "T-thanks. I h-hope you don't mind my intrusion but I thought we might talk while you work."

"Alright." He turned away to fill the kettle. "What's on your mind?"

"N-nothing, really. I m-merely wish to get to know you better."

"Oh." He sounded disappointed.

Once the kettle was filled he closed the lid and ponyhandled it with mouth and fore hooves onto the stove. A cupboard opened and he levitated out a small cylindrical glass carafe with a mesh plunger inside.

Setting it down on the counter he grinned, waved a hoof and said, "Behold! Le Fancy Press."

"La cafetière à piston." Noctilucent chuckled at his pout and said, "S-sorry, I have seen one of these Fancy Presses before." At a pleasant bistro in dismal Manehattan.

He grunted and set about rinsing a small white teapot in the sink.

Noctilucent slid into one of the chairs though she would have preferred a cushion on the floor or that nice soft couch in Clickspring's shop. Ponies these days were sitting more often than reclining and she was determined to get used to the awkwardness of it.

With difficulty, she managed to slide her long tail between the rungs on the chair's back. She could feel them bumping into either side of her dock as she wiggled, pinning it uncomfortably in place.

Clicky bustled about, getting cups, saucers, spoons, bags of coffee and tea. His slender figure moved in a graceful, almost mare-ish way, and she had a difficult time imagining why a stallion who mated with other stallions would be attracted to him.

Why not just take a mare instead?

He only ever levitated one item at a time and kept his eyes on it while it floated through the air. His mangled horn shot a few sparks when he picked up a small covered pot with a wood handle sticking through the lid.

"I don't have milk or shugar but there's honey if that's okay." The pot wobbled through the air and he set it down at her end of the table.

"Ti… This is fine, thank you. I like it black and s-sweet."

Several quiet minutes of boiling, grinding, and mixing later they were both settled at the table with a cup of their favourite brews: sweet black coffee for Noctilucent and plain tea for Clickspring.

There was also a small tin of biscuits.

Nibbling on a vanilla cream and sipping her coffee Noctilucent had to admit it was a decent-tasting brew, though not as seductively delicious as her frappa-mocha-thing from this morning. Perhaps there was something to be said for having cow lactation in one's coffee. Clicky seemed content to sit quietly and enjoy his tea and her company, and she wasn't sure how to broach telling him about her plan. In the past, she had merely to declare a command and guards would march, castles would fall or be constructed, or somepony would lose their head. Somehow this was more difficult.

As Luna she might be able to lead a nation, but Counsellor Noctilucent was not a princess and had little power to command respect and expect obedience. That she needed to beg for assistance in matters of perversion that made her skin crawl did not help.

She shifted on the hard chair and tried to wiggle her tail into a better position. She must look a bit foalish.

"Would you like a cushion? Or, well, the washroom is upstairs." Clickspring waved a hoof in a vague gesture at the ceiling.

Damn. She did look a proper fidgety filly.

"N-no, we just… I mean, I want to discuss something… d-delicate in nature. I'm not certain where to begin." She struggled to keep her ears perked up politely as they annoyingly kept trying to fold.

Clickspring grimaced and set his cup down. "Delicate in nature? Did Nurse Redheart write everything I babbled about in my file? I'm sorry but she caught me at a bad time and-"

"While s-she was quite… detailed, it is not regarding you. Not exactly."

His ears perked up a little and he asked, "What's it about then? It can't be as embarrassing at the perverted song Pinkie sang and we made it through that. Though I thought poor Dirt Nap was going to melt into the couch."

They both chuckled. Not that she had fared much better. Pinkie Pie was a silly, lewd and utterly un-self-conscious pony.

"W-well, nae, no it's nothing that b-bad. I hope. But actually, it is about D-Dirt Nap."

"Ah, so this isn't just a social call." His ears perked up and he leaned his elbows on the table. "What can I do to help?"

She nodded and said, "F-forgive me but his problem s-seems the most pressing of everypony in the group and I must admit I am at a loss. His patient file is very thin and m-my own limited experience with young s-stallions sheds no light upon his situation." A half lie, as she had several centuries of experiencing stallions behind her, but whatever caused Dirt Nap's distress was plainly something she couldn't easily treat with a dream or two.

"Y-your patient file led me to believe that th- you may have wisdom that is relevant. Do you mayha- maybe have any thoughts about Dirt Nap that you would be willing to s-share?"

Clickspring scratched his short chin beard, slowly running his cloven hooves through the shiny blue hair. After a few moments, he slowly said, "He's scared of sex and I'd be surprised if he's not a virgin. Hanging out with mares and getting laid would probably fix that pretty quick. Unless he's not into mares."

Noctilucent nodded. "Y-yes, you echo my own diagnosis and possible treatment. I-it's that last part I wished to discuss with you since you are…" She waved a hoof at him. "The way you are."

He smirked and dryly said, "A gnob gobbler."

She barked a laugh and her magic wavered, sloshing a little coffee onto the table. Pressing a hoof over her muzzle to hide her grin she muttered, "S-sorry. I just-"

"No, I'm sorry. That was rude and I shouldn't badger you about something you're obviously not comfortable with. If it's any consolation I'm actually bi. I like mares as well."

She pouted a little as she sipped from her cup. It only made her more curious as to why he'd only pursued relations with other stallions.

"You're from a small town, like Dirt Nap?" he asked.

"Y-yes, a little village in the Unicorn Range."

He drank from his cup and said, "I figured. Then you know what ponies from small town are like."

She cocked an eyebrow and asked, "Small towns breed small minds?"

Clickspring winced and set his cup down. "I wouldn't say that. But they cling to tradition and teach their foals that there's only one right way to be in love. My point is, that even if Nap swings that way he might not have figured it out or be too scared to admit it."

"I hoped you might s-sense if he were…" She grimaced as it took her a moment to remember the medical term, "Homosexual."

"No, sorry. It's not like we all have gayscry or something."

"Oh! B-but I have purchased that spell, though I don't s-seem able to cast it correctly." She'd found it on a rack of scrolls at Pink Cherry's, amongst spells design to prolong intercourse and inhibit fertility.

Clickspring snorted in surprise and started laughing. Loud braying laughter.

Noctilucent sat up, cocked her head to one side and looked curiously through her bangs as he snorted and giggled. "P-pray tell what amuses you so."

"Y-you know that spell…" He caught his breath and wiped a tear from his eye. "That spell is just a novelty. A joke. It just picks up a pony's sex, tribe, and hide colour, then make up rude nonsense."

Noctilucent's mouth formed an 'o' shape for a moment.

She snickered and said, "This explains the c-crude things it reported about the ponies I tried it upon. I s-suspected it was false when it informed me that the school marm enjoyed… some very perverse activities. I have grave doubts that s-such a mare would be entrusted with educating the young."

"You'd be surprised just how kinky a normal looking pony can be."

She wouldn't actually. But the shy pony she was pretending to be? Yes, 'she' would be quite a sheltered creature. She faked a gasp and said, "Y-you mean… You believe she truly doth- does questionable things with fresh fruit?"

Clickspring grunted and said, "No! Maybe. Look, I don't even know Cheerilee. My point is that anypony could secretly be a Kinkie Pie and it doesn't matter. Shouldn't matter. Not to anypony they're not sleeping with, anyway."

Noctilucent sipped her coffee, swallowed and said, "I-I'm not certain I agree." One had to consider what was best for one's community and Equestria, after all. If every pony engaged in perversion who would sire and rear the next generation?

"You are living in s-solitude?" she asked, hoping to bring the topic around to how he might aid her with Dirt Nap.

"Yeah. It's been a couple of years since my last relationship kind of fizzled out and became just a friendship. He moved out after he met somepony new." He smirked. "Now days I'm by-myself-sexual."

Noctilucent nodded, she had read as much in Clickspring's file. "You've always had relations with other s-stallions, have you not?"

Clickspring frowned and said, "So? What are you getting at? Being bi isn't just about who you sleep with, y'know."

"I was wondering if p-perhaps Dirt Nap could use a role model if he is homosexual or bisexual like yourself. M-maybe if you were to discuss your relationships at the next-"

Shaking his head violently he cut her off. "For buck's sake, no! I'm no role model! Are you kidding me? Nap would become a hermit if he thought screwed up relationships like I've had were what he could look forward to."

"Bollocks!"

Clickspring jerked upright in his chair and his face was so shocked that it was difficult to not laugh at him. She had almost slipped and used the Royal Voice, but the masking spell had held and dampened her outburst down to something approaching a normal pony's speaking level. Fortunately, even at that volume, it had been enough to get his attention and shut down his intolerable whinging.

Realising that she'd slipped out of character, she pressed her hooves over her mouth and gasped. "Oh d-dear. P-please forgive my outburst, Mr. Clickspring."

"Uh, ok…?"

"It's just…" She sighed, placed her hooves on the table again and said, "F-few would remain in a wholly t-terrible relationship. Even abusive ponies have some s-spark of joy betwixt them which binds them together, for good or ill. You were with some of your, ah, p-partners for many years and from what I read in your file you did enjoy your first Festival."

Clickspring finished off his tea and nodded. "Yeah, I guess so."

"Could you not s-speak of your first Festival at the next session? I think it would balance out Miss Pie's tale of d-debauchery and subtly show Dirt Nap that there are, ah, other ways. M-maybe that's all he needs. A little encouragement."

Clickspring stared glumly into his empty cup, then nodded and said, "Okay. Seems like the least I can do, I suppose."

The teapot and Fancy Press levitated up, held in Noctilucent's magic as she poured each of them a fresh cup. "Thank th… Uh, thank you. Talking with the others s-should help you also. I-it is what the group sessions are for after all."

He shrugged and said nothing.

One of Noctilucent hoof toes tapped quietly on the table, marking time much like a ticking clock. After a few moments, she said, "You do need to s-speak up about that which trouble you, Clicky. Silence d-does ach… does nothing to help. We cannot give you counsel if you s-stay silent."

Clickspring grumbled, "Yeah, I know. It's not easy talking about it and I've gotten used to being alone." He waved a hoof vaguely at himself, "I'm comfortably broken I guess and I doubt that talking about it will make any difference."

"T-that is why talking about it is needed. You've don't see any way forwards where other ponies may. For example, have you tried dating a mare?"

Choking on half swallowed tea Clickspring gasped, "W-what?"

"Dating a mare. You s-said you are interested and yet you have only been with other stallions…" She leaned forward, resting her elbows on the table and blinking her big pretty eyes. "I-if you are truthfully bisexual, p-perhaps seeking a relationship with a mare would be… a good change?"

Clickspring set his teacup with a loud rattle on its saucer while his face and ears heated up, "Ahh, well, ah… I have thought about it. But…"

"But, what?" Noctilucent reached across the table and picked out one of the long vanilla cream biscuits from the cookie tin.

Clickspring's ears flattened back against his head as he watched Noctilucent, looked away and then looked back again. "It's not like I haven't tried. But I'm not athletic or suave, and once a mare spots this thing-", he gestured at the crooked spiral on his forehead, "-it's game over. I have a cute butt, apparently, so dating studs is at least possible. Was possible. Nopony would want an old, broken shut-in like me."

Holding the cookie to her muzzle she licked and nibbled delicately on one end and watched poor Clickspring's face turn quite an interesting shade of reddish bronze.

Clickspring hid his eyes behind a folded leg and groaned, "Please stop doing that."

Fighting to keep a giggle out of her voice Noctilucent said, "Stop d-doing what?"

It was rather amusing to tease the uptight fellow and she now had proof of his interest in mares rather than just his declaration of it. There was also a little sinful pleasure in knowing that she was attractive, albeit while wearing a disguise.

Clickspring let out an annoyed grunt and scooted out of his chair, snatching up his cup in one foreleg. He stiffly walked on three legs to the sink, keeping his back to Noctilucent. After pouring out the dregs he stood with his fore hooves on the counter and stared out the window.

She rolled her eyes and bit the end off of her cookie.

He muttered, "I guess you forgot about the Curse?"

"Hmm? What c-curse?"

"You read my file! I didn't go to Festival, so of course I have the blasted Curse. It could've been Dr. Cake on the other side of the table flirting with me and this would've happened." He took a deep breath, exhaled and said, "No offence but he's not my type."

Oh! Oh, she felt like a hayhead.

There was no mention in his file about the Festival Curse but she should have known he would be suffering from it. That ancient event, far older than even she was, took cruel revenge upon those who refused to attend. A little teasing should have amused both of them, not induce a painful erection. The Curse's amplified response was much more dramatic than she'd intended.

Noctilucent felt her own ears grow warm with embarrassment and shame. After chasing the dry cookie down with a swallow of coffee she said, "You are right, I ha-had forgotten."

Still looking out the window while waiting for things between his legs to settle down Clickspring said, "Well… You're an intern and I guess mistakes will happen when somepony goes from theory to dealing with messy ponies in their natural habitats. Right?"

He looked over his shoulder at her and Noctilucent grimaced, her nose wrinkling as she nodded.

Clickspring turned away from the window and dropped down onto all four hooves, his arousal subdued and everything safely stowed, he walked over to the table and smiled warily at Noctilucent. "Alright then, no harm done. But tea break's over and I'd better get back to work."

"Oh! M-may I watch?"

Having secured Clickspring's assistance with her plans there really wasn't any need to tarry longer, but it would be nice to have a poke around his fascinating workshop. It was her day off so she should do something outside the hospital grounds while she had the chance.

She gulped the last swallows of coffee.

Clickspring's head cocked to one side as he looked at her and said, "Sure, though you might find it kind of boring. I just tempered some steel parts and I have lots and lots of boring polishing to get through. It won't be exciting to watch. You're welcome to look around the shop though."

"Wonderful!"

Noctilucent quickly cleared the table in a burst of magic; levitating her empty mug, teapot, Fancy Press, and various saucers and spoons to the sink. The lid hopped up onto the honey pot, the cookie tin was shut and both were sent back to their places on the counter.

He watched her display of magical prowess from the corner of his eyes, with his head tipped to one side and a slight frown on his muzzle. He grumbled, "Thank you", and walked out of the kitchen.

Noctilucent trotted after him, her eyes gleaming as she looked around at the fascinating machines. Clickspring stopping to fetch a workpony's smock from a hook on the wall. He sat on his haunches, tying it around himself as she walked over to an ancient-looking wood shelf and looked over the strange clockwork devices stowed in random disarray.

Some were clean and new looking, others clearly quite old and covered with tarnish and dirt from years of use and neglect. Many were plain timekeepers, a few music box engines, a tiny loom, and many things that she couldn't imagine the purpose of. Perhaps if they weren't in pieces, but to her inexperienced eye, they were mere frameworks with random gears, springs, bells and levers.

Clickspring hopped up onto a tall stool next to one of the benches and fished small parts out of a glass jar filled with murky yellow oil. He levitated them one by one to a pile of rags and used his hooves to wipe the oil and some melted white crud off them.

Noctilucent found a small model of a unicorn colt sitting at a school desk with a ratty looking feather pen tucked between his cloven hoof toes. The tip hovered over the desk's top. The poor colt's fabric hide was mostly rotted away, exposing the gear-y gore of his inner workings. It was beautiful and repulsive at the same time.

Clickspring hopped down from his stool, carrying a small tray with some of the cleaned parts on it. Small screws, clock hands and an assortment of gears and levers. He stopped near Noctilucent and watched her use a hoof to gingerly poke at the unicorn automaton, making its pen-holding leg wiggle.

"He writes Iffilian poems but I have a lot to do before he'll be presentable again."

Noctilucent smiled over her shoulder at him, "I-I'm sure he will appreciate it. Do you mostly do repair work?"

Clickspring set his tray of parts down on a small circular table. A thick slice sawn from an oak's trunk with a flat slate embedded in the top, surrounded by holes. They were filled with an assortment of files, picks, and rolls of grit paper.

Hopping up onto a short stool next to the table he nodded, "Yes, I've learned a lot working on other pony's pieces. I have been designing and making my own for a few years."

Clickspring drizzled some water on the stone, selected a sheet of very fine but strong abrasive and stuck it down in the puddle, then applied more water. He flipped the magnifying lenses on his glasses down, plucked a gear from the tray and examined it for a moment before starting to polish it. Smooth and even swirling strokes with his magic, pressing just hard enough to remove the tempering scale.

Noctilucent wandered over to one of the belt-driven machines, which she guess was used for drilling holes. A tool similar to a unicorn's horn, with sharp-looking flutes at the tip, pointed down to a small metal table with a hole in it. The squat machine next to it held a disk made of stone and another of metal bristles.

They would not look out of place in a torture oubliette.

A pedal that reminded her of the 'deadpony' switch on the train engine stuck out from the base of the drilling machine. She stepped on it to see what might happen.

Her ears flattened at a loud bang and the room came alive with a mechanical roar that shook dust from the rafters! The belt hanging down to the machine snapped into motion. Eyes wide with alarm and fascination she leaned closer as the horn-like tool rapidly spun like a top and slowly lowered toward the table.

She felt a something grab her around the withers and her leg was snatched away from the pedal!

Yanked sideways and unbalanced she tumbled to the floor, crashing into Clickspring and sending him flailing across the room on his back. He squealed in pain as the mills drive shafts slowed and the machines clattered to a halt.

Wiggling on the cold flagstones, Noctilucent rolled over onto her belly and cursed, "By Grogar's culs! Hath thou taken leave of thy senses?" She snorted angrily before spotting Clickspring curled up on the floor, gasping for air with his forelegs pressed down between his thighs.

"C-Clicky! Art… Are you injured?" There was no scent of blood.

Clickspring groaned and opened his eyes, looked over at her and choked out, "Don't touch me."

She blinked in surprise and withdrew her hoof. She gingerly stood up and frowned at the dirty streaks on her white flank. A few strokes with her magic removed most of it while Clickspring groaned, rolled over and shakily stood up. His glasses were missing but he didn't appear injured at all.

Noctilucent glared at him. "W-why in Equestria did you dare lay hooves upon U… Upon m-me?"

He panted for a few moments with his head down, standing on shaky legs with the hind ones spread awkwardly. He looked up at her with watery eyes and whined, "D-do you know what happens to ponies who get their mane caught in a drill press? If they're lucky they just get their scalp torn off."

She blinked a few times and murmured, "Oh. I… I d-don't believe I was in any danger."

He shuffled past the polishing table and said, "Machines are unforgiving. When I was a colt I almost lost a hoof to a lathe I was sure was set up correctly." He hobbled over to a lever that jutted out of the wall, grasped it in his forelegs and grunted as he shoved it down.

"I should've disengaged the wheel before letting you loose in here."

He slowly sat and hunched over, closed his eyes and whimpered.

Noctilucent's fury at being so rudely ponyhandled ebbed and she walked a few steps toward him. "You're in pain? D-did you injure yourself when you fell?"

Clickspring opened one eye to look warily at her and he shook his head. "Not really, no. The Curse hits me hard if I touch somepony." He shifted gingerly and muttered, "Feels like my apples have been bucked."

She nibbled her lower lip. "I'm s-sorry. Is that a-anything I can do? I know of a s-spell which will relieve any pain but it would require I t-touch you."

He grimaced, "No. No, thank you, anyway." His horn flashed and threw off a few sparks. Moments later his glasses sailed up from a corner of the room and settled, slightly askew, on his muzzle.

"I just need to lie down for a while." He waved a hoof towards the shop's entrance and groaned, "Would you mind seeing yourself out?"

She nodded and walked past him, careful not to accidentally brush him with her long tail. She popped into the kitchen to snatch her shopping bags and draped them over her back, then stopped to look at Clickspring. She opened her mouth to apologise again but he cut her off.

"Don't worry, we're still friends. It's my own fault for leaving the clutch engaged… and that I'm cursed."

Noctilucent frowned and shook her head. "I'm your c-counsellor, not your friend. That would be… i-improper."

Clickspring squinted at her, in pain or perhaps disbelief. It was her turn to wince. She'd barged into his home, invited herself to coffee and an intimate chat, teased him by fellating a cookie, then practically hoofed him in the culs. She'd been a terrible guest in his home, yet he still wished to be friends.

She had to say no.

There were rules against such overly intimate relations with patients. Nurses and doctors were not allowed to grow too close to their patients — just as officers must not fraternise with the common soldier. Friendly, but not friends.

He shrugged and said, "Right, well… Thank you for coming by, Counsellor."

"Will I s-see you at the group session? You'll s-speak about your first Festival?" She had to secure at least that much.

He nodded and she reluctantly turned to go.

She stepped outside, ears flat as the horrid chime gonged its simple music over her head. The sun had given way to overcast and a gust whipped strands of mane across her eyes. Annoyed, she shoved it back with a hoof and looked up. Ponyville's small weather team were hard at work, herding dark clouds together.

There should be time to pay a visit to Mistress Sparkle before the rain fell.

Clickspring hobbled to the door, twisted the lock, and flipped the sign over to 'Closed'.

He peered through the window as Noctilucent glanced up at the sky, then quickly trotted off toward Ponyville. Watching her hips sway made his already painful erection throb.

He turned away from the window with a gasp, stumbled up the stairs to the second floor and into the bathroom. His balls ached and his bladder felt near to bursting, but trying to piss through a hard dick was almost impossible. He had to get rid of it! He untied his work smock, crumpled it up into a ball of dirty fabric and tossed out the bathroom door. At least it had kept the Counsellor from seeing his shameful condition.

Standing up on his hind legs he turned the shower head so that it pointed at the white tiles that surrounded the tub. A dribble of clear fluid seeped from him as he leaned into the tub to twist the hot and cold taps. He stuck a hoof into the spray and made adjustments until the water was a reasonable temperature.

After climbing awkwardly into the tub he sat for a few minutes with his eyes closed. The cool porcelain-coated metal felt nice against his aching balls. He yanked the curtain closed and steam from the shower, still pointed at the tiles, began to fill the enclosed space.

He opened his eyes, shoved a bottle of shampoo to one side and snatched out the bottle of lube hidden behind it. Flicking the lid open he squeezed a dollop of clear jelly onto his right pastern and fetlock.

The bottle clattered against the tub as he discarded it. He stroked his slippery foreleg along his cock, smearing the slippery goo on its vein-y length. His cock and balls were a slightly darker blue than his mane. It look like freshly blued steel with a coat of shiny lube. As he caressed himself with a shaking leg, he felt very little: a tugging sensation that lifted his aching balls from the bathtub's floor when he stroked upwards; a little pain when they plopped back down; a vague sense of pressure where he squeezed the shaft; and worse pressure from his distended bladder.

With a grunt he got up on three legs, and slowly pumped the pastern of his right leg along his blue erection.

What should he fantasise about?

He wanted to get this chore over and done with so he could take a piss and go lie down, so it should be something that went straight to the business, nothing romantic.

The 'black dog' fantasy would do.

In his mind's eye pictured a svelte, black diamond dog bitch — not that he'd ever met one but he'd seen pictures. He imagined her bent over, tail in the air, presenting and ready to go. He'd been around dogs often enough to know what they looked like when they were in heat and he imagined that a diamond dog's pussy would be similar. He licked his lips while fantasising about licking her, probing his tongue inside the soft black skin of her snatch, making her whine with desire.

When he imagined jumping up onto her and slipping the bone inside, he crushed the head of his cock with his trembling leg, not even noticing the hard hoof edge digging in. There was merely a tickle of sensation from his urethra. He imagined driving deeper into her and slid his leg further back, losing even that. There was just a sensation of pulling at his groin and his balls swinging.

He humped his leg, concentrating on the lust he felt for the concept of mating with a female he could never hope to actually impregnate — but having a damn good try at it anyway. Something about that pushed his buttons, that and the sensation of his aching balls bouncing off of his foreleg and hoof while imagining them smacking into her backside.

After a few minutes of frantic humping, gasping, and panting, rope-y strands of white cum shot out. "Ow! Ow, ow, ow", he hissed through clenched teeth as each convulsion caused a burst of pain from his blue balls.

His tail flexed up and down with each squirt and the clenching in his gut forced a long, burbling squeak out of his ass.

Gasping and laughing at the fart he let go of his cock, his hooves making a loud clattering in the tub as he shifted his balance. After a few more twitches and squirts, his cock started to go soft, the flared head shrinking back to normal as it retreated back into his sheath.

He snorted unhappily and shoved his face under the stream of hot water. As usual, he felt weary and disgusted after an orgasm.

Trying to distract himself, he scooped up the bottle of lube and shoved it back into hiding. Careful not to step in the long puddle of cum, he reached up and angled the shower head so that it washed over the mess and sent it down the drain. A few quick swipes with a hoof loosened strands that were stuck to the tub and got it clean enough for now.

He slid the loop of a scrub brush over the hoof, squirted some of the lilac scented shampoo onto it, and started scrubbing his chest fur. Suds trickled down his belly and over his sheath. He grit his teeth as the soap stung his pee hole. His balls continued to ache, but no where near as badly and he knew from experience that it would soon fade.

Noctilucent's teasing and having to grab her wouldn't have hurt so much if it hadn't been so long since he'd 'cleared the pipes'. Abstinence put the Curse on a hair trigger.

But he detested having to do it.

"Public Service. Check!"

"Dream Walking. Check!"

Twilight Sparkle hummed a cheerful note as she set the scroll down on the table. It felt so satisfying to draw that simple check mark in bright green ink, even if the long list of tasks weren't hers.

She looked across the table at Noctilucent and asked, "What about 'Open Moon Channel'? Have you made any progress with that?"

Noctilucent shook her head. "Nae, not yet. But the trickle of power waxes with every Walk."

Twilight nodded, glanced at the list and asked, "'Make Friends'?"

Her own research into friendship was proceeding well and she was certain that it would be a key factor in the Princesses' rehabilitation. Nothing helped build a sense of community as a close friendship or two… or five.

Noctilucent sighed and shook her head, "Busy are my days and nights an' the only ponies I have spoken with are my fellows at the hospital or patients." She looked like she was going to say something further, but after a moment's hesitation she closed her mouth and frowned.

"Is something wrong, Pri-", she caught herself and scrunched her muzzle for a moment. "Noctilucent?"

Her magically whispery voice took on a low, raspy quality that made the mane on the back of Twilight's neck stand on end. "Many mistakes have I made this past week, Mistress Sparkle. Troubling mistakes."

Twilight Sparkle gulped and asked, "W-what kind of mistakes?" She hoped it wasn't an early warning that Nightmare Moon might return.

"I was in the Room of Emergencies when an injured pegasus was brought to us. The bones in his forelegs were shattered, making them a bloody pulp."

Twilight shuddered.

"He was left in my charge while a doctor was sought and I forgot all I have learned of first aid." Noctilucent's eyes went distant and she muttered, "Twas the blood and his gurgling cries of anguish. I felt I stood once more upon a blood-soaked field and could smell corpses, hear the flies buzzing and caws of crows circling o'r head."

This was way out of Twilight's comfort zone and she squirmed as bile crept up the back of her throat. She desperately wanted the Princess to stop talking.

"When a doctor finally arrived I was preparing for amputation and would not have bet two bits upon the stallion's chances." She muttered, "I made a foalish spectacle of myself."

Twilight had heard about the accident from Rainbow Dash, but Luna's account was far more graphic. Too graphic! She swallowed the sourness at the back of her throat and asked, "H-he's alright though, right?"

"Aye, no thanks to me. Tis a lucky pass that I did not simply use magic to 'heal' him or he would now be a legless cripple."

They were both quiet for a long time and Twilight could hear Spike bustling away in the kitchen fixing dinner. A small reminder of normal life after listening to the brief but nightmarish story.

The Princess seemed to be waiting for her to say something.

"Umm…"

Noctilucent sighed, waved a hoof and said, "I am most sorry Twilight Sparkle. T'was not my intention to cause upset. This day has been fraught with unintentional breaking of rules and upsetting of ponies."

"Oh?"

Noctilucent sucked in her lower lip and looked away. She squirmed on her seat like a filly afraid of being scolded and Twilight struggled to keep a sudden smile off her muzzle.

"I may have… Nay, I did cause offence and suffering to a patient by… By flirting with him."

"F-flirting? With a patient?" Twilight's voice squeaked and cracked.

"I'm ashamed to admit tis true. I know there are regulations against such misbehaviour but I had no intent to seduce the poor stallion. Merely to test him." She sighed and leaned her head against her hooves and muttered, "Still, t'was foolhardy to rouse the curse he is afflicted with and I have broken the golden rule of medicine; to do no harm."

"There's a curse?" Twilight asked. Should she write to Princess Celestia for advice or contact her friends right away to help her deal with whatever this curse was?

"Aye, a curse. Do not trouble yourself with it." Noctilucent waved a hoof, like shooing a fly away. "Tis a thing neither spell nor potion can touch, though your fertile womb may provide succour when the time comes."

"What?!"

Noctilucent didn't seem to hear her dismayed squeak. The disguised princess banged her hooves on the table and huffed, "Tis a shame I may not befriend a patient, as he wished it so despite the pain mine misdeed hath caused him."

"Friends stick with you even when you make mistakes!" Twilight blurted.

She slapped a hoof over her mouth.

Noctilucent blinked at her a few times and said, "A-aye… I suppose they would?"

"Yes, friends!" Twilight decided to push the advantage while she had it. "You really do need to make some friends, Pri… Noctilucent. It's great you want to help other ponies by working at the hospital. But it shouldn't all be about work, right? You can help a pony just by spending time with her, doing things you enjoy together, helping with her problems and letting her help you too." She'd have to find somepony with strong stomach! "I-I think it'd be the best way for you to get back in touch with Equestria."

"Thou are likely in the right." Noctilucent grimaced and said, "I shall do as you bid and put more effort into seeking a friend, though I do not know when I shall find the time."

Twilight relaxed and almost sighed with relief. This was a happy topic she'd become much more familiar with even if it was still kind of new. At least it didn't involve discussing broken anything — bones or rules. Or her womb. She didn't want to know what that was about!

"I know! How about we make a list of all the things you could do to look for a friend?"

Noctilucent grumbled but was soon making suggestions as Twilight wrote down their ideas. Many of them weren't the sort of things that Twilight would do, like 'Carousing an Alehouse' or 'Jousting Tourney'. Did ponies even do that anymore? She wasn't sure, so it went on the list. She could ask Apple Jack and Rainbow Dash about places to drink in Ponyville, they should know of some. Pinkie Pie definitely would, but Pinkie was supposed to stay away from places like that.

Twilight nibbled on her quill's vane and muttered, "It's too bad you can't be friends with a patient."

"Indeed." Noctilucent yawned and sat up straighter. "Though he is an odd fellow he hath an attractive rump."

And right back into uncomfortable territory again! Twilight whined, "Princess!"

"What? Tis most shapely, almost like unto a mares. Round from all angles and well-muscled for thrusting." Noctilucent waved her hooves in the air, miming a pair of buttocks.

Twilight groaned and hit her head against the table.

Author's Note

If you don't like this Clickspring pone, you should probably stop reading the story right here.

Please let me know if you see any typos, grammar problems, etc.