1000 Ways To Die

Date: February 14, 2010
Location: Manehatten, Behind Electric's shop

Bass and Piercer were your average couple in love. They went to the movies, took long walks, and they had hot kinky sex. Only problem they got it on in public. These hedonistic horndogs were hardcore exhibitionists that like to get it on in public bathrooms, behind a dumpster, alleyways, and even behind a shop called Electric. A unicorn named Electric owned it. He didn’t really care though. If nopony saw them then it didn’t affect his business. Piercer loved it so much. Every time they were done Piercer would have her pierced tongue lolling out and Bass would be spent.

Bass, however, one day bought something from a sex shop owned by a changeling to add a little more punch to their sex life. He bought something called The Prince Albert also known as the Prince’s Wand. Hey, Sweet Life, you’re a sexy changeling and you told us a lot about sex toys before. What’s this thing do?

"The Prince's Wand or Prince Albert is a piece of body piercing jewelry. It consists of a hollow tube with a threaded cap at the end. Prince's wands require precision measurements of the penis and urethra both flaccid and erect, in addition to the original Prince Albert piercing. It’s very good for a good pony ride.”

Bass’s mare Piercer loved it. She loved it so much and they decided to get it on behind Electric’s shop again. However, they always had sex on top of a power transformer. You know those green boxes that always say warning and danger. Yeah. That looks safe to me…Idiots.

“You ready to meet Prince Albert?” Bass asked.

Piercer nodded her head. She couldn’t wait to get it on. Piercer was standing on the power transformer with her legs spread open to show her wet hole. Bass had his hooves on the ground. As soon as he swung out the new sex toy he got. He had his target…But

*Zap!!!!*

“AHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!” Bass shouted as his stallion hood got electrocuted. Then he feel down on the ground…dead

“Oh, my Celestia Ahhh!!!” Piercer shouted.

So Electric you own the store what happened. “When the power transformer meet that sex toy which was metal it was a good conductor. Electricity is essentially trying to find its path back to ground. So, if you touch that power transformer with that sex toy and you don’t have a good ground contact. Your hooves would become the ground. You're fucked. Plain and simple.”

Piercer didn’t get laid, but she did get lucky. Her hooves were spread open and not on the ground to complete the circuit. So, Nurse Redheart explain the death more.

“In this case when contact with the transformer was made the current flowed through his bloodstream starting from his pelvis. Then going up to the aorta into his heart. The current then stopped his heart.”

Well, what have we learned here? When you're ready to take the next step in a relationship. Do it in private. Mares in heat. Trust me on this. Just wait. Or else the stallion that will please you will wind up…Dead.

Way To Die #60 Hertz So Good