Chapters Making Friends can be Hard
Author's Note
Well. Let's see if this goes well.
First of all, words between this symbol {} are in English, which ponies won't be able to understand. For example, {}FUCK!{} wouldn't be directly understood by ponies.
Second of all, while there will be funny moments (I hope) this isn't directly intended to be a comedy. It's intended to be a bit of 'Stranger in a Strange Land' mixed with 'The Outsiders'. I'm going to try to stick as closely to canon as possible, and what I mean by that is I'll only change stuff if it suits my literary needs.
Also, while there may, possibly, eventually be sex, the sex tag is mostly for discussions of sex and sexuality, and while there may be some combat and/or violence, the gore tag is mostly due to our Human friend skinning and butchering his kills, which may happen on-screen, so to speak, at some point or another.
Lastly, while the Mane 6 are tagged, the human in this story doesn't like them very much (due to reasons that will be explained in story) and they, in turn, don't like him much in return. While one of the eventual goals is intended to be a reconciliation between them, it won't happen quickly, and won't happen smoothly.
One More Thing! This story diverges from No Second Prances , Season 6, episode 6, at just after 6 minutes into the episode. So, there will be some spoilers up to that point, and possibly beyond. Also, you see what I did there? *wink wink, nudge nudge*
Enjoy!
Making Friends can be Hard
Starlight Glimmer kicked the dirt under her hooves. Irritation clawed its way through the back of her mind despite her best attempts to suppress it. Even though the sun was high in the sky, the flowers were blooming, and all around her the ponies of Ponyville were enjoying early summer, their joy did nothing but enhance her negativity. ‘Perhaps cutting through the park wasn’t such a good idea,’ she thought to herself.
“Ugh, what is going on!” she mumbled to herself. “This is Ponyville! If I can’t make a friend here, there’s something wrong with me!”
She sighed. “Ok, calm down,” she told herself, even though she sounded a touch crazy, even to her own ears. “Nopony makes friends with a total stress-case!”
It wasn’t very reassuring. She looked around once more. It seemed like everypony around her was with someone, except for her.
“Stop stressing,” she told herself.
Everypony else had a friend or family nearby spending time with them, doing fun things together, enjoying such a beautiful day. And here she was, all alone, on a task by her mentor to make a new friend to introduce to Princess Celestia at a supposedly informal dinner. It was nothing to worry about!
“Stop stressing!” she told herself a little more firmly.
It wasn’t like she had a horrible past, mind controlling entire villages and taking away their cutie marks only to be defeated by the Princess’ former student, a Princess in her own right, before crafting an elaborate revenge plan that involved going back in time and ruining her new mentor’s chance of ever making friends with the other Bearers of the Elements of Harmony and by preventing that event she caused Equestria to be destroyed, like, a dozen times over, before finally being defeated and made a student and given a second chance, oh no, nothing like that, it wasn’t like her past would make it IMPOSSIBLE TO EVER MAKE FRIENDS WITH ANYPONY EVER!
“STOP STRESSING!” she shouted to herself.
Ponies all around her stopped what they were doing and turned to stare at her. Starlight felt the weight of so many stares, judging her and finding her wanting -or, more likely, crazy- and in her embarrassment, she took off running.
Despite the wind whipping through her ears, she could hear the murmurs of the crowd. She could see the sideways glances and the way ponies turned their noses up at her in disgust. Every minute in this town was another reminder that she wasn’t welcome here. She closed her eyes and dug her hooves deeper into the dirt, hoping for a little more leverage to push her faster.
‘Maybe if I go fast enough, I’ll be able to leave it all behind me…’ she thought to herself.
Despite her guilt over how she had treated the villagers in her old village, a part of her missed how much a part of the community she had felt back then. Even though they were more followers than friends, at least they accepted her.
‘Not like this stupid town and these stupid ponies!’ she said with rising anger, even as she closed her eyes and bowed her head to lean into her sprint. ‘This would all be so much easier if I could just-’
WHAM!
Starlight gasped in pain, even as she rolled into a tangle of limbs with whoever she had -literally- run into. Her body complained of various bruises and scrapes even as she did her best to gingerly extricate herself. First she had to spit out the long, auburn mane that somehow got into her mouth. Next, she pushed herself off of the tawny coated being and rolled to her feet. Finally free of the tangle of limbs, she took the opportunity to look herself over.
Despite the high-speed collision, Starlight didn’t seem to have broken anything. Her muzzle and chest were going to be aching in the morning, and the scrapes along her withers and flanks were going to need to be disinfected. Fortunately, aside from that, the only thing wrong with her was the layer of dust all over her coat and mane.
Once she had finished dusting herself off as best as she could, Starlight finally got a good look at who she had run into.
‘Thats… not a pony,’ was the first thing that came to mind. The tawny coat and auburn mane weren’t a lionesque pony. ‘A manticore?!’ she thought with a jolt of shock.
As the creature stood up, first onto all fours, and then reared up onto just the hind legs, a second shot of adrenaline coursed through her, and she subconsciously slinked back away from it.
‘T-that’s not a manticore!’
The tall bipedal being -possibly even taller than Princess Celestia- was wearing the manticore’s skin like some kind of grotesque cloak. The auburn leonine mane was still attached to the deceased manticore’s head, still attached to (most of) the rest of the skin and had been pulled up over the bizarre being’s head. The paws and forelegs were wrapped around the creature's neck like a sick parody of a high-class pony wearing a sweater on their back. The sleeveless shirt and pants seemed to be woven out of some kind of coarse plant fiber. The creature’s hind-hooves were wrapped in what looked to be some kind of rabbit fur moccasin, a sight that would surely make poor Fluttershy burst into tears. A supple leather (leather!) belt was wrapped around it’s waist, keeping the rough, poorly made trousers up, and all kinds of pouches and boxes were hanging from it. On it’s left thigh, a full sized woodcutter’s axe hung from some kind of holster, and the creature looked like it could use it like a one-hoofed hatchet. The curved ends of some kind of bow peaked up over one of the being’s shoulders, the other end curved around the opposite hip from the axe, though Starlight couldn’t figure out why there was some kind of pulley attached to the bow-tips. A quiver hanging from the belt completed the picture of some kind of primitive barbarian.
“Watch where you’re going!” the incised creature shouted at her. Starlight started and took a step back in fright. The creature started patting itself down, both to remove much of the road dust that it had been covered with and to check the various bags and pouches.
“U-um, sorry!” Starlight said, surprised that the thing could even speak Equestrian. The creature sniffed a bit and turned away from her, muttering to itself in a different language, one that Starlight in all her studies had never heard. It was much harsher than Equestrian. Rather than smooth flowing syllables and soft, sometimes trilling consonants, the being’s language seemed to use harsh fricatives, like it was spitting the words out, snapping the sounds against the lips and teeth in distincts pops and smacks.
“Are… are you ok?” she asked with a touch of guilt. “I didn’t mean to run into you, I wasn’t watching where I was going.”
“I’m fine,” the being snapped at her. Starlight took another step back. ‘It sounds so… angry,’ she thought to herself.
“Um… ok, good!” she said with false cheer and a fake smile. ‘Ugh, anypony could see through that,’ she berated herself.
The being ignored her even as it untied one small pouch from it’s belt and opened the drawstring. ‘Is everything this thing is wearing made of leather?’ Starlight was a bit disgusted.
“{}FUCK!{}” the creature shouted and threw the leather pouch down into the dirt. Startled, Starlight took another step back, now well out of reach of the big, angry, animal-skin wearing barbarian. The word was harsh and short and so full of anger, Starlight could practically taste it. It turned to her and pointed.
“Where is my gold, you little thief!” it shouted.
“Gold? What gold?” Starlight asked, surprised.
“The gold I brought to barter with.” It pointed down at the little pouch it had thrown down on the ground. Between grit teeth, it ground out “Return my property to me!”
“I- I didn’t take your gold,” Starlight protested, feeling a little angry herself in the face of such accusations.
“I had it only minute before you knock me over,” it said, it’s accent becoming thicker, the vowels coming out short and quick and the consonants sharp and guttural.
“I didn’t take your gold, I have my own bits,” Starlight said, clenching her own teeth in anger.
“Then you explain how gold go missing after you attack me,” it ground out.
“I Don’t KNOW!” Starlight shouted back. Her horn sparked a bit from her irritation. “I said I was sorry for running into you, I didn’t attack you, and I DIDN’T TAKE YOUR BUCKING GOLD!”
The thing’s forehooves (or were they claws like Spike’s?) clenched. It closed it’s eyes, took a deep breath and let it blow out through it’s nose.
“Fine. Then you will help me find it, or you will give me bits to replace it,” it said, still irritated, but at least not sounding murderous anymore.
“Fine,” Starlight ground out through clenched teeth. “Where did you last see it.”
“I checked it right as I entered town, right over there,” it pointed to the edge of the village, not more than two hundred paces from where they were standing. “Couldn’t have been more than a minute before you ran into me.”
The stretch was, like most of Ponyville, a dirt road, uneven from wagon wheels and dried puddles, deep ruts carved into the surface. The road tended to turn into a muddy mire each time it rained. There were plenty of cracks and crevices that some gold could have fallen into.
“Could I see your pouch,” Starlight asked, pointing a hoof at the pouch in question, still laying on the road.
The being nodded, picked it up, and lobbed it to her. Starlight caught it in her magic, and, as repulsed as she was by the material (leather! Ugh!) she inspected it carefully. The stitching (UGH! Leather strips!) was crude, a simple looping stitch, but it appeared to be strong and sturdy. The drawstring (also leather. Blech!) was a little worn but otherwise intact.
‘At least the fur of whatever animal this had been was all shaved off,’ she thought to herself.
Starlight looked at the creature, and though it looked doubtfully at her and raised one eyebrow, she noted that it’s facial expressions were similar enough to a pony’s that she could read them. She grinned nervously.
Turning her attention back to the pouch, she turned it inside out. A tiny amount of gold dust was coating the worn inside of the pouch. ‘Well, it definitely uses it to carry cold. Probably not bits, though,’ she observed. Bits were, after all, made out of iron with a very thin gold foil covering.
A frayed bit of leather caught her attention, and she stretch the bag a bit to get a closer look. There, near where the bottom of the pouch would be if it wasn’t currently inside out, a frayed bit of stitching revealed a tiny hole, perhaps an eighth of a hoof across.
“Ah-hah!” Starlight shouted and pointed out the flaw. “Your stitching was fraying. The hole isn’t obvious from the outside, but if your gold was small enough, it could have slipped through here.”
The being took two steps to close the distance and bent down to look at the bag.
“{}Well, I’ll be damned,{}” it muttered to itself in it’s own language. “The fault was with my pouch, it seems. I… apologize for accusing you of theft,” it said contritely.
“If I were in your horseshoes, I can’t say I’d do any different,” Starlight told him, feeling a little ashamed herself. The being ran a claw through it’s hair, pulling the manticore hood off of it’s head as it did, revealing a sandy brown mane on the top of its head. It sighed and ran a palm down it’s face and scratched the rather bushy unkempt beard growing along its jaw and mouth. Small beady eyes opened and focused on her. The creature’s iris was the brightest icy blue, like sunlight shining through a glacial cave.
“Well, would you help me look for my gold?” it asked her, it’s voice softer than earlier.
Starlight considered it. On one hand, it had accused her of theft, but it had apologized. It had shouted at her, but she had run into it and knocked it down. ‘Not so good as far as first impressions go,’ she thought, ‘but… second chances are important. Besides, maybe I could make a friend and get the Princess’ friendship lesson out of the way. Feed two birds with one scone and all that,’
“Ok, I’ll help you,” she said with a tentative grin. “But maybe after… we could get some lunch?”
“I don’t think that’ll be possible,” it said, grimacing.
“W-what? Why not?” she asked.
“The ponies here… well, they have made it very clear that I am not welcome, except to barter in the market,” it said with no small amount of bitterness. “No restaurants will serve me, even if I offer to pay double up front.”
“That… doesn’t sound like Ponyville,” Starlight said, but even she could hear the doubt in her voice. “This is supposed to be the friendliest village in Equestria. Hay, Pinkie Pie even throws a ‘Welcome to Ponyville’ party for every new pony in Ponyville.”
“Oh, yes, you are correct,” it sneered. “Every pony is welcome to Ponyville. I am not a pony. Or a griffon. Or a minotaur. Or any of the other species that ponies are allies with.”
“Oh.” Starlight frowned a bit. The creature frowned back. “If it makes you feel any better, Ponyville isn’t very welcoming to me either.”
The being snorted a bit and raised an imaginary glass in it’s claw. “Here’s to the friendliest village in Equestria, the friendliest nation in the world. Home of the Princess of Friendship and everything.”
Starlight couldn’t help but to snort a bit at the obvious sarcasm. It gave her an idea, so she grinned at it a bit.
“What’s that? You’re a creepy zebra living out in the forest? No problem! We can be friends!” Starlight said in a poor imitation of Twilight’s voice. “Hmm? A Spirit of Chaos and Disharmony that can literally tear the fabric of reality? Sure thing! We can reform you! Evil Overlady that wants to take over Equestria and plunge it into eternal night? Let me just blast you with my Friendship Cannon! Then you can visit any time you want!”
Starlight grinned along with the strange being.
“Uh oh!” it said, chuckling a bit. “A human wearing animal skins , living out in the forest wants to borrow a book or two from the library? Nope! Back to where you belong, you savage beast!” The human (apparently) waved a claw dramatically at an imaginary foe, before turning it palm up as if begging for a treat. “Unless you want to barter with the gold you find in the spooky, scary forest we’re all too terrified to enter!” It’s voice rose in falsetto, ending with a quivering squeak, even as it grinned and suppressed laughter.
The two looked at each other and burst out laughing. It was a little bit cathartic, Starlight felt, to mock the ponies of Ponyville. They did have some unfair double standards.
“Heh, I suppose I should introduce myself,” Starlight said, once her laughter was a little more under control. “Starlight Glimmer, former Evil Overmare, Advocate of Equality, and record holder of ‘Destroyed Equestria the most number of times’, currently reformed and now the Princess of Friendship’s newest pupil.”
“Henry DeWitt, Lord of the Everfree Forest, hunter of manticores, archer extraordinaire, Master of Mechanical Engineering, and unwelcome guest of the Friendliest Place in Equestria.”
The two laughed together at their overly pretentious introductions. Starlight could feel the tension drain away, again marvelling at how cathartic mockery could be. ‘Maybe it’s not the friendliest thing to do, but I do feel better now,’ she thought to herself.
“Now, what do you say we look for this lost gold of yours?” Starlight asked.
“Sure,” Henry replied, much more relaxed than it had been before. “It should be somewhere along this stretch of road.”
The two took off, looking in the cracks in the dried mud and the ruts left behind by heavy wagons. Not more than halfway to the point that Henry indicated he had entered the village in, Starlight caught a reflection out of the corner of her eyes. There, laying at the bottom of one of the ruts in the road, a trail of a dozen small nuggets of gold lay scattered.
“Aha!” she shouted as she gathered them in her magic and held them aloft. “Henry, I found your gold!”
“Thank you, Ms. Glimmer,” Henry said as it walked over and held out a claw. Starlight floated the small pile of gold over and let it drop into the human’s grasp.
“You’re welcome,” she replied.
Henry fiddled a bit with the assorted pouches on his belt, found an empty one, and deposited the small pile of gold into it.
“Henry,” Starlight said, catching it’s attention. “How did you come across your gold?”
“Hmm? Well, I pan for it out in the forest. There’s a river there that deposits small nuggets like this in the sandy bed,” he replied. “In fact, I can’t seem to wash my dishes without finding at least one nugget.”
“It’s that plentiful?” Starlight asked, surprised. Henry started back towards the center of the village, so Starlight trotted up next to him.
“Yes. I’ve been meaning to follow the river upstream, maybe try to find the vein it’s coming from, but I haven't gotten around to it.”
Starlight frowned a bit. “If you’re finding gold nuggets all the time, why did you bring so little into town to barter with?” she asked.
“I shouldn’t need more than I brought,” Henry replied. “I usually only come to town once a moon or so to stock up on things I can’t find or make myself in the forest. The ponies here prefer it that way.”
Starlight frowned a bit at the reminder of how unwelcoming the ponies here could be.
“But, some weavils managed to get into my flour stores. Besides, I’m almost out of baking powder, and I could use some more railway spikes.”
“Railway spikes?” Starlight asked. “What do you need railway spikes for?”
“I use them as very large nails,” Henry replied. “I’m expanding my cabin, and it's a lot less work to use railway spikes as nails than it is to carefully carve dovetail joints to keep the walls from falling apart.”
“Dove tail joints?”
“Ah, um… hmm…” Henry scratched at his chin a bit. “Basically, carve a hole in the shape of a parallelogram in one board, and a matching parallelogram spur in another, and when you fit them together, the shape will hold the two together. Though, it works better with some glue or pitch to act as an adhesive.”
“Thats… pretty intelligent, actually.”
“Eh, I suppose. It’s an old woodworking trick from back home,” Henry said with a bit of nostalgia creeping into its voice. “The entire main room of my cabin was made without nails at all. Even the wood shingled roof.”
“You must be a pretty good carpenter to manage that,” Starlight complemented it.
“Eh… not really. I’ve had to go back over most of my earlier work,” Henry groused. “It was pretty shoddy construction at first, but at least it kept me alive through my first winter. Even if I forgot I needed a chimney.”
“You… forgot to build a chimney?” Starlight snickered a bit.
“Yes. I had to climb up on the roof in a hoof and a half of snow and cut a hole with my axe to allow the smoke to escape.”
Starlight’s snickers turned to a full on laugh. As they closed in on the market square, the streets were a little busier than they were near the edge of the village, and the nearby ponies (not too near, thanks to the manticore-skin wearing ape-like barbarian) gave Starlight sideways glances, clearly questioning her sanity.
“It wasn’t that funny,” Henry groused a bit.
“S-sure it wasn’t,” Starlight chuckled. “Says the Master of Engineering.”
“Mechanical Engineering,” Henry grumbled. “Not Architecture.”
“D-definitely not!”
“Hey, I could tear one of your steam trains apart, improve it in at least a dozen ways, put it back together, and it would still be a century and a half behind my home’s level of technological sophistication!”
Starlight’s laughter died quite suddenly. “Really?” She asked with a raised eyebrow, clearly not believing the claim.
“Sure. I could redesign the steam piston alone, which would increase the engine’s power by at least twenty percent.”
“Riiiight, says the forest-dwelling barbarian.”
“I have a Master’s degree in Mechanical Engineering. I was designing cutting edge electric engines at M.I.T. before I got pulled here,” he said, a little hotly. “Y’all don’t even have internal combustion engines. Hay, your computers still use vacuum tubes ! Those were obsolete nearly a century ago from my perspective.”
“Wait wait wait,” Starlight paused in the middle of the road and waved a hoof in front of her face. “You’re telling me that you know how to make internal combustion engines?”
“I built an eight cylinder internal combustion engine the size of your head for a science fair before I even hit puberty,” he haughtily said. “You ponies’ steam trains are positively primitive compared to what I’m used to.”
“Oh really?” Starlight asked. “Well then… prove it.”
“Fine. Give me parchment and quill!” Henry’s accent thickened with his temper, practically spitting the words at her.
Starlight smirked a bit. “Wait here,” she said as she trotted away.
A quick stop at Quills and Sofas and Starlight came back holding a large roll of parchment, a quill, and a bottle of ink.
“Here,” she said and pushed them into Henry’s arms. Turning away, she grabbed a few medium sized rocks from a nearby garden, prompting some complaints from the pony who owned said garden, lit her horn, and transformed them into a slightly too small chair and desk for Henry.
“Fine,” he groused as he squeezed himself into the tiny chair. After unrolling the scroll, opening the inkwell, and dipping the quill, he paused.
“Can you find me a straightedge?”
Starlight transfigured a stick and held it out to him.
“Thanks,” he muttered absently.
Taking the straight edge, Henry quickly sketched a simple two-stroke, single cylinder engine, like the kind that often powered hand-pushed lawn mowers. As he added details, he began pointing them out to Starlight.
“This is the carburetor. It mixes the fuel with an appropriate amount of air to achieve optimal fuel-air ratios. The flow can be adjusted with this knob here. An absorbent material, like a sponge or a foam works best. By flowing a liquid fuel, like {}gasoline{} or distilled grain alcohol into the absorbent material, as air passes through the material, it will evaporate the liquid fuel, and the combined fuel-air mixture will be pulled into the engine through this valve. You follow me so far?”
Starlight nodded, a bit dumbstruck.
“From here, the rotation of the crankshaft opens the valve, allowing the fuel-air mixture into the combustion chamber when the piston lowers. As the piston rises to its apex, a spark here ignites the fuel-air mixture, causing a small, controlled explosion. The expanding gases push down the piston, which turns the crankshaft. When the piston reaches its lowest point, the pressure of the expanding gas escapes into here, the muffler. Then, the fuel-air mixture flows into the combustion chamber, and the cycle begins again.”
Henry finished a few more details in the simplistic, but mechanically precise drawing of the simple, single-cylinder two-stroke engine.
“By increasing the flow of the fuel, you will increase the revolutions per minute of the engine, which results in more power output. You can use the rotation of the crankshaft here to perform all kinds of mechanical actions, from rotating a wheel, like on a locomotive, to powering a mechanical loom or other industrial machine.”
Henry wiped the last of the ink from the quill back into the inkwell, closed the inkwell, lifted the newly drawn blueprints, and carefully blew on the ink to dry it.
“This particular design is only about 50 years old from my perspective,” he said. “Practically primitive, but it should be both functional and reliable. Though, you’ll want to mix in a lubricant with the fuel, preferably refined mineral oil, but I suppose a high-temperature tallow or vegetable oil would suffice.”
Judging that the ink was sufficiently dry, Henry turned to look at Starlight. His new pony friend’s mouth hung wide open, her eyes were nearly leaping out of her skull, and a shaking hoof was pointing at the blueprints.
“You know,” Henry grinned as he leaned close, “If you hold that expression long enough, it’ll freeze like that.”
“You… you…” Starlight stammered.
“I… made a very crude drawing of a two-stroke internal combustion engine. I was, after all, a mechanical engineer.”
“I don’t believe it…”
“Believe it .”
Starlight took the schematics gently from Henry with her magic and held them up in front of herself.
“This is amazing! Do you know how long an internal combustion engine has been a goal of Equestria’s engineers?” she asked him.
“No clue,” he replied.
“Two decades. Twenty bucking years!” she shouted.
“Oh, is that it?” Henry replied, only half paying attention to her exclamations, instead using one of his claws to clean out an ear.
“Is that it? Is that… grrr!” Starlight grit her teeth. Henry rolled his eyes.
“Calm down, Ms. Glimmer. I’m sure y’all would have gotten it soon enough.”
Starlight took a deep breath and let it out.
“Ok, I’m alright, it’s no big deal,” she said. “I mean, it’s not like you’ve been living out in the forest this whole time with knowledge that could advance science by years or anything…”
“Hmm? Oh, yeah, only, like… four years now? Something like that.”
“Yes, only four years…” she paused. “Four years?!”
“Well, four and three quarters,” Henry replied. “I first arrived in the early fall. Not long before… uh… I think it’s called Nightmare Night?”
“Wait, so, you’ve been here almost five years?”
“Yeah, I suppose so.” He sighed. “I had a lot of time to make my cabin comfortable. Considering I was never welcome here,” he gestured to the various buildings around him.
That drew Starlight up short. If it’d never had a friend in Ponyville before, it’d never have had anyone to share its knowledge with. ‘So much for friendship,’ she groused to herself once more. ‘If somepony, anypony had taken the time to talk to it, maybe it would have shared some of its knowledge with us sooner. Hay, someone may have even gotten it to meet with Princess Celestia, who could have introduced it to all the scientists and engineers at her school, and who knows what we could have learned since then…’
Starlight paused. ‘Princess Celestia…?’ She facehooved.
“Henry,” she began, “I’ve got a proposition for you. A win-win kind of situation.”
“Oh?” it replied with a raised eyebrow.
“I have a task from Princess Twilight, you see. I have to bring a friend to an informal dinner tomorrow night, and introduce that friend to both Princess Twilight, and Princess Celestia. If you come to that dinner with me, I can introduce you to some ponies that could help you share your knowledge of mechanical engineering.”
“Princess Twilight?” Henry asked, his eyebrow still raised.
“Yes, and Princess Celestia.”
“Hmm.” it scratched its bearded chin. “No thanks.”
“W-what?” Starlight asked.
“I said no thanks.” Henry looked at her hurt expression and hurried to add, “I mean, I’d love to be your friend, Ms. Glimmer, you’ve been rather friendly towards me, I just would rather not meet Princess Twilight again.”
“... again?”
“Ah, well…” Henry grimaced a bit. “Lets just say that my first meeting with her didn’t go so well. This was before she became a princess, mind you, but she more or less started the whole ‘humans aren’t welcome here’ thing this whole town’s got going on.”
“Wait, are we talking about the same Twilight Sparkle?” Starlight asked, dubiously. “Purple coat, dark blue mane with a pink stripe? Element of Harmony? That Twilight Sparkle?”
“Yes, that Twilight Sparkle.”
“... ok, I can’t believe it.”
“It’s true,” Henry said, fiddling a bit with the too-small chair.
“... somehow, I just can’t see Twilight doing something like that.” Starlight said. “The rest of the ponies here? They can be a bunch of foals at times, but Twilight never struck me as being quite so… discriminatory.”
“Let's see…” Henry said, tugging on his beard a bit as he concentrated. “I think her exact words were… ‘Get out of here, Chaos-spawn! I won’t let you lay a single claw on my books!’ or something like that.”
“But… why would she call you Chaos-spawn?”
“Oh, didn’t I mention that? Apparently, Discord wanted something special as a piece-de-resistance for his little chaos storm when he escaped almost five years ago.” Henry said rather dispassionately. “So he tore through the fabric of reality, reached into a completely different universe, plucked me up by the back of my shirt, and literally threw me into the middle of Ponyville.”
“Discord brought you here?”
“Yeah. Hey, don’t look at me like that,” Henry said, since Starlight was giving him the most disbelieving expression he’d yet seen on her face. “You can ask him yourself. Well, if he hasn’t forgotten. I mean, it was almost five years ago.”
“I’ll be sure to ask him next time I see him.”
“Sure, but you’ll see I’m right. Anyway, so there I was, landing on a super-sized ice cream sundae, which was really terrible because I’m {}lactose intolerant{}-”
“You're what, now?”
“Uh… well, basically, I can’t properly digest milk or some milk products anymore,” it said. “It either makes me nauseous, gassy, or sick.”
“Oh, right, that. That’s not very common amongst ponies.”
“Not too common for humans either.” Henry waved that line of questioning away and continued. “Anyway, so I dropped into the middle of Ponyville, right in the middle of Discord’s rampage, so pretty much all of the villagers knew I was brought here by Discord. When the Bearers defeated him, I get the feeling that I was supposed to be fixed, but their little rainbow cannon just kinda… I dunno, passed right through me. Didn’t even tickle.”
“That’s strange. All of Discord’s other Chaos-spawn were fixed by the Elements.”
“Well, I’ve got a theory about that,” Henry said as he started back towards the market once more. Starlight took a moment to revert the desk and chair to the original stones she had transfigured them from and return them to the garden she’d borrowed them from. She trotted back to it’s side.
“Well, let’s hear it,” she prompted it.
“Ok, so, this might get a little complex, because it goes into very advanced physics, but…” Henry trailed off, looking into the sky, trying to organize its thoughts. “Ok, so according to {}Einstein’s{} Theory of {}Relativity{}, space itself can bend and curve naturally, usually due to the presence of a large quantity of mass, and gravity is a side-effect of this curvature. However, it’s possible for space to fold back in on itself so intently, that two distant points can, in essence, touch each other. Like this,” Henry took his schematics and gently folded the two corners together. “This shortened space between two distant points is called a worm hole. Uh, that’s the best translation from {}English{} into Equestrian I can come up with,” he added when he saw how confused Starlight looked at the word.
“So, worm holes are like teleportation?” she asked.
“Yes, only without magic, just a consequence of physical phenomena. So, when Discord tore a hole in reality, he in essence made a worm hole to where I was, and since he physically reached through to pull me through the worm hole, I wasn’t actually directly affected by his chaos magic. As such, when the Elements fixed everything Discord did with his chaos magic, it would have fixed the worm hole, but not return me through it.”
“That would make sense,” Starlight nodded. “One Cup’s Law of Arcane Attraction states that like calls to like, so if the Elements followed the trails of Chaos magic to fix its effects, since you weren’t summoned directly by chaos magic, but rather physically pulled through a physical phenomena, even if the phenomena was created by magic, the Elements wouldn’t have seen you as something to ‘fix’, so to speak.”
“Exactly my thoughts as well.”
The two shared a smile, one academic recognizing another’s intelligence.
“You’re pretty smart, for a forest-dwelling barbarian,” Starlight told him.
“Thanks… I think.”
Henry came to a stop at the edge of the market square and looked around. While it was pretty crowded, its tall stature gave it the ability to see over the crowds. Shading its eyes from the sun still high overhead, it peered at the various signs to see which direction to head towards first.
“Here, I’ll need to pop in to Barnyard Bargains first to pick up the flour and baking powder,” it said to Starlight. “Um… I don’t suppose I could convince you to pick up the railway spikes for me? I’ve already paid for it, but it should be at Iron Hammer’s Smithy.”
“Sure, no problem. What’re friends for?” she asked him rhetorically as she nudged the side of it’s knee with her leg. Henry grinned down at her.
“Meet me at Bon Bon’s Bon Bons afterwards?” it asked.
“Uh, sure! Though, are you welcome there?” Starlight asked.
“Yeah, one of the few places I’m marginally welcome at. Barnyard Bargains and Iron Hammer’s are the others, conveniently. Barnyard Bargains because I told Filthy Rich about fixed prices, and Iron Hammer’s because I told him about some steel smithing techniques my people know.”
“What about Bon Bon’s?”
“Oh, uh… well, that one’s a little embarrassing, but…” Henry trailed off.
“... but what?” Starlight prompted it.
“Well, turns out that Bon Bon’s best friend and roomate Lyra Heartstrings is a bit of a cryptozoologist. Just as a hobby, mind you,” it said. “Apparently, there’s some very ancient legends about my kind in old pre-unification unicorn lore.”
“Wait, really?”
“Uh… yeah… Lyra found the references in a really really old book…” Henry reached up and rubbed the back of its neck. “Uh… lets see… it was called Ars Daemonica or something like that.”
“That… sounds like a Demonology tome,” Starlight said, brows furrowed. “Wait, so you’re some kind of demon?”
“Well, I don’t feel like a demon,” Henry retorted.
“I didn’t mean it like that,” she said with a wave of her hoof. “But if humans are in a Demonology text-”
“A text about summoning demons, specifically,” Henry interjected.
“... then what kind of demon does the book say you are?” she continued.
“... do I really have to say it?” it whined.
“Yes.”
“Ponyfeathers,” Henry spat. “According to Ars Daemonica , humans are a type of… succubus or incubus, depending on the gender of the human in question.” It crossed it’s arms in front of its chest and looked away, face flushing slightly.
“Pffft-” Starlight struggled to hold in her laughter. “You’re a sex demon !”
Starlight laughed so hard she ended up flopping onto her side. Henry mildly glared at her. “It isn’t funny,” he grumbled.
“So… so, what, was Lyra trying to sign a pact with you or something!” she half-shouted, half-laughed.
“Not funny!”
“She was !” As her laughter intensified, she ended up rolling on her back.
“... she was.” Henry closed his eyes and turned its nose up at her, face flushed, determined to wait out her laughter.
“S-s-so, are you an i-incubus, or a s-s-succubus!” she asked it between guffaws.
“What, can’t tell on your own?” It sneered down at her.
“N-n-no, n-not really,” she giggled and rolled onto her belly.
“Ugh,” Henry complained before pinching it’s nose. “{}I guess that’s what I get for using scent-suppressing soap,{}” it muttered to itself in its own language.
“Well,” it said, leaning down towards her, lips spreading into a bit of a leer, “If you’re so interested, you should know that I would be an Incubus.”
“W-what, interested, me?” she said, now flushing a bit herself. “Don’t be ridiculous .”
“Aww, Starlight,” He wheedled, “Don’t you want to make a pact ? I’m sure I can make it worth your while…” he trailed off, gazing deeply into her eyes.
“Uh… yeah, let’s not,” she said, even as she blushed a little deeper and looked away.
“Oh, you’re breaking my heart,” he said with an absolute deadpan expression.
“Oh, poor foal,” she deadpanned back, still fighting her fading blush, causing Henry to snicker at her a bit.
Still, the (apparent) sex demon stood back up and said, “Let's get my shopping done, then we can meet up at Bon Bon’s and grab some soda or something.”
“Sounds like a plan to me.”
As Henry started walking towards Barnyard Bargains, the crowd parting around him, Starlight couldn’t help but think to herself, ‘I think I could get used to this friendship thing.’
Author's Note
Caution; politics ahead!
Since the show was designed for kids, certain adult concepts are completely avoided to keep the ratings low enough for their target audience. As such, references to alcohol (and freshly pressed apple cider doesn't count!) or drug use, sex, or the legal system are completely absent. As such, I've decided to take this as a literal interpretation of the state of Equestrian government and society. This will be explained and expanded on in this chapter.
Just don't let the political views expressed herein turn you off from the story. Please?
On Demonology
Starlight was a bit surprised by just how many railroad spikes that Henry had ordered. Not that it was too much for her to handle, of course. After all, she was a powerful unicorn. It wasn't like she couldn't carry them in her magic. 'I wished I had brought my saddlebags, though,' she complained to herself.
By now, the sun was past its zenith, but hadn't yet dropped low in the sky. Starlight guessed it was closer to tea time than to dinner time, and while she'd rather take tea either back at the castle or at Sugar Cube Corner, she made her way through the waning crowds to Bon Bon's.
Sure enough, Henry was waiting for her on the road right in front of the shop, a paper bag clutched in the crook of one arm. Once he spotted her, he waved her over. Once she got close, he took the floating bundles of railroad spikes and tucked them into the paper bag.
"So, you ready for this?" he asked her quietly when she got close.
"Ready for what?"
"Well, Bon Bon can be a bit... abrasive at times, and Lyra is..." he trailed off, rolling a claw in the air in front of himself as if he could snatch the words he was looking for out of thin air. "... intense," he finished lamely.
Starlight snorted a bit. "Can't be worse than Pinkie Pie on a sugar rush."
"Well, no, probably not," he admitted, "but, well... let's just say that her enthusiasm over meeting a human is still a bit over the top."
"Aww, c'mon, Henry, how bad could she be?" Starlight asked.
"You just had to say it," he replied, one claw over his eyes as he followed her into the shop.
A little brass bell chimed out a cheery tune when Starlight opened the door. Red vinyl booth seats lined the walls, clashing cheerily with the teal tabletops with chrome trim around the edges. The hardwood floor was painted with a white and black checkerboard pattern. A soda bar ran the length of the wall opposite the front door with evenly space bar stools in front of it. It was a little quaint for her tastes, but if the goal was an old timey kind of feel, they succeeded. It was almost like stepping back in time a few decades into the kind of soda shop her mother would have gone dancing in during her teenage years. An antique jukebox was even playing antique records of antique rock and roll.
"Hello!" A cheery voice called from the kitchen behind the bar. "I'll be with you in a sec!"
Starlight took a minute to walk around and look at the antique decor. For a period soda shop (and candy store, judging by the glass jars behind the counter) it felt more genuine than any other period or theme restaurant she'd visited before.
"Sorry about that," the cream colored earth pony mare said as she walked through the swinging doors to the kitchen. "What can I... oh, it's just you."
Bon Bon's smile and cheerful voice faded into a deadpan once she saw Henry standing just inside the front door. "I'll go get Lyra,"
"Why hello, Bon Bon, nice to see you too, Bon Bon," Henry droned, his words dripping with sarcasm. "I'm doing quite well, how about you?"
"Ugh," was her only reply as she walked to the base of the stairs. A large sign above them said "Private: Do Not Enter"
"LYRA! YOUR SEX DEMON IS HERE!" Bon Bon shouted up the stairs. There was a loud crash, a yelp, the sound of hooves scrambling on hardwood, and then with a thop-thop-thoping, a mint green unicorn raced down the stairs.
Lyra's hooves scrabble for grip as she slid sideways out of the doorway, a manic grin stretched widely across her face. The little green unicorn sprinted all out at her human friend, cried out "Henry!" at the top of her lungs, and leapt into the air.
All four legs wrapped around the human's torso, driving the breath from his lungs, but despite the impact, Henry wrapped his own arms around her, if only to keep her from falling off.
"Ugh, Lyra!" Bon Bon complained. "Do you have to do that every time?"
"Yes!" the shameless unicorn shouted over her shoulder and stuck her tongue out at her earth pony friend.
"Good to see you too, Lyra," Henry sighed.
Lyra leaned her head on the human's shoulder and took a deep breath through her nose.
"Aww," she whined. "You used your scent-blocking soap today, didn't you?"
"I use it every time I come to town," Henry replied as he separated her from his torso and sat her down on the floor.
"That's no fun," she pouted.
"Neither is getting chased by a mob of randy ponies."
"I dunno about that," Bon Bon interjected. "It is kinda fun seeing you flee in terror."
"See?! She agrees with me!" Lyra pointed at her friend.
"For a completely different reason," Henry muttered.
"Uh, what's this about scent-blocking soap?" Starlight asked.
"You haven't told her yet?" Lyra asked. "Ooo, can I tell her?"
The little green unicorn bounced up and down in place, doing a remarkable imitation of a certain pink pony. Who probably sneezed somewhere right at that moment.
"I think," he firmly said, "that we should get some drinks, sit down, and do intoductions first, don't you think?"
"... well, so long as you're paying," Bon Bon waved everyone over to the bar. As everyone else got settled in their seats, she quickly tied on an apron and slipped into the work area.
"What d'ya want," she asked gruffly.
"Can I get a mint julip?" Lyra asked.
"I'd like a root beer float, but with peach soda instead of root beer and strawberry sherbert instead of ice cream, please," the tall human asked from his uncomfortably low (for him) bar stool.
Bon Bon got started on the drinks while the other two turned to look at Starlight, who was busy perusing the menu.
"Oh, it all looks so good," she said. "I guess maybe just a chocolate malt?"
"Coming right up," the earth pony said.
Henry had somehow wound up sitting between Lyra and Starlight, but since the two unicorns had to brace themselves against the bar to stay seated upright, they could see each other without their human friend being in the way.
"Ok, so, we should probably start with introductions," Henry said. "Starlight, this is my friend Lyra Heartstrings. She's a concert lyrist and harpist with the Canterlot Royal Symphony, amateur cryptozoologist, and most recently, daemonologist-"
"I think you mean 'Demon Summoner Extraordinaire?" Lyra interjected with a grin.
"You can be a demon summoner once you actually successfully summon a demon."
"Which is highly illegal," Starlight interjected.
Lyra giggled nervously and rubbed one forehoof with the other. "Of course. I knew that."
Starlight didn't look entirely convinced.
"... Anyway, moving on," Henry continued and awkwardly coughed into one fisted claw. "Ms. Grumpy Pants over there is Bon Bon, business mare and entrepreneur, and she makes the most delicious chocolates and candies I've ever had."
"Hey," she grunted as she set three finished drinks in front of them.
"And this," Henry pointed to Starlight, "is my new friend Starlight Glimmer. We ran into each other near the market and struck up a conversation."
"It's nice to make your aquaintence," Starlight said as she held out a hoof. Bon Bon grunted and tapped her hoof with one of her own.
"Nice to meet you too!" Lyra exclaimed. "Any friend of Henry's is a friend of mine."
"I figured I should treat her to the best soda shop in town while I was here," he added.
"I was wondering about that," Lyra said. "Your monthly shopping trip isn't until next week, isn't it?"
"Yes, but some weevils got into my flour, so I had to come into town to pick up some more."
"Ick," Lyra stuck out her tongue in disgust at the thought of insect-infested flour. Bon Bon rolled her eyes at her friend foalish behavior.
"Well, either way, it's good to see you in town," Lyra said as she laid a hoof on Henry's foreleg. "And you made a new friend all on your own!"
"Your Equestrian is improving too," Bon Bon interjected. "Your accent isn't as obvious as it was before."
"Well, I had a good teacher," he replied and smiled at her. Bon Bon frowned, crossed her forehooves across her chest, and turned away from the human. But a light blush on her cheeks belied her true feelings on the matter.
"Wait a sec," Starlight said, waving a hoof. "You taught Henry Equestrian?"
Before Bon Bon could deliver a scathing retort, Henry jumped in by saying "Yes, she did, even when she didn't need to, and I'm very thankful for her help."
Starlight grinned and chuckled nervously. Bon Bon scowled. Henry rubbed the bridge of his nose. Lyra slurped her drink. The awkward silence stretched on for a few moments, broken only by Lyra enjoying her mint julip.
"So..." Starlight nervously began, "what was with the scent suppressing soap?"
Henry started to reply, but Lyra interrupted him, saying "Oh, that's to block his Aura of Seduction!"
"His what?" Starlight deadpanned.
"His Aura of Seduction. It's part of his inherent nature as a sex demon! It can't be blocked by magic at all. Not by magic supressors, not by shields or wards, or even by mental protection amulets. Ars Daemonica says so."
"That's because it's not a magical aura. It's just the pheromones in my sweat." Henry clarified. "But we didn't discover that for a few months."
"Lyra couldn't keep her hooves off him," Bon Bon scoffed.
Starlight screwed up her face in confusion. "Wait, you emit pheremones?"
Henry sighed. "Yes. It's an evolutionary adaptation in my species that repulses human females except when they are in estrus, during which it attracts them instead. This ensures that human females are willing to mate with a given male when they are at their most fertile, ensuring the continuation of the species."
Henry grimaced. "It turns out, it has the exact opposite effect on mares."
"Yup!" Lyra exclaimed. "He's completely irresistable! Well, when he's not using his special soap. But I can't stand being near him during heat week, his Aura of Seduction makes me nauseous then."
"Pffft-" Starlight desperately tried to keep a straight face and not burst out laughing at her new friend's predicament, and while she was successful at holding back her laugh, by the defeated slump of Henry's shoulders, he caught on anyway.
"It's not funny," he complained. "Especially because it works on stallions, too."
"Bwaa hah hah hah a haha haaaaaah!" Starlight couldn't hold in her laughter anymore, and it burst out of her mouth with raucous abandon. So taken by the humor of the situation, she even started pounding a hoof against the bar top, rattling the glasses their drinks were in. Lyra burst into giggles of her own, and even Bon Bon smirked at the poor, humiliated human.
"Not. Funny." he ground out from between clenched teeth. Starlight and Lyra only laughed harder.
"That's actually how we first met him," Bon Bon said with a touch of evil glee creeping into her voice. "Lyra and I were just sitting in the park a few days after Discord's defeat, enjoying the normality, when all of a sudden this guy come tearing through the park, being chased by a crowd of ponies, stallions and mares alike."
"It was almost as bad as the Smarty Pants Incident," Lyra explained. Starlight recalled the story that Applejack had told her about the time that Twilight had enchanted her old stuffed doll with a Want-It-Need-It spell and threw the whole town into chaos. Her laughter, which had started to calm down, intensified instead.
"I don't see what's so funny about being chased out of town by a crowd of rapey ponies," he groused.
"I dunno," Bon Bon needled him, "the look of abject terror on your face was pretty funny."
"Uh huh. I'm sure it would have still been funny if they had caught me, held me down, and had their way with me too."
"Eh..." Bon Bon waved a hoof back and forth in the air like a scale measuring the possible humor of the hypothetical situation.
"But it turned out ok," Lyra interrupted, "because Bonnie distracted the crowd while I smuggled him back here."
"Dealing with only one or two rapey ponies is a lot easier than dealing with a while village worths." Henry added.
"It was really that bad?" Starlight asked, her ears folding back against her skull at the though of being so... agressively pursued.
"Like I said, the 'Aura' is caused by pheremones in my sweat. At that point, I hadn't had a bath in days, and between the high temperatures and the exertion of running, I was sweating buckets by that point, so pretty much every pony I walked past got a big whiff."
"Luckily," Lyra interjected, "I had already read up on humans in my Demonology studies. The old summoners always assumed the Aura was a magic effect, but couldn't figure out how to block it. However, they did list a number of mind-enhancing spells and potions that could help a summoner resist the effects."
"Meaning she still got horny, but at least she could keep herself on task," Henry teased her.
"So, is this the part that she tried to make a pact with you?" Starlight asked.
"Yes," he chuckled a bit. "It didn't go so well, truth be told. She lured me into the kitchen by waving fruit in front of my face, and I'm ashamed to admit that I was tired and hungry enough to follow. She got me to sit down at the kitchen table and just tossed a bunch of food in front of me. Since that included bread and and jar of mayonnaise, I made a sandwich."
"While he was distracted by the food," Lyra interrupted, "I managed to get a binding circle drawn around him. By the time I was done, he had just about inhaled everything I'd put in front of him. So, I activated it."
"It was a bit of a shock to suddenly be surrounded by purple flames, you know."
"So, you're bound to Lyra?" Starlight asked.
"Not anymore," Lyra pouted.
"You're saying he had been bound to you, but now he isn't?"
"You have to understand," Henry explained, "that my situation wasn't like demon summoning in books and novels. I didn't speak Equestrian when Discord brought me here. But, the binding circle has a... what did you call it, Lyra?"
"Um... do you mean the Glyph of True Speech?"
"That's the one. It had that, so even if she and I were speaking completely different languages-"
"You'd be able to understand each other!" Starlight interjected excitedly. "And you wouldn't be able to lie to each other. That's pretty smart," she praised the minty unicorn.
"Mm hmm! It was one of Dark Fire's '10 tips for a successful demon binding'."
"So, even though you aren't bound to her anymore, what were the terms of the pact?" She asked. Henry and Lyra looked at each other. He grimaced, she grinned.
"Well..." Lyra started to say. She looked over at Henry and gave him the puppy dog eyes. He sighed and waved her on. "I wanted to make him have sex with me every night, but he refused those terms. And the terms for every other night. And once a week. After that, it wouldn't have been worth it. So instead, he had to let me study his anatomy and behavior, and he agreed! I've got a whole notebook filled with everything I could think of!"
"Henry, what did you ask for in return?"
"... while I probably could have worded it better, I got lessons in Equestrian until I knew enough to survive on my own."
"Probably a good idea," she said. "It definitely explains why you're living out in the Everfree Forest. The wording of your pact would have made Lyra offer you food and shelter until you knew enough Equestrian to aquire your own, when the pact would have made you move out."
"Wait, that's why you moved out?" Bon Bon growled slightly. "And here I though you had finally taken the hint."
"Bonnie wasn't very happy that I'd made a deal with a demon, and part of that deal meant Henry here became a long-term guest."
"Hey, I was only here for like 3 months," Henry interjected. "Besides, I pitched in around the house where I could."
"Poorly." Three guesses who said that, and the first two don't count.
Still, Henry just rolled his eyes. Apparently he was rather used to Bon Bon's unfriendly behavior.
"You know," Starlight turned toward Bon Bon and said, "I get the feeling you don't like Henry very much. Or... at all."
"Gee, what was your first clue," she sarcastically replied.
Just a little irritated at the treatment her new friend was recieving, Starlight forced a smile. It wasn't very convincing. Still, she held her tongue. No need to go making enemies where I don't have to, she thought to herself.
Henry shifted in his seat a bit before polishing off the last of his drink, the last of the three to do so. Once he was done, he fished around in his pouch and pulled out a moderately sized gold nugget and slid it across the bar top.
"Here," he said, "for the drinks, and for my usual."
Bon Bon nodded, picked up the nugget, deposited it into the cash register, and set about taking various individually wrapped hard candies from the glass jars on the shelves behind the bar, and placing them in a small paper bag. Henry stood from the too-small stool and did a few stretches to get the blood flowing in his legs once more.
"Well, it's always nice to stop by and visit you two, but I've got a long trek back to my cabin, and I'd rather not try to make it in the dark," the human sex demon said.
"Aww, do you have to go so soon?" Lyra whined.
"I'm afraid so."
"Well, ok, but make sure you visit again next week when you come to town for your regular shopping trip!"
"Sure thing, Lyra," Henry promised. He took the bag of candies from Bon Bon, placed him in the larger paper bag that held his other purchases, and started towards the door. Starlight stood up and followed him.
"Thanks for the drinks!" she called over her shoulder. "It was nice to meet you!"
"Same here!" Lyra replied. "Hope to see you around!"
As the door closed behind her, Starlight's sensitive hearing heard Lyra grumble "Do you have to treat him like that every-" before the door shut and cut off the rest.
They walked down the road, side by side, in the general direction of the Everfree Forest. The sun had dropped a bit lower in the sky, but it wasn't quite dinner time, Starlight guessed. Still, few ponies were out and about, and the few that were gave Henry (and Starlight by proximity) a wide berth.
"Well... you certainly weren't joking about your... friends..." Starlight drew the last word out, making it clear that, from her perspective, they were anything but.
"Yeah," Henry nodded. "I'm grateful to the both of them for helping me out when I first arrived, but... well, it's a complicated situation. Lyra has made it clear that she wants me around too much, and Bon Bon has made it clear that she doesn't want me around-"
"That's an understatement," Starlight groused.
"... at all, really, except as a paying customer."
"An overpaying customer," Starlight interjected. "Between the drinks and candy, your bill shouldn't have been more than 20 bits, and that nugget you paid with had to be worth at least 100, if not more."
"Ah... yeah, that's true enough," he sighed. "The banks won't do business with me because I can't provide either proof of residency or a mailing address and the various jewellers in town don't offer me very good exchange rates. It's a lot easier just to pay for my purchases with these nuggets directly, even though I know I'm getting taken advantage of."
"So you just let it happen?" she exclaimed incredulously.
"I don't have much of a choice," Henry grumbled. "Besides, I don't mind it so much coming from Bon Bon, mostly because I feel like I owe her for her hospitality way back when. Also, even though it was supposed to be Lyra's responsibility to teach me Equestrian, Lyra is... well, a poor combination of lazy and forgetful when it comes to anything not relating to either music or her hobbies. So Bon Bon ended up shouldering most of the burden when it came to my Equestrian lessons."
"I just don't see how you could put up with that kind of abuse," Starlight complained.
"Look, its..." he trailed off and looked around. They were nearing the edge of the village by now, so the stretch of road they were on was nearly deserted, and the few stragglers were well out of earshot. "Look, can you promise to keep a secret?"
"I promise,"
"Ok, so... Bon Bon grew up in a very liberal household, and early on in her teenage years, she realized she wasn't attracted to stallions. Like, at all."
"Wait, she's-" Starlight cut off the rest of her sentence when her much taller friend loomed over her and glared.
"Yes. She has accepted it and embraced it, despite that kind of lifestyle being socially unacceptable here in Equestria." His glare softened somewhat and he stopped looming. "She was comfortable with who and what she was. Then I show up as an unannounced, unwanted guest, and my 'Aura' suddenly makes her feel attraction to a male for the first time in her life. Ever."
He paused and looked off towards the woods, a rictus of deep contemplation on his face.
"My presence in her life brought up questions about herself and her sexuality that she had thought long settled. I quite literally put her through an existential crisis." He sighed and no shook his head. "Lyra was, in many ways, just the opposite. Her family was a well-to-do conservative and traditional unicorn family, just shy of being considered nouveau riche."
"I take it that Lyra's parents were the ambitious type?" Starlight asked.
"Of the worst sort," he confirmed. "They had plans to betroth her to a colt from a noble family. Lyra didn't go along with it, mind you. She's too much of a free spirit to conform to traditions, and she'd rather play her music or study myths and urban legends than elevate her family's status. It didn't help that she also isn't attracted to stallions."
"Except for you," Starlight pointed out.
"Except me," he sighed. "In Lyra's situation, though, her traditional upbringing managed to instil many of the traditional values when it comes to sex. She completely denies the possibility of being romantically or sexually involved with another mare. So, since I'm the only male anything she's ever felt any attraction towards, she's convinced herself that becoming intimate with me is her only chance of not living a life of chastity."
"And let me guess," Starlight sighed, "Bon Bon is hopelessly in love with her, isn't she?"
"I'm afraid so," he admitted.
"It's like something out of a trashy romance novel," she complained. He shrugged. "Well, despite not rutting the two of them senseless, you're certainly living up to your reputation as a sex demon. Homewrecker," she teased.
"Not intentionally," he muttered.
"So..." Starlight drew the word out, stalling for time as she tried to choose her words. "I take it that... uh, homosexuality isn't... socially unacceptable where you're from?"
"Hmm. That's... a complicated situation. The short answer is that it used to be, but isn't anymore."
"And the long answer?"
"Ah, well... this is going to be a bit difficult to explain," he said. "To put it in Equestrian terms, imagine that around 50 years go, the Diarchy was being run by a combination of Unicorn Supremacists and Mare Supremacists, but a series of peaceful protests got the laws that limited and restricted their rights and freedoms repealed. This included gay rights."
"Oh." Starlight blinked a bit in mild shock. "Your nation was being run by tribalists and sexists?"
"More or less. Please keep in mind that I'm drastically oversimplifying the situation, it was a lot more complicated and nuanced, but the overall situation was oppressive to certain groups," he explained. "This happened over the course of a decade, and it's commonly referred to as the... uh, what would it be in Equestrian... something like... Civil Rights Movement? I think that's right."
"You know, it sounds like your people made some significant strides towards Equality," Starlight said.
"More or less. It wasn't a perfect situation when I was brought here," he explained. "Some people were arguing that Equality had been achieved, others were arguing that there was still more to do, and some others were arguing that things had been taken too far and that the former oppressors were now being oppressed."
"How could Equality be taken too far?" Starlight asked.
"Hmm. Well, hypothetically speaking, imagine that the Diarchy had been ruled by unicorn supremacists. After a long time, earth ponies band together and overthrow the unicorn regime, and put their own government in place. Then they take all the same restrictive and oppressive laws that they hated and rewrote them to apply to unicorns instead."
"But... that's not very equal," she pointed out. "That would be some kind of earth pony supremacy."
"Exactly," he replied. "Granted, that's a gross oversimplification, but it's an apt analogy."
"What do you think?" she asked.
"I think, since I'm now living here in Equestria, that my opinion on the political situation back home is irrelevant."
"Well, what do you think about the state of Equality here in Equestria?" she asked.
"... do you want a polite answer or do you want honesty," he replied.
"Uh... honesty?" she said, unsure.
"What Equality?" he rhetorically asked.
Starlight blinked in shock. 'Did he really just...?'
"Could you elaborate?" she asked sharply, her ire rising. Henry looked down at her, his face wooden.
"Are you sure you want to know?" he asked.
"Yes. While I'd be the first pony to tell you that I know Equestria needs more Equality, we hold the Virtues of Harmony as core values in our society," she explained a little hotly.
"Very well," he sighed. "Homosexuality is not just socially unacceptable, a pony engaging in homosexual acts faces fines and jail time. Interspecies relationships are not frowned upon quite as much, but marriages between a pony and a non-pony are illegal. No forms of recreational narcotics are allowed, no alcohol, no tobacco, no marijuana, Tartarus, even caffeine is regulated. Marriages are restricted to one mare and one stallion, even though your birth rates are approximately three or four mares to one stallion."
Shocked by the rapid-fire list her human friend was spitting, Starlight took a step back and raised one of her forehooves in front of her chest.
"That's not even getting into the concept of sapient rights," Henry continued unabated. "Under the Diarchy, no fundamental rights are guaranteed. The power of the rulers are completely absolute. For example, Princess Twilight Sparkle could have me arrested and jailed indefinitely with no right to a trial or legal defense. Hay, she could have anyone arrested and jailed without a trial. Additionally, the common pony has very little say in how the government is run, and what little say they do have extends only to the election of a local mayor or governor."
'I had no idea it was this bad,' Starlight thought to herself, more than a little shocked by just how many flaws in her society Henry was pointing out.
"And on the subject of Equality," he wagged a finger at her, "there's no way you can claim that a farm pony has the same opportunities as a noble pony like Prince Blueblood. Even ignoring the difference in wealth between the two, simply by virtue of the additional legal rights and powers afforded to him by his status as a noble, Blueblood has more power and opportunity than the simple farm pony. In fact, by having a class of noble families with additional legal rights inherently sets them above the common pony. That is in no way, shape, or form Equality."
Starlight grinned nervously. Henry was standing across from her, hands on his hips, a little red in the face. His pursed lips tightened his features, highlighting just how different his muzzle-less face was from a pony's. Time dragged on as they stood across from each other, the awkward silence to difficult to break. Eventually, Henry sighed and rand a hand down his face.
"I'm sorry about that," he said softly. "I've had time to read a lot. I looked for a long time to try and find a way to integrate myself into Equestria, but I couldn't find any kind of legal solutions, so I just stayed out in the forest. I didn't mean to take my anger out on you."
"It's ok," Starlight reassured him. "I guess I didn't know how... unequal my country is. I mean, I knew that how you had been treated was unfair, but I hadn't realized..."
"Don't get me wrong," Henry interrupted her. "Your society is overall happy and peaceful. Aside from my own and Lyra and Bon Bon's situations, I haven't seen any direct oppression or discrimination. I guess I'm letting my own prejudices get the best of me."
"But you still raise some good points," she told him. "I mean, interspecies relationships aren't very common, but I guess I don't see any reason why they shouldn't be able to marry."
Henry smiled and sighed in relief.
"As for... homosexual relationships," Starlight continued, "I guess I never considered it. I mean, I've never met any gay ponies. Or at least, I don't think I have."
"There are several here in Ponyville that I've seen," Henry admitted, "but they do their best to hide it in order to fit in."
"Really? I mean, aside from Bon Bon and Lyra," she asked.
"Oh, sure. It's obvious when you know what to look for."
Starlight frowned and considered it. "I guess it's just weird having a gay pony around."
"What do you mean by that?" he asked gently.
"Well, I'm not gay. I've never even considered being with another mare," Starlight told him. "Or, really, even considered gay ponies at all. I mean, I know they exist, but I can't say I've ever met one. Well, before today anyway."
"You probably know several. Like I said, they hide it to fit in." He paused for a second and looked pensive. "Do you... have a problem with gay ponies?"
"W-what? No!" she denied the accusation. "I mean, I think it's a little bit weird. How would two mares even have sex anyway?"
"... do you really want to know?" Henry asked, the faintest hint of a grin on his lips.
"U-uh... no. Not really, no." Starlight grimaced.
"Still, I guess I don't see much of a difference between a mare and a stallion being together, a pony and a gryphon being together, and two mares or two stallions being together. Hay, with your gender ratios the way they are, I don't even think it would be much of a problem for several mares to be with one stallion."
"You mean like herding?" Starlight asked.
"Sure. Or flocks. Pre-unification earth pony and pegasi society actively encouraged multiple partner marriages," Henry explained.
"So why are one mare one stallion marriages the norm?" she asked.
"Well, single partner marriages were the norm for unicorns. Technically, Princess Celestia and Princess Luna were adopted by Princess Platinum during the Unification, and she abdicated her throne in favor of the Diarchs. The Earth Pony Republic and the Pegasus Hegemony were more or less annexed into the Unicorn Kingdom, which was reformed into the Diarchy of Equestria."
"... I know my history, you know," Starlight complained.
"Right, sorry about that. I tend to lecture," Henry admitted. "Still, the social norms and legal practices of the old Unicorn Kingdom stayed in place after the Unification."
"Still, that doesn't change the fact that two mares being together is unnatural," Starlight pointed out.
"Well, neither is agriculture, architecture, writing, engineering, or pretty much anything that makes this a civilization. Sapient beings have this wonderful thing called 'self-awareness' that allows us to be more than mere animals," he pointed out. "Besides, I don't see the problem with two adult beings being in love and wanting to be together."
Starlight opened her mouth to retort, but she couldn't seem to find the words to refute Henry's arguments. "I guess I see your point," she admitted.
"I'm not trying to turn you into a gay pony," Henry told her gently. "I'm only asking you to tolerate others' choices. You should be able to live how you want to live, but in turn you should allow others to live how they want to live."
"... I'll try," she conceded.
"That's all I ask."
"Still, I think you make some decent points," she continued. "I still have to introduce a friend to Princesses Twilight and Celestia tomorrow night, and I really think you would make an excellent guest. Hay, you could even bring up your observations about the current inequality in Equestria right to Princess Celestia! Who knows, maybe you could even convince her to make some changes!"
"Or I could get banished to the moon," he snarked.
"C'mon, she wouldn't do that to you," she cajoled him. "Please, Henry? I'd really appreciate it if you came."
Henry sighed and rubbed the bridge of his nose once more. "Ok, fine, I'll come, but if I get banished to the moon or something, you've got to promise me to get me out."
"I promise!"
"What time should I show up?" he asked.
"The dinner will be starting shortly after sundown, so come to Twilight's castle just before sunset."
"Alright, I'll be there," he sighed. "Look, I need to get going if I'm going to get back to my cabin before dark, and the Everfree isn't the safest place during the night."
"Ok. So, I'll see you tomorrow?"
"Yeah, I'll be there." Henry adjusted the paper bag with all of his purchases and started off towards the woods. Starlight couldn't help but grin a bit to herself. 'Make a new friend; check!' she mentally checked her friendship assignment off her list. Still, the day had been rather exciting, and she was feeling a bit wrung out.
As her human sex demon friend disappeared into the Everfree Forest, Starlight smiled and thought, 'Maybe a trip to the spa is in order,'
Her mind made up, she started towards the spa in search of some much needed rest and relaxation.
"Soup spoon, salad fork, pasta spoon, strawberry pick...!" Twilight reached out and adjusted the last gleaming silver utensil until it was perfectly geometrically aligned with the others. "I'm beginning to think that, after friendship, the greatest magic of all is proper silverware placement! " She giggled to herself.
"Twilight!" The purple pony princess turned to see her new student Starlight gallop into the large formal dining room with an excited smile stretched across her face. "Guess what! I made a new friend!"
"That's fantastic news!" Twilight replied.
"She's great," Starlight began as she came to a stop.
"Great!" Twilight replied with excitement.
"She's powerful!" Starlight continued.
"Powerful?" Twilight's face scrunched up in confusion.
"She's-" Starlight was interrrupted.
"Hello, Princess..." The Great and Powerful Trixie said as she walked through the doorway.
"Trixie?!"
Later that night after the sun had gone down and Starlight had finally returned to the castle after spending the day with her new friend Trixie, Twilight found her student curled up in an overstuffed wingback chair in front of the small fireplace in the Library Wing of the castle, a thick tome held in front of her in her magic.
"Hey, Starlight, do you have a minute?" Twilight asked her a little nervously.
"Sure, Twilight," Starlight replied. She floated a bookmark from the small table next to her chair and closed the book around it. With her attention fully on her teacher, she asked "What can I do for you?"
"Well, I wanted to talk to you about tomorrow's dinner party," the purple alicorn began, rubbing one forehoof with the other.
"What about it?"
"It's just... I'm not sure that Trixie would be the best kind of pony to introduce to Princess Celestia," Twilight rushed to say. "I mean, I know she's had a shady past, and I have forgiven her for it, but... well, I really want you to make a good impression on the Princess, and I don't think Trixie will reflect well on you."
"Oh. Well, that's alright, I guess," Starlight said with a half smile. "I already invited someone else."
"Oh! Well, it's probably for the best anyway," Twilight said with relief.
"Probably. Besides, my guest is very intelligent, highly educated, and well versed in political theory," Starlight said. "I'm sure he'll make a good conversation partner over dinner."
"Good!" Twilight said. The two stared at each other for an awkward moment. "Sooo.... who is it?" Twilight finally asked.
"That... is a secret." Starlight smirked.
"Oh. Well, will you let me guess who it is?"
"If you'd like," Starlight said as she reopened her book and kept reading where she left off. Twilight read the title, Ars Daemonica , but ignored it in favor of trying to guess who this mystery dinner guest was.
"Is it Pristine?" Twilight stepped closer to Starlight's chair.
"No."
"Is it Doctor Horse?"
"Nope."
"How about Bright Bulb? Filthy Rich? Is it Star Hunter?" Twilight asked, her voice rising with excitement as she danced on her hooftips.
"No, no, aaand... nope."
Twilight slumped a bit. "Well, then who is it?"
"You're just going to have to wait until he shows up tomorrow night. I told him to be here shortly before sunset."
"Ok," Twilight sighed.
"Either way, I'm proud of you, Starlight," Twilight continued as she turned towards the door. "You went out and made two new friends today. Even though I really don't think Trixie will be a good influence on you, I'm sure your mystery friend is a better choice as a dinner guest."
Starlight bit her tongue, stopping a snappy retort before it could escape her lips, her ire roused at the criticism of Trixie. Through slightly clenched teeth, she ground out, "I'm sure you'll be... pleasantly ... surprised."
"I'm sure I will," Twilight chirped as she left the library. "Goodnight, Starlight!"
"Goodnight," she replied.
Once the clopping of her mentor's hooves had faded, Starlight muttered to herself, "I just can't believe her! Going on and on about how she's forgiven Trixie for her past, but then turning around and doing everything she can to make sure I don't invite her to meet the Princess! Second chances my flank!"
Starlight took a deep, cleansing breath, exhaled, and let it carry her irritation out of her body. 'Well, both of the princesses will be in for a big surprise when Henry shows up tomorrow,' she thought to herself. Satisfied that, whatever ended up happening, the dinner was certain to be entertaining, Starlight returned to her book. She had some brushing up to do on sex demons in general and humans in particular.
The sun was just barely hovering over the horizon the following evening as Henry strode into town. His manticore-skin cloak and most of his leather bags and pouches were absent, but his belt, bow, quiver, and axe still hung from their usual spots. His shirt was made from a dark blue cotton with small wooden buttons down the front, but a good seamstress would see that it was poorly fitted and that the stitching was imperfect and obvious. His black cotton pants were similarly poorly crafted, but at least they were clean. Similarly inelegantly crafted black leather shoes with thick wooden soles covered his feet.
Henry shifted the small cloth bag he carried in the crook of his arm as he made his way towards the tall crystal castle on the edge of town. It sparkled in the sunset, reflecting the large orange setting sun in a dizzying array of prismatic colors, both standing out against the changing colors of the sky and yet blending into it in an admittedly breathtaking display. The streets were nearly deserted, and the few ponies he encountered gave him the wide berth that he was used to. It barely even bothered him anymore.
"Henry!" a voice called out, causing him to pause and see who had called him.
"Hello, Starlight," he greeted his new friend as she came galloping towards him. She slowed as she got close and panted lightly to regain her breath.
"Hey, about the dinner tonight," she began after a few moments. "I kinda made another friend yesterday..."
"Oh," Henry said with a bit of shock. "Well, congratulations. I guess my trip to town was a waste..."
"What? No!" Starlight exclaimed. "I just wanted to tell you that I won't be able to make the dinner tonight. My friend Trixie needs a hoof with a new trick, and she can't do it without my help."
"Oh?" he questioned.
"Yes. She's an illusionist, you see, and she travels Equestria doing shows," Starlight explained. "She has a show planned for tonight at the same time as the dinner, and the new trick she's going to try could kill her if I don't help her out."
"That... sounds dangerous."
"It is," she confirmed. "I need to be there to make sure that she doesn't get hurt. I just wanted to let you know so you didn't think I was just abandoning you. If you don't want to go to the dinner, you don't have to, but I would really really appreciate it if you did."
"Oh. Well, to be honest, I was kinda looking forward to it," he explained. He gestured to the small bag in his arms, "I even brought gifts for the Princesses."
"Thank you, Henry," Starlight told him as she placed a hoof on his thigh. "If the show ends soon enough, I might even make it for dessert."
"I hope to see you later, then," he said. "In any case, I better get to the castle. I don't want to be late."
"Ok. Oh, before I forget," Starlight continued. "Could you explain the situation to Twilight?"
"... I'm not sure how well she'll take the news," Henry cautioned her.
"Don't worry, It'll be fine."
"If you're sure..."
Starlight nodded and smiled at him.
"Ok. I'm off, then," Henry told her and started towards the castle.
Starlight waved him off, turned, and started making her way towards the other end of the village where, Henry assumed, the illusion show was going to take place. Despite the doubt and trepidation that filled him, he steeled his resolve. 'This is my best chance to gain a little bit of acceptance,' he thought to himself. 'Maybe I'll be a little more welcome around town if I make a good impression.'
When he got to the castle, he walked up the low steps to the front door. A small plaque inset on the wall next to the door said 'Doorbell', and a small rope hung out of a hole just above it. When Henry pulled it, he faintly heard the deep tolling of a large bell though the door. He stood there awkwardly, looking at the well cared for flower beds to either side of the porch, the perfectly trimmed lawn, and artfully shaped hedges around the lawn. While not on the level of the Palace of Versailles, it was beautiful in an unassuming manner. Like a large, expensive, suburban townhouse. His musing was interrupted by the door opening.
"Hello and welcome to the Castle of Friend..." the voice trailed off.
Twilight Sparkle, the Princess of Friendship herself had answered the door. Her gaze travelled up Henry's tall form, eyes getting wider and wider until she locked eyes with him. Her pupils dilated, her ears folded back against her skull, and her mouth opened wide.
"Hello," Henry said as gently as he could.
"You! " Twilight shouted as she widened her forelegs and dropped her head in a defensive stance. "What are you doing here, Chaos-spawn!"
"Starlight Glimmer invited me to dinner," he replied as he raised one of his hands in front of his chest protectively.
"You're Starlight's mystery guest?!" she gasped. "No! Absolutely not! This is completely unacceptable!"
"Oh, I wasn't aware that the Princess of Friendship would turn away her student's first friend in Ponyville," he said with a frown. "That doesn't sound very friendly to me."
"What?!" Twilight exclaimed.
"But I suppose that only some beings are worth being friends with," he continued as he stepped off the porch and half turned away. "Chaos-spawn aren't worth being friends with, but the Lord of Chaos and Disharmony himself is? Oh well. Good luck explaining to Princess Celestia that you turned away the guest that your student invited as part of a friendship lesson . I'm sure she'll be pleased to hear how well you've been teaching your student all about friendship ."
Henry made it halfway down the path away from the castle before he heard, "Wait!" He paused and looked back over his shoulder at the purple pony princess.
"I... I..." Twilight stuttered. She swallowed and tried again. "I... um... look, I can't just introduce you to Princess Celestia!" she exclaimed. "You aren't supposed to be here! Starlight was supposed to invite a pony , not a... a... whatever it is that you are!"
"I'm a human," he deadpanned.
"Starlight was supposed to go out into Ponyville and make a friend! A pony friend!"
"Starlight was kind enough to become friends with me despite the fact that I'm not a pony," Henry pointed out, "something that you can't seem to do. But I suppose the student has to surpass the teacher at some point," he continued as he turned and started walking away once more.
"Wait!"
He paused and looked over his shoulder once more, his face blank.
"I..." Twilight began once more, paused, and sighed. "You're right. I can't call myself the Princess of Friendship if I'm not willing to give every... uh..." she paused, searching for the right word.
"Everyone " Henry offered.
"Everyone a chance." She stepped to the side of the doorway and gestured into the castle. "Please, come inside."
Henry walked back up the path, across the porch, and through the door. "Thank you," he said politely as he crossed the threshold.
"The dining room is this way," Twilight said nervously as she gestured once more. Henry nodded and fell into step behind her, once more adjusting the bag of gifts he still carried in the crook of his arm.
"Starlight asked me to pass along her regrets," Henry started as they walked down the hall. "She has another engagement tonight that she couldn't decline, and asked me to inform you she will probably miss dinner, though she hopes to arrive during or shortly after dessert."
"Oh," Twilight started. "What other engagement could be more important than dinner with the Princess?"
"Apparently, the other friend she made yesterday is going to be performing a new trick at her show tonight, a very dangerous trick that she needs Starlight's help with."
Henry paused for a moment to let it sink in, before he continued. "But I would say that helping out a friend, especially if they may be in danger, is more important than a dinner party, even one with Princess Celestia."
Twilight opened her mouth to retort, paused, and then grimaced. "I suppose so," she said.
"Still, Starlight asked me to come to this dinner anyway, if only so that you could show Princess Celestia how good of a mentor you are for Starlight."
"Oh, right," Twilight replied with a nervous giggle. "That was... very kind of her."
"Besides, I was already in town when she told me, and I already had the customary gifts," he told her, gesturing to his bag.
"Uh... I'm pretty sure that gift giving isn't necessary for a dinner party," Twilight said.
"Well, in your culture it might not be, but in mine , a dinner party with a head of state requires a guest to bring a gift," he explained. "Though, the customary gift is a bottle of alcohol, but such things are illegal in Equestria, so I had to improvise."
"Oh. Well, that's very kind of you," Twilight said, a little bit surprised by just how polite this... thing was being. "So... um, what kind of culture do Chaos-spawn have?"
"I wouldn't know," he replied, "I'm not a Chaos-spawn."
"Of course you are!" Twilight replied. "Discord created you, didn't he?"
"No, actually, he didn't," Henry explained. "He reached into what I assume to be another universe and dragged me here. I suspect that's why I wasn't erased when you and your friends defeated him."
"Wait, so you're from another universe ?"
"Well, I assume so, but I can't be certain," he replied. "I could be from another planet in this universe, but considering magic doesn't exists where I'm from, I'm inclined to believe that I'm from another universe."
"What!" she exclaimed. "Magic is a fundamental force! The universe can't exist without it!"
"This universe can't exist without it," he retorted, "but I presume that the other five fundamental forces could be balanced in such a way as to allow a universe to exist without magic."
"Uh, don't you mean the other three fundamental forces?" she asked.
"No. Your scientists have discovered magic, electromagnetism, gravity, and the nuclear force," Henry told her. "When in my reality, we have discovered five; electromagnetism, gravity, the weak nuclear force, the strong nuclear force, and the {}Higgs{} mechanism."
"The strong nuclear force? Hyics mechanism?"
"Yes. While the weak nuclear force governs the behavior of atomic nuclei and the decay of protons and neutrons, the strong nuclear force governs the behavior of the smaller bits that protons and neutrons are made out of. The {}Higgs{} mechanism is a field that exists everywhere that gives sub-atomic particles their mass. Or, more appropriately, it allows energy to become matter," Henry lectured. "Of course, I'm going with the assumption that magic is entirely absent from my home universe."
"That's amazing!" Twilight exclaimed. "How did your species discover these forces?"
"Hmm... the short story is that we slammed protons together until they exploded, and then studied the pieces left behind."
Twilight blinked. "But how...?" she trailed off.
"I would be happy to explain a {}cyclotron{} to you at some point." When he saw Twilight's confusion, he added "A {}cyclotron{} is a simple particle accelerator."
"Oh," she said, surprised. "I had no idea that your people were so wise in the ways of science!"
"Well, we've never held much of a conversation before," he pointed out. Henry was proud that he managed to keep most of his bitterness from leaking into his voice.
"Oh. Right," Twilight laughed nervously. "Well, here we are!"
Her magic turned the doorknob and opened one of the double doors that lead to the large, formal dining hall where Princess Celestia was waiting for them. Henry gestured for her to enter first, and he followed her through the door.
"Sorry for the wait, Princess," Twilight began, nervous tension leaking out with her words. "But... uh... Starlight's guest and I were just getting acquainted."
Princess Celestia was taking a drink from the glass of water in front of her place setting when Twilight and Henry walked through the doors. Due to his tall stature, her eyes quickly found him. They widened in surprise, pupils dilating in shock. She spat water all over her place setting, quickly lept to her hooves, bumping the table as she did so, and shouted "DEMON!"
Henry barely had time to start in surprise before he was picked up by her golden aura and slammed into the dining room wall beside the door he had just entered through. A bubble of golden glowing energy encased him as he lay, spread eagled, suspended from the Princess's magical aura.
"Princess!" Twilight shouted. "What are you doing?!"
"You've been tricked, Twilight," Celestia said as she glared at the entrapped human. "That is a demon of a most foul sort!"
"But... I don't understand," Twilight said.
"Don't worry, Twilight," Celestia said. "I'll take care of it."
The solar princess nearly stomped her way over to where she had Henry pressed against the wall. Her mane was much more agitated than usual and her eyes were narrowed into a sharp glare.
"Who summoned you to this realm?" she demanded.
"D-discord!" Henry grunted. It was difficult to breathe when you're being pressed against a wall by a magical aura.
"You lie!" Celestia exclaimed. "Discord is reformed. Besides, he would never summon a foul being like yourself. Now tell me the truth! Who summoned you! "
"It's true!" Twilight exclaimed. "It happened almost five years ago when we beat Discord for the first time!"
"If that were true, why was it not returned from whence it came by the Elements?"
"I-I don't know!" Twilight told her. "He said that Discord just plucked him from his home universe."
"Is this true?!" Celestia asked her prisoner. "Were you brought here by portal and not by a summoning contract?"
"Y-yes!" Henry groaned out. The pressure relaxed somewhat, but it still kept him flush against the wall.
"How is it that you have managed to survive here, unbound as you are?" she questioned.
"I don't rely on a summoner's magic," he gasped as he tried to recover his breath. "My universe doesn't have magic!"
"If you are from some other universe then how did you come to speak Equestrian?"
"A friend taught me," he explained.
"Who was this friend?"
"I won't say," he told her, "unless you promise not to prosecute the ponies who helped me out when I first arrived."
Celestia considered it for a moment. "Did these ponies summon you?"
"No."
"Then they will not be prosecuted. You have my word."
Henry sighed in relief. "Lyra Heartstrings and her friend Bon Bon took me in and taught me Equestrian for my first few months here," he told her.
"Bon Bon? You are certain?" Celestia asked, her eyes widening.
"Yes."
"Hmm..." The Princess of the Sun mulled it over for a few moments. Henry began to shift uncomfortably in the magic grasp.
"Would you let me down now?" he asked her. "Or is this how you treat all your dinner guests."
"... I cannot release you," the princess told him cautiously. "I will not allow you to sway my or my fellow princess's mind with your 'Aura'"
"Oh, that," he sighed in relief. "You don't need to worry about that, I've already negated it."
"And how can I be sure that you will not simply engage it once you are released?" Celestia questioned him.
"It's not a magical aura," Henry explained in exasperation. "I can't turn it on or off at will. My species emits pheromones in our sweat, and I've already used scent-suppressing soap before coming to town today."
Princess Celestia narrowed her eyes at him, her eyebrows clenched together and a frown playing at the corner of her lips. She took a few steps closer and the magical bubble disappeared, though Henry remained pressed against the wall. The Princess leaned in close and took a few cautious sniffs. Her nose scrunched a bit in disgust, but she stepped back and nodded in satisfaction anyway.
"Very well." She turned to Twilight. "And this demon has not caused any trouble in the years it has been here?"
"W-well, no, not directly." Twilight said, nervously. Celestia raised an eyebrow, prompting Twilight to continue, "Well, in the first few months, ponies were highly uncomfortable around it, some even taking to chasing it around town, but it hasn't hurt anypony as far as I know."
"And after the first few months?"
"Ponies stopped chasing it, but it was only in town once a month or so to barter for stuff at the market," Twilight explained.
"And where did you live during this time?" Celestia questioned him.
"I built a cabin deep in the Everfree Forest," Henry told her. "Also, I'd prefer if you stop calling me an 'it'. I'm a male."
"Very well. Since you seem to be no threat, I will release you on your word that you continue your good behavior."
"You have my word," he replied.
Celestia released her magic hold, causing him to fall to the floor. To his credit, Henry caught himself in a three point stance before he could fall face-first into the hard crystal floor. He stood and brushed his clothes off. Princess Celestia took a step back in surprise when she found that she had to look up to meet him eye to eye.
"Well, I had brought gifts," he gestured to the cloth bag still laying in the doorway to the dining room, "but they are likely ruined now."
Twilight floated the bag over, opened it up, and dumped the contents out onto the floor. A few sheets of parchment and a good number of clay shards clumped together in a gooey wad fell out with a splat.
"I had brought a jar of fine Everfree honey and some technical blueprints," he said, gesturing to the mass of indistinguishable runny inkblots on parchment and the ruined honey they were covered in, "but I'm afraid all I have to offer are my apologies."
"Ah... well, I..." Princess Celestia searched for words, but they didn't seem to want to come to her.
"Technical blueprints?" Twilight asked.
"Yes. Starlight had mentioned that Equestrian engineers and scientists have been attempting to create internal combustion engines, so I took the time to draw out several different kinds that my people have long since mastered." He sighed and ran a hand through his hair. "I'm sorry that I won't be able to gift them to you anymore."
"But... but... the science !" Twilight whined.
"I'm also sorry about your gift," he said to the sun princess. "I've heard that Everfree honey is the most delicious, and I had hoped you would enjoy a jar of it to sweeten your tea."
"Ah... well, yes, it is the best," she confirmed with no small amount of chagrin.
"As it stands, though, I'm afraid that I've overstayed my welcome," he continued, his voice a little strained and his face a little red. He plucked the soiled cloth bag out of Twilight's magical grasp, and strode towards the door. "Good Evening!" he said, perhaps a touch too forcefully.
Both Twilight and Celestia flinched back at the unstated rebuke, even as the human strode down the hall towards the front door. Celestia looked at the mess on the floor, the scuff marks on the wall and floor, and then over her shoulder at the table. Four immaculate place settings and a dripping ice sculpture silently taunted her.
"Twilight," she began, "I'm afraid I've made quite a mess of things."
"No, Princess, it wasn't your fault," Twilight tried to comfort her mentor, even though tears threatened to spill from her eyes.
"I think it is," Celestia sighed. A flash of light erupted over her head and a scroll dropped into her magical grasp. She unfurled it and started to read.
Dear Princess Celestia, My friends and I all learned an important lesson this week; never judge a book by it's cover. Someone may look unusual, or funny, or scary, but you have to look past that and learn who they are inside. Real friends don't care what your cover is, it's the contents of a pony that count, and a good friend, like a good book, is something that will last forever. Your Faithful Student, Twilight Sparkle.
Twilight hung her head in shame. It had never even occurred to her that this tall being could be similar to her friend Zecora. 'In fact, their situations are very similar,' she thought to herself. 'They both were ostracized by the villagers, they both live out in the Everfree Forest, and they both were accused of doing evil things to ponies. And what's worse is that I never even asked him for his name! '
"I'm afraid that I hadn't learned this lesson as well as I'd hoped," Celestia admitted.
"I should have remembered the lesson Zecora taught me," Twilight commiserated. "Zecora and... and I didn't even ask him his name!" she chastised herself.
"I never asked him either."
"And he and Zecora were so similar!" Twilight berated herself. "They both were ostracized and forced to live out in the woods."
"Nearly identical," the sun princess agreed.
"So why did I make friends with Zecora, but not him?" Twilight moaned. "I'm a failure as a princess!"
"Oh Twilight," Celestia tried to console her former student as she lay a wing across the younger alicorn's back. "You sent that lesson to me, so I am just as much at fault for failing to learn from it."
"Oh Princess," Twilight cried. "What are we going to do?"
"I believe that we should offer our apologies and make amends," Celestia replied, feeling just as ashamed as Twilight looked. "Maybe if we hurry, we can catch him before he leaves town?"
"Do you think he would forgive us?" Twilight asked, perhaps a touch desperately.
"I think that if we are sincere enough with our apologies, he will."
"Right!" Twilight said with resolve. "Let's go!"
Twilight broke into a gallop and ran down the hallway all the way to the front door. Celestia, despite years of sitting on her throne and eating as much cake as she desired, managed to keep up, if only because of her longer legs. The Princess of Friendship reached out with her magic and opened the door before the two collided with it and they burst out of the castle. The human was nowhere in sight.
"Twilight, you search the village. I will try to spot him from the air," Celestia commanded as she spread her wings to take flight.
"Right!"
Twilight galloped into town, looking left and right down the crossroads as she passed them, searching for the dinner guest she had treated so rudely. Celestia, meanwhile, lept into the sky and, thanks to her large wings, quickly climbed to cloud level and began circling the town from above.
'I wonder if he went looking for Starlight, ' Twilight thought to herself. Having seen where Trixie was going to be holding her show, she veered off down one of the sidestreets, her eyes still peeled for the human as she made her way to the show. She didn't manage to find him as she slid to a stop on the edge of the crowd. It seemed he wasn't there.
Celestia, meanwhile, began searching in the general direction of the Everfree Forest, taking extra care to search between the houses and shops below her, but as she began approaching the edge of the forest, her heart sank. There was no sign of him, and the dense canopy of the wild woods would make it impossible to spot him from the air.
She landed just shy of the forest edge and stomped a hoof as she exclaimed "Ponyfeathers!"
With a sigh, Celestia returned to the air and soared back to her former student's castle. 'With any luck, Starlight Glimmer will know where to find him, ' she thought to herself. 'Now we just have to wait until she returns. '
Author's Note
Well. So much for dinner.
This chapter kinda got away from me a bit and went in a different direction than I had originally wanted it to, but it all flowed out so quickly and smoothly I couldn't bear to change it. Especially because I got it all done in one sitting, over the course of about 5 hours or so.
Until next time!
'She really is an amazing performer ,' Starlight thought to herself. Despite needing her help, Trixie had pulled off her new trick with spectacular showmareship and the pomp and circumstance she was renowned for. Of course, now that the show was over, Starlight was returning to her room at the Castle of Friendship. 'It's too bad I couldn't make it back in time for dessert,' she mentally complained as her stomach rumbled.
Still, she decided to forego a trip to the kitchens and instead walked up several flights of stairs to the floor her room was on. As she rounded the corner and started down the hallway, she spotted Twilight wearing a rut in the floor in front of her door.
"Twilight!" she exclaimed with surprise. The purple alicorn jumped in surprise and turned towards her student. "How did the dinner go?" Starlight asked as she trotted closer.
"There you are, Starlight," Twilight sighed in relief. "I've been looking all over for you! Where have you been?"
"Uh," she stammered, a little out off by Twilight's blitzkrieg questionaire. "At Trixie's show?" she continued hesitantly.
"I looked for you there, but I didn't see you," Twilight accused her.
"I was backstage," she explained.
"Oh," the alicorn replied. She gave a sheepish grin when she saw the irritation in Starlight's expression. "Erm, sorry?"
"It's fine," Starlight sighed. "I take it the dinner didn't go so well?"
"Well, you could say that..." Twilight giggled nervously.
Starlight rolled her eyes and asked, "What happend?"
"Well," Twilight drew out the word as she hesitated. "I kind of tried to turn him away at the door," she admitted, shamefaced.
"Ugh, Twilight," the unicorn facehooved. "So you just turned him away? Just like that?"
"No, your friend pointed out how... hypocritical I was being, so I let him in."
"Oh, good!" Starlight brightened a bit. "So was he as intelligent and knowledgeable as I told you he was?"
"Well, yes," Twilight admitted. "We had a discussion on advanced physics on the way to the dining room. Did you know that his people have discovered five fundamental forces, but Magic isn't one of them?"
"Really?" Starlight blinked. "But that would mean-"
"His universe has no magic! Or, well, if it does his people haven't discovered it yet," Twilight enthused.
"But that goes completely against One Cup's Theory of Magical Relativity!" Starlight exclaimed.
"I know, right? Even if physics in his home world works completely different to how they work here, just learning what his people know and how they discovered it could advance our understanding of nature by decades!"
"See, I knew that if you just talked to him you'd find a lot in common," Starlight teased.
"You're right," Twilight admitted. "That was one of the first friendship lessons I ever learned. 'Don't judge a book by its cover', but..." she sighed. "I guess I never really gave him a chance, did I?"
"No, you didnt." Starlight said a little harshly, but she continued in a gentler tone, "but maybe now you'll finally be able get to know him."
Twilight slumped. "Somehow, I doubt it."
"What do you mean?" Starlight asked.
"After tonight's dinner, I don't think he'll want to speak to me again," Twilight moaned, tears pooling in the corners of her eyes.
"It went that bad?" She asked.
"Yes. It wasn't his fault," Twilight explained when she saw Starlight's stormy expression. "The princess... well, she knew he was a demon, and... well, she kinda held him against the wall and interrogated him."
"She what?" Starlight ground out through gritted teeth.
"She thought he was here to trick us or use some kind of mind control spell or something," Twilight defended her mentor. "But... well, he was really angry, especially because the gifts he brought got ruined, so he left before we even sat down."
"Gee, I wonder why," Starlight muttered under her breath, but Twilight's bowed head indicated she heard it anyway.
"Both the princess and I were... well, he pointed out just how poor hosts we were being. We tried to follow him and apologize, but we couldn't find him after he left the castle." Twilight admitted. "Princess Celestia had to return to Canterlot, but she asked me to pass along her apologies. Do you know where to find him?"
"I've never been to his house," Starlight admitted. "I only just met him yesterday, so I don't know exactly where he lives. But I think I know someone who does."
"You do?" Twilight asked, hope shining in her eyes. Starlight nodded. "Ok! Let me get my saddlebags, then we can go find him."
"Hold on," Starlight stopped her before she had taken two paces. "First of all, you're probably the last pony he wants to see right now." Twilight flinched at the blunt statement. "Second of all, his cabin is somewhere in the Everfree Forest; a forest that's incredibly dangerous at night. Finally, the pony who might know where he lives is probably sleeping right about now."
"But Starlight," she whined, "I have to make things right!"
"Not tonight, you're not," Starlight sternly said. "I'll go in the morning and talk to him."
"Oh! Well, if we're going to leave first thing in the morning, I better go get packed!" her mentor exclaimed.
"Twilight, you're not coming with."
"W-what?" Twilight stuttered. "Don't be silly, Starlight. How can I apologise if I don't come?"
"Look, Twilight, tonight was his best chance in nearly five years to make friends in Ponyville," she explained, exasperation creepinginto her voice. "He's already bitter enough about how ostracized he's been, but with the way you and Princess Celestia treated him tonight? I'd be surprised if he ever comes to Ponyville again, let alone accept your apologies."
"B-but..." Twilight tried to protest.
"Look, Twilight," Starlight cut in, "You bucked this up big time. You, the Princess, this whole Tartarus-damned town, you've all treated him like dirt," she spat as she opened the door to her room and stepped in.
"It makes me wonder just how committed to friendship you really are," she finished.
Twilight flinched at the stinging accusation as much as the sound of the door slamming shut. Shame once more tightened in her chest, and the pickling of her eyes spoke of welling tears. Even her flanks twitched, as if her Cutie Mark itself was trying to express it's displeasure.
'What have I done?' She asked herself as she turned and trudged away, the weight of her own failures heavy on her withers. No answers would come to her that night.
A few hours after sunset, Princess Luna walked into the small, private dining hall she occasionally used when she wanted to eat alone or with only the company of her sister. Her nightly duty, the raising of the moon, had long since been completed, and since the Night Court did not begin until a few hours after moonrise, Luna had taken the time to bathe and prepare for the night. She had come to this small dining room at the insistence of her complaining somach, however the last thing she expected was to see her sister slumped on her cushion, pushing around a mangled but only half eaten slice of cake.
"Sister!" She greated her solar counterpart warmly. "I had assumed you would have been long asleep by now. What troubles you?"
"Is it that obvious?" Celestia asked her with a weak grin. It wasn't very convincing.
"You usually leave naught but crumbs when you are presented with cake," she gently teased. "Tis only when you are truly troubled that you play with it in such a manner," she gestured to the mess of crumbs and icing on the plate.
Celestia was not one to take such japes without retort and was usually able to bring her considerable wit to bear, but this evening she merely sighed and slumped a touch further. Concerned, Luna gracefully sat herself on the cushion opposite of her sister's.
"Did something happen?" she asked. The silence held for a moment. Her sister refused to meet her gaze, instead shuffling the mushy remnants of her cake around her plate with a fork.
"Sister," Luna said firmly. Celestia reluctantly lifted her head. "What happened?"
"Twilight gave her new student a friendship assignment," she said quietly. "Starlight Glimmer was instructed to make a new friend in Ponyville and bring them to an informal dinner with me. That dinner was supposed to happen tonight."
"I take it the dinner did not go well?" Luna asked comfortingly.
"No. It never happened."
"It was cancelled?" the darker sister asked.
"No, not cancelled," Celestia clarified. "I'm afraid I had a rather... poor reaction to Starlight's guest. A... violent reaction."
"Violent?!" Luna asked in shock. "Surely her guest couldn't have been that bad."
"It... he , was a human."
"A human?" Luna questioned. "Starlight Glimmer has resorted to demon summoning?"
"No, no, nothing of the sort," Celestia replied. "The human claims to have been brought here through a portal, not a summoning, nearly five years ago when Discord escaped from his enstonement."
"Why did the Elements not erase him, then?" Luna asked.
"We are not sure," she admitted. "Perhaps because this human had not been summoned by chaos magic, but rather physically pulled through the portal?"
"In either case, it matters not," Luna declared. "I trust that you returned it from whence it came?"
"Ah... about that." Celestia ducked her head in shame once more. "I captured him and interrogated him. He claimed to mean no harm to my little ponies."
"Have you been ensorcelled?" Luna gasped. "Surely you did not fall prey to the foul beast's Aura of Seduction!"
"He claimed to have negated his Aura, and I confirmed this as true," Celestia explained. "He claimed that his Aura was not magical in nature, but rather entirely natural; a sort of natural pheremone that ponies happen to react strongly to. Furthermore, he claimed that he merely wished to coexist with my little ponies, not to seduce or to harm them in any way."
"And thee believed it's deceptions?!" Luna asked in disbelief. "Have thee taken leave of thine senses, dearest sister? If thee hast, thee surely hast gone either mad or simple!"
"Twilight Sparkle confirmed it's claims," Celestia said, raising her voice slightly to be heard over her sister's shouting.
"This cannot be!" She exclaimed. "Did thee not ensure thine precious pupil was clean from bewitchment? If this foul demon has ensnared a Princess of the Realm-"
"Twilight was not being bewitched!" Celestia interrupted her rant. "I checked. No pony was being bewitched. To the best of my knowledge, the human was telling the truth."
"But... surely..."
"Believe me, sister, I could not believe my own senses and I was there," Celestia admitted. "How many times have we been fooled by demons such as humans? How many times have we had to banish them to Tartarus?"
"Too many," Luna admitted, her eyes glazing as she recalled millenia old battles.
"I know as well as you the kind of chaos and destruction that humans are capable of." Celestia spoke with resolve. "This human... I reacted as I always have: capture, interrogate, and banish. Only this time, when I interrogated him, every word he spoke was nothing less than the truth, confirmed by my most faithful student and friend. I... I believed him."
"You let it go..." Luna said in shock. "Sister, do you realize what you have set loose on Ponyville?"
"I do," she confirmed. "But he has been living there for nearly five years, or rather, in the Everfree Forest, and coming to town on a regular basis to barter for goods."
"More like seduce ponies into giving it what it wants," Luna grumbled angrily.
"That is what surprised me the most, actually. He has supressed his Aura every time he has come to town."
"Did it not say that it's Aura was some sort of pheremone? Does that not imply that it cannot be surpressed?"
"He claims that scent-blocking soap surpresses it."
"... and just what is scent-blocking soap?" Luna asked.
"It was invented in Griffinstone almost a hundred years ago as a hunting aid. If their prey could not smell them coming, they had a greater chance of success, it would seem."
"I see." Luna considered the situation for a moment. Celestia recognized the look of contemplation on her sister's face and stayed silent.
"So, this human," she began, carefully enunciation each word, her eyebrows furled in concentration, "intentionally surpresses it's Aura, does not deceive or seduce anypony, legitimately barter for goods, and has not been involved in any violence for nearly five years?"
"That's correct."
"Then why are we only learning of its presence now?" Luna questioned. "Surely if it had naught but good intentions, your student would have befriended it long ago and brought it to our attention."
"That is the crux of the issue, sister," Celestia admitted. "It has been living peacefully near Ponyville, that is undeniable, but it seems as if it has been... ostracized by most of the village. Even my faithful student did not attempt to befriend it."
"Your student? The one you crowned the Princess of Friendship ," Luna pointedly enunciated, "did not see fit to befriend a peaceful being, demon or not?"
"That's correct."
"Surely, if it had good intentions, Princess Twilight would not have... Surely she..." Luna struggled to put to words her absolute disbelief.
"I know, Luna." Celestia commiserated. "I am... dissapointed in her actions, or lack thereof. But more than that, I am ashamed of my own."
"What do you mean?" Luna asked.
"... do you remember how many humans begged for leniency?" she asked.
"Many of them."
"Do you remember what we told the few we actually listened to?"
"That we would only consider granting them mercy if they willingly surpressed their Aura," Luna told her, mild confusion on her face. Celestia's ashamed gaze bore into her sister. Slowly, shock and horror began to spread across Luna's face as she realized what her sister was hinting at.
"By Faust..." Luna whispered.
"How many of those whom we issued that ultimatum to claimed to not know how to surpress their Aura?"
"Sister... surely..."
"How many!" Celestia shouted.
"All of them," she admitted.
"And how many did we banish to Tartarus when they couldn't comply?"
"... all of them."
After that revelation, Luna found her appetite had entirely abandoned her.
Author's Note
This one was rather short. I typed it up on my phone while at work and I haven't properly edited it yet, so if I've made some mistakes, I'll have to go back and fix them later.
The scene between Celestia and Luna was unplanned, but it came to mind nearly fully formed and practically wrote itself. I had originally planned to have Starlight visit Henry at his cabin this chapter, but I felt that, as short as it is, it would lessen the emotional impact of Celestia and Luna's past experiences with humans. So I decided to post it as-is.
Author's Note
Two quick notes;
Equinologists are the pony equivalent to Anthropologists.
Ostrohippicus are the equivalent to Australopithecus.
The first scene here came to me after I had already posted the previous chapter. It fits better there, but I didn't want to go back and add it to an already posted chapter. So, I'll just leave this here.
Enjoy!
The Cabin in the Woods
A viscous drizzle of caramel slowly dripped into the copper cauldron, leaving appetizing swirls in a dazzling pattern. Bon Bon carefully gripped the large ladle in one hoof, gently tipping it so that the warm caramel poured at a steady rate. The caramel swirls contrasted beautifully against the already well mixed vanilla and cream, intersecting with the already present chocolate and peanut butter swirls. 'I can't wait until it's frozen,' she thought to herself. Her mouth was already watering at the thought.
Once the last of the caramel had been poured into the cauldron, she reached for a small bowl of crushed chocolate-covered peanuts, but the gentle chiming of the bell above her store's front door interrupted her.
"Be there in a minute!" she called as sweetly as she could. As she pulled off her apron, she glanced at the clock hanging high above the wall. 'It's already 8pm,' she noted. 'Who could be coming in at this time of the night?'
She caught sight of her customer as she pushed open the swinging kitchen doors and groaned lightly to herself. 'Of course it had to be Henry,' she mentally complained. The sex demon was dressed nicer than usual, in a dark blue button up shirt and black pants rather than the horrid animal skins he usually wore. They had to have been self made, she noted, as the stitching work was well below the kind of work Rarity, as the only seamstress or tailor in town, would allow to be sold. The clothes were creased and rumpled in odd patterns and loosely hung off of his form. It seemed absurd that such a large being could wear anything that fit loosely.
Still, the small part of her that actually cared for the sex demon noted that he was slumped over more than usual. Usually he sat as upright as he could in the too-small bar stool, but tonight he rested his elbows on the counter, his hands were folded, and his head bowed. He didn't even look up as she trotted closer.
"Hey," she said as monotonously as she could. "You know I'm gonna be closing up soon, don't you?"
"Yeah, I know," he replied. Even his voice sounded downcast, none of the sarcastic bite she was used to was present.
"... you here for something or are you just gonna mope about," she asked him. Given the way he mildly flinched, Bon Bon cringed a bit inside. Their usual banter and barbs, while initially annoying, had kinda grown on her. He was usually terribly witty, and most of their exchanges left her feeling as if she'd lost.
"I don't care, surprise me." he sighed. "Just as long as it doesn't have milk products."
"Yeah, sure," she replied. She left him to mope and set to work throwing together something for him to enjoy. She started with iced coffee, mixed in some chocolate, a touch of mint syrup, and sprinkled in some cinnamon and sugar. He barely reacted when she placed the drink in front of him, only glancing at it and sighing.
"Look, you gonna drink that?" she asked him a few moments later. He sighed, picked it up, and took a sip out of the straw Bon Bon had put in it.
"It's good," he told her with the slightest of grins.
"It better be," she snarked. "It's only my special talent. Not that you'd know anything about those."
The tiny grin immediately faded, replaced by a scowl.
'Oh no,' Bon Bon thought with a sinking feeling. 'Usually he just fires back. Something must really be bothering him.'
The part of her that liked Henry and valued the mutual jibes and constant sniping they always had wanted to speak up and ask him what was wrong. The other part of her tried to ignore the impulse. Indecision warred within her, torn as she was between her feelings. Usually, she'd just retreat into playful insults, but with as poor of a mood as he was in, she couldn't bring herself to do that.
"You know, I've known for a long time just why you hate me," Henry told her. His head was bowed once more and his hands cradled the iced coffee as he stared into the bottom of the glass as if it held the secrets to the universe.
"I- I-" Bon Bon stuttered in shock. "I don't hate you," she managed to stammer.
"Sure you do," he said with a grimace. "Just like every other pony in this town, you've done your best to make me feel as unwelcome as possible without resorting to physical violence."
Bon Bon's eyes widened with shock. 'He... he really believes that? He doesn't know I was just teasing him this whole time?'
"I had hoped at one point that I could bring you around, you know," he admitted. His voice was faint, even to her sensitive ears. "I figured that if you got to know me, you'd soften up a bit."
Henry paused and took a deep pull from the straw. Bon Bon tried to speak up, but it was like something was blocking her throat and she couldn't force the words out. Old instincts, as if from another life (and technically it was; she wasn't Sweetie Drops anymore) smoothed out her face into a blank, inscrutable mask.
"But I guess if I couldn't get the Princess of Friendship to come around, making friends with a normal pony would be impossible. So, I guess I just wanted to stop by to tell you that... I give up."
He took another drink, almost finishing off the comically small glass compared to his bulk. "I want to make it clear to you that I have no romantic intentions towards Lyra. I never have, and I never will," he told her as seriously as he could. "I know you've been in love with her for as long as I've known you two."
"W-w-what?" Bon Bon tried to protest. 'How does he know? How could he know?'
"I've seen the way you look at her when she isn't watching. I've seen the heartbreak in your eyes every time she flirts with me. It doesn't take a genius to figure it out," he went on. "I've known since before you taught me Equestrian. I'd hoped that you'd see me turning her down and understand that I wasn't trying to steal her away from you or anything, but you've been just as antagonistic towards me as you always were."
He sighed once more, finished off the iced coffee, stood up, and started rooting through the pockets of his pants. Bon Bon stared in shock, unable to bring up the courage to say anything.
"I know why Lyra's so insistent on pursuing me too. She's the same way, you know," he pointed out. "I'm the only male she's ever felt attracted to, but she's been raised to believe homosexuality is wrong, so she sees me as her best hope of having any kind of heterosexual relationship."
He pulled a small pouch out of his pocket and started fiddling with it as he spoke.
"I've known for a while how uncomfortable my Aura made you too," he continued. "And I know that, between questioning your own sexuality and your hurt over Lyra that you've been subtly trying to drive me away for years. I know that both you and Lyra are only attracted to me because of my Aura. I've been trying to get her to notice you for a long time, but she's so hung up on a 'normal' hetero relationship that she won't see it. So, I give up."
He placed the small pouch on the bar top. It clinked brightly, incongruous with the mood in the room.
"I won't come hang around anymore. You'll have her all to yourself." He pointed at the small pouch. "That's for housing me all those years ago. Goodbye, Bon Bon."
In a daze, Bon Bon carefully picked up the pouch and untied the drawstring. A dozen little gold nuggets shone brightly in the light, glittering beautifully. Her already tight throat clenched further and a heavy weight gripped her heart. She opened her mouth to call out to him as he walked towards the door, but all that came out was a slight squeak. Henry opened the door, paused for a moment, looked over his shoulder, and locked eyes with her.
The normally bright, shining blue of his eyes seemed dull and lifeless. They looked wrong. 'This is all wrong,' she thought to herself. He sighed once more and stepped out into the growing dark of the night.
"W-wait," she tried to say, but her words were so faint that they were lost in the chiming of the door bell as the door closed. She stood there in silence as she tried to process just what had happened. Henry was... had been her friend. Now he was gone. The small, selfish part of her that should have been rejoicing at having Lyra all to herself was drowned out by the part of her that had liked having him visit.
"You dummy," she muttered. "You big, stupid dummy."
Anger welled up within her, whether at him or at herself, she wasn't sure. Maybe both. With a scream of rage, she tossed the bag of gold at the door he had left through. It clanked and clattered as it bounced off and fell to the floor. The tears started pooling as her eyes prickled and her nose burned.
"Fine," she muttered angrily. "You wanna be like that, I don't care. Go off and live in your stupid forests. Less trouble for me."
If only she could bring herself to believe her own words.
The next morning, once Starlight had bathed and prepared for the day, she came down to the ground floor of the castle and entered the kitchen. Twilight was waiting for her there, a cup of strong-smelling coffee held in her magic in front of her. Spike was humming happily to himself in front of the stove, wearing his usual frilly pink apron and deftly flipping pancakes. A stack of them were already sitting on a plate in the middle of the table.
"Morning Twilight, morning Spike!" she called cheerfully as she sat down at the table.
"Good morning, Starlight," Spike called over his shoulder as he added another pancake to the second stack on the plate next to him.
"G'morn'n" Twilight mumbled before she took a sip from her mug. Starlight tried not to stare at her mentor. She had deep, dark bags under her red-rimmed eyes, and her normally impeccably combed mane was a bird's nest. Starlight busied herself with gathering some pancakes onto her plate, drenching them in syrup, and topping them off with whipped cream and fresh sliced strawberries.
"Mmm!" she voiced when she took her first bite. "These are really good, Spike!" she complimented the baby dragon after she had swallowed.
"Thanks!" He called, before muttering "At least somepony appreciates my cooking," as he frowned at Twilight.
Eventually, Spike finished up cooking and sat at his own place at the table. By the time Starlight had finished her stack, Twilight had almost finished her cup of coffee and looked much more awake and aware than before.
"So," Twilight began as Starlight floated her plate and silverware over to the sink. "Are you still going to go visit your human friend today?"
"I am," she said, a little more subdued than earlier.
"Good!" Twilight continued. "I took the liberty of packing your saddlebags for you."
Starlight's saddlebags floated in from the doorway to the rest of the castle. Twilight held them aloft in her magic and opened them up.
"I wasn't sure how deep into the forest you had to go, so I prepared you for anything!" she continued as she lifted objects out of them one by one. "I've got notebooks, quills, inkwells, a first aid kit, extra bandages, a forestry survival guide, hardtack, trail mix-"
"I think I get the picture," Starlight interrupted her.
"Oh. Right," Twilight grinned sheepishly. She repacked the bags and held them out of her students. Starlight barely resisted rolling her eyes, but she took the bags and settled them comfortably across her back.
"Well, I guess I'll be off," Starlight said awkwardly. Something about the way Twilight was smiling at her wasn't quite right. "I'm not sure when I'll be back, but it'll probably be late."
"Ok!" she said, perhaps a little too cheerfully. "Stay safe!"
"Uh... sure thing. See you later."
Twilight watched her student walk out of the kitchen and had to resist rubbing her hooves together. 'She didn't notice!' she mentally celebrated. 'Step one: check!'
Starlight stood outside Bon Bon's Bon Bons, blinking owlishly at the sign on the front door that very clearly read 'closed'. She looked around at all the ponies out and about, running the morning's errands. The sun was already well above the horizon and it had to be at least nine in the morning. All the other shops were open. 'So why isn't hers?' she asked herself.
Still, she firmed her resolve and knocked loudly. She stood there awkwardly for a few minutes watching the crowds go about their business. She had to admit, Ponyville was a lot more lively than her old village had ever been. She admitted that it was mostly her own fault; ponies without cutie marks trying to run shops didn't work very well, and what little enthusiasm her former villagers had shown had been forced. 'Still,' she consoled herself, 'that's why I'm here, learning about friendship from Twilight. I'm turning over a new leaf.'
Starlight heard the sound of a deadbolt unlatching and quickly turned back to the door.
"Oh, Starlight!" Lyra exclaimed when she saw who was waiting on the stoop. "I didn't expect you to come by this morning."
"Hey, Lyra." Starlight greeted her. "I wasn't aware you guys were closed today."
"Well, we weren't supposed to be, but Bon Bon won't come out of her room. She says she's sick and she does sound all stuffed up."
"Oh. I'm sorry to hear that," the pale lavender unicorn commiserated. "I hope she feels better soon."
"Me too," Lyra agreed.
"Anyway, I was hoping I could talk to you," Starlight continued.
"About what?"
"I was wondering if you knew where Henry lived."
"Oh. Yeah, I do." Lyra paused and looked back inside. "I'd offer to show you the way, but... well, I really don't want to leave Bon Bon home alone while she's sick."
Starlight's face fell in disappointment.
"But, I can give you directions!" Lyra continued.
"Oh, you can? Excellent!" Starlight pulled a notebook, quill, and inkwell from her saddlebags, silently thanking her mentor for packing for her, and readied herself to take notes.
"Ok, so, start heading south on Whispering Way, past the Town Hall, then take a left on Royal Road. Past Fluttershy's cottage, take a right on the old trail. That trail leads towards Zecora's cottage. A few miles in, you'll come to a fork in the road. The left fork will take you to Zecora's cottage, but you want to go right. After a mile or so, just past the ford in the river, there's another fork at an old burnt out tree. Take a left here and follow it for another few miles. It'll take you right to Henry's cabin." Lyra paused and watched Starlight rapidly writing everything down. "You get all that?"
"Yeah... yeah, I think so." Starlight said. "Thanks for the directions, Lyra."
"You're welcome!"
'Stupid forest,' Starlight complained to herself and she yanked a hoof out of the vines trying to tangle them. The path was old and overgrown, with only a very narrow bare patch to follow. 'It's more like a game trail than a proper path,'
Despite nature trying to trip her up, Starlight had followed the directions Lyra had given her to the letter, and she knew she was close to her goal. The woods around her were dense, and the few breaks in the canopy allowed the undergrowth to flourish. Only the smallest patches of the sky were visible above her, but Starlight didn't mind. The shade felt wonderfully cool in the hot summer they were having.
Thwip... thunk.
The pale purple pony jumped a bit at the sound. It had been faint, but distinctly different from the normal ambient noise of a dense forest. A few dozen paces ahead, the forest started to thin out a bit. The path gradually became more worn, bracketed not by trees but only by the conical stumps left behind when a tree is chopped down with an axe.
Thwip... thunk.
As she approached the clearing, Starlight caught her first glimpse of Henry's cabin. 'Cabin? More like woodland mansion!' she thought to herself.
Indeed, the cabin was two stories tall. The roof was shingled with wooden slats overlapping each other in such a way as to sluice rainfall off the sides. The front of the cabin was facing her, judging by the wooden porch and the overhang that protected it from the sun and the rain. The walls of the cabin were expertly fitted logs with some sort of adobe sealing the places where two logs touched. An extraordinarily tall and wide chimney towered out of the far side of the cabin, standing nearly as tall as the trees at the edge of the clearing. A small wooden mini-roof covered the extra wide opening at the top. The windows were open and didn't seem to have any glass in them, but the shutters hanging from the window frames looked solid enough to withstand a wild storm.
A large cistern, almost as tall as the edge of the roof, stood near one corner of the cottage, a wooden sort-of aqueduct draining into it. About a hundred paces away from the cottage, at the base of the small rise the cottage was built on, a large stream pushed a waterwheel that lifted small buckets from the stream and dumped the water they held into the elevated aqueduct.
A wooden sluice jutted from the side and wound its way over a garden that was large enough to qualify as a small field. Small offshoots from the sluice hovered over the neatly planted rows of various vegetables, ranging from carrots to cucumbers, and leaked small trickles of water onto the crops.
A pair of solid cellar doors jutted out from the low stone foundation that ran around the base of the cabin. Starlight assumed it was some sort of root cellar, for storing the produce the large garden grew.
Thwip... thunk.
'What in the world is that sound?' Starlight asked herself. Indeed, it was louder now than it had been as she approached the cabin. She skirted the edge of the garden and rounded the corner of the cabin, and discovered what it was.
Henry stood near the back of the cabin, wearing nothing except some sort of animal skin trousers. Starlight paused, her nose filled with a musky, salty scent, mesmerized by the way her human friend's muscles rippled and flexed under his skin as he pulled the strangely shaped bow taut. Sweat glistened in the sunlight, standing out sharply from his tanned skin, as he aimed an arrow towards a well-used wooden target at least a hundred paces away at the edge of the clearing opposite the direction Starlight had come.
Thwip... thunk.
The arrow flew true, faster than Starlight had ever seen an arrow shot from a bow, and sank deeply just off center of the target, where it joined another half-dozen arrows. Henry grunted, sounding displeased, and grabbed another arrow from the quiver at his hip. He nocked it and drew once more. Starlight was as mesmerized by the strange pulley system attached to the tip of each arm of the bow as she was by the way Henry's muscles flexed. The pulleys rotated up and out as he drew the string taut, and she wondered just what they were for.
She took another deep breath through her nose. The musky scent was becoming... better, somehow. 'I had no idea he smelled this good,' she thought to herself as she smiled an almost dreamy smile. She looked him over once more, her pussy twitching as she did. 'Or looked this good under his clothes, either.'
Thwip... thunk.
The arrow embedded itself perfectly in the center of the target, and Henry pumped his fist and half-whispered "Yes!" in celebration. Starlight felt her nethers twitch once more as he flexed his arm. A streak of dampness leaked down her inner thighs and she shivered slightly in arousal.
"H-hey, Henry," she called breathlessly.
Henry started and whipped around, eyes wide. He caught once glance at her and the look on her face, and groaned softly to himself.
"Hey, Starlight," he sighed, resignedly.
"So..." she drew the word out as she strutted closer to him. His scent became stronger with every step, and her nethers became wetter with every breath. "This is where you live, huh?"
"Yeah..." he said carefully. "I built it myself."
"I can tell," she crooned as she looked up and down his well muscled form once more. Maybe those animal skin trousers weren't so ugly after all, not with how tightly they were stretched across his muscled legs.
"So, what brings you all this way?" he asked her, a little nervousness creeping into his voice.
"Oh, you know," Starlight said with a husky voice and reached up to place a hoof on his thigh, just barely avoiding his groin. "Just wanted to catch up with you, see how you were doing after last night."
"I'm fine," he said as he gently removed her hoof. "Though I appreciate you coming to check on me."
"You know, you don't have to pretend," Starlight insisted, simpering slightly. "Twilight told me all about it, about how much of a cunt she and the princess were to you." She reared up and placed both of her forehooves right on his astonishingly hard pecs. She licked her lips in anticipation.
"But don't you worry," she continued. "I'll make everything better."
"Oh, Starlight," he said with a low, husky voice. "I'm so glad to hear you say that."
Her heart skipped a beat, even as her pussy clenched and winked in anticipation.
"But I've been working outside all day," he continued, regret lacing his voice. "I wouldn't want to... let you make it up to me... while I'm all sweaty and dirty."
"Oh, I don't mind," she smirked. She leaned in and ran her tongue up his neck to his ear. The salt of his sweat was delicious, and she moaned both from arousal and appreciation of how he tasted.
"I'm sure you don't," he continued. He reached an arm up and gently stroked her mane. "But if you're going to properly apologize on behalf of the princesses, I'd rather do it after a bath, you know?"
"Well... I guess I can wait," she said in disappointment. She dropped down to all fours and turned, whipping her tail against the side of his thighs as she did. "Just don't keep me waiting too long!"
"I won't, I promise." Henry winked at her, sending another shiver down her spine. "Here, why don't you wait on the porch? I'll bring you something to drink while I bathe."
Starlight continuously rubbed her side against her human's leg as he led her onto the porch. He led her to a woven wicker oval chair with a large, overstuffed cushion on it and gestured for her to sit down. Starlight moaned lightly to herself as she did so, finally off her hooves after spending most of the morning walking. Despite her relief, she continued to fidget in place while she waited for Henry to come back. A few moments later, he did so with a small, clay cup in his hands. He placed it down on the small wooden stand next to the chair.
"Here," he said. "It's watermelon-blueberry juice. I hope you like it."
"I'm sure I will," she told him with a wink. As Henry took off towards the stream with a small bundle of clothes held in one hand, Starlight sipped the juice and was surprised. It was sweet and tart, and cold! She wondered how in the world he kept it cold out here. 'Maybe he has a magic refrigerator?'
She mulled over the possibilities in her head while she waited for her human to come back, pondering the logistics of a creature with no magic using a magic powered appliance. The conclusion she reached was that he'd have to buy magic batteries if he did, or it was some kind of machine he'd built that didn't use magic.
About fifteen minutes later, Henry, now fully dressed in a white cotton shirt and pants, stepped back on the porch. Starlight breathed deep, trying to get more of his scent. It was... not there? She tilted her head to the side in confusion. What had happened to it?
"Starlight, do you know a lot about magic?" Henry asked her in a smooth, sexy voice.
"Oh, yes, tons!" she replied eagerly.
"Do you know Misty Mirage's Mind Maximizer ?" When she nodded, he asked, "Could you cast it on yourself?"
"Easy enough," Starlight commented. Her horn glowed and the cool rush produced by the spell washed though her skull. She felt her thoughts sharpen and her eyes focus on Henry's face, rather than his gorgeous body.
"Well done!" he complimented her, a touch patronizingly in her opinion. "Now, can you do Deep Diver's Breathing Bubble ?"
"No problem," she smirked. A flash of magic later and her head was surrounded with a translucent bubble, looking a bit like a soap bubble, used as a breathing aid by deep sea divers.
"Good job, Starlight," Henry grinned at her. "Now, I need you to keep those spells up for a while. You'll be fine after twenty minutes or so."
"Twenty minutes? I feel fine now ," Starlight said with a sexy grin.
"I know you do, Starlight," he continued. "Do you remember when I told you about my Aura?"
"Of course I do, silly," she cooed.
"Well, you stopped by unexpectedly today, so I hadn't used my scent-suppressing soap," he explained. "So when you walked up, you got a big whiff of my pheromones."
"I don't see what's so bad about that," Starlight objected.
"It made you feel like you were in estrus," Henry continued. "It puts you in a highly aroused and highly suggestive state. Even if I had been the most disgusting, revolting thing you'd seen in your whole life, you would have wanted to sleep with me."
"Hmm, doesn't sound like a big deal to me."
"Well, if you had woken up the next morning and you weren't getting a big whiff of my 'Aura', you'd be disgusted with yourself."
"Aww, c'mon, Henry, it wouldn't be that bad," she cajoled. "Besides, with muscles like yours, you don't need some silly 'Aura' to seduce m- ponies." She looked over his (unfortunately) hidden body before meeting his eyes and winking. She was pleased to see a light blush spread across his cheeks.
"You say that now," he warned her, "but you're still being affected. Once I'm sure you're not being influenced by my pheromones, I might believe you when you say that."
"Well, we'll just have to wait, then, won't we?" she smirked.
"Yeah, I guess we do," he rolled his eyes at her. A moment of awkward silence followed, broken only by the scratching of the wicker chair every time Starlight fidgeted in her seat.
"You want something to snack on?" Henry asked her after another minute or two.
"I'd rather you be eating me," she replied saucily, "but I wouldn't say no to a sandwich."
"S-sure, I'll get... pfft, right on that," Henry stifled his laughter as best as he could as he stood and entered the cabin.
Starlight didn't notice a thing, save for how red his face was as he left. So she sat there, inordinately pleased with herself, looking like a cat that had gotten the cream.
When several minutes had passed and Henry hadn't come out of the cabin, Starlight got curious. 'Just what is taking him so long?' she asked herself as she stepped out of the amazingly comfortable chair, bubble still around her head, and entered through the front door.
The first thing that struck her was that there were a lot of animal skins. The second is that all of the furniture was surprisingly well made out of rough, rustic looking logs that had been varnished, and nearly all of them had some kind of animal skin upholstery. A high backed chair even had brass tack trimming on the ends of the foreleg rests. It rested next to a large, oval flat topped coffee table that sat in front of a three seat couch. A bookshelf filled the wall behind the couch, stuffed almost to overflowing with books, most looking well used. A manticore skin rug sat underneath the coffee table, right where a pony could have rested their legs on the floor, if they were as large as Henry's.
A few shelves with various knick knacks lined the rest of the walls, but Starlight barely paid any attention to the bric-a-brac. An open doorway led to a short hallway, with two doors on the left and one on the right, and the end of which opened up into what must have been a kitchen. Starlight followed the sounds Henry was making.
The kitchen had a large stone stove above a truly humongous fireplace that looked more in place in the great hall of an old castle rather than in a cabin in the woods, no matter how large the cabin was, though Starlight noted that the fireplace wasn't currently lit. In fact, the area above the stone stove angled up and back to, apparently, capture the smoke and guide it up the chimney while allowing the fire to light the underside of a pair of burners, modeled after the gas burning stoves Starlight was familiar with.
The island in the middle of the kitchen appeared to have cabinets on all sides, and the counter seemed to have been formed from a smooth, solid block of some kind of dark slate. Another set of cabinets was suspended from the ceiling above the island, and a number of cast iron and bronze pots, pans, and skillets hung from hooks on it's underside. The wall next to where she was standing had a set of deep shelves that were covered by some kind of clay jars that, from a cursory glance, had clay lids sealed on with some kind of wax. A second shelf had assortments of clay bowls filled with various powdered spices and herbs, and wicker baskets with fresh produce of some kind. A set of stairs in the corner led down, presumably, into the cellar, while above them a second set led up to the second floor.
'This is... cosy,' she thought to herself, 'if a little too rustic for my tastes.'
Henry stood at the central island with a large, sharp knife in his hand, making slices from some kind of small cheese wheel. From where she stood, it looked and smelled like a particularly sharp cheddar, which was one of her favorites.
"I'm almost done, Starlight," he told her without looking up as he deftly cut the cheese into a pair of perfect slices.
"What're you making?" she asked.
"For you, I'm making a cheddar, tomato, cucumber, and fresh spinach leaf sandwich with a little mayonaise and spiced olive oil and vinegar as dressing." He looked at her and winked. "I'm sure you'll approve."
"Sounds delicious!" She looked around the kitchen with a mild frown and asked, "Though, I don't suppose you have any daisies, do you?"
"I'm afraid not," he replied. "I can't eat daisies."
"Drat." She sniffed, and was only mildly disappointed that she couldn't smell his scent anymore. "What are you making yourself?" She asked.
"Same thing, but with {}salami{} on it."
"Uh... what's slammi?"
"Um... well, it's a form of preserved meat," he told her uncomfortably.
"Oh. Yeah, I'll pass," she replied, looking a little green.
"You know," he started to say as he folded the two halves of the sandwiches together and put them on a pair of clay plates, "you ponies are remarkably similar to a species we have back home."
"Oh? You have ponies there, too?"
"Er, not exactly," he demurred. "They most closely resemble the creatures your equinologists claim to be you ponies' earliest ancestors, the ostrohippicus, but taller and without your hoof magic."
"... you have big, dumb, cave ponies?" she asked with a raised eyebrow.
"Something like that," he waved a hand. "The creatures we have, we call them {}horses{} by the way, are mostly herbivorous, but are technically classified as opportunistic omnivores. It's not unheard of for a feral {}horse{} to scavenge off of recently dead animals, or to eat ground-nesting birds and their eggs. Can you ponies do the same?"
"Ick. Technically yes, and before the Unification, pegasi regularly ate fish, mostly because when they drain lakes and ponds for their cloud cities' water reserves, they'd inevitably suck up fish with it. And pretty much all ponies eat eggs in some form or another, mostly in baking," she explained. "But while we can technically eat meat, it's very uncommon except as certain rare delicacies, and even then it's usually fish, if anything."
"Hmm. Makes sense," Henry said. "Well, I make some pretty good meat products, so if you're ever curious..."
Starlight clenched her eyes shut and stuck out her tongue in disgust, causing Henry to trail off and chuckle at her disgust. He held the plate with her sandwich out to her.
"Here you go."
"Thanks," she said as she took it in her magic, "but I'm not sure how hungry I am after that."
This, of course, only caused him to chuckle once more.
"Here, I'll grab some more juice," he waved her back towards the porch, "I'll come out and eat with you in a second."
"Sure," Starlight responded before she walked back out to that incredibly comfortable woven wicker chair. 'I'll have to get me one of these,' she thought to herself as she hopped back on. Barely a minute later, Henry walked out with a clay pitcher, a second cup, and his plate with his sandwich on it. He refilled her cup, filled his own, and sat in another chair. Starlight took a bite out of her sandwich, blinked in surprise, and moaned in pleasure from the taste.
The creamy, tangy mayonnaise blended well with the olive oil and vinegar, producing a tangy and mildly sour flavor that was only made better by what she identified as oregano, basil, bay, and rosemary adding an herbal flavor to the sauce. The tomatos were also sour, but incredibly juicy, and their acidity was perfectly offset by the fresh, crisp cucumber. The sharp, flavorful cheddar and fluffy white bread brought the whole thing together into one of the most delicious sandwiches she'd ever had. 'Hay, it doesn't even need any daisy,' she thought to herself as she chewed.
The slightly sour and sweet fruit juice washed it down perfectly, and despite the heat of the day, a gentle breeze ruffled her fur and mane, while the shade of the porch kept her cool. In this perfect, round cushioned wicker chair, it was incredibly relaxing. 'It's easy to forget that we're in the middle of the Everfree,' she noted in contentment.
The two ate their sandwiches mostly in silence, enjoying the beautiful day. The birds were singing, the breeze was rustling the leaves, and the gentle burbling of the water running in the wooden aqueduct created a peaceful ambience that neither was eager to break. As Starlight's eyes wandered, she noted Henry's bow was leaned up against the railing around the porch, just next to the steps. Noting the strange pulley system and the fact that the bow appeared to have three strings, she was curious about the device.
"Henry," she asked. "Why does your bow have those pulleys and multiple strings?"
Henry took a moment to finish chewing before washing it down with a gulp of juice.
"That's a compound bow," he started. "It's a refinement of bow technology, invented a number of decades ago. Granted, the compound bows I'm used to are made of different materials than wood, usually steel or {}carbon fiber{}, and sometimes aluminium."
"Um, what does it do?" she asked.
"It shoots arrows," he deadpanned. She rolled her eyes.
"You know what I mean," she chided him.
"Well, the pulleys on the arms of the bow generate a mechanical advantage, allowing the user to use less force to keep the bow fully drawn. With stiffer arms than a usual bow and the mechanical action of the pulleys, it's able to sustain a higher accelleration over the full draw length compared to traditional bows, which has diminishing acceleration as the bow's arms relax," he explained. He even picked up the bow and showed her how it was drawn and held, highlighting the action of the pulleys. "This means that the arrow leaves the bow at a higher speed and with a higher force, allowing it to hit harder and fly farther than a traditional bow with a similar draw weight."
"Fascinating!" she marvelled. "I know the EUP Guard train with crossbows in addition to their spears sometimes. Do you think that this technology could be used to improve crossbows?"
"Definitely," he stated, "though if the Guard wants better long range weapons, mechanical propulsion isn't the best route."
"Oh?"
"Yes. Your guards already use rudimentary cannons. It's possible to make weapons that are, for all intents and purposes, very small cannons that could be fired by a single pony, much the same way that a crossbow is similar to a ballista."
"... that's... brilliant." Starlight blinked. "Why hasn't anyone thought of that before?"
"Likely because of the near millennia of peace Equestria has enjoyed; you haven't needed them."
"True enough. Still, if war does come to Equestria, I'd rather have the most technologically advanced weapons we have in the hooves of the guard than in the claws of our enemies."
"It's likely not something you'll have to worry about in your lifetime," he noted.
"Yeah... probably not."
"Still, it might be a good idea to present the idea to the guard so that working models could be slowly developed, just in case," he pointed out.
"Ah, a case of 'better to have it and not need it than to need it and not have it'?"
"Exactly," he grinned at her.
"So, what other incredible inventions do you know about?"
"Oh, all kinds. Everything from basic {}transistors{}, which are a better version of vacuum tubes, to internal combustion engines, to heavier-than-air flying machines," he (slightly) bragged.
"Wait wait wait," Starlight interrupted, "you know how to make heavier-than-air flying machines?"
"Oh, come on, Starlight," he rolled his eyes, "A third of your population are heavier than air flying creatures. You can't possibly tell me that you don't believe it's possible."
"Pegasi use magic to enable their flight," Starlight explained. "If you could get a pegasus into magical suppression shackles, they couldn't fly."
"They make themselves lighter with magic," he conceded, "but not lighter than air. They still get their lift from the aerodynamic shape of their wings."
"What about when they're gliding and not flapping down?" she challenged.
"Ugh, look, it's like this," he held a hand out to his side, his thumb towards her. "It's all about surface area," he explained. "As air is split by the wing, the air that travels along the top of the wing has a longer distance to travel than the air passing underneath. Because the air has farther to go on top, it expands, creating a lower air pressure above the wing than below the wing. The difference in air pressure-"
"Causes a net force upwards!" Starlight exclaimed in astonishment.
"Exactly!" Henry replied.
"How in the world did you figure that out?" she asked.
"Surprisingly, it's because my people didn't have any way to control weather, so we developed ways to predict it."
"What does predicting weather have to do with flight?" she questioned him.
"Well, you know what a barometer is, right?"
"Sure, it measures air pressure."
"Right," he acknowledged. "Humans noticed that low pressure zones tended to be warmer and high pressure zones tended to be colder, but we also noticed that high pressure zones tended to flow into low pressure zones. In other words, in nature things tend to equalize; high pressure flows into low pressure until both are equal. If you have a barrier in the way, like a wing or a steam piston, the higher pressure area pushes on the lower pressure area. With a specially shaped fixed wing, we can manipulate the flow of air to create a pressure differential."
"Ok, I get how studying air pressure could lead to flight, but what does high pressure zones and low pressure zones have to do with weather?"
"High pressure zones are usually cooler and drier, so when a low pressure zone meets a high pressure zone, the warm moist air mixes with the cool, dry air. Since cooler air can hold less evaporated water than warmer air, the extra water condenses into clouds and then falls as rain," he lectured. "If your pegasi weather teams studied how the weather of the Everfree works, you'd notice it works along these same lines; the wild storms that occasionally pour out of the Everfree are caused by cool, dry, high pressure air flowing out of the Everfree into the warmer, wetter air over Ponyville. The collision of these two zones produces lines of storms, and the larger the difference in heat and pressure between the two, the more powerful the storm."
Starlight was silent for a moment as she thought through the argument. She couldn't refute the principles states; after all, the pegasi had long-since established the Law of Thermodynamics.
"Is there anything you don't know?" she asked him while shaking her head.
"Well, I don't know a whole lot about magic," he laughed lightly, "but I do spend a fair bit of my free time reading," he motioned to the parlor, presumably to the bookshelves Starlight had seen in there earlier.
"I swear, it's practically criminal that you have to live out here," she said while shaking her head.
"Well, I'm glad that I have at least one pony who appreciates me," he half-smiled and half-grimaced.
"Oh, but what about Lyra and Bon Bon?" Starlight asked.
"Lyra just wants to get in my pants and Bon Bon's made it clear how much she doesn't want me around," he complained with a hint of bitterness. "Neither of them are particularly stimulating intellectuals, and they've long since gotten tired of my lectures."
"Well, you don't have to worry about that with me," Starlight said. "I enjoy learning new things, and a lot of your lectures are well articulated and well reasoned."
"Well, thanks. I appreciate the compliment," he replied. "Though, I have to ask, are you feeling any better?"
"Uh, what?" Starlight was confused by his apparent non-sequitur.
"The Aura," he explained.
"Oh, that." Starlight considered her own condition. She wasn't feeling particularly aroused anymore, and thank Celestia her mini-estrus was over. 'But you've gotta admit,' a part of her whispered in the back of her mind, 'he did look really good without his shirt on.'
"I think the worst is past me," she informed him as she desperately fought down a blush. Henry noted that she wasn't making eye contact with him anymore, but he assumed it was out of embarrassment over her previous actions.
"Well, in the future, if you decide to visit and I haven't had the chance to use the scent-suppressing soap, you can use the Mind Maximizer and the Breathing Bubble to negate the effects. Not entirely, mind you," he pointed out, "but enough that you should be able to function normally."
"I'll keep that in mind," she told him. That small, rebellious part of her, however, whispered temptations into her mind. 'You could teleport back here anytime you want,' it told her. 'You could get a whiff of that delectable scent any time you want. You know you loved the way it made you feel...'
"So!" Starlight said perhaps a touch too loudly as she tried to ignore the voice. "How about a tour of your... um, cabin?"
"Alright," Henry said before he stood up. "I know it's not much, but I built it all by hand, so I'm kinda proud of it."
Starlight followed along, the dirty dishes held in her magic, listening to Henry explain exactly how he had built his home.
Meanwhile, Twilight cast a spell on the Cutie Map, which had been zoomed in to show the Everfree Forest. A bright purple spark of magic floated over the map and gently came to rest just a few miles north of the ruins of the Castle of the Two Sisters.
'Perfect,' she thought to herself. 'Starlight hasn't moved from that general area in over an hour. That must be where her human friend lives.'
She leaned back on her hind legs and clopped her forehooves together in excitement. 'I knew it was a good idea to put a tracking spell on Starlight's saddlebags!' she thought to herself in excitement.
"Spike! Spike!? Spiiiiike!" she called out.
"Coming, Twilight," she heard her number one assistant call out from down the hall. Twilight waited impatiently for him to get to her, once more casting the tracking spell just to confirm the location.
"I'm here, Twilight," Spike panted as he jogged into the throne room. "What d'ya need?"
"Spike, take a letter!" she ordered him as she floated a scroll, quill, and inkwell over to him. Spike grabbed the floating objects and quickly got ready. It was just like old times.
"Ready!" he called out.
"Dear Princess Celestia," Twilight dictated. "After our failure to find Starlight's guest last night, I asked Starlight if she knew where he lived so that we could visit him in person. Starlight admitted that she wasn't aware of the exact location of his domicile, only that it was somewhere in the Everfree Forest, but she claimed she knew somepony who had been there before. When I insisted on travelling there myself, Starlight rebuffed me and said she would go alone to gauge his reaction. I was unsatisfied with that plan, so I covertly placed a tracking spell on her saddlebags. That tracking spell has allowed me to pinpoint exactly where her guest likely resides, and furthermore, it can be used as a teleportation beacon. I believe that now is an excellent time to offer our apologies in person. If you wish to accompany me, you can teleport to my castle and we can go together. If you'd rather not, please send word through Spike, and I'll go alone. Your faithful student and friend, Twilight Sparkle."
Twilight paused for a moment as Spike finished furiously writing the letter. "... Twilight... Sparkle. All done!" he said proudly.
"Good," Twilight congratulated him. "Go ahead and send it, please."
Spike held the letter aloft and breathed his special dragon fire on it. The cloud of smoke and ash quickly flew out the door and down the hall, on it's way to the Princess.
"And that's that," Twilight muttered to herself, grinning slightly neurotically. "Spike, let me know the instant you get a reply, ok?"
"Sure thing, Twilight."
'I am a good pony,' Twilight thought to herself. 'I am the Princess of Friendship. I'll make him see what a good friend I can be, I promise! Cross my heart, hope to fly, stick a cupcake in my eye!'
Pinkie Pie paused in the middle of mixing up a cake. She paused. Her eyebrow twitched, her hooves pinched, and her nose itched.
"Uh oh," she said with some worry. "Somepony made a Pinky Promise they shouldn't have!"
"What was that, Pinkie, dear?" Mrs. Cake called from the front.
"Nothing!" she replied as she went backed to mixing the batter.