Have you ever come to the realization that you inadvertently screwed yourself over? You know by asking a question in class or being too good at your job and then you get more work piled on top of you with no extra pay?

Yeah, I was coming to this realization as I walked through the woods in a damn near sheer dress, ballet style flats, my hair done up in a nice french braid (Thanks Rarity, though you may want to kill me next time you see me) and without my materia and my sword stored away in my subspace pocket.

Why am I in the woods you might ask?

Because after getting home from our beach trip and reaching out to Celestia and Luna, I am now a hunter in training.

What were we hunting tonight?

Vampires.

Apparently about a dozen of them had moved into an abandoned farm outside of town. So far they had only killed two people, but even one was too many.

Because the sisters were a known quantity amongst hunters and the supernatural in the area, the pair of them couldn't get close enough to take them out without our prey running off, I was the bait that would flush them out.

Apparently being innocent (Ha!) I was a tempting morsel for the fang faces.

But, being without my magic close at hand, I was feeling very exposed adding to the unease caused by the very, very quiet woods, I was way more nervous than I would have been ordinarily.

Then came the wack to the back of the head and everything went dark.

I came to with a voice that I really did not want to be hearing tonight calling my name.

“Talisman, wake up, please wake up.”

I groaned a bit before replying. “Raven is that you?”

“Yes. Are you alright?” Twilight asked.

“I’ve been better. What are you doing here?” I said as I tried to lift my hand to feel the bump on the back of my head, only to find my hands restrained by rope.

“I went to a bookstore in the next town with Cadance and we were grabbed by these thugs.” Twilight replied, her voice shaky.

“Cadance is here too?” I asked.

“Yeah, not the way I expected my evening to go. Also not the way bondage night usually goes either.” She replied.

I opened my eyes and looked at the older woman, and seeing the completely serious look on her face, I snorted. “Kinky bitch. Well, where are the fuckers that grabbed us?” I said.

“Right here, little hunter.”

I turned and looked at the figure that had spoken.

A reasonably attractive female vampire with dark hair hanging loose walked up, flanked by a pair of large males that were probably her muscle.

“So how could you tell I was a hunter?” I asked, my expression flat and guarded.

“You have the scent of those two sisters from Canterlot on you. Are you their bait?” She asked, gripping my chin to lift my head as she got close to me.

I smiled. “Nope. They are my back up though.”

“Well, if you came to kill us, you should have come armed.” She said.

“Who said I wasn’t you blood sucking bitch?” I replied before pulling at the ropes holding my wrists.

The vampire’s eyes widened as my eyes started glowing and my pupils turned to slits. She had just started to back away when the ropes snapped and I charged forward, grabbing her shoulders and giving her a Krogan greeting.

She dropped to the ground as her two bodyguards and the rest of the coven came out of the shadows to attack me.

Sadly for them as their alpha was dropping, I was summoning the side blades to the fusion sword.

The blades came up and split the two muscle heads from groin to crown. Not quite standard vamp killing procedure, but effective if a bit more messy.

The next couple of moments were a brutal dance of death as I quickly and efficiently decapitated the rest of the coven.

Once the last body had dropped, I dismissed the side blades and summoned the main blade as I walked over to the alpha.

“What are you?” She asked, feeling true fear for probably the first time in centuries.

“Me? Just a SOLDIER, and one very protective girlfriend.” I replied,

“Are you going to kill me?” She asked, trying to play innocent.

I twisted the hilt of the main blade, deploying it.

“Yup. You picked the wrong girl to grab.” I said as I swung the blade, effortlessly removing her head.

Sighing, I dismissed the sword and walked over to Cadance and Twilight, both of whom were looking at me in shock.

I winced slightly, knowing that a twisted smile had appeared on my face during my dance of death and the detached sound of my voice as I spoke to the alpha.

“I’m sorry you two had to see that.” I said as I freed them from their bonds.

“I’m just glad that you came along.” Cadance said. “Though was all that necessary?”

I nodded. “You just got exposed to something that most humans go their whole lives never knowing about. Granted this is my first hunt, but it is about the norm for how these things can go.” I replied just as the doors to the barn burst open, Celestia and Luna charging in.

Celestia had a pair of machetes in her hands, but I had to shake my head at Luna.

“A zweihander? Really?” I asked.

“It does the job.” Luna replied.

“Well, you two are late. All vamps that were reported are down, including the alpha.” I said as I turned to examine Twilight and Cadance.

“Good, no bite marks. You got lucky, otherwise you might just be going on a liquid diet.” I said once I finished checking them over.

“So they really were vampires?” Cadance asked.

“Yup. Just don't go looking to Bram Stoker for tips on fighting them. They don't burst into flames in sunlight, garlic doesn't do shit, stakes to the heart either. Only things that you can do is cut off the head or get them to ingest the blood of a dead man. It's like poison to them.” I said as I moved through the structure looking for other possible victims or recently turned fledglings.

While I was doing this, Luna and Celestia heaved the dead vampires into a pile and began dousing them with an accelerant.

I smelled the air. “Is that, jet fuel?” I asked, recognizing the smell.

“It is. Burns hot enough to make sure that the bodies are destroyed and the higher flash point means that it won’t ignite before we want it too.” Celestia said as she emptied the last of her jerry can onto the pile of corpses before grabbing another and emptying the contents.

“Makes sense.” I replied. “The barn is clear. Did find some cash and loose change though.” I replied as I handed Cadance and Twilight back their belongings.

“Did you take it?” Luna asked, eyebrow arched.

“Mayyyybe...” I stretched out.

Luna and Celestia gave me flat looks.

“What? It’s not like they are going to be spending it. Be glad I am leaving the booze. Goddess knows that I could probably use a drink after the amount of weirdness that has come into my life.” I said.

“So what are Sunset and I?” Twilight asked, a slight edge to her voice.

“Two rocks in the middle of the storm for me my dear. You both have a tendency to be in agreement with me when there is a ‘what the hell’ moment in our lives.” I replied, giving a smile at my adorkable bookworm.

“Good. I am glad that I am not one of the reasons you are driven to drink.” Twilight said, walking over and giving me a hug and a light kiss.

I smiled at her before looking at the older women.

"So what say we light this candle and deass the area?" I asked.

"That would be a prudent move." Luna said. "Also, language."

I rolled my eyes as we walked out of the barn. Once we were a short distance away I turned and threw a few fireballs at the place, causing it to rapidly become fully engulfed.

That done, I turned and wrapped an arm around Twilight's shoulders and headed to where we had parked our cars.

"Celestia will you and Luna get Cadance to her car and home? I will take Twilight home." I said.

Celestia nodded with her usual pleased little smile that seems to say she is proud of you. I lead Twilight through the woods to where my SUV was parked.

"Let's get you home Raven. I can imagine you would like a show and some rest." I said.

"Can I stay with you and Sunset? I'd feel safer if I was with you, at least for tonight." Twilight said.

"Sure, just make sure to let your folks know." I said as we approached my vehicle.

We separated so I could grab the hide a key under the chassis so I could unlock the doors with the spare fob.

Getting in, I grabbed my phone and sent a text to Sunset letting her know the hunt was successful and that Twilight would be spending the night after the ordeal.

Starting the truck, I took Twilight's hand and gave it a gentle squeeze and smiled at her before putting the truck into gear and heading home.

Author's Note

Yes, I LIVE! My family and I recently moved and I have not had a whole heck of a lot of time to write. I have some ideas that will hopefully be quite amusing for you all for this story.