The Memoir

3.00 – Thoughts On Discord

Discord, the “embodiment” of Chaos. A creature of flesh that supposedly represented disorder and confusion. Now was he not logical or reasonable, that is debatable. His existence, though, does pose an interesting question towards rationality and the consequences of the flesh. I will get to the point of this matter and immediately disclose that Discord’s flesh is not his true body. His flesh is a consequence of a purely rational entity trying to enter the flesh. However, I pose a question, how is an entity beyond flesh supposed to understand it or function inside it. The simple answer is it doesn’t. It doesn’t understand the importance of the preservation of the body or the importance of rationality bound in flesh or even flesh in general.

Discord acted on immediate impulses and pleasures like an animal. Doing whatever brought himself pleasure regardless of the consequences it had on others. And no matter what history says, Discord did kill. Removing rationality from a rational creature is equivalent to removing life from the flesh. For any moment that a person suddenly became a lamp, that person no longer existed and was dead. For every boulder he gave consciousness, the suddenly rational boulder wailed as would an infant. Removing this new consciousness from this newly rational boulder was another rational being killed. Discord killed, plain and simple.

But how do you explain death to a creature only days old in the flesh but possibly as old as existence? I do not have a practical answer to this for even Discord had no reason to fear death. I met him in the Evergreen Fields where he was looking at the trees, speaking to himself about one matter or another. There I told him, if he’s come to ruin our State I would end him. He simply smiled and invited it. Taunting that he was already in front of me, so half the work was done. So, I torn him apart. Then I did it again. And again. And again. At one point I forced every cell in his body to enter apoptosis, leaving nothing but a dissolved puddle of proteins, fats, and such. But it didn’t matter. His flesh is like ours but something will always form a new body. These energies grabbed at any flesh it finds and then turns it into a body. Before Discord got bored and killed me, I tore him apart one last time. As the energies went to reach out for flesh, I interfered, sending distinct instruction and rational towards what the energies should look for in flesh.

That was the most painful day of my life. The energies grabbed at me while I pulled at and restructured all I could reach to maintain my form. From that day, the entity known as Discord gained the flesh of a human. It’s an odd feeling rebuilding your mind while a cosmic entity rips it apart. Thoughts and concepts suddenly became impossible to remember but then flashed back into my mind. All I know is that I never wish to experience that feeling again. So as we both regained composure, I immediately went for Discord’s new life. I was met with a claw through my chest and a paw over my horn. I taught him to fear death but also the anger that comes with fear. For the next five moons I was beaten repeatedly to the edge of my life then healed. It was a grand old time. However, Discord never removed or bestowed rationality to any other form of flesh after our time together.

After my beating Discord sat down and stared at me. I regained any composure I could and stared politely back. From there he tried his best to empty his thoughts at me. The human nervous system was not created for perfect rationality but it gave him the clarity that a rational creature like a human has. He still couldn’t understand why his actions were wrong and met with such animosity as certain concepts still lied beyond his young flesh, but he continued. Spouting contradiction after contradiction, confused and lost about all that the flesh is. Communication was even questioned as why would a fleshless entity even need to disclose it thoughts. The conversation was interesting to say the least.

I never figured out what energies actually composed Discord’s true “body”. I couldn’t even gather if he really was the embodiment of disorder. While flesh, rules of existence still applied to Discord, however he could manipulate the universe around him anyway he wanted to, so maybe the rules of existence didn’t actually apply to him. I don’t know. I regret to say this but I just labeled any energies related to Discord as Chaos Magic and left it at that as any phenomenon about him is beyond me.

So now this poses the most interesting question. Is Celestia’s “Tree” actually an entity outside flesh trying to enter it? According to Discord, it is. So the “Tree” is another entity’s attempt at flesh, but like Discord, this entity has no clear idea what flesh entails. But it does understand death without my help. So why does it fear, while Discord didn’t. I cannot answer this, the only evidence I have that the tree even fears death is Discord’s testimony about how it has been trying to hide from him, using my Evergreens. He also disclosed how the “Tree” has been here longer than he has.

So I pose this theory, what if the “Tree” is an evolving flesh. During its first moments of being, the tree was totally irrational but is gaining rationality as time passes. Its attempt at flesh is stationary, unlike Discord, so its development is different than his. What if the “Tree” is still in its Proto form, an irrational crystalline animal allying itself with rational creatures to protect itself and evolve. That would explain its fear of death as it has had time to orient itself to the flesh and its desires and fears. If the “Tree” really is connected to a purely rational entity what’s to say it doesn’t have the capacity to learn from those its aligned itself with. That would explain its reactionary actions as the “tree” is just reacting to its allies needs and wants. Like an all-powerful self-fulfilling Deus ex Machina. Would explain a lot actually. As of right now the “Tree” is still irrational only thinking of survival but it gains rationality from its allies. Copying their needs and wants to a tee. To the point that it will fulfill these needs as if it were its own. So is it rational, or is it the world’s best copycat of rational creatures.

Only time will tell. For now, all we know is the “Tree” has unallied itself with Celestia and her Contemporary Harmony. Either it be fear, boredom, or an actually rational decision made from greater concepts. Who knows? I regret to say that I definitely don’t.
So what does this do to my argument against Contemporary Harmony? I’ll reflect on that later but all those reading this may come to their own conclusions and discuss them with your fellows.

Anyway, back to Discord. The human mind has set needs that must be met for proper development. These needs were neglected and Discord lost his mind. He terrorized the world but could never face me. He avoided anywhere I was like I was the plague. This weakness of his kept most of the Tundra intact as teleportation made it very easy to be in more than one place at any given moment. I couldn’t give this same treatment to our neighbors however as my power does not entail complete mastery over magic and all concepts attached to it. Teleportation around the Tundra was burdening enough, teleportation around the world would have killed me.

In the end, I wasn’t needed. The “Tree” and its allies bound Discord to a stationary flesh. One beyond his understanding, thus removing all his ability to interact with the world around him. I hope he isn’t conscious now, I don’t know how the inability to act with the world will affect him. Let’s just not think about it for now. We have yet to gain the privilege to think about morality towards any and all enemies of our State.

3.01 – Trees

The Everfree Forest is a terrifying place. Why Celestia decided to make her home there for a time is beyond me. The air itself is filled with energies much too similar to Discord for it to be comfortable by any means. Maybe it was for safety, but that does not matter anymore. Her new home is atop such a lonely mountain. Kind of symbolic really. But I am getting off track.

The Everfree Tree is a master piece of survival. All it needs is sufficient soil and ambient magic, a radiation that is found throughout all of Eques. Cells are supercharged with magic only for it to be transformed into Chaos. This Chaos is then metabolized to keep these trees alive. However, only a portion of this Chaos is used as energy. The rest is released into the environment. The Chaos then breaks down in the sunlight to form heat and regular ambient magic. One plant, the Poison Joke, takes in the Chaos and reverts it back into traditional magic that it uses as energy for most traditional metabolic processes.

I’ve imported many a Poison Joke for study and genetic manipulation. And I can say they were pivotal to the reconstruction of our state after the terror of the Night Mare. I’ve also managed to acquire an Everfree Tree. These plants are very much copies of ones I’ve created. Experiments show a direct lineage from those created in the Tundra and those in the Everfree. This information is also backed by genetic data found when decoding the genome of these plants. So the “Tree” most definitely has an understanding of survival and what it entails. Clever thing. It also recognizes patterns as genetic manipulation to this level would at least require that. Any other observations have yet to prove anything definite.

Now, Evergreens are still present in our modern State. Driven almost to extinction by the cold, they recovered during my time as a star. However, the lack of nutrient rich soil drove them to numbers below any defined endangered line. Seven remained by the time I returned from the sky. Seven trees, each over twenty meters in diameter and tens of hundreds stories tall. That was all that was left of the proud Evergreen Fields. It was an understatement to say wood was in shortage. By the time we rebuilt everything to an appropriate level, only three trees remain. We recovered any dead wood we could but no organic compound could survive one hundred years in open sunlight, warmth, and moisture without some form of decomposition.

Anyway, the trees are back to appropriate numbers for trade and loans. I, myself, am developing a copy of the Everfree trees to make use as armor against mages. It has been successful so far. As long as the wood is a living flesh, it converts magics directed at it to heat. Easy way to defend against magics if the spell quite literally goes up in smoke. However, decreases in ambient magic is known to warp DNA and is cancerous to most living flesh on Eques. So this may be a dead venture. An interesting note though, is that sudden increases in ambient magics and Chaos leads to instantaneous metamorphosis which can be reverted. This is strange and interesting at the same time. This may lead to a new school of science as the difference between species on Eques may be simple gene expression altered by the flow of ambient magics through the flesh. This would be supported by the fact that most species only have a 0.000001% difference between genomes. That small percent may actually only code for a protein that regulates the flow of magic into the flesh. More research is needed but this is interesting enough.

3.02 – Afterthought

The “Tree” may actually be on its way to rationality, or as rational as flesh will allow it to be. But this is good news. Maybe the Tree will ally itself with one that is more reasonable. Hopefully, a being that isn’t just one step from being defined as all powerful. As I theorized before, maybe a simple mage would suffice, one that is flawed and still learning about the flesh themselves. But one can only hope.
I also hope that one day I could build Discord a proper body, one that may be able to link his pure fleshless rationality to the flesh but I wouldn’t even know where to start. Maybe that too is a dead venture. I don’t know.

Finally, regarding the rebuilding of our State. This will be discussed in the next chapter as such a momentous task deserves its own section. Infrastructure alone takes up a multi-book series. And I can’t even get started on Law, electricity, plumbing, or any other important information that may serve our State well. There is also the fact that my memory has been failing me lately. But what can one of the flesh really complain about when they are over a couple thousand winters old. If I was still a traditional human, I’d be but the dirt our crops are grown in.