Horror is Magic

Chapter 2: You scream, I scream, the zombies don’t, but they should.

Pinkie goes straight to Sugar Cube Corner, determined to have a party. She quickly locks the door, to prevent uninvited guests. She spots an ice cream server and loses self control. She begins to eat ice cream right out of the server.

Pinkie: *muffled* Disth is great! *swallows ice cream* All these sweets! I’ll throw a great party!

Pinkie sets out a giant party table full of sweets of all kinds. But nobody comes. She waits and waits, but nobody arrives.

Pinkie looks distressed.

Pinkie: *tearing up* Nobody came to my party? Is it because they are zombies? Are they still my friends if they are zombies?

To test out this theory, Pinkie lets a zombie in, Bon Bon. Bon Bon decides that Pinkie would make a good snack and bites her hoof. Pinkie quickly relinquishes Bon Bon’s skull with another bat from her hidden bat collection.

Pinkie: She bit me… is nobody my friend now? Am I… Alone?

Pinkie’s hair turns flat as she looks at her infected hoof, and then out the window.

Pinkie: *suddenly cracks a huge smile* I’ll MAKE them my friends! I’ll MAKE them happy! I’ll cure them all!

Pinkie finds herself scribbling “Smile Smile Smile” on every wall, Pinkie then opens up a closet full of candy making tools and knives.

Pinkie: Time for a party! *maniacal cackling*

Zombies are gathering at the door, hungry for pony flesh. Loud whirring sounds come from inside.

Pinkie: She bit my hoof… I don’t need it.

Pinkie uses a buzz saw to cut her hoof off, and she replaces it with a giant gumdrop.

Pinkie: It didn’t even hurt! Right hoof? *holds her hoof stuffed with cotton candy up to her head* *bad ventriloquism* Right Pinkie!

Pinkie opens a cabinet of duct tape and starts getting to work.

Pinkie: *singing*

These zombies are all frowning,

Because they took their final breath,

But they should have no fear,

Because I’m the angel of death,

I’ll free them from their frowns today,

And then we’ll have a big par-tay!

So Smile, Smile, Smile!

Because this-is-the-daaaaaaay!

Horray!

Soon, the zombies begin to punch holes in the door. Little do they know that Pinkie has just finished her party planning.

Pinkie: *throws knives through the door* ARE YOU READY TO PARTY ZOMBIES?

Zombies: Grasggsghhhhhhhhhhh…..

Pinkie: *takes out makeshift swords made out of panhandles and knives* THEN LET’S GET THIS PARTY STARTED!

Pinkie: *slashing through zombies* WHAT’S WRONG EVERYPONY?! WE ARE HAVING A PARTY! LAUGH! HAHA!

Her swords break after a few swings and she takes out knives attached to oven mitts.

Pinkie: *slashing* The party’s… not over yet…

Pinkie dismembers over 50 zombies before fatigue finally sets in. Her sugar rush has ended. Exhausted, she faces the sun and she closes her eyes.

Pinkie: I’m… tired… zombies… you can party now… but don’t forget the dessert… I’ve prepared a special treat for you… *Pinkie lights a makeshift grenade full of sugar* It’s a real… blast… Smile… Smile…….. Smile……. Ha!

The grenade bursts in a sugary explosion, crystallizing everything within 100 meters. Pinkie lies in the center, frozen in sugar, smiling.