Ms. Muffins lay in a bed more plush than she could possibly have imagined, had she not made deliveries to Canterlot Castle before, tossing a red ball with white stars on it up in the air with her forehooves and catching it as it fell back into her reach. In order to distract herself from the emotional turmoil of what just happened, she focused on the ball and her almost obscenely lavish surroundings. It wasn't right to call her location a prison cell... more like a prison suite. Equestria's concept of a minimum security prison was a wing of the Castle that while fully furnished was almost never used, and in fact the only hints that it was a prison at all were the bars over the windows and the fact that the door locked from the outside.

She tried to distract herself, but she failed. Thanks to its no longer having to compensate for her wayward eyes, her brain was going on what she thought was overdrive until she realized that this is just how it was going to be from now on. She could think faster and more thoroughly than she ever remembered being able to. And she could also remember so much. Her mind blessed her with memories of past victories and cursed her with failures with equal disregard to how she felt about them...

She remembered winning her first Junior Flyer's Competition... and that her parents weren't there to see it, having had to work a double shift at the Weather Factory that day.

She remembered winning the Most Creative entry at the Applewood Derby in spite of not even being a resident at the time... and also the haunting wails of the white filly local who had genuinely poured her heart into that work.

She remembered the love of her life... and the pain of having lost it.

She remembered all of Dinky's firsts: her first steps, her first tooth, her first words, her first time taking flight... Derpy's vision blurred, and the red ball struck her in the forehead, but she didn't really care. She remembered her daughter's first earth-borne fall, her first time accidentally biting herself, her first tantrum, her first harsh reunion with the ground from the sky. Her first birthday party, her first funeral...

The trip down memory lane didn't save the gray pegasus from the grievances of the more immediate past. The look of perpetual misery briefly vanishing from the face of the stallion who helped her with a problem every other pony in her life simply chose to ignore. She wanted to spend time wondering if he did that a lot, but her mind relentlessly marched forward into the issue she was avoiding.

Her daughter didn't betray her. Derpy didn't know if it would have been better or worse if she had. She didn't want to know. She didn't want to think about it, about how Dinky had inflicted this wound on both of their hearts out of love for her. Until she had, Derpy hadn't really wrapped her mind around just how fast the change her therapy had brought was. While her vision hadn't cleared up until about the time the headaches were more or less gone, Dinky's attitude toward her had changed almost immediately. That meant that her eyes must have been continuing to try to orient themselves properly without her direct intent after just the first session. Her heart wanted to soar and shatter at the same time.

Not one to wallow in her misery, the pegasus popped out of bed and into a standing position, then strolled to the door and knocked on it.

"Excuse me!" she called through the door. "I don't want to be a bother, but I would like to know how long I'm going to be in here!"

The door didn't respond. Since her prison suite was comparable to a five-horseshoe penthouse with its own fridge and a bathroom bigger than her living room, the alarm at the idea was dull and muffled. But it was there, and she didn't have anything better to do. She knocked again.

"Hello?"

Still no response.

"Is there anypony out there? Hellooo!"

Silence.

There was no peephole, so she crouched to look through the gap under the door for shadows. There were none. The alarm in the back of her mind was no longer muffled. A few hard vibrations through her hooves drew Derpy's face the rest of the way to the floor. She cupped her ear against it and heard a commotion. She didn't know what to make of that. It could be anything from somepony having frosted Princess Celestia's cake incorrectly to the Castle being invaded again.

Now Derpy was terribly afraid that she'd been forgotten, and informed of just how such fine accommodations as those she'd been provided with could serve as a deterrent from future crime. A locked suite in Canterlot Castle was a fine place to stay, so long as nothing was happening. But with trouble raining from the skies, it was a threat zone that couldn't be escaped. She could die here, surrounded by expensive, pretty things that weren't the least bit helpful for anything.

"I'm sorry, Princess Celestia..." Derpy thought out loud, unaware of the fact that the Princess was in another castle.

Taking a stiff glide across the massive room, she slammed her forehooves into the door, one in its center and one near its latch -only to find that she had grossly overestimated the strength of the lock. She rode the door halfway across the broad hallway and winced as she saw the latch assembly punch into the wall across from her and stick. Despite herself, she was actually more alarmed at the idea of the guards' utter lack of response to her escape attempt than she thought she would have been if she'd suddenly found herself surrounded by them.

The commotion was louder when magnified by the hall's acoustics, and she managed to pick enough words out to learn that the Princesses had been ponynapped. Again. The guards were, of course, taking it pretty hard. So much so, in fact, that she was tempted to forego her escape attempt to try to go console them. Derpy decided better of it when she realized that a guard receiving comfort from a fugitive from his own prison was simply not possible. Instead, she focused on finding a window to bolt out through (though at this point she was sure she could just take the main doors) and reuniting with her daughter. It didn't take long, which left her with far too much time to focus on the conversation she was dreading having to have with Dinky.

* * *

Lightning Dust couldn't believe her luck. Apparently that beanpole unicorn's innate desire to satisfy her customer overrode even the peak of her anger, and the teleportation spell had dumped her off inside what could only be described as a swanky fetish boutique. The scent of latex assaulted her until she was forced to admit that she kind of liked it. In the meantime, she just sat and looked around, dumb-foundedly taking in her surroundings. A feminine cough drew her attention to a pony wearing what looked like a business suit with a microskirt made of the store's most ubiquitous material, showing off a Cutie Mark that looked like the product of a hateful coupling between a whip and a rake. Once there, her attention announced its refusal to leave.

The mare in question had The Goddess's long, straight, and brilliant red mane and that's where the similarity ended. Her coat was somewhere between yellow and bronze and looked... fake somehow. Like she'd taken the pains to dye her entire body that color. Her eyes were a light brown that reflected the red of her hair and seemed perpetually illuminated by a camera flare. Her horn was as long as one of Lightning's legs, and nearly half as thick, but much more rounded at the tip than she'd ever seen before. Her teeth were so white that Lightning wondered if ponies in her presence habitually wore shades just in case she smiled. She was as much taller than Lightning as Sassy had been, but unlike the latter actually came across as full-figured.

"The name's Cat-O-Nine." the taller mare said by way of introduction, her warm and cultured voice doing little to rein in her no-nonsense tone. She had an accent that hinted at origins in that one country where the laws of fashion were practically written. Its name eluded Lightning, who struggled to work out her response. "How did you get in here? I locked the doors and didn't hear anything break."

"L-Li-Lightning Dust. I tele-was teleported in! By a unicorn! She was tall like you, only uh..." she swallowed as she tried and failed to restrain her eyes from raking over the mare's body again as they took the scenic route to finding a defining difference between Cat and Sassy that wouldn't come across as insipid or offensive. "Blue."

"Blue? Oh my. Don't tell me Sassy Saddles sent you my way." Cat said, smiling down at Lightning, who was only spared the glare off the taller mare's teeth by her crimson tresses falling down to cast her face into shadow. It was still super bright and equally frightening. "I told her when I fired her that I didn't want to ever hear from her again, even second-hoof."

"Well maybe the two of you might want to try avoiding getting potential customers caught up in your personal drama?" Lightning snapped back, siding by default with a fellow recipient of unwanted employment termination.

She stood defiantly, drawing herself up to her full height of just beneath Cat's lowered chin. In hindsight, Lightning didn't even know why she let Cat intimidate her. Sure, she was bigger and prettier and gave off strong vibes of sexual aggression, but the pegasus didn't own anything in the shop and was pretty sure she could kick the unicorn's ass. Which was a large part of why she was proud of herself for not immediately demonstrating that ability when Cat burst out laughing.

"You're right, Sweetie. I'm sorry." Cat replied, though her tone indicated that she wasn't even remotely sorry. She used her right hoof to brush back half of her mane past the corresponding ear. "Let me make it up to you. I'll give you a 10% discount on your Starter Package and a free subscription of your choice between Adventures at Home Monthly or Brave New World. This way, please."

Lightning opened her mouth to respond and was rewarded for doing so with the distinct flavor of expensive conditioner as Cat's tail slapped her in the face with her turn. Words were forgotten as she tried first to spit the horrible taste out and then to scrape it off her tongue with her hooves. Bitterly, she followed the larger mare to the front of the store. There, she saw a shelf lined with a row of large boutique bags, each with the face of a somewhat familiar-looking yellow mare on the front with a long pink mane and tape over her mouth. She noted that the way they were spaced would have allowed for seven bags on the shelf, but including the one that was taken down and presented to her, there were only three. And it was Friday, hinting that Cat had somehow predicted exactly how many of the things she'd sell during the week, including to customers who didn't know they were going to be customers.

"So uh... What's in the bag?" Lightning asked as she hoofed around in it, noting a massive bottle of lubricant, some hose, a small bottle of what claimed to be a cleaning solution, a strap on, a book, and some other things she couldn't identify without removing anything.

"Just some basic essentials for your first adventure. Lube, enema kit, basic instructional manual, faux military prep-school uniform, training beads, the like. You'll want to practice and study a lot if you don't to make yourself look like a complete idiot while trying to seduce your partner." Cat replied, her tone and smile indicating that she was daring Lightning to get defensive, but the smaller mare's full-body cringe actually managed to garner some sympathy. It became apparent that this one was not a Canterlot native.

"Aw Tartarus, am I really that obvious about it?" Lightning asked, realizing that her demeanor must have screamed "prude" as loudly to Cat as Cat's did "whore" to her. And they were in the whore's domain. Lightning might as well have been picking a fight with a seahorse in the water.

"Yes," came the matter-of-fact response. Cat wasn't pulling any punches. "Nopony with experience enters a fetish shop against her will, nor do they look as hopelessly lost as you did while here. You obviously don't know what you're doing, and unless you put some effort into learning, you're going to hurt yourself and/or your partner."

Lightning's ears drooped from the gravity of the situation she had gotten herself into. She was expecting this to be a quick and easy little game she could play to make certain that stallion's eyes were on nopony but her, but apparently even getting her plot plowed was something that an Equestria Game-level activity could be made out of. Until now, that possibility would never have crossed her mind. By extension, her eyes were opened to the possibility of similar levels of complexity and effort being potentially demanded of all ponies in any given activity. Cat lowered her head until the two of them were at eye level with one another.

"I could give you some basic lessons myself, and I'm feeling generous so I'll only charge half my usual rate. But I have to ask before we get started: are you certain this partner you've got your eyes on worth this level of effort and personal expense?" Cat asked, and Lightning was certain those blood-red-looking eyes were boring into her soul for its answer. Colt, was she in for a surprise.

"Of course not," Lightning replied, her tone indicating that she'd been asked an elementary-school level question. "I'm doing this for me. I only care about what he wants as far as it can help me win."

"Win?" Cat raised her head back to its proper place and blinked, cocked it to the right, and blinked again. Confusion was vivid on her face. "Win what, exactly?"

Lightning inhaled hard and opened her mouth to respond with the fiercest snap she could muster, but stopped when she realized she didn't have an answer. To be honest with herself, perhaps for the first time in her life, there was no tangible benefit to coming out ahead in this competition. Looking back, she realized that Torque had only ever treated her as a customer, albeit a highly valued one. And it's not like his attentions to that grey mare had diminished the services he provided Lightning. In fact, the two mares rarely saw one another, and the other one would probably would be surprised to learn that Lightning had more or less declared war on her for... nothing, really. Attention, at best, but she already had that and found herself at a loss for how she'd been reciprocating.

"I think you should leave," Cat said, echoing Lightning's conclusion. The smaller mare looked up and saw an unusual coldness in the larger one's eyes. "And before you ever think about setting hoof in my establishment again, you should seriously reconsider your stance on the value of other ponies. Especially those you plan to try inviting into your bed."

Lightning thought she was going to have a snarky comeback in the vein of poor customer service, but if she was honest with herself, Cat almost couldn't get that shop door open fast enough. It was slammed shut between them, and Lightning distracted herself by watching the rain hit the empty street. It was such an odd thing to see on a somewhat arid night, and she didn't hear either the rest of the rain or any of the other things that typically accompanied it. But it was definitely raining, just like on the day she was kicked out of the Wonderbolts. It was almost like the weather knew exactly when her life took a hard dive and she only had herself to blame.

Author's Note

Free e-cookie to anyone who correctly guesses who Cat-O-Nine is modeled after.