The Honorable Princess Judge Twilight Sparkle

"Doctor v. Glimmer" By: Stupidhand14

Twilight took a sip from her cup of coffee (or as Princess Luna calls it, her Draught of Caffeine), smoothing over her outfit, she double checked her case notes, making sure it was all organized by the dewey decimal system (the only true way to organize).She was once again wearing the required outfit for court, now she just had to wait for Bailiff Macintosh to announce her.

As if on queue the stallions strange soprano voice rung out across the court “All rise for the Honorable Princess Judge Twilight Sparkle.”

Stepping out to the court, she saw that it was less overflowing than it had been the previous week. That still meant there were several ponies forced to stand, and a couple pegasi were forced to sit on the support struts holding up the roof, but there weren’t any waiting outside.

Sitting down, she turned to her bailiff. “Thank you, Big Mac. Everypony may now be seated…” A single strand of hair fell into her eyes. She forced it back into the bun as she sat. “Court is now in session.”

Her gaze turned to the ponies she would need to deal with. To her surprise, her own student, Starlight Glimmer, was the defendant, while the plaintiff was The Doctor, which was surprising, since in Twilight’s eyes he was usually the most reasonable pony in town next to Octavia.

“The court case of The Doctor versus Starlight Glimmer is now in session. Do you both swear to tell the whole truth and nothing but the truth while you are inside this court room?” Both ponies nodded their consent. “Very well. Plaintiff, please, explain your case.”

The Doctor looked around the court, as if for the first time realizing he was the center of attention. Clenching his teeth, he forced a smile. “Twilight, do---”

“Princess Twilight,” Big Macintosh interjected, with a glare that had enough venom in it that it could give a hydra heartburn.

“Apologies. Princess Twilight do y---”

“But the only name you should be using is Honorable Princess Judge Twilight Sparkle.” Big Macintosh’s glare was so powerful it could turn Discord and a Cockatrice to stone.

“O-of course!” The Doctor visibly shook, his legs looking as if they’d give out beneath him. “Honorable Princess Judge Twilight Sparkle, do you think we could make this court a bit more private?”

Twilight raised an eyebrow. “Might I ask why?”

“This case relates to secrets that could unravel the very rug of the universe! Space, time, gravity, all of their mechanics would be revealed and anypony here could use it to destroy the multiverse.”

“Very well.” Twilight pulled out her inflatable gavel, slamming it, releasing its loud squeaky noise. She forced herself to keep a straight face, silently sending a prayer that Celestia would send her an actual gavel soon. “Big Macintosh, please escort everypony out of the courtroom.”

As he moved to comply with the request, the Doctor just had to interrupt. “Actually, Honorable Princess Judge Twilight Sparkle, Ditzy, Octavia, and Roseluck don’t need to leave, as they are my traveling companions, and they already know the inner workings of the space, time rug.”

“Very well. Bailiff, please escort everypony except for those three out of the courtroom.” As he moved towards her, she held up a hoof. “Besides myself. You can carry me out later today.” she replied with a saucy wink.

Big Mac moved into the crowd, a baton swinging mercilessly at anypony who didn’t vacate the court immediately, Twilight cringed and was about to stop him when she heard the telltale squeak of a blow up toy coming from the officer's baton…

She cringed, she still couldn’t believe that Ponyville couldn’t afford real equipment for something as delicate court.

“Now, you may begin, Doctor.”

“Thank you,” he said, bowing. “I know this may surprise you, but this mare is not the perfect student that you think she is. She nearly doomed all of Equestria by violating my patent and monopoly. She illegally stole magic from Canterlot and went through the multiverse by changing the past.”

“This is already known to Us, but as the ponies she harmed by changing the past were undone with the future being righted, she cannot be prosecuted.” She couldn’t help but sigh. She had tried so hard to find some charge to take Starlight to court, but nothing materialized.

“While I understand that, she used multiple spell mechanics that are patented by myself, and violated my government given monopoly on time travel. This means that she must surrender her Tardis, pay me, and sign an oath never time travel again.”

“Very well. Starlight, how do you plead?”

“Twilight, you know this is ridiculous. A monopoly on Time Travel? That doesn’t even make any sense.” She turned to The Doctor. “Besides, I’ll have you know I made 90% of that spell up on the spot, so I couldn’t have stolen it,” She flailed her arms. “Hell I couldn’t have stolen it even if I wanted to, I was on a tight schedule, I had to literally throw together a revenge spell, running on nothing but coffee, energy drinks, and a week old box of doughnuts!”

“You still violated the laws of space and time, and put the entire universe in danger… multiple times!” the Doctor shouted.

“You tell him, Doc!” Ditzy shouted from the crowd of three.

“Silence from the gallery,” Bailiff Macintosh said, though his voice was strong enough to cause a small echo in the room.

Twilight turned to the defendant, who looked almost bored, if her staring out the window showed anything. “Starlight, how do you respond?”

“Huh?” Starlight looked up from her notes, as if remembering what she needed to do. “Oh, right.” Clearing her throat, she went on. “I don’t see why you need to listen to this guy, Princess Judge Twilight Sparkle, he won’t even give us his real name! How do you know he actually has a patent out if you can’t even look up his real name!?”

“I have told you my name multiple times!” the earth pony interjected. “It’s not my fault you never understand it!”

Starlight let out a huff. “What is it then?”

“Doctor.”

Starlight closed her eyes rubbing her temple. “Doctor who?”

The stallion nodded. “Exactly.”

“Alright, well, Dr. Exactly, as I was say---”

“No, not Dr. Exactly!”

“Well, then tell me: Doctor, who?!”

“Exactly!”

At this point, Twilight once again slammed her inflatable gavel, eliciting a squeak to fill the room. “Starlight, please continue with your argument. The name is not important, at this time. He has already shown proof of his patent.”

“Oh, right.” Starlight had the conscious to look embarrassed. “Well, as for his claims, if I infringed on his copyright, it would mean that he stole from Starswirl’s time travelling spell, and, if it is derivative work from that, then it is currently in the public domain, meaning it’s legal to use for free.”

Twilight’s eyebrows knitted together for a second, contemplating Equestria’s copyright law. After a few seconds, a strand of hair fell from her bun and into her eyes. However, with a simple spell (based around the same magic it takes to move the sun), she set it back in place.

This was a sticky situation, and would likely set a precedent in copyright law for years to come. Which meant that she would have to be very careful… but, then again, this could be an opportunity for a friendship lesson. And if she put a friendship lesson resolution as a precedent, Celestia might very well reward her with an actual gavel (maybe even two!).

“I have reached a verdict.” Twilight slammed her inflatable gavel again. “Starlight, your punishment for infringing on copyright is to assist the Doctor as one of his ‘companions’ for a day.”

“Twilight, this sounds suspicious…” Starlight looked back at the only other ponies out in the gallery. From there, she could see each of the three mares brandishing a variety of sharp and blunt objects. “And could get me killed.”

“I’m sure it’ll be fine.” Twilight waited until the Doctor all but dragged Starlight away, with three other mares carrying their weapons of war out with them. The moment the door closed, her bun fell apart, causing her mane to fall back into it’s neat, yet nerdy (and fashionable) style.

“So, Spike, did you stay awake this…” Spike was, once again, asleep, head first, on the typewriter. Making a mental note to transfer some paper from the Royal Paper Storage Fortress, she levitated Spike off the keys and carried him to the side room.