I’m reminded of how sore I am on my walk to Sugarcube Corner. I try hard not to limp or waddle, but every few steps the pain shoots up from deep inside me and I’m forced to alter my gait.

Still, it’s a Sunday morning, and Ponyville’s streets are occupied mostly by friends going for walks in small groups. They’re all too engaged in their own lives to notice my awkward trot. Nopony sees me. Nopony ever sees me.

I enter Sugarcube Corner and a small bell rings over my head. Only a few of the restaurant’s tables and booths are hosting ponies. They look happy. Lyra and Bon Bon are seated across from each other nearby. They both wave at me. I wave back weakly. Despite all my sleep, I still feel so tired.

There’s only one group in front of me in line. I wait. I avoid looking at Lyra and Bon Bon. I start to wonder how I’m going to do this. Should I order something? I am quite hungry…

“Noteworthy, dearie!” I hear up ahead.

I snap out of my stupor and realize I’m the only one in line. The group has taken a booth. I clear my throat and trot up to the counter where Mrs. Cake smiles at me with bright pink eyes.

“Good morning, Noteworthy!” she says in a bouncy voice. “What can I getcha?”

“Nnnn-I don’t know.” I chuckle to myself and rub my eyes with the back of a hoof. “I know I’m hungry, but beyond that I’m too tired to think.”

“Oh-ho-ho! Sweet Noteworthy, you ought to go to bed earlier, don’tcha know?” She winks at me. “Just wait til you have kids of your own, eh? You don’t know what tired is yet, I’ll tell ya!”

I smile. “I don’t doubt that. I guess I’ll just have a―”

“Uh-uh! It won’t do to pick willy nilly, silly stallion.” She trots along the counter and opens the swinging doors into the kitchen. “Come on back here and help me taste test some things, eh? That’ll help you decide.”

I gulp. I can see where this is going. In my mind, I steel myself. This is what I wanted.

“Yeah, that sounds great,” I say, joining her. I keep my eyes forward, hoping that Lyra and Bon Bon aren’t paying attention. “Thanks, that’s really nice of you.”

“Sure thing, dearie. We’re only open for another couple of hours, anyway. Carrot!” she calls to her husband.

Mr. Cake trots from the kitchen wearing a stained apron. He beams at me. “Hey, Noteworthy! Good to see you!”

“Thanks, Mister Cake,” I say. My voice cracks. “Good to see you, too.”

“Carrot, will you switch me spots, honey bun?” She smiles sweetly. “I’ll cook breakfast for the rest of the day if you take the orders.”

“Sure thing, Cup.” He squints at me. “And what did you need, partner?”

“Noteworthy wants to learn how to make Germane pancakes!” She waggles her eyebrows. “He’s going on a date soon with a mare from Mulenich!”

“Oh, woooow, going after the foreign type, hmm?” Mr. Cake chuckles at himself and puts on a cocky expression. “A stallion after my own heart, it seems.”

“Oh, Carrot,” says Mrs. Cake, flicking a hoof in the air. “I’m hardly foreign.”

“Caneighda isn’t Equestria, is it, now?” Mr. Cake slides off his apron and steps past us, kissing his wife on the cheek. “You go on back, honey pot. I’ll take the front til we close at eleven.”

“Thanks, Cutie Carrot.” She nuzzles him quickly and then ushers the two of us into the kitchen.

“Mulenich?” I ask when we’re alone.

“Oh-ho! I think quick on my hooves, dearie.” She turns to an order of Freignch toast on the stove and confidently flips over a few pieces with a spatula. “So, are you willing to help me today?”

One short laugh comes through my snout. “Yes. I’m always willing to help.”

“Good! That’s why I like you, Noteworthy.” Her round face hardens a bit. “Just remember, it’s nothing romantic between us. I love my husband. I just… have a hard time getting excited with him after all these years.”

“I understand,” I say. “You’ve told me this before.”

“Yes, well, it deserves repeating, dearie.” She breathes in deeply. “You come at a good time. I know Carrot’s horny. He’ll be wanting some sexy time when we put the twins down for a nap later.”

“Rmm…” I hold in a cough.

“Any help would be appreciated,” Mrs. Cake says. “Even if it’s a few hours off, I’m sure whatever you’re willing to give me will be a big help later. I don’t have the most wild imagination, don’tcha know?”

“Mm hm.”

“Right then, Carrot won’t come back here while I’m cooking. It makes him feel insecure about his talent.” She suddenly widens her hind legs and lifts her tail without turning away from the cooking breakfast. “Any time you’re ready, Noteworthy. Just remember, no intercourse!” She tittered.

I swallow hard and stare at her light blue pussy. The swirling pink tail above it keeps me in the moment.

I rub my neck with a hoof. I hate this. It doesn’t turn me on. I like Mr. Cake. I’m not in this to break hearts.

Then why am I in this?

I let go of my own jaw and reach for her vagina. She’s humming to herself, as if nothing is about to happen. I close my eyes, silently sigh, and touch the top of her slit.

“Oo!” She shudders. “Noteworthy! Your hoof is so warm.”

I don’t respond. I slide the edge of my hoof down her pussy, all the way to her clitoris, and then rub up to her anus. It pulses at my touch.

“Oh-ho-ho, careful, dearie,” she says. “Carrot would never go there.”

Neither would I, I think to myself, and continue rubbing the outside of her privates, careful not to bump her asshole again. Mine stings enough for the both of us.

“Mmm, that feels great,” she says. “Hold on a sec. This order’s done.” She moves about the kitchen efficiently, tossing the Freignch toast from a pan onto a plate, adding a few slices of fruit on the side, and then pushing the whole thing through a narrow slot above the sink where we heard it slide to Mr. Cake.

“Order for Blossomforth!” The voice sounds distant. Not much noise can pass between the kitchen and the restaurant proper. I feel a bit safer.

“Now go on, Noteworthy, you’re doing great,” she says. “And anytime you want to stop, you go right ahead. I’m not trying to force you into anything, you know?”

“I know,” I say. She turns back to her job, and I bend lower, digging my hoof into the folds of her blue pussy. The closer I get, the easier it is to ignore her tail and focus on the bright blue color of her heavy plot.

“Oh my!” She stops scrambling eggs for a moment to steady herself. “Ohh, yeah… yes, that’s very nice there…”

I run my hoof back and forth over the moistening flaps between her thighs. The whole area darkens in color while I stare at it. The closer I get to the bright blue pussy, the more I want it in my mouth.

“All right, dearie, slow down,” Mrs. Cake says, giggling. “I won’t be seeing Carrot for a long while yet, eh?”

My other hoof rises to focus on playing with her clitoris while the first applies more pressure, pushing it and out while I explore the soft, wet folds.

“Oo!” Mrs. Cake shudders and hunches forward. “Noteworthy! All right! Slow down a bit, why don’tcha?”

I ignore her, and she doesn’t press me. My eyes are inches from the pussy now. My mind is racing. Why am I doing this? I wish she had wings. The blue of my hooves is so complimentary to the sky blue curves of her ass, the dark blue of her reproductive flesh…

I lap up her juices. They taste like syrup.

“Oohh my gosh!” Mrs. Cake gasps.

I lean down and lick her clitoris. I push my lips into the deepest layers of her, sucking lightly while my tongue explores the hairless skin within.

“Ohh, Carrot! Yes! Carrot, do it!” Mrs. Cake’s imagination is better than she gives it credit for. “Get in there with your tongue! I love it, Carrot! You don’t have to be scared!”

I’m not. My vision is foggy. I lick her and jam my tongue as deep as it will go. My mouth is doing all the work. I hold her flanks with my hands and trace my hooves over the wrong Cutie Marks. She’s too enthralled to notice.

My brain is wrestling with itself. My tongue moves left and right over the bump at the base of her pussy. It moves with me, under her skin. She’s trying not to scream.

She doesn’t have wings. She doesn’t have wings. She doesn’t have wings.

I start to chew, very softly, but enough for my teeth to tingle. I hear Mrs. Cake swear to herself, but she pushes her ass harder into my face. I take a deep breath and envelope my own snout into her body, licking and slurping and dying inside.

“Do it, Carrot. Go farther.” She arches her back downward; her pussy opens up wider. “Put it inside me.”

I back up, breathing hard. “Are you sure, Missus Cake?” I ask in a whisper.

“It’s not you, Noteworthy,” she hisses back with her eyes shut tight. “This is all for my husband. I’m just getting excited. It has nothing to do with you.”

“Right. Right.” I rear up on two legs and rub my own dick. It’s getting softer. I grab Mrs. Cake’s swirly tail and push it straight up along her back. I don’t look at it. I imagine more colors between my hooves and stare at her round, blue plot.

“Get inside me, Carrot!” Mrs. Cake moans. “Give me more children!”

I block out her voice. There’s a raspy scream in my head instead, a husky pleading. I obey it, jamming my pulsing penis into her bright blue slot. It’s so warm and bumpy inside.

“Yes! Yes, Carrot, I want it!” She’s nodding. Her mane bounces at the top of my vision. It’s too smooth. “I want it, Carrot! I want it hard!”

I begin to plow the baker. My erection fluctuates with my frustrated imagination. I have to keep my eyes open; I can’t think of her, I can’t think of her, Mrs. Cake doesn’t have wings.

“It feels like the first time, Carrot!” says Mrs. Cake. “Remember the first time? Oh, we were so young!”

“Nnngggggh!” I stare at the ceiling. The bags under my eyes are twitching. My back teeth grind together.

“You can do it, Carrot!” Mrs. Cake says. “I can feel it. I know it’s there! You don’t have to wait for me, Carrot. Do it! Cum inside me!”

“NnnrrrrrrRainbow Dash!” I shout. In an instant, I pull out of Mrs. Cake. My penis slides between her plot cheeks, aimed straight upward. It shakes as I cum, shooting white semen in thick lines on her lower back. I watch some tangle in her tail hairs.

“I’m sorry,” I’m already saying before the feeling goes away. “I’m sorry, I’m sorry, Mrs. Cake, I’m so sorry…”

But Mrs. Cake turns around with a smile. She’s breathing hard and shaking her head. “Don’t be sorry, Noteworthy. That was perfect. I’ll remember this tonight. I might even cum for him.” She sighs heavily. “And I’m so relieved this isn’t about me.”

I blink. “Huh?”

She gently pushes me out of her. I land on four trembling hooves while she finds a hoof towel in a low drawer.

“Rainbow Dash, hm?” she asks. “You’re a stallion of good taste, at least. She’s really something, that one.”

“What?” I’m shaking all over. “No! No, I don’t… it’s not about, I mean, it’s not about you, I just want to help mares who are… I’m just trying to help mares feel the way they ought to feel, you know? Because they’re good mares, like you, you’re a good mare, and I just want to help―”

“Relax, Noteworthy!” Mrs. Cake runs the dishtowel under a stream of water from the faucet and begins to clean my cum out of her tail. “I won’t tell anypony, I promise. After all, we both have a big secret here, eh?”

I glance at the food slot above the sink and gulp. “Y-y-you don’t think he heard us?”

“Carrot? Ha!” She shook her head. “He’s been going deaf since we got married. Look, Noteworthy, I adore my husband. I would never do anything to break his heart. Nopony can know about this, and nopony’ll know about Rainbow Dash.”

“You’re wrong about that,” I say, clenching my jaw. “I don’t like Rainbow Dash.”

“Clearly.” She winks. “I think it’s time you get going, Noteworthy. You really have been a big help. Carrot’s in for a treat this afternoon.”

I cough. “Yeah. Yeah, good. That’s… good. That’s what I want.” My blinks are coming too fast. “That’s all I want.”

Mrs. Cake is still smiling, but something else flashes behind her eyes. “Y’know, dearie… what you just said, about helping good mares feel the way they ought to?”

I nod furiously. “Yes, yes, exactly. Mares can feel so much, but they don’t get to because stallions are all―”

She raises a hoof to silence me. “I have a request, hon.”

I raise an eyebrow in turn. “Huh?”

The blue hoof rises even higher, pointing over our heads. “If I understand right, you’re doing this with lotsa mares, right?”

I shiver. “Don’t… don’t tell anypony, okay?”

“I won’t, dearie! Why would I?” Her hoof jabs at the ceiling. “If you’re any good at this, though, I have a request for ya.”

My eyes follow her gesture. “What do you mean?”

“Pinkie Pie hasn’t been herself lately,” Mrs. Cake says. “Would you mind trying to cheer her up? However you know how.”

My jaw drops. “Missus Cake, I… I-I-I don’t think it works like that.” My eyes scan the kitchen for an escape. “Besides, Pinkie Pie has never struck me as the, uh… as that type.”

“Just go up and see her, won’tcha, dearie?” Her chubby cheeks squish in a smile and she tosses the soiled towel into a nearby hamper. “It doesn’t have to have anything to do with making mares feel and all that. She likes making new friends. While you’re here, just go up and give her a visit, hmm?” She looks at the floor. “She hasn’t come out of her room for a quite a while, and that’s very unusual for Pinkie. I’d appreciate the help, hon, but you’re free to go if you wanna.”

The conversation is suddenly over, and Mrs. Cake checks a loaf in the oven as if I’m not even here. I get the message.

I rub my eyes with my cleanest hoof and sigh. Against my better judgment, I slowly climb the stairs to Sugarcube Corner’s upper floor. I’ve never had a conversation with Pinkie Pie that lasted more than ten seconds, and I very much doubt today will be any different.

But it’s the least I can do for poor Mrs. Cake.

Author's Note

Coming Soon: Pinkie Pie