Irony's Tale

"Dust, no more detours, okay? We're almost to Iowa now and I don't want to stop until we get there. We're already a day later than we planned. Okay?" I grumble to Lightning Dust after our latest pit stop, at her insistence, lamenting all the lost time.

"Hey, when a girl's gotta pee, a girl's gotta pee!" she replies, licking the cheese dust that was the real reason for our most recent delay from her lips.

It's not really her fault we've taken so long. It was Mindy's side-quest. And of course Moon Shadow's insistence that we help every pony that we can, whether they might want it or not... I sigh, knowing that it had been a worthwhile venture, accounting for our extra passenger. I'm just glad that Gold Dust decided to come with us, so that it wasn't a total waste of time.

"Let's make some miles," I state, mashing my booted hoof down to the floor. My beautiful car lets out a loud growl as she tears down the asphalt.

* * *

"That... is total chaos..." Dust states quietly as we come into sight of the farm.

"Dust, I think we should have gathered everypony at your place," I whisper.

The entire area is overrun with ponies. There doesn't seem to be any sort of rhyme or reason to what they're doing.

Shaking my head at the mayhem, I take the plunge and lead the way to find somepony in charge.

"How do we find somepony in charge? Do you see anyone you know?" I ask Dust as I peer back and forth, looking for anypony I recognize from the show or that I have memory of.

Dust points a hoof off to our left, "I think I just saw Twilight's mom over there. Maybe she'll know where her daughter is?"

"Probably a better bet than just asking random ponies, I'm sure," Moon Shadow states dryly. Lightning Flash and Trixie nod in agreement.

We arrow our way toward the barn that Dust pointed out, where we spot Miss Cheerilee, the school teacher from the show.

Catching her attention, I ask if she saw Twilight Velvet around there.

"Umm, I think I saw her a couple minutes ago, but I don't know which way she went," she replies, scratching her chin with a hoof. "You might ask one of the Cutie Mark Crusaders, they might know where she's at. I see Apple Bloom right over there."

I put a hoof on Cheerilee's shoulder to stop her from leaving us just yet, "Actually, do you know where we can find the Mane Six? That's who we're really looking for."

"They're probably up at the house. I haven't seen them yet today, unfortunately," she pauses for a moment, "If you find them, would you tell them we need more blankets, or towels, or something for ponies to wrap up in at night? We can't find any more."

I nod in reply and turn toward the house.

So focused am I on my destination that Moon Shadow and I reach the porch before I realize we've lost the rest of our group.

"Where'd Dust, Flash, and Trixie go?" I ask Moon.

"I'm pretty sure that Flash and Trixie nipped around back of the barn for some alone time... and I think Lightning Dust saw an old friend," she points to where Dust has tackled a harried looking Rainbow Dash.

"Well, that answers where at least one of the Six are," I say, turning to look up at the house. It's time to face the Princess, I tell myself, a twitter of fear running through my heart, no turning back now...

"Irony, are you sure that you're ready for this?" Moon asks me, nuzzling her way into my throat.

"Honestly? No, not really."

"What are you worried about?"

"I don't know. I'm sure I'm just being silly," I shake my head, wishing I could as easily shake off my feeling of dread.

"It might help if you talk it through with me. I'd be glad to be your sounding board," she rubs her muzzle against mine.

"Well, what if she doesn't remember me at all? Or, worse, what if she thinks I'm lying? I mean, would you just automatically believe some random pony that claimed to have been your bodyguard before this all went down? Even if she does remember me, what if she's upset that I didn't protect her from Discord's predation? What if she blames me for letting this happen? I mean, I was supposed to protect her, not disappear!"

Moon puts her hoof gently against my snout to dam the flow of words, "Other than being worried that she won't remember you, those are all very unlikely problems. If Twilight is at all how she was in the show, she wouldn't, no.... couldn't think that of you. How could anyone expect you to stop Discord? He's damn near like a god!"

"But--"

"No buts! If she doesn't remember you, then you'll just have to refresh her memory with what you remember. If any of the rest happen, then she's not at all the Princess she used to be, and therefore not worthy of your loyalty."

"I... I...--"

"No. If she questions your loyalty in this matter, then she is not worthy. If she isn't worthy of your loyalty, you will come back to Lightning Dust and I, and we shall do what we all think is best. Just as we have done so far. Right or wrong, that is how it must be," Moon Shadow states, her piercing gaze boring into my own.

I nod mutely, realizing that she is right. In any case, I can't let my fears rule me.

Steeling myself, I lead the way into the farm house. Upon entering the house, we spy Lightning Dust exiting what looks like a study of sorts. I must have dithered longer than I thought... or Dust is picking up traits from Mindy... Now there's a scary thought, I snort back a grim laugh at my mind's meanderings. Anything to keep me from thinking about what is ahead.

Dust stops to speak with us for a moment, letting us know that she just finished talking with the Princess. She seems a bit distracted and wanders off shortly after stopping to speak with us.

Giving Moon one last nuzzle, I straighten my shoulders and knock firmly on the study door.

***

Exiting the study after my meeting with Twilight, I stumble over to Moon Shadow and bury my muzzle in her mane. My breath hitches in and out rapidly. My head is a whirl of conflicting emotions.

Wrapping an arm around me, Shadow asks, "What is it? What happened?"

“She didn’t remember me.” I sob into her mane as I hug her tightly.

I feel her stiffen in my grasp, “What?” She says flatly.

The floodgates have opened, “She barely remembers anything from Equestria. Just bits and pieces, just like us. But I thought that she would remember me. I stood by her side from before she became an alicorn. Most of my memories are of times with her. The best she could say was she remembered having some kind of bodyguard that was assigned to her by Celestia. But anything past that, she didn’t remember.”

She pulls me tighter, “You can’t blame her, Irony. You had an advantage in this, your memories from before you went to Equestria were untouched by Discord’s spell. You were able to use them as a springboard to remember what you can of Equestria. Perhaps in time, she will remember how much you meant to her. In the mean-time, let’s find the other ponies around here. I doubt any will remember us, though I’ve seen ponies from all over Equestria, not just Ponyville and Canterlot.”

I sniff, “Yeah, I didn’t know many ponies other than the guards.”

She turns to walk through the living room, quite a few ponies are resting in there, though I remember a few I’ve seen in the background of the show, though in the spring warmth, the house is getting uncomfortably warm for me. Air conditioning simply isn’t keeping up with everypony walking in and out, the doors rarely close. Moon joins me as I make my way outside. I watch Apple Bloom walk past, in deep conversation with Applejack. I’ve got to stop for a moment and look around. Only for a moment did I shift to show Twilight, I’ve been on four hooves the entire day. I lean up against Moon. “Wow.”

She nuzzles my cheek, “What?”

“Look at them.” Dozens of ponies are singing as they work in the barn, trying to get the place habitable for the night. Some are greeting new arrivals, while everything is busy, it’s not really chaotic. They are trying to make things organized, they are trying to turn chaos into order. “I can see why Discord chose these ponies to send here.” At her questioning look, I point. “Look, they are refugees, displaced from their homes, from their lives. But what are they doing? The same thing Dust is, making do with the situation, and turning chaos into order. They are building harmony where they are.” I point up. “Nearly everypony here wants to go home, back to Equestria, but while here, they are following their cutie marks. Even the pegasi are moving clouds around, making it so the sun doesn’t beat down too hard. Organizing places for the ponies to rest and relax. But they are also industrious. This farm isn’t very big, but even back in Montana. They are harmonious.”

Moon Shadow looks around, blinking slowly, then she looks at me, “So that’s why Discord did what he did.” She murmurs softly, then her horn lights, a snarl appearing on her face as she takes a few steps back.

Alarmed, I turn and look, the changeling queen herself, Chrysalis, is hurrying in our direction. I shift quickly and pick up the bug by her neck, squeezing hard enough to choke off most of her air supply, I bring her flailing body up to my level, “I would have thought Discord would have left you in Equestria, to help make things miserable for the ponies left behind.”

Her eyes are wide, looking at me. I bring her closer, “You sent your swarm after Twilight, you caused her to be injured. Why in the hell would you be here?”

She tries to bat at my hand, her horn glows green, causing me to squeeze tighter. She quickly abandons the attempt to use magic. I have no idea how much she remembers from Equestria. She tries to speak, though my grip on her throat prevents it.

“Irony, ease off. She’s trying to speak.” Moon says.

I bring her down enough for her rear hooves to touch the ground and lessen my grip, the rage I had felt on seeing her starting to abate. Though the memories of changelings pouring into the map room, Twilight reared up behind me as we both fight for our lives against the horde, are just as vivid. It wasn’t long before Discord that it had happened.

“Hrk…He banished…me, just like…hic…the rest.” The evil queen struggles out.

“Why would he do that?” I snarl.

She bats at my hand again, though her breathing is becoming more normal, “That was…another life. I remember some of what I did then.” She looks at me, “I just want to go home.”

“What if you can’t get home, what if none of us can get home?”

“I don’t know what I would do then!” She moans, the earnestness in her voice getting me to loosen my grip on her a little bit more, she looks up at me, “I remember you. You were with the Princess.”

I nod, “When your horde attacked Ponyville.”

She smiles, those sharp teeth causing me to squeeze down a bit harder, “Okay, okay, I’m not trying to fight here. But I know the humans won’t accept me at all. My body is producing eggs faster than I know what to do with them. I need to find a way home.

I squeeze down harder, “I can make that problem go away.”

Moon Shadow puts a hoof against my side, “Irony, she’s a refugee. Just like us.” I look down at Moon, her horn is quiet, she now looks peaceful, “Love, she is not the same changeling she was then. She deserves forgiveness.”

“You were in just as much danger as Twilight or I.”

“I know that. But that was before Discord. We have one enemy here, and that’s the master of Chaos, if she wants to help with that fight, we should let her. Her magic may be of use.”

I look down at the changeling in my grip, it would be so easy, just squeeze until she’s dead. I look at my hand, the grip around her throat, finally I release her. She stumbles back, her hooves going to her throat, “Damn, I knew you were strong.” She croaks.

I relax onto four hooves, “You turn on the mane six, you turn on any pony. You will see exactly how strong I am.”

She runs her hooves along where my grip was, then gulps, “Shining Armor and I have come to agreements on it. You’ll not have me as an adversary.”

I turn away from the changeling, there are a lot of ponies here, and not much time before sundown.
***

“You are crazy, you know that?” The human says.

The pegasus nearly prances in place, his coat was a very dark purple, nearly black, offset by his purple hooves. His cutie mark, a heart with flames. He tosses his black and striped blue mane, “Mike, I know there are more ponies out there. I need to help find them. I told you about the princess coming into my dream. Saying I would know the truth in the skies. They had a sonic rainboom the other day. There are a lot of ponies here.”

The old man stands up, walking past the laptop computer, “You’ve always been better with computers than I have. You sure you’ve found some ponies?”

The stallion nods, “There are dozens. I know of one group that have holed up in an apartment in DC. They have one pegasus who barely can fly. So they are subsisting on food delivery, and whatever she can find for them. They don’t have enough resources to survive for much longer.”

“But bringing them out here? They are likely city folk, they wouldn’t know the first thing about living in the country.”

“It’s safer than the city, too many humans out there. I know that they need help.” He looks back at his friend, “I’ve got to help them.”

“You said you were in the guard back in Equestria?”

The pegasus puts a hoof to his head, “I don’t remember much, but I do remember one thing, the Night Guard. Dedicated to the Princess of the Night. We have as much responsibility to help the ponies as any other Guard.” He stops for a moment then moves over to his friend, his hooves clopping on the tile floor. He rears up and hugs the human, “You’ve known me since I was a child. You knew I was different than most. You accepted me as I went through this change. You’ve listened to everything I’ve been able to dredge up about Equestria. Hell, you’ve watched the show with me. Trust me on this. Ponies out there need help. And I’m going to help them.”

As he releases the stallion, he watches his young friend trot out into the night, nearly disappearing once leaving the pool of light around the front door. The moon is low in the sky and for a moment, the pegasus is silhouetted against the moon, winging his way towards the capitol of the nation. “Safe skies, my friend.” He murmurs softly.

***

Night has fallen, most of the ponies are sleeping in the big barn. The communal nature of the ponies have had them pushing cots and beds together, and the ponies are sleeping nearly intertwined with each other. Taking comfort in the ponies around them. Though a few unicorns and pegasi are moving around. It’s past midnight, and I haven’t seen Dust in hours. Her phone is on, but every call goes to voice mail. Moon Shadow as prevailed upon me to not continue blowing up her phone. She will respond when she’s ready. Moon Shadow has retired with Trixie and Flash into the car. As I walk by the front gate, more arrivals stumble in. This time, three earth ponies and a unicorn foal have made the trek to the farm. They need to find the way home, and soon. If they don’t, I’m going to have to talk to Dust to encourage a lot of those ponies to come to Montana with us. I don’t have to do anything, since two ponies that have been waiting for more stragglers greet the new ponies and direct them where to go. I smile as I continue my rounds. The farm here in Iowa is quite remote. The ponies patrolling are more of a formality than a necessity. But Twilight did agree that vigilance would be required. Discord won all those years ago because we were complacent. Given our adventures so far, humans could be easily as dangerous.

“Irony!” I know that voice, I turn around and look. Dust is landing, Mindy on her back. “Discord, he’s in the nations capital.”

I shake my head, “No, he’s in Equestria.”

Mindy bounces off of Dust, pronking in place, “He had to have left a part of him here. Knowing his spell wouldn’t last forever. Remember, five score divided by four. Well, that remnant of Discord is in DC, he’s a senator. And he’s the one running for President.”

I find my eyebrows rising, “Corddis?”

She nods, “Cord…Dis, Discord. Simple name play, amazing we didn’t recognize him before that.”

I snort, “Until less than a month ago, we had no idea Discord even existed.”

Dust growls, “And with everything going on, the world trying to tear itself apart even before the ponies changed. He has to be behind it.”

I look at both of them, “And if we can defeat him, we can make the entire world maybe take a step or two back from the brink?”

They both nod, I gallop towards my car, “There’s no time to lose, then!”