Chapters The Great Equestrian Journey
PART ONE: SENSING
And finally, one thousand years after faceplanting on a huge lump of rock, I get to experience something else that barely passes as exciting.
DEATH .
Not exciting, now that I think of it.
Okay, maybe exciting. It's as fun as getting moon dust all over the armor that you did so much for, or watching someone struggling to breathe in front of you. It's really fun, actually. It's even as fun as getting pummeled by the Elements-
I get off topic a lot now. Side effect.
Okay, maybe I changed the topic just to avoid talking about them .
Another topic: Celestia is a really bad hider. I would choke on her name if I weren't thinking it.
Seriously. She comes all the way to the Everfree-the Everfree -just to try her luck at tackling me. Which isn't okay. Actually, it kind of is, since I knew. I'd heard the bushes, the flutter of wings. I'd trained myself to pick up all sorts of sounds.
Although my eyesight is worse now. Which was a factor of me getting caught, since-
Wait. Did I...yes, I did get caught.
I can't really remember. I mean, I can remember the thing's face when it-he, rather-saw me, or when he shuddered and died right there. Yessir, everyone can remember those kinds of moments clearly. But the other stuff is a jumble. I'm trying to sort it out, but right now I'm still out. And by out, I mean not awake. As in knocked out.
Thankfully, I have what I call the Dreamscape. So I can replay the whole thing again in the form of a dream.
At the crunching of leaves, I was ready. At the hoofsteps, I was off, sprinting and dodging. And creating a whole lot of noise.
Eyesight suddenly failed me again.
I smacked into a tree.
I cried out as the bark rubbed against my coat. My helmet nearly fell off. On instinct, I whacked it back into place and got up to run again. I had only recovered my helmet and chestplate, meaning anyone could dive for my legs. I had to keep running. I had to keep from throwing up.
Everything was spinning. I stumbled into a clearing and tried to sprint, but my stomach leaped and I nearly tripped.
The hoofsteps! They were closer!
I went into a full panic mode. I ran again, while keeping what little I had to eat down.
My shoulder kept hitting trees. I couldn't even tell they were trees; everything was so blurry.
Finally...darkness. Hello, friend. I scampered into the shade, pressing myself against something. Cool and...
Slimy .
I shivered and stepped away. That's when I realized where I was: a cave.
That's also when I saw it .
It was in the middle of the cave, laying there, helpless. It heard me panting and looked up at me.
There was terror in its eyes. Normally I would appreciate that terror, but I was in a really urgent hurry-up mood. I noticed that its entire face all scrunched up in pain. Or wrinkling it's nose. Which I didn't appreciate, but I didn't have time to not appreciate things.
It was awkward there for a moment. It didn't expect me to be there and I didn't expect it to be there. I couldn't even see it. I tried making it through all the blurred colors, but then I realized the all those blurred colors were it .
Indeed, it was a bizarre sight. First of all, it's eyes were large, deep dark orange-with no pupil. So I wasn't the only one in the Creepy Eyes Club. Its coat was light purple and it's wings were just glittery. I half-expected all of the little foals in the world to rush in and cling to it.
It was awkward. Then I broke the silence: "I think I'll go now."
I turned to continue my run for life, but I heard a voice saying, "No."
It could speak! And it sounded like a he.
I looked behind me and turned back to him. He wasn't scared of me. Why? I had never seen him before. So he probably didn't know me.
He muttered something. I really wanted to turn away now, but something-maybe it was his voice or extremely thin figure-kept me rooted.
"The disease," he said.
The disease?
Was there something I didn't know about? Of course I wouldn't have heard. Which is why I wanted to hear it from him.
"I'm weak." Like that wasn't obvious.
I took a deep breath, trying to quell the panic that kept screaming at me to run. I opened my mouth to speak, but he interrupted:
"I'm it's first victim."
Then he shivered and collapsed.
I was frozen, watching as he began to hyperventilate. I felt like doing that too. I saw, horrified, someone, one pony or something, out of hundreds of thousands, taking his very last breath.
"There she is ."
I barely had time to turn around before something hit me over the head.
Author's Note
First time publishing a story on here...it's also on Wattpad, so be sure to check it out!
The Great Equestrian Journey
Darn alarm clock.
My hoof slams on the SNOOZE button, my eyes shut tight. Sleep, I've come to discover, is a beautiful thing. In the Hive, there was no time for sleep. Just fighting and teasing and pranks abound.
Olive would call it a day in the office.
I fall back into that peaceful slumber, and I'm awaken again by the dragon form of an alarm clock. He pries my lids open, and I catch the blurred face of Spike beside the bed.
"No sleeping in," he says.
I groan, but it evolves into a chuckle. I shift the covers over my head so he can't see the smile erupting across my face.
A pair of claws try to snatch away the blanket, and I try pinning it with my hoof, but to no avail. Spike is relentless.
He's been relentless from the first day we met.
Relentless in friendship
and determination
and all of his quirks.
That's exactly what makes me give into him now. You can't stop Spike, especially when you have such a bond with him. Although little, he has a huge personality.
He stands by my bedside, smirking. "Kings don't sleep in."
I chuckle-groan again. "I'm not a king."
Spike cocks his head, wearing a joking grin. "Or are you just not ready?" He leans up and taps my antlers. "C'mon, sleepyhead."
With a sigh and a smile, I sit up, stretch a bit, and then get out of bed. Spike likes the idea of me being a ruler, and likes to tease me about it. He even sets my alarm clock, but I don't know how to undo the alarm. The only button I know is SNOOZE.
I wander after him into the kitchen, where a nice aroma fills the air. "Muffins?" I ask him.
Spike nods. He loves cooking for some reason. It's a hobby we've both come to love, but today I let him do it all. You just can't ruin his bravado.
I sit at the table and look out the window. Attempts were made to renovate the Hive, but meanwhile, some changelings resorted to living elsewhere in Equestria. There are teams of builders at the Hive, and it's all being manned by Olive, the co-captain of the Changeling Guard.
Me? I couldn't stay there. I may be a ruler
but I'm not ready
and the whole
stinking, rotten place
stings of Chrysalis .
It's better out here, in a cabin in the Appleachians, than in a place that once feared a coward.
Or so I think she's a coward.
Or maybe it's me.
Olive, she was my only companion in the pre-transformed Hive, the closest thing to friend. She had the typical changeling snark, the fierce determination, and strong opinions. She wasn't weak, either. She became the first female Captain of the Guard, before my brother took over, in a place that was mostly male. It was a strong feat, and I admired her for it.
After the reformation, she had come up to me and told me I could count on her to keep order while I took a break. She knew me well enough to know I was 'so obviously insecure that it was so sickly cute'. At the time I laughed.
Now I know
my insecurities
say the truth.
Spike, though...Spike keeps my sanity.
The day after he introduced me to the Crystal Empire, back when I was Old Thorax, back when nothing was wrong,
I was safe, I should've known that,
I woke up from a nightmare screaming.
It was about Chry-her .
Spike, Twilight, and the pony who introduced herself as Starlight were staying the night. I knew they were keeping an eye on me, even though they said they wanted to spend more time with Flurry Heart. Spike had chosen to stay in the guest room with me. It was strange, lying in a bed, wrapped with blankets and not a cocoon, while Spike snored on the rug.
When I woke up screaming, it hit me how unfamiliar this was. And I couldn't stop the tears.
Spike had jumped up, and soon he had crawled on the bed with me and shook my shoulders. I was panicking. I had trouble breathing for a while.
And then Spike suggested we take a walk. So we did. We tiptoed out the door, past half-asleep guards until we finally reached an empty hall. The moonlight was streaming in through the ten-meter windows that lined the hall on one side. Spike and I sat in the middle of the glow. I let the moon captivate me. It was silent for a while.
Then Spike told me a story. It was about two sisters, inseparable, who ruled Equestria since long ago. Really long. A few millennia. They stored the very things that held the balance of Equestria: the Elements of Harmony.
One of them controlled the sun; the other the moon. Ponies enjoyed the warmth and shine of the sun, but although the night let the soft glow of the moon and stars show, they slept through it. The sister that controlled the moon became jealous, jealous of the attention the sun, her sister, was getting, how ponies never noticed the moon.
So in a rage, she adopted a new persona and staged a coup. Tried to. Her sister struggled to reason, and in the end, the sun princess did the only thing she could.
The moon princess was blasted to the moon
and that was where Spike paused. And I thought.
If she ever looked down on Equestria she would see a beautiful blend of blues and greens and browns
and the sunshine glinting off the waves
and the lights that sprouted up in the night
and I thought
did she miss it all?
I asked Spike why he told me that story, and he shrugged. "I just wanted to share something."
It was quiet for a bit longer, and I felt sleep threatening to take over. That moment, right there, was the very first time I was able to let go. Let go with Spike at my side. My anchor.
My string of memories is interrupted when the oven goes off. Spike takes out a tray of muffins and sets it on the table. I notice the complete lack of a mitt. But all it takes for him is to wring his claws in the air and blow on them, and then he sits down across from me.
The Spike I knew before her second invasion wasn't so reckless, more scared of his own shadow. But around me, he likes to act tough. I guess he's trying to look cool. But I told him that he didn't have to try to be cool with me, and he gave me this look that said what are you talking about ? For all I know, he's going through a personality change.
He looks at me with his usual grin, but there's something else to it now. Do I see the old Spike shining through? No-the grin turns into a grimace.
He pushes a scroll towards me. "I actually woke you up for this."
From the look on his face, this letter doesn't hold good news. Spike frowns, waiting.
I open it, skim it. It's pretty long, something about-
A disease. Lotus.
Lotus was one of the changelings that moved across Equestria. He was fascinated with nature, and there was no better place to study strange plants than the Everfree. Last I heard, he was exploring caves for wildlife. I talked to him once or twice. He had dreams of becoming a scientist. He had the smarts, the ability to make and read graphs. He was intelligent. He could've been the first changeling scientist.
Could've.
Now he's dead.
I take a deep breath. It's been only two months since the reformation, and even before that there were no deaths. Now there are.
And, even scarier, it's via a disease we don't know.
My first thought is her .
The Great Equestrian Journey
I have no idea how I got here.
I know where I am, the caves beneath Canterlot. I know that I've been walking aimlessly for about an hour now, taking random turns. I don't know how many lefts or rights. I've come to a straight passage now.
The thought that keeps echoing through my mind is turn back and find that wretched thing .
But I don't. For some reason, I don't. I have no intention of facing anyone soon. Besides, my return should be a long time in the future, where there's no suspicion still.
But what if that thing totally changes my kingdom? Takes over as king?
Still, I walk.
I don't know what's wrong with me. What is keeping me walking away from my destiny, keeping me from tearing his head off?
Maybe saving my kingdom is hopeless. Maybe I need to find Cadance and Shine Whoever and kill them.
Maybe it's rage making me walk. Okay. From now on, I'm taking note of how many turns I take. I just need to walk until I sustain my anger. And wait. Maybe another week. No, scratch that.
I can't wait.
I turn the other way and adrenaline surges me forward. I'm going back. I'm going to kill Starlight instead.
That's right. I'm doing it.
I break into a sprint, unleashing all my anger and depression into one mean storm. As I charge down the passage, I let out a scream. And I just lose it.
I crack up.
I don't know why. I don't know crap about things besides the fact that I am very lost and very angry and possibly turning insane.
It takes forever to get over the sudden laughter attack, and when I'm finally done, I think I've laughed everything out. This makes me laugh more. Everything's funny. I'm kneeling, tears in the corner of my eyes. I think of Thorax and giggle.
Why am I even laughing?
So many questions.
I get back up, and the feelings from before the Laughter War sink back in. I hate it. I hate hate. Haha.
I've truly gone mad.
Forget it. Let's just focus on getting out of here. My cheeks hurt, I'm feeling like I had a hangover, and I need to accomplish something.
So I go straight back. And I go.
It takes forever. I find nothing, no turns. Did I take a turn somewhere and forget? How am I lost again? There has to be a fork somewhere. I think I remember a clearing, or whatever you call them when you're in a cave.
I experience what they call loneliness. Crap. I'm in trouble. Guards are probably down here, they'll find me, I won't kill Tho -
The thing , I mean.
_____
Yep. I'm dirt.
Oh nononono. I have been walking for what feels like hours . Hours on end. I. Need. A. Break.
I think of the thing, and hate flares up in me again. It's his fault! He chased me here. He turned my own species away from me. Normally, this would fuel me, but my legs and head ache so much that I finally lean against a wall.
I'm shaking with anger right now. I am about to explode. Why me? I should be the one watching over the changelings-my changelings-not some amateur. I seethe, breathing out angry sighs through gritted teeth.
A flicker catches my eye.
It's up ahead. It's civilization . Somebody is down here and they started a fire. I'll just shift into a pony and ask them the way out, posing as an explorer. Easy.
I'm propelled to my hooves and onward by this newfound hope. And I'm nearing it, I've shifted-
When the flicker disappears.
"No," I whisper. I yell, "Wait!"
No reply. I break into a run.
It's sudden when I break into a wide room with three tunnels. Great.
I skid to a stop. Choose. Where was the flicker? Was it more to the...I drop the disguise, discouraged.
Can't give up. I take a wild guess and choose the farthest right. Of course. The flicker was definitely over here. Definitely, right?
I tentatively enter the tunnel. No, this is stupid. I should abandon hope. No, I shouldn't, if this happens to be where the flicker is-
WHY AM I THINKING SO MUCH?!
Yup. I'm mad.
I continue down the tunnel. Now I get more and more convinced that this is dumb. But, wait; there's something different in the air. Have I entered new territory?
Yes . I enter a room, about as wide as it is tall. In front of me is a platform spitting out of another tunnel ten meters above my head. I just have to find a way to get up there. I look around the room for any rocks I can push. There's a medium-sized one by the corner. I rush over and nudge it a little.
With a rough groan, it moves. I keep on pushing. Freedom is here. Soon enough, the rock is underneath the platform's ledge, my shoulder burning from rubbing against the rock. It's not quite tall enough, but I can probably pull myself up with my front hooves.
I stand back for a moment to rest, wondering why I'm dumb enough to not have used magic. If I had, this would have been resolved a whole lot easier.
And then it happens.
The flicker catches my eye again. I try to summon my disguise, but I can't. Because now I know who's behind that flicker.
She emerges onto the platform, tall and too familiar-no . I can't. I'm rooted to the ground, I can't do anything.
She carries the torch with her magic. She leans it against the wall and surveys the room. For a moment, I think she doesn't see me.
Now she does. Why didn't I just change? I try to think of ways to get out of this, but her name keeps popping up.
She looks at me with astonishment, I look at her the same way.
Then she turns to run. And stumbles.
And now she's grappling, struggling to stay on the platform-
Cadance falls onto the rock I pushed, hitting it with her back. She releases an audible gasp. I cringe, both at that and the sight of her.
She tumbles off the rock and hits the ground with a THUD .
If you could hear my shock, it would sound like an earthquake.
My eyes are frozen wide, fixed on her. My first thought: Cadance. Is. Here . My second thought: she's not opening her eyes.
I could end it all now. I could kill her. Better yet, I could keep her prisoner. It will would only take draining her emotion while she's knocked out. The last option seems fun; it's best when the victim can wake up to struggle to no avail. I consider dragging her back where I came.
So I trot towards her, get ready to feed.
I see her twitch .
Never had I been scared of a sleeping Cadance.
Get it together. You're a queen.
So I do get it together. And it's when I'm a step from her and my guard lets down when she cocks open one eye and says, "I wouldn't do that if I were you."
The Great Equestrian Journey
I see her too.
I turn away to run, but something goes wrong. Is it the way I turned? Did my hoof twist? I don't know.
Because, the next thing I know, I'm falling. It's a short fall, but when I make impact it's stunning. I roll of off whatever I landed on, meet the ground, my back and head already sore.
THUD .
...
I don't think Chrysalis realizes it, but she's muttering my name. Reality slowly comes back into focus. It's a bit foggy. I hear her first, then my eyes open just a sliver. Based on her position, I was only out for a moment.
Next comes the pain. It explodes through my skull, and my spine feels like it's being crushed. I begin to worry that I'm paralyzed. I twitch my leg to see, and Chrysalis gasps.
She's walking towards me. I know what she's about to do. And, suddenly, the perfect revenge seems a moment away.
What happened to Cadance? Easy, I'm a changeling. Kidding. I'm just tired of being a damsel in distress. And I want to put Chrysalis in her place myself. I don't need my knight in shining armor. I sustain a giggle.
It takes some guts to do it, but I crack open an eye-look at her directly in the eye-and say, "I wouldn't do that if I were you."
Chrysalis' reaction is timeless. She stumbles back, confusion etched in her face, sputtering out random syllabes. "Wha-I-"
I pull myself up with a non-characteristic groan of annoyance. I can't help it, okay? I woke up this morning after yet another Chrysalis nightmare and I'm angry. Fed up. If anyone were to put her in her place, it should be me. I was her first victim.
My back is sore where I hit it, so I roll my shoulders and take my time pulling myself into a sitting position. It isn't like Chrysalis would do anything anyway. For all I know, she's as flexible as a tree right now.
It's silent and quite awkward for a moment, and something else sinks in. It's just Chrysalis and I, and she's likely pretty mad. I let no one know I'm down here. Shining gets so anxious whenever I go out by myself, so I told him I was just going for a walk in the park.
And Flurry . Can't forget Flurry. And I'm in pain and no one knows where I am and Chrysalis-
Get it together , I tell myself.
I thought I could stand up to her. I really did. I am so stupid .
Suddenly, being a damsel in distress seems a lot more fitting. Grr. This-my panic, my dramatics-is a part of me I'll never get rid of. I feel hopeless, like both times Chrysalis kidnapped me.
I can't let it show, though. So I break the silence with a sweet "Hi there."
Chrysalis is even more dumbfounded. She's backed up from me, so she's almost swallowed up by the tunnel behind her. I force a giggle. She flinches.
Huh. Looks like Chrysalis has changed too. More skittish. I decide to let her say something. "Go ahead. Say something."
What comes out of her mouth is: "What-how-Cad-"
She takes a deep breath and composes herself. Here's the Chrysalis I know. And this Chrysalis is much scarier. I flash back to my other encounters with her, and it doesn't leave a good effect. I feel stupid again. I try to swallow my terror and look her in the eyes.
She turns away, mumbling something. I cock my head cutely, asking, "What was that?"
She says it a bit louder, but I still can't make it out. She repeats it when I don't respond. "This is bad."
"Thanks for stating the obvious." I can't keep the snark from my voice.
Chrysalis whirls back towards me. "What's...wrong with you?"
I shrug innocently. "I've been through a lot."
She blinks, and rage enters her face. I don't even know what level of fear to feel anymore. Believe me, I've felt all levels. She replies with "Don't remind me."
"Of my inevitable doom?" I can't help it. I'm tired of being at a villian's mercy. I want to dare her to do something , because I don't just want to fight back. I want to be completely bulletproof.
Chrysalis frowns, but then she realizes what I meant. But instead of coming forth to feed on me, she asks a single, shocking question. "Are you Cadance?"
Thing is, I don't know either. Am I a loving, bubbly princess? Or a warrior? Am I picture-perfect? Or have I had enough?
I feel like I'm stuck between the two, but I know inside I'm still me . Just physically. So I nod, and somehow that single movement makes me tired.
It's silent again, and this time I don't start the conversation.
"No way."
"None of your-excuse me, Thorax's changelings-want to face you at all." She flinches at Thorax's name.
"But how come you do?" Her voice is a bit louder, a bit shakier with anger. And I'm angry too. Does everyone want me to just shrink back until a prince comes to my rescue?
I sound bitter. "Because I'm tired of being helpless and having everybody else fight my fight."
Chrysalis sits, sighing. She seems...defeated . "Want to just ignore each other?"
My answer says it all. "That sounds great."
That's when the rumbling starts.
The Great Equestrian Journey
The wonderful bliss of sleep still tugs at me, but it's too late. My eyes open.
I hate waking up.
I also hate waking up under unfamiliar white sheets in an unfamiliar white room with an unfamiliar window(not white). The stupid sun is thankfully blocked by a curtain of a predictable color. I'm under these warm, soothing sheets, and they make me really want to go back to sleep--but I can't. Wherever Celestia has taken me, I need to escape.
So I kick back the covers, and the whiteness of the room nearly blinds me. Heh, Celestia was smart. I'm a jet-black figure against a pale setting. Can't exactly hide anywhere.
Already my senses have shifted from 'groggy' to 'let's get out of here real fast or we'll be sorry'. I try listening. No hoofsteps, no talking. Celestia must want to talk to me, so I figure there's a door. She probably won't use her magic because this place must deflect magic if it's keeping someone like me.
And yes, ponies like me embrace who they are. You're very lucky if you lie to yourself instead of having the face the stone-hard truth, which, on very rare occasions, includes being a criminal who has possessed a royal figure.
There must be a door. I climb out of the bed--I notice right away that it's comfier than a dungeon bed--and start at the wall adjacent from it, running my hoof along the wall to find any cracks. No success on the first half. I start on the second half.
And that's when I finally not just feel, but see . I see that I have no armor on my hoof. No armor at all, actually. Great, I have no way to--
The second half of the wall swings open, making me stagger back.
I was going to say defend myself.
Standing there in the doorway is a familiar white figure. Her.
Her name rings through my head. Celestia, Celestia...on and on. I was able to think steadily about her before, but now that she's here --now that she's here, she'll what? Execute me, here and now? That seems to be the only valid option.
I can't even move, much less stay calm. I never thought I'd be this terrified when I had the chance to kill her once and for all.
It's quiet. Way too quiet. Like in that cave. I wonder briefly. Was it all a dream? Then I nearly smack myself. I need to focus on me or Celestia's inevitable doom.
She's the first one to speak, saying that cliché phrase. "I see you're awake."
She takes a step in, and I have three separate reactions: my heart says tackle her, my rational half of my brain tells me to keep my current stance, and my other half of my brain tells me to RUN .
I stay put, trying to summon my death glare, but it doesn't come. I probably look stupid to her. Pathetic, easy to kill. I'm pretty sure she'll kill me. Will she? What's going on? Did I really see a purple crazy looking thing die in a cave in the middle of the Everfree? Am I already dead? What's the meaning of this? Life? Death? Is life just a million questions? How did I get so off track? What's even going on with my mind?
I'm pretty sure I'm alive. The thudding of my heart confirms that. But the rest of these questions are twirling in my head.
I need to stay calm and answer diplomatically. So I take a deep breath, not so exaggerated so Celestia can see it. She's searching with her eyes me up and down, and something in her gaze relaxes me even more. It's not hate or malice, it's...something else. Anything else, really. She's not going to kill me. That eliminates another question.
It's too silent again, so I decide to speak this time. "I...yeah."
And I mess up. Great. At least I didn't hide the disgust. Disgust at her imprisoning me like this, getting me to trust her. I bet her eyes lied. Do eyes lie?
No more questions. Please .
I re-phrase. "I'm awake and very aware of the many questions I have about this ." The this I'm talking about turns out to be about the dying thing and not in the least anything else.
Celestia knows what I'm talking about, because she nods her head and replies, "Yes, the changeling. I bet you're confused."
Changeling?
Celestia also knows about the number of questions I have right now, because she just added one more.
And one more is far too many. I find myself demanding, "What was that?"
Celestia seems even calmer than I am. "The changeling died of a rare unnamed disease."
Another question. Will there ever be a point when all the questions in Equestria have been answered? And this disease. I remember the changething mentioning a disease.
"Do you remember anything else?" Celestia asks.
And it's the pity in her voice that sets me off.
"Do I remember anything?" I exclaim. "Yeah, I remember my confusion. I remember you knocking me out--"
"That was one of my guards," Celestia says, like she's talking to a filly. I can't take this anymore.
"Knocking me out, and then waking up here like--like royalty! You're fooling me so you can stab me in the back. I know you." I'm not exactly yelling, but I'm not exactly quiet either.
She averts her eyes. "You don't know me. You don't know what's going on."
"Indeed I don't. And I need answers. Not while I'm lying in a pool of my own blood. Tell me now." And then I grate out the name in between my teeth. "Celestia ."
"Luna--"
"Don't even get me start--"
And then she interrupts with two words that make the bright walls dim, the sadness in her eyes pronounced. Time seems to slow down, but at the same time I feel this sensation like I've been going way too fast. This is the slow time that I may need.
"Luna's sick."
The Great Equestrian Journey
I watch as the shock mixed with understanding enters Nightmare Moon's face. I didn't quite expect this kind of reaction, only a harsh laugh and a sarcastic remark. But she's surprised.
More emotional than I am, even. I clearly remember trying to shake my sister awake, only to feel her searing-hot head. I thought it was just a fever, but then came the limp movements, the frequent headaches, and the blurry vision. That was when it got too far. That was when she checked into the hospital and they found out that she was sick with something else.
That was a week ago. Everything was such a whirlwind then, but now, as I remember it, it only gives me this feeling of resignation, even though my sister's state isn't yet considered grave.
I usually don't find it thankful that Nightmare interrupts me, but she does so from my memories of the past seven days. "She's...how?"
I meet her cat-like teal eyes. I hate having to pull up the facts as well. "That changeling was the first to die from the sickness Luna has."
Nightmare's voice becomes a touch frantic. "Do you know what it is?"
I thought I knew. "I thought...you were responsible for it."
Something else enters Nightmare's expression...I can't even think what it is, because it would be one of the many unpredictable things that has happened to me. But now it's too evident. It's the furrow of a brow, the intake of breath when you're accused of something you wouldn't do because...because you were once the victim. Because she knows Luna.
And she cares about Luna.
I don't know why I'm about to do this, but if Nightmare's feelings are true, it's the best thing to do. "But, judging by what the guard told me about your reaction to the changeling, you're not responsible. And that's why..." I swallow. I keep reminding myself that this is the best thing to do, this is the best thing to do, this is the best thing to do . "And that's why I'd like your help."
When she doesn't move or speak, I continue. "You witnessed firsthoof how you can die as a victim of this disease. We need all the help we can to save Luna and the other Equestrians, seeing as the disease has somehow spread to the public."
Nobody moves. The clock in my head ticks.
"I..."
Please. Please help me.
"I'm not sure."
I don't feel defeated. She said something that basically translated to 'maybe'. I just need to make that maybe a yes.
"I would really appreciate it," I reply, trying not to sound like I'm pleading. "We need all the help we can."
"And who's we?"
"Me and the team of doctors. They know about you."
Nightmare's face is blank for an instant. I can see the gears in her head turning, slowly, inch by inch. "I'll think about it."
I want to tell her to think about it hard. But she's watching me expectantly, like she's daring me to not spare her. She still hates me, even if I want Luna alive and healthy. So I back out the door.
She doesn't even make a move to come after me. I enter a code beside the door, and as it shuts, I spot her expression, sadder this time. The door shuts and locks.
_____
"And did you say pretty please ?" Discord says, pointing a pen at me. I forgot to tell Nightmare that he was eager to help.
"I did," I reply flatly.
"And she said she'd think about it. What a jerk." Discord takes a sip of his coffee--decaf.
For some unexpected reason, I want to defend her. "Not really. I'm pretty sure she will think about it hard."
Discord takes another exaggerated slurp. "She'd better."
I stare at my own coffee. I watch the cream in the dark abyss. The clock in my head has been ticking and ticking ever since talking to Nightmare. More like a bomb.
"CeCe?"
I shake my head from my thoughts. "What?"
"Have you told Luna?"
I can't believe I forgot about my own sister. Sick sister. "I told her about finding Nightmare, but not about the decision to come."
"Then go tell her!"
The cream fascinates me again. I should tell her, but I stay rooted to the chair. I have no idea what's been wrong with me these days. Actually, I do. It's tough to admit it, but I'm quite depressed, with my sister's fate looking even more grim each and every day. I find out I've been contradicting myself. I still talk about this situation a lot, yet I claim others distract me.
It's without hesitation now that I stand up and trot briskly towards the doors. "Good idea."
I push the doors open and walk out into the hall. It's then that I decide to teleport; it's quicker that way.
I'm used to the fizzy, slightly nauseous feeling of teleportation, but today, much like the past week, it feels new. I find myself outside the doors to the castle's hospital wing.
I push open the doors, and I immediately fix my eyes on the room at the end of the hall. The mare at the reception desk greets me, then goes down the hall unlocks the door to the room. I follow her and tell her thanks. I walk in to see my sister.
Luna is hooked up to what seems to be millions of tubes, but must only be a dozen. She opens her eyes just a tired, meaningless sliver, but my heart does what it usually does: breaks.
I approach her bedside, and we grab each other's hoof. With my magic, I drag over the chair and then sit down so that I'm nearly level with Luna, who's only elevated a tiny bit.
"Hey," she croaks. I smile, and my eyes water a teensy bit. At least she can still talk.
I grip her hoof tighter, like I'll squeeze some life back into her. "Hey right back."
Luna chuckles, but it turns into a few small wheezes that seem huge to me. Then she turns over with some difficulty. "Any news?"
I nod, even though the news isn't very optimistic. "Nightmare woke up. I talked to her."
"And?" I bet Luna is expecting something drastic, so I shake my head.
"She looked surprised to know that you're sick. So I..." Oh no--I haven't told Luna about my intent to recruit Nightmare to help. She'd probably be mad, at me or Nightmare. Likely, she'll be willing to rip Nightmare's head off.
Luna frowns. "So you...
I say it before I can stop myself. "Tried to get her to help."
The look Luna gives me is a mix of shock and disgust, but, thankfully, not rage. "She wants to help? But isn't she responsible for--" Luna holds up a limb with three different tubes in it "--this?"
I shake my head. "I told you, she looked surprised when she saw the changeling die. It was genuine."
"She's a liar," Luna remarks.
I nod reluctantly. "I know. But she...didn't seem to like watching that changeling die. She was so shocked she could barely fight the guards when they caught her."
Luna softens, but just a tiny bit, like she doesn't quite believe even me. "So what did she say about helping?"
"She said she will think about it."
Luna subtly rolls her eyes. "Of course she did."
"But I could see in her face that she would." I hope that's what I saw. Sadness, gears turning, shock...
And the gears seem to turn in Luna's head too. She turns to me with a particular look in her eye. "You think you could use this chance to...reform her?"
I never even thought of that, but it sounds like a great idea. Only--how will I do it? Nightmare will be resistant. And I don't want to use Luna's sickness over her.
Except she might change willingly. It's near impossible, but I've seen the way Nightmare cares about Luna; at least, the gist of it.
Changing willingly seems like the best option. I should know firsthoof. I've changed, too. So has Luna, in a dire way.
And, if we don't act fast, Equestria.
The Great Equestrian Journey
I'm still poring over the letter. It's late at night, Spike has gone home to Twilight, and that single fact
will not
let me
sleep.
Sometimes I forget how to breathe.
Chrysalis is here. She's waiting in the darkness. She's going to try and
kill me.
kill me kill me kill me.
I'd rather blow up.
I've had quite a strange fear, a fear of being there and then being gone and your blood and guts and everything in your body is all that remains but your skin is nonexistent. I've read an article about it once. It's called spontaneous combustion.
I'd hated the thought of it before. But now
Chrysalis is here
Chrysalis will find me
And I have no idea what would happen next
besides
death
and
destruction
and, oh, what if I caused it? Caused Lotus to die, cause a huge war between changelings and rebel changelings?
Death. It's part of life, somehow. And it's going to happen.
_____
I'm tossing and turning in bed, hoping I'll get a little bit of sleep tonight, hoping Spike will pull me out of bed the next morning. The alarms clock reads 12:12. Same numbers; I make a wish for Spike.
Sleep tugs at my eyes, forcing my lids to close.
When my eyes open next, it isn't Spike pulling the blinds open. Its Lotus.
Screaming, I jerk up and nearly fall out of bed. Lotus stands there smiling at me, deep orange eyes drilling into mine.
My heart thumps
thumps thumps thumps
as I foolishly approach him. He still smiles. He never smiled.
"You're alive," I gasp. I reach forward to touch him.
As soon as my hoof makes contact, his eyes melt away and behold these familiar green ones. I exhale and back up.
Chrysalis advances towards me. She's ready to pounce. I open my mouth to scream. She pounces --
I sit up in bed, gasping and sweating.
Someone is opening the blinds.
"Lo--"
"Woah," Ember says. "Chill."
I can't possibly 'chill'
if my number one enemy
wants my head.
I sigh and climb out of bed, a bit dizzy from the dream and lack of sleep.
Ember grimaces. I bet I look awful. "Get any sleep?"
"Nope."
She huffs. "Well, Spike went with Twilight on a mission."
"What mission?"
Ember's maroon eyes take on a more pitiful state. "To find a cure for the disease."
I want to tell her that the one with the cure is Chrysalis.
But Ember speaks before I can do that. "Princess Luna is sick too. Her sister just released a statement to the press."
My shoulders go rigid.
Ember notices. "Look, don't feel bad." I should. "The officials are trying to pick apart the disease. They'll find out what killed Lotus."
I really want to tell her about Chrysalis, but this is Ember. How will she believe me?
Ember nods at me to follow, then turns and heads to the kitchen. I go after her. In the kitchen, I smell something. Coffee, I think. Yes, coffee. Two steaming mugs sit on the table.
Ember immediately sits down and takes a sip. I repeat her actions and
I realize
I can't trust her
I don't know
if she's her
if she's poisoning me.
I don't realize that I'm hyperventilating until Ember's claw is rubbing my back. She wouldn't care for me this way. I meet Ember's eyes and say sorry.
"Don't say sorry," she says.
I should feel sorry. Ember went ahead to be nice and made us coffee, and my stupidness ruined all that. No. She ruined all that. "No, I really am. I'm sorry."
Ember gives me her obligatory eye roll. "You're too nice."
I am too nice. That makes me wonder how I'll ever fight anyone who comes after me.
And then I think back to when I didn't even know Ember, when I saw her offending Spike and turned into a bear to defend him. That's what I'll do. Except I'll have to be the worst friend ever and have Spike be threatened, because
only then I can get defensive
only then I can ever do anything useful
all this makes me want to puke.
This is all irrational.
Right?
I really would rather blow up.
Ember sits back down across from me, and we sip our coffee in silence. I never knew someone like Ember would need coffee; she just summons strength wherever she goes. I find it way easier to focus on that tiny little fact instead of everything else.
The Great Equestrian Journey
I'm back in the tunnel when Cadance's face changes, and the roaring in my ears say why.
Oh .
I twist my head back to see.
I need to get to Cadance's tunnel.
We both make a mad scramble towards it. Since she's lying right by the rock under the tunnel, Cadance gets on it first. No way. I'm not about to be left for dead.
Cadance is struggling to get on the platform when I reach her, getting on the rock as well, then looking behind me to see a mess of rocks and dust and chaos. No, please no.
Then something goes wrong. The rock can't support me and Cadance's weight, apparently, without rolling. I'm on the side of the direction the rock is rolling, so I go down first.
Nonononono . This is not happening. I am going to die. We are going to die, me and Cadance together.
I throw my weight behind me so the rock can't roll on me, but my leg catches Cadance and we fall together, Cadance screaming. The roaring is so loud it might as well make my ears explode. I land flat on my back, and the wind is knocked out of me, leaving my heart hammering and my lungs bursting for air. Now I know how Cadance feels.
I try to move, but I can only roll over--just to see the rocks falling from the ceiling about ten meters away. Dust clouds my vision, and I clamp my mouth and eyes shut. Beside me, I hear Cadance moving. I don't make a move to go after her. This is fate. I'm going to--
Survive?
The rumbling stops, and I pant, exhausted. Only my tunnel has caved in, and some of the rocks have spilled into the room. The dust starts to settle, and the only sound in this room is me and Cadance's labored breathing.
"Are you okay?" Cadance asks. I look over to see that she's sat up. Huh, she's kinder than she was.
For some reason, that causes me to simmer. "You think?"
Cadance rolls her eyes--another non-Cadance thing. I really wonder what's wrong with her. I think it must be a changeling who's playing a trick on me. If so, I'll wring the life out of it.
I turn towards Cadance, who's slowly rising to stand. I try to be strong instead of the weak Chrysalis that I've been. I sit up--slowly, trying very hard not to wince from the pain. "I'm going to ask again. Are you Cadance?"
Cadance stands above me, a full head taller since I'm still sitting. I try to give her my death stare as she opens her mouth to speak, but that doesn't stop her icy sarcasm. "Yeah, I'm a changeling. I'm totally capable of facing a tyrant that caused me to be the most despicable creature ever. I am so glad you're here." Her face is all rage now.
Oh, I'm all about rage. "Nice, Cadance, always knew you were such a jerk. What happened to you?"
"What happened to me?!" Cadance shoots back. "You happened. And how are you so defenseless one moment and then all--" Cadance waves a hoof in the air "--angry the next?"
I don't know why I'm so weak. Maybe it's because I'm still shocked. So I need to muster up the strength to overcome it.
But before I can come up with a witty comeback, Cadance huffs and trot towards the center of the room, blahing on and on about the fact that "You're such an undeserving idiot; but you definitely deserve what happened. You don't know the trouble you've caused me. You don't know anything about who I am. You shouldn't have a say in what I do."
She stops there, and I intervene. "I deserve being with you? Doesn't that mean--"
"You're so dumb! "
Cadance wheels around to face me, her face scrunched up and a slight twinge of red. I jump back in surprise of her suddenly loud voice.
"You just...you're dumb, you know that? Dumber than me. You don't even acknowledge that I'm taking a stand. You want me to be locked away in a tower like a damsel, do you? Well, I'm not okay with being that kind of pony now. I'm only concerned with you ." Her words become hurried and fast, so fast they literally blur together and I can only pick a few words out, but the one word that sticks with me is dumb .
I think I am dumb. Dumb not to knock her out with my magic.
Oh. Forgot. Can't use magic down here. I am dumb.
Grr . I'm going to get Cadance.
And I waste no time. I trot towards her, getting ready to feed. I can still use this kind of magic.
Cadance's face comes closer and closer in view. She stands defiantly, which makes me angrier with each step I make. How dare she defy me. I'm three steps from her...two...my revenge is right here. I light my horn.
Its when I'm a hoof from her when her limb swings back and connects with my face.
In a nutshell, it makes my head explode and every single part of my body tingles. Tears erupt into my vision. Stupid. Stupid! I am so dumb.
And Cadance certainly isn't.
The Great Equestrian Journey
Chrysalis's head snaps back, and she teeters backward. My nerves are erupting from going into contact with her jaw. The rest of me tingles, lights on fire.
I'm just done today.
Or tonight.
Who knows? Once again, it strikes me that I am very close to my death here. Do I really have the strength to fight her? Or would I drop dead? Can I defeat her and find a way to come back to Shining Armor and Flurry Heart with a big smile? Or will I never see them again?
That last thought makes my heart burst. A stupid, fat tear escapes from my eye.
Chrysalis doesn't notice; she's too busy being her crazy dumb self. She's whimpering. Whimpering .
I really can overpower her.
So I shouldn't waste time, right?
Chrysalis wrings her head back towards me, cradling her jaw with one hoof. She looks at me with a look I haven't seen on her before. It's shock and...
Admiration?
She sucks in a deep breath. "You...you're not dumb."
I know I'm not. I don't respond. I let her drown in the silence.
Silent. Silent. It night as well make my own pot boil over. It stretches on and on for a minute or so when Chrysalis finally snaps, "How dare you."
That's my trigger. That's when everything I've done to forget her rackets up in my brain. That's when I leap forward with a crazy yelp and land on her. That's when I roll on top of her and start pounding my hooves. That's when Chrysalis starts to kick and scream. That's when she kicks me off and I fall on my side and collapse into sobs.
It's only when my tears have dried on my cheeks that Chrysalis mutters something unintelligible. I envision her eyeroll. I don't even know why she's not pounced on me yet.
I don't respond. I'm done today. I'm done with peril and all. I thought I could be a hero. It's too exhausting.
Chrysalis has two bruises, on her jaw and one forming on her collarbone. They're deep yellow. I could've hit her harder, I think. I could've gotten hit. I could've killed her.
But I didn't. I allowed myself to fall into a crazy mess of crying. I wanted Chrysalis to do that. Not me . I feel stupid and worthless. I'm not even the only one being crazy today. I'm all tough one minute, sobbing the next. I have maybe spent the past hour crying, with a dumbstruck Chrysalis just watching.
I'm settled down now. I pull myself up to a sit and swallow, looking my biggest fear in the eyes. Not today . Chrysalis won't fool me with her craziness today.
I startle when I see the dark hoof in front of me.
"C'mon," she says.
I swat it away, and Chrysalis reacts by simply stepping back, which surprises me even more.
I struggle to my hooves, and when I'm done, I ask, "Why? Why are you so nice all of a sudden?"
Chrysalis looks tired. "Because, one, we're trapped in the same cave together and too injured to climb up there." She gestures to the tunnel I was in. "So we have to deal with each other for the time being. And two, you're obviously not backing down."
"Is this you trying to gain my trust?" I'm suspicious. If all of this acting tough and then sincere to each other leads to nothing, I'll go insane.
Chrysalis doesn't even roll her eyes or anything. "You want me to? Because we're going to have to work together to get out of here."
Good point. I take note of the rock under the ledge. Both of us would need to push it in our current state, and our wings are hurt, so we can't fly far. Plus, we may end up depending on each other. Obviously Chrysalis is hungry, and I may go hungry too, if it gets to be that long. I may be an alicorn, but that only means I can last longer.
I heed our bruises and current state of health. I'm not hungry or thirsty yet. But what about home? Shining is undoubtedly getting worried. And poor little Flurry. I feel like a bad mother.
Now's not the time. Now I need to decide whether Chrysalis is going to help me. And, in turn I might help her. Might .
The Great Equestrian Journey
I pace and pace around my room, pondering my decision. Its been five days since I've come here. Five days, and Luna could be getting worse.
And yet, I still can't decide.
Do I help Celestia? If so, this will be her chance to kill me. Remind me of everything I've done. I know, thank you very much.
My room is small. It takes five paces to get from one end to the other. The more I walk, the more I need to turn, and that annoys me.
I flop onto my bed--mine, I guess--and sulk. I pace some more. I sleep. I have dreams. Ah, the irony. They're nightmares.
Every single day, Celestia comes in with the same question and enough food to last the whole day. The food is good. The question is terrible.
I don't want to help her. But then I'd let Luna die, and it would be my fault. But there are doctors and Celestia has her magic, so it's likely that she's just using me--for what? Some days I choose this side.
Other days I think this: Celestia thought I was at fault for Luna's sickness. And I may as well be. You learn to get along with someone when you're with them for a thousand years. You learn to care for them, to...just...love them. I mean, I mean...Luna and I just depended on each other for survival. And now she might depend on me again, no matter how much she must hate me.
Her life is in my hooves. I find myself staring down at them a lot. I'm not exactly depressed. I'm just struggling, see?
And maybe I can get on Celestia's good side and then backstab her.
But that isn't the main reason why, the next time Celestia comes and asks, I say yes.
_____
"Good," Celestia remarks, half-smiling.
I stand still. I just did it. I just said yes.
Am I really doing this?
"Good," I echo.
"Good." Celestia repeats. I begin to wonder when one of us breaks the 'good' chain.
She does. "I reckon you'll need this." From somewhere behind her she levitates a box of--is that--
As soon as she sets it on the bed, I dig right in. I was right! My armor! Helmet, chestplate, even the boots.
Giddiness floods through me. Celestia. Just. Gave. Me. These. All I can say is "I hate you," even though I. Lurve. Her.
My life has suddenly become all armor and some one-word sentences.
_____
She leads me down a couple of hallways. I have my armor back on again, and now that I'm going to see Luna I feel very, very comfortable.
At least, I think I'll see Luna. I hope.
My armor clinks on the linoleum. I chuckle, thinking it's going to annoy Celestia. I'd do anything to annoy her if she won't let me see Luna.
You may ask why I'm not willing to kill her. It's complicated, see. If she lets me visit Luna, not killing her will be worth it. If not, I'm going to follow Celestia until she leads me to her sister. Then, I'll--
Help her. Not possess her. If I were to do that, she'd need to be healthy. And, yes, jealous. Not likely she will be right now. Right now, all Luna will have to worry about is being sick all the time.
So I'll do it after. But what will happen after? Will Celestia dispose of me? Will she forgive me, thinking I'm reformed? I have no idea. I'm even unsure about my decision. I'm even unsure about how I'm alive in the first place. I just remember fighting my sister and then...oh. A reason not to completely trust Celestia.
We take another right. Celestia glances at me, checking to see if I'm there. As if I need to be foal-sitted. The hallway we turn on is dimly lit. It reminds me of a prison.
Prison .
What if this is a trap? Then again, I did see a changeling die from Luna's supposed disease. But maybe that changeling has nothing to do with Luna. Celestia has the ability to lie. Did she lie? I turn towards her, searching her face for betrayal.
But all I see is firmness and...sorrow?
She's not lying about Luna.
She seems disgusted by my previous laugh, so I try to keep a straight face. We round maybe the tenth corner. At the end, there's a huge set of double doors. If these lead to a super-secure dungeon, I wouldn't be surprised.
But they don't. When Celestia opens them, I'm introduced to a dizzying sight. There are...things everywhere. It's hard to explain them. They're on the wall, lit up. One of them resembles a bunch a swirling stuff. The one next to that is all color and no sense. I can't even describe it. If my imprisonment is meant to drive me crazy, then it worked. I am definitely seeing things.
Celestia senses my confusion. She trots over to several ponies that I just now noticed are in the room. "This," she says, "is the lab."
My vision goes absolutely everywhere. My jaw unhinges. Celestia chuckles. "I suppose you've never seen screens before."
Screens ?
Is confusion all I'll never know?
My eyes catch on each of the 'screens', searching each of them. One of the screens has bright red text at the top saying DATA , and below it is a string of numbers.
Then I scan the other screens. They're not very different, besides the swirling grey one and the colorful one. I'm immediately captivated by them.
I slowly walk towards them, studying the shapes that morph and disappear and come back again. It looks like they're in some misshapen circle.
The shapes shrink and then explode. I notice how irregular they are. They're not exploding and imploding. They're following a long, confusing pattern. Not even a pattern, actually.
The screen next to it has an identical shape, but the spinning grey is replaced with bright color. I notice that while most of it is green, there's a big red splotch slowly moving across the scene. I study it closely. The red must mean something.
I don't notice Celestia and a doctor beside me until the doctor speaks. He has a dark brown coat close to mine and a shaggy, unkept light yellow mane. "I see you're interested."
He seems unusually at ease around me, or maybe that's Celestia's presence. He's on my left; she's on my right.
Celestia nods. "I bet this is quite...new." She steps forward to touch the colorful screen, her tone mixed with fact and worry.
"What is it?" I ask.
Celestia takes a deep breath, turns to me, then turns back to the perplexing display. "That's what's going on...in Luna's brain."
The Great Equestrian Journey
Nightmare Moon studies the screens carefully, with fierce determination and a touch of wonder. She takes a shaky step towards them, entirely focused. "So you're telling me..."
"Yes." Doctor August Sun, on the other side of Nightmare, steps up to pinpoint the big, red, pulsating clot on the second screen. "This right here is a mass of something attacking Luna's brain. No one knows exactly what it is. We believe that something is causing something in the brain to malfunction, or that this could just be a tumor. We don't want to risk a surgery if that's not the case."
Nightmare knits her brow. "This is her...brain. How did you get that?"
"We took an MRI." I offer. Nightmare glares at me, as if to say not helping . I decide to elaborate: "Magnetic Resonance Imagery."
"What?!" The frustration mounts in her voice.
Dr. Sun intercepts. "It's very complicated, the science behind it. See, there's two powerful magnets that..."
I can basically see the confusion building, like stacking large, heavy books. By the time Dr. Sun is finished explaining how an MRI works, Nightmare's anger is very visible. But her voice is quiet when she says, "Is this good?"
Dr. Sun doesn't even know how to tell her. I don't know. No one knows. The sight of Nightmare Moon has attracted every single doctor's attention in here, and none of them know how to break the news to her. She might snap. She might cry. I even cried when I was told how much my sister's state was deteriorating each day.
But that also gives me the responsibility to tell Nightmare. I do it for my Luna. "It isn't."
I can't read her expression. Beside her, Dr. Sun stands solemnly. 'Sorry,' he mouths at me. I shake my head, showing that he doesn't need to say that. It's my sister, my doing.
I figure it's time to lead Nightmare out of the lab before she explodes. I nudge her and motion with my hoof. Surprisingly, she obliges.
As we leave, I catch Dr. Sun and tell him I'll see him later. He nods. Nightmare and I leave the lab, letting the doors swing shut behind us.
As soon as they bang closed, Nightmare rounds on me.
At first I feel a flash of panic, like she might hurt me. But she doesn't make any other move. She just stares at me, with an unrecognizable expression. Then, with a huff, she turns on her hooves and trots down the hall.
I know she's annoyed and that it would be best to leave her alone, but I can't help but say, "You can let it all out."
"Yeah, because you're so helpful." Nightmare fluffs her wings, clearly upset. "Did we take a right or left?"
"Right." I decide to leave her alone, letting her lead the way.
She mumbles a rant, and I catch a few words. "Luna...confused...why..." At every corner she asks where we turned. I try to catch up to her mad stomping, making sure she doesn't take a move to escape. I can fight her, anyway. I've told the guard in front of her room that I could watch her, and call for help when needed. Otherwise, she's in my care.
We finally teach her room, Nightmare breathing hard through her nose. I type in the code-covering it with my other hoof so she won't see-and the door slides open.
What scares me most about her attitude is that as soon as she gets inside, she yanks off her helmet and tosses it onto the bed. She's shaking with anger. I'm nearly frightened by her demeanor, by the way she might blow up at any moment.
I step inside, but not before giving the guard beside her door a comforting look, flashing a quick smile. Once I'm inside, I close the door.
Nightmare takes several deep breaths before turning around to punch her pillow. "Ugh ."
I try to intervene with "Are you done?"
Nightmare shuts her eyes and grits out, "Obviously not."
To her surprise, all I do is let her punch the pillow over and over again, then fling her armor on the bed. She keeps glancing at me, expecting me to flinch. I try not to, but with each pound and throw I find my eyes squinting.
She plops down the bed with a sigh. "What are you waiting for? Leave."
I don't. Instead, I walk over to her bedside. "What's wrong?"
"What's wrong --" Nightmare sighs. "What's wrong is that I don't know a single thing."
I try to make my tone understanding. "This may be...new." Nightmare scoffs as I continue. "But it means that--"
"Luna may as well be dead."
This nearly rips my heart open and almost lets all of my stored tears out.
Her eyes look both threatening and a tad hopeless. I try to give her that hope. "Well, I want to do something other than stay at a lab all day. Twilight and her pupil are starting work on finding a cure. But this can't happen of we don't have a key clue."
Nightmare averts her eyes. I've just done the opposite of what I intended to do.
But then...an idea comes to mind. It's not likely to work. Yet my sister is my sister, and I need to give Nightmare a chance to help. This may as well be a journey to reform her , I think, reflecting to Luna's suggestion.
I haven't completely thought it out yet. But it's worth a try.
I try to meet her eyes, conveying the seriousness of my plan. "The key clue is the cause. And we can find the cause."
Nightmare clears her throat. She's obviously impatient.
"You and I," I continue. "You saw the changeling die in the Everfree, right?" Now that I think about it, Luna was taking care of a problem in the Everfree two days before she got sick. And the Everfree is pretty infamous for its ways...
Nightmare picks up on it, too. "The cause is in the Everfree. So..."
"We go looking for it."
"We go looking in the Everfree."
"Yes."
A pause. Then a yes right back.
_____
Dr. August Sun smiles when I enter the lab an hour later. "You're back!"
I smile back at him, but the previous sixty minutes scratch at my mind. "We need to talk. Privately."
He's happy to. I lead him to a corner of the room, where there are no screens or conferring doctors. I appreciate the easy way August handles things; even around Nightmare Moon herself he's calm and collected. I admire the easy way he walks, striding as if nothing can take him down. He's certainly one of the smartest doctors in this room.
"Is this about Nightmare Moon?" he immediately asks. He's even able to say her whole name.
I nod. "I have a plan, and it includes her."
August's expression turns serious, and he shakes his head. "Tell me."
"In order to find a cure, we have to find a cause. And the last time Luna was healthy, she was in the Everfree. That's also where the changeling died." August nods to my every word.
"So you think the cause is in the Everfree. Do you want us to search it?"
"No."
"What do you want us to do?"
"This is my sister. Me and Nightmare Moon will go into the Everfree ourselves."
August's usually peaceful face is laced with alarm. "But...you could contract the disease. And who says that Nightmare Moon won't attack you?"
"She cares for Luna," I reply. I have to get him on my side. "She knows better."
A familiar voice coos, "I know better."
I try to keep from rolling my eyes. "Hello, Discord."
He slithers down from the ceiling. "Hey yourself! I couldn't help but hear your awesome plan, and I would be happy to help."
August glances at me, confused. "Is he supposed to be here?"
"I'm everywhere," is Discord's reply.
"If you can be everywhere, then you can be right next to me when we search the Everfree," I tell him.
Discord launches off the wall. The thud he makes when he hits the ground startles a few doctors. "You're letting me come?!"
I decide to give in to my obligatory eye roll, which does nothing to help anyone. But as it turns out, it's the first relief I've had in days.
The Great Equestrian Journey
Spike is here today.
Good.
I don't even care if he's supposed to be with Twilight.
She can find a cure.
I can find someone to
help me
find Chrysalis.
And he has something. He's rolling it up the hill, something covered halfway with a white cloth. I spot wheels under it. It's transportation, of a sort.
I trot down the hill to help him. "Hey, Spike! Lemme help you." When I approach him, he shrugs me off, despite the sweat dripping from his forehead. It's a sweaty-hot day today.
I ignore him and push it anyway. It's sort of heavy, definitely big for a little dragon.
As we are pushing it, I hear Spike's comforting voice. "Heh, thanks."
As he talks
I feel it
I feel safe
I feel stronger.
I feel like I could protect him.
I feel like, no matter his size, he would have my back.
"I thought you were...with Twilight," I say, remembering what Ember told me this morning.
"She...said...she could handle it...she found a spell...to send letters to Princess Celestia...and she said...it was dangerous...anyway." Spike begins to pant.
We finish rolling it up the hill. A slight breeze blows, lifts the cloth to reveal a flash of bright red.
"What is it?" I ask.
Spike grins. "Behold..."
He yanks off the cloth in one swift motion, revealing a blinding white-and-red wheeled contraption. There's a hole in the middle of it, with a black leather seat in that. In front of the seat is something else, resembling a wheel.
"What is it?" I ask again. The smile won't escape my face.
"It's a 'motorcar'," Spike explains. "Some ponies working at a factory in Manehattan came up with it."
"Recently?"
"Recently."
"How'd you get it?"
Spike taps his chin. "Well, we were checking it out, and they were testing the car with Rainbow Dash, and she let us have it."
I'm dumbfounded. "But why?"
"She said 'with rent'."
I laugh. Spike must have really begged her to get something like this. "Well, its on me. How much?"
"Who cares how much?" Spike remarks. "I just wanna ride this thing!"
I chuckle and watch as he jumps into the seat and straps something across him. He takes out a silver key.
Then he starts it up.
The noise invades my ears. It's like a deep, grounded, gravelly roar. A putrid smell infiltrates my nose. I shake my head and put my hooves to my ears. I catch Spike giggling at me, though I can't hear him.
The noise and smell almost overwhelms me
and for a moment
it reminds me of the Hive
of her .
But I have Spike. He has me. We can depend on each other.
Right?
I don't realize that my eyes are squinted until I can only make put a bunch of brown smoke. Dust. I try to widen my eyes, but they suddenly pang. "Stand back!" Spike screams over the deafening noise.
And then-zip -he's gone.
I watch the motorcar speed down the hill, Spike whooping just loud enough for me to hear him. The noise and smell fades as he gets farther.
I begin to worry
that he won't
be coming back.
I worry as he fades into a little speck.
The speck gets bigger, and my shoulders sag in relief.
Spike vrooms up the hill, and I think I can hear his laugh. He pulls up right beside me, turns the key, and the sound cuts off. The oily smell evaporates.
"What'd you think?" Spike asks.
I shake my head. "You're crazy."
"Indeed I am." Spike sits tall and proud. "Wanna have a try?"
I don't think I can fit in that. "No..."
Spike groans. "C'mon. Is it too fast? Too small, I bet. Well, you'll have to watch me ride it then."
_____
It's after a long day of watching Spike go around the yard in his motorcar when I think I'm due for bed. The sun is beginning to set, and the sky has turned purple and indigo. It won't
be long
before it's black
and then
and then her .
I shake my head. I can't let myself think about this. Spike is here. He's my anchor to reality.
He should be.
Someone should be.
But what if
what if
no one can save me?
What if I'm being selfish?
What if I'm using Spike as a shield?
And what if...what if...
"What's wrong?"
Spike's very welcome voice wrenches me out of my thoughts.
"What do you mean?" I can't let him know I'm worried. I'll make him worried. And why, even in his presence, am I anxious? Whys and what ifs clog my mind every single day. It might drive me crazy.
Spike frowns. "You were staring off into the distance."
"Just...thinking. I'm tired. Are you going home?" Please don't. Please do. What's wrong with me?
Spike nods. "Yeah. I suppose it's dark enough out."
I watch him get back in the motorcar. I watch him wave to me. I hear the earsplitting sound. I watch as he rumbles down the hill. I
watch him go.
I don't know how long I stand there. I don't know. I don't know.
I don't.
Not
at
all.
I don't understand me .
I imagine myself exploding right here and now. I can't move.
I...
Author's Note
This is the LAST of the original twelve chapters I have already written on Wattpad. So expect updates to be slower.
Thanks,
The Great Equestrian Journey
I can't even wait to get out of here.
If only this darn rock would move. It can roll on its own, but can't roll when two ponies are pushing it, apparently.
I ram my shoulder into the rock, and it budges just a little. I'm about to give up when there's a shout behind me. "Move !"
Cadence stares at me with wide eyes, brushing back her messy mane with a hoof. We have been here for hours already, both of us losing our sanity. If my mane was ugly before, I can only imagine what it looks like now. Both of us are covered in rock dust and bruises, especially from when Cadence attacked me.
Cadence shouts at me to move again. She's steadying herself at the wall parallel to the rock, slightly teetering. I can imagine what kicking her off of me felt like. It almost makes me grin. I don't. Besides, I'll have time to finish her off as soon as she gets me out of here. For now, we have stand each other.
Cadence takes a shaky breath and then--zip .
Oh no. She's going to kill herself .
I try to leap in the way, but she dodges me. I try to plead with her. "Cadence, stop!"
CRASH !
I flinch, and some part of my mind fills with glee for a moment, but it's quickly replaced with a frown of worry. Because not only has the rock moved at least a couple meters, but Cadence has moved too, only backwards. She's struggling to stay on her hooves.
And then I notice the blood.
Cadence collapses.
I approach her, taking my time just so she can see who's in charge. I can't believe I'm forcing myself to stand her attitude. But the struggle, for some reason, is fun. It's a harder game.
Then I realize that the blood on her head is not a game. Not a trick. It is blood, and it's oozing from a cut on her forehead. Not a cut.
A gash.
I drop to my knees by her side. "Cadence, are you okay?"
"Obviously not," she mumbles.
Cadence tries to get up to a sitting position, but her front legs keep sliding. Her eyes are struggling to stay open, and I see tears beginning to form. Blood continues to flow from her head.
I watch almost in horror. Almost. That glee is still there, but it's a ghost. I realize something.
If I hadn't gotten in her way, if I hadn't changed her course, if she hadn't slowed down a tiny bit to get past me, she'd likely be unconscious. Or dead.
And then I would be alone.
Which is really sad, considering. I'd be stuck down here, with nothing but my past and anger, without anything but the rocks to take my madness out on. I'd be alone . That single thought is scary.
So instead of being a prick, I decide not to let Cadence suffer. She will as soon as we get out. I promise myself that.
I hold out my hoof again, and Cadence looks at me wearily. I can see the tired face of a warrior. The warrior that Cadence has become. It's wise and it's no-nonsense. I wish I could summon that look.
To my complete surprise, Cadence takes it. She looks at me suspiciously. That's how I know how tough it's going to be for her to trust me. If I don't gain her trust, then I won't be able to seize her when we escape. And then she'll tell everyone about me. A fate I'd like to escape.
That is when I begin to wonder. Would Cadence try to kill me? Is she tough enough to take me over? Will I be defenseless? Of course not.
I hate this new Cadence.
Wobbling, she stands up, eyes flitting around in my general direction. She doesn't show any signs of fear, or that she will jump on top of me again. Then again, this Cadence is pretty unpredictable.
She takes a few steps before she stops and takes a deep breath. This seems to calm her quaking legs and wild eyes. I feel obligated to tell her about the blood, but she lifts a hoof to her head, looks at all the deep red, and, instead of dramatically screaming, sighs, "Great."
Of course she wouldn't scream. Why can't I ever get used to her? She is getting on my nerves . My nerves are probably screaming .
I feel like screaming.
Cadence sits back down again, and it feels like a slap in the face that she does it just after me helping her up. It's disrespectful to a queen, I'd say.
I will be a queen. I will kill Cadence. I need to. I will get out of here, and I will get my revenge on Thorax. I will rule Equestria.
I need to.
Where did this need come from?
I shake my head. The thought scares me. I can't let myself get confused. I can't let myself--
Cadence is back up again, and she points a hoof at me, panting. "You...are going to help me push this damned rock or... we'll be the...sorriest...ponies ever." She takes a deep breath when she finishes.
Then she turns back towards the rock. It's about three yards from the tunnel. We just need to push it three yards...and then we'll be free. And then...
Do I really want this?
Of course I do, I tell myself. Nothing will stop me from being powerful.
Cadence is already attempting to push the rock, but she keeps slipping and sliding because her balance is so off. If I'm going to get out of here, I'm going to help her. Just for now. Just for now.
So I make my way over to the rock and push with all my will and all my might. Nothing happens at first, but I don't give up. I need to get out of here. No. Matter. What.
Then it moves.
"Yes!" I cry out. Cadence whoops. We're finally moving!
We slowly nudge the rock towards the entrance to the tunnel, until it's about a hoof away from it. That's it for Cadence. She dashes around me and scrambles hungrily up the rock. Her hooves latch onto the tunnel floor and she pulls herself up.
I come immediately after her, climbing on up just as she gets in the tunnel. I try to hold on to the rugged tunnel floor, but the sweat on my hooves makes me slip. I'm just holding onto the edge, and the rock groans as it rolls--
Then a hoof grabs mine. Cadence pulls me up, grunting. I'm frankly surprised by her strength, especially with her injuries.
I finally get my back legs on the floor, and I cough, exhausted. Cadence runs down the tunnel, shouting at me to "Come on!"
I don't even question why she wants me to stay. I follow, my victory glowing right there in front of me.
The Great Equestrian Journey
I have no idea whatsoever why Discord, of all creatures, is here. This is what I tell Celestia when she points him out.
"Because," she responds, "he insisted." From the tone of her voice, she's already exhausted by him. I can surely relate. He is literally bouncing off the walls.
Literally.
I wonder how much insisting Celestia would have gone through, or maybe she just caved in because saying no to him would be terrifying. Either way, Discord, who I'd like to call Chaos Delivery Guy(and yes, I say things like 'guy' now), is coming with us. Which doesn't make me happy. Not at all.
But I chose the wrong time to object. We're going into the Everfree early the next morning, and it's already eight PM. I should get a good night's sleep, right? Except for the fact that I'm basically nocturnal.
Celestia drops me off in my room after going over the whole thing in the boardroom, smiles weakly, and shuts the door behind me.
I keep pacing the room exactly like I did when I was pondering my decision whether or not to help Celestia. I find myself not regretting that decision. After all, Luna, wherever she is, needs help. And I will be there for her. I am almost satisfied with it--
If only Discord weren't breathing on my neck right now.
I stiffen, realize who it is, and roll my eyes. "Dis. Cord."
I can almost hear the volume of his grin as he plops down on my bed and readies his fingers(?) for a snap.
I duck just as an eagle soars over my head and repeat probably everyone's least favorite name. "Discord!"
He laughs, big and boastful, and makes the eagle disappear. An eagle ? Now that is random. Why not a good ol' elephant? Why an eagle that could peck my face off?
I unfurl from my crouched position and walk on over to the windowsill, since I would rather not sit in the same bed as Chaos Delivery Guy(I have lost all hope of using my old language). I set my face to stone as I sneer at him with only my eyes. "Why are you here?"
Discord props himself up on one elbow. "I thought I'd throw a little 'Let's Save Luna' party for you."
I grit my teeth. "I need sleep." Not only that. I can tell that he's about to say something entirely personal to me.
"You're very, very close to her. You once were Luna, after all. So why are you helping her? To possess her again?"
I breathe in through my nose, my muscles tense, and my mind begins to come up with a million comebacks. But nothing comes from my mouth. This...it struck close to my heart. Why can't an absolute idiot like him see?
But Discord snickers. "Just messin' with you. Now to be honest I am wondering, but I know you'll only blow off my head."
I decide to try to put him in his place by smiling wickedly and replying, "Watch me."
I begin to conjure a spell that will only make him be sore. I smile wider and wider as I...my magic's not working. My magic is not working .
Discord is enjoying it so far. "Magic's not allowed in here, isn't it?"
"Then how in Equestria did you conjure an eagle ?"
Huffing, I face away from him out the window. It's a full moon tonight, one that casts my entire room with a dim glow. I find comfort in it. I know it's not mine anymore, but still. It's mine to me.
A few seconds later, I hear him get off the bed. "Hey, I'm sorry. Learn to take a joke."
I nearly swallow my lips in attempt not to explode. I continue looking at my comfort.
Discord is beside me, looking at the moon himself. Then he nearly shoves me over when he tries to fit his long, slender body on the windowsill. He's hilariously hunched over. I snort at him, and he pretends to be hurt when I know that he's really enjoying it.
It's silent for a moment, and then I steal this chance to run to the bed, jump in, and beat Discord in his own race. He grins at me over his puppy dog eyes.
"Goodnight" I mutter, and yank the covers over my head. I can imagine Discord scheming.
But it's peaceful. And quiet. I have the feeling the ding-dong's left already.
And then a really loud whisper from the windowsill: "Hey, you asleep yet?!"
"UGH ."
_____
Discord is officially my alarm clock.
He wakes me up with a "Ya-HOO!" and then informs me that that beautiful aroma is food. I find that he's not kidding. He didn't even touch it with his weird powers.
Next, I search for my armor that I placed under the bed. Except it's not there. I find that Discord is carrying the box it's in.
"Give it back," I demand.
"If you take a shower. You stink ."
"Where even is a shower?"
"Mare's room. I know where it is."
I sigh. "I'd have to risk escaping this room to get there."
Discord gives me a weird look. "Since when did the great Nightmare Moon follow the rules?"
"Since when did you know where the mare's room is?"
_____
At least Discord provided a cover for me. I'm back in my room, drying off with a towel. I stow it under the bed so no one will find out. Discord reluctantly gives me my armor since I won't stop pleading with him. Once I'm done putting it on, he insists that I need to see my 'true form' and conjures a mirror.
I smile at my reflection. I look like a true ruler. A feared one. I look like what Nightmare Moon would look like.
_____
We're by the castle gates, Celestia checking in with her personal guard and Discord performing 'magic tricks' for the other guards. They seem to love him; I wonder how they know him. I'm standing by my own--you know why--as Doctor August Sun loads me with saddlebags. "Just some food and equipment for survival."
"Thanks," I mutter.
As Celestia and Discord finish getting ready, I allow myself to drift. I found out I was staying near the hospital wing of the castle--Luna was so, so close.
As I look over there now, I imagine my counterpart. Lying on a bed, surrounded by what must be more advanced things than a millennia ago. She's pale. Skinny. Fragile. Many things, but not well. Not healthy. Not strong enough to support herself. Doctor August Sun and a few other doctors surround her, taking notes. She'll look at them and smile a bit. And then go to sleep. And then wake up. And then go to sleep. And then wake--
"Nightmare Moon?"
I swivel my head towards the voice--Celestia. "What?"
"Are you ready to go?"
Outside, it's clear and beautiful. I can't imagine a world like this being destroyed. I can't imagine Luna being destroyed.
So when I say "Yes", it's the most meaningful word in the world. "I couldn't be more ready."
Celestia nods, the gates open, and we leave.
END OF PART ONE
The Great Equestrian Journey
Before you read further:
The theme of this story is CHANGE. So sorry if the characters seem a little out of shape, but I can guarantee you that each main character will undergo a change.
Also, this is my very first fanfic, so expect lots of factual errors. This takes place before the end of season 7, so you don't get confused in the future.
Thanks,
L.L.
