"So, what exactly does your friend do around here?" I asked.

"Rainbow? She's part of the weather team in charge of the weather here." Twilight answered.

"You guys make the weather here?" I asked.

"Uh huh. Do humans not have magic where you're from?" Twilight asked me.

I nod. "No, sadly. The weather works by itself. And before you ask, no, we don't have wings. But we do have airplanes!"

Interesting. Twilight thought. I wonder if the same thing applies to the sun and moon in his world? I'll have to ask him later.

"Oh, here's Rainbow Dash right now." Twilight said.

Then, a cyan blur flew towards me at supersonic speeds.

"Oh for [REDACTED]s sake."

"What happened after that?" Dad asked me.

"She tackled me, like, football quarterback tackled me." I say, making a pounding gesture with my hands. "THAT kind of tackle."

"TWILIGHT, GET OUTTA HERE! MONSTER! I'LL HANDLE HIM! LEMME AT HIM!" Rainbow Dash yelled out, tackling me hard.

She somehow picked me up, despite having no fingers whatsoever and looking like she was about to slam my body down like it was the WWE.

I retaliated by the only means I knew how to... I belted her across the face with my gloved fist. Rainbow yelped in pain.

"Why'd you punch her?" Dad asked.

"Don't you think that was unnecessary?" Mom inquired.

"Well, not at the time, but I needed to send her a message: If ANYONE has the balls to attack me... I can guarantee one of two things to them. One, a broken nose. Two, I WILL retaliate. I still kinda feel bad about doing that to Rainbow, though. I'll have to apologize again when I see her."

She dropped me and was about to charge me. I pulled out my whip to fend her off.

I took out my whip and cracked it several times.

"YAH!!! BROWN SNAKE!" Rainbow said, before swallowing her fear to charge me a second time.

Before she could charge, and possibly kill me, Rainbow was then enveloped inside of a magenta telekinetic aura.

"RAINBOW DASH! HE'S NOT A MONSTER, HE'S OUR FRIEND!"

"He attacked me!" she screamed out.

"Because he felt threatened!" Twilight countered.

"WHY ARE YOU DEFENDING HIM?!?!?!?!" Rainbow Dash screamed.

"He needs friends, the rest of Ponyville ran off when they saw him!"

"I don't blame them! I've never seen anything like him..." Rainbow Dash started ranting.

As they argued back and forth, millions upon millions of scenarios ran through my mind, one of which involved being arrested by their equivalent of the U.S. Army. As they argued, it felt like two girls vying for my affection (which hasn't happened to me yet), I couldn't take it anymore. As I watched them argue, and I've never broken up an argument mind you, what they were doing made me wonder who the real adult was. I had to do something. I contemplated using my whip again, but then I decided against it.

"Alright. That's it." I say, grabbing Rainbow by her fur and dragging her to me.

"I CAN'T TAKE YOUR ARGUING ANYMORE! I AM SICK AND TIRED OF BEING TREATED LIKE A WILD ANIMAL, WHICH I'M NOT BY THE WAY! CAPICHE?! DO YOU UNDERSTAND ME?!"

"Yes sir." Rainbow hilariously squeaked out.

I cough a few times and clear my throat. "I think I swallowed a fly!"

"Rainbow," Twilight said. "Chase here needs help with making friends with the rest of the town. They all ran off and shut themselves inside their homes. YOU wouldn't want to be ignored or left alone would you?"

"Well, now that you mention it... that would suck if I were him." Rainbow says. "Yeah, sure I'll help. Not like I have anything better to do anyways."

I sigh and rub my temples with my gloved hands. "I'm surrounded by xenophobes."

Author's Note

And another chapter for you!