I stand staring into my bathroom mirror. I stare into my blue eyes, to anyone else it would've looked like I was having a mental crisis. But no, I'm just bored. I sigh, and start to mess with my hair. My hair being brunette and normally slicked back and hidden under a beanie is now in view. I drag my fingers through it before picking up my plain black beanie and putting it back on. I adjust my white T-Shirt and flannel sleeveless jacket.

"Not bad." I say with a smile.

I reach into my pocket. The feeling of the black denim of my jeans is one I've felt for years now. It's rare that I'll wear anything other than jeans, but when I do it's normally because I can't be bothered to mess around with buttoning up and getting a belt for my jeans. I pull out my wallet and check the amount of money inside of it. Two £10 notes look at me.

"I could get a few things that I need. Some bread, some drinks and some ramen because it's cheap. That'll last me till next week." I mumble to myself as I close my wallet and put it back in my pocket.

I check the time on my watch. A brown leather strap holds a silver coloured metal in place which holds all of the mechanisms inside whilst a slightly scratched pane of plastic protects the face of the watch whilst also letting me see the time.

"Eleven in the morning.... I should probably get a drink."

I turn around and leave the bathroom. I walk down my hallway and down a set of stairs into another hallway. I enter my living room and sit on my couch. The brown leather squeaks as my hands slide on it. I sigh and look around the room. Behind me I hear a weird buzzing sound. I turn to face it only to be blinded by a bright white light.

"Holy fuck." I groan as I rub at my eyes.

"What the hay just happend?"

*Whimper*

"This isn't the library.... Or our cottage...."

Ah! My fucking eyes! I hear you! Whoever you are GET OUT OF MY HOUSE! AH FUCK!" I shout as a strong pain runs through my eyes.

"Who said that?"

"I did!" I shout as I raise my hand.

"We're sorry we'll leave as soon as possible."

"I-I'm sorry."

I keep rubbing at my eyes trying to get rid of the pain. After a few seconds the pain goes away and I can open my eyes again. I immediately look behind me and see a weird dog like creature. The left half of it's body is purple leading to a weird horned horse looking head whilst the right side is yellow, has a singular wing and also leads to a weird horse looking head.

"What... The... Fuck..." I mumble.

"What's wrong?"
"What's wrong?" They both ask in sync.

"W.... What are you?"

"We're a pony. Well.... A mix of two. It's complicated." The purple half explains.

"Right.... This is fucked.... I don't remember taking Acid.... Or Magic Mushrooms...."

"I don't know what those are but one sounds dangerous while the other sounds interesting."

"Twi.... I'm scared.... Where are we?" The yellow half asks with a whimper.

"I don't know Shy but I don't think we're in our cottage anymore." The purple half answers.

"This is completely fucked up. I'M completely fucked up. A two headed pony is talking to me. A TWO HEADED PONY IS TALKING TO ME.... I need some fucking mental help...."

"Anyway.... Can you tell us where we are?" The purple side asks.

"You're in my mind, it's on I'm Fucked In The Head street in the city of Send Helpsville." I answer.

"I'm Fucked In The Head Street? Send Helpsville? Shy we're not in Equestria anymore." The purple half mumbles.

"I want to go back home Twi...." The yellow side whimpers.

"Equestria? What or Where the fuck is that?" I ask.

"It's where we're from. It's a large place filled with cities, towns and villages." The purple half answers.

"Wait.... Is that a real place?"

"Of course it is, we're not making it up I can assure you." The purple half answers.

"Wait a minute.... You're real?" I ask.

A cold droplet of sweat drips down the back of my neck.

"Of course we are. We're right here aren't we?" The purple half asks in a sarcastic tone.

"So... I'm not crazy.... There's actually a two headed pony talking to me...."

I look at the two? Of them.

"I guess that's fine.... If you're actually real then I guess freaking out would be pointless.... Although I'm not gonna lie, seeing a two headed talking pony is veeeeery unsettling.

"I'm glad to see you've calmed down." The purple half says with a smile.

"Calm? On the outside I have but on the inside I'm screaming like no tomorrow."

"Oh...."

I take a deep breath and relax for a minute.

"Are you guys hungry? I have some food in the kitchen." I ask.

"We're a little hungry." The purple half answers whilst the yellow half just blushes and hides it's face behind it's mane.

"I have some apples in the fridge if you want some." I offer.

"We'll both have one if you don't mind." The purple half answers.

"Sure, I'll just go get you some."

I stand up and head into the kitchen. I open the fridge and grab a pair of apples. I take another deep breath to calm myself down and then close the refrigerator. I head back into the living room and hold out the apples for them to take.

"Thanks." The purple one says as she tries to grab the apple only for it to slip out of her grasp. "Urm.... I can't grab it...."

I take yet another deep breath and pick up the apple that she dropped.

"What if I hold them while you eat them?" I ask nervously.

"That would help, thanks."

I hold one apple in my right hand for the yellow half to eat and the other apple in my left hand for the purple side to eat. Feeding a two headed talking pony is probably the weirdest thing I've ever done. After a few minutes they finish eating their apples.

"Okay, I'm gonna go wash my hands and I'll be back in a minute."

"Okay. Do you mind if we take a seat on your sofa?" The purple half asks.

"Sure, go for it." I answer.

"Thanks."

I head back into the kitchen and wash my hands.

"This is the weirdest day of my life....." I mumble.

Author's Note

What do you think? The begining of "Let's Get Weird - Freak 'Em Out". This story is going to be a lot more weirder and more characters will be added as time goes on, each with their own thing that makes them weird.