"Anon!"

The door burst open, Celestia standing majestically in the doorway, her mane flowing gracefully through the air that lacked moving air, trumpets blaring from around her. Or behind her. Whatever.

"I hereby challenge you to a duel!" Her grin, a godly mix of smug and glee, beamed at Anon.

Anon stared at the white horse.

"Hell no, I don't know where you've been. Ain't touching that disgusting thing."

Celestia promptly turned into an imitation of Big Mac, failing to express her anger and embarrassment, and quickly exited the room, taking her trumpeters with her. "You...you disgusting creature...Luna! LUNA WHAT DID HE DO TO YOU?!"

Anon sighed and turned back to whatever the fuck he was doing.

"Come on, washing your hooves is common decency. Why does nobody know this?"

Author's Note

Fuck you, I'm tired.

More shit coming soon, I swear.