Isn’t Murphy’s Law basically Karma?

Unsurprisingly, I woke up earlier than the Doctor. Even though I can dream lucidly, my natural clock still makes me wake up at 6:30. I blame High School. Might as well make breakfast just Incase, hope the Doctor has eggs.

*five minutes later*

Just a touch of mayonnaise, salt and pepper, stir around as even as possible... done! And there’s the Doctor coming down the stairs. “Kendrick! What are you doing! Ponies could see you!” Hmm, didn’t think about that. Wait... it’s 6:35, we’re like the only two awake at this ungodly hour. I’m gonna respond with that.

“Hmm... yes I suppose that’s true. But still, be more careful. Now, let’s eat!” We sit down and start devouring the gigantic mound of eggs I made.

“Quite good, not the best, but still very good for one of your age.” ‘Thank you.’ I write down in response. “Your welcome. Usually I have to cook, and that is... worse. Anyway! I will have to get you a collar and some protein pills. We have to uphold apprences and there is no meat eating.” I nod in understanding.

Walking out the door he says, “Now take a nap or something until I come back. Bye!”

I decide to take his advice to take a nap. As I settle down, not paying attention to anything else, I start to think. Maybe I can be happy- CLUNCK!

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Unknown time later, location unknown.

Fuck! My head! What happened! Oh no, I was thinking happy thoughts about the future! MURPHY WHY?!

Well, time to acces the situation. Opening my eyes, I find myself in a cage hanging above a pit/arena. Inside the arena I can see two humans, the different one from yesterday, and one holding a shiv. Comeon Outlier, beat him! It’s obvious these are fighting pits, and I’m a fighter. Oh, looks like Outlier just took a massive hit! Wait, Outlier’s got the shiv, and there goes the animals neck.

He knows how to apply a weapon to a weak spot, not a fighter, but definitely intelligent like me. Oh, looks like I’m moving forward into the pit now.

“Let’s bring out the next competitor! The savior of one Dinky Doo from a Timberwolf pack, and a sure savage, bring him out!” Ohh! Must be talking about me, the flattery is appreciated guys! Now the floor drops, I land and try to show peace.

I hit the ground hard, dosnt matter, and look the Outlier in the eyes. He looks back, and I raise my hands like the French. He seems to understand this, and looks very surprised by it, but nods his head and starts walking towards me. I do the same.

When we meet in the middle, I hold out my hand in a sign of an alliance. He reaches out and shakes it, accepting my offer. Now, a shiv just doesn’t seem right, but I don’t have any weapons he could use. Oh well, I’ll just put on my Mirror Knight armor and prepare my katana.

At my suddenly appearing weapons and armor, Outlier jumps back, until he realizes what I’m doing. Probably writes it off as magic.

“Ohhoho! What have we here! Looks like the fighters are allies! And one has armor and a weapon! This should be worth your money! Onto the duo fights! Bring out the competitors!” Two humans appear, weilding clubs and looking similar to Arnold Schwarzenegger. The both of us intelligents look at each other and nod, accepting our fate of fighting.

Together we charge.

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Several fights later.

Killing the twentieth human they sent against us, I take note of our two health’s. I was bruised and batterd, armor almost painted red, unable to use Estus Flasks or Lifegems, I was as damaged as ever. My friend the Outlier, was bleeding from so many wounds it wasn’t even funny, I am surprised he could still stand.

“Now for the grand finaley! Our new champions, the Mirrored Death, shall go against our two strongest humans left! Bring out the Tanks!” The crowd erupts into applause as two cages open.

Holy shit... Bill, Louis, Francis, grant me your strength. For, across the arena, are two hulking monsters that put one message in my head. TANK! TANK! FUCKING TANK! Me and Outlier look at each other, both of us seemingly recognizing these behemoths from Left4Dead. Not one but two are what we have to face.

Wanting to protect Outlier, being as damaged as he is, I charge first at the tanks. I get to one as the other goes to Outlier, and I slice at his arm with the katana, +15 and everything, and it gets lodged into his arm. Before I can even process the fact that a +15 katana was lodged in a things arm, I am punched away, flying across the arena.

This motherfucker just took my katana into his arm! I pull out my staff. This man right here is about to receive the biggest Soul Spear attack ever!

He slowly limps to me on one arm as I charge up my attack. When he gets close enough to where he could hit me if he jumped, I fire, mixing in my shout as well.

My katana just gets returned to my inventory as the tank goes flying, body torn in two. Hahahahhahahahahhhahhahahh! Take that motherfucker! I turn to find Outlier pinned with the tank pressing down on him.

I take out my katana again and rush to help, oblivious to the sounds of battle from the crowd. I arrive, but I do not save him, by the time I arrive a beam out of nowhere hits the tank. The body can’t even fly because the entire thing is now ash.

Looking down at Outlier, I want to see the damage. Oh... no... his eye! I must try to help him!

I take out a chime filled with the only miracle I ever learned in Dark Souls, Heal, and start to use it right over him.

Golden circle, kneeled down, look up, and finally- ouch! Why is there a dart in me? Wait, why am I becoming tired? What’s happening...

+1 Karma! You made peace and helped a stranger at the risk of your life! With negotiations and peace down, your body feels a new part of it unlock! You can now speak!

Author's Note

My posting time,