Jackie, Swagger, Spike, the girls, and I walked through the Rainbow Falls Traders Exchange. While we walked among the stalls, Twilight had a proposition for me. " So let me get this straight. I take over your role as moderator for the trader's exchange so you don't get hounded by everyone here? What's in it for me?"

" Bob and I'll watch your kids the next time you, Luna, and Applejack want a night alone." Both mine and Jackie's cheeks reddened at that. " Anyway, all you really have to do is settle disagreements over whether or not a trade is fair, you can still walk around and see what's up for trade."

" Good, I've been meaning to get rid of some of my crap, and it'll be interesting to see what others have to offer."

" Speaking of, don't forget to look for a gift for Luna and the youngins." Jackie reminded me of this morning's conversation.

" Can do. Any of you looking for anything specific?"

" I'm looking to see if someone has a first edition Daring Do book, and I got the perfect thing to trade." She then pulls out a rusty horseshoe.

We all stare at it before laughing. Swagger was the first to recover. " I don't think you'll be able to get the first edition with a horseshoe."

" Oh yeah, well what did you bring to trade?"

Swagger brought out his ghillie suit and a couple of books by Steve Alten. " Figured these might interest someone. Might be able to get something for a certain purple Alicorn." This caused Twilight to blush.

Fluttershy brought out a whistle with a bear head. " I'm going to see if I can trade my bear whistle for a new bird whistle."

" I'm gonna see if I can trade some gems for elemental arrows." Spike then brought out a decent-sized sack of gems. " Those could come in handy against a few Timberwolves." I thought to mess with him by letting out a small howl behind his back. " Gah! Timberwolf!" He then starts aiming his bow in every direction.

" Easy there, hotshot. You'll put someone's eye out." He put away his bow while giving off a nervous chuckle. " What about you sweetie, you looking for anything in particular?"

" Well, I've been meaning to look for some vintage cookware, especially a pie tin, they the pie crust crispy on the outside and the inside warm and moist." Mmm, pie. " I just hope I have enough items to trade for it."

" Well, if you don't, then maybe you and I can pool our resources together?" Rarity pointed to her saddlebags. " I was looking for a vintage piece of jewelry to compliment a dress I've been working on."

" I'm pretty sure that any one of your items can procure what you need. No need to blow your wad on one thing." The girls cringed while Spike and Swagger laughed at the joke.

After recovering, Twilight asked, " What about you Joe, anything you're looking for?"

" That's the beauty about places and events like this, you can wander aimlessly with no expectation on finding anything, and then bam, you find the thing that you've always wanted but didn't even know you wanted."

" That's what I do all the time!" Pinkie told us while hopping onto my back. "Every time I come here, I always find something I never knew I wanted." She then starts to shake her mane, causing all sorts of things to fall out, like a jewel-encrusted toilet brush, a dragon mask, and even one of those damn flugelhorns from the Crystal Empire.

" Well, I hope you find something cool." Please, no more crazy horns.

We went our separate ways after that. I, carrying my bag of crap, looking amongst the stalls and vendors for something that might catch my interest. While wandering, I heard the sound of a hammer hitting an anvil. " Hmm, maybe I can trade for some new shoes for Luna?" I went over to the sound of hammering and came to a stall that had all kinds of weaponry and armor. Behind the stall, a blue stallion with receding hair and a saddlebag with various tools was hammering away at a hot piece of metal. " Yo, whatcha got that's fit for a size eighteen horseshoe?"

The stallion spits on the red hot metal, instantly cooling it before turning to me. " Does it look like I make fucking horseshoes? I make weapons to kill monsters and armor to protect your sorry hide." Damn, this guy has a serious attitude problem. " Now, if you don't have anything that's worth my time, then get your ugly ass face away from my-." His tirade ended once he saw my ax sticking behind me. " Where in all the nine realms did you get that?"

" What, this?" I brought out Frostbite to flash it for him. " This was gifted to me by Faust herself after I brought Luna back from her darkness. However, this is not up for trade."

The stallion looks left and right before putting up a sign saying he'll be back. " Come with me, there's something I need to tell ya." He left the stall and started heading for a cave. I thought this was a little weird, but then again, he's only an earth pony with a receding hairline while I'm a werewolf-alicorn hybrid. I followed him into the cave where he stopped as soon as the light was unable to reach us. He looked around, making sure we weren't followed or that anyone else was in here. Satisfied, he turned to me. " You may not believe me, but I'm the one who forged that there ax."

" You're absolutely right, I don't believe you. This ax was crafted by master dwarven blacksmiths thousands of years ago, not by a middle-aged pony with a bad attitude." I turned to leave and find the others to share a laugh, but I felt the ax leave my back. When I turned around, the stallion had my ax and went about examining it. What really got to me, was that he was able to summon it as I can. " How did you do that!? Give it back!"

" Don't get your panties in a bunch, I'm just making a point." He places Frostbite on the cave floor before continuing. " This weapon is called upon by its wielder as well as its maker, and as I said before, I made the fucking thing." I looked at him, still having doubts about his revelation. " You want more proof? Fine, here's your fucking proof!" The stallion got up and headed for the large rock in the middle of the cave. He went behind the rock and when he came out from behind the rock, he was no longer a pony, but a midget with blue skin and an apron.

" Do you believe me now, Fuck-stain?" A million questions ran through my head, like if this guy really is a dwarf? Am I high as fuck? Is Discord playing a prank? Am I high as fuck? Is this fucker a changeling? Am I high as fuck!? " Hey! You got shit in your ears or something!?"

I shook my head before focusing on the ' Dwarf'. " Okay, so you're a dwarf, and from what Mimir told me-"

" Mimir! You know where that talking ball of useless information is?"

" Useless information!" I brought out Mimir from my belt so he could face the dwarf. " Why don't you say that to my face you blue-balled midget!" The two of them glared at each other for a moment before they both burst into laughter that echoed throughout the cave. " It's good to see you again Brok, old friend."

" It's good to see you too, you one-eyed bastard."

" Hold on. Brok? The dwarf that created Gungnir, Mjolnir, and Frostbite here?" I pointed to the ax for emphasis.

" Is that what you called Faust's ax? I oughta shove a red-hot poker up your ass for calling it that you big turd!" He brought out some engraving tools from his apron and pointed the business end of them at me.

" First off, Faust gave it to me, so I have the right to name it, and Frostbite seemed appropriate, given its frost runes. Second, she never mentioned that it had a name when she gave it to me. Third, what was the original name?"

" It was called the Leviathan Ax, but I guess those are some good points."

" Thanks, but I have some questions for you. Like how the hell did you end up here in Equestria? And how were you able to disguise yourself?"

" How I got here was easy enough. Us dwarves have a way of moving between the realms without even being seen." He goes behind the rock and appears behind me while holding a leg of mutton. " As for the disguise, Loki ain't the only one that can change their appearance."

" Yeah, I know what you mean." The memory of that buggy bitch comes to mind. " So tell me, why is it you're selling your wares at a trade show in Equestria?"

" I come here once a year to pawn off some of my crappier work in exchange for items that one can only find in a world made from other worlds." He then points to my ax. " When I saw that old ax, I just had to tell you who I am."

Fascinating, but if you'll excuse me, I have some looking around to do. Oh, and just so we're on the same page, you don't have to disguise yourself here." He looked like he was about to retort, but I just pointed to myself, then outside, and he quickly shut his mouth. " Trust me, it's not that big a deal. In fact, why don't you come with me? You can meet my friends."

" Beats sitting in one place with fucking hooves." He followed me out of the cave without a disguise and was surprised by the lack of screams from the patrons of the exchange. " Huh, what do you know, shit for brains was telling the truth."

" I do that quite a lot and yet people are always surprised."

" And for good reason."

" Quiet, head." We went about the place, looking for something that would catch our eye or the others. As it turns out, we met op with Twilight and Pinkie, and Pinkie was doing her best to convince ponies to trade high-quality items for Twilights books. " Pinks, Twi. I got someone for you to meet." The two of them saw me coming with Brok and their jaws dropped.

Pinkie was the first to respond. " Hey, Joe. Who's the blue guy?"

Brok went to make himself known. " The name's Brok, and if you call me blue again, I'll smack the pink off ya!" This made the ponies around us gasp at the threat.

" What the hell Brok? She didn't mean anything by that."

" Don't take it personally lass. Brok here's just sensitive since he became blue from touching raw silver without gloves." Mimir explained, hoping to calm the fire.

" How the hell else am I supposed to know what the silver wants to be if I don't touch it raw?" Brok then saw all the books up for trade. " Hey, what you want to trade for one of these?" He then reached into a bag he had with him and brought out a knife with gold embroidered on the blade. " This good enough for that thick one there?" He points to the History of Equestria.

Dumbstruck, Twilight threw the book at him and levitated the knife to her. " Oh my gosh, Bob will love this!"

" Brok, I never knew you had an interest in history?"

" I don't. The shitbox over here is out of toilet paper and this is plenty thick enough. Had one too many black bean burritos." This made Twilight go wide-eyed and I think I heard her mind break.

Trying to change the subject, I made the introductions. " Anyway. Girls, this is Brok, the dwarven smith that created the weapons and armor of the gods, even Frostbite. Brok, this is Twilight Sparkle, the Princess of Friendship and the element of magic. And this delightfully pink pony, is Pinkie Pie, the element of laughter, and the best party planner in Equestria."

Brok went over to Twilight and inspected her. " Yer an alicorn. I only know three alicorns, and one of them is buried in an eternal garden in Asgard."

" Brok, there's four." Brok turned to Mimir once he heard that. " Through the centuries, Celestia had a blood-line that led to another alicorn, her niece, Cadance."

" And a bastard nephew who got what was coming to him."

" Shut it, brother! Anyway, that made three alicorns with Miss Sparkle ascending to be the fourth."

" Thought as much, speaking of which, where are Faust's two ankle-biters? Uncle Brok has been meaning to show them something for a while now."

" Well... Celestia is in Canterlot, probably overseeing some Day Court business. As for Luna, she's at home with the kids." This caused Broks side grin to fade and turn into a frown.

He stomped over to me and jabbed a finger at me. " So not only did you take Faust's weapon, but you're also fucking her youngest daughter!?" That caught the attention of the ponies in the surrounding area, causing a few mothers to usher their children away.

" First off, keep it down. Second, Luna, Jackie, and I are happily married trio. So, what we do in the bedroom, or any place that has a lock, is none of your concern."

" Well excuse me if I still see them as the two fillies that would play around my forge. Although, they would always mess up a project of mine. Anyway, these the only ones you want me to see?" He pointed over to Twi and Pinks.

" Nah, we still got a few more to see. Twilight, Pinkie, good luck with your trades and we'll see you soon." They waved us goodbye while we kept looking around. While we kept walking, I had a few questions to ask of the dwarf. " So tell me Brok. Exactly what materials do you look for in this realm?"

" Just the odd thing here and there, thunderclouds, the red and yellow from rainbow water, sometimes I'll catch a break and someone will have the breath of a Timberwolf."

" What can you make with the breath of a Timberwolf?"

" Nothing, I just like to open it up next to Sindri and make him gag." He started laughing while scratching his ass, not caring who saw him.

While he kept chuckling, I saw a booth with a bunch of adventure-themed items, and in the middle, was the very book Dash was looking for. " Oh, this ought to be good." I directed Brok over to the booth and I went and talked to the mare in charge of the booth. " Excuse me, but what're you willing to trade for that book there?"

At first, she was shocked to see me and Brok, but then she got clarity. " Well, at first I wanted that Orthros over there." She pointed over to the booth across the way, where a stallion was selling all kinds of beasts. " But after watching it for the last few hours, I think I'll settle for something else."

I looked around her booth and saw that she liked to collect things that pertain to adventure and Daring Do. This gave me an idea and I rummaged through my dimension bag. " would you trade that book for.... this?" I went and plopped my trade item on the counter, waiting for a verdict.

" What the hell is that!?" She screeched as she pointed at the lopped-off nose.

" This my dear is the nose of Ahuizotl, Arch-nemesis of Daring Do, and it was cut off by my son, Orion." Her eyes grew to the size of dinner plates " So, do we have a deal?" She threw the book at me before picking the nose off the table. " Alright, good doing business with you." I pocketed the book and left the mare to worship her newly acquired nose.

As we passed the beasts, Brok had me stop for a moment. "One-moment Shit-bag. I wanna take a look at this two-headed son of a bitch." Brok went up to the dog and it started barking and growling at him. " Shut the fuck up you little bastard!" The dog quickly stopped and sat down.

The guy running the operation came out to see what was going on. " What's with all the racket out here?" He then sees that Brok was taming the Orthros. " Wow, I thought that yellow pegasus was the only one that could control him." Guess Shy was here already.

" You just gotta show 'em whose boss." Brok then fished out a slab of meat and held it for the two-headed mutt. " Tell me, how much weight can this thing carry?" He asked the stallion while the Orthros took the offered treat.

" Well, he was able to drag most of these cages here, and he did just snap those iron chains."

" Good enough for me. What do you want for 'em?"

" Well, I told this pegasus that I'd trade him for a new lamp."

" A lamp? I can do you one better than that." Brok reached into his bag and fished out a clear ball with a silver core in the middle. " Here, tap on this ball twice, and it'll light up the darkest cave." He tapped the ball, and it glowed with a bright glow. " So, I'll trade ya this for that mutt." The stallion agrees and takes the ball while handing the leash to Brok.

While we continued our journey through the Exchange, Brok rode on the Orthros' back. " So, what do you plan on naming him."

" How 'bout Fuckin' Gratitude? Yeah, this head will be Fuckin', and this one will be Gratitude." It seemed a little fucked up, but the Orthros seemed to like the name, or at least the ear scratches from Brok.

" Charming." As we kept walking, I spotted Jackie and Rarity in the middle of the walk-way, and they looked like they were at odds with each other. " Hey, Rarity, Darling. What seems to be the problem?" When they both looked in my direction, they looked a little shocked at seeing a blue Dwarf on an Orthros. " Right, quick rundown, this is Brok, master craftsman, and his Orthros. He knew Luna and Celestia back when they lived in Asgard, and is here to trade his wares." Brok grunted and gave a half-assed wave.

" Howdy."

" Charmed. Anyway, the problem is, Applejack and I have both found a vintage item that requires all the stuff we brought to trade, but we're at odds on who should get it."

" I see, well, why don't we go and see if we can't negotiate some sort of deal?" We made our way to the booth with the thing Rarity wanted. " So, what did you want?" She pointed over to a brooch on display. " Correct me if I'm wrong, but don't you have the same exact brooch on your bag?" I pointed over to the brooch on her bag for emphasis.

" Actually, it ain't." Brok got off his pet and went over to the displayed jewelry. He picked up the jewelry and inspected it. He smelled it and gave it a small bite before throwing it back on the table. " Don't bother with this piece of crap, it's made with glass jewels and a shoddy weld job." Rarity looked devastated and flashed the stallion running the booth a dirty look before turning away.

Jackie went over to comfort her. " I'm sorry Rares. Maybe we can find something else that catches your eye?"

" I suppose, but let's go ahead and get what you want."

" I don't know Rares. I mean, after finding out about your find, it wouldn't be fair to get what I found after that." Fair to the end. That's my Jackie. Jackie then looked over to Brok. " Thank ya, for helping with our predicament."

" Eh, nothing to it lady. Now, where can we get some grub?" He went over to the kiosk selling oat-burgers with his Orthros in tow.

" That actually sounds like a good idea." I gave a kiss to Jackie and a wave to Rarity before joining Brok over at the kiosk to get a bite.

While we waited in line, I heard the familiar voice of my speedster friend, and she sounded pissed. " What in the hell!?" Dash and Flutters raced over to us and for some reason, had a stone chicken with them. She saw Brok and went ballistic. " What are you doing with that Orthros!? I needed that mutt to trade for a first edition Daring Do book. Joe, who is this blue midget!?" I put up my hands not wanting to be a part of this.

This made Brok pissed off as well. " Who you calling midget, you walking, flying gay pride billboard!?" I had to do my best to not outright laugh at the banter between these two blue beings. " I made a fair trade for this two-headed bastard! If you couldn't come up with the trade, then you can kiss my hairy blue ass!" That comment looked like it was about to start a fight between the two.

Luckily for everyone else, I was there to stop it. " Alright, enough! Dash, I'm sorry, but Brok here was able to trade for the Orthros before you. And as for your plan to get the book you wanted." I reached into my bag and showed her the book. " I have it right here." The look on her face was priceless. " So. What do you have to trade for it?"

Dash shook off her stupor and brought forth the chicken. " All I got now is this stone chicken."

" I'll take it. It'll be great for a rock-hard cock joke." I gave her the book while I put my cock away. " So, I believe introductions are needed. Rainbow Dash, Fluttershy, this is Brok, master blacksmith and apparently an old friend of Tia and Lulu's."

Shy came up and made proper introductions. " Hello Brok, it's nice to meet you." She stuck her hoof out for a shake, which Brok was indifferent about.

Regardless, he took her hoof and gave it a shake. " Nice to meet you, I guess?" He then turned to Dash with a scowl. " As for you, you're short-tempered and foul-mouthed!" His scowl then became a smirk. " Reminds me of me actually. Maybe we can share a drink, on you." Dash rolled her eyes before giving him a hoof bump. After the intros were made, Brok noticed the line was getting shorter. " Oh fucking finally, this shit stream is moving!" Dash and Flutters departed while Brok and I grabbed a bite.

After we grabbed a bite, consisting of an oat patty, we made our way back to Broks booth. When we made it back, Swagger and Spike were waiting by the stall. " Swagger, Spike, how goes the hunt?" They both looked to us and quirked an eye at Brok. " Right. Brok, Swagger, and Spike. Swagger and Spike, Brok." They gave a quick wave before turning back to me. " So, find anything good?"

Swagger pointed to some of the stuff hanging from Brok's booth. " Sort of, just waiting on the guy to come back so I can try and trade."

" Then this is your lucky day Fuck-stick." Brok got of his new pet and brought him in the booth with him. " Alright, my pretty face is here, what caught your eye?"

Ignoring the insult, Swagger brought out his ghillie suit. " I'm interested in that karambit you got hanging there." The karambit he was pointing to had an ivory white handle and the blade itself was pitch black. " So, I'll trade you my camo for it."

Brok looked at the suit and sneered at it. " Forget it. I got no use for camo, besides, it smells like pure ass." Before Brok could detest the camo anymore, the Orthros came up behind him and started wagging his tail while sniffing the ghillie suit. " Hey, you overgrown fuzz-ball, get the hell off me." The two-headed dog was deaf to his protests as he kept trying to get to the suit while drooling on Brok. " Alright, fine! Give me the suit before this thing starts humping me!" Swagger handed him the suit, where Brok then quickly threw it to the corner where the Orthros followed and proceeded to chew on it.

Brok wiped the drool off his person before getting the knife and sheath and giving it to Swagger. " Here, one knife made from the tooth of a sea-serpent. It'll slice through flesh and bone like butter and has a paralyzing thrust." Swagger admired the knife while giving it a few test slashes. With Swagger taken care of, Broke turned to Spike. " What about you, you overgrown gecko?"

Spike huffed green flames from his nose before pulling out some arrows he got from Herot. " I was hoping to trade a few of these for some elemental arrows, and I was hoping this stall had a few."

Brok turned to his left and brought out a quiver of arrows that had multi-colored arrows in them, ranging from red, yellow, blue, and orange. " Alright, the red arrows are incendiary arrows that catch whatever it hits on fire. The yellow arrows give off an electric shock that stuns a target for at least five minutes. These blue ones act like Dog-breaths ax here, they freeze a target for about an hour or so. Finally, these orange arrows explode on impact with a blast radius of thirty feet." Brok then points to Spikes arrows. " How about this, you give me those arrows and quiver, plus some of your flame breath, and they're yours."

Spike looked quizically at Brok while handing him his quiver. " Here, but I don't know you're gonna get my dragon breath?" To answer his question, Brok brought out a large glass vial, lined with grey metal around the mouth and bottom. " A vial? My breath will shatter that thing."

" The smell maybe, but not the flame." This made Swagger and me let out a small chortle. " This vial is made from sand from the beaches of Helheim and heated by the fires of Musphelheim, forming an indestructible vial and can contain almost anything." He then jams the bottle into Spike's mouth. " Now cough it up!"

Spike grabbed the flask and gave Brok the stink eye before blowing a good amount of green flame into the vial. " How's that?" He asked while giving the vial back.

Brok examined the vial and arrows before giving Spike his new arsenal. " There you go, kid. By the way, where did you get these arrows? They look familiar somehow." He told us while examining the arrows.

" Those arrows you got there, they were forged in Herot by the best Diamond Dog blacksmith we got." At the mention of Diamond Dog, Brok became very interested. " I take it you remember them?"

" Of course I do. Those mutts were the best at digging up gems and ore for us dwarves to smelt and craft. So, you say they have their own little kingdom now?"

" Indeed. As a matter of fact, you're talking to their king." Instead of being impressed he just spits on the ground behind the stall. " Right."

" Sorry, it's just that compared to some others I've met, you don't rank very high." That kind of hurt, then I remembered that some of the people he encountered were the gods themselves. " Anyway, what about you? You feel like getting something besides horseshoes?"

After giving it some thought and knowing who I was really dealing with, I came up with the perfect request. " How about a couple of shields? Ones that can collapse and can be hidden."

" Heh, and here I thought you'd give me a challenge." He reaches under his stall and brings out two shields.

" There you go, two shields that can collapse and appear once you make a fist." I took one of the shields and grabbed the handle. It didn't have a strap so I had to hold it by the handle, luckily that gives it more mobility and it can be used for a weapon. There was a button on the handle and when I pushed it, the shield collapsed and formed into a band around my left wrist. When I made another fist, the shield appeared again. " Better than you hoped for?"

" Yes, it is. But now I ask, what is the price for these tools of war?" Hopefully, not too high, I really want one for myself.

" Tell you what, I'll give you these two in exchange for housing in your kingdom."

" Really? Don't you have your own home in Svalterhiem?"

" My home is the forge. Besides, I won't be able to take Fucking Gratitude with me, what with the Bifrost not being connected to this dump yet." He said while giving his dog a bone he had with him. " In addition, I want to work my own forge there. Who knows, maybe I'll become your new forge master?"

" Like I need to be asked twice, you're hired!" He smirked before spitting in his hand and shoving it towards me. Wanting to make this official, I spat on my hand and took his hand in mine. " Welcome to the kingdom of Herot."

" Fan-fucking-tastic!" He let go of my hand before gesturing to all his stuff. " Now, how about you help me lug all this crap to the train?" I noticed that the sun had almost gone down and it was almost time for the Exchange to end.

" Sure, why not." Spike, Swagger, Brok, and I gathered all the weapons and armor from the stall before heading to the train station. Once we made it there, Jackie and the girls were waiting for us while showing off their items. " Well, it seems you six were able to get what you were looking for."

" Darn right we did." Jackie brought out a pie tin that was a bit rusty. " I was able to find another pie tin that will cook a pie a whole minute faster than the pie tins we have at home."

" That's nice dear, course there's only one pie I care about," I told her while giving her flank a smack. She yelped and gave me a dirty look. " Oh don't pretend you didn't like that."

" Yes, well, I was able to find a piece of jewelry that will complement a dress I've been designing quite well." She brings out a pin with what looks like a blue diamond.

" Ohh, that looks lovely Rarity." Fluttershy complimented the jewelry while bringing out a whistle shaped like a bird. " After Joe helped Rainbow get her book, I was able to trade my bear call for this cute bird call." She went ahead and gave it a blow, letting out the beautiful song of a bird. When it was done, a couple of birds landed on her back.

" Wow! That's super effective." Pinkie popped out of Twilights books, making the birds flying away. " I wasn't able to find anything, and... I might've botched Twilights chances at trading her books, well except for Brok."

" Speaking of, I have an announcement. Brok here is staying to become Herot's master blacksmith."

Before the girls could offer their congratulations, Brok moved past us with his Orthros getting slobber on everyone. " Yeah, yeah, warm fuzzies all around. Now move aside, I got a shit brewing that could choke an ass. Luckily I still got my shit paper." He flashed the history book he traded for Twilight while heading for the crapper. Twilight started to freak out and chased him so the book wouldn't be defiled.

I shook my head before turning to the others. " A bit rough around the edges, but a valuable asset, and who knows, he might turn into a good friend." We suddenly heard Twilight scream in front of the men's room, no doubt begging Brok to reconsider. " Eventually."

Author's Note

Sorry, it took me so long, but I feel that it was needed to bring in a new yet familiar character. Anyway, only a few small chapters away before the great threat to all.

Clip.

Another.