Threshold

Nightwhisper lives above a gas station. I suppose that means I live above a gas station, as well, though I don’t like that thought. There isn’t anything less pleasant, pretty, or homey than a gas station.

The light was still on over the self-service pump, a beacon which may have been called angelic under different circumstances. Nightwhisper and his crew made decent money, being that they were the only station around for miles in every direction. The ubiquitousness of the new gas-powered vehicles (auto-carriages, as I had heard them called once before) still baffled me, in all honesty. Strange machines in a strange place at a strange time. It made me so uneasy.

I circled around the back of the station to the fire escape, the only access to the lean-to on top which Nightwhisper called home. It was barely even a dwelling, but ‘home?’ He he strange ideas of most things. I have never known a pony to be attached to a place like this. Then again, Nightwhisper seemed to be attached to very little.

No matter how lightly I stepped, the metal framework always rattled and clanged under my hooves. It wasn’t yet rusty, but the wrought iron sometimes screeched with contact like claws down a chalkboard. I winced with every calculated step I took, pausing on the landing to listen for movement.

“Rarity?” Nightwhisper called. “That you?”

I cleared my throat. “Y-yes, it’s me! I’m back!” I hurried up the second flight of stairs with quick trots.

He didn’t come to the door. He never came to the door.

I pushed against the frail wood and into the tiny apartment beyond. It felt as though I hadn’t been here in years, somehow, and yet the place showed no signs of change. Not dirty, exactly, but certainly not up to the standards of living which I used to adhere to so rigidly. Minimal furnishings, everything pale shades of colors which might have been beautiful in the right light. It seemed as though I viewed the entire world through a grey lense— it was all dingy, pallid, and lifeless.

Nightwhisper sat on the sofa to my left, his form as unchanged as the rest of the scenery. Not exactly out of shape, but not exactly in shape either; he was lounging over the couch like some sort of aging celebrity, the tiniest hint of a cider pouch melting into the upholstery.

“You were gone a while. Where were you?” he asked.

I shook my head. “Just got held up at the Kwik-Grab.”

He peered at me, almost squinting but not quite. “Held up doing what?”

“Just held up,” I said, excusing myself to the tiny kitchen at the back of the apartment. As I unwrapped the sandwich to prepare it, I heard Nightwhisper roll off the couch and come clodding in behind me.

He sighed deeply, clumsily disguising a belch. “What are you doing?”

“They didn’t have what you wanted so I had to get you something else. I’m fixing it up for you now,” I explained, my voice low and unassuming.

The stallion towered behind me, his breath heavy on my cheek and smelling of booze. After a moment’s hesitation, he leaned down to give me a sloppy kiss on the cheek interrupted by brutish stubble. “Thanks, babe.”

Ugh. Babe.

I so delicately scooped the falafel patties out of the sandwich, leaving a gaping void between the roll and filling. Nightwhisper never noticed the lack of filling, though. I crushed the roll closed over the meager portion, sliced the sandwich down the middle, and carried it back out to the stallion waiting in the living room. He took it without looking me in the eye.

My dignity officially wiped away for the night, I sat on the couch next to Nightwhisper. He munched on the sandwich without an ounce of thankfulness towards me, just staring at the wall and looking moderately pleased with the quality of his meal. Before I knew it, it was gone.

“I’m going out. Thunder Wing’s expecting me,” Nightwhisper muttered. He struggled to his hooves. “Don’t get into any trouble.”

He left, the thin wooden door clapping shut behind him.

I let out a breath and sank back into the couch. For a good minute or two I just sat there with a hoof on my chest, trying to calm my heartbeat and process the day’s events. I was already having trouble remembering what had happened with Rainbow Dash… was it a memory of her back in Ponyville? Had she really been there with me? Both? Neither?

There was such a strange, dream-like feeling following me lately. A haze which disguised truths and made even the most familiar things seem foreign to me. I had found myself barely able to distinguish days from one another, weeks from one another… it all seemed to be getting away from me so quickly. When was the last time I had sewn something? The last time I’d thought about seams and hems and a needle and thread. It all felt so far away; like another life I had lived in some happier world.

My eyes drifted closed for a moment and I breathed deeply, the musty scent of the cool sands mingling with the poisonously alcoholic odor of the gasoline. The buzz of the fluorescent. The chatter of cicadas. My own babbling thoughts all faded to static-filled snow at the back of my skull. The silence closed in around me, and I started to feel warm and safe.

“I’m waiting for you!” called out through time and space and eternity.

I opened my eyes. “I am Rarity. Today is Thursday. I am alive.”

The buzzing sensation in my skull dispersed. Strangely, though, it seemed to refocus between my eyes, growing and growing in intensity as I tried to shake my head and clear it away. When I finally looked in the right direction, it stopped immediately.

Through the window which overlooked the gas station I could see a light flickering. I sat forward a bit, watching the light cut in and out, in and out. It was difficult to see from this angle, but it looked like there was a figure standing at the pump. It wasn’t touching it, just standing nearby, the unnatural lighting casting sharp shadows across its face and an equally imposing shape on the ground. A slinking sensation of deja vu crept over me as the shape turned its head to look directly at me, then darted away as fast as it could.

“Hey!” I shouted, jumping to my hooves. “Who’s out there?”

I scrambled to the door, throwing it open with a bang and sprinting out onto the fire escape. Down one flight, colliding with the rail on the landing, then down the other flight and I was sprinting across the pavement in the direction of the darting figure. It had run out into the desert, and all-out dash which seemed impossible.

The light from the gas station lit my way for a few yards, then cut out entirely with a great mechanical groaning sound. With that light now gone, I saw something new: a dimmer light, with a green hue, peeking out from behind the butte which overhung the town. That had to be it. That’s where the figure went.

My gallops became easier and easier the closer I got to the light. I felt as though I was running on air, across clouds or mist.

As I rounded the butte, the source of light greeted me with sarcastic glee. The sagging and vine-covered shopping center, the one which sprung right out of the ground in the Everfree forest. Sand ran from its sloping surfaces with the speed of a faucet. This building had truly risen from the ground mere moments before.

“Hello?” I called. No echo. The air was so still here it seemed unreal. Even with light pouring from every pinhole in the building, nothing near me cast a shadow.

Steeling myself, I marched towards the building as if I expected it to march back. The automatic front door of the building was wedged in the open position, and I simply stepped over the threshold and into the vestibule beyond it.

The wave of warmth I felt was indescribable. It was the most real I had felt in Celestia knows how long — and I’m not even entirely sure what I mean by that. I forgot about the chase entirely. The feeling of cold tile on my hooves and lush greenery brushing against my legs was enchanting. I felt drunk with the light which flowed over me as I drifted through the grand room with the high ceiling.

It was then that I saw her. A burst of bright cyan in amongst all things green, she stood on the upper level with her wings spread. The green light through her blue feathers looked like stained glass.

“Rainbow!” I said, breathless.

Her ear pricked at the sound, and she looked back over her shoulder at me. “Rarity?”

I lost all words as Rainbow turned to look at me, her wings folding to her sides with the halted motions of a young filly who had been caught doing something she shouldn’t have been. Her eyes were wide, glittering… but at the same time veiled with a milkiness that I couldn’t understand or place.

“Where the hell did you go?” I demanded.

“Rares, I—” Rainbow started.

I scoffed. “I can’t believe you! Coming back after a year of nothing, saving my life and giving me a stupid sandwich, and then just disappearing again!”

Rainbow’s ears flattened against her head.

“Where did you go?” I repeated. “Where in the hell did you go?”

Rainbow vaulted the rail and fluttered down to meet me. “Rarity, I can explain.”

She stood before me, her chest heaving with tears uncried and, worse, a fear that I would reject her for good.

I grabbed her with both hooves and pulled her into my chest. “Don’t you leave me again.” She stiffened at the touch, unsure of how to react. Her fur was soft and prickly, but it meshed with mine ever so neatly as I embraced her with all I had.

The tears came again, and this time I knew they wouldn’t stop for anything. “Don’t you ever leave me again, Rainbow Dash.”

Rainbow ever so slowly unfurled her wings and sheltered us both under them. A tiny sanctuary in this unfamiliar and yet so familiar place. She leaned into me, her cheek rubbing my neck as she settled into the hug. I could feel tears running down my face, tracing my jaw before dripping down into her mane. She seemed to shiver as I held her, her own silent way of crying the tears she had to cry.

When the last of my tears ran out, Rainbow pulled away and nuzzled under my chin. “Rares, I’m sorry.”

I didn’t ask what for. She knew it was for whatever I needed. It was an apology for everything.

“I’m sorry, too,” I said. “I’ve missed you so much.”

Rainbow pressed into me a little further. “I’ve missed you too.”

“So many strange things have been happening,” I said, adjusting my head to rest on top of Rainbow’s. “Just the past day has been so odd. Least of all this building. Do you know anything about this?”

Rainbow stirred. “N-no… I came in here because I heard somepony.”

“You heard a voice?” I held Rainbow out at arm’s length. “I heard one too. What did it say?”

She looked down at the floor and rolled her shoulders in a half-hearted shrug. “I dunno, I couldn’t really make out any words. What did yours say?”

“It said…” I had to focus for a moment to bring the words back to me. “It said ‘I’m waiting for you.’”

Rainbow squinted at me. “What do you think that means?”

I shook my head. “I wish I knew. The voice sounded so familiar, too… I wish I could place it but I just…”

Remembering anything from the times with the buzzing was like trying to remember a dream. The harder I focused, the more it slipped away from me. Had I not told Rainbow what the voice had said to me, I would have certainly forgotten that by now.

“Should you be going somewhere? Where are you staying?” I asked.

“Oh! Uh…” Rainbow’s eyes flicked around the room. “I’m staying at the motel?”

“Ugh…” I grimaced. “That is not a nice place, darling. Make sure you keep your bits on you.”

Rainbow chuckled. “Will do, boss.”

Silence fell between us, but not an unbearable one. This silence was warm and loving, just like that omnipresent light of the shopping center. We walked with patient, careful steps across the courtyard of a room to the broken-down escalators and dried-up fountain. After admiring the massive quantities of bits discarded at the bottom of the fountain, we found a spot on the rim which was empty of shrubbery and made ourselves comfortable.

“So how about this place, hm?” I said. “Believe it or not, this is the second time I’ve seen it. Although I can’t quite remember if the first time was a dream, or if…”

The memory flared, flickered, and fizzled before I could capture any part of it.

“Are you doing okay, Rares?” Rainbow asked. There was a genuine concern in her voice. “Like, really okay? You’re not acting like yourself.”

I closed my eyes to consider the question. “This is me. This is how I’ve been for months now, I’m just growing and changing.”

“But you’ve been with that Nightwhisper guy for months, right?” Rainbow asked in a low voice. Her implications were clear.

“I don’t know why you’re so quick to blame him,” I said. “You’ve never met him. You don’t know anything about him.”

Rainbow looked up at me, her eyes shimmering in the otherworldly green light. “Yeah, but I know what I’ve been like the past few months and it’s definitely not me.”

“You keep saying things like that.” I tossed my head to throw a lock of mane out of my eyes. “You’re loyalty, Rainbow. Loyalty means loyal to yourself, too. As long as I’ve known you, you’ve never changed for anypony.”

Rainbow swallowed hard. “Well, you’re generosity. And as long as I’ve known you, you’ve never given anypony anything they don’t deserve.”

I chuckled. “When did you get so wise, Rainbow?”

“Probably that past year we keep mentioning,” Rainbow said, laughing.

I laughed with her for a moment. The sound was clean and clear, ringing back from the fountain with a peculiar tone.

“So… Nightwhisper?” Rainbow asked as our laughter faded.

I chewed my lip thoughtfully. “He’s not a bad pony.”

Rainbow peered up at me, her eyes wide and vibrant. “But?”

“Well, I don’t know,” I said. “Maybe he--”

The buzzing was back. It came back so quickly and violently that I couldn’t finish my thought, just throw my head back in pain. Rainbow grabbed my shoulders, shaking me gently and I think calling my name, though I could barely hear her voice over the buzzing.

My eyes drifted shut, snapped open, drifted shut again. The light of the shopping center grew brighter and brighter and at last I had to shield my eyes against it. As soon as my hooves met my face, the light dimmed completely. I lowered my hooves slowly, peeking over them in fear of what I might see.

I was still in the shopping center, but the light was gone, as was Rainbow Dash. The greenery was much thicker now, intertwined with every bit of the structure as though they were the very veins of the building. This shopping center was different, though. Here there were signs of storefronts and shoppers everywhere, long since gone. An abandoned stroller here, a dead neon sign there; the lack of real, true life in this place made my skin crawl. All that was left was plants choking each wire and coating every inch of the place.

Outside the windows was darkness. The buzzing? Cicadas. I wasn’t fast enough to realize that this was the version of the shopping center in the Everfree, and I heard the figure dart away before I could spot them.

“Come back!” I shouted in vain. “Come back! Who are you?”

The sound of the cicadas swelled in my ears, clustering in the back of my skull and building to impossible volume.

“I’m waiting for you!” called out through time and space and eternity.

I closed my eyes and ducled my head, throwing both hooves over it in an attempt to defend myself against the unendurable screaming in my mind. “I am Rarity! It is Thursday and I am alive!”

“Rarity!” Rainbow screamed.

The buzzing stopped, and my every muscle was finally able to relax. I was in the fetal position on the ground, my hooves clamped over my ears in a feeble attempt to stop the noise which seemed to come from inside of me. Rainbow was beside me. She had her hoof on my side, gently shaking me to get a response.

“Oh, Celestia, Rarity!” Rainbow shook me a little firmer.

I shushed her weakly. “I’m okay, I’m okay.”

Rainbow choked out a little sob and fell down onto to me in a powerful embrace. “I thought you were having a seizure, but then you yelled… I didn’t know what to do…”

“I’m alright, darling. Everything is okay.”

“How can you say that?” Rainbow sat up. “It’s not true, even I know that.”

I rolled onto my back. “You’re right. You’re smarter than you give yourself credit for, Rainbow Dash.”

“So then… what’s wrong?” She sniffled lightly.

I shook my head, not wanting to admit it. Just one word, but it seemed stuck in my throat.

“You can tell me,” Rainbow said. She rested her hoof on my shoulder, and I felt a tingling warmth spread through me.

“I know,” I said. “Nightwhisper. It’s Nightwhisper.”