Author's Note

Yes I know it's not original but it's mine and I've been putting up with shit from this stupid story for years so I might as well rewrite it.

Journal Entry #1

Why do most stories always have a prologue? Sometimes, you just don't know what the series of events to kickstart a story even is. I sure as fuck didn't, my name is Michael Young but my close friends always called me Mickey, I don't know why that would be an acceptable nickname, people always make fucking disney jokes. Oh, hi Mickey Mouse how are you today? Shit like that, I used to always say that my nickname was based off Mickey Mantle, the famous baseball player except I know jack shit about baseball and can't throw a curveball to save my fucking life. Now I'm kinda glad I'm in Equestria since My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic is owned by Hasbro I won't hear any hide nor hair of the mouse. I will miss marvel movies though, also yeah I know I'm basically in a cartoon. I say basically because I don't think that the show about ponies had huge tits in them. I wound up in some whack-job alternate universe of the show. I live in the everfree forest, I have a cabin I built myself and this is basically a journal of all the things I experience here.

Twilight said it would be good for me to keep a journal, help me keep up some routine to keep me grounded in some type of reality. I fucking hate this, at least I showed her what the marvels of a pencil was, that was one of the first things I did. She was shocked that you could erase something you had written before, although I'm pretty sure I've seen pencils around here before. She's just a huge child sometimes, I think I'm getting ahead of myself here. I'm a caucasian male I'm very well built after all the Marine Corps. wouldn't let someone ship out unless they were combat ready, I'm 5'11 and weigh 232 lbs. I have straight brown hair that curls when it gets long enough, why did I write that down? Whatever, it's useless filler anyways.

So now is the point where I tell about how I got to equestria or this version of it anyways. Here's the thing, I don't know how I got here. No one does, even Discord, the god of chaos says that my presence here is a complete mystery. Fine, if I'm gonna be in a different world. Okay then, doesn't change anything about me. Not really, although I can't really receive any benefits from being in the military. I was a Corporal, didn't have much in the line of responsibilities but I made the best of what I had. Like I always do, anyways Princess Celestia proposed something to me. It's apparent that the male population is at an all time low, and they want me to help. I consented to having them run a few tests but that was the extent of that, they also gave me a few injections for what they said will help me with the presence of magic, bottom line is I don't need horse women lining up at my door every day asking to bang, if I need any sexual release I'll go knock on the door of Zecora, she has birth control potions. I found all of this out later when she caught me staring at my overly abundant junk which I knew wasn't like that a few weeks ago.

I have some resentment for Princess Celestia now, she lied to me about those shots. Help me with the presence of magic my left asscheek. She wanted me to bang as many of her oh so precious ponies as possible and I don't like being lied to. Then again why should have I expected anything less, she's a master chess player and I'm a wildcard that was thrown onto her game of roulette.

She wants to use me, maybe that's one of the reasons I chose to live in the everfree forest no one goes in there unless they need to, with Zecora and I being the exceptions. That or it's the closest thing to home I'll ever get back to, the weather is crazier than Jim Carrey meeting Gary Busey and that's just fine. I built the cabin myself over the span of 2 years and then had Twilight enchant it to make sure that Luna would never be able to enter my dreams when she asked me why I told her that there are some things that ponies are never meant to see, and some things never meant to be resolved until I'm much older and wiser.

I have dreams about Iraq and Afghanistan, things that haunt me until the day they put me into the ground. I'll talk about that later, now's not the time. I work for Applejack and Mac, I don't call him Big Mac because it would just remind me of a cheeseburger, they put me to work with manual labor and things like that. It gives me a decent income to live off of, I told the six girls about my dietary needs and that while I will be able to eat most of the things they eat, minus the flowers of course that I will need a constant supply of meat. Fluttershy understood, after all she has a bear for a pet. I wanted to put him in a tiny red shirt and give him a jar with the word 'hunny' on it but she wouldn't let me.

So that's basically it, my existence in equestria in a nutshell, but I have this feeling that thing are going to get a lot more complicated as I continue to write this. I was put here for some unknown reason and I'm going to find out what, hell it may kill me. But if I find out why I was here at least I'll get some closure. That's all I really want closure on something. So as I sit here writing this stupid thing I've got to wonder. Why?