Royal Guard Academy

Tempest figured nothing could get worse than chow runner at this point. So if she heard something simple, she might just volunteer for it before something odd comes up.

“Alright trainees, now I want you to be honest with me,” Eagle said, lifting a clipboard and setting a pen to it. “These questions will help me determine what job you’re best suited for. So tell me, did any of you like to play soldier as a filly? It’s alright, no judgment right now.”

They hesitated, then a few mares raised their hooves. Tempest shrugged and did too.

Eagle looked around, then said, “Great! So!” She pointed at that small pegasus who had been at the front of the first element that morning. “You will be the first spear monitor! And you!” She pointed at a beige unicorn with a short russet mane and tail. “You will be her buddy, spear monitor two! Oho, that’s a big job. What’s your names?”

“Ma’am, Trainee Blue Horizon reports as ordered,” Blue replied.

“Ma’am, Trainee Dream Walker reports as ordered.”

Eagle Eye wrote their names down, then said, “Dream Walker? How’d you get that name?”

“Ma’am, my parents just thought it… felt right. Like many parents do when they first see their foal.”

“I see. What’s your special talent?”

Dream looked at her cutie mark for a moment, which looked like a sort of thought bubble surrounded by little stars. Then she said, “Ma’am, my control over magic is fairly weak for a unicorn but I’ve found I can have completely lucid dreams at will and can even cross into the dreams of other ponies, where I can help ease their troubles.”

That got impressed noises from the others, but Eagle looked skeptical. “Really? So… you have the same magical power as Princess Luna?”

“No, ma’am, it’s not quite the same. Princess Luna can completely control a pony’s dreams, shifting things around, bringing multiple dreamscapes together if needed. All I can do is walk around in a pony’s existing dream and watch, and talk to them if they’re willing to listen. They have to do all the dream control themselves.”

“I see. Has Luna met you?”

Dream blushed. “Yes, ma’am, she has. She noticed my talent very quickly and has helped guide me in applying my talent effectively. I sometimes see her in person too, she likes checking up on me. She saw how much I want to protect others, and she recommended I join the Guard.”

“That’s a cute story, Trainee Dream. But don’t think having Luna’s favor gets you any favor from me. You gotta prove yourself. So you are a spear monitor!” Eagle gestured for them to approach her. They did, and she explained, “This job’s very important. You will maintain accountability over the flight’s assigned weapons.”

That got some interested looks.

“Got your attention, didn’t I? But don’t get too excited. You’re all getting issued training spears. Not sharp, made of rubber instead of metal, but the same shape and weight of a real one. And you can still hurt somepony if you stab them hard enough. Each spear will be inscribed with a serial number. You will each be expected to keep track of your specific spear. No trading them. And the spear monitors? Every day, usually some time after breakfast, you will go to every locker and make sure everypony has their spear. Then you will report to the office downstairs and tell them that all spears are accounted for. They’ll say thanks, and you’ll mosey your happy asses back up here. It’s so simple a foal could do it. In fact we’ll all be going down to the armory to grab our spears tomorrow and then you can really start learning your job. That won’t be your only detail though. You’re still getting something to do in the evenings. Go back to your beds.”

The two went back to their spots.

Eagle consulted her list. “Anypony a neat freak? Gotta have things in order?”

A few hooves went up, including Zinnia’s.

“That’ll come in handy for this next detail. Trainee Zinnia, bed aligner! You, Goldilocks, what’s your name?”

An earth pony with quite bright gold curls said, “Ma’am, Trainee Aurum Zen reports as ordered.”

“Trainee Aurum, bed aligner! Hey fluffy feathers over there, name?”

A pegasus with notably fluffy feathers seemed taken aback at being picked, but she said, “Ma’am, Trainee Cumulus reports as ordered.”

“Cumulus, nice! I love clouds! Bed aligner! Okay hooves down, our lucky few have been chosen.” Eagle spent a few moments writing, then said, “Okay, bed aligners! You get to keep this dorm in order. You will make sure all these beds stay perfectly lined up with each other. All the way down each side, and across the aisle from each other. It should look like a perfect grid from above. And believe me, I will be climbing these lockers to check.”

The trainees glanced unsurely at each other.

Eagle happily moved on. “Next. Who likes laying on a nice, warm couch?”

That got quite a few hooves.

“Who doesn’t? Trainee Ocean, dayroom crew! Trainee Nightshade, yeah I know your name already, made sure I remembered you after you gave me that stinkeye in the chow hall earlier! Dayroom crew!”

“Yes, ma’am,” the two replied.

Nightshade was a unicorn with a nearly black coat and a straight, shiny purple mane. She had a poisonous-looking purple flower for a cutie mark. Tempest remembered hearing her voice as they went through the chow hall for lunch earlier. She had been trying to talk to the pony next to her, who luckily had ignored her. Eagle had yelled at her, and she had apparently given her a dirty look. Oh boy. Every group had at least one, huh?

Eagle asked, “Who lived in a house with stairs as a filly?” She looked around as nearly half the room raised their hooves. “Stairs are good exercise huh? Trainee Lemon Breeze, stairwell crew! And… hm.” She looked closely at a unicorn with a gray coat, orange mane, and accordion cutie mark. “Who’re you?”

“Ma’am, Trainee Reed Concord reports as ordered,” she replied in a mellow voice.

“That so? What’s your schtick? I see that accordion on your flank, you a musician?”

“Ma’am, I’ve had accordion lessons and I’m very good at playing it, and I enjoy it, but I don’t like being in front of crowds so my career never took off. So I figured, I’ll join the Royal Guard.”

“That’s wild. I’m gonna get you over that stage fright and you might just be able to join the Royal Guard Band. So. Stairwell crew!”

“Yes, ma’am.”

“Stairwell crew’s easy, you go out and tidy up our corner of the building and all the stairs down to the third floor landing. Clean the rails, clean the steps. Try not to get trampled. Nice and quiet though.”

Eagle read down her list, tapping her pen against her chin. “Hm… oh, dorm guard monitor… that’s basically just one pony who arranges the schedule for dorm guard duty. Probably the most hated job. As in, everypony else will hate you. Because you won’t be able to please them all. Expect to hear a lot of complaints. You’re gonna stick some pony in the midnight to two AM shift and have to hear, ‘But Traineeee Snuffyyy, I need my beauty sleeep!’ And you’ll have to look them in the eye and say, ‘And I need a million bits’ and tell them we can't all get what we want. Fun fun.” She looked around. “So who wants to be utterly despised… by the way, this isn’t a solo job, you’ll do this along with another detail, so don’t think you’re safe if you’ve already gotten something. Let me look at my trainee roster.” Eagle flipped to another page, scanning names. “I’ve read the application packages from every single one of you, basically tried to familiarize myself with you… but it’s much better to see you all in person. But I think I know the pony for the job. Somepony who apparently played hall monitor at a big school in Fillydelphia. Where’s Trainee Calli Graphi?”

A unicorn with a silver coat and well-styled light blue mane stood. Tempest thought she looked quite similar to Rarity, down to having very thick eyelashes. But her eyes were silver like her coat and her snout was sharp, fitting her haughty expression. “Ma’am, Trainee Calli Graphi reports as ordered.”

Eagle looked her over. “Ah yes. Such a pretty face. A face that’ll be easy to hate. Dorm guard monitor!”

“Yes, ma’am,” she replied with a smile.

“And stop smirking! Military bearing!” Eagle scoffed and wrote her name as Calli sat. “Element leaders and dorm chief, I’ll pick those in a few days once I have time to observe all of you and determine who are the best leaders. Mm mm… you know what, I’m going to even out the numbers for the bed aligners, let me see.” She pointed to a small crimson earth pony that was so quiet Tempest hasn’t really noticed her. “Who are you?”

“My name is-” she started, but was interrupted.

“Ma’am, Trainee what?” Eagle demanded.

“Oh.” The mare went to attention. “Ma’am, Trainee Ruby Luster reports as ordered.”

“Ruby Luster. What did you do before joining the Royal Guard? I see you have a pretty necklace for a cutie mark.”

“Yes, ma’am. My mothers are both jewelers and I took on the trade, and I’m pretty good at it, but it just never felt right for me. I wanted to do something new. So I applied to be an officer of the Royal Guard. But I’ll probably still make and sell jewelry in my free time for extra bits.”

“It’s nice to get a little extra income, hm? I bet you need real steady hooves to make jewelry. So. Bed aligner.”

“Yes, ma’am.”

“Next up, ooh, goodie, hallway crew. You’ll clean up the hallway going to the dayroom and latrine and past my office. I’ll need two of you. You’ll make sure the rugs in the hallway are clean, disinfect the water fountains, and you trainees are bad about leaning on the walls when lining up so hallway crew gets to clean off those scuffs and sweat stains. Where are my spear monitors, put your hooves back up.” They did, and she said, “Blue Horizon, hallway crew. Dream Walker, put your hoof down, I’ll give you something else.” She looked around, and located an earth pony with a warm brown coat and even darker brown mane. “You, the one who looks like you’re covered in mud, what’s your name?”

“Ma’am, Trainee Mudslide reports as ordered,” the mare replied in a bold voice.

“Mudslide, eh? That makes me want rum and cream. Congratulations, hallway crew!”

“Yes, ma’am.”

Eagle hummed as she read what she had so far. “Let’s see. Right, the all important utility room crew. I’ve had that room closed, but I’ll show y’all in a bit. It has a small washer and dryer for washing your armor undershirts, and it’s where all the cleaning supplies, extra coat hangers, toilet paper, and so on is stored. But we go through that stuff fast. So I need two utility crew members to run the washer and dryer, give out supplies, and go down to the office to grab anything we run out of. You’ll refill the cleaning solutions down there too. It’ll probably take up most of your time during details but if you finish and need something else to do, just help out wherever. So who likes the idea of running up and down the stairs constantly?”

No one volunteered.

“If you don’t volunteer I’m picking at random.” Eagle waited a few seconds, then said, “Fine, I’ll pick.” She pointed at two pegasi who looked rather similar and had taken beds next to each other, who had matching forest green coats and swept back, light blonde manes with lime streaks. “Ohh no. Oh no, you’re those twins, aren’t you?”

“Yes, ma’am,” they said in unison.

“Ugh I better not catch you standing next to each other at the end of the hallway! I’m giving you utility crew! I considered separating you but somehow I feel like I’ll regret it. What are your names?”

The first said, “Ma’am, Trainee Pine Glider reports as ordered.”

The other said, “Ma’am, Trainee Spruce Drifter reports as ordered.”

“Oh great. Your parents had no creativity, huh? I’m going to assume they weren’t expecting twins.”

“No, ma’am,” Pine replied.

“Hm. So how am I supposed to tell you apart? Oh wait, get up, let me see your cutie marks. Twin cutie marks are nigh impossible-”

Eagle stopped when they turned to show her their thighs. Pine had a cutie mark of an ascending swirl over a pine tree. Spruce’s was nearly the same except her swirl veered sideways and the tree was slightly taller.

“What. The piss.” Eagle shook her head. “That ain’t right. What’re your talents?”

“Ma’am, we’re experts at tandem flying together,” Pine said. “We used to put on shows all the time.”

“Why didn’t you join the Wonderbolts?”

Spruce answered that one, “We considered it ma’am, but our tricks are showy, not fast. We could never keep up with the Wonderbolts. But we’ve always admired the royal guards, so decided to go for it.”

“Okay then. Is there any other way I can tell you apart?”

Pine and Spruce looked at each other. Pine rubbed her chin. “I think she’s taller.”

“No way, we’re the same height on all our paperwork. Oh, I know!” Spruce pointed to a little scar over Pine’s left eye. “She has a scar here and I don’t!”

“Oh yeah, from when we were fillies and we tried to do an advanced spinning technique and you kicked me in the face accidentally!” They started laughing.

Eagle groaned. “Right. Trainee Pine, you have an eye scar and the little swirly on your cutie mark goes up. And Trainee Spruce, you have no scar and your swirly goes sideways. I’ll manage. Have fun as utility crew.” She wrote their names down and shuddered.

Tempest chuckled. Those twins seemed like an interesting pair. She couldn’t wait to get to know them.

“Moving on,” Eagle said. “Trash crew! Alright, so! This will be two ponies. You’ll take the trash out from my office and the latrine. All the way out and to the dumpster outside. But before you actually go out, you’ll replace the trash bags. Utility crew will keep those stocked. After dropping off the trash, you’ll also go to the patio outside the dorm building and join other trash crews in tidying up the area. There’ll be plenty to do, and once you’re done you’ll report back up and help out wherever you’re needed. Who haven’t I picked on yet… Raise your hooves if I haven’t given you a detail, not counting monitors.”

Eight hooves went up, including Tempest’s.

Eagle looked at all of them, lingering on her for a moment, but then passing as she picked out a unicorn and a pegasus. “Alright, you two haven’t really acknowledged each other yet. Make nice with each other. Give me your names.”

“Ma’am, Trainee Flitter Bug reports as ordered,” the indigo pegasus with a smattering of white spots across her said. Her cutie mark depicted ladybugs with spread wings.

“Ma’am, Trainee Blizzard Blast reports as ordered,” the snow white unicorn said next. The fur around her hooves was especially feathery and she was well-built, probably the next tallest besides Tempest. Her mane was slicked back and gleamed silver.

“Blizzard Blast!” Eagle exclaimed. “That sounds powerful. I see you have icicles for a cutie mark. What’s up with that?”

Blizzard stood. “Ma’am, my specialty is ice magic and I like manifesting snow and building sculptures with it. I come from up north, near Vanhoover. Lots of ponies do things with snow there. I didn’t really want to do what everypony else was doing. So I decided to head south and join the Royal Guard. I actually prefer the weather here.”

“Is that so? Well then. Welcome aboard. You can sit.”

Blizzard sat and Eagle wrote her name along with Flitter’s.

Eagle smiled as she consulted her list. “Well now. If my math is correct, and it usually is, that leaves six of you without a main detail. Which is exactly how many I like to have assigned to the most important detail of all. You ready? Latrine crew!”

Tempest sighed under her breath. Oh well. It’s not like she was a stranger to cleaning bathrooms. The Storm King didn’t make her a commander immediately, she had to work her way up. And his soldiers were disgusting.

“That’s right, trainees. A coveted position. Now I need to see six hooves raised.”

Tempest lifted hers, as did the five others. She noted that Calli was making a face as she put hers up.

Eagle noted them all. “Calli and Dream, I already know your names… let me get you.” She went through them one by one. A unicorn named Fizzy Pop which Tempest found great because that was close to her own birth name. Also, wow there were a lot of unicorns in the flight. But she supposed that made sense, the Royal Guard has always been disproportionately made of Canterlot natives since the Guard had such a presence here, and Canterlot was mostly inhabited by unicorns.

Then there was Storm Gale the pegasus. Spunky, dark gray, a mane of red and lighter gray, with a tornado for a cutie mark. Would probably be great friends with Rainbow Dash, based on what Tempest has seen of her so far.

Another unicorn, aquamarine with a comforting lavender and pink mane, yet her cutie mark was a fencing sword with a ribbon twirling around it. Her name was Sword Dancer.

“Sword Dancer,” Eagle stated. “Explain.”

“Ma’am, I was a fencing champion in school and took private lessons too,” she replied. “But I never fought to harm. I fought for exercise, for companionship, for the simple joy of a hard won fight. I’ve always cared about my opponents and been happy if they beat me, because that meant I had more to learn.”

“So how do you feel about the possibility of having to hurt others?” Eagle asked. “This isn’t a fun competition. As a royal guard, you will be tasked to help defend Equestria wherever you’re needed. Your location may be attacked by other creatures or even angry ponies who will be ready to kill you. Will you kill them first?”

Sword set her expression. “Ma’am, I will never harm the innocent. But yes, I am willing to fight for Equestria. I am willing to defend myself and especially others. And if that means I have to kill, I will do so without hesitation.”

A few of the other trainees whistled.

“I think I love you,” Storm said.

Eagle grinned. “I like what you got, Trainee Sword. Let’s hope you mean it. But for now all I need you to kill is filth. Well then, that just leaves one more. A pony I’ve been just dying to talk to.” Her fierce eyes met Tempest’s, who finally realized they were a striking red that seemed able to stare into her mind. “Tempest Shadow, ex-commander of the Storm King’s army.”