The Nine

When I first woke up, I thought I had just partied hard. It felt like I had a hangover, and I was beginning to think it was, since I couldn’t remember anything, but when I saw where I was, I could only wish it was a hard party. I looked up to see a gigantic purple whatchamacallit. Kiqo, back when we were bored teens, had told me about these things. I always knew he had a vivid imagination, and I was honestly afraid he could possibly be right. That fear, however, was nothing compared to the fear I had standing in its presence. From what I had gathered from what he had told me, this race had a single gender, born with pregnancy sacks, but most of the red ones opted out for wings or mechanical arms. This purple one, much unlike most of the purples, had taken arms. Since Kiqo had described the purple ones very often as female, I could only imagine that this one was either butch, lesbian, or a woman’s right activist.

I had no time to consider that, though. She quickly commanded us to our posts, giving lashings like they were candy. She was rather cruel, whipping even the slightest of slackers back into a lightning pace. She never said anything, just beat the tar out of those too slow for her tastes. Even when we were eating. If we ate too sloppily, we were whipped. Too slow? Whipped. Went for thirds? Whipped. Tried to say anything? All you say is ‘Ow, that whip stung!’. By the end of the day, we were all bloodied, bruised, and exhausted. I didn’t immediately bed down, though.

I had to check on Rory. He was left in the back of the bed cave, given his daily rations of slop. I could only fathom the reason they left him here was so that I’d be happy. It didn’t work, since he was born a pegasus, and would never know what it would be like to fly. I could only know sadness when he looked up at me, wingless. Sure, I was happy he was mostly unharmed, but he would never feel the wind tear through his mane, never feel the sound barrier break. I looked down at him sadly, wishing I could keep the positive outlook that was etched onto his young face. He was a strangely colored colt, but he was my strangely colored colt. I patted him gently on the head before I hit the hay.

I woke up way too early to a whip across the face. I cursed her under my breath, in a tongue that served no purpose now but to be unknown. I went back to mining, and, since she was elsewhere, I had a chance to look around. The first thing I noticed was Spike, hardly as tall as the pick he was using.

“‘Sup, little man?”

He glared up at me. “You call me little man again and I will tear your eyes from that deformed blob called a skull.”

“Damn, dude. I didn’t mean anything by it, it’s just something I call everybody.”

“Oh really? Call her that” he said, gesturing at the purple centauress.

“I get whipped enough.”

“Chicken.”

“You call her it.”

“Call me what?” she asked, suddenly behind us.

“Nothin, little man” I said, earning me a swift twenty lashings, but also a great amount of respect from Spike.

“Dude, that took guts. I wouldn’t have thought even Dash would do that.”

“Yeah” I said, wincing. “I hardly ever turn down a dare, though, so I kinda had to.”

He just chuckled. “You do more crazy shit like that, and you’ll get yourself hurt, and bad.”

“You don’t know even half of the shit I’ve gotten into.”

“I think we’ve got some time, so why don’t you let me in on your secrets?”

I chuckled. “Alright. Well, there was this one time, in my freshman year of college. I was dating some bitch. I knew she was a bitch, even at that time, so Kiqo dared me to cheat on her. I had never done this, but I honestly had nothing to lose. To spice things up, he had me date her roommate.”

“Oh sweet Celestia. He is out for your soul, isn’t he?”

I couldn’t help but laugh. “Nah. That was the best angry three way I’ll ever have.”

He just stared at me in disbelief. “Alright, now I have to know everything.”

“Well, I went over there to pick them up. I had a date with each of them, same night, same restaurant. I went over there, they were both dressed up, and they both said ‘Hey, honey!’ as I walked in. The looks on their faces was priceless. I honestly will not forget that moment. First, they looked shocked, then pissed, and then I can’t remember anything else ‘cause I was knocked out cold. What I did wake up to was one on my crotch, one on my face. I think they were trying to hurt me, since Melissa, who was the cowgirl, was leaving bruises, and Brianna, on my face, was choking me with her knees. If I wasn’t so masochistic, I wouldn’t have enjoyed it so much. But, as it were, I enjoyed every second of it.”

“Oh, you’re a masochist, eh?” she asked from behind me.

I started sweating profusely. “No, no! You must’ve misheard me. I’m not a masochist. Wherever did you get that idea?”

She just grinned sadistically. I began backing away, but quickly met rock. She quickly grabbed me and carried me away. She strapped me to a rack, one that seemed pulled directly from a medieval torture chamber.

“Now, my pet” she purred, stroking my stomach with the end of her whip. “Let’s see just how masochistic you are!”

She proceeded to flog me, leaving red welts and gashes all across me. I, of course, raised nothing, and she seemed disappointed.

“I guess you aren’t a masochist” she poked my sheath, where my equine shaft still lay. “Not even a little. Oh well” she said, unfastening by bands. “Back to work with you.”

I limped back to my tunnel, and Spike was very shocked to see me.

“Dude, did she even-” I cut him off before he could finish that thought.

“No. Just, no. I don’t wanna talk about it.”

“Alright, man.”

“Ya know, in a way, my never turning down a dare did get me hurt. In a very roundabout way, but it still did.”

He chuckled. “I guess it did. Any more stories?”

“I jumped out of a second floor window.”

“Dude, awesome. This was before you had wings, I’m guessing?”

“Yeah. Kiqo was big into freerunning and parkour back on Earth, and he jumped off the roof of a two story building. He tried to get me to do it too, but he only managed to get me out the window. Still hurt like a bitch, though.”

“I can imagine. This one time, Celestia landed on the balcony of the library, and I fell off in surprise. I, thankfully, landed on my feet, but it was still pretty painful.”

“Damn, dude. Sounds like you’ve got a few stories of your own.”

“I once filled a beautiful unicorn with pain” he said, trailing off sadly.

“Yeah, I heard about that. I think Kiqo fixed that, though.”

“Yeah. She should be giving birth, soon, though. It isn’t supposed to last much longer than the end of this year.”

"Well, maybe you’ll meet him later. If we survive this, that is.”

“Why do you say he? I could have a daughter.”

“Well, after hanging around Kiqo so long, his friend sort of picked up on me, and established a connection. Ever since, He’s spoken to me in a way similar to the way he talks to Kiqo, only less.”

“His friend?”

“Oh, yeah, I guess he hasn’t told you. He is the warden of an omniscient Beast, the Beast of Words to be exact, and He speaks to Kiqo.”

“Why didn’t he tell us this before?”

“Hay if I know. It probably just slipped his mind.”

“So, this God of his, what exactly does He do?”

“For one, He’s a Beast.”

“What does it matter?”

“God implies holiness, a side of good.”

“So He’s evil?”

“No, He’s neutral. Hence why he’s the Beast of Words.”

“Alright, so He’s neutral. But what does he do?”

“He is words. I don’t think I could say it better. He just is. He’s prone to violent mood swings, so he made a deal with the other Greater Beings, and had himself locked away in a blank universe. Each time a warden dies, a new one is picked, and Kiqo happened to be the lucky, or unlucky, one.”

“Anything else I should know?”

“I’m a Knight of the Heart.”

“I have no idea what you mean by that.”

“I figured as much. It’s a family tradition. When one of us turns sixteen, we are contacted by someone, someone who is completely unknown, and they tell us our Path. In my case, I am a Knight of the Heart, which means I must endure pain. But, since I am of the Heart, I must also endure emotional pain, like loves lost.  As it is now, I am in the phase of the Wanting Heart, since I am in love, but separated from my love.”

“That’s definitely odd, but how do you know you can trust this anonymous guy?”

“He’s never been wrong. As soon as I got that letter, I knew he was right. I had always been more courteous to the ladies, been able to withstand pain, both emotional and physical, and when I picked up my sword, it felt right.”

He continued his mining, but adopted a more thoughtful demeanor. “Does anyone outside of your family get these letters?”

“Only if they join the family before they turn sixteen.”

“But, it could be possible?”

“Not just possible, but recorded in the annals of history. My great great great great grandmother was adopted at the age of fourteen, and when she turned sixteen, she received the letter. She was a Rogue of the Mind.”

“Rogue of the Mind? That sounds interesting.”

“Yeah. I only heard legends, since we were a few generations separated. She was unlike other Rogues. Instead of harming folks with a blade, she harmed them with her tongue. She was no big political influence, but she was a hardcore freestyle rapper.”

“Your great great great great grandmother was a freestyle rapper?”

“Yeah” I said, chuckling. “Does sound weird, but I heard some of her songs. Even in her generation’s language, it still held resonance and power. In fact, I used one of her raps when someone pissed me off. No one ever fucked with me again.”

“I don’t suppose you’re going to sing it, are you?”

“Nope. I’m no Bard. Even if I were, I couldn’t remember it to save my life.”

“Oh well, maybe some other time.”

“Maybe. Right now, though, I think they’re serving our slop.”

“I’m honestly surprised we didn’t get whipped for chatting.”

“Maybe she broke her whip on me” I said, laughing with Spike.

However, a biting lash told me that she was keeping her whip hand strong.

“What was that for?” I asked her, rubbing the red welt on my back.

“For old time’s sake” she said, winking.

“Dude, I think she’s got the hots for you” Spike said, a look of pure disgust on his face.

“From what I know about their anatomy, she can’t. Just like a fish, there’s no sex involved. The female lays an egg in their pregnancy sack, and the male fertilizes it.”

“That’s a sad, sorry existence.”

“It’s not so bad, so long as you love each other.”

“Yeah, you and Dash did go for a while without genitals, didn’t you?”

“Yeah.”

We got our slop, and proceeded to dig in.

“Ya know” Spike started. “It’s going to be a sorry existence for her, since I don’t think she’s capable of love.”

The very alien we were talking about cleared her throat behind us.

“Oh hey” Spike said, falteringly. “What’s up?”

She just struck him. She didn’t whip him, since his scales were too thick for that to do too much. She hit him with one of her robotic arms, drawing quite a bit of blood. He held a claw over the gash in his face, and glared at her while she walked away.

“I guess we shouldn’t talk about her. She seems to be omnipresent” Spike said, angrily prodding his rations.

I agreed, then finished my food. When Spike finished his, I told him to keep the trays.

He looked at me, obviously very confused. “Why?”

“Remember what happened when you started hoarding?”

He got it, but then asked: “Is that your escape plan?”

I nodded, and he grinned. “This is going to be awesome.”

“Just so long as you keep control this time. Wouldn’t want you slaughtering everyone.”

“Right, I know.”

He quickly stashed his trays, and rejoined me at the wall. We settled into a routine. Mine, eat, stash, endure, sleep. We followed this routine for an entire year, and Spike was eventually just past the size of the ‘teenage’ dragon when he had last hoarded. We got impatient, and he decided it was time.

She came over, noticed that Spike wasn’t doing anything, and quickly struck him. He caught the blow, and grinned viciously up at her as he broke her arm clean off. She glared at him, and sent five more blows his way. he broke off two more mechanical arms, but took the other three shots, two catching him in the face, one in the gut. When the next three strikes came, he tore off the last arm, and managed to dodge the other two shots.

She recoiled, since, for the first time, she was on somewhat even ground with her opponent. Spike bathed her in roiling flames, bringing her almost all the way down to his level, leaving only her legs as an advantage. What ensued was a battle of epic proportions.

She was without weapons, besides her natural claws, but Spike had a pick handy. She struck at him, aiming for his face, but overextended. Spike leapt over the arm, then leapt off the arm itself, turning his momentum into a roundhouse, and his heel connected with her cheekbone. This sent her stumbling, and Spike was quick to follow up, taking out her right eye with a single slash.

She howled in pain, and reared up like a centipede onto two legs. This gave her even more height, and from that height she dropped herself upon Spike. He deftly rolled out of the way, but still stumbled as the shockwave of her impact shook the roof. I watched as rocks started to fall, and quickly grabbed Rory. Nothing else mattered. I had to save him. I got to him in time, and quickly made for the exit.

A few boulders came crashing down, but Spike moved the one vital one, and we made our escape. Sadly, though, we were the only ones to get out. All the others weren’t fast enough, and got caught under the rubble. Knowing that other aliens might show up at any time, we three quickly made our way to Canterlot. I knew that if Kiqo wasn’t there, it would be a wonderful mountain stronghold. What I didn’t expect was the mother of my child, wingless like us.

When I had finished my tale, Pinkie trotted in, followed by Twilight, Fluttershy, and a whole masquerade of other mares, including both Vinyl Scratch and Octavia.

“I can already tell this is going to be a good story” I said, watching a whole thousand mares appear from a solid wall in a conga line.

“Sure is” Twilight said, diving headfirst into her tale of escape.