The Blank Flank Brigade

It was a quiet evening in Ponyville, as it always seems to be, the moon was high, a quiet breeze was blowing through the town, and the last ponies from Pinkie’s daily celebration were finally staggering back to their houses. The entire town was quiet, the local eateries, and the parks, even the local library, known for its night-owl keeper.

The librarian, had finally settled into bed, after a hard night of, I’m not exactly sure actually, science, magic, the quantum mechanics of friendship? Anyway she had finally finished whatever magic…y science…y thing that she had been working on and was looking forward to a nice Nights rest.

Yup it was just going to be a nice quiet

Wait

What was that bump just now?

Maybe I should go check it out?

Nah, it’s probably nothing, I’ll just go to sleep and OHMYGODTHEREITISAGAIN.

Maybe I should call for Spike, he’s a dragon, maybe he could light them on fire or something.

Spike wake up

spike wake up

SPIKE WAKE YOUR LAZY DRACONIAN SELF UP

Twilight then found herself with a pillow stuffed firmly into her mouth.

Ok fine, don’t help me, we’re all just gonna die.

Maybe I should just go down there, odds are its just somebody who wants to  talk with me, then kill me and ransack the library.

Oh Celestia, I need to barricade the door so they can’t kill us.

One chair, three bookcases, a bed, and a (sleeping) baby dragon later.

Ok I should be safe

Crap I need to go to the little mare’s rooms

Okay, I’ve got it , I’ll just run there and I won’t die, now to unbarricade the door.

One chair, three bookcases, a bed, and a (apparently a very heavy sleeper) baby dragon later.

Okay, I’m gonna go, on three,

One, oh Celestia

Two, I’m gonna die

Three, okay let’s do this

Four, wait what?

CHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARGE

Wait there isn’t anyone down here.

Just then, she noticed a little note on the table

We borrowed a book from the library, don’t worry we will return it when we are done,

Sincerely, the BFB

“Well that’s just great” thought Twilight, as she filed the note in the overflowing “we borrowed it” drawer.

“Why doesn’t anypony ever just check out books normally?”

I’d like to call this meeting of the Blankflank Brigade to order.

Wait your still on the Secret Society thing?

Yes I am.

Wow, normally you give up on these things by now.

NAME ONE OTHER TIME I’VE EVER GIVEN UP ON SOMETHING.

Do I really need to bring up the country club? Or the city club? Or the “Daring Do appreciation club, that in no way is meant to exclude the Cutie Mark Crusaders?”

Hey, that last one is still going on at the moment.

Yeah, and might I ask, how many members does it have?

Six, Me, You, Rainbow Dash, Scootaloo, Applebloom, and Sweetie Bell.

And you don’t see anything wrong with this?

Not really, I mean it has three times the membership of our secret society doesn’t  means more it should be 3 times more powerful?

I’m not going to dignify that with a response.

So anyway, on to business

…

First order of business, the raid on the Celestial Library of Magic, History, and, Science was a great success,

All you did was go into a library, that wasn’t even locked,  and swiped the book.

It was still a great success, I even left a note or they might not have been any the wiser the book was even gone.

Wait why did you leave a note?

We’re borrowing the book, we need to leave a note, how else will they know?

We could just tell them.

And reveal our master plan, that would mean suicide for our order.

Oh so we’re an order now are we? Look, we’re getting off task, I looked at the book, and we can’t do it, not on our own anyways…

Curses, looks like we’ll have to abandon this plan, and disband the BFB, this will go down as the darkest day in our history. What was the plan anyway, you never told me…

That’s because you ran off before I could really explain it, I was even being cryptic about the whole body art thing, isn’t that what you wanted?

Yes definitely, the more cryptic the better, but I still want to  know.

Fine, basically my idea is that we’ll give the CMC false cutie marks to try and break them up, okay?

…

What?

You could have been a little more cryptic there

Oh just shut up. It’s a good plan either way, and we even have a spell that could do it, but we’re going to need a whole chicken, a bunch of magic markers and something called “Fakitrelywel”.

So what’s the problem, we’ll just grab all three, and cast the spell.

Well first of all, neither of us are third level, I’m only second level, and are you even certified at all?

The test was full of trick questions, it asked for a name and date and I put some down.

Oh no, that’s right, you couldn’t fill out the application right.

That doesn’t prove anything.

Yes it does, quite a lot in fact, anyway we’re going to need to find someone to cast the spell.

We’ll just cross that bridge when we come to it.

That doesn’t even matter right now, because we can’t get any of the ingredients, the only chickens I know of are Fluttershy’s, and she is very protective of them.

I’m sure we’ll think of something… Besides, the markers don’t sound too hard to find.

Well they wouldn’t be, but these are magic markers, there is a big difference.

Oh yeah what is the difference?

…

What was that?

[size=6]I don't know[/size]

I’m sorry I didn’t hear you Silver

[size=8]I don't know[/size]

Oh could you say that one more time

I DON’T KNOW OKAY, BUT I’M SURE THEY HAVE SOME WEIRD SPECIAL PROPERTY OKAY

Don’t worry I’m sure we can figure it out.

Diamond I swear to Celestia I am going to kill you

I love you too Silver.

*sigh* Anyway, its all moot because I’ve never even heard of “fakitrelywel” and there are no references that I can find anywhere.

Oh OH  I totally go this one, don’t worry, I’ll see you later, I’m gonna go get a little lost in the everfree forest.

Okay, I guess, see ya.

Wait she was kidding right?

…

No, of course she wasn’t.

*sigh*

I really should follow her, I swear she’s gonna get us both eaten.