The idiot in a blue box: season one

Pinkie-Pie could only stare at the amnesiac Stallion as he fiddled with his gingery mane, muttering happily to himself as he pulled it this way and that, trying different hairstyles. The thick muck that had gotten caked in the strands weren't helping the stallion's task as he tried a messy style, then grabbed a whisk and attempted to try and straighten the mane into a long curtain. His behaviour wasn't the only thing that was making the Party mare stare. normally, she loved hyperactive ponies. They made her smile and want to get her party groove on. But this stallion was different. That look on his face when he tried to remember who he was..it was so sad. Those eyes had seemed so far away and so...tired. Those eyes didn't fit with a stallion like him...

"AAAAAAAAAAARGH! SOMEPONY HELP ME!"

The loud scream startled the pair, both turning to the door. The stranger was the first to react, pushing past Pinkie and rushing to the door. Ponies were milling about, many having burst from their cottages to seek out the source of the noise. Many looked panicked, their eyes darting left and right to try and see the problem. The town had seen its fair share of problems over the years but not something that had warranted screaming in the street. At least not for a few years anyway. So who or what had screamed? The stranger seemed determined to answer that question as he spun in a circle, flapping his ginger mane about, flecks of mud flicking around as he spun. Then he turned as a pair of ponies, dressed in police uniforms pushed past him and made a beeline for the nearby alleyway. Pinkie was just coming out the door when the stranger charged past again, also aiming for the alleyway. It was crammed with ponies, all of whom were staring in silence at something on the floor.

"What's up guys?" Asked Pinkie, bouncing forwards, prepared to make a trademark remark and get everyone laughing again. "Did Bon-Bon step on a...spider..." But the pink mare could only stutter, horrified but what she could see.

A mare lay on the ground, flies buzzing around the thick cloth that the officers had draped over her top half. The smell was the first thing Pinkie noticed. Fresh blood, open wounds. And decay. That was the worst of it. The sickly sweet smell rose up from the rapidly darkening cloth over the mares face...which Pinkie now saw was stained a thick, dark brownish red colour. The stain was spreading. Looking down, she just had time to see one of the bodies back legs, twisted at an odd angle, before the officers dragged the cloth over the body's entirety. A horrified hush fell over the crowd as the officers tried to hurry the onlookers out of the alleyway, urging them in quiet, yet stern voices to give them some space. Pinkie was being moved as though her body was on autopilot, allowing the throng of onlookers to push and herd her back out of the alley and into the mercifully fresher air of the street. The party pony stood there, unable to quite process what she had just seen...True, she had been on many adventures and faced all kinds of perils with her friends. But the party-pony had never seen an actual body before. NEVER before had she seen something like this. It was all...too much for Pinkie. She felt her mane deflate slightly as the image of the body kept repeating itself in her head. The thick smell....the body lying there...the stained cloth

"I-I think th-that was MintBerry-crunch..." Muttered a voice from a nearby onlooker as the crowd began to disperse. "She...She was an ice-cream maker...worked down the road from me..." The voices continued to mutter as Pinkie stood there, frozen. "What could do that to her....never seen such a bite mark...."

"Something is very...very wrong here..."

The voice jarred Pinkie out of her shock induced paralysis. The stranger stood beside her, eyes fixed on the alleyway that the officers were busy securing with security tape and scolding away the few remaining loiterers. There was no playfulness in those eyes now. No trace of a smile upon the sugar caked lips. The strangers face was dark and thoughtful, his body tensing and relaxing as if he was preparing for a big race or exercise. His teeth were pulled back in a grimace, as though he had just seen a loved one under the sheet instead of a random pony. He turned to Pinkie-pie, the thunderous look on his face and gently took her face in his hooves, keeping her blue eyes fixed on his dark brown ones. Those eyes, which had at first seemed so bright and cheerful were now full of something...she couldn't quite describe. But when he spoke next, the party mare listened with rapt attention.

"Pinkie-Pie...that was your name right?" A quick nod from her. "Good. Something is happening here. I know those bites...I can't remember where exactly...but I can help!" He smiled at her. "I need you to trust me...can you do that Pinkie?"

There was something in the strangers voice that made Pinkie smile. Despite the smell now emanating from the alleyway, the horror that lay inside the alleyway and despite the utter randomness that had happened ever since this stranger had turned up...she did trust him. And she began to smile wider as the stranger pulled back from her. She gave a nervous giggle.

"o-oki-doki-loki mr stallion!" She said shakily. "I'll trust ya! Maybe we can get some of my friends to help! Their awesome in tight spots!" She paused for a moment. "Hey...ya need a name! How bout...hmmm...Ginger!?" She asked brightly at the sight of his wavy hair. The stranger paused at the words, his mouth open in a comical O.

"I'll...worry bout that later!" The stallion said, rushing past her. "Come on! Need my blue box!"

Pinkie stood there, staring after the retreating Stallion. The party mare hadn't mentioned her real thoughts on the matter of that scream...But she had a sneaking suspicion on WHO had screamed. And she secretly prayed that she was wrong. Because if she was right...it didn't bear thinking about.

"Hey! Watch it ya varmit!" Yelped Applejack as the ginger maned stallion bumped into her, splashing her with a portion of the thick muck on his coat. The stallion gave her hat a small smile, then dashed off, yelling something about a big...blue...box? "Someponies." Snorted the mare as she watched the muddy stallion disappear into the distance. The apple-selling mare, certified Element of Honesty, sighed to herself as she continued along her way, brushing some of the leftover muck from the front of her coat and flicking the mud from her hat. Applejack had heard about the body that had been discovered in the alleyway near Sugar-cube corner. The farm pony was on her way towards the towering, crystal castle. Twilight would be able to sort all this out. She was a princess and a powerful Alicorn after all. Maybe she could check on her friend, Pinkie-Pie along the way....

"Aj!"

Talk of the devil. Pinkie-Pie herself was hurrying up the street, her eyes fixed on the retreating behind of the mucky stallion. She looked distracted, her poofy mane slightly deflated, her eyes darting about like a madpony. The pink party mare rushed up, screeching to a stop in front of Applejack. She had obviously been running a lot. Pinkie was panting, her chest expanding and deflating like a paper bag somepony might use for a panic attack. AppleJack reached out with a hoof, steadying Pinkie as she stumbled around, trying to regain her breath.

"Whoa now sally!" Yelped the farm pony. "Ya'll need to take a deep breath. Then we can take normal like." But Pinkie's head snapped upwards, her eyes widening at the rapidly retreating form of the ginger stallion.

"Can't talk now AJ! ponies to save, stallions to chase!"

And then Pinkie was off and running, charging away, rapidly dodging bystanders in her seemingly mad pursuit of the mucky stallion. Applejack stood there, staring at her pink friend. Sometimes, she wondered if Pinkie was just as insane as she acted around other ponies. This mad dash towards a stallion in dire need of a bath didn't help the party mares case. Applejack sighed, tipped her hat and resumed her walk towards the castle. Whatever the case, there were more important things to worry about than whatever Pinkie had gotten into her head. Twilight-Sparkle needed to see the alleyway. The farm pony continued on her way, already forgetting the mad pink pony dashing away behind her.....

"Oi!" shouted the ginger stallion as he screeched to a stop in front of the crater that the blue box had formed, splattering an officer with a thick spray of clods and muck. "What are you doin' with that! careful there!"

The officers had attached a length of rope around the box and were struggling to haul it up and out of the crater. A second team of officers were struggling to push the box on the other side, scraping it along the ground, furthering the thick grooves of mud and only furthering their issue. The officers all regarded the stranger with a cool, annoyed look. Who was this ginger stallion, poking his snout into their business and trying to interfere. It didn't help their moods when the stranger pushed them aside and tried to pry open the doors.

"Come on!" Groaned the stallion as he tried to pry open the doors. "I can't...really remember what I need you for..." He growled as the two doors slowly eased apart. "But...could you be a good box and...open these doors for me?" The box let out a loud hiss and a spray of steam hit the stallion in the face. A rod like object sailed through the crack in the doors and bonked him hard in the face. The stallion toppled backwards, crying out in pain as the box toppled backwards in the crater.
"Well fine!" The stallion growled standing up again, rubbing his sore snout. "Be like that then!" The stranger sighed, looking down at the smoking metal rod on the ground. It had once been blue..but now it looked purplish-black, with several of the components melted to slag. "Fantastic!" The stranger groaned. "Melted sonic screwdriver..."

"What's a sonic screwdriver Pocket?" Asked a voice. Pinkie-Pie had appeared, smiling at him. "I know what a screwdriver is...but how can one be sonic!?" She giggled. "It sounds like a craaaaazy drink you'd get at a fancy party to me!"

"I'd...well..." The stallion, Pocket as Pinkie was calling him, stuttered. His voice seemed to have momentarily failed him. "F-Fancy drink...well I..." Then he split into a wide, brief smile. "I like you Pinkie." That remark earned him a hug from the pink party mare. It was a brief hug though, as Pinkie released him to stare at the ground. She bent her legs so that her snout was only a few inches from the ground. She gave a great, big sniff and her face contorted in disgust.

"Ew!" She groaned, sticking her tongue out. "Smells like an ape sat down here! Then rubbed its butt across the ground! Eurgh!"

The stranger knelt down, bending his front legs so he could mirror his companions posture. The mare was indeed right! There was a strong smell, overlaying the current smell of churned up muck and leaves. It was a strong smell, rather like burnt fur and...monkey pee. The stallion paused as though he was preparing to faceplant right into the dirt...then he pushed his snout into the dirt. Then he LICKED the ground, drawing a long line of muck from the ground and into his mouth. The stallions eyes snapped open, bulging and he began gagging, his hooves scrabbling at his neck as he choked and spluttered on the foul tasting dirt.

"Pfft....Serves ya right silly!" Pinkie said, fighting hard to keep herself from laughing. "Lickin dirt isn't something ya normally do!"

"Pah..." Groaned the Stallion as he rolled to a stop and stood up, spitting to the ground. "A hint of sweat, pee and blood...lots of adrenaline and...yes..." The stallion smacked his lips like he was tasting a fine wine. "And...horse fur? Must've been carrying something...a pony." He paused then turned to Pinkie, sniffing loudly. "Huh...And the scent is coming from...THIS way! ONWARD Pinkie!"

The pair rushed off down the road, following the scent that Pocket seemed to have picked up. For her part, Pinkie had absolutely no idea what the Stallion beside her planned to do. She would go with him to help whoever was in trouble, especially if it meant saving one of her friends....But he he seemed a bit manic. All over the place. For once in her life, Pinkie-pie resisted the urge to babble and ask as many questions as she could, bouncing along quietly beside the stallion as they rushed towards...

"Whoa, whoa!" Yelped Pinkie, grabbing the stallion by his tail and pulling him hard. "Pocket, wait a sec!" The Stallion stood up, mouth open in the start of a rant about how she was repeatedly calling him Pocket. Pinkie, not in the mood for such, stuffed her hoof in his mouth. "Th-This is the Everfree Forest buddy! It's dangerous in there!" She shook her head. "I really think we should get some of my friends! They'll know what to do!"

The mare stared in fearful anxiety at the dark, twisting branches. She was no stranger to the forest, having been inside several times...but it had always been with her friends. Now here she was, standing in front of the twisting forest with a stallion she barely knew, who was most likely crazy, a body in an alleyway and a possible kidnap situation! This was a lot more than she was used to handling alone. And coming from one of the six elements of harmony that was saying something. Pinkie twisted round, intent on running back towards the town and alerting the rest of her friends. And that's when the stallion beside her spoke.

"Pinkie...if you do that then you're going to put every...everypony in danger." His voice was soft, kindly and yet stern at the same time. "I'm sure you wanna run and get help...but every second we wait is yet another second where the victims could be in danger." He turned to look at her and smiled kindly. "We can do this together." He gave her a wider smile. "Trust me!"

As it turned out, the ship hadn't been that hard to find. The pair had only been walking through the forest for about an hour when the stallion had held up a hoof and pointed, pulling Pinkie behind a large clump of trees, peeking out through the leafy covers. The ship had a rather boxy design, looking more like a giant rectangle than a ship. At least to Pinkie. It had four thick cylinders sticking out of the back, which Pocket had claimed were engines...though still wondering HOW he actually knew that in the first place. Ominously, the front was open, a bright yellow and red light filtering out into the dark forest. Grunts and snarls could be heard from just inside the ship, coupled with what sounded like muffled whimpers and the whirring of machinery. Several figures were lurching and wandering around the ship. The smell was stronger now, almost overpowering as the figures went about their business.

"Ogrons..." The stallion beside her whispered, watching the creatures move about. "Ape-like humanoids...animals at heart. Mercenaries. Brutal ones at that!" Pinkie-Pie could believe the stallions words. The creatures she was looking at were unlike any she had seen before...and that was including the spirits of chaos, Discord himself!"

The Ogrons were about as tall as the princess, towering over a normal pony in height. They were bipedal, with two long arms which were riddled with muscles. They stood upon two thick legs, all wearing something that resembled a military uniform...stained with unpleasant looking marks and splotches. Thick blonde fur covered the back part of their bald heads, which were themselves rather bloated. Their skin was like leather, brown and mottled. They all carried clubs of a curious sort. Each one seemed to be made of a silver material. They had thick, leather wrapped handles which extended up to a large bulb on the end. The clubs were humming gently as the beasts swung them this way and that, smacking foliage out of their way.

"W-Well...guess we found it right?" Pinkie asked softly with a shaky laugh and a jerky smile. The creatures scared her. She wasn't about to lie. "C-Can we go get some help now P-Pocket?!" She hissed. "This is waaaaay to dangerous!" She turned her head, expecting the odd stallion to agree with her on the spot. But the stallion was glowering at the monsters as though dead set on something. He turned his head to her.

"Pinkie-Pie...i need you to do something for me." His voice was soft. But he was tense. "I need you to distract those creatures for me." Pinkie stared at him. He couldn't be serious could he?! "Those beasts are up to something and we need to stop it!" He pulled her closer. "Pinkie...I can stop this...but I'll need your help."

"B-B-B-But,," Pinkie stammered, her smile faltering. "Th-Those things...they...the-they hurt somepony...a-a-and I think they've got my friend in there!" Pinkie wanted to help her captive friends but...all alone?! The stallion suddenly pulled her into a tight hug, patting her back. Pinkies stammering slowly faded away as he held her gently. When he pulled back, she was smiling again. "O-Ok...i'll do it!" she grinned at him. "I'll put a smile on their faces! They'll be laughing so hard they wont see ya comin!" The stallion smiled at her....and then he was gone, retreating back into the shadows of the forest. Pinkie turned and eyed the brutes wandering around in the clearing. "Oki-Doki-Loki!" She said with a nervous grin as she began rubbing her hooves together. "N-Now...for the fun p-p-part!"

Ten seconds later, she was ready. The Ogrons guarding the ship all twisted round, their mean little eyes widening in surprise. Pinkie was dressed in a quartet of flippers, the same kind one might wear for diving. In addition to the flippers, she was clad in a spinning, polka dotted bow-tie and a pair of x-ray spectacles. A rollup noisemaker was stuck between her teeth and a bright red nose was attached to her snout, which squeaked with every alternate bounce of the mares hooves. To complete this rather odd image, several multicoloured streamers were wound around and intertwined in her tail. Each streamer fluttered about as the mare moved, shimmering in the light like a demented disco. The group of apelike aliens all stared, momentarily dumbstruck as the party-pony danced around, her flippers making loud squeaking noises. Pinkie grinned madly as she blew on the noisemaker. As the paper device unravelled, it released a very loud, very irritating noise rather like somepony loosing a fart and holding the note. The pony continued to dance and twirl about, blowing on the noisemaker again and again, her tail whirling the streamers about, dazzling several of the apelike aliens and making them groan, covering their eyes against the glare.

"Whassup everypony! cheered the pink mare, gambling around the beasts, trying her best to keep her composure. "Who's ready for a party huh?! I got all sorta tricks and games planned!" She giggled, pulling a large pinata, a dart board and a miniature pool table out of her mane, plonking them on the muddy ground. "So c'mon guys! Lets PARTY!" The beasts stared, snarls starting to form on their faces as they hefted their clubs at her. Pinkie stopped bouncing, her fake glasses slipping off her face and falling to the muddy ground. "Uh...nopony in the mood huh?!" She asked shakily, grinning feebly as the brutes surrounded her. "Guess not..." She muttered with another feeble smile as one of the brutes shoved her towards the ship, snorting and grunting in a strange, alien language.

Pinkie had never been inside an alien ship before. If she was being honest, she had never been inside an alien spaceship whilst in the company of six or seven alien apes, all of whom would not hesitate to bludgeon her if she so much as blinked wrong. She was scared and she didn't care if it showed. Her hooves came down upon the metal grated floor, resounding with a loud clang each time, the grates rattling madly as pinkie shook with fear. The insides of the ship were studded with large pods, each of whom were filled with a greenish liquid. Inside each pod was a pony. Some were male, some were female and some, Pinkie was appalled to see, were foals. They all seemed to be asleep, hanging there in the green goop. Each pod was connected to a thick wire, sealed into the wall. The green goop was flowing into each pod, but the bubbles surrounding each prisoner were rising back up through the same tube and feeding down the same hallway the guards were herding her through.

Eventually, the group emerged into a large, circular room. It was rather bare, made of a darker metal, pulsing with green lights, all across the floor and up the walls. The lines pulsed like veins, the bubbles from the pods in the hallways flowing through them. A large, metallic throne sat on a raised platform, with a harness hanging above it. A pod hung there, bigger than the others though with only one occupant. Several glass screens were attached, showing off glowing marks, numbers and other such information that scrolled to fast for Pinkie to identify. All around the walls were more screens, each one showing a readout on a pony inside one of the pods. It made Pinkie's head spin. All this data, all this alien stuff, it was to much for her to handle right now.

"Welcome Pony." Snarled a voice. Hidden in the shadows of the throne...sat an Ogron. He was bigger and bulkier than the other Ogrons still surrounding Pinkie. This Ogron was dressed in bulky, silver armour, with various glowing parts attached. Gauntlets covered his big, hairy hands each crackling with electrical energy. Metallic plates were sealed down on his leggings, making his legs seem a little thinner than the guards around Pinkie. Covering his bald cranium was a helmet, rather like the one Twilight-Sparkle had placed on Pinkie's head a few years back when trying to experiment for the pinkie-sense. Domed, with various lights blinking on it in randomised patterns. A pair of evil, yellow eyes glowed out from below a craggy forehead. The apeman tapped a thick, sharp fingernail against the throne as he sat there, staring at Pinkie, an evil grin fixed upon his maw, showing off his thick, sharpened yellow teeth. Pinkie gulped loudly and tried to plaster a shaky smile on her face.

"Um...h-hi there!" She began nervously. "I-I'm Pinkie-Pie...and you've got my friends in your bubbles!" The pink mare tried to stand her ground. "Ya..Ya need to let em go! I'll give ya a big thank you party if ya do...." The leader Ogron held up a hand and Pinkie felt her mouth shut. Literally, her jaws clamped together, as though her lips and jaws had been forced to shut. "Mmpgpgphm!?" Pinkie yelped, hooves flying to her mouth and scrabbling against her sealed lips. The alpha Ogron smirked wider, seemingly amused by her struggles. He gestured with one finger and the glittering helmet glowed brighter, the lights flashing with rapid intensity.

"Do you know how much power comes from the minds of your species little pony?!" He snarled. "The pain...the fear...all that primal power locked up in your grey matter...It shall serve us well...as will you!" He smirked as he used his mental power to drag Pinkie closer to him. "I could use your mental energy too Pink one!" The Alpha chuckled, leaning in and breathing his fetid breath into her face. "In such a short time...with only ten or eleven ponies...we can make this ship fly...but with the rest of you..." The alpha smirked. "Yes...you shall join the rest of your kind...as OUR SLAVES!" His thick hand reached out to try and grip Pinkie about the neck. Pinkie closed her eyes, terror overcoming her. This was no party...this wasn't fun...she was so scared....

"Ooooooh, now I don't think that's very polite." Said a cheerful voice.

Every single Ogron twisted round to face the entrance to the throne room. The ginger maned stallion stood there, a wide smile upon his face. He strode towards the group, seemingly unfazed by the guards, all of whom were levelling their futuristic clubs at him. Onward he walked as though he was taking a simple stroll through the park. Pinkie felt the pressure around her neck release and she dropped in front of the stallion, coughing hard. Seemingly oblivious to the surrounding aliens, the stallion lent down and picked her up. He smiled at her and gently patted her back, slowly massaging it to help her breathe easier. The alpha Ogron lent forwards, a snarl building on his face.

"You!" He snarled, pointing at the stallion. "YOU! Something is familiar about you! Who are you Pony?!" The stallion looked up from Pinkie. His face had changed. It wasn't smiling anymore. His face was set in a mask of determination. "I DEMAND TO KNOW!" Bellowed the Ogron leader, clenching his fist.

"Glad you asked, my mad friend." Said the Stallion, grinning. "A bit of adrenaline? Companion in danger? the wonders it does for your memory." The stallion stepped past Pinkie and stood in front of the throne. "I'm the Doctor!" He proclaimed. "I'm a timelord. I am over 2000 years old. I'm from the planet of Gallifrey in the constellation of Casterberus." He smiled at the Ogron leader, who had suddenly stiffened in his throne, gripping the sides so hard that the metal was bending. "And I just wanna ask you one question." The stalli....no. The Doctor smirked at the leader of the beasts. "Is this world...defended?" The leader seemed frozen, unable to move or speak. "Is this world....defended?" The Doctor demanded again. "And have you ever heard...about anyone who stopped me?"

BOOM

Pinkie wasn't quite sure what happened next. The Ogron leader had jumped to his feet, hands pounding his chest like a bizarre gorilla impression. The screen on every side of the throne room were glowing brighter and brighter, the data scrawling across them increasing to a blinding speed. The pods around the room were all cracking, green goop spilling out across the room....and then...She and the Doctor were were standing in the clearing, looking up at the night sky...as though nothing had happened. The only evidence to the contrary was the ring of slumbering Ponies, each covered in a sticky film of green slime. The Doctor turned his head to look at Pinkie, grinning widely.

"Orbital teleportation." He chuckled. "Offloaded all the hostages and ran away to the stars!" He grinned at Pinkie. And the mare felt a smile of her own growing on her face as the first of the victims stirred. "Am I good or what huh?!"

Ponyville was in a state of celebration. The various missing ponies had finally come back to them, each telling a tale of the fearsome ape-men that had grabbed them, spiriting them away to a nightmarish ship of metal, green slime and talk of enslavement. There were even rumours that the princess of friendship, Twilight-Sparkle herself had been snatched. But that was over now! The ponies had returned and that called for a celebration! The various cottages were alight with balloons, candles and even full on torches. Every single pony in the town seemed determined to bring their A game to this celebration. Well...almost every pony.

"Sooooooo...you're an alien." Grinned Pinkie-Pie as she and the Doctor stood beside his blue box. The pair had slipped away from the party earlier on. Pinkie was determined to find out who her new friend actually was. He had saved her and several other members of the town after all.

"Yep." The stallion smirked, tossing his gingery mane over one eye, still unsatisfied with the way it looked. He grinned at Pinkie as though admitting his alien origins was one of the most normal things he did during the day. "Anything else you wanna know?"

"You...fight aliens." Grinned Pinkie. "And ya save Ponies right?"

"Well...that isn't all I do Pinkie." Grinned the Doctor. He turned his head towards the blue box and smiled. "Have you ever imagined...seeing another world Pinkie-Pie?" He turned back to her, grinning. "All of creation, yours to explore. Any time...Any where...Any Place?" He smirked at the pink mare, who was practically shaking with what appeared to be excitement. "But...it gets pretty lonely out there." He smiled at her. "So....uh...wanna come with?"

Pinkie-Pie froze. Literally froze. The Doctor paused, looking concerned and reached out to gently shake Pinkie, worried her might've said something wrong. And then Pinkie dived into the stallions arms, laughing madly as she used her body weight to spin him around and around and around. She was laughing happily, her excitement spilling over as she squeezed the Doctor tightly.

"Oh my gosh! Thank you! Thank you! Thank you!" Pinkie laughed as she finally let got of the Stallion. "Are ya serious?! Any TIME! ANY PLACE!? I'd be slapped-silly to pass up this!" She laughed madly, grinning at the Doctor. "I"m going on an adventure with a TIME TRAVELLING PONY!"

The Doctor grinned as he clicked his tongue twice. Twin blue doors slid open and the pair of ponies made their way into the machine. No sooner had the doors swung shut, than a loud wheezing, groaning noise had started up, the light bulb on top of the TARDIS roaring to light. The box began to fade, hurling Pinkie-Pie and the Doctor through space and time...

And off for another adventure....