My little werewolf

AUOTHORS NOTE: this is just a bit of a warning, this next chapter contains some religous rants, so if any talk of religion offends you, don't continue. if it doesn't, however, feel ffree to continue. all the religious beliefs mentioned are my own, and this is how i'd react if i killed... wel, anyone.

“Bless us all, o Lord, we pray, for loved ones, here and near, and far away. And everyone for whom we pray. Keep us safe each night and day, the homeless who have no place to stay. Those who are suffering in any way. The dying, those mourning or grieving and all who need God's mercy. Keep us safe, Heavenly Father, when we are at home, or traveling on our way, or when we are vulnerable, or in danger in any way. Most merciful Father, hear us as we pray for the souls in Purgatory, or who may be sent there some day.”….. alright, first off, I took more then a minute….. It was more like a few hours. Second off, I’m not very religious, but after everything that had happened since I showed up here in Equestria, I needed something to believe in….. I needed to feel like my actions could be forgiven. At the time I was kneeling next to my bed, in a room that had been provided to me, and had traded my armor for some pajamas that Rarity had made for me. I had received plenty of lectures about killing Spectrum, but I didn’t really hear any of them… I was in too much shock at the fact that I could do such a thing.

“That was nice…. What is it?” I looked behind me to see Rainbow Dash standing there, looking at me. I turned back away.

“A lot of humans believe there’s a higher power, some all powerful, all seeing being, who guides our lives with an invisible hand. It was a prayer to that being….. I just hope he can hear me.” I said, feeling my eyes begin to tear up. For some reason, whenever I got into a discussion about faith, or god, I tear up. It’s weird.

“What’s the prayer for?” she asked, walking closer to me. I sighed.

“Forgiveness.”

“For who?”

“Myself…. And humanity as a whole. You see…. With this belief in God…. Most people also believe in heaven, a paradise where those who have lived good lives go when they die…. But if you believe in God, as the saying goes, you have to believe in the devil…. If you believe in heaven… you have to believe in hell…..” I said, trailing off a bit. I didn’t want to be some kind of missionary, preaching a faith that I was barley clinging to myself, but if she asked, I would tell her.

“Hell?” I should have seen that coming.

“It’s where people who live only for themselves go, to spend eternity burning in flames, tortured by demons. The devil is basically the pit boss down there…. I guess I’ll meet him someday. Ask him why he does what he does.” I said. I was really depressed at the time, and when I’m like that, I tend to forget myself.

“What makes you think you’re going to hell? You seem like an alright guy.” she said. At this point she was sitting right next to me.

“Well…. In life, I blamed God for all my problems. There was nothing I could do to solve them or prevent them, and I always saw god as a being who was supposed to watch over humanity, and keep us safe from ourselves. But… as I grew older, I began to believe that no God would allow the beings made in his image to destroy themselves like humanity has. I just kinda…. Stopped believing….. After a while, though.. I began to believe that god did exist… but that he saw how sick, twisted, and corrupted humanity was as a species, and just left us to our fate. If you ask any preacher, any of those things earns you a one way ticket straight to hell, do not pass go, do not collect two hundred dollars(yes, I made a monopoly joke…. You know how it goes.). But then, there are also these rules that they say we’re supposed to live by. Do not murder, do not steal, do not cheat, do not lie, and the list goes on…. When I killed Spectrum….. I’m pretty sure I broke the last of those rules… I didn’t have to kill him… but I did… that, and suicide also earns you a ticket to hell, so I’m pretty sure that’s where I’m going, no matter what I do.” I finally finished my religious rant…. Never gone on one of those before…. Oh well, shit happens.

“I…. I’m sorry…I had no idea…” she said. Were those tears in her eyes? Great… now I made a pony cry to. Just. Fucking. Awesome. I’d been sighing a lot that day, so I decided not to.

“You have nothing to be sorry for.” I said, putting an arm around her shoulder. I couldn’t be there for her the way she wanted me to be there, but by god I wasn’t gonna let my problems bring her down. “if I’m lucky, I won’t have to worry about that for a long time. For now, I’m just focusing on fixing my mistakes, and setting Equestria right again” I said. She just looked at me, her big violet eyes filled with tears and burning into my soul. Sad pony makes me sad. As does her question.

“Do you think…. I’ll go to hell?” she asked…… yeah, she asked me if she was going to hell….. It killed me inside.

“No…. No of course not.” I said, hugging her tightly. I don’t know why, but I just felt compelled to comfort her. In the show, and all the fan fictions I read, she was often portrayed as someone who, while she was loyal to her friends, tended to think of herself and her reputation before others…. And yet here she was…. Not caring what anyone thought of her…. Just asking if she was a good pony… not the proud, hot headed pony most people make her out to be, but someone who is willing to admit their mistakes and their shortcomings. That night, I fell asleep on the floor, with her in my arms. She cried onto my shoulder through the night, even after she had fallen asleep. Minus the crying, she slept rather soundly. I, on the other hand, was having the most terrifying nightmare of my life.

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The beast runs through the forest, leading it’s hunters deeper into it’s depths. Deeper into darkness. Deeper into the moonlit night. “It went this way! Follow me!” comes the voice of one of the hunters. A voice the beast knows all to well. It continues running, looking for a spot to wait in ambush. It spots a tree, one of the branches high up, and sealed from the lesser vision of the hunters by branches. The beast climbs to the tree limb, and waits for it’s prey. “Hmmm… the tracks stop here. Stay alert, it could be anywhere.” came the voice again. The beast knew the owner of this voice, and wished no harm upon them. It simply wished to be left alone. But it knew that was not possible. It jumped down, landing on one of the hunters, killing them instantly. Then it lunged towards another, slicing them in half, and eating their entrails. Another tried to attack the beast with a sword, but the weapon was swatted away, the attacker fed on while they were still alive, their screams echoing through the night as the beast continued to feed, sating it’s hunger. Then, only one was left. The beast looked at her with pleading eyes, whimpering. The beast knew her well, and hoped she would simply leave. But he also knew the rainbow manned pegasus was to bold and brash to simply let him be. “Christian…..” she called out to him, using his true name. he cringed at it’s mention, but did not flee. “Christian!” she called again, louder, and slightly angered. He knew this could not end well….
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“Christian!!” she yelled at me again.

“JESUS FUCKING CHRIST!” I yelled, waking up from my nightmare. “Jesus…. Holy shit, it was just a dream… just a dream…” I said again and again until Rainbow cut me off.

“Dude, you were whispering weird stuff in your sleep…. Really weird stuff, like you were having the most messed up dream ever.” she said, looking at me like I had said I was going to rape someone…. Wait a minute… shit, maybe I did. Only one way to find out.

“Like what?”

“Like stuff about eating ponies’ guts, and about just wanting to be left alone…. It’s really creeping me out.” she said, which oddly put me a bit at ease…. It could have been worse.

“Well, oddly enough, I was having a completely FUCKED UP nightmare about that kinda stuff… it was really freaking me the fuck out.’ I said, shaking my head… which turned out to be a bad idea, for two reasons. First, I already had a headache, and shaking my head made it worse. Second, Rainbows face was closer to mine than I thought… you see where I’m going with this?……………….get your mind out of the damn gutter, you sick freak. Well, the way I shook my head put her head directly in the path of my face, and thus, I hit her head with mine… now we both have really bad headaches.

“What the hay was that for!?”

“agh, shit. My bad. My depth perceptions kinda off without my glasses.” I said, reaching up to see if my glasses ha been pushed up my face(stranger things have happened, bro) only to find them still sitting right in front of my face. I took them off, only to find out that selling my humanity had the same effect as being bitten by a radioactive spider(please don’t sue me marvel… I’m poor). Being, my vision was now better than twenty/twenty. I could see perfectly. “Whoa…. This is some trippy ass shit right here….” I said, moving my glasses up and down out of my vision.

“Ummmmm….. that’s… great?”

“You have no idea…… I’ve been wearing glasses since I was a kid….. Now I can finally get rid of these damn things…. It’s FUCKING AWESOME!” I said…. And she probably thought I was stoned, but I was okay with that. I could SEE!!! It was awesome! I stood up(causing Rainbow Dash to roll off me and onto the floor…. I found it amusing, but I tried not to let her know it… aaannnd she’s reading this over my shoulder… I’ll be right back…………. Alright… I’m back, and I now have a black eye… but it was worth it.) and threw my glasses at the wall as hard as I could. They snapped half, which was oddly satisfying.

“Was that necessary?” I looked over to see Twilight staring at me.

“You’re damn straight it was. I’ve been waiting to do that for years.” I then realized how awkward it must’ve been to see me and Rainbow sharing a room after that whole episode last night, while we were playing never have I ever….. Thinking about it more, it would be really damn awkward…. Shit… “Ummmmm…. If you’re thinking what I think you’re thinking Twilight….. Then no….. no we didn’t.” I said. Apparently she was, because she sighed in what seemed to be relief…. But I suck at reading people, and the same concept applies to ponies, ergo, I suck at reading ponies.

“That’s good…. Because that would make you a mmmaaaajjjjjor hypocrite.” she said, looking at Rainbow, who seemed confused.

“A what now?” she asked.

“I’ll explain it when you’re older.” I said before I started laughing my ass off. I couldn’t help myself. And she couldn’t help stop herself from trying to tackle me.

“Why you cheeky jerk! I’m a full grown mare, ya know!” she said, clinging to my back. I was now flailing around, trying to get her off of me.

“Yeah, right, and I’m a full grown man. I’ll believe that one when I lose my virginity!” I said….. I then realized what I said, and mentally face palmed.

“That could be arranged….” Rainbow whispered in my ear in the most seductive tone she could…. And I would be lying if I told you I wasn’t tempted for a moment…. But then I shook off that temptation, for the sake of my humanity.

“I’d rather it wasn’t, thank you very much!” I yelled, trying to shake away the mental images that were invading my mind…. They were very disturbing. At least for someone who doesn’t like ponies like that it was. Like I said, if I were a pony, it’d be a different story, but I’m not.

“Aaww, why not? I promise I’ll be gentle…”

“ALRIGHT YOU TWO, THIS IS GETTING AWKWARD!” shit, I had forgotten she was there.

“You’re telling me!? I’m the one she’s trying to seduce here…. And she’s on my back still! I told you last night Rainbow, no!” I said as I finally managed to throw her off(not literally of course, I’m not that big of an asshole). “Jesus, there’s this thing called a species barrier, ya ever hear of it? It tends to make certain things awkward.” I said… and then she got this look in her eye… that I reallydidn’t like.

“Rainbow…. If you’re thinking what I think you’re thinking…..” said Twilight, but she never got an answer because the blacksmith walked in right at that very moment.

“Alright lad, yer equipment’s done. Come with me, an’ I’ll get you fitted out.” he said. I had never been so happy to be away from ponies in my life. We walked through a shit ton of different hallways, which made me feel like the whole place was a maze. I hate mazes. “Alright, here we are lad. Now, this swords special, made entirely out of starlight. Blades like this one are only given to the most honored hero’s…. I guess yer one of them now, ain’t ya?” he said as he handed(or would it be hoofed?) me the sword. The blade was a pure white, and hot to the touch(word to the wise… don’t touch the blade!) and the hilt was pitch black. It looked like…. “Obsidian. Strongest thing we got ‘round here. Now, yer shield is made’a bits’a the night sky. Luna went an’ got them herself, so you should feel honored. It’s light as a feather, but even an angry dragon couldn’t get through this stuff.” he said as I took the shield. He was right. It was light as air. I gave the blade a few practice swings, careful not to-”watch where yer swingin’ that thing! Ya almost cut off my other ear!” shit… I should probably stop that now.

“Do I get a scabbard for my sword? Or do I have to hold it the entire time?” I asked as he walked away. At first I thought he was just leavin’ me hangin’, but he came back with a dusty old scabbard.

“Yer the first one in almost a thousand years to get to use this old thing. Don’t lose it lad.” he said as he buckled it around my waist. Did I mention he’s a unicorn? I think i might have forgotten that.....