Equestrian Gamers

[Ponyville, 12 years before the return of Nightmare moon.]

It had been one year since my apprenticeship with the town blacksmith ended and she left me in charge, basically. Apparently I left a helluva good impression on Iron Hammer, as she lets me have most of the proceeds from my work. Either that, or I don’t understand how bits work after twelve years.

Fat fucking chance of that, what with my parents being retired co-ceo’s of the weather factory. I mean seriously, those two could spread bits further than they could icing on a cake… Aaaand now I’m craving sweets.

I grumbled grumpily as I put up a sign on the smithies window, stating that I would be back soon, and was gone for lunch. I hated that even though I didn’t need food to live, I still had cravings. I eventually made my way to the town square as I saw Applejack and her parents, along with Big mac, walking through town. I smiled at the sight of them, and waved to them before sighing, still trying to figure out what happens to them, to try and protect them.

I grinned at the memory of my cutie mark, that showed up last week. A red hot shield, with a hammer beating on an anvil behind it. While my parents were concerned about my having a shield as a cutie mark, which often meant military service of some sort, Shy and Mana burst couldn’t be happier for me.

I made my way to the newly opened Sugarcube Corner as I was quickly seated by none other than Pinkie Pie herself. “Hiya! What can I get for you today?”

I rubbed my chin in thought for a second before sapping my fingers, a smile on my face. “I’d love a chocolate eclair, please, cream filled.” God was I was glad Mana wasn’t here, lest she make some weird lewd comment. Damn girl could not appreciate the deliciousness that was cream filling for donuts. “So, you new around here? Or did I just miss meeting you for this whole time?”

Pinkie pie giggled as I waggled my eyebrows. “Well, I’m new here, just came as an apprentice to the Cakes. Why you asking? I mean, you must’ve seen my invite to my welcome to Pinkie party I threw Ponyville!”

I shrugged. “I saw it, but it was on a day I had work, so I couldn’t go, sadly.”

Pinkie rubbed her chin now. “Hmmm… how do I make up for that…”

I smiled “Go out with me on a date?”

She blushed a deep red. Seems she was not used to being asked out. “B-but doesn’t the mare ask out the stallion usually?”

I shrugged. “Who cares about societal norms?”

Pinkie was about to respond, but I then heard a scream of fear coming from outside and ran outside to see what it was, finding some Diamond dog assholes trying to capture some ponies, I looked to my gear screen and frowned, knowing that if I was to switch to my combat gear, I’d put my life as a blacksmith in danger, what with how the Royal Guard has been conscripting anyone who can swing a sword.

I grunted as I saw AJ and her family hiding under an overturned cart, and knew my decision was made.

I ran at the Diamond Dog forces and switched to my gear set made from the materials I bought with my own wages, nothing grand, just some steel armor and a hammer and shield. I yelled at the Diamond dogs in a loud warcry. “OI! Mutts and Bitches is all you lot are, how about you come bother someone who can fight back?!”

*Skill achieved! Battle cry: Insult and anger the enemy to keep their focus on you, can also be used to frighten and intimidate dramatically weaker enemies.

The D-dogs looked to me angrily before I readied my shield, charging into them with an enraged battlecry. The dogs quickly circled around me and sent in their soldiers first, so as to let their mages and Rogues take potshots at me from afar. I growled angrily and bashed the nearest soldier in the face with my shield, breaking his nose as I caved in the jaw of another with my hammer.

I looked to AJ’s family and shouted as I threw the D-dog with the busted jaw at a mages fireball, frying him nicely. “Why are you staying here?! GO! RUN!”

The family nodded and ran away, me using a piece of busted D-dog armor like a throwing knife to kill the mutt that went after them. “Oh no, your fight is with me, fucking inbred mongrels!”

As I fought them, I felt my power increase, I glanced to the pop up screen that flashed by, seeing that I had unlocked a class system, earning the Adventurer subclass and the bonuses of my pre selected class. I grinned and looked to the D-dogs, who had already been reduced to ten in number from their previous twenty. “COME AT ME YOU MANGY CURS! NO ONE IS GETTING HURT WHILE I’M HERE!”

There was a massive energy surge that I felt in my bones as a figure I never thought I’d meet appeared in a sizzling crater. It was Celestia, who simply looked at the Diamond dogs, and the blood all over the square, as well as the dead D-dogs, and her mane ignited. “You swore that no ponies would be taken, that was our deal, you said that you would never take slaves, and that you would simply dig for gems and hunt predators… I judge the as guilty, guilty of deceit, assault, and breaking of the treaty. I thus am within my rights as sovereign, to execute you as I see fit.” She smiled and simply raised her hand as if to snap her fingers. “So BURN.”

She snapped them, and the remaining D-dogs burned to ash from the inside out before my eyes, the very ashes being reduced to nothing by the wind.

I looked to Celestia and smiled. “Thanks for the hand, I don’t want to know what would have happened if I… well… If I let any go.”

Celestia eyed me curiously. “What’s your name, my little pony? I do not recognize you, yet you handled those Diamond dogs like a professional, helping the civilians escape while keeping the combatants focused on you.”

I shrugged. “I did what any self respecting person would do, I stood up and defended what mattered.”

Celestia raised a brow at me. “But Applejack barely even knows you, when I arrived she said that you saved her out of the blue.”

I smiled. “Just because it doesn’t matter to me, doesn’t mean it isn’t important. If I let those mongrels go, they would of either orphaned or killed AppleJack, who is part of a family that I supply tools to. Also, I just refuse to stand by while someone could get hurt.”

She nodded thoughtfully before she smiled in a slow, careful manner. “So,would you be interested in joining the guard?”

I shook my head quickly. “Not a chance, I just finished my training as a smith and got my own shop. No way I’m-”

She smirked “Guards get three times your expected wages as a smith.”

I took her hand and shook it. “Deal, when do I start training?”

She grinned as we teleported to what looked like the local barracks. “Right now!”

[Day of Nightmares Return]

I was waiting at the edge of the Everfree, my armor on and my weapons ready, I had been sharpening the edge of my twin-shield when The girls and Spike came up to us. I waved nonchalantly as I activated my voice up enchantment. “Greetings, girls. Celestia wanted us to come with.”

Twilight looked to the two of us in shock. “Th-the hands of Celestia… You two exist?!”

Rainbow dash looked to Twilight curiously. “And just who the hay are these hands of Celestia ponies? They friendly, or should I rough them up?”

Twilight grabbed Rainbow Dash by the tail with her magic and yanked her back. “If you so much as flick them, you will be putting us in grave danger.”

RD looked to her incredulously. “Whaddya mean? That guy in white looks like a pompous-”

I promptly drew my hammer and smacked a nearby boulder with it, cracking it into shrapnel that impaled the trees behind it, a whisp of the Nightmare’s mane flying away into the forest. “There was something spying on us…”

RD then looked to Mana Burst. “Ok, I see that the guy in white is tough now, but that mare looks like a strong breeze will knock her over.”

Twilight then whispered into RD’s ear about the one campaign I thought she didn’t know about. The Damascus riots. RD looked to Twilight in shock.. “That was them?! I thought The Minotaurs fought a dragon horde!”

I shook my head. “Nope, I fought their front line and commanded the soldiers as my partner here fought the mages and rogues.”

I nodded. “And my partner here, they have been responsible for the Storm king being dethroned early. I provided the distraction by fighting their armies and commanding a small band of mercs.”

RD’s eyes shrunk to pinpricks. “THAT WAS YOU TWO?! I heard about that! It was a suicide mission, but two heroes won the day, fighting the armies and the king himself! The castle is nothing but rubble now!”

Pinkie giggled. “Don’t forget the scorched earth!”

Spike nodded. “They have a sheet of heroics longer than a hydra's body. The white hand here handles most of the official fights, whereas the black hand handles the dirty jobs, some people say that her armor used to be white too, but all the ash and soot from her demo jobs has left it stained.”

RD looked to AJ and squeed. “This is so awesome! I think I found a new idol!”

AJ smirked. “And Ah think I have too, that White Hand feller seems to be stronger than a bugbear hopped up on ragevine!”

RD smiled. “Yeah, but the Black hand is so much cooler! She just blasts through all the wards put on the Storm king's castle like nothing! Not even the princesses-”

I cleared my throat. “Actually, me and a squad of Diamond dogs dug under the unicorn horn dust compacted pillars responsible for the wards. I planted enough TNT to blow the supports, and set them off as she fired, they were about weak enough that a filly could pierce the wards after I blew the wards. Not to say that she was not impressive, the Storm Kings palace was lined with dragon hide, and reinforced with special magic eating crystal. She basically overloaded the crystals to the point they exploded.”

Fluttershy was off vomiting in a bush as RD and AJ looked not too far off, with equal parts rage and hatred mixed in., meanwhile Twilight and Spike were looking to us in horror. “Please… tell me that you made that monster pay, that dark magic uses the souls of ponies as fuel…”

Mana Burst shook her head slowly, shaking with rage. I then spoke on her behalf. “No, he and his elite soldiers got away, we are still looking for him.”

She then spoke in a barely audible whisper as the words formed for them to see. “I will personally bring him to Thanatos himself to pay for his crimes.”

They gasped in shock, knowing that Thanatos’s realm, Tartarus, was used as a prison for the most elite of evils, and that was just the uppermost levels. Endless pain and suffering for the souls of the damned lay further within.

I grunted. “We’ve both been there. Thanatos makes a lovely salad. And I am still hounding him for his Brownie recipe.”

Pinkie looked to me with a gaze that was equal parts caution and curiosity. I immediately got what the look meant, she was wondering if she should tell the girls who I was, and if I was doing that for her. I shook my head just slightly enough for her to notice, then said. “Someone I love very much deserves that recipe.”

Fluttershy was looking at us fearfully, most likely due to the fact that we were being equated to a horde of dragons in destructive capability, I decided to stop the gossiping right then. “We have work to do.”

As I turned to Mana burst, I motioned for her to follow me, “We know a shortcut, it’s less safe, so we will be going with just us two, we’ll hold the moon bitch off your backs, just get to the castle, okay?”

Twilight looked to us in surprise. “Your not coming with us?”

“No. We are going to keep her busy, you six get the elements.”

Mana Burst smiled and the words. “Age before beauty” appeared before her, to which I snorted and cuffed her in the shoulder.

As our two groups parted, I looked to Mana burst. “Teleport away, oh partner mine.”

Mana rolled her eyes before teleporting us to the castle, I looked ahead to find Nightmare Moon was… eating some sort of pastry? “...What the fuck?”

Nightmare looked to us passively as I frowned at her level. It was at the cap. Depending on her reclasses, we could be in DEEP shit. “And what, pray tell, are you two doing here? Come to avenge your tyrant princess?”

Mana smirked as she sent a volley out from behind me, Nightmare ducking and weaving them like they were barely moving for her. “Nah, I’m just here to kick your ass, and maybe save the world.”

As I looked to nightmare Moon, I had to admit, she was damn sexy, but she had nothing on Pinkie.”Personally, we both love the night way more than the day, buuuut… the sun keeps life on the planet possible. So… yeah, gonna have to fight ya.”

Nightmare moon scoffed as she grabbed one of Mana Bursts arrows, snapping it like a twig. “Like we should listen to Celestia's pawns. Come then! Face us as true warriors!”

I quickly drew my Twin-shield and hammer before I stepped in front of Mana, taking the first hit from Nightmare, which was a large blast of dark energy. I smirked and replied with a flame augmented light ball straight for her ribs, sending hr sliding back few feet. Now, if I had known that her dress was not fireproof like her body, I may have reconsidered.

As it was, we were now fighting a night fixated goddes who also happened to be buck naked. “P-PERVERSE WRETCHES! WE SHALL ENJOY CRUSHING THEE UNDERHOOF!”

I grunted as I blocked another blow to the shield. “Sorry, not a hoof man.. Some help would do wonders pard!.”

Mana burst teleported behind the loony lunar-bitch and slammed a drill of pure mana augmented with light energy into her back, but barely even scratched her enough for a flesh wound.

Mana huffed. “I know this is rich coming from me, but your powers are bullshit!”

I grunted as I looked to Nightmare Moon, who was looking rather… peckish, what with the fact that she was looking at my provisions sack at my belt. “...You want my food?”

She suddenly nodded, dismissing all that happened like a happy puppy. I smirked. “Sit.”

She flopped into a chair she summoned from shadows.

Mana burst was busy cussing up a storm as I formulated a plan, realizing that this was a POSSESSED Luna, who had spent a thousand years without food. “Have a biscuit.” I pulled out one of Pinkies chocolate overload cookies, before tossing it to her.

She ate it like she had just discovered what food was.

*New skill discovered! [Taming] You now have an innate link with animals and magical creatures, like your sister, you can get even the most unruly of creatures to obey. Fully tamed creatures can be made into pets for you and others. [Current level: 1]*

I smirked at the pop up I got, as Mana burst redoubled her cussing. “This is Bullshit! Total, fucking, bullshit! The first enemy I could not bulldoze, and you do THIS to ME?!”

I then thought a moment, before taking out another biscuit, this one made with peanut butter. “Now get out of the nice moon mare, and roll over!”

As the nightmare symbiote leapt from Luna, I tossed it the biscuit, it smacking its lips after snapping it up, as Mana Burst snapped herself. “THAT’S IT! GOODBYE CASTLE!”

I quickly slug Mana in the jaw hard enough to knock her out. I drag her over to the side and sit there with the unconscious mares and the now friendly symbiote pupper. Did I mention the Nightmare Symbiote acted like a dog?

...It really did.

I looked up to see that Celestia was coming down from above, and smiled down kindly. “I knew you could do it, Twi-Wait what?”

I smile at her. “Hiya, I think Twilights across the bridge, if I timed it right. I also have a plan to awaken the Elements for later, don’t worry, but could you teleport Mana burst outside the castle? I need it to look like they were beaten by the nightmare.”

Celestia frowned and did as I asked. “What is your plan?”

I grinned. “I take the Nightmare symbiote into myself, and they use the elements on me, after i augment the Symbiote so that the Elements don’t kill it.”

Celestia's frown deepened. “Why would you save the symbiote?! It is evil!”

I smirked. “I tamed it.”

She deadpanned. The dead in her Pan, was INTENSE. “You tamed it. You… TAMED...it?”

I nodded, before kneeling and picking up the symbiote in my hands, it wagging its rear like a tail and even making a distorted arfing sound. Celestie massaged her temples and sighed. “And you knocked out the two of them… why?”

I shrugged. “I think the separation without the Elements knocked her out, and mana wanted to blow the place sky high.”

She nodded sagely. “Right… she was denied a fight and threw a tantrum… I don’t know why I suspected anything else...” She then sighed and shrugged. “Okay, I’ll leave it to you.”

I nodded and looked to the symbiote, smiling. “Join with daddy, little buddy!”

The symbiote arfed happily before diving into my chest, my armor taking a darkened, Venom-like appearance. I began practicing my evil laugh as I thought out the plan, sending it to my Symbiote, who I will now name Squishy.

I could feel Squishy enjoyed the name, and smirked as the mane six, with Spike replacing Rarity in the group.

I smirked and began to spasm erratically like the Taken from Destiny. I then utilized Squishy’s voice distortion to speak in an extra unnerving manner. “Night… Last… Eternal…”

Fluttershy and Pinkie looked to me in shock as I winced internally, regretting that I had to lie to them. I looked to them and forced a realistic chuckle as I stomped on one of the elements on the ground, specifically Laughter. “No more struggle, my dears, let the dark seep in!”

Twilight looked to her friends and frowned. “No, you might destroy the physical bodies of the Elements, but their spirits live on, in us! The Loyalty to stay with your friends, no matter the hardships, the Honesty to lead your friends down the right path as you share Laughter to keep the sorrow at bay!” As she said this, Pinkie, RD, and AJ levitated into the air, their elements forming.

“The Kindness to forgive our sins, the Generosity to help those in need, and the Magic that ties them all together! WE WILL SAVE YOU, JUST AS YOU SAVED THOSE DEAR TO US!”
At that, the rest of them levitated into the air, their eyes overtaken by a white light as I was frozen to the spot by an unseen force, as they blasted me, I moved Squishy to my inventory, safe from the blast of rainbows.

I then got a pop up, stating that I had finally finished a quest that I had since coming to this realm.

*Elements of Harmony Awoken, mission complete! Side objectives complete: Tame the Nightmare, rise in influence, defend equestria.

Reward #1: Guardian of the Elements unlocked. Now are linked to the force of Harmony, along with Mana Burst, allowing you greater access to your gamer skills, levels of I.D. create and escape past ten unlocked. Calculating… I.D. create/escape reached level 20.

Blacksmithing and Augment skills cross mutate, Sage smithing unlocked: now can inlay arcane runes into smithing projects.

Reward #2: Nightmare Symbiote is now a pet, will gain experience in battle and grow stronger as it accompanies you, loyalty unshakeable.

Reward #3: Can now summon guard regiment: You can outfit and train your own personal guard regiments, and call them to your position magically. These will be counted as Denizens of the world, or as a gamer would call them, NPC’s.

Reward #4: Flight spell unlocked, now capable of soaring in the sky like your pegasus brethren, but without those pesky wing boners!

Custom reward randomly selected! Mighty weapon “Voku; sword of light.” unlocked!

*Tutorial! Mighty weapons: Mighty weapons are weapons with their own souls, meaning that while they are living things that have their own thoughts and opinions, they also grow stronger as you use them. *

I smirked as I looked over my rewards, only for my attention to be recaptured by the six mares, who were looking to me anxiously. I nodded “Well done, my services here are no longer needed-”

Pinkie threw a large rock at my helm, making a loud gong. “Not so fast mister! Take that helm off right now, or so help me I will tear it off!”

I paled and quickly reached for my helmet, knowing that Pinkie and clothes removal was a recipe for disaster. “Alright! Alright!” I removed my helmet, only for the girls and Spike to gasp in shock.

“FURY FORGE?! It was you?! What about being the town blacksmith?!” Fluttershy said, as I rubbed the back of my head.

I smiled sheepishly “I MAY have hired all those part timers for my vacations as a ruse.”

Twilight and Spike froze for a second. “Wait… if you are the white hand of Celestia… then the black hand outside must be…”

I nodded “Yeah, pretty much, had to knock them out so that my plan could go off without a hitch, they got mad about the fight being so quick, and kinda….wanted to blow up the castle.”

Twilight Deadpanned. “I am cutting their candy privileges. FOR A WEEK!”

I en let out Squishy, who had taken the form of a goopy little puppy. “Also, I think I tamed the nightmare symbiote. Had to fake being possessed so that you’d awaken the Elements.”

Fluttershy and Pinkie looked to me in hurt shock. “Y-you lied to us?”

I sighed. “Yes, but it was for a good reason. You all need the elements, it will be a major need in the future. Let’s just say that some certain prisoners are getting a bit… antsy.”

Mana Burst walked in with a huff. “You better let me have a magical Slugfest with the next guy.”

I smirked, knowing of the pony holiday. “You mean that spring holiday?”

“No you bastard!” She frowned and folded her arms. “I meant I want to legitimately fight the next bad guy!”

Fluttershy frowned at squishy. “What does he eat?”

I frowned. “Squishy is a she, I thought.”

Squishy then sent out a thought wave to me, apparently the link between us is magical, who knew. “Squishy has no gender, is goo.”

I then relayed this to Fluttershy, who then nodded slowly, deep in thought as Luna woke up.

Mana Burst fumed with her eye twitching “Stop ignoring me...or I swear to Faust, I will go-”

I wrapped up Mana Burst in a surprise bear hug and shook her side to side. “Relax buddy, the day is saved! And I promise, next big baddie we face, you get to fight.”

Fluttershy then paled. “W-wait… NEXT?!”

Mana Burst was about to speak in her sage voice, when Squishy whimpered and thought at her. “Squishy get hugs? Squishy want be friends.”

Celestia then appeared in the room and looked at Squishy in horror. “THIS WAS YOUR PLAN?!” She looked to me in rage. “That thing corrupted my sister!”

Mana Burst frowned. “I am fairly certain Squishy is like a symbiote, they amplify everything you give them, including emotions.”

Squishy nodded sadly with a whimper. “Was baby, not knew was doing bad... super sorry…”

Celestia froze. “Wait, this… this is squishy speaking?”

Squishy nodded. “Momma Luna make me learn how talk! She sleepy when landed, said she have to lek ture aunty Celly! Say that she was making a friend, and sissy overreact, cause look scary!”

Celestia paled considerably as she looked to her immortal sister, who had spent a thousand years on the moon due to her jumping the gun, and was just waking up, “Hide me. Please.”

I shook my head “No can do boss, I can’t get between you and yer sister, Especially seeing as how I have her baby in my arms.” I froze then, looking to Pinkie. “I didn’t make it though!”

Pinkie shrugged. “Eh, I figured that, I mean, you did say you were going to marry me before ya popped my cherry.”

As everyone blushed at that, Celestia looked to Mana Burst and made a puppy dog face. “Free chocolate if you hide me?”

Mana burst looked pensive as she weighed her options. “Up it to free chocolate for life, and you have a deal.”

She frowned but nodded as Luna yawned and sat up, Mana Burst opening her inventory and cramming Celestia into it before she could open her eyes.

I sighed, and as Luna looked to me questioningly, reached into our SHARED inventory and pulled out Celestia, depositing her at her feet, As Celestia looked to me like a traitor, I grinned “I made no such deal, and Mana Burst DID hide you, so you are out a ton of chocolate, AND stuck with an angry Luna.”

As Mana Burst started to water at the mouth, I chuckled as Celestia sprinted for her life after casting a paralysis spell on Luna. “LIFE FOR THE COWARDLY!”

I then mixed a speed potion and paralysis cure in a cup before feeding it to Luna. She then promptly tackled Celly and grabbed her by the wings and tail. She said something about... “Mashed Alfalfa for every meal, for a week.

Mana Burst frowns. “Overkill?”

Luna shakes her head. “No, I can keep her looking fit for suitors, I just have to sugar the alfalfa to obscene levels.”

Celestia cries out. “SAVE ME!!!”

I grin. “Make sure to use lemon as well.”

Mana Burst then adds. “And cast anti sweetening spells on the alfalfa.”

Celestia then cries out “WHY?! WHY WOULD YOU DO THIS TO ME?!”

I grinned “Payback for all those games of strip poker you forced me to play! I DON’T EVEN KNOW HOW TO PLAY POKER!”

She frowned. “Remember that mission you sent me on? I’m a demolitions and assassination expert… NOT SOME FLIRTY FLOOZY FOR BLUEBLOOD!”

Celestia then paled as Fluttershy leveled her STARE at her, and Pinkie simply began flexing her hands menacingly. “What did she do?” They asked in unison with disturbing grins.

I smiled at Twilight, who was certainly experiencing a .exe crash. I simply poked her in the eye gently. “OW! What was that for?!”

I grinned “I want you to enjoy this next part.”

I pulled a bullhorn from my inventory and shouted into it “ACTION!” Right as I did that, the mares present that had relationships to us all Tackled Celestia, before they teleported to what I assume was canterlot. I then clapped my hands “Bravo! Such righteous justice! Such poetry! I might just cry!”